How Did This Get Made? - Matinee Monday: Lake Placid LIVE! (w/ Paul F. Tompkins & Nate Corddry)

Episode Date: October 9, 2023

Paul F. Tompkins and Nate Corddry join Paul and Jason to talk all about 1999's giant croc horror flick Lake Placid. LIVE from Largo in LA, they cover everything from the movie not reaching 90 minutes yet feeling long, the amazing performances by the cows, Brendan Gleeson reading the stage directions, underwater bears, and more. Plus, we finally get to the bottom of the proper way to say Reese’s Pieces before getting into audience Q&As! (Originally Released 04/03/2015)  HDTGM is going on tour this Oct & Nov! Go to hdtgm.com for tix and info.For more Matinee Monday content, visit Paul's YouTube page: youtube.com/paulscheer Follow Paul on Letterboxd: letterboxd.com/paulscheer/HDTGM Discord: discord.gg/hdtgmPaul’s Discord: discord.gg/paulscheerCheck out Paul and Rob Huebel live on Twitch (www.twitch.tv/friendzone) every Thursday 8-10pm ESTSubscribe to Unspooled with Paul and Amy Nicholson here: listen.earwolf.com/unspooledSubscribe to The Deep Dive with Jessica St. Clair and June Diane Raphael here: www.thedeepdiveacademy.com/podcast Check out The Jane Club over at www.janeclub.comCheck out new HDTGM merch over at https://www.teepublic.com/stores/hdtgmWhere to find Jason, June & Paul:@PaulScheer on Instagram & Twitter@Junediane on IG and @MsJuneDiane on TwitterJason is not on Twitter

A movie that proves that everyone loves Betty White, even crocodile's. We saw Lake Passage, so you know what that means. Swats and they get rolled baby in this belly Rock a rock, stone vest while whipping just in the Kelly I may be see a burlash show with it crowed And take a boba's feet to hit and cruise control J-Man big call in the beautiful jewel Gonna take you from the grove all the way to the road Branding in the street fight a hope to blow off steam Just to suck a plush to our life, a temity grain Shot on it on the bird, then we can't be standing alive

They call it in the badass and he's on the line Cracking eight eight minutes cuz they cool his eyes cuz the bad Jim Bonnie looking kind of night Paul and Julian in literal Jason is getting late Jonas making sure all the monkey shots getting paid they're just a bunch of movies while they making the great Here's a real question for you how to just keep me question for you how to this keep me. Hello people of earth and hello people of Lago. We are live at Lago in Los Angeles. Very exciting. We are very excited to be here.

For those of you that are not here, I just dropped a bunch of stickers on the floor there. So there's a ton of stickers. My great sticker passing out hit a real snag. Basically it's roadkill on the back. So if anyone didn't get a sticker just right back there, there's a ton. And I couldn't pick them up as quickly as I wanted to.

All right, ladies and gentlemen, we have a very exciting show. Finally, a movie that shows that nature and man can't coexist. And we're going to discuss it, analyze it, and get to the bottom of it all. And I need to do that with one of my co-hosts, Jason Manzooka, as pretty much. What's up, jerks? How are you, Jason? I'm good, Paul. How are you?

Very good. How are you recovering from the great sticker debacle of 2015? Well, look, it was touch and go. I feel like I'm not here, but I am here. You gotta get your head back in this game, bro. When I drop not here, but I am here. I have to be here. You got to get your head back in this game, bro. When I drop those stickers, when I drop those stickers, the first thing I saw was that exit sign. Oh, you were like, that's it.

Gone. You're going right out the door. Right out. I cut those stickers up all fucking day. And then that happened. So there's a lot of wet, wet fart stickers on the ground. A lot of stickers from Congo. It says, Amy, blood fart stickers on the ground, a lot of stickers from Congolets as Amy thinks you're ugly on the ground.

Now sadly, Jun Diana and Rayfield cannot be here tonight. It's very sad. Yeah, more than that. Right, come on, yeah, give it a hand. Thank you. Thank you. Make her feel love. She's off recording her own mini episodes about these movies now.

We have Intersteed. How did this get made all star a hilarious guy Actor comedian podcaster, please welcome Paul F. Topkins Hello friends, welcome Paul Welcome, welcome. Paul, you have done the Lord's work. Obviously, this is a show that Jason, Jason, and Juno, and I, we have to watch these move all the time, you gladly jumped into Juno's spot

and watched both of these movies. That's right. We were responsible for over 3 1 2 and 1 2 and 1 2 of your life kind of pissed away. That's right. We were responsible for over three and a half hours of your life kind of pissed away. Look, I'm a grown man, I make my own choices, Paul. But if I may, it tells me for just one second, the renting of these movies, because they were not streaming on Netflix,

could not find them on YouTube. Sure, you can go to a blogbuster though, probably, right? I did not. I can't find my card. I went to Hollywood video. So I rented them on iTunes and then tried to play them on my television through my computer and then that was a whole big thing. And my wife is sitting next to me as I'm just going to say. Do you have an Apple TV poll?

I do. I do. I do. Did you set it up for mirroring? I did. I did. No. It was all do, I do. I didn't just set it up for mirroring. I did, I did, no. It was all supposed, everything's supposed to work. It's just like watching that thing spin, spin, spin. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm getting very frustrated because every technology my life takes two or three tries to happen.

Yeah, I would love for it to happen right out of the gate. Never will ever again, apparently. That's just the world that I live in now. I identify with that as I sat on my living room floor Never will ever again apparently that's just the world that I live in now I Identify with that as I sat on my living room floor last night with my laptop in my lap in front of my TV Watch this because There was no there's some issue with my TV and it was not working and I'm like welcome back to take a talk with Paul Paul and Jason Here's now here's where I stuck in some of the kooky crazy problems we're having with our tech.

But Jason, here's where it stops getting techy and starts getting real. Oh! Sparkheads have a house meeting. Sparkday classic. It's Sparkday a classic mini argument with my wife, which is like, I'm getting frustrated by a thing. And the first, my wife has sniffed a little bit

at the idea that I had to pay money to rent these bullshit movies. She's like, we had to rent them. Did you try Netflix? Like, yes, I tried Netflix. So then, as the thing is spinning, she's like, did you look on Amazon and said video? I'm like, yes, I did!

And then, I'm, the end of all the thing is spinning. You don't want to- I'm like an ass on the worse. I'm the worst. I'm ready to come to the world. I'm the worst. I'm the hell and be like, oh no, thumbs down on you. I'm filled with rage.

And so, like, as the thing is spinning, I surreptitiously look on my laptop like, oh, it is on Amazon Instant Video. I'm so happy. So I have to tell her, it is on Amazon, it's the video. She goes, well you can save money, I was like, you still have to pay to rent it. Yeah. So that was married.

That I apologize. That I apologize. There's like 30 seconds and then I start apologizing. Babe, I'm so sorry, I'm so, so sorry. I'm really sorry, you'm so, so sorry. I'm really sorry. You were right and I was wrong. My wife will make, while we're watching movies for this show, my wife is in this show.

But it would be better if you don't mention who it is. I will. I will. I will. Yeah, I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure.

I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure. He's like, let's just watch 15 minutes of it, and then we can watch the rest of the bachelor. And so then watching one of these movies is almost like a four-night event, because we'll watch like 15 minutes at a time. See, that sounds depressing to me. Yeah, it's not good.

I post-pone, and then I watched both of these today. Yeah, almost killed myself. LAUGHTER And instead came here and talked to you good people about it. But it was misery. It was like Saturday, it was hot, and I was like, I am, I feel gross. I give them each a day. I give them each their own day. Well, let's see if this gentleman, our special guest for the night,

also had problems with technology. He is a fantastic actor. He has a brand new podcast on Wolfpop called Reading Allow. Please welcome Nick Cordray. Welcome, Nate. Nick Cordray. What up, what up? Very excited to have you on the show.

Thank you for having me. So how was your technology issues? Mine was flawless. I watched it at 230 on Amazon Instant Video. Wow. And I don't have a wife. So none of this jibber jabber in my ear. I was in my underwear. I'm a man just dying alone.

Watching terrible movies by my house. By myself dying alone. I just got to figure it out, Nate. I specifically drove to Subway to get my favorite sandwich, and I ate it while I watched this turn of a movie. What a day like that. Favorite, can I say? Yes, especially.

Yeah. Your favorite sandwich at Subway? Or your saying, give it a chance to be anywhere. Give it all sandwiches. If you're favor, it is at subway. We're only asking you this sarcastic because we know it should be at Jersey mics. This episode of Hutteth is going to be brought to you by...

I'm a more of a blimpie guy. I'm from the East Coast, so I like blimpie. Blimpie always scared me. This is one there's like a fat Mike's or something. It's like fat somebody. Oh, that's turtles from entourage is a sales shop. Yes. That's how.

That's how. Was it a thing that was on the show and then came into real life? No, it was a part of us from what I understand. I know, yes. He was on the show on Oh, I'm sorry I got a confused. I thought you were referencing his character from think like a man No, I wasn't in that also named her actor has changed his name to turtle correct

to turtle, correct? To start off, to talk about Lake Placid, I will say this. People always ask me, what is the sign? Why do you know it's a bad movie? And there's certain things I always say when there's a prolonged surfing or skateboarding sequence, that's a sign. But the thing that is a get-give-away for me of a bad movie is when the movie does not even reach 90 minutes. Yes.

Oh yeah. This movie, 83. 83 minutes, and I counted at the beginning at the end, the movie doesn't start until about two and a half minutes, and there's about three minutes of credit. So as the 83, take away five more. So it's in the 70s of actual written, like written, produced material. And it still feels too long.

Yes. Oh, I'm shocked to find out that that's a long one. It still feels very long. Absolutely. But you should be, if your movie is under 90 minutes, you should be a sh- Shame on you.

This is like, this is like almost, this is just a little bit longer than an episode of Scandal. And then, they make 24 of those fuckers a year, all right? That's what $35 million gets you. It gets you 83 minutes of the worst movie I've ever seen. Do you think that the problem, do you think they had a problem patting it out because the central issue in the action of the movie is that the problem, do you think they had a problem patting an out because the central issue

In the action of the movie is that the thing is just in a lake and doesn't care to come out of the lake That's to be a flaw in the movie too. Also also there is nobody Who is in danger Except for some animals and the people that go to the lake to look for the crocodile. Well I Like, that's not appealing. Besides the fact. I will say this though, some of the best performances of the movie were done by cows. That cows.

Cow's are great. Got some good laughs. I was sad. This is what I thought too. I was like, I think the worst monsters in this movie are the people. Because they're fucking dicks. Can I ask? Everyone isICKS! Can I ask?

Everyone is a DICK. Can I ask this question? Yeah. Does anyone think they know who's a hero of this movie? Right! Right! Let's get into it. I'm gonna go run out there and let's see, let's do it.

Quick sampling. How's like? Quick sampling, here we go. Just say who the hero is. Crocodile. Okay. Ready, white. Ready, white. We gotile. OK. Any white. Any white. Yeah.

We got no more hands, no more hands? The Fish and Game Guy, Bill Pohlin. All right, any more hands? Placid. Lake Placid, what do you say? Hector the crocodile whisperer. Who else? Now we're just needing.

No, no, no. No, no, no, no. No, backston. How dare you? Can we talk about this? Stop pretending, stop pretending that it's confusing between Bill Pullman and Bill Paxton. It's not. This is not? This is not a Dillon McDermott Dermott-Moroonie situation. Where you can see the face but you can't remember which name, though.

This is very different. Well, that was just a quick sampling, and that was everyone had a different answer. The Bill Pax, the one being the most surprising. Here's what no one said, Bridget Fonda. She is definitely not the hero of this movie. She is just this thing that I think we're supposed to despise as an audience because the other characters don't like her at all. Okay, now this is what is...

Okay. What is her deal? Oh, I think... Here's what I have. Is that it? She's from New York. She's a scientist. She's a loner going to ask. Is that it? She's from New York. She's a scientist.

And she's a loner as a child. She's a skipping rock scene. Right. But she's made out to be a real bitch, but it's only because she's from New York. No, she has also been gilded by Adam Arkin. I think that's right. Heartthrob of the century.

Adam Arkin has broken her boring heart. Like playing the Bill Pouman role in this movie. Exactly. Adam Arkin. Oh my God. He and Bill Pouman are outboring, boring, and each other. They are both like, so Bill Pouman,

his entire movie is delivered. He watches multiple people die. Yes Everything and a whole time he's like, I don't know what are we gonna do right? Well, I would even go for it. I can do something about that crocodile. We should get to bed the opening See all the way from that to like all the way from I guess we should get to bed to shoot it You get to bet, too. Shoot it. What? Quick, quick, shoot it. The most casual admonition to kill a monster

in cinema history. Uh-oh. The opening, the, oh. Yeah. Uh-oh, it's coming. Literally the opening scene of the movie, the scuba diver, you know, tagging turtles, which, I don't understand why the sheriff has to accompany him.

Oh, yeah. To that. Anyway, well, I don't understand why the sheriff has to accompany you to that. Anyway, I won't really get into that logic, but the man is bitten in half. The sheriff doesn't go like, there is no shot. He's like, yeah, you would think like, you'd be like, oh my, what the fuck? Or anything. And he's like, it's so anything and he's like It's so muted it's It's not even like he's jaded no He's like a small town sheriff, you know, it's not like a big city cop like nope another half of a body that I've found

Zoinks He didn't even find it. He pulled it out himself Zonks. He didn't even find it. He pulled it out himself. He pulled it out. No reaction. And he not only no reaction, the guy grabbed his hand and like in order to look and make a human connection in his moment of death. And Bradling Leeson's like, eh. I'm not sure. Brennick Leeson also uttered one of the greatest lines in film history with that diver before he was bitten in half where they're sort of playful with each other and The diver ribs him or something and I wrote this down. This is Brennick Leeson's response. This is a complete sentence. Everyone's a comedian, sarcastic. Ah!

Okay, I watched the movie with subtitles on. And it was, that was the line. Oh, okay. I thought I was having a sentence. Except there's a comma. Yeah. Everyone's a comedian, comma, sarcastic. You did not perform that comma.

He's not playing for walks. I think he perform that comma. Whether he's on the way from Washington. I think he's like Christopher Washington. I think he's reading the dates all the bunch of. No, I think he's reading the stage directions. Yeah. He's supposed to say it sarcastically and go, everyone's a comedian. I guarantee that's right.

But you know who wasn't reading the stage directions with Bill Paulman? Didn't read a single one. Except I've less all of them were said like this. We gotta get out of here whisper. I will say this though, I believe after watching this, I think that I'm so upset screaming. I think that Brendan Gleason is the only actor

in this movie for whom this film is truly beneath. Like everybody else, I'm like, I can see you in this movie, sure. But Brendan Gleason, you deserve better than this. Yeah, I agree, because he is a phenomenal actor, and it is tragic to watch him have to go through this. It may be uncomfortable. First of all, I am fine with another actor that I really like, Oliver Platte, whose face we are awkwardly looking at on screen right now. I'll turn it off.

I am fine with them being like, hey, do you want to come play a super weird version of Jeff Goldblum and Jurassic Park? A more aggressive, unlikeable version of Jeff Goldblum. We're gonna make you somehow not sexier but more sexually predatory? Yeah. Then Jeff Goldblum. We've kind of like Jeff Goldblum but more rapier. Are you into that?

Yeah. But you'll also be comedic relief, but you're also going to be like the sex symbol. Yeah. The thing that bothers me most about this movie and it's from the very beginning is that this movie thinks that it's funny. Right. It thinks that it's from the very beginning is that this movie thinks that it's funny, right? It thinks that it's really funny, and it's so fucking unfunny. Yes. It's like what the opening, like Brendan Gleason, he doesn't like sarcasm, and then he's

sitting in the boat, and then the guy's down there, you know, being scared by a fish. And a beaver. And a beaver. And a turtle. That was a beaver and a beaver the turtles like oh Oh turtle okay, oh So Brennan Gleason eats a twinkie is that supposed to be funny? He's listening to the partridge family. Oh, yeah, that's supposed to be funny like Like these things are all very pointed, but they don't go anywhere.

It seems like it's trying to make a comment, but they don't know what they're trying to go. It's our cabin fever-esque, like trying to sort of deconstruct that mean a little bit, but David E. Kelly misses on every single. I was just gonna say, this is where we should mention this movie is written by David Kelly. David E. Kelly. And at the height of being David E. Cali Right after Ali McBeal like I feel like you like puffed out an alley McBeal script

They're like hey, we want you write a movie sure and there's another hey, it's only it's only 50 pages You know that he writes he writes all I worked on a show that he wrote and he writes all his scripts long-hand No He writes, I worked on a show that he wrote, and he writes all his scripts, this up. Yep. You gotta sort through there and fucking chicken scratch of genius. Like, at least, at least, like put it right on an underwood typewriter so somebody can scan the pages. Oh, I hate that bullshit. Nobody ever wrote out scripts long-hand.

No, he- Like since the invention of scripts, like maybe Shakespeare, but since modern film and television, no one's writing scripts out in long-hand. I think he thinks he's a charming eccentric, but he does. Yeah, he's the opposite. Well, but that's what this movie kind of wreaks of.

It's like, yeah, I'm above that. I know what this is. And I'm, uh? Like, it feels like. There's a lot of see what I did there. Oh, I imagine him, I imagine like typing a thing, like, oh, not typing, of course. But at breakfast, he scratches out something as legal bad.

And then turns it around from a shell-fifreder, and he like, check it out. And then she's like, I wish I could go back to Fischer's Tevens. So real, ex-boyfriend of hers. The... Look it up. Our one of our researchers, Nate,

just showed me his IMDb bio, which he believes David Kelly wrote because this is what it says. David Kelly might be described as living the American dream. 1990 style, writer screenplay, move to Hollywood, make millions and marry a movie star. And as like former Boston lawyer in the last decade, he he switched careers become a successful television producer who shows are recognized for their quality as well as their ratings. But the American dream... Well 1990 style. Oh yeah sure. Remember when Bill Clinton would give speeches, I hope that everyone will write screenplays.

I want every American to stop being a lawyer. Stop being a lawyer. People. It's successful television producer. Get them shows, get a dance and baby. Oh, I like the bill. Yeah, that's hilarious, right? That's how funny that guy is.

The one thing that this movie, the one thing that this movie brought to me too is just talking about the people in it. I love Bridget Fonda. Like as a person, I was like, not the person. You lover as a person? Not as a person. You are married. No, I love her as a person.

But she's an actress that I feel like for a while was in everything and very good in everything or at least as I remember it to be. And then just stopped. and then I Googled, like, what happened to Bridget Fonda? And everyone is asking the same question. No one knows. She came out to, you know, came out to stump for Obama,

but that was about it. No one has seen her to know what she's saying. I think she might have, I know she married Danny Elfman. From, yeah, from Oingo Boyngold. And then I think she had a child and sort of abandoned the industry. He could she. How could she?

And there's things like like, that could be happening to the world. You're telling me that this person we really love and are gonna spend the rest of this time taking this movie piece by piece apart. Doesn't want to be part of making these movies anymore. He's anymore. What? To do what? piece by piece apart. Does it want to be part of making these movies anymore?

What? To do what? Love a child? Boo, Hollywood is really messed up. The one thing, and I couldn't, and because of this movie written in that tone of, is it a joke or is it not? Like, when everyone's like, is it a bear? Is it a bear? I'm like, what, wait. Or do they really think it's a bear? Right. Because that's the ass-

That's the ass- I think you just swear it's a bear. It's a bear. Under water bear, they bit a man in the ass. Right, and it's like, there was an eye-fucking witness. It wasn't like they found a body on the shore. And they go, put it in. By the way, it's a better opening.

Even if you're not like prehistoric crocodile, you're also not like bear. You know what I mean? Like, you know something's up. Yeah, aquatic, something that leaves in water. Something water-based. Yes. Yeah, bear.

One of those water-bearers. One of them. One of them water-bearers. Maybe the bear got lost. Polar bear? They go in water. Polar bear in the lake, everybody. Yeah, that's a really good point.

I think Jason, we brought it up or probably brought up the fact that it doesn't affect anything. No one goes to this lake. No one's affected by this. It seems like this is a peaceful creature. Well, that's the thing we find out the Betty White, you know, midway into the movie, has been feeding and raising these crocodiles for years. For years, for years and years and years.

And up until now, the only people that have been killed are her husband and the turtle tagger. Yeah. And that's it. Yeah, why? Why all of a sudden do this crocodile get a thirst for human? Only because humans apparently once turtle tagger gets killed cannot get to this lake fast enough to be eaten. Everybody's like, I got to get to that lake

placid in New York? No. In Maine. In Maine, yeah. Lake Placid is a place. Yes. In New York. That's right.

This movie is not like Placid New York. It's a movie called Lake Placid that's said in Maine. Go fuck yourself. And again, that again, maybe something is lost in the long hand trends and the translation because it's like, why not just go back, oh yeah, let's put it in like plastic. Or let's not call it like plastic. Like they make a thing out of it like, yeah, yeah, we're going to call it like plastic, but there's another one.

Because it's too clever a title to not use Paul. That like was anything but plastic. but there's another one. Because it's too clever a title to not use Paul. That wasn't anything but plastic. There was a giant prehistoric crocodile in there. And this movie, like look, whatever movie you see out there for even as dumb as Sharknado is. There is at least... How dumb is it, sorry.

There is at least the smallest reasoning of what is going on. I'm not saying it's good. I'm not saying it's worthy, but at least someone gave a shit to be like, well, this is my theory on what has happened. We feel obligated to say, Yes, a thing caused this to happen. Here, nope, our movie will be 90 minutes long. And we're not gonna give you any, I mean,

you put it together yourself. It was here all along. I don't know. Go. No, Betty White tells us it followed her husband home once. From, but that was like from fishing in the lake. No, in the ocean, I think. Oh, okay. Oh, I thought he was fishing in the lake Maybe I don't know that I was saying it yeah, follow them home. I didn't want to kill him

Just kind of like the boat. Well, it's weird is when Betty White feeds the crocodile a cow or whatever whatever. Where is she getting all these towels? Really expensive! Plus, weirdy she has a really expensive. Yes. Look, a lake, you can't have a fucking farm on a lake and a little of nowhere in me. What's weird is when she's leading the counter to the thing, the crocodile just sits in the water like this.

Just waiting. Just like patiently waiting in the vehicle. Like those YouTube videos of the dogs where they stick the treat on the nose. And then she's like, she says whatever, time to eat or whatever. And it's like, Ralph. And it's just like, munches down that fucking cow. But it seems to me that she's feeding the cows at an alarming rate. So she's either raising cows in a very speed, it's been a genetic system that we have not seen. Or she's getting a better movie, a better movie.

Or she's getting, Betty White, Cloud Cloner. What's it to you, fuckface? Yes. Yes. No, I think fuck shit. Yeah, fuck shit.

There's another line. I wrote down a line, too, that was also very weird. Which Brendan Gleason has, which is, I have one of my He says to He says to all the plap he says I think you are a mental I think you are Mental I read it I read it. I read it three times and he says it later in the most

He says it multiple times. I think he's a total mental. He says to someone or something like that. But I believe you are a mental. A mental. And nobody was like, everybody was like, do we get that? Do we get that? Oh, yeah, we got it. Nobody was like, you sure you want him to save that?

Again, again, maybe a lost translation between long form and this great. Well, here's what wasn't. Here's a line that thank God made it from that yellow page to the screen. Yeah. Uh, Bill Pullman and Bridget Fonda, they're meeting cute. Oh, God.

The townspears. They're meeting boring. After, after an exchange with that weird girl that comes up and says, I hear there's a monster in the lake. Oh. And then they say, no, it's not a monster comes up and says, I hear there's a monster in the lake. Oh. And then they say, no, it's not a monster. Then she says nothing. It just looks at them and walks off in the strangest way.

Exactly. Like, yes. I think it was supposed to be sexful. It's a weird, like a weird Mary Annette. Yeah. Yeah. That's all. It's also a weird thing.

She's also a Stan Winston creation. That girl. So that Brendan Glee she could be like Whoa That's very erotic He's like turns it. It's like a weird Lenny and squeaky moment for him Even Bill Pooman looked he's bill poem that is Bill Pooman is going her ma'am

Bridget Fonda right and at one point she says if you call me ma'am one more time I'll sue you and with today's laws. It's possible Fuck you Fake Howard Hawks screw ball bullshit written. What are you Aaron Sorkin with this? Yes, it's by a lawyer by a Storkin with this? Yes, exactly. Right by a lawyer. Right by a lawyer.

Right by a lawyer. But, and that, that, that whole sequence is trying so hard to be screwball because she's carrying a can of raid to kill mosquitoes. Now, again, you could use, there's plenty of insect repellent. She's using cock, Ray is cock-roat repellent. Not anything else to just spray in the air. In there, in there.

Like, that joke would have worked just as fine with like, off, any or any other fine-solid product. Something with deep in it. I was gonna say, do you think that it was like an ET Reese's Beatsy situation? We're off with like, we don't want our product in your movie. They're like, no all, we're like, we don't want our product in your movie. They're like, no sweat, we're gonna go to rain.

Oh. Fuck you. Fuck you. And the citronella people couldn't get in the door. Please, we'll give you all the candles you want. What if she can't? Fuck you. Good, I want to tell you something. Please will give you all the candles you want fuck you

Can I I want to tell there's no I want to just play just talk about like weird. Do you say Reese's PCs? Sorry, not on purpose, but that's how it comes out. I say Reese's It's very hard. It's only been brought to my attention recently that it's Reese's pieces. Yeah Are you being serious? I've been dead serious. Yeah, I do the same thing. I think wait. what do you say? Yeah, I say yeah, I say pieces. Yeah, I I Reasons pieces, man. Recees pieces. It makes no sense, but it's right. Yes. It's a back for the PC. They are PCs of Reese's. They don't chop the PCs. Recease, pieces.

Recease, pieces. Come on. Show them, you said, Reese's, pieces. And you're, wait a minute. Wait, wait, wait, wait. House lights. Can I have house lights for one second? Get down a lot of hands.

Who says, Reese's, pieces. How many people go for Reese's pieces? Reese's, pieces. To your logic, to both of your logics, it should be Reese's racist pieces. Recess pieces? Yeah. To your logic, to both of your logics, it should be Reese's pieces. Because at least it's that. Like, he wouldn't be... I understand what you're saying.

And the logic of it adds up. They're called Reese's pieces. Yes. You're right and you're wrong. You're right and you're wrong. You couldn't be more right and more wrong. I wanted to show you a weird thing that Brendan Gleason says in this scene. They're traveling up river.

We're they're gonna be camping. This is when they reveal they're gonna be camping and and they're camping for two days But then when they arrive up river, all the trucks are there, and a lot of people just drove. And they're like, oh, why did you have to camp? It seems like a very accessible spot. Where you commute here? Yeah, and also, why did they have to go up in boats? That's insane.

So they go up in boats? Well, that's insane. Why go in boats when it's easily accessible by car? And you can probably stay at a hotel if it's that accessible by car. And they can probably stay in a hotel if it's that accessible by car. And they camped like it was like a beach party. Oh. Like the camp was set up like a real fucking party town.

Yeah, but they looked like a nudist college. So when he looks at Bridget Fonda weirdly because she has a suitcase. Yes. So like, ooh. It's like, well, yeah, What are you gonna put your clothes in? Yeah. She's like, no, she was camping.

Oliver plaid hat boxes and shit. She just had one roll in there. That's perfectly normal. But meanwhile, Oliver plaidstet has a full desk with novels of profit. Yes. Dresser Drawer. He's got a fucking better apartment

than I lived in a New York city for five years. And apparently wireless internet. How they watching those fucking videos? It's 1999. That's a physical impossibility. So, take a listen to Brendan Gleason's response. Well, I'll point it out. I don't know. I didn't notice until it was shown to me. It's it's breezy Gleason. We're staying intense. Ten? It's greasy glises. We're staying in tents. So, tent? This is it.

This is it. Yeah. Thank you. All right, so it may take a second here, but here we go. Tents? We're staying in tents. I told you, two days we'd have to camp. Yes, camp.

But I thought that meant Ramada in. I never heard tense. Will there be toilets? Maybe we should just take it back. Why? Because I'd prefer a toilet? Oh, God, we forgot to pack a feminine napkins. That was the moment that I wanted. Oh, God, we forgot to pack feminine napkins. And I feel like perhaps that line was written to be sarcastic on his part, to be like teasing her.

Right. But he delivered it like he's very upset. Then in fact, they have forgotten to pack maxi-packed. But even though he's like, oh, are you menstruating? But by the way, even as sarcastic, that's still a valid concern. Like, you know, it's like, it would be like, oh, why don't we don't have sushi for you?

Why do we have to? People can be responsible for their own hygienic equipment. Let's say if you do go to a hotel, you're not like, where's all that fat? I don't think a lot of women are like, well my period's here. Who's giving me something to soft this up with? Man, I have the concierge, please. This is like a... Can you please send some... Ring Ring napkins.

My aunt's low is here. It's a disaster. Can you send up a roll of paper towels and some string? I don't know. By the way, and... Single. And again. And again, feminine napkins.

Why don't you say tampons, right? Like, that would be a whole piece. Oh, please, let's be classed. But this movie, this movie really hates women. The only female characters are Bridget Fonda who's just an object of disgust, right? I feel like the direction given to her for the whole movie was like, whatever your line is,

what you wanna be saying is, oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's set for the part. It's set for the part when her and Bill Pullman are having this romantic scene after someone's head

gets lobbed off. And Bill Pullman is not really phased by that. And there in this ten he's like, you like it here, don't you? You like this? I'm like, yeah, I do. I do. It's a little exciting part of my life.

It's like, oh, weird, the weird moment. But she decided that just at that moment. Up to that point, she's like, this is the worst. Yeah, I don't want to be here. Also, I'm not contributing in any way. Why am I here? She's like, I'm talking, she's like, this is the worst. Yeah, I don't want to be here. Also, I'm not contributing in any way. Why am I here? I'm talking, she's like works in a museum. That's all she does.

Like they want her to come look at the two- I had a mark in that scoundrel. Once her to look at the two. That's a real rake. And he's like, listen, I'm plowing Mariska Hargotech now. Yes. Who is also an awful person in this movie. Yeah.

She comes in to be like, I'm sorry. She's a woman. I'm sorry about you and Adam Arkin. And she's like, you know, and she's like, yeah, I did it. I'm fucking him. We were fucking before you, and now we're still fucking. The heart wants what it wants. We're in.

SVU's going to be on forever. At this, when this movie was made, SVU is in season seven. No, that's not true. You tell me, this is so callable. But the other female character in this, besides Betty White, is the deputy, the deputy manager, who we see her win, all manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager,

the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the

manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, manager, the manager, the the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the manager, the to mate. And she looks like, yeah, I'm in, I'm on board. And then throwing away all of whatever responsibilities I do have

in this weird place, because I just want to fuck this weirdo. And then I know we have a situation with a monster that's killing people. But I am super turned on by Puka Beans. Yeah, and he's in the direct approach. He's dripping in them. Yeah. and he's and the direct approach. He's dripping in them. Yeah And

And then we don't see the logic jump where she abandoned her position as a police officer Even though she's still wearing the uniform to fly his helicopter or fly with him in his helicopter to an undisclosed location To go find they were I think they were part of a team They were teamed up to go and look within the, I don't think she abandoned anything. Oh, you think that that was a sign? Because I thought that yelled at her for going, what the fuck did you do? Why did you run off with him?

Didn't they make a decision? These people were gonna go here, these people were gonna go here, no, maybe not. I don't think so. I don't, I don't know. And then she also had one. I don't know. She's been her being good at her job.

I really want her to not have abandoned her post. Yeah, you're right. These women are really, every one of them is despicable. They are like bella level pointless. Bella from Twilight. Yeah, and you could argue that Bill Pullman's kind of pointless too. If you were to, if you were to like find his journey, what's his journey? He starts off checking out a murder and at the end, he just gives the order to somebody else to kill it.

Yeah. Yeah. That's it. And he works for animal control? Yeah. Is that what he does? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Fish. I don't know if that would be interesting to do just but like, just see like the characters journeys like all the characters They don't go really. Anyone. No one does does anything none of them have any kind of they are all various levels of either law enforcement or like research scientific researchers almost you know none of them have any kind of personal interest in anything you know in anything related

to the crocodile I mean no one's faith by Bridget fond is like This is the beast I have spent my life This is proof that this thing that I've been blah blah blah. No, there's none of it They're like they found a tooth in this thing and she's like this is a reptile tooth She's like I guess I'll tag along until this guy decides to blast me And she's like, I guess I'll tag along until this guy decides to blast me. Like you're not? So you see this gigantic fucking tooth, that's new. You've identified it.

Brand new. This is not a fossil, this is new. You're not a little bit interested? She's not like Ring Ring Ring. Hey, fuckface Adam Arkin. I just fucking found the coolest thing in the world. Yeah. Go eat a dick.

No. She's like, oh, what am I doing here? But this is all stuff. Who was, and not that I'm a proponent for a studio, notes, but this is a moment where a studio could be like, okay, guys, here you go. Why don't we just make Oliver Papi chasing this creature for his entire life?

And they finally, he's a captain, hook. He's captain hook, and this is the crock. Yeah, why not do that? Instead of a guy who's interested in crocodiles in general. Yeah. And I heard you may have a crocodile. And the presumption is what we are led to believe is that all of our plots, a millionaire myth,

he's like Richard Branson who changed his crop. Right, he just isn't an adventure, but what he wants to do is swim with crocodiles. So they can judge him? That's because they all know what it's like. Yeah, because God's, he wants to be judged by crocodiles. That's fucking dumb.

That makes Ken Lines all the way. And then Bridget, there's a set up that Bridget fond and all the other plat know each other. And he's like, yeah, we fucked. And she's like, no, we didn't. And he's like, man, they never remember. Which leads you to go, well, did they? And then, and the fact that they kind of dilute that moment

also goes, why not make them always together? Like, oh yeah, they've had these run-ins in the past. And this is a combative relationship, because she's the researcher and he's the whatever. Nope, nope. Everyone is equally distanced from each other. They all treat what is going on as a severe inconvenience for them. And they never bond.

You know, like, in jaws, they all come to Drifus, Shaw, what's his tips. They all come together and they bond and they get to be on the same team and they get to respect each other Whatever all these guys are like they never figure that out They always don't like each other they always don't care and they always what could be more fun? They're going to the movies to watch a bunch of people who don't want to be there Battle a giant fucking crocodile snooze Battle a giant fucking crocodile. Snews.

And the giant crocodile, who's not bothering anyone? Who is not actively attacking, only with provoking. Just a turtle, dude. And then, and then, with, oh, man, I just, I was like, shit, I was going to, with, uh, Bridget Fonda, they set this whole thing, I hate nature, I hate the outdoors. Why? Were your parents killed by crocodiles? No.

We never know. I'm never in a fucking bitch. I'm a woman, and I'm worthy of your hate and derision. LAUGHTER Because of my period. Yeah. I hope you remember the fact that feminine absence. Why? When it happens, when my moon cycle arrives, somebody will have prepared for me, right?

Otherwise, I'm going to ruin these white chinos. When I watched the end of this movie, I literally said out loud. I was like, I literally said out loud. I was like, that's wait, that's it? Because the movie ends so, on climatic, like I was like, oh, this is like, now they're gonna capture it and they'll be, now, now we'll see. That fucking reveal of the second crocodile

made me so mad, made me so mad. Where it's like, oh, where'd that guy come from? Oh, there was two of them. And then like jokes about, like, yeah, I can count. I noticed that there was another one. That's not making this moment better. You can't just do that.

And by the way, Brendan Gleason has his gun in the beginning. He's like, oh, yeah, this, by the way, if I shoot this guy with this gun, I'll kill it. They go, all right. And then at the end, he beginning, it's like, oh yeah, by the way, if I shoot this guy with this gun, I'll kill it. They go, all right. And then at the end, he goes, yeah, he shoots it. No. Totally fine. Not that crocodile is not an issue.

Nope. Hey. OK, gun. Now what have we got next? This gun is just good as it's word. So dumb. It's so dumb. They also did a thing with Bridget Fundaonda where they basically made her, they gave her like

Alimic Beal level clumsiness. Yes. Where she was constantly getting, she fell off of so many things. So many things, oh yes. The woman can't stand her feet. A canoe, a helicopter, and was oftentimes launched out of her. Yes. a helicopter and was oftentimes launched out of the room. Yes, yeah. And again, no one responded to her being thrown

60 feet in the air from that fucking canoe. What, I think I- What's that awful non-man up to now? She's searching for tampons somewhere. The bottom of that lake. Oh man. But I do appreciate Bill Pullman's after watching that clip. He is apathetic from go.

There isn't a, he's just, but he completely commits to it. It's not like there's one moment where he kind of emotes like, I appreciate that Bridget Fonda like cries and weeps when she sees someone get their head eaten by an alligator. And yet, Crocketer, So sorry. Bill Polen... Bill Polen... Basically racist. I get it. They all look the same, do you, mate? I've been there, bro.

We need to build a wall between all the lakes and the United States. You can't let these Crocles and alligators in. Not in my America! What were you saying? I just appreciate that Pullman kept with his apathy the entire time. He didn't like, this is the last scene I'm in the truck. I should really like, I'm moat my love for this girl and move my knapsack. And maybe the audience will have like a fucking feeling

about the two of us getting together. As opposed to just like, what the fuck is this? You really feel, she was like, you know, I figured what the fucking exact line was, some bullshit line. A beer or something like that. Yeah, let's grab a beer at a bar in Maine. She goes, she goes, what's the matter?

In Maine, you can't make a pass, make a move. In Maine, Maine people don't make a move or something. Right, yeah. Something about his, like, his, basically she, at the end of the movie, she's like, so what's you deal, you're a pussy? Yeah. So, just to be honest,

you didn't, Visa Vee what's going on between us. I'm like soaking wet and you're a pussy. Okay, cool. And yeah, you didn't manage to ask me out in this 24-hour period where a few of our friends are murdered. Was this written before or after David Kelly got with Michelle Fyfer? I really wanted to be while they were dating.

And it was just like David Kelly getting out his hurt feelings basically, not all one. Can we talk about the bear? Yes. Oh, yeah. So one of the bear? Yes. The bear? Yeah. So, one of the lame scares is that this bear burst out of the woods. Like the bear charges. The bear?

Well, this bear, he must have started running so far away, because he's got this head of steam going, where he can't turn around at all. And so, everybody's just like, whoa, that bear. It's like they sidestep this bear, and they're like, exactly what they do, they do. Yeah. They're like, oh, yeah. The bear runs past all of them.

They're like, skid, skid, slams on the brakes, turns around. And it's like, now. Here we go. It's bear time. It's up on a time like, and it's like, ooh, at waist point. You're gonna, you made me so mad by dodging me. You're gonna pay. Maybe the original script was like an animated movie

where you could actually buy a bear from a running like that, but no. Well, but my crocodile jumps out of the lake and eats the bear. And by the way, so this is my thought on that, then that makes the crocodile good. Crockettale saved them from a bear attack. So how are we supposed to feel?

Be like, yeah, you know what? This guy is good. Get the fuck out of here. You could read this movie as the crocodile is the too strong for its own good son of Betty White, who everybody thinks is a monster, but is actually a hero. But it's a Frankenstein story.

You know what, you know what I mean? The townspeople are like, get the monster! And they don't see that the monster keeps saving them. And it's only because they provoke you that it attacks them. Anyway, that's my story. I think we can see this crocodile is almost a boo-radly figure. So it'll boo-radly in the sleepy town.

Well, hopefully like to kill a mockingbird in 50 years, they'll be a sequel to it. Yep. I also love... That's the David Kelly's death. His publisher will be like, well, you know there is a sequel to Lake Clasin. Really quickly, when Alruplatt is a sequel to like class. Really quickly when, when, uh, when, uh, Alruplatt is saying we got to capture this thing, um, and they're like,

no, we're gonna kill it. He's like, no, please listen to me. He says, I, first he says, I know that in, in, in Africa, they have like trapped ones that are over 20 feet long. This one's 30 feet. So why is this insane, right? Yeah. Like if there are already a bunch of crocodiles, roughly this size, this shouldn't be that strange in the end. No, it's not a, yeah. But then he says, like I just tried to talk to him

and to capture him. I know of an empty oil tank in Portland. What? I have food in it. Why would you? I don't remember what that is. That's amazing. Where would you be? What grape remember. No one is. That's amazing.

Where would you be? What grapevine is this filtering through? Like, hey, did you hear? What do you... What do you... We got... You know oil tanks? Yeah, oh yeah.

Yeah. Well, empty your full. I'm getting to it. Like... Whoa. I got oil tank guy. He always gives me all the insights. I scoop I got an apple my phone and check out where I'm near empty full I like the nearest enclosure they could find would be to go to Portland across the country Unless you know

Portland name Portland name Yeah Alright we got this Jesus Jesus Well guys Sorry

Don't mean police Don't worry Don't worry mean police. Don't worry. Don't worry. I'm going to cut a few twinkies in a boat. Don't worry because we'll make you mocksy. When they do transport the crocodile, they're not going to work and you're like Like to me that's the better and scene of the

Family like guys guys there's no such thing as giant blah blah blah blah What the fuck and then a helicopter shot? Oh, that would be great. I would like that more than Betty White to reggae music, feeding baby crocodiles? Why was it that short? Why was it reggae? Why did that happen in the movie? By the way, I was hoping I was like, please, please, please be prehistoric ducks. I wanted to be feeding prehistoric ducks.

Because she was bred. Because she looked as bred and she's getting ducks. But it was getting rough. It was getting baby crocs. And I just wanted to be like, oh shit, the duck's now. There's also crazy ass. So you don't, you just, wait a minute, wait a minute. Okay, so June, so what you're saying is,

that Betty White has access to all prehistoric animals. I thought that would be the twist. She have a land of the lost store. Well, look, we don't know how that got there. We don't know what got on there. She was just beating sleigh stacks. It would, to me, be a more interesting ending than just a little fun.

Oh, there's a million more interesting things we could come up with. Because I'm a store-bucks. Betty White, un-sipped aipped zipper and she was a crocodile. I am in. Alright, let's go to the audience and see what they want to talk about. The audience obviously has some research on this dumb movie, this dumb fuck shit movie. Alright, you sir, your name, your title for the film, because Lake Placid is not a good

one, and your question. OK, my name's Mike. The title is Bears are cooler than crocodiles. And I just curious, why does nobody give a shit about the second crocodile that I killed? Like, didn't it make such a big deal to capture another one? Well, because they killed it immediately. Oh, yeah, it just got fast, my life got fast.

We didn't get invested in it. It's the second-crock guy. It's almost like it was a dumb thing that they jammed in at the 11th hour of this movie that never should have happened. Well, to me, the other thing about that that was so crazy was, they don't even build it up like, wait, how did that crocodile get over there

when we were over here? Like, that's not even an element of the movie. Like, he must be moving so fast. And it's like, oh, there was two all along. Right. It's like just one. He's twins. I'm sorry spoilers for the movie the prestige. All right, here we go, sir. Your name, your name, and would this movie be better with Nicholas Cage instead of Belpulman? Yes or no? My name is Ryan and absolutely. Yeah, 100%. Alright, what's your question?

So it's actually more of an insight. Discussing a branding lease in lines, I wanted to point out that besides the sanitary napkins and the other line are you a mental? I think the best line was when he's walking to the lake and he says I'm not a brain scientist. Well right, sir. Your name, your title for Lake Placid in your question. My name is Sean. I'm a title of the, Lake Placid is a New York, not in Maine.

Long title. Betty White admits to a murder in the middle of film and no one seems to even think twice about it. I think that's because, I thought of that too. I think that's because she's trying to throw suspicion off of the crocodile. Yeah, nobody, but still. What's she, but she admits to the murder, because I think she thinks, oh, they're gonna find my husband's dead body

and think the crocodile did it. So I will admit to the murder. But I agree with that. Because I'm protecting my monster. But I agree with that. That's because I'm protecting my monster son. I get all that. I'll say I bit my husband in half. Yes.

I get that, but I think... Is that a husband's head? No. Who's head was that? Who's the other deputy's head? Who's the deputy's head? Yeah, who's leaning over the... Yeah, okay.

The thing that I think that he's bringing up, which is more interesting is, no one in the cops don't react to that information even if she's covering for the crocodile like oh, yeah, I guess she killed her husband I think they seem to express mild interest in that fact There were a main is very apathetic Well, yeah sure, but that's even like an unacceptable kill like well I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that.

I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. I'm not a fan of that. to restaurant anything else. All right, your name, your title, and your question, here we go. My name's Erica. My title would be Snappers with a Z.

And I like it. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Snappers. I don't have a question so much as an observation. Throughout the movie, they were always asking, where did this thing come from? Where did it come from?

And in the split second, when it chomped off the deputy's head, Bridget Fondo was able to somehow get a good enough look at it to see that it had oval shaped scales. And she looked it up and saw it was like a Pacific Asian Pacific crocodile or something. And they kept talking about how it had to cross an ocean. But Asia and the Pacific. The other side of the country from Maine.

So the crocodile ostensibly had to cross both in ocean and in entirely and cotton. And the Panama Canal perhaps. Do you think you went around the long way? It walked. It walked. It walked. It walked. Well the crocodile came here looking for the fountain of youth.

Oh my god, this movie more as you unravel it, it becomes like, no one tried. That's the thing that I think is, I don't think we've ever done a movie where the writing is sort of like, yeah. Really? Like, wait a minute. Okay, hang on. Yeah. Really.

I think we've done a movie on this show where the writing is not that great. No, I'm not saying that. You're saying where people where they're clearly was not any kind of effort made. Yeah, that's what I was saying. No, it's not. Because you've done plenty of shitty movies

where people were trying as hard as they do. Right. I'm not saying I'm not saying that, like, yeah, there hasn't been bad writing there, but this is like, eh! This is like, this is like, everybody seems apathetic to the entirety of it. It doesn't even seem like a first draft. It seems like what you wrote, and then you're like,

I'll read it back tomorrow and I'll kind of figure it out. Like before, it's like a pre-first draft. It sounds like he was like, David E. Kelly was like, oh, idea for moving. Prehistoric crocodile terrorized this small town in Maine. Sheriff's scientist, the official wildlife. And then first day they were like, okay, so the script is this.

And it was just a transcription of that. Because right now, in yellow, Lee, on the other hand. At the end of the day, this movie is not even scary. Like, they don't even think there's not even a scare, right? Maybe the opening of the movie. Oh, because here's the deal. Here's the fucking deal. If you don't want to get eaten by the crocodile, it's easy.

Don't go to New York to late. Because that's easy. Don't go to near the lake. Because that's the only place it is. It's very remote. So don't go fucking near the lake. Put some signs of giant crocodile in this lake. Giant crocodile, who never goes on land. Don't worry. Don't worry about that. Put some fences up. It's a fucking big crocodile.

So what? I put some fences up. It's a fucking big crocodile. So what? I was just in Florida, and in Florida they have signs like, don't go swimming here, there are alligators. Great, that's all you need. There's a sign. The movie should have been about a sign guy. Whoops, gotta make a sign. How about this?

Tung, tung, tung, tung, tung. How about that? That's more of a character arc than Have been anybody else in this movie? I'm testing that guy. I would have been invested. I would have been invested. Here's a movie. Fade in.

Small town sign maker. Right? This business is bust. Because nobody needs new signs. But now there's a giant crocodile in town. Wait, I got a mid point. I got a mid point. I need to be made. I got a mid point, an act two mid point twist.

You're gonna be giving me something. He puts no walking, no swimming in this thing because of alligators. No, no, it's a crocodile. I was like, oh, I gotta go back and near make my own my side. No. Very good, very twisty moment there.

That's a great movie. It's a rags-to-riches story It's a it's a crocodile water story Then he goes up the Portland fire tonight. Then he goes up the Portland He gets a G gets word that there is a thing in Portland and he can put a fence around that Yep, don't go near that oil tank crocodile And also he can make a sign that says, oil tank empty and available. Oh, and also, everywhere they decide,

there's also tag on there, no girls allowed. Yep. Nope. Can burrito like, burrito. Boy, yeah, burrito, burrito. Burrito, burrito, our gang. Okay, unless you've got titties. That's on the side

Your name Your name one thing you would have done to make this movie better and your question Okay, my name is Cindy. I don't think you could do anything make it better Okay, and oh It's perfect in her eyes It's perfect in her eyes. I want to know why after the deputy gets his head bit off, why Bill Pullman has to state, we're going to need more deputies. Kind of like, you know, referencing jobs, we're going to need a bigger boat, but like that's

going to happen. I like that. We're going to need more heads and a bit enough. It's just one of the many clever, long-hand widowsisms written by Mr. Michelle Fyfe for himself, David E. Phil. We're going to need more deputies. Why are any of these people together? Why, why, why?

And you know they have enough fucking technology to pull up about pan-Pacificific crocodile's. They could have just taken a picture of that tooth sent to the Bridget Fonda. And she probably could have told from the picture, yeah, that's a tooth. Oh, you mean, you mean she held the fucking tooth in her hand, Paul?

She like had the tooth at one point. I'll go check. And was able to say, this is a reptile's tooth. Yeah. Because she's an expert. And could be like, this is a reptile system. And why are the job is now done? Why are they keeping the tooth in the morgue next to the dead body?

Like, why? Oh, yeah. We got this guy out too. Yeah. You want, like, I don't know. And then they're like, oh, you're not going to want to look at that. You're a girl. And she's like, I can look at a dead body. And then they pull it off and it's like half of a dude

and she's like, well, oh. Oh. All right, your name, your title for the film, and you're done. Oh, the Hugh Press of Woman. My name is James. I don't have a title, but I think LL Cool J should have been in this film as well. I mean, do it.

I mean, do it. This is, we haven't talked about the stupidest part of this movie, which is the cow in the helicopter. Yeah, what? Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. Because they say, okay, we gotta lure this,

we gotta lure this crack dial out. And then one of them said, I think Brenda Gleason started casting, like, oh, what? Like Mrs. Curses a lot did with the cow. And they're like, ah, come on, we gotta get serious about this. And they're like, okay, let's do that cow thing. But the way we're gonna do it is not the way

that she's been doing it for years. For years! We're just bringing cow to the edge of the water where the crocodile's legit waiting. By the way, we're gonna strap a cow to a helicopter and let it lightly Dangle its legs in the water like a fucking asshole So that the crocodile can be like oh I hear cow legs

I guess it's fucking dinner time And of course guys I'm here to say for those of you who haven't watched the movie it goes wrong But it doesn't go so wrong because, thank God, that cow got away at the end. We do see the cow. That cow gives the only fully committed performance of the entire movie. The cow is nominated for a golden globe. Uh.

That's the year to Roberto Benini, actually. Sadly, we lost to Roberto Benini. For life is beautiful. Sadly, he lost a revert open eating. For life is beautiful. Your name, your title, and your question. My name is Kasey. Lake Apathetic. Ooh, I like that. In the quick clips that you see the crocodile underwater

with its mouth opening, doesn't even look like a crocodile. It looks like a hippopotamus or something. Before I saw the movie, I didn't know look like a crocodile. It looks like a hippopotamus or something. Like, before I saw the movie, I didn't know it was a crocodile. And I was hoping it was gonna be some like weird monster of some kind, but. You want more, you were unsatisfied that the movie about the giant crocodile was indeed about a crocodile. All right, a valid point,

a point that probably we would not have made. So you wanted it to be like a hippopotamus instead. Or a monster. What if it's just like a war like a gold earring? How about this though? And shame. There's another opportunity for this town in Maine. They could have like a Loch Ness monster situation.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. This is, why are you screaming at me? I said this earlier. I said earlier, this, but I'm saying. Why are you screaming at me? I said this earlier. I said earlier. You are screaming at me. I am excited by our new bitch's opportunity. Yes. The side-faker by the way can be very involved in that

like Torres attraction take a picture of you. Oh, perfect. You're going up to Croc Lake. Right, guys? It's a line From the movie. Croc Lake. All right sir, your name, your question, sorry, yeah, your name, your title, your question. My name is Shane Lake Pullman.

My question was, first off it was, Office or Fuck Meat, which I think had to be, Fuck Meat is the craziest line ever. But why the choice to have Betty White just cost like crazy? What's funnier than an old person doing something? Yeah, that's a classic. David Kelly thing, he always has one eccentric who like just runs their mouth all the time. What a hot ticket.

Like a five-hack vehicle. Exactly, it's five-hack vehicle from Boston Public. It's in Shack or two. I'm not full of the time. What a hot ticket. And that makes it. Exactly. It's Fibish Finkle from Boston Public. It's William Schender. I'm Captain Faisemarri's Law. It's William Schender in Boston. It's the same character. He must have had a crazy uncle when he was a little boy who just said a lot of inappropriate

racist shit and David loved every minute of it. And he can't stop writing that character. Well to me also she's so aggrant, like all she needed to be was a little bit like nicer than play like a little bit dumb like, oh I just live on this like, for a moment, one she's like all right, fuck wads, listen up, you piece of shit.

Also their big discovery is made, and I thought this was, I was like, what the fuck is this about? They're big, they meet with Betty White. She's like, I killed my husband or whatever, blah, blah, blah. And then they leave, then they get on boats, then they drive up the river, then they camp, then the thing attacks, and then they're in the woods and they're like, well, I'll be damned.

And they have set up camp right near Betty White's house. Yeah, where they've already been, and they watch her feed a cow to the crocodile. I forgot about that. Is that how this is being done? They're a, they just coincidentally end up at the same place and see her committing the crime. Yeah, I hated this movie.

There was also like a weird piece of like movie making stuff too, where they're having that party and it's night time, but through the trees. Do you mean the Tom Jones party? Yeah, the Tom Jones party. That's like, no, it's sexy. Bada. Okay.

The music in this movie, terrible. Every choice, terrible, terrible, terrible. I mean, that being said, it's a great sound. Try it, please buy it. Well, I was going to describe that there's like, it looks like nighttime, but you can see through the trees that it was daytime. And I don't know if that was just a gaff,

or they just couldn't fucking light it, or I don't know. Or nobody cares. Yeah, I don't give a fuck. I mean, they rip you like fuck it. Shoot it, shoot it. All right, two people next to each other, your friends, I imagine, right? I don't give a fuck. I wouldn't be surprised. You should have like fuck it. Shoot it. Shoot it. Alright, two people next to each other, your friends I imagine, right? Who has the better?

Who has the better question? Alright, double head or go. Here we got. I want to break up a friendship over this. But you can't answer any here. Go. Question. My name is Maddie and I'm...

And I know, I'm care. Shut up, question! I want to know your question. Question! Let me try Friend 2. Question. Just anyone think because there was no chemistry between Bill Polman and Bridget Fata, the actual romantic arc was between Oliver Platte and Brenn English.

Yeah, totally. Friend 2 is a man. How's that feel, Maddie? How's that feel, Maddie? Is your question as good as that? Friendship is good. How's that feel, Maddie? How's that feel, Maddie? Is your question as good as that? I know we touched on sequels a little bit, and there are actually three. But my question is that there's actually supposed to be a crossover that's happening between

Anaconda and Late Placid. Sure, why not? I knew it was announced in 2013. between Anaconda and Late Placid and Zachary Knoe. I knew it was announced in 2013 and probably it's probably still in post. That's a great idea actually. I'm on board for that. Yeah, it's all 5 minutes. It cost 35 to make, it made 31. Yeah. And they decided to make three more.

Oh, it was a... You could probably spend less money if we cared, even less. You know how we've done it? We can use a lot of the same shots of the croc. This is the... I have to make... What I love about this is this is a... It's Lake Placid 2, Lake Placid 3, Lake Placid the final chapter, and then they announced

that Lake Placid versus Anaconda. Which is funny because it's Lake Placid versus Anaconda. It's not like Freddie versus Jellum Street versus Jason. It's like Crock V. It's like Crock V. Snake. Halloween. It's a holiday versus, crock, crock, be snake. It's not crock, be snake. Halloween. Ooh, I hope.

The holiday versus Freddy Krueger. I hope John Void is in that movie. This is directed by the director of this directed a movie that I really want to do in a live show. We're talking about it a few times. He directed the movie Soul Man. Oh, you're in that movie. Love it.

Love that movie. See Thomas Howell overdoses on Tanding Pills and becomes Black. Yes. Yeah, so that's the, he went, he did Soul Man. Totally normal movie. And then Friday the 13th, two and three. And then forever young, that Mel Gibsonth, two and three.

And then forever young, that Mel Gibson, romantic, Mel Gibson movie. Real varied career for this director. I think he also did a lot of episodes of Chicago Hope. I think that's where he and David had. I'm assuming hatch the plan on set, Mandy Patanken was throwing a fit somewhere. And they were like, chalk it out.

Well, Mandy Patanken was like, in his trailer, not coming out, chalk it out, you see. Well, man, if it was like in his trailer, we're not coming out, they wrote this in those moments. Nine minutes. That was a joke. I was like, hey, I bet I could write an entire, I bet I could write an entire movie on one-buck slip. I bet I could write a whole movie on the back of an envelope. And like, the Lincoln of Screenplace.

Obviously, we had an opinion about this movie, but there are other people out there that had a different opinion. It is now time for second opinions. Second opinions. Second opinion. Second opinion. Write in your face.

These are five star reviews pulled from Amazon. And. I'm sorry. Yeah. This almost seems impossible to me. By the way, there were a lot. No! A lot.

More than I was expecting, a lot, a lot, a lot. And I'm trying to pick my favorite ones here. I will also tell you that this is one of the few movies that I've gotten tweets about on our... How did this get me Twitter account? Where people are like, how could you do it? It's a funny movie, and it works.

Wow. And you're like, it's a comedy. And I actually started getting like, I was like, did I fuck up? Did I pick a movie that's supposed to be funny? And it's in, and I'm like, no. So you did the opposite of that. No, the opposite of that.

Yeah, this is not a funny, like, no, I'm in the movie. No, let me get in your head, Paul. Yeah. Don't you doubt yourself. Don't you let those Twitter heads get in your head, bro Fucking Twitter head you tweet classic Twitter heads. All right, so this is a from Dorthy Munoz and she writes I had forgotten the exact storyline of Blake Placid five stars and I mean what great movie can you remember the story, too? I've forgotten the storyline.

In fact, I'm not sure I've seen it. Five stars. By the way, by the way, this is all in caps. I had a great show. No, please read it as shouting. I had forgotten the exact storyline of Lake Placid. And I think this rendition is a remake. I don't recall Betty White being in my video.

I did enjoy it. She's a hoot. I a little enjoy singing it again and again as I go through my growing collection. So there's so many five stars. There's so many things going on here. I remember it as being the story of a heroic US Olympic hockey team Where were they more crocodiles than I recall I put this on because I love the love story between Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock

I don't remember Betty White or the crocodile, but they seemed cute too. This one also written in all caps from Carrie Walker. This one I swear I'm not changing these in any way. We love this movie, movie with an I&G. We love this movie and get all the moves out on weekends. And we walk the moves. We have all of them. We love moving and get out all the moves on weekends.

And walk the... That's a teacher. And walk the moves on weekends and walk that's a teacher I want to read all of that person's other reviews You got to walk the moves I got to walk those moves Go walk the moves Guys, what did you do last night? I walked the move I love moving I walked a move. I love moving. I walked a move.

From the Net A. Harrod, Jr. to Net Rights. And Net Rights. I like this film so much that I rented it three times in two months. And since the only letterbox releases on DVD, this film made me break down and finally get a DVD player so I get on a copy. That was written in 2000. There was no movies. Nope. No, no, no.

No, no. No, no. Um, oh my gosh. Uh, okay. There's two more I gotta read. They're so good. Gerhardt, Gerhardt wrote, it got right to the point and that was a good move. This is one of the year's best films behind Star Wars Episode One.

Wow. Wow. Wow. What a disappointing year. Did this guy check the date? Did he write it to get it read on this show? No, I do that. I checked that all the time. This is written February 2nd, 2000. One of the best of 1999. One of. One of.

He was Magnolia and Lake Placid. This one is from Josh and Josh from Louisiana, all in caps again. I saw this movie in the theater. It was one of the best movies I've ever seen in my entire life. Very scary. You will jump. The plot is great. The old woman is hilarious.

I wouldn't even rent it. Just go and buy it. Amazon.com rules. And don't forget to rent slash by Deep Blue Sea. Wow. Wow. It was also an extremely good horror movie. Nothing funny about a shark that tears people up faster than you can blink your eyes, five stars. Jeff Bezos wrote that. I'll see you in 2015 at Largo, I know the future.

I know the future. I know the future. And we don't often do this. We don't read the bad reviews, but there is one that was so bad, it's such a long one. I'm just going to read the last line of it from RM3 1D. This is one of the robots. I guess it should be read in a robot mode.

I believe. I love that it's C3PO. GJR's later. I love that you chump your robot voice of choice is C3P. It's Anthony Daniels. Oh robot voice Anthony Daniels. I have to say. All right, this is the best line in this. So I leave you with this request. If someone holds a gun to your head

and orders you to watch Lake Placid, let him shoot you. Trust me, it is far more humane than having to sit through this unforgivable and uninhibited romp through cinematic hell Make God have mercy on ourselves That sounds like something see through PO would say My gosh

Do we anything else than anyone would like to cover that we have not talked about that we get it all out? We've done a pretty good job. Yeah. I don't think that we even have to go around and ask people if they would recommend this movie to watch. I think the answer is pretty apparent, yes. Yeah, there's really nothing in it that's even fun, bad. It's just, and I think it's also because it tried so hard to be, well, didn't try so hard, but it thought it was so funny

and it was, that takes it to a different, horrible place. There's something about earnestness when it's not good, you can still find some enjoyment in that, but when somebody's trying to be funny and they're not, it's like, that makes me understand heckling, right? Like because heckling comes out of a weird anger that people have when they see someone on stage that is not their sense of humor

and they're like, this is driving me crazy. I got to ruin this. They don't think that. I think this is driving me crazy. I've got to fix this. I think it's a 50-fifth. Yeah, maybe.

But so I understand that feeling of like when somebody thinks they're being funny and they're so not being funny, it's mad name. When Oliver Platt gave that speech about how when he was a kid and when he was trying to sympathize with Breng Leeson about how his deputy had his head bit off and he said, you know, I had a dream when I was a child, that whole run which was for laughs. I stopped it.

I stopped the movie and like took a walk around my house That made me really really there was a lot in this movie because I will say This movie is full of legitimately terrific actors. Yes, like this is a cast that is very Like solid actors but beyond capable and great in other movies. And specifically, where I was like, I feel so bad for these people. I feel so bad for Brendan Gleason right now, because what a tremendous actor he is.

And he is, he must be like miserable. But he knew, I mean, he accepted the job. He knew he was getting into. He read the script and was like, Yes, I will go to the main. He's but I have a feeling they were like it's David Kelly. Yeah. He's so hot right now.

It's going to totally revamp what the horror genre is. It's going to have fun with that. We're really poking fun and everyone's like yeah yeah yeah and then they all got the script and like wait what this is a legal path. So I just want to make that I can't read this and everyone got a different legal bad. Everyone did a different one.

He wrote the movie 15 times for everyone who was in the movie. And that's why it's so scatterbrained. That's why Brendan Gleeson's is like, mine says, I think you are a mental. Discursing that. And Kelly's like, I don't know. I've been up writing for five days.

There's a coffee ring on this, so I'm just going to take my best guess. One of the taglines for the movie was, Who cares? Lake Placid. Who cares? Lake Placid. Why bother?

Lake Placid. Are you bad with money? Lake Placid. No, not that. Lake Placid, are you bad with money? Lake Placid, no not that Lake Placid, a fictional Lake Placid. Lake Placid, uh? Lake Placid, I wouldn't either. From the creator of Ali McBeal. Finally, a horror movie that's not scary or interesting. Link Placid, we're getting granite countertops.

Link Placid, it's a movie, but not as long as a movie. Long as a movie. Oh, Paul, you have a brand new podcast coming out on Ear Wolf on April 1st. That is correct. And now you have, can you tell us any of the people that are coming up in it or anything like that, or tell us a little bit about the show? It's called Spontaneous Nation. It's an improv podcast. Everything that happens on the show

is completely in the moment. Nothing is prepared. I improvise a monologue at the top of the show like I did on the POTF Tomcast, my previous podcast. I have an interview with a guest that's inspired by a blind question that's provided from the previous guest.

And then we've been- From a blind person? Always from a blind person. Right? Always from a blind person. Right? Always from a blind person. They've got questions too. Now, Paul, the one request that we have gotten here on the show numerous times, and I feel

like we should do, we've never done it before, but people really would like you to come on the podcast one time as Warner Herzog. And we would do a, maybe like a bad lieutenant to port of call. That movie is amazing, too. I mean, it is amazing, too. Love that movie. That movie is fantastic. And I would do it in one second.

Yeah. Ooh, you know, while we are talking about movies, we should definitely do that movie. And I think we should definitely do that. We should do it in maybe a live show. The question that I would really should definitely do that. We should do it in a live show. The question that I should ask all the time, because I get this all the time, is, face off.

Now, you don't want us to do face-off. No, I will yield. We can do face-off. I will just argue my point that it's a terrific movie. Just the way Evan Goldberg feels about Deep Blue Sea. Exactly. Now Nate, you have a great podcast right now, which is over on the Wolf Pop Network there.

Yes, called Reading Allowed. It's a reading series of actors and comedians come in and read comedy essays and the sort of dramatic essays as well. And there's an interview section where I talk to actors and sort of people of note musicians about their reading habits and their writing habits and their sort of like creative process. But we've had great guests.

So if our Amy Mann was on the first episode, it was wonderful. It's a great podcast because it gets some of your reading done for you guys. Yes. You pick these Fantastic pieces and they're varied, you know, there's comedy pieces. There's dramatic pieces and there it's fucking great It's a calls me really generous too because I have this monthly book club where you read a book and then you listen to I have three or four friends

Sit down and talk for an hour about the book whether you like they're not and Paul's done two of those which were really fun I feel like that's the best thing too because you can join a book like then there's no hour about the book, whether you liked it or not. Paul's done two of those, which were really, really fun. I feel like that's the best thing too, because you can join a book like, then there's no pressure of the book club. You can be like, I'll listen to that podcast when I finally get to it. You don't have to be like, that pressure of like, where everyone is in a book club.

It's like, yeah, yeah, I'm in a book club, and then like two days before that fuck. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, like cramming it. And then you get there and you talk about the book for five minutes and then it's like, oh, what is Sally wear, oh, did you see Lake Placid, oh, I loved it and then you get there and you talk about the book for five minutes and then it's like, oh, what is Sally wear? Oh, did you see Lake Placid? Oh, I love this. More shardonnay, please

Well, and so that's I do have a shardonnay podcast that I do want to plug So definitely check out reading reading aloud Jason, well, you want to talk about You want to go to plug shard right. You want to plug Shark Cast? I got to plug my Shardcast. And it's me and a couple of friends. We sit around with a bunch of Shard Nays. We get into them.

And what are you finding in the Shard? What kind of Shard do you like? Oh, something light and Chris. Do you like buttery? Oh, yeah. With like, tannins, like some oaky flavor, oaky earthy. You could be blueberries.

You're the youngest person on the podcast, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's me and four-old women. Divorcees, right? Divorcees. They're gilves. I was going to call out the gilf cast. And you're doing a live show in Woodstock, New York, right?

Yep. An old converted barn. Yep. Woodstock, New York, Nantucket. We're doing a whole thing. Oh, I, you have one in the middle of the day. Yep. Where we just do a bunch of yoga, we drink a bunch of shardin' egg, everybody gets fingered, it's great. Um, I'll plug, I'm on this season community, I did a community. So that's gonna be on Yahoo Soon, so please watch that. And am on currently right now on the show called fresh off the boat on ABC

Which is a super funny show? I think and you can follow us at how to this well at HDT GM on Twitter after you get all the updates All right, thank you guys so much for coming out the vlogger tonight To Avril Halley, Nate Kallie, July, DS. Everybody here at LaGuardia, thank you so much. Have a good night, bye-bye. You're the only one who can't hear you