How Did This Get Made? - Matinee Monday: Monkey Shines

Episode Date: January 29, 2024

A murderous monkey, a classic 80‘s sex scene, animal monologues, and the Tucc. Monkey Shines has it all! In a special Halloween episode, Paul, June, and Jason discuss the monkey cam, mom sponge baths, whether Alan was running to school with bricks in his backpack in the beginning, and what exactly “monkey shines” means. Plus, everyone tries to figure out where the allegedly cut brain surgery scene fits in the final cut of the movie. (Originally Released 10/29/2014) UPCOMING TOUR DATES IN: San Francisco, the UK, & Ireland! Go to hdtgm.com for tix and info.Pre-Order Paul’s book about his childhood, Joyful Recollections of Trauma, wherever books are soldFor extra Matinee Monday content, visit Paul's YouTube page: youtube.com/paulscheerHDTGM Discord: discord.gg/hdtgmPaul’s Discord: discord.gg/paulscheerFollow Paul on Letterboxd: letterboxd.com/paulscheer/Check out Paul and Rob Huebel live on Twitch (www.twitch.tv/friendzone) every Thursday 8-10pm ESTSubscribe to Unspooled with Paul and Amy Nicholson here: listen.earwolf.com/unspooledSubscribe to The Deep Dive with Jessica St. Clair and June Diane Raphael here: www.thedeepdiveacademy.com/podcastCheck out The Jane Club over at www.janeclub.comCheck out new HDTGM merch over at https://www.teepublic.com/stores/hdtgmWhere to find Jason, June & Paul:@PaulScheer on Instagram & Twitter@Junediane on IG and @MsJuneDiane on TwitterJason is not on Twitter

It's like single white female, but with a monkey, we saw monkey shines, so you know what that means. Now it's time for How to Discapade Gonna have a good time celebrating failure, not just be a hater Could you know you wonder how to discapade? Let's all win the mediocrity of subpar art Perhaps we'll find the answer to the question, how did discapade Hello people of Earth, and welcome to How Did This Get Made?

I am Paul Shear joined as always by Jason Manzuchus. How are you, Jason? I'm good, Paul. How are you? Very good. And June Diane, Rayfield, how are you, June? I'm doing great. How are you, Paul?

I'm very good. Guys, this is the first time we've ever done this. No guest on How Did This Get Made. Fuck guests, bro. Fuck them! We don't need them. Fuck those guests. We want to apologize.

Sorry for this episode being late, but ultimately deal with it. I mean, really. We're doing the best we can, guys. We're trying. We're doing the best we can. And speaking of someone who is doing the best that he can, I want to give a shout out to Harrison Freeman.

Harrison Freeman designed Our How Did This Get Made T-shirt. It came to my attention this week that we never actually credited our How Did This Get Made T-shirt. It came to my attention this week that we never actually credited him for the Daredevil T-shirt. So if you're wearing a Daredevil T-shirt, how'd this get made one? It was Harrison Freeman. He's an awesome guy and if you're out there,

I don't know, as a guy who hires freelance artists, maybe you wanna look up Harrison Freeman. And if you're just wearing a regular Daredevil T-shirt? Fuck you. That's what you're gonna do. Whoa! Not fuck you, to June, fuck you too. Wow. The Daredevil T-shirt? Fuck you. That's what you're gonna do. Whoa! Not fuck you to June, fuck you to the Daredevil t-shirt. I can't believe you just said fuck you to June. But that t-shirt, it's still for sale in our shop,

so go buy a piece of that wonderful artwork. Americana, I call it. Wear it on your stupid bodies. All right, so let's talk about this movie. Oof. movie. I Just watched it. Um, I want we watched it on Saturday This movie is long definitely long. Oh is this movie long? It takes a long time There is a full hour of setup one hour of setup one hour setup and it plays like a drama

It does play like a it plays like a movie that It does play like a, it plays like a movie that you would watch on Lifetime about. It plays like a Lifetime movie. That's what I thought that too. That's so funny. Yeah, because it's like. Ah man, we're guys, we're all the same. We don't need these guests.

Fuck guests, man. I'm looking at the empty chair right now. Fuck that guest. We should just take pictures of the empty chair and put them on the Facebook page. So yeah, no, I felt like the beginning, first of all, the moment, there's two things that I knew were weird right from the top.

First of all, that disclaimer about no monkeys were injured in the movie, but also monkeys can do everything you're gonna see in this movie. It's like a double-edged warning. That's interesting. And then we are introduced to our main character through just waking up out of bed and then doing like a naked stretching.

Just. Loved it. Loved it. What? I gotta say, I loved the whole first hour of the movie. Like. What? What?

What are you talking about? I know it was insane, but I thought it was really. You was boring. I thought, see, I actually thought it was really compelling this guy. Well, I thought it was insane, but I thought it was great. It was boring. See, I actually thought it was really compelling. Wait, what? This guy, well, I thought it was really sad too, but I thought it was a compelling story,

like this guy who needs this monkey to help him. The man is perfectly fine. And sort of saves him from depression and suicide and really saves his life. Well, see, and I've also, I have worked with animal actors. Yes, I have worked with- Oh, animal actors, okay. Animal actors, I worked on animal practice,

and I saw the relationship between that monkey, who's also female, and her handler, and there is something that happens between a monkey- And their handler. And their handler, and there's this sort of like, well, look, this is a lot, I'm going all over the place right now. Is this something you know about like monkey, the monkey actors, monkeys, monkey relationships? I don't know, I just know from the field. Got it. I just know from my own personal experience with

monkeys. Which is like a very extensive. You did a couple episodes with a famous monkey. A very famous monkey. From the hangover. The hangover monkey. Yes, exactly. So I did think it was a very interesting story to tell and I thought, wow, this is well acted and I'm listening. I did want to ask you, did you find the monkey's performance credible? Yes, I did. Wow. Well, I think those monkeys did a great job. I mean, look, if we're going to talk about the monkey in this movie, this capuchin monkey did an amazing job. Now, there's a lot of conflicting reports here. Some people say it was one monkey, but.

Well, it's credit, it is one monkey in the credit. Right. Boo. But other people say that they've used up to six monkeys in this movie. So we don't know. Now, just in the part of Ella or? In the part of Ella.

No, yeah, not all the, Ella didn't play all the monkeys. The movie takes a turn once like we head into the monkey cam perspective. And like that's where things get so crazy. Can we just set up just for the audience for one second? Set it up. If you've never, so if you haven't seen this movie. I'm still blown away.

I did in the end. That you loved the first hour of this movie. Well, we're gonna get into it. Which I thought was almost unwatchable. Really? Yeah! The opening of the movie, we basically, the movie goes out of its way

to show a healthy, vibrant man who on the, on, he says hello to everyone in his neighborhood. And as he's running down the street. Jogging with a backpack full of bricks. Which I guess you do as a professional jogger runner. I don't know if he's professional. I think he might still be amateur.

I don't know if he's gone pro yet. So, you know, he's bag full of bricks, but the bricks don't even really pay a part in it because basically- They don't pay any part in it. A dog just- They pay an enormous part in it. Because they are used as the device to show

that he is broken. Because the brick falls in slow-mo and shatters under the ground like his body. And the brick is broken because as he's running, a stray dog runs out, barks at him, causing him to run off the sidewalk and get hit by a truck. And the worst low-budget truck hit of all time.

You see nothing. You see nothing. All you see is like a close up of a truck, like bumper or fender, and then just some noise and then you see that great, great thing. Actually, that's interesting, knowing what will come to know that it was an animal that caused the accident.

Oh, look at that. Yeah, that's right on theme. That's interesting. So it's an animal that undoes him and it's an animal that brings him back. That's right. Did you guys notice that the first hour of this movie or pretty much the time? Was it unwatchable? Yes, I noticed that.

Thank you. The movie, it looked like a set of like a Neil Simon play. That's so weird. It looked really setty. Like it was a Broadway set. The hospital. The Tooch is loose in this one guys. The Tooch is loose to is I

I'll tell you one thing that you clearly the two twos improvising because Like they're going into surgery. He's supposed to be this real cocky. Oh, yeah He's like hey look at this guy's hairy ass, but Than yours to the nurse yeah, but two seconds before we saw this guy that very clean ass. Very smooth ass. Well that's why I think, well, what we'll get to is like, I am trying to understand,

did he have something against him? Did he botch that surgery because he was threatened just by how? What, a physical specimen? Yeah, I mean, I don't know. Alan was, I don't think so. I think he's just like a cocky asshole, you know, God complex doctor. So you think he did the best he could and acted as a doctor.

But he's not paying enough attention because he's doing these back surgeries all the time. Right, and even ugly doctor says he did a totally competent job. But he might have overlooked this other thing. Because he's too busy banging that sweet poom. He's too busy fucking. And now he's got a hard on for Northern Exposure. Oh, by the way, all right, so this is the thing, like, you know, he gets, obviously, he's broken, he becomes a paraplegic, he comes home with a nice big...

Which, by the way, let me just say, that is a fear of mine, that like, and that's why there were things about this movie that played upon specific fears I have in life. Like see, so. You will have to be taken care of by a monkey. Not that one, but that I will be yes rendered. Yes, oh of course. Powerless and also that doctors are not being respectful in a circumstance like that.

That doctors and medical professionals are being glib and careless and casual. Yeah, because that's the thing is when the tuch comes into the operating room, he's like, is he out? Great. We got a real dumb, dumb guy hit by a car. He's like being really glib and disparaging towards our hero. And I have to say that people really turn on him the minute he becomes a paraplegic. Like his girlfriend, Northern Exposure, super track-a-girl. What was her name on Northern exposure do we remember her name is Janine Turner but like she was she also does that Christian yoga now what she's

in Christian yoga she's super super Christian now and she was a spokesperson Maggie thank you she is the spokesperson for like Christian yoga which is basically like hey Christians we can still do yoga. It's not like a demon practice. It's okay, we can do yoga if we want. We just have to put our attention towards God. Not like the demons that the yoga people worship. Yeah.

Those horrible yoga demons. Yoga is not religious. There's a whole infomercial about it. It's pretty phenomenal. Oh my gosh. Wow. So she, I questioned her motivation too because it seemed to me that she decided that the day he came home was the day she would leave him

She hasn't been to the hospital. She says bear by the way that that is the way it's treat it's treated though He's died. Yes, like in that that homecoming for him is treated like a wake But and I also found it very strange that nobody went to go pick him up at the hospital. Yeah, the van drops him off and is like, there you go pal, you're a quadriplegic. And by the way, dropped him off in a neighborhood where I was expecting like poop from the wire to pop out. I was like, where does he live?

It's like, it looks like a suburban ghetto. I don't know why they did that. Like I don't know what we were, what was gained from like knowing he was, I don't know. I don't know why they did that. Like I don't know what was gained from like knowing he was, I don't know. I don't know either. He, well, I feel like one, there's a couple of things at play.

He is the son of a wealthy family because they pay for all of his everything. I didn't put this together either. He's the son of a wealthy family. What does the mom do? She has some sort of a business. That she sells off to come take care of him eventually,

but she spends all of the money hiring the nurse, outfitting the place with all of the handicapped showers and all that kind of stuff. And he's like, my mom must have spent it for her. I feel like he's a wealthy kid who's like in law school, slumming it because he's gonna put himself through law school, he's not gonna take his parents' money. Well, he certainly didn't put any of the money

in the design of the house, which he just had like random Jamaica and Barbados posters. Like they took from a traveler. Tourism board. Who puts those up? Who'll give us free posters? Tourism boards of any country will give you a free poster. He loves, because I didn't quite get a,

here's my thing, I don't have a handle on this character. The main character, I don't know really what he does I don't know law school. Okay, so he's on law school, but his personality What type of law does he want to practice like it? Did he animal? Oh, right? He goes to law practice. No, you see I thought he goes I thought that he decided to go to law school After the attack. No, okay. He is in law school. That's where he's running to in the beginning. Oh, no No, no, he's just running for exercise. No, he's running to class not with a brick with a backpack full of bricks He's studying masonry. That was his project

He was he was taking a class on construction and he had to bring in a show in town and he had to bring in his show in town. He's not running to class with a big piece full of bricks. I thought he was a runner. I really thought he was a runner. You thought he was a professional. Yeah, because they only showed all those pictures of him running around. That's amazing.

Well, he, okay, okay, okay. There are a, it is a little difficult and misleading. He is a runner. He is a runner. We meet his coach. Right, runner. We meet his coach. Right, yes. We meet his coach at the house. He by the way says I was his coach.

Yes. People have given up on him. And we also meet his law professor, that stern looking woman who talks to the church. Okay, so he is in law school and is apparently on the running team, I'm assuming. We've only gotten to really the first five minutes. Yes, oh my god.

But I agree, so professionally he's in law school, his hobby is running. Okay, we don't know what law he wants to practice. No. We'll type it a lot, okay. Oh my god. Would that make a difference? But I agree with you.

I actually think it could have, yeah. He is a real empty vessel. Yeah. There's no character beats for him beyond like he is hit by a car and now he has a beard and by the way I have to say the best monologues of all time this guy monologues more than anyone and they're filthy Angry well that's a play a couple of that's eventually though. Yes. That's the monkey talking. I actually do think that we're supposed to think he's a little bit vapid that he's like

on top of the world a little bit. And he's, you know, got this beautiful woman in bed. He's in law school. He's a great runner. Like he, I think they were making the point of he doesn't, he doesn't have. He's had no hardship. Yes- He's had no hardship. Yes, he's had no hardship and so he is a little bit

of an empty suit. But it's a horror movie, right? So you would think that like- Is it a horror movie? Well, I mean, it's classified as a horror movie. It is, I guess, I mean- Is it a morality play? Not really because he's done nothing wrong.

Well, that's the thing. You know, like he is a truly like a victim of catastrophic circumstance. Yes. He is not, it's not coming to him, it doesn't seem like. You know, he's not owed this karmically or anything. Yeah. No.

But the monkey also is a product of circumstance as well. Oh yeah, no the monkey. Okay, so now we can, now we need to explain. Yeah, let's forget get into the monkey. So there's one person who doesn't show up at this homecoming. Correct, and now we are introduced to... His brother?

No, his buddy, I think. His buddy, John Pankow. John Pankow from Mad About You. No, I know John Pankow, but from, how does he know this guy? Oh, I think they might be in school together. He's in the science department, and he's in the law department.

Oh, he's at that school. Yes, yeah. So John Pankow is doing something, and I wrote down here, confused about what he is, I have no idea what he's doing, he's just injecting freeze-dried human brains into monkey's asses? Yes, but he's also injecting something into himself.

But that's only to stay awake. That's just, yes, okay, that's what I thought. Okay, so he's juicing himself. There's a lot of injecting going on, which was confusing. And he gets a brain, he's like, we got this brain, and then he seems to have frozen it, and then is shaving it off like a truffle.

Yeah, like truffle shavings, I know this said too. And then putting it into a syringe. David Chang would have a blast with some frozen human brains that he could just lightly shave. He was supposed to be the guest for this, but he got so excited that he's getting human brains. This was meant to be a culinary episode.

So yeah, so he's injecting human brains into monkey's asses, which I still don't understand. By the way, I did have a question about that, the shaving of the brain. It's like, is the brain at that point is just an ice cube, essentially? Yeah, he like freezes it. What is he?

But you're not gonna get that. Those brain cells aren't gonna go into the monkey. Like, that was my issue. Like the brain cells of the science. The science trying to, what he's trying to do is make the monkey smarter. Right. That's it.

That's it. It's just, it's an experiment to make the monkey smarter. That's it. That's it. It's just it's an experiment to make the monkey smarter. And his genius breakthrough discovery is that if you just inject brain stuff into a monkey's bloodstream, it will get smarter. And then that at the root of it, I don't know much about science. It's the Steven root of it.

Steven root, first performance in a movie, this movie. The first performance? Yes, his very first performance was Monkey King. Well, then he was very good. Actually, I have to say the acting, for what these people had. That was really good. I was talking to Pat Nosswell about this movie,

and he described this movie as a product of George Romero's one bottle of vodka a day addiction at this point. Like he was drinking a bottle of vodka a day at this point when he wrote and directed this film The movie feels like and and the movie feels to me like two different movie ideas mashed together Yes, which is because it's based on a book. Oh Interesting. I want to ask a question about that human brain. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah was this where did they get that brain?

Because I thought at a certain point, okay, because I thought at a certain point we missed something and this must have been the brain of like a serial killer or something. No. Or a prison brain. Which would make sense because. Well, let's be honest, it wouldn't make sense.

Oh, it would make total sense. It would at least be a line. Like, what's that? It wouldn't make sense in the sense of like, it still wouldn't add up to a movie that makes sense. What was that movie? But I would understand that there's a murderous brain on the list. Wasn't there like that movie where it was called Body Parts,

where they cut off people's hands? Like, I got a hand of a spoon. What was that? It was, I think it was Body Parts. It was Body Parts, right? And it got, it was released at the same time that the Jeffrey Dahmer stuff came out and they buried it real quick. The, uh, but here, but, so he's injecting it and Stephen Roots like,

what do you do to these monkeys to be smarter? But I don't quite, I mean, I don't even really believe that was this monkey getting smarter? Because it seemed like the monkey was just doing... So basically, long story short, John Pankow goes to a monkey farmer, they trained monkeys to be paraplegic helpers. He's like, hey look, my friend's paraplegic. Can you take one of my monkeys and get him involved with my friend? Which again, doesn't make sense because is he still doing the research or is he helping his friend?

Well, yeah, no, no, this is, I do think I know a little bit of what this is going on because what he says is, oh, John Pankow. Yes. It's worth watching this movie just for the very lengthy scenes in which John Pankow is in a lab talking onlyankow. Yes. It's worth watching this movie just for the very lengthy scenes in which John Pankow is in a lab talking only to monkeys. Yes. He talks out loud.

Primarily, yeah. He's all exposition. He's saying everything out loud and acting his balls off because he's acting against nothing. And I think he did a good job. He did a great job. He did a great job. It was a great job.

I was watching that. Like he literally speaks for 20 minutes in this movie to no one to know no one Okay, and handles it quite well. It's better than Tom Hanks and cast away anyway He he says You should be super smart by now to the monkey. He's like why aren't you smart? And then he has this idea he thinks oh Maybe you're smart because you're still only around other monkeys doing monkey stuff

Maybe you need to be out in the world. And so he has this idea wherein he's gonna kill two birds with one stone. He's going to get this monkey to help his friend because any monkey can help a friend. Like the monkeys, the woman is training just regular monkeys. So his idea is I will do that and I will also secretly

have my agenda going on. Jason, you're wrong. No, he's right. No, he had a one track mind there. He never cared about helping his friends. Really? No, yes he did. Then why train the monkey with a woman at the farm?

He loves his friend. Like, remember, look, if you look no further than the scene, one of the best scenes of the movie, in my opinion. Sex scene. Well, second best scene. Where he just in my opinion. Sexy. So, well, second best. He just eats her pussy for like an hour. That was amazing. That was amazing. Did we pull that?

You know, I wish. Because I pulled it, nailed it. The basically after the guy tries to commit suicide before he has the monkey. He tries to commit suicide by suffocating himself on a dry cleaning bed that is just hung over his head. He like wheels himself into position and then must just like breathe deep. That's it, just hope that hope.

That seems flawed. But anyway, so basically they go to the hospital to see what's going on and then oddly, the doctor, Tuch, is now dating the girl from Northern Exposure. And uh... That's a blow, that's a chuff blow. Oh yeah, yeah.

Yeah, that's got a sting. Tuch kinda swooped, swooped in and then... Swoped in, swooped in. Swoped and then swooped. Swoped and swooped in. He was swooping and swooping. You wanted to try it then? Nope, not at all.

Tuch, the Tuch, swoped and swept in. Swapped in, swapped in. And, and grabbed this girl, he's like, you know what? He was like, paraplegic, I can't do it anymore. I'm gonna do the deed. Oh, and he looks good. He's walking around in a towel at one point.

Oh yeah. And he looked, the and he looks good. He's walking around in a towel at one point. Oh, yeah. And he looked, the tuch. The tuch was loose. The tuch has got hair. Looks great. His body is ripped. This is not the lovely bone's tuch. This is a younger tuch.

This is young. On the prowl tuch. And they. Have we said that it's Stanley tuchy yet? I don't think we've made it clear. We're just calling him the tuch, which I would like to do for the rest of time. The Tooch is loose.

Gets a real comeuppance because, well, it gets snagged into him, but John Pankow calls the girl from Northern Exposure a clinical cunt. Yeah. One of the best lines in the movie. I think that's right. Maybe he did want to help his friend.

It just seems like. Yeah, I think for sure it wanted to help his friend. But then later on, and I don't want to jump ahead. But he also wanted his monkey to be exposed to humans to see if it would get smarter, which spoilers for this movie it does. Yeah, but here's the thing. It does get smarter, but the paraplegic monkeys

were already doing the same job that this monkey was doing. Right. But see, here's the thing that he's. So that's why he's acting selfishly. He's acting selflessly to help his friend with a monkey selfishly because it helps his experiment to expose his monkey to the friend. I understand that, but my question is, but the monkey... Okay, so take away...

I guess my question is, if you take away everything that we know, and just this is a paraplegic, with a monkey helper, is the only difference is that we only know that this monkey is smart because he's going out and killing people? Oh, and also the monkey is learning fast. Okay, so you're right. I think you're right though because if this was really his intention to sort of, I mean, this is what's weird about it, is that it's not like he's checking in like this is some trial and seeing how the monkeys do it. Yes, he is though.

When? He keeps coming by and injecting the monkey at the house. Yeah, he goes like, hey, you want a beer? And then he goes, grabs the monkey and then jabs in the mask. I know he's injecting him, but it's not like he's observing how smart or not the monkey is. Well, no, but he's saying, like, it's almost, remember, he says, like, she dials the number.

We installed this yesterday, but she seems to know all the phone numbers already. Oh, OK. I see. Like, he's collecting anecdotal evidence about how fast the monkey is learning. Here's the problem with the movie. He's lying to the dean that the monkey doesn't exist anymore.

So my thought is, at the end of the day, what was the major plan? I have no idea, and why not just tell him? He wants to test it. He's a rogue scientist. But why not just tell your friend, like, hey, by the way, this is what's going on. I have this monkey.

Because then the movie wouldn't work. Well, here's the thing. I believe that there's something wrong. There's something missing in this movie. Something is cut out. They've said here because here's the thing that makes no sense. And I'm jumping a little bit ahead

because there's so many things to talk about. But the monk, at certain points, our lead character has monkey teeth. Yes. And he is drooling blood. This is the pa- he's not drooling blood, he bites his lip in the lips. Okay. That's why he bleeds.

But there, what is making, what is, the leap that is missing. Yes. Is, okay, I understand why, because of the human brain injections, the monkey is getting smarter because it's being exposed to humans. And it's understanding what the man is saying and it's doing much more complicated things than this, that and that. That I understand. It's smarter so it's better. What I don't understand is why they seem to have a connection that is when the man

dreams he's seen life through the monkey's eyes. And there's another question too is why does both that happen? Why does the man see the monkey? Why does the man have monkey teeth? Why does the man have monkey teeth? And also, why does the monkey seem to know what the man's darkest desires and like darkest- And it makes him angry, yes.

Instincts are. There's somehow sharing something, I feel like. Well, that's it, like I feel like- And we do share an evolutionary bond with monkeys. Go on, Paul. Well, not to reference this. I don't know if this is actually real science, but I saw on an episode of Happy Days when the Fonz went to-

So it is. So it is real science. Fonz went to a castle, some sort of Dracula castle. And they sucked the cool out of him. And we knew that because his thumbs wouldn't go, hey, hey, they would go down. And then they went to someone else and his thumbs went up, hey, hey, so they transferred the cool to another person. I feel like that's the thing that we were missing, the fawn's machine. Well, I think this is, okay, go ahead, Jim. Please, someone find that.

What's interesting though is that I don't know if we're trying, if the movie is positing that human instincts are actually terrible and murderous and that animal instincts in and of themselves are pure and you know Good because once the monkey seems to become more human he becomes a murderer Yeah, right. Well, I think that yeah I think what's happening even though it's not well explained, is that the monkey is becoming more human and the human is becoming more monkey. Like, he's unable to control his emotions. He's angry. He's like, almost like a primate.

He's like territorial. He's got monkey teeth. Uh, okay. You know, like he- But the monkey teeth are sometimes there and sometimes not. The monkey teeth make no sense. sometimes not the monkey teeth make no sense Yeah, the monkey. Why does he have a good idea? No idea who cares? I bet George Romero is like she put his teeth in Then the monkey I mean, I don't know that's just so weird the monkey wants revenge Here's what I'll say just so we can put some context the monkey travels a lot of distance

Oh, yeah, should we hear that when the monkey travels, we're in a monkey cam. Can we hear the monkey cam music? The monkey cam music is pretty amazing. Here, take a listen. I have the CD. So this is just basically monkey cam. It's like a GoPro running through the streets.

And the monkey gets distance. He runs out to a cabin in the woods. By the way. Here's the weird thing, though. where was he going all those nights? Well, he was going out and killing people. Yeah, he was killing people. No, no, no, no. I know when he was killing people, but like, there were many nights where he left and he was just roaming through fields. Where was he going those nights?

Fucking just like getting shit done. Shouldn't the, but the brain cells shouldn't make him quick monkey errands I gotta go pick up my dry cleaning. I got it. Oh, I gotta go throw feces. Oh shit Here's just something to put it in context a Ryan the studio which Romero was working with recut the film against his wishes and they Contribute they say that's what and made this a failure. Because earlier versions of the film, allegedly, we don't know this would be true, contained a bizarre brain surgery scene, as well as several abusive scenes involving the small monkey.

They were deemed too graphic to include in the final cut, but I do have a picture of that brain surgery scene. I can't see that. That's the brain surgery. So he's clearly, our main guy, Alan, is getting some sort of brain surgery, which I don't know. So that must create the link with a monkey. But how did he do that against his own will?

I thought the link with a monkey happened when the monkey ran up to Alan and started licking the blood. Chasing him on the lips? Yeah, licking the blood that was, okay, I'd say so. We got it. Okay, I'd base up. We got it. We're off the set. Wait, so was it the monkey going down on the girl?

No. Yeah. No. No, because the guy's not going to do that. Yeah, that's what a monkey would want to do. Monkey would want to do it. Monkey would want to get in. I heard that they also could have seen where the monkey just jammed it in.

Just jacked it. Just jacked it. Now just making June just uncomfortable. Okay, sorry, go ahead. Okay, so basically this monkey becomes murderous and as the monkey becomes- It expresses his murderous desires. Yes, right?

So first person up is the nurse. It's the parakeet. Oh, the parakeet. This is a great, yeah. Because the nurse for no reason is really abusive to Alan. Which by the way I have to say, if I'm a nurse and I'm working in this situation and a monkey comes in to do most of my job and I can just sit there,

I feel like I'm happy as a clam. Like why would she so? And clams notoriously happy. Like the happiest single valve organism on the planet. I just couldn't pet a clam all day. Doesn't do anything to hang about. Oh, dude, it's so good. Why was she so upset?

We had such a good weekend. June was happy as a clam all weekend. Well, here's the thing. When we first see her at his homecoming party, she's sitting in the background reading a magazine. Yeah, she reads a lot. She reads a lot. This nurse has pissed.

It doesn't seem like she wants to do anything from the get-tell. It seems like the nurse is like, oh, you paraplegic. You're such a bother to me. I have to do all this stuff. Like, that's part of the gist. Right seems like the nurse is like, oh, you paraplegic, you're such a bother to me. I have to do all this stuff. Like, that's part of the deal. Right, but the monkey comes in and does the majority of her work. And then she's jealous of the monkey

and their relationship, but yet she has a shit relationship with him anyway. She does nothing. She's a terrible person. We're supposed to not like her? I get that. Well, she's supposed to be a villain so that it makes sense that she deserves what she gets,

but it doesn't add up. Like, it's just terrible writing. I did think it was really inappropriate for her to bring a bird into a working environment. Don't bring a parakeet into a house. By the way, that parakeet at one point gets loose and just starts attacking Alan's face, and Alan can't move his, that was actually the most scary.

Like, oh God, it's like. Can you imagine? Can you imagine a bird trying to peck your eyes and you simply cannot move? And then she comes in and acts like it's his fault. She yells at him and so the monkey's like, you don't do that to my master. I'm going to get back at that parakeet. So the monkey sneaks into the parakeet's cage late at night and breaks its neck and then leaves it in the nurse's slipper, which is kind of like his FU to the nurse. Oh, he's like shoving bananas in her slipper. And the next morning, when

the nurse comes down, I want to play this clip of Alan yelling at the nurse. We get the first taste of Alan's kind of rage because then like, you know that basically the nurse is like that monkey killed by a parakeet is impossible here take a listen Killed my bogey! that's the bird Mary Ann I think you're confused not with his hands he had a little demon do it for him Ella was in her cage I don't know how you did it, but you did it. But two of you together.

And now my little bogey is gone. Maybe it was old age, huh? Maybe it was a rat that got it. He doesn't sound like this in the movie, normal. Yeah. When you jam your foot into that slipper, who gives a shit? It deserves to die., it deserves to die. It fucking deserves to die.

And these, this is the beginning of the animal monologues, which I cannot get enough of. I cannot get enough of these animal monologues. This is when his character, it almost is like, he's an empty vessel until now, because then he changes into like this angry, yeah, you're right, monologue it almost is like, he's an empty vessel until now, because then he changes into like, this angry, yeah, you're right, monologue giving kind of like, almost like chewing up the scenery, kind of like bad guy in a way.

Cause he's got fucking, I don't know, monkey brains in him or something. Well that's the thing, we don't know what he has. We don't know why this change is happening. It's not clear. But yet he seems mad every time the monkey kills somebody. He's like, ah, god damn it. Like he's mad.

And he's also like he's trying to be like, the monkey did it. And everybody's like, this is what bothers me. Everybody's like, what are you talking about, man? The monkey definitely didn't do it. Except that John Pankow should be like, maybe the monkey did it. Yeah. Maybe the stuff I'm giving the monkey has made the monkey do this. And Pankow's like, fucking relax, bro. Can I get a beer? He's always getting that beer. So the monkey then goes off on a murderous

rampage, kills the Tooch and but now- kills Northern Exposure, Maggie from Northern Exposure. But now he's seeing it in his sleep. Yes. So he's seeing the monkey but yet he, is he the monkey? Is he controlling the monkey? I don't know if he's controlling the monkey or if he's just along for the ride. Because the monkey would have no idea how to get to that farmhouse. That's what Once Your Face keeps on saying, the monkey rescuer. She keeps on saying like, you didn't do it. It's not you. You know, Ella did it. And tries to like distance him from the monkey, but if he is having these dreams at night, I do sort of think he killed those people.

No, I don't agree. I don't know if he can stop Ella or just see through her eyes. So he's just along for the journey. Certainly, he is culpable in the sense that his desire is what caused the monkey to go and do it. That's like, you know, he wanted it and so the monkey went and did it.

The monkey is like a, almost like a Frankenstein monster. But can we break this down and go, what is happening in this movie? Because like, this is too many questions to have. Oh, is it? Yeah. We just hit the critical mass of questions. I think like,

That's where we're at now. I just feel like you're making a movie about a man and a, cause here's one version of the movie. The monkey is jealous and a protector of the man. The single white female mold, which is, get it. And I like that. Then there's the other mold of it, which is they are somehow connected

and the monkey is doing the man's bidding. Cause he is without a body and the monkey has a body. Right, great. But it seems like we fall purely in the center of both of this. And what's difficult is it doesn't start to grapple with any of this until over an hour into the movie. I would argue it doesn't start to grapple with it until after like the first two murders. Yeah. Which is almost at the end of the movie.

Which is like an hour and 25 minutes in. Until they go to the farmhouse where all the other monkeys are. And then they get that sweet pussy in his mouth. But by the way, this woman who I love, Kate McNeil, who played Melanie Parker, she was great, but she also came in a little hot when we first meet her. She's the monkey trainer. She comes in, she goes, oh, I guess you're the paraplegic because you're the only one sitting down.

Like, whoa. Nailed it like let's let's maybe like no you know what the zingers the paraplegic she's gonna be like she's showing him that she's not gonna treat him okay you like that that's good because it was like she's just not you know she doesn't care this man just tried to commit suicide because he's a paraplegic and this woman's coming in going like you can't get up you know people are being so delicate around him and so weird. She, I thought, I also thought she was terrific. She was great.

Yeah, except for that seduction scene where she starts to like seductively unbutton her shirt. Yeah. And then it slow cuts to them like doing it and her shirt is still on. I thought that was a bizarre choice too. But by the way, that sex scene reminded me of the 80s in the sense it's like, that was a long, by the way, someone wrote down here, the one of the select group of films

to ever show quadriplegic sex. Oh yeah. Yeah, it's not a thing that happens often in film and they went for it. I mean, they really, that was a very passionate. Yeah, they were truthful to what was possible. Yes. Yeah, I don't know all the possibilities, but I imagine that's-

Well, I think you can imagine one. Face grinding has got to be one of them. A good old quality face grind. But now here's the question. If you're a woman, she's motivating the face grind. Like he didn't be like bring that up stairs. She's riding his face like it's a saddle. Yes, and I thought she handled it beautifully.

Yes, she did. By the way, I didn't like that. I was nervous about that scene. I didn't know what was gonna happen. Well, I thought he was gonna get upset and I just didn't know what was gonna happen. He was ready for her. It almost seemed like she had done it before.

Well, she clearly has. Had the apparatus. She has, no, she only has the apparatus. I thought that too, but then I realized, oh, she's training all the monkeys and stuff for all this apparatus to be around. Well, but I also think she trains the monkeys in this set, another set, like a three-walled set.

A barn, the barn set. And she's like, you can live out in the barn, in the barn set, and that's where they have it. They like you can live out in the barn in the barn set and they That's where they have they have and the monkeys kind of hooting holler as they're doing Yeah, the more they fuck the more the monkeys go wild because monkeys are so fucking horny And then I mean it wasn't bad it wasn't bad Wasn't bad for like a sex scene in a piece of shit horror. I thought it was great Now the movie is getting seen in a piece of shit horror movie. I thought it was great. I was just kidding. I was just kidding.

Now the movie is getting clocked in here, because now things are happening. The monkey has a mind of its own. Well, now we're just cramming stuff in. Yeah, now it's literally. And here's the other. The main thing that he figures out now is that he has a shot at walking again.

Oh, right. Well, this seemed to me, by the way, like something that was done in reshoots. Because you could take them out so clearly, like basically, cause it's like in the middle of the movie they go, oh by the way, chances are you'll be able to walk again. Those scenes are so specific,

so easily took out and they seem like they were shot on the same day. That's interesting, I wonder, I wonder what the purpose of that would be. Because I think they wanted to make it a happy ending. Because I feel like, it feels like they couldn't leave him in that chair at the end of that, and you got your powers back.

Interesting. Because those scenes are so out of the norm. It was like, what motivates them to seek a second opinion? Yeah. You know, and it's not the path the movie's on, really. Well, when he does find out, I would like to play, again, I'm gonna play two more of these monologues. They're so good I'd like to play the the monologue when he finds out you're right though Paul

I'm sorry to interrupt you because the reason why he goes after tuch is because you think they change that because right now It's because the tuch didn't you know? But may have botched the surgery Well, that's part of the reason he goes after the tuches. No, he goes after them because of the girlfriend. Both. No, they're in the van and he's like, this fucking guy. So angry. So they go home and they call the tuches and the tuches aren't there and they're like,

he's at this number and they give him the number of Maggie from Northern Exposure. Yes. And then he goes to bed angry. By the way, what assistant would do that like, hey, I'm going to go on a private vacation this weekend. But if anyone calls for me, give them him my private beach hour my private woods cabin number but if the guy whose ex girlfriend I'm blasting calls you know what put him through to here is here is Alan's monologue in the van one of my favorite

monologues second favorite monologue Wiseman that motherfucker That mother fucker. That self-satisfied son of a bitch. If he did this to me, she'd put me through this for no fucking reason other than his own incompetence. Alan, don't waste your time on anger. Son of a bitch. Eagle fucking, man. I don't understand this reaction. You're letting the bad news overshadow the good that there's hope, Alan. So that is Alan and Alan is basically doing a Marlon Brando impression.

Here's the thing that I found really funny, but he's so cursey. He delivers fucks and shits, and the final monologue is one of the best. I don't wanna spoil that just yet, but he is also, there's all these posters around LA for this TV show. I think it's called like Chicago FD or Chicago PD.

This guy is the star of that show. This guy? Yes, Chicago PD. And the tagline is, don't fuck with my city. Like, and then it's like the fuck is like, exed out? Yeah. And I was like, what was the most aggressive billboard? Because it's like, you see fuck on it?

It's like just like a CBS show. So it's like, and it always struck me as a- He shit ass hole Tuesdays at 9.30. And it always struck me shit asshole Tuesdays at 930 and it always struck me But now and I know that this is the guy doing it. I'm like 100% by that's a fuck you fucking huge piece of shit You fucking light fires in my fucking city fucking kill you you big garbage Other times when we're also just in his head While yeah, I'manting and raving. No, I think it's all out because she's like,

I don't like this change. Yeah. But meanwhile, I think that's the only time it's kind of justified. Like you find out that the doctor just kind of like Calcine- God, you said too. Well, that's the interesting thing is like

if he now has a monkey brain, it's really not like a monkey to have these. Well, that's the thing is he's not getting injected with monkey brains. No, but when he kissed that monkey, I don't know what happened. Oh, there. Hey.

I don't know what exchange of fluids. These are like these kind of scenes of his like angry outbursts, you know, like curse laden monologues, all this stuff is then juxtaposed with in one instance, a scene where his mom gives him a sponge bath? Yes. Which is so funny. Most upsetting part of the movie is when the mom

goes to answer the phone and just leaves him. And he's just stuck in a swing. Hanging him in a sack. Nude. That's what I'm saying. This movie is, that was really dark to me. Like, it brought up a lot of weird feelings. I didn't like his mom.

His mom also dressed like a, like a, like a, like like, like a, like a, like a, like a, this is how I think his mom dressed like, if you were to dress up a robot to be like a mom, like from the fifties, like she was wearing like these very frilly outfits. She looks like the robot from the Jetsons. Yes. Yeah. She had some sort of like frills and stuff.

Like she did, she did not look like a human person. The way her, whatever her wardrobe choice was, I did not get behind it. There was definitely people in this movie that appeared to be in a horror movie, the mother being one of them. I thought there was gonna be a shot of her turning around or something.

Weird and fucked up. Her performance was calibrated to horror movie bloat and kind of craziness. But it was unwarranted because she only gets killed by the monkey. And you don't even get to see it, he just kills her in the tub. Yeah.

I don't even know, he electrocutes her. Yeah, because she's like masturbating in the tub and the monkey comes. But she was masturbating, I don't think she was masturbating in the tub. Whatever. Tomato, tomato. So can I just,

I wanna give you guys a little test, a little Q and A here. So according to Variety Magazine, 16 titles were tested. I'm gonna read you, this is like to see what America would respond to. Obviously, monkey shines in experiment and fear. See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil, was the one that was listed.

But here are the titles. I'm gonna give you four of them. You tell me which one was not a title that was tested. Was not a title. Okay. Okay, you ready? Ella. Monkey master.

The primate. Monkey see, monkey do. Which was not tested. Which was not tested. I'm gonna say... The primate? The primate? Ella.

Both of those were tested. Monkey master was the made up one. Monkey master. Ella, the primate, and monkey see monkey do. Monkey see monkey do might have been the best title. That's the best title for sure. By the way, what does monkey shine mean? No idea.

Yeah, what does monkey shines mean? Is that a phrase that that I don't know This is one of those things that I'm just like oh, I guess that's a thing I don't know what it is and I'm not gonna I'm not curious enough Well to me I was thought this is like a Stephen King novel like that's my shining. Yeah, like yeah like monkey shining I wonder if it was like subconsciously trying to be like it's like the shining but with a monkey Okay, I'm reading this so it says monkey shine is a US coinage dating back to the early 19th century, meaning a prank or trick or boisterous behavior.

It's one of several English words or phrases that draws parallels, usually not very negative between human and playful, simian behavior, monkey business, monkey around, more fun than a barrel of monkeys, monkey see monkey do. All being a monkey sound alike. Got it. Okay, so basically, monkey shines, you may land on probation at college, or it even may cost you your job, but you're unlikely to land on the slammer from monkey shining around.

It's used in this sarcastic sense to mean serious ethical or legal violations. Do you guys have a, do you guys think that Ella was doing anything with the human brains that a regular monkey couldn't have been trained to do? Yes. Such as? Murder.

Murder. Run to a cabin, light it on fire. Find where people are and murder that. Yeah. That would say that was probably the big one. Oh, I'm sorry. Premeditated murder. Not accidental. Premeditated murder. But up until then, you think all of the stuff she did at the house,

any old monkey could be trained to do? Yes, but. Any old like intelligent monkey. Yes, but I think what we're led to believe is that she is learning much faster, his needs and wants, and is able to like, like the example is that phone thing,

where he says we just installed it yesterday and she already knows everybody's phone number. Like I think she's just, whereas the monkey trainer says it takes her months and months and months to train a monkey to do all these things. You know? Well now let's talk about the end. All right, so the monkey kills the mom.

Wait, wait, did we finish about the sponge bath? I'm just kidding. Now the monkey somehow, the monkey also wants to fuck this guy. That's the thing too, because the monkey is killing everyone in this man's life and he's now going to try to kill his new love interest. She's. Right? That's a net. Yeah, no, it's saying she. Well, that is the thing that happened. Oh, she, you're right.

And this is what I was going to say is that monkeys can imprint on their... Like Twilight? Yes, like Twilight on their male masters and not like. Oh my God, and this monkey's name is Ella, like Bella from Twilight. Whoa, guys, prequel, prequel. Guys.

Did Stephanie, what? Did Stephanie Meyer write this movie? So basically, but again, it doesn't make any sense because he's killing everyone who's mean to him, or really just slightly inconveniencing him. No, I think the monkey, no, no, no, the monkey. He's also gonna kill the woman, I'm sorry, I can't remember her name, Mel.

The monkey also wants to kill Mel, which is the point where we realize like, oh, Ella is no longer just taking his darkest thoughts and acting upon them because he doesn't wanna kill Mel. Right, that's true. She is now like deciding. But all the other murders are murders of, oh, well the monkey also at one point wants to kill him.

Remember it holds a razor blade to his neck? Yes. I don't remember. Yeah, the monkey gets real close to him because remember he was shaving the being, oh don't give him the razor. Oh and the cut and the monkey is like obsessed with the blood from the rate from the shaving too. I remember that happening and being like, was something gonna happen there? Well then, oh but then this is, but okay so then the guy also does this at the end when they're getting crazy. Like he's like, he fucks the monkey right? Yeah.

But at a certain point at the end, like when they realizing the monkey I mean he can't but the monkey just sits on his face for a while When they realized the monkey is going crazy like he literally goes like this He's like okay. I got control the monkey. Let me go into a trance, which is like the new information Like the like he got forces himself to go to sleep It's like in Game of Thrones when this This reference is going over June's head. Where Bram is, because he's a wog. A wog? What?

I don't know that. Yeah, a war. Or something. He is able to take over Hodor. Yes. You know, it's like that. He tries to go into a trance in order to see through Ella's... But that's the first time we're hearing of that.

Like, did he... He's like, oh yeah, yeah, I can control him. Oh yeah, yeah. This is all under, I can do this. Which again makes me believe that there is a connection. But wait, I have a, go ahead, Jim. No, I'm just saying we haven't even talked about the fact that John Pankow at one point takes... Not monkey brains, but human brains. Yeah, he injects himself with the monkey serum.

Oh, yeah. So that he can see, because he tries to... Oh my god, I was just gonna bring this up too. Okay, so at a certain point, when everybody realizes that Ella is the threat. John or the Ella might be acting where John Pankow takes Ella back to the lab and tests her and is like then he's saying Ella this is one of his monologues he's like oh my god Ella you're smarter than half the people in this hospital you're smarter I should have you doing my work instead of me doing my work

Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba the monkey is now testing off the charts for intelligence. Yeah, but he doesn't understand what the connection stuff is So then he's like I'm gonna inject myself with the stuff so that I can see you while you see Alan But that makes no sense because it's like But that's like so my question is Like basically what it should have been is, we took a little bit of Alan's brain, oh, maybe this is the plot. We take a little bit of Alan's brain,

put it in the monkey, so the monkey knows everything that Alan's thinking. Yes, I bet that's the brain surgery. And that's the whole thing. It's not the Jane Doe's brain, it's Alan's brain. That makes total sense. Makes total sense. He's like, okay, we'll put, and that makes the movie make way more sense.

100% that's gotta be right. Because like, if you, because you're part of your, you're basically a big guy. So John Pankow, this is what the movie probably was. John Pankow comes to him and goes, look, I figured out a way to do something, to give you back your body. I'm going to take a piece of your brain and inject it into a monkey. So the monkey will be part of you and be part of it. So you can be able to control it with your brain.

My? And then, and then, and so that's how they have the shared knowledge of everything. I think you're probably right. I think only, only because Alan seems oblivious the whole movie. Yes. I think Pankow somehow did it without Alan knowing it.

Gave him a brain surgery? Somehow he needed brain surgery or something happened in the accident and so forth. And you still believe Alan is a friend of his? Yeah. No, you see, that makes it more, to me it makes it more. Maggie from Northern Exposure called and is like, where are you? That's his introduction. No, I know that's how he's introduced,

but I still think that he's sort of the... Oh, he's certainly a Dr. Frankenstein type character. You know, who is, cares about his experiment. You can at least admit that there's nothing... I will not admit it. But, June, that means... You will never get me to admit it! There's nothing about this character that's redeeming.

He doesn't care about his friend at all. No, but I think it's because of re-editing, because I really do think he was like, I wanna get my friend's legs back, this is how I'm gonna do it, the monkey will be part of him, and that's the experiment that's gone wrong. I think you're right, so I think something is wrong. Because that would be the only reason why he would inject.

Oh, not if it's online. Oh, you look at that. Yeah, and it was not, they don't know exactly what it is, it may be lost to. That would be my guess. Because that makes the most sense, because he would inject himself and then he would all be connected by the brain.

Then why doesn't that happen? Doesn't it? Yeah, what happens to John Hanks? He just kind of freaks out. He's just kind of in the red light like flipping out. But I think they could have cut that out. Maybe it was that the other stuff he's been taking, whatever speed that is.

You think there's maybe some. They didn't mix well. Well, he's been up for many a day. It's like taking a Xanax and a Valium. Exactly. Like you can't do that. So he's been up for a while. Now, here's a, so basically everyone's dead.

It leads off to the final face off between the man and the monkey. And you think it's tense. You think it's a tense moment until the monkey pisses on Alan. And I want to play this. This is, this is my favorite monologue. This is what I've been the monkey pisses on Alan. And I want to play this. This is my favorite monologue, this is what I've been leading up to the entire time. This is the pissing on Alan. Here we go.

Get away from me! Get away from me! Get away from me! That's the piss. You slime. You slime? You filthy monkey. You filthy monkey.

You filthy monkey. You filthy monkey. You filthy monkey. You filthy monkey. You filthy monkey. You filthy monkey. You filthy monkey. You slime. You slime? You filth. I'm gonna take you apart. I'm gonna rip your fucking eyes off. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart.

It's amazing. This monkey has killed his mother. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna rip your fucking eyes off. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna rip your fucking eyes off. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart.

I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. I'm gonna tear you open and chew out your fucking heart. It's amazing, this monkey has killed his mother, his friends, he's killed everyone, and then when the monkey pisses on him,

that is the breaking point. This is what I wanna do. I wanna pull all the music out, I wanna pull everything out, I want utter silence, and then urine. I just wanna hear the stream of urine on him. And then the best? Also, by the way, is disturbing at this movie.

You slime. You filth. It's like a Brett Gellman character. That woman, Mel, she's somebody who loves monkeys and is rescuing monkeys or whatever she's doing. It's like, they're acting as though Ella's this way just because she's this way. Clearly, something's very wrong with this animal.

He is the animal. Right, but I'm saying like everybody should be alerted and people should be. Who? The authorities. Who would you call? Well, he's always trying to get people to do it. Animal control. Some people are behaving as though this monkey is terrible.

Well, no, they keep trying to tell John Pankow we have to do something. He keeps being like, I can handle it, I can handle it. Remember the monkey like slashes his hand with a razor? Yeah. And he's like, I got it, I got it. Right, I guess what I'm saying is just it's not the monkey's fault because the monkey is this way. Okay, you're such a monkey, I apologize.

Yeah, you really are. You're not. Look at me, June, the monkey is a murderer. The monkey killed Maggie from Northern Explosion. June is not making eye contact with Jason right now, she's just drawing on the table. I will tell you this much, but this is the best ending of all movie,

like of any movie monkey death, any serial killer death at the end of a movie. The man then pulls a Mike Tyson and chomps into the monkey because he only has only hands. He's the only weapon. And he just basically just bites into the monkey's neck and just whips it back and forth like a rag doll, which it probably is.

And that's, he basically kills the monkey by ripping into its neck. The bat, I mean, I laughed so hard. Because he laughed. He's so fucking hard at that. What you have to understand though, is that like his mouth can bring pleasure or pain. That's fair.

Yeah, and basically you don't want to thank God what's her face, didn't see it. Mel didn't see it because she might never have sex again. By the way, this photo of him having brain surgery, he's wide awake for. Yes. Yes. So that defeats Jason's theory. That's how all brain surgeries are. By the way, you can see this photo on yourwolf.com.

It's fine that he's having brain surgery this way. It's just if he's awake, he knew exactly what was happening between him and the monkey. Yeah, that's true. I don't know then. That brain surgery picture brings up a lot of questions. Yeah. And he calls the monkey fuckface.

So anyway guys he He swears like a child writes every other swear word. Yes It's like some of them are just like you fucking cunt and then some of them are like you slime You you fucking rotten trash. Oh, yeah, right. Yeah, right. He keeps it clean He keeps it clean. Obviously we had an opinion about this movie Oh, there are some people who had a second opinion Here we go, are these are Second opinion songs we do and you why not why don't people send us more second opinion? You can send us a second opinion song. We'll put it right in the show. That's it.

Now there are only four, four, a second. Four five star reviews of this movie. Total, this is a big, this rarely happens. One person, Charlie Tipson just wrote the poem that's on the poster, which if you have not heard the poem on the poster. Once there was a man whose prison was a chair the man had a monkey They made the strangest pair the monkey loved the man

He climbed inside his head and now as fate would have it one of them is dead That's on the movie poster. It is. Yes. That's the rhyme. You know how we're gonna sell this movie poetry Now that by the way just interesting thing. That's a five-star review And that's the only review that Charlie Tipson ever posted. Okay here's some Monkey Shen reviews. From a purely animal training perspective this movie is brilliant. Romero did a great job directing these six ten pound Capuchin monkeys to look like one monkey did the job. Much harder than Lassie and Flipper the editing was very slick. Watch the movie from a technical POV and see if you can find the different monkey faces, bodies and puppets

used in the more intense scenes. I trained them all and I was very proud of this film. But I gotta say that's also the problem I have with them crediting only one monkey because it's a sort of group effort. Well no, it's not even that it's a group effort. It makes these monkeys, it makes us think that like's a group effort. I train them all. It makes this one monkey, it makes us think that one of these monkeys could go crazy at any given time. Like monkeys could be murderous or there's some danger as opposed to-

If you've seen the Planet of the Apes movies. What happened, which is that he's been completely fucked up by people and human beings. Well, that plays in- Wait, the monkey actor or the monkey in the movie? The monkey character. But I'm saying by only crediting one monkey, it makes us think that there's...

This is uncomfortable, because I think what you're doing, June, is you're filibustering. Because June's going to be releasing a monkey podcast on Earwelf. It's just in support of monkeys. There are monkey rights. Monkey rights. And I feel like you're using this as a soap box right now

and we want to stick to what we're talking about. I do want to ask. You understand. Yeah. So you would rather that the part of Ella had been credited to six monkeys so that we understand that one single monkey could not have done this performance, because that's impossible.

Because the performance is too nuanced? No, that's not what I'm saying. Oh, wait, but I don't understand. I'm saying there was never a point in this movie where it seemed to me that the blame was put on John Pankow and that the blame, it seemed like the movie was really blaming Ella and creating this sort of psycho monkey. And my point is there is no psycho monkey.

The monkey's being a monkey. And has been a monkey. The monkey's not even being a monkey. Well, the monkey's not being a monkey, you're right. But the monkey was being a monkey until it was injected by this horrible thing by a human being. And so by crediting one single monkey, we're sort of led to believe like,

oh, we're kind of misdirected into thinking one monkey did that whole role, and there is this monkey playing this character, where the truth of it is there were several monkeys just being trained to do these things. But wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, you think that the people are gonna leave the theater blaming the monkey?

No. Wait, that's your take away? Is that like subtle? But it's subtle, but it's like really? We gotta get rid of Boo the Monkey. The monkey's too dangerous. It knows too much. He's an actor, he's an actor.

But by the way, I looked in as IMDb, he did not work again. So, but- Boo the Monkey? Yeah, Boo the Monkey's, I have an IMDb page. Now, but wait, June, what is your, wait, so you think- It's a subtle point, but I'm just saying. It's a subtle point for us.

I don't even understand it. For the movie. Well, I don't understand it. For us, because I think it's dangerous to put this idea out there that like animals or like one single animal could just go crazy when especially in the context of this movie, there were horrible experiments done by people to animals.

And the animals behaved accordingly because of these experiments. But wait, but there are, but. So I don't think anybody is saying though that the monkey was typecast because it is a murderous. The monkey. No! Like you would be like,

Charlie's Theron is in a serial killer, but we credit her for playing Eileen Wernher. Fine, but when you just credit one monkey, it sort of perpetuates that idea a little bit. Okay, let me ask you credit the lead character James Bond to Daniel Craig But all of the major stunt work and stunt scenes was done by a number of other men who handled all of that Would you have the same problem? That's a great question. Thank you so much. I pride myself on my questions Well, I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna swing it back around I fall on blu-ray I'm gonna I'm gonna bring it around to something a little bit more,

I think you maybe appreciate this more. Friday the 13th. Oh, yeah. Jason. Now, that's a bad guy because James Bond's a good guy, right? Sure, great. And this is what we're, so Jason obviously is played by, you know, multiple stuntmen, right, at certain points.

So now, but we credit one person as the lead Jason. Whenever a stuntman is used, I guess my question is that you feel like the stuntman should be credit. That's a good question, that's a good question. You think because they're a villain, we should say, hey look, not one person is capable of all this villainy. No, I think June is speaking

to the inherent innocence of the animal. And that we, and that we are that the movie is predicated on the idea that the monkey is itself the threat when in reality humanity is the threat because we are poisoning. Yes, we created them. Yes. I think that that is true. I think that, like, I think John Pankow is held to... But at the end scene, the final scene of this horror film

is Alan taking that monkey and fucking beating it to death. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, that monkey did arguably nothing wrong. Except evolve. Yes. Right, yes. So I nothing wrong. Except evolve. Yes. Right, yes. So I have a problem with that. Yeah, I don't disagree.

Yeah, and I guess what I'm saying, I have a problem with that overall, and I think by only crediting one monkey, it sort of weirdly perpetuates that idea. That's like, I guess. I have a hard time getting on I can't get on the point where you're talking about credit is where I fall apart this is like this is like I guess yeah like I understand that you want to blame humanity for the ills that it rains down upon the animal people or the animal the animals I do and

I like there needs to come up Like there needs to come up in, there needs to come up. There's no come up in for like. But that's in the movie, I agree with you. Why does, why does the SAG carry, card carrying monkeys have to be called out, why can't Boo at least get credit for being in this terrible movie?

I guess because, and it's a very subtle point, but I ask you to listen to it. It's because there was not one singular monkey playing that role, there were a bunch of monkeys. And they are monkeys, they are primates. Sure. Okay, and there's a monkey. Thank you.

Yes. Okay, so all of them are monkeys? Yes, all of them are monkeys. I guess what I'm saying is, I'm little people in monkey suits. Okay, so all of them are monkeys? Yes, all of them are monkeys. Because I thought some might be my little people in monkey suits. I guess what I'm saying is by giving that monkey, even a name, I have to say, even a name like what's the name?

Booth, oh, Booth. Booth the actor? Yes, Booth the actor, it's like they're not actors. You're monkeys. How dare you. They're primates. This is so controversial. I am, I'm so confused about what is happening right now.

I will give you the end of the movie Okay, I to be fair. I did not actors I did three years at the actors workshop with an orangutan. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, I was teacher or fellow student No student. Okay. We were in death of a salesman together. I played Biff. He played half. Oh my gosh Okay, I will give you the end and maybe this will add fuel to you. The alternate ending of the movie, the original darker ending features researchers packing up trucks with dozens of little ellas going off to work as helper monkeys.

So I guess like the end is that they're all out there to commit murder? Well this movie, I mean like the new... But I don't even understand how that's possible. The new Planet of the Aes reboots yeah I do too kind of play in this same sandbox a little bit of like the natural evolution of primates into you know you know more communicative more socialized blah blah blah blah and I feel like this just is so confusing. But what I still can't figure out is why the actor monkey

is coming under fire from you. Because the actor monkey has no idea it's an actor, right? It's just- I don't know. Have you seen- Have you seen Booz Instagram? By the way, that's what makes me uncomfortable. Booz Instagram, I don't like it.

It's too many selfies. It's because they feel like it's sort of us projecting our own feelings about, Have you seen Boo's Instagram? By the way, that's what makes me uncomfortable. It's cause they feel like it's sort of us projecting our own feelings about, it's making Boo a person when Boo is at the end of the day a monkey. But what do you want out of this? I guess my question is like, don't you think that if it had six people listed in the credit, what would the difference be?

Well, we'll be six monkeys, not people. All right, so you, okay, wait a minute. You just don't want Boo. I don't even really want Boo to have a name. Do you think there's another monkey that is like, fuck Boo, doesn't the credit? No, I just think it's, okay, here's my point. It's dangerous, it really is actually very dangerous

to personify and to project all these things onto animals when we should be treating them responsibly. I just don't understand. Man. Like the primary garbage. But only listing one actor, I think it just, it's not, that's not the hugest grievance I have with this, but it's a tiny part of what I think is a big problem

in this movie. I have no problem agreeing with you on the fact that the villain of the movie is, though through misguided, helpful attempt, John Pankow. And as a result, Stephen Root as well, who is John Pankow's boss, because they are the ones conducting these experiments on these monkeys to try and make them smarter.

So that true science and our quest for, you know, to gain more knowledge and push whatever forward, that is the villain in an interesting way, why not? But, and you're right, nobody's ever really called to task for it, but listen, Blue, the actor's just out there with his head shot, trying to get jobs, finally gets a job, I don't know why he has to task.

So you think that the monkey, alright, so do you think the same thing goes down for that Matt LeBlanc movie, Ed, where he's the baseball player in some practice? That's the TV show, this is, it's called, I think it's Ed. So basically the monkey or the monkey MVP, most valuable primate, the hockey monkey movie,

that they should be listed as. Hockey monkey. Hockey monkey. They should be listed as multiple. I guess what I'm saying is I think we need to be reminded, I think it's actually dangerous. How? You said that a couple of times now.

What is the danger? What is going on? What is the danger? The same problem I have with people being like, oh, those bear attacks those bears are attacking people. It's like, well, no, actually campers are leaving food and bears are being bears. Yeah, that's true. It goes to that point.

Right. Okay, but here's the thing. Those bears are attacking those people in the real world. It's not a movie about bears attacking people. I feel like I'm the sober person at a party where there's like a really intense joke. No, no, you listen to me. You know.

Yes, the bears are just, the bears are just, because the problem is we think, this is the problem actually, we think bears shouldn't attack and that we've evolved past it and we should be able to camp wherever we want. Who thinks that? A lot of people think that. Nobody thinks that. A lot of people think that. Nobody thinks that bears have evolved past it, and we should be able to camp wherever we want. Who thinks that? A lot of people think that. Nobody thinks that. A lot of people think that. Nobody thinks that bears have evolved past the point of attacking.

Okay. Nobody thinks that. But this is the danger. This is the danger in showing animals in movies and portraying them as who the friendly, you know, friendly monkey who's playing this part. It's like, well, wait a second. No, he didn't grow up to be an actor. friendly monkey who's playing this part, it's like, well, wait a second, no.

He didn't grow up to be an actor. He was born to be a monkey and that's it. And we like putting monkeys in little suits. And it's sort of like, something like stuff. Okay, but the monkey doesn't wear a suit in this movie, just as a disclaimer. If people are like, ooh, I wanna see a monkey in his suit,

so much monkey shines, there is no suit in there. As a matter of fact, the beginning of the movie puts that disclaimer out there, like, this is a real thing, this is how monkeys act. Here's the problem I have with the credits. Ah! Ah! Wow, wow, jeez.

Here's the problem I have with the credits. Can I? That credit. Ah! That credit is for us humans to watch and go, isn't that cute? Okay. Boo the monkey played that part.

It's not that cute. My problem with that is that Boo the monkey has no fucking clue that he's an actor, that he has a credit in this movie. What about children? I have a problem with that. Okay, okay, do you think so if I'm hearing you right? I think you can sum up your point by saying in regards to the monkeys in this movie be a monkey

Just be a monkey. I'm calling back be a man Wait though, I think I get what I don't I don what you're saying. I do not. I don't think it's dangerous though. You don't? I don't think it's dangerous, because I don't know who the danger, who is the danger, who, for whom is their danger?

I think for all of us. For humanity? Yes, I do. Do you think that the monkeys are gonna feel like boo? No, but I think the test of humanity is really how we treat and take care of the weakest. And I would say that you learn a lot, you learn a lot about people,

by how they treat animals. Sure, this should have taken a real turn. Okay, well let me just go, let me go to another. This is a fictional movie. This is not a documentary. That's insane, this is amazing. This is a movie, it's not a documentary. It is not a documentary, but's not saying. This movie is not a documentary. It is not a documentary, but monkeys are in this movie acting.

Sure. Well, they're doing a good job. This is amazing. Well, look, why don't we all just be like, why don't we all just be like beautiful 1965 on Amazon who just said, finish watching this movie with my mother and nephew and I gotta say, we were entertained. The character Ella the monkey was off the chain.

We were all scared of the things that Ella did in the movie. Now that person seemed to really like Ella. Off the chain. Oh man. Well, June, we'll get to your thoughts more on your podcast, Monkey Shine's podcast, where it's a monkey business about monkeys. It's called This Is Dangerous.

I think I have made my point though. I think you did. I think we definitely made it. Really? No reason to continue to belabor it. And to be honest, I didn't know I felt that strong. I was gonna say, I watched this movie with you. You did not show any signs of this.

Until just now, but. Question for all of you. I think we know we're June's Nants. Would you recommend watching this? This is on Netflix, it's free, Jason. I mean, if you want, maybe start an hour in. I, I... And by the way, can I say one more thing?

Oh my God. I do know that no monkeys were harmed during the filming of this movie. Sure, sure. And I actually did appreciate the disclaimer because I needed it, but like, I do get that there are... Because I needed it.

That there are people on set and then animals are treated very well. June. In quotations, yeah. If the part of Ella had been credited to six monkeys, okay? It would have helped me. Would it have been as dangerous? I don't understand that. The part of Ella had been credited to six monkeys, okay? It would have helped me. Would it have been as dangerous? I don't understand that.

Would it have been as dangerous a piece of film? This movie appears to be almost like, do you feel like it's going to incite something or is it dangerous for humanity? I think it is a little dangerous. Okay, so if it had been like... Okay, now let me ask you this. If the credits had been Ella played by Boo, Mickey, Minnie, Reynolds, blah blah blah,

or if, or would that have been dangerous? What if it had been, Boo was played by Monkey One, Monkey Two, Monkey Three, so that the monkeys aren't even given names because they're just goddamn monkeys. No, it's not that they're just goddamn monkeys, it's that they're just monkeys. So wait, but what's the Please this point like you just don't want monkeys to be in movies Problem well, no, that was not a monkey. That was a person in the suit But here's my question though should children not be in movies too because they don't know they're baby

Yeah, baby, what about a baby in them? Oh, what about a baby in a movie? Well, but you guys, my bigger problem, the reason why this has all come up is because humanity and science never got any sort of, we weren't reprimanded at all for these horrible things that we did to this monkey in the context of the movie. And that's a big problem, and I do think that's dangerous. We just made the monkey out to be,

we're supposed to be cheering when that monkey is killed. This again is not a documentary though. This is like, this is like to say like, I feel bad for Leatherface. He's killing all these people, but like not a lot of people know like, Leatherface had it tough, like circumstances created Leatherface

that made him a terrible murderer. Well, I choose to believe that. Jason Voorhees. That Freddy Krueger, humans have a lot more free will and there are when you take a helpless little monkey who's in a lab and start doing horrible experiments on them. Like I think that you know the scientist is at fault not this monkey. But what about if those experiments yield real, like actionable advances in medicine?

All right, well. Or better cosmetics. I do not believe in testing on animals. Okay, well we got that. I know you're all up for the event testing. So, June, would you recommend that? That's where we're at. So you're saying you would not,

that we finally got to the main point. Wow, wow, wow. That was a wormhole unlike any. That was one of the most satisfying things that's ever happened on this show. You, June, do you recommend watching this movie? I know what your answer is going to be. There's some crazy stuff in this movie.

And I think after you've listened to the podcast and you want to watch it, sure, that's fine, but I mean, just keep in mind what I've said. Yeah, okay, well, don't get back into it. We think we got it. It's also very long. It's too long. It's so long to watch.

But there are some fast-forward through it. But there are some amazing lines. I enjoyed the first part of this. Which makes no sense. I know Jason. That's the part that makes no sense to me. I would say that there are some amazing lines, some really crazy things.

I laughed very hard. Sometimes when we watch a bad movie, it's like, oh, getting through it, but there are some amazing lines some really crazy things I laughed very hard like sometimes when we watch a bad movie is like oh getting through it But there are some pretty amazing things in that first hour, but I think I'm recommending it guys we did it We always do it will continue to do it. Thank God Thank you to everyone that is here anyone have anything they want to promote I'll give another shout out to the guy that made the daredevil t-shirt. Yeah, what's his name? Harrison Hendricks. Nope. His name is Harrison Freeman Harrison Freeman How did this get made t-shirt get him quick because we're gonna have a new one coming up for Christmas time and

Oh I Um, um, oh, I, I, well, I want to think, I want to think Averill Halley, who pulls all of our clips. I want to think Nick Kiley does all of our research, Leanna Waldron, who does all of our amazing graphic design. I'd like to actually thank, thank you, Brett, and thank you to the monkeys who were in this movie. Well, they weren't here today.

Yeah. And most of them do the life expectancy. You're dead. Yeah. So enjoy that. So think about that at work. Thank you, Dead Monkeys, for bringing us the joy that we experience. Please, someone have like a poster with June and Boo on it

and get that out there for animal rights. And with the tagline, this is dangerous. You can follow us on Twitter. Oh, yes. We have a Twitter account. It's at HDTGM. We update it all the time. And by the way, the new Fast and Furious poster came out

It's the fast it's called Furious and if you guys want to Photoshop all our heads and Adam Scott into that that would I'd enjoy that make us real happy. Yeah. All right. We'll see you next time. Bye. Bye