How Did This Get Made? - No Holds Barred LIVE! w/ Thomas Lennon (HDTGM Matinee)

Episode Date: August 19, 2025

Ready to enter a state of HULKAMANIA, brother? LIVE at Largo in LA, Thomas Lennon (Reno 911!) joins Paul, June, & Jason to discuss the 1989 Hulk Hogan classic, No Holds Barred! They cover everything from dookie pants and fighting guns with pies, to June learning that ‘No Holds Barred’ actually has a meaning. (Originally Released 03/25/2014) • Go to hdtgm.com for tour dates, merch, FAQs, and more• Have a Last Looks correction or omission? Call 619-PAULASK to leave us a voicemail!• Submit your Last Looks theme song to us here• Join the HDTGM conversation on Discord: discord.gg/hdtgm• Buy merch at howdidthisgetmade.dashery.com/• Order Paul’s book about his childhood: Joyful Recollections of Trauma• Shop our new hat collection at podswag.com• Paul’s Discord: discord.gg/paulscheer• Paul’s YouTube page: youtube.com/paulscheer• Follow Paul on Letterboxd: letterboxd.com/paulscheer• Subscribe to Enter The Dark Web w/ Paul & Rob Huebel: youtube.com/@enterthedarkweb• Listen to Unspooled with Paul & Amy Nicholson: unspooledpodcast.com• Listen to The Deep Dive with June & Jessica St. Clair: thedeepdiveacademy.com/podcast• Instagram: @hdtgm, @paulscheer, & @junediane• Twitter: @hdtgm, @paulscheer, & msjunediane  • Jason is not on social media• Episode transcripts available at how-did-this-get-made.simplecast.com/episodesGet access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using the link: siriusxm.com/hdtgm

It's a story of one network TV president's desire to be the number one network in television and a shocking indictment of the glorification of violence and televised sports. We saw the thought-provoking no-holds barred, so you know what that means. Now it's time to celebrate, we're going to have a good time, celebrate some failure, not just be a hated, because you know you wonder, how did this campaign? Let's wallow in the mediocrity of sub-border. perhaps we'll find the answer to the question How did this get made?

Hello, people of us! And hello people of Los Angeles! We are live at Largo, our home in Los Angeles, to do a very important live show. It is a night of Hulkomania here as we get into one of the classics of the Hulk Colgan Canon. But before we go any further, let me introduce,

introduce my two co-hosts, please welcome Jason Anzoukis. And June, Diane Rayfield. Wow. We have a very special guest here tonight. The amazingly talented, very funny, Tom Lennon. Ooh, I like that you get, I like that you get an office chair. No, I don't like this. We are stepping it up.

I don't like the status of this. Tom is four feet higher than everyone else. Why did we give Tom a high status chair? He's doing visual jokes. On an audio podcast. Jokes for the podcast. Guys, the year

was 1989 and Hulk Colgan was the star of a feature big budget movie. This is an amazing movie. This movie boggled my mind. Like, straight out of the gate, I did not know what was happening. And it was.

At the end of the movie, I did not care. I could talk about this movie all night long. I watched it. Thank you so much. And I had to buy this movie to watch it. You're welcome. So I used my Amazon Prime membership to own this forever. And just so you know, Tom, we bought it twice.

Yes. Spent quite a bit of money. Have you guys ever seen some of those Mapplethorpe pictures where it's two like glistening cocks that hang? And you walk up and you're like, Is this just two giant glistening cocks that are hanging an inch away from each other? That's exactly what this movie is.

I felt like... Vainy and throbbing. I felt like... Vainy and throbbing? Everybody's... Everyone is vainy and throbby in this movie. No... There is no line that is not growled.

I was... I was saying that for... This must be a first that the lead actor in a film, his first sounds... For the first five minutes are all just grunts and ground. No.

Not just the lead actor. I would say three... Like, most of the actors in this movie have nothing to do but... Ah! Uh! Not to shoot my load. Ladies and gentlemen,

Tiny, Tom, Tiny Lister... Yeah. Says two things. This blew my mind. You just told me this backstage. He's on the box doing this. Ha! But he says...

The things he says in the entire... What is it? The movie's all... like four and a half, five hours? Yeah, please. By the way, I genuinely wish it was. I never wanted it to end because it kept on getting crazier.

Yep, yep. Tiny Lister, as the main villains, this is everything he says in the entire film. First line is one word. Great opening line. You're right. I don't know what you just said. Yep, he said his own name, Zeus.

He says, and then the next thing he says, like in Act 3, when they need, they're like, hey, should the main villains say anything? he says those don't guess yep I know those are his only

only lines but here is the thing I didn't realize that until Tom said it that's how good of an actor he is I didn't he carried the movie on grunts and grounds

I'd like to see Brad Pitt do that did anyone understand the eyebrows were drawn on with pencil okay I have a question Tiny Lister's right eyebrow. Tiny Lister's right eyebrow is drawn on just to make things a million times crazy.

One of them is like, you know what his eyebrows are? His eyebrows are legitimately a checkmark. Because one is half an eyebrow. It connects to the other one, full eyebrow. There's a check mark on this gentleman's head. But here's the thing.

It would have been, okay, it would have been a choice if they had taken half of his eyebrows and shaved them off. Like, if they had shaved them off. off a half an eyebrow. Okay, that's a choice. Yep. But the choice you wouldn't expect at all. No, no, no.

Is to draw on half an eyebrow. Sure. To pencil it in. Yeah. And that is a creative hair and makeup artist. There is somebody who's willing to say, let's make a statement with this. It's because Joan Severance was hogging the makeup chair.

This movie... Are you guys done with Joan? We got to get... We've got to get tiny in here, guys. Come on, you guys. this movie just to give you guys an idea if you have not seen it Hulk Hogan If you haven't seen it

Go fuck yourself Like I don't know what you're doing If you're listening to this Stop what you're doing Your life will only get better There are a lot of movies we do On the podcast that it's like You know what

You don't have to have watched this You know or we took the bullet for you Stop everything Leave the theater Right now I feel like it is like The Room in the sense That I could watch this again

and be thoroughly entertainous. Oh, oh, please, it makes the room look like the magnificent Ambersons. Yes, the much better Orson Welles movie than Citizen King. I didn't go crazy. Yeah, no, no, I get it. I didn't say so, yeah. Well, let's just say that the movie opens up with this image,

which is just Jesse Ventura wearing a Cleopatra wig. I don't go here, I just take that. that's that's where we're starting Jesse Ventura and Mean Gene and Mean Gene with Mean Gene

and they are Jesse and mean Gene yes this is where it starts off real confusing it starts with the Cleopatra thing and I'm like oh wait isn't that Hulk Hogan oh fuck but they are elected this man

governor that's the other thing when I saw this is like wow we elected we elected this man governor not we did we no no Minnesota

We all moved to Minnesota for that. But that is a crazy thing. Hulk Hogan just made sex tapes. At this point, whenever I see Jesse Ventura or whenever I hear him on Howard Stern or anything, all I picture is James Adomian. It is only Adomian's Jesse Ventura that comes through. So basically the Hulk is...

Can anyone for a million dollars, why do they not call his character Hulk Hogan? Why the fuck? They give him this fucking made-up name. I think the reason is why is because his name is owned by the WW. Who produced the film?

But this was produced by the WWF. It's produced by him. It also made... But you can tell he's having trouble remembering his name. I couldn't figure that out. Rip. It made no sense.

Oh, that's me. Because Jesse is Jesse. How about say Hulk and then say Rip and then we'll cut out the Hulk part? Mean genius. We just won't use that part. A lot of the wrestlers are their own names. Well, I think that Hulk was trying to branch out.

He was like, Rip is very different than Hulk. Yeah, that's probably it. He wanted to play a character. He wanted to act. Yeah, that's probably, yeah. What I love about Hulk Hogan in this movie is, like, he's like, when rap stars do, like, comedy, they can't not look cool. Like, they always have to look cool.

And Hulk has to, Hulk has never shown up by anything, like, uh... Except his hair. No, but it's also clear, like, they're, they're, dangling something to get him to look in the right place. Like, it's exactly if you were shooting a cat food commercial. Like, there's a feeling of, let me tell you something, Jimmy. And there's just this, like, it's an entire film made. Some sort of wrestling magpie, is what you're saying?

There's literally not a usable. There's actually a scene. I don't know if anybody else picked up on this, but there's a scene in the conference room at the network Hulk is on? At the World Television Network? No, not the World Television Network. No, wait, which one?

The other one? It starts off on. Wait, oh, he's on another? Well, this, okay, this is a TV, this is a movie that is about a battle between television networks. Yes, so Hulk Hogan starts, RIP starts off at a network called...

I can't remember. But not the other one... World News Television is trying to lure him away and onto their network. Right, because in this world, wrestling is so big, that networks are in the toilet because wrestling is so, like,

wrestling is, everyone's watching wrestling. Oh, by the way, and if you had the Cosby Show or Cheers, it was doing nothing. Without it, you get the number one wrestling show, they're willing to perpetrate rapes and murders. Yes, yes. That's correct.

And also... Over and over. Also, wrestling in this universe is real. Yes, that is very, no. How many rapes you have to perpetrate. It's horrifying. Also, they end up, and I'm sorry to jump around,

but the World Television Network... How dare you? It's going to be so confusing. The World Television Network plucks... What's her face? I don't remember. Samantha. Yes. From an agency to become the new... She's a turncoat. She's like a PR executive.

She was a mole at the other television network. Guys, we're going out of... Let's go back a second. Because we're getting way far ahead of ourselves. Yeah, we are. John Severance will be a turn. coat. Spoiler alert.

Let's, yeah. I do want to just, before we even get into the movie, I want to just picture one thing in your mind and say this. Apparently, Hulk Hogan and, what's his name, Vince McMahon got the script. They did not like it. Spent 72 hours

in a hotel together and rewrote it from scratch. I would kill to be anywhere near that room. The amount of cocaine? And the story ideas, that would have been an amazing room. By the way, who's typing?

And how many typewriters did they break? Every time they make a spelling mistake. Full motion. Yeah, they're also doing this on an Apple 2E. So, just so you guys know, wrestling is the biggest thing. This World Television Network is in the toilet. because they don't have a compelling wrestling star. So they want to get RIP, A.K.A. Hulk.

Rip him up. That's his catchphrase. Which is like the shot... And he does like a Shaka, like a Hawaiian kind of like... Hand signal. This finger's a little... I looked at it. It's almost a fishbone.

This is a little stretched. Yeah. And this is up. It's Shaka. It's half Shaka. Half fishbone. And he does it. All this does it when he's exiting room.

Yeah. He comes, looks back, and he's like... Also, so you know, this movie took place in the part of the 80s where everyone looked like pedophiles. Yeah. Joan Severance looks exactly like the cover of Rio. Yes, she does.

In every moment. Joan Severance, we have a lot to get into it. There is so much to talk about. Her line deliveries are unfathomable. It's as if, you know, she's very much... the best thing in the movie. The story about Christopher Walken is that when he reads a script,

the first thing he does is he goes through a script and he takes out all of the punctuation. Joan Severance puts it all back in. Her entire analysis is like, I'm going to put periods after just a bunch of words. I looked up at what she's done since, and I was surprised that she wasn't in a lot more. Oh, what?

I will say it's unfair. Joan Severance was in a playboy in the early 80s at some point. So it was kind of unfair because as soon as she came in I had a soft spot for her. Or I had a hard spot for her. She's the kind of like hot in a Playboy

that when we were kids you hoped we would find in the woods. Yes. You know what I mean? The hair was very well done. That's the level of Playboy we're talking about.

Sexy Joan Collins. Now did you go to the woods to look at it? You always found out of the woods. You always went to the woods looking for pornos. That's where I found. And by the way,

they were there that was the unspoken rule I had a penthouse air freshener that I found in the woods I try to imagine the person though who felt they had to hide that in the woods oh you know what I don't want my mom to see

this I'll put it in the woods and I took that shit and put it in a safe before the internet we all had a little bit of Jeff Dahmer in us yeah but that was the thing when you had to be when you just had to be wily Yeah, when you were traipsing around in the woods, you would look in like old stumps or under things

because that's what fucking weirdos would put pornoes and as a kid it's your job to find that shit. We were boys with boners on a mission. Because, by the way, there was no fucking internet. There wasn't an internet to jerk off to. Do you know how could you have it? There was a crinkly black and white of Joan Severance. that someone else had used.

That's what I want you to really think about. These are ours. These are our. Communal porno. All right, well, look, the performance of the movie, in my opinion, Kurt Fuller. Kurt Fuller.

Unbelievable. Unbelievable. I tweeted at him today to see if I could get him to come here. It was too little, too late. But here is a scene just so you get an idea of the level of bringing it that Kurt Fuller is doing. Sells. This is what people want. This is what I want.

And which one of you is going to go out and get it for me? But RIP is already under contract to another network, Mr. Prowell. Tell me something I don't already know, Johnston. Contracts are nothing but words. But, Mr. Beryl, I'm told that Ripp's word is his bond. Bond. Then we get him to break his bond. What's his price?

That's what I want to know. What's his price? With all due respect, Mr. Brel. This guy's always asking a tough question. Oh, God. Is this to be wise guy? And every last one of you, spare me your mely mouth with all due respect crap. what this network needs

this network gets I promise you that the rip has his price he's amazing here's what I'm sad about though what I'm sad about is it you didn't play the entire clip of when he

walks around the table and tells one of the female executives to go take a leak Take a He goes Miss Tidings Take a leak Wait He goes

Take a leak He doesn't push her No right He only pushes Later He pushes someone later But that The bummer is

One of the funniest I've ever heard It's His performance To go take a masterpiece Is hands down the best

He is the He's the me of then Which is Kind of a bummer He is sitting in front of a bust of himself in that scene

I froze it a few times that is definitely a bust of himself he is at a boardroom table that is like a V that he is at the head of so his desk almost has two jutting out legs where people are on either side which I thought was a great boardroom desk

it's called the World Television Network he's like Bill Murray's character from Scrooge without the redemption and the irony yeah are we to understand that on this network there's news channel like there's news there's um sitcoms because people are pitching

sitcoms like people say I'm assuming what about a game show people like those take a leak what about a sitcom those are the pitches of his highest level executives okay my favorite thing

my favorite thing he says to his guys is they're watching by the first the first scene is Hulk rip in like a match, and then it cuts to these douches in a conference room watching it. Okay, the best thing of the conference room, too, is that...

Yes, I want that... I want that jockass. He keeps calling... He keeps calling Hulk. I want that jockass on this network. 10 o'clock tomorrow. Boardroom, period. Talk to me

But now my question is When Kurt Fuller brings him to the office His tactic to Woo Hulk is not very good He basically the scene unfolds like Look here, Rip Everyone's got their price And the Hulkster's response is I guess you haven't heard

About Maybe you haven't heard about my charity work. Word for word, that was the most usable take. By the way, also such a shoehorn thing. Rip cares about the kids. He does charity. They never stop saying about how he cares about the kids doing sports. And we'll find out later on because we do see him do his charity work.

Yep. That the name of his charity is simply sports for kids. Well, the titling in this movie is pretty bad because we'll just... Foggin' finish. It's sports for kids. And the TV network is called the World Television Network. Go, go. We only have 71 more hours to finish the screenplay.

Keep going. Keep writing, Vince. Keep writing, brother. You're right. It is Vince typing. So Kurt Fuller essentially is like, you have a price. Everyone has a price. Hark says no. At which point Kurt Fuller, his next move is

Are you telling me? My money is they cut it up for you? Like, immediately, that is next. Hey, Kurt, one more with some energy. Because this is a movie now. Kurt, how are people going to know if you're mad, brother? Hey, brother. Get as close to their face as you can.

Brother, I want you in this thing, man. When we met that day at the Earth Cafe, I thought we were in this together. When we smoked that devil weed, brother. When we shared that jazz cigarette, brother. I didn't know you were going to phone it in Hulk then proceeds to rip up the check beat up everyone in his office

Whoa whoa whoa whoa oh So he rips up the check He shoves it into Kurt Fuller's mouth Yes and he says can I say it Oh it's so good I won't be there when that clears And then I think that's when he gives this When he's exiting the room

He exits the room he gives the shocker Like that was fun Like, it was sort of like, it was his, it wasn't like, yeah, did it. It was kind of like, yeah, that's my thing. It's a film of casual attempted murder at 20 different points. But here's a weird thing about Ripp's character. You know, why doesn't he want to go to the other network? By the way, why is so vested?

Let's really dig into this. He doesn't work at, like, he doesn't live in, like, on a mountain with, like, monks. He's on a different TV network. That's what I'm saying. He's under contract. And his word is his bond. Kurt Fuller does say, Contracts are just words.

And I believe they did say that his word is his bond. Like he's a faith. I heard that his word is his bond. Take a leak. Why does he tell the lady to take a leak? It is the weirdest. It's the best thing I've ever heard.

It's the weirdest thing. He tells her to take a leak and not too much not too soon thereafter a man does shit his own pants whoa whoa we can't get into that just yet wait wait wait do you have this

yeah or I got that okay so so what's it's the craziest performance of anything I've ever seen this is this is truly truly truly erotic so the lights are down

I have so many things to say about this I guess we should just set up the scene because they have a little bit of the limo scene so he leaves he shoves the check into Kurt Fuller's mouth, he says, I won't be there on that. Clears. Does that? Do we get that?

Check it. Check it. Hulk. It's perfect. Check it. Check it. Print it. Then they put him in a death limo. Yes. A limo with all steel windows that have the steel window function. And by the way, the World Television Network seems to be located in a very rural

area. Yes. It's like the WWF. It's like in Fairfield, Connecticut. Also, their resources their resources are that of Bond villains like why does like I mean maybe I mean I guess I was going to ask this question and I was like of course he does

does does Rupert Murdoch have a limousine with steel gates and then I was like yep he probably does oh no no I'm straight up murdering people he does yeah well this is the other thing is plan B in this movie is always murder yeah the first plan is go talk to him

four seconds after that murder Well, you're forgetting the second step. Talk to him, yell at him, murder. Yeah. But you do have a middle stage. Well, that's what's going to be my question, because Hulk gets in the limo, the steel windows, et cetera, and then he fights the limousine.

Yes. He gets into a... By the way, when he kicks... But why? Is the guy taking him somewhere? When he kicks the door from the inside, it makes the limousine careen off the room. Oh, yeah. I'm not shitting.

you at all. Oh no, no. You will see it in this scene. Yeah, his physical force in the backseat of a limousine moves it off the ground. Like you're driving, like left right. As if every punch and kick Hulk does is a punch to someone's face they need to react to, only the reaction is coming from the driver of the car that he's in. In a totally safe steel box

on the other side of him. Yes, yeah. I would like to see Mythbusters on this. Could this happen? You could get Hulk in a car. All right, so here we go. So, guys, so MythBusters, guys, Adam, Jamie, if you're listening, please come and do this episode. By the way, they need to do a whole no-holds-barred episode. How long does this take for a check to clear?

Here, here we go. What's that smell? It's dokey. It's spooky. That happened in this movie. I think I had this feeling when I was watching it, but I couldn't articulate it until now. I think the actor who says that line is wearing like a disguise.

he's got a hairpiece on for sure yeah he has a hair piece on but it almost seems like he knew what he had to do they had a hard time casting it and he was like I'll do it I'll absolutely do it if I can wear a disguise but by the way so he's he's shit literally I don't think I mean like the way is his name is probably in the credit you go back to what his pants looked like because they're actually just soaked

with water well that's what I wanted to talk about the dukees is on the outside of his suit jacket The Duky, yeah, the Duky is really vile looking It's just wet It's like, but I thought it was like diarrhea Look how high up it goes That's...

Look how high up it is. Guys, that's not Duky But I thought it was a liquidy diarrhea like right Or he pissed himself, any shit himself But if you pissed But how did he get rid of there, Paul?

It goes up to his fucking shoulder blades. It's up here. His shoulder blades got their period. I feel like they weren't confident in the line, what's that smell? It's doogie. Like, we need to show the audience. We need to show it.

But I guess I have to say, why not put him in a lighter suit? Like a white suit. Like a white linen suit. Everybody's a critic. Fucking Monday morning quarterback. They're looking at the dailies doing cocaine. Can you guys tell it's duky? It looks like he just, his shoulder blades pissed.

So anyway, we want to have this scene. It's a great fight scene. Hulk literally busts through a steel grate, lands on the top of a car, beats up all these guys. And at the end, this guy shits his pants. And it's going to be a great scene. It's going to be a really great scene.

But it is, it's interesting, because it is when they introduce, without any discussion of it, that Hulk Hogan has superpowers. Yes. Yeah. Oh, yeah. He's literally not from Earth.

He comes out like the Incredible Hulk. Yeah. And in that way, like, like, he pops out. Well, how about, like, all of his like facial craziness and then he's like he's like a feral animal

at the end of every day they're like Hulk there's two pages we didn't get so we're just going to roll just a ton of B-roll and just you're mad your neck your eyes are big your neck you're growling you're mad neck growl eye guttural sounds neck I do imagine that this was

a control Apple's moment when him and Vince McMahon came up with Duky. And they're like, we did enough work for tonight. Let's go. Let's go down to the bar and meet some honeys. In the next scene, I think, we meet Joan Severance, right?

Don't we go to the Hillbilly Bar pretty soon? Yeah. That's next as well. The scene where he's at his home network. After the Duke's the next scene, I believe. Where he meets Joan Severance. She's come in. She's like the new gal in town. She's his new, I believe she's his new like touring agent

yeah touring agent like uh rip which is your and he's like oh that's my character's name uh really Hulk Hogan wink wink wink meet your new touring agent Hulk we're rolling on this

she knows who you are sorry she called me Rip she's pretty I just want to make sure she knows it's me Hulk Hulkamania brother Hulk I mean the star of the movie you might recognize her from the cover of the Rio album is John Severance

and she comes in and she's no fucking nonsense. She's no nonsense, but he talks back to her and he gives her this, he gives, he says this chair, he goes, maybe we can talk about this later and she goes, fine, eight o'clock, I'll pick you up, dinner. Dressie. But everyone talks like this.

Everybody talks like there's an abundance of periods. But I believe at one point he also mentions, why not ask me about my charity work. Me does and hey. Again, fucking nailing it home. And I do understand why she had to clarify Dressy because he wears his costume. Oh, do we have, do you have a still of it?

I have, I have, I get this, he wears the Saturday night fever suit minus the black shirt. I don't have that. He's nude with a white on white thing. There's no headgear, so it's just like the beautiful, his locks and the paint. And it's an interesting meeting with the network

because she just seems to want to talk about his character and sort of, you know, make sure they're branding him the right way. And he doesn't want to talk about his character. Well, he doesn't seem to be there's any problem. He's the number one wrestler in the world. Like, why would they need to rebrand them? Right, but now I'm wondering, like, why did he even take the meeting at World News? Because he's a polite guy.

No, at the other one. Like, he's a nice lie. If you invite Hulk for dinner. Because his word is his bond. What the fuck's wrong with you people? And he accidentally said, okay. Oh, crap, I forgot my word. I also think the two networks have only one letter difference, so maybe he just was confused.

He put it down. Because here's the weird thing. If you send a limo for a Hulk, he'll get in it, and go wherever you take him. He did say thank you for the ride. He did. Until you try to kill him. It was the early, it was the late 80s. People got in limos.

It was fun. It's just odd because the stakes of this movie are really his allegiance to a huge corporation. Yeah. Those are the emotional stakes. Well, yeah. Oh, no, no. Then it's later it's going to be about... It's going to be about his brother, of course.

Oh, and true love. I'm true love. They go out to dinner in one of those cool abandoned churches. It's actually my... It's actually my favorite scene in the entire movie. But it's very clear from the abandoned church that they're like, Hulkster, look, we got the wrestling place here. There's an abandoned church.

We can put a bunch of tables in and we just fucking go. Everybody, if you sound good with that? Fuck it. Good. Go. Shut up. They start off on a stained glass window, like an organ player, right? And then down into a beautiful restaurant. Beautiful?

Beautiful, Jason. I'm going to put beautiful in quotes right now. The snooty matriety, then there's like, it's literally 12 minutes of him humiliating the Hulkster. Well, this is, and this is what I was talking about. He goes to this French restaurant and you're like, as an audience, you're like, oh, this guy is so out of place. I mean, he doesn't know how to act.

He has not active. French red, he's a fucking wrestler. And this shitty guy comes in and says, all we have is poissons, and cocoa lovins, and oh, you would never understand in a million years. Maybe you want a hamburger American or hot dog

a footlong. He just offers hot dog de footlong. And then offers it, and then goes, we don't have that. And then the bus boys come out. The bus boy has been waving to him the whole time. and standing

not even a foot apart they are yeah they're right there and then that is the part I would have auditioned for and then of course the chef comes

it's a great it was my favorite scene in the whole the best scene the chef comes on and says why why you know tell us that our friend Rip is here

Rip is so magnific to see you. He is such a loyal customer that they even say, do you want the regular? Yeah. And he says, Dacord. That was It's something like

Dacord. Yeah, it is. B. N. Sir, brother. That's what it is. Bonjourno. It was just like, you fucking think the hulkster doesn't know French. Fuck you. But, but,

Like, if we look at this for a second, if everybody on staff recognizes RIP, why doesn't the Maitre D know? Well, because they do say the Maitre D is new. Right. He said the Mager D hadn't been there because if they was, you'd know that RIP comes into that French restaurant all the time. I guess I'm going to say, though, you know. That's a good diet for a wrestler, too. French food? The matre d is, like, really taking some liberties.

It's, I guess, his first day on the job. And he's just assuming. And by the way, Horrible thing. Hulk is dressed up like Hulk doesn't cut me-me-mees. In this movie he's wearing a lot of headbands and a lot of like onesies.

But in this he got... No, you can see the outline and veins of his cock every single scene. And it's the one scene where you cannot see actual veinage and like the pulsing of his heart from his dick. Like an E.T.

Where it's just like you're like wow the whole pulsar eyes going up because his veins are throbbing in his dick have you ever if you haven't you must but if anyone ever seen the whole Colgan sex tape

oh yeah I'm gonna fill up my wine while we talk about this it is amazing and in one part where he is fucking he goes ooh shouldn't have that sushi come on guys

it just looks like honestly when I look at him in this movie it looks like it's uncomfortable to be him it's uncomfortable It looks like his body is going to explode and a smaller man is going to come out of it

and be like oh thank God I've been trapped in here for years it's been a horrible nightmare like quattro yeah there's a quattro in there

trying to as a woman roughly of Hulk's age at that point what were you attracted excuse me wait what are you asking what is they not of now

I'm saying like I'm saying like Hulk was probably about our age. So you're saying that in 89, I was Hulk's age? No, no, no, no, no. Now, like, do you find... But you were a young lady

exploring your body and learning about it? Yeah. Hulk Hogan looks terrible in this movie. And I know we're not talking about we have another Hulk movie to discuss in a little bit,

but I'm really upset about his hair. I'm really upset. What do you mean? Why not stop asking about his hair and ask about his charity work? I feel like the other finger was supposed to come up but steroid made it go in This one's gone squirrely on me, little boy

I broke it too many times, brother Oh, that little, that little fucker won't fall in line anymore It's my trick finger Trick finger, brother. So, June, what you were talking about is hair. Well, it's just shocking color, and it's such a shock of blonde hair. Totally natural.

He basically looks like nude clown. Yeah. He has like... You're like, oh, that guy was supposed to be a rodeo clown, but someone streaked off all the shit. The color. Yeah, there's no color left, and now it's just nude clown.

That's exactly right. But I would not be surprised if someone smudged him if there was paint underneath. Do you know what I mean? Like he has a white base and then they put tan on top of a white base. Somehow, yeah.

Like foundation. My issue is he is a bald man. Why not just cut that why cut the party in the band? He's like brother, that's my power, brother. I'm like Samson. He has like for a giant

behemoth of a man, he has like fine dolls hair. That's what's upsetting about it. It's Barbie hair. Like, honestly, yeah. Like, my nieces have dolls that have thicker, more lustrous hair than him. He has he doesn't have, like, a powerful mane, so just

like, I thought, like, for a while, like, I was like, oh, he's wearing those bandanas to hide it. He's not ever hiding it. It's always out and about. It's a choice, brother. It's me and Vince Neil in this to the end, brother. Bandana brothers. well obviously

so you know look Kurt Fuller needs to find somebody else and he goes to the local bar I'm getting so nervous we're going to run out of time There is a... I know we are going pretty slow There's so much to talk about I mean dwarf in a cage dog in the bathroom There's so much to talk about

I mean these are just headlines These are just headlines I mean there's so much I mean when they go to this far The dwarf in a cage really bugged me a lot Oh Dwarf in a cage never gets explained Even a cage is in it throughout never gets explained.

But it's something like that dwarf is... They go to this disgusting hillbilly bar. Disgusting players. Where everyone's disgusting. There's a 25-minute scene where David Pamer and the other guy who's kind of like me go to the bathroom.

I was going to say, I was going to say I could play the David Pamer part if you were playing the Kurt Foley part. You're the head guy, yeah. If they make this today, bro, we're set. I'm so psyched. Can I say this for real? I will write a sequel to this

movie starring you guys and Hulk Hogan By the way the WWE just launched an app this could go right

to them immediately done and done oh my God no whole part too they didn't take us up on Shark Nato 2 which is a huge mistake huge mistake

we offered it so they go to this hillbilly bar where there's no rules about fighting they keep a dwarf in a cage never explain why but the dwarf seems happy

there and also there's a prankster up there He'll throw He'll throw money in your drink Yes For some reason Which Irish people I think that's lucky

But in this place they go It's there's no rules No This is the first The concept of no holds Would you say there are holds Bards? There are no

Here No holds are being barred Oh This actually I want to talk about this June if you If you will indulge me this June and I

We were in the car one time It was like We're doing no holds barred She said that doesn't That doesn't mean anything You were Thought I had to title wrong. I told you

did not explain yourself. Well, I now know what it means after watching the movie. I had not heard the expression before. No holds barred? I had never heard that expression. But you never heard the word barred, right? That was the issue? Well, I still may not know what it means. I'm going to be totally honest. That's okay. Let's unpack this.

What do you think it means? Okay. What I think it means in the context of this movie is there are certain wrestling holds. Sometimes they're barred. and that's barred yes

barred meaning bar that move like that's not going to fly here those holds those holds aren't going to fly here yeah those holds will get you disqualified like sleeper hold is a is a non-barred rule non-barred right

but in the movie there are no holds that are barred oh yeah so is that right okay thank you I've never heard of it at the floor. So they go into this, there's wrestling going on,

and it doesn't even seem to be the main event of this bar. No, the bar, it just seems to be a secondary. Everyone's literally monsters. Yes. It's basically like a world created by Frank Miller that Frank Miller didn't know about.

Okay, so the waitress at one point says, I'm here, or tonight I want to get laid, relayed, and parley. That's the waitress, and she's the best performance in the film. She's amazing. She delivers that line. I don't know if you guys have watched true detective I won't give you any spoilers

but when in the final episode when they go to that guy's house and he's all the video tapes that's what this bar looks like but like as a bar like that house and those things as a bar it's a kind of place where the David Pamer underling guy says to Kurt Fuller these people would cheer at a hanging

and Kurt Fuller goes exactly that's the beauty of it. what I want. The bathroom is called the VD room, and there's a loose pit bull in it. There's a pit bull in the bathroom.

My favorite thing that happens in the bathroom, David Pamer and David Pamer light, the other guy, go to the bathroom for 20 minutes. They're like, I really, really need to take a week. I should have gone before we came. By the way, they're turning to that bathroom

is, it is epic. And then here it becomes like a dogma movie where they cut nothing out. They're just like, follow them for real. It's all natural lighting. It's a real dog.

They walk by a guy pissing in the hallway. Yeah. And then the hillbilly dude, they're like, these are the stupidest people in the world. Hillbilly busts out of the stall.

Yes. They're both peeing and troughs. Here, hold on, hold on. Paul, you guys do it. Do it. It's amazing. You're David Pamer. You're the other guy.

These. Hillbillies. This is the worst. These people are trash. And they're so stupid too. What did you say? What? Pulls them away. Put his head

up to their dicks. Examin's them for a long time. Yep. Y'all ain't worth it. Wait, he also says they have little dick. Tiny dick.

Teeny weenies. Teeny weenies. I believe he actually says teeny weenies and then y'all ain't worth it. But his face is like... In there. What makes that scene even better? Because here's the thing.

You don't need to get that close to a dick to know how big it is. Here is the thing. He's never-sighted. He's a fucked-up thing I've ever seen in a film. He is nearsighted and that's part of him. He can't afford glasses, you guys. What I love about that scene, though,

is he also just came from taking a massive shit. Because he... Right next to a pit bull. Yeah. He busts down that door. So first, first, there's a huge shit sound. Oh, yeah. That's what interrupts them. They're talking trash

and they hear like... Guys, by the way, we're about 10 minutes into this movie. Oh, I'm looking at it. No joke. This is literally seen now. We've made a mistake. This should be the whole night.

We don't have enough time. We got to speed through this, guys. We haven't even got to Zeus. So basically, as we said, so Kurt Fuller, Kurt Fuller gets the idea, and this is where another great name comes in, just like World Television Network,

Sports for Kids. Oh, oh. Battle of the Tough guys. Battle of the tough guys. We'll do a show, we'll call it Battle of the Tough Guys. And they're all like, Lugnut Johnson. They all have like terrible wrestling names and they all look like completely circular men

in like overalls. They all look like they're from the arm wrestling movies. I was going to say they're all the people who didn't make the over-the-top auditions. Yes, exactly. And then like there's one guy who's just spraying hairspray all over his face. And body.

And all of them, when they cut to all of them, they're like, they're all of them. They're all like the Tasmanian devil. While I was watching this in my house, twice I had to go get a ricola for my own throat. For the fucking growling. Now, the first broadcast of this, because I can only assume this is going out on television,

live. The host of it is the head of the network Kurt Fuller. He is hosting the broken. And it's also just set in the bar. Yeah. Because that's what it would be like if like, if like, Les Moon Vez. It was hosting Big Brother.

He was like Tonight on Big Brother. He was the Super Bowl. I don't know if you noticed though. The extras did change for Battle of the Tough Guys. Yeah, the snorty waitress put in a spark like a sparkly head beer. And also, I mean that bar was filled with just vagrants and they

once they were shooting a television show they did bring in sort of a fairly normal looking audience but it also seemed like it was very I mean well yeah so they're doing this battle it's very kind of poorly choreographed but this is my question I really want to get to which is this is the only one

before this you've had no question none everything was made very clear to me because the plot was very simple so now we're on minute 11 they're having they're doing a live television broadcast people are fighting I get it all right it's like And then all of a sudden, in this bar, it's not a set.

And there are no cameras that I see. No, no, they're very small. They're very small. They don't, they're not in evidence as much as they should be. Yes. Yeah. So, like if Christopher Nolan had made it, you would see them more. Yeah.

I wish Christopher Nolan would remake this movie. It would be a challenge. Tiny Zeus Lester in that Batman movie, too. Oh, Christian Bale. It's amazing. But he was, so they've worked with both. Oh, my God. if he was on the boat.

Tiny Zeus Lester is on the boat and Batman with the Joker. Holy shit. So, um... Oh, I wish we had him here. I worked with him on NTSF and he was... Tiny?

Amazing. Tiny was amazing. Yeah. Got the set, said, I need Taco Bell. Now. We got him Taco Bell. Um... I feel that every second of my life.

I just don't say it. If you look like tiny, you could request it, and people will go running. Oh, yeah, two PAs going to the quickest Taco Bells. All right, so this is the part I don't understand. So it's in a bar, and it seems to me like Zeus cuts an entire wall out. Yes. Because he also has superpowers that have never been explained. Kicks down a wall, like a structural wall.

It wasn't like an entrance. I don't understand what that was. And if it was planned, I don't think it was planned because Kurt Fuller was like, oh, who's this guy? He has all the powers. He has the powers of Magneto. No, that's a good question, though, because I did wonder where did he come from?

Yes. He wasn't from jail. No, June, that's a great question. And was he told, like, go cut down the wall and there's guys fighting on the other side? What the fuck happened? Well, I guess he heard about the $100,000 and he wanted it, tax-free.

Tax-free. He burst down the wall. He burst down that wall. For all you WWF's nerds, I might be getting my facts wrong, but I'm pretty sure this is the truth. There's a certain point in Hulk's career where he was accused of being racist. It's called this movie.

And I believe that scene in that place was to show, no, I am a defender of black people. As a matter of fact, I eat in their soul food kitchens. Why do the two guys robbing the place have to be black? It bummed me out so bad. Come on, man. They could be skeevy, white tweakers. No, it was just like the classic.

He was like, I would fucking throw pies of these black guys. He throws... By the way, too many pies in that restaurant for him to throw. There were like, it's like someone lined up 40 pies. Somebody must... Like, all the pot owners got up.

The robbery would not have cost them as much as the pie loss. This scene felt to me... Jeez, Hoke. As if it was written for a Dukes of Hazard episode. And then the writer was like, it's not going to work, so I'll save it. And then later was like, wait, I'll put it in this movie. Hulk, I just want to say there was $30 in the register,

and those pies were worth 110. So, not to be a dick, but... Hey, did I tell you about my charity? Shaka! There's a song that's playing, and you hear the lyrics for a brief second, which is, I got ketchup on my blue jeans. Ha! that's that's the soundtrack to the to the soul food restaurant scene

and then the robbers come in and then it's pie fight oh my god this i just remember just so just as we're barreling through this movie we're not barreling through this we're not at all push the 10 o'clock show till 11 it's a couple of scenes yeah it's most of the same people right yeah we'll just add an hour it'll be fine the scene before this that's at the conference room when they're discussing how battle the tough guys went and what the numbers are. I don't care what people said. I mean, we got the biggest number of errors.

One of Kurt Fuller's underlings gets a video camera. This is my favorite part. This is my favorite part. Okay, so that's a birthday present. Well, yeah. The most sloppy exposition of all time. Do you have this thing?

I don't. I wish I had this scene. I should have. Okay. It's coming. Push-ups is coming, bro. Push-ups where you can see into Hulk Hogan's butt-hole. If you think we're not going to talk about jerking off push-ups,

you've lost your mind. Hulk Hogan watched the dailies. He said, you can see up my butthole. I love it. Print it, check it. But now, in that scene, that guy is filming a television. Yes. It's a present I got for my birthday.

Literally, David Pater's like, hey, are you enjoying the birthday gift that you just got? And the guy says, do you know, do I have the line? I have the line if you don't. The guy goes, video is my life. Video is my life. Then what's as Kurt Fuller says,

that just gave me an idea. Despite all of your shortcomings, Mr. Micklepan. That's what I don't know. The idea is unrelated in any way to him standing there with a video game. Well, the idea is that. The idea is to send the rapist?

No, the brainwashed tape. The idea is, let's make a Manchurian candidate. Yes, exactly. They, they... This movie basically now becomes a remake of the Manchurian candidate where you can see throbbing dick pulses at every point. Well, this becomes my thing. Like, Zeus is a big fighter.

They go, the Battle of Tough Guys takes place in, like, a steel mill at one point with a guy having a giant wrench. And Zeus just destroys them as a... As the commentator says, this line, which I wrote down as well. It's just an all-out brawl. And the guy goes, never in the history of sport have I seen such incredible competition.

There's a man wielding a giant, like, tire iron and another man shoving his head into, like, steel vats. But here's the crazy thing about getting the idea that way. He's... What's happening in the scene that burrs this idea is that guy's filming a television. Yes. Of a show that he produces. Of a show that he produces.

I'm becoming quite a shutterbug. You would think that Kurt Fuller would have just gotten the idea by being a network television and staring at TV all day. Because he's thinking in his mind he's like, oh, I can use this camera to make tapes for Zeus. Or I could use all of the cameras at my disposal as the head of a television network to do the same. Like, why does it take this little camera?

all your shortcomings. This, now we got, this is where we're going to have to unpack the majority of this. The love scene, the hotel scene. Okay, so. Hands down, amazing. Jones Severance and Rip go on an

overnight. But it's basically like it happened one night, sort of. They put up the Yep. They close off the room a little bit. They're like, well, blame your management for booking us one room. and then she's in the bathroom

here's what drives me crazy she's brushing she's stripped down to her bra and for some reason the sexiest grandma panties I love that outfit it was like they're pulled up literally she's wearing satin bloomers I have a picture of it

pulled up to her fucking rib cage they look great wait you have a picture to call them panties it's like they're just a really short miniskirt because I think I think Hulksters saw her in regular panties and said it's a family affair

yeah Hey, this is supposed to be a family affair. Oh, you have the whole scene. I have the whole scene. Oh, fuck it. Let's all shut up. Let's all shut up. Everybody shut up for a second.

All of your dreams are coming true, audience. It is amazing. Here we go. I want to wear tie-dye in this, brother. Here she comes. Can you get the lights? You got it. like your accommodations

do I have a choice it gets brighter it gets brighter why does it get brighter what is she wearing look at that outfit and as long as you stand your side of the bed everything will be fine and then we have another

I have another sequence. I have another sequence coming. Play it right away, because is this the, is this the... Yeah, yeah. Okay, why don't you go straight into what's next? I'm going to. Thank you. So they're getting into bed and she starts to hear a noise. And here we go. Your eye, this is amazing. I like that she tries to listen more. What is with those panties? Don't wait up for me. Yeah.

sexy saxophone playing on this song. I didn't know what she was looking at when she first I still don't know. It's his heels. It's both his heels, but are they supposed to be a butt? I thought they looked like knees, though. I genuinely was confused

by what part of his body that was. It was very hard. For me. Keep in mind, everything you hear someone say is the best take. I just full of a quick pick

for the audience. That was going to be the original poster Just a shock in his ass Did she book them in one hotel room on purpose? No, no, that's what... No, her office messed up. The bad guy was like... She's like, and you booked us in one hotel room.

Wait, can I ask a question, legit? What is the relationship between her and Kurt Fuller? That's what I do. He says at one point... Has he put her in place at this other network? Yes, he has, Jason. Oh, wow. She's basically, it's basically the story of Matahari.

What agent? What do you mean that he got her from an agency? I don't know. To be a TV executive? That's correct. What are you talking about? Oh, hey, I got this. You're going to be a model.

You're a model. You're a beautiful. Okay, I need you to go in and seduce Rip. Okay, you're going to be a network executive. Hey, guys, she's already a touring agent. June, everybody. Quick question. They fly on a jet to go to that soul food restaurant to stay in that one,

hotel room and that's it there is no explanation they're literally like they're literally like they get on a fucking jet go to a soul food restaurant with the pie fight it's a prop plane oh hey airplane

guy shut the fuck up most of our live audience are aviation experts at the end he's going to explain the jet okay so it's a prop plane they take a prop plane where is Malaysian flight 320

but by the way there's literally there's never any explanation of why they're going to this far away terrible restaurant the end he slaps her as well this is another

this is another scene where jones severance is confronted by Kurt Fuller he's pissed at her that she didn't bone rip and he slaps her across the face in front of Pamer and Pamer and Pamer Jr., and they do nothing

everybody's like we're cool with this Well, they saw him break that glass globe in the beginning. I should have brought this up when we were talking about her panties. I don't think that, upon reflection, that I just want you guys to understand, those weren't underwear that she was wearing underneath her clothes. They must be. No, they're not.

Severance, underpants, apologist. No, they're not. Wait, a second. Wait, what do you mean? That's underpants. There were night-time dressers. You don't wear a bra to bed like that. Sometimes you do.

Do you think Joan Severance knew she was supposed to seduce Hulk? Or do you think Kurtful was just... Ooh, that's a toughie. Can I ask a question that I thought was really insane? We intercut, they're in a motel room, and the Hulkster is out putting on the cheesecake shorts, and Jones Severance is in her bra, and they're listening to each other,

and she starts brushing her teeth in the bathroom, and he starts brushing his teeth in the hotel room where there is no source of water. For a long time in the intercut and she's by a sink and he's not by any source of water brushing his fucking teeth. And his plan was to hold it.

Like, because he's like, who's holding it in his mouth, the way where he leaves the bathroom. And then he has to go, like he swallows it. Yeah, it's gross. Oh, wait. I think the reason they did this trip,

oh no, forget it, disregard. No, I'm wrong. But why there's no reason they go there. Except to throw pies at some poor people. I thought the trip was for the charity event, but it was. No. No, it wasn't for the charity event.

Long story short, Zeus paralyzes Hulk Hogan's brother. Whose name is Randy. And in any other movie, Randy would be the villain. Yes. Like, as soon as you see Randy, he's like to sweep the leg guy.

Yeah. But in this movie, he's the guy. He's the guy you love so much. And Hulk does some serious acting here and breaks out in full on tears when he sees his brother, paralyzed, at which point I go, you know it would be great if they remade this exact script with Ryan Gosling? I think that it's like, it's like you see this guy, like he's fighting,

he doesn't want to get involved in this, and then he gets pulled in. It would be great. I would love to see that. We have so many good ideas for how to redo this movie. Yeah, so his brother is paralyzed. This is, we have skipped over the rapist, but I think we've covered it pretty much. No, no, no, no, no. We can't skip over that. Yeah, so Joan Severance fails them. The Hulkster shows up on a motorcycle that's never been introduced before. Scoops up the guy the guy's about to like pulls her off so he her bra again, which feels like it was a note.

And then scoops him up on the front of the motorcycle and drives him into like a fucking garbage dump, it basically kills the guy. Yes. Casual murder happening everywhere. Everywhere. And then he runs over to Joan Severnson goes, God, I hate it when you're hurt. Wait, wait. He says

you're right. God, I hate it when you're hurt, period. Or scared, period. And she says, I know. see this is the first time he ever saw her hurt and or scared by the way a lot of their serious conversations are blocked and staged on the ground yeah so this one and then before this one before when she comes out of that conference with um what's his face they have a full conversation where she reveals herself on what she's done on the floor of hulks mansion and they just start kissing and they've never kissed before and it's not even that romantic yeah yeah They kissed, like, a couple that's been going out for a couple years. It's very anticlimactic. Oh, their first kiss. Their first kiss is very anti-climactic, right?

It's a family affair. I was like, did I miss when they became a couple? Wait, obviously. And I'm really sorry to go back to this. They have the apathy of they don't care about each other anymore, almost. Now I'm thinking that Kurt Fuller's character must have owned the other network. What now? Wow.

In what world could he... This is turning into end-night chablon stuff. No, June. How could he place this random woman? We're on the other side of the looking glass now. How can he place this random woman in that position? That's what I'm asking. That's what I'm asking.

But if he owned the other network, he wouldn't need, he has the number one TV show. If he owned the network, he doesn't need to hire her a TV show. He doesn't need Battle of the Tough guys. I don't have all the answers. But how else would he have gotten her in that post? I have no idea, especially if she was like a model. from a service. But Kurt Fuller, basically,

everything he does in this movie to get a wrestling TV show is a hundred times more fucked up than anything the Joker would do. Yes. And a hundred times... It's like the Joker would never do that. Yeah.

That's too fucking crazy. He has no moral compass. No. It is because he got to be the number one... Some men just want to watch the world burn. I know... I know I'm jumping ahead now, but I do think we have to at this point.

We do, we do. The crazy thing about Kurt Fuller's character is that when, that fight is happening at the very end between Zeus and Rip. Can I just have one thing? So Hulk Hogan finally says, all right, I'll fight Zeus because my brother's paralyzed.

What is it? Randy? Randy. Oh, yeah. In a traction basically. He's basically dead. Yeah. He can't get up. Randy is the kid brother of Hulk goes. So Zeus then goes on a tear of training with the Manchurian

tape, the Machary candidate tape. He's like training really hard. Hulk is just helping her to rehabilitate his brother. No training in the training montage. And by the way, Zeus is, like any good fighting trainer will tell you, the best thing to do is punch and blow up cinder blocks. Yeah. Because it gets you just your whole body ready.

You just want to hit the cinder blocks as hard as you can. And Zeus has been shown in this movie. To be the most powerful man of all time. Like, there is no rhyme or reason. The only backstory we get on Zeus is, I used to train him. He went to prison because he killed somebody. now he's out. Like, we don't know what happened.

But he is all-powerful. The Hulk doesn't train. It's like a Rocky movie with no training. Hulk, I will say this. And this is what I couldn't figure out is... His training is stopping rapes with a motorcycle. And I actually thought that that was an interesting choice. Which one?

He doesn't train. The fact that he doesn't train and that it's sort of mental training of him helping his brother, which will come back later on when he sees him and has to really call on those emotions. I think it's unfair how kind you just were to this film. I thought it was an interesting choice. You just actually made this sound

like a noble work of art. Don't you feel like, yes, Zeus paralyzed Randy, but... Traction. Yes, Zeus tractioned Randy. But, and Hulk wants revenge, yes. But by going on Battle of the Tough Guys

to fight Zeus, isn't Hulk, A, breaking his contract with his network? That's a good point. His word is not his bond. Exactly what he won. Yes. The number one show and higher ratings than ever before. This makes me crazy.

He's playing right into his hands. Because when, spoiler alert, when Rip starts to beat the shit out of Zeus, Kurt Fuller rushes over to the transmission and starts smashing the reel-to-reel that's podcasting. This is what makes no sense because from the beginning all Kurt Fuller wanted was for Rip to be on the network. Yeah. The second he is, he smashes up the... Real to real. Because his thought is, if he beats Zeus,

then no one will tune in next me for Battle of the Tough Guys. So he needs to keep the ambiguity going. I felt bad because you can see Kurt Fuller's on the other side of the glass while Tiny Lister and the Hulkster are fighting for obviously four or five days of coverage. And have you ever been in like the background of a scene where they're just like, Just keep screaming, brother. Kurt Fuller's screaming for what must. have been five days straight.

I will also say about this fight. The whole movie is like wrestling is too, like even though it's real in this movie, it's two stage. We want to go and get the real tough guys and the bars and the steel mills and all these like in the aircraft carrier factory, whatever it is.

But then the final fight is the most, it was crazy. It's like the shittiest version of the WWF. All of it. Like it's on the Morton Downey Jr. talk show set. And it's worse than the first fight. Like the first fight, Rips Home Network wrestling broadcast, is still

far in a way the most glossy classyest fight. It's still a piece of garbage. For some reason, all of the turnbuckles are jiffy pop things. It's the most fucked up looking thing. And this is what I wanted to talk about in this part. So at the beginning of the match, it's no holds bar, June. No holds

bars. Any hold you want to make. You can do it. And at the beginning, they go, the ref is now checking the turnbuckles. Why? They let people in with lug ranches. They fought in steel mills. They have no rules.

Why do you have to check the turnbuckles? It is weird. They make that announcement. Yeah, they make the announcement. This is the only no rules. We got to make sure everything is up to par. I kind of thought, it felt like this last, this last fight, though, was not a part of Battle of the Tough guys.

What now? No, no, they introduced it as Battle of Tough guys. Not only that, there's like the dumb announcer who would be me if they made it now comes out, and it's like, welcome to the battle of the tough guys. Zeus punches him out of the fucking ring for no reason whatsoever. That's what we call friendly fire. By the way, how did they even...

Like, that was my whole thought was how did they even communicate with Zeus throughout this whole movie. So the fight tomorrow is like... Just show up like a half hour early. Do you want to put oil all over, or do you want to just go, or do you want to eat something, or you want to just be ready to go? And then also, if I was Zeus's trainer, and I know it doesn't have trainers,

but I'd say, Zeus, stop celebrating and just make sure the guy that you just knocked down is down. Because Zeus's Achilles heel is that. Is just celebrating

with his back turned to the person he has just knocked down. The whole movie is just based on Hulk is going, uh, hitting his leg.

Oh. It's also, this fight takes place in a venue that over the course of the fight is completely demolished. Like everything, the ring is demolished. For some reason

all of the extras are in prom dresses. Yes. They're just like, whatever you want a prom, I swear to God, we're on day 40. Just fucking wear your prom dress and beer at 545. Pretty and Pink was shooting across the hall. Just come on over. Just get, we wrap like a new in a direction. By the way, this is my last words

on earth. Show up in 545. I would not be surprised if all of this movie was shot like in and around like WWF headquarters in Connecticut. Oh, of course. You know what I mean? Like if it was all just like random spaces that they owned because it looks

terrible. Yeah. Did anyone else notice that Joan Severance is reading a book in the in the montage where Randy's getting rehabilitated. She's sitting in the hospital room when he first flutters his eyes open.

And I believe she's sort of covering it. But I believe the book title is Men Who Can Love. Did anyone else see it? I so hope that's true. And it's just a list of men's names. It's definitely a self-help book. It's not a novel. Steve Johanson.

Peter Wagner. Michael Rimpley. Michael Rimpley. Richard's Kramer from Seinfeld. Apparently a really funny thing that happened was to promote this movie, they decided to bring Tiny Lister into the WWF, but he was never a wrestler and not very good. And he only did three matches,

and then they just said, no, no, you can't fight anymore. Because Zeus was very upset because, spoiler alert, he loses. At the end of this movie, he does not... He dies. Oh, no. No, no, he was alive. Great point. Kurt Fuller dies, I feel.

That was the casual murder? By the way, that's the other great thing. So he kills Zeus, it seems like, throws him to the stage. Everybody's pretty excited about that. Because this is basically this whole movie's like a lynching, as far as I can tell.

Then, everyone, women, children, Kurt Fuller's in the booth. He's ripped up the fucking reel-to-reel that broadcasts television. Yes. And the wires explode, and like, the hulkser throws a chair

through the window. and everything explodes. Kurt Fuller, like, is electrocuted violently to a huge crowd of children and women. They watch an adult man burned alive by electricity. Their reaction must be one of horror, right? Nope. Honkster turns around and goes,

he shoots... Why do we care? Remember how we all just watch that adult man burned alive by electricity? What happened was it cooks our system, which is basically electrical. But what I love about it, too, is like, it's just a cheat because they can't make Hulk kill a good guy. Like, I feel like it was like, he couldn't do it. No, but he kills him.

Oh, he kills him. No, no, that man is straight up. Oh, dead. At the end of this move. By the way, so is Zeus. I don't know what Zeus is. Zeus is fucking dead. He throws him 30 feet into a fucking hole in the ground.

And he doesn't move. There's no shot of Zeus, like, twitching. is dead. This is fucking dead. Do you guys, you guys want to think I guess on how much money this movie costs to make?

Yes. Yeah. Four million dollars. Anything? What did you say four? I said four. I'd say like seven. 25.

It was eight million dollars. On opening weekend, it made five million dollars. Came in number two to Indiana Jones in the last crusade. Wow. And, and total.

gross, 16 million. So it was a... Great news. Wow, way better than many of mine. I've got 15 under that. That's not bad. And the logline was no ring, no ref, no rules. However, they're all... Not true, not true.

Yeah, yeah. There's every one of those things in every battle. But okay. All of those things. Yeah. I want to run out to the audience. There are no real Amazon five-star reviews. They're all snarky. So I'd rather go to you guys and get from you guys some questions. Oh, we have a little bit. Let's get the house lights up. What are your questions about No Holds Bard?

Oh, my gosh, we have somebody that has something. Oh, my gosh, we got baby onesies over here. This is amazing. Look at this. Oh, this is hilarious. This is, how did this get made baby onesie? And then Jason, give me your baby baby onesy. These are amazing.

Thank you guys so much. Our baby will wear Jason Manzuka special at all points. All right, I went down the wrong side. Thank you guys so much. All right. you go. Okay. Your question. I'm going to go to you right here. Your name and your question. My name is Marianne. And my question is, at the restaurant scene, there's this whole interaction between the waitress. The waitress and ripped. And it's like, she's this really broad, black,

sassy woman stereotype. And she's like telling the woman Samantha, whatever, oh, you better keep him. He's a keeper. If I wasn't married, I'd get on that again or something. Like, it's just the weirdest interaction. It's probably because... No, Rip totally fucked that waitress. Yeah. 100%. And I think...

Oh, yeah. They fucked for days. There's a... There's a question about why, the point of that trip. Why did he see his ex-girlfriend? All right, this is... He's a... All right, this is amazing.

We have a question that has a very big... It's a lot. This is like a school project going here. It's like a chart. It's like a flow chart. Okay, here we go. Explain your flow chart. What's your name and what's your flow chart? I feel like Phrygnos up.

My name's Kyle and I want to be the first visual presenter for a question. Great. So it's good for the audio medium of podcast. In keeping with your theme. So Rocky and Rocky 3 fights Thunderlips, who is essentially Hulk Hogan, who is Rip. And it comes no draw. Let's pick this up a little bit. Okay, Rocky then fights Strago and Rocky ends the Cold War that way.

If Rip can beat Tiny Lister and Ice Cube can beat Tiny Lister, Can Ice Cube then end the Cold War, or more importantly, end the crisis in Crimea? It's an amazing. It was a very well-thought-out thesis. By the way, it's also provably true, yes. Can I just show that? Can someone just unravel that as I find? The president follows me on Twitter. Let's pitch this. Everyone can take a look at that. All right, let's see. What's your question? Can you guys talk about the scene when, oh, Jesse, hi.

Can you guys talk about the scene when he first meets Sam and while she's pitching ideas? Sorry, one more time I missed it. There was a big laugh in the middle of your thing. When he first meets Sam

and she's pitching all these things to him. Why don't you do this? What about more of this? What if my tour dates are lined up more with my... He has the craziest fuck-me eyes and he starts biting his thumb

and he's going crazy and she's just talking about whatever and that's all the scene is. But then, this is the weird thing about the scene because he's staring at her. lustfully for a while, but then when she gets really close to him,

he just stares off at the table. Like, it's so weird. I'm gonna fuck you, I'm shy. And then... And then she says, dinner, tonight, dressy. Ask me about my charity. Here we go.

You're... Come here. Your name, your wrestling name and your question. Here we go. Oh, my name is Kara. My wrestling name, be Margaret Thrasher.

And there's a point, I think, that is vital to make that Randy is played by Mark Pellegrino in this movie, who grows up to be Jacob from Lost. Oh, wow. Good point. I noticed that, too. Yeah. So important. But I also had a question about the banging of Hulk and Joan Severance.

Do we think that they actually filmed a sex scene that was so terrible it had to be cut from the movie, and that's why they go automatically to, like, the making out, like, they've always... I feel like it has to be so clean, right? think the hulkster was like it's a family affair yeah well as much as I would love to be four and a half inches into you shouldn't eat in that sushi semi semi hard due to a combination of a strange

cocktail that's pulsing through my body right now I'm not sure if you can see my heartbeat through my penis but you can I am curious about Hulk's well rip sleeping habits because in that scene it seems like she's been a sleep for a while. And he does push-ups

at the rate of 1,000 a minute. Oh, yeah. But also that's... 1,000 a minute. It's a little rude to be doing that in a shared bed. Right? Are we all agree to that? Yeah. Oh yeah, very rude. Very rude. Your feet could also be on the

desk, Rip. Or any chair, any, anything. All right, your question, your name, your wrestler name, here you go. My name is Danielle. my wrestling name will be How Long Wheels

and, um, okay, so one... That's a roller derby name. Um, so Zeus beats up, I mean, essentially puts his brother in a coma. Like, why don't they call the cops? Traction, traction. Like, why isn't Zeus being arrested for that?

Well, I guess as long as, as long as you're around Zeus, you're gonna get hurt. Yeah. Everyone is proven. If you get within arm's reach, he will hurt you, faceplant you, or break your back. Obviously, we had an opinion about this movie, but now it is time for a second opinion. Second opinions. From top to bottom, crazy movies are fun.

They're not your first, but they're going to be a second. From the dips of Amazon, they come. Second opinions for everyone. Second opinions. These are five-star reviews on Amazon. And now, like I said, I think a lot of them are facetious, but these are the least facetious or the best facetious I could find. This one is, what's that smell?

This whole Kogan classic tells the... This whole Kogan classic tells the story of Jesus Christ's fight against the Romans in a modern-day battle. Instead of the battlefield taking place in the days of old, our hero is getting crucified. The battle is in a bar and Hulk gets zoosified.

The creator may have rested on the seventh day, but on the eighth day, he made no holds barred. Five stars. By the way, what if Zeus is Zeus? That actually would be... That whole movie would...

Come down from Mount Olympus. Yes, and Athena bursts out of his forehead. This is a good one, and this is the one that I think could be real. I found the relationship between Rip and Joan Severance. I love that Joan Severance. She has no name. Lady, a person who called her Sam. To be morally satisfying.

They are separated by a sheet when they share a hotel room, and they provide an uplifting example for proper premarital behavior. Especially in panty size. the moral choices Rip faces mirrors our own struggles the ending will leave you cheering if not weeping at the heroism of Hulk Hogan

I initially hated the use of violence to drive home the moral message of good triumphing over corporate evil but since this is a wrestling and the violence in the movie is a good example of why wrestling is not fake it fits into the story what

it fits into the story as long as you can explain to your children that Rip was only using violence to beat the bad guys because they backed him into a corner and he had no other choice. Unless it's for God or country, that kind of violence should not be tried by anyone. I recommend this movie for kids and parents alike.

You will be entertained and uplifted. Especially when Kurt Fuller gets electrocuted in front of your eyes. Is there anything that you guys that we missed we can hit on in these last minutes here? Gary? What? June, talk more.

more about kids sports for kids because what happens is there's two children Greco-Roman wrestling in a field I'm gonna I'm gonna wager that sports for kids serves inner city kids or it seemed pretty rural it actually did see pretty rural it was like fresh air fun they take the inner city kids out let's take children out to a cornfield and make them wrestle against each other today you would go to prison for 50 years Now, can I just pitch one version of this? You would never be free again. You took these children to a field,

and then they wrestled each other in swimsuits? And then they're picked up by their instructor, one in each arm. The thing about this that I'll just say, to keep in our head, Hulk is at the height of his career. He probably does have a charity for kids. Why not just use the actual name in charity

because getting that word out there about that charity? Why not use his name? Brother. brother that's a kettle of fish this is the weird thing about him not using his name too is if he's trying to you would think they would want to promote this idea that the wrestling is real

so if they called him Hulk Hogan and we were able to see him actually fighting these matches we might buy into that a bit more absolutely 100% and it would be a big commercial for wrestling guys I just had a thought Vince McMahon

or not Vincent McMahon but but Jetty's Body is in this and the other guy. Mean Gene. Is this a world in which Hulk Hogan exists and is not as popular as RIP? Wow. Oh, we're starting to peel the onion. Yeah.

We're peeling the onion now. So, Rip may be like, yeah, Rip is like where Hulk wants to go. That's interesting. I wonder if this... Think about it. Think about it and write the prequel. Is it possible that this movie came out when

Hulk Hogan, the character, was a bad guy? Because there was a period in wrestling when Hulk Hogan was a bad guy. Very early on. Very early. Oh, that was early? Well, early in the career. You always come out like that and then you... Because I was thinking, oh, maybe people wouldn't have wanted that, if he was a bad guy, they wouldn't have wanted to see Hulk Hogan as the hero. I don't know. No, no. He was always the hero. Eat your vitamins, kiss your mother, Hulk Hogan.

I know, but there was a period where he went through being a bad guy, too. All right. That's Hollywood. There's got to be a wrestling nerd here, right? speak up tell me yeah too many of you shut up now we heard it was later later on he's like any rape

I see I'm going to stop with a motorcycle this movie was amazing thank you guys all for being here everybody watch it definitely watch right definitely watch this movie 100% watch it again and again Tom you have a child Would you show this to your child?

Not in a hundred million years. That was No Holds Bard. What an amazing show. Give it up for Tom Lennon. And a big thanks to Earwolf for all the help that they give us for this show. And all of our interns, for the longest time, I've been giving thanks to Averill Haley. That person does not exist. It's actually Averill Haley.

I've mispronounced her name so long. I am so sorry to you. But she pulls all of our clips. Thank you to her. Thank you to Nate Kylie, who does all. of our research. Thank you to Leanna Waldron, who does all of our amazing designs on our Facebook page, and Katie Dyer, who runs our social media presence. And of course, Cody Scully, who is the engineer for that night live at Largo. Thank you guys all. We'll see you

next time. Bye-bye.