I am Charles Schwartz Show - The Brutal Truth from a Super Bowl Champion - Setema Gali

Episode Date: October 8, 2025

In this powerhouse episode, Charles sits down with Setema Gali—former NFL Super Bowl champion turned elite coach, speaker, and entrepreneur—to unpack the raw truth about what it really takes to wi...n in business, leadership, and life. Setema shares his transformation from professional athlete to purpose-driven mentor, revealing how the same mindset that wins championships also builds unstoppable leaders. He dives deep into the “dragon-slaying” philosophy—facing hard truths, confronting excuses, and building habits that create sustainable success across every area of life. From calling out toxic comfort and fake positivity to breaking down the power of radical accountability, Setema and Charles strip away the fluff and expose the realities of high performance. Together, they explore the price of true transformation—why most people never achieve it, and how those who do build unshakable confidence, discipline, and integrity through consistent, uncomfortable action. This isn’t motivational talk—it’s a masterclass in mental toughness, ownership, and the psychology of winning long after the game ends. KEY TAKEAWAYS: -How Setema Gali transformed his identity from Super Bowl champion to world-class coach by redefining what real winning means -Why true greatness isn’t about talent or trophies—but about integrity, consistency, and inner mastery -The power of “dragon slaying”: confronting your fears, excuses, and self-sabotage to unlock purpose and power -How to lead yourself before leading others—through discipline, accountability, and emotional control Head over to provenpodcast.com to download your exclusive companion guide, designed to guide you step-by-step in implementing the strategies revealed in this episode. KEY POINTS: 01:05 – From the NFL to a new mission: Setema shares his journey from Super Bowl champion to transformational coach—while Charles highlights how reinvention begins when identity no longer depends on titles or trophies. 04:28 – Redefining what it means to win: Setema breaks down the difference between external success and internal fulfillment—while Charles reflects on how chasing validation keeps many high achievers stuck. 08:15 – The power of personal standards: Setema explains why discipline and integrity are the true markers of greatness—while Charles connects this to how leaders create culture through consistency, not charisma. 12:40 – Slaying the internal dragons: Setema reveals his framework for confronting fear, pride, and self-sabotage—while Charles notes how facing your “dragons” becomes the path to freedom and clarity. 16:10 – Leading yourself first: Setema emphasizes that leadership starts with self-mastery—while Charles points out that emotional regulation and humility separate good leaders from exceptional ones. 20:30 – Sustaining success through structure and spirit: Setema discusses how faith, family, and focus form the foundation of lasting achievement—while Charles ties it to the balance between grind and grace. 25:45 – Legacy over lifestyle: Setema closes with a call to pursue impact over image—while Charles reminds listeners that real success is measured not by what you gain, but by who you become.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to The Proving Podcast, where it doesn't matter what you think, only what you can prove. This one's been proven by a Super Bowl champion. I'm warning you right now, most of you won't like this. This is going to rustle most of your feathers, and we're going to talk about what it takes to motivate to succeed on the highest levels. And most of you are going to be pissed off. Anyway, the show starts now. Let's see if you can have this one. All right, everybody.
Starting point is 00:00:19 Welcome back to The Proven Podcast. I am excited to have our guests on. Thank you for joining this, man. Hey, man, I'm so happy to be here. Thank you for having me. Absolutely. For the four or five people on the planet that don't know who you are, Drew, tell us a little bit about yourself, what you've done the whole night nights.
Starting point is 00:00:36 You got it. My name is to Temangali. I am a coach, a mentor, a speaker, and author. I work with people, and I help them solve the most expensive, costly problems, whether it's financially costly or emotionally or on their relationships. I do a lot of keynotes speaking around the globe. I have clients. I coach youth football.
Starting point is 00:00:55 I've got three boys. and I love my life. I love my clients. And I love, right, there's a phrase we say that's like, if you want dragons blood on you, you got to slay dragons. And we slay dragons. Like that's, we confront things head on
Starting point is 00:01:11 and we go like full speed at it. That's what I do. One of the things I love about what you just said there was, you know, you slay dragons. And we were talking about this on the first call where you were connected, which was a no BS version of what it takes to actually slay a dragon versus the cute,
Starting point is 00:01:26 Let's rub some crystals on a tree and steam kumbaya. That's just not reality. If you're going to go do some things, you can do some things. For those of you who are not watching this, who are listening to this, there were two people on his couch. He is large enough. He looked like he ate the other one. This is a large man. And ironically, I think your boy you mentioned is even bigger than you are.
Starting point is 00:01:46 So. Like, I got a son who's like, he just passed him in height. So he's probably 6'5, 3.50. My older, my other son is about 6-2, 240, and then my youngest son is like 5, 7, 5, 8, about a buck 35. So he's coming. He's 13, but yeah, our food bill is astronomical, and I love it. Oh, you imagine. I love it.
Starting point is 00:02:11 So one of the things that I think you and I both love on a high level, it's just be really honest and in people's face. So let's get into what are some of the things that are complete and other BS that people believe about, like, hey, I want to be successful. make it to the NFL. I want to succeed. I want to have this financial this. What are some of the just complete BS things that's in their way of obtaining those goals? Yeah, I think one of them for sure is when people say like they, they're overly optimistic. Like, I believe in being positive and I believe in being optimistic. But when people are just, like, just keep believing and just like, you just believe. And I'm like, okay, look, even the Bible's like, faith without works is dead. So you could believe.
Starting point is 00:02:54 leave all day long, and I know people that even hide behind God. And when I say they, I got a picture of Jesus right behind me. Like, there's people who literally, they live in this fairy tale of just like, just do these few things. And it's all going to work out. And I'm like, no, it's not all work out. Like, you, if you want apples, you got to go get apple seeds. You got to There's arrow the ground. You got to plant the seeds. You got to make sure the soil is good. Then you got to protect the seed.
Starting point is 00:03:27 Then you got to nourish it. And even then, as good as, again, I believe in the law of the harvest. What you sow is what you reap. And even then, there's still so much that it's going to take. So one of this like, hey, just be positive. And again, I'm a positive guy. And then, you know, another one is whenever people say, well, it happens for a reason. I'm like, it helps because you make some dumb.
Starting point is 00:03:51 choice. Like, you made some really dumb choices. And so I'm not just having some, this is like Mamba mentality. This is like MJ. This is Tom Brady's. This is like, this is what it takes and it's going to be hard. And let's just, let's just call it what it is. You aren't good enough right now.
Starting point is 00:04:12 Or you're not, I talk about this all the time. People are like, oh, I want to lose weight. I want to make a million dollars. I want to do this. I'm like, that's adorable. What are you willing to do? Are you willing to get up every morning at 4 o'clock in the morning and run? Are you willing to cut sugar and shit out of your diet?
Starting point is 00:04:26 Because I'm a triathlete. I can't have as much muscle mass as you are because I would die on the run. I already have 17-inch calves. I can't do it as it is. But people are like, oh, I want to be a triathletian. I'm like, it's not complicated. Get up and put the miles. And it's like everybody wants, they want to.
Starting point is 00:04:44 Everybody wants the bigger home. They want the car. They want to be jacked and shredded. everybody wants to, but you do not get what you want. You get, in our language, you get what you are 100% committed to. In our language, commitment means you do what is required. You do what you say you're going to do. And you act decisively, regardless of thoughts, feelings, emotions, and moods.
Starting point is 00:05:14 And I'm like, you don't get what you commit to every once in a while. It's every single day and committing to do something means you got to cut a lot of stuff out. Like you talked about, you know, like you can't eat donuts all day and pizzas all day and fries all day. There's a sacrifice that is required and most people don't want to sacrifice. They don't. They don't want to give up the sugar. They don't want to give up the ease and the comfort. So this is why I love the conversation we're having, which is like, let's just be real.
Starting point is 00:05:47 you don't want it bad enough to cut things out. You don't want it bad enough to become a different human. And eating a salad and chicken for one meal is not going to get it done. Right. And I love you going to talk about being real. You know, people like, oh, I want to do this and I want to do this. I'm like, you can't even conquer the cookie jar. What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:06:09 I was like, you haven't even gotten past that. And there's nothing wrong with that. This is where you are right now. Mazzle tough. If you're like, hey, I'm not willing to cut out the sugar. I'm not willing to watch the videos, to read the books. You know, one of the people I'm working with right now, she's like, I've never read four books in a week in my life.
Starting point is 00:06:24 And I was like, and you're getting different results now, aren't you? She's like, yep, I'm like, okay, cool. Because it's just a matter of you have access to the data. Now, when people come to you and your clients, you know, these are high performers and do people want to change it, what are the normal struggles that they're facing? And then how do you have them, ironically, with the picture behind you, which is a live picture of Jesus.
Starting point is 00:06:44 What does there come to Jesus moment that they have? What are the things, like, what are the problems and how do you get them to have that come to Jesus moment? Well, one of the biggest things is even if you're performing at a very high level and you're making money, which they are. These guys are CEOs or CFOs or business owners, entrepreneurs. They run small to mid-sized businesses. You know, they're functioning. But it's almost like a functioning alcoholic. And again, I don't drink alcohol.
Starting point is 00:07:12 It's fine if you do. But I've had functioning alcoholics coming to my program. and it's like they can literally fool most of the world. So they're lying, they're pretending. And everyone kind of knows like, hey, this is our leader. They've got money. And so I always take it into physical, spiritual, relational, financial, just four different domains of life.
Starting point is 00:07:36 So my clients, they might be doing great with their business at the cost and at the expense of disconnected from. spouse and children, disconnected from purpose and meaning and fulfillment, and possibly they're grossly overweight and obese. Like that there's some type of wreck really misbalance here. And so what I do is I look him straight in the face, right, and there's like nice, warm, loving set up,
Starting point is 00:08:06 and the guy you'd see it like the football game, hey, right? And then there's, I don't care what you think about me, you are asking me to help you. And the only way to help you is to punch you in the throat. 100%. And I mean, like, when I say, like, I have CEOs that are like,
Starting point is 00:08:29 or clients that are like, no one ever talks to me like this and, like, makes me feel this way. I'm like, because I don't care. Right. So we confront things head on. We have some real words. And it's like,
Starting point is 00:08:45 you shake them so hard, all of the facades and all of the masks, they begin to fall off. And that's like what I do with clients is just, let's get real. Let's tell the, I'm going to ask you some real questions and don't lie to me. So we talk about this in hammer versus hug. And sometimes I get to be hammer and sometimes I get to be the hug. Most people need that hammer at first to move them out of where they are. You mentioned you asked some real questions. What are some of the questions that you've asked people,
Starting point is 00:09:15 that have created that, for lack of better term, that hammer, that movement, that pivot, that they will drop the mask off. Yeah. So I'll just create this agreement with them up front, and I like to frame every conversation. So when I get on with someone, and I've done this, I do this all the time,
Starting point is 00:09:30 I say, listen, we're about to have a very powerful conversation. Let's not waste time and play pretend, and let's not stay on the surface. You do that everywhere else in your life. So can you agree to be radically honest, brutally transparent and completely real with me yes or no and most people go ahead I'm gonna say what most will say yes but it's not a real yes like I sure sure absolutely how do you get past that the bullshit yes well then it's funny because I'm like they
Starting point is 00:10:04 if I can tell you can always tell you can you can tell when someone's not on yes doesn't really mean yes they're just saying yes and I'll say look I'm just gonna say again. Yeah. And I just pause and I just look at them. Like, we don't got time because the person who referred you to me that you were going through some tough times, like something difficult. So I'm going to ask you some real questions.
Starting point is 00:10:32 All I'm asking you is do not lie to me, tell the truth, and I will help you. Do you understand? And they're like, yes. And sometimes I will come right out the gate. and depending on if they filled something out, I've got some information. So sometimes I'll just ask them on point blank. What's going on in your marriage?
Starting point is 00:10:53 Real talk. And then, again, I know the first question I ask, most people, they stay a little bit surface. And then I start to pierce and I start to dig and I start to dig. I'll point blank ass people. Like, are you cheating? What's in your bank account right now? Are you lying?
Starting point is 00:11:11 What was the last lie you told? And if I can get them to be so, real and so honest right up front, man, like, we just move so fast because for the first time in their life, they're having this come to Jesus' mom, right? I love the picture there. They're having this, like, the prodigal son of the, like, I'm woken up. Like, the prodigal son in the story, he's like, takes all the inheritance, he goes, and he spends it all. And now he's like, I'm eating with the pigs right now. This is horrible. Time to go home. So if you can be so real and pierce like piercing people want to actually tell the truth they just don't know how and
Starting point is 00:11:50 there's usually not an environment when they can do that. I also think people don't have people that hold them accountable on a high enough level and they know that if this person does hold me accountable, there will be some sort of cost benefit for it. So, you know, with my clients, I'm like, how long have you been cheating? I'm like, we're going to get past it if you're cheating. But we're way beyond that. How long have you been cheating is that your goal?
Starting point is 00:12:10 If that's what you want, I love that. It's not my marriage. I'm not sleeping with you. I don't care. And I think having that disconnect of, I don't care. I'm here to serve whatever your truth is, is important. Now, a lot of this, people, and I'm curious what your thoughts are, there's so many people who want to change and have a certain level of willing,
Starting point is 00:12:31 but don't actually make the change. What has been the factor that you've seen when people come to you, the no BS of what people actually start taking the action and implementing and creating the changes of the lives that they want. One of the things that normally is the trigger for that, that you'd say. Yeah, there's, I would say there's two real big, important things here. Number one is there's a thing that I call default future. It's default.
Starting point is 00:12:54 Like, basically, if you continue to do what you're doing, where will you end up? And most people, they painted a false future. So, for example, if they're eating garbage and they're not spending time with their children, and they're working 60 to 70 to 80 hours a week at the expense of all these. I'm like, where will you be? And in their mind, they're like, you know, I won't be as close to them. I was like, excuse me? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:22 You are so delusional. You're delusional. Let me paint the picture. You will be sitting on a couch with no kids, no grandkids, eating a can of Pringles in a tiny or maybe your huge home. You will be miserable. That is, your kids would refuse to come see you unless they want your money. And even then, some of them will. And when I can paint this, like, face the reality of the default future, it's like,
Starting point is 00:13:53 and then, I mean, I'll just hit him, hit them straight with it. Like, or if you continue to do what you're doing, you will be financially broke. You will be destitute. You will be discouraged. You will be depressed. And you might even continue, like, taking your life. You might consider that. And you might even do it.
Starting point is 00:14:08 Like, this is the path you're on. Are you okay with that? And when people are like, like, it's like this wake-up moment. Like, I don't want that. It's regret. That's one of them. The other thing really is,
Starting point is 00:14:25 it's just getting them to have a wake-up moment. I'm like, you got to give something up. And they're like, what do you need? Like, you can't keep doing this over here and doing this over here and hoping to get, like, something has to be given up. so I can give them an example, like, again, the physical one's like, you're fat.
Starting point is 00:14:44 Like, I'm telling, like, you're obese. You think you look good. Let me show you a pick. Go take your shirt off and take a picture. And then I can show them an older version of them and then the current version. And they're like, I'm like, you look horrible. And again, that's not just in the physical domain. So when people get the truth, Jesus really had it straight when he said the truth will set you
Starting point is 00:15:05 free and the truth hurts. The truth is painful. and people actually really don't want to know the truth because it sucks. They want to listen to the motivational tapes and they want to listen to the books and they want to write little cute quotes but they don't want to do the fucking work.
Starting point is 00:15:20 They don't want to dig it. Oh my gosh, the quotes are killing me, man. Yeah, they drives me out of my mind because people will sit there and like one of my clients goes, because whatever I'm not choosing or something along the line. I wrote it down because it piss me off. It says, whatever you are not changing,
Starting point is 00:15:36 you are choosing. I was like, that's a great quote. that's really cute that's a really good one what did you change now huh i'm like wait did you just said whatever you're not changing you're choosing so what changes have you made they're like uh-uh i wrote the quote on my law i posted it on instagram i'm like you're in my way now because that's what i don't care what you say i only care what you do i only care what you execute with and i found that when pain and this is what you're doing what i call future focus but the future of life when you show someone that their pain now exceeds their comfort level
Starting point is 00:16:08 instantage change every single time. But if you're in a situation where you're still comfortable with the level of pain that you're at because it slowly is crept up, you're not going to make that change. What are some of the things, and I'm curious from what you've run across, the things that have made the most change in people's lives. Like you've seen these radical results to be able to sustain it. Because change in a couple minutes is adorable. It's cute, it's nice, and you think you want some award, and then you go back to your old patterns.
Starting point is 00:16:34 How do people sustain? How do you get people to do that? So one of the things that's helped people the most is when you put them through physical pain. So, you know, like these business owners, they sit in their nice booted and suited clothes and they're important and then got authority and power. And then we would run them through immersion and then I'm picking them up at five is very militant. Now, I've never been military, but I've seen militant and I have so much respect. And so I've been in high-level sports, high school collegiate professional. So there is something about physical pain and having people connect, like, I just carried
Starting point is 00:17:21 an 80-pound bag for four and a half hours. I just ran miles upon miles, even when I'm like about, and I think I'm going to die. when people go through pain and I can connect what they're going through physically to now what they want to experience financially or relationally. And I can make that tie and then I can remind them of some of the tools and the models like, this is what we did. So you're going to go home. I like first things first.
Starting point is 00:17:54 And then we get practical. Like it's hard to go run a marathon if you don't have water stations throughout and you don't have gels. Most people try to go change their life eating cheese and crackers. Like, dude, you got to fuel your body. You got to fuel. You got to sleep. You got to have shoes.
Starting point is 00:18:09 You got to, like, this is preparation. So a lot of times with our people, what gets some mistake is I'm like, let's put you in the environment. Go home. Someone wants to lose weight. Go home. FaceTime me. Show me your pantry. That's about $1,500 of stuff that needs to go.
Starting point is 00:18:26 Oh, but my, but I was like, look, you told me you wanted to. to change. Oh, but I got this relationship, like, you need to cut, block, block on, you need to get rid of that. You need to probably get rid of the TVs and, like, people are not ones to get drastic. Well, then the comforts of life just pulling back in and where I've seen the most change with people is, you know, again, Jesus said something about, if thy right hand offend the cut it off.
Starting point is 00:18:58 people need to cut people out of their life people need to sleep not sleep with their phone next to them because they're glued to their phone online then they wonder why they're so tired then they caffeinate and and numb and do all i'm like guys these these changes are simple so what i found that works is we give people a system an operating system and an environment where if you follow these things you decrease the chance of relapsing now it's like the alcoholic you got it done all the alcohol out. You got, like, if that's what, again, I got a number of clients. They got to dump the alcohol. They got to avoid the barge. They got to get rid of those people. You got to go to the support groups. And then you got to fill it back up with exercise, with fruits, with vegetables,
Starting point is 00:19:44 with just different things. People don't understand, like, we're talking about radical change. And they don't want to do that. So that's why they keep lapsing and they stay in debt and they stay in mediocrity. I'm like, now the people who, like, again, I don't know why I keep feeling the state, but there's even people in script. It's like, get up and move.
Starting point is 00:20:05 Leave. Get out of where, like, leave where you're at. And people don't want to do that because they're too comfortable, which tells me you really don't want what you say. It sounds cute. It gives you a, don't mean dumb, but you don't want it.
Starting point is 00:20:18 Oh, on that cute quote you keep posting and all the quotes you post on your social media, is like, get out of here. Show your results. Show me the first. fruit right show the results yeah i love the idea that pain breeds confidence there's so many times when you're doing things that like i didn't know i could do this i've got to push through it and the other thing is that you know you're talking about a purge and it's one of my favorite things to do on a
Starting point is 00:20:42 plane ride is i will sit there because i can't there's no internet access on the plane most of the time and i'll be like block block block block block block block block block i'm like all these people you don't get to be in my life anymore and if you're not ready to to i hate this expression because it's a wrong expression but if you're not ready to burn your ships you're not going to get it That's just the reality. And there are people, and I love that you go through people's pantries and say, get a trash back. You want a different life. And one of the things I do is I say, you know, here you are, what are the clothes that this ideal version of you?
Starting point is 00:21:10 Because we created this horrible version of you. Here it is. You're going to be sitting on your own eating cringles. What is that person where? Awesome. What is this person where? Cool. Go in your closet and go find me that outfit.
Starting point is 00:21:21 And they'll come in and like, I don't have that. Cool. Go get a garbage back. What do you mean? I'm like, I'm throwing out everything you own. And I don't think people understand that's what real change takes. And for you, and this is why we all along so well from the very beginning, I was like, okay, he's not full of shit.
Starting point is 00:21:37 He's actually done it. He's dug it. So what are the things that have created like to sustainable stuff, right? Like, okay, we go in, we purge it. And let me give you an example. In my home, I have a little clock that controls lamps, that turns lamps on and off. You know those? It's connected to my internet devices.
Starting point is 00:21:54 So at 10 o'clock at night, all the internet in my house, shuts down. There isn't any, hey, I want to get on my iPad. I want to get on my phone. There's no more internet in the house because at 10 o'clock, I'm getting off my devices. It doesn't turn back on to the morning. It's a $6 solution. It forces me to get out of my own way. What are some of the things that you've implemented with your clients that have helped them? Because again, willpower is a finite resource. We all know that. We don't always feel like working out. And sometimes we just, we fall off track and then we've got to catch back up no matter who you are, unless you're Kobe. Um, how are the things, what are the things that you've implemented with clients that have helped
Starting point is 00:22:29 them stay on track to get to those goals? So number one is a big one with all of our clients. And I've never heard that one for him. Like, that one's brilliant. Dude, that's, I'm going to go implement that now. So like my kids, right? But for us, it's like all phones, no phones going rooms, right? All things get shot off at like eight, nine o'clock.
Starting point is 00:22:49 You have to remove because that right there, that domino, if someone's up on their phone all night, they, they, they don't sleep well. Then they binge. Then they, then they don't work the next day. So that's one. Right. Well, I'm like, just that simple thing of remove, even if you work, take your cell phone, put it in another room, leave it in your car. And they're like, but I got, but I got, I was like, but you got what? If you're, nobody has easy access to you. That means you never get into deep work. And if you never get into deep work in the modes of being able to really execute me productive, you're working about probably 90 minutes a day while you're at like you're checking, you're wasting time. Another one is the non-negotiable of like you can't even
Starting point is 00:23:37 start work until your workout's done. And they're like, what? I'm like, go get the workout at it and tell me how you feel. And so we tell guys to find workout partners. And it's, I mean, For me, it's so ingrained, probably like it is for you. Like, we're going to work out no matter what, but people who are not used to that, I'm like, you need a group and you need a return and report to us, and you don't get to work, you don't get to do anything in your job where you make money until you do this. And they're like, holy crap. I'm like, yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:12 So when you can implement these simple things, these simple protocols, and then it becomes habit. And then all of a sudden, these guys are like, dude, I have to work out. Like, I know. That's what it is. That's a good life. It's like, when you eat and you fuel your body and there's no junk food in the pantry.
Starting point is 00:24:29 And when you're tempted, again, another one is I just tell people, look, have some, have some simple, either cream of rice or some protein powders. When you are tempted to eat whatever your junk food is, that's your go-to. I promise you, you, again, this is science. You eat the right foods of the day. After a while, you just don't crave. The garbage, but breaking that gravity, right? That rocket ship expends all the fuel to break gravity. The clients need that.
Starting point is 00:24:58 So those are some simple things, from the phone to the food to the exercise. We just need a few simple triggers in place. And if they can execute those consistently, the cravings disappear. Again, like, I've been doing a bodybuilding. I used to eat ice cream every night. Like, every night. Like, not too bad, and I could still be okay. I'm like, no.
Starting point is 00:25:20 Like, what happened within those first probably two weeks, I craved it. Oh, my God, yeah. Like, I noticed as I ate super clean, it's so true, all the food that people eat, it is laced with the additives that make you more hungry. But when you eat chicken and rice and lean ground turkey and rice and steak and potato, you really just don't give a dang about those foods because they're so blind, your body transforms, and then when you go back to eat sugar, like, you feel so sick. The same thing happens with people in the workout and or executing work and high value targets
Starting point is 00:25:59 in their business. It's amazing how small and simple things like you just talked about right there with the internet, you dig? It's just like, and once you've done it, you're like, I don't want to go back. I don't want to go back to the way that I used to live. No, 100%. I think, you know, people don't understand that you don't need to have the willpower throughout the entire day.
Starting point is 00:26:18 you only need willpower and little finite sections because I have the same problem I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs, but sugar for a long time for me, oh my God, because I don't know if people know this
Starting point is 00:26:28 and this is important, so there's a public service announcement. Ice cream lies. It says serving sides four, nay, dang, serving sides, one, I don't care what sides it is. I will pound the whole thing. It was bad.
Starting point is 00:26:39 So I don't spend all day going, I want ice cream, I want ice cream, I just make sure it's not in my house. But if I cross it, when I'm walking outside, and there's a store, or I just need willpower for about five, ten seconds. I can get willpower from five to ten seconds. I can do it.
Starting point is 00:26:53 I'm like, I get by it. The other thing that I found, because people want tactical here, sourcrap, huge, because your gut biome, there's different type of biomes in your system. So you're the bacteria in your stomach. There are some that feed off sugar, and there's some that feed off other healthier things. When I went through a purge, I had to bring fermented food. So sauerkraut, which I do not like the taste of sourcrow, but I don't care.
Starting point is 00:27:15 I'm not eating for me. I'm eating for you my. for my system, by bringing sauerkraut in the morning, with a sudden, every single one of the sugar cravings I had, because I replaced the bacteria that was in my gut. So my gut biome actually changed. The other thing is understanding, and I'm curious what you think of this,
Starting point is 00:27:34 everyone thinks that time is your most valuable asset. It is not. It is never going to be your most of it. You're completely wrong. I spent eight years in a hospice watching people die. There are people who had polio, who were paralyzed from the neck down, who lived for 90s,
Starting point is 00:27:47 years. They had lots of fucking time. They don't have any health. Health is the only thing that matters. And right now, Florida just got rid of vaccines. We're not going to get political on that. Polio is no joke. So if you get injected with that stuff, it gets ugly. So your health changes the ball games. And then I think what I love what you said about the phone. If people have access to your phone, you're telling someone how much value and how much you value your own time by giving them limited assets to you access. I am not a doctor. When my family. I'm like, oh, you're going out of town. Like, I'm going on a trip on Sunday. I'll be out of the country. I'm like, yeah, but what happened is for your emergency? And I was like, well, I didn't
Starting point is 00:28:24 go to medical school, so you probably don't want to call me. You might want to call someone else. So we get the motivation. We get the patterns. We get the, you know, we're going to do things differently. Once someone gets to that tactical and they're like, okay, I've got it. I'm working out every day. Thank you so much. Now what do you do to step in and level up their businesses? And what did you do to level up their finances? How do you handle that? You got it. So I love just doing what we call current reality. So people start to get their life right. When you start to exercise body, your weights dropping, your habit, you're feeling better.
Starting point is 00:28:58 Like you're starting to spend more time. You're not addicted to work. You're not working 80 hours a week. You're not stressed and you're not taking it out on your family. Because a lot of guys think, I'm doing this for my family. Your family doesn't want to be around you because you're a horrible person to be around right now. Like you take it out on them because you know deep down in your mind, always going to be there, but you don't do that at work because HR is going to hit you
Starting point is 00:29:21 with something. You can get fine. So once people get to a place that's like, okay, I can breathe again, then I just say, okay, let's look at your current reality now. Let's look at where you're at now. And let's just look at the truth. What's the bank account? What's the money incoming in? What's your retirement look like? What is your income and cash flow? Okay, what is your current reality of your body? Hey, you've lost 30 pounds. Are you working out? And we start to look at the current reality and the trajectory now. And some people's trajectory looks way better. And then we just, all we talk about really simple is like,
Starting point is 00:29:57 there's small and simple things you got to do on a daily basis to keep you bulletproof. Let's see it. Like, maintain the workout. Maintain the healthy eating. Make sure you're marketing sales. And again, from producer to owner, right? Are you building a legitimate business where you don't have to work 24, seven. And again, this stuff takes time. Most people just stay working, working, grinding, grinding,
Starting point is 00:30:22 grinding. They make a lot of money, but they're not really doing anything. And I've found myself in that situation multiple times where I'm like, okay, I got to step back. Let me look at current reality. Let me create this projection of where I want to be. And then we just go back and sit, again, what we call necessary required actions, and let's execute. And it's the same, it's crazy. It's the same process again and again and again, right? You're this slowly. new levels, new devils. Okay, now that you're on a new level, now you've got some new problems. And now we've got to solve those problems, and then it's going to elevate you again. And then you're going to face new problems, and then we've got to solve those problems until you just
Starting point is 00:31:00 constantly and continuously optimize your life. I love what you said, that word. I don't believe people, but I do believe they're patterns. And so someone's got patterns of how they do things. We can look at those patterns. We can look at their current reality. We can project. something and now we can solve and it takes so much it takes real real conversation real truth like confronting things head on saying the things that people don't want to hear doing the things that they absolutely have been avoiding and it show them the cost that's another game changer like you show someone what it's really costing them to waste time over here or to do this over here the real cost,
Starting point is 00:31:47 oh, people are like, wait, I'm losing millions of dollars or hundreds of thousands of dollars, but more than financial,
Starting point is 00:31:56 you're losing your children, you're losing your marriage. It's brutally painful. So that's what we do. It's, and it's, then, simple. It really,
Starting point is 00:32:06 it's not easy, but it is simple to look at it and then you got to execute. There's a simple thing that you keep glossing over. So the, the listeners have heard it probably at this point. But you keep using the term we. And the idea is that the only way you're going to do this is if you have someone that hold you
Starting point is 00:32:23 accountable. And I have people all the time, but like, oh, I don't really need this or I don't really need that. I'm like, cool, have you done it? And they're like, no. I go, then you're lying to yourself. You need someone to hold you accountable. Because if you could do it on your own, like there are people like Kobe who do it on their own. I love it. They're one out of 80 billion people. It's the rest of us, we need someone to hold us accountable and to get us in the face and and to do that. So I love that you keep talking about, okay, we've reached this level.
Starting point is 00:32:46 Now we need to get to the next level because there's a new devil at every level. And it's just the nature of the beast. When you talk about necessary actions, because we all have these, and every level has different ones. And there's, God, I wish people would sit down
Starting point is 00:32:59 and have these honest conversations and I would realize how much connection, love, and finances they're losing. But when they sit there and say, hey, here are the real things that you need to do. These are the necessary actions.
Starting point is 00:33:09 What are the most common, let's say five, most common necessary actions that people have to do at different levels because if you're on the basic level and I'm trying to lead you here because the basic level is easy. Just get racist.
Starting point is 00:33:22 It's really simple. Don't eat anything white. If it's sugar, if it's carbs, if it's just don't drink it. Just don't eat. If it's white, don't eat. Just walk away. Sorry, it's bad.
Starting point is 00:33:31 Simple need. We all know what to eat. We all know that we need to exercise. So for those of you were playing at that level who are listening, just walk for 45 minutes every day. Make it a non-negotiable. Well, if it's raining, you're going to get wet.
Starting point is 00:33:42 If it's snowing, you're going to be cold. Just get over yourself. Just do it. Commit, and it's not about to walk anymore. It's about the can I keep a promise to myself? So at the very basic level, stop lying to yourself and get there. This isn't that conversation, because that you can Google anywhere. Have a nice day.
Starting point is 00:33:57 That's chat. What you do. Easy stuff. That's easy. Right. That's chat, GPD. You interact with individuals at a significantly higher level. These are high performance.
Starting point is 00:34:06 These are people who have been made of professional sports. These are Fortune 500 CEOs. These are elite individuals. These are elite individuals. What are some of the proven necessary things that you go, hey, this is what you need to do? I love that. So I'm going to add one more word before I answer this. So necessary, we call them NRAs, necessary required actions.
Starting point is 00:34:26 And so to answer this question, right, at a certain level, you have, like one of the things is there's constantly assessing, there's an assessment, where am I today? And if people don't do that, like it's easy to get stuck into what I call the comfort zone, comfort turns to complacent zone, complacent turns into this nose dive crash, and pretty soon you have a crisis. So we want to avoid the crisis and avert that by saying, okay, number one, let's do a consistent check-in. That check, and I call this like our generals tent, the battle is always won in the general's tent, which means, hey, at least once a week, you got to sit down and look back at the previous. this week. Hey, did we do what we said we did? Like, and I mean at a high level, because if you're not executing at a level that's going to put you on an upward trajectory, we're back to go walk for 45 minutes and tell me how you feel. So the return the report out of like this
Starting point is 00:35:26 planning, this general stance, so to speak, once a week is important. Number two is a constant looking into the future. Again, I think I heard this from, it might have been Gary V. I don't even, probably where he's like, our head needs to come up out of the dirt into the clouds. We've got to survey. We got to, you've got to look because at the level of an eight figure, a multiple eight figure, close to nine figure business, there's so many moving pieces that you're counting on dozens and dozens of your leaders. So it's fast, again, speed of the team, speed of the leader.
Starting point is 00:36:02 So this assessing, right, and adjusting and pivoting, like real time, where are we? here's what we were, here's what we want, here's where we are, we got to pivot. Another thing that I think is critical for these, I don't think, another thing that is, like, mission critical is the confronting of crucial conversations with people. High-end leaders, like top-in leaders, they don't leave these critical, crucial conversations for anybody. You got to have them. you have to have them
Starting point is 00:36:38 and it's not a text message it's not an email it's a you confront the reason why it's so important when a leader confronts his main people he is demonstrating to them he or she is demonstrating to them
Starting point is 00:36:52 this is how we handle stuff head on confront what I've learned is people who avoid confrontation and they want to go into complexity they're avoiding the very thing that would put them to the next level.
Starting point is 00:37:10 So they stay stuck. Critical, crucial, fierce conversations when something's not working, it's immediate. Because again, like, you know, the phrase, right, you don't, you can't turn the Titanic like you can't a VW bug. It takes a lot of movement to turn an organization. So those micro conversations are critical. Another thing that's important that I'd say for these guys is, it sounds like almost counterproductive, but I'm like, you've got to sharpen your saw, man.
Starting point is 00:37:42 Stephen Covey said, he was on to something when he's like, sharpen the saw. You know, if I talk, if I see two guys cut down a tree and one guy disappears for a couple hours every day, but he comes back, but he cuts down the tree faster, it's because his saw is sharp. And again, I'm not talking about self-care and pedicures and manicures. I'm talking about like real deep meditation,
Starting point is 00:38:02 real preparation. Give me a guy who's going to stop and prepare his day and then he's going to go farther than the person who just, let's go to work. Because at that level, the grind is not, the grind actually becomes counterproductive. There's not to be strategic planning and execution. It's like, again, this is, like, you're a solo guy. Just go work harder. You're going to make money.
Starting point is 00:38:30 But when you're over people and livelihood. and organizations and like branches and districts and like you got to have a strategy that is in alignment with where you're trying to go. And a lot of times even for myself, I hire mentors, I hire coaches. I have a team where we hold each other to these candid conversation. So those are a handful of things to me. It's like if you're doing that and then again, you're taking a step back looking at the big picture, like head in the clouds, where are we? at what's really going what's really going on what's really not happening that we got to have happen once we plan we put our face in the dirt and we go we execute and we faces in the dirt
Starting point is 00:39:14 like we're grinding we're working and every once in a while head comes up where are we is this really what we want you've heard the phrase that says hey don't don't build don't climb the ladder get to the top and be like oh the ladders gets the wrong wall i'm like that's a real thing where people build and work so hard and they get down the road and they're like, this is not what I wanted. That's why having clarity and head up in the clouds is so crucial. You got to make sure, is the path that you're on really the path that's going to lead you to what you really want?
Starting point is 00:39:49 And when you get to what you really want and you make that money or you get that thing, are you sure what's behind it is what you really want? And if it is, let's go get. get it. If it's not, we need to assess that before we spend years and months building a machine to solve a problem that really is not the problem. So there's a lot of thinking and conversation that goes into these systems. And if people are just like willing to submit to that process, it's a whole different level of capacity versus, hey, let's go walk for 45 minutes, stop eating sugar, stop eating, and you're good. No, this is like, we're trying to turn you into a high,
Starting point is 00:40:29 level, well-oiled machine with muscles and endurance, and you can handle the 120-plus bike ride in the marathon. Like, it's a way different game. Same in marathon. Same in bodybuilding. Same in business. Same in family. No, I agree.
Starting point is 00:40:44 And I think there's so many people that don't get it, that if you sat on a plane and the guy next to you said, oh, my God, I'm so excited. I wonder where we're going. You would freak out. You were like, oh, my God. You're like, okay, this is a problem. Well, people do that in their businesses. They're going to go, well, I'm just going to do it.
Starting point is 00:40:58 And I think, I know you've seen this, you can grind your way to seven figures. It is not that hard to make a million dollars. You can just put your head down a grind. It's going to cost you your health. It's going to cost you your family. It's going to cost your relationships. But yeah, you'll get to your seven figures. Also, don't have fun in that.
Starting point is 00:41:13 I love what you said about kind of disconnecting. And the military, it's called detach. You need to detach from the environment and put your head on a swivel for a second. But don't sit there and go, okay, it's not on the wrong ladder. I'd be on the wrong wall. So sitting down and really knowing where you're going, where that arrow is going to go before. hand is important. And I love that you mentioned that, you know, you have mentors as well. And I think it's, I would not be as far as I was or I am if it wasn't for mentors. And my
Starting point is 00:41:39 original mentors when I was broke were books. I would read the Stephen Coffey's and I did and I pay business. This is what I can afford right now. And then in time you hire someone because it's all about accountability. Having someone that gets in your face and has conversations that are not HR approved. Sorry, HR, I never get along with you. I am not HR approved. that are going to get in your face and hold you and just sit there and bark at you. It's that you are failing and you're choosing that. And that's okay if that's your truth. If that's where you want to go, I thought it's not going to affect models.
Starting point is 00:42:09 I wish you truly nothing but the best, but that's where you're going. You know, you said something now, and this is so true. In the beginning, the mentors were absolutely the books and the podcast. And like those things were so important, the YouTube videos. But there comes a point in time where you've got to go to a whole other level. and this is why most people, most, and I boldly say this, why most people will never get there because they don't want to make the investment. And so it's like, I got to go pay this guy 50 grand or 100 grand or 10, whatever level
Starting point is 00:42:41 you start at, I'm like, well, that, it's like having a great tax person. They're going to save you, six, seven figures, and you're going to pay them for it. So I'd rather pay 50 grand to save myself half a million dollars worth of loss. or a million dollars worth of gain. I'll invest that 50 or 100, 150 grand all day long. And most people, they have this, gal it's silliness. They think they can just do it by watching a YouTube video
Starting point is 00:43:13 and they'll be just fun. I'm like, are you kidding? Like, and they're like, but I don't have the money to invest in a coach. I was like, then stay where you are. Like, and I love this example. if child was going to die and you had to come the million bucks could you find the million?
Starting point is 00:43:30 It's crazy. Some people are like, I'm like, wait, you're really hesitated? Yeah. You really couldn't go? A thousand percent. Oh my gosh. Go become an employee.
Starting point is 00:43:41 Go do that. Go work for someone else. Get on. When people say, oh, I don't have the money to invest in someone who's going to hold me accountable, I'm like, awesome. Now you're not in my way. I love that.
Starting point is 00:43:50 Great. Because I don't have to deal with you down the room. I got to deal with the other guy who's willing to burn down villages to make what it happened. the idea of out into a way or make a way. That for me is one of those. We're like, I will make this happen.
Starting point is 00:44:01 And most people, it's sad. I talk to people like weekly. They're like, oh, yeah, I'm reading this book and I'm doing it. I'm like, that's great. It sounds like you're in the beginning stages. Stay in your job. Enjoy your side hustle. Yes.
Starting point is 00:44:16 But if you're trying to go hit seven figures out the park and scale that to multiple seven and eight, you're trying to like really do something. like, I mean, not like a little straw house. You're trying to go build a community, figuratively speaking. You're trying to go make your body chiseled. Like, it's going to, you're not doing it by listening to a YouTube video and reading the guys' cliff notes. There's a cost and a price associated.
Starting point is 00:44:42 And most people, they think they can go build a $10 million business and invest a few hundred dollars here and there. They're so delusional. This is that deep delusional we talked about. Yeah, I mean, if you're sitting there, like, I want to be the most successful person in my entire line that it's ever existed, I'm going to go watch you too. I'm like, you're adorable. Go away. That's adorable.
Starting point is 00:45:04 I'm like, I'll give you a teddy bear. You can hug it. It's just not the reality. It's, you know, the difference between someone who performs on the NFL level versus someone who performs, I make it even easier. I have 92 man on our fastball at 17 years old. I was better than probably 95% of the planet. But the difference between someone in the majors and me was the equivalent of Usain Bolt versus a turtle that had gotten rolled over and was in a coma. I was good.
Starting point is 00:45:33 I wasn't even remotely close to be what it takes. And most of us think that, hey, if I just worked out and did a couple more push-ups, I'm going to have this great body. If I just listened to this video or I go to this event or I go to this seminar, I'm going to radically make 10, you know, I'm going to make 10 million. I'm going to make that nine figures, eight figures, whatever it is. And I'm trying to, and that's what I'm trying to do with this conversation, because you and hire, just being honest, people pay us a lot of money to do what we do because we get the results we get. But most of the people, at least for me, that try to hire me, I'm like, no. So excuse me? And it's the question you just asked, which is if your child needed a million dollars,
Starting point is 00:46:10 if you had to get a million dollars in the next 24 hours or the next year in order to save your child's life, if that person's answer isn't, I will burn down villages. I will light shit on fire to make it happen. If you're not that person, you're not my client. I give more in my book for free for years. I'm curious, when you run into that as well, when you ask people that question, did you have that same kind of reaction to like, oh, go to go away? You're in my way. Yeah. It's just like, hey, look, you're not, you're not my client. I was like, yeah, let me go watch these videos, go read these books, because trying to convince someone like that, it's like we can't hear it. I sometimes even give a simple example. If I gave
Starting point is 00:46:50 the keys, I got four different vehicles. If I gave you the keys to these vehicles, paid for Inclare, could you come up with 10 grand? They're like, of course I could. Why? Well, you're offering me all these cars that, okay, okay, that's the same principle with just about everything else. You got to figure out how to go get 10 or 50 or 100 grand. But they can't make that distinction of, oh, this is the same thing. This guy's, whatever. a 10, 15, $20,000, $50,000 program. But, ah, yeah, they don't see the future possibility of what it's going to be. So, well, those people, I'm like, hey, good luck, man.
Starting point is 00:47:33 I just smile because it's like, they'll never get it. No, those are the people that give them the little advice. Yeah, I give them the little advice. Yeah, those are the people I give the advice. I'm like, hey, go do this. Don't eat this stupid shit. Go work out. Hey, there's these five or six books.
Starting point is 00:47:49 just, you know, please go read it. I think the best example of this was there's a guy named Mark Devine. Mark Devine is a former seal commander. Mark's great. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Hi, Mark.
Starting point is 00:47:58 How are you? I asked him, I said, you know, when someone comes up to you and they say, you know, I want to be a seal, what does it take to survive boot? How weak, he knows in that moment, they'll never going to become a seal. If you're asking, what do I need to survive this, you're not ready to be a seal at all. It's like, hey, once I get through training, what is the things I need to be. to be prepared for it after that. That is a different mindset.
Starting point is 00:48:22 It's a completely different question. And it's kind of like when, because millionaires asked, what do you do? Billionaires ask, how can I help you? How can I be in service you? It's a different narrative.
Starting point is 00:48:32 If you've got the mindset of like, okay, I just need to know how to get past this first level, there's a library card. I wish you'd nothing but the best. Go read as much as you want. YouTube is free. Mazel tough onto you.
Starting point is 00:48:44 But I think there's some preconceived notions and there's some stuff out there that I would love to have us kind of just go through and say, no, what are the things that irk you the most in this space? Are the people like, hey, I'm going to go do this and I'm going to be successful? What are the things that irk you? Well, you've covered a lot of them already. When people are like, they'll see me transform my body,
Starting point is 00:49:07 and they're like, oh, so what are you eating? I was like, what? Are you serious? Like, what do I eat? They'll ask, what do I need to eat? Or what's the workout? I was like, you got it.
Starting point is 00:49:22 And I'm like, I just be patient. I'm like, I just just be patient. I had like, like, go do this, go do this. Because whenever someone's like, man, I just, I can't seem to lose this weight. I was like, let's be real. You stop, police.
Starting point is 00:49:39 You haven't checked your blood work. You don't work out. You go to the gym. You don't push yourself. Let's be real. You're like you're nowhere. You're not even in the ball. You're not even in the parking lot.
Starting point is 00:49:49 You're not even in the city. You're not, you know, another one is when, you know, guys like, oh, I just, I can't figure out, and they'll say, I can't figure out how to close these deal. Like, what? Oh, I'm to, or I want to make a million dollars. Okay, great. Wait, I have to shoot a social media video. I don't even know how to do that.
Starting point is 00:50:10 I was like, can you make a post? It's so hard. I'm like, they just stop. Yeah, just, yeah, you'll be an employee. You can't turn your camera on right here and you can't turn it side. You can't do that. Do your, who are you kidding? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:29 And so anything in that domain where people, they're playing what I call the surface confusion game. There's core action and then there's surface confusion. Core action is necessary, required actions over and over, and it gets boring and it's mundane. And it's, surface confusion is like, I need to go research the right shoes so I can go to what's the best workout outfit? What, what's the best workout? What, like, what, what's my macros? What should my macros be?
Starting point is 00:51:01 I was like, what? I just, you know, I've built like you, there's a lot of patience, but I don't, you can't tolerate a lot. I'm sorry, I don't know what that word is. Hey, sorry with the P? I have no idea what that word is. I don't have chips. Love for people, like just like, okay.
Starting point is 00:51:22 And then, yeah, because there's, there's a different domain. There's like the domain of work and high level, straight line, straight at it. And then there's where you operate and we're sport. And again, it's crazy. There's some of the parents in my football team. They're like, so is my son going to play? Like, he's not happy that he's not playing a lot. I'm like, do you want the truth?
Starting point is 00:51:43 And they're like, well, yeah, he's just not good enough. Did you see that kid over there? That kid right there is 6 foot 4, 240 pounds is a 13-year-old. You see the other kid? He's 6 foot 1, 255 pounds. Your son is like 5-8, a buck 65. He's like, I can coach him and I can help him. So it's that illusion that a lot of people,
Starting point is 00:52:13 Like, I'd rather just have someone tell me, did you suck? Okay. Yeah, a thousand percent. I knew with that. So, yeah, the delusional conversations that people have is, it's painful. Well, it's funny because the conversation that needs to have, it was like, well, that's a really hard conversation. Like, again, I was a pitcher. They were like, I had a coach come with me, like, you've got a great arm, but you can't find the strikes zone.
Starting point is 00:52:35 So you're never going to make it. I was like, oh, that's right. You keep thinking it's next to the guy you kept hitting with the ball. I was like, you're right. And I knew I just can't find the stretch up. That is not a gift that was given to me. me. So having that harsh conversation was like, okay, I'm going to go to something else now. I'm six foot. I can't dunk a basketball. I'm going to buy an NBA team. I'm not going to try
Starting point is 00:52:52 and be on an NBA team. Let's have it come to Jesus here. There are constants and there are variables in the equation of life. And people want to sit there and change constants. That is a waste of time. You influence the variables. You will get a different result. But people don't have these because they're not spending the effort to hire someone like you that sits down and says, okay, how long have you been doing your wife? Okay, what's two? Take off a shirt. let's have this conversation. Okay, show me your pantry. Okay, show me your habits. What are you doing with your phone? Wear a fit bit and tell me what your sleep habits look like. Because let's have a come to Jesus here. Let's really break these things down. I just don't think there's enough people that are honest enough, even in your space, to have these conversations because they want the money. They're not going to come up and have these hard-hitting and hard-hitting conversations. Well, I remember I had a guy coming through my program, and he was probably high 400s, pounds.
Starting point is 00:53:42 So he comes through, like he, I think we drop, get him to drop like 150 pounds over the course of a year. You get him to confront things in his marriage and his business, and then he kind of faded off. So he comes back to renew, and I remember he's in the room, and my team's like, hey, he wants to come back in. And I think the renewal was like, maybe 40 brand or something. I was like, no. And my team's like, well, I said, no. How we don't waste of my time. We don't need his money.
Starting point is 00:54:10 That $40,000, if we take that, it's going to cost us. It's going to cost us energy and time. And that's not the guy we, like, our program can be associated with. Like, he has to be, he begged. I said, then you, I go, if I take your money, which I don't need, like, he's in a group experience. I said, I need you to, like, follow through. Do what you say you're going to do. Stop, stop doing the yo-yo.
Starting point is 00:54:36 stop doing the 5-200 diet, five days, clean, two days, not clean, zero results. Stop doing the yo-yo in your relationships and your business. Unless, I don't need you to come back six months later and ask the same questions that you asked six months ago to only feel good about all the answers you're getting. Because I've been a part of masterminds where people come every three to four months and I'm like, they're saying, like, I'm looking at my notes. You asked this four months ago. You haven't done anything about it. Are you kidding me? And to quote this, like, come to Jesus, real, real talk, straight talk, fierce is required.
Starting point is 00:55:15 And if people aren't willing to do that, then you're like, as for us, we can't take them on. You can't, it caught you more than it does to take them on. And people think that we're doing it because we get joy I'm being harsh or doing it to be the hammer. I'm like, no, I'm trying to eliminate pain. I've been where you are. I know what this. If you saw someone on fire, you're not going to ask them what it feels like or how they feel or how long they've been doing it. I'm going to try and throw a bucket of water on you as fast as I can because you're on fire.
Starting point is 00:55:45 I'm not going to hold your hand and tell you you're pretty. We'll deal with that later. Right now, you're on fire. So it's not that we're doing this because we're like, hey, this is fun and we want to pick on people. No. I know what pain feels like. I don't want that for you. It's a level of being a high end path.
Starting point is 00:56:01 However, I like me, a lot more than I like you. So I'm not going to waste my time or my energy. I'm like, hey, here's the answer. Go do this. Like, I've had a client similar to you, be with a 400 pounds, but he wasn't being his work. And he wanted to re-up.
Starting point is 00:56:17 And I was like, no. He's like, okay, well, here's the option. Here's your plan for the next three months. Send me a picture every day. Send me a result every day. You have to pay me anything. Here's your plan. I won't talk to you for the next 90 days.
Starting point is 00:56:30 If you do all these things For the next 90 days I will be open to having a conversation with you For 20 days He did everything I asked them to do Didn't do it for 90 That's cool Thank you for saving us both a lot of time
Starting point is 00:56:42 It's not complicated So when someone comes to you And wants to have these How long does it take you To have this come to Jesus with them? You know If it's early on in the conversation To come to Jesus happens real fast
Starting point is 00:56:55 And then I tell them what it takes to work with me And they're like Oh Okay I'm like I'm like, you should just go buy my book. And I had that the other day. I was like, hey, just, he's like, I want to do what you do. And whenever people say, I want to do what you do, I'm like, that's like someone
Starting point is 00:57:10 looking at a college football coach, I want to coach college football on Saturdays. It's good to want things. Their wives are single moms because they are recruiting. They work. They leave at 5.30 in the morning. They get home in the night for half the year. The other half they're recruiting. So, you know, it's early on where I can just say, look, here's.
Starting point is 00:57:30 what it's going to really take. And I need you to go home. I need you to go home and think about it. They're like, why? Because they're like, no, I'm in. I'm in. I'm in. I'm like, you want to do what I do? You better be ready to go through hell, fire, damnation, sleet, snow, tempest, world, like, you're going to get rejected. You're going to get kicked in the teeth. You're not going to make any money. You're going to question yourself. You're going to question, like, your life in the whole time. And if you're not ready to do that, you don't want to do what I do. It looks like you want to do what I do. So again, some people that come to Jesus is early. And for some people, they're, they're really good at pretending. And so as a coach, I've got to check
Starting point is 00:58:10 and be willing to cut them off and say, look, we can, even like mid, midway through a relationship, they pay significant amount of money. I'm like, I can't, I'm going to break the agreement. We're done. Like, why? I'm like, because you're wasting your time and my time and your money and money. Like you're, like, this is, we're not doing anything. I'm not a therapist. I'm not a psychologist. I'm not a doctor. If you want, if you need those things, there's great people out there that will listen to you for hours. I am a coach who you declare what you want. We get committed. You write me a check and then we go create that thing together. And I be who I need to be for you and you become who you need to be to go raise the $250 million or to go do the Iron Man plus get your children back
Starting point is 00:58:57 and or to build this thing over here and become the speaker, the influencer. Like, it's, it's not complicated. Do what's required, and you will get the results that are desired. Doing your best is for kids, doing what you know is for amateurs. I even had someone the other day that said, you know, we gave it all we had.
Starting point is 00:59:17 So go easy. And I'm like, that's why you failed. That's why you fell. And I just, you know, I had to block these guys. I'm like, they're trying to shout, man. I'm like, I coach people for a living. Like, if you don't do what's required, you will never get what you desire. And your answer right there, we gave it all we had.
Starting point is 00:59:37 Like, go back to the job. And that's okay. And that's okay. That's your lane. Stay in your lane. So if someone wants to work with you, what do they have to do to require, what's required before they even pick up the phone or reach out and say, hey, what would you like them to do in advance?
Starting point is 00:59:51 Because I've got a laundry list for me. Yeah. So for me, I tell people, I'll tell people, look. go listen to like a dozen of my podcast. Go get a feel for my energy and how I talk. Go buy my book. It's called Game Changer, right? It's Septembermongali.com for it slash games.
Starting point is 01:00:07 I'm running the free plus shipping right now. Go pay 12 bucks to ship. We'll ship you the buck. There's an audio book. Like, read that. And then go look at yourself in the mirror and have a real, real conversations. Because if you're going to come to me and we're going to have a conversation, it's going to be really simple.
Starting point is 01:00:25 I'll just say, look, this is what it takes to work with me, and you write me that check, and then, you know, it's a significant investment, but it's a real commitment. That commitment means, hey, you're going to change everything in your world. You're going to go upside down, inside out. And so I just tell people, like, and most people won't even, they won't go listen to the podcast. They won't buy and read the book. That makes it really, really easy for me.
Starting point is 01:00:50 But if someone's like, oh, I read your book, I went through the podcast, I bought your three different courses, I'm like, let's have a conversation. So those simple hurdles just weed most people out because it's like the, I really want to do what you do. Can we talk? No. Go on these things first. Yeah. So if people want to track you down and find those books and find those courses and find the podcast, where are these things? How do they find you? So like my site, www. S-E-M-A-G-A-L-I-com, that's just, that's my first and last name. If you throw a forward slash game changer, it's going to take you to the book. My podcast is called Game Changer with Sittemangali. So there's 600 episodes you can choose from. There's all kinds from 10 years ago to five years ago to three years ago. And my podcast are
Starting point is 01:01:42 short. They're punchy. So it just gives you a feel. And again, everything is on the hub of my site, my socials. But let's tell people like, you got one shot at life on the planet. So if you're not actively and intentionally building the life you want, then you are unintentionally building a life that you don't want. And that's on you. So my slides to temelai.com, you'll see my socials. You see the book. It's all there.
Starting point is 01:02:13 And it's what we've talked about here. It's not easy. But again, living a life of regret is not easy. I talk to people all the time about, they're like, well, organic is so expensive. I'm like, it's cheaper than chemo. It's going through your entire life and wasting your time and sitting around and go, oh, maybe I'll do it one day.
Starting point is 01:02:33 It's far more expensive than reaching out to someone like you. Man, I can't appreciate it or thank you enough for coming on. I mean, I really appreciate your spending the time. It's great to be here. Thank you for the great conversation. It was awesome. We don't have these conversations too often with other podcast hosts or people because it's usually pretty fluffy.
Starting point is 01:02:51 So I appreciate you, man, so much. Yeah, these are the private. conversations that don't normally happen. So thank you for having the courage to do it out in public and have that real. Because most people just want to make money versus like, let's have a real come to Jesus. So thank you for having the audience. Have it come to Jesus, man. I appreciate it. Appreciate it. All right. That wraps up our episode. This was one of those that I was actually a little worried about publishing. But we both sat down and he and I were like, you know what? Let's get it to him. No one out there is being honest. No one's talking about what's proven for real success.
Starting point is 01:03:19 Everyone's holding your hand and trying to give it fluff. That's not what he does. That's not what made them successful. And that's not what it makes anybody successful. I hope you guys liked this one. I hope we give you insights. I hope you stuck through even though it was uncomfortable. But it's the only way to be successful. All right.
Starting point is 01:03:33 I'll see you in the next one.

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