Jessica Kaylee - If Halloween Candy gave you Powers

Episode Date: October 6, 2025

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Where did you get that? Aunt Sabrina sent me a bag full of finger gummies and eyeballs. Do not eat that, Jessica. Those are not gummies. Sure, she sent me real severed fingers. She might have your aunt's a witch. Just because you two don't get along, doesn't mean she'd try and big me real body parts.
Starting point is 00:00:15 I wouldn't put anything past her. Now give me the bag. Sorry, Mom, but you need a better hiding spot. What does that mean? Ew, Sebastian, why are you letting her pick your nose? Who? Her. Jess, there's no one picking my nose.
Starting point is 00:00:31 Wait, you don't see that girl right there? Do you? He can't see dead people, Pumpkin. Just you can't. Hello! Do you see something? Uh, no. Carry on.
Starting point is 00:00:41 Stop it. So you died in the 20s? Jess. Who are you talking to? Margaret. My great, great grandma's best friend. Please tell me you're joking. No.
Starting point is 00:00:54 Since when? Since today? Well, my aunt gave me these body part gummies that give me special abilities. Do you want one? No way. It was like a little too real to be gummies. Well, you're like, you're like.
Starting point is 00:01:04 because that ghost leprechaun dancing on your head has sick dance moves. Get off my head! Get off! You can't touch them, Billy Jean. They're translucent. Haven't you ever seen Caspar the Ghost? Aw, all the ghosts disappeared. Oh well, time to try another. I really hope you're not a real finger. Principal Franklin, why do you smell like sweat, cheap coffee, and baby diapers?
Starting point is 00:01:32 My wife just had a baby, so that's all I've been around for the past 48 hours. Well, I know. money's probably tight with the new baby but invest in some cologne my guy P you Kloss there will be no homework tonight after all yes miss Peppa's the best she's actually only doing that because she's too hung over to grade papers and she just wants to get home to her leftover pineapple pizza before crying herself to sleep again let me guess you can read people's minds no I could smell people's odors you'd be surprised how much B.O. will give away does that mean you could
Starting point is 00:02:03 smell my odor yeah and let me tell you not the date of forget to brush your teeth. Jess, I just thought of a genius idea. You know how the school's been speculating that Coach Frank and Miss Pepper are having a secret relationship? Well, now you can figure it out for everyone. So? Does he smell like her? He doesn't smell like Miss Peppa, but I know that perfume. He smells like my mom. No! That must be who she sneaks out to see some nights. Maybe not. Maybe it's someone who wears her exact perfume. He doesn't just smell like her perfume though Billy Jean. He smells like her toe jam. Ew, T.
Starting point is 00:02:42 TMI. You're telling me. I had to smell it. My nose is back to normal. Let's see what a green finger does. What does that mean? Becky, do you need a hand? Not from you. Come on, your hands are clearly full. Just hand me something. Fine here. Ah! Did you just tase me? No. I mean not on purpose. How do you electrocute someone on accident? And you wonder why we're not friends. Becky, wait, I'm sorry. Jess, do you know why Becky's crying? Yeah, it's because I tased her.
Starting point is 00:03:21 You what? On accident. My hands have electricity today. It's my special ability. Are you sure you don't want to try one of those fingers? It's really fun. Hmm. Seeing dead people and tasing people with your touch.
Starting point is 00:03:33 Yeah, I'm good. Someone help. My dog was running and his heart stopped. I can help, but back up. I don't want you to get hurt. What are you gonna do? Restart his heart. Okay, thank you. I owe you one.
Starting point is 00:03:48 It was my pleasure. Good boy, Max. Ow! Why did he zap me? Looks like someone got into my candy. He might do that for a few days. Days? What kind of candy was that?
Starting point is 00:04:01 I could touch metal without being electrocuted. It finally wore off. I wonder what the zombie does. I feel weird. It's payback time. Did you just pepper spray me? Yeah. Why aren't your eyes burning?
Starting point is 00:04:17 Even mine are burning from being downwind. I don't know. I guess I'm immune. Well then take this. Becky. Get the taser off my arm. Is this thing not working? Nope. Test it out on yourself. Screw you, Jess, you painless freak.
Starting point is 00:04:35 I could have picked a better time to eat that zombie. Jess! Oops! Sorry, I stepped on your toe. Don't worry about it. I can't feel pain right now. Really? Can I test it out? Go for it. Hit me as hard as you can. Ow!
Starting point is 00:04:49 Oh my gosh, I am so sorry! I punched you as hard as I could! I'm just kidding! I didn't feel a thing! Ugh! You got me! Jessica! Why is Becky driving a bulldozer screaming your name?
Starting point is 00:05:01 I'm guessing she wants to figure out if I can feel that. Are you gonna let her? Absolutely not! I might not be able to feel pain, but I could get squashed! Run! Run! I need to keep that zombie gummy close by in case Becky finds me. But in the meantime, let's see what's see what's...
Starting point is 00:05:18 See what ghosty does. Has anyone seen Jess? She found me already. Jess, come out, come out wherever you are. Wait, can she not see me? Who's talking? Hello? Who's there?
Starting point is 00:05:31 Your great, great aunt sister, telling you to leave Jess alone and be the bigger person. Being the bigger person's overrated. Then I shall haunt you forever. On second dot, no it's not, I'll leave her alone. It's never too early to plan your summer story in Europe. with WestJet from rolling countryside to cobblestone streets begin your next chapter book your seat at westjet.com or call your travel agent westjet where your story takes off
Starting point is 00:06:00 girl ew what is that philly jean it's me i'm a ghost right now so i need you to cover for me in miss pepice class fine but what do i say say i had like a family emergency or something Billy Jane, do you know where Jess is? Uh, yeah, she had like an ulcer in her mouth and it started spreading horribly. And she had to leave really quickly without telling anyone. Ow! Well, hopefully she gets her herpes cure. I don't have herpes!
Starting point is 00:06:26 Who said that? You couldn't have thought of a better lie? Hey now, you didn't get written up, did you? No. See, you should be thanking me. Whoa, I could see you again. That means my ability wore off. I have one more finger to try.
Starting point is 00:06:41 Does this one do? I don't... Whoa! Are you limiting? I'm not touching the ground! This is so cool! Hold on, don't get too high. You could hurt yourself.
Starting point is 00:06:54 Only if I fall back down. Billy Jean, the bell rang. Off to class. Wee. I need to start getting more sleep. I'm hallucinating flying students. Jessica, it is your turn to tell us your special talent. My special skill is I can fly.
Starting point is 00:07:11 Very funny. Now come on, hurry up. I can. Can. See? Holy Harry Potter. Okay, okay. Where's the optical illusion?
Starting point is 00:07:22 There's no optical illusion. It's magic. Good try, but I believe in science, not wizardry. Here, grab my hands. I'll prove it. See? Look how small everyone is. Oh, set me down.
Starting point is 00:07:34 Set me down! Fine. Ow! Oops! I quit! Jessica! Where is the candy? I know you took it back.
Starting point is 00:07:43 You took it back. Oh, she's gonna take it away for good this time. Jessica Kaylee, give me the candy. Sorry, Mom, there's nothing you can do. I ate it all. Jessica! Since today, when my aunt gave me these body part gummies... Doesn't just smell like her toe jam though, Billy Jean.
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