Jessica Kaylee - If you Could Read a Private Group Chat

Episode Date: July 19, 2025

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Welcome to aboard of Viarai. Embarked and profite. Embarked and relax. Cirotay. Bookine. Oh, that also. And profite. Via Rae. The voice that we love. Summer is so boring. Speak for yourself. I slept until 3 p.m. today. There's no time to be bored. Billy Jean. Are you seeing what I'm seeing? Yeah. What the heck is this?

No idea. But Summer just got a whole lot of... more interesting. I'll call you back. See the last Snapchat or see the last group chat message? What if it's a group chat with Olivia, Sabrina, and Taylor Swift? No, there's no way they would let me see that. But in the off chance, I'm picking it. Group chat loading. Please be something juicy. Please be something juicy. Wolfpack group chat? Why does that sound familiar? Because that's a group chat with every single popular boy in my grade. Oh, this is a total invasion of their privacy. And I'm here for it. My first group chat message. Timothy, why aren't you on call of duty yet? Because my mom's been making me do chores all day. You've seriously been doing that for 20 minutes, no cat.

Guys, I don't think I drink water today. Then drink water. I... Seriously, this is what boys talk about. Have you guys ever had sardines on pizza dipped in ketchup? No, but sounds gas. Sounds like it would give me gas. Gross! This is the boringest group chat ever! Ugh! I have to text Billy Jean.

This group chat is so boring. I think it might be giving me more brain rot than those brain rot TikTok videos. Well, my ability was to see ghosts, and it's been horrifying. So I'm staying under the blanket all day. Keep me updated? Parker texted? So who's everyone crushing on? Yes, Parker, yes!

Give me the tea. Specifically, who are you crushing on Parker? Is it me? Because I really hope it's me. Anna, I think she is so cute. Bet. Okay, Jeremy, if you don't have anything to add, don't text. I think Paige is pretty cute.

Okay, no one cares, Ryan. Someone asks Parker. Who does Parker like? Nice. Jeremy? I say about texting nonsense? Jeremy, what about you? Okay, now we're getting somewhere. I think Billy Jean is pretty cute. Jeremy likes Billy Jean? Oh, that is some tea. Now someone asked Parker, please, anyone. Parker, what about you? Yes, Jeremy, yes. You are finally redeeming

yourself. Nice. Nice what? No, no, no, no. Who did Parker say you liked? What did Parker say? on tacos? No, Jeremy, no! Who did Parker say he liked? Come on group chat. Rewind. Reverse. Go backwards. No, but that sounds fire. And it's over. Ugh. So much for being in the group chat. The group chat moved on just as Parker texted who he liked. So now I'll never know. Maybe try texting Parker and see if it sparks anything in the chat. If he said you, maybe it will. Genius. Did it work? Anyone want to play Fortnite?

No. It didn't. It didn't work. If anything, it proved he doesn't like me because he texted the group chat and didn't respond to my text. We could be forever alone together. Mood.

Incoming call from Parker. Wait, what? Hello? So you're able to read our group chat, huh? What? No, no. Why would you think that? Did Billy Jean tell you that?

She lied. I know because I've been able to read. to read your chat with Billy Jean. I never thought it would be my privacy being invaded today. Look, about the group chat. Nothing Billy Jean and I said was true. So you don't like me. No, no.

Unless you want me to. You see, what you missed in our group chat is I said I like you. Really? I mean, oh, really? Yeah. Would you maybe want to do a picnic this week? Yeah, how about tomorrow? Perfect.

I'll text you. Okay. Summer just got a whole lot less boring. So did your butt rash ever clear up? Billie Jean, no, no, why would you text that? Lazzang sur-gillet, puissance-moyance-moyerned for 15 minutes. We're like it's their dojo.

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