KGCI: Real Estate on Air - Employing Faith Over Fear to Succeed in Real Estate

Episode Date: November 7, 2025

Morning Primer is your weekday boost from Mindset & Motivation Monday—quick, focused, and made for agents by KGCI Real Estate On Air. Give yourself a daily mindset reset for the daily direction you need to show up sharp and ready to win.Start your morning ahead of the market and ahead of your competition every day with KGCI Real Estate On Air. Summary: In the high-stakes world of real estate, the most successful agents don't eliminate fear—they choose faith. This powerful episode explores how to harness a faith-over-fear mindset to overcome paralyzing anxieties like the fear of rejection, market uncertainty, and financial insecurity. Learn the practical, daily steps to cultivate unwavering confidence, build true resilience, and make bold decisions that transform your business from transactional to purposeful.  Ready for more? Subscribe now and tap into our Always Free Real Estate On Air Mobile App for iPhone and Android, where you’ll find our complete archive and 24/7 stream of proven real estate business-building strategies and tactics.

This is your Monday momentum. Extended all week. Morning Primer from the Mindset and Motivation Monday on KGCI, Real Estate on Air. Welcome back to Realty Funnels. So glad to have you with us. I'm so excited today to be talking with Tanya Upton. Tanya, welcome. Thank you.

Thanks so much. You're with the Swamp Rabbit Property Team. You know I need to ask you about that. I know. It's funny. So I'm in Greenville, South Carolina, and we have a lot of out-of-state people that move here. And so it's always a funny little moment when I say, oh, I'm a swamp repit property team. You know, we're not selling you swam land.

So we're in Greenville. And the Swambramette Trail is a huge attraction to this area. It's a trail, and it's like 40 miles long at this point, I think, and they keep adding on to it. and it's a cycling running trail, and it connects all the towns, like downtown Greenville, to Simpsonville, Travelers, so it just heads to the mountains,

and it heads towards the coast, throughout, it connects all the parks and restaurants, and it's amazing. So we're a big cycling community, and I believe our community is just more of, like, living outside kind of community. So I think it's really healthy for people retiring

or just families, just keeping everybody connected happy and outside. I love it. And that's the same came from. So Swamp Rabbit is actually the, it sounds like a former perhaps railroad trail that has been converted. I don't know if it was that, maybe parts of it, but it goes right through downtown Greenville. And they have just added to it. So it's kind of been its own thing.

They have added to it throughout all the counties. cities here. And you're a real estate agent then focusing on the Greenville, South Carolina market area. How long have you been an agent? I have been with EXP Realty for seven years, six years. I can't remember. Six or seven. And what were you doing before your life as a real estate agent?

So I was in corporate logistics for a long time. so a business development manager for air freight company and that was quite different but I got a lot of negotiation skills from my my career in international logistics and I'm a company too so and you've been a real estate agent full time then for six years or so yeah and and tell us a little bit about your ideal clients, who it is you love working with, whether it's a seller or a buyer? I am one of those that love everybody, seller, buyer. I feel like everybody that comes into my life as a client that they were supposed to be there. They were connected and everything just works out the way it's supposed to. So I love listing houses. I love selling houses. I love helping my

fires. I feel the same way. I feel like being a real estate agent is perhaps, and I hope this doesn't sound too silly or woo-woo, but I'm not a preacher, and yet this is a chance for me to be a minister in a certain way that I get to help guide people through what is typically a very stressful, complicated, emotional chapter of their lives. That's right. It's a real blessing to me to be able to help them at that key moment and do a great job for them, earn their trust, earn their appreciation. And of course, from that, I'm going to get more and more additional business in the future. But for me, it's such an opportunity for me to be somebody who is a real help to them in that critical moment. That's right. You're able to protect them and their best interest.

So it doesn't matter if they're buying or selling. And it doesn't matter to me what price point they're at. I mean, I don't care if it's an $80,000 condo or a $6 million home. To me, these are people. This is a place that they value. It's a property that they own or their home that they own. And it's a place where they have a lot of memories attached, a lot of emotion is involved. So I never take that lightly.

and every single person I get an opportunity to work with is somebody that I feel God is entrusted to me. I feel the same. Absolutely. It's God has me here. And I think with all of my experience, it's the perfect way for God to use me to help people. Wonderful. Wonderful. I just going to that, I just had a deal that my clients were selling their house.

and it, they, the buyers would ask for an extension. And Friday, the extension, we gave them one extension for one week and the extension expired. And they asked for another extension. And my sellers were, okay, yes. And I just want to advise them a little more because I think it's really easy if you don't have that grounding with God and you don't see it that way to get into fear. and I think that was out of fear.

Extendant, oh my gosh, I don't want to let that go. And I think when you're really doing your job, you're able to advise them and take that fear out of the equation and be logical and take the whole thing. And so it gives us a lot of strength, you know, having God is that cornerstone to our business to be advising our clients. And that's why I know I'm right where I'm supposed to be when I'm working with a client because I was able to advise them, even though they were. were nervous about it, did not do the extension, and then got an even higher offer.

Wow. And went under contract. It was higher. The contingencies were better. The inspection, basically no inspection period. The whole thing worked out. It was great for my clients. And it'll be great for the buyers too because the house is in great condition.

I love it. You know, I feel the same way that if you come from a place of abundance rather than a place of scarcity, then you're availing yourself to the better opportunities. And my firm belief is that God is in complete control and whatever is meant to be will be. We don't need to fret and worry. No, it's faith over fear. And I found in this business, when they say 90% of agents fail,

and I tell the agents I'm mentoring, I'm like, no, they don't. 90% of agents don't fail. They give up. They quit. They live in fear over faith. And it's really, that's what it is. I agree with you 100%. Now, it sounds like you've been doing some mentoring.

It sounds like you've been coaching some people along the way because I have two and I can hear that voice already. Tell me, are you doing some mentoring and some coaching? I am doing mentoring and coaching. I'm doing real estate mentoring. I mentor new agents. I don't do as much as I did. I did have, I wanted to actually be mentoring.

you know, a lot of agents at one time, I worked for like 10 to 15, but I found that, you know, life, I kind of always have some things along the way that are not prepared for that happened. And I had some real challenges the past two years. And so now I like to only mentor one or two agents at a time for real estate because it's just, I kind of moved in a different direction to starting the real estate team. but I'm really getting into coaching, more personal coaching, personal development on that sector. So that's where I'm headed. Interesting.

I would think, because I've been mentoring agents and coaching real estate agents since 2004, it can take a lot of energy. It can take a lot. And what's interesting about it is I can't have them have the success I want for them. They have to have that success for themselves. That's right. And I have found, and I don't know if you found this with mentoring. I have found that they have to want it more than I want it for them. And I've found that a lot of agents, and the reason I only want one or two mentees at a time now, is that I have had some interesting situations where people aren't doing what they need to do or they're failing and they want to blame you or not take accountability. for themselves. And so it's interesting, you know, because most people stop at the start.

They won't do what they need to do. And I just, it's too much when you have that many. And you sound like you're similar to me in that if you take on a responsibility to coach or guide someone, I'm all in. And then I'm encountering somebody who perhaps isn't as all in as. I am and then all of a sudden I'm like well I can't want this more than you you have to want this for yourself yeah and I don't want to get up and call them every day I'm like I'm not here to call you what are you doing today I put ideas give them things to do and then I'll ask them

I used to do weekly meetings at in our office here and I'm like who followed up on these leads who did we do a thing called crazy AIDS and tell me what that is what are crazy AIDS The crazy eights is one of the ways I started, so I just implement. I'm like, I don't could you call it crazy threes or whatever, but crazy AIDS to me was I pick eight activities and I do it eight times a day. My goal is to do all of them. You know, if it's hand out your business card eight times a day. Eight business cards eight times a day. So touch eight people give them out.

You know, do eight emails. Do eight posts across social media. So you hit those eight things every single day. and I just found that it doesn't happen every day because hopefully you get a call and you're doing other things or you get a lead or you're working with somebody. But if you aren't, you shouldn't reach those every day, especially if you're a full-time agent. And so I guess the next week and then people, they're not doing that. And I'm like, okay, but whenever they're not successful, they want to start blaming somebody. It's like, I can't make you.

And I think it just comes from fear not doing it. They're too afraid to do it, which is real. I mean, listen, I was in sale. and international logistics. I've done the walk of shame. I walked and knocked on doors of manufacturers where they have the big glass windows all the way to the front door

where you walk in everybody's office is right there and you got to walk all the way back when you were rejected or nobody talked to you. And I called it the walk of shame. I'm like, oh, my gosh, you know. You got to go in and ask for the manufacturer's name. I sat in my car parade, not wanting to do it, not wanting to take that next step

and get out of my car. But I did, you know. We had in our coaching program, one of the coaching programs that we have through Realty Funnels, one of our agents was talking about how nervous he was to go and follow up with people who had inquired on one of his lead magnets. So these are people who had engaged with him. He had attracted them into his world. And now he had their contact information, their name, their address, their email

address, and their phone number. and he was nervous about going and knocking on their door to just drop off a brochure about himself. We said, just go out there and do it and let's report back next week on how many you were able to do. Well, he had 10 leads. He went and knocked on 10 doors. Eight people answered. Two weren't home. Nobody swept him off of their front porch with a broom or a gun.

Nothing went wrong. He was able to do it. And he said it was all in my head. It's scary. It's so real. And sometimes you will just need someone to hold their hand and do it, you know, but sometimes you really just need to do it, you know. And I remember I was in phone sales one time.

And I remember like the first time I had to make a live call. And my boss, they had at the time, I don't know if companies used this or not, at the time they had Skype where they could listen to my phone conversation through the IOP system. And I was so nervous that I was this and I was working from home at the time to the company. This is before COVID before they even did work from home. Anybody knew about work from home. But I remember being so nervous to make that phone call and have this interview with our clients. Like you would interview.

And I literally was like on the floor. with the mute button going, oh my gosh. And I'd be like, you know, and fall into script because it was so nerve-wracking for me. And this is after I had done sales for so long in logistics. I had gone through kind of a winter of my life during a season. And then I took at-home sales job doing that. Even with all that experience, it was awful. So it's a real thing, the fear of doing all of this.

And I think what I learned through the process, of all of these sales jobs and then what I've learned in the process of growing a real estate business, it just hit me one day. I can't fail. Like you can't fail. What are we so afraid of? Like, no matter what, like even this podcast, giving a speech, you know, I've been asked to do speaker events.

And I get nervous and I'm like, what am I nervous about? I can't fail. Like I'm, there's nothing. There's no failing. And finally somehow at some point, recently that just like completely clicked in my mind good for you i i long have felt that there is no win or lose it's only win or learn so there's no failure you're not going to fail you're just going to learn and you have a better chance of winning if you actually take that action

and then there's like this do or don't do and really you're just where you are and so you can get yourself the next level and you can't get to the next level if you don't get uncomfortable. Right. Oh, that's so true. Are you comfortable here or do I want to be uncomfortable to get there? Right. I'm ready for next level stuff. I'm like, all right, take me to the next level. I'm going to go stand in front of this crowd and speak.

Even if I'm crying, which I did. My last speaker event, I stood right up there and boo-hoo to front everybody. But I'm like, hey, you know what? I'm going to the next level now. I'm going to level up because I said yes. And I did it. Good for you. Good for you.

You know, that is so authentic, too, if you're actually sharing at a level where your emotions are on display, that's next level stuff right there. And everything that you want in life is just outside your comfort zone. That's right. It's so true. To the ages I've been to where I'm like, you cannot fail. You won't fail. You can't fail. You're the only reason that you're not.

doing or having what you want you. That's it. Many, many years, I would coach real estate agents when I was running real estate brokerages. They'd come in, sit at my office and they're like, Kevin, what should I do? And I would go over a strategy of action steps that they could take so that they would have some quick wins. And they were pretty basic. And you probably have heard of some variation of this, although your crazy Aates is right in line with this. My whole philosophy was that you need to go out and meet five new people every day. People you don't yet know, you just got to meet them, get their contact information, understand who they are. You need to reach out to 10 people that you already do know and reengage with them, check in on them,

see how they're doing, just build the relationships, and then follow up with 15 note cards, or, I mean, back in 2004 when I would start this type of coaching, note cards, actual note cards that you would mail that was not a foreign notion. Now it would be a novel thing to receive something in the mail from somebody. It really is. It's nice to send a card and that's on my list every day by net. It's one thing that I have a hard time. I'm like, I have five stacks of like thank you cards I need to handwrite and send out. I just need to slow down. It's so true. And you actually don't need to overthink it. You just need to say, hey, thinking of you, hope you're doing great. Right. And they would be delighted to get that note card from you. So five,

5, 10, 15, and then the last part of it was five. Go out and preview five homes every day. You need to know your local market area. And I would have people come in a week later, and I'm like, so how did everything go with the 5, 10, 15, 5? I need to do that. Okay, so here you are sitting with me again, and I'm going to share with you that you should go out and meet five people,

connect with 10 people you already know, write 15 personal messages to those same five and 10 people and preview five homes. go out and do that and then let's reconnect next week. Our meeting this week is a lot shorter because that's the same message. That's why I am not just taking, like when the company sends me mentor requests, I won't take them anymore. I do an interview and I tell them I am a high D personality. I'm very direct.

I'm an action person and I'm not going to sit there. I'm going to talk to you. I'm going to say this is like let's get through this. Let's work through this. contract or offer. I'm going to tell you the things that you need to do. And I've found that people get their feelings her easily or they don't like that. I'm like, you didn't do that. Why are you wasting my time? My time is bad. Well, because I get a mentor fee of zero percent of zero is nothing. Right. It's super valuable. So I've gotten where I only take a couple and I tell them up front.

If you're not going to want somebody to direct, you don't want to hire me. I don't want to be your mentor, you don't want me. If you're not going to follow through, this is a waste of both of our time. And so I've got where I'm very upfront about the type of mentoring. And I mean, I'm not the right fit for everybody. What I found was so interesting was that when an agent would actually commit to doing the 510, 15, 5. And we're going to have a meeting the following week. They'd call me up. They're like, Kev, I'm sorry, I've got to cancel. I met with a couple buyers. Yeah. They met people. They're doing things.

They're too busy to do it. That's what you want. It's like, fly. Exactly. I'm like, that's fascinating. So you did what I told you and now you're busy with real estate and now you don't need to meet with me. Fly.

Go fly, bird, fly. Right. Now, it sounds like you're also focusing on doing some additional coaching outside of the real estate space. Tell me a little bit more about that. So my heart is with women and helping women. to overcome any kind of abuse through coaching, business coaching, life coaching, abuse, abuse, recovery, any hardship in life that is holding them back, you know, or whatever story

was written for them or that they co-signed, I like to think that maybe I can be a light through that and show a path. So that's my passion is. So I focused on that, not just real estate coaching. And that's why I think, too, I'm like, this is what I, a part of God's calling for me. And so the mentoring with real estate is too, but that's where I'm like very specific. If you're serious and you want to be an active real estate agent that I will mentor you because I need to take my extra time and energy and post, you know, put it towards my

coaching for women. And you're writing a book. And so you're going to really go full force into this effort, which I think, is so powerful. You know, as a man, I wouldn't be your ideal client for this. But I think it's really important that women connect with other women in this type of space so that they can have a comfort level and confide and feel comfortable growing into the person that they're really destined to become.

I think it's really important because we see so many, I see a lot of these panels or men at the top or you'll see a panel. I'll see these speakers and they're coming to town. There's Tony Robbins or David Goggin. There's all these men and that's great and I learn a lot from them. But it's rare that I see a woman on those panels. Maybe one and then you just go and they just throw her on there. And we need women to look up to that have overcome things that are strong business leaders or survivors. And so, you know, to have to have that. voice and the thing is is it's really hard to have that voice when you've been through things. It's just like me saying yes to public speaking, which I don't like, but part of the reason I got

up there was not just for me. It's like if I can get up there, then that shows other people that they can cross over and do that too. And it's taken a lot. I mean, I'm a strong person. I'm a high idea, strong personality. Why was it so hard for me to do that? And it's not easy. So I feel like that's part of the calling. It's taking this stuff. One of my long-term life, long philosophies is that everybody is going through something we don't quite know. So why don't we all just be gentle with each other. Right. Have a little bit more empathy and understanding. Certainly I've gone through stuff. My wife has gone through stuff. So if that's true for us, then it's probably true for whoever's on the other side of this negotiation I'm dealing with or this home seller

or home buyer or whatever it is. So I think that's really important. And then in the space of business and success, women have this interesting challenge, which is that they want to have success in the home and outside of the home, men don't necessarily grow up with that same type of notion of, you know, hey, you want to have success inside the home. It's more like you want to have success on the sporting field and now you want to have success in the business world. So I think a lot of times when you see some of these wonderful and they're very wonderful motivational events, the women's voice is missing. So I think it's really important what you're doing. Thank you. Yes, I want to muster as much courage as I can to keep getting up there and telling my story.

Because it's funny, you think you're the only person, but when you stand up and tell your story, you find out so many people that relate to you and are super appreciative that somebody relates to them. I think it's so important. You know, in real estate, real estate is such a wonderful business for those of us who are entrepreneurs. those of us who are self-starters, and we will look in the mirror and see that that's where the responsibility starts and stops. You know, that's who's in charge. Right.

And it's an awesome business because there is no ceiling on it. I remember growing up in a nice little town outside of Akron, Ohio, where there were a couple of women real estate brokers who were legendary in the Akron, Ohio area. And now growing, being grown up and looking back on it, it's like, well, that's because women weren't stopped from being successful in real estate in the 60s and 70s. Right. They could actually go out there, make a name for themselves, have amazing success. No one was going to stop them because they were in charge. Right.

And so here we are, you know, all these years later where my wife has a wonderful voice and she's a CPA in addition to being a real estate broker. and so she is used to negotiating with the IRS, and she doesn't understand why home buyers and home sellers don't understand negotiating. And so she's a very strong, successful woman, and I just admire that there are women out there who are saying, okay, now I want to give back. I want to reach down, bring the next generation up. It's important what you're doing.

It's really important, too. You know, one thing really hit me. I was in an attorney's office one day, and the attorney had little bobbleheads of every president. And I was just thinking, oh, those are cool. But his bookshelf was like a almost like a half circle, right? And so all the presidents were lined up on the lines because the books were all on the side. And the presidents went all the way through. And I just remember being like, this is really cool.

And looking at, and by the time I got to the last row, I just was like, wow, there's not one woman on there. Not yet. You know? And I thought of all these years, you're telling me there's not one woman that's strong enough and capable enough and intelligent enough to be the president of the United States of America. And then I just looked at it on a smaller level.

And I looked around and I was like, and then I've taken it all the way to just panels like these speakers. And I'm like, there are some women out there that are getting traction, but it's not it's not the same and we can all be great together and do great not just women i mean men need to have men to look up to too too um you know but women need the same i now this is going to sound silly and i don't mean to sound it make it sound in any way trite because this is totally genuine when i was young in my teens i thought martha stewart was unbelievably cool and awesome

She is. She's so cool. And now she's on the swimsuit edition of Sports Illustrated in her 80s. I just think she's amazing. And there are many women that I know. All right. So I think you're like best friends. I think that we are seeing an enlightenment of everything happening in business and in society. I think it's a great place that we're entering into right now. I know that people will want. to connect with you. So let's talk about how they can connect with you. If they wanted to reach out to you, tell us your phone number. My phone number is 864-4-117-1837. And how about your website? Where would they be able to go and find some information about the market in Greenville, South Carolina? So at the Swampharmat Property Team.com. Okay, very easy. Now, do you like social media? Are you on Instagram or Twitter? What do you do? Instagram, yes, and you can find me at Upstate Upton.

Perfect, perfect. Well, this has been a fantastic conversation. Now, let me ask you this. Anything that you wish that you knew when you started in real estate that you now know that you wish somebody had shared with you back then? That I won't fail. Yeah, yeah. No matter what, you won't fail. If whatever you do, just keep doing it, you will not fail.

This has been a fantastic conversation, Tanya. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you for having me. I appreciate you. It's my pleasure.