KGCI: Real Estate on Air - Minority Mental Health.

Episode Date: May 21, 2024

Hey everybody, it's Cody Gilkisson. Welcome to another episode of CultureCast, the biweekly podcast about what makes us us. We're really excited because we are bringing you guests from the all-new DEI team. So today we're welcoming Morgan Johnson, our brand new media communications coordinator. Morgan, welcome. Thank you, Cody. I appreciate you allowing me to be on this platform. So I recognize Minority Mental Health Month. Can you share with us the unique? challenges based by minority communities when it comes to mental health and accessing mental health services? Yeah, I find accessing mental health services. I'll start with that. It's kind of difficult in minority communities. I live in Arizona and I live in sort of a rough part of town. So in order for me to go see my therapist, I have to drive like an hour away. So if I had a therapist

that was a lot closer to my home, it would be much more convenient. Also, it took me a very long time to settle in on a therapist due to them not understanding where I'm coming from as an African-American woman when it comes to discrimination and different challenges I face every day. So that's very, it's sometimes difficult, or it was difficult for me to find someone that understood me. Yeah, that's a really good point. And I think that lack of competent care is really is something that strikes a lot of different communities and something I've experienced too. You know, I think growing up down south, a lot of my depression and stuff stemmed from being closeted and gay in the South. And all of the care for mental health treatment that was out there for me was very religious-based and very negative. sort of like the better thing for you to do is is fight these demons right when that's not i needed

to embrace my my pride embrace my rainbow right that's what would have really helped me i also think that um particularly for uh people of color when you go to a a counselor who can't relate to you culturally and relate to your background, you automatically just feel othered. And it's hard to be honest with your truth when you're feeling that headspace. And I also say that culturally competent care doesn't necessarily mean you must seek out therapy from someone who shares your exact background. Right. I've got between therapists and therapists and therapists and therapists.

And the first one that I felt really saw or heard me was a white woman in her early 90s. You know, we could not have been more different, honestly. A white straight, cisgender woman, you know, and in her 90s. But she saw me, you know what I mean? In a way that that also comes with, like, experience and having dealt, had clients of all those different, you know, backgrounds. Yeah. Yeah, I had a similar experience. The very first time I ever went to a therapist, it was back when I was 20, and it was a Caucasian male.

And when I was talking about, you know, the fact that my dad was in and out of my life, you know, my mom is going through this when I was a child. And this is why I act. And I'm trying to figure out why I feel depressed and why I feel the way that I feel and why I think the way that I think. he didn't really I didn't I wasn't getting like a back and forth from him um all he said was try meditating so that one thing him saying that I was 21 when um I was like okay yeah I have something going on like there's no way that I feel this way every single day so going to him and him just saying oh well you just need to meditate come back in a week and pay me my co-pay like that was too, that was crazy for me.

So I, for 11 years, didn't go to a therapist or seek another therapist because I was like, they're all going to be this way. I don't want to, you know, I don't want to do this. Yeah, it's so true. And you know, one of my things, this, you know, it's not necessarily a cultural thing, but to me, if you're going and seeking treatment for anything related to depression and your therapist's first piece of advice. is you should do more things that make you happy.

That's a, it's a, it's a, it's a no go for me. Like, I could have got that advice from my mom, right? I mean, like, that's not, when you're depressed, it's not as easy as do things that make you happy because you don't have the motivation to do things that make you happy because you're depressed, right? It's not that, not that simple. Yeah. So let's talk about stigmas.

I know you've had some experience with this, but what sorts of stigmas exist in the African-American community in regards. to mental health and in regards to getting help for your mental health? So my family, I'll start with the way I was raised. The way I was raised, I was raised by a single African-American mother who worked hard to provide for me. My grandma took care of me the majority of the time. And my dad was in and out of my life.

So once I realized that I was something was wrong or like I thought differently, I told my mother, and at the time she wasn't, she went to school for psychology eventually, but once I told her like, Mom, I don't feel normal. I don't know what's going on. My mind is, I'm freezing up. I can't think. I can't do anything. She didn't understand at the time. So that's when she told me to go to the counselor. She said she always knew something was up, but she just didn't want to say anything. So getting help was something I had to seek out on my own. Once my family found out that I was seeking counseling, they kind of thought that I was crazy.

I felt like they thought like I wasn't strong enough. Because growing up the way that I grew up, I only seen my mom cry maybe three, four times in my entire time. So I feel like I was raised to be a strong woman and just ignore the way that I feel. And that's all fine in dandy, but I couldn't, I couldn't do that. I couldn't ignore the fact that sometimes I just didn't want to be present and not in a negative aspect, like taking my life. I just didn't want to be anywhere with anyone.

I just wanted to be alone. I'm already an only child, so it scared my mother. So my family just told me that I was nuts. And I think that's, I think it's very present in the African American community. when you are seeking help that your family, sometimes they'll be supportive, but sometimes they won't understand why you can't just be strong. And I couldn't be strong. I couldn't be as strong as my mom or the way that I saw her.

It was just very difficult for me. Yeah. Wow. Yeah, that's intense. So how did you overcome those social barriers within your community, within your family and come to the decision to get treatment yourself? It actually stemmed from a relationship about, well, I think my last relationship ended when I was 29. I'm 31 now.

And I realized that the person that I was dating at the time was a narcissist. And I didn't know that until I was out of the situation. So with that triggering my past feelings, I've always felt depressed, didn't know what was going on. but this intensified to the point where my depression was a fog. I don't remember, this is crazy to say to some people, they are like, what? I don't remember the last like year and a half of my life because I was, it's kind of like the movie Click with Adam Sandler, you know when he would like rewind or fast forward? And then he'd be like, what did I do to get here?

I woke up one day. It was like, what did I do to get here? and it took a classmate of mine dying the end of last year to realize I had I really had no impact and I felt like if I were to pass away, no one would remember me because I haven't done anything. So that kind of like woke me up and I started to seek a therapist to get assistance and help. And she's been amazing. It was it was hard for me to come to that conclusion because I always try to be strong and follow in the footsteps of my mom. But I had to realize like I'm not my mother. And, you know, she got through things that I probably wouldn't be able to get through myself.

Wow. Yeah. That's incredible. Yeah. I, yeah, I can really relate to that. sentiment of thinking about what happens if I pass, right? Who who cares? Yeah. Right. That was a real, that was a real moment for me as well. There was a time, you know, this is, I always said I would be honest in this job. There was a time maybe four years ago and now at this point where I'm

happily married, had foster kids at the time, had it, you know, all the things that I ever wanted out of my life was leading a team at my former job and, you know, thriving. And I, um, on the underside of that, what a lot of people don't see was heavily suicidal. And it was that thought of who cares if I die that really started to, I started to feel like this is becoming too real. It's starting to become more than thoughts. I'm like. I might act on this that led me to reach out and get help. And I was really lucky at my old job. And we have the same sort of thing here at EXP where, you know, we have the employee

assistance program. You can call in. You can get some help. They can help you identify someone. They picked out this woman. This is when I spoke to the 90-year-old white woman who helped me, you know, figure my stuff out and give me a safety plan. And, you know, I think the message we really want to get across, particularly for people to come from a minority background, when it comes to your mental health, you don't have to wait for a crisis to get help.

Exactly. Right. Especially when you know something is going on in your mind. And I come from a heavily religious family. The entirety of my roots is based in religion. So a huge thing for me that I forgot to mention is they always, my family always told me, well, God can get you through it. And why that may be true for some people, it just like God created others to help you others. So that's my personal opinion of that situation.

So it was always like, oh, well, you just need to pray. Oh, well, you just need to do this. oh, well, you just need to do that. And it never worked and I never understood that. So that's like a huge thing as well is, although I might be religious and I do believe in equality and my family does not, religion played a huge factor on why I didn't want to get help as well because I was like maybe I can just pray it away. Yeah, yeah.

And for me, mental health had a stigma because all the counselors, I went. to the only thing they gave me was pray, right? They didn't give me any other tools to use to help myself. Prayer wasn't working for me. It was something going on in my brain chemistry that I needed to address, right? Right. So let's talk about the real estate side of this a little bit. What are some culturally sensitive approaches that EXP realty agents can adopt

when they're working with clients from diverse backgrounds to ensure that their mental well-being is considered during the home selling and buying process. So I feel like it's important to stay educated about different cultural norms, values, and practices. That will help you understand your client's perspective and avoid misunderstandings. And then also continuously learning and adapting, staying informed about evolving cultural dynamics, seek feedback from clients, and be open to constructive criticism.

I think that's huge. Yeah, yeah, that's a big piece of it is you've got to be, you got to keep your ears and your mind open when you're dealing with clients from a different background than yours. And if you really feel that you're super culturally disconnected from one of your clients, we have all these 1EXP resource groups, right? And they're not just four people from that group. They're for you as an agent to join to learn more about being inclusive in your selling process and buying process. So I would say if you're disconnected from your client, the first thing you do is go find that community at EXP and seek out the health. The members there, use them as a sounding board, you know, educate yourself, attend some of those events, you know, look at some of their past video content on their workplace group and see if you can get some new understanding. I think it's also a really cool opportunity for you to have a good referral network,

if there are other services and stuff that your clients need, and you want to look for a culturally appropriate option. One EXP groups are there for you. We also always plug that if you're part of a group that isn't represented by a 1EXP resource group and you want to be, we have the DEI. Champions program. So you can come to us with a pitch for a group and we at the DEI team will help you grow that idea into a living, breathing organism on workplace and then pitch you to 1EXP to become a new resource group. We don't by any means think that we are covering all the bases.

So if your base isn't covered, let us know. Now let's talk about representation, right? this is a big part of the DEI conversation period. But can you discuss the importance of representation and diversity within the real estate business and how that can positively impact the mental health outcomes for our minority communities? Yeah, I feel when real estate professional come from diverse backgrounds and communities, they bring a deeper understanding and the cultural understanding allows them to empathize with their clients' experiences and provide personalized support through the home buying process. Also, representation in the real estate industry helps build trust between agents and minority

clients. When clients see professionals who share their cultural background or have a demonstrated commitment to diversity, they are more likely to feel understood. good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'd agree with that. I think, you know, representation matters, period. And historically, minority communities that face systemic barriers and discrimination in housing, they always have. And by, like, increasing the representation and diversity in the industry, professionals can actively challenge these biases and work for its equitable housing access for all. That's like, you know, fair housing is sort of the name of the game. And then when minority clients, counter professionals who advocate for their rights and their concerns, that positively impacts

their mental health and reduces their stress and frustration and all that stuff is associated with discrimination. So, you know, it's it's the same sort of bit that we see about why representation is important in the media, right? Because it matters to people that they can see people in this industry that look and sound like them. If a minority person, say a young homeowner has never seen anything but a race or gender or background that is opposite of them in the real estate business. They've never seen someone they can relate to. They are just less likely to be inclined to want to buy a home. Or they go into the home buying process with the ready expectation that I'm going to have to deal with someone who doesn't get it.

Right. 100%. I agree. Yeah. And I feel like it's the same way in the mental health space, right? Oh, yeah. It definitely is. Never see anybody that relates to you.

Or understands what you're going through. That's huge. Yeah. It's very difficult to find someone who is like, oh, yeah, I've been through that. Or even if you're not from the same cultural background, just going through certain situations. if you don't have someone that understands where you're coming from, it's very difficult to connect with that person. Well, Morgan, I'm really grateful that you're on my team.

I'm really grateful that you were our second-ever guest on the CultureCast. And this has been a great conversation. To learn more about any of this stuff, join us at Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion on Workplace. You can join the Healthy Mind Collective on Workplace. Also, if you join the DEI group, we have right at the top pinned a list of all the resource groups, and you can click on the links within that list to join any of them.

I hope you're looking forward to more episodes of the CultureCast, and for now we'll sign off. Morgan, thank you again. Thank you.