KGCI: Real Estate on Air - The Human Side of Real Estate - Stories of Resilience and Growth Kaelee Cornell Episode

Starting point is 00:00:00 Morning Primer, picking up where mindset and motivation Monday left off. No hype, just strategy mindset and direction from KGCI, Real Estate on Air. Welcome to Real Estate Real World, where we talk to the movers, shakers, and leaders that are getting it done right now in the real estate industry and beyond. I'm your host, Marguerite Chris Billow, and I started this podcast simply dedicated to calling people about what's really happening in this crazy roller coaster ride of real estate. Be sure to subscribe on iTunes and stay up to date on the newest stuff by adding yourself to the list at www. www.realestaterealworld.com. Now let's dive into the world of real estate. Hello everybody.

Starting point is 00:01:04 Marguerite Chris Fellow here. And guess what time it is? Time for Real Estate Real World, where we get to talk to all the cool people in the real estate industry and beyond. And we get to spend some time listening to people's stories, background, what inspires them. and what makes them tick. So today we have a fantastic guest, my friend Kaylee Cornell, who I have known in the real estate industry for a few years now. And I'm really excited to hear her story because the interesting thing is when you're in the real estate world and you have all these people you connect with, you can hear parts and pieces, but you don't always spend a whole lot of time

Starting point is 00:01:42 getting to know people at a deeper level. And Kaylee is somebody who, whenever you get around her, she just always makes you smile. So at least she always makes me smile and makes me happy. So today, let me tell you a little bit about her. She is a distinguished title in escrow sales executive and is known for her remarkable journey to success, marked by her unwavering dedication and a strong work ethic. She started as an aspiring professional in the mortgage industry,

Starting point is 00:02:10 devoting numerous hours to learning the intricacies of the real estate process and gradually made her mark in the field. She's well regarded for her innovative use of social media to demystify the world of title and escrow. And in 2022, her exceptional performance was recognized when she was named the second highest producer for onboarding new business by a national coaching company. Since 2018, Kaylee has been a licensed realtor and notary, leveraging these qualifications to enhance the services she offers her partners. and her infectious passion and ability to deeply understand her client's needs have cemented her position as a trusted advisor in the industry. Kaylee's journey is a testament to the power of hard work, perseverance, and dedication.

Starting point is 00:02:54 And it reminds us that success is earned, not given, and serves as an inspiration to pursue her own dreams with relentless determination. Kaylee, my friend, welcome, welcome to real estate, real world. Hello, Marguerite. Thank you so much for having me. am really excited and honored to be here sharing with you and your whole audience today. Thank you. We're just as honored to have you here today. I remember briefly when you could blast it onto the scene, right? And I was like, who's that gal? And because you were everywhere, like everywhere I went,

Starting point is 00:03:29 you were there and you were always very visible and you've been extraordinary in what you have done within the real estate industry. Welcome. I'm happy to have you here today. I have to share a secret. I have cloned myself. Oh, good to know. That's how I was able to get around. No, it was a real sinker swim entry into the industry. I knew I was up against a lot because I was new. I had no prior relationships or affiliations. And so I knew that I really had to make a splash, make a name. And the name of the game was be everywhere. So I'm glad to see that it works. What's funny is now with AI, somebody a couple weeks ago sent me an audio and I would have sworn it was actually them and it was an audio done by the AI. I was like, that's a little creepy.

Starting point is 00:04:19 It's funny that you bring that up because I actually today was just reading an article that was put out about the, we all have these trepidations about being on video and there's a lot of people who are just very uncomfortable with it. And now people are utilizing AI on the chat GPT side to create a script and then AI to actually create these automated videos that looks like them talking, utilizing the scripts they wrote. Wow. And they're not them on video. So I think we're going to see a really interesting transition to that utilization to not only promote yourself, but fill in that space of historically I was not able to be on video and now here I am everywhere.

Starting point is 00:05:01 Yeah. It's the whole thing is crazy. But anyway, that's not what our topic was really going to be about today. It's funny. These conversations, you never know which way they're going. But what I would like to know is I would love to hear a little bit about you and your background and like where you come from and what got you to hear. So I have to admit, this is honestly the first time that I'm really sharing my story in a public way and all at once. So I am not typically one who's affected by nerves, but I'm nervous right now. Let's just get Don't be nervous. We love you. So I think when people hear this, they're going to be really surprised because who I am today is it doesn't lend to this type of past. So I actually, I'm a Sacramento native, born and raised here. And my parents got divorced at a very young age. And it was a really ugly, violent, horrific divorce.

Starting point is 00:05:59 So I honestly don't ever remember a time that they were together. All I remember is the things that we had to go through during their divorce. Much of my childhood is actually blacked out. I really have a hard time remembering anything before the age of 10. But what I do remember is just constant police firefighters at my house. I didn't really understand why, but it was because they were in physical alterc. My mother actually struggled with mental disease. So she was eventually diagnosed with schizophrenia, bipolar. She was manic depressive. And so it made sense of all of her behavior down the line, but not so much while she was in it. Are you an only child or did you have siblings? I am actually the middle of five. So I like to call myself the diplomat, educated to the younger and the older.

Starting point is 00:06:56 So that also made everything much more challenging because after my parents split, my dad was a single father trying to raise five kids in the 90s. And interestingly enough, the default in the 90s from the court side was really let's side with the mother. The children belong with their mother. It doesn't matter the situation. And so there was always this tendency to forgive her to give her leeway. In fact, I remember my dad, telling me a story that one of the times that she came over and physically assaulted him, they had to go to court for this. And the judge actually started reading him the charges as if he was the aggressor. And his lawyer had to chime in and say, my client is the victim. And so there was just a lot of discrimination. And it made it really difficult for a single man in that time to fight for his right to raise his children. And not only that, he had a really great job. He retired as a fire captain with Sacramento Metro. And he was a firefighter. He got in early. But that wasn't enough. He was raising five children. So he actually was working five jobs at a time doing literally selling his

Starting point is 00:08:13 blood platelets, doing whatever he could to make enough money just to get by. So it's, it's something that I look back on. and I have a lot of admiration for. But at the time, all I saw was both my parents are gone all the time. And it was really difficult for me. And so I thought, I'm just another kid from a broken home. And it started to get significantly worse. When they first were divorced, it was, you know, 50-50 custody. So we would spend two weeks with my mom, two weeks with my dad.

Starting point is 00:08:47 And eventually her mental state began to deteriorate more and more. she turned to drugs and alcohol, attempted suicide several times. And that is when the courts ultimately said, you're not fit to have custody of your kids. So they gave custody to my father. And we were allowed supervised custody visits with her every, it was like every other weekend, I think. How old were you at this point? This is when I was 10. And I very vividly remember, I didn't know that she had attempted suicide a couple times, but it was not a very thorough attempt from what my dad described, but I very vividly remember when I was 10 years old, my dad came and picked us up. We were staying with my mom, and I didn't know what had happened. We had all been out with our friends because we'd like to be

Starting point is 00:09:36 out of the house. And he came and picked us up, and we didn't know why. And it turns out that she had stabbed herself in the stomach. It was actually really gruesome, but it's not. It's not a normal approach that most women especially take with suicide, because historically and statistically, interestingly enough, when it comes to suicide, women are even thinking of after they are gone that they don't want people to find them in a mess. So typically they'll do, they'll take pills. But she was really dedicated and determined to end her life. And so that was when I really remember things being different. We had to go through a lot of mediation, a lot of psych vet evolves and nobody really told us what was going on. I just knew that mommy was in the hospital

Starting point is 00:10:24 and we don't get to stay with her anymore. And it was, that's the transition of when things really started to go downhill. And she got more and more into drugs. We saw her less and less. And then she got to this point where I would only hear from her if I was having to pick her up from the hospital or she was just getting out of jail. And she was homeless for me. many years. And this was in my teen years, I was 15, 16 at this point in time. And it got to the point where I was just waiting for the phone call from the police of, we found your mother's body. Yeah. I had just gone to acceptance of this is how this is going to end. She's never going to get out of this. She's never going to get help because she didn't want help. And also with her mental

Starting point is 00:11:15 disabilities, she was so easily controlled. And there were a lot of people around her that were willing to control her and abuse her. So from my perspective, I didn't think that I was ever going to really see her again or get to have a mom in my life. I just accepted that sooner or later, she was going to be that homeless person that you read about on the news and the other dead body, drug epidemic. And so that was my reality for most of my teenage and young adult life. And it was it's something that I'm still discovering and still learning about. And my father is just getting to a point where he is able to open up and share his experience during that time in our lives. And fortunately for me and my two older siblings, we remember a lot of her and the childhood that we

Starting point is 00:12:04 were able to have with her. But my two younger siblings who were very young when they got divorced and even younger when all of this was transpiring. So they have. of really no memory of which I don't remember much. Yeah. And it breaks my heart because I do remember there being good times. And I do remember that I believe she believed she was trying to the best of her ability. But for them, they have a lot of anger and resentment towards the whole situation. So it's really difficult. And I'm really happy at this point in my life, she is sober. She's in a facility that takes care of her. She'll never be able to live on her own again. The degradation of her brain and everything else from years of drugs and the exacerbation of her diseases,

Starting point is 00:12:53 she will never be able to live alone as an adult. So she's at least in a place where she has access to food, medication, people making sure she's showered and all of that. And we get to talk once a week. So it's interesting and pleasant to have her in my life. And it's also this weird paradox of sadness because who I see is just a shell of the person that I know she used to be. And it makes me sad that she will never be that person again. And I see this human without purpose. And I think that our purpose is what drives us to keep living. And when we lose purpose, we start to die. And I think that's why when people retire, they quickly find another job or do something else because they realized retirement isn't this amazing vision that it cracks us up to be

Starting point is 00:13:47 because we don't have that purpose every day to get up and do what we used to do. So we have to find something else to live and strive for. Keep in mind, there's different versions of purpose. And so one of my favorite books of all time is called Conversations with God. And I'm not a personally, I'm not a strong religious person, but I'm very spiritual. I believe in higher power. And in conversations with God, it's a series of books that help me through the death of my son. And in there, it talks about how, and whatever people believe, it doesn't matter. It's what the book says, but that you come to this planet multiple times, right? And you come here to either learn a lesson or give a lesson.

Starting point is 00:14:32 And I think that sometimes when we think that someone might not be having purpose in their life, that their purpose might be to help you learn what your purpose is. I have goosebumps that you brought that up because it's something that I've been ruminating on is really just sometimes our biggest lesson that we can learn from people is what not to do. And yeah, I grew up very religious too. I was born and raised in the Mormon church, actually. It's the one resource that my mom did have when she was functional that got her through and was able to support us while she was living as a single mother.

Starting point is 00:15:07 And I'm really grateful for that. However, it really convoluted my relationship with my beliefs. And I was very angry at God for a long time, which made me everything that I went through in my life made me for a while believe that there is no God because I only have this religious construct of what God was. And in the past few years throughout my own personal development and exploration of my spirituality, I was able to. really embrace and connect with what I knew God to be, which wasn't what it was defined as in some book or by some organization. But it was much deeper than that and much more universal and much, just very transcendental. So I've been able to rekindle that relationship and it's helped me so greatly on this journey. You should read those books. I think it's like a three book series. They're called Conversations with God. Neal Donald Walsh, I think, is the author. And it's just to me fascinating because I grew up with a single mom as well. My mom was married several times.

Starting point is 00:16:15 She passed away in 2009. And we were homeless for a period of time and lots of different people in and out of our life. And I've spent a lot of my life in therapy, as I think everyone needs to do. And which I think what I love is that you can't heal the brain with the same brain that got you there. So you got to have somebody else give you some insight. And I learned that in similar to what you said is that my mom did the best job she knew how with the tools that she had at the time, right? And I really didn't understand my mom a whole lot until my grandmother came to live with me. And when my grandmother came to live with me, I was like, oh, I understand a lot more, right, about where they came from.

Starting point is 00:16:59 And I just think that had you not lived through what you had lived through or experienced, you wouldn't be who you are today. That's that all that the good and the bad of that experience is what actually defines you. Truly. And that's really one of the reasons why I'm here today. And one of the things I think I have to overcome on my personal journey is that sharing this part of my past will help people not only humanize it humanizes me. It shows people that what you write this successful. whatever you describe me as, whatever you think when you see me, it brings me down to earth.

Starting point is 00:17:42 And it makes people feel like they can really approach and relate to me when maybe they couldn't before because now they think, oh, that's something that I can relate to her on. I've had a lot of challenges in my life. I didn't come from a, we grew up very poor. And so now people can really say, there's so much more to her. And that makes me want to be able to connect with her. And that's really one of the things that I love most about. this role that I'm in is I get to meet and connect with so many different humans. And I really think

Starting point is 00:18:13 that's the special talent and gift that I have as a human is I can create space for anyone to show up as you are and feel welcome and feel embraced and feel seen and not feel like you have to show up in any type of way. And it's something that I've actually, I work with my wife a lot too because she comes from a very different background, totally opposite of how I was raised. And so there's oftentimes a lot of judgments and perceived ideas about a person just based off of how they look or how they might be acting. And so I've really imparted on her create space. It doesn't mean that person is going to be in life in your life forever, but you can spend five minutes, them and take something away from that. And I think that's really the beautiful opportunity that we all

Starting point is 00:19:05 have as humans is to just connect and take something away with it. Even if it's a three minute connection or a three hour connection, whatever it is, there's something that we can all learn from each other. And I really want to spread that. Yeah, it's interesting to me because I've said this many times before. It's a quote and come up with somehow. Is it as connected as this universe that we live in, this world we live in now with social media and everything, people are still craving a connection, right? And the part, the challenge with, even in our industry, there's so much that happens in the real estate industry where people are creating this image that they want the world to see that is not necessarily the real world, which is really a part of this podcast,

Starting point is 00:19:55 is trying to show people like what really is going on. Not an end. negative light, it doesn't mean that if I see the real you that I'm going to judge you or not like you or anything like that. But I think there's so much with social media these days and so much in this industry of people creating an unrealistic image is all I can say. It's not very realistic. And it's funny because I was talking to my therapist the other day. I was like, I'm not totally sure like what I want to do. And she goes, she goes, I see you as a very wide. Owl is somebody who had so much life experience. There's a long list we'd have to do. No, but each of those experiences allows you to learn from and grow from and then create the space to relate or connect

Starting point is 00:20:46 to somewhere else. Because I come from a different generation than you where things were not as accepted or not as open. Funny story. So my dad had a younger brother named Tony. And my parents divorced when I was young as well. So I didn't see my Uncle Tony very often. And I'd see him every once in a while, but I grew up in a small town. I grew up in Chico. And at this time in history, we're talking the 70s and 80s. The word gay was like it was never discussed or it was taboo.

Starting point is 00:21:18 It was not. It wasn't even taboo. It just was never a conversation. Like I really don't ever remember ever even having any conversation or thinking about it one way or another. So my uncle Tony, I'm 22 years old. I call my Uncle Tony. He lived in Fair Oaks and I said, hey, I just broke up with my boyfriend. Can I come like sleep on your couch for a month or two while I get a job and all that? There's, oh, sure, sweetheart, come on down. So I go down and pretty quickly, I'm a little confused.

Starting point is 00:21:47 Like, I'm not quite sure what's going on. He had a ton of guy friends. And I'm not judging or thinking anything. But I called my mom and I said, mom is Uncle Tony gay? And she goes, oh, yeah. He's always gay and I said really like I I didn't even know and I didn't know who he was or anything and I love my uncle Tony sadly he passed away in in 1980s he had AIDS and back then that's a whole other story too because that was pretty brutal back then but what an extraordinary human being it was and so what I love now in areas is that the world not everywhere but at least most areas it's much more it's an easier conversation. It's much more accepted and it's much more embraced to just be who you are. It doesn't matter whether you're gay, whatever you are. It doesn't matter as much anymore,

Starting point is 00:22:37 although I know there's still a lot of judgment, but it's crazy how much it's. I'm just fascinated by why anybody goes there in that judgment world, but I know that it's a different generation. And my generation, as I feel has become much more educated. Like I think, education is the key. And learning to accept people for whatever that situation is, but learning about their background, like in your situation, brings you to who you are. And I think if we can just love and accept people more for where they are and not take into consideration where they've come from, that's probably the most important thing. Yeah, absolutely. I had that same challenge, actually, with my wife's family. They're very Italian Catholic. Her family is like her mom is third generation

Starting point is 00:23:29 Italian. They still speak it fluently. And my only saving grace with with them is that my wife and I were really good friends for years before we were ever romantically involved. And so her family already loved me. And when we came out to them, it was really difficult. And her mom especially, she, struggled with it because her beliefs and her lifestyle and her parents and her family told her this and here I am. She wanted to dislike me, but she'd already loved me so much. And that was really, I think only my saving grace. If I had come in as a stranger to the situation and was just introduced this to my girlfriend, the entire situation would have been very different. And I'm not sure that we would still be together because it was challenging. And we're still working through it even to this day.

Starting point is 00:24:21 and I'm really blessed and grateful that they have really warmed up to me. They've warmed up to us. They support us. They were there for every step of the way through our wedding and everything else. So I'm really grateful for how that is. But it's a huge reminder that people from different generations have that mindset. And they're still getting used to all of this terminology and everything. I'm still trying to catch up with the way that we're learning and growing and expanding

Starting point is 00:24:50 and accepting people is who they are. But I know that for, it's challenging for me. So I can only imagine how difficult it is for somebody from a previous generation to really embrace and accept all of that. How has any of that affected or impacted your job, your role and what you do within the real estate industry? That's a great question. I would love to say that it doesn't.

Starting point is 00:25:17 However, I know that there. are certain people that I just don't share that with. And they will talk about and assume that I haven't been and I just let them because I know that with certain generations, it's not as accepting as it is with somebody who is my age, for example. So it's an interesting thing. I know in certain company, I can talk very freely about it. And in certain another company, I can't. And it's a really strange feeling because I embrace who I am. I'm never going to be ashamed of who I am. And I'm going to tell you exactly who I am. And yet, I live out of integrity with that sometimes in the professional world because everybody has their own opinion about this. And my personal opinion

Starting point is 00:26:06 is that in the professional world, my personal life is not more important than my business. and that's solely around my professional identity. So if it comes down to, does my personal life, could have potentially compromise my professional relationship with this person, then my personal life doesn't get mentioned. Because ultimately, I'm not willing to compromise a professional relationship based off of their differing beliefs. And my wife is in the same position.

Starting point is 00:26:39 She works with a lot of accounts that are based out of North Carolina. very Bible Belt Christian companies. And so she's in the same boat. And it's a weird dichotomy because we both want to be proud and recognized as a married couple. And at the same time, we both understand the professional world. And that sometimes you have to separate that. And it's really heartbreaking that we still are in a society where that has to be the case. However, with her and I, we are at this place. We understand what it is. We know that it doesn't actually. actually affect our personal relationship. And on the other side of it is a better life for us because we can maintain and facilitate these professional relationships. And it doesn't affect our personal

Starting point is 00:27:24 life. It only benefits our personal life because then we're really relevant in the freedom that those professional relationships provide for us. Interesting. It's interesting to me because I think that in every, it's not the same, but in every situation, you have levels of of connections, levels of relationships, levels of where you can go with a conversation, right? I guess like you have a lot of people that things are very surface and it's, oh, hey, how are you? And that's the end of the conversation. And then there are other people that you have an opportunity to get to know at a deeper level. And rarely do I feel like I, when I've had somebody that I've had the opportunity to get to know in that deeper level, rarely is it a negative?

Starting point is 00:28:13 for me, right? Like, I'm excited or honored or blessed to be able to have those deeper conversations, because that's what life is all about, right? It's like connecting at those, at those deeper levels with people and loving them for who they are and where they are. Because if I could be a resource in any way for people that are feeling like their, your family isn't always the best place. right like you can have friends that are more like family than your own family like my mom's passed away my dad's passed away they've all moved on so it's on the top of the heap at this point but those are the conversations that are worth having more and you can't have them with everybody of course everyone's at a different place in their life but those are the conversations worth

Starting point is 00:29:07 having that if you can help or connect in some way yeah and I love that you brought that up because in our industry in particular, our conversations and everything is so transactional. It's hard to get below the surface when you're in that conversation. Like you mentioned, hey, how are you? It becomes a script and it's an automated transactional conversation. So I used to call it the energy vampires, but I heard a term recently that I love much more and it's energy leakage. And it's this constant output without recharging and refilling.

Starting point is 00:29:45 And I previously would say, I don't get that. Nobody wants to dive down below the surface. And in my growth and development, I realized that I can't wait for somebody to bring that to me. I have the power and the opportunity to create that with someone. So I now take it as a personal responsibility to ask those questions to other people that get below the surface. and then they're right there in the space with me and they'll ask them back. And so it's less energy leakage and more energy input that's shared. And that's where I'm at right now in my role in this industry is really wanting to get

Starting point is 00:30:24 below the surface and impact people. And I think that's the best good that we can do with the challenges we've overcome. And I think that's something that you're so phenomenal at because you have been given challenge after hardship in your life. And not only do you handle it with grace and just like the most beautiful compassion, but you take it a step further and you give back. You want to help people that are in that place and help them overcome it. And me, that's like the ultimate, you are absolute super human when you can take all of your

Starting point is 00:31:03 hardships in life, not only overcome them, but then use them to give back. and help other people. And you're such a phenomenal human being. And you do this every single day. And I just love that I get to be close to you and watch you do it. Thank you so much. I feel like it becomes your responsibility. Like I can never think of that one quote where they say take your tragedy and let it become your testimony.

Starting point is 00:31:25 But I feel like I said, people as much as we're connected, how disconnected this world is. The people need to be, they need someone that they can. I don't know. I don't know if I like the word look up to, but somebody that they can connect with that can maybe give them some input and advice and maybe help them potentially change the trajectory of their lives. I've seen some people make a dramatic shift and a dramatic turn just by being able to connect with somebody who believed in them or gave them some indication that it was possible for them, right? Because I didn't have that growing up. My mom, I got, I had,

Starting point is 00:32:06 shirts made that said I'm the boss of me because I think it's hilarious. My mom used to call me star as a kid and always called me star because I was always very strong and independent and I was going to do it my way or the highway. And now that I'm older and wiser, I've learned not to be tough or critical and to be more of an open book because I think people can definitely relate in a better way when they can see what you have been through or what you have experienced, right? like my experiences could potentially and as can yours so i have a question though how is your dad thank you for asking he's amazing he is officially retired from the fire department but he's always been the type of person that loves he gets excited about something he picks up a hobby and then he

Starting point is 00:32:54 learns everything he can about it and becomes a master of it so he has all these incredible hobbies and now he gets to spend all this time just creating and he's also a massive history buff. Oh, wow. Yes. He started in Roman history, got really obsessed with Roman history, learned everything about the Romans, their rise and fall, even did like Roman sword fighting. Like he is all in. He's an incredible person to talk to. And he's also really inspired and obsessed with World War II specifically. So he does research. He's gone back and done tours,

Starting point is 00:33:34 like D-Day tours, and he is just the ultimate history buff, and he is an incredible storyteller. And I love now that I'm in a place where I can appreciate that because teenage Kaylee would just roll her eyes and be like, oh, exactly. I drive again. But now I can't get enough. And I think that part of that really relates to what you're talking about, that connection. And this is something that I ruminate on all the time because I have. have a theory and I've really been exploring this. And I think that we're in this picture perfect world

Starting point is 00:34:10 with social media. Everybody gets to pick that second image of this is my best self and then portray that. And we are in a world where we're more connected than ever, but people are lonelier than ever. And I think it's because that connection is so void of the physical vibration that we get when we are in proximity actually really connecting with another human. And people have become so dependent on that digital world, we think and we feel like we're being connected. But all of the chemistry in our brain and our physiology is completely starving for that physical human connection.

Starting point is 00:34:51 It doesn't have to be like touching. But we all have an energy. It's proven that we are made of energy and energy never dies. So there's a reason. why when we get around certain people, they make us light up. They make us feel happy or they make us feel sad or whatever way we walk away feeling affected. And it could be negative or it could be positive, but that's just the result of human connection. And this digital age has robbed us of the ability to do that. And so I really feel like that's one of the things that is our biggest obstacle

Starting point is 00:35:28 in humanity today with social media. But it's also something that I just, I love to connect and really live and listen when my dad is talking because he's so passionate about it. And he's almost to the point of emotional about it sometimes because he just respects what happened during World War II. All of the heroes, all of the travesties. He learns so much from it.

Starting point is 00:35:54 And he's just such an incredible person. I really, I like to. put him on the spot as much as possible. I would love to meet him someday. I'll have to. I'm going to make sure that happens because he's such a cool. He's such a dork too. Like he's one of the funniest people I've ever met,

Starting point is 00:36:09 but he's so incredibly intelligent. And I know him. So I'm always like, oh, he's just a big bear. But I realize now that I bring him out of his shell and I force him to come with, come have dinner with your in-laws, that he's actually a really shy person when you first meet him.

Starting point is 00:36:25 And I just really enjoy getting to, learn and know him when I thought that I did. But now I'm learning and knowing him from a different perspective because I've changed. And so that allows me to see him differently. Which is so important. I think you're me having grown children now. Like my kids are my youngest are 26 and 28. And Jake just had a baby. And it's interesting. Thank you. It's interesting to have more adult conversations. And I think my son, Philip, he's with CalPro, home inspector. And I just adore him. And what's funny is his birthday is two days after mine. So our personalities are very similar. And he's 38 now. So it's interesting to have the different conversations with your kids who now see you as a human being,

Starting point is 00:37:15 as opposed to seeing you as a parent figure. And I think my greatest joy has been my kids and being able to have conversations with them now. You talk about your childhood. My childhood, as I mentioned earlier, the most important thing to me was I wanted strong relationships with my kids and I wanted to create a life for them that was different than mine and be able to have those conversations with them. And I feel incredibly blessed at this point in my life that I have good relationships with my kids. We've not, we've had our moments. I'm sure you could get some dirt out of Phillips. if you wanted to. But I think that's really our goal as human beings is to be able to pass the torch or pay it forward or be able to bring up good humans. So what is your goal or plan? What's next for you

Starting point is 00:38:10 in what you're doing? That's a great question because I've been trying to find the answer for that too. And I've always been the type of person where when I was younger and people to ask what you would want to be when you grow up, I didn't have an answer. And I feel like now looking back hindsight 2020 and all that, I feel like the reason I never wanted to say I want to be this is because it would confine me to only that. And my life has been a course of doors opening that I never expected to open and walking through them. And honestly, that's how I ended up here. I was doing hard money loans living in Los Angeles and knew I was going to move back to Sacramento and loved putting together loans. And so through a life coach, got connected with the mortgage loan officer.

Starting point is 00:38:56 And then that transpired. And now I'm entitled and escrow. So I don't know what that looks like. I know how it feels. And that really lends it into what I wanted to really share about success and how we define it because I recently struggled with that when I was recognized for my production in onboarding new business. I had this like identity crisis because I was being celebrated for my work and my achievements and my production, but it didn't really land on me because I didn't feel like I deserved it. And I felt my idea of success looks differently. I have this much money in the bank and I have this many investment properties and we're this with the family. There were all these external things that didn't line up and really robbed me of my ability.

Starting point is 00:39:49 to celebrate that success and that achievement. And so I have really recently just been trying to truly define what success is so that I can say that's where I want to be and that's where I want to go. And what I've discovered really for me is that success is a feeling. And it's a feeling of completeness and it's a feeling of wholeness and joy and gratitude. and it's a place where I feel like I have enough to really give back and help and put all of my energy and effort into helping other people. So I think that's where I'm headed. And I'm starting to really to be able to do that now in my line of work. And I don't know how it looks in the future,

Starting point is 00:40:36 but I know that a door is going to open and it's going to be the right door for me. It's interesting the word success because I know for me, I've had so many different versions of it over the years. I'll be, it'll be 30 years for me in December to be in the real estate industry. And my version of success has changed probably 50 times. I don't even know. And sometimes I think that people think that success is a destination. Yeah. And I really don't believe that it's a destination. I believe it's just whatever path you're on right now, because that path might change. And I've hit the highs and I've hit the lows. And the lows are what got me to get past that. Like I just posted a quote that says, you can't have a breakthrough without a breakdown.

Starting point is 00:41:21 Oh, I was so good. And many times that's when that breakthrough really comes through is when you get to that place where you're like, okay, okay, God, I'm not sure what your plan is. But I need a little direction. I need a little sign. I need a little signal something like smoke signals. I don't care what you send. But I need something that helps me go in the right direction. And every time I look at those breakthroughs, I know that there was a significant breakdown right before that.

Starting point is 00:41:52 And so I think you have to embrace that a little bit. And the answers will be clear. Doubt means don't. Sit tight until the answers are clear and they'll show up. And you're a beautiful, amazing, talented human being. And I feel really honored to know you as a person. And I'm so glad you were here today. And I really look forward to getting to know you more.

Starting point is 00:42:11 You'll have to come out and have a swim day or something at the house. Yes, I can't wait for the minute. Pasta day for six. Or wine or a bottle or five. Depending on how the conversation goes. Exactly, exactly. Thank you so much for joining us today. This has been a really fascinating conversation. I feel like we could talk for 10 more hours.

Starting point is 00:42:31 100% we can. And we will. Thank you. We will. We will. And so thank you so much for joining us. And I look forward to watching you and hearing more of what you do on your path, because I know you're definitely on a path due to some great things.

Starting point is 00:42:46 Thank you. Thank you so much for having. You bet. Thank you. Well, thank you, everybody, for joining us today on Real Estate Real World, where we get to talk to all the cool people. Be sure to follow us on all the social channels and make sure to sign up for YouTube and all that stuff. I'm not so great.

Starting point is 00:43:03 Making sure everyone follows me and everything. But I'm thrilled to be here. And thank you guys for joining us today. Make it an amazing day, everybody. Bye-bye. Thank you for joining us today on Real Estate Real World, where we talk with masters and leaders in the real estate industry and beyond on how we can raise the bar in our industry. Please subscribe over on iTunes, and while you're there, be sure to give us a review. Your reviews encourage us and help others to find our podcast for show notes and hot topics on what's going on right now in our real estate industry.

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KGCI: Real Estate on Air - The Human Side of Real Estate - Stories of Resilience and Growth Kaelee Cornell Episode

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