KILL TONY - KILL TONY #199

Episode Date: March 8, 2017

Sal Vulcano, Theo Von, Josh Martin, Joel Jimenez, Jeremiah Watkins, Pat Regan, Tony Hinchcliffe, Brian Redban - Date: 02/27/2017 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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That's April 21st. And then two days later, we're going down to Houston for another episode of Kill Tony at the secret group and then followed by that uh Kill Tony we're doing a comedy show I'm putting together a uh really cool secret show in Houston Louis J Gomez is going to be on the show from uh Legion of Skanks fuck yeah we also have Jeremiah Watkins uh we're to have some other surprises and a secret guest. I'm going to be on the show, but we're also going to have a secret guest. And we can't tell you who the secret guest is, but duh, who else is with us in Houston? Maybe we just can't say who it is for contract reasons.

But yeah, it's going to be a golden show. Come on, get it together, guys. You know who it is. So check that out. That's at the Secret Group. So it's April 21st, Austin at the Moon Tower Festival. April 23rd, we're at the Secret Group in Houston, Texas for two shows. Also, every first Wednesday of the month, we got this secret show at the Comedy Store

in the main room. Every first and third Friday, we are at the Ice House doing the Death Squad Chronicles secret show. And then every Monday, we record what you're listening to right now. Kill Tony. And that's a free show. Every Monday

at the Comedy Store, 8 o'clock. All this can be found by going to DeathSquad.TV and clicking on Tour Dates. Also, don't forget Tony Hinchcliffe's website has all his other tour dates. He's all over the fucking place. So go to TonyHinchcliffe.com. He has his merch and everything there. Ryan J. Ebelt, the house artist.

He draws every episode and sells the prints. He also has a new Kill Tony poster that he's about to announce. Go to RyanJEbelt.com. And last but not least, don't forget shopsquad.tv. That's the official merchandise of the Death Squad universe. And all the purchases you make goes to helping me pay for everything, including the new mixer we just bought for Kill Tony.

So starting episode Kill Tony 201, we'll have a new mixer that I had to buy. The old one crapped out, as you could tell if you listened to the last episode. This episode, though, worked perfect. So, good. Just listen to this one. Don't listen to the other one. All right, guys.

Here's a brand new episode of Kill Tony. Hey, this is Ray Van Company, live from the road-famous Comedy Store Cheers! Podcasts at the Comedy Store on a Monday night in the world. Make some fucking noise. So that the thousands and thousands listening on Ustream can know that this is a real live show. Welcome, everyone. I'm so excited. Put your hands together for the great Brian Redband right here. Live in the flesh. Great Ryan J. E. Belt is drawing tonight's episode. He's right there, lit up. He's drawing right now.

He's already started. While all you lazy fucks sit there enjoying a comedy show, he's drawing tonight's episode. You're going to get to see that print at the end of the show. He also drew the official Kill Tony poster with a new one coming up soon. All those prints are available at ryanjebelt.com. And Josh Martin back there in the back escaping. Yeah, Josh Martin.

Not realizing that there's a cord mishap on stage and it almost took down the whole entire show. Producer of the show, Josh Martin. Yep. Running around, getting it done. Yep. There's a bunch of shit you always forget. It's great. It's lovely.

Real live show. Hey, look. There he is. That's him in the flesh. And he just did it. He just did what I said he was going to do. That cord, Josh. And he just took down the show.

Josh, you got to do something with that cord right there, buddy. That one. That one right there. Oh. See, whatever is connected to that. No, yeah, I totally got that. That's why I'm trying to make him focus on the trouble cord here. That one.

It's one of those shows. One of those Joker shows. So if. I see what's going on. So now if the comedian. That one. It's one of those shows. One of those Joker shows. I see what's going on. So now if the comedian... Alright. So if the comedian really fails and walks five steps back with that microphone, we know that it's going to pull

the entire board off. Yeah. This is going to be something fun to keep an eye on later on in the show. He does it again. He just did it again. He just loves doing it. What did it do? Maybe we should fix whatever that is so it doesn't happen a million times. Can we go a third time?

Live. Completely throwing us. Normally it's a whole different type of comedy show that we see for the beginning of the show. But this is almost, this is like the three stooges fucked each other and made one big down syndrome baby to produce a show.

There he is, Josh Martin. Good for Josh Martin. I love this show. I love it so much. I also love performing live stand-up comedy, which I do a lot. This show is also going to... You ready for this? We have some huge news. Huge news. Kill Tony doing Moon Tower

April 21st. We knew about that. That's not the huge news. You guys want more huge news? Then the next night in Houston, Texas. No, it's two nights later. Wait, not two nights later. Yeah, it's the 23rd. No, it's not.

That's what your people told them. Nope. The 23rd is a Monday. No, it's a Sunday. What the fuck is that? What kind of bug is that? No, it's a Sunday. What kind of bug is that?

I don't know. What the fuck is that? What the fuck is is that? No, it's a Sunday. What kind of bug is that? I don't know. What the fuck is that? What the fuck is that? That fucking... It's still alive. It's dead now. It's one of those shows. Almost had to pull out the sword on that one.

I feel like it's in my hair. Yeah, I feel like it did look like a fucking flea by the way. It did. It might have came from this mop. Ugh. Yeah, no way. Sunday's the 23rd. We're doing Kill Tony the 21st

in Austin at Moon Tower, which is a Friday night. And then on the 23rd in Houston we're going to be doing another Kill Tony at the Secret Group Comedy Club. So those tickets are available. And I got news that you don't even know about.

Where are the tickets for that? You can go to Secret Group's website. Great. And another show will be following that. We're having a Desquad Secret show with Jeremiah Watkins and some other secrets. Ooh, Secret Guests. Yeah. Ooh, I like the sound of that. I wonder who else is going to be in town for that. I don't know. It's weird. It's a show right after Kill Tony.

Just a regular stand-up show. Just a regular stand-up show. Yeah, with some secret comics. But like if I had a gig in Houston, if I was headlining in Houston a few months after that, I'd probably have a conflict where I couldn't say that I was performing on that show in Houston. Yeah, so you can't do it. But if you said that you were doing a secret show

with secret guests, it was unannounced. Secret guests, like we always do. But before we do Kill Tony right before. Right, or after. And I'm performing in a bunch of other places, too. Doing stand-up in a bunch of different cities. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Look it all up at TonyHinchcliffe.com. Colusa, Madison, Wisconsin,

Kansas City. Bunch of crazy shit. Buffalo, Moon Tower. Let's do tonight's show. Shall we make some fucking noise one more time? That's our commercial part. I love doing this show so much. Every week I have two of the funniest comedians in the world on. This week's no different.

Put your hands together for the great Theo Vaughn and Sal Volcano, ladies and gentlemen. Sal from The Impractical Jokers. Theo from his hit Netflix special. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. I love this.

Sal, Theo. Sal, this is your first time. Welcome. Thank you so much. It's such a pleasure to be here. Thank you. Appreciate that. You guys seem terrific. Thank you. I. It's such a pleasure to be here. Thank you. You guys seeming terrific. Thank you. I love coming out. Theo, you know, Sal, you've been on the show before. How's it going, my man? It's going well, man. Thank you for having me. I appreciate it. Nice to be here. Nice to see Sal. It's nice to see Theo, too. I didn't I didn't lead with that, but I told you backstage. We caught up backstage.

We won't do it now. We didn't catch up fully. We caught up pretty much. We caught up about 60-70% I feel like. Out of all the guests I've ever had on the show, this is the first time, Sal, that I've ever had a guest on that is literally on the Ondaz Hotel across the driveway right now. It is impressive.

Thank you so much. There's a 45 foot tall version of you just outside that door. Yes, it makes me feel like I told you like a huge tool. It's a nice thing. I'm happy about it. But it is fucking weird and I feel stupid. You're so humble.

If I was on the Ondas, I would just stand next to it. There's definitely insects going on. There's a lot of insects. I feel like you're doing something to us right now. Oh, I have them with me at all times. There's like these little fucking fruit flies everywhere.

Yeah, that's what they are. So fucking gross. What a terrible distraction. Guys, welcome to the show. I'm excited about this one. Sal and Theo are here. Guys, every week we have a live band that's the Kill Tony Band. And every week they do something different and topical.

They come out with a different intro. It's always a surprise to all of us what it is. It's different every week. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the great Kill Tony Band. Reagan, Watkins, Joel Jimenez, and the bass player whose name I can't remember yet. Here they come. Ooh, it's some type of electronic dance party. Something like that.

I don't even know what this is, but I like it. You guys are dancers or... Did somebody say German? Oh, this is exciting. A very German episode of Kill Tony. Big fans of Impractical Jokers over in Germany, yeah. I saw you at the Oxygen Arena in Berlin. Did you guys really do the Oxygen Arena?

I think so, yeah. I love the clips that I see of you guys just having the time of your lives at those big live shows. Yeah, it's ridiculous. Germans, is there anything else topical? Is there a reason why you guys are having the time of your lives at those big live shows. Yeah, it's ridiculous. Germans, is there anything else topical? Is there a reason why you guys are German this week? Well, Donald Trump is our

fuel. I've been hearing about the Oscars. What is Oscar the Grouch? Oscar Mayer? Oscar Weenie? Oscar Schindler? What the fuck? Wow.

None of those worked. At least we still applied the rule of threes. Alright. I'm excited about this. We have an all-German band. Sal, Theo, and a bucket filled with over 40 or 50 comedians' names. They all signed up for the opportunity to get to do 60 seconds.

If your name gets pulled out of this, a bunch of comedians are over there. Make some noise, comedians. Some people are just crazy, and they just sign up for random things. And sometimes it's a brand-new person. Sometimes it's an insane person. Sometimes it's someone that's been doing it 17 years. It's great. It sucks. Anything can happen. They get 60 seconds. Comedians or

whoever, you know your 60 seconds is up when you hear the sound of a kitty. That means wrap it up then. Of course you're going to bring out the angry West Hollywood bear. Wow. Okay. I like it. Looks like the bear has a cold or something this week. I like it, looks like the bear has a cold or something this week

I love it, you guys ready to start the fucking show or what? Oh baby Oh baby Let's do it I pulled the name out of the bucket, this looks like a new name I'm excited to see what happens In uninterrupted 60 seconds to start the show goes to Jordan Eggleston. Jordan Eggleston.

I used to be retarded when I was in high school. Sorry, I forgot you can't say that word. I was a Christian when I was in high school. Sorry, I forgot you can't say that word. I was a Christian when I was in high school. I had a friend ask me recently, I always considered myself more of like a leg man and an ass man. And he said to me, Hey Jordan, would you rather have sex with a girl that has no legs or a girl that has no head turns out i'm more of a head man i never thought about it that way think about having sex with a

girl with no head as she's been murdered by somebody probably you i uh i i got a new mistress recently and i love the word mistress because it's mysterious and romantic and just sounds better than cousin yeah and uh the the reason I love fucking my cousin is because she's a squirter and uh there's a bit of a debate on the internet about whether squirt is like piss or some other mysterious liquid usually every time red band's on rogan actually that's the debate and uh i'm just like powerade or gatorade baby oh jesus i'm gonna need some fucking electrolytes all right all right all right all right band come on sorry we're just doing our jobs here playing also comedian all right band easy with that

i like the little quick ones sometimes. Scheisse. Oh, we have a president in the house. Jordan, how long have you been doing stand-up comedy? About three years. I've been serious for a year, though. Serious for a year. What kind of life are you living where you got a new mistress?

Why so serious? I've never really seen anybody so nonchalantly segue into I got a new mistress recently what exactly does that mean to you? I just fucking love cheating on my girlfriend it's one of my favorite things to do

how long have you been with your girlfriend? you are not likable at all when do we get to start speaking? anytime you want. Okay, because I have questions. Yeah, go ahead. I'm excited about this. Anything you want.

Well, first, I got cut off, so I don't know what the squirt is. I didn't learn that. You don't know what squirting is? No, no, I know what squirting is, but you're going to tell me what it actually is, like, DNA-wise, right? like DNA wise, right? Well, the, the end of the joke that got cut off by the bear there is,

uh, uh, that it's some mysterious liquid or piss. And I'm like powerade or Gatorade. I need some electrolytes. If we're going to get this fucking party started. Okay. Got that.

Okay. Uh, I like to drink squirt. What can I say? Is that true? Do you actually drink it? Yeah. Yeah.

Swallow. Yeah. Yeah. It's piss by the way. Yeah, it's totally true. Yeah, it is. Yeah. You swallow. It's piss, by the way. Yeah, it's totally piss. I'm down with that. No, it's not. It's definitely piss.

Yep, there's not some magical liquid there. It's been piss all along. Anybody can just piss. Well, piss is a magical liquid, though. Well, then I squirt. We all squirt. Everybody squirts. It's a new children's book.

Everybody squirts. Sometimes. Okay, Jordan, why do you look like a prisoner? What's up with the chest tattoos all the way up to the knuckles? What's your story? You've been arrested before? No, I just got that American History X head shape. I look like a racist right off the bat.

How many people have you shanked this week? I need plausible deniability, so I can't get into that. Where are you from? Canada. What part? Vancouver. Vancouver. The German area.

The German area of town. Everybody squirts. Well, look, man, I'll say this. Sometimes. Sometimes. Everybody squirts. Jordan, settle down. Tony, I got to.

Yeah. Anybody can drink that, you know? I don't think that's very novel. But it takes some skill to make it happen, though. You got to know how to make it happen. But I think the real move is if you're willing to take an antidepressant and use that as. That's an adult move. Were you a practicing Christian?

Because you hooked me there, but then you abandoned it. And then I know it's hard to learn about you within a minute. But I was. First, I was going there. but then you abandoned it. And then I know it's hard to learn about you within a minute, but first I was going there, and then we abandoned it. And then you said you had multiple mistresses. That intrigued me. But then you kind of abandoned that for the punchlines. Yeah, you got to condense some shit to get it in for one minute. So you just cheat on your girlfriend with multiple mistresses?

No, I've actually never cheated. This is satire. It's your wacky character, your lovable character. Everyone wants to see you again. I'm too lovable in real life. You've actually never cheated or you just realized

that you were on a live podcast? Which one's the truth? Well, I don't have a girlfriend and I've never cheated. You have Billy Joel's honesty? You don't even have a girlfriend? No, I don't. You're a dirty liar.

You don't have a girlfriend? What is going on? I feel duped. Nobody swears. Never. No, no, no, no, no. You don't even have a girlfriend? Are you really even a bad comedian?

I'm joking. And we're off. Do you even joke, bro? You used to be one, too. Come on. That was a joke. I'm sorry used to be one, too. Come on. That was a joke. I'm sorry. That was kind of rude. I like jokes. That's what you're here for. That was great. I loved it. It's the height of this show for me.

It takes a lot of bravery to be up there, man. I felt nervous right when you were standing there and these fucking anarchists behind you. I would feel uncomfortable. But nice anarchists, but still. Do you have any tattoos that you regret? I have so many that I regret. For the podcast listeners, I can't see much, but still. Do you have any tattoos that you regret? I have so many that I regret. For the podcast listeners, I can't see much, but I could just see some coming up on the neck

and some on the hands all the way to the knuckles. Do you want to see my funniest one? Oh, I would love to see that. Did you write it? What is it, a knocking symbol? Touché. Wow, you're really walking into these i'll go i'll go funniest for funniest with you all right because i got some i got some i got some bullshit oh what's that one it's uh a unicorn with a unibrow and it says unibrow corn. Unibrow corn. That's pretty fucking bad.

Wait, is that the funniest or the worst? A bit of both. I'd say mostly the worst. That is bad. Sal, what's yours? I might bow out. Come on, Sal. Can we see yours? Give it up, Sal.

Can you match unibrow unicorn? Unibrow corn? Unibrow corn? Let's see that cock, huh? Jaden Smith! That's awesome. Jaden Smith. What the fuck?

Was that... About five or six inches of Jaden Smith's head right on the side of his head. Can I... That's a lost bet, I can tell. Yeah, it is a lost bet. Can I do something shameless right now and plug my podcast? No, you cannot.

Absolutely not. I'll listen to it. Jordan, so what else about your life? Anything else interesting that you think sets you apart from everyone? I have a podcast called The Trip Report. No, no, no. That's Jordan. It's not going to work.

Okay. Don't do that. I'll lead up to it. I went and studied shamanism for a year in South America. Ayahuasca shamanism. I really like drinking ayahuasca. I ate some magic mushrooms in the Hollywood Hills the other day. Have you ever really drank squirt before?

Yes, it's a very good soda. Yes, I have. I like it very much. Many times. I've drank it before. Your old friend has had that before. Have you not had a little bit of squirt in your mouth? Old friend?

What are you talking about? He's never had a squirter before. Squirt isn't vegan and Tony's a vegan. Okay. I'm done with you, Jordan. There he goes. Jordan Eggleston, everybody.

I love you, Jordan. It was nice to meet you. There he goes. Jordan Eggleston, everybody. He used to be. He's X. I love you, Jordan. It was nice to meet you. There he goes. Okay. Jordan Eggleston. Tony, if you really don't believe it, he's on Twitter at Jordan Eggleston, E-G-G-L-E-S-T-O-N. Brian, this is your whole thing. Don't do it on here.

This is a different podcast than what you normally do. I'm telling you an article to look up. Dr. Steve, bad medicine. Look at his article. He's on Sirius Radio. Jesus Christ. Don't have a panic attack. I could have heard you mention this on any podcast you've ever done before.

Because you talk about squirting continuously. So much so that that guy even put you into his bit. Because you continuously talk about squirting. Dude, we need some fucking brothers up in here. Where the brothers at? This could be one right here. I don't know if we've seen this guy before. Put your hands together for Ben Palmer.

Dude, that ain't a brother, dude. Ooh. Ben Palmer, everybody. Come on. Hey. Hello. I live in a one-bedroom. I've always wanted to live in a studio apartment, though, so I could feel like a rapper.

So I go out to the club at night, and I'm hanging out with cool people, you know, and then I got to leave. And they're like, where are you about to go? I'm like, shit. Back to the studio. All right, thank you. That was only 34 seconds, Ben.

You want another joke? Yeah, do more. I don't want to, Ben. What, another joke? Yeah, do more. I don't want to go over. You have 25 seconds left. 25? I went under the minute? Yeah. Fucking Christ.

Is this that guy? That is you, right? Yeah, that's me. Oh, yeah. Let's be... That's what it was, Ben. That's me. That's my name is Ben. There's the cat. There you go.

Ben Palmer, everybody. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You've been on the show a couple times. We ended up figuring out that you sound exactly like Stephen Wright.

It's a real hoot every time. What else did we find out about you? An internet troll. Oh, you love trolling people. Have you ever trolled Theo or Sal? No, I haven't. Do you guys want to get trolled sometimes? Who have you trolled?

No, I won't be mean like that. I'm not a mean troll. What is the other troll? I like to just fuck around with people. I do customer service. I could do a little bit of that. You would customer service troll me? Yeah, well, no.

If you go and tell CVS that your bag of chips is fucked up and you're pissed at them about it, I'll go on in there and be like, hey, I'm CVS. And then I'll be like, oh, fuck yourself or something. Oh, yeah. That's right. He makes the thing like he's the company,

and then responds and starts a whole thing back. Yeah. Trolling the CVS. That's my, yeah, that's part. Can you play it again? You do have a very Stephen Wright-esque voice. Can you do any voices? Like, for example, like Pat and Jeremiah.

German? Can't do Germans. We're very good Germans. I just learned how to do a Russian voice. You just go hard on the syllables and then you roll the R's. Want me to try it out? Oh, shit. Was that it?

No, that wasn't it. Give me something to say. Little green bag. Little green bag. Little green bag. I had a great... No, that's German. I got the German voice in my head. This is the worst audio tape I've ever listened to.

What is this? Ben, do you have any tattoos? No, no tattoos. What's your ethnicity? White. Pretty white. Fuck yeah, dude. Rosetta Stone?

Say again? I'm pretty white. I got some Irish, Italian, and then a mix of other stuff. I'm originally from Ohio. I lived in Atlanta the last five years. Born in Florida. I've been all over the place. Are you a little Persian? You could have a little Persian in you, bro.

Persian? Maybe. I don't know. Are you naturally... I got a Persian neck. Are you a naturally reserved person? I did the Ancestry.com thing and they were like, you have 10% Persian neck. Sorry. Say again, Sal? I spit and I did a DNA test too dot com thing and they're like you have 10% Persian neck sorry say again Sal I spit and I did a DNA test too

and I am 8% African American which was a surprise what is that how did you have that ready is that true it is true and I don't know how or why you just completely made up for your sports shoehorn episode

I also don't know how accurate that is I spit on a piece of paper and they're like, yeah, you're a percent. But I said, are you naturally reserved or is this a stage persona? No, I'm mostly reserved. But I mean, you know, I can do voices and characters. I'm kind of crazy. What's the thing that you do where you're like, whoa, you know what I mean? I never really get excited. No, I never do any of that.

There's nothing that excites you. I get excited. I don't know. It feels excited to me. But for you, it probably wouldn't. or something. The brisk walk?

Yeah. You ever sit in the front seat in an Uber? No, no. No way. I've never done that shit. No. I'll stay in the back seat.

I've never tried that. I thought about it, though. Do you do that? Yeah, I get up there sometimes. What happens when you do it? It's exciting, kind of. Oh, they're like, can you get in the back seat, please?

Some of them want to spend time with you, and some of them just have a lot of different feelings and stuff. Yeah, yeah. Did you ever try to go to the middle compartment of the front seat? That would be crazy. That would be wild. I've done it a couple times. What I like to do is I like to get in the passenger seat of the Uber,

and I just, at some point, like when they get on the freeway, I turn the passenger side airbag on and just pretend like I'm going for the wheel at the same time. It's a lot of fun. You know what me and my friends used to do in high school? What? We lived in a small town. It would be like a two-lane highway. Did you go to high school?

All right. Good one. Oh, my God. All right. It would be like a two-lane highway, right? And so you go to the minimum. You take two cars out, and then you do the minimum speed limit. You do like 46 in two lanes, and then you have a whole lot of traffic behind you.

People are just pissed off. That's very funny. Or you know what I've always wanted to do is go to a traffic circle and then get enough cars to fill the circle so no one else could join the circle. Traffic literally affects financial things. That's already had a domino effect you don't even realize how much that resonates.

That'd be cool if it made the news. Yeah like if an ambulance was trying to get to the hospital and you doing your little joke and died on the way.

Circles full. Sorry. Somebody's dying. Did you really think you were going over the minute when you finished? Did you really think you were going to go over?

I thought I was going to hear the cat. You do this all the time. You did this last time though right? You only did like 30 seconds last time. I've done it a couple times. No, no. I've heard the cat before.

Do you have like sex in 30 seconds and like roll over and be like, how'd you like that half hour I just banged you? Exactly. Exactly. I heard a cat meow during that, I believe. Right. I had the angry bear. Do you make love to a lot?

Do you have many mistresses? No. I have one special woman that I love. Do you ever troll her? I have trolled her graduation before. Really? What did you do? Well, they had a jumbotron. If you put the hashtag of the college and tweet,

they would put it on the jumbotron. And so I got our cat up there for graduation. Sorry, you want me to me like be like fuck you graduates fuck all these graduates put it there yeah that was a cat I like to do the joke back to the joke though I liked it I want to join me and I didn't know where it was gonna go and then I really enjoyed the punchline join here a troll joke sure is that okay you're very you very, you set up the thing like a magician. This will be the 30 seconds. Do you guys like cards?

Have you ever seen a deck of cards like this? Would you like to inspect the cards? Like, just say the joke, man. You can just go right into it. Can I do a premise? Can I start with a premise? Okay, can I do a punchline now? Do you like topics?

Setups? Do you like pers and necks? There you go. There you go. There you go. So I was on Facebook, and I found a farm on Facebook. And they had, like, pictures of cows. And it was called Warbington Farms. So I posted on their timeline.

I was like, do you host cow milkings? And they were like, no, only beef cows. And I'm like, well, what does that mean? And they're like, they didn't say anything, but my friend Phil commented, and he was like, that means they just kill them. And it got one like.

So I put my mouse over the link to see who liked it, and it was Warmington Farms. Got good there. That was the other 30 seconds. Thanks. For a second there, I thought you were trolling us. Just keep talking.

What is it in your childhood that makes you want to troll? I don't know. That's a good question. Anything weird happen to you in your childhood? I think I had a different childhood maybe. I was in like a strict religious upbringing. You grew up under a bridge? No, no bridge. There was no poverty.

I mean, I was in a trailer when I was a baby, but that wasn't, you know. Trailer babies are fucking pretty cool. Did you guys? I know you were, you were born and raised in a trailer. Uh, there's like a picture of me when I was a baby. I was in a trailer,

but by the time I was like, what is a picture of me at Disneyland? I didn't grow up there. No, I didn't. It was just a quick stop. It's just a quick, it wasn't,

it was, we were rolling. It was a quick roll. I was born. We lived in the magic Castle for a few years. Yeah. We always called it a mobile home. And when I was a kid, I never realized that that was also...

That was a trailer. Yeah. I was like, it was a mobile home. That was when I was little. Mainly suburbs. Yeah, real strict, you know, Jesus. I did a lot of pranking growing up. Mostly with my friends and stuff.

But we were always putting, like, the tax on the teacher's seats. That's a good one. And putting shit in my friends and stuff. We were always putting the tax on the teacher's seats and putting shit in their coffee and stuff. Mostly just teachers. We were getting expelled? Did you get expelled for that? No, I never got caught. Shit in someone's coffee? No, not shit. Dude, you went zero to 60 right there.

That's quite the prank. You came on your teacher's faces without them knowing. We raped a teacher in high school. That was hilarious. I want to say it was actually sleeping pills. What? I mean, this is like elementary school. How did you get sleeping pills?

I think from my mom. I was just like, let's make her go to sleep and then we'll have to work. That's what my thought was, I think. Have you ever spoke about this? I think it's been over seven years, right? This is the episode where you find out Brian's a serial killer and he doesn't even know it.

I mean, you're a criminal. Delete this tape. You need help, Brian. Hey, I was like fourth grade. Have you ever been described as exhilarating? This will be the first time. Is that what you're trying to say about me? No, I'm just saying.

I really want to know how you are offstage. Nah, I mean, I'm laid back. No way. What time do you go to sleep at night? 7.30 p.m. Lately, it's been about 11, 12 o'clock. Lately? Lately? Right's been about 11, 12 o'clock. Whoa. Lately? Lately?

Right after noon. I'm getting crazy. Why lately? What changed? I don't know. I'm more tired. I've lived here for like four months. I'm more tired being here.

Yeah. Okay. That's a thing? I think so. I think it is. Yeah. What do you normally do to fall asleep or while you're falling asleep? Is there something that you watch or masturbation?

Do you listen to tapes of yourself? You're getting sleepy. Very sleepy. Do you just talk yourself to sleep? That's a good idea. Like I'm tired. It's about 11 o'clock. I think we're on to three sheep.

We can make money. We can make money together. Five sheep. Six sheep. Seven sheep. Eight sheep. Alright, guys. We are just beating dead horses early on in this episode tonight.

I listen to rain. Do you guys ever do that? I love it. Listen to the sound of rain? Yeah. Oh, that's great. Ben, you're a gentleman. Well, thanks, Ben. Thanks for having me. Thank you, guys. Ben's on Twitter Thanks for having me. It's fun meeting you again. There he goes. Thank you, guys.

Thank you. Ben's on Twitter at Palmer Thinks. Have a nice night. Jordan Eggleston to Jordan Eggleston, if I didn't mention that already. If we could get this podcast to be lower energies, that would be great, everybody. I know. I know. You're listening to Super Sounds of the Six.

Thanks, Jeremiah. It totally wasn't going to happen if you didn't mention that. Put your hands together for Brian Riley, everybody. Here we go. Brian Riley. What's going on, guys? I am 41. I'm single.

I blame a lot of that on the fact that I worked at Olive Garden for an extremely long time in my adult life, though. I was able to hook up with women while I worked at Olive Garden. That wasn't the issue. I just couldn't seriously date women that fuck guy that works at Olive Garden. I have standards for myself. You just fucked a guy at Olive Garden. I can't take you home to mom. You fucked me. That's embarrassing. I guess I mentioned it. I did work at Olive Garden for a while. Funniest day at Olive Garden. There was a wedding reception at Olive Garden there was a wedding reception

at Olive Garden the bride the groom the tux the gown 43 people to celebrate this union okay I live at the beach in San Diego I've been doing drugs all my life I can't judge anybody for anything at all but that bitch settled you know what I'm talking about

there's no way that was on her bucket list she knows what I'm talking about? There's no way that was on her bucket list. She knows what I'm talking about. She's laughing. Ryan Riley. Wow. Fuck yeah. First of all, I'm completely in love with you. Never before just hearing somebody's 60 seconds,

I think I know everything about you. Pretty much picture everything. That was the goal. A lot of drugs. You've been working at Olive Garden forever. Not anymore, but yeah. San Diego. What do you do now? I'm a chemist now.

A chemist? Yeah. Wow. What do you make? Breadsticks and salad? How the fuck do you go from Olive Garden to being a chemist? How do you think that salad becomes never-ending? Yeah.

Exactly. What kind of fucking crazy, creepy, Olive Garden, Walter White bullshit are we talking about here? Where now you're just producing lettuce in a lab. What is it, Brian? How are you a chemist all of a sudden? I got a degree a long time ago in biology

and I just started using it so I could have a day job to do comedy. Did you get diagnosed with lung cancer a few months ago and your wife and kids don't know about this chemist thing? No, not at all. Sometimes you go off in a trailer in New Mexico? No. Why'd you end up on drugs, I'm wondering?

From Kansas, man. What else would you do in Kansas? And working at Olive Garden. You're fascinating. The dichotomy of, yeah, I worked at Olive Garden my whole life and now I'm a chemist is amazing to me. It's only been about a year

I've been a chemist, but yeah. All right. Well, don't sell yourself short. God bless. I'm selling myself short. I have a question. The segue that you did where you're like,

well, yeah, I guess I mentioned it, but I work at the Olive Garden. Is that a segue you do that's meant to be funny or did you just kind of stumble into that just now? I kind of stumbled into that. Because that was the funniest

fucking part for me. I know. I'm going to go back and listen to it. How long have you been doing comedy? Two and a half years. How long have you been in Los Angeles? I'm from San Diego. I'm just up here working for a couple days. What are you doing? Chemist.

What are you making? I'm making active pharmaceutical ingredients. I make drugs for a living. Active pharmaceutical ingredients. Like make drugs. I make drugs for a living. Active pharmaceutical ingredients. Like what? Creatine? He's not going to out himself. He's a drug dealer.

Is it steroids? Is that what it is? It's drugs. It's kind of scientific. I don't want to bore you to death. It doesn't sound like it at all, by the way. Now that we've had this 30 seconds, I totally would not take anything that you made. Oh, I would.

He works at the Olive Garden and he makes drugs. Sounds like the best drug ever. Oh, do you make drugs or are you a chemist for real? I'm actually a chemist for real, in a lab. Hold on, are you like a real chemist? Like a real one? Like a real guy.

Yes, actually the company is based in Bubendorf, Germany, and it sounds a lot like you. What was that conversation like when you gave you two weeks at Olive Garden? Like, yeah, listen, it's been great. I loved everyone I worked with here. This is not you, it's me, but I'm going to go become a chemist. I have a job as a chemist.

I got to leave. I had to get a job as a chemist. I want to do this full time. I need a day job. Follow-up question to Sal's question. What was that interview like when you handed over your resume to the lab? And it just said Olive Garden, 27 years. I actually started there as a glass washer for three months, and I got promoted because I knew it.

Of course you did. You're right. What are you talking about, Brian? and I got promoted because I knew it. Of course you did. You're white. What are you talking about, Brian? But I told them that I knew how to wash dishes because I've washed dishes for 20 years in restaurants. And they're like, okay, that makes sense. You're hired. You're like, let me shoot you straight chemistry, people.

When I'm here, you're family. That's an olive garden. Not you, but everybody else would be. I shoehorned it in. He tried. He tried. I shoehorned it in. I once had an Olive Garden joke.

I said I went there. They told me it was an hour wait. And I said, is that how you treat family? Thank you. That's right. That was good. That was good. That joke needs to take the tour of Italy.

Oh. I like that. That joke got him on TV. I have an Olive Garden song on Spotify. My friend Bone Cage made it off my lyrics. So check it out. It's called Olive Garden Butthole. I'll get on that. It really is. It's on Spotify. My friend Bone Cage made it off my lyrics. So check it out. It's called Olive Garden Butthole. I'll get on that. It really is. It's a big hit

in Germany. Olive Garden Butthole. It actually is. I know. Do you believe in Olive Garden? Do you believe that they have good food? Do you believe in the practices? Oh, fuck no. There's good stuff. You didn't get a little bit hooked there? There's not some things that you go back for? Afraid of dipping sauce in the breadsticks?

What's the most disgusting thing? No woman should ever fuck a guy that takes them to Olive Garden. Okay? Like I just... PSA. Okay. I was killed. So you say that...

You shouldn't. You should never. Have you taken a woman to Olive Garden? Everyone in this audience has done that. I've been there and I won't shit on it. I mean, I get what people do, but I've had a good meal there. I brought my grandma there once. She wanted to go.

So much Olive Garden talk. Enough with this bread schnick. Bread schnick? I was excited about that. Do you have a Steels or Crayons app? Brian, you say that you're single. How long have you been single for? About six years.

You've been dating? You on any of the dating sites? Yeah, yeah. I was a bartender while I waited tables during the day, bartended at night. Where'd you bartend at? Down in Vista, North County, San Diego. Another Olive Garden lady. It was not an Olive Garden lady. It was a lady with an attitude.

The Vista Olive Garden? You waited tables in the day at an Olive Garden, no. It's a lady with an ad. It's a fucking Olive Garden. Are you listening? The Vista Olive Garden. You waited tables in the day at one Olive Garden bartender at the other at night. It's fucking... It's true, it's fun. But like I said, I had to get a day job to be able to try comedy. In the last six years, have you felt at all like you might have found love at any time, but it didn't work out?

Yeah, a couple times. I lived in Galveston Texas for a while oh then that's shaking her head like you know yeah you don't want to marry anybody woman that lives in Galveston Texas oh my god what about someone that works at the Olive Garden in Galveston just fucking murder there's no Olive Garden in Galveston it's kind of it's a classy island you're very

picky Brian you should I am I ain't gonna lie you could he's a chemist I'm 41 what are you going to do is that true do you have a big dick? How does Jeremiah know that? Did you say that at some point? I can see it from the back. We made eye contact.

You can see it in his back? Sorry, I tucked it to you. My bad, my bad. He's got a little tail back there? That's what I thought. I thought it was an extended vertebrae. Nope, that's on dick. It's like a real lab.

Or it's a poo. Is that the breadstick in your pocket or are you just having to see us? It's the best German I could do. I'm sorry. I like it, man. I think it's great. I think it's like the American dream. You can go from working at an Olive Garden to being a chemist somewhere.

Living at the beach. It's fun, yeah. Yeah, to being a freelance chemist, dude. That's fucking great, dude. I'm a chemist. dude. That's fucking great, dude. I'm a chemist. Oh, that's awesome. See how that works? What made you pick San Diego?

Just because it's nice? I was living at a beach in Texas, and I just kind of wanted to upgrade beaches. Were you there when Robert Durst put the body out in the water? No. That was before me. Yeah. Okay. I was there during Hurricane Ike, all that fun shit.

Hurricane Ike? Yeah. That sounds delicious. Was Hurricane Mike right near there? No, not at all. You do a lot of canes? You cane hop? You go to a lot of hurricanes?

He hit Tina Turner pretty hard. I've been through it before. Yeah. Lived in Florida for a while. My cousin's a fucking cane hopper, dude. They're fun. They're fun. Until it really hits.

Like a Category 1, a Category 2 hurricane is kind of fun to party through. Category 3 and up, you want to get the fuck out of town. He knows what I'm talking about. Don't ever put anyone in a Category 3 hurricane. You don't. Category 2, you can still stay there. You won't drown. You can party. Lights will go out for

a day or two. You'll get drunk. Work will happen another week. You'll be back to work. The big move is category four, get your dick out. Let Mother Nature give you that blowjob, bro. Oh, see, I left town. I got the fuck out of town for that. Stay and play, baby boy.

You stay. You stay. See, I learned my lesson. Thank you for being on the show, then. Thank you. What's the craziest hookup you ever had, Brian? I know these restaurant people. Nights get crazy with those restaurants.

The craziest? Okay, like two months ago, I hooked up. Wow. Nights get crazy. Two months ago, I hooked up with the hottest chick I ever hooked up with walking to the store to get cigarettes on a Friday night in Ocean Beach, San Diego. While you were walking?

It was fucking... You just kept walking while fucking? No, I took her back to my place but a block and a half to get cigarettes. Did you make this lady in the lab that you were at? No, they won't talk to me there. They're too smart. Was her vagina circumcised?

No. It was shaved, though. It was beautiful. Are we going to go down this road? We can go down this road. I don't know if you have to move on, but I can't let this go. What did you say? Who said something first? then what was said next? And then just take me through how that led to you fucking at your house on the walk for cigarettes.

Because I think we all want to know, don't we? Absolutely. Can I take a guess before you go? I take you as the kind of guy, you're walking to get a pack of cigarettes, I picture you whistling. Am I right? Whistling, everybody hurts And she's just like Hey what song is that You're just like what song do you want it to be

I work in a motherfucking lab Something like that Okay how did it go I went to the store to get cigarettes There was a bar in between She was going to the bar I started talking to her She kept talking I went to get. She was going to the bar. I started talking to her. She kept talking.

I went to get cigarettes. We went back to the bar. You're yada, yada, yada-ing this. Yeah, exactly. Don't say we started talking. We were at the bar. We were sitting there talking. She looked at me, and she's like,

will you go down on me? I said yes. She's like, let's go to your home. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Stop, Brian. Stop doing this fucking thing that you're doing. Listen, we're going to go piece by fucking piece. I left the house.

Shh. Stop. Just start answering my questions. You ready? Yes. Here we go. The first time you saw the girl, was it when you were both walking the same direction? Yes.

Okay. But you didn't say anything at that point, right? I love this music. Keep this going. Yeah, I started talking to her right away, yeah. So you started talking to her while you were walking down the same sidewalk? Yeah. Side by side. You're like, hey, what are you up to? She's like, I'm talking to her right away, yeah. So you started talking to her while you were walking down the same sidewalk? Yeah. Side by side.

You're like, hey, what are you up to? She's like, I'm going to the bar. You're like, I'm going to get a pack of cigarettes, but I guess I'm going to the bar now. Yeah, we started talking. We went and got cigarettes. But what were the exact words? I don't remember the exact words. I was drinking all day.

I live at the beach, man. You have to remember me. Look at me. Look at me. We want to believe you. Please, tell us details. Just paint a picture for us. Call out my name.

You can do anything right now. I told you exactly what happened. This is like Drew Carey if he got hit in the head with an aluminum bat, by the way. Load of wisdom. Whose line is it anyway? We went to get cigarettes. We went to the bar. Just make up a fucking story. We get cigarettes. We went to the bar.

We started drinking. Show us one fucking detail. Show us your fucking details. I gave you details. I told her to stick them. I told her she had to shave pussy. What more do you want? What more do you want? I told her what she said to me.

I told her she had to shave pussy. What more details do you want? What? We want some details. Just one thing. Do you remember anything about it? You were that drunk. You don't remember anything?

What she said? What you said? How fast you came? Anything crazy happen? Oh, it took me a while. I was drunk. How long before you put your sample in her beaker? About 20 minutes after being home.

No, we sat there. She used to live in Ocean Beach. She was down there hanging out with friends. I happened to live right down there by the bar. Like, let's just hang out. Let's party. All of a sudden, you're answering these questions like we're detectives, and you're being interrogated right now.

Well, I got like five of y'all jumping on my shit. It seems like you killed this girl at the end of everything. What do you want to know? I was drunk. I don't remember. I don't know what time it happened. Yeah, this is the worst interrogation. It's like the first 400. Seriously, bro? Seriously, bro?

Meow. Meow. I just meowed him. I love it. Brian Riley. You're going to be fine. You're not your father, dude. And you're going to be fine. Oh, thank God. Thank. You're not your father, dude, and you're going to be fine. Oh, thank God.

Thank God I'm not my father. Yeah. You're cool as fuck, man. I love that you're chasing your dreams and that you're a funny guy. 42? 41. 41. Well, I had you picked for 42.

Oh, thank you, man. I'm older than him. You're living the life. You just walk on the streets fucking people. It's a good life, man. I'm not complaining. You're like a cool rapist. You're just walking the streets fucking people. It's a good life, man. I'm not complaining. You're like a cool rapist. You're just a chemist. Just a chemist, money in your own business, big swinging dick, going to get some fucking tobacco.

Just fucking people just living your life, man. Don't hate it, man. If you dye your skin, you could be a rapper, bro. You got it. I'll buy no Snoop right here. There you go. Brian, I absolutely love you. It was nice to meet you. There got it. I'll buy no Snoop right here. There you go. Brian, I absolutely love you. It was nice to meet you. Brian Reilly, ladies and gentlemen.

He's on Twitter at BrianReillyComic. How great. Two and a half years into the game. This guy's making all of his dreams come true. How long were you working at Olive Garden for? Last question, Brian. One year. Five years. That's it? Five years? No, that sort of sucks.

You know what we're going to do right now? We have one regular. Guys, we have one human being that doesn't even get pulled out of the bucket. This young lady does a brand new 60 seconds every single week for a while now. She's the one regular. She's one of them now. Angela Merkel. And then we're going

back to the bucket after that. For the rest of the show. But here she is. Ladies and gentlemen. The great Allie Makovsky everybody. Kill Tony regular. Hell yeah. I'm half Jewish.

Thank you. I'm half Jewish. My you. I'm half Jewish. My dad's the Jew in the family. So all my life, people would always tell me that I'm not really Jewish because it's like this whole thing, you know. People always say, oh, your dad's Jewish, you're not Jewish. My whole life I've been told I'm not Jewish. And then I went to this rally, and a bunch of white supremacists were there.

And they kept saying, kike, kike. And I was like, really? Thank you so much. I was like, it's okay, though. My dad's the Jew. And then they just kept saying kike. It was great. I was like, I went to this protest

against white supremacists and I finally got the validation that I wanted this is why I stick to talking about my pussy because I didn't go to college I think you actually I think you actually are, I think you have something great there. I just think it needs a little bit of proper

setup. Sure, yeah. I kind of dragged it out. I think you just need to tell the truth because you were in New York at those anti-Trump rallies, right? Yeah, I mean it wasn't originally like anti-Trump or anything but it kind of became that. Fuck Donald Trump. Okay.

Wow, Jesus Christ, man. Fuck him in his face. I hope he gets assassinated. Oh my god. Wow, there's just no filter at all over there tonight, huh? We can't do anything right. Our military has to be strengthened. Okay, okay, okay.

That cannot become a thing. That can't be a thing. Kike! Sorry, I got caught up. I'm now looking at an entire Trump soundboard, and it is the worst thing I've ever wanted to see on this show. Nothing gets a party started like a Trump soundboard. There are actually some really, really funny ones in there.

I'm really rich. I will build a great, great wall. I love this. We need to build a wall. All right. So, Allie, that's true. You went to New York City. You went to the rally.

And were they really just yelling kike over and over again? Yeah. Who was walking by? What kind of super Jew was walking by? The thing was, I was there, and they kept saying kike stuff, and I was like, I don't think I look that Jewish. But I was also so flattered. You want to be Jewish?

No, it's not that. It's just that people always say that I'm not. And so then finally I was like, you know. How do you look Jewish? You look like my dad, maybe. You could pass for German. What? You could pass for German. Did somebody say German?

Yeah, Sal said it just a second ago. It's interesting. I think you also need to set up, because I don't know if everybody knows about the dad. You, you almost said it. Like, they say, you know, I can't remember how you said it. Maybe I should have explained it more.

Yeah, because you sort of covered it twice, but you didn't really say it. You didn't say, they say that you're not Jewish if only your dad's Jewish. You said my dad's Jewish, but my mom's not. So, you know, sort of not clear. Sure. For the, you know, the layman folk. Like, I understand it completely, but these peasants out here, I mean, they have no idea what you're talking about. sort of not clear for the layman folk. I understand it completely, but these peasants out here, they have no idea what you're talking about.

I have a ton of... I have a ton of Jewish friends. Oh my god. That is the worst. But yet I sort of want to... So probably also... Okay.

Alright, Allie. I mean, what else is going on in the world? You come back every single week. She writes and performs a new 60 seconds every single week. She was in that video with the... Shia LaBeouf. Remember the Shia LaBeouf? Yeah, with the guy shouting and he was like...

Remember the girl that looks like she's hypnotized with her hand up? Yeah, that's her. He will not divide us. Oh, yeah, when the guy shouted and he was like, ah. Remember the girl that looks like she's hypnotized with her hand up like, he will not divide us. Oh, yeah. It was a cat. Oh, wow. You'll never live it down. Oh, boy. How did you know that that was Good Morning America's camera that you were looking right into? You live and you learn.

No, I don't. I always make the same mistakes. Well, I love it. You're dressed like you're about to go film Home Alone 3 with an all-female cast. You look like you're one of the new wet bandits. I'm so comfortable.

I'm a sticky bandit, don't you? You're Marv's daughter. Home Alone 5. That's a great idea. That is. Have you seen Family Man? I love Family Man. Of his Nicolas Cage great idea. That is. Let's get that made. That's a great idea. Have you seen Family Man? I love Family Man. Of his Nicolas Cage great film.

It's good, isn't it? Yeah, very nice. We got a house in Jersey at the end. House in Jersey. I love it. She's ShamWow. I love it, dude. You don't like it?

You've seen it. No, I'm too young. That's my excuse for everything. How old are you? Have you seen some best of men? I'm 21. Oh, you are? Oh, you really are. I hope you grow up and watch it.

Okay. 21. Do you Snapchat a lot? I do. I'm always on Snapchat. What's your favorite filter? I like to use multiple filters. It depends.

If I'm wearing a lot of makeup, I just like to use the brighter one, so it really highlights my face. But if I'm wearing a lot of makeup, I just like to use the brighter one so it really highlights my face, but if I'm looking rough, black and white. Have you been asked that 100 times? You had such a prepared answer for that. Yeah, I'm like the fucking queen

of Snapchat. Wow, that's a bold statement. And she has a pay Snapchat that you can pay to see some sexy nipples. Yeah, I don't do that. But if I get really desperate. The queen of Snapchat. You know what they say,

Jews run all of social media. Half Jews. There you go. HJs, huh? Boom. All right, the great Allie Makovsky doing another brand new minute. There she goes. We love her.

The sweet little Kill Tony Frankenstein every single week. She's on Twitter at Allie Makovsky. Right, Allie Makovsky? It's Allie Makovsky. She had to change it. Somebody bumped her off of her own name. White supremacist hack show. Oh, white supremacist hack show.

You bring that up now? You're in the shadows. I want to talk to you for a half hour about that. Yeah, what the fuck? They divided you. I was just going to say, it seems as though he did divide us. Ooh, I always love it when the name is written in Sharpie instead of pen Put your hands together for Will Leach

Here he comes with Will Leach I think what we need now more than ever is some honesty Will Leach. Hi there. I think what we need now more than ever is some honesty. I wish on the flight I was in on yesterday, the airline would have been a little more truthful and said, keep your seatbelt on at all times. There's no way that thin fabric will prevent your death in the event of a crash, but it would be a big help to us if we could match your carcass to the passenger manifesto. It would be much easier if you were roughly where we started you. Floor lighting will illuminate the cabin so the rescue workers

can find your charred remains that they will remove through six exits, two in the front, two in the mid, two in the rear, likely by way of a slide, gentlemen. If my honesty plays forward, next time you're put on hold by your cell phone company, maybe the message will be something like, you know, we're not experiencing higher than average call volumes. We're largely understaffed, completely disinterested, currently watching cat videos. Then we'll watch porn. During peak periods to save time, cat porn.

Thank you for your time. Honesty, I love you, Tony. Not sure about that jacket. Thank you so much time. Honesty, I love you, Tony. Not sure about that jacket. Thank you so much, Will Leach. I fucking love you. I don't know who he... You don't know about my jacket? Will, I love you.

I love your style. How many years did you work at Olive Garden? I love that cat shirt also. Let me see it. Let me see it. Let's see it. If it was going worse than it was, I was going to do this to gain some sympathy. It's a cat playing a banjo. Yes.

Oh, like Deliverance. I'm sorry. Whose jacket did you criticize? Exactly. Valid point. Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow. Okay. Will, let's get into it.

That is the lightest jacket, too, I've ever seen. I'm going to say that. Is that definitely a jacket? I think he looks like he works at the van store. It's a white, unmarked van store. That is my boy, Patty Reagan. I don't even want you guys to laugh. That's my boy, Patty Reagan.

He doesn't want us to laugh. I love how you're so cool. He's such a rock star. How come you don't say that after all the things that didn't get a laugh? The only time Tony's made me laugh offstage is when he says we should hang out more.

Did you just turn into Triumph the insult comic doc? The only day in the dune he... Can I get the horse of truth. Will. Okay. Stick with me here, Will. How long have you been doing stand-up?

60 seconds. That's your first time on stage. Come on. Put your hands together for Will. There you go. That's what I love. That's amazing. I love that.

What made you want to start doing stand-up? Loved it my whole life. 20 years ago, saw a little open mic in Vancouver. Underage, underweight Seth Rogen was one of the guys doing it. Wow. I said to my girlfriend, now my wife, and said, one day I want to do that. We're coming to L.A. She goes, you should do this.

How are you so comfortable? How are you so comfortable on stage? When she said one day I wanted to do that, she was talking about having sex with Joe Rogan. So anyways, you seem so comfortable on stage. You have to have been on stage before. Have you done public speaking? I'm an insurance broker.

Oh, okay. And I do sales training for insurance guys. There you go. Do you also insult people when you're done with that? I typically do it while I'm doing that. The insurance is broken. Why don't you fix it? Fucking Germans, dude.

That's my boy, Patrick. Oh, my God. So how much material have you written? Have you written like five minutes? Have you written three? Is that it? I would have written probably about three, cut it down to one for this, but this is literally the

impetus to give it a shot. It was an amazing bit. I think you would have gotten 800% more laughs if you would have slowed down 30%. You almost seemed too normal and you almost seemed too comfortable if that makes sense, instead of somebody sort of performing.

Totally makes sense, yeah. You could have used 10% of boring Ben Palmer earlier, you know what I mean? Just slowed it down a little bit. Cool. But I loved it. I guess what I'm saying is the tone of that morbid yet completely accurate airplane bit is a little bit more evil than your, you know, it's another way. Your charred body is getting pulled out of the six exits.

You know what I mean? Sure. Yeah. Awesome. Does that come from as you do insurance? Does that come kind of from that vibe, that vein of thought? Yeah. I mean, it's typically not a great topic talking about how you might drop the next day

and should buy something to take care of your family. So a little levity in the situation I think helps that out. Yeah. You seem polished. Yeah. And how long have you been a stepdad? Next question.

Yes, of course. We might have hit a nerve. Aren't we all curious how long he's been a stepdad, though? How long have you been the evil stepdad? Do you have kids, Will? I do not. You don't? What's your favorite category of porn?

He doesn't consider his stepkids kids. People. What's your favorite category of porn? None. You don't watch porn? Good call, man. Smart answer. You don't ever watch porn?

No, smart answer. We get it. Your sex life just was banging, right? Making love. Absolutely. Next question. Next question. He's flying through these questions like Trump at a CNN festival. You're like Michael Dukakis. That's an old reference, but

he doesn't recall. Fuck Michael Dukakis. I hope he gets assassinated. I used to lift weights with David Duke, dude. What? I did. I swear to God, we shared a, dude. What? I did. Swear to God, we shared a back fence when I was growing up. Really?

Yeah, we used to go do chest a lot. You talk about that in your stand-up? Uh-uh. You are the funniest person I've ever met in my fucking life. Isn't that when I say, and you think I have a bad hoodie? You really lifted weights with David Duke? Dude, he's a nice guy. I mean, overall, I didn't get into many of his practices.

Did your muscles burn like a cross afterwards? What do you mean, oh? That's just funny. That's your reality and you have not spoke about that on stage? Are you kidding me? God damn, you have some stuff to dig into. I mean, I'm not going to judge him but at the time he was

non-practicing non-practicing. Soft lips. Yeah and he just seemed pretty casual and liked to hit the gym. I liked to hit the gym. He was dating this pretty girl that worked at this seafood restaurant while I was working. Oh yeah. Her name was Daisy. How does Jeff Garcia fucking play y'all's band?

That's what I wanted to know. I regret all of this. All right, I'm sitting down. But anyway, man, I applaud you. You wanted to do this, and you came in. Joel Jimenez comes out from behind the drums to do one joke, waits a few seconds, but doesn't quite wait just long enough. I know what I did, Tony.

I love it. I'm just letting the podcast listeners know what that was. What don't you like about his jacket? Whose jacket were you making fun of? Mine. You said, I love you, Tony, but I don't know about that jacket. But when you said that jacket, we noticed that you actually were looking at Sal.

Because it seems like you have a queer eye for a straight guy. Oh, my God, Brian. Did you do something different tonight? Not smoke pot? You didn't smoke pot. I'm not wearing my hat. Is that what it is? Is it me?

Because this is like earth tones. My plan was to finish with, I was going to say, but going in the theme of honesty, but you jumped the queue earlier. I was going to say, if you could let my wife know that was about 13 minutes, it would be awesome. But you did the exact same joke about 20 minutes ago. So I just made fun of your jacket, pretty much is what happened there. Yeah.

I don't mind a good ribbing. I love that, too. But the thing is, I don't think that... It's a great jacket. Yeah, that's why it didn't really play. Just a shot. If it was like a bad jacket, it would have probably played. It's called...

I just want to say, Will, that I absolutely... Sorry, Brian. I know you're in here still. What's going on over there? Brian and I got in an argument. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Now we're good. Welcome to the Mixed Feelings podcast. It really is. There's like seven different things going on at once up here right now. I sort of love it. Sorry. Okay, we got it. We got it. We got it. Okay, hit another Trump button. I'm sorry. There you go. Okay, can we get out of that

for a little bit? Will, tell us something else interesting about you. Do you have any hobbies or anything that you do that sets you apart? Any chemist work? Anything crazy? You skydive out of boats? Grew up as a kid. You fucking people in the streets?

Grew up as a kid playing tennis with Matthew Perry. Oh, Matthew Perry. Yeah. Young Matthew Perry. You grew up with Matthew Perry? Playing tennis. Soft lips. One could say that you guys were friends? We were.

I hate this crowd. I don't know what's going on tonight. I'm throwing... How long have you been an earthworm? One might say that you guys were studios on a sunset trip. I don't know. That was for Tony. That was a show he did after it kind of went away.

If you saw it, it was a hoot, that joke. Go on, Sal. Will your wife be proud of you that you got up here and did this? Oh. See? Good for job, Tony. See?

Good for you, man. See, Tony? Scratchers do exist. Sal wants to know if maybe your wife wants to come up, take a bow. No? No. I think we're good.

I think we're good. Man, you've got quite the ego ever since Fuller House came out. Can I tell you that? We thought you were out. Please sign up again, though, man. If that was your first one, I would love to see your second and third. I was going to give you actually some minutes at the Ice House for the show this week,

but unless you want to do three minutes. Want to do three minutes at the Ice House this weekend? I'll take you up. Boom! Three-minute guest spot. Will Leach. First time ever doing stand-up and he just booked another gig.

Chase your dreams, motherfuckers. How old are you, Will? 48 years old. Will Leach doing stand-up for the first time. He's wanted to do it for 20 years and he just did it in front of you. One of the most quiet, mellow audiences

we've ever had at this podcast. Episode 200. Hey, Sal needs a drink, Josh. If Sal can get a drink, what would you like? The same thing as before. Okay, the same thing as before as Zima? I love these wild impractical Joker's fans that know

everything about you. It's Jameson Neat, you idiot! By the way, they're bringing back Zima. I don't know if you guys remember Zima. They're bringing it back for a limited time. Oh, wow. And they're bringing back spousal abuse, too. To wash it down with. Do I remember it? Sal will have a

rum and squirt if you have it. Do I remember it? In 94, I fingered my first Zima. I actually liked Zima. I still drank it until the end. Do you guys remember Surge? I was a Squirt fan. I always drank Surge when I got UTIs.

What? Why? That makes it worse. Just let it impact. All right. I pulled another name out of the bucket. Put your hands together for Joy Eileen. Oh, wow, from the front row, here she comes. This is exciting.

This could be another first timer here. Joy Eileen, everybody. Hi. Hi. So I found this new website that I can keep track of my ex-boyfriends. It's amazing. It's called Mugshots.com. Anybody heard of it?

Yeah. I didn't hear about it, but I actually Googled the guy I lost my virginity to, and there he was. He was arrested for lewd acts with a cow. It's nice to know he still thinks about me. Don't worry. I don't do this for a living. I'm actually a massage therapist.

But I'm a really bad one because I don't give happy endings. Not that I have morals or anything. It's just workers comp doesn't cover tennis elbow. Found that out from a priest. In fact, that's how you know you can trust a priest. The ones with the tennis elbow, if they have that band that keeps the tennis elbow better, it's like a chastity belt. You're like, oh, I can trust you with my kid. Joy Eileen. Fuck yeah.

You've been on this show before. Yeah. What did we find out about you there? Anything else that you didn't cover already? No. I'm a massage therapist, romance author. So your dude really fucked a cow? No, it was a massage therapist. Romance author. So your dude really fucked a cow? No, it was a DUI.

Jesus Christ. It's a jokey poo, Brian. You never know. I know a lot of people in Ohio that have played with goats. No, you don't. You don't know anybody that's actually played with a goat. Yes, I do. Joy. Yes. How long have you been a massage therapist for? Ten years. How long have you been in stand-up comedy for? A year. How long have you been a massage therapist for?

Ten years. How long have you been in stand-up comedy for? A year. How long have you owned those Uggs? A year. Wow. Those are something else. So I feel like you might be a mishmash of a lot of the people that have been on earlier.

Let me guess here. You were born and raised in a mobile home. You worked at Olive Garden for a while. And then you worked your way up to what you are right now. None of those. What part of the valley are you from? Madera, Fresno. Nailed it.

Vine country. How long have you been down here? Do you still live up there? No, I've been here, what, 13 years? Yeah, 13, 14 years. Who are you referring to? Who's American Hodor? This fucking guy looks like he just

squeezes people's heads to death. That's your favorite method of killing, right? Just the old fucking... Oh, you son of a bitch. I see what you're doing. Now I feel like I can't really make fun of you, Joy. This guy's arms could reach me from there.

How long have you two been together? How long have you two been together? How long have you two been together? 13 years. Wow, congratulations. So you met him on your first massage? Yeah. He's my first happy ending. Yeah, exactly.

Oh, wow. Does he wait outside the door while you're giving massages to make sure no funny business happens? No, actually, he's the one that gives the happy endings after I'm done. Takes that, you gay boy. Gay boy.

Nailed it. What does he do for work? What kind of truck does he drive for a living? He works for the Navy. Old Navy. Whoa. Old Navy? Yeah. So dumb.

What does he do for the Navy? I'm a government contractor. Yeah. Ooh, a government contractor. What does that mean? We'll just say I work on a test program. Whoa. Wow. What does that mean?

In the Navy. I'm so mad. This is one of his test projects right here walking out. He's like, I'm out of here. Wow, that's very ambiguous and cryptic. Yeah. Which I'll test him, bro. Yeah. Area 52. Yeah. Which I'll test them, bro. Yeah.

Area 52. HIV. Because I grew up in a test. I grew up, they had a primate center by me and they used to test the polio vaccine. Wait, what the fuck? We shared a test. You mean to tell me they could look out a window and see David Duke lifting weights from this test? You did the other one in the twilight zone.

Swear to God, Dave. They tested the polio vaccine in our town. They almost cured polio by us. They almost cured it? What happened to the people instead? One of the vaccines they came out with ended up giving a lot of people cancer, but they still gave it to millions

of women. Man, that had about as many happy endings as Joy's given out. You need to do a Dos Equis commercial because, seriously, he's the world's most interesting man. I was going to tell you something else. I forgot it.

I like that you did the self-deprecating thing. I thought that was a really funny joke. Thank you. I don't know. The happy ending stuff for me was it's a little bit common. You think massage, you the happy ending stuff for me it's a little bit like common you think massage, you think happy ending I would love to have heard

in 13 years of massage I'm sure you actually have some real stories that might be really genuinely crazy and funny like prostate massage and how common it actually really is well I mean you have your appointment next week, so. I know.

Boom. Yeah. Take that, gay boy. I like her because she has very big thumbs. Yeah. And I know how to use them. Now, do men sometimes approach you with extra money to provide stuff? And I know your husband's here, and I'm not trying to be crass.

I'm just asking that. No, no, no. Thanks, honey. No, yeah, they do. Yeah. Yeah. Does it make you feel sad for the men, or does it make you feel like some of them are just – it's just they think it's part of what goes on in a massage, or is it kind of –

No, it's sad, especially like when they leave and they make an appointment for their wife and their 13 year old daughter to come in and see me later i'm like dude oh there's some dark humor in that i think see i'm being serious see because i want to know i know it's hard to again in a minute yeah but i i'd love to know about you you know what i mean instead of just like you know these like quick um just kind of like just throw away punch lines right i mean it's interesting enough that you're a masseuse for 13 years i'd love to find out more about you when you do it can i have a question with massages because i was trained to like always take off your underwear and then just put the towel over you and then some places have like underwear laying there i'm like i'm not gonna

wear this fucking underwear fuck you but so i'm always naked so. Is it normal for you to be naked? That's normal, right? I work at a chiropractor so it's more of physical therapy. So yeah, if they need the glutes worked on, yeah. It doesn't bother me. I've seen it all. It's kind of sad. So all that set up to that original question

of what should you actually wear into a massage place? You had to have us all picture you with a towel on. And I usually always lay there and I tuck my dick so she can see it from behind just in case if anything happens, she can touch the tip of it at least. That's very thoughtful. Why have it up under your belly? That's unuseful. Did you have like a Red Bull before the show or something?

Red Bull and Tito's, right? Is that what you always drink? That's my first drink of the night or second. But did you – what? Something's off tonight. How many taquitos did you eat before this? Taquitos? That's my first drink of the night. Or second. But did you... What? Something's off tonight. How many taquitos do you eat before this? Taquitos. That's a great question.

I like your point of view, though. I think it seemed kind of like from a blue-collar lady, and I really like the point of view. And I am even going to give you the exact same note that I just gave Will Leach, which is, you know, slow it down. Add a little bit of rock star element to your thing. Maybe laugh at your own jokes a little bit less. It's cool to do that. You don't have to though.

You know what I mean? I feel like you're a year in and you can cut those bad habits out by being self-aware right from the beginning. Because then you just don't think you need it. Well, last time I bombed super, super bad. So you figured that if you laughed, at least one person would be laughing. Exactly. Because he won't. So that guy.

I don't know. I don't know. Yeah. It's been, what, 13 years. He's not laughing anymore. I'm laughing now. So, all right. What if everyone just started laughing in here

and then credits rolled? Chill out, Bernie Sanders, dude. Jesus Christ. There you go. Joy, do you have any special skills or talents or anything like that? Just the romance author. Oh, yeah, romance author.

How's that been going? It's good. I'm going to publish next month, so I'm kind of excited. My fifth book, so that's exciting. What? See, talk about that. That's crazy. That's amazing.

It's self-publishing. It's not that amazing. Still, you wrote five books. It's crazy. Well, six, but... How happy are you, sir, that you don't know how to read? You gave a thumbs up on that one. That's good. Joy, it was nice to see you again.

Thank you. Fun stuff. Totally slow it down and get into that real shit. Joy Eileen's on Twitter. Hey, it's me, Joy. That's my mom's name. I can't believe you got that Twitter handle. Where's Sal's drink?

Yeah, Jameis. Josh. Josh. Yo, I need that drink, man. He couldn't get it because there wasn't a cord for him to trip over on the way to the bar. There always needs to be a blunder. His fruit fly book bag or whatever.

Yeah, this bug situation is just... I think I swallowed a couple. This is like a haunted episode. Oh, this bug situation is just... I think I swallowed a couple. This is like a haunted episode. Oh, this looks like a fake name. Every once in a while, a terrible comedian thinks it's funny to just write a fake name on one of the pieces of paper

and then they drop it in the bucket because they're comedians and some of them are too afraid to actually do the 60 seconds, but they want to have some effect on the show. One of the few ways to do it is just by signing up on a piece of paper. There's almost no way this is going to be a real human being, but I'm going to say the name anyway.

Put your hands together for Dick Hertz. There you go. Perfect. So stupid, you fucking idiots. But see what ends up happening is I win at the end of that. I get that laugh by acknowledging it like that. So you end up just giving me more power. Even though you wanted to hate, you're giving me more power.

My favorite thing is Josh cuts them all and reads them all to make sure there's no duplicates and stuff. And he was like, oh, Dick Hurts is nice. I'm very excited about this. Oh, Dick Hurts totally sounds like somebody that I would not get to drink for. All right. I pulled another name out of the bucket. This actually seems real, and they seem very interesting.

It seems like it could be multiple people. Put your hands together for the Chroma Keys. It's a single human. Oh, wow. Hey, how's it going? I'm Zane. That's Chris. Usually on the bass back there. For the Chroma Keys.

Chris, what are you thinking? Not going to bed? Make some noise for the Chroma Keys, ladies. Here's a song I wrote when I was 14. Saw you earlier. I got a babysitter. Good luck. She made me fucking dinner.

It sucked. I got some Dr. Peppers. A Red Bull too. I got some Dr. Peppers, a Red Bull 2. I got a lot of cool shit to do. I'm not going to bed. I'm never going to bed. I'm not going to lay down my head because I'm never fucking going to bed. I got GTA on PS2

I got Cinemax and Mountain Dew I got AOL chat, Gravedigger 69 It's way past my bedtime Alright, I'm not going to bed Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, never going to bed I, I, I, I, I Heard what I fucking said You hate this

I sleep when I'm fucking dead Thank you Fuck yeah The Chroma Keys I love this How long have you two been playing together? About five years Five-ish, yeah

Yeah, five years Five years That one's I'm Never Going to Bed How many songs do you guys have? playing together? About five years. Five-ish, yeah. Yeah. Five years? Five years. That one's I'm never going to bed. How many songs do you guys have? Like an hour or something. Wow. We just tried to squeeze one in in a minute. Yeah, we shortened that one down.

Yeah. I immediately loved it. Oh, thank you. I was completely into it. Appreciate it. Yeah, yeah. I didn't know that you could do that. I didn't know it was supposed to be funny at first. But then I, I mean, it was like humorous and stuff, but I legitimately liked it as a song. Oh, thanks, man. I was completely into it. Thank you very much. I appreciate it. What's your name?

I'm Zane. Zane. Yeah. And Chris. Chris. Chris Dillon. Chris the bass player. Yeah. Shimmy'd up there. Zane, so do you just do music? Yeah, I mean, I write and direct video stuff, and then I have a job that's kind of comedic,

and then me and him just do this. What's that job? I work at the show Ridiculousness. Oh, cool. Yeah. That's fun. I'm the editor in the writer's room there. Oh, very cool.

Yeah. Very awesome. It's a lot of fun. Yeah, it seems really like a neat job. Yeah, mainly like live. It's just we's a lot of fun. Yeah. It seems really like a neat job. Yeah, mainly like live. It's just we have a bunch of music projects we do around town. So you work at the studios on Seward, right? No, so we shoot there, but then we have an office in Glendale. Oh, they make you go all the way to Glendale.

I live in Burbank, so it's actually really nice. Awesome. It's like a 10-minute drive to work. What part of Burbank? Five minutes away from Flappers. On Magnolia. Magnolia and fucking Buena Vista is pretty close.

Look at that. Magnolia and Buena Vista. You can hit up Ryan. Oh, we're neighbors? Maybe you guys could go to Big Boy and talk about This is like an SNL sketch. First you take the 405. We could go to Olive Garden in Burbank. Do you like talking 405. We got it all guarded. Burbank. Do you like talking about poop, piss, and squirt while you're eating?

Yeah, I do. It happens at work a lot. You seem like an amazing womanizer. You have that perfect lead singer look. You're pretty much dressed exactly like Ali Makovsky. Dude, we get that all the fucking time. You look a little bit like Billy Corgan.

I'll take that. I mean that as a compliment. No, take it. She thinks so too. So that's nice. She can give you a massage. The Chroma Keys. Are you celebrating Black History Month at all?

What are you doing for that? You know, just staying inside mostly. I was hoping we wouldn't get up. I feel bad about it actually. I was hoping it would all be all black comics. We got up the whitest thing possible. Let's face it, they got lucky last night at the Oscars.

That's a joke, people. Shut up. The bucket, I mean, it's just random. The bucket's black. What the fuck are you looking at over there? Back to you being a womanizer. You have a girlfriend right now? I do, I do. I do have a girlfriend, yes.

How long have you had this girlfriend for? Six years. Everything's pierced on her, right? Vagina pierced? No, no tattoos, no piercings. Whoa, that surprises me. Cool, man. Is she a Christian or not?

No, not a Christian. Very much the opposite of that. Not Jewish. Jewish is not the opposite. Not Jewish. We're from Oklahoma, and they don't really grow there. There's not a lot of OJs. No.

And where are you from originally? Harrah, Oklahoma. Oh, Oklahoma. I got a pink guy out there one time. A pink guy? Really? Harrah, Oklahoma. Oh, Oklahoma. I got pink eye out there one time. Pink eye, really? Shawnee. Shawnee, that's really close to where we're from, yeah. I thought it was actually.

It's like the one casino there, and then that's about it, yeah. But who gave you pink eye, Theo? Was it like Judy Garland's granddaughter or something like that? I don't know. It was a pretty legit strand, though, I call it. Everyone in Shawnee always has pink eye. It's just a thing. Basically red eye.

And it's never eye. It's always the eyes. I always get them both. Yeah, you don't have one pink eye. I got one. Just one? Yeah. How do you have a story at the ready for everything?

It's unbelievable. What, I got pink eye once? You don't have that hair and not have a story for everything. But by where he grew up Yeah well I remember where I got it He sounds like he would do well in Oklahoma Like they would love you We had a good time out there man

We had a nice time You know who I met when I was there There was a man named Jerry Mathers Who was on Leave it to Beaver Which was a television show And I met him in person And he was always an idol of mine when I was young And I met him and he goes Where do you live? I said mine when I was young. And I met him, and he goes, where do you live?

I said, I live in Santa Monica. And he goes, I used to go get some pussy in Santa Monica. That's what he said to me. That sounds like an old man. He's about 87 now, 86, 87. The guy from Leave It to Beaver gave you pink eye? No, he just told me about the pussy. I got pink eye by myself.

Ooh, that's the Leave it to Beaver theme for those of you that don't remember 1973. Most of it's on YouTube now. Alright. The Chroma. Is anything else crazy about you? Any hobbies or anything like that?

Chris, what are you getting into? He works out a lot. You can see the shoes, the running shoes. He's really into looking nice for the ladies. He's the womanizer of the group, actually. Mr. Chris over here. I don't know what you said. Huh? I don't know what you said.

I was getting called a womanizer, and I was saying, you're the womanizer of the group with these biceps. Alright, look at you two. Five years falling in love on a live podcast. I turned around for one second. We don't see each other that often anymore. We used to live together. For four years we lived together, and he just moved out like two weeks ago.

I moved down the street. It's not very far, but we don't see each other very often. We're best friends. Come on. Hallelujah. The Chroma Keys. Yep. There you go. The Chroma Keys. Yep. There you go.

Thank you very much. Zane and Chris, the Chroma Keys. Thank you very much. Look at the drawing from Ryan J. Ebel. Look what Ryan J. Ebel drew tonight, ladies and gentlemen. Look at this. He's bringing it up. The winner for Best Supporting Actress is...

There you go. Your drawing from Ryan J. E. Belt, everybody. Isn't that crazy? Look at you. That looks like you. That looks like Theo. That looks like Red Band. That looks like me.

He drew that while we were here. All those prints are available at ryanjebelt.com. Bunch of fun stuff going on at tonyhenchcliffe.com. And you guys, plug away. What's going on, anybody? You got any... Oh, I'm going to be at... at TonyHinchcliffe.com and you guys, plug away. What's going on anybody? Oh, I'm going to be at I'm going to be at, oh I got a podcast called This Past Weekend

you can check out. And I'm going to be on Joe's podcast tomorrow. Oh shit. The Joe Rogan experience. Theo Vaughn, you're going to have so much fun with that. That's huge. Sal, what are you guys on? Season 7? 6 right now. Season six, baby, of my favorite fucking show, The Impractical Joker.

Thank you so much. Thank you. It's so funny. That's the only show that I watch and I constantly, you can't help it. You're giggling through the whole entire episode. It's that funny. I love it. I purposely don't watch it while I'm at home so that it's all that I watch when I'm on

the road at hotels. It's the only thing I watch other than forensic files. Yeah, we get that a lot. As soon as I realize that I've seen the forensic files three times before, I make the immediate switch. I love that show. I literally cannot sleep unless I know somebody's been murdered. Yeah, totally. It gives me my eternal rest that I need.

Weird, huh? Jeremiah Watkins, one of the most cold-blooded assassins in all of comedy right now. He's part of absolutely everything. He's a phenom. Literally one of my favorite comedians in the world. I'm so happy that he's part of this band every single week. Go ahead.

Thank you so much. Very sweet. At Jeremiah's stand-up on social media, sorry if there's a delay in my response to you. My phone is on the fritz right now. March 14th is the next stand-up on the spot here in the belly room. Every second Tuesday of the month,

come check it out. Lots of good people on it. Patty Reagan's Patty Reagan on Twitter. He has a new album out called Bad Chad. We love him. Make some fucking noise for Patty Reagan, Patty Reagan on Twitter He has a new album out called Bad Chad We love him Make some fucking noise for Patty Reagan Ladies and gentlemen P-A-T-T-Y-R-E-G-A-N

Bad Chad available on iTunes, SoundCloud Motherfucking everything And check out this season of the Eric Andre Show Because Pat Reagan is also a writer for that Joel Jimenez, the great Russian of percussion At mostly sorry I'm sorry for calling that guy an earthworm earlier.

And I'm on that chroma key song, Not Going to Bed, if you want to hear me play drums on that. Alright, cool. Alright, thanks a lot. Hey, guys. We have a big show on Wednesday. Yeah, this Wednesday, Tom Segura, Chris DeLeon, maybe the... Tony's on it. I'm on it. And maybe the secret guest is

right to the right of me. Who knows? Anything could happen. This Wednesday, big secret, top secret death squad stand up show. Wednesday here in the main room.

In the main room of the comedy store. Check us out if you're in Austin, Texas or Houston, Texas April 21st and April 23rd. This show, Kill Tony, is going to be there

and I'm traveling everywhere for stand up comedy every single weekend. That's available at TonyHinchcliffe.com. Live audience, thank you so much I love you guys good night The perfect me. Before I hang on a cross.

All it got in but hope. What a perfect Sunday. All it got in but hope. Yeah, there was Monday morning. All it got in but hope. What a perfect Sunday. All it got in but hope. Yeah, there was Monday morning. Bye. Yeah, it was Monday morning. Thank you. you