KILL TONY - KILL TONY #392 - LA JOLLA #1

Episode Date: September 26, 2019

William Montgomery, Joel Jimenez, Chris Dillon, Jeremiah Watkins, Tony Hinchcliffe, Brian Redban – Date: 09/22/2019 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Hey, this is Red Band, and you're listening to Kill Tony. We have a bunch of new tour dates, so go to DeathSquad.tv, click on tour dates. We added a second show in Dallas because the first show sold out. So October 5th, Kill Tony Dallas has just been added. October 25th, we have Kill Tony Brisbane, Australia.

October 26th, we're in Melbourne, Australia. 27th, we are in Sydney, Australia. Then November 7th, we are at Washington, D.C. Go to DeathSquad.TV and click on tour dates for all the latest updates. Also, check out Tony Hinchcliffe's website, TonyHinchcliffe.com. There he has even more tour dates for his comedy and merch and a bunch of stuff. Go to TonyHinchcliffe.com.

Ryan J. Ebelt, he's the house artist. He draws every episode and he has a brand new book that's up for presale right now that has every drawing that he's ever done on Kill Tony. So go to Ryan J. Ebelt dot com. And last but not least, Shop Squad dot TV, the official merchandise of the Death Squad universe. You got Death Squad hats, shirts, mugs. We got some Kill Tony stuff left. So check it out. And now here's a brand new episode of Kill Tony. Hey, this is Redman coming to you live from the La Jolla Comedy Store for a brand new episode of Kill Tony. Give it up for Tony Hedgecliffe.

La Jolla, we're back. Make some fucking noise for these listeners. Yowie. Brian Redband's here, everybody. It's me, Tony Hedgecliffe, one of the top Young Rising comedians in the world. And look what we got over here, the real deal, Ryan Chae Ebel, all the way from beautiful Los Angeles,

California. He draws every single episode of the show, and he gets to go on the road every once in a while. This is one of those sweet stops here in beautiful La Jolla. Yeah, and tonight he's brought all the past posters that he's ever done that he has left. So he has a bunch of posters out there.

So cool. An easy, easy trip to be able to bring every poster ever made. So on your way out, be sure to check those out. There's also Kill Tony pins available after the show, and there's also Tony Hinchcliffe pins available. If you want, I can take a black Sharpie and draw a little mustache

on them, and that's permanent. Okie dokie. Also, Kill Tony the book is available now at ryanjebelt.com, including all those past prints he draws every episode. He's already started drawing tonight's episode. This is a special La Jolla one,

so there's probably like a dolphin and a Ferrari or something like that inside of it. And shout out to the great Don Carlos Burritos. I don't know how close or far you guys live to Don Carlos. It's right down the street here. A staple in this area. And every time I come here for 12 years, I always eat at Don Carlos Burritos. And we had so much fun.

Yes. We all at one point at about 5 p.m. today, we all just almost decided to sleep through these shows. But we got a second wind and we're pumped about it. And here's a word from the rest of our amazing sponsors here at the number one live podcast in the world. Yeah, I want to tell you about Monday.com, a team management tool that will improve your office workflow. Monday.com makes it team management tool that will improve your office workflow. Monday.com makes it easy to track projects and stay productive. Instead of emails, spreadsheets, random files, whiteboards, to-do lists, post-it note reminders,

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Beautiful La Jolla, Californiaia this crowd is excited and i'm excited too as with all road shows we go guest list so that we could really feel the the thriving backbone of the show and a shout out by the way we are here at the comedy store this is uh the sister club to the great Comedy Store up north where I got my start and worked there as the door guy. There's a bunch of great door guys that are comedians that, you know, really promising people. This is a very special place, so I'm happy to be here with you guys.

And since you're probably fans of the show, you might know that there is a band on this show. I mean, I guess. They're one of my favorite things in all of comedy. Some of my funniest friends in the entire world. They are my inspiration. They are the best damn band in the land. It's the Kill Tony

band. Jeremiah Watkins, Chroma Chris, and Jolbert Joel Jimenez. Uh-oh. Every single episode, they're different characters. I never know what they're going to be. They got ready in the manager's office tonight. Whoa.

I think we've seen these guys before. Wow. These are definitely coach-like figures. I do believe they are coaches of some kind. This guy's wearing a jacket that says coach on it. He has a whistle. He has very loose mesh shorts on. I mean, clearly the drawstring has been out of those for a while.

Kansas University. I know somebody that went there. That's crazy. What's your name, Coach? Coach Roy Robeson, head coach at Johnson County Community College. Roy Robeson. Roy Robeson. Tony Hinchcliffe.

Wow. Man, you're already so mad at me. We just started. Take a lap. Oh my god. I can tell the podcast listeners are going to love that whistle by the end of the episode. And then clearly over here we have the crocodile hunter,

everybody. How exciting. I didn't realize that you're into coaching. Where do you coach at? Jordan High Cougars. Tony, you know, if you want your team to be the best, your coach has to be better than everybody else out there. That's why

I only coach women's sports. Thank you. Wow. Go varsity. Wow. Chroma Chris has already said more this episode than all year. This is exciting.

Killing it in La Jolla. He's got that sea wind energy to him. And then speaking of, okay. I mean, clearly back here we have, I mean, you look like some type of like Mexican cabbage patch doll or something. You look like. We're going to go with coach-like figure. That's what you said at the top of the show. Yeah, you're a coach, huh?

Yeah, my name is Chris Johanson. I'm from Beaver Tits, Florida. Beaver Tits, Florida? You fucking heard it right, you son of a bitch. Oh my God. You have real anger problems. These kids would do what I tell them. I'd be a little happier.

What was your name again? I accidentally only wrote down Beaver Tits. What is your name? Beaver Tits for short again? I accidentally only wrote down Beaver Tits. What was your name? Beaver Tits for short. I'm going to call you Beaver Tits the rest of the episode. We got Beaver Tits. We got Jordan. Wait, no.

What was your name? Jordan High Cougars? Coach Donnie. Coach Donnie. Coach Donnie. That's extra fucking pedophily. Women's sports only. Roy Robison?

Roy Robison. Okay. So we have all the coaches. We have Red Band. And then look at this, everybody. It's a bucket of destiny for tonight's show. This is the special bucket that was made for us for our summer tour. We took this all around America with us,

and I grabbed it on my way out before leaving the place today. And I'm excited to pull some names out of it. You guys know how it works. Sometimes it's somebody's first time ever on stage. Sometimes it's a local hot talent that just wants to get seen and, you know, flex their muscles. Sometimes it's someone that's just horrible. Sometimes it's someone with serious

mental problems, but we just try to laugh our way through it. You guys ready to start this thing or what? If I pull your name out of the bucket, if I pull your name out, you get 60 seconds. You know your time is up when you hear the sound of a kitten. That means wrap it up then or

we're gonna bring out the angry Pacific Beach Bear. The only entrance is over there so don't try to jump up any other way. If you get called you have to make all the way over here. You guys ready to do it? Let's fucking go baby. Show number one.

La Jolla, California. How many of you are coming to the second show tonight as well? Wow. Loyal diehard fans. Well, since there's so many loyal fans here, you might know that usually a one-word name does pretty good on this show. Or horrible.

Let's see what happens. Your first comedian going up tonight goes by the name of Jeff. G-E-O-F-F. Hey! Woo! One more time for Jeff, everybody! Thanks, Tony. The name is

Jeff, spelled G-E-O-F-F. I recently called T-Mobile and they said, I'm sorry, sir, your name is Jeff, spelled G-E-O-F-F. I recently called T-Mobile, and they said, I'm sorry, sir, your name is not in our system. Are you sure you spelled that correctly? Yes, I know how to spell my name, but my parents did not. I got a lot of nicknames in high school and middle school, like G-Off and G-Fry. My personal favorite, Gay-Off.

Or in Mad Libs, I found out my name spelled backwards is You're a Fag. So I got picked on a lot in middle school. So I hung out with the girls because they were typically nicer. And I guess you could say I developed a few tendencies. Like, I talk with my hands a lot. I have more swimsuits than you guys should. And I like to put phallic objects in my...

But I'm not gay. G off. Getting this show started here in La Jolla. Very confusing ending. That was like the ending of Sopranos or something like that. I don't know what happened there. You said you love shoving stuff up your ass, but you're not gay. I'm not gay.

So what do you shove up your ass? I don't put anything up my ass. You don't put anything up your ass, but you just said that you love shoving stuff up your ass. Well, no, that's the joke. Oh, no, it's not, you son of a bitch. No, it's not. You don't say. I've been doing this 12 and a half years. You don't

say that. You don't say that for the sake of a joke. Oh, just shoves stuff up the butt. Not gay. Yeah, you're not gay and I'm not a triple-A all-state athlete. now gay. Yeah, you're not gay and I'm not a triple-A all-state athlete.

Come on. What are we talking about? Something's been in your butt your entire life. Just toilet paper. Just toilet paper? Just toilet paper. Gay. What? It's soft and fluffy. It's that fucking... It may have been tougher, though. What kind of toilet paper was it?

Brawny? Yeah, brawny. He shoves the roll up. Turn it sideways, sit on it. I mean, it's just a little bit confusing, the whole set. It was, hey, my name's Jeff, and it's spelled G-E-O, and I got called this and I hung out with this and then I shoved

stuff up my ass. I'm not gay. Good night. It's just a real twist there at the end that I just can't believe you would just say that out of nowhere. Yeah, what sport did you play? Triple gay baseball? Tell us more. Tell us about you, Jeff.

How long have you been doing stand-up? This is my first time in like three years. Wow. Oh, first time. What a twist there. Again, another big twist with you. First time, Tony, in three years. Heck yeah.

Totally not gay. No, I did stand-up for like eight months or so. Yeah, about eight months. You ever do anything else for eight months? No, I play a lot of volleyball. I don't know. Oh, not gay. Plays a lot of...

This is a great list of shit gay guys don't do. Shuffles up their ass and play volleyball. Never heard of that before. You're one of the least gay dudes don't do. Shuff stuff up their ass and play volleyball. Never heard of that before. You're one of the least gay dudes ever, bro. So what else are we into? Volleyball was answer number one, by the way. Not like all my beach volleyball buddies are back there.

Yeah, I know. You tried to correct yourself and you made it gayer. It's not just regular volleyball. It's just me. We play beach volleyball. Me and the guys. You know what I mean?

Just fucking... Nothing gay about a game of shirts and skins. That's all skins. Volleyball is a no-shirts game, right? Yeah, no shirts. It is if he's involved. You ever hear me... Why would there be shirts if he's involved. You ever hear me?

Why would there be shirts if he's involved? Oh, I thought you said the other thing. Oh, yeah. I feel like you never serve and only ask to receive. Hey. Heck yeah. So when you're not playing volleyball, what else do you do for fun? I ride a motorcycle.

Oh, let me guess, on the back. He's trying to trick us again. He'll say something womanly, then he'll say something manly, then he'll say something womanly, then manly. How long have you been riding in the side car of this motorcycle? No, no side car. No, no side car. It's a very like Robin energy

like Batman and Robin. You seem very much like you'd be in the side car or something like that. If you were gay, you had to choose. Would you be a top or a bottom? I'd be a top unless I was a bottom. Oh, my God. Okay.

So what's your love life like? I got a fiance. Yeah. But it's a guy. No, come on. She's back there. We're getting married in fiance. Yeah. But it's a guy. No, come on. She's back there. We're getting married in February. Wow, that's so cool.

Give her a hand, everybody. It takes a lot of courage to marry a gay man in 2019. It's incredible. I'm so glad that they allow gay marriage now so that you can marry a woman. You still have to get a gay marriage license. No, we understand, sir, that you're marrying a woman. However, we did see you on the Kill Tony

podcast, so you still have to sign a gay marriage certificate. That's fucking awesome. What does she do? She works at a bracelet company. Oh, a bracelet company. That's the least gay thing he's said so far. I don't know. What does she do? She works at a bracelet company. Oh, a bracelet company. Wait, why? That's the least gay thing he's said so far.

I don't know. He's got two bracelets on. Yeah, I actually have a few of the bracelets on. Oh, those are her company? Yeah. Those are just strings. She makes a living from that? Yeah, yeah.

It's a company of like 50-some people. How about you? What do you do? Did I ask you that already? Yeah, yeah. It's a company, like, 50-some people. How about you? What do you do? Did I ask you that already? No, I work at a hospital. I do UCSD Health. UCSD Health. There's a big fan of that.

Uh-huh. Somebody's got free fucking something. Some janky employee health care here. UCSD. And you do what? What do you do there? I do data analytics. Data analytics? Yeah, so like insurance analytics.

Basically old people getting them out of the hospital. Wow. Yeah. So you're the one that just screws people over and charges them a bunch of money. No, no, no. I'm making sure that they get somewhere in like a good home. Get good care out of the hospital. Any of those old

people when they're leaving, do they ever call you a fag? No, I can't say they have. Because old people say things like that. That's why I could say that there if anybody's looking back on this from the future and wondering how I got away with saying that word. He says... I'm saying that old people say that word.

Not me. I would never say that word, but old people do. I have to do that now every episode of Kill Tony, if you guys are wondering. It's a special time we live in right now. To think that I'm the one out of the two of us that might lose work out of this appearance of you on this show. It's pretty crazy. Wow. So, Geoff, that's so much fun.

I can't imagine what your last name must be. You talked about your first name and you left your last name off. What's the reason for that? No, it's actually Kramer.

Kramer? Wow. The last time there was a Kramer on stage, it was a hell of a performance. Thank you, sir! It's incredible. You ever say the N-word?

No. How many of you think he should have his first time here tonight? I'm kidding, guys. This beautiful black woman just cheered for that in the front. Hey! I guess if you give him permission, it's okay.

All right. Go ahead, man. Let's keep it moving. That was Jeff, everybody. And the show has begun. G-E-O-F-F. Fuck yeah. It has begun, ladies and gentlemen.

You can feel it in the room. The feeling of anything can happen. I can't believe these people signed up. I can't believe she makes money selling string bracelets. Yeah, I know. It's unbelievable. It must be all profit because it just looked like the most basic bracelet I've ever seen in my life. Just literally strings. Felt like I could rip right through it like a Hulk Hogan tank top.

Okay. This is a real name. It feels real. Put your hands together for Nathan Driver. Nathan Driver. Here he comes. Here he comes. Here he is, Nathan Driver, ladies and gentlemen. Hey, guys, how's it going?

Hey, man, my name's Nathan. I'm excited to be here. I'm 28 years old. I had a pretty big adult milestone. Finally, my mom stopped paying for my phone bill. Thank you. Her funeral is on Friday. If you guys

had $60... I'm going through a breakup right now. It's tough. I'm trying to be a better person. A lot of guys, when they go through a breakup, they'll get in the gym, right? They'll try to get swole. They'll put up pictures of them flexing in the mirror. That's cool, man, but that's called a revenge body. That's cool, but I feel like I don't really get girls with my body. I get them with what's on the inside.

So I'm working on my revenge personality right now. Like I'm trying to be more interesting. I'm putting up pictures with me with minorities. Like, look who's not racist anymore. with me with minorities. Look who's not racist anymore. I think my cat might be gay. That's annoying. Oh, fuck. I just messed that joke up.

I'm sorry. Wait, can I start over? Can I start over? It's quick. If you want to, sure. My cat thinks I'm gay, and that is... That is annoying. All right, that's it. Thanks, you guys.

Oh, that was it. That's more of just a sentence. Why does your cat think you're gay? Do you go play beach volleyball with the guys? Yeah. No, I don't, but... No? Why did you say that? Why does your cat think you're gay? It's kind of a misdirect.

Good joke. I guess I lost my way in the misdirect. I guess it was like... I say... Sorry, I'm a little nervous. It's okay. You did great, by the way. How about another hand for Nathan Driver, guys?

Why does your cat think you're gay? It's just a misdirect. Is this going to be a theme tonight where people do pretty okay and then they just close with psychotic shit? Killed my mom last night. Thanks, good night. Hey, can you tell me more about that?

No, I mean, that was a joke, Tony. Do you always tell it the way that you told her? Yeah, I say, I think my cat might be gay. Oh, wait, I messed that joke up. And then normally they're like, uh-huh. I mean, I think people are curious about this gay cat. And then the joke is, oh, he didn't really... Everything else was so good, and I can't...

No matter how many times you explain this cat thing, I'm not kidding. It's my closer. That's your real closer? Really? You do so good, and then you just close awkwardly? Like, fucking thanks. Remember all the other things? Good night.

Judge me from all the other jokes. Thank you. That's my time. Sorry. Could I ask one thing? Sure. I guess you're the one asking questions. I did the show once before

And there was a Nathan off Do you remember that? Remind me Two Nathans got pulled up We had similar names out of the bucket And you just made us both go up I was going to ask if there were any other Nathans In the crowd that wanted to challenge me

But I want to make sure it's okay with you What the fuck are you thinking right now? What the fuck? I'm not going to do it. Part of the day. What type of weed did you smoke? And you're like, you know what, dude? If Tony calls me up after my set, before he keeps the momentum going, I'm going to ask

him if we could do my idea. Like, what part of that in which you're like, it's going to fucking work, man. I know it. If I do that gay cat thing Just right The momentum He's just gonna let me do Whatever I fucking want

Hey are there any Nathans in the crowd And then you told your friend Hey your name is Nathan For tonight So you could do a spot No I didn't No I didn't

Oh yeah No look at this Red band's fucking way ahead of it Steve Bannon over here Thinks moves ahead He's always He thinks like a I did not do that Oh, look at this. Red Band's fucking way ahead of it. Steve Bannon over here thinks moves ahead. He's always, he thinks like a. I did not do that.

You can think like a. Good old Steve Bannon music right there. I love it. Oh, my goodness. Nathan, it's okay. I can tell you're a little bit sick to your stomach now because everybody's laughing at you after that horrible idea that you had. I did think it would work. I'm sorry. Just out of curiosity, are there any other Nathans out there?

Wait, that's a Nathan? Is that true? Oh, he just did a shot of whiskey. No, we're good. That's frightening. I'm scared of that dude. All right. Is there any other Roys out there?

I will beat you in a foot race right now. That would be pretty epic. I would take everybody outside to the street to watch that. An actual foot race. How many of you think we should end tonight's episode with a foot race out on this street? Roy, you might have to do that. Bonus footage or something. Bonus footage. Or something. All right, so Nathan, tell us about you.

You're 28 years old. You had a good joke about your phone bill because your mom died. You did the breakup revenge shit and then the gay cat. The gay cat, yeah. So tell us about your normal life. You're 28. You just went through a breakup, you said? No, that's kind of an old joke.

Wow. Hey, what does a gay cat sound like? Yeah, what? Yes. Wow. I should do that. I should just do that. Very good.

You can have that. I'll never use that shit joke again. Oh, yeah. That one goes straight into his litter box. You be careful. That's a varsity head coach. Don't mess with him. He's a serious man.

Johnson County Community College head coach. Would I go pro? Yes, I would. Did your mom really die? No. I never wished a mom was dead more. Does she still pay your phone bill? No, no.

That part's true. Really? You pay your phone bill? No, no, that part's true. Really? You pay your phone bill? Yes. What do you do for work? I work at a medical device company in San Diego. What's the medical device that you work for? Fleshlights. What is that?

Is that so you don't get pregnant? That's diabetes, right? Yeah, it's a continuous glucose monitor. You have diabetes? I don't, but I'm... You just fucking represent the device company that you work for? You're just a prop comic? I work in R&D, so I kind of guinea pig some of them on myself.

What's R&D? Like research and development. I thought it was Raphael and Donatella. So you don't actually put the medication in. It's like Gatorade or something, right? No, it's testing like an R&D version on myself. R&D? You're talking about...

Oh, R&D. I thought it was a different thing. I got lost there. Okay, I'm sorry. So, Nathan, you said that that was an old joke about your love life, about a breakup. So, what is your love life like now? You seem like the kind of guy that... I got a girl who's not texting me back right now.

Oh, really? Did her mom stop paying her phone bill? No. I think I was a little needy, maybe, is part of the problem. Yeah, tell us about it. What makes you needy? Where do you think you went wrong?

Well, I was doing the comedy thing for a while, and then I wasn't really having a lot of sex with the ladies. And then I started, and then it was cool, and I didn't want to stop. But she was like, let's pump the brakes. Oh, man, you just told that story so poorly. I'm sorry. You started, and she was like, let's pump the brakes. Oh, man. You just told that story so poorly. I'm sorry.

You started and then you stopped and then that was it. You started what? You started having sex with her? Yes. She's a comedian too. No, she's not. But we met at a comedy show.

She was just an audience member? Yeah. And what happened after the show? You were out there. You were smoking. She came up to you. She came up to me and she said we had similar hair.

Oh, gross. Absolutely disgusting. And she was gross. Let me be clear. Is that true? She's gross? No, no. She's the hottest girl I've ever seen in my life.

You're just lying again for a laugh. Unsuccessfully. Have you noticed that? That it doesn't work that well? Tell us something honest about yourself that you wouldn't want to tell us. That I wouldn't want to tell you? Don't think about it too much.

Just answer it. Yeah, like when I sat on the stool, I accidentally sat on my 43-year-old nutsack. See? That was honest. Something embarrassing about yourself. Something you wouldn't normally want to admit.

You have successful parents that are still... I have diabetes only in my left leg. There you go. Nathan, are you thinking? Yeah, I can't think of something embarrassing right now. You can't think of something embarrassing. Do you see my point? You need to work on that.

If lactating was a sport, I would be professional. Wow. I've seen that before. Nathan, you have successful parents that are still together? No. Really? No. How long ago did they break up?

They're still married but they're separated. They're separated. How separated? So they got traded to another team or what are we talking here? They got traded to another team a decade ago and my dad he watches Alex Jones videos now in his room.

Awesome. Yeah, it's pretty sick, actually. What do you do? You go shooting with them sometimes? No, not really. I go back home. I'm from North Carolina. I go back there like once a year, and he's like,

he's like, man, fucking CNN, dude, and then that's it. Sounds like me. All right, well. That's fun. What's your mom up to? She... She has a new black boyfriend, am I correct? No, no, no, no, okay.

She lives with a lady that she met on the internet. Oh, shit. It's actually, I try to do a joke about it, but it bombed all the time. I bet it does. My cat thinks my mom is gay. Oh, there it is. It has begun.

So how long has she been living with this other woman? It's like on and off. Because she lives in New York. On and off for a year and a half. And has she told you that she's a lesbian? No, she swears she's not. I've asked. Really?

Yeah. Really? Yes. Can we call her right now and ask her if she's a lesbian? Put her on speakerphone. It's 11 o'clock there. We'll give it a shot. She's probably awake and eating pussy right now.

We'll give it a shot. Put it on speaker and put the butt of the phone to the end of the microphone. And if it goes to voicemail, pull the phone away from the microphone. Shh. Nathan? Oh, hey, Mom. How's it going? Why are you calling me?

Are you gay? What? I just, I'm in front of a, I'm just with some friends, and I just want to know if you're gay, I guess, is the question.

If I'm gay or not? Yeah. Why are you asking what a weird question? You just woke me up. Are you thinking you're gay? Wow. Standing ovation. These people in La Jolla are loving this moment.

These are the moments that you cannot produce. Nathan's mom, congratulations. You just killed Tony. You talk to her later. We love you. Goodbye. Actually, you could continue the call because I'm going to get rid of you right now. That was incredible. Congratulations. I'm pretty sure you just call because I'm going to get rid of you right now. That was incredible. Congratulations. I'm pretty sure you just found out he's gay.

A lot of people coming out of the closet for their first time on Kill Tony here tonight. Some people realizing they're gay. Some people finding out they're gay from their own mother. This is incredible. All gay San Diego episode. Wow. Stuff you'll never see on Saturday Night Live. Who's the next gay guy coming to the stage? Welcome to Gay Kill Tony.

Welcome to another episode of Butt Fuck Tony. Ow. Wow. I mean, this guy's probably not gay. I mean, the numbers would say that he's not going to be gay, right? However, this name is incredible. Put your hands together for Pablo Pantaleon. Pablo Pantaleon. Here he comes.

One more time for Pablo, everybody. Hey. Yes. I just had a baby, you guys. I'm a dad now. Hey, thank you. I'm blessed. He's healthy.

Right now he's at home with his mom in Mexico, and they'll never find me here. And God is good. and they'll never find me here. And God is good. I like that joke because my dad gave it to me when I met him last year, dude. He's a funny guy, apparently, man. Dude, when I met my dad, I was mad, dude, because he had like a really good beard, man.

You know, like a nice beard. I just have like this chin dynasty thing going on, you know? But hey, at least I got my mom's big ass nipples though, you know? At least I got big lady nipples. I don't know why. I have to wear

Hawaiian shirts to hide them. Thank you, thank you. I am Mexican, but I'm transitioning into Filipino, and just for the next four years, you know. All right, that's my time. Wow, Pablo Pantaleon. What a performance. Amazing work.

Thank you, thank you. Have you been on this show before? No, never. My goodness, how long have you been doing stand-up? Four years. Incredible. All here in San Diego? Yeah, yeah.

Wow. Great set. What do you do for work? I'm a pool boy, and I actually work here. Wow. That's Mexican as fuck. Yeah, man. You're a door guy here as well?

Yeah. Incredible, man. Mind-boggling. One of the stronger performances from a door guy we've ever had on the show. You hear that? These guys are all... You're going to have a bunch of angry... All the white guys are going to be mad at you.

It is true. They work harder. My goodness. How long have you been a pool boy for? Two years, yeah. Two years. Two years. Do you ever have sex with any of the white housewives? No, and I try.

You try? What do you do to try? I just kind of like... Whoa, look at that. Are you serious? That's incredible. I try to do a good job, but they don't really look out their window enough,

I feel like. Really? Yeah, they're always watching BBC or some shit. I don't know. My goodness. Big Black Cocks? What the fuck? Oh, BBC.

I love it. So, Pablo, has anything crazy ever happened while you've been being a pool boy? We always hear all these rumors when we see all these pornos. You know, maybe some guys pull it off. I'm not that kind of guy. I spend a lot of my time in my head. Do you always dress like Mexican John Lovitz?

I guess so. Yeah, I wear a lot of Hawaiian shirts. You do? Yeah, a lot of floral. You ever thought of just working at Trader Joe's? No. I'm looking for new work, so maybe I should go in there. Has anyone ever told you you look like The Rock if he had leukemia? I actually, I have a, I have a, I have a picture on my Instagram that compares us, which is clearly like not, he's so much bigger and handsomer, you know?

Yeah, no, I know. We all know that. Yeah, The Rock is much more bigger and handsomer. And also more famous. Did you catch the part where I said with leukemia? I think you only heard the beginning there. You have selective hearing, Pablo. Wow. What do you do for fun?

I do a lot of stand-up. Yeah, other than that. Man, I wish... Come on, for fun, pal. I fight a little bit. I used to fight. I grew up doing MMA, jiu-jitsu, stuff like that. Oh my goodness, Joel here knows jiu-jitsu as well.

Do you want a roll? Sure. Are we about to have a fucking Mexican jiu-jitsu tournament right here? Hey, if I win, I'm in the drums, though. Do you know how to play drums? No. Oh, goddammit. Don't tease me like that, Pablo.

But I can learn, bro. No, it's okay. I mean, we've tried the jiu-jitsu thing before. I'm going to be honest with you. It just always ends up looking super gay and awkward. That one guy would be into it. It gets... I think the crowd would rather see his

juicy lady nipples. Yeah, I was going to get there. That was the next thing on my list, was these big nips. Is that true, or was this one of these La Jolla lies that we've been dealt throughout the evening? It's a lie. Are you serious? Let's see the nips.

Let's see the nips. Let's see the nips. They're not that great. Let's see the nips. Here we go. Whoa. They're long. You could tie balloons to those. Those are pretty long.

Oh, he's flicking it. Tie balloons to it. How do you think of these things? Have you ever tried it? It's fun. No. You do that with your nipples? When they're cold like that. How do you think of these things? Have you ever tried it? It's fun. No. You do that with your nipples? When they're cold like that. How many balloons can you get on there?

You're like the house from up. Alright. Pablo, what do your parents do? My mom works in a factory and I still don't know my dad. Wow. Wow. Wow. My goodness. That's him out there clapping.

He's excited that you still don't know who he is. What kind of factory does your mom work in? I think she makes metal parts for airplanes and stuff. But she's not like... She just kind of sands stuff down. I don't think it's like she has a lot of responsibility. She's a great woman, all right? Do you know how to play catch?

Huh? Do you know how to play catch? No, I don't. I will teach you after I whoop this guy's name, Roy, over here, supposedly in a foot race. I'll teach you how to throw a football, sir. All right, man. Thank you. That's incredible. All right.

He didn't have a dad growing up. He needs to learn. Have you ever tried to look for your dad? I hung out with him when I was 13, but we didn't stay in touch, and I didn't really learn too much about him. What did you guys do? You had one of those weird dad dates where he took you to somewhere that you wanted to go at the time and then you

realized that you could have spent that opportunity communicating with them but instead you played at video games or something like that no we we just we just ate uh we just ate breakfast and then he told me that he would answer like a lot of my questions and I just didn't really have any right yeah because the moment was overwhelming for you. Tony, that was really specific. Oh, you don't know your dad either? Or you didn't know your dad? No, I know my dad. But I do know what it's like, you know.

It is a high-pressure situation when you don't get to see them very often. Yeah, yeah. So now that you're older, don't you want to reconnect and be like, okay, you know, I was 11 at that point. Maybe I could play Xbox with him or something. Right. You didn't get to play video games then, so how about now? Well, I don't know. It's in

Mexico as far. Oh, he's in Mexico. Oh, perfect. Fuck him. It's not worth it. Yeah. Were you born here? I was born in TJ. Tijuana. So are you an American citizen? I became a citizen in 2016, I think.

How'd you do that? Thank you, thank you. I just went in there, had an interview with some black officer. Wow, jeez. Why did it have to be a black officer? Why did that really stand out to you? I think my experience was unique because he was cool. Aren't black people usually cool?

That's what I'm saying. I didn't talk to a white guy that maybe had like... Because white guys follow rules, right? He might have tested me. The black guy was just like, so you grew up here? And I was like, yeah. And he's like, well, I mean, yeah, dude.

You're in. You have people that are morally corrupt. The way you just said white people follow the rules is the most racist thing I've ever heard in my entire life. And I feel like I'm the only one that really noticed it. It was really hidden in there real well, just camouflaged in with the rest of a couple sentences. Nope, I noticed it.

I'm burning with rage right now. White people follow the rules. So there's some insinuation there that black people don't follow the rules. No, they follow the rules, but they're also maybe, I don't know. You're getting real nervous now. You're tightening the mic stand, looking over your shoulder at the beautiful, lovely,

young Aphrodite's daughter is here, everybody. In the flesh. You've obviously never heard of the Ten Crack Commandments. Now, it's a biggie song. All right, never mind. Back to you in the studio, Tony. Thank you. Is that really how it usually works, though? He's just right, never mind. Back to you in the studio, Tony. Thank you.

Is that really how it usually works, though? He's just like, oh, well, you lived here a lot, so you can become a citizen. Was this, like, at a gas station, behind a gas station, in a car? No, it was in a government building. I'm just saying it felt like... Like a library? It felt like we were, like, cool. Like, it felt like we were buddies.

I just imagine it being more stringent on other people. They actually have to do... You have to study for a 50-question test or something about America. He didn't ask me anything. We just had like a... You probably are not a citizen.

You might not be. You might want to check it. I got my blue card and everything. I swear. It's all, I am. I got my blue card and everything. I swear. It's all real. All right. Visitor. Pablo, unbelievable set.

You set the bar very high for everybody else. Pablo Pantaleon. It's a great set. He's on Twitter at... Paulo's Pants. Nathan.Driver on Instagram. You guys having fun out there? We have one of the main characters from Duck Dynasty in the audience, ladies and gentlemen.

This is very exciting. A lot of amazing people. Very diverse audience. Put your hands together for your next comedian. Sean Baker. Here we go. Sean Baker. Here he comes. One more time for Sean Baker, everybody.

What's up? Thank you. I was just watching TV with my 11-year-old son at home, and a commercial came on. It was just like a bunch of pretty girls playing volleyball in their bikinis. I swear to God, my son turned to me. He was so serious.

He was like, hey, Dad, am I going to have sex with girls like that someday? I said, I don't think so, son. Your dad's still trying. But don't tell mom. My brother just got married yesterday. We had a rehearsal dinner for him on Friday. It was just like close friends and family, maybe 30 people. Halfway through the dinner, everybody kind of started fucking with him a little bit. They were like, hey, when are you guys going to have some kids? You're next. Even my parents heard. They're like, when are we going to have some grandbabies?

Then my brother and his fiance looked at each other and smiled. They turned back towards the family and they were like, we're trying. And everybody was like, aww. But I was like,

ugh, gross. Because trying just means he's nutting in her. He just told the whole family that he's shooting loads in her and everybody was like, aww. I shot a load in somebody once once I didn't get any awws

I got an aww abortion wow Sean Baker welcome welcome Sean how are you this is very exciting this is the first time we've had one of the Boondock Saints on this show before. Very fun. Welcome, Sean.

Thank you. How are you? I'm doing great. Yeah? Yeah, how are you doing? Good. How long have you been doing stand-up? Three and a half years.

Three and a half years. All of it here in San Diego? Yes. Wow. What do you do for work? I'm a small business owner. I'm a wedding photographer. I have a wedding photography business.

You're a wedding photographer? Yes. Wow, a wedding photographer. I have a wedding photography business. You're a wedding photographer? Yes. Wow, that's incredible. That's the least gay occupation someone's had. Normally, a wedding photographer would be the lead on that. You see a lot of crazy shit at weddings? It's pretty tame, to be honest with you. Just crazy brides.

Brides? Brides, like bridezillas, you know. Right. What's the craziest thing you've seen a bride do? Just leave. Wow. She left right before the ceremony? Yeah, she got ready and everything, hair, makeup, everything was done.

Did you get pictures of her before she left? I got pictures of her walking out, but then I ran to the ceremony site waiting for her to get pictures of her coming back, but that never happened. Holy shit. Did you still get paid? Oh coming back, but that never happened. Holy shit. Did you still get paid? Oh, yeah, I got paid. What did... And I delivered what was up to that point. Did the guy handle it bad?

Was he crying and stuff? Yes. Yeah, it was pretty bad. Did you get pictures of it? It was pretty bad. Were you snapping away? Yeah, did you get a boomerang of him? Yeah, I'm a documentary wedding photographer,

so we captured... I love it. Like, if someone's gonna fall or someone's cutting the cake and the cake's about to fall over, I'm like, I can't wait for that. Did they cut the cake, but did they cut it in between the husband and wife,

like, holding hands right down the middle? Did you still print up the memory book for after the wedding with her leaving and him crying, and then you're like, that'll be $3,000. Hell yeah, Sean. How old's your son? I don't really have a kid.

That is so weird. What is this? It's very bizarre at this point. A lot of liars here. I feel like I should have a kid. If I did have a kid, that would be my attitude. What'd you say? If I did have a kid, that would be my attitude. Thank goodness. Did you really have an abortion or was that a joke too? I almost had to get one one time.

You almost had to get one one time? It was a scare. We were young. You sure she just didn't have it? Have you met Pablo Pantaleon? Yeah, baby. You guys went and had breakfast about 15 years ago?

Not too many women wanted to have sex with me. My goodness. So tell us some honest things about you. What should one know? What are some fun facts about Sean Baker? Fun facts. I mean, like, your life.

Where do you live? What part of San Diego? I'm from New York originally, and I've been living in San Diego now for six years. I'm in South Park. You guys all live here? Yeah, we all know about South Park. Tuesdays, 10.30, Comedy Central.

That's me. All right. So how did you end up here? What made you come here six years ago? My wife almost died of mold in our New York City apartment. Oh. Like, what was the symptoms? Yeah, what color was this mold?

What color was it? Yeah. What was the color? It was black mold. Oh, interesting. The cherry kind, you know? Like, what was your symptoms? That type of mold doesn't follow the rules very well.

No, it does not. What was her symptoms? That kind of mold is a hell of an athlete. What were the symptoms of her mold poisoning? She was exhausted, tired a lot, fatigue? She started to lose her hair, and she lost a lot of weight, which was good at first. I'm not going to lie.

You know what I'm saying? We're on to something good here. And then what? You took on her symptoms? Yeah, and then that started happening to me. Actually, I'm 165.5. This is as much as I've ever weighed. Look at this. Jesus. Good Lord. Incredible.

So what do you do for fun, Sean? Hobbies? I just stand up. Yeah, other than that. I like watching fail videos on YouTube. Fail videos. Like what's some of your favorites? Are you subscribed to the Kids Getting Hurt channel?

You should deeply look into that. I didn't know about that. That's a good one. I'll check that out. Yeah. I've seen the Kids Getting. That's a good one. I'll check that out. Yeah. I've seen the kids getting hurt videos a few times. I saw them with Coach Donnie in them over there. Took me a second.

I had to look up his name again. Just says Jordan High Cougars, Coach Donnie. All right. So you're a liar. Your wife got poisoned by mold. Six years ago you moved here. What made you pick South Park? We moved to Mission Valley at first. We had two dogs, and it was just difficult to move across the country with two dogs.

But this place in Mission Valley let us have them. There was an apartment complex. After that first year I ran out, we liked South Park. You can walk around the neighborhood a little bit. It still has a little bit of a city kind of feel. What's your favorite thing about San Diego? You're looking at a bunch of San Diego natives here. You're originally from New York. His favorite thing about San Diego doesn't have a lot of black mold.

What about you? Your favorite thing? I don't know. Probably the girls. I mean, they're fucking pretty hot. Wow. You're so creepy. But they're just different. They're different than New York girls. You look like that one...

What's that one fucking guy's name from the movie, like, Clue? You know what I mean? Yes, Tim Curry. Very good, sir. Has anyone ever told you you look like Tim Curry? No. Just really that big creepy smile. He was the original It clown.

Yeah, can you say they all float down here? Can you say they all float down here? They all float down here? Yeah, you're scary, dude. I just squirted out my butt a little. You ever commit a crime before? I used to commit a lot of crimes. Like what?

What kind of crime? Like stealing. Yeah, what'd you steal? What have you stolen before? Like when I was in high school, all my friends, we used to work a lot of crimes. Like what? What kind of crime? Like stealing. Yeah, what'd you steal? What have you stolen before? Like when I was in high school, all my friends, we used to work at the mall and we all just stole

from each other's stores that they worked at. Yeah. American Eagle, Macy's. Like how many steals we talking here? Like I came home.

American Eagle, Macy's. All right. Okay, Sean. Does anybody ever told you you look like you haunt golf courses? That's a first. How long have you been rocking that hat for? I got that one. That's a first. How long have you been rocking that hat for?

Eight years or something. Eight years. That's your thing, huh? You like that style. Sometimes. I'll show you guys what's underneath it just so everybody sees. Yeah, we all knew what was underneath it. No one that wears that hat has some beautiful fucking thick... But I can grow hair, but I do choose to shave it, though. He takes off the hat.

He just has fucking thick Brendan Schaub hair, just a fucking glazed-over black blob. All right, Sean. That's incredible. Well, it was nice to meet you. Yeah, Schaub hair. Hashtag Schaub hair for those of you fans of this episode. Does he have good hair?

All right. Put your hands together for Sean Baker, everybody. There he goes. Sean Baker. He's on social media, at SeanBakerZ1. 21? Is that 21? SeanBaker21.

S-H-U-N. You know, let's do it now and then we'll go back a couple times um you know let's do something fun here shall we uh now unfortunately william montgomery of course couldn't make it here tonight he uh he uh has a job that he will not get rid of at a self-storage unit he's been offered other jobs that are more profitable. However, he will not quit that job, and he could not make it here tonight. However, since there have been so many

liars in this episode continuously from beginning to end, that I decided to lie to you, because the biggest liar I've ever met in my life is here. I present to you the regular the biggest liar I've ever met in my life is here. I present to you the regular of Kill Tony, the one and only, William

Montgomery! William! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Crazy for me Wow!

He's coming in on someone else's electric wheelchair! This is comedy history. The greatest entrance in the history of Kill Tony. He saved it for La Jolla. All right, William, I think you can make it. Just jump off. You're close enough. Here he is.

He's here all along. William Montgomery! What's up? I want to give it up for my uncle. We used to work for Exhibit. But seriously, I'm from La Jolla. I grew up by the tide pools. A lot of stagnant water.

But seriously, I've been up for five days on Zantac 75. I have really bad acid reflux. Seriously, I'm from La Jolla. I've been working at a wood fire pizza place. It's called Pizza Hut. It is so nice to be here. I was sick. Two years ago, I had something called strep throat.

I couldn't breathe. When I was swimming in swimming pools, I had speedo goggles. Wow. William Montgomery, you want to finish that? You were sweating in swimming pools? I was sweating in swimming pools. I was sponsored by speedo goggles.

They would fog up like a motherfucker. When I was below 20 feet, I was really holding my breath. That was a point in time I had something called Legionnaire's disease. I was addicted to Zantac 75. Wow. This is a new...

How about one more time for William Montgomery? Hey. So, William, this Zantac 75, this is a whole new thing. Hey, Tony, can you tell the people to do the lights down, please? Okay, can we have a little lighting adjustment here of some kind? Really, any kind?

Michael? Hey, Michael, can you turn these fucking things down? Yeah, no. I was on fucking Zorro. You were on Zorro? What part of Zorro were you? Do y'all remember that movie, Antonio Banderas? Thank you, Michael.

Yeah, I worked for Zorro for three years. It was a very long production. I got sick halfway through. Oh, my goodness. What character were you on Zorro? I was a man named Antonio Banderas. Wait, why would there be a character named Antonio Banderas? I think we're catching you in one of your lies right now, William.

I played his youngest cousin based off of my youngest cousin, Taylor Forstuck. I was taking a bunch of Advil at the time. I was eating a bunch of certs. Why were you taking so many Advil? What did that make you feel like? Because I was making tons of money. I was a really bad gambler at the time. I was going to Sam's Club buying packages of certs.

My buddy who rode me in on his wheelchair earlier, there was a point in time we were both eating certs. He fell out of his chair. I couldn't get him back in the chair. One of the things we noticed here tonight was an incredible, incredible, monumental entrance. You rode in on the back of somebody else's electric wheelchair. We've never seen you do anything like that. We've seen you in a neck brace. We've seen you

in a hazmat suit. We've seen a lot of different things, but we've never seen you. I feel like this was put together. Two weeks ago, I had something called hammer toe. It is a debilitating disease, if you want to call it that. I was having a bunch of unprotected sex in the Philippines.

I got strep throat. I got hammer toe. I got Lyme's disease. I got Legionnaire's disease. I got whooping cough. So how did you convince a man in an electric

wheelchair to... I was on an antibiotic called amoxicillin for five days. It cleared everything up. Other than the hammer toe, I'm currently pretty much debilitated. I was in the bathroom earlier. My Sprite sprayed everywhere. I was wondering if I should clean it up. That's a 7-up.

You're lying. That is a 7-up. It's clearly a 7-up. You're lying. That is a 7-up. It's clearly a 7-up. Let me ask you this. Was it... Did that really happen? I was in the fucking... What are those things called where you go to the bathroom?

I'm kidding. That's a joke bit I'm working on. I'm currently opening up for Cat Stevens, the singer-songwriter. Cat Stevens? Father and son, morning has broken. I swear to God, I become an outdoor firefighter

during my funeral. Can you put on Father and Son, please? What's Father and Son? That's a song? Hey, Michael, turn the fucking lights off. The lights are off. Seriously, Michael, I'm sick of this. For those of you listening to the podcast,

the lights are completely off in the room. Currently, William has rollerblades on. He can't really move his fingers due to his wrist protectors. He seems generally happy. He's been eating butter fingers, you name it, different types of candy bars. He's been

in the bathroom just slipping and falling, not knowing how to roller blade. Alright, William. Hold on a second here. So, earlier you said that you spilled your Sprite, which we see is 7-Up, but is that really true? Did that really happen?

What is really true, two years ago, I started a weed-growing operation in Arkansas on top of the Diamond Fields. Because I noticed that on the toilet, if you go into the men's room, Because I noticed that on the toilet, if you go into the men's room, the first toilet stall on the right, I went in there to use it,

and I noticed there was liquid sort of everywhere. Hey, Red Band, you know what I noticed? The thing you posted on the door that said no blacks. Wait a second. What is going on here? What is going on here? No one did that, William. My aunt is Filipino.

Is that true? Alright. William, is there anything? Why would you say that? You know I didn't do that, William. You're starting to really piss me off. Whoa. You know, like, four weeks ago, you said that was your last episode.

Are you really going to fucking bring this up right now? I've been having fun! You can't just say that's your last episode and keep on coming up. You put that sign up! No, I did not, dude. I saw you do it! You use masking tape! What? You use masking tape!

I would use gorilla tape. You know that. Brian, I mean. My aunt's from the Philippines. William. I have hammer too. My goodness. I can't sleep at night. Are you listing off the tracks of your greatest hits album?

Oh my goodness. Well, William, so much fun again. Thank you all so much. If you all want to come by Pizza Hut later on tonight. Celebrating your last episode, huh? What'd you just fucking say? You heard what I just said. Wow.

Thank you all so much. Want to give it up for Lou Bega. He was a big inspiration. All right, all right. We're getting out of here. There he goes, William Montgomery, everybody. Let's get back to this bucket, huh? How about one more time for William?

Came all the way from Los Angeles. For you guys. For you. It's been a great year, William. Oh, boy. Let's hope this doesn't become a running joke. All right. Pull the name out of the bucket.

Make some noise for Andrew Matney. Andrew Matney. Andrew Matney. I wish you would step back from that ledge. I wish you would step back from that ledge. Step back from that ledge, my motherfucking friend. Here he comes, Andrew Matney, taking his time. Wow, listen to this band. One more

time for Andrew Mattney, everybody. Hi, everyone. I recently asked my wife if she wanted to watch porn together, and she said yes, which I was really excited about at first, but then I realized it was actually a lot of problems with that. Guess who's running the entire

operation? I have to go on these websites and pretend that I didn't write the fucking website myself. Like, I haven't memorized every menu and submenu. You can't just beeline for Bukkake. You gotta pretend like you don't really know what you wanna watch.

Then I gotta decide how long of a porn am I supposed to pick to watch with my wife? 45 minutes? Nobody wants to have sex for 45 minutes. Especially not with me. You wanna have sex with me for 45 minutes? Six minutes?

I could probably last six minutes if I only pretend to watch the porn, but I feel like that sends also a bad message. Like, I'm gonna be very satisfied in six minutes, and she's gonna be really not satisfied in six minutes and ten seconds. Thank you. Fuck yeah. Andrew, keep

that mic in your hand. You got it, yeah. Andrew, fuck yeah. I like your style, man. Look at you. You're like a little grown-ass man. Look at you. Like a fucking little tough guy, but you're built like Danny DeVito. It's incredible.

My goodness. Andrew, welcome. How long have you been doing stand-up? This is my second time ever. Wow! Second time ever. That is so cool. That is so cool. That is so fun. Is that true that this happened? Did you watch porn with your, did you say wife or girlfriend? Wife. I'm married.

How long have you been married for? Five years. Five years. Did you even, at your height, did you even have to get down on one knee to propose or did you just sort of walk right up to her? I was on steps. Oh, okay. Did they put of just walk right up to her? I was on steps. Oh, okay. Did they put you on the top of the cake? Did you use your ring as a hula hoop?

No, that doesn't make sense. It doesn't make sense because he's fat. I throw rings into volcanoes. There's a position open at Johnson County Community College for lead tumbler on the cheerleading team. If you would like, it's yours. Thank you. I appreciate that. I think you'd be great. You could also be the discus that they throw.

So, Andrew, that is so cool. How old are you? I'm 30. I'll be 38. Actually, I turned 38 yesterday. Oh, wow. It was your birthday yesterday, and you almost forgot all about it. You must have had fun, huh? You have some tequila? Wine. Wine? Wine.

I'm seven years older than you? What the fuck is going on here? You guys are built pretty much the same too. That's what we would call in French, la vie. This guy's name is Brown Band. Yeah.

Do you own like a sandwich shop or something? I'm an attorney. Wow. Heck yeah. What kind of attorney are we talking about here? Like corporate securities, corporate fraud. We fight that. So you're a pretty successful guy. It's nice that you still dress so humbly

for how good you're doing. That's so cool. What do you like to do for fun? I have twin 10-year-old girls, so a lot of time with them. Heck yeah. Eight more years until fucking Joelberg's ripping into him. That's exciting. The countdown

has begun. See that guy right there? He only fucks 18-year-olds, so get ready. And he only does twins, too, and he's a goddamn podcast icon. So eight more years, he'll be able to take down whoever he wants. We're going to definitely need some more players on the softball team. Coach Donnie's excited over there.

He wants twins. Have you ever had twins on any of your teams before, Coach Donnie? Always. They're still a little bit weaker than the men but there is two of them so what it helps make it up for it what the power of two twin women is still less than the power of one man. That's just science. I ain't a Scientologist or nothing, but it's just science.

Coach Donnie, I like your style, man. Andrew, do your girls play any sports? Yeah, they play soccer, softball. Oh! Hell yeah! One of them actually won the pitch, pitch, hit, and run competition won the pitch, hit, and run competition. Pitch, hit, and run competition. Coach Donnie would like to give them a full ride.

Heck yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Be careful when you say that. They're underage. Wow, my goodness. It means scholarship. That's incredible. So the one actually wins like softball competitions.

How long until you tell her that she's a lesbian? When she starts rollerblading. I think that's for boys. It's rollerblading and volleyball with the buddies. That's how you know. That is so fun. Those are the only two kids you have? What does your wife do? She sells insurance and also real estate. What ethnicity are you? I can't figure it out.

My dad's side is Lebanese, and my mom's side is Russian and Polish. And I have a great-grandmother from Liverpool, England, so that's what I root for in soccer. Oh, there you go. Heck, yeah. Got to root for somebody. It's interesting that you root for soccer team. You look more like a foosball player than I am. I'm proud

of that one. He's short and stubby for you podcast listeners. So fun. Any other fun hobbies other than raising the girls? You seem like there's something that you do. You like to get away, go to Hooters, grab a beer for your lunch break or something like that. I like to go to stand-up comedy shows a lot. I've seen you

live twice. How were those shows? Unbelievable. You opened for Rogan once. Oh, okay. Was that at the arena here? Yes. Or was that American Comedy Company? 420? I can't remember. May have been. It was a couple of years ago. If it was years ago, then yes. It was at American Comedy Company.

All right, Andrew Matney. That's incredible. You can see me on closed-circuit television in Johnson County in Kansas anytime, just not to drop any credits or anything. Let me ask you this, Andrew. You have a low center of gravity. I sure do. Are there any special sex maneuvers that you do in the bedroom

that maybe you could teach some of the shorter guys in the room or something like that? Yeah, you have to be good at all that kind of stuff when you look like this. Oh, yeah, you could probably do doggy style standing up, right? That's exactly right. She's on all fours. You just walk right up behind her. I have a regular sized wife. But what if you got with a tall woman? What would you do?

Eat her out. Wow, look at that. Oh my goodness. Wow. Wow. All right. You eat a lot of... You good at oral sex? Yes. Really?

Yeah. Can you show us a little example of how you eat pussy? Can you give us an example? Can we have some pussy-eating music of any kind? Really, anything will work Really everything's pussy eating music If you think about it I guess so

That's very aggressive pussy eating music Can we have something a little like softer Yeah this is perfect right here I'm holding a giant dick I'll hold the microphone You just pretend like it's right here Like she's on the top bunk with her legs hanging off. Go ahead.

Keep going. That can't be it, Andrew. You just started. Come on, show us. That was it? Andrew, I was talking about how you do it with your wife, not your 10-year-old daughters. I mean, Jesus.

You can't tease us all like that. Just throw a little finger on it and one little lick. I was expecting so much more from you. Did you forget that he is a lawyer? I don't want to get fired. This did not happen. We're sorry, sir. Golden Pony Productions, not Death Squad, LLC. Thank you. I love that Brian thinks attorneys are like judges

or something. Like we can get in trouble. Oh, sorry, Mr. Attorney Man. Don't come after us. I love it. All right. Well, Andrew, fun times.

I feel like you're going to thinking about running for president in 2024. Am I correct? Have you thought about it? Not anymore. Oh, not anymore. Not until tonight.

Oh, okay. Well, it was nice to meet you, Andrew. Thanks for coming on the show. Very good. For two times, that's incredible. Great performance. Step back on that ledge, my fucking friend. Hey.

What a hilarious tall gentleman. What do you think attorneys do again, Brian? Ah, you know. Sue everybody. That's not how it works. What a great guy, the attorney. All right. I wonder what ethnicity this person is, huh?

Put your hands together for Marcos Martin Ramirez, everybody. Here we go. We are in San Diego, live. California, La Jolla. A lot of people think... Here he is, Marcos Martin Ramirez. Shit. All right, here we go. So, half drunk.

Stop looking at the T-shirt. All right. So, yeah, Marcos Martin Ramirez. I am Puerto Rican. I know I don't look like it. You know, being Puerto Rican, you know, there is a spectrum. You know, we don't all look like David Ortiz, you know, and we're all the way over here to Benicio Del Toro. I understand that. I find

myself somewhere in between, like, if Ricky Martin had a one-night stand with Adam Sandler, you know. I feel that. No, we're on drugs. Speaking of drugs, my father, I've been dealing with this question for years. Was he a doper or was he a genius? Because I come home from school one day and the entire floor was vacuumed, okay, with the Dustbuster, okay. Not a normal Dustbuster, by the way. This was a Ghostbusters fucking backpack accelerator pump. He had removed... Am I done? I'm done?

You had 15 seconds over, man. That's it? Yeah, it happens. Did you know what you signed up for? Have you seen the show before? About yesterday at about 3.30 when I was drunk, I saw the other one and thought I'd just go for it. Wow, you watched all two episodes?

No, one episode, actually. And I saw you with a huge cock doing the drum solo. Yeah, that's right. That was me. And that was great. And I kind of play drums a little bit. Not a lot, but a little bit. Marcos, it's okay. We don't care. Marcos, relax. So how many times have you done stand-up

comedy before? Never. I make good money. Whoa. Look out. Marcos. You should dress like it. Very, very strange. He really looked me dead in the eye. Good work. Good work. Looked me dead in the eye and said that

he makes real money. You really got me there. I mean, the show is sold out. You know that, right? I know, but the tickets were given to me so I just went. That's funny because we literally sold out. So you have a friend that might have more money than you that's just giving away tickets. He didn't have an ID, but he got in.

I mean, I tipped the guy $20. What a rat. My goodness, Marcos, you're burning bridges left and right. This is incredible. You have a lot of inner anger? No, no, no. I punch people for a living, so I'm okay. How do you punch people for a living and make good money?

I paint your parking lots, and you still fuckers can't park in a normal parking spot. Seriously. So how do you punch people for a living? You just said that. Who cares? He's married. My mistress is in the house, Mrs. Ramirez. Wow. My mistress is in the house, Mrs. Ramirez. Dude, she's not...

She's not going to want to claim you after that set. Why do you look like a millionaire who won his wardrobe at Chuck E. Cheese? What were you saying over there, Mrs. Ramirez? She hates the shirt. I'm sorry. Your son has awful fashion sense. Well, he is one of eight. You have eight kids?

I have eight children. Wow. I never would have guessed that. Four boys, four girls. Final scoreboard. That's enough, right? I like that. It's pretty good numbers.

So you said that what? You paint the parking spots that get painted? Yeah. That's like a city job? No. No, it's not city. Graffiti. Who does that type of thing?

Like, I mean, that's the business? That is the business. How long have you been doing that for? Since I was 14. Wow, that's so cool. Is your dad in the business, too? Nope, this Mormon guy that used to hire me. Oh, Coach Donnie?

Started you off at 14? Yep, taking all four girls too. I love it. What part of San Diego do you live in? I've lived all over, but I live in Oceanside. Oceanside, very good. And what do you do for fun? Eat fucking kids, huh? No, I punch people in the good. And what do you do for fun? Eat fucking kids, huh?

No, I punch people in the face. So, like, where do you do that at? Boxing gym? Is that what you're trying to say? You know, I do Muay Thai here and there and some other things. Oh, I do that. By here and there, I asked you, like, if you have any hobbies, and you keep going to this punching people in the face.

Yeah, punch people in the face. Yeah, yeah, because it's the only thing. So, like, when's the last time you did that? Let's talk reality here. Marcos, Martin, Ramirez. When's the last time you punched somebody in the face? I would probably say last Friday night during sparring, getting my guys ready for fights.

Getting your guys ready for fights. What are those? Is this your volleyball crew or something? What are we talking about? No, no, that's this guy's volleyball. That's this guy. That's this guy. So what guys are yours that you're getting ready for fights?

Well, I'm not going to divulge names, but... God damn it, dude. I fucking... We all know legitimate killers, and none of them talk the way you're fucking talking right now. It makes you sound so full of shit, dude. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay, okay, okay.

Very rarely is the drummer the voice of reason, but I couldn't have said it better myself. I just wanted to see how far you were going to go with this whole thing. You're the only one that's been on stage tonight that I wish was lying, but I feel like this is all true. I'm not lying. But the way to say that is that you work out at gyms. No, I'm a sponsor.

You're a sponsor. I'm a sponsor. For fighters. Yeah, for fighters. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. How long have you been doing that for? About two years.

Wow. You seem, like, so excited about it. I'm very excited about it. You're very proud about it. I'm very proud about it. So how hard do you punch? That's a good question. Do you it. So how hard do you punch? That's a good question. Do you pride yourself in how hard you can punch?

Because you yourself don't fight on any level, right? Competitively? Not anymore. Right. You used to fight competitively? Yeah, once you turn 40, it kind of goes the other way. Right. Uh-huh. I guess so, that makes sense I'm sure Mike Tyson feels that way

And Arnold Schwarzenegger I don't know, there's a lot of ripped 40 year olds Or that brokester Joe Rogan The comedian How about street fight? What's the last street fight you got into? Oh, my wife told me not to wear this fucking shirt tonight So I fought her.

She won. She won. Did she win? Yeah, she won. All right. Wow. Marco, so are there any redeeming qualities about you at all? Is there anything?

I can get any one of you girls fucking pregnant any day of the week. I literally have eight kids. Hey, his numbers don't lie. Four boys, four girls. Four boys, four girls. Let's go, Varsity. That's right. Let's go, Varsity.

The weirdest brag ever. I can get any woman in this room pregnant is so bizarre. You know, basically almost any man can do that. Anybody with a ball sack can get someone pregnant. Consensually or not, I will get you pregnant. Yeah, Coach Roy Robinson here, if any woman would like me to dump in them, I'll get you pregnant.

Fucking RBV football rules, huh? Wow. Did you ever, were you ever in any of the military or anything like that? Negative, sir. Negative. What is your PTSD from exactly? My PTSD is from having fucking eight kids, man. Eight kids. Do you know how much it costs to have those little bastards, little fucking millennials, you know?

You ever hit your kids? No, only with boxing gloves. Only with boxing gloves. I hit my son at a t-ball game in 1994. He did not connect with the ball. Wow, Coach Roy, that is... That's how we do it in Kansas. Wow.

All right, Marco. So what do you think, before I let you go, I'll give you one more shot. What do you think is the most likable thing about you? What's something that you can, you know, so that these people, if they ever see you at the grocery store or something like that, so that you leave them with a good memory? Something that they would like to hear. Other than you can get all the women in the room pregnant. We believe that.

Just love each other and punch each other in the face with love. Wow. That is a very interesting theory. Ladies and gentlemen, Marcos Martin Ramirez, everyone. Proof. Proof, if you needed it, that nothing in this show is produced. That literally anybody can sign up and get on this stage. That was truly awful.

What do you guys think? One more time to the bucket? Well, let's hope the next guy's better. Oh, my goodness. Or woman. Have we got a woman up here? Yeah, we haven't got a woman up here. No, we haven't.

But I pulled this name out. Let's see what happens. Put your hands together for Craig Sutton. Craig Sutton. Let's see what happens here. Hey! Everybody's hands go up. One more time for Craig Sutton, everyone.

Oh, my God. Howdy. Hi, guys. Hey, everyone. I have a girlfriend now. Yeah. Oh, so great. I love her so much.

We're great. She's my better half, truly. The only thing is that she's taller than me. She's 6'1". So, honestly, she's my better two-thirds. Let's be real. Makes it kind of awkward to do sexual stuff with such a tall woman. I'm only 5'9". Like, it's hard to be spontaneous. Like, one time we were in my kitchen, started making out. I bent her over the countertop. I took one hand and I bent her over. I took my other hand and I just kind of slowly quietly placed down a step stool.

And I climbed her. I think my favorite thing about having a girlfriend now is it's just great to have a friend that doesn't call me gay all the time. Finally. No, she saves it for special occasions. Like right before I orgasm. That's my time. Thank you.

Craig Sutton. Thank you. I'm going to be honest with you. I had to deal with something while you were doing your set, and I basically missed all of it. But you seem like a really likable guy. Oh, thank you. You seem honest, like a good man.

Like you just don't go around punching things and coming inside of women. Never heard of man. Heck yeah. So welcome to the show, Craig. Thank you. How long have you been doing stand-up? Three years. Three years. And you have a new girlfriend.

Yeah. How long has that been for? Well, not that new. It's been 10 months. 10 months. 10 months. Heck yeah. What does she do? She's a banker. What do you do?

I'm a game designer. Game designer. Have you designed any games that we might recognize? Right now I'm working on Zombies Mode for Black Ops 4. Wow. Look at that. Oh my goodness. That is incredible. Wow, and you didn't even say,

I make good money after you said it. You're not just painting stripes on concrete making all that money. So insecure, Marcos Martín Ramirez. The insecurity was incredible. I make real money. Ouch. Craig Sutton.

So that's so fun. Such a nice guy. What's the worst thing you've ever done? You're like the opposite of the last guy. The thing I think of when ever someone asks me the worst thing, it's always like when I was a little kid, I accidentally stole another kid's toy because I thought it was abandoned. I'm really kind of a sweetie.

We all did that. This man walking through the middle of the room just stole a kid's toy before walking in here. I fucked that up. There you go. Yeah. One trip up on words fucks up an entire vision, Craig. So tell us more about you.

What else? When you're not designing games, what do you like to do for fun when you're not doing stand-up entire vision, Craig. So tell us more about you. What else? When you're not designing games, what do you like to do for fun when you're not doing stand-up? Oh, geez. I'm trying to furnish my apartment better. Give us an example of what you're talking about there.

Like, have you gone to Ikea or something like that? Some backlighting? Yeah. No, it's just like I've been in school for so long, and it's like my first time to live alone, so I have to make my apartment better.

So yeah, like Ikea and dress stores. I'm 33. 33. And when did you start living on your own? Three years ago. Three years ago. Yeah. Right.

And the girl, you don't live with her, right? No, yeah. She's got her own place. Ten months. She's got her own place. Yeah. So three years, you're 33. What's your apartment look like?

Well, it's a one-bedroom, and it's kind of a U-shape. There's a blue couch in it. There's an Ikea coffee table. Do you ever have people over? Very rarely, but yeah. Other than you're the girl you've been seeing, who else comes over your house? Well, I just finished up this improv class, so I have some of those people come over. Oh, no. Not an improv

class. What did you learn at your improv class? Show us. Improvise. Give me a suggestion. Give him a suggestion. Let's see it. Someone in the audience. Give him one. I heard shake weight. Yeah, I heard shake weight, too. Oh, I'm

doing my shake weight. I feel so strong in my too. Oh, I'm doing my shake weight. I feel so strong in my biceps now. I could jerk off the most guys ever. Wow. I failed it. I think you're ready for SNL, dude. Yeah. Craig Sutton.

Yeah, I got nothing in my past that will get me off of that. Really? Is that true? What's the worst thing you've ever said out loud? I said the N-word in a video game one time. In a video game? My God. I know you were into Black Ops. But I didn't know. She's laughing.

I'm guessing it was Grand Theft Auto? What was the game? It was Left 4 Dead. Left 4 Dead? Yeah. There's an N-word in Left 4 Dead? Yeah, I got mad. Someone fucked up my kill, and I called him the N-word.

Oh, my God. What? I don't know what's worse, doing that or admitting it. Also, just for the record, he placed that morally below stealing another kid's toy as a kid. He reminded me. Wow. So you went hard R? Yeah, hard R.

I apologized profusely afterward. I was like, I've never said that before. I don't know what came over me. I'm so sorry. But wait, when you said it, what was it like? Can you describe it for us? Did you feel a swell of power inside of you?

Yeah, it was freeing, but then just for the first second and then I immediately regretted it. Then you felt the guilt, right? Yeah, right afterward. You went hard R2. Everyone knows the N-word. For those of you that don't know, he's talking about neuter. It's the N-word that you're not allowed to say anymore.

Craig Sutton. Very interesting, man. Was the person black? Oh, I doubt it. I don't know. He didn't sound black. He was playing with a seven-year-old kid. It was a white kid from Rhode Island named Tommy.

Yeah. He had to learn. Wow. I mean, to be fair, that's all Xbox Live or any of those video game chats is. It's the most racist

shit ever. It's ridiculous. They called it to me first and I just said it back and I felt bad still. Have you ever been called? What's a thing

you've been called? Oh, dude, no, no. You should, seriously, if you've never done it, just go on Xbox Live for an hour. It is like HBO special in the 80 no. You should if you've never done it, just go on Xbox Live for an hour. It is like HBO special in the 80s.

You know, it's very progressive. My goodness. All right, Craig. Well, thank you so much. Fun times. How do you feel? Is this everything you hoped it would be? Sorry? Is it everything you hoped it would be? Yes, 100%. There you go. Craig Sutton, everybody.

He's on Twitter. Craig P. Sutton. S-U-T-T-O-N. Go up. Hey. Hey. And they stay there. What do you guys think? One more time. Hey, lady. Hey.

All right. We have not guys think one more time? Hey, lady! Alright. We have not had a woman on this stage yet tonight. I'm sure if we go through this bucket slowly and concisely, we can find one. What do you guys think? Should we close the show with a lady?

Is Zan a woman? X-A-N? Is that you? Fuck yeah. Zan Burnay, everybody. The bucket of destiny never lies. It's always honest. Zan Burnay. Two, three. Hey. Yeah. Three. Hey. Yeah. Oh, fuck yeah, everybody. It's your final comedian of the night, and she goes by the name of Zan Bernay.

Hell yeah. Come on, make some noise for Zan, everybody. Hello. So as a kid, I worried about a lot of stuff that just turned out to be totally irrelevant to my adult life, like tetanus, lockdown. Basically, I thought the world was just like full of rusty nails and like I was just gonna fucking get tetanus. But it turns out that no one gets tetanus. I think it might be like a big pharma plot. Scoliosis. I don't know if you guys had to go to the gym and bend over and some creepy ass gym teacher would decide whether or not you needed a fucking brace. And there was always a kid

who like needed secondary screening and they'd come back a week later looking like a fucking transformer and no one ever talked to Ashley again. I worried about amnesia. I don't know. Maybe amnesia is still

a thing. I also worried a lot that I would be wrongfully convicted of a crime that I didn't commit. But that's stupid. I'm white. Wow. That was incredible.

Powerful performance by Zan Burnay. Wow. This is incredible. You are all the woman we could have hoped for to close this show.

For those of you that are just listening to the podcast, Zan Bernay looks like if Roseanne ate Roseanne. She looks like she has an infinite number of cats. I have zero cats. You have zero cats? She looks like she has an infinite number of cats I have zero cats You have zero cats?

Well, you ate them all Come on, man, fuck off We're kidding, Zan, we're kidding We're just joking We get a little roasty here, you're good Getting a little roasty here You can't fuck with Zan I don't know if you've seen her one-hour Netflix special, Evil Genius, but

she will get you. She looks like the sister of a porn star, Rhonda Jeremy. Oh, my goodness. Alright, Zan Pernay. You have a snake skin skirt on, let me just say. My anaconda don't want none.

Zan, that was an amazing performance. How long have you been doing stand-up? This is my sixth time. Whoa! Sixth time. This is incredible. That's awesome. Is this something you've always wanted to do? Kind of, yeah.

It was definitely, you know, You have a real natural knack for it. You stay in the pocket. You're taking these jokes. You're dishing it out. You're taking it. That's incredible for just six times. We had a guy that spent a bunch of money on improv classes up here a minute ago. He could barely answer a question.

Well, Craig was okay. Yeah, no, I know. We're just joking. So, Zan, what made you start stand-up at this point in your life? Yeah, well, I am a partner at a law firm. I work with Andrew over there. We better watch ourselves, everybody. Be careful what you say.

Look out, I'm going to sue you. So fit. So awesome. So, you know, I talk in court a lot and I joke around with my friends a lot and I decided that it was one of the many weird things that I like to do. That is so fucking cool.

Thanks, man. Now what food court is this? I recently did some stand up at a vegan food court. You really did? In New York City St. Mark's Place I signed up for an open mic and it was in the back of a fucking vegan food court.

Wow. Yeah, there were 10 comics and 11 people in the audience. It was amazing. Oh, my goodness. That sounds like hell. Yeah, it was real good. Wow. Suzanne, that is so cool.

What do you like to do for fun? What are your hobbies? You know, like laying on the couch. Oh, yeah. Travel a lot for fun. Hell, yeah. I like to go to couch. Oh, yeah. Travel a lot for fun. Hell yeah. I like to go to Japan. I've been there like five times.

You've been to Japan five times? Yeah, it's the best place. Are you into anime and shit? No, I'm not into anime and shit. What do you like to do when you go over to Japan? Just like buy weird shit. Hold on a second. All I hear is Joel cracking himself up back here.

He's talking shit about me. It's okay. Joel, what are you thinking back here? Come on, just say it. It's my fault. Ask her why she goes to Japan again. Why do you go to Japan? Sumo?

I mean, it's just funny. I'm sorry. I love you. No, I love you. It's okay. I had no idea I was fat. It was weird. I know.

He keeps throwing you under the bus. That's okay. I don't know why he's doing it because... I'm a fancy lawyer. It's okay. I'm going to fucking sue him after this. Oh, shit. That's right.

Defamation of character, Joel. Poor Joel barely has any money to survive. He blacked out. I'm sorry. He blacked out. It's okay. I'm sorry. He blacked out. It's okay. I love it. Wow.

Zan, is there anything else crazy that we should know about you? I don't know. I don't think so. Yeah? You have anybody in your family weird or anything? Well, actually, yes. My uncle is a Kennedy conspiracy theorist. And so he runs a tour in Dallas

at the book depository. You try to talk to him. He's a really great, wonderful guy except that he has a yarn wall basically putting all the pieces together. What is his stance? His stance is that it was

the CIA. That's what everyone thinks. It's not like he's got a wild conspiracy theory, but he actually has a copy of the Zabruder film. Really super interesting guy. Damn, that is interesting. I mean, I feel like that. I don't know if you have a yarn wall.

What's your love life like, Sandy? Right now it's non-existent. You seem like you... I used to really kind of have it going on. But. Hell yeah. I'm a little busy. Hell yeah.

You catfish the shit out of guys sometimes. Sure. I mean, frankly, like, no one's good enough. So. Right. There's that. I love it. I feel like you have a fetish.

Like, like, like. Oh. Like, like you're a furry or something like that. I mean, I get that maybe I come off a little weird. But no, I'm pretty boring. I mean. Bull fucking shit, dude. Let's fucking hang on the couch. There's no doubt that

there's a latex mask and a fucking ball gag. Oh, does that count? Yeah. Oh, okay. Do you have one of those? I mean, maybe. Whoa! Redman knows. She goes to Japan. They do have some weird sex shit there.

Yep. Have you ever done anything crazy in Japan sexually? No, not sexually. I'm trying to see if you're lying or not. I'm not lying. I know you've been dealing with a whole night of liars, but I don't think I've ever been lying. Liars and lawyers all night long. Sometimes the same.

Weird thing is the lawyers have been the honest ones throughout the interview parts. Very backwards episode. Well, Zan, I'll tell you this. I mean, unbelievable presence. So fucking cool. I love it when people started this later on in life and you have a natural knack for it.

Great stuff. Zan Bernay, everybody! She's on social media at halfahotdog. So much fun. Did you guys have fun here tonight, huh? We have a drawing from Ryan J. E. Belt. I'm sure of that. Look at this.

It's coming right at you. You're going to get to see it very first right here. Look at this. It's the drawing from Ryan J. E. Belt. He drew that while you guys were sitting there. That print, well, that's the only print that's not available after the show. All the other prints are. You can get them back there. How about another

hand for Jeremiah Watkins, everybody? Incredible performance. Jeremiah, tell us about what else is going on with you. Yeah, follow me on social media at Jeremiah's Stand-Up. My guest on Jeremiah Wonders is Ron Funches this week and Moshe Kesher's next week after that and then Mark Normand after that with you yeah follow me on social media at jeremiah stand up uh my guest on jeremiah wonders is ron funch this week and moshe kesher's next week after that and then mark normand after that and uh you can get uh the kill tony band calendar up front we'll be happy to sign that and then got some

t-shirts and different stuff like that thanks for the support guys love you there you go how about a hand for the great the one and only coach, Coach Donnie Chromacris, everybody. Very playful episode tonight. What did you think of tonight's episode, Coach Donnie? Well, Tony, since I started teaching women, I don't see this often, but I think you hit it out of the park. Oh, wow. Thank you. How about one more time for the great Joel Burgjul Jimenez, everyone.

The one, the only, Coach Beaver Tits. He's at Mostly Sorry on social media. Anything else, Joel? That's it. I love you guys. Thanks for coming. We love you, too. Don't forget, Kill Tony is continuing on the road.

We go to Dallas next Wednesday, then Sacramento, San Francisco, D.C., Brisbane, Melbourne, and Sydney in October. And we never miss a Monday at the Comedy Store in Los Angeles, including tomorrow with Mark Norman. And that's going to be a lot of fun. And we have a second show sold out here up next. We announced it just a week or two ago, and it sold out immediately

because you guys love us, and we love you. Thank you so much. Red Band? Thanks guys. See you later. We love you. Good night. La Jolla. Thank you. Outro Music