Know Thyself - E46 - Emily Fletcher: Manifest Your Dream Life with Sex Magic & Meditation

Episode Date: May 16, 2023

Meditation expert Emily Fletcher, shares how to use your sexual energy and meditation to manifest the life of your dreams and is launching a new podcast, (https://link.chtbl.com/whythis) Why Isn't Everyone Doing This? Emily actualized her life-long dream of being on Broadway, only to find herself stressed, sick, and unhappy. After some soul searching she found meditation, and in one session was transformed.  Today she shares what meditation actually is and why we can't afford to NOT meditate. She also dives deep on what she calls "pleasure prayer", of harnessing the creative potential of your orgasm to manifest. Emily also shares the lessons she has learned from motherhood, how to achieve harmony in relationship, and why the world is starving for a pleasure revolution. ___________ Timecodes: 0:00 Intro 5:11 From Broadway to Meditation: Becoming Fulfillment  11:00 Loosening the Grip on Our Desires: Stress Less, Accomplish More 17:50 Global Shift to Awakening   23:14 Achieving a Meditative State  27:27 We Can't Afford to NOT Meditate  32:54 Transcending Sexual Shame & Reclaiming Your True Desire 41:20 Using Sexual Energy as Creativity 49:53 Pleasure Prayer: Manifesting with Your Orgasm 57:17 Not Everyone’s Meant to be a Monk 1:01:55 Emily's Vision for a Pleasure Revolution 1:10:25 The Challenges & Rewards of Motherhood 1:16:02 Polarity & Dynamics in Partnership 1:20:39 Why Isn’t Everyone Doing This? 1:25:01 Emily’s Message to Humanity  1:26:20 Conclusion ___________ Emily is the founder of Ziva and the host of the spine-tingling new podcast, Why Isn’t Everyone Doing This? (link.chtbl.com/whythis). She is an international speaker whose superpower is making esoteric tools accessible to a mainstream audience, teaching over 50,000 people meditation and manifesting. Her best-selling book, Stress Less, Accomplish More, debuted at #7 out of all books on Amazon and has been translated into 12 languages. Her work has been featured by The New York Times, Good Morning America and Vogue. She’s taught at Apple, Google and Harvard Business School.  A formerly stressed Broadway performer going gray at 27, Emily was desperate for a solution when she found meditation -- which immediately cured her insomnia and anxiety. Her transformation was so dramatic that she quit acting, went to India, and studied the ancient tools Ziva students swear by today. Over the past three years she has dedicated herself to developing innovative embodiment practices that empower individuals to transmute stress into boundless joy. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/zivameditation/ Ziva Meditation: https://zivameditation.com/podcast Emily's new podcast, Why Isn't Everyone Doing This: https://link.chtbl.com/whythis ___________ Know Thyself Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/knowthyself/ Website: https://www.knowthyself.one Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJ4wglCWTJeWQC0exBalgKg Listen to all episodes on Audio:  Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4FSiemtvZrWesGtO2MqTZ4?si=d389c8dee8fa4026 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/know-thyself/id1633725927 André Duqum Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/andreduqum/ Meraki Media https://merakimedia.com https://www.instagram.com/merakimedia/

When I think about how many minutes of how many days, how many people are spending right now worshipping their worries, it's like travesty. I really thought that I would be happy when I got on Broadway. And then I got on Broadway and three weeks later it was the saddest I'd ever been. And then I found meditation. Stress makes you stupid, sick, and slow. And none of us can afford to be stupid, sick or slow right now. It's almost impossible to discern the purity of what your soul feels around sexuality. because we're so steeped and deliberate conditioning around it.

It's been systematic in almost every culture since the beginning of time of divorcing people from their own divinity. As we learn to listen to our bodies, as we learn to listen to our own desires and stop cutting ourselves off, but actually start to honor the whole thing as holy, the whole thing is divine, then it is true that we start listening to the planet as well.

Hello, beautiful humans. Welcome back to the Know Thyself podcast for every single week. I get the honor. I get the privilege. We get to go on this journey together to know ourselves in the world around us at deeper and deeper levels today. My guest today is very exciting for me because we've been deepening our friendship over the past couple of weeks. And it's really a joy to see what she, the energy and the presence that she brings and infuses the world with. She's a leading expert in meditation for high performers. She is an author of a best-selling book called Stress Less, Accomplished More. She founded Ziva Meditation and the creator of the

Diva technique. And she's taught over 50,000 people how to meditate, which is a very beautiful accomplishment, one of the highest that I could honestly say. And she is a host of the new upcoming podcast, which should be out now called Why Isn't Everyone Doing This? And I'm so blessed to be able to support her on that path and journey. I'm really looking forward to all the magic that is to come with that. This episode today is going to be filled with so many insightful nuggets, hopefully, for you all in terms of meditation. manifestation, how to use sex magic to create the life of your dreams from the inside out. And my guest today, Emily Fletcher, is somebody on a personal that I've been able to really enjoy

her presence. There's that saying that those who know knows who know. Joy knows joy. Stillness knows stillness. And I get to witness Emily walk into any room and instantly raise the vibration inherently with her presence alone. And it's been really beautiful to see that I can feel the embodiment. of her that she walks to walk and what she preaches, she practices because she always has a

smile on her face and she's constantly filled with joy. So Emily, thank you for coming on the show. Am I honored to have you here today. Oh, I'm already crying. That's my most favorite reflection. It's my most favorite mirror is that to be the walking embodiment of that which you are teaching because it's easy to tell other people what to do. It's easy. You're like, hey, y'all should meditate. hey, you should transmute your suffering into joy. But to have that reflected back feels really beautiful. Thank you. Yeah, of course.

And it's such an honor to have you here today. And the first podcast that we're doing in this new studio, it's new set. It's so exciting. Let kick. We just did a beautiful invocation and a blessing. We christened a new beautiful sound bowl. Yeah, you sang into the sound bowl and like really christened in the space. I just moved into a new spot with more nature and a bigger studio.

It's beautiful. Coming together. Yeah. And I wouldn't rather do this with anyone else. I'm really stoked to have you here. Wow. Yeah. And it's also raining and it feels like it's just an auspicious day to like really dive deep into a lot of these topics.

Both of our souls feel a very strong calling to explore, to dive, to know ourselves deeper. And so there's a lot of overlap here within this conversation. Speaking to like the reflection that I gave you, I really do feel that level of embodiment and presence with you. because you can tell when somebody has intellectual knowledge versus somebody that's actually embodied in the practices of meditation and various different movement practices or whatever it may be that allows their nervous system to regulate, that allows them to actually be in the nosis and the knowing of it, not just the intellectual mind. I've heard you say in your book also that, you know, most people are unfortunately living in a

reality where they're walking around as bags of needs looking for fulfillment and to flip it on its head and to actually be a bag of fulfillment looking for needs in the world. And I think that's such a beautiful flip of the script and something that I think we both feel very called to. And so for you, how do you support individuals and how has it been on your journey becoming a bag of fulfillment? I'm sure we can come up with a sexier term for that. Maybe not a bag. I sort of like the irreference of it. Do you want to be a bag in need? Do you want to be a bag of fulfillment? Like you get to choose. So the day we're just like, you know, sacks of bones and blood. Just vessels for this unnameable cosmic intelligence.

But how have I helped people to transition? Yeah, and also more so on your own journey. You know, like becoming in that paradigm switch of becoming fulfilled. In and in of itself, because most people are under the illusion that it's, you know, one day when they'll become happy and stress-free and peaceful, when they attain the job, the career, the relationship, whatever it is. And I think it's powerful. And you teach a lot about manifestation and to utilize your design.

to become a creator, to manifest in your life. But there's also this balance of becoming embodied in not being attached and being completely fulfilled with where you are and where your feet are in this moment. And so if you want to speak to a little bit about your journey coming to that place within yourself. Yeah. I mean, that's the great paradox of manifestation is that it is enthusiastic gratitude for what is right now is actually the fastest path to enthusiastic gratitude for what is on the way.

And so if we can't get to a place of real acceptance and really, real gratitude for what is. It's not fertile soil to plant the seeds of the desires for what you would love to be on the way. And it really requires this paradox of laser sharp, specific, placing the order with the cosmic server at the cosmic restaurant and total and complete detachment from outcome. Because the second that you get into, like you mentioned, what I call I'll be happy when syndrome. I'll be happy when I have a partner. I'll be happy when I have a million dollars. I'll be happy when I have a kid. I'll be happy when this kid gets the F out of my house. I'll be happy when I'm divorced. We just keep moving the finish line. And so the thing is

is our bliss is always only ever found in the right here inside of us and in the right now. And so on my own personal journey, I've always been very ambitious. I've always been very driven. And I really thought that I would be happy when I got on Broadway. Like I told myself that story until I was eight. And then I got on Broadway and three weeks later it was the saddest I'd ever been. And I just thought next show, next boyfriend, next year in the bank account, next agent. And I did that for a decade. And then I started like going gray, getting sick, getting injured, like sucking at my jobs. Even though I'm living the dream on Broadway doing the thing I'd wanted to do since I was a child, I was miserable. And then I found meditation. And I actually took a class. Like my,

the woman sitting next to me in the dressing room was amazing. She was like nailing every every role she played. She was so good at it. And so I went to her teacher. And on the first day of the first class, I was in a different state of consciousness that I had ever been in. I liked it. I slept through the night that night for the first time in 18 months. I then did not get sick for eight and a half years. I stopped going gray. I started enjoying my job again. And I was like, why isn't everyone doing this? And that's not just the story that I tell to promote my upcoming podcast called why isn't everyone doing this. It's legitimate. I am the person when I find something good, I want to shout it from the rooftops. And so it was, at first, it was meditation that allowed me to plug myself into myself, right? It gave me this visceral way to plug into pure being. It gave me the visceral access to this thing that we've always known to be true. Every spiritual text has been teaching it since the beginning of time. What you seek is in you. We know that. The kingdom of heaven is within. We don't need any more spiritual text to tell us what we need are visceral practices to help us find that. And so that's what meditation gave me.

And it did transition me from being like, will you hire me? Will you date me? Will you like me? And I would even be on stage performing. We'd like, please love me. Please love me. And like, let me just get bigger and bigger audiences to validate my need to be fulfilled externally, which is repulsive. Do you know what I mean? Like watching that on stage is repulsive because audiences can feel it. Like they're paying you. You know, they don't want to work. Right? They actually, want to receive. They want to be the recipient of your your ability to plug into the divine. That's what great art is, right? It's an individual expression of divinity flowing through you. It's what great singers, great writers,

great performers are. And so when I finally found meditation, it allowed me to start to be a vessel and start to be a vehicle for fulfillment to be delivered through me. And that revolutionized everything, my performance, my relationships, my relationship with my body, my sleep, my health, all of it. And now there's been many iterations of that. And I had to learn how to give from a place of my own desire, like learning to discern when is it my desire to give and when am I giving out of a place of obligation or codependence or people pleasing. And so it's been, you know, like there's always a new layer. There's always a new level of healing or a new way to know

yourself. But it's been a fun, fun ride. Yeah. And you spoke to you, like you, as you deepened that like self-nosis and finding that fulfillment in your own self, you then become a magnet. Whereas the other way is like being repulsive, you know, where that's that energy where you're actually pushing away where you're grasping onto. But from that place, you actually invite what's meant for you when you find a stillness and peace into your own being and recognize that within yourself. Yeah, because it's like when you trust yourself, you can actually, like, like loosen the death grip on the desire. Because if every day twice a day you're flooding your brain with dopamine and serotonin,

which are bliss chemicals, then it's no longer an intellectual concept. It actually is a physical, biochemical change that happens in your body, that your body now trusts that it can access unlimited fulfillment internally whenever you need. And paradoxically, that is the thing that creates the detachment from the desire.

It's impossible to be in the All Be Happy When syndrome when you are infinitely happy right now. And that is what meditation does for you. It just changes, it moves you from fight or flight and to stay and play. Everybody knows that. But it actually, like, I think no one's talking as much about how meditation can soften the death grip on those desires. And I tell this manifesting story about my son.

He's almost five now. But when he was about two, I wouldn't really give him sugar. I was like pretty draconian about sugar. And so the sweetest thing he had ever eaten was blueberries. And so he was like obsessed with blueberries. And any time he would see them, it would be like, blueberries, blueberries, and one time I was pulling them out. He asked for something.

So I was pulling him out of the refrigerator. And I was trying to put him in his hand, but he wanted them so bad that he was clenching his fist. And he was like, blueberries, blueberries! And he was like crying. And he was so pissed that the blueberries were not already inside of his mouth that he wouldn't open up his hand so that I could give him the blueberries. And so I was like, oh, I think this is such a parable.

because most of us are like a million dollars, a boyfriend, a house in Malibu. And it's like, but we aren't trusting ourselves or trusting that nature actually gave us the desire, that our desires are in fact divinely inspired. We aren't trusting that. We think we have to prove or achieve or work harder. Or we think that we'll be happy once the thing shows up, which just allows us from being happy now. And then it creates more suffering, which creates more distance between the thing and the thing that you're looking to magnetize.

So powerful because you get a reflection in life of who you actually are, not just what you want, right? And so that switch from actually finding and reconciling that energy within you, then you become that open hand that becomes available for the universe, the cosmic waitress to actually deliver the meal, or deliver whatever it is that your desire wants to. And finding that sweet spot, that middle way of, yes, we can't get around having desire and wanting to create things

as part of using our life force energy to bring things from the unmanifest to the manifest. and when you align your desire with nature's desire and like the intelligence of nature and the universe, then things happen much faster and you actually get what you want and you want what you get. And like that middle point is really juicy and it's really exciting. I love that. Get what you want. Want what you get. That's like enthusiastic gratitude for what is. And I love these that also of like aligning your desires with nature's desires. And that's what I teach at Ziva. Like the manifesting that I teach at Ziva, we do it right after the meditation. Right? So you drop into these very powerful altered state of consciousness where your right and left

brains are functioning in unison. You're getting rest that's five times deeper than sleep and you're basically de-exciting the nervous system. So it's like that wave of individuality gets to drop down into the ocean of totality. It gets to remember that there is only one thing and we're all it. So then from that place, from that everythingness, we end the meditation. We start to come back into the left brain waking state individuality, but from that liminal in between space, then we ask the question, what would I love? What would I love right now? And when you do it from that powerful potent place of not quite waking, not quite dreaming, you know, really have that neuroplasticity firing, my theory, which has been proven to be true, is that it's

easier for nature to communicate, like how she wants to use you. It's easier for you to hear what the actual inspired desires are, which is different from an addictive longing. And God bless anyone who's trying to manifest who does not have a daily meditation practice or some way to tap into God. Like, it might be painting for six hours or surfing or, and please do not, I am not saying that painting is meditation. I am certainly not saying that surfing is meditation because they aren't. And I really, like, if I hear you, get on a soapbox for a minute. Like, please, can we all just stop saying that washing dishes is meditation because it's fucking not. It's called washing dishes. I get that you can access

a meditative state when you're washing dishes. You can access a meditative state when you're walking in the woods. Awesome. Not meditation. Like, meditation is where you're accessing a verifiable fourth state of consciousness. And then that state can start to permeate the other 23 hours of the day. But when you manifest from that place, it's so much. easier because if you don't have a means by which to remind yourself that you the fulfillment only exists inside of you then almost all of your longings are addictive more money more jobs more followers more sex more candy more alcohol more booze more pills right we and then and then we're looking to fill an internal void with external substances and that is never effective and we live in a

society where unless you have that conscious choice to actually make that a reality for yourself the modern society in which we live is going to make that very hard for you to actually embody. There's so much noise, constant waves of new information coming into our consciousness every single day that stimuli we're not built for. It's very new to us in the past couple hundred years. And so a line from the Vedas that you said is one of your favorite is that truth waits for eyes unclouded by longing. And that's exactly what you're speaking to, right? Unclouded by longing, where you can actually just be present and then truth can become revealed to you because truth always is. It's always here. Truth is always truth. And you just have to remove the parts of you that are

blocking you from it. Yeah. Thank you for that quote. The truth waits for eyes unclouded by longing. And the beautiful byproduct of that is that if you're meditating every day, then you're actually wiping away the longing from your lens of perception because you're floating your brain and body with that bliss chemistry. So it can't help but make you less attached to any sort of outcome. And so I like to say that it makes you less likely to make a mistake. Right? Because like what's a mistake?

It's a mistake. You took something to be one thing when it was actually something else. It's like you wanted this thing to be the partner, the job, the deal. And like you wanted it to be ABC. It looked like ABC. It dressed like A, B, and C. it told you it was A, B and C, but actually it was D, E and F. And so if we want something to be something bad enough, it's very easy to put on blinders to what is.

And so if you're meditating every day twice a day, you're accessing the very source of fulfillment, which wipes away that longing from the lens of perception, which in turn allows you to see things for what they actually are, which makes you less likely to make a mistake. So if that's all meditation did for you, it would actually be saving you time. because think about how much time you waste cleaning up your mistakes. Now, it doesn't mean you never make a mistake again. It just makes you less likely to make one. Like, you still have your learning in your life syllabus,

but who wants to waste time cleaning up avoidable mistakes? Not me. Me neither. So there is a beautiful, I guess, distinction I love for you to provide in terms of because you've helped so many people, high-performer CEOs, learn meditation, and kind of ask it with the Trojan horse of like, listen, you'll have better sex,

you'll make more money, all that is great. And they're getting the real good, so who cares, right? And for somebody that wants to just, I guess, optimize their reality or kind of have that level of self-improvement, that's one thing. How do you share meditation in a way differently for somebody who wants to know the true nature of their existence? This is such a fascinating question at a fascinating time, because I feel like the whole,

it's like geist, planet, frequency, of the earth, if you will, is shifting from this sort of hyper-driven, hyper-achievement-focused, hyper-accomplishment-focused, more masculine paradigm, into a more feminine paradigm. And that does not mean that the future is female. It means that the future is more feminine, more magnetizing, more receptive, more... Balanced. Balanced. More integrated. And so I very much built my whole business and career on, like, wrapping this powerful medicine of meditation in the candy-coding of more money, better sex. And I feel proud of that, honestly. Like, it is one of my gifts is to translate esoteric concepts to a mainstream audience in a way that is both attractive and accessible. And I would

do it again if I was in that time on the planet again. We're not in that time anymore, right? Not only is the frequency of the planet changing, but the whole freaking world just went through a near-death experience. And nothing will wake, well, it'll either wake people up or make them a lot more stress when you go through a near-death experience. And we're seeing that bifurcation happen now. People who have access to therapy and medicine work and shadow work and meditation, they're ushering themselves and popping off into very high states of consciousness very quickly. I mean, we're saying it in our community. Like people are to turn into sex witches like popcorn. And then on the flip side, people who have not had access to those tools and healing modalities,

we're seeing like really rapid spiraling into depression, anxiety, suicide. And so one of the missions now is like how do we equip, it's like just like we've had a K-shaped economic recovery post-COVID. There's been this case-shaped spiritual recovery. And so now it feels like one of the challenges for, you know, all of us to solve really is how do we equip the people who are evolving really quickly to be able to help the people who are not. Not because one is better than the other, but just like to live in a bifurcated society isn't

fun. It's not nice when we can't find unity points with other people. So now the medicine is different. Like the potency of the medicine that people are willing to take right now is very different than it was when I started in 2009. And so now I just, I have the luxury of not having to wrap things in candy coding anymore and I can just offer the medicine. And that's been really liberating and really exciting because I mean, look, if I'm going to give a talk at Google, it's probably going to be different than if I'm giving a talk in like to anga Canyon to a bunch of my hippie friends, you know? Like I still know my audience. But it's always for me, but like meet people where they are, get them started on the foundational

practice of meditation because without that, without you plugging yourself into the divine every day, it's very hard to install high level software. Like you can't install like the newest Mac operating system on a PC from 1995. It's just a waste of time and it actually stresses out the nervous system. So step one for me always is defrag the hard drive. defrag the brain computer. And then from there, we can install really high-level software. And so I have a beautiful course called Moving Into Mastery, which is basically a year-long curriculum, which has been a fun outlet for me to translate my 16 years of studying the Vedas into these different applicable areas of the life, like mastering your brain, your body, your money,

your relationships, your creativity, your performance. And so that's been one way. And then recently, I've started something called Evidence of Magic. And look, 10 years ago, no way would I put something of my website that had any word on it called magic. I would not have made a video called Evidence of Magic. And this thing, I created it in November. It sold out in two weeks. We thought we were going to sell it in January. And people were like mad at me. They were writing me and be like, your EA told me she was going to save me a spot and she didn't. And like, they were like, tripping over themselves to get into this thing called evidence of magic. And I was like, whoa, world is changing. World is changing. And so the premise of this is basically,

like can we use the most powerful force that we have, which is our creation energy or sexual energy, to create a world and a life that we would really want? So we basically like play games around it. And like each month there's like manifesting games. So point of the story is like everyone still comes through the same like learn to meditate. Like everybody's got to get the foundation. Because then on that beautiful brain hard drive foundation,

foundation, we can go into profound, deep, spiritual, philosophical places. And that journey to see what becomes available to you, like using your sexual energy to amplify your manifestation capabilities and things that we'll be diving down to a little bit later down the road in this podcast is incredible. On the theme of meditation, at what point have you found that people switch from meditation just being something they do once or twice a day to it being something that they are? Like having that quality of meditativeness carried throughout your day, it doesn't mean that you don't do meditation where you have a practice of 10, 20, 30, an hour a day or whatever it is. But that point, you know, after a sustained, consistent aligned

action over a period of time, that frequency starts to be a reality that you start to embody more. And that's when a lot of these things we're talking to about actually receiving what the universe wants for you and magnetizing, you know, the relationships that you truly want, that nature wants for you, that becomes available as you start to develop that presence of meditativeness. Yeah, I'd say it's different for everybody because a lot of people have been running the software for a long time, or at least like immersing themselves in the software. They've been reading the books. They've been, you know, ingesting all the lectures and listening to the podcast. So they get it intellectually. And then the moment that they can like physically, viscerally drop into the unmanifest, it's like, all that backlog of software gets installed. And then they have this big surge in consciousness. And they're like, whoa, I am like, they feel like superheroes. Right. And then some people, have never thought about any of this stuff, never thought about manifesting that all written it off as hooey, and they're just super driven, super, you know, evidence based on the 3D. And then as they start to bit by a bit, start to dance in these other states of consciousness, even without psychedelics,

even without hours of breathwork, they are changing their consciousness every day, twice a day. So you're no longer under the illusion that this is all there is. And so then it's a bit more gradual for most people, but they, I mean, they've had many studies that prove that your brain indelibly changes after eight weeks. And that's just of mindfulness. Just mindfulness. And I'm saying just there on purpose because I'm a meditation snobb. And, um, oh, I'm so snobby about meditation. Um, I also like to call myself the most competitive meditation teacher, which I recognize when an asshole that makes me, but I am doubling down on it. Just kidding, just kidding. Um, no, So mindfulness, just to, you know, get those out of the way.

So Ziva is mindfulness, meditation, and manifesting. So like three M's, that's what I teach. And the difference between mindfulness and meditation is that mindfulness I would define as the art of bringing your awareness into the present moment. Here and now. And you can do that while you're washing dishes or walking in the woods. Full presence. You're not on your phone. You're actively bringing awareness to the sensation of your foot hitting the floor of the forest.

you're actively feeling the temperature of the water on your hands as you wash dishes, intense presence, beautiful, mindfulness. Left brain is online. We're actively focusing on something. A guided visualization, breathwork, visualizing your chakras, putting your energy on different energetic meridians, beautiful, powerful. And I would put those in the mindfulness category, which is different than meditation, or at least the meditation that I teach at Ziva, which is based on something called Nisham Karma Yoga.

union attained by action, hardly taken, lazy man's meditation, lazy person's meditation, excuse me. And so in it, like I said, you're getting rest that's five times deeper than sleep. So you're sort of dropping into these unmanifestates. It looks kind of like this, which does not make for a great Instagram selfie, but it feels amazing. And then from that space, you are more recharge, more awake. you have, you're more awake and therefore more conscious on the other side. And so if you're doing that

every day twice a day, like the rate with which it permeates into the rest of your life is going to be pretty fast. But anyway, I'm just saying there's studies that say that mindfulness can change the brain within eight weeks. I think that how long the full integration takes is dependent on each person, their trauma, their dedication. Are they eating Twinkies for dinner or not? It's great. And those distinctions that, think are really powerful for those that are trying to live in an activated, awakened existence. For me, I've always tried to project out into my future when I'm going to be like in 10, 5, 10, 20, 30, 40 years and to like feel what the opportunity cost of not meditating and not doing

these practices actually is because we all know lots of 70, 80, 90 year olds that have become calloused and buried decrepit. And there's some 70, 80-year-olds that have joy and that childlike energy still alive within them. And we get to choose which path we want to go down by the actions we, you know, take every single day. And so you do an amazing job. And that's why you've been so impactful in the space of making meditation, kind of wrapping that soul food with the eye candy of, you know, all these other benefits that you're going to get, which is great. And I know for myself, like my practices of meditation and various certain things over the years have been because I've had earlier on more of like the seeking energy, this desire, this longing to know. who I am beyond any thought or emotion. And so that journey of discovering who we are beneath all

of that is something that I'm very passionate about, something that you're very passionate about. Is there anything else you want to say on the opportunity cost of not making this a part of your day in life? There's a lot I want to say about it. Please do because we're on a podcast, Emily. Thanks for asking. I mean, the short answer is that if you're not meditating, then you're just going to be stressed and stress makes you stupid sick and slow. Like, sorry, but it does. And none of us can afford to be stupid, sick, or slow right now. Like, the world is literally on fire. Yeah. We do not have time to be stupid, sick, and slow. We need all hands on deck. And we need all hands on deck. There's a reason why you can't find your keys when you're rushing to get out of the door. There's a reason why you can't

find your glasses when you're panicked about where your glasses are when they're sitting right on top of your head because stress makes you stupid, sick, and slow. It takes so much cognitive and physical energy to prepare for a predatory attack, which is what your body goes into when you are stressing unnecessarily. And I've basically dedicated my entire life to eradicating unnecessary suffering. Same. Yeah, like, I get that suffering is part of the human experience. Like, people are going to die and people like your dog is going to be sick and like I get that suffering is part of the human experience and that I am great with and I'm becoming increasingly more great with my own suffering like meaning that I am loving it and accepting it and leaning into it but unnecessary suffering

is just dumb it's just dumb like stress is a solvable problem and people aren't meditating the shit has been around for 6,000 years and like the sleeping pills and the wine and the coffee is not cutting it. Like how many more decades of research do you need to do before you actually give yourself permission to feel good? Before you actually spend the precious time that we have that is available to us to resource yourself versus deplete yourself. Because what I see happening now is like, oh, well, I have one hour between, you know, work and going to bed. Or I'm working two jobs, and I have kids. And I don't want to diminish like the real challenges that people are going through. And it's even more important. You're a single mom. You have two jobs and you have kids. It's

even more important that any minutes in the day that you have to yourself that you're actually replenishing and resourcing yourself and not watching the news, not drinking wine, not eating a sleeve of Oreos and no judgment on any of that stuff. But it's just like anything that's depleting you versus filling you up. Like this is what we want to become increasingly discerning about. And then the good news is that, And to laugh doesn't cost anything. You know, joy, laughter, this is free. Meditation.

Like, you know, I charge for my Ziva course, but there are, but we give scholarships. And there are zillions of YouTube channels, which we can talk about later. Those are guided visualizations, not really meditation, but we can have that chat later. But there are many, many ways to de-stress ourselves and to really putting your feet on the soil. Free. Sex. Free. Sometimes. So it's just really, I would invite people to get so discerning about what truly nourishes you versus what is depleting.

And interestingly for me, like I had a troubled relationship with social media and Instagram. Like I would say if I had an addiction, it was social media. And my coach actually helped me to reframe it. And she was like, well, Emily, like, is that your entertainment? And I was like, oh, I was like, I don't have a TV. I don't watch TV. I don't watch the news. I haven't gone to a movie since I was pregnant.

So I was like, yeah. So I'm on Instagram for 10 or 15 minutes a day. And that's sort of my entertainment. And actually now I don't judge it. And I still do it. But now I'm not judging it as bad or an addiction, which has changed my relationships. And it actually feels nourishing versus depleting.

So interesting frame shift, even though I didn't change the behavior. Our relationship to any phenomenon outside of us, like that's the most important to cultivate. It stems from the place in which we're interacting, right, the consciousness that we're holding within ourselves. We judge so much of what we do and then we continue to attract it at that level of consciousness until we start to transcend that way of being.

And so is there anything you want to speak to as we're moving into some of the more quote-unquote taboo topics that we're going to be diving into, transcending the level of shame and conditioning that we've accumulated either through family, through society, in regards to sexual energy. in regards to being able to move in the direction that you just genuinely want to move into and being okay, being that black sheep in the family, you know, whatever it is. So there's a lot of things that people would judge us for that we take on as self-shame, right? Making money. Making money.

Going to so many different things, right? And that reclamation of what you want, not what other people want, is a process to like shed those voices that aren't yours, like it's a process. It takes time to actually remove and get clear like we were speaking to earlier to be able to develop and have those innocent cognitions and have those moments where you're actually listening and you're getting clarity on reality. So you talked about kind of getting rid of the software and upgrading the hard drive first, right? So and then go into a little bit about, yeah, releasing and letting go a lot of that shame and conditioning that we've accumulated.

So it's almost impossible to discern like what your true, like, the purity of what your soul feels around things like sexuality, because we're so steeped and very, very purposeful, deliberate and relentless conditioning around it. And it's not an accident. It's not a mistake. It's been systematic in almost every culture since the beginning of time of in different ways divorcing people from their own divinity. That you need to go through the church and maybe not even just through the church, but also through the Pope to get to God. And you need to tithe and you need to. And you need to tithe. And you to pay your church, 10% of your earnings to be right with God. And you need to get baptized or christened or circumcised or like whatever the rituals are that we put into place that are like

these barriers to this purity to get to God. And, you know, I am I'm no one's historian on this, but you can see the ways that political organizations and religious organizations have worked together in almost every country since the beginning of time. And my theory here is that people who really have the ability to plug themselves directly into the divine, who know themselves to actually be the frequency of creation itself, of love itself, of, dare I say God itself. And by the way, when I say the word God, I would define that as the collective consciousness of all that is. The collective consciousness of all that is. It's not a white dude with a beard in the sky judging you when you masturbate. Okay. It's the collective consciousness of all that is. Like,

you know, I grew up with white Jesus. Like I was raised Southern Baptist. And so I had like a white sweaty dude in a khaki suit yelling at me, telling me what I was supposed to do with my body since I was born, really. And even at five years old, I was like, that's not it. For me, that's not it. And I remember at five, I went to my mom and I was like, how do we know we're Baptist? She was like, excuse me, five-year-old child? I was like, how do we know we're Baptist? Like, were we born Baptist or like, did we choose it? And she's like, what do you mean?

And I was like, well, your best friend is Buddhist, right? And my mom's best friend was Japanese and she was Buddhist. And my mom was like, yeah. I was like, so that guy, the sweaty dude and the khaki suit, told me that she's going to burn and rot in hell? What? Why are you friends with her? You know what I mean? Like, how could you be friends with someone who's going to burn in rotten hell

when you're, like, hanging out with angels in heaven? Like, I did not compute. And again, I'm five. And much to my mom's credit, she let me go and, like, check out the synagogue and the Church of Latter-day Saints. I mean, there wasn't, like, a great selection in Dallas, C, Florida. But I got to, like, at least try out, like, different flavors of Christianity. Sure.

And what I realized, again, was it, or my, the working model that I came up was that God is a disco ball. and that we're all looking at the same thing. And you're seeing purple and you're seeing green and I'm seeing red, but we're all looking at this same thing. And when we feel separate from that, or when we feel like we have to go through someone to get to that, we're a lot easier to control. But when we start to access that inside of ourselves,

we do trust our own soul. We do trust our own desires. And we will serve that almost above anything else. And so part of my passion in diving into sacred sexuality is because I've seen firsthand again and again this democratization of God where people are like, oh, I am powerful. Oh, I am creative. Like, oh, I do trust my desires. Because if you don't know what you want sexually, it's actually really hard to know what you want in your life. And that good news, as you start to experiment with and listen to what your body is asking for sexually, it becomes a lot easier to be like, oh, this is what I want in my life.

So as far as the shame, I mean, I heard you on like it takes a long time. And I think that it can take a long time because certainly we've had decades and decades and sometimes lifetimes of programming, but I've actually seen it fall away really quickly. You know, like Layla Martin, my best friend and world class, outrageous tantra teacher, every time before she ever facilitates any sort of pleasure practice, she always does some sort of a reclamation. So the first time I ever did what I call pleasure prayer, which she would call sex magic with her. It was mixed gender. It was just seven of us. We were on vacation. And before we went into the practice, all of us individually were like pleasuring ourselves, which I imagine hearing that. If this was me three

years ago, I would be like sweating right now listening to that. But it was, it was brave. And it was edgy, but while we were doing it, all the other six people in the room with deep reverence were yesing. Like, yes, yes, yes, Andre, yes. Like that is for you. Yes, yes, beautiful, yes. And so in minutes, that person got to reclaim their pleasure and all the stories that masturbation is defilement, that it's a sin, that it is shameful, that it's dirty, that you're going to go to hell. I had a, my neighbor told me, he was raised Orthodox Jewish. He said that when he would go to temple, that his rabbi would say they would pull like a group of like preteen boys and they said, when you die, God's going to play a VHS tape. There's like a basically like a video camera,

like a camcorder running and you're going to have to play a VHS tape of every single thing you've ever done in front of everyone you know. basically just shaming them out of pleasuring themselves. How much fear can we install into this person? And like what? Like I'm trying to even understand why anyone gives a flying fuck if someone else pleasures themselves. Like really? Who is it hurting?

What is it destroying? The answer is nothing. The answer is that you are making love. You are increasing the frequency and the vibration and the biochemistry of love within your own body. And it doesn't hurt anyone. It doesn't hurt anyone. And it actually, if done consciously and if directed towards your dreams, and we could talk about like, you know, porn and vibrators and BDS, something, that's like a whole other conversation. But if it's really just about you cultivating and curating your own creation energy, like, that's not hurting anyone.

It's just charging up your own life force. And then you get to spend that life force where you want, on your job, on your home. It's just, it's just energy. That change in perception is so beautiful, so needed, so helpful for people actually moving the needle in terms of their experience of life, from putting sexual energy in this basket of all the conditioning they've accumulated to actually just see how it is one and the same with life force energy. It's what makes you alive. It's why you're here. It's why all of us are here. And so I would love for you just to dive into a little bit more how they actually are one of the same, how our life force energy, sexual energy, is great. creation energy. Yeah. So you probably to make this really tangible, if anyone's ever been through

a breakup, right, you have all this energy, right? You're not like having sex with that person anymore. So you have this sort of buildup of sexual energy. Plus you've got the energy of the heartbreak, which even though that sadness or that mourning or that rage, it can be destructive. It's still energy. And so oftentimes what people will get really, well, they either start drinking a lot, right? So that's destruction destroying itself. Or, you start to channel that into creativity. Adele, Taylor Swift, right? Millions of dollars, multiple Grammy Awards won on the heels of a breakup.

Poetry starts pouring out of us, films. Like how many creative projects have been born, paintings, been born out of breakups. Right? So if we start to see that sexual energy and creative energy are very similar, right? And that's what I'm calling it, like creation energy. And it can create a human or it can, create a painting or create a million dollars, but that it is, it's like the generator. But our hoo-ha, and I use this word hoo-ha, because I can say it on a TED Talk stage, which is

easier than cock or pussy. Because those words are really charged up too, you know, like pussy, this beautiful, divine matrix point for the entire species, we've now co-opted to be the worst insult you could call a human being. Right? So let's all just also examine the deep misogyny in our human language and know that that has conditioned us as well. Like how many people who identify as female don't even want to look at their own bodies because they've been conditioned to think that that's an insult.

So when you start to see that sexual energy is simply creative energy and that, yes, it can, it can create a baby. Like you could create life with it, which is arguably the most divine thing that a human being can do, the most godlike thing that a human can do is create life. And yet every time we orgasm, we don't make a baby. Thank goodness. Again, it'd be real crowded here. We got plenty of people already. And yet, what happens with all that energy? And what if we started to take those orgasmic states where the veil is very thin? And if you, when you ask most people how they feel post-orgasm? And I would invite anyone who's listening to this to do that now. Like, how do you feel moments after you climax? Most people will say expansive, calm, connected, blissful, dissolved into everythingness, pure. You got any?

Those all sound great to me. You got any of an end up to the soup? Complete. Complete. Yeah. I rarely hear people say dirty, wrong, bad, shameful, nasty, gross. Like, that's not. That's not how you feel. That might come later once the conditioning kicks back. Or after like pornography or some sort of use, you have a lot of shame tied to. Sure. And like, look, porn has its own frequency. You know what I mean? I'm talking about right now like pure like you and you. Because the thing about porn and look, again, no judgment here. And I think time and place, but just like eating food, you know, if you're eating veal that is a baby calf that never got to see its mom and it was force fed. and then inhumanely killed, like that is not, like, energetically not serving you. And so same with porn. Like, there can be conscious, beautiful porn where people are opting in and they are paid well and it is done in a way that is respectful to everyone involved.

And there's, like, child trafficking that's, you know, so it's like knowing what we're ingesting and being conscious about that, I think really matters. And I will also say that if people are looking to start to cultivate, like, more sacred sexuality practices and starting to really get to know. the own purity and divinity of their own creation energy, that I might recommend that they take a week or two, like away from vibrators or porn, just to slow things down and to get to know their own energy

and their own timing. Because if you're eating sweet tarts for dinner every night, it's hard to taste like the sweetness of an organic carrot. Yeah. So it's just, again, no judgment, but it's time and place. And if it feels enticing to want to cultivate, curate the, the profundity of this life force energy, then I might recommend like a teeny fast.

Yeah, amazing. So then keep going into that how our creative energy, if we're not using it to create a baby, we can harness it to create whatever the heck we want. Like whatever, if you can learn how to cultivate that energy and aim it in a direction, you'd be so shocked at what can come in

and the speed at which it can come in. And so either if you want to give an example of how you maybe manifested something in your life, with your own sexual energy. Maybe also the difference between if you're a guy or if you're a girl, you know, the difference between orgasm for a guy holding in the actual secretion or semen during orgasm can allow you to retain that life force energy in ways that then you can put into whatever you're creating, whether it's a business, a podcast, a piece of art, music, whatever it is.

Yeah, so in the orgasm front and I mean, you can reference the many, many biohackers out there for like the ratio of this. but I think there is like an optimal range of like ejaculation for men per month. I think it's your age times seven divided by four. I think that's... Great. I don't know the answer to that, but I know that it's like less than every time you orgasm.

That like the optimal amount of ejaculation is less than every time you orgasm. And that with people who identify as male or people who ejaculate, it's like there is like this release of life force that happens. And so if the idea here with using that creation energy as a manifestation tool is that we want to harness and cultivate it and transmute it even. And so there is, and I am, again, I am not a tantra expert. I am not a sex expert. What I am an expert of is transmutation of energy and manifestation and altered states of consciousness. And so there are, and thank goodness there's plenty of amazing teachers out there.

but for men, you don't want to necessarily ejaculate every time if you're trying to build that life force. For women, from my understanding is that it's like the more orgasms, the better, that it makes you smarter, healthier, your immune system is stronger, your skin elasticity is better, like, let it rip. As long as you're not a sex addict or that you're using it to avoid feelings or using it to where it's taking vital energy away from other areas of your life or time away from it, which anything can be a drug. You could kill yourself with water, right? So as long as you're not in that danger zone, then I think it's really like letter rip. But then as far as the manifestation goes, I think it's pretty similar. Like I am, I actually do co-ed retreats. I do co-ed containers

for what I call pleasure prayer. So using your creation energy to manifest, I call that practice pleasure prayer. Actually, basically using your pleasure to pray. And I will do that in, in settings with mixed gender, all genders. And my, my, you know, sex witch friends are like, Emily, this is edgy. This is, they're really going for it. And I don't know if I'm just like blind naivete, or if it's just true that the soul has no gender. The soul has no gender. And when we're doing these practices, it's about you and your soul. It's about you and your dreams. And also, as we usher ourselves into higher and higher states of consciousness, we start to inhabit the duality, the masculine and feminine that's in all of us. You know, like you look at most deities and

there's like many that inhabit, you know, all genders. And so I really, again, like I could be on this podcast in two years and be like, whew, really blow it. Really regretted that decision, but I don't think so. But either way, regardless of your gender, the idea is that you want to, you want to place the order, right? Like, what's the magic wand? What's the dream? And you want to get into a real five senses reality of that. What does that thing look like, taste like, smell like, sound like? You want to submerge yourself into the VR headset of that dream, as if it is happening now. And then you want to examine anything that's keeping you from that. Like what's, is there, do you feel like you're not enough? Do you feel tired? Are you exhausted? Like anything that's keeping you from that

dream in the short term or in the longer, bigger picture. And then we want to clear the channel. Maybe we got to clear the channel. And sometimes that could be a good cry. Sometimes that could be a journal, sometimes that could be raging and hitting the pillow. Sometimes it could just be a primal scream. Like sometimes we just got to like get the junk out so that the vessel and the channel is clear. Then we start to build this charge. We start to build this energy, which, I mean, you could do this on an energetic plane. Like if I got invited to do a TED talk tomorrow on this stuff, I likely would not have an audience touching their hoo-haz. I likely would not have them actually pleasuring themselves. That'd be hilarious to see you try in their reactions.

I was like, surprise, plat-mits. I'd like, I'd like, I'd like, You're masturbating. Ban from the TED stage forever. Or maybe not. Or they're like, revolutionary. That's my prayer. So it is possible to do this stuff on the energetic plane. It's possible to do this just with breath.

I think that it's just very advanced. I think it's harder to cultivate orgasmic levels of energy in the body without touching yourself if you're a beginner. So for most of us, like me, it's like, oh, like actually touching it just creates more. more energy. So we start to build that. We start to let that frequency build in and around the hoo-ha. And I think I did not define that term. Hoo-ha. It is all genders, and it's both the anatomy and the energy center around it. So male, female, transgendered, cisgendered, like, it is, and it's the anatomy and the energy center around it. So when you say heart, you don't actually just mean the thing that's pumping the blood. When people say heart, they mean I have a broken heart.

Now your heart's still pumping blood just fine. What's happening actually is your thymus gland is shrinking and that aches when your heart is broken. So we're speaking around the energy center and the organ itself. So same with hoo-ha. We're talking about the anatomy and the energy center. So we start to build that pleasure, build that charge, and then we let it build all the way up into the heart. And we let that pleasure and that energy circulate around the heart. And the idea here is that we're also embodying the manifestation.

because so many times we manifest from our brain, right? We just hold the vision and we think about it and then we accidentally stress about it and we think about everything in between us and the dream, which just creates more stress. In this case, we're bringing the pleasure of the dream all the way down into our body. It's like we're falling in love and making love to the dream itself. And then we let that pleasure and that energy build all the way up into the head. And at the moment of peak pleasure, at the moment of climax, then we send that energy to the dream, to the manifest. station. It's almost like you're dedicating the energy to the dream. And then the really important part is that afterwards you listen, right, in that post-climactic glow where you are dancing with

the divine, where you have transcended your individuality and remembered your universality, or you have placed that order, then we surrender and we allow that bliss chemistry, that oxytocin, that love chemistry to flow through our bodies and we listen. What would you have me know? what would you have me do? And usually the next step, the next person, the next call, or maybe just a new idea will drop in. So just like shavasana is arguably the most important part of a yoga class, it's where all of the different signals that you've been sending to your brain and that your brain has been sending to your body, that's where they get to integrate, you could argue that that resting period, that listening period is the most important part

of pleasure prayer as well, because that's going to be nature giving you your next assignment. So beautiful. That path of discernment, first off, to recognize and have the cognition that your sexual energy, F harness, can be used for achieving whatever aim you want in life. And also just to enhance a level of vitality and vibrance that you carry within yourself is so beautiful. And then also to be very clear on who and where you share that energy with. Because in Sanskrit, there's this term runanabunda, which is essentially kind of like the energetic resonance that happens anytime you engage with another person or any phenomena around you. So if I wore your clothes, which would be a site in and of itself. I'm just wearing Andre. Who are you wearing, Andre? So if I wore someone else's clothes, that's one level. If we shook hands, that's another level. If we gave a hug, that's another. If we had intercourse, that would be one of the deepest levels of that energetic exchange. And so if you do have the desire, which most people are listening to this, to actually bring forth what your soul is here to bring, if you're not clear on what that is because you have all these

other energies interfering with that, then it's going to be very hard to have that clarity and to develop that within yourself. On the path of tantra and like learning about the different ways that you can utilize your sexual energy to enhance your experience of life, some people, very few choose to go down the path of Ramachari and to cultivate that energy to like build the energy in their spine and to pursue enlightenment, one of my say, to know themselves. at the deepest level possible, which is a beautiful path for those that feel called. And for those that feel called to be in the world and creating things and have sex and develop these relationships, what you're speaking to is so powerful because the potency of

what becomes available to you on the other side of harnessing this energy is like you'll surprise yourself in so many ways of the speed, like we spoke to, the speed of which things can come in when you place that order from the energetic resonance that you want it to come in at and meet you at, and then you surrender and you let go and shavasana and you can see what wants to come in. And maybe it'll be in a greater level of experience than you even could imagine, which is when it gets really fun, you know, because you can think what you want should come in the form of a partnership or in the form of a opportunity or whatever it is. But then it comes in from Lefiel and a completely different manifestation, but it is in alignment with the energetic

resonance that you put out, right? And so the power of what you're speaking to in cultivating that energy, getting clear on what you want, which is a journey in and of itself. And then to use your energy, your sexual energy, your creation energy, your life force energy, whatever you want to call it, to then create the life of your dreams, like we spoke to you from the inside out, is a powerful invitation for the listeners to actually start to explore more. And I think conversations like you're having on your new podcast and conversations that more and more we're starting to see pop up as you are very much an early adopter in the space coming into talking about these things. It's going to be really cool to see the communities, the platforms and conversations that continue

to spring up to empower people to discover the truth about who they are and how they can utilize their sexual energy and life force energy to know themselves to create and to be happy and vibrant. Yeah. So a couple of things I want to underline there. One, I think that regardless of whether or not your monastic or what we would call in India like a householder. Which is such like a, I don't know, it's an unsexy term. It's unsexy, but it's like less than one percent of the world's population that is monastic by nature or like celibate or reclusive by nature. And I actually feel really passionately about this because actually even though less than 1%

of the world's population is monastic by nature, most of the meditation modalities that people are doing or derivations of monastic practices. And it's almost like another version of shaming sex because we're like, even though it's not coming from like a Catholic church that like sex is a sin, it's like, oh, well, if I act more like a monk, then I'll be closer to God. And that's not it. Most monks know that they're reclusive and celibate by the time they're seven. They're like, I got to go. I got to go to the cave. I got my teacher. It's not their preference to have sex. It's not their preference to have a family. It is their preference to be reclusive and celibate. We mess it up and we deny our nature.

When we deny our desires, then those desires become perverted. And the kind of, Catholic Church is a perfect example of this, right? Like, those priests are not meant to be celibate, and so they are taking out their sexual urges and inappropriate places on children, right? There's been well-publicized. How many thousands of cases do we have to have, but we start to really examine this? Like, what if we gave them healthy outlets and changed the doctrine and dogma around that? So it applies both the sexual practices and the meditation practices, because even if you look

at, like, Headspace or Jay Shetty, like two of the most popular meditation brands in the world, J. Shetty is like the only personal brand that has over a billion followers. Headspace, one of the first really early adoption meditation tools, both started by former monks. Right? So we fetishize monks because we think that they're better at meditation than we are. But it's actually just a totally different game. And I actually think it's why so many people think that meditation is hard because they're trying to clear their minds. They're trying to do a style that wasn't made for them. Whereas Ziva, it's a derivation of something that was made for people like us, people with busy minds and busy lives. And so it actually is easier to do. And then the return on investment is higher because you're doing something that was actually

designed for the brain of someone who has a job and kids. Like it's ushering you into different states of consciousness really quickly. And so I think that there's a similar game of telephone going on in both the meditation and the sexual spaces that it's ultimately not serving our highest evolution. And I would love to just clarify those conversations. Like we have these bifurcated communication platforms now. So like let's get the word out there on both. but back to your point of like people are choosing that path of like transmuting that energy

you're using sexual energy as a path to enlightenment or are using that energy to manifest your dreams it's the same modality right you're still cultivating that charge and you're still transmuting it and then you're either sending it directly to God or you're sending it directly to the things you want to manifest on the 3D which is also God also God yeah thank you also God and then the other thing you said about the um getting clear on the dreams is that one of a simple things that that I'd love to share about manifesting is that our job is to get really clear on the what and the why. What do you want and why do you want it? And then the when and the how, not your job. Not your job. And that's hard to release for a lot of people because we want to know how. We want to know when. We want it now. We want it how we want it.

Yeah. But then the how limits the beauty and the magic of the manifestation because we can only really name the how based on our limited human perception of reality. And if we're really playing in the realms of magic, if we're really inviting nature to step in and help us, then like if it's, there's no point in manifesting. If it's just like, I'm going to carry that pillow from that from here to there. If you know you can do it by yourself, then just do it by yourself. It's not manifestation. It's manifestation we start to bring in the big guns. Yeah. Tap into the energy field that is unmanifest and then you get to actually bring it into form and be a co-creator in that space. It's like, I get the image of this like one meme I saw once, like God, funny enough, being like a dude with a beard, but he's like holding a big teddy bear

behind his back and he's taking like a small one away from a child. And this is such a sad thing, like taking a teddy bear away. Don't do that. But you knew what was coming. What could be available to you, then you would find a little bit more comfort in the uncertainty of life. Yes. And I think trusting that your desires are divinely inspired. Right? That nature actually gave you those desires because she wants to make them manifest. And yes, I'm gendering God. as a woman just because it's a little provocative, it's absurd to gender this thing that cannot be named, but until it's less weird to call God her that it is to call him him, I'm going to keep doing it. Thank you, Glenn and Doyle. As you start to see the evidence, I suppose, of becoming

a manifester and actually see it work, you know, when you actually bring things from the unmanifest into reality by virtue of using your life force energy in a harness direction and making it happen. And you get surprises from a connection that comes into your field or an opportunity that comes into a relationship, whatever it is. It's really beautiful. Then you start to realize how much this life is a game. And the limiter is you. It's like, how big can you dream? What is the biggest dream you can dream? So what is your, what is a big dream that you have? Thank you so much for asking because that has been my prayer as of late. If I have just one prayer, it's like, hey nature, like, please help me to play the biggest game that would be fun for the species and fun for me to

play, like the biggest game. Because I don't want to play just the biggest game possible, because I know I'm capable of playing a very big game, but if it's not helping people to have more magic or helping me to have more fun, then like, no thanks. So that's my prayer. So what's the big game that I am playing? When I think about how many minutes, of how many days, of how many people are spending right now worshiping their worries. So let's just do that math for a minute. I was just think about yesterday. We had to approximate how many minutes of how many hours yesterday did you spend worshipping your worries? And I'm not asking you because you're not a great data point. But anyone listening? I'm like, oh, I don't know if I make rent this month. What if my

boyfriend breaks up with me? There's a leak. What if it gets bigger in the roof? I don't know what's happening with the government and the bank collapsed. And like, what if there's another strain of COVID, like the environment, oh, climate change, and like how many hours are we devoting our most valuable assets, which is our time and our attention to the exact thing that we do not want to manifest? When I think about that, it's like travesty. It's a tragedy that we are using this collective gift that we have been given of consciousness for a very precious little amount of time and that we're directing it towards the worst case scenario. And then I think about this work and the profundity of this work and the power and the potency of this work, of giving

people a frame to not only remember to ask themselves what they want, but then how to fuel those dreams with the most creative force that they have. When people start to shift that energy into imagining a world and a planet and a species that we would be proud to hand to future generations, like that to me starts to feel like a really big game. So the original download that came for all of this like I was with my boyfriend and we were celebrating our one year anniversary

in the sacred she gung ground in Santa Fe and for whatever reason we invited this woman we were like going under this tree where we had fallen in love and we invited this woman to come with us. We had just met her and just for some reason it felt important that she was there and she put her hands on me

and when she asked for permission. She was like, And I was like, yeah, and she put her hands on my knees. And she was basically like asking to read my future or energy or whatever. And she's like, that's weird. Like what? She's like, this is my dream. What do you mean?

Just like, this is my dream. She's like, but this is you. It's clearly you. It's not just you. There's lots of other women with you in a circle. You're on a stage. Circular. Oh, it's lights up.

Oh, it's Dallas Cowboy Stadium. I was like, oh, and what was weird is that I had been having that exact vision for like months. I've been having this vision of the stadium with like me in a circle of women facing outward. And then like two weeks later, like the whole run of show just came through. And it was like lights up, Lizzo. And then like people dancing and like building the charge and the joy and the pleasure in their bodies and like collaborating with my dear friends, Lela and Marginna and helping people to clear these blocks, to clear the channel, to place the order to hold the vision. and then 80,000 people building this creation energy in their bodies and climaxing at the same time and holding a collective vision for the species. And for years, I couldn't stop seeing it. And I actually

think that it's the bigness and the audacity of that dream that has so quickly magnetized all of these opportunities and basically like this fire hose of a makeshift PhD in sacred sexuality over the last two years. And in all these opportunities that keep arising. I think it's just like the magnetism, of the, just the absurdity of that dream, really. And since then, I've sort of let go of the container, right? I'm like, it's not, it's not about the stadium. The how and the win. Not the how and the win. Like, even the stadium, right, like is a bit of how. And the when, which I was like 11, 11, 11, 22, Dallas Cow, I was very rigidly attached to the how and the wind. I was like, oh, right, Emily. And so now I'm less attached to the container, but very clear

on that it's liberation through pleasure. Liberation through pleasure. Liberation through because I think that we're so steeped in it. It's so insidious that we don't even really realize how many ways the judgment of our own pleasure has creeped into every area of our lives. Well, I'm not going to order that because that might taste too good. Or I'm not going to, I can't have sex with you right now because I'm too busy. You have to make more money. Right. I'm not going to, I'm not going to get a massage because that's a waste of time. Like we just deprioritize our pleasure. And what I found is when we actually reprioritize it,

everything else happens faster, easier, more fun, and more elegantly than we ever could have imagined. So that's the game I'm playing. Like inviting people to stop worshipping their worries and start worshipping their dreams. I love that. And I'm holding that for you. And it just sounds like such a beautiful vision.

We need desperately on this planet, the oracles and the witches and individuals to put the lights on them into like, what do you guys want? Because a lot of the patriarchal systems that have been in place have gotten us to the point where we're at, which in a lot of ways is beautiful, is great. And there's a lot of suffering. There's a lot of disconnection and a lot of healing and balance needs to come in with the feminine. And so I hold that vision for you. And whatever the how and the when is is kind of irrelevant. But I hear the energy and I feel the resonance of what you're here to bring and co-create. And I'm the biggest cheerleader of

it. Thanks. And one last thing I'll add to that prayer is that as we learn to listen to our bodies, as we learn to listen to our own desires and stop, you know, cutting ourselves off and just only worshiping the brain and the intellect, but I actually start to honor the whole thing as holy, the whole thing is divine. Then I, then it is true that we start listening to the planet as well. Yeah. We start listening to what she wants, to what she needs and honoring the earth in in the ways because we can't honor the earth if we don't know how to honor our own bodies.

Right? And so the hypothesis is that as we heal this relationship with our own bodies that we will also start to heal the relationship with the planet. It's just dissolving that illusion of separateness that we hold on to so dearly. And when you're in that place where you're filled with joy, then you don't have to teach somebody

how they're connected with nature. They just feel it. And from that place, they don't want to destroy it. And it's so ironic because in the West, and I think I've shared this before in the podcast, inherent in the definition of nature, if you look it up online, the definition of nature, it says all plant life animal species as opposed to humans or human creations. It doesn't include humans. No, it separates it. And the definition says that we are separate from nature. Whoa.

Crazy. Interesting. Very. Because I definitely use nature as a synonym for universe or God. Sure. Yeah. Well, that's our definition because that's what we experience and feel. but like the definition that's in, you know, Webster Dictionary.

But that tells you where the mass consciousness level is that right now. Oh, that we're not a part of it. Exactly. Oh, fascinating. All right, well, let's place that order. Let's update that definition. Turns out we are part of nature. And as we hurt her, we hurt ourselves.

Yeah. And as we heal her, we heal ourselves. As we heal ourselves, we heal her. There is on your own journey, also like becoming a mother and having Jasper, which you shared a beautiful video of him playing. It's so ridiculous. It's so good. I would love for you to share a little bit about the journey

of how the childlike energy has become activated in you and play and wonder and curiosity has come online more for you as by virtue of becoming a mother and going through that process. It's so good. It's so good. It's so good. It is the greatest joy and honor of my life

is being his mom. And he is my greatest teacher because he's, I mean, he's honestly, like, legitimately smart and funny and cool, and I love hanging out with him. And I imagine even if that wasn't true, even if I wasn't like super into his personality, he would probably still be my greatest teacher because he's just changing so fast. And so anyone that goes to Burning Man, well, not anyone, but a lot of people who go to Burning Man and certainly me after my first burn, I made a video like 2013 and it was like six things the world could learn from Burning Man. And one of them was like the temporal nature of art and life. And you get Burning Man, it's like you find art sculpture that you like, you better enjoy it because it might burn down the next day. You find someone you're into it's like you better connect now because you're not going to get their number or like call them later or text them later.

There's no cell phones. So it's just like here now, savor it, live here and now. And so with Jasper, it's like every day something dies and every day something new comes online. You know, every day like, okay, well, he doesn't want to. want to do, he doesn't want me to sing to him anymore. I sang to him every night from the day he was born until he was like three and a half. And now he's like, no, mommy, no singing. And so, and like that's heartbreaking and devastating. But now we're reading Harry Potter. We're on chapter five of book two. He's four. I'm very proud. And so it's like the second that one thing dies,

like another new gift comes online. And so it's just this, it's like samsara in real time, creation, maintenance destruction, and because of that, it requires, or it is an opportunity for intense presence. I can only imagine the infinite amount of lessons and reflections that you get from how it allows you to unlock your own childlike wonder and an appreciation and presence for the world. Yeah. And I would offer to any parents, it's like, if you're a single parent or, you know, it's just, it's a lot. It's like having a whole other more than full-time job. And most Most of us have like dual working households. And so it's definitely a lot.

And most of what kids are doing naturally are like wellness practices, right? They're taking a nap. They're playing. They're running around. So instead of being like, oh, I have to like be a mom for three hours and then I have to go to the gym and then I have to meditate and then I have to. It's like just do the things that they're doing. You know, when they're running around the playground, like run around the playground. Like let that be your workout.

You know, when they're napping, like you meditate. When they're resting, you rest. So just as much as possible, rather than seeing separate or more things to do, it's like, how can we infuse the things together or invite them to meditate with you, right? So that we integrate versus like, I don't have time to take care of myself because I'm a parent. Can only imagine how much harder that task would be if you're not meditating. If you don't have these practices that allow you to develop some self-mastery. The other day, like, and I will, I'm proud of myself that I, this is on the first, maybe first,

maybe second time in almost five years that I was like really annoyed with him like he would not clean up his toys and I was like it's time to clean your toys it's time of your toys it's time okay if you don't clean your toys I'm taking the toys away and it was like the 10th effing time I had said it and I was like pissed and I had to like go pack and I was tired I was irritated and then and normally it's like a moment and it passes but I was like mad and I like leaned into it and I started like really like putting my anger on him I mean we're talking like four minutes Yeah, yeah. But it wasn't hits.

It was my anger. It was my frustration. It was me wanting to go and pack. And I put it on him. And then I was like, oh, I'm like, okay. I like handled myself. But then at bedtime, we always play Rosebud Thorn. Which is like, what was the most beautiful part of your day?

What was the outchiest part of your day? And what was the, what's the thing that you're working on? Which highly recommend as a practice, really with your partner or child or anyone or yourself in your journal. We do that in my men's group. And so the fact that you're doing it with your four-year-old son is absolutely beautiful. It's so good. It's so good. And he, I asked him, I was like, you know, what was the thorn? And he was like, you were the thorn. And I was like noted, fair, heard. And I was just, and I just straight up, like, apologize. And I was like, buddy, like, that was not yours. Like, I was feeling angry.

I was feeling frustrated. And I took that out on you. And I'm really, really sorry. And I am gonna, I'm gonna do my, I'm gonna do better next time. And that's my butt. That's the thing that I'm working on. And then the next day, like, told our nanny, he was like, Mommy took her. her anger out on me. And it was okay, though, because she apologized. And so the thing I was so proud of was that he got it. Like the lesson I wanted him to get was that it's not about being perfect. It's about repairing. Like when you mess up, which we're all going to, that we can then repair. And I felt a real proud of that. That's beautiful. That example of like showing him by your actions that it's okay to embrace your imperfections and to like own up to it and that it's okay.

that is probably maybe not something that he'll even consciously remember but it'll be ingrained in his nervous system and his way of being in a way that allows him to have a more joyous experience with less resistance in life so that's beautiful yeah I hope so there's so many beautiful things that we can continue to dive into in this podcast today but I just want to open it up to you in terms of is there anything else in your heart that you feel like you really want to share with this audience with what you're creating I know we can talk a little bit about your podcast which is coming out as well but in regards to anything. Yeah, the podcast is coming up and maybe relationships, like something around.

Like I think it's so interesting what like my partner Adam and I have created and some of the gifts that have come online from like being long distance. Yeah, your partnership is so beautiful. Adam's incredible. Yeah. It's really special. And there's something to like the frequency with which he loves me that I think is real medicine. And like since the moment we met, I'm like, can you please teach men how to love? Because I've never seen anything like it. I've never seen anyone like love the way that he does.

And he spent years actually cultivating the energy of his heart and like built a whole machine, like a vibroacoustic sound bed, this like opus soundbed where he's in, inviting people to get into coherence with themselves and to expand the frequency of their heart. So it's not just like an accident. He's actually cultivated it. And then the fact that he points that at me is really such a gift. But there's something to, like he calls it like the banks of the river because it is not easy to date me. You know, I am a lot, like a lot of directions all the time. And I just want like full freedom and, you know, I'm bossy. And it's just, So I'm a lot of a human.

And so I can imagine that dating me is challenging. And yet he makes it seem effortless and joyous and continues to transmit my judgment into love. And like the way he is like the banks of the river, I think is going to be an important model moving forward as more people start to liberate themselves. And specifically because we've historically been in a sort of patriarchal society and in a sexual container that's been predatory, right, of like, me see what I can get and let me withhold what I can get, like these masculine feminine dynamics, as those start to dissolve and as people start to become more liberated, we're going to have like a new flavor of like wild divine feminine. And my hypothesis is that we might need new models for how do we relate with that. And so I don't have any answers really, but I just feel

grateful that it's happening. We need more male models of what it means to hold a safe container for the feminine, for the world in general. It's just not prevalent at all within leadership currently on the planet. So in interpersonal dynamics, it's so beautiful. When you find that divine union with the partner that you both give each other the safe ground, the banks of the river, and then also the freedom to explore the heights of your consciousness, like the branches' height as to the same degree, the roots go deep. And then you guys get to explore so much in that space of freedom. And that becomes a big catalyst for you to learn more about yourself, to allow yourself and you together to be surprised by life and what wants to come through

you. And I just know that from my own personal experience and from what you have shared in your relationship with Adam, that it's the biggest mirror, the biggest opportunities for growth and the conduit for some of the most amount of pleasure to flow through us. And actually that same woman, the woman who like saw the vision of the stadium, her name's Amanda Gulesby. And she under that tree did an exercise with us where she would have one of us like hold the ground, like just be the roots and just root into the energy so that the other one could energetically just fly and just see what wanted to happen in the cosmos and then we would switch. And so it wasn't even masculine feminine. It was like, and then he would root and I would fly.

And that's been a really beautiful dynamic of like that idea of switching the polarities inside the relationship is something that I feel excited for people to start to play in because I think we get stuck in our roles and our gender roles and our polarity roles and our domestic duty roles and it's like what if we just flip that up a little bit mix that up a little bit?

Even I'm going to make a podcast on the subject of like don't wait to get divorced to co-parent you know like even that like what if you just took a weekend off and then gave your partner a weekend off before you get divorced you know like do that now So, it's just fun to play in those switching dynamics. Wonderful. And now with your new show and podcast that should be out by the time this conversation's out,

what are you really excited to be sharing and not just what you're sharing, but the frequency and the way in which you're sharing, the place that it's coming from within you is really exciting. Being able to see a lot of the birthing process of it has been really beautiful because you're such an articulate expressor of the inner dimension and then also what you're here to bring and share and all these beautiful topics and storytime with Emily. It's so good.

So just touch on a little bit where you're excited to create and weave in that space. Yeah. So it's been so fun and easy and magical. And that's when I feel like, oh, like nature wants this to happen. When it's just like, oh, like even this week, right, we're calling it the podcast Orgy Week because there's a bunch of us in town and we're all just on each other's podcast. But even that.

Blue, Leah, all by. It's like all the crew is coming together. Everyone's going on, everyone's show. It's so fun. And so, like, that for me, like, having a son, like, I can't spend a lot of... I live in New York, and so I fly to L.A. to shoot the show. So the fact that I've been able to shoot, like, 10 episodes in five days is such a gift. And even that level of magic feels awesome.

And so I can feel the transmission happening even through the creation of the show itself. And also, what felt important to me is that it wasn't just sitting... and talking, right? Because I am so expressive. I was on Broadway for 10 years. I was singer, dancer, actress for most of my life. And so I feel excited that we're doing activations before every episode. I bring a guest on and we basically do a mini version of this, of like the pleasure prayer. We're not touching ourselves. Maybe that'll happen later. But we're cultivating that charge. Replacing the order. We're cultivating the charge, clearing the channel, and then dedicating that charge to the dream, even in three minutes. And I love that in each episode you're

going to get to see that transmission happen, but differently for each person. And then oftentimes after the episode, we'll do a bonus where someone actually gets to share the medicine, like share the how like yesterday we did a sound healing and guided visualization. So I led the visualization and Vailana was singing and playing bowls. Aubrey Marcus did a thing where he invited people to change their future by changing their past and led people through an exercise where they actually got to like relive and rewrite a specific memory from their childhood. We've had, you know, it's just there's so much richness, but the transmission that I want people to have, the show is called Why Isn't Everyone Doing This? And twice in my life I've had that.

First was meditation. Second one was when I discovered the sacred sexuality work. And it just, it seems so obvious, so powerful. I'm like, why isn't everyone doing this? This is amazing. And I know that everyone's had their own version of. that. And so to get to interview some of my friends, some of the world's greatest experts, and to share, which is essentially become someone why. If you're going to dedicate your whole life to something, you've likely had that moment. Why isn't everyone doing this? And so to get to ask them that question and then for them to share it with the audience is so fun. I can't wait to see the evolution of it and what it turns into and it feels like a really beautiful seed that

you're planting and it feels very unique in the energy of what it's bringing. So thanks. My, my is that it is entertaining and enlightening. Yes. Entertaining and enlightening. It's already done. I feel that. So good. You guys can check the podcast out, link in description,

as well as before we go on to my last, I guess, question for you. Is there any where else you want to point people or offerings that you have? Yeah. So Ziva Meditation is like the home of all my stuff. So Zivameditation.com slash podcast will actually take people to a really beautiful masterclass in like the neuroscience behind the Ziva technique. so they can get a feel for my teaching and understand like if this thing, we talked a lot about meditation and what it can do for you.

So zivameditation.com slash podcast will take people to a free masterclass so they can make an informed decision about whether or not they want to enroll in Ziva online. And then the podcast is why isn't everyone doing this? It'll be on all podcast platforms. And then we're all over social media at Ziva meditation, Z-I-V-A meditation. Thank you so much. For this last question, if you could tune in, to your channel, to your Oracle.

And imagine that you are given a megaphone to planet Earth. You are in the ears. It's like, what, 16 billion ears that are coming together? A lot of ears. It's a lot of ears. And you have a message that you want to share from your soul. It can be anything. What do you want to share with people?

What reassurance do you want to give? What message would you like? to pass on. The thing I'm hearing is that bliss is your birthright. Bliss is your birthright. That you deserve bliss simply because you were born. It's what you came from and it's what you will return to. And that anything keeping you from that is stress.

So you have an opportunity to transmute the things that are causing suffering so that you can return to your birthright, which is 24-hour-a-day bliss. which does not mean 24-hour-day happiness. It means trusting that everything is working out exactly as it is designed and that your bliss is found right here right now. Bliss is your birth rate. Thank you so much.

Appreciate you coming out on the show. Thank you for having me. Yeah. I'm so excited to continue to develop our friendship and have a party here in a couple days. Have some fun. Introduce the play. We're doing a lot of podcasting. Now we're going to play.

Yeah. Not that we haven't been playing on the podcast. I know. We won't record this one. I mean, you know, it's LA. So it'll be like 45 different Instagram channels going. So good. Thank you for showing up with the presence that you do,

the way in which you infuse your message, that beautiful message that you just shared with the world. And I really just feel the immense amount of impact that you've already had with people and teaching people how to meditate and find that bliss is their birthright and to discover that within themselves, you are a walking permission slip and invitation to a deeper reality.

And so thank you for being you. Thank you for those who know, knows, knows, knows how it is. Thanks for seeing me. I see you. We're just mirrors for each other. Appreciate you. And for everybody that's been tuning into this epic podcast, in my opinion, and I hope that you share that opinion as well.

Like, this sucked. I watched it for two hours and I hated it. That would be impressive, honestly. If you watched it for two hours and didn't like it, like, what are you doing with your time? Living in stress. If you enjoy this podcast episode on Know Theyself, please hit the subscribe button, join us on this journey. We're building an incredible family, incredible community here. Thank you for walking the path. And until next time,