Knowledge Fight - #145: April 2, 2018
Episode Date: April 4, 2018Today, Dan tells Jordan a little bit about what happened on the April 2, 2018 episode of The Alex Jones Show. It's mostly just a quick demonstration that Alex is pathetically and desperately afraid of... a high school kid. Then, your hosts break down the remaining entries in the Alex Jones Drops Bracket. Voting is open now in the Facebook group: Go Home And Tell Your Mother You're Brilliant.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Andy and Kansas, you're on the air. Thanks for holding.
Hello, Alex. I'm a first-time caller. I'm a huge fan. I love your work.
I love you.
Hey, everybody. Welcome back to Knowledge Fight. I'm Dan.
I'm Jordan.
We're a couple dudes like to sit around, drink novelty beverages,
and talk a little bit about Alex Jones.
Indeed, we are, Dan. Dan.
Buh.
Dan.
Buh.
Dan.
Buh.
What's up?
Is there a hug to this?
I know a lot about Alex Jones.
I don't know anything about Alex Jones, and clearly,
you don't know a lot about bringing the heat.
I'm emotionally deflated because I opened the door today,
and Jordan had brought over white claw hard seltzer.
We did the hard seltzer before.
I thought it is a wonderful mix of our novelty beverage
slash alcoholic beverage desires.
I don't know, dude.
This is a dangerous game for Chaboy to be engaged in.
Is it the most dangerous game?
No, that's hunting humans.
Oh, okay.
But it's dangerous, man.
The seltzer game is a real, real dangerous thing for me.
Yeah, I know.
You're a wine cooler fella from way back.
From way back.
From way back.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You could catch me on the street drinking tequiza.
You could catch me out there with the Bartles and James.
You know, I used to fuck with Zima.
Yeah.
You do a little bit of that Spamani, Martini, and Rosti,
Rosti, whatever that is.
Yeah.
I always thought like, oh, what?
This whole smirnoff icing people, that whole phenomenon.
Why is this a punishment?
I love this delicious elixir.
That last part's not true.
No.
But yeah, so anyway, here we are.
We're doing another episode.
Wow.
Wow.
Coming out the gate.
Coming out the gate with energy, Dan.
You know what?
I'm just in a, I'm in a position where I'm still a little bit rough
from our long recording last night.
Right, right, right.
And long editing session afterwards.
And so like, I'm going to get there.
I'm going to get there.
Yeah.
But for now, like immediately.
You're going to raise your game as we go along.
Yeah, immediately.
I've got like a little bit of, I got some rust in the gears.
Right.
So when the performance adrenaline starts to kick in,
you'll be there.
See, that's where I, like today my brain was fucking murdering me.
Like I am dying on the inside, but during the show, man, I got it.
Yeah.
I'm a performer, my friend.
I'm a professional, Dan.
All right.
Let's test your professionalism.
Please don't.
So today we're going to be talking a little bit about the
April 2nd, 2018 episode of Alex's show.
And then we'll have some fun afterwards.
Okay.
But I don't like the way you put that.
Well, the April 1st show everyone was expecting.
Like there was some talk on, on the Facebook group about like,
what's his April fools joke going to be?
And it turns out it's, he made a best of episode and played it on the first.
Right.
So we don't have to talk about that.
But that's hilarious.
But his, his Monday episode here on April 2nd ends up being like
really interesting on a couple levels.
And then really boring for the rest of it.
And I'm going to start off testing your professionalism with an
out of context drop from that episode.
What is he a fag?
Because he knows how to read?
Oh boy.
Dan!
Your professionalism out the window.
Okay.
All right.
Is it, was he being sarcastic or, or like trying to, trying to do that as a,
as a provocateur-ish kind of thing?
No, no, no.
It's a, it's a, like what he perceived people treating him when he was younger
because he was a jock and he wasn't supposed to read things.
So he was sort of saying it in the voice of the people who picked on him.
But still.
Which is really just his own voice.
You know, yelling into his brain.
Yeah.
That, that I understand it.
Recognize.
So on, on this episode, Alex does a lot of talking about how cell phones are going to kill you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So he is a lot of that.
He's doing a lot of talking about everything, but all of the shit that's coming down on him as hard as possible.
More or less.
And then he gets into this.
He starts talking about the Parkland survivors and David Hogg in particular.
Of course.
And.
Because anytime you can yell at a kid, you just got to do it.
Well, in the past, Alex has had like a really awful, but sort of defensible position and like,
Hey, everyone's saying that I said he was a crisis actor.
I didn't.
I just implied it very heavily.
And agreed with people who did say it.
Right.
And so this is where things take a little bit of a turn.
If you, if you, if somebody says David Hogg is a crisis actor and you're like,
Yeah, totally.
That is saying that David Hogg is a crisis actor.
Or I would say like, if I were to say to you, what is a crisis actor mean?
And then you define the term and then me take that definition and apply it to someone without
ever using the word.
Right.
I kind of think that you're saying that.
That's what I'm pretty sure that's exactly what you're saying.
Yeah.
But this is where on this April 2nd show, things take a little bit of a turn.
And Alex's narrative pivots a bit about David Hogg.
And this is truly disgraceful.
Okay.
But the video, and I found a bunch of these this weekend and I saw these last week.
We had an article about it, headline David Hogg caught lying about what happened at the shooting.
And I went and watched him this weekend.
Not just a little clips, but the longer interviews they were part of.
And so it's not a context.
It's not out of context.
Where he says, I was at home when the shooting happened.
So I got on my bike and rode to the school to get as many interviews as I could.
We'll play it in a moment.
He does.
That's a first.
And then he's in all these other interviews.
Saying I was at the school in the class when the shooting started.
And I was with the teacher.
So we heard the shots.
We closed the door.
And then other things where he talked about where he was when the shooting started.
So we got in the closet and they conduct interviews in a closet.
And I'm like, there's no way you're three miles away.
And then you're there and there's the shooting.
So you're in class when the shooting starts.
He closed the door.
So this is a real big problem.
I don't, I don't know what's going on.
Okay.
So there's a video that's been making the rounds on the, the alt-right world and the
Alex Jonesian world and particularly on redstate.com.
So of course it's trustworthy.
This news about an interview with David Hogg from CBS, a CBS piece that they put
together where he says that he got on his bike from his house and went to the school
to shoot interviews.
Now, is this, but how would, no, no, that's not possible for in any direction.
There's no way that if he, if the school shooting were happening and he heard about it,
then it couldn't be happening during the shooting itself.
There was no, I mean, where the, oh, okay.
Okay.
I got to figure that you, you got to tell me more about this.
Okay.
This is infuriated.
It's very simple.
He was talking about the evening.
He was talking about later.
Gotcha.
All right.
All right.
Perfect, perfect.
Alex is pretending that he's talking about like, I was at home and then I went to the
school.
He's talking about after he had already gone home, after the shooting,
he left his house at 6pm.
It's very clear.
The timeline is incredibly consistent throughout all of the interviews that he's given.
There's an interview here at 6pm after the shooting.
I took my camera, got on my bike, I rode in basic twilight and I ride my bike three miles
down winding sidewalks and find my way to the school as I've done in previous years.
All the way I was making sure my camera bag didn't rip open because if you zip it a certain way,
the camera falls out and it would be destroyed.
I start shooting B roll and I see Fox news over there.
I knew I wanted to talk on the news and make sure there was an advocacy,
especially with so many people from the NRA and different gun-toting Americans who watch Fox news.
I went on the day of the shooting and said, quote,
there cannot be another mass shooting.
And I think that's partially why.
But I also, but also other people started saying that at the same time.
I'm looking at the school right now.
You can see bullet holes in the windows.
It's insane.
And the fact that there's more bullet holes in those windows than bills that have been
proposed and passed to save these kids lives is disgusting.
So good line.
Right.
He was at the school when the shooting happened and Alex is taking the CBS thing completely
out of context where he's not saying that during the day he got on his bike, it was that evening.
Right.
Now this is a really big problem because now if Alex is pushing this narrative,
he has to think that he is a completely fake and planted and realized, oh,
shit, I'm supposed to be at work faking being a victim of a crime today.
Right.
And that's why he got on his bike and went to school.
And this is a real, real serious problem.
And if Alex continues down this road, he will be very,
very deeply into the crisis actor bundle or whatever.
Interestingly.
I mean, to what extent does that even fucking matter?
It doesn't.
But I mean, even if, even if this were the case, it's unfortunate.
Look, even if Alex's narrative and these fucking alt-right assholes is 100% correct,
then the school shooting still faking happened.
Well, some people say it didn't.
Well, see, that's, but that's the larger, that's the larger context there is it's unfortunate
if he is saying that he was there whenever he wasn't, but people were there.
Who gives a shit?
He's right.
Interesting.
I don't know.
I don't know how I would address that, but I would say that redstate.com, they retracted
their story and said, quote, I am sorry for the error and have updated the post accordingly.
It appears that the problem was that CBS included a very confusing quote without context.
Not really.
You guys just don't care to find the context.
Right.
You just want to act.
And so anyway, that's super fun.
And here's where Alex goes with it.
I mean, we had an article, I mentioned it,
but I'd already been banned off YouTube or had videos blocked.
Not really.
Misrepresenting what I'd said when I just pointed out there was a stand down.
The students told us that who we had on plus local news.
So they misrepresented what I said and then took the videos down.
And now I realize why they were so scared.
They didn't want anybody actually looking at what went on.
So here's the deal.
They didn't want you looking at it.
David Hogg don't care.
He's a public figure now.
And he's called me cuss word names and a con artist and a fraud.
He's in a man's world.
I haven't done all that.
Yes, you have.
Many times.
And then it came out over the weekend.
And we just reprinted that article.
Thanks.
Paul Joseph Watson found his Reddit and it is David Hogg's Reddit.
It's not.
It might be.
Could be.
And he's there talking about how we, it's good that mosquitoes
are killing millions of people.
Because we need billions to die for depopulation.
And see, that's just the perfect globalist leftist religion.
That's Bill and Melinda Gates.
That's the UN.
That's this whole program.
So he takes this, these two pieces of information
that are both either completely misrepresented or not true.
Like the CBS thing with the, he drove his bike to the school.
There's inconsistencies in his story is just not true.
Right.
The Reddit thing that might be his account.
I don't know.
It's joke.
And that's being willfully misrepresented.
He combines the two of them to be like, of course,
he wants depopulation.
I imagine that these globalists that I'm against,
they also want depopulation.
He's the perfect person for them to have groomed beforehand.
And it's not good.
That's, it's very bad.
That's awful.
That's crisis act.
That's exactly what he's doing.
Again, I'm the only person legitimately calling for white genocide.
Yep.
He should attack you.
Yeah, exactly.
So also on this episode, he gets mad because the Pope,
there's an article about him that said that there wasn't hell.
The hell doesn't exist, which you could take from the scriptures.
If you were going to go with a biblical reading of the scripture,
then yes, he is correct.
So the Pope allegedly gave an interview to a guy named Eugenio Scalfari.
And he said a quote,
they are not punished.
Those who repent obtain God's forgiveness and take their place
among the ranks of those who contemplate him.
But those who do not repent and cannot be forgiven disappear.
A hell doesn't exist.
The disappearance of sinning souls exists.
So that's the quote that Alex gets fucking hot and bothered about.
But I don't think anybody hates the Bible more than Christians.
But hold on, man.
The Vatican denies that this interview even took place.
There's no recording of it.
The guy is notorious for not taking notes.
He's a 93-year-old journalist.
Wait, what?
He's a 93-year-old dude.
And according to The Guardian, this Eugenio Scalfari is quote,
said to pride himself on not taking notes or recording high-profile interviews.
Right.
Right.
That's a weird thing to take pride in.
Yeah.
So the Vatican says-
He prides himself on no one knowing if anything he says is true.
Right.
It's like Michael Wolf or whatever.
The Vatican said that the comments were quote,
the fruit of Scalfari's reconstruction
and not a faithful transcription of the Holy Father's words.
So did he even-
So that kind of suggests that he did do the interview though, right?
Yeah, probably.
But they wouldn't want to confirm that or deny it.
But what they just said was he did do the interview
and he's creating that whole cloth.
Yeah, yeah.
So the Vatican did confirm that-
The Vatican plays games, bro.
All right.
That's a very good point.
Yeah.
That's a very good point.
But the point is that the Vatican is denying that he said these things
and that it's not accurate to their beliefs or Pope Francis' beliefs.
That does not stop Alex from screaming about how he's the devil
for about an hour of the show.
Of course.
Which leads him into talking about how the elites-
Oh no.
They love to do DMT and speak to little beings that they find on the other side.
Now that makes sense.
Finally, somebody bringing some rationality to the story.
They do DMT.
They talk to little beings.
They talk to-
They take DMT in ayahuasca and in their hallucinations,
they get programming and instructions from the other world entities
that are running globalism.
So wait, now the-
Whoa.
Yeah.
This is a new wrinkle for me.
Somewhat.
So the globalists aren't even the bad guys.
No, no.
It's the little beings that they contact on the other side.
Yeah, they're the ones who are coming up with the sort of game plan of the globalists.
Well, then why hasn't Alex been railing against these guys from the beginning?
I don't know, man.
Did he just discover them?
Well, the issue is like, you're stupid because-
Well, yes.
Not you.
No, no, no.
That is true.
Alex, you know, pretends he's super good friends with Joe Rogan
and he is literally the biggest DMT proponent in pop culture.
It's good stuff.
He hosted a documentary about it called The Spirit Molecule.
You know, he's like, he's a big advocate of hallucinogens and-
You know who ran the B-roll on that documentary?
Who's that?
Tiny little beings from the other world.
Probably.
Yeah.
So anyway, Alex says this and it's really funny about DMT stuff.
People think of an alien invasion as in the third dimension from space.
There's dimensions below and above us.
The mathematics show it.
And whether it's real or not,
you have these spirit guides, like Mescalito and all this little goat man.
You know, you're taking DMT and a little goat man shows up.
He's not your buddy, okay?
And-
Well, that's-
He's got a plan though.
You're going to be a god as long as you kill everybody.
Okay, Alex.
Okay.
I do like-
Wait.
The sentence, whether it's real or not, you do have spirit guides.
Right.
I don't know what that even means.
Well, it's that the mathematics proves it.
Whether you believe it or not, whether it's real or not,
I don't know what you're saying.
But I do love the sentence.
If the little goat man comes up to you, he is not your friend.
I do like that.
Okay.
Okay, Alex.
Cool.
I mean, he's a pan?
Is that what's going on here?
Yeah, he's a satyr.
He's a satyr.
Yeah, yeah.
Mr. Tumnus type.
What's your favorite lower dimension?
I like-
I don't know, man.
All right.
What?
You got to work on your two big days.
I don't- I can't think of Kenny Rogers in the first edition.
Wait, that's not a dimension.
That's not really a dimension.
I thought it was going to-
As I started saying the name of the band,
I thought it was going to end in dimension, but it's addition.
Look, man, I'm rough.
All right, all right, all right, all right, right.
Anyway, give me a higher dimension.
Uh, give me a higher dimension.
There you go.
Now we're in it.
So that's it for the second.
It's a pretty boring show otherwise,
except for the warnings about Goatmen,
Alex lying about the Pope,
and Alex launching off on what will become
a potentially slanderous narrative about David Hart.
Because if he goes too far down that road,
it will turn into like your committing libel.
Right.
We'll see.
We'll see.
He's already being sued for that as well, right?
Yeah, I think he's being sued by another guy too now.
Yeah.
Man.
Give us a call, dude.
Oh, you.
No, no, no, no, the guy who's suing him.
I think I read something about him.
He was one of the guys from something or whatever.
I saw an article about the guy who Alex mischaracterized
as the shooter.
Yes.
In a Daniels article that was on Infowars,
is suing Alex.
But I don't think that that's going to work.
I think it's absolutely.
It will if you take the stand then.
No, because I wouldn't testify against him.
Because that's not a crime.
We got to subpoena you.
He just did bad reporting.
The press is protected assuming they're using good faith.
Which he's not ever.
But you can't prove that.
I think we can.
That wouldn't fly in court.
The ability to be like, to say,
Oh, he intentionally did bad work.
It's the same thing.
It's the reason why like slander laws are very difficult.
It's very difficult to prove intent in terms of slander.
Because you want to err on the side of,
Oh, someone made an honest mistake.
And we don't want to punish them for it.
Alex uses and abuses that leeway over and over again.
And this will be another case of that.
This case will be thrown out.
I don't know.
I think if you can establish a pattern of behavior,
then you can.
I think you can generally prove intent in this circumstance.
Maybe it would be difficult.
Now the problem I think there is that you can't improve intent.
You can't prove intent against this guy.
Like you can prove his intent to deceive.
You can prove his intent to distract.
I don't think you can prove that he even gives a shit about this dude.
It would be tough to prove malice directed at a guy he's never met.
Who knows?
Anyway, Jordan, now to the fun.
Okay, good.
We have been promising for a bit now that right around the corner,
we're going to get to the matchups in the drop bracket.
Any moment now.
And I realized, I think I was telling you about this,
one of the jokes and were the reasons like one of the parts of the bit
of my old brackets that I did was I intentionally didn't do them in March
because I thought it was really stupid how so many fucking blogs will do.
Always have a March Madness kind of thing.
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:02,720
And I was lashing out by doing them in like August or whatever,
because bracketing is fun and it doesn't have to be in March.
No, no, no.
You can do it any old time.
So when we started in March, I was like,
I got to push this off into April.
So now we're in April.
Sure, sure.
Say that.
Right.
That's my excuse.
So now we're in April.
And so far, the matchups that we have seen have been from the guest division.
We have Steve Pechenick giving Alex Jones a manor lesson.
Soundly defeating Hamamoto.
Yep.
So that moves on to the next round.
Yes.
And then also we had where Alex, it's time to pray versus Alex saying he has to
leave a rally to go pray.
Yeah.
It's time to pray won that one, right?
Yeah, but it was a lot closer than we expected.
It was a lot closer.
There's a lot of love for the guy in the back of that rally screaming culture.
That is a great one.
Yeah.
That's a good point.
So people showed up for that.
But yes, it's time to pray has made it on to the next round.
And I should say that we are doing this and we will only be going over the first round today.
But I am ready.
The entire first round?
Yes.
All four brackets?
Yep.
All right.
Here we go.
And I am ready to reveal all of the entrants.
Okay.
Now, I will say ahead of time in the course of this podcast that we've done in the last year
and a half or so, we've listened to a lot of clips.
Yeah.
And some things just.
Some from the lower dimension and some from the higher.
Absolutely.
We've talked to goat people.
00:21:23,600 --> 00:21:24,160
You were not.
You know what?
They actually were.
They were very kind.
They're very polite.
They were wonderful people.
Very polite.
They had some bad ideas admittedly, but that doesn't mean that you're not a friendly character.
Right.
I think if I did DMT and I met a goat guy and he was like,
you got to kill people.
I'd be like, I'm going to the hospital.
I am.
I am like, there's something wrong with my subconscious.
Clearly, I'm not going to listen to a hallucination that's telling me to kill people.
That's kind of a hacky, you know?
How, how big, how big do you think is a little goat person?
I would have to assume the standard goat person size would be somewhere near six foot.
So a little goat person would be four, four and a half.
I don't know.
Mr. Tumnus was probably what, like five, six?
I'd dare you.
He was six foot.
He was not six foot.
It's tough to judge because Lucy and Edward were children.
Tiny, right?
And he wasn't that much taller.
Well, that's true, but I think he had a hunch because he was a fucking goat guy.
Well, it's not like he can stand straight up.
Well, I think you have to count that in.
I don't think, I don't think you can.
Look, if you can, if you have a reversible knees, I don't think reversible knees is,
that's the, that's the medical term for it.
Flamingo knee.
Yeah.
To the doctor's college.
Right.
Yeah.
Let's say five.
Let's say five.
Yeah.
Okay.
All right.
A little goat guy, four.
I would say, I would say little goat guy to me, two feet.
Almost, almost pocket sized.
That's tiny goat guy.
Yeah.
I'm thinking like the little goat guy on your shoulder who tells you to kill people.
I think Alex would have specified on that if that was the case.
Right.
So let's get back on fucking track here, bro.
I'm sorry.
You're the one who wanted to do a short episode.
I can't stop thinking about a two foot tall goat guy and how I think he would be cute.
And I would like to keep him in a little bag like a, like a Paris Hilton dog.
Especially if it spoke English.
Oh yeah.
Absolutely.
There'd be a large qualification I'd have for my goat friend.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
So Jordan.
Constantly go to, go into parties.
Like you guys, you guys want to talk to my little goat friend?
Number one seed.
Yes.
Pachanic manor's lesson has moved on to the next round,
but now it is time for us to close out the guest division and reveal what the other entries were.
All right.
Number three seed going up against number two seed.
The number three seed in the guest division is Roger Stone interviewing Rick Derringer's wife.
Jenda, welcome to Infowars.
Thank you very much.
We are so happy to have you here in the studio.
So tell us your take on the real American.
You've got to be very, very proud.
Well, it sounded to 80s to me.
So I told Rick and from then on, he said, it's two 80s.
And then I came up with the idea of having space Odyssey.
Yep.
So.
Yep.
There we go.
Some might think this is a controversial choice to be in the number three seed,
but let me explain why the selection committee put it in there.
I would, I would give that a two.
Here's why it's three.
All right.
You'll, you would see, you will see the two after this.
The number two is very deserving of the number two.
All right.
Even it's possible it should be in the number one spot.
Oh, really?
Pachanic hadn't been so strong.
Yeah.
In the preseason or whatever.
The number three seed, Steve, Roger Stone interviewing, uh, Rick Derringer's wife is,
is deserving of the number three seed for two reasons.
One, it's absurd.
Yes.
Second, because it's.
Cause she claims to come up with, uh, the most important part of that song.
Well, and it's like, it's two 80s.
I'll tell you an 80s second part.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Um, but the reason is because that episode that where Roger interviews Rick Derringer and his wife
is the episode where Jerome Corsi was supposed to reveal all of the stuff that he had learned
that would have gotten him killed.
Oh yeah.
That's right.
And so on the day he's supposed to make that reveal, Alex doesn't show up for work.
Roger Stone shows up half an hour late and then interviews Rick Derringer's wife.
So just for context, that is, that's a solid one.
That is gorgeous.
Yeah.
Unfortunately, it's going up against an incredibly strong competitor.
It's someone we know.
It's someone we've spoken to.
It is Larry.
Oh, it's Larry Dix.
Y'all may not know it, but back when Hillary was first lady, she would go home to weekends
to California, but Linda Budworth, Thomas and, and some of the others, ladies did decided women.
And they were, they went to a church for witches, witches, witches, witches.
Man, do you want your president?
Remember that lady that was trying to run for the Senate?
And sometimes she'd go into some place where they did witch stuff.
Hillary went to a church and worship.
Witches, witches.
Also honorary, honorary mention.
It's the three witches that gets me.
Linda, Linda, Bloodworth, Thomas.
Witches.
Hillary Clinton, Delta Bird.
Witches.
The three witches of designing women.
Honorable mention also to Larry Nichols.
That's actually what the movie Hocus Pocus was based off of.
And the song Hocus Pocus by Focus.
Exactly.
Honorable mention to Larry Nichols.
I wish there was room for all of his stupid comments, but when he's like,
President Obama is about as ready to leave office as I am ready to be a duck.
And I ain't a duck.
I would almost throw in our interview where he says,
now listen, there's hard rice in this soft rice.
I felt like our own stuff and Project Camelot stuff didn't.
Yeah, you can't toss that in there.
No.
So we got Larry Nichols going up against Roger Stone,
featuring Rick Derringer's wife, rounding out the four seeds of the guest division.
Very exciting stuff.
Gonna tell you something?
The natural lime?
Good stuff.
Good stuff.
Good stuff.
I'll get there in a moment.
I'm all about it.
So the praying clips that Alex has done.
Yes.
Those come from the religious division.
Right.
So there's four seeds in the religious division.
And it's time to pray.
He's already moved on the one seed.
And here are the other entries from that.
Now, you know, we have Alex in two clips saying,
it's time to pray.
I got to leave this fucking place to pray.
And so it might surprise you that the,
the number three seed, I got my,
You got your, you got your eyes a little crossed.
Got my seeds wrong.
So the number three seed, Alex Jones reveals that he, in fact,
does not pray every day.
I pray many times a week.
I wouldn't say every day, but four or five times a week.
And it seems to help me.
Great.
Strong, strong review of prayer.
It seems to help me.
Now the selection committee believed that that deserved.
Is that an Amazon review?
Yeah.
I think three stars.
Four out of five stars.
Right, right.
Four or five stars a week.
The, that deserved a place according to the selection committee
because of how contradictory it is to all the other prayer clips.
But that will be going up against the number two seed.
Also, is it like, does he think he's still bragging
about doing it four or five times a week?
I think he is.
I think he is still like, Hey, listen, I don't do it every day.
I still do it four or five times, which is better than you, asshole.
You know how easy it is to pray.
I just did it.
No, no.
Yeah.
I can't anymore.
My, my little goat friend says, oh no, I know it's rough.
How big is that goat?
It's about two feet.
Okay.
It's a tiny little goat boy.
Like a little Jim Brewer.
Like a little Jim Brewer.
So that will be going out.
Now a little Jim Brewer, definitely not your friend.
No, no, no, no, and has bad plans for you.
So that will be going up against this, the number two seed.
I can't help it.
I had a headache.
I was upset until I called the pub devil or spur and now I feel better.
No, that one, that one's number one seed.
I'm, I'm picking that one to go to the semis.
That's not better than it's time.
Oh, that's so good though.
I didn't, oh, that's true.
That's true.
This is so crazy.
Red alert.
I don't know.
Red alert.
Come on.
I, I, I didn't feel better until I called the pope a devil.
Is a great line.
I had a headache and then I called the pope the devil worshiper and, uh, oh boy.
But that means that suggests that calling the pope a devil worshiper
can heal you much like Jesus.
Yeah.
It's therapeutic.
Yeah.
In some way.
I don't know.
I don't know.
We'll see.
We'll see what people think.
I think that that's a pretty even, and who are we kidding?
That's going to be.
Oh, absolutely.
That's going to beat the number three seed.
Oh, for sure.
I'm telling you, I'm picking that one to go far.
All right.
We'll see.
We'll see how the people vote.
So in the next, uh, in the next, uh, division that we've got,
we've got two more divisions, uh, because this is a 16 seed bracket.
Right.
So now we've met all of the guest clips and all of the religious clips.
And that brings us to the next division, Alex swearing.
Okay.
So in this, uh, first matchup from the Alex swearing division,
the one versus the four, this is the four seed, uh, where he talks about piss.
You're a big old bucket of rotten milk.
Somebody pissed down.
Excuse me.
You'll notice we're going to get four straight.
Excuse me.
Is that right?
You will notice.
We're going to get a lot of excuse me.
I think all of these do end in him saying excuse me.
So that should, this, this should be literally no surprise to anybody.
It's going up against number one seed.
Fill your hand.
Adam shift.
Hell yeah.
I'm not against gay people.
Okay.
I love them.
They're great folks.
But shift looks like the art type, archetypal cocksucker with those little deer in the
headlight eyes and all his stuff.
And there's something about this fairy hopping around, bossing everybody around,
trying to intimidate people like me and you.
I want to tell congressman shift and all the rest of them, hey, listen asshole,
quit saying Roger and I, and I don't mean, I never used cussing in 22 years,
but the gloves are off.
Listen, you son of a bitch.
What the fuck's your problem?
You want to sit here and say that I'm a goddamn fucking Russian.
You get in my face with that.
I'll beat your goddamn ass.
You son of a bitch.
Piece of shit.
Shit.
You fucking goddamn fucker.
Listen, fuckhead.
You have fucking crossed the line.
Get that through your goddamn fucking head.
Stop pushing your shit.
You're the people that have fucked this country over and gang raped the shit out of it and
lost an election.
So stop shooting your mouth off, claiming I'm the enemy.
You got that?
You goddamn son of a bitch.
Fill your hand.
I'm sorry, but I'm done.
You start calling me a foreign agent.
Those are fucking fighting words.
Excuse me.
Yeah.
Excuse me.
Love it.
Got to end with the excuse me.
I mean that from the first moment we heard it, it's like that is poetry.
That is.
Is it?
Yeah, to me.
You goddamn fucker.
You son of a bitch.
You son of a bitch.
You piece of shit calling me a Russian.
Fill your hand.
You goddamn fuckhead.
I mean, it's talking.
You fucking, that's not what you fucking say to me.
It brought fill your hand into our lives.
Fill your hand has changed our lives.
There's so much going on there.
And the, I mean, it's over a minute of him screaming obscenity at Adam Schiff.
It's, it's tough.
Poorly, poorly.
Very poorly.
Really, but he's really bad at swearing.
It's tough, man.
It's tough for anything to be a number one seed when that is in the consideration,
when that's in the game in the swearing section.
Like, I don't know what you're going to do.
The number two seed, I think, might have a chance.
You know what?
I'm going to, I'm not going to lie.
I think that one, I don't think that one is going to go that far.
Oh, we'll see.
I don't, I don't think that one's going to go that far.
I do not think it's going to get beat by your butt, bucket of rotten piss.
No, absolutely not.
No, whatever.
So that's the first matchup.
That's the number one versus the number four seed.
And that brings us to the number two versus number three seed.
Here's the number three seed.
Who's banned?
Conservatives are banned, bitches.
That's not the best, but it's fun because of the bitches.
Yeah.
You know, like, because it doesn't feel like Alex who you're like,
Conservatives are banned, bitch.
That's not, that's not how I think of him.
It's almost, it's almost the opposite of the way that you would say that.
Like that seems to me like something I would say when Conservatives,
I'd be like, Conservatives are banned, bitches.
Like that kind of a thing.
Right, right.
I don't know that that's going up against number two seed and swearing division.
And I think that this has a chance to unseat, fill your hand.
Okay.
Adam Schiff.
But that is because this, this is profound.
And this is of course, from a very drunk, special report that Alex did.
Through America.
Globalism.
No American flags.
Hey, America first is bad.
Oh, by the way, would you ever say America?
Okay.
Oh, God, this guy wants to hurt America.
I mean, what a load of shit.
I mean, I've never heard such shit in my fucking life.
Okay.
This cocksucker.
It's wound up with his shit to go on here and spew this fucking filth in us.
We're all trying to just have a fucking life, you piece of shit.
Fuck you.
Goddamn piece of shit.
God, I've never seen you fucking nice.
Excuse me.
Yeah.
Excuse me.
See, now the reason that I think that that has the potential to eclipse the fill your hand
clip is because like there is so much more real anger there.
I think now I think he was doing his Dianne Feinstein impression, right?
That's what he was doing there.
Yes, absolutely.
We got, we got an impression and that's big.
No, I think it was Cuomo.
Was it Cuomo from CNN?
Halfway thinking it was Bernie again.
Hey, Woody, I got my ghoul.
I know.
I was like, did his Bernie turn into an Italian mafia Don?
What's going on here?
I'm not sure what to tell you, but I will say, I think, I think the, like, I don't think,
especially, I mean, from the time that we've been doing it, we don't have any other clips
of Alex just directly saying, fuck you.
Yeah.
And that's pretty wild.
Yeah.
Because that's direct and, you know, whereas,
man, I mean, that's some, that's some, that's some championships wearing right there.
It's, yeah.
And at the same time, it's amazing how bad he is at it.
Like fucking piece of shit.
Fuck it.
Like, like the drunk guy at a bar that makes you fit.
I swear so much.
But if I was at a bar with a guy swearing like that, I'd be like, oh, come on, man, grow up.
Yeah.
Like that's the immediate reaction I have to that is like, oh, what are you doing?
Are you a child?
Are you a child?
I mean, that's what we're ending up, sort of, to the conclusion.
I mean, once we finish this podcast and we decide to move on to something else,
the conclusion we're going to end up to is Alex is in a tragic state of delayed adolescence.
Yeah.
Like that's what's going on.
Permanent adolescence.
His behavior is that of a child.
It's a petulant little child.
That's why he doesn't understand anything.
He's Lenny.
It's why he doesn't understand anything he reads.
Yeah.
We got to fucking tell him about the rabbits.
Oh, man.
You know what I'm saying?
That'd be brutal.
Thankfully he can't read that book so he doesn't get the reference.
Otherwise he'd be really mad at us.
So, Jordan, that brings us to our last division.
The Four Seeds.
In this last division, it was incredibly difficult to figure out how this should be laid out.
And so I decided...
Yeah.
What's our...
Are you going to do a potpourri?
It is.
It is a miscellaneous section because there were some other thoughts I had,
but legitimately the idea of the amount of work it would take to do a 32C bracket,
it's just beyond what I have bandwidth for at this point.
So here we are.
We have these Four Seeds in the miscellaneous section.
And we will start with the number four versus the number one seed.
Here is the number four seed in the miscellaneous section.
I got me a rock and roll band.
It's free for all.
I got me a radio show, TV show, with 20 million listeners and viewers a week.
It's free for all.
Yeah.
Got me a rock and roll band.
I don't know how to seed the miscellaneous.
I'm interested to see how you seeded it because that to me is gold, my friend.
It's gold.
I got me a rock and roll band.
It's gold as a drop.
I tried to weigh the drop versus weird clip.
It's difficult.
And that is sort of standing in place with a lot of the other times he sang.
I think that's the best example of him singing something because it's immediately unclear
that he's trying to sing a Ted Nugent song.
Is that how Ted Nugent sounds?
I don't think it is.
No, it is not.
He sounds a lot worse.
Oh, let me ask you a question, Dan.
Do you bring back our ludicrous?
No.
No, I should have.
I feel like that one's in there.
We got a whole YouTube video out of there.
I know, but it's too one of our amazing listeners spliced it in.
It's too regular.
He says it all the time that did think about that.
But he doesn't do that.
He doesn't sing free for all the time.
No, that's true.
He does.
He goes, oh, what about them TVs, bitch?
Tell me that.
That could have gone in the cursing section.
Yeah, but the rhythm of it.
The rhythm of it was perfect.
Yeah.
You think that's not how I feel?
You think I don't have that belief?
If I had this all to do over, I probably would have an entire section of singing.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
That would be a delight.
Also, well pointed out in the chat room, also the strong embellishment of his listener numbers.
20 million a week.
It's free for all.
It's free for all.
Shut up.
So anyway, this next, the number one seed is actually two clips.
I would also have said if you had more time, I would have gone with an impression bracket.
Yeah, but it would all be for Bernie.
I feel like that's actually grandfathered in the same way that a lot of the stuff
in the, like go home and tell your mother, your brilliant clips.
I feel like that's been elevated past.
Yeah.
And I want to address some backlash that is going to obviously come.
I took stuff out of context for like the Jar Jar Binks thing in the policy wonk drop.
He's actually saying, isn't that funny?
Like it's just commenting on the character of Jar Jar Binks.
Yeah, it's just funny as an out of context drop.
Exactly.
But we, but the rest of it is going to be giving you backlash.
I just imagined backlash.
Where are these backlashers coming from?
I know that there's fans of the Jar Jar Binks drop.
It's a fantastic drop.
And then also what makes it fun is the way I cut it together to make it sound like he's saying
that Jar Jar Binks is a loser little titty baby.
But that comes from a time he was yelling about Colin Kaepernick.
Right.
So the two of them together, spliced together are funny, but the actual
things they come from aren't that good.
I don't think anybody who takes that, our technocrats drop as a, well, see,
they take them out of context is insane.
Well, I'm just saying the bracketeering is serious business.
Ah, yes, yes.
Bracketeering is serious business.
People are very, you know, they have their favorites and I understand and I respect that,
but there's reasons.
So here's the number one seed and it's two clips that are very similar.
And I couldn't decide which was representative.
So you're tossing them both in there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So these are.
Wish you washy, Dan.
Well, you'll see why.
Okay.
And liberal.
And liberal.
I'm liberal.
I rule.
The bat at the end really seals the deal.
And liberal.
Back liberal.
Back liberal.
I'm liberal.
Back.
I rule.
So there's that.
And then here is the second part of the, because he's doing the liberal stuff there,
but there's a different flavor of it too.
And I think it's, I think the number one seed is all of it.
Yeah.
Just, just, I want to be with you.
Liberal.
Liberal.
Seriously.
Oh, come on.
Ah, ah, liberal.
Ah, ah, yeah, ah, liberal.
Ah, good.
So that's the flip side of the liberal coin where he's like,
Il, Like smegel or some shit,
Right.
But that also it's important.
We just, we just, we are also going to add a, Alex Jones makes throat noises bracket.
Sure.
Sure.
It's also, it's important to remember to the, like that clip you heard at
the beginning there, is him opening a switch blame.
So that, that should.
That should weigh in to your vote.
That's a solid number one seed.
So yeah.
Number one seed had liberal versus number four seed.
It's free for all.
It's free for all.
Now we go to number two and three seed.
And this was difficult, a little difficult because the parameters of the, the miscellaneous
division is, it's wide open.
It can be anything.
Right.
It's not just religious things or swearing or guest appearances.
You are setting this up hard.
But I'm, I'm trying to get myself out of it.
It tastes bad.
Here's number three, Alex Jones talking, making a startling confession about his sexuality.
I'm going to be honest.
I'm actually gay and I'm, I'm, I'm dating a man named Rachel Maddow.
This is never going to end this joke.
They're going to take that out of context and loop it.
So that clip belongs in there partially because of the end.
I'm going to, I'm going to actually go with the, the, that clip is never going to end fake
laugh where, or that this, this joke is never going to end fake laugh because that's almost
a cry for help there.
She's like, for real, this joke is never going to end.
Alex, please.
Well, yeah.
That's another instance of, I don't remember that girl's name.
It's Julia something, uh, Urbansky or something like that.
She's that anarcho capitalist, uh, that was on, uh,
I believe he was also hitting on her as well.
Yeah.
It's tough to look at things without that prism.
It's, it's very flirty.
I think he actually lets her host, uh, for a good couple of segments on that show as
well, much like he did with Katie Hopkins.
Yes.
But, uh, so that's the number three seed.
And here we go, uh, to the number two seed.
And this probably isn't the number two seed because it's just gross.
And I think it's something that doesn't, uh, I think if we talked about this,
I'm not sure if we did, but if we did, it doesn't get enough attention.
Porn, take porn.
Please.
I can't even watch it anymore.
And I'm not going to sit up with our audience and be fake and say I've never seen porn.
I literally, you know what I like?
Oh, that's right.
I like typing in pinup girls from the fifties.
And I'll just sit there for like an hour on my computer looking at women as pinup girls.
Or like, or like a waitress in a, you know, in a cute skirt and cute outfit,
like a woman, cute and happy.
That's.
So that's, uh, that's the number two.
So who, because I felt like there needed to be a representation of Alex being gross,
being real gross.
That is so gross.
I like to sit in for an hour and look at pinup girls.
Like multiple or just, just the one probably probably multiple.
I assume he likes a selection.
You think he has a calendar?
He has to have, he has to have one of those calendars.
I mean, he sold a calendar that had like pinup shots of Leigh Ann McAdoo on it back in the day.
That's weird.
Yeah.
There's like, you can find, uh, like, uh, swimsuit pictures of her on the internet because of that.
She kind of takes away from some of her, um, journalistic credibility.
I don't know.
Maybe it does.
Maybe it doesn't.
You know, I don't know.
I'm not judging her for it.
That's also a really good, I don't know.
Yeah.
That's a tough question to ask, especially about somebody who has no journalistic
credibility via their own journalism.
I think that's the bigger issue is that she started at zero and it's not really
effective.
Yeah.
No, that's a good point.
Yeah.
So those are the seeds folks, uh, the, the, um, voting will be up on our Facebook page.
Go home and tell your mother you're brilliant and, uh, that will be up on, uh, Wednesday
when this episode drops.
What do you think, uh, what would you pick as your winner?
Uh, boy, I'll tell you what, it's tough.
I don't know how things are going to break, but I mean, because he.
No, I mean, your personal, like, I'm not asking you to predict.
I'm asking you, Dan, if you were going to vote for the ultimate winner.
Yeah.
What are you, what are you choosing?
What's your, what's your kind of, uh, flavor of Alex Jones clip?
I don't know if I want to bias people with it, but I think it's, uh, to me, uh, the,
I can pick, I can tell you what I think is going to, should win out of each division,
let's say.
All right.
I think I, I'm going to say should what you want or believe should win my prediction
for the final four is the, uh, Alex screaming, fuck you, uh, the number two,
fill your hand.
No, the number two, I think it's going to pull an upset possibly.
All right.
Um, act liberal.
I think is gotta, gotta give me act liberal.
Um, and then in the religious division, uh, probably the Pope is a devil worship.
I love the Pope as a devil worship.
It's a really strong, uh, really strong.
It's short, it's compact, and it gets to the point.
It's a great bit.
If something can beat it's time to pray.
I think that is the, the one that's possible.
And then from the guest division, I mean, I'm biased because we talked to him,
but I gotta go with Larry Nichols.
You gotta go with C.B. Larry.
Nick's, I just think that he's so crazy that he's dead yet.
No, he's alive.
Yeah.
Well, that's right.
Cause he's not actually sick.
No.
Yeah.
Well, I think he is sick.
It's just like it's not, it's not cancer.
Yeah.
That's what, that's my understanding.
I think someone was saying that he has like emphysema or something like that.
Oh, well that sucks.
Yeah, it does suck.
But, uh, I don't know.
I don't know the reality of it and I don't really particularly care.
Nope.
But I, I have a soft spot for Larry Nichols.
Right.
If Hamamoto's gone, he's up there.
Yes, that's true.
That's my favorite crazy.
That's true.
Although it's going to be tough against Steve Pochenik.
If it makes it to the next round, Steve Pochenik's manners lesson versus Larry Nichols.
I don't know how that's going to break.
Go home and tell your mother you're brilliant.
But that's not from that clip.
I know.
I thought you were going to ask me how I'm doing.
Is that clip?
So I don't know.
What about you?
What are your, what are your, what are your picks?
Man, I, I, I'm actually, uh, I'm partial to any impression that he does.
Right.
So that's, that's automatically kind of, uh, something that I, I like.
I don't think it's going to make it.
So the Italian person?
Yeah.
I don't think it's going to make it.
Oh, I see that.
But the only reason, the only reason I'm partial to his impressions is
because there's nothing I love more than making fun of his impressions
and calling them something else.
I don't know.
I don't know how I can enjoy that.
So that's, that's your pick.
Yeah.
Um, I kind of wish little goat men was in there now.
That was outside of the time.
Yeah.
00:48:18,400 --> 00:48:20,480
That was, that was rough.
Um, I'm going to go with the act liberal act liberal.
I'm going to go with that as the, as the ultimate winner.
I'm liberal.
Yeah.
It's tough.
I mean, it's a really perfect encapsulation of what Alex is about.
Yeah.
So those are the, those are the seeds.
My friends, these, uh, the get to voting, uh, hope everyone is not too furious
about some things that didn't make the cut.
Yes.
Yes.
Much like the, uh, much like the NCA bracket, there is always going to be somebody you feel
was snubbed.
Right.
There's always going to be somebody you feel who was more deserving.
We respect that Dan chose all of them.
So send him your emails, knowledge fight at gmail.com.
It wasn't me.
It was the selection committee.
Yup.
Yup.
Sure.
Sure.
If you enjoyed the show, you can check us out at knowledge fight.com.
That's true.
You could follow us on Twitter at knowledge underscore fight.
Correct.
Also on knowledge fight.com.
I've built a page where people can download the drops of stuff.
If you want to like make songs.
Oh, there you go.
Like that.
So if you want to make an electronic song or something like that, that is now.
Now I've never been more interested.
That's knowledge fight.com slash drops.
And there's a bunch of drops already up there.
And I'm putting more up as time goes on.
But it's an exhausting process of like finding these clips in my archive.
Yeah.
Eventually all our merch will be is just a CD version or a downloadable version of
all of the brilliant songs you guys create.
Yeah, that'd be great.
Yeah.
Also, we're on Facebook.
You are signing away your copyright.
Your copyrights whenever you upload it to our website.
Sorry.
Absolutely.
Yup.
And we get your kids.
Yeah.
We're an Apple.
We're an Apple kind of group.
That's what we do.
You're going to find us on iTunes?
Yes, you can.
Boy, this has been a short one.
This has been a short one.
It's been hard to get a flavor for who should take the honors.
Rick Derringer.
I don't know.
Why not?
Well, he listened to his wife.
You got to give him credit for that.
Fine.
Rick Derringer's wife.
There you go.
All right.
Rick Derringer's wife.
Go fuck yourself.
Andy and Kansas, you're on the air.
Thanks for holding.
So, Alex, I'm a first-time caller.
I'm a huge fan.
I love your work.
I love you.