Knowledge Fight - #196: August 21, 2018
Episode Date: August 22, 2018Today, Dan stays in the present day to tell Jordan about the August 21 episode of The Alex Jones Show. The gents don't like being in the present, so there must be something big that led them to do two... 2018 episodes in a row. There is something big, namely Alex basically confessing to a huge crime on air.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Andy and Kansas, you're on the air. Thanks for holding.
Hello, Alex. I'm a first-time caller. I'm a huge fan. I love your work.
I love you.
Hey, everybody. Welcome back to Knowledge Fight. I'm Dan.
I'm George.
We're a couple dudes like to sit around, drink novelty beverages,
and talk a little bit about Alex Jules.
Indeed, we are.
Dan.
What up?
Dan, how do you feel about the big banks, Dan?
The big banks?
How do you feel about the big banks?
Break them up.
You think they're great?
You think they're great?
Break them up.
You think the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau is unnecessary?
I have never been more aligned with Alex Jones for the wrong reasons
that I want to crush the banks, these international banksters,
all because that Chase Bank screwed me out of a couple bucks today.
They screwed you out of like 35 bucks.
That's all it takes to get me to completely become a guy.
If a bank screws you out of money, the only reason they're there
is to make sure that you don't get screwed out of money.
You would think. You would think that's part of it.
That's the whole point.
Yeah, yeah. It turns out I'm now on board with the tax protesters.
I'm in.
Yeah, get rid of sovereign citizens.
Get rid of the Fed.
Dan coin.
God, it's so brutal.
It's so brutal to be poor and then have the bank just fuck you.
And I know that this is not a unique experience and it's happened to me.
I know, but you're white.
No, but it's even happened to me in the past before too.
And it's just it feels so shitty.
There's like nothing you can do.
Yeah, there's nothing you can do.
They don't give a fuck about you.
They don't care.
It's it's demonstrably their fault.
Yeah, that they made a glitch and now you don't have your money.
Yeah.
Anyway, I don't want to complain about this.
This isn't my soapbox for, hey, I got screwed out of a couple bucks.
I do.
Let's fight him to the death.
And I absolutely don't want to create like some sort of pity me.
No, I don't think that's the we're not talking about pity, Dan.
We're talking about torches and talking about pitchforks.
And we're talking about fucking guillotines, my friend.
That is something that may come up over the course of this episode.
But generally, what we'll be talking about is how I know a lot about Alex Jones.
And I don't know anything about what you tell me about Alex Jones.
Indeed.
Indeed.
Jordan.
So today, yes, to quote the great broke back mountain watch out for bees.
I try.
Wait, you say that like it was a guy.
The great movie.
I think it's Healan Hall in the movie.
I try to stay away from modern day Alex Jones, but I wish I could quit.
Oh, so today we're in the present.
We are going to go over the August 21st, 2018 episode.
And one of the reasons for it was over the course of the afternoon, we saw so
much happen in the world of Trump world.
Yeah.
You know, with Michael Cohen pleading guilty to and clearly striking a deal
wherein he implicated the president in court.
Hilariously saying that he was he was told to pay a guy off.
It was some guy, some candidate for president.
Sure.
Let's not name whom could be Kucinich.
Could be anybody charge.
Could be anybody.
Right.
My money is on Jill Stein.
But I don't know.
Jill Stein is lousy with sex skills in her, in her past.
I, I, uh, so fun.
It's amazing that like, first of all, the court in court, he implicated Trump
and then also, um, you know, said it was for the, like for the sake of election
related stuff.
Yeah.
Like he actually said those things.
Hey, I'm guilty because of campaign finance.
Uh, fraud and, uh, it's become on behalf of some, some candidate.
Oh, man, some guy, some dude directed me to commit a crime.
Some dude was out of line and I was along with him crazy.
So there's that.
And then Paul Manafort was found guilty on eight out of 18 charges
that he was facing.
But that's only one of the trial.
I agree.
That's also, he has another trial coming up where he might get found
guilty on a bunch of other shit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
No, this dude's fucked.
And so like there's a lot going on and then I don't know if you were
following the, uh, Duncan Hunter escapades representative Duncan Hunter.
Oh, no.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't remember his name because that name sounds made up the, uh, the filing
against him for, uh, taking campaign funds and using it for personal expenses.
Ah, people have been dunking on him because of these specific things that
are in the, in the filing.
Duncan on Duncan, such tiny little expenses that he stole things from
because he couldn't afford all this.
He was just using it as his bank account essentially.
And so like there's a lot of bad stuff in conservative world.
And so I was like, a lot of this broke in the afternoon, but I wonder
if Alex knew it was coming first of all.
And then second of all, I wonder if he talks about any of it as it breaks
cause he's on air when those like a lot of those things start to happen.
And you would think somebody in his staff is like at least checking
Twitter every now and again.
Right.
And so I wanted to get in there and see if there was anything.
And that, that's why we're still in the present.
And I will say this.
I propose none of that stuff.
I found what might be the most troubling clip that we have ever played on this
show two years in to this show.
We've played so many fucking.
This is a high bar.
You are trying to reach here.
We have you better deliver this can't be an empty tease.
There is no way for this to fall flat.
We have played a clip where Alex admits that he spoke to Russian
intelligence when he thought it was an RT interview that he got tricked
into.
Yeah.
We have heard him talk about killing dogs repeatedly.
Oh yeah.
We have talked about Larry Nichols coming on the show and straight up
blackmailing Congress on the radio.
True.
None of that compares to the clip that I'm going to play you in
the middle of this show.
I am not teasing this too much.
You guys are going to love it.
It made me gasp.
I almost threw something across the room.
Trump killed Nock.
No, no.
Oh, that would be so.
Oh man.
It turns out why did I join Team Trump?
He killed my dog.
That guy's crazy.
That's a weird reason to do it.
And yet at the same time it makes perfect sense.
It's like that guy's crazy man.
He could do anything.
He killed my dog in front of me.
A man so psychopathic as to kill my dog and I'm a psychopath.
It's crazy.
Yep.
So before we get into today's show, I'd like to give a special
shout out to new donor.
Hey, very exciting.
This young lady actually called into the show and sent us that
delightful game super.
Oh man.
She has taken over the shout outs and it is a thrill to welcome
her to the team.
Congratulations, Catherine.
You are now a globalist.
I'm a policy wonk.
Four stars.
Go home to your mother and tell her you're brilliant.
Someone someone Sotomayor sent me a bucket of poop daddy shark.
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much.
We appreciate it.
And if you yourself out there would like to become a policy
wonk or a globalist or a technocrat or any of our weirdo titles
that we give people, you can do all of which are arbitrary and
we will definitely be playing the bumper for for a new level
that Alex played last week.
I actually think I found another thing to add into like I think
I could make a new clip.
The entire commercial that he had or I might make I might just
redo all of them.
Okay.
Maybe I don't know.
All right.
Anyway, you're you're you've got a lot on your plate.
It's true.
We got to take down the big banks first.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, that'll take a week.
Anyway, if you'd like to support us and what we do, you can go to our
website, knowledgefight.com and click sport the show.
We would appreciate it.
Please.
Two banks are stealing $30 from Dan and it's fine.
No.
And here's the other sad part.
That's devastating.
Yeah, I know.
That's all the fucking money you have.
That is like that is like my life is not good.
You know, like I was walking away from the bank earlier and I'm
like there's other ways that could be living.
This is this is a tight wire act.
I'm walking here.
But Jordan, like I said, we are doing August 21st, 2018.
Yes, here is an out of context drop from today's episode.
We go out and get you the most concentrated insane very best on
the market period at a price less than the competitors that is watered
down garbage.
That's a real angry sales pitch.
That is one bad door to door sales, which is what level he's at right now.
Sir, I don't want the vacuum.
Excuse me, sir.
The man of the house is not home.
Excuse me, sir.
Yeah.
How dare you a woman holding her baby walking up.
Get this vacuum.
We have the best vacuum.
Other vacuums are trash.
Dyson is bullshit.
Boy.
Yeah.
So fun stuff.
That should give you a little bit of an idea of like where his head's at.
Good place.
Good place.
Pretty desperate.
He's thinking.
He's thinking about how great life is about to be when he needs the
bank to refund him $30.
I'm looking forward to when you and Alex are on equal economic
footing, Dan.
We're going to be at a bar.
I'm dreaming.
Just sitting there slinging shots.
He's going to like leave the bottle.
You know what's up with you, old timer?
You know, it's going to be interesting.
I kind of believe that in like 20 years, you and Alex are really going
to be the only people who understand each other.
I think so too.
I think we already are.
I think so too.
I think so too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You guys are like soulmates.
Where we are star crossed commentators.
Producers?
Yeah.
I don't know.
Programmers?
Content creators.
Sure.
I don't like that term.
Destin to artists.
Sure.
Yes.
So we're broadcasters.
That's the obvious one.
Yeah.
On Monday's episode, we were covering last Friday's Alex Jones episode.
Indeed.
I discussed at the beginning of it how he's becoming a partisan hack.
And he's declaring that this next election is the most important of our
lifetimes of all time.
All this and he goes.
He doubles down on that a little bit at the opening of today's show.
We're only 77 days out from the most important election in US history.
And many could argue the most important election in world history.
America is ground zero for the battle for the future of humanity for the
globalist fight ragtag bands of pro America pro liberty pro western pro
God individuals ragtag groups of individuals who love God who have
million dollar studios complicated advertising deals.
Look look even the sell diamond gusset jeans even the rebellion in
Star Wars could afford X wings.
Come on man.
You gotta have a you gotta have a financial backing for it.
There weren't diamond gusset stickers on those.
That is the biggest issue that I have with the world of Star Wars is
that there's no product placement anywhere on them.
I would sponsor a rebellion.
I would argue.
I don't know if there are any products in that world other than like X
wings.
I don't see any name brands on anything.
Oh, that's a good question.
I might have missed some of it though.
I haven't studied those Star Wars movies.
Well now that's a that's a new thing to rewatch them for.
Figure out what brands are doing what for sure.
Is there Sierra mist in that world?
I don't think there is a long time ago.
Exactly.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sure.
I would say that hey, let's go with that.
Palpatine for important election than the midterms.
There's so many more important elections.
There's BCPC which is before Christ PepsiCo, right?
That's what it's called.
Sure.
How dare Alex cock out his own favorite guy, George Washington?
Maybe?
What?
Like one on elections?
Mm-hmm.
He didn't even win.
Well, what's the second time?
Yeah, that was like a default.
Yeah, nobody even knew what to do.
Fine.
He could say Andrew Jackson.
You know what?
It's like it's like in baseball.
I don't count anything before black people are allowed to play.
All the elections.
So fuck Babe Ruth.
I don't need that shit.
Until you play against black players, which is exactly what I
feel like with all the presidents up until fucking not even now
since we're throwing voter rolls off the goddamn place.
I still don't think it's a free and fair election.
Fair.
At the end of the day, Dan.
Everything's got asterisks all over it.
Exactly.
Fair enough.
And we should keep Andrew Jackson out of the Hall of Fame.
I'll tell you that right now.
He was juicing.
Yeah, there's no doubt.
So I mean, I don't know.
I don't want to, I don't want to break this down too far, but I
would say that there are more important elections throughout
all of history.
Hitler.
That's another that was, that was an important election.
That was a big one.
Um, I don't know.
What else you got?
Nothing.
I think it was when, uh, oh, the biggest one was probably when
Putin won last time with 97% of the vote.
Everybody projected him to win with only 96% of the vote and he
outperform landslide landslide victory after that.
Uh, that's a mandate is what that is.
I think, I think that Alex is a little bit, um, scurred.
He's a little bit shook.
And that's why he's doing this sort of language.
Could be.
Anyway, it's all good.
Uh, play your game, baby.
Um, and that's what he does in this next clip.
He plays his game and this is, this is pretty fun.
I actually think that we could probably take him up on this,
but it's absolutely not worth our time.
Are you sure?
They're misquoting me and thousands of publications everywhere,
saying that I said use battle rifles on the media.
That's why I'm offering a $1 million.
Dude, we need this contest.
We need this money.
One million dollar reward.
I don't care what it is, but that of course will never be paid
out because there is no video of me, uh, saying use battle rifles
on the media.
It's a total hoax by Lester Holt.
It is a hoax.
Lester hoax more like these individuals.
Brian Stelter, all of them, they sit there with Jack Dorsey
and go, I'm getting chills right now.
He said, come with the battle rifles, engage in criminal activity.
Now I said, use the judicial system legally and lawfully
and go after them criminally.
That's not quite right.
If Alex wants to give a million dollars out for anybody who
can claim that he's like threatening the media and being
really violent about them.
I could win that in a second.
Yeah, we gotta do that.
I think I could throughout this episode, quite frankly.
Yeah.
But if he's saying, uh, there's no video or clips of me saying
take the battle rifles like that specific clip, then fair play
Alex, but even if someone did present whatever you're looking
for to you, he's never going to give them that million dollars.
No, I know.
So it's, it's a, it's a hopeless quest, but we could, we could
definitely put together.
If I had more time and wasn't yelling at a bank all day, I
probably could have put together a super clip of him threatening
the media.
Yeah, that would probably be that would probably be easy.
It happens a lot.
It happens a lot more these days too.
But you should know that they're lying about him and that's why
he's comfortable with his million dollar offer that he obviously
doesn't have that million dollars to get away, which is exactly
why Trump is comfortable not testifying or giving a deposition
to Mueller.
It's because they're all lying about it.
Why would he even bother?
He's too correct.
He's too correct.
So Alex knows that they're lying about him and he knows as we
talked about on the last episode a little bit that the reason
they're doing that is because the media is about to false flag
themselves in order to blame the Patriots, which is why again,
it's fine for the Patriots to go out and murder everybody.
It's a false flag.
Don't worry about it.
And not too surprisingly, this is a theme that Alex has decided
to turn into one of his main talking points.
Kill everyone.
That's it as an article.
Infowars.com the tailing the actual quotes and the actual video
versus their criminal criminal vicious fraud fraud ahead of
framing the American people.
Fuck you.
Chasing events on their own institutions.
You can smell it.
You can see it.
It'd be like if you had a neighbor and they told you, you know,
fire is to burn down houses.
Hope when you go out of town next weekend to the beach, nobody
burns your house down to be like, what?
Dear weird neighbor.
And then later you come home and your house is burned down and
you'd call the police.
You say, Hey, my neighbor sets up about they go, well, that's
funny.
Mr. Brown or Mr. Johnson or Mr.
Whatever his name is.
There's real cases like this that have happened quite a few
times.
He's been convicted twice of arson and his mentally ill.
What?
And then they go arresting.
And I mean, they're they're saying your house is going to get
burned down.
Our house is going to get burned down.
The right wingers are going to attack us.
Look, Alex Jones is saying and he's saying it.
Meanwhile, in the very video, I'm like, they're going to false
flag themselves and stage events against themselves.
President Trump, they are setting this up to do it.
We and they've got Antifa saying they're coming with weapons
to members of Congress's houses.
They've already shot and attacked Congressman's Collise and
attack Rand Paul until they want to kidnap your son and rape
him with pedophiles.
Whoa, they did not do that last part.
Peter Fonda can say that.
Peter Fonda.
That's great.
That's not bad.
So the thing I'm looking at here is that makes no sense.
The metaphor.
None at all.
The metaphor would need to be that your crazy neighbor is
saying that you are going to burn down his house beforehand
or something like that.
It has nothing to do with your house.
And then he burns his own house in order to frame you for it.
Right.
Cause you need to generate pity for yourself or your house
is burned down.
Yeah.
So his metaphor doesn't really hold.
It kind of makes no sense.
But I don't expect it to make much sense because as we talked
about already, this is just a preemptive narrative building.
So when something does happen and someone does take a shot at
a journalist, Alex and his listeners conscience can be free.
It's it's really, really fucking disgusting to know that in
league with the guy who is saying that the media is our enemy
and they should be destroyed is a guy who's saying don't worry
about it because the media is doing it to themselves.
Right.
Right.
Right.
It's like, like what are you fucking talking about?
The definition of gaslighting should something happen.
And even if it doesn't, like you don't, we don't really get
to know the private goings on of all of these journalists.
But a lot of times people have posted threats they've gotten
and things like that.
And you just have to extrapolate in your mind how much more
of is it there that you don't see?
I mean, people have to deal with that a whole lot and they
shouldn't.
Well, you when you consider it when you factor in the massive
massive rise in hate crimes that have been committed since
the moment Trump was allowed to speak out loud.
Do you see that the German study about Facebook usage?
Huh?
They didn't.
I don't have all the details.
I don't trust the Germans.
They're very, very sketchy.
Merkel, who knows what she's up to?
Still not forgiving them.
You know what I'm saying?
I'm just keeping an away.
It takes a while.
Keeping an away eye on them.
There was a study that was done and I don't have all the details
in front of me, but the broad strokes of it were that they found
that even if you separate out all sorts of other demographic
features like class income brackets, race, political affiliation,
they found that in places where Facebook usage was one derivation
away, one statistical derivation away from the center,
where there was one more than the incidence of hate crimes rose
like 50%.
So they did, like what, a regression analysis that said
that there was a high correlation between the two?
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's not causation, obviously, but it is very interesting data
that I hope people do more looking into because it does sort of seem
to indicate that no matter where you fall on a lot of spectrums,
the inundation of bullshit online does tend to radicalize people.
So I don't know.
Let's go back to city states that don't communicate with each other.
Now you and Alex are talking.
I think that makes more sense.
Yeah.
We need to wall off Chicago.
Build that wall, Rom.
That's the only, that would be an interesting way for him to
lose the next election.
Keep Gary out.
Yeah.
Fuck Gary, Indiana.
We got to get rid of those guys.
Um, perhaps.
You know what?
That actually might solve our gun running issue though.
All of our guns come from Indiana.
So maybe we build a wall between Illinois and Indiana.
Well, there's no way that makes as much sense as any other wall.
There's no way that people who run guns from one state to another
would get around that.
No.
No, come on.
Impossible.
What?
We would have to have functioning roads if we don't even have taxes
anymore.
So fuck that.
So I think that your idea for Illinois politics and the next evolution
of it is interesting.
I'm going to take down Rom.
But now Jordan, I wanted to save this till the end and just be a huge
tease, but I have to do this chronologically.
All right.
So now we get here already.
Here's the big one.
The craziest clip I think I've ever heard on this show.
All right.
Put your mic down.
Turn it up for me a little bit.
All right.
And don't, don't scream over this.
All right.
All right.
I won't scream.
Hold in your screams.
I'm not going to scream.
Google would, Google would love to have me arrested and killed.
Guaranteed.
See, I've never killed anybody.
Technically, one guy to your health problems later.
What?
Technically, I didn't.
The point is I've never killed him.
Wait.
What?
What?
Alex killed the guy.
Wait.
What?
Alex killed the guy.
Alex killed the guy.
Alex fucking killed the guy.
Alex totally killed him.
Can you just admit to killing a guy?
We got to go from the top.
Holy shit.
What?
Google would, Google would love to have me arrested and killed.
Guaranteed.
See, I've never killed anybody.
Technically, one guy to your health problems later, but the
technically I didn't.
The point is technically I didn't kill a guy.
The guy is not the, I didn't kill a guy that you want to hear.
No.
Technically, I didn't kill a guy.
Technically.
He killed a guy.
What does that even mean?
He killed a guy.
I mean, like, I didn't finish the job.
I didn't do the day-to-mah.
Like, what are you talking about?
And did you hear how it almost sounded like he said a few years ago?
Yeah.
This isn't like when he was a kid in his street fighting days or anything like that.
He had some health problems too.
It wasn't like that.
He fucking killed a guy.
Absolutely.
So here's what I'm hearing out of that.
He got into like a fight of some sort and this guy had some health problems and
it turned out that Alex caused those health problems to murder that guy.
Meaning Alex killed a guy.
At this point for us to like sort of spitball the specifics of it is kind of
irresponsible except what we can say is by his own words, I think he killed a guy.
I think he killed a guy.
He definitely.
Holy fucking shit.
He killed a guy.
He definitely feels partially responsible for a murder.
You know what the issue here is?
What?
He does not experience a lot of guilt in that clip.
I feel like there should be a lot more going on if you go.
Like there should be.
No, but, but, but.
He should have been like, I mean, technically, technically I didn't kill him.
I didn't.
But, but he would never have brought it up and gone down that road if there wasn't
some kernel of something in the back of his mind.
Oh yeah.
I did do that.
I am responsible for that.
I am a murderer.
Or at least a manslaughterer.
And by his definition, he's killed at least 10 children with his abortions that he's
had.
So he's a mass murderer by his own definition.
Alex is the serial killer.
We always assumed that he was.
Damn.
So you add in throwing a killing dogs in that too, which is a natural sort of jumping
off point for a serial killer.
Yeah.
No, when you kill dogs, like the first thing that you see in serial killers is cruelty
to animals at a young age.
Absolutely.
He's a serial killer.
I'm willing to now give his credit as a self confessed murderer, Alex Jones.
I will take it.
So we got to start back over at the beginning of this clip because I think added into the
weirdness and what I think makes this the craziest clip I've ever heard is the confession
of murder and then where he goes after it.
Like, I think there's a part of his brain.
It's like, whoops.
And then you can see the gears turning kind of and he jumps into like, I'm going to distract
everyone so they don't realize what I just fucking said on my show.
Google would Google would love to have me arrested and killed.
Yeah, wrong.
Tied.
See, I've never killed anybody.
Technically one guy.
That's health problems later, but technically I didn't.
The point is I've never.
Fuck.
And.
But these people have helped China kill millions and now they're bringing it here and then
right there all day and go, Alex Jones was mean to the Sandy Hook families.
Alex Jones won't stop saying no one died.
And I'm like, I that's out of context.
I didn't say that the way you're saying it.
Please stop saying I'm saying it.
I'm so hurtful.
And they go, no, you hurt children.
You hurt children.
Meanwhile, they help China, the biggest mass murders in history.
They lie to get us into these wars.
They fund the Arab Spring to topple regimes that are actually more democratic.
So Alex, you killed a guy.
Yeah.
Why aren't you?
No, but it's brilliant.
He uses wheels and like, he's like, all right, everybody else murders.
It's like he's fall like he's about to fall off a cliff wall that he's climbing when
he says they killed a guy basically.
And then like, he's like, China, China kills people too.
Getting his hand on a new grip.
He's a good sliced alone and cliffhanger is what he's doing.
Yeah, exactly.
He's found his next handhold and he's like, all right, all right, I can climb.
I can climb from here.
Uh, they do some terrible things.
Meanwhile, there's the ghost of the guy that he's killed waiting at the bottom just staring
like, you're next.
Holy shit.
You're next.
Who did he kill?
I don't know.
This is nuts.
Can we, do we have standing?
No.
Can we call somebody?
Although murder.
Is there a call to make?
To quote the wire, murder stays murder.
That's not something that goes away.
I want to know way more details on that story.
God.
So also, uh, when we're recording this last night, he was on coast to coast AM.
And if I had heard this clip before that, you bet your ass I would have called in and
been like, Hey, Alex, on the radio, you said you killed a guy.
What's up with that?
So, holy shit.
Yeah.
We need to know more about that.
Uh, I don't know if we'll ever get to the bottom of it, but congratulations, Alex.
You just admitted on air that you probably killed a guy.
Yeah.
Hey, I wonder if right wing watching media matters are talking about that.
I don't know.
He just admitted that he killed a guy.
If you are the guy that Alex killed, please call 503 neon nip.
Yeah.
Oh, also, by the way, shit.
I know.
I forgot to do that at the top of the show.
I remember.
Do we have one now?
We have a call.
Did somebody kill him?
Should we go to the call?
We should go to this call.
I do.
We need something to like, we need to cleanse the palette because that is, that should
be the end of our fucking show is that that's like, that's like, that's such a jinx moment.
That's whenever Bob Durst is like, oh, cause you killed everybody.
What did I do?
I killed them all.
I killed them all.
Alex didn't start burping weird in the middle of that.
Where was this tick?
Yeah.
I suppose his tick was to blame the Chinese.
And the ear thing.
Oh, he did do the ear thing.
I don't know.
This is from the podcast.
I didn't watch that.
But I did also find it on YouTube with very few views once again.
So that's great.
But yes, as a palette cleanser, let's go to the phone lines.
We got a very awesome.
Did somebody from Chico kill a guy and then left us a message?
Did we, did we discover, is Alex the Zodiac killer?
Maybe.
We did not get a call from Chico, nor did we get a call about Alex killing somebody.
But we've got our first international message.
No shit.
Hello.
This is Sonia from Sweden.
I'm just calling to say thank you for this amazing show that you do.
It's very helpful to get me through the days of work.
So that's good.
And I know I'm probably supposed to tell you to come here and do a live show, but I'm
a very reasonable person.
I'm not going to do that.
Anyway, that was about it.
I just wanted to say thank you.
And yeah.
Okay.
Oh, thank you so much, Sonia.
Oh my God, Sonia.
We appreciate it.
I'm going to fucking cry.
I'm going to fucking cry.
What are you talking about?
We got a call from fucking Sweden.
I didn't even know they had phones.
Wow.
That's probably a bigotry there on some level.
The soft bigotry of diminished expectations coming out in your view of Europe.
Come on.
What are you talking about?
Obviously Sweden has a more competent phone system than we do.
They can call here.
I don't even know how to call in Sweden.
I think you have to do a country code.
We have one.
Number one.
Is that why?
I don't know.
Probably because we invented phones.
Fuck that, China.
Thank you so much, Sonia.
It's so great to hear from you.
We appreciate your longtime support of the show and you're the best.
It really does.
It is fantastic to hear your voice, Sonia.
You have been a huge supporter for a long time.
Yeah.
Also, why didn't you tell us about Alex killing a guy, Sonia?
You knew it.
If you can call America, you could have figured that shit out way in advance.
I thought that we were doing that to get us off the killing topic.
I'm sorry.
It's hard to move on from that.
That's all I've got.
Bananas.
So now let's try our best to deal with this.
Now we see Alex through the prism of murder.
See if we can still do the show, quite frankly.
The prism of murder.
It's very difficult.
As we learn more things, the white supremacy has been a part of his rhetoric for a decade,
at least.
He's awful.
It's hard to look at him the same way as we get these new layers of awareness.
I don't know if there's any more than he killed a guy.
How do we see him as the same person anymore?
When he's drunk and forlorn, it's no longer like, isn't this funny?
He's experienced some guilt over killing a guy.
He's wrestling with demons, like hardcore demons.
Which is why he thinks they're real.
Because they're plaguing him after killing a guy.
He knows they're demons because he's chasing them.
He doesn't get a little bit of sleep because he's too busy working on the Info War.
It's because he's crying.
I'm fine with that.
It's terrible.
I somewhat jokingly assumed that he had killed a guy.
It is still jarring to hear him say, I killed a guy.
Well, not technically.
That's not a defense!
It's not a defense!
And you're on a fucking radio show, man.
If you just say, I've never killed a guy, no one's going to be like, yes you have.
All right, so I, okay.
Just stop it, I never killed a guy.
I hit him with my car, right?
But technically, I was so drunk, I was in the passenger seat at the time.
The car killed him, I wasn't even doing anything.
The health problems that came later from the guy.
All right, we're going to be here all night if we don't stop talking about the potential murderer here.
All right, okay.
So now we'll get on to another topic here.
And that is Alex completely lying about what is very clearly his timeline about George Soros.
They are using a malice playbook.
You think they're playing games?
These people are not playing games.
They're funded by a crazy Nazi collaborator who, when I was a teenager, was on the Lair News Hour
that he was an international criminal that overthrew governments and devalued currencies
and stole people's pension funds.
By the way, it would be the McNeil-Lair hour back then.
But also, dude, you didn't know about Soros before.
You didn't know about him since he were a teen.
That's such bullshit.
We're going back into, like, even 2009.
He lists all of his arch-globalists, his main enemies.
Soros has never come up.
I found one clip that Bob Chapman brings up George Soros.
And Alex doesn't register it at all.
Doesn't know the name.
He moves on to another thing.
And the way that Bob Chapman's bringing him up is not even as like he's an evil guy.
It's just that he's a rich dude who doesn't agree with us politically.
It's not even in terms of, like, he's masterminding stuff.
Yeah, I'm excited to know when that happens.
Alex dismisses it out of hand.
So the idea that he's known about him as some sort of monster who overthrows countries since he's a teen
is categorically not true.
It's a very recent piece of his worldview.
So I like that move that he's doing.
Also, Alex, in ironic defense of China,
the mouse playbook does include the Statue of Liberty play.
So that kind of undercuts your argument right there.
The flea flicker.
Yeah, the 48 special.
False fake pun.
False flag pun.
False flag pun.
Now I want an info wars football playbook.
That's what I need.
That would be great.
Yeah.
Man, that would be good merch for us.
That would be good merch.
Oh yeah, that's right.
We still haven't written a book that's supposed to make us money.
Oh boy.
We're going to get there.
We're basically almost at book length for what I'm working on right now.
Right.
So hey, there will be a book that you don't have to buy.
We're fucked.
Yeah, we're great at this.
Oh boy.
Free online book coming soon.
Yeah.
Spread out on a ton of different web pages.
Yeah.
Anyway, he's not done talking about Soros yet.
And I'll say on our last episode, we talked about how for Lauren to get him on SNL, Alex
needs three characters.
Right.
Tomo and Sanders that are very close.
They're pretty much the same character.
They're very close.
They are also his mentally handicapped character, which is dicey at best.
Yeah.
We're always remiss to not bring up that that.
Thank you.
Welcome to McDonald's.
May I take your order?
It's very offensive.
Well, it's a direct, what he's doing is a commercial from the 90s from McDonald's
where there was a guy with Down syndrome who worked at McDonald's.
And so that is what he's making fun of, which makes it even more offensive.
Man, the 90s were fucking crazy.
What?
We've been even too fair when we make fun of how bad that impression is because we
don't even bring into it that he's making fun of someone with Down syndrome.
That's because I didn't know.
Yeah.
Man.
Yeah.
He sucks.
But it's weird how much better and worse a place it is than it was in the 90s.
Yeah.
So, Jordan, we now have his third character.
Yes.
We, like I said, Cuomo, Sanders.
Yeah.
Well, George Soros slightly meets Dracula.
I'm just supposed to roll over to some crazy Nazi collaborator that overthrows countries
and steals all people's pension funds.
And you've got the entire Hollywood scumbaggery worshiping you.
It was happy making time when I would help round up the Jews.
I feel not bad about it at all.
I'll say right now, not the worst impression.
As far as his accents go, I'm going to give him a solid B on this.
He's like, again, grading on a scale.
Right.
Right.
I mean, the content of it is hot bullshit.
Yeah.
But I do think that he's, he's in the ballpark of Hungarian.
I'll give him that.
It's not too far off.
Okay.
All right.
I've heard Soros talk before and it's not, it's not crazy far off.
Does he?
It's not good.
I don't like the, I don't like the mixing up verb tenses as though that's okay.
No, that, that's bad.
But again, like I'm saying, the content is bad.
Yeah.
But just the voice, the vocal quality.
Not terrible.
He's done so much worse and he's about to B.
I said, it was very invigorating time for me in my life.
I love the Transylvania accent.
Blah, blah, blah.
It was fun to do what we do to you.
And you don't even know it, do you?
It's so much good times.
My son is a spirit-cooking bitch.
He looks even crazier than I do.
Every photo has to be silly.
Your country's hot.
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
No one stops us.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
No one gets in our way.
Drop the gun away.
Get him.
Jones got our way.
The Star Wars references flying fast and loose.
No one gets in my way.
No one.
U.S. deports former Nazi camp guard 95 to Germany.
Did he just convicted it?
But not Soros.
No, no, no.
He doesn't get shipped away.
He's a good man.
Well, that's because he wasn't a Nazi.
It's like, hey, Alex, are you mad that this Nazi got deported
who was hiding in America?
Are you mad about that?
I don't know why you would be.
A sense of fairness.
Right.
If you're going to deport one Nazi,
why aren't we deporting all Nazis?
And that's because we would get rid of 90% of his listeners.
If we go for that argument, I'm listening.
I'm listening.
Why only this old dude?
Sure, sure, we can do better.
But if your argument is why are we getting rid of this old dude
when we could get rid of George Soros,
I would say very substantial reasons.
One, again, he's not a Nazi.
Never was.
Second, it does make it seem like he doesn't want that old guy deported.
And if his argument were he's fucking 95,
just let him die, then I'd listen.
I would say, yeah, it's probably not worth it
to go through the rigmarole of deporting him.
On the other hand, he's a fucking Nazi.
Who gives a shit if he's uncomfortable at 95?
Yeah, I'm going to go with all of my sympathies
and when you ushered people into an oven.
Yeah, I agree.
I see a logistical argument for why it's probably not worth it,
but I don't give a shit.
And I also am not charmed by arguments that are like,
why are we deporting this guy when we could do more?
Right.
Deport more people.
I mean, if you're going to go with like a pure profit loss statement,
I mean, yeah, you're losing more money deporting the guy
than you would be if you just left him alone.
But on the moral profit and loss, I mean, I still don't care.
I'm going to go with I Don't Care.
I'm going to punt on this one.
Sure, sure.
Yeah.
Yeah, it just cares.
Anyway, Alex.
Why is that even a new story?
Isn't that interesting?
I think it's one of those like, the world has become so fucked up
that that's a feel good story.
Like there used to be the cat gets rescued from tree in local news
and now it's, well, at least we got one Nazi out of here.
Or like five, six years ago, it was tranquilized bear falls out of tree.
And everybody can feel great about that.
He's fine.
He's doing great.
Nobody was hurt.
We got a funny picture.
Oh, you were like, rolls over and he doesn't fall far.
And he looks like a little kitten or a, there's those goats that you yell at
and they fall over.
Oh, that's a feel good story.
We used to have those.
We found a 90 year old Nazi.
We kicked him out of the country.
That's not good.
That's a sign of a bad times.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's not great.
No, that's also that's a, that's a real bad scoreboard for us
in the Nazis still where it's like, all right.
We got one Nazi out of here.
Now we return to having a president who's a Nazi.
God damn it.
Yeah.
It's not great.
Yeah.
So Alex knows that he is a man.
You know that?
So he's a man and he's not afraid.
He's like a weird perverse, like a monstrous idea of a man.
He's like bone crusher and that he's never scared.
Right.
That's what I'm talking about.
The globalists are something to be feared, but he's not afraid of them.
Okay.
Well, that's nice.
I can't live your life in fear.
He rambles about it so nonsensically in this next clip.
This is what they're doing.
Now I need to tell you this right now.
What?
People say, why didn't somebody stand for the globalist?
Why didn't somebody take action?
Well, because people are scared.
That's why cowards.
And I'll be honest with you.
I don't want to call it fear because I'm not a big flight guy.
I'm more of a fight guys, but this is like when you.
Yeah.
When you.
Scared.
Infowars.
This whole operation is me seeing a bunch of serious tyrants that think I'm a person.
I'm a slave and think you're a slave.
And they think because I'm not a psychopath or sociopath.
And I have deep chivalry.
That.
No.
I'm not like that.
I am dying baby.
Look empty.
You act empty.
Your, your families are ugly and stupid.
You look like you have been cursed to hell.
I know you have horrible lives.
I know all about you.
I don't want to be with you.
Understand.
It's about, it's an energy thing.
I want to go with the energy that loves people and builds things and it's open and honorable.
I will go elsewhere.
Serve your satanic system ever.
And I pray that Jesus Christ and the father and the Holy spirit moves across the world
and gets humanity to awaken before we go into an even deeper level of this because this
is our last chance.
And Trump is a final signpost on the way to hell pointing back saying go back, go back.
This way leads destruction.
Now at the end there, he thinks what he's saying is that Trump is good in some way because
it's warning against the evils of liberalism or whatever.
Except he's really close to hell.
He's a sign that you have, you only get to Trump when you're really close to hell.
And the way I hear that is Trump is a warning that like, hey, if you go along the path I'm
taking you down, that's where hell goes.
Also, isn't he, isn't he like referencing abandon all hope you who enter?
Like is it, Trump is a sign that says abandon all hope you who enter.
That's an apt metaphor now.
Yeah.
That makes perfect sense.
Go further.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Hey buddy, guess what?
You're in my world now.
Fuck off.
So that's real weird.
And like that rambling nonsense about like not being afraid and all this and like info
wars is like this, we fight that stuff and it's coming after that weird Soros Dracula impression.
I'm just sitting here listening to this and I'm like, why are you doing the show anymore?
That's a good question.
What are you doing?
Fun.
Like I understand.
Why are we doing the show?
I enjoy it.
See, there you go.
We found out that he's a fucking murderer.
That's a great day.
There's not a great day.
We never know what we're going to find under that rock.
Is it going to be a bug or a confession?
You don't know.
And that's what keeps me going.
It keeps me excited.
Oh yeah.
And so I, and what else am I going to do?
Quite frankly.
All right.
I don't want to do stand up anymore.
I don't want to.
Seriously.
I don't want to nine to five.
I swear to God, you two are the only people who understand each other.
Yeah.
I don't want to do one day.
Just move in together.
And oh, I just wrote the best TV show.
No, odd couple to the max.
No, no, no, no.
Also what kind of I want to be the Clarice to his Hannibal.
I want to be the guy who is like the only person he'll talk to when he's in prison.
All right.
That's the goal.
I want to fish out a water comedy where you take your first entry level job at Info Wars
and you're all trying to navigate your way to the top.
It's great.
How to make it at Info Wars and influence people.
Of course.
Right.
Also for somebody who claims that he wants to go towards good energy.
Has he ever put out any positive energy on a show ever?
He's against like marijuana.
Yeah.
But he's against it.
Like, I mean, like a positive, like a positive.
No, no, no.
That's a positive outcome.
That's not a positive energy.
Oh, no.
Then no, you know, like there's never been a situation on a show where you're like,
I actually feel good.
Well, like when he even when he yells about loving life and stuff like that, it's angry.
Yeah.
It's brutal.
It's still even like, I love life.
Yeah.
Oh, I don't know.
That's bad.
But you know, you should go to see someone about as a aura.
Yeah.
Get his chakras rebalanced.
That's a good idea.
But we actually pineal gland.
We find out later that he's not into mysticism.
No, who would guess?
Yeah.
But he kind of is.
We'll give that.
He's super into mysticism.
That's a tease for a little bit later.
So before we get there, you might or may not, you know, who knows, be into mysticism.
One thing he is into is talking about the devil.
But this is the final course.
And that's why the enemy's activating.
It's why they're getting so satanic.
It's why they're so hateful now because they want your soul.
They want your energy.
They want to run your mind.
And they have already turned all their minions over to a form of spiritual possession of just
hate.
They're around nature reporters now.
They literally.
Right.
That's the spirit.
It's like zombie Osis.
And I just look at them and feel sorry for them.
They don't know how to handle that.
And they'll kind of, I mean, these people will do anything.
They'd love to see us.
And they won't do that.
They already helped China run it.
So we need financial support.
We last day, yesterday, I have not come up with new specials yet.
Easter sales still gone.
He hasn't come up with new specials.
No.
So the old special, they were supposed to end yesterday.
Still in effect.
What new specials are there to come up with?
It's all the same shit.
It's the same special.
Yeah.
It's like Taco Bell.
We've been on two years of the same Easter special.
It's Taco Bell, man.
It's the same ingredients put into a slightly different combination.
Red delivery system.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's all his specials are.
It's like free shipping on every 50% off the store.
I'm going to put Doritos in there.
Yeah.
Maybe.
I don't know.
It's all right.
Volcano sauce.
Oh, shit.
You guys sign up for auto shipping.
We're going to toss in a year's worth of food.
Oh, buckets.
But you know what?
Alex already has buckets.
Like he has survival food.
He's.
I don't like that.
That's the thing that we is now.
I don't like that.
My life involves like, oh, yeah, yeah.
This guy sells buckets of food.
But who's got more buckets?
Before this show, the only guy who had buckets was fucking
Colonel Sanders.
That's right.
That's good.
Good.
Good one.
I don't mean that.
The timing wasn't right for me to laugh.
And I feel bad about it, but I enjoy it.
You're the best straight man there ever.
Like Dick Smothers over here.
Wait.
That was their son.
Wasn't it?
I have no idea.
I'm letting this go.
I'm just letting this go.
Smothers.
The brothers.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't want to talk about them.
Those guys were awesome.
They were awesome.
They were fucking so much more awesome than we know.
They were like a rock star duo.
Like it's crazy.
Yeah.
They're real cool.
I recommend their biography.
Yeah.
They fuck a lot.
Yeah.
I don't know if that's cool or not.
Their son was a porn star.
Really?
Dick Smothers.
Yeah.
He ended up becoming a porn star.
But God, he must have killed a lot of people with that dick.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
The balls.
All right.
Fuck this.
Fuck you.
So, you know, that's called being a great straight man, Dan.
All right.
I deserve that.
So, in this next clip.
So, Jordan, what I would say is that the second hour of this
show is a wash.
Okay.
We're not going to listen to anything from it.
Okay.
Because Alex brings in David Knight.
Oh, come on.
But as I was listening to it, I couldn't tell if Alex had just left
and David Knight was taking over because he played a like four-minute-long
promo piece about David Knight's show, The Real News.
Right.
And because it's the only one you can still find anywhere.
But in the promo of it, it goes from like him doing an introduction of
your host, David Knight.
And then David Knight comes in and it's like, I am David Knight.
This is The Real News.
We're talking to Lionel.
And it's like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, this promo package
involves coming in from break and part of his real show.
What is going on?
It was very confusing.
Yeah.
But it did include this.
And this is probably the only thing I think it's worth listening to
because it's fucking hysterical.
He's not sorry when Snowflakes can't handle the truth.
It's your host, David Knight.
He's not sorry if Snowflakes can't handle his shit, bro.
Dude, everyone can handle David Knight's shit.
Yeah, I think so.
That's why he's still allowed on all of these platforms.
Everyone, even, even everyone who is piling on with Alex was like, oh yeah,
David Knight is a zero.
Interestingly, everyone can handle David Knight and simultaneously no one
can.
Yeah.
Because it's so goddamn boring.
Yeah.
Again, zero.
There's no positive or negative.
He's just there.
He's just mostly, most of his appearances, Alex trying to get in and being like,
yeah, not only that, but, and then also David Knight talking a lot about the
fourth turning.
Sure.
Which is that philosophy that Steve Bannon describes to a lot.
I read an interview with the, the guy who put that fourth, not Strauss,
because he died in like 2007.
Right.
Another guy, I think Howe might be his name.
But I read an article where he was explaining his philosophies and they're
not, they're not in favor of what Trump is doing necessarily.
Yeah.
Like the actual philosophies are not.
They, they're actually, they kind of lead to like this behavior that's being
demonstrated by Trump is a negative thing.
And it only precipitates more of the crisis that is described by the fourth
turning.
Yeah.
So again, everything that the conservatives have said they believe this entire time is
invalidated.
And in fact, 180 degrees from what Trump is actually doing.
And they don't care.
So fuck them.
Yeah.
So it's not really what it would happen if Alex goes on David's show.
Is he, would he do that?
I think David Knight's been kicked off everything too.
You think so?
I think so.
Okay.
I think it was a slow roll on him, on his part.
But also it doesn't matter because David Knight didn't, I don't think he had as
much sort of traction, as much exposure and stuff like that.
So I think a lot of his play was coming from post, getting posted on the
Infowars, Alex Jones channel and stuff like that.
So when that's taken away, his reach has diminished entirely as well.
Of course.
So even if the show is still searchable on X, Y or Z thing,
I still don't think it matters that much.
He's crippled by the same bands that Alex is crippled by.
So I don't know.
All right.
Stealth move for Alex.
Slowly take over David Knight's show.
It's not a terrible idea.
It's not a terrible idea.
Right?
Like nobody's going to go, nobody's going to go for the second kill.
Everybody's going to be like, I mean, we got him once.
Let's just ignore him from here on out.
And then slowly he's just like, Hey David, I'm going to do an hour of your show.
No big deal.
And then, Hey David, while I'm talking, maybe you don't need to be around.
Fundamental problem with that.
Alex doesn't want to get on air at eight in the morning.
Oh, that is a big issue.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think he couldn't get out of bed that early.
That I agree.
I, that's the only decision Alex has made in a long time that I support.
Holy.
So I don't, like we're not going to listen to anything of David Knight's
interview, but I forgot that there was this one clip that I think is pretty
interesting about David Knight's past show.
David Knight.
Well, six, seven years ago entered a contest.
He didn't win the contest, but he ended up moving down here from what North
Carolina with his family to sweltering Texas.
And I love Texas, but let me tell you, North Carolina is a lot prettier and
a lot nicer.
Right.
I mean, I love it up there.
He pulled up stakes, sold his house, his business and came down here and
he's helped change the world.
And I wanted to get, get him on the one year anniversary because they've been
trying to shut him down.
You're destroying his, his YouTube channel with nine million subscribers.
There's no way he had nine million real subscribers, but be that as it may.
He's the Dave Holmes of info wars.
He didn't win the contest and yet he got his own show.
Are you telling me that there was a Jesse camp who won the show?
So, so David Knight in this metaphor is Mike TV in Willy Wonka.
Like he didn't actually win the contest.
No, but you know, I think, but then Mike TV turned out to run the, this is
stupid.
You know, I'm pretty sure it did.
Who?
Diane McAdoo.
Oh, did she win the contest?
Well, I know that she won a contest in order to become an info wars reporter.
I know that.
I really don't like the whole contest as test of whether or not you should.
Turns out a lot of his employees came from contests.
You know why?
He loves a fucking contest.
You know why most major businesses don't hire people based on contests?
Unreliable.
Unreliable.
You're looking for consistency.
Poor predictor of talent.
Yeah, it's not good.
I don't know if you've ever been to a comedy contest, Dan.
Boy, I've lost some.
Yeah.
Not necessarily a measurement of quality or skill.
At deja vu in Columbia, Missouri, there was a comedy contest.
Yeah.
And I was a part of it and I lost.
But one of the nights that I was on, there were two musical acts, right?
Two guitar comedy acts.
That's brutal.
One guitar comedy act is awful.
One of them was a friend of mine who I'm not going to name because it seemed like I was
shitting on him, which I kind of am, but I don't want to make it personal.
His name is Michael Droid, but he showed up late.
So he wasn't there when the first guitar act went on.
So he didn't know?
No.
His act wasn't entirely guitar, but one of his big bits was he would do a cover of Hey,
There, Delilah.
Oh, no.
No.
No, dad.
No, I'm going to cry.
His parody, his parody of it was, I don't remember the rest of the, like the, like the
verses, but the chorus was, Hey, you got some big titties.
Oh, ones I want to squeeze.
It was terrible.
Yeah.
Terrible.
Yeah.
So what's his name again?
Michael Droid.
Still doing comedy.
I think he's out in LA.
He's probably doing great.
Good luck out there, buddy.
I hope that song still kills.
Oh yeah.
Because it's become a TV show.
So the first guitar act also did a parody of Hey, There, Delilah.
That was very similar.
That's crazy.
It wasn't exactly the same, but it was very similar.
But like I said, Old Rage showed up after that.
So he didn't know.
And none of us who knew him knew that he was going to do that act until he was walking
towards stage with his guitar.
No.
And so he gets up on stage and does it and it usually goes really well at that club.
Of course.
Because it's a club full.
Well, Deja Vu was a club where it was mostly like the people who were in the comedy room
were just underage people who knew that they could drink there with fake IDs and stuff like
that.
Yeah.
And you had to go to the show before the dance party downstairs.
Oh.
They had a club downstairs and upstairs was the comedy club.
And so it was mostly.
The comedy business is honest and true.
It was mostly drunk 18 year olds who were in the audience.
So that sort of fucking thing generally killed there.
Of course.
And so just the look in his face when he gets up there and does a Hey, There, Delilah cover
and he's getting nothing but confused looks from the audience.
It was one of the best days of my life that I was like, he was so confused and I was sitting
back there.
I was like, yeah.
That is incredible.
Just nothing.
That's an incredible story.
Nothing from the audience.
That's an incredible story.
Thank you.
Thank you.
We had a lot of fun back.
Oh man.
Missouri.
Anyway.
Hot man of comedy.
Alex killed a guy and we had fun in Missouri.
Two things you can take away from this story.
Right.
So I mean, this is all that we're only, I'm getting wistful because David Knight has come
up and I need to, we got to, we got to bail on that.
So we get to the third hour here and Alex Jones comes in with some of my favorite intro
music of his, which is super misplaced on his show and then says something pretty weird.
You know, this morning I was in there making breakfast with my four children, okay, three
up in the school and I was exhausted and I was tired and I went in and brushed my teeth
and my face, how old I look and how exhausted and I just never looked better.
I disagree.
What?
Strongly disagree.
Has he shaved?
No.
All right.
Well then the invalidated and those pictures of when he was 20, he looked great.
Yeah.
As much as I'd like to, you know, have not, have not seen this.
Does he look amazing?
Oh my God.
He was built like a brick shit house.
Yeah.
Nothing but muscle.
Yeah.
Um, so no, you've looked better.
Um, and hey man, he's got to stop playing Baltimore.
That's ridiculous.
That is, that is so offensive.
I just want him to play a song and then I would love for him to sing along with that
one too.
No, but I want him to sing along with the highwaymen while that song is playing.
I want him to be singing a completely different song because if you sing along with those
lyrics, you'd have to be like, this seems super gay.
Yeah.
This seems like a song about being in the closet.
If Alex just shows up and it's like, this seems like a jungle life, I'm heading into
nowhere on my own like Tarzan boy.
What, what if he really does have a good singing voice tonight?
Give me the other.
Give me the other.
He just can't do it on the show.
He's putting on his fake voice.
Maybe he's really got some pipes in there.
Monkey business.
Yeah.
God, it would be so great.
I fucking love that.
No, he wouldn't do it like that.
He would do it after he would do it like right before the lyric.
He'd be like, monkey business.
Oh, jungle life.
Love this song.
So good.
Anyway, really gets in touch with my.
Oh my God.
I killed a guy.
So it's been speculated on our Facebook group.
Go home and tell your mother you're brilliant.
Yes.
Alex must listen to our show because we have diamond gusset commercials and him singing along
with country music in the last episode.
Right.
The things that would make us happy.
Yes.
Seems like he's pointing a little bit of a little tip of the cap, a little wink.
Right.
And this next clip makes me think that there may be something to that because the other
thing that we really love is when Alex gets super weird and esoteric.
And I think he's doing a little bit of that in this next clip.
I almost started the broadcast with us today, but I'm doing it as we get into the third
hour here today.
That's because I woke up this morning and I just know I've studied history.
Hmm.
And I don't know how.
And I don't get into mysticism.
Any of that.
I just instinctively know that there are things connected.
That's not really the history books.
There'd be a big war in China.
They'd have a giant earthquake.
Or Rome would be in a big battle and then a volcano would just suddenly erupt.
This is so close to that guy who was on Jim Baker's show.
Wasn't it Jim Baker who was talking about there was that, or was that even Alex?
That was Alex was talking about how before World War One, there was that giant eclipse.
No, no, no.
That was the, that was Jim Baker.
That was the eclipse guy.
That was the, the blood moon guy.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Think about how similar that is.
Just like purely.
That's, that's the same.
Yeah.
That's the same thing.
Yeah.
It's crazy.
That's, that's magical thinking.
That's, that's creating parallels where none exist and are in fact, factually accurate.
Absolutely.
Or inaccurate.
Right.
But it gets worse.
It's a hundred miles away.
It just seems things rhyme.
Things kind of go, you've been out in the middle of the country.
No.
You're watching your deer hunt or something.
There's a four-way stop of a highway, maybe a quarter mile away.
You're looking through your rifle scope and you notice no cars come by for like 30 minutes,
but all of a sudden four cars come right at the same time.
And you wait about an hour and eat your sack lunch and, you know, sit back and get out your
little, uh, you know, get out your little hot toddy, uh, thermos, little bit of Jack Daniels
and the coffee and you're sitting there.
It's not a hot toddy.
Four cars come at the same time again and you're like, that was twice that it happens
again while you're up in the deer stand.
Let's be clear.
He's talking about coincidence.
That's all he's describing is, huh, that's weird.
You ever, uh, you ever look outside the window and you see four birds, but then for a week
you haven't seen a bird and then you see four birds again.
You ever see four cars?
That's just science.
You ever see four cars going down the road, uh, maybe a caravan of people traveling together?
What a weird thing that proves magic, but he doesn't get into mysticism.
You ever go to, you ever stop at a stoplight, see all those cars?
Then when the light turns green, less cars go away.
Weird.
But like I said, he's not into mysticism.
I've never heard of traffic patterns.
No.
So.
Fluid dynamics.
There's weird rhymes and as above so below in the world.
As above so below.
I woke up this morning.
My son's bathroom's broken.
So he came in and woke me up.
In my shower, my bathroom.
God love him.
I don't know why he announced I'm taking a shower as he walks to the bedroom, but okay.
You don't fucking.
I've just gone to bed two hours before my complaining system going back to that moment.
And I've been having a dream about volcanoes and earthquakes and meteors hitting the earth.
And I just sat up in my chair and I went, you know, with all these world changes going
on and all these wars and all this, this tech comic stuff.
I just wonder if history will align again.
The planets will align with all this, you know, literal planetary alignment going on.
If we're going to see some big earthquakes and I just said, go on air, Alex.
It's like, I thought they were going to blow up the World Trade Center and I described it all, how they blame bin Laden.
I just had a feeling and I had some dreams.
Sure.
And then I'm on record with that.
I don't get into this a lot, but I do have the, you know, what they call the touch.
What?
I don't think.
You have the shiny?
They're con artists and they can't control it.
No one can control it in my experience.
What?
In fact, the way to control it is not to control it, but.
What?
I just go to home work.
I think there's going to be some big earthquakes and I think there's going to be some big volcanoes.
I think there's going to be some big stuff kicking off in the next few months.
There's probably, we've recorded, just haven't recorded this in the last 200 years.
Okay.
So we got a prediction there, but also Alex killed a guy and as a psychic.
Why?
You know, two major things.
Why did he need that weird story about his son?
Because he's, he could have just said he had some dreams where he's the prophet or whatever
the fucking shit it is, where he has the goddamn shining and he can, he can see events in the past.
Because.
What are we doing?
Because you'd never believe it.
If it wasn't grounded in the, I'm annoyed by my son wanting to take a shower.
I would totally not believe it either way.
Now I just feel creepy about thinking about his son in the shower now.
But I also think that that's probably like, you've already heard a couple of times, he's
talked about like, I don't make breakfast with my four kids.
He's kind of really ramming home that he's had, has his kids, you know, like, yeah.
Oh, okay.
You think it's almost like a little posturing kind of, peacock and kind of move.
Well, I feel like it's kind of like a, people have, you know, people make fun of him.
You had your kids taken away and stuff like that.
So he's defensive about it.
Like, I made breakfast with my kids.
You dumb asshole.
Yeah.
That sort of thing.
I think all of that, even let my kids use my shower.
I think all of that is so I dream about the future.
That's so less important than I'm not into mystical shit.
Also, I have the touch.
It's like, what in two minutes?
He's like, I'm not into that stuff, but I should tell you for my entire life.
I've been able to tell the future.
Like, I know in the 2015 stuff, we did see him say that he had a prophetic dream and stuff.
Yeah.
But even that is kind of on a level that you can be like, all right, that's a one off.
He's bullshitting.
Or it's a one off.
Yeah.
You just got like some sort of a weird vision.
Yeah.
Now he's like, this is my whole life.
I predicted 9 11.
That's not hard to predict.
Bin Laden was involved with the original bombing.
No.
In fact, he said he was going to do it again.
Right.
So that's almost like you just took a man at his word.
Right.
And there's also many other people who had gone on record saying that this was going
to happen.
Yeah.
So it's not like he, that does not require prophecy.
But Alex Jones was on coast to coast AM last night.
Oh, did he talk about a prophecy?
I didn't listen to it.
But the other guest that was on was talking about prophecy.
Uh-huh.
So I think he might have listened to the other guy.
So you think he was listening and he was like, fuck you.
If you think you can prophesy, I've been a prophecy.
The old, I've been a prophet the whole time.
I can do better than that.
Yeah.
I think there might be.
He's so jealous and petty and pathetic.
I think there's a possibility.
Or he went to sleep listening to the rest of the show and it just got in his subconscious
because I would,
Or he went to sleep thinking, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Jungle life.
I'm going to record a cover of that just as Alex.
Now I think there's our money making operation.
Yes.
We just record pop songs in Alex's voice.
Alex Jones karaoke tracks coming soon to our Patreon.
So, uh, man, Alex has a prophecy and he's putting it out there on the air because part
of the prophecy was get on air and talk about this.
Um, and so it leads to, did he really just say that he has the touch?
Yes, he did.
Literally.
What is that?
What is that?
He said he has the touch.
Yeah.
Is that like a colloquial thing for psychics in the South?
He might be like Stephen King in Maine has the shining and in the South it's like, you
can see the future.
So you have the touch, which I don't, like, shouldn't he be able to heal people or something
like that?
Well, that's the,
Doesn't that suggest some sort of kinetic energy?
No, because it's, he has the one, he has the one who has been touched.
Oh, okay.
The power of touch.
Oh, no.
Okay.
Now that makes sense.
I retract my entire question.
He's the recipient of touch.
Makes perfect sense.
I was trying to go through the lyrics in my head while you're asking that question of the
Sean Michaels entrance music.
Uh, you know, I'm a sexy boy.
See, that's the thing that you would do.
I've got the moves that really move them.
Uh-huh.
But I can't remember if he says he's got the touch in there or anything.
He's just a sexy boy.
See now.
I was thinking of the Daft Punk track.
Touch.
It's a good song.
Never used as an intro song for a wrestler.
No, never used.
Touch.
I remember touch.
That's sad.
Robots in my mind.
Get out of here.
All right.
Alex has made this a prophecy prediction from his dream of earthquakes and volcanoes.
Uh, and it leads us here after he rambles for another couple of minutes about nonsense.
Uh, and I love this transition of his fears.
I'm just telling you, you know, I, I woke up this morning thinking about earthquakes
and volcanoes.
We know.
I never do.
And, uh, I mean, there, I think everybody senses this is the big change.
This is the big deal.
And you've got these soul reapers, these soul suckers.
Wait, what?
Uh, we are dealing with a literal spiritual vampire invasion.
These, they're activating people everywhere.
They're acting like absolute monster animals because they are.
They're gone.
They are completely jacked.
They turned over their consciousness to whatever this, you know, stuff is that floats around
in deep space and attaches itself to people.
And what?
You know, that's this event horizon.
I'm real sorry for him, but it's good to know Jesus hitting it.
It's good to not be a devil worshiper.
We'll be back.
I'm going to give the number out when we come back.
Stay with us.
Thank God you're not into mysticism, mystical stuff.
So whatever out there in space, right?
Some sort of demonic soul sucking vampiric.
Are we, are we talking to like some venom shit?
Is there like, is he talking about symbiotes?
I don't know.
I think that, I think that's probably too extreme because then it would affect your appearance.
Right?
Oh, that's true.
Yeah.
You would get the suit.
Yeah.
That would be really gauche for an alien race to do because you'd get picked on the lineup
so easily.
That's always been my biggest issue with the Spider-Man comics to gauche.
Right.
Right.
What about some subtle alien symbiotes, Dan?
I mean, we are one hair's length here away from reptilian shape shifters.
Right.
Frankly.
Oh, absolutely.
We are spiritually not far off.
We are, we are not far, we're not, it's the same fucking shit.
It's the same shit.
It's not like we're not far off.
It's that he's literally said there are things in space demons that attach themselves to
human beings and then change their abilities and appearance and so on and so forth.
And they smell like sulfur and all that shit.
Isn't it great to know Jesus though, Dan?
But I'm not into mystical shit.
Now.
And I'm a psychic.
Does this mean that Jesus fights aliens on a regular basis?
I mean, it must, or at least Jesus's boys do, you know, like his peeps.
Now, I would read a, read a graphic novel about that.
I'll tell you that right now.
Okay.
Let's get a, let's get our friends who write comics on the blower.
Let's call Elliot Ray Hall.
Yeah.
And see if he can make us a Jesus versus aliens.
Where's Jacari Jackson when you need him?
Come on, Jacari.
Come on, Jacari.
Um, so we, we, we move on here from Alex's prophecy corner, maybe we'll call it.
Okay.
And we get into now, um, what I would describe as him being a little bit petty, um, which
is not too surprising.
But this is.
Yeah, I was going to say.
This is really funny to me.
Yeah.
Well, Michelle Wolf, the worst comic I've ever seen.
One, another one of these women that they force fee that's politically correct.
It says cuss words every three seconds.
Thanks.
She canceled.
Another one bites the dust.
The opposition.
A show that stole my identity.
Didn't set horrible racist things I never said.
No writings.
Everybody hates you.
Another one bites the dust.
Alex, you're on like 40 radio stations in short ways.
What are you doing?
Man.
Jesus.
It's one thing for him to have his empire intact and everything be fine and then gloat
about Michelle Wolf's show getting canceled because he wouldn't give a shit about her
except she criticized the president and he's got it there.
And then the opposition getting canceled like it's one thing if you are doing well to then
have that shot and Freud of like fuck you all you people who are against me.
You're doing badly, Alex.
Yeah, it's it's it's so delusional to be like all you guys got your show canceled.
So did you and couldn't even get a show.
The Fox News wouldn't even have you on.
Also, come on, man.
There are ways to criticize female comedians that don't wind up being female comedians
are forced upon you.
God damn it.
Yeah.
Women can be just as unfunny as men and it has nothing to do with women.
Right.
And they can be as offensive as they want to be and it has nothing to do with their femininity
or being a woman.
Fuck you.
I can't do I can't do that.
I can't do I can't do dudes criticizing female comics.
It's not fun.
They're just comics.
And if you throw female in there, I get pissed.
The end.
Oh, no, that's frustrating.
You don't like that.
I've I've been in so many fucking lineups where you wind up the host is like, oh, right.
Now we got a we got a lady comic going up and I'm like, fuck you.
Yeah.
And like I said, he's gloating about them getting their shows canceled, but like he
doesn't have a show and never will.
It reminds me of a line that I think it was Brother Ali had in a in a battle that he did
with idea.
Okay.
Idea had made fun of him for like how many tapes he had sold.
And Brother Ali's response to it in the battle was, you talk about my tape, at least I got
a tape.
Oh, that sort of thing.
It's like, you're talking about their shows.
At least they had shows.
Yeah.
I'm asked.
Yeah.
You're unpopular to and toxic to an extent that Fox News would not like Tucker is defending
Alex.
They'd never have him on.
Oh, good God.
No.
In a week, I'll have to walk back when he has entirely possible.
But it seems to me right now would be a perfect time when Tucker is defending him.
Why not have him on as a guest?
Wouldn't that be the logical thing to do?
But no, he won't because they probably like, no, they'll way like him on the air.
Yeah.
These are lunatic.
No program.
No Fox News programming director is going to be like, Hey, listen, we agree with you.
We're fucking racist as shit too.
But no, we can't do this.
Tucker, you're damn close to him spiritually, but you're a pro.
No, you're the same thing.
You got away with wearing a bow tie for years, man, you're way too long and you were capable
of evolving to the point where you no longer wear a bow tie.
Alex is spiritually wearing the shittiest bow tie of all time.
There are a few people.
And he's going to keep wearing it.
There are a few people who can survive a bow tie phase or maybe they invited Alex on,
but they were like, you got to shave that fucking beard.
It's terrible.
No, it looks awful.
If Alex got it, if you want to go on TV ever shave the beard, if Alex got invited and
turned them down, he would never stop talking about it.
I know that.
Oh, that's true.
That's true.
He's not been invited.
You're right.
Anyway, we get back to Soros in this next clip.
Sure.
Why not?
Alex says something interesting about him and the way he says it is kind of gross, but
it's actually a really fun instance because we get to debunk another thing that he says
about Soros, kind of a new thing.
Okay.
To see George Soros walks as a man.
Okay.
You were there to drink fluoride and get brainwashed in the schools and eat GMO until you roll up
double X's in your eyes because this earth belongs to him.
He's a man.
You're an animal.
He just didn't like Hitler because Hitler was trying to take over before he did.
Soros wrote in books and in articles in the 80s that he believes he is Jesus Christ, the
Messiah.
Think about that.
Okay.
Think about that heart and remember he thinks he's better than you and his little demon son
and all the rest of them think they're better than you and your family.
That's so gross.
We was trying to do some ASMR there at the end.
That's fucked up.
I don't think it's a bad idea to really kind of dig into the ASMR world is very popular.
You are very relaxed.
Oh my God.
What if we did our show in ASMR?
Crinkling, crinkling, crinkling.
That is the next web series that we should do.
If we did one ASMR episode, it would be fucking insane.
Or ASMR Alex.
Like he's just like, here's some aluminum foil.
I'm crumbling up.
The world is ending and they're trying to, when I, the globalists, look at your family
and they want to take them into the basement.
This is so relaxing.
They take them into the basement and they put them on a table and they roll their hands
up into smaller tables and they put their parents on the tables made out of their hands
and I am bad at ASMR videos.
Now listeners have sent in words they want me to say because they find them soothing.
Poppycock.
Krugerrand.
Suck-a-tash.
Man, we should do a whole episode of that.
Boo-yaan.
Boo-ya-baze.
Boo-yaan.
Boo-ya-baze.
Boo-ya-baze.
Boo-yaan.
Oh, that's a very delicious cold soup.
Boo-ya-baze.
Boo-yaan.
Boo-ya.
The best.
No, I'm going to go.
Three words in a row.
I'm going to go.
No.
Over the years has said that he believes himself to be Jesus Christ, which is slightly inaccurate.
This is a misrepresentation of a quote from his book, The Alchemy of Finance.
I admit that I have always harbored an exaggerated view of my self importance.
To put it bluntly, I fancied myself as some kind of God or economic reformer like Kees,
each with his general theory or even better a scientist like Einstein.
So when he's saying that, he's talking about the delusions of his youth.
He's talking about the self importance that he felt that has been corrected through maturing
and becoming older.
There's a further quote from his book, Underwriting Democracy, that everybody throws around, everybody
who insults and critiques Soros, that goes like this, quote, if truth be known, I carried
some rather potent messianic fantasies with me from childhood, which I felt I had to control,
otherwise I might end up in the loony bin.
But when I made my way to the world, I wanted to indulge myself in my fantasies to the extent
that I could afford.
So that is a paraphrase, that's not even the right quote, but it's also selected.
The larger context of the quote, where it comes from, from the text puts it into perspective.
Quote, I began my work directed at opening up closed societies about 10 years ago.
I was a successful manager of an international investment fund and I was making more money
that I had use for.
I began to think about what I should do with it.
The idea of setting up a foundation appealed to me because I had always felt that one
should do something for other people if one could afford to.
I was a confirmed egoist, but I considered the pursuit of self-interest as too narrow
a base for my rather inflated self.
If truth be known, I carried some rather potent messianic fantasies with me from childhood,
which I felt I had to control, otherwise they might get me into trouble.
But when I had my way in the world, I wanted to indulge my fantasies to the extent I could
afford.
The messianic fantasies he had, he has discussed, come from the fact that he survived the Holocaust,
and the way he wanted to indulge his fantasies is that he wanted to set up ways to help promote
free societies.
Another quote from that same book, quote, I realized I cared passionately about the concept
of an open society in which people like me could enjoy freedom without being hounded
to death.
Accordingly, I called my foundation the open society fund with the objective of making
open societies viable and helping to open up closed societies.
So instead of experiencing a massive, depilitating survivor's guilt, he channeled that somehow
instead into almost a, the only reason I could have survived is because I am something special,
is because I have some gift or some, which is a very understandable delusion of youth.
Yeah.
That's a delusion of grandeur for sure.
Of youth too.
It's very understandable that someone in the circumstances that he was in, and when you
add in all the other context of his heroic father, who was a shining example to him,
who was a real hero, throughout all that horrible experience, you kind of do get a very, very
understandable path towards, I'm bulletproof, that sort of mentality that goes away with
time.
And that is what he expresses in these quotes, if you look at them in context, not to say
that he's a perfect person or anything like that, but all of these things that they use
to attack him are ludicrous.
All the, there's, there are reasonable critiques you could make, and they some, some reason,
I'm not sure why they only choose to use bullshit ones.
I don't know why that is.
Hmm.
It's very curious.
That is, I can't think of any reason, like for me, I think it's their lazy for me.
I mean, like, it's just the idea of being a billionaire, regardless of how philanthropic
you may be, right, is a crime unto itself.
So we could just talk about billionaires, but if you start talking about billionaires,
you got to start talking about other billionaires too.
Sure, sure.
It's almost like if you apply some sort of standard, it would have to then apply to your
team as well, and they don't like that.
No.
So they pick one fake standard.
It's so funny to demonize the team that they don't like.
It's so funny too, because like Alex will throw around these, these studies that have
been done about how like most billionaires donate to democratic candidates.
And that is actually accurate.
It's like a 60 something percent thing.
But every study that you read, if you actually get into like the finer points of it, go into
saying like a lot of the people on the right donate to like hidden funds and stuff like
that.
Yeah.
Like the donor fund and stuff like that.
So the idea of these studies, even in the studies themselves, they have the like, well,
there's a lot of donations that go on that we have no idea who's giving what money.
So it's crazy to see that donors who donate large amounts of money to the democratic party
are not as interested in hiding it from the rest of the world as people who donate to
the Republican party.
60.
Because the 60 something percent of the donors who are willing to be in public are democratic
donors.
So it doesn't really prove anything.
But billionaires on both sides, let's, let's, let's eat them.
Let's kill them.
Yeah.
They're the fucking Chase Bank of people.
Man.
I'm still mad.
I'm still mad.
Feeling a little better.
I'm done.
I'm done.
No more billionaires.
Sure.
I mean, I think it's morally suspicious.
So this next clip, this is great.
I don't know any other way to tell you this is great.
So he starts by getting into his themes about like how he's going to get blamed when the
media false flags themselves, which is fun.
But where it goes, nobody, nobody could predict.
It's so great.
They're trying to shut down our shopping cart in four store.com, but they haven't gotten
to that point.
They need to stage an attack on the New York Times, the Washington Post or CNN, then have
a Patsy that gets killed in the stairwell and the real gunman get away.
They got a truck from a federal building and blame it on me.
Oh, you remember that?
That's already happened to CNN.
That guy who said he was going to come kill everybody and then got arrested.
Now we're, you know, and find some crazy former, you know, army officer or something
is drugged up.
I know he is, you know, with my books and videos laying in his front seats.
I mean, that will be the same replay.
They always do that.
They blame Limbaugh 95.
They're getting ready to do it to me and Trump.
He's talking about Oklahoma City.
It's a whole bad rollout.
You know, it's like, how do you know McRibbs back at McDonald's?
I'll see the billboards.
You know, it's like, Hey, Oklahoma City, it's back.
This time we're blaming Alex Jones and Trump.
Get ready in the New York Times, Washington Post.
We're all getting death threats.
Oh, we're portable babies.
Oh my God.
Alex Jones wants to kill us.
You're lying sacks of garbage.
Also the McRibby is coming.
And so the false flag is a coming.
I hear the train a coming.
It's rolling around the bend and I ain't seen the sunshine since.
I don't know when I'm stuck in police state prison and Tom keeps dragging on.
I got to tell you, I bet there's rich folks eating in a fancy dining car.
They're probably drinking coffee and smoking big cigars.
You know, I knew I had it coming.
I knew I can't be free, but that train keeps the blowing and that's what tortures me.
Yeah, I was just a baby mama told me, son, always be a good boy.
Don't ever play with guns, but I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.
Oh my goodness.
We're going to go to bread and come back with your calls and then I've got a bunch
of other news I haven't gotten to yet.
I would say was that his parody version of Hey there, Delilah.
Yeah, yeah.
I don't know if it's a great idea to sing.
I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die on the same episode.
You commit.
You say that you killed a guy.
Come on.
Come on.
Seems like a weird you're making a connection that no one else could possibly have made
when he says he killed a guy and then he starts talking about killing a guy and then
sings a song about
prison blues.
Killing a guy.
That's, that's, there's no reason to connect those dots, Dan.
You're a conspiracy theorist.
It's just weird.
You're, you're a false flagging yourself.
I don't know.
I don't know that there's any like real connection and Lord knows we can never know what goes
on in the minds of weirdos like this, especially his, but like, dude, the idea that you're
doing that on like out of nowhere reciting dramatically the entire like most of the lyrics
to fall some prison blues when nary an hour and a half earlier, you said, I'd never killed
anybody.
Technically.
Technically.
There was one guy, technically.
That's fucked up.
This is super fucked up.
This is a weird episode.
So I am really starting to like Alex not allowed on a regular social media anymore, Alex.
I like it.
He's getting wild.
He's now back to the point where he fucking doesn't think he doesn't fucking give a shit.
Yeah.
No one's listening to this.
I could confess to murder.
Yeah.
Fuck it.
It's nuts.
So in this next clip, one of those abortions I did with my hand, I, I don't think this
will get us the million dollars.
Yeah.
Anything like that.
Okay.
But I do think that this would be a, maybe a piece of my argument that Alex is advocating
violence against his enemies.
Sure.
But if they start the civil war and start getting really, really violent with everybody, we're
going to have to really, you know, do what must be done.
So and we're just going to have to for our families and everybody else's future and everything
that would be very, very firm.
I take no pleasure in the fact that we're going to have to defend ourselves and I would
take no pleasure in, you know, if they had to come to my house or someone else's house
to attack me and to defend yourself, it's like stepping on a cockroach.
And I'm like, oh man, cockroach, I don't want to have a bunch of exterminators here.
Oh, come here, buddy.
I'm going to have to get a nap, get in just crush your head as quickly as possible and
get you in the trash can.
I mean, I don't like killing cockroaches and the media are a pack of liars.
I would never offensively attack anybody and they know it, but they're putting all of that
out there.
So I don't, you know, there's a rich tradition of calling your enemies cockroaches.
What does he think he's saying?
I think that he's, I think that he's saying that he's such a good guy that he would only,
if people came to his house, he would kill them, but wouldn't enjoy it.
But it seems like he's enjoying talking about it because he does it a lot.
Is that really, does he think that's in the plus column?
Does he think that's in a pro like, Hey, I wouldn't enjoy murdering them.
Only dogs.
Do I enjoy murdering?
And that one guy, that one guy really liked it.
I don't know, man.
It's a good idea at the time.
Yeah.
You know, we all, we all have like, you know, get rich, quick schemes that sound good in
the moment, killing a guy, any of these things, you know, we're all foolish having that eighth
shot.
Who knows?
Who knows?
Same thing.
Same thing.
Stupid.
But that's violent.
Like, I know that he's not threatening violence and he always couches it cowardly.
No, he's absolutely threatening violence.
He's just doing it in the trappings of somebody who's saying, who's saying, no, it's not even
that offensive defense.
It's not even that it's saying that I am suggesting that these people are so low and so evil that
my first preference is to save them.
But because they have gone so far, I now have no choice but to stomp them underneath my
boot.
Like a cockroach.
That means that not only are you now justified in murdering them, but not only that you can
then feel like you're taking the moral high ground for not enjoying murdering them, for
feeling as though it is one's duty as opposed to something that you delight in, like the
fucking psychopath you are.
And along the way, dehumanizing them by enemies or cockroaches.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
I mean, we heard earlier him saying that Soros thinks you're an animal and stuff like that
and quite frankly, the only people I ever hear dehumanizing people calling them animals
are Trump and Alex.
Weird.
That he's who dehumanizes people calling Omarosa a dog.
She's a dog.
Don't worry about it.
Calling everyone.
He disagrees.
That'd be hilarious.
If Alex called her Nock.
Nock.
I can't remember his other dog's name because Nock is too good.
Nock is too good.
Feel real bad for that.
Yeah.
Forgot the dog's name.
Yeah.
I just did the cross.
Yeah.
I saw it.
I saw it.
So he goes on even further here.
And like, so that is still like that last clip was couched in the like the auspices of
defensive violence and that's how he gets away with all this violent talk.
But in this next clip, what he's talking about, I don't know how someone could hear
this and not respond by thinking about like, well, we better fucking kill these people.
Let me just be a thousand percent clear.
I have security, so I'm not sitting there sleeping with a battle rifle on my bed.
But the idea that Twitter.
First of all, I just want to stop there to say that he always complains about celebrities
having armed guards.
And now he's saying, I have security.
I don't have a battle rifle by my bed.
Right.
So, well, yeah, security.
What are you doing?
But not like in a pussy way.
Right.
Right.
Yeah.
That it's violent to say that if you come to my house, trying to hurt me or my family
to defend myself, the crime to the left, the authoritarian's is standing up to them.
And so they see that as offensively violent.
If you're asleep in your bed and five armed men come to kill you, if you do not open your
chest and present it and kneel and kiss the antifa boot, you are a terrorist and a Nazi.
If you roll over and squeal and beg and say, you're a God, you're the most powerful human
on earth, antifa has defeated me.
They go good and then shove the rifle in your mouth and pull the trigger and go, ah, okay.
And then Jack Dorsey or I guess Twitter would say, oh, Alex is a liberal.
He likes the death camps in China.
He likes Tim Cook.
Oh, Alex is learning.
You're learning with the stimuli, Alex.
Fourth character.
You're learning the stimuli, my boy, and you're submitting.
Well, there might be a place for you and all of this, my boy, if you'll simply continue
along the current path of submission, British characters are as fast, no.
Fake laugh.
Well, no, because it's in character.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, what would you say?
Fake laugh.
We haven't heard of fake laugh in a while.
He hasn't felt fake laughter in a long time.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I want to, I want to say fake laugh, Dan.
Yeah.
I want to.
And the people want it.
Yeah.
The people.
Everybody loves it.
Yeah.
So I mean, that's gross.
I mean, the message that he's sort of putting out there is that like these enemies that
we have, this vision of antifa that I want you to be afraid of, they just want you to
submit to them.
And if you stand up to them, that's the greatest crime ever.
But if you submit to them, then they're going to kill you anyway.
So there is a message that he's putting out that is with these people, no matter what
you do, they're trying to kill you.
Right.
If that is the truth, it logically follows that you have to kill them.
Right.
I know that he's not saying kill these people or anything like that, because he's smart
enough to not do that most of the time.
But that is the message that people hear.
It's important that like, I know that you can't hold him responsible for what people
hear because of the way our laws work.
Sure.
And people airing on the side of free speech, which I support.
But it's ludicrous to say that he's not advocating violence.
It's absurd.
It's not legally actionable, but that is what he's doing.
It's what?
What?
What?
Do you want to go into the book of Deuteronomy?
I don't.
Like anyone who breaks these commandments shall then be put to death.
And fucking a dude is one of those commandments.
That's not ludicrous.
Oh, yeah.
You're right.
It's up your books.
It's the one that's all obsessed with laws and those guys with fucking assholes.
So is Leviticus.
I know, but Deuteronomy is anyways.
Leviticus was written by the Deuteronomists, so to speak, the fucking law-based class.
But that's like that idea of like, no, no, no.
I don't personally hate gay people.
I just believe that the Bible is a living, a true document and everything in it is literal
and should be taken as such.
And yeah, sure, the Bible says that they should be killed and I don't want to do it.
But I think that the Bible should be followed in all of its ways and I'm not advocating
violence.
I'm just saying that if you follow the Bible, it means that you should absolutely go.
It's a weird, like cowardly, sucks for you kind of thing.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah.
No, I love gay people.
Right.
It's God who hates them.
Look.
It's so weird, right?
Who am I to go against the word of God?
Oh, it'd be crazy.
Nuts.
What am I?
Please.
So, it's also, didn't he just give a perfect defense of why we should rise up and overthrow
our billionaire overlords?
Walk me through that.
Well, his, his idea there is that, of course, the only thing that they hate more than submission
is refusing to submit and they're going to kill you anyways.
And so your only option then is to kill that, right?
So what is, what is our billionaire overlord class other than somebody who is stamping
on all of our fucking throats, coming to our goddamn homes and murdering us?
If you borrow the rhetoric and sort of tweak it a little, yeah, I mean, I'm not, I mean,
not rhetoric.
I mean, just like the logical, right, right.
Follow through.
That's what I'm saying.
Yeah.
If you borrow it and tweak it a little, yeah, there's something to be said for that.
Yeah.
Speaking as someone who had Chase Bank steal my bread, basically, yeah, they came to your
house.
More or less.
Guys, stamp on your throat, steal $35 from you and or 30 is embarrassing.
And then they fucking put a gun in your mouth and said, deal with it.
Yeah.
More or less.
Yeah.
And I said, hooray.
Yeah.
And then did you do a British accent?
Oh, wait, mate.
No.
I don't do good British accents.
Crikey.
That's a good one.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
I'm going to be on SNL.
All right.
My third care.
Alex Jones is one of them.
Hey, how's it going?
ASMR.
Alex Jones.
That's actually a good character.
That legit is a good character.
That might come into my reel.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's going in there.
So in this next clip, we only got a couple left here.
We have this, this was not the result of like a fun ad pivot necessarily, but I wanted
to keep this in because he, we heard in our out of context drop a really angry sales pitch
where he's screaming about how great his deals are.
Yeah.
And this is how sort of buy this guy's ad.
This is just an indication of how all over the place he is throughout the show.
I'm going to bring him back right with your calls.
I promise I'm going to be a good boy today.
I'm going to take your calls.
Gross.
I haven't even plugged this hour.
If you don't finance this, they'll win, which whatever, it's all in God's plan.
We just got great supplements, great books, great films, great t-shirts, great everything.
And the big sales post-gen yesterday has a lot of stuff to sell out, like X twos, volatility
and brain forces, low and everything else, but that's a new specialist tomorrow.
The toothpaste, 50% off, fluoride free, close to a lot of four of a, it's all 40, 50% off
and free shipping.
Fight the bully.
Save the internet.
It's just fight the bully.
Save the internet.
It's just wrote.
Yeah.
Repetitive.
By our stuff.
So he's up.
He's up in these highs of screaming about how great the deals are.
And then like an hour later, he's, yeah, fucking stuff, just buy it.
Fuck.
Yeah.
You know, I, I don't trust, I don't trust the, the sales pitch of like, we have great
everything.
Like I would never yelling one.
No.
Like, like I would never, ever suggest that we have great, like every one of our episodes
is great.
Like if I was few misses, no, not even that.
I'm just saying like, uh, oh, you came to the show for Alex Jones and we're doing a
Jim Baker episode.
That doesn't mean that the Jim Baker episode isn't good.
It's just mean like maybe it's not for you.
Like, Hey, this colloidal silver is good.
Maybe it's good for you.
Maybe it's not good for other people.
Think about your own decisions in your own life and what you want to do and maybe you'll
like it.
Maybe you won't.
It's fine.
Live your own life.
Maybe that's why I'm a bad salesman.
Terrible sales.
That's a stare.
That's a terrible sales pitch.
Yeah.
And even like, I wanted to talk you back a little bit.
I wanted to be like, yeah, if you want Alex Jones, you might not like Jim Baker.
I mean, quite frankly, a lot of people, this whole show isn't for it.
So maybe you don't even like any of the stuff we do.
The sales person is trying to not get a sale.
Look, I, I like it.
I get it.
Why you don't might not accept that and I don't think you're wrong at all.
It's the same thing that I have to deal with with the spicy food a lot.
You know, like last night I went out and got some, uh, tie with a friend of the show,
Kevin Hogan.
Yeah.
And great friend of the show.
To wrestle with like the idea of like, Hey, uh, you want to care it?
You want one of these carrots and like I had to, I had to roll with the idea that like
I love really spicy stuff, but not everybody does.
Right.
In the same way I was trying to get you to eat one of my Thai peppers that I had, I've
grown and like it's just rude of me to expect you to enjoy that even though just because
I enjoy it.
Right.
And that's how I feel about our podcast.
This is why we are terrible.
Yeah.
We're destined for failure.
Yeah.
Anyway, you got one more clip here, Jordan.
And, uh, so I told you that, uh, the reason that I came back to the present day and decided
to stick around here for a little while was I wanted to see Alex's approach to the Cohen
and Manafort news on the day.
Right.
Right.
Um, and towards the end of the show, he gets the news, finally touches on it and he's
got a really rock solid position, uh, on Cohen because the Manafort stuff hasn't broken yet
by the time, uh, by the time Paul Joseph Watson takes over.
It was a, it was a strange, it was a strange three hour period we all lived through.
Right.
Yep.
And Alex had already, uh, hit the whiskey, uh, hot toddies, uh, and let Paul Joseph Watson
take over.
But he does say this before he gets off here.
They're saying that Michael Cohen, Trump's one of his many lawyers, one of his disgrace
lawyers who've been caught lying.
You name it.
Not like, not like Rudy Giuliani, one of his disgrace lawyers.
You should probably at most have one lawyer who has been disgraced and caught lying.
You should not have one of many lawyers who has been caught lying dicey with his taxi
company.
Nothing to do with Trump.
They've got him.
They claim on money laundering because his business partner didn't pay taxes.
Nope.
Probably nothing.
But the point is Cohen's been chomping at the bit now to actually champion record Trump
and then Trump's like financing.
I'm not paying for anything.
So the, you know, the tapes actually exonerated, but CNN is saying Cohen to plead guilty to
criminal charges and that he's not rolled.
So I don't know.
I mean, when you get to disinformation organizations like CNN and ABC together, if they had a baby,
they had a baby.
It would look something like Brian Stelter.
So that's an ugly baby, uh, and a very despicable baby as well.
I love that.
He's like, it's an ugly baby.
And a dishonest little baby as well.
It's like Alex, where is your God damn analysis?
What are you doing?
It's an ugly baby that also lies.
It's dishonest ugly baby.
Your favorite guy is lawyer, just pled guilty to a bunch of shit that clearly involves him.
That he's so, his analysis is like, wow, ABC at CNN are reporting it.
And if they fucked it, have an ugly baby, you've got so much nothing, you have so much
nothing.
What is it going to delightful?
How little he's got like in that moment, it's, it's crazy.
What is it going to take man?
How much smoke before even people who are on fire are like, all right, I guess there's
fire.
I don't know.
I think for Alex, it's the, the sky is the limit.
You know, it's, I think it, I don't, I don't, I have no idea what it would take for him.
It was bombing Syria where he thought that Russians got killed.
That turned out to be what, you know, we can talk all day about the idea that when Trump
bombed Syria, Alex, the famous Trump shoves ISIS up his dirty asshole.
Which again, he's now getting Michael Cohen's dirty asshole shoved up his own dirty asshole.
Certainly.
Like our sort of point on that, and I think it's a fair assumption to make is that Alex
got on air, he was kind of buzzed and he did all that stuff.
And then Roger talked him down, which is a reasonable assumption to make.
Yeah.
But I think it's equally reasonable to assume because of the way that Alex was talking that
night about how there's tons of Russians who got killed in the bombings.
Yeah.
Because that's the assumption that he was making.
Yeah.
And then the next day when he found out there weren't any Russians killed, he doubles back.
So I think it's equally plausible that what it will take for him to turn on Trump is Trump
actually attacking Russia or Trump turning on Russia.
Yeah.
I don't mean that to say that Alex is an agent of Russia or anything like that, but the last
time that he did, quote unquote, turn on Trump, most of his motivation was he killed a bunch
of Russian soldiers in that bombing.
Right.
So I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know, man.
It's so, it's so weird to me.
Trump turning on Israel would do it too.
No.
I think Trump could turn on Israel and Alex would be fine with it.
I'm not sure at this point.
I don't know.
I think he could have years ago, but I don't know at this point.
I don't know what Trump turning on Israel would even look like though.
Like, we're moving the embassy back.
Right.
Like, what would even that be?
Like, hey, we don't support you expanding your settlements illegally into the place
where you're illegally expanding your settlements.
Like that's what he's just doing the right thing.
The Israeli said other capital will now be in Boca Raton.
Yeah.
That actually sounds right.
Sure.
Wanted close to Mar-a-Lago.
We have, we have decided that Israel is a Florida.
Come on over.
Get on over here.
It's your holy land.
Why not?
Who cares?
You forgot is nothing.
It sucks because the joke I was trying to make was about the idea that that's close
to Mar-a-Lago and like all that.
It's close enough.
It's pretty close.
Oh, I didn't know that.
That's a vacation sort of fun place.
Sure.
But the...
Yeah, let's move Israel there.
But the unfortunate part about it is that like there's such that stereotype of old
Jews end up retiring in Florida.
Yeah, that's true.
Now I do feel...
I feel ugly about the...
No, I agree with you.
That was just the first place I thought of where it would just make sense to move a whole
shit ton of people because who gives a fuck?
It's Florida.
A swamp.
Yeah.
Toss them in there.
Give them North Carolina.
It's funny that Trump wants to drain the swamp when he comes from a place that's very close
to a ton of swamp land.
Yeah.
He is the swamp.
That's my big bit.
Abandon hope all you who enter the swamp.
Oh boy.
I tell you what, Jordan, you've come to the end of this episode.
Yeah.
It's been a doozy.
Just to put a button on that last clip, most of the news hadn't broken about Cohen yet.
It's really funny to hear him make that sort of thing before it comes out that in court
he had said that he was working at the behest of Trump.
A candidate.
A candidate.
Excuse me.
A candidate for president.
There were at least four.
And everybody knows that Hillary would have loved nothing more than for Cohen to have
paid off a porn star who fucked Trump and avoided telling her story.
That makes sense.
Or.
Or.
Gary Johnson.
Gary Johnson is the mastermind down.
He's the mastermind.
We never know.
They never know.
I think we will know very shortly.
I think we already kind of know.
We know pretty much right on.
So this has been a fun episode.
I hate the present still and the show sucks.
And most of the show, the stuff that we didn't go over is just repetition yelling about China
and shit.
Yeah.
Alex probably killed a guy and that's all.
Like you.
No.
No.
No.
He technically killed a guy.
Technically didn't murder him.
He technically didn't murder him, but he did technically kill a guy.
It seems that way.
It not probably technically, but technically he killed a guy.
So now you understand fully why we had to do this episode.
Yeah.
He fucking killed a guy.
This is very important to our investigation of Alex.
This is going on the real.
This is what we call in baseball.
This is an unforced error.
This is.
That's not what we call it in baseball.
Yeah.
It is.
No, that's tennis.
Oh, an unforced error.
Isn't there?
Isn't that in?
No, in baseball, it's just a regular error.
Oh, really?
In tennis, it's an unforced error.
Tennis is baseball with a bigger bat.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
Uh-uh.
What?
What?
No.
Tennis.
No.
No.
What?
Tennis is baseball with a fat bat.
That's a.
You got to get a shirt.
Tennis is baseball with a fat bat.
Picture of you playing tennis.
I don't think that's a good.
I don't think that's a good sell.
Picture of you in the Albert Poole stance.
I think.
With a.
Look.
With a tennis racket.
Look, our, our call Larry Nichols shirt, which does not exist in probably never will.
We got to design that thing.
That one is an in joke.
Uh, that shirt is just esoteric nonsense.
Tennis is baseball with a fat bat.
See now, that's a song.
That sounds like Mr.
That's a song we should write.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You can do it kind of to the rhythm of little in the middle, but you got much back.
Tennis is a baseball with a fat bat.
All right.
Fuck this.
Alex killed a guy.
That's our new out.
That's our new out on any, on any bit that doesn't land in the way we want to do it.
Anyways, Alex killed a guy.
Let's retire the telling people to fuck themselves because I think that's gotten a little stale.
Right.
We end every episode by reminding the audience that Alex killed a guy.
Well, then I guess, I guess it's your turn.
Uh,
We have a website.
Knowledge bike.com.
We're on Twitter.
Right.
We're on Facebook.
We are.
We have a Facebook group.
Go home and tell your mother.
You're brilliant.
That's correct.
We're also on iTunes.
You can find us.
You can find us.
You can't find Alex.
Nope.
He's hidden.
Uh-huh.
But guys, we've had a lot of fun here and, uh, but just to end things on a very serious
note, we need to remind you that Alex Jones has killed a guy.
William Kansas.
You're on the air.
Thanks for holding.
Hello, Alex.
I'm a first-time caller.
I'm a huge fan.
I love your work.
I love you.