Life Kit - A Saner Mindset For Weight Loss

Episode Date: November 26, 2019

The way many of us think about weight loss is totally counter-productive. Focus on healthy habits you can sustain instead of the numbers on the scale.Learn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

What's in store for the music, TV, and film industries for 2025? We don't know, but we're making some fun, bold predictions for the new year. Listen now to the Pop Culture Happy Hour podcast from NPR. Is this Molly Wernick? This is, in fact, Molly Wernick. Molly Wernick is a Life Kit listener. I thought, wow, this is very practical knowledge. I wanted to talk to her because she listened to an episode and something really cool happened.

Molly had some loans from school and credit card debt and wasn't really making a ton of progress paying those off. But then she heard about two debt repayment strategies on LifeKit. I think it was the avalanche strategy and the snowball strategy. And so the snowball strategy really appealed to me because it said, take the loan with the lowest balance and pay it off as quickly as possible. She thought, hey, I could try that, this snowball strategy. It sounded doable. I made, I think, the biggest payment I've ever made of anything in my life from my bank account, I think. Then in a matter of minutes, my loan was totally paid off. And what did that feel like?

Good. It's exciting. It's like, okay, well, I can do this. Like, what's next? It's actually making a difference in the way that I can spend an extra $250 a month. Now I'm one step closer to being debt-free. That is super cool. And we want to make more Life Kit episodes so you can feel the way that Molly feels.

And to do that, we need your support. Make a donation to your NPR station today. Just go to donate.npr.org slash life kit to give. This is NPR's Life Kit. About 10 years ago, I wanted to lose some weight, so I found this cabbage soup diet. Twice a week, I would just eat cabbage soup all day long, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I boiled some onions and cabbage, obviously, and garlic and vegetable broth. And then I blended it up. And that is all I ate. Yeah, I did that. And after all that, I didn't reach my goal weight.

I lost some weight, but I've never been able to lose weight fast. And eating this cabbage soup just drove me nuts. And after a while, I gave up. And the weight I'd lost came back. We do try this all-or-nothing approach, where all-or-nothing, you know, almost always brings you back to nothing. That's Dr. Yoni Friedhoff. He's an obesity medicine doctor in Ottawa. And he says the way our culture thinks about weight loss is all wrong. It all sort of boils back into the mindset that suffering is required long term, and that if you are not capable of suffering long term, it's because you personally are a failure,

that you are not trying hard enough, you don't want it badly enough, you don't care enough, and that's nonsense. Because that approach just leads to failure and feeling bad about ourselves. This is your NPR Life Kit on rethinking weight loss. I'm Maria Godoy, and I cover health and science for NPR. In this episode, we're going to talk about why the way many of us think about weight loss is totally counterproductive, and why managing weight in a healthy way might mean not thinking so much about your weight at all. The scale measures the gravitational pull of the earth at a given moment in time. The scale doesn't measure health, happiness, success, effort, or self-worth. So if you're looking for the newest version of that cabbage soup diet, yeah, this is not it.

But if you want to hear what I've learned that's helped me figure out how to keep a weight I'm happy with long term without being miserable, and that's the key, well, stick with us. The Indicator is a podcast where daily economic news is about what matters to you. Workers have been feeling the sting of inflation. So as a new administration promises action on the cost of living, taxes and home prices. The S&P 500 biggest post-election day spike ever. Follow all the big changes and what they mean for you. Make America affordable again. Listen to The Indicator, the daily economics podcast from NPR.

Okay, so there's a typical pattern to weight loss. And if you've ever gone on a diet, you've probably experienced it. Basically, people lose weight for the first four to six months, and then they hit a plateau, and then slowly they start to regain some or all of the weight they lost. And sometimes they end up heavier than they started. There are a lot of biological reasons why weight loss is hard, but there are some things we can control to an extent, and those are the strategies and mindset we use when approaching weight loss. One problem is that a lot of weight loss strategies start like mine did,

with that cabbage soup diet or the cayenne pepper diet. Yeah, remember that, Queen Bey? Or some other crazy fad diet. Like, I wasn't planning to eat cabbage soup forever, you know, just until the weight came off. But after about a month, pizza started to look real, real good to me, like whole pie good. It's hard to be restrictive for a very long time. That's Gary Bennett. He's a psychology professor and obesity researcher at Duke University. And he told me there's research showing that people kind of rebound after being on a really strict diet, even if that diet's more balanced than what I did. And naturally, people start to move back into moderation. And then sometimes that

goes into a little bit more consumption. And then, you know, things get a little bit off track. So what Gary and Yoni both tell their patients, and this is takeaway number one. Things that are not done for good in the name of weight management lead to temporary results. And that's not generally what people are looking for. In other words, keeping weight off long term only happens if you like the lifestyle that gets you to that weight. So much so that you actually stick to it. Short-term crash diets, they're really not sustainable. Unless you like the life you're living while you're losing your weight, you're probably not going to keep living that way. And

as a consequence, that weight that you've lost will come back. And it was that philosophical shift that led me to the practice I suppose that I run today, which is focused not on particular body weight goals, it's not on the body mass index, it's not on a particular diet, but rather it's trying to work with patients as individuals to figure out the healthiest life they can honestly enjoy? So if you're looking to lose weight and you go to Yoni's practice, the first thing he would tell you go to Yoni's practice, the first thing he would tell you is to stop thinking about weight itself. Like that number on the scale,

just don't worry about it. We don't aim people at any numbers whatsoever in our office as far as pounds on a scale or body mass indices or body fat percentages or clothing sizes. I think all of the numbers are risky. Risky because our bodies and our genes are all built differently. Plus, our job demands are different. Our environments are different. Our caregiving responsibilities are different. And all of that can affect our weight loss efforts. So aiming for a specific number can set a lot of us up to fail.

That's why Yoni says, and this is takeaway number two, forget goal weights. Instead, focus on behavior goals. The analogy I'll use regularly in my office is takeaway number two. Forget goal weights. Instead, focus on behavior goals. The analogy I'll use regularly in my office is one of school. So if you've got a kid in school, you know, that kid's best grade is going to be whatever grade they get when they go to class, do their homework, and study their best. But by no means does everybody trying their best in school get an A+. That's just not how it works. And so the goal setting needs to be around the going to class, doing your homework, and studying, and also needs to be realistic. Yoni loves a good analogy, and you're going to hear a few from him in this episode. But in this case, when he says doing your homework, he means adopting healthy behaviors.

For example, he really recommends trying to cook at home more often. As for Gary, he gives his patients a simple list of changes they can choose from. For instance, stop sugary beverage consumption. It's huge for most people. Reduce alcohol intake, you know, no more than one drink per night. I can do that. Stop. It's harder. Harder for me, baby. You know, stop eating chips, cookies, and candy, right? Just those three. No fast food. You do like four or five of those, and you'll get pretty close to that 500-calorie deficit each day. A calorie deficit. That just means you're taking in fewer calories than you burn, and that's how you lose weight.

But the weight loss isn't the focus here. The idea is that making these changes can make you healthier regardless of how much weight you lose, or even if you don't lose any weight at all. In other words, they're goals worth pursuing in and of themselves, and they're less likely to make you obsessive. Of course, changing our behavior is easier said than done, and this gets us to takeaway number three. Don't try to overhaul your behavior all at once.

Instead, start small and let those changes snowball. When it comes to weight management specifically, people are so keen to suddenly have a black belt that they forget to get a black belt. You start with a white belt and fall down a whole bunch and slowly, slowly over time with a lot of repetition, you build a skill set. And I think healthy living

is the same. And when people try to suddenly have a black belt without taking that time to build up to it, you know, they usually struggle and stop. For a lot of people, Yoni says a good place to start is to just figure out what you're eating. I think one of the first things a person can do, just like they would be doing if they were unhappy with their bank balance at the end of every month, trying to understand what their spending patterns look like would be a great first step. And I think the same is true about eating patterns and eating habits. Now, I am a fan of using food diaries. I realize that it's not for everybody, but doing it for a few weeks would be a very eye-opening thing for a lot of people

where people will be keeping track of what they're eating, when they're eating, how much they're eating. Now, as Yoni said, food diaries are not for everyone. If you have a history of eating disorders or tend to become obsessive

about counting calories, stay away from them because this could trigger you. But if you can look at the data dispassionately, without self-judgment, food tracking can help you get to know yourself and your habits. That's when you can start taking stock of what you may or may not be able to change. For instance, maybe there's a food you can cut back on. A couple of years ago, I started food tracking, and I quickly realized that I was pouring about 400 calories worth of creamer into my coffee every

morning. That was really eye-opening. So I cut back and eventually realized just a spoonful was enough. But a lot of people do find tracking their food to be tedious. Even Gary does. That's why he tells his patients to track their goals instead. I once had a patient who just tracked every day. She got a day planner and just put a smiley face or a sad face on the day planner each day. And if she thought she was doing pretty well hitting her goals that day, she wrote a happy face. And if she wasn't, she wrote a sad face. And she did wonderfully and felt really good about her progress. And she would tell you, I just look at the day planner and I can figure out all the trends. And there's another reason to focus on meeting smaller goals.

They're actually achievable, so it sets you up to be able to celebrate small victories. Gary remembers one day when he walked into one of the health centers he works at and one of his patients waved him over. This woman comes over and, you know, doctor, doc, doc, doc, doc, and she was shaking this thing at me and I didn't know what was happening

and I realized that she was shaking a pedometer doc, doc. And she was shaking this thing at me and I didn't know what was happening. And I realized that she was shaking a pedometer in my face. And she was saying, look at my steps. Look at my steps. I hit 13,000. I hit 13,000. And then she immediately started voguing. I mean, she was like striking all the model poses and the whole thing. And she's like, look, you know, I lost some weight, but I've still kept it.

Jack's, you know, I've got my Michelle arms, and she's just doing the whole thing. And so we sat and talked for a while, and she just followed these really simple goals. One of the simple goals Gary likes to offer his patients is brisk activity. This patient certainly embraced that, and accomplishing it kept her motivated to keep going. Over time, you can work your way up to black belt level lifestyle changes if you want, and what those are are going to look different for different people. It could be cooking most of the food you eat yourself, or running a marathon, or playing kickball with your kid after school. That's actually what my husband does.

Yoni says the key is to stick with the types of changes you most enjoy. Okay, so doing all these things, cutting out sugary drinks, cooking more, getting in your steps, they can start moving the numbers on the scale. But, of course, a lot of the pressure to lose weight in our society is about looking a certain way. And these strategies probably won't get you dramatic weight loss. Does anybody come into your office looking for that kind of weight loss, like the 50 pounds or more or not? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. People do. And what do you tell them? We usually tell them that a safe amount of weight loss is one to two pounds a week. You know, an amount of weight loss that will improve your health is

somewhere somewhere in that five percent range. And and you know, people aren't always satisfied with that, I'll be honest. There are some people who are utterly relieved by it, but others aren't really satisfied with it. But studies show that roughly 90% of people who set out to lose weight don't end up losing more than 5% to 10% of their body weight long term. Bigger losses do happen, but they're not the common experience. The challenge that we have at a societal level is that most people are thinking about losing weight for aesthetic reasons. And those types of weight losses, people often want

to be much larger than what's required to improve health. We also know that their physicians will tell them that they should lose more weight than is healthy. Gary isn't like that. If a patient with obesity doesn't have any health problems and isn't interested in losing weight, he simply recommends maintaining their current weight as a goal. Of course, concerns about your appearance and the weight stigma people face in the world, they can be really hard to overcome. But when it comes to health, and this is takeaway number four,

studies show small weight losses can make a big difference. Weight loss of just about 3% of your body weight can really meaningfully improve your health. It can change your blood pressure. It can improve your diabetes. It can keep pre-diabetes from becoming diabetes. It can reduce your cholesterol. So even smaller weight losses than most people imagine can really meaningfully affect health. And I think that's a real win. Okay, I'm going to get a little personal here. So two years ago, roughly, I decided to start

making some healthy lifestyle changes. And I would be lying if I said weight loss wasn't one of my goals. But more than that, I just wanted to feel strong. I wanted to be able to run in the park with my kids and keep up. I wanted my knees not to hurt all the time. So I started off by making small changes that I enjoyed, like taking a walk during my lunch break. As a science and health journalist, I knew all the factors I was up against in trying to lose weight. So I decided not to focus on a specific number on the scale, deliberately. Two years later, I've actually lost more weight than I expected to be able to.

And I'm still technically a little overweight. But I am totally cool with that. Because not only can I keep up with my kids these days, I can outrun those suckers. And Yoni has this idea that's really helped me to stop judging myself. It's a concept he calls best weight. And this is our final takeaway. Takeaway number five. A person's best weight is whatever weight they reach when they live the healthiest life they can actually enjoy.

And Yoni says the healthiest life you can enjoy is going to vary from day to day and from one person to the next. For example, the healthiest life you can enjoy on your birthday is going to be different from the healthiest life you can enjoy on any given Thursday. Me personally, these days I typically avoid cake, but when my kid turned five, yeah, I had a slice. You know, food's not just fuel. Food is comfort. Food is celebration. Food literally reduces our body's stress hormone levels. Food is the world's oldest social network. And to suggest that we need to exclusively eat in the name of health denies the importance of all those things. And I think those things are hugely important.

That's why Yoni says he's actually written prescriptions for chocolate, fried chicken, even beer. Yoni says you want to think about your life. Think about the healthiest foods you can eat and still be happy. Think about the kinds of exercise you truly enjoy. And just do that. The world has been told and is still constantly being told that the goal for weight loss is total weight loss. I've used the analogy before the Boston Marathon

where, you know, to qualify for the Boston Marathon, you need to be a very, very fast runner. Now, Yoni himself is a runner, but he admits he would never qualify for the Boston Marathon. But that doesn't mean he's going to quit running because he actually enjoys it. In weight management, we are all programmed to believe we should all be qualifying for the Boston Marathon of weight loss.

That's just not reality. So even if you never get to a weight that the BMI charts say you should be at or some goal weight in your head, that doesn't mean you should stop doing things that will make you healthier. Just make sure you actually like doing those things. For me, I could probably drop a few more pounds if I went on some super restrictive diet, but I'm not going to do that because I refuse to be miserable. This is my life and I plan to enjoy it. Alright, so that's it for this episode. Let's recap what we learned.

Takeaway number one. Keeping weight off long-term means liking the lifestyle that helped you lose the weight in the first place. So forget about short-term crash diets. Things that are not done for good in the name of weight management lead to temporary results. And that's not generally what people are looking for. Takeaway number two, forget about goal weights or what the BMI chart says you should weigh. Instead, set goals around healthy behaviors. So the goal is not the destination. The goal is the road. How are you going to get there? Takeaway number three, don't try to tackle big, ambitious lifestyle changes all at once.

Instead, start with small, achievable goals and let them snowball. And she was saying, look at my steps, look at my steps, I hit 13,000, I hit 13,000. And then she immediately started voguing. I mean, she was striking all the model poses. Takeaway number four, if you're losing weight for health reasons, losing just 3% of your weight can have a big impact. It can change your blood pressure. It can improve your diabetes.

It can keep pre-diabetes from becoming diabetes. It can reduce your cholesterol. And our final takeaway, takeaway five. Instead of thinking about a goal weight, think about your best weight. Your best weight is whatever weight you reach when you're living the healthiest life you can honestly enjoy. For more NPR Life Kit, check out our other episodes on health. There's one about how to get the best from your doctor,

how to start an exercise habit, and much more. You can find those at npr.org slash Life Kit. And while you're there, subscribe to our newsletter so you don't miss an episode. And here, as always, a completely random tip. This time from Life Kit project coordinator Claire Schneider. My tip is to get yourself some kitchen scissors. I like to use them to cut up pizza. They're way better than pizza cutters. And you can also use them to cut up herbs and green onions. So yeah, get some. Useful. And hey, we want to hear from you. Have you used the Life Kit tip in your life? Email us your story at lifekit at npr.org or tweet at us at NPR Life Kit. This episode was produced by Elisa Escarce. Megan Cain is the managing producer. Beth Donovan is

the senior editor. Our digital editor is Beck Harlan and our project coordinator is Claire Schneider. I'm Maria Godoy. Thanks for listening. which is why teams at one-third of Fortune 500 companies use Grammarly. With top-tier security credentials and 15 years of experience in responsible AI, Grammarly isn't just another AI communication assistant. It's how companies like yours increase productivity while keeping data protected and private. See why 70,000 teams trust Grammarly at grammarly.com slash enterprise.