Mark Bell's Power Project - EP. 577 - Are You Making Happiness A Priority?

Episode Date: August 19, 2021

Today we're asking whether or not you place happiness on your list of priorities. Sometimes people are trying to accomplish things without asking themselves if it will make them happy. We're sharing ways you can find happiness and how we've been able to manage to stay happy. Subscribe to the Podcast on on Platforms! ➢ https://lnk.to/PowerProjectPodcast Special perks for our listeners below! ➢Marek Health: https://marekhealth.com Use code POWERPROJECT15 for 15% off ALL LABS! Also check out the Power Project Panel: https://marekhealth.com/powerproject Use code POWERPROJECT for $101 off! ➢Eat Rite Foods: http://eatritefoods.com/ Use code "POWERPROJECT25" for 25% off your first order, then code "POWERPROJECT" for 10% off every order after! ➢LMNT Electrolytes: http://drinklmnt.com/powerproject ➢Piedmontese Beef: https://www.piedmontese.com/ Use Code "POWERPROJECT" at checkout for 25% off your order plus FREE 2-Day Shipping on orders of $150 Subscribe to the Power Project Newsletter! ➢ https://bit.ly/2JvmXMb Follow Mark Bell's Power Project Podcast ➢ Insta: https://www.instagram.com/markbellspowerproject ➢ https://www.facebook.com/markbellspowerproject ➢ Twitter: https://twitter.com/mbpowerproject ➢ LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/powerproject/ ➢ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/markbellspowerproject ➢TikTok: http://bit.ly/pptiktok FOLLOW Mark Bell ➢ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marksmellybell ➢ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkBellSuperTraining ➢ Twitter: https://twitter.com/marksmellybell ➢ Snapchat: marksmellybell ➢Mark Bell's Daily Workouts, Nutrition and More: https://www.markbell.com/ Follow Nsima Inyang ➢ https://www.breakthebar.com/learn-more ➢YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/NsimaInyang ➢Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nsimainyang/?hl=en ➢TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@nsimayinyang?lang=en Follow Andrew Zaragoza on all platforms ➢ https://direct.me/iamandrewz #PowerProject #Podcast #MarkBell

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chasing happiness. Some people talk about, um, you know, whether it's a good idea or not to, um, chase happiness, which is kind of a weird word or wording. Um, but for lack of better, a better terminology, um, I'll just use that. I think, I think sometimes if you're trying to chase after something that you have an expectation for, I think sometimes that can be a little disastrous because you can have an expectation that this is going to quote unquote, like make me happy or lead to me being happier. I hear people kind of say it all the time, like, oh, as soon as I move into my new house or new apartment, I'm going to be much happier. Or as soon as I, you know, if I got a raise, I would be way happier. If I did this, I'd be way happier.

And I think it's just important to know that you have control and agency over your own happiness. And the way to seek happiness is kind of up to you. It's all like kind of opportunity. It's an opportunity. things, situations that might lead me to be happy or happier. I could, for example, say, oh, I'd love to get together with my family. I'd love to, you know, have a barbecue. And that's going to, it's kind of almost more like for me, I guess, rather than thinking about being happy, it's more like, I think this will be fun. And I'm hoping that it'll be fun for everybody. like, I think this will be fun and I'm hoping that it'll be fun for everybody. And if everyone's having a good time, then maybe that'll help me to be more happy. Yeah. And I think because you

already have such a good mindset, you are looking at it significantly better than what a, I guess I'll just say a majority of people. So like you said, as soon as I get this raise, I'm going to be happy. If somebody said that, then they're going to strive to get a raise, which could potentially put them in a better spot. The other side where I think people get lost in this is, man, if I take out this loan or I get approved for this car, that's going to make me happy. And that puts them into a shit ton of debt. They get it. They can't get out of that loan. And they realize that they're equally as unhappy. So I think when people are thinking that they're chasing happiness or something's going to make them happy, they're not really stopping to think about what actually does make them happy.

I know for myself in the past, I have had really expensive cars and they were cool. But my happiest times were when I was driving a shitbox, for lack of better terms, that had no car payment. I was like, dude, I'm going to ride this car till the wheels fall off. And it was amazing because every time I got in the car, I just got happy. When I had a really high car payment, I'd be like, man, fuck, this car doesn't get as good as gas as the sticker said it was. It doesn't have as much leg room as the commercial said it's supposed to have. And all these things, I would nitpick at the smallest, dumbest things. I can't even put my cell phone in the right spot because it falls off or whatever it is. And I just found myself

super unhappy. But had I just sat there and realized, I just need a car that's going to get me to the gym and I'll be fine. And then after that, it's like all the extra happiness that came from the other car was diminished because I was so unhappy at like being stressed at the car payments and stuff. So instead of trying to get something that made me happy, I chased something that I thought was going to make me happy. But once I got there, I was like, oh, this actually kind of sucks. And I was kind of back to being where I was before I had a car you know I mean yeah no I I get what you're saying when you say that you know the the interesting thing about like I don't know trying to be happy or trying to

or doing things to be happy is like I think I kind of used to focus or used to really think of like, Oh, what's going to make me happy. Like when I, when I was in college and I saw that I was, I was trying to, I was studying to go towards being a doctor. But then when I worked in the hospital, I saw their lives. And even though they're making a lot of money, like a lot of them were like, I don't get to do the things that I'd, I'd like to be doing in those moments. I thought, Oh, they must, they're, they're not happy. But kind of what I realized later is that they, they, although they were doing, they had jobs that, you know, were making great money. Some of them didn't find fulfillment from it anymore or like that much meaning from it anymore. Um, and it's not

the place that they want it to be. Um, so, uh, like for, for me, what I try to do is like, like things that make me, I'm not even gonna say happy, but things that bring me fulfillment are, are exercising. Like I feel accomplished after I exercise. Um, I feel, uh, fulfilled after we do a beneficial podcast episode, that's going to go out and be able to help people. And when I see the comments of people that are helped from like some of the things that guests that we have on information that they heard that brings me fulfillment and meaning. And that makes me happy. Um, when I do jujitsu and I'm continuously seeking a goal that I continue to fail at, but then I have improvement over something that makes me feel

fulfilled and then I feel happy. So I know like I have this goal of getting a Tesla, right? But I know that once I get that Tesla, it's going to be sick to drive it for a few days. And then the level of happiness and brings me goes from here. It'll still be sick. It'll still be sick. Don't get me wrong. But it's not going to be anything compared to the consistent actions of going to the gym or being good on my nutrition so that it yields the body or going to jujitsu. It won't yield any of that, right?

But it's a sick thing to want to have you know makes a lot of sense um when you talked about the tesla right there it just kind of reminded me of when we had our boy uh bo high tower in the gym and uh his uh now wife is one of the most beautiful women I think I've ever seen. Like up close, like she's just gorgeous. She's very, very pretty. And, uh, Bo just like was so nonchalant about her. Like she was like in, in the, uh, she's in the conference room. And, um, my brother's like asking her like, hey, like you want like water or whatever, like you need anything? And Bo's like, oh, no, no, no, she's fine. He's like, don't worry about it. Like, and it's just funny

because like what you're talking about, like after you're with somebody for a period of time or after you have this Tesla, like, you know, after a while, you don't care about it as much. So I think it is important. One of the most important things you can ever work on is your mind and is your mindset. And to have a mindset that works in concert with having some equanimity where you can be pretty even regardless of what life throws your way,

is probably one of the greatest skill sets that you could ever have to not be moved. It's not to not have emotion, but it's to choose emotions and choose reactions based off those emotions that serve you and to really try not to do anything else. It's, you know, very, it's very difficult to be that way. It's very difficult to behave that way. But if you practice it and you work on it, a great place to practice it is actually through social media. You know, when you look at social media and look at posts, sometimes people are moved or get upset over religious stuff on online or political stuff online and you could or even stuff with with the cocoa virus you know you can you can choose to be know, moved by that in a certain direction,

or you can choose to not have it move you in a certain direction. On the same note, you can choose happiness. Like when you get in your car, you have a radio, everyone's got a radio and some people even have, you know, um, a lot of songs and a lot of music on their phone. You could, or you could listen to a podcast. I mean, you could choose to listen to a comedian. You could choose to be laughing or to have like fun. But, you know, maybe you choose instead, maybe you choose a sad song, you know? And so, the choices are, they're kind of there for you to, you know, whenever you want the opportunity to kind of go for them, you can go for them. But I agree with what you said, Nseema, about you have some of these things that are fulfilling.

And those are things that can lead to happiness. Exercise, which I would say exercise and actually physically doing stuff is almost like in a different category a little bit because those things really move the needle in terms of what they do for us from a hormonal standpoint. And when you have a cascade of hormones heading in the right direction, one could argue like it literally kind of does make you feel better. Something I was thinking about the other day when I was taking a shower, I was like, you know, a shower is an amazing thing. Like it feels so good and we take it for granted so much. And I'm just like, you know, I'm going to start doing just because I can. I'm going to start doing two showers every day. I usually just do one. But I was like, this is something I have control over. This feels amazing.

I love to take a shower. So I'm like, you know, a lot of times you just feel like you're going to be inconvenienced by it. But I'm like, it makes me feel better. It, you know, in the morning, it's a good wake up for me to before I go and run stuff like that. So try to find things that you know that are going to make you feel better. And I think if you can feel better, you'll most likely be a little happier. You know, it's funny you mentioned the shower thing because that's something that, for example, whenever I go on lives or whatever, the things I ask people to do whenever they come in is mention one thing that they're grateful for before anything. Just a common one thing you're grateful for, et cetera, et cetera. things that you're, you're grateful for, you automatically realize how much you actually have. Um, because I think that our general mode of being on our day to day is to look at things and be like, ah, that's such a dope Tesla. I wish I had one. You're like, or all these things like you wish you had and you see people have, especially now with social media, you know, like you see all

the things you don't have, all the money you don't have, all the the women or whatever you don't have. You see it all right. And it makes you think that you don't have much or you're not doing much or you're a loser, etc. But just like thinking of something like that, like, yeah, showers are dope. Like a majority of the world does not have access to showers. When I was in Nigeria, I was using a bucket and pouring cold water over me and scrubbing my body because we didn't have a shower over there. Right. So that's one simple thing that you can realize. Number one, how much you got, how, what you have to be grateful for, and that can immediately put you in a good mood for the day. Yeah, absolutely. And then the other side of that is like anything that

is bothering you um you know we talked about diminishing experiences or whatever um so we have a whole episode talking about this type of thing but like um the other day so i have this really cool thing about breaking mirrors in this house for some reason. I've broken two very, very big mirrors since we moved here. Extremely frustrating. Pisses me off. Fucking ruined my whole day. Real quick. So we have a step.

I actually love when you get mad, Andrew. And it's so funny because I know you do. But we have a step right here. And I'm being extra careful because I'm like, don't be the dumbass that breaks another one of these mirrors because it's really tall, really big, hard to replace. I'm being extra careful.

As I take the very last step, it catches the corner of this step. It's like a tile step. It's fucked it all up. I was so mad because we had just got done moving uh two pieces of furniture to find a spot for this damn mirror and i'm just like i was so frustrated and then you know as time passed i'm just like dude really like is it really that bad like stop and think

about it for a second it's like no it doesn't fucking matter like it literally does not matter but in that moment i was like this i'm so stupid i'm so frustrated uh so in that moment i was really mad and unhappy but then as time passed i was just like it's actually not that big of a deal and then i was back to my smiling self but boy did i let it get the best of me because like i was tired we had just got done moving like a big old bookcase and an armoire which i don't even know what the fuck that thing's for but it's here and after we did all this shit moved things around i had to move it all back so that like made it worse but at the end of the day like it wasn't that big of a deal and you know in that moment i was just like you know there'd be no way for me to diminish my experience but i did later on that day and i was just like yeah you're an idiot for getting

so upset but um so kind of doing like the opposite of what you're saying and not the opposite but a different approach to like being really grateful and thankful for your, for what you have is the things that like, um, you're upset about or don't have like realizing it's not that big of a deal. Like you're actually more than okay. You're actually well off in comparison to what somebody else might be going through. You want to know something really interesting is, um,

I learned this from, uh, David Deutsch. I follow a lot of his information and sometimes it's hard to sift through because he's just extremely intelligent. I actually was able to get in contact with him and have a little email exchange with him more recently. So I'm hoping to get him on the podcast. But this podcast is extremely unconventional for him since he's more on the educational side of things most of the time. But anyway, this is a really weird thing to think about.

But happiness comes from just one thing. It comes from solving a problem for yourself. And so when you think about like where, where happiness kind of comes from, where it extends from, it's pretty, it's pretty wild on this kind of same topic and not necessarily totally related,

but being prepared for stuff can make you happy. Having like having a skillset and again, the term making you happy. Having like having a skill set. And again, the term making you happy, I realized like, but in this context, I think it's appropriate. Let's say,

you know, let's, let's say, let's say we're at a party, right? And people make a circle, like people are like dancing and just being silly as fuck inside of the circle, right? Well, if you have a skillset where you know how to dance, like you're going to be like, all right, this is my shit. Like I'm going to be

really dope at this. So check out what I can do, you know? So being prepared for stuff, I like Andrew's thought process of thinking the opposite a little bit, because I think the opposite of happiness is to be frustrated. And where does frustration usually come from? It usually comes from the inability to solve a problem. But if we're usually being honest with ourselves, we're just not prepared for stuff sometimes. Like if you're really frustrated and mad that you're late, you could just prepare a little earlier and you could, you know, I'm late often, but it doesn't bother me. So it's kind of just par for the course for me.

But if you have something that is really frustrating to you that you're getting mad or upset about, if you're more prepared for it, most likely it won't bother you. And if you're good at something, a lot of times a lot of happiness can come from that because you are solving problems for yourself. Yeah, I think you had said this in the past. You use this scenario, but if you got to take a hard test and you are completely unprepared and you're just really frustrated that you even got to show up to take this damn test. But if you were ready for it, it's like, fuck yeah, bring it. And you ace it. And you're just like really frustrated that you even got to show up to take this damn test but if you were ready for it it's like fuck yeah bring it and you ace it and you're just like yep that was awesome you feel good about yourself and you're absolutely right that whole problem solving thing that's that's totally true i i love that uh what was uh his name i'm sorry david

doyce name is david doyce yeah that's sick dude that's that's amazing. Yeah, that's sick. That's amazing. But I think that's something that people can take a lot from. Number one, like, okay, I'll talk more about this probably. But with, I guess, what you do on your day-to-day, maybe your work, your job, do you get to do much problem solving there? Is that something that makes you feel good when you're there and you know one thing i'll mention is like it's not that i know some people who they know that their jobs make them money they don't enjoy the jobs but the jobs bring them money that allows them to then go do things that they actually have feel good about that they have a feeling so there's nothing wrong with that because as

we're talking, sometimes we talk about like, you know, uh, building a, uh, not just doing work for the money, but sometimes if it's good money, it will open up things and, uh, and, and, and doors and, and light at lifestyle. Um, that could, that, that works. So you just put some time away on that work and then you go do other things outside of work. That is perfectly okay. I am not dissing that at all. But the problem solving aspect of things is something to think about. If you're someone who maybe you want to find things that fulfill you more and you could figure out maybe a way to make your work and the things you do, problems that you solve. Cause one thing we realized is

like, you know, Mark, the slingshot, the slingshot solved a problem, right? A lot of the products that you put out solve people's problems. Right. Um, and that, that is that that's why it's brought a lot of money. Um, but another thing too, on the, on the side of fitness fitness i guess this is where my bias to jujitsu comes in and this is why when i started it um almost six years ago now why i enjoyed it so much because i was a 260 pound dude that got his ass beat by 150 pound dude and i was like this is a big fucking problem it's a big problem right and it's so enjoyable to continue solving those problems against every different opponent opponent i come across that's one of the reasons why it feels so good to do and i think you hit the nail on the head that's why it's so addictive to some people because every

time you go and train you're continuously hit with new problems of new opponents and you have to try to solve it or if you lose you don't but you got to figure it out yeah i wonder um is it and i guess mark you can help me figure this one out but with problem solving or uh i guess i'll just say like does something that's difficult, something that kind of causes or creates struggle, is that what kind of, I guess, makes us come back for more and kind of keeps us happy? Because in SEMA, what you're saying about the Tesla, when you get that Tesla, like, yeah, dude, we're going to celebrate. That's going to be sick. I can't wait for that day. But it's almost like the journey to get there, all this work that we're putting in right now, that's actually going to be more fun than owning that Tesla a couple of years down the road.

Obviously, that day, it's going to be amazing. Do you guys think if something is a struggle, that actually creates more happiness than being comfortable? It can certainly create more happiness than just being given something. Right. You know, you could still be happy, though, from a gift. I mean, you could still be pretty pumped about the gift and you could be grateful for it. But I agree with what you're saying there is like when you're working on something and working towards something and working for something, the cascade of different things that happen in your body are hard to

measure. You know, I've been trying to figure out ways of defining this for a long time and ways of describing this. But when you get yourself through a set, that's really difficult in the gym and you get yourself past that challenge, I mean, it's, it's a fake thing. Like you made it up for yourself. You're like, this is what I'm going to do. I'm going to do a drop set of squats and I'm going to do, you know, 10 reps with a two 25 and then 10 reps with one 85 and then 10 reps and you hit and you start to get towards 30 reps, you know, you, you feel, I mean, you feel like you're going to die. Like it feels really, really difficult. But when you pushed yourself to get through that, I think, um, you know, our reward systems in our brain and stuff, they, you feel amazing. So I believe that's what makes you, uh, kind of keep coming back for more. You're like, I need this, this,

this serves me really well to, um, to do this. And for some people, they kind of start out with, um, almost the mindset of like, this is punishment. Like I'm going to go punish my, I'm gonna go kick my own ass, uh, Matt Vincent with a hate brand, you know? That's where a lot of things kind of start for some people because there's certain characteristics of themselves that they don't really necessarily love. But usually when someone does it for a long enough time, they kind of recognize what a beautiful thing it is and what a wonderful thing it is to even have the opportunity to go in and play around with fitness, you know, in this country that we live in, where we have so much freedom. But I think there's something

amazing about having pressure and being up against something and just having some doubt, having some self-doubt, like defeating self-doubt is a really, really rewarding thing. And maybe you kind of have a little bit of that no one thinks I can do it kind of mentality, which no one really cares. But sometimes people kind of harbor that and they carry that. But also self-doubt. I think all of us can relate to having a lot of self-doubt maybe you have self-doubt in some of these other areas but when you're in the gym or with like mike tyson who had a lot of self-doubt he said as soon as i stepped in the ring and they have that footage

of like where it's like black and white and he talked about how scared he was before the fight he was like i was terrified i. I would be moved to tears. And he goes, but the second I got through those ropes, I'm the killer then. And it's like, boom, the screen goes into color and you're like, whoa. And it just shows him just rocking people. But I think a lot of great self-discovery happens in that process of going through things that are just a tad bit more difficult than what you have done before. Yeah, no, it's just like, I think it was Huberman that was talking about how like testosterone and, and dare for more plates, more dates. He's talking about like

testosterone increases as you achieve more things, or it like you will have increases when you have wins. Right. So when you're when you're having these small wins over time and it's like a little bit of an increase in difficulty of things that you do, but you're continuously having a win and a win and a win. Like you it's it's it's like it's a reward system. You're going to have more tests. Um, and I think that's just kind of a funny way of thinking about that, but I, I, I think you're totally right. I think it's, it's good for us to figure out, um, what ways, number one, what goals we have, what, like whatever those may be. So like, it's good to set specific goals. They could be big goals. And if they're big goals, there's going to have a level of difficulty. They're going to be hard. And then you're going to set up smaller things to help you get towards that goal. And those

things are not going to be easy. They're going to be somewhat difficult, but there are steps that can be taken. There are things that can be achieved. And each time you achieve said thing, you'll feel better about yourself. You'll feel happy that you achieved that. And it's onto the next one. Just like you were mentioning, Andrew, when I get that Tesla and whatever car you're going to get, that's not the end goal. Like there's, there's something we're trying to do after that too. So it's going to be cool and it'll be another notch. Right. But right after that, it's like, what are we doing next? You know? So it's like, how can, what are you doing to set up constant new goals, constant new achievements? Uh, what is in your life? Even when it comes to

diet, right? We, we all have like issues when it comes to sticking to our diets, but if we can set small things up so that, and, and, and, uh, things like guardrails during our day, so we don't fail every single day is another fricking achievement. And then at some point it just becomes something that's easy for you and habitual for you. And you don't have to think about it. And it's just your mode of the being. Yeah. I love that. You know, kind of really come from a lot of small victories over time. And I think for some folks, it might be a good idea just to set some goals and set some things up that are immediate, that are quick, that actually be really easy.

And you can kind of celebrate those things. I mean, even just like at the gym, when people see me like walking with the sled, I try to like, you know, touch, uh, you know, one wall and I'll put together the wall and things like that. I try to have just these almost like tiny victories, you know, very, very small victories. And those things, um, they, they bring me some happiness. And I think a lot of times we think that we're going to be way happier when we're in a certain place. But usually most of the happiness happens along the way, as you're going. And it's hard sometimes because you feel like you're sacrificing certain things in your life and you don't know why. You're like, why can't I just drink with everybody else? Why can't I just, why can't I just have a fucking piece of bread? You know,

why can't I just eat a fucking sandwich like everybody else? But the reason why you choose not to eat the sandwich is that you probably know that that might cause a cascade of things to happen where you, uh, kind of unfold and you're not loyal to the discipline that you're trying to adhere to. And there's a lot of research shows this, which I think this is really compelling. And I think this is motivating to know that you can hit pleasure sensors by eating like a cheesecake or eating your favorite ice cream or whatever food it is that is your favorite. But what hits those receptors even harder is to do the things that you set out to do in the first place. So that is really, it's an interesting

thing. We know they're different. We know just relaxing and fucking eating that cookie is going to feel way different than you throwing down another steak. But to know that our reward system does reward us for making the correct choice, I think is pretty badass. And you can say, you know what, I'm just going to keep leaning into this harder and harder and harder. And that's how we end up with people like Stan Efferty in our lives. That's how we end up with Michael Hearn and these different people that we've had on the show and talk about and look up to. That's awesome. I want to look into that because I understand it. It makes a lot of sense. If I do want to have a bowl of cereal and that bowl of cereal turns into an entire box

in that moment, it is pretty fun. But then afterwards, I don't know, have like a bowl of cereal and that bowl of cereal turns into an entire box in that moment. It is pretty fun. But then afterwards I feel like crap versus not doing that and feeling pretty good about myself. You're absolutely right. I do 100% feel better. I know that, but yet hearing you say that, I'm like, wait, maybe that's actually true. I know that. But yet hearing you say that, I'm like, wait, maybe that's actually true. I'm not just like lying to myself. That's amazing. For you, Mark, I mean, I want to approach this a different way because we can, I mean, every now and again, we can see the Pacific Ocean behind you. You're in a beautiful house in Bodega. So you have many reasons to be happy, quote, you know, happy. But on the other side of things that we were just explaining about, like struggling and, you know, the journey and stuff. I mean, you, like I said, you have a lot of things to be happy for. So how do you kind of create some of these goals now that you've been able to achieve so much in lifting in business with your family? achieved so much in lifting, in business, with your family. It's almost like, shit,

are you going to run out of things to accomplish? Is that checklist going to run out one day and you're just going to call it quits and be like, all right, guys, good life. See you later. What do you do these days? Yeah, I actually just had a really wonderful conversation with myself the other day about this. And I used to write a lot. I've went through many, many journals over the years and I've gotten out of the habit of writing. I think maybe the pandemic, I would sit down sometimes in a coffee shop and just write. I would sit down sometimes in a coffee shop and just write. I don't really love to write at home that much. So anyway, I got a little out of sorts with that.

But I used to research stuff, think on top of that. I'd occasionally write down a goal. And so it is something I got to get back in touch with. I have a lot of physical goals. Um, there's a lot of things that, uh, um, that keep me really excited and really fired up. Like I'm super excited about, um, being able to run and to, to be able to, uh, you know, improve upon that. I went to, uh, say in strength the other day and got into a conversation with a guy and he, uh, has a wrestling background and now he does jujitsu and, uh, you know, and Seamus told us many times, he shared with us many times, uh, the benefits of jujitsu.

I already know the benefits of jujitsu. I did it years ago. Um, so now it's just like, my goals are like, not to like, when I was young, it was like, let me, let me go into these things and let me like conquer them or let me be like a badass at these things. Now it's more like, I just want exposure to things. I just want to do stuff. And so jujitsu, there's, there's a, the, the gym in, in Dixon, which isn't too far from me. That would be a goal for me to go in there and learn some jiu-jitsu, but also maybe just learn some MMA-type stuff. I think although learning all that different stuff at one time

would be a real kick in the balls. I like the challenge that it presents, but I also can envision that, you know, from jujitsu, maybe I get pretty sore from certain things and maybe I could say, let me work on some stand-ups. Setting goals is always important and I'm glad that Nseema brought it up because uh you know having those things to kind of reach for and uh and to go for are things that keep you really motivated there are things that um the you know the people in the world that are

the highest performers like they're they don't they don't ever run out of goals they just make new goals you know the rock still know, The Rock still has goals. John Cena still has goals. Like all these guys, they still have goals. And so staying in touch with those, I think, is really critical and really important to even keep you excited every single day. You know, I'm really – it's dope that you mentioned the jiu-jitsu thing because Ben Alderman, he owns a CrossFit gym here in Sacramento. Super dope dude. And, you know, I wanted to learn some Olympic lifting, not so I could compete in Olympic lifting, just because it's a skill set that I do not have that I want to learn to do just to be able to do it. Like, I just want to be able to

snatch some weight comfortably. Um, and it's something I don't know how to do. My body doesn't know how to do it. Uh, and like seeking that goal, right already it's exciting, right? And it's not like I want to be a world beater or anything, but I think what you said is super important there. Like if you want to, if you're interested in something, don't think that you have to compete in it has to be your thing, whatever. Um, but just going towards that, you'll, you'll come to find that you, you'll feel very accomplished. It'll bring you a somewhat of a sense of like fulfillment in terms of what you're doing, because it's, it's new, it's challenging, it's a problem that you get to solve. I think that I really like what you said before too about leaning into what's difficult because I had a friend in the past, right? And when they told me this, I was like, huh, okay, that makes

sense. But that's problematic for you. They were continuing to make a lot of bad decisions that they were unhappy about. And then I asked them, okay, why do you keep doing that? When you know, it's continuing to bring the same negative outcomes. You see it over and over, you know, what's going to happen. So why do you continue? And they legitimately said, I do it because it's easy. Literally, those are the words that came out of their mouth. I do it because it's easy. It's easy yielding a negative result, but it's easy. Right? So what you said, Mark, about leaning into difficulty, that's important. important. Leaning into something that's somewhat difficult that you know, you're not sure if you're going to be able to do it. But when you do lean into difficulty, it usually brings out good outcomes because it usually is leading towards whatever goals you might have. So we have to get into the habit of trying to stay away from what is easy and leaning into what is slightly difficult. And it's okay if that thing that you're leaning into that's difficult doesn't make you

happy. It could turn out that it makes you feel kind of miserable for a while. But it's also part of a longer term goal. It's also a part of having a vision right on a goal. It gives you a horizon. It gives you something to look towards, gives you something to look forward to. And it's going to cause a bunch of other disciplines to fall in place and to fall in line. And when you show yourself, like maybe it's hard for me to read, you know, maybe it's maybe I have shitty handwriting. You know, maybe there's a lot of skills. Maybe there's a lot of things that maybe the person next to me can do better than me. Right. But I know what I can do and I know what I can accomplish. At least I can pick that thing up over there and move it. You know, at least I can, you know, do these certain things. And when you do these things and you accomplish these things for yourself, it's not necessarily a way to like,

just always feel amazing about yourself, but you could at the very least just not feel like shit about yourself. You know, I kind of have two different mindsets that kind of run in my head, like two different programs that run in my head. You know, one is a little bit more of a competitive side. One is like, hey, let's try to be better than everybody, you know, which is just an unrealistic, weird side of me. Right. And then the other side of me is like, just don't fail yourself today. Just just keep like, keep it fucking really simple. Like, don't, don't just, you don't have to be great. You don't have to do anything extraordinary.

You don't have to do anything special. You don't have to necessarily be super happy every day. You don't have to make other people happy. You don't have to make other people laugh. You don't have to give people the most insightful information that they've ever heard ever. Just don't fuck up. Don't fail yourself today. So that kind of conversation, that kind of just talk in my head has been super beneficial and super helpful to me to keep me on track with stuff. me to keep me on track with stuff. I love that. Thank you for sharing that Mark. Holy shit. That's a damn, that's another one. That's like, I'm going to win. I'm going to win today.

Sometimes it's hard. Sometimes you're like, fuck man. Like you're going to win every day. 365. Like, man, that's, but just don't fuck up. Don't fail yourself. Sounds a little easier, right? You don't know me, bro. I go hard in paint. But, uh, uh, should be, there's so much, so much stuff to unpack with all with what both of you guys said, but like what in SEMA, um, something that makes somebody, uh, you know, comfortable, uh, it was easy or it's all I know, you know, those are kind of like, like three death traps, I think for anybody to kind of stop doing something. But in regards to like setting these,

these, these smaller goals and, and still challenging ourselves, how do we know how hard or how far out to reach for a certain goal? Cause you don't want to be a little bitch. You don't want to be like, Hey, as long as I have two cups of water today, then today's a win. And then the rest of the day, I'm going to have all the cookies I want. Um, but you also don't want to say like, I'm just going to eat egg whites and, uh, that's it. You know, cause that's it, you know, because that's going to be a pretty, pretty gassy, shitty day. So I guess how can people properly manage how difficult these goals should be or how far away they should try to reach for?

So I would say that, you know, I don't think that there's a problem setting some highly massive goal. Right. But the problem is that if you set a goal, right, your brain is really good at knowing who you are. Let's just put it that way. You know your habits, you know where you're at. So if you say, I want to make $10 million this year and you've only been making 50 K, it sounds like a great goal. And you might be pumped for the first eight hours of the first day that you set that goal. But then your brain's like, bro, you want to make 10 and mil this year, but you have no infrastructure for that shit. So like, now, now let's, let's say this and let's say there's, for some reason you have the odd $10 million arbitrary goal, whatever, whatever that significance is to you. But then you set that goal to be something that's way down the road. Like, okay, that's just, that's something that's years down, maybe 10 years down. But then you work backwards from it, right?

And instead of saying 10 million, let's just say I want to lose 100 pounds, because I think we can all wrap our head around that. It seems like a big goal, right? But when you look backwards from 100 pounds, you say, well, if I want to lose 100 pounds, well, today, what are the things that are stopping me from that? I snack a lot. I eat a lot of sugary drinks. I'm eating all day long. I eat a lot of processed foods. Okay, so I'll take this step to get this stuff out. And then maybe I'll take this step to learn what's in the food I'm eating. And maybe I'll take this step because I know that when I have, like you can literally, it takes time and maybe it'll

take help with you and somebody else, but you can outline how you're going to lose that a hundred pounds. And it might be a year from now, it might be a year and a half from now, but if you can make an outline, then your mind can look at these small things and be like, oh yeah, I can do that. I can do that. I can do that. I can do that. I can do that. And before you know it, you've lost a hundred pounds, but you have to set out the outline. You can't just hope to lose it, right? Say you want to do it and not set up any type of infrastructure to head towards that set goal. So you gotta, you gotta line things out, or at least that's how I personally like setting up certain goals, setting up smaller goals that I can hit that are going to lead to that goal makes it easier. Setting up smaller goals that I can hit that are going to lead to that goal makes it easier.

Agreed 100%. There's really nothing much more to add to that. I think that was really well said. Just having those smaller things that you do accomplish, you prove yourself to yourself. And when you do that, it gives you a lot of confidence. And you're like, maybe I could push a little further. Maybe I could be even better than what I just accomplished. So I think that's well said. Andrew, take us on out of here, buddy. I will. That was an amazing episode. If you guys appreciate this one,

please make sure you slap that like button and subscribe right here on YouTube. If you are not already subscribed and hit that ring or hit that ring, ring that bell notification because sometimes we go live, sometimes we premiere things, sometimes we just upload things. But either way, make sure you guys hit that notification button so that way you don't miss any of it. Please follow the podcast at Mark Bell's Power Project on Instagram, at MB Power Project on TikTok and Twitter. Huge shout out and thank you to Eat Right Foods for sponsoring today's episode. Links to them down in the description below

as well as the podcast show notes. My Instagram and Twitter is at IamAndrewZ. And Seema, where can people find you? At AnsemaYinYang on Instagram and YouTube. At AnsemaYinYang on TikTok and Twitter. If you guys liked the conversation, comment down below and let us know. And by the way, both Mark and Andrew, you guys are wearing some sick down below let us know and by the way both mark and andrew

you guys are wearing some sick shirts that i don't have what's going on here sucks to be you bro you have a uh you have a competition coming up pretty soon oh okay it's kind of pissing me off um so yeah i pan has is coming up in September. I'm on the waiting list. I thought I already paid and signed up for this tournament, but it was a tournament that I paid and signed up for that I got hurt and I couldn't go to. I got those mixed up.

So I'm hopefully going to be off of the waiting list and able to go to Pan Ams. If I can, then if I'm off the waiting list, I will. If not, then I'm just going to do Worlds, or I'll do another tournament, then I'll do Worlds. But it is what it is. When you think you did something, always double check. Damn.

If you put it in the calendar, you probably would have remembered. But that's just me, my thought. Dude, why do you have to come at him like that? Because he's an Aries. Yeah, it's because I'm an Aries. I don't even know what that means,

but yeah. This is not good for Andrew to continue to build up his confidence. It's going to be bad for both of us. We can't have three of us on here

that are all the same. I just want to kind of leave you guys with this. You know, you'll be as happy as you make your mind to be. That's something that I've shared many times said by Benjamin Franklin. And I think it's a great quote. Like you're not going to necessarily be happier

when you get to this or when you get to that or when you go on that vacation or when that holiday comes, you're as happy as you make up your mind to be. You got the freedom to select, you know, select the emotion that you want to attach to whatever going on in life. It's up to you. I know sometimes it's more difficult than others, but I'm at Mark Mellie Bell.

Strength is never a weakness. Weakness is never strength. Catch you guys later. Bye.