Mark Bell's Power Project - How to Improve Your Style to Increase Your Attractiveness - Tanner Guzy || MBPP Ep. 944

Episode Date: June 12, 2023

Dress better with Vuori and automatically receive 20% off: https://vuoriclothing.com/powerproject In Episode 944, Tanner Guzy, Mark Bell, Nsima Inyang, and Andrew Zaragoza talk about how we can easily upgrade our wardrobe and how men can start dressing like MEN. Follow Tanner on IG: https://www.instagram.com/tannerguzy/ Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/tannerguzy Tanner's Book: https://amzn.to/2HteNjH Tanner's Main Site: masculine-style.com   Sponsors mentioned on air: ➢ https://vuoriclothing.com/powerproject to automatically save 20% off your first order at Vuori! ➢ https://www.vivobarefoot.com/us/powerproject to save 15% off Vivo Barefoot shoes! ➢ https://hostagetape.com/powerproject Free shipping and free bedside tin!   New Power Project Website: https://powerproject.live Join The Power Project Discord: https://discord.gg/yYzthQX5qN Subscribe to the new Power Project Clips Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UC5Df31rlDXm0EJAcKsq1SUw   Special perks for our listeners below! ➢ https://withinyoubrand.com/ Code POWERPROJECT to save 15% off supplements!   ➢ https://markbellslingshot.com/ Code POWERPROJECT to save 15% off all gear and apparel!   ➢ https://mindbullet.com/ Code POWERPROJECT to save 15% off Mind Bullet!   ➢ https://goodlifeproteins.com/ Code POWERPROJECT to save up to 25% off your Build a Box   ➢ Better Fed Beef: https://betterfedbeef.com/pages/powerproject   ➢ https://thecoldplunge.com/ Code POWERPROJECT to save $150!!   ➢ Enlarging Pumps (This really works): https://bit.ly/powerproject1 Pumps explained: https://youtu.be/qPG9JXjlhpM   ➢ https://www.eightsleep.com/powerproject to automatically save $150 off the Pod Pro at 8 Sleep!   ➢ https://marekhealth.com Use code POWERPROJECT10 for 10% off ALL LABS at Marek Health! Also check out the Power Project Panel: https://marekhealth.com/powerproject Use code POWERPROJECT for $101 off!   ➢ Piedmontese Beef: https://www.piedmontese.com/ Use Code POWER at checkout for 25% off your order plus FREE 2-Day Shipping on orders of $150   Follow Mark Bell's Power Project Podcast ➢ https://www.PowerProject.live ➢ https://lnk.to/PowerProjectPodcast ➢ Insta: https://www.instagram.com/markbellspowerproject ➢ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/markbellspowerproject   FOLLOW Mark Bell ➢ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marksmellybell ➢https://www.tiktok.com/@marksmellybell ➢ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkBellSuperTraining ➢ Twitter: https://twitter.com/marksmellybell   Follow Nsima Inyang ➢ https://www.breakthebar.com/learn-more ➢YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/NsimaInyang ➢Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nsimainyang/?hl=en ➢TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@nsimayinyang?lang=en   Follow Andrew Zaragoza on all platforms ➢ https://direct.me/iamandrewz   #PowerProject #Podcast #MarkBell #FitnessPodcast #markbellspowerproject

What does it kind of say about us, you know, our clothes? Most animals will use their visual presence to communicate either I'm dangerous or it's time to have sex. We've taken those two very basic things and turned them into an entire language. And we do it through our grooming, through our clothing, through the way that we wear our clothes. What do you think about these pump covers people are wearing these days? If everybody in the tribe is wearing the pump covers and going super baggy and you show up dressed in a different way, you're immediately signaling that you're an outlier. That's one of the big mistakes that a lot of guys make

when they start thinking about dressing better. Clothing comes first, but mindset is really the biggest thing. McGregor's a really good example of this, is the status has to be there too. If he came onto the scene and he was losing every single fight and he was dressing like that kind of an outlier, it would be a joke. The reason that things suck so much now

is because we've compromised quality, breathability, flow, movement for profit. This is one of the things that I love about you guys is that there's just no one-dimensionality in anything. Yeah, we're always doing it. It's so cool. Multiple shit going on. Right.

I have a pocket pussy right here. So you might see me smile. Don't want that level of multidimensionality. Like, man, Mark is so happy during those shows. Oh, man. I thought I was making a really good point. No. Yeah, yeah.

And then it just went south. That's why nobody listens to this show. It's all my fault. Oh, yeah. And then it just went south. That's why nobody listens to this show. It's all my fault. Oh, man. We got a couple of listeners when Nsema came back on here, but that was it. That's actually a great idea, though. It's not a bad idea. It's not a bad idea.

I do have a zipper on my shorts, so maybe. You never know. Dude, you guys' podcasting frequency went through the roof all of a sudden you're enjoying this a lot more than you see yeah record more but speak so much less it's been great oh lord so you were just talking a little bit about like kind of incorporating exercise into your day-to-day do you have uh you told me earlier that you got five kids? Six. Six, right? How old are you? I'm 39. That is a

world record, right? Can you check? Andrew, can you look that up? Six kids. Six kids. All of my oldest is about to turn 11, so they are packed tight. Wow. I watched Nseema's soul just leave his body. What's the youngest? Like three? Six months.

Oh, six months. So you got one in each category. Basically. Okay, so we did the math on this. That's a lot of kids. My wife has been pregnant during every calendar year since 2011. Wow. Holy crap.

Yeah, it's wild. What a woman. Seriously. Right? She's a rock star. Yeah. Are you guys going for another one? No, we're done. What a woman. Seriously. Right? She's a rock star. Yeah. Are you guys going for another one? No, we're done.

We're done. My son is pissed about it because it's him and five girls. Whoa! Right? Totally outnumbered. Whoa. Yeah. And so he keeps up and he's like, can you guys please have another one?

And we're done. Can we at least get a male puppy or something? Something. Yeah. But the nice thing is he gets a very different relationship with dad than the girls do. He gets special treatment. He does. He absolutely does. So how do you incorporate in fitness with that many kids

with work and everything? Do you have opportunity to get out and train enough? Yeah, the big thing is I make it more of a priority where my mornings are just kind of set aside for anything related to fitness. get out and train enough or yeah the big thing is um i make it more of a priority where uh my mornings are just kind of like set aside for anything related to fitness and i actually i was talking to my dad and my one of my brothers about this this weekend where i really kind of struggle because there's so many things that i've fallen in love with doing that i can't do them all like we were talking before i'm doing a spartan beast in a month and I haven't done really much running because I can't

talk myself out of going to Jiu Jitsu or Muay Thai and instead to go running. It's too fun. Exactly right? You're like running versus Muay Thai or Jiu Jitsu But I've done running like I just did Ragnar with somebody's last weekend. What's Ragnar? It's a relay race

and so this the one that we did was one of the trail ones. Like Ragnarok? Kind of. Right? I mean, they designed it to feel like that. My wife's watching that every time it's on. Thor Ragnarok. Every time it's on.

Just without fail. She's like, it's funny. I'm like, I don't know if you're watching it because it's funny. Yeah. There may be some other reasons, right? Exactly. Yeah. But yeah, so it's a relay race.

And the one that we did was a trail one. So you have a base camp. Yeah. But yeah, so it's a relay race. And the one that we did was a trail one. So you have a base camp. And then you have a four-mile loop, an eight-mile loop, and a four-mile loop that you have to do over a 24-hour period. And so it's just – you're looking at me like – it is. It's a certain level of craziness, right?

Because it's fun. Okay. I mean it's level two fun where it's not necessarily fun when you're in the moment of it. But you're thinking about the stories after like you're at camp waiting for it to be your turn to run and you're hanging out with the boys and all of that. And in that regard, it's pretty fun. Did we just learn something new? Level two fun?

I've heard this. Okay, so there's three types of fun. Level one is where you're actually having fun in the moment of it. Level two is where it sucks in the moment but you have fond memories thinking about it. And level three is where it just sucks all together, but the stories are good enough that you're having fun when you tell the stories about it. Oh. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah, level three is a tough one. Right? Yeah. But that happens when you just go out and do something kind of crazy. Exactly. And it's miserable the whole time. And you don't even have good memories, but good stories.

Give me a level three fun thing for you. Oh, that's a good question. I'm trying to think. I'm like, have I had level three fun? I would say, so I've had one boxing bout, and that was probably level three fun. You woke up in the hospital? No, I mean, I got the crap kicked out of me. Thankfully, it wasn't that bad, but I got wrecked.

Okay. And when I think back on it,'s still a little of like those anxious feelings of like oh my gosh i can't believe i did that i can't believe i'm gonna do that again but the stories are always fun to tell okay so i would say that's probably the most poignant level three fun for me you had a level three with uh ryan soper and graham tuttle we went to tahoe and we went to uh we went on a hike and there was more snow on the ground than we thought there would be because we're in like the mountains

and we got off trail and we're like, I think we go back this way. I think we go back that way and we just got lost. How many hours? Eight, nine hours. In the snow.

That's lost, lost. In the snow. And Graham had toe shoes, like those Biberm toe shoes. He had those on. That's miserable but it was the best food we've ever eaten in our lives we came back yes we had like earned it hamburgers and hot dogs and it was like the greatest thing of all time there we go but yeah

we didn't even mean to have that kind of fun no we meant we meant to get into level two yes we ended up in zone three there oh dear uh do you have uh like some weights at your house or something like that? Yes. We have a garage gym. It's now been moved down in the basement. And that's been one of the things that's been really good. One, from a social dynamic of I have a consistent group of buddies that would come over and we'd lift three or four times a week. But then also the kids.

I grew up – my parents are active runners. Like that was how they dated is they would go run. And I remember about a decade ago my dad ran every marathon in the state of Utah as one of his goals. And the only downside to it, they have five. Okay. Yeah. The only downside to it was that maybe they were doing more than just run. There's a little bit more than that. A little bit more, a little bit more, right? Yeah. But the only downside was that was exercise was something that they went and did. Like we would see them leave and we would see them come back and smell dad when he came back, right? And like that was it.

And so it didn't take to the same extent that it could have. And so my wife and I very consciously thought like how can we make exercise is something that the kids see us do that they can come participate with us in and that level. And so the garage gym has been really good for us in that regard. Yeah. And they see the friends coming over and they see all different kinds of people. Right. Uh, and not only exercising, but enjoying it. Exactly. Yeah. Like we, every, every November we do, um, for our church group, for our men, we do a deadlifts and donuts competition, where we just invite all the men over in the neighborhood.

And it's either training guys who are brand new or it's setting PRs for guys who have done it before. And the kids come out and watch. And the other dads will bring their kids and try to make it into something that isn't just scary and done out there. But there's the social aspect of it and the family aspect of it as well. Yeah. So your kids have never – it's never been a hurdle for you or even I'm curious your wife too to stay in shape with that many kids

over the years yeah I would say my wife is a really good example of this where my son Locke the day that he was born she was squatting that morning like just very consistent about exercising and movement and all of that and yeah you know they I think to some extent we may have taken it too far where they see us get kind of like neurotic about our food intake or weighing things or calorie counting or trying to zap or anything else. And so we're trying to back off on a little bit of it from the diet perspective. But from an exercise perspective, it really is just we try to be an active family. Sometimes we'll go take bike rides or we'll go do walks. My son's training Muay Thai and jiu-jitsu.

I've got other daughters that are in tumbling or doing soccer. And we just try to keep movement as part of our family culture. Yeah. That is a tough thing when it comes to the food side of things because food and entertainment, they sort of go hand in hand. And I think where we get out of control and where we get out of hand is when we have food, entertainment, but then we're also not moving. Right. Because sometimes all those things sometimes go together if you're on a vacation or something like that. Even when I'm thinking about different places I'm going to go and visit, I'm like, well, when I go and visit there, I still want to have my diet intact.

So I'm trying to think of what I'm going to do to counteract maybe the food I'm going to enjoy. And to counteract it, I might walk. I might utilize some intermittent fasting. Like I don't think there's any reason why I still can't apply some rules without bringing a scale with you and like typing everything into your app and being like, I got 45 grams of fat left, that kind of thing. I think you can do it, but it is, it can be difficult. Well, and I think a big part of it for us is also that it takes, if we get too crazy about it, it takes a lot of the social, emotional, I would argue even some of the spiritual aspects

of food away and just turns it into like macros and calories and it makes it lifeless and just pure fuel. And food obviously is that. But there's all these other elements that go into it too that need to be embraced just as much as the macronutrients or the fuel nutrients. Or is this good for what my body needs from a training perspective? Is this good for what my spirit needs or my emotions need or what my relationships need? There's that aspect of it as well that you can't track that in an app. How about the – you mentioned jujitsu a little bit ago what got you into that we were talking about that before the show but how's your experience been so far so i'm i'm new to this i'm like six months in and i so i boxed for a few years and a few months ago uh i decided that i

wanted my son to be able to get in and understand some of these combat sports. He's a really sensitive kid. And I love that about him. And I don't want to squash that in him. Actually. And in the six, where's he line up? He's number two. He's number two. Yeah. Nine years old. And so, but I want some balance there because I don't want him to be so sensitive and so tender that it becomes something that gets exploited or it becomes a weakness for him. And so I wanted some balance there. And so we found a gym, Wasatch Combat Sports, that's just up the street from us. And I started taking him to the kids' classes. And within like two weeks of sitting in the kids' classes and watching him and doing the math of

like, okay, in seven years, he's going to be as big as I am. He's going to have seven years of experience that I don't have. I have to start training jujitsu now. And so there was that, there was that incentive that kicked in real quick. And what I loved is that I just, it feels like play. And it, I mean, it doesn't when you're getting your face smashed the first month or two,

but when you get a camaraderie with the people that are in there and you're rolling with the same guys over and over again, because like I've, I've been strength training for 10 years. I know I don't look like it, especially compared to you guys, but I love strength training and it still feels like it's work and a grind. And there's a lot of benefit and satisfaction to that for me, but it wasn't play and jujitsu and Muay Thai have become play. And I love tapping into that part of my brain and connecting that with my body where play can be something that my body does. And trying to help my son realize that as well where it's like, yes, we want to get better. We want to compete. But like, let's have some fun and treat this like play as well. sometimes you go to do something and you're like,

I didn't know I could do that. Or I didn't know I could still do that. Or wow, that was, wow, kind of surprised myself. And you get excited about it. Yeah, yeah, I totally agree. Where there's just the, I remember the first time sparring and boxing a few years ago and you really get like a solid cross to the face. And you're like, man, that hurts.

But that's not nearly as bad as I was afraid it was going to be. Let's keep going. Let's do more. And there's that self-realization when you try new things where it's just like, okay, I'm way more capable than I thought I was. Yeah. What do you got to say on that, Andrew? I'm sure you got some things going on. Yeah, no, absolutely.

I think I was talking to Graham about it because we both – well, he started before me, but we're still all kind of at the same, I guess, level now. And it's like, did you have that like, oh, I don't have a broken jaw moment or I mean a glass jaw moment. And I definitely did. I mean, it was really just like after the first day and now granted my feet got destroyed because I got really bad mat burn, but it was like a really cool feeling because, you know, I've always avoided confrontation. And so for me going into a place where we're going to, you know, test each other, it was very uncomfortable. But after the first time I was like, whoa, like I'm in a position where another grown man like can't get out of, or like I have control over another man trying to like stop me and he can't right now. Like this is, this is

crazy. Like I've never felt that before. And as, I guess, lame as it sounds to be like, oh, it was empowering, but it was. It's crazy. You can kill somebody. I mean. If there's not a ref there, there's not someone to stop it.

I know you're training, but you could literally take someone out. Wow. That capacity's there now. I don't know if I can kill somebody, guys. Well, physically. I'm just joking but yeah no so there was that and the whole do it andrew the whole camaraderie thing of course you

know it's been fantastic like later today i'm actually going to work some drills with a buddy of mine you know for you know because he's a brown belt and so i have a lot to learn he's going to come over and he's going to help me out and so like that wouldn't have never happened before jiu-jitsu where i don't know know if it was, I guess maybe with lifting, like I lift with Mark and in SEMA, that would definitely help. But to be like, hey, guys, you want to come over to my garage gym and we'll go train deadlifts or something, whatever it may be, it's like, ah, we'll wait until tomorrow or something.

You know what I mean? It wouldn't necessarily happen. But that whole camaraderie with jiu-jitsu is like, it's like nothing else. It's incredible. They're welcome to sit down if they want to sit down over here. Tanner has a live studio audience. Nice. I brought my two oldest with me.

Not all of his kids, but he brought a couple of them. The self-sufficient ones. Yeah. We were talking earlier, too, about the att know, the attire, you know, clothes. And you're the man with a lot of this stuff. What does it kind of say about us, you know, our clothes? Do you think it kind of sends a message or is it sometimes just maybe you just picked up what was on your floor and just chucked it on? Or is there more to it than that?

There's always more to it than that. Is there more to it than that? There's always more to it than that. Because even the fact that something ended up being on your floor and it made it through that level of culling to get to the point where it's on your floor, there's some level of intentionality, whether that's on your part or a spouse or a parent or somebody else. I think the best way to think about it is clothing. And if you learn to be intentional with your clothing, it's like learning how to read or write. Like there's this visual literacy, um, where you can communicate almost anything that you want to people. If you learn how to dress in a way that you understand what you're communicating and they understand what you're communicating. And even on like a super basic fundamental level, we're not unique to this within the animal kingdom. You know, most animals will use their visual presence to communicate either I'm

dangerous or it's time to have sex. Right. And like, because humans are so much smarter than animals, we've taken those two very basic things and turn them into an entire language. And we do it through our grooming, through our clothing, through the way that we wear our clothes, what it is that we have on, like there's a whole language that you can learn to speak by just caring about how you present yourself. Yeah. What do you think about these pump covers people are wearing these days? These really like baggy, you know, like bodybuilders. I mean, I guess bodybuilders have been doing it for a while, right?

They've been putting on really baggy pants and tops. Baggy clothes kind of like in their quote-unquote off-season for a long time. Yeah, I think it's really interesting because part of it, you know, it being in the off season is that there's not the same level of confidence when you're on a bulk, especially depending on how dirty the bulk is compared to how you feel when you're cut. Right. And then a big part of it, too, is even there's the cultural aspect of it where if everybody in the tribe is wearing the pump covers and going super baggy and you show up dressed in a different way, you're immediately signaling that you're an outlier. And are you comfortable with that? Some guys are very comfortable with that. They'll roll with it, embrace it.

Other guys, no way, and they're going to just fit right in. And so there's the self-perception, but also this communication aspect of it too. I just remember the first time I came to super training in the old gym back in 2015. You know where I'm going. I know, exactly. So, I mean, I was a bodybuilder, right?

And when I trained, like I'd wear leggings, like just like spandex because they're comfortable. My thighs are big. So like normal shorts. We were like, no. This is offensive. I came to super training and all these guys were wearing shorts past their knees, baggy fucking shorts and shit. I'm doing my deadlifts or whatever. And this one guy's like, I don't know if you can.

I don't think you can wear that. I was like, what do you mean I can't wear it? He's like, that's, you can't wear that. I was like, why? He's like, it's just not allowed. And then I was like, you know what? I'm new. I won't ask any questions.

So it was just hilarious. Send the wrong signals here. Immediately, I was not part of the tribe. Right? Yeah. And you feel it. What do you think is going on sometimes when, you know, Encima looks amazing, but if he got done with a workout and he went to like a grocery store, maybe you'd put on a t-shirt because you like are, you know, we work so hard for this body. And it's great to get like a compliment.

this body and it's great to get like a compliment. But sometimes in certain scenarios, certain situations, maybe at the grocery store or cruising through Target or Walmart or something like that, you might feel a little awkward because again, you don't look like everybody else that's there. And you're, you know, maybe you came in with a pump and so you might cover up. Right. Yeah. And I think that that's, again, kind of indicative of this idea of, I think it's a good thing that there's a level of social awareness. that's, again, kind of indicative of this idea of I think it's a good thing. There's a level of social awareness. You know, it's kind of like you use a different tone of voice when you're at a football game than you do when you're in the library. Right. And it doesn't mean that you're a different person in those environments.

You're just socially aware enough of what the expectations are. And so when you're in the gym and especially like a powerlifting gym is different than a CrossFit gym is different than a bodybuilding gym. And so the environment's going to be different. The clothing is going to be different. And then you go back into like normie world and there's different expectations. And again, it depends on how much of an outlier do you want to be. And even on a given day, you may be comfortable being an outlier, but it may be a day where you're just like, I don't want to deal with any of the attention. And so you can use your clothing to help you feel more comfortable, more confident in that environment. If you don't want to deal with the of the attention. And so you can use your clothing to help you feel more comfortable,

more confident in that environment. Because if you don't want to deal with the attention, don't deal with the attention. Use your clothing as a tool to help you just feel more under the radar and able to just kind of go and exist and not always be like, whoa, what is that guy? He's huge or anything that way. You think a lot of it has to do with just in terms of like people dressing up

and maybe just allowing themselves to be a little bit better on a given day is maybe more in the mindset than it is just in the clothes. Because if the mindset is kind of set correctly, then you most likely will pick out appropriate clothes that will kind of match that mindset. Yeah, you have to start with the mindset. That's one of the big mistakes that a lot of guys make when they start thinking about dressing better is it's this idea of clothing comes first, but mindset is really the biggest thing. Whether it's what do I want to communicate to other people today? What do I want to communicate to myself today? What does that even look like given on clothing? And once you can figure out all of those things, then it becomes a lot easier to actually execute. So it's almost like you could say that mindset is strategy and then the actual clothing is tactics. And your tactics become irrelevant if you're not actually applying them to the correct strategy. And so, yeah, you got to think about a lot of times people think that most of clothing has to do with like the signals you're sending to other people.

And that matters. But that's maybe like 10, 20% of it. The vast majority of it is what am I reinforcing back in my own self-perception? What's the story that I'm telling to myself when I see myself in the mirror or on a Zoom call or on a social media post? Do I look like somebody who's trying to hide, who's desperate to stand out, who's comfortable somewhere in the middle? What is it that I'm reinforcing as far as my own self-perception?

I mean, it's the same thing that we do with our bodies like we love getting positive attention and the way that people respond but you wouldn't be spending all the time in the gym that you do if you didn't feel more like yourself trying to cultivate your body into the into the way that it looks in the way that it feels right you're doing it entirely for other people you wouldn't put this kind of effort and energy into it same thing goes with with your clothes. That'd be so tired. So like Conor McGregor, like his mindset came first, the clothes came second. Yes. And the other aspect, McGregor's a really good example of this, is the status has to

be there too. Because if he came onto the scene and he was losing every single fight and he was dressing like that kind of an outlier, it would be a joke. But because he was as good as he was, he was winning as many fights as consistently as he was. He had that of an outlier it would be a joke but because he was as good as he was he was winning as many fights as consistently as he was he had this walk and exactly and it was all congruent like it all actually aligned together and the mcgregor persona would have been very different if he were still wearing tap out t-shirts and affliction bedazzled jeans like most of them like most of the tribe was before he came into it, right? And so it's different.

Yeah. I got Andrew. I got him. Well, because I could see that person. Right? You know, one thing that you do hear from a lot of guys is like, you know, caring about the way I dress or style or whatever. I just want to be comfortable.

That's more of a female thing. I'm not going to worry about that. Why is that such a, like, why do you see so many men talk like that when it comes to the way they dress? I think it's kind of a cultural anomaly of where we are, where, I mean, if you zoom out and you go back to any other time in history or any other part of the world, men have always cared about their clothing. And ironically, it is the most masculine, like the warrior class that cares the most about their clothes. You have to be able to earn the right to dress like the warriors do.

And if you think about it on its most primitive levels, I've used this example before, but if I were to show up here today with a necklace of like human ears on it, right, reaction, that automatically communicates something. And you can tap into that on a very primal level. And so I think one of the reasons why we're experiencing this today is that it's not actually true ambivalence about appearance. Because if you really didn't care, you would wear a trash bag or your wife's dress or a pink gorilla suit or whatever else. It's that we've been pigeonholed into thinking the only way that's appropriately masculine to care about your clothing is to dress like you don't care about your clothing. And that's why guys will really

hold on to that. And even this idea of like, I want to be comfortable, the way that we trick ourselves is we think that I want to be physically comfortable, but you wear however, whatever level of formality you want to, your clothing can be comfortable if it's made well. What most guys really are saying, and they don't even recognize they're saying is i want to be psychologically comfortable i want to feel like i'm presenting an accurate version of myself and sadly for a lot of guys it also means that i want to blend in to the point where nobody will see me or notice me because then nobody will have any expectations of me and i don't have to live up to whatever that pressure is yeah i'm getting. I'm getting you thinking.

Yeah, man. Like that's, yeah, that's dark. Right? It makes sense. Well, there's a lot of guys that you sometimes just look at and you're like, I think with just a little bit they could. And I'm sure women look at women. But I see a lot of guys where I'm like, if he just made a little bit extra effort, he would be in a better spot. Right.

Like not much, and we're not even talking about like finances necessarily, just some small changes. And it doesn't have to be more formal. I think that's another problem is a lot of guys think, and it's this old kind of like 20th century paradigm because in the West in the 20th century, if you wanted to dress better meant more formal. It was suits and all this type of stuff. And we don't exist in that world anymore. I hate suits. Right? And you don't. Okay. I want to dive into into that in a second but you don't have to wear them okay why why do you hate them well i've i have suits and i like i've worn suits but i just don't like the fact that i cannot move in suits i don't feel free in a suit that's that's the main reason why i hate it i think they look great but walking around in a suit i just do not like the

way it what about if your lady was like i'm happy she doesn't but walking around in a suit, I just do not like the way it feels. What about if your lady was like – I'm happy she doesn't give a fuck about a suit either. What if it just does it for her? What if she's like, yo, even just a couple times a year, you throw that suit on for me. I'll have other things that do it better for you. If I have to throw on the fucking suit, I'll throw on the suit. But that's why I'm happy she doesn't give a fuck about suits. Is your suit tailored by any chance?

Yeah. Okay. I'm just curious because I figured that might be a big part of it. That's where I was going to go. One of the reasons why I hated suits when I was younger is because I have a big ass. I have really big legs. Pants never used to fit me right because my legs were just massive. Yeah.

We can find better fitting stuff. You can find, especially if you get stuff. And I mean, think about it. You go back and you watch, you look at photos, you see videos like you can do suits with range of motion go watch somebody who does ballroom dance oh yeah and tell me that they can't do range of motion but it's because the suits are made the right way and especially because like right now if you're buying off the rack stuff what they have to do is they have to design it in a way that it doesn't look terrible on everybody but that also means it doesn't look great on anybody.

Right. And even so, okay. I'll give you a really like nerdy specific example, but you take like the armhole on, on your suit. Okay. Okay. You think about the way, especially the way that you guys are built, like armholes should be circular because your biceps and your triceps are bigger than where the sleeve is actually inserted. But because they're making a size that's just kind of like, we're just going to make it work for anybody with most off the rack suits. They do this like ovular arm hole to accommodate, but then you get this weird like webbing thing. And the shoulder will stick up weird.

Right. You raise your arm and the whole jacket moves up with you and it detaches from like the neck and everything. And so it looks ridiculous. It doesn't move. It's not comfortable. And you're stuck with this stupid range of motion. Whereas if you get something that's high quality and it's made that way they can make the armhole

the way that it actually fits and you can move and you can do all of this that you're supposed to right and so even that limitation but i would argue even part of it has to do with you're still holding on to that emotional assignment that you gave to suiting when you were little and that's still there and so there's this element of feeling trapped and constricted not just from a physical range of motion but from this perspective of i feel like i'm a trapped little kid that's wearing clothes that make him look like an idiot again there's also the fact that like for me personally when like i do not feel like a suit doesn't make me feel like me yes you know what i mean like yes kind of what

you were talking about earlier like it's not that like they look great but when when i'm wearing a suit i'm just like i don't like this right i don't like the way i feel inside this i don't like walking around in a suit it's just not me i'm more kind of i'm a relaxed person you know what i mean and a suit just seems a little bit too for me right you know and this is where we could even take it where it's like okay just start to understand suiting a little bit better because if you can go into like italian tailoring with soft shoulders and it's this kind of different level of construction you can look like you wear a suit because you want to and not because you have to it can look casual and lived in and comfortable and that's what i like exactly that's what i like that resonates and so you can do suiting that way. And I guarantee you that if you were to have

something made that it hit all of those buttons, you wouldn't be wearing it all the time, but you wouldn't feel like, Oh, I hate that. I have to wear this thing when it's time to wear it. And so you get to feel like yourself when you're in that environment. And again, that's the power of clothing is it either amplifies or it mutes, depending on the direction that you're pointing it in, whatever it is that you're feeling right now, suiting is muting your sense of self. But if we change the suiting to actually do the job that it's supposed to, it will amplify your sense of self instead. I almost feel like if I were to wear a suit, like I almost don't even have the confidence to wear it. Cause like, I'm like,

am I going on to like a super important business meeting or something? Like, like, I don't even have the confidence to wear because like i'm like am i going on to like a super important business meeting or something like like i don't know i just feel like maybe i'm not important enough to be wearing a suit does that make sense no that makes perfect sense and what are the contexts in which you would actually be wearing them yeah right we weren't on your wedding was that the last time you wore your suit yes and did it feel like it was oh i enjoy i didn't mind it it was cool right because you're in the right context, right? I mean, it's the same thing. Like, aesthetically, I love togas or the way that George Washington and Napoleon would dress up. But I have no context to dress like that, no matter how cool it would look, right?

Like, there's no context for it, right? Yeah, call it macaroni and all that, right? We'll have to do another podcast wearing that. that that would be fun so the context matters and so you can feel confident when you're wearing it in your wedding because you know it's appropriate to do it you show up today in a suit it's like what are you doing dude yeah and sadly that's where so much of our culture still is is they still have this idea of i have to dress up and dress more formally to have good style but we don't live in a formal culture anymore and so suiting is not the solution to most style problems anymore and maybe you can make it look like you were in a suit at one point like

because when somebody starts the night out in a suit then they start out or later on it are unbuttoned here they roll up the sleeves they got a long sleeve you wear a long sleeve a lot buttoned down and that still looks really nice totally and then you don't need to have the the shirt tucked in yeah one of the things with a suit a traditional suit is like there's a lot going on you have like an undershirt sometimes you have like a regular shirt and then you might have like a vest over top and then you have a suit thing suit jacket over top of that you're like man i just really sealed a lot of stuff in right here i'm gonna be seven million degrees and then you also have like a lot of times you need a belt and then i don't

know your waist feels bigger and just it's like a lot of shit going on all in the same spot and you're trying to tuck everything down uh-huh and you're not sure how tucked in everything should be like it's complicated you pull your pants up over top of everything it's just like kind of a it's kind of a nightmare i'm sure there's been a lot of changes and probably a lot of advances well and honestly even if you go back in time to where you're not doing this suiting that's made with like polyester and all these other unbreathable materials but you're wearing it with like actual wool or linen and the construction is such that it breathes and it flows and it moves or really if the suit's made well you shouldn't have to wear a belt it should fit around your waist and you can you know use side adjusters or wear braces that'll actually keep it the way that

like this is one of the circumstances where if you go back towards tradition you can actually get better results and the reason that things suck so much now is because we've compromised quality, breathability, flow, movement for profit. Yeah. What are some good brands that you think are, that our audience can benefit from that are like reasonably priced? Okay. So if we're talking suiting, I would say probably the most accessible one would be Suit Supply.

They're going to be Suit Supply. They're going to be a good one. If you want to go a little bit more and you're comfortable doing more of the custom stuff and doing online, huge bias alert on this one, but one of them is a company that I used to work for. They're called Beckett & Rob. They're really great. The Armory that's based out of New York does awesome stuff with this, as does another online retailer called Articles of Style. And will they tailor stuff?

Will they go back and forth where you order something and it doesn't really so great supply will do this where it's um more of like a made it's a ready to wear where you just buy it in sizing but they will do a made to measure program whereas these other places they will actually do fully custom where like beckett and rob they will send out uh fit samples like here's jackets in three different sizes. Let's see which one is the closest fit. And then we're going to adjust. Like we need to bring the sleeves up here, take the waist in there, the shoulders a little too wide.

And then you get to play with the construction aspects of it as well. And so there's a lot of options. And this is the beauty of online stuff is that it used to be like if I wanted to buy a suit, I would have to go to men's warehouse or like maybe Nordstrom. And you think about like, they have this big geographic target demographic that they have to be able to sell to. And what's the common denominator there. And I'm not going to fit in that. Nobody's going to fit into that very well. But when you buy from online companies, they can like barbell apparel, their entire target demographic is jeans for dudes who lift like that's it because there's not enough of that in Vegas where they started,

but because they're not just selling to dudes in Vegas, they're selling all over the world. There's enough guys who experienced that frustration that they can build an entire business around it. Guys with big butts. Yep. Can you go too far the other way though? Cause,

um, I'm, this is from experience, like a buddy of mine, you know, I want to get him to lift, but he will tell you everything about like fashion and so on and like everything in and out. And I'm like, dude, you probably would look a lot better if you just went and did some squats or something. So is there like is that pretty common? pretty common? I would say, I see a lot of this sometimes, especially with younger guys. I call them gentle dorks, but it's the young guys who don't really have a lot of like masculine capital or gravitas about them. And they think, okay, if I can dress like a traditional man, then that's the only thing that I need to do. And people will treat me like I'm a professional, competent, dignified man. And they're still like, they have no physique. They have no presence. They're still timid and afraid of everybody else. And so it

actually creates this really bad juxtaposition of like your clothing sends one signal and everything about you sends the opposite signal. And now it just shows and highlights how bad the rest of this is. It's another incongruence that you're talking about. Exactly. Lipstick on a pig. There call it. There you go. Yes. And that's why they're gentle. Like they think they're gentlemen, but they're dorks. They're gentle dorks. And if you can do it where you like, I mean, you guys know this, like your demeanor changes, your posture, your body language changes. If you go from just strength training to combat sport training, right? Yeah. And people may not be able to quantify that where it's like, oh, I can tell he stands on the balls of his feet more than he does,

but they can feel that there's a difference, right? And so this is the beauty of all of this is there's this synergy. Like you get your physique on point, you get your mindset with just your physical awareness and your ability to do violence in a defense situation or anything else like that. And then you supplement that with clothing

that looks like you actually have some self-respect and you're not just desperate that these are the only things that matter you look like a multi-dimensional person instead of a one-dimensional person everything changes and they have this like synergistic power where they all amplify off of each other as opposed to just one kind of like mitigating the other one it would be some good options if we want to go a step down from a suit? Like if we wanted to just look great and just have a nice maybe button up, polos, things like that. Okay. So I'm going to push back on that a little bit because you're still falling into the

formality trap. Got it. I would say if you really want to start improving your style, just wear the same things you're already wearing, but do them better. So you don't have to dress up more. So if you're a jeans and t-shirts and sneaker kind of guy, don't go into a button up and chinos, still wear jeans and sneakers and t-shirt, but do it so that they fit well. And it's solid colors as opposed to like graphic tees or that your sneakers are not actually like running shoes, but they're

vintage sneakers that have some good shape. And maybe they're made out of leather as opposed to being made out of a composite or something else that way and so maintain whatever your level of formality is just execute on it better get things that are different textures or that it's higher quality construction little variables like that and what's fun is that it kind of pisses people off because they're like you're wearing the same thing that i am why do you look so much better wearing the same thing that i am and it's because it's that little subtle execution that comes with it yeah and maybe that's where you should invest your money is on something that's a little higher quality right if you got the opportunity yeah because i mean again like unless you're in an

environment where you're wearing suits frequently don't go buy a suit you don't need it you would be way better off doubling what, doubling the amount of money you spend on t-shirts and having them look better with how frequently you're in them. Or there's even an element of like changing how you wear things. Like I love that you've got your tank top tucked in. Oh yeah. Right.

Like there's an element of, because here's, you don't dress like that. You don't wear a tank top and gym shorts with the shirt tucked in unless you want to have it tucked in this is true right yeah and even this is a little bit of a like the gen x resentment of tucked in t-shirts right of like oh i have to do this because of school or church or whatever else right and you're flipping it on its head because now the untucked shirt more often than not looks like some dad bod gen x dude who's

trying to hide the extra weight whereas this kind of highlights it's like no you don't have anything to hide and i'm tucking it in because i want to not because i have to and so i'm actually giving a middle finger to the old perception of what tucked in shirts are and all of that is just communicated by right it's just the first thing in the morning in SEMA. But it's all subconscious because he resonates with it. I'm pulling that out of his head, right? You are correct. And so that's what's fun is all of this does happen in the background in our subconscious. I just teach you how to make it more conscious so that you can be deliberate about it and do it on purpose instead of like throwing a dart blindfolded and

hoping you get a bullseye because it's way more fun and you get way better results if you know what you're doing you do it on purpose instead of on accident how about uh like how do we build a wardrobe because you hear that a lot um early on i went through one of those companies where like they send you stuff and then you build on top of that those like similar colors i had no idea what i was doing yeah these days i would usually wear black or gray just kind of that's just what i do now cool um just to simplify things but for everybody else uh like what should people start with and then build from there okay so again i would say start with what you're what it is that you're already wearing right and then if you want it to be kind of the most minimal and the most

versatile colors keep everything solid and avoid patterns so avoid patterns avoid graphics things like that and then the colors that are going to be the most versatile black white blue brown and gray you can get away with a lot within just those colors and for a lot of guys that feels like a really good place for them to be in they've got a good versatile wardrobe it's minimal like they've got a lot to be able to alternate through for other guys. It can start to get real boring and real stale real quick. And so that's when you need to start factoring in other variables. Like what is it that I do? What are my hobbies? What are these things that I want to communicate about myself? How do I bring in these other aspects of my life? And then you start to expand because the goal

is to be able to the one time in your life that you're in a suit, you feel like the best version of yourself when you're in a suit. And every day when you get on your gym clothes, you still feel like a million bucks when you're in your gym clothes and you have the entire range of everything. I mean, you guys, it's the same philosophy that you have with your movement, right? You're not just like one-dimensional lift-heavy things and like that's it you got i mean the number of things that we have scattered around here with like we've got toe spreaders and we've got balance beams and we've got all this other stuff because you chafe at the idea of there's one size fits all answer to health right and you start with something super crucial like strength training it's a fantastic foundation but you don't get

stuck there because then you start to, you start to retard yourself and your ability to actually become the best version of yourself. And so it's the same thing with clothing. Start with, you could, you can make that equivalent of like solids that are not more formal and it's those five versatile colors. That is your basic like three by five level of strength training. And once you get that down really well, start to expand into everything else too. So you have a hot date coming up and you look in your closet and all you see are the old ugly clothes that you're usually wear and you're going to wear tonight. It's time to end that guys. That's why we've partnered with Viore clothing because they have some amazing athleisure clothes that you can wear in the gym when working out, but also clothes

that you can wear on a date or during Hanukkah or whatever. You can wear these clothes wherever and they feel amazing. Some of our favorites are the Ponser Performance line, which has DreamNet fabric, which literally feels so soft on your skin. But they also have this. This is the Rise Tee, also soft, also feels nice and fits great. And they have a lot of amazing clothes that you need to check out to step your fashion game up. We're trying to help you out. Andrew, where can they get it? Absolutely.

You guys got to head over to Viori.com slash Power Project. That's V-U-O-R-I dot com slash Power Project. And you'll automatically receive 20% off your order. Links to them down in the description as well as the podcast show notes. Andrew, see if you can bring up that video video of kenny uh where he was talking about like uh yeah wearing a shirt different ways and like how to look jacked i think it was i think it was uh is it on anabolic activities i know it's on youtube but i think that was like a different version it's on uh i think it's on his instagram i'll find see if you can find it but let's kind

of switch gears just a little bit and talk about trying to dress i guess appropriate for the gym you know like i think many years ago it seemed like people didn't care quite as much or maybe there just wasn't the clothes the same clothes there are now there's like uh kind of this leisure wear that's more high-end it's made with better material there's like lululemon and a lot of clothing brands like that, Viore, obviously. And so how can someone just upgrade their gym look a little bit? Yeah. Okay. So I would say when it comes to the gym, the most important thing that you can do is think about whatever's going to make you feel the most present when you're there. You can think about like, we have our hype music or we use smelling salts, or we have like our routine for when we get under

the bar, like all these little things that we do to get ourselves in a mindset of being ready to actually like move the bar or do whatever it is that we've come to do. Your clothing can be a tool that's just as appropriate for that. So what is it that you can wear that can help you feel more present? And that's going to be different depending on your level of, again, comfort with blending in versus standing out. Because for some guys, they can feel present irrespective of what anybody else in the gym thinks about what they're wearing. And so they can just entirely focus on them and what's going to trigger their mindset the way that they want it to be. If that's you, roll with that. If you're one who's just like, okay, I don't need to get a ton of attention but if i'm feeling

self-conscious that i look like an idiot in a gym full of other people then dress in a way that doesn't make you feel like an idiot in front of other people so that that's not nagging you and buzzing in the back of your head but you're actually there and free to focus on the work that you're doing and so i have no idea what that looks like for anybody in particular because it's so different but think about what is it that's going to make me the most present and the most capable of actually focusing on the task at hand instead of distracting me from all these other variables and different people have different intentions. Like the gym is a great place to meet people. So sometimes you might want to wear something that makes you pop a little bit.

Yeah. Because that's part of being present. Cause you're not just there to lift. You're there to socialize. You're there to date. You're there to whatever. And so. I know someone's going to comment the gym isn't for that. But hey. Not your gym. Not your way.

Exactly. Not your intentions. Yeah. So I would say, yeah, think about what it is like the entire job. Yeah. And then what your clothing can do to help you best do that job. You know, before we do get to this video, though, I wanted kind of ask you something because there's a, like, there's a lot of people who let's say they're not in the shape they want to get in yet. And their clothing, they kind of get clothing that does hide their body. You're not usually going to see people who are bigger and out of shape

wearing clothes that accentuate certain parts of their body or really show anything because they might be insecure about that. So that being said, like how can somebody that is a bit, you know, overweight in certain areas, how can they, you know, what, what should they be thinking about in terms of style? Cause everyone wants to look good. I would say the first thing is you're not actually hiding anything. Um, a lot of times we kind of like self-deceive ourselves and think that we are. And that's whether you're the scrawny guy who's wearing oversized stuff

because you think it makes you look bigger. It actually makes you look smaller. Or you're the giant guy that thinks that you're hiding it by having things be. Then you just look like you're overweight and sloppy. And so you're actually exacerbating the problem. Don't lose your train of thought. Don't lose your train of thought.

I remember when I was younger, I was kind of always oddly insecure about having big legs. I've had big legs since I was a kid, since I played soccer. I wore husky jeans. And even my early 20s, I had a little bit of an insecurity with that. So I would wear slightly bigger shorts, slightly bigger pants, so people wouldn't realize how large my fucking quads were. And it just made me look bad. Totally disproportionate, where it's like this, boom.

Yeah, dude. Right? yeah yeah so it does it exacerbates the problem and so really i would say irrespective of your build especially for guys with shirts like here's the thing if you can find shirts that they are snug in the chest the traps the shoulders and the arms and you've got a little bit of drape down through the waist and through the seat it's going to be flattering on you even if you've got a little bit of drape down through the waist and through the seat, it's going to be flattering on you. Even if you've got a belly to hide, it's going to hide it a little bit, but you're going to show off that like you're big enough to fill out the rest

of this. And then even for the guys who are really in great shape, this is one of the problem I see with a lot of fitness guys is they wear stuff that's so skin tight that it comes across as very self-conscious where it's like, you guys can see my abs. Please tell me you can see my abs. I need to know that you can see my abs please acknowledge my abs and it's like okay so if that's the only thing you bring to the table great i can see your abs

wonderful i'm so glad that your entire value hinges on that can you put on a different shirt right and that's what comes across and so i would say irrespective of your build do wear shirts that it's snug up here, a little bit of drape down here. And what's fun is that as you make your progress, the drape is going to look more flattering as you get leaner down there. And the tightness is going to also look more flattering as you make more progress up there. And so your clothing can become kind of a mental barometer where you're like, this is moving right in both directions. And so it can help you feel more motivated to continue to put in the work at the gym to continue to be disciplined with your diet like it's another it's another like feather to add into your cap of like oh this is i'm seeing

pluses here not just on the scale or when i'm getting out of the shower or anything else yeah let's uh play this clip check it out let's play this clip check it out quick cheat code on how to look way more jacked than you actually are the first step is to get a giant t-shirt it's gonna give an illusion your frame is way bigger than it actually is see none of this is real muscle I'm sure it's like a dress it lays on your physique lays on the chest makes the chest look nice and puffy you can see the delts you can see the cut from the trap and then your delt pop covers your whole arms hides your waist get a black shirt not a white one i could have a 20 inch waist you'd never know but i don't i do a lot of

neck training so you don't want to look like you have a pencil neck like this you want a big neck you can't see the traps as good it makes the neck look a little bit smaller i look like i'm fat you know if you got puffy nipples you're kind of screwed you know you always got to go like this air the shirt out kind of walk like this so it doesn't you don't expose yourself it looks like it doesn't i don't even train arms look how lengthy my arms look like what is this so follow along for more cheat codes of anabolic activity this is obviously muscle dysmorphia just a little bit this is a 250 pound 22 year old bodybuilding kid he's just messing around which when i walk in with my kids it's a big boy oh man yeah he was just having some fun with that right but notice the areas that he emphasized

right there's all the same ones that i listed yeah right yep yeah we have uh some strong shirts here at super training and uh the bigger guys are always like i love these shirts because it does I listed. Right. Yep. Yeah, we have some strong shirts here at Super Training. And the bigger guys are always like, I love these shirts. Because it does kind of hug the chest, the shoulders, the arms with leaving some room down below. How about accent pieces? I'm not even sure exactly what that is, but like. Jewelry?

No, I mean, like, you know, again, like I wear nothing but like dark, like black or gray clothes. But then I might like today just happened, again, like I wear nothing but like dark, like black or gray clothes. But then I might like today just happened on accident. But today I threw on red shoes, you know, so like, oh, maybe that was a good thing. Maybe it was a horrible thing. I'm not sure. Gotcha. Okay.

So the easiest way to be able to execute on it is to do what you've done. You've done it really well is you can think about like everything that you have on is kind of an anchoring piece where it's neutral, it's solid, it's nothing too crazy. And then you wear one go to hell kind of like really loud accent piece. Because otherwise, if you get conflicting things, it's like, what is this clown doing? Like, what am I looking at? Am I looking at a shirt or shoes or like, what is it that's going on? And you look like you're going crazy with it. And so stick with everything being neutral, except for whatever you want your statement piece to be. And then the other thing that I would do is I wouldn't do it on accident. I would think about like, what is it that like, am I feeling more

aggressive today? Do I want more attention today? Am I wanting people to not bother me today? Like, what is it that I'm, what is it that I'm feeling? What do I want to do with my day? And then do I use my statement pieces, either the existence of or the lack thereof, to help contribute to that? Okay. Are dudes overdoing hoodies? Yeah. I would say hoodies are kind of the equivalent of a security blanket where there's just this sense of, again, I get to disappear and kind of fade into the background. And, I mean, if you think about it, so many guys getting them,

I'm sure a lot of the listeners right now are like, there's some level of emotionality of like, don't come after my hoodie. Right? And think about that. Next he's going to come after my cargo shorts. Right? But why is there? Better not.

Why is there an emotional connection to that clothing? You are emotionally connected to it. Why? Because your identity is rooted in, okay, this is one of the biggest differences between men and women is, you know, and you already hit on this. Most people think that caring about your clothing is the domain of women and it's an effeminate thing to do. And when it comes to trends and changing your clothing, communicating with clothing, caring about what other people think about clothing, Changing your clothing, communicating with clothing, caring about what other people think about clothing, the balance is shifted and way more women do that than men do. But when it comes to my identity is entirely rooted in and expressed within my clothing, men do this way more than women do.

Where there's some guys, I'll tell you guys who this is off air. You forget that it comes from like skateboarding and surfing and hip hop. And you forget that it comes from these cultures. It comes from these cultures that you belong to. And your identity is rooted in that. I'll tell you guys who it was, but I was talking to a mutual friend and he was getting ready to go to a wedding overseas and he didn't want to go.

He didn't want to go to this awesome Italian wedding because he was going to have to wear a suit to the wedding and he didn't get to be in his gym shorts and his t-shirt and it's like think about how strong your attachment to that clothing is that you don't get to go support somebody at a wedding go to this awesome place be a part of this incredible party because you can't wear the clothing you want to wear there's so much emotionality that's attached to it sounds like my knee-jerk reaction to a wedding like oh i gotta get dressed well let me ask this man what articles of clothing do you think need to die like just this is don't wear that anymore because i know you can make anything work

right but like generally what needs to die okay um basketball shorts that go past the knees there we go that's what you were hoping for, right? And women are still wearing them. Oh, man. Well, yeah, that's fine. Chicks can get a little bit. And I mean, like, I get it. When Michael Jordan was doing it, it was edgy. Like, he was a trendsetter.

Like, it was very cool to be able to do that. But that's like dad clothes now because we're that far out of it. Pete Rubish, where you at? Somebody is going to pick a fight with me before I get home. So I would say that um i personally especially when you understand like the history of crocs you guys do you guys remember the movie idiocracy yes yeah do you know this story that's such a good movie it's such a good movie it's terrifying how accurate of a movie that is right coming real i've never seen it's amazing but those were the idiot shoes those were the idiot shoes of the future yes really mike judge saw those before they had really made it big and he's like these I've never seen it. It's amazing. But those were the idiot shoes. Those were the idiot shoes of the future.

Yes. Really? Mike Judge saw those before they had really made it big. And he's like, these look like the kind of things the morons in the future are going to wear. And that's what he had everybody wear. Easy to slip off. And that's fine. Right?

Like, that's fine. But people who wear them on the daily, that's the problem. Okay. And so I would say most clothing is kind of that way where it's like, okay, cargo shorts, you work construction, which really you should be wearing pants instead of shorts. But like you need the actual pocket space. But I'm sorry, bro. Like your fifth backup cell phone that you need for your accountant job and you read tactical stuff on the internet, like you don't need cargo shorts. Okay. Get a fanny pack.

Thank you. They say the only thing cargo shorts can't hold is a conversation. There you go. Right? And I'm sure the Zoomers are going to find a way to make cargo shorts cool again because that's what they're doing with everything else. They will. What about a fanny pack? Okay.

There's two ways to do it. One is to just kind of embrace the irony and have them be fun like one of my one of my best friends there there we go that's that's your gameplay i love fanny one of my best friends just bought one yesterday it's a dare that's like bright neon green and you know like has the dare and all of that and go for it you just roll with it and kind of because i think this is another one of the things i actually love this about gen z i'm an older millennial you know we're Gen X and millennial. And we grew up in a culture of so much like angst and resentment and like

dystopia and everything else. And a lot of our clothing represents that. And seeing Gen Z, unfortunately just be like steeped in dystopia that they are now able to just find some optimism in it because they're not in the decline. They're already at the bottom. This is a sad way to look at it but like this is kind of where we are right and so there's a lot more playfulness a lot more fun a lot more expression without this fear of like oh i'm not going to look like i'm edgy or i'm dangerous or that i'm i'm doing it

in an ironic way and again you go back in time and men historically have been able to be multi-dimensional and incorporate elements of playfulness and fun and self-expression and way. And again, you go back in time and men historically have been able to be multidimensional and incorporate elements of playfulness and fun and self-expression and these aspects into their clothing. It isn't always so serious or always so edgy or dangerous all the time. And so I love that you can do that, that you can play with fanny packs and have it be fun. And there's this element of optimism. And again, you think about this, this idea of capacity of like, I understand that the world we're in is pretty weird right now. And I can still have a good time with my life, even though I take things seriously.

Yeah. What that reflects back on you, what that communicates to other people, like that's all wins there to be able to do stuff like that. My cousin told me that when I run, I look like a gay freight train. And I just said, thank you.

He's like, you got purple shorts and pink shirt and he's like i don't know what the hell's going on right neon shoes yeah i'm like okay but i love that because running culture is kind of that way like i when i was doing uh ragnarok a couple weeks ago like i got this giant neon like this neon running hat that looks like it's a trapper keeper from 1994 and like that's part of running culture and i'm not going to wear that if i go into a power lifting gym but i'm not going to wear a singlet if i'm going out running either right and so like i love that you can recognize that and lean into that a singlet while running

that's the next one gosh man how about uh like jewelry on men because i think a lot of men have a even when i was when i was younger I'd have a – but I don't know. What do you think about that? Okay. So there's a way to do it right and a way to do it wrong because, again, we think of this more from a feminine frame, which is it's pretty. It looks aesthetically good. It was there on like the impulse rack because I was checking out I'm going to buy it. That's not the way that men should do jewelry.

Do it – think about it the way that you do with tattoos. It has to tell a story. It has to represent something that was an accomplishment. The cool thing about jewelry versus tattoos is it can actually be handed down. You know, like my son can wear my watch or can wear one of my rings or something else like that. You know, like this one, I have a brother who took his own life last year and I've got his ashes in here. And so this is what I see when I think about it every day in this cuff. Like there's a little compartment in there where I've got some of his ashes in there. And so if it has meaning, if it has symbolism, like this is a religious ring, you know, like there's a wedding ring obviously has meaning to

it as well. Like if you can tell a story with it to yourself, wear it and have it. And the cool thing is, is you can kind of infuse a story into anything you want to. And also from a dating perspective, if you're wearing jewelry, and I guarantee you, women will ask you what it is that you have on, and then you have stories to be able to tell. This was from this trip, or this was based on this business accomplishment, or this is from my grandpa or whatever else.

Again, you look like a fully rounded Renaissance man instead of just this single-dimensional side character in somebody else's story. What are things that maybe have been attractive that you weren't expecting, like something like jewelry or something like an accent with your clothing? Has there been things that you were kind of surprised or shocked that it worked for somebody to get with somebody else? Yes.

Okay. So, and again, we're going to like Gen Z and kind of where trends are that it worked for somebody to get with somebody else. Yes. Okay. So the, and again, we're going to like Gen Z and kind of where trends are and stuff right now. But the thing that I'm finding so surprising and not only surprising that it's picking up momentum, but finding surprising that I'm enjoying it as much as I am. I love even their terms for it too. So wife beaters,

they now call wife pleasers or wife respecters. And it's very like tongue in cheek, right? But they will do, it's so funny, right? It's so funny. And so they will do

wife beaters that are tucked into like dad jeans, like think light wash 501s, like nineties, like full house dad jeans with camp

collar shirts. Like think of not like big baggy Tommy Bahamas, but like 1950s versions of these things. And it's a really cool look. It's a good look. Yeah.

Right? Yeah. Oh, good. You're already on board. Right? And I mean, you think about it because they tuck in. Maybe look like you're going to go to a concert kind of thing. Well, a little bit, but there's also this element of, okay, so like you tuck in the wife pleaser.

I just giggle every time. Because it shows off the physique because really like you can't do tuck shirts unless you've got some level of physique to be able to pull it off right same thing even they're doing high-waisted stuff again which is fascinating right and so you do that and so it shows like some discipline and good proportions but the the millennial and the gen x version of this is like that's it i'm work and grind and I'm turning all of my hobbies into side hustles and like work, work, work, you know, Gary V type of stuff. And then these guys throw on like the retro, um, Magnum PI Aloha shirts over it. And so you have the

discipline that's communicated with one aspect of it, but then that, again, that optimism, that playfulness, that fun that's communicated with the other. Because it's very different than when boomers will wear their XXXL Tommy Bahama where it just looks like, leave me alone. I don't want to talk to anybody. Let me retire and die in peace. Right? Versus this other playful version.

Exactly. To top everything off. But there's this playful version of it that these guys are doing. And if you would have told me five years ago that that's a style I would have seen and not only, again, loved personally, but seen really kind of like get some momentum, I wouldn't have believed it. But I love it. It's really fun to see it. What kind of shoes do you top that thing off with? This is where I'm struggling with the shoes because some of these guys are going really, they're going really dad shoe on these.

I think the best thing you can do with those classic sneakers or even like some desert boots or some like some wallabies or some other shoes like that. Like there's, there's some ways that you can make that stuff work. Yeah. I hate shoes anyway. I know this is, this is the hard thing for you guys. That's the hard thing. I've yet, I have quite a few clients who are really anxious to find decent looking, like wide toe box, barefoot style shoes that don't exist.

There are some brands that are doing some really good jobs, like for the casual stuff. But I forget some of their names. It's the dress shoes that don't work. Oh, yeah. You can't make those look good. Those are tough. Which this is where you need like. I think it's been a status thing to make them kind of narrow.

Right. Yeah. I wish that we had a little bit more of like that Roman vibe of like, no, we're just going to do gladiator sandals and that's part of our formal wear. Yes. That's one thing. A suit and sandals. It is hard for some people to get behind sandals. Like either you don't care and it's like, okay, cool.

These are comfortable. Let's my feet move. Or you're like, those are women's sandals. That's one thing you hear some guys say. Those are women's sandals like either you don't care and it's like okay cool these are comfortable lets my feet move or you're like those are women's sandals that's one thing you hear some guys say those are women's sandals so tough tough life there's the aversion there so that's the brand sorry i was looking have you heard of limbs shoes no pull them up i will yeah absolutely not a sponsor but they have a bunch of cool like uh i don't even know what exactly all the terms are called but they do have dress shoes they have like um you know boots and stuff whatever it's very like a like a hiking outdoorsy vibe yeah but i'll pull up some more as you guys are talking we'll go from

there cool yeah there's a brand i like a lot it was icarus which is not uh it's not necessarily dress shoe it's more casual they They have one shoe, right? They have two now, but I guess the black ones are pre-orders. So yeah, they still have one, I guess, at the moment. Oh, gotcha. Power Project family, your normal shoes are making you weak. This is why I partner with Vivo Barefoot Shoes, because they have a wide toe box, they're flat, and they're flexible. So with every single step you're taking, if you're taking a 10-minute walk outside or when you're working out in the gym, your feet are able to do what they're supposed to do in this shoe. They have tons of options for hiking, running, training in the gym, chilling and relaxing, casual shoes. If you're out on a date, you need to check them out.

And Andrew, how can they get it? Yes, that's over at vivobarefoot.com slash powerproject, and you guys will receive 15% off your order automatically. Again, vivobarefoot.com slash powerproject. Links to them down in the description as well as the podcast show notes. You know, it is kind of hard to find like the ones where your actual foot is going to fit in there

without it getting kind of squeezed. But hopefully it's only an occasion where you'd have to wear these just for a little while. Well, and again, I think that there's some ways that you could play with this where if you are wearing stuff that you, again, because think about when you guys have to wear dress shoes, most of the time it's for more celebratory things like weddings and stuff like that

as opposed to going to courts or a big business meeting or something else. And so this is where you can get away with like the English print, espadrilles. It's like a Spanish type shoe. And so this is where you can get away with like the English print, espadrilles, espadrilles. It's like a Spanish type shoe. You can look those up where they've got like a rope sole. And you remember Tom's? Yeah. So it's like the actual version of those,

like that those were built on and they stretch. And so they actually like are designed to fit your feet that way. There's a brand that I just got turned on to that I just ordered a pair. They're called Saba. It's S-A-B-A-H. And they're leather and they're kind of shaped like that. But same thing, like you buy them and they stretch out. And so they actually like work with your feet as opposed to your feet having to be shaped within the shoe. And you can do that in a way where you wear that with like a good linen suit that's deconstructed without a tie and you're at a wedding. Totally appropriate. You don't always have to wear like

wingtips or a derby or something else that way. Yeah. I'm curious about this because we're probably going to come back to the clothing. But how about like facial hair? Yeah. Because a lot of guys, it's like sometimes you'll see a dude and he's rocking something. You'll be like, that doesn't necessarily work and I don't know why. So what are some things that guys need to think about when they're rocking, when they're trying to figure out what to do with their facial hair? Okay. So the first and biggest is be objective about how good your facial hair actually is.

If you look like you, you know, Eric Cartman and include a bunch of pubes on your face, you can't do it. I had that in my early 20s. I remember when it first started coming in, I was like, yeah, this is good. And then I look back at it. I'm like, I was ugly. So bad. I remember that with my sideburns as a teenager where it's just oh so bad right but that's a good example of like even you have to understand like

the cultural connotation to it because you get guys who like right now it's it's been full beards for a long time and you're seeing mustaches start to come in and i see a lot of older guys who still hold on to the goatees like it's 1998. Like just here? Right. Or like the full goatee where it comes all the way through. And it's like I know that you peaked in the late 90s because you've been wearing the same facial hair since then and you dress as if you wish it were still that time period. Right.

And again, the identity is infused in that. And again, I'm going to piss off quite a few listeners who are like, don't make fun of my goatee. You're smaller than I am. that and again i'm gonna piss off quite a few listeners who are like don't make fun of my goatee but so there's a cultural connotation of knowing like what's appropriate at given time just like you can't do a big wax handlebar mustache like you can like it's late 19th century right yeah and so know what's appropriate know what works based on your facial hair and then the other thing is when it comes to certain types like the mustache one you have to have the facial hair that works and two you have to have the jawline otherwise you get chester the molester real quick but like because you have the jawline it doesn't come across that way and so there's all these

things you have to factor in yeah you look very suspicious. Let me show you my van without any windows. Oh, Lord. I think they say similar things, too, about your haircut, your hairstyle, your facial hair, these things. Even your clothing. Most likely,

not like you're fishing around for compliments all the time, but if you don't hear anything about it, then it might be time to change it up. Like with your hair, you know, like whenever I get a haircut, people like comment on it. They forget that I have hair because I was bald for so long, shaved my head for so long. And then same thing with facial hair. I've messed around with different facial hair here and there, and sometimes people dig it. But like it gets to a point where it starts to get overgrown.

And then you're like, all right, well, this is like, just looks kind of gross. And then you get rid of it and you start over again. Right. Okay. So there's two things I would say to that. The first one is just like a tactical idea on haircuts is you want it to look like you neither just got a haircut, nor that it's been way too long since you got a haircut. You want it to look like it's kind of just fairly normal that this is where you are.

For most guys, that's maybe once every two to three weeks. But if you're someone like I'm this way where I remember my dad got really pissed off about this when I was in high school because my dad has had the same haircut forever. And for him, there's security in that. And for me, it's like I was changing my hair every six weeks, you know, trying different colors, trying to go with with different lengths like it was a mop or anything else. And so there's a certain type of person where playing with it like you don't follow that rule of looking like you've never done anything with it because the expression will trump the safety of looking like you've never done a haircut or anything else. OK. And then the other thing that I'll say to that is be very wary of compliments.

cut or anything else okay and then the other thing that i'll say to that is be very wary of compliments a lot of guys will use compliments as kind of the barometer of hey am i doing well because a lot of times compliments are a way to either a lot of times you'll get compliments when you actually don't look good but people are trying to like not like to help you feel better all the time when a woman gets her hair cut short they're like oh you look so fantastic there are some girls that can really pull that off well though every once in a while I'm with Mark

hey it will look good I'm not saying it won't look good but it won't look better necessarily not as good I think girls are thinking like alright well you're not in the chase anymore. Like one less bitch to worry about. Thank you for cutting your hair. You can just cut yourself out of the race.

I think we're on the same page. But like they will give men compliments. And it's more just like, oh, bless your heart. Like, oh, you're trying hard and it's good. Or it will be, that's interesting, but, you're trying hard and it's good. Or it will be, that's interesting, but I can't comment and say that's interesting

so I have to comment on it in a way that sounds positive. And so a lot of guys, this is where I will, a lot of my clients will be like, oh, I got a compliment on this. I'm like, that's because it sucks and they're trying to make you feel better.

And so be very careful about using compliments as your barometer for how well you're dressing. I feel like it helps also like if you have like some females in your circle that are relatively good at style because they sometimes can understand, oh, guys look good like this. I've used women in that. Well, it sounds bad. I use women as my style critiques like hey does this look good is this you know whatever and you know they're usually pretty frank with you they're like no women have led me down the realm of short shorts that's what i was like oh wow short shorts are okay and then everything was just five inches from there on you know yep they like seeing a little leg.

They do, especially when you've got good legs. Yeah. Never would have thought that. I will provide a little caution to that too, though. Let's go. Okay? Because women and men have different objectives when it comes to visually what we're communicating. And if you think behavioral psychology and all of this stuff and even when we peak peak at like sexual market fertility and all of that

type of stuff women are at their best when they're young and that's most of the time what they want to communicate youthfulness fertility energy vivaciousness all of that type of stuff men are usually better third mid-30s up to 50s and that's because we've accomplished things like we've got status and authority and credibility like we've weathered enough battles to prove ourselves. And so a lot of times I see, especially really financially successful men who just completely defer all of their dressing to their wives or to female stylists. And then these women dress these guys like they're 18 year old kids, right? and it looks like i haven't done anything with my life and so i'm trying to communicate that i've got all of this potential ahead of me

and there's massive amount of dissonance there when you have accomplished something you've gained credibility and authority and status that's what your clothing should be communicating and so if you're working with women that can understand that and can help you communicate that from an aesthetic perspective and from a communicative perspective, that's a win. But if they're just trying to make you look cute and young and trendy, you're screwed. That is true. Especially if you're 45. Right, exactly. You'll look weird. Yeah. So you do style coaching for people, right? So what is it like working with a style coach? So it's very different than working with a stylist because you can think about it from the perspective of, it would almost be like a stylist is kind of like a chef that comes in and cooks all your meals and you just eat and do what they do

what they tell you to or as a coach is going to teach you how to be able to understand what your body responds to with food and how to understand calories and macros and micros and meal timing and all of these other things and so the biggest thing is i get my guys self-sufficient rather than you're always relying on me every six months or every couple of years that like, we're going to come back, we're going to buy something new. The other big difference is that for the most part of stylist is going to start on the outside and say, this is what we're seeing on, you know, in magazines or on the runways. And these are kind of the trends and we're going to take these things and we were going to apply them to you.

You really need to start on the inside, Figure out who you are, what it is you bring to the table. I think the best way to describe what I do, I can't quite get there because there's certain medical and degrees and all of that, but it's more like appearance psychology than it is actually styling, where we start with what your identity is, what it is you bring to the table, what's the legacy that you want to leave, and how can you use your clothing as another tool in your toolkit to be able to bring that to the rest of the world and also reinforce that self-perception back on yourself. And so style coaching is actually a lot of like,

I don't even, when I work with my clients, we don't do a single round of shopping until we're two months into the program because we have to do all of this prep work to actually figure out who they are. But then when it comes time to actually buying the stuff, they feel infinitely better than they ever have in their clothes they realize that they've been kind of like trapped in this false security in what they're wearing so we they feel better and they

have an expanded version and they're better able to communicate with the people around them and so you just get i mean it really is it's like speaking is awesome and then your power expands exponentially when you learn how to read and write. Yeah. It's learning how to read and write with your clothing. Yeah. Gotcha.

You know, one thing that you have, it's in our audience a lot. And for some reason, I don't even get why you shaved your head because you had such a good head of hair. But as like baldness is something where it's hard for guys to be okay or confident with that right because like me i have a big ass head that's part like that's part of the reason why i wore hats for a while

because i'm like damn my head is so big i didn't mind being bald it's just it's a fat ass peanut head and you guys know it is too anyway i guess how can guys figure out ways to i guess get behind their baldness and find pride in it and actually style that well? What do bald guys need to think about? Maybe even just shave off that Dr. Phil looking thing. Yeah, and that's what it is because if you think about anything that's like a – Dr. Phil. Right.

If you think of anything that's like a genetic deformity or anomaly because like sadly that's the reality of it is like we see it on a biological level as that. Like your genes are a little bit defective and that's why you're balding. It sucks but that's like how it is. It's the same thing with glasses, right? Lean into it. So shave your head, fully embrace being bald. If you have to wear glasses like Andrew, like you do not have these little like lenses that are trying to disappear and fade into the background. You're owning it and it's part of it.

And so it's a very masculine approach to it of like, I acknowledge that this is here and rather than lamenting that it's a weakness, I'm going to convert it into a strength. I'm going to have an attitude about it like it's a strength. And so when it comes to losing your hair, anything that looks like you're trying to cover it up, that you're self-conscious about it is infinitely worse than the problem itself and so either like go all in and do hair plugs and get it totally taken care of or shave it and embrace going totally bald and the reality is is like you have your perception of your head being that big i've been following you for two years we met two years ago i would never be like man it seems got

a really big head like it's just not it's not in the way that I see you. You got also, you also have big delts, dude. Yeah. Like you're a big dude. I kind of joke about it. I mean, you know, it was a, it was a fun thing growing up. I kind of joke about it, but at the same time, it's like a lot of people, when it comes to baldness, it's like, it's, uh, it's tough to figure out how do I, how do I navigate with being bald? Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, if you, it's like, if you've got a and I mean if you got great facial hair, then you can flip that and you're doing good facial hair while being bald because it still kind of shows the hair aspect of it, of how that works. And honestly, another thing is like get some size on you. Okay. It really does.

There's the difference between you can be a scrawny bald dude and you look like a dork or you can be a big or jacked bald dude and you look like you're a menace. And it's, again, that context of what comes in there. Yeah. All right. You kind of started off, I think, in the clothing space and then you got more into, I guess, teaching people about like psychology and philosophy and a lot of these things. about like psychology and philosophy and a lot of these things. Where do you think today's male that's between like 18 and 35, what do you think is like, I guess, like disruptive in our society today that is maybe making a lot of those people feel like lonely and just kind of lost?

Everything. I mean, sadly, almost everything like i i really struggle and again you know i've got my son and he's here and the world that he's coming into where anything about masculinity is bad if you're a man you're just a defective woman or you're a defective human being and anything that we would normally and traditionally embrace and kind of try to encourage about men is seen as problematic or whatever the terminology is that you want to throw at it and you can look at it on the fundamental level of like endocrine disruptors and the things that are being done to us from a hormonal level as far as what we're putting into or on our bodies

you can look at it from media and the messages that are being taught you can look at it from schooling and from like i i feel like almost they're being attacked on all sides and it sucks and it also means that there's a lot of potential to do a lot of really good things with it as well and this is what i love again about the internet and this kind of like you know we talked about it a little while ago about clothing being accessible to a different demographic rather than just geographically where you are the internet makes that work with masculinity as well where if you're not around good men that really like see masculinity is a good thing and want to raise boys into that you're not just screwed because you can find communities that will embrace that online and so i'm really grateful that we're not trapped where we are but yeah yeah, to your question, it really does almost feel like everything is stacked against them right now. Yeah.

How old were you when you felt like you had like a purpose and a mission and a business? And like how old were you when you started to feel secure about what it is you were doing? Not in my 20s. Certainly not then. I think that's, you know, we were talking about this a little bit before that you have this kind of like pressure and i do i hate that we have extended adolescence in both directions where kids are robbed of the innocence of being kids at younger and younger ages are forced into adolescence at an earlier age and then we've extended adolescence into later and later ages at the same same time, we can lament that,

but making a 20-year-old kid who is actively trying to find a job, he's working on his body, he's actually intentionally working on himself, and he may not know exactly what he wants to be. He may still be living with his parents. He may not have all of the best dating. You're not a failure or a loser

because you're not there. You're just trying and you the best dating you're not a failure or a loser because you're not there you're just trying and you're growing and you're building yeah and so i think and again like i had no idea i mean i've been doing this i'm 39 this has been my full-time gig for six years i started it 11 years ago when my daughter was born and there was a lot of time of like this and custom suiting and like which one do i do and even then it was do and there was a lot of time of like this and custom suiting and like, which one do I do? And even then it was, do I go into real estate or,

you know, like anything that anybody does. And no, no, no surety or security. Certainly not in my early twenties. Certainly not as a teen. Like dude,

when I was 19, I wanted to play in an emo band. You know what I mean? Like that was what my ambitions were. And so it's, dude, when I was 19, I wanted to play in an emo band. You know what I mean? Like that was what my ambitions were. And so it's, yeah, it's later than most people think. And I think that that's fine as long as you're intentionally moving forward whatever forward looks like. Yeah, same's true for me, 35-ish. Yeah.

Yeah. 35-ish is one like. That's how old I was when I started. Yeah. Feeling more secure about like my business and my work and my career and all those things. And even if you, even if you're listening talked a little bit about my brother and we're dealing with some stuff with my wife's extended family that have really kind of shaken an emotional and an identity foundation for us. what I thought was a really secure sense of self three years ago now with my perspective is not. And I expect that when I'm 42 or 52 or whatever else, like I hope that I feel like my foundation is being shaken again because it means I'm actually growing and improving as opposed to like, nah, dude, I had everything figured out at 18 and I've just coasted since then.

Like that's way worse than feeling that little bit of imposter syndrome all the time of like am i actually doing what i'm capable of doing right now is it because of your brother's death yeah and it kind of like everything that was around that like what the dynamic was for us as kids and um what it was like for us as as siblings when we were older and adults and how the relationship was and all of these other things like it just kind of makes you not take for granted things that you've taken for granted before. And you go back and you look at your life through a different lens and it just makes you look at things differently,

which I'm really grateful for. Yeah. Yeah. Was your brother into drugs? Yeah. Yeah. And it was a balm for him where there was a lot of psychological stuff. And ironically for him, it was only marijuana.

That was the only thing. But it was enough that it triggered, like, bipolar disorder and schizophrenia. And then it really, like, brought up a lot of dissonance as far as, like, relationships with the parents and with us as siblings and everything else. And he was super manic and depressive. And it just really sucked to see that that was all there under the surface. It was just when he was high,

it would bring it out and he didn't have any of the other tools to deal with it. And I'm looking at it going, okay, how much of that is under the surface for me? Cause I'd like, I'm Mormon. I'm a member of the church of Jesus Christ,

Latter-day Saints. I've never been high in my life. I've never had a drop of alcohol or like none of that is, is a thing for me. And so I don't like, what am I bearing and how am I going to, how am I going to deal with it rather than just continuing to bury it or finding some other way that it's an escape and it ends up ruining my life. Thankfully he didn't have any kids. I can't imagine, you know, doing that to my six kids or anything else. And so it's a, it's a forced reality check and what I'm really grateful for. anything else. And so it's a forced reality check and one I'm really grateful for. Hey, Paparazzi family, shut your f***ing mouth. No, not really, but kind of. You should keep your mouth shut when you're asleep. Now on the podcast, we've been talking about the importance of nasal

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55 cents a day for tape pretty much and you'll be able to save 150 along with getting two tins a year supply of tape and a blindfold that is going to be something that you want to get your hands on. Links in the description along with the podcast show notes. Shut your f***ing mouth. I think a lot of people aren't aware that marijuana can trigger such things for people. It's not just the munchies. Did your brother start real early with marijuana? No, he didn't start until he was 33.

Oh, wow. Yeah. That's even more rare because, you know, a lot of times they say, you know, if you're under the age of 25, your brain's not developed and things like that. Nope, it wasn't until it was later. Because again, he grew up as a faithful member of our faith as well. And it wasn't until he was out here in, he's actually out in San Francisco, out in Walnut Creek,

and started to drink a little bit and then started to really get, really start enjoying THC and edibles and stuff like that. And then it just, it just flipped a switch in his brain. Wow. Yeah. How about, you know, like, let's say apps, social media, the phone, maybe TV, video games, YouTube. social media, the phone, maybe TV, video games, YouTube. How are you handling all that stuff with your kids and making sure it doesn't like spiral out of control? Yeah, okay.

So we're constantly trying to adapt and change as we need to, especially because we're of the opinion that kids are individuals. And so you need to treat kids as individuals as opposed to like a blanket approach of this is what the Guzzy household is like or something that way but we do have a few things that we're pretty consistent on like my two oldest have phones um but they have phones from a company called gab that they uh they don't have access to anything as far as like apps or internet or anything else like that because they're old enough and we're in a in a neighborhood that we can let our kids like go to the park or go

do things like that without having constantly be aware of where they are and so we like to be able to get a hold of them um my son absolutely loves video games and because of that we limit him to about a half an hour a day because we want him to be able to enjoy what he enjoys but also find enjoyment in other things and as he gets to the point where he finds more joy in other things, like right now, like we talked about earlier, he's doing jujitsu and Muay Thai.

He's loving that he's, as he's starting to develop other things that he loves, then we will relax more on the, on the restrictions because he will have more of that natural balance of like, I love, I love playing the new Zelda, but I also love doing all of these other things too. And so we want to help foster that internal compass

as opposed to it always being externally driven from us. And so that's the goal is to get them to the point where they're self-sufficient with it. But like, we're not going to do any regular smartphones or social media or anything like that until they're at least 16. And yeah, screen time is fairly limited. We're actually somewhat strict about the shows

that we let them watch because of the social conditioning that comes in with that as well. Yeah. I think you probably grew up with like, I'm imagining you grew up with a lot of rules. Yeah. And do you parent that way or do you do something different? We did for a while. And that's one of the things that with everything that's come about within the last couple of years have started to to change is recognizing that my kids are inherently good people and they have a genuine desire to be good they don't need me to instill that or enforce that in them and so maybe educate educate and train and trust and so it's not necessarily that they're a you know like the the tabula rasa that blank slate of like we have

to infuse this into them. That's there. We just need to help shape it and direct it in the right way. And it's really hard because in a lot of ways, like they get to be kids in a way that I didn't get to be a kid or that most of my peers didn't get to be kids. And there's emotional responses to that, or even this like kind of like deep elements of resentment or like these negative responses to them that, you know, when my six-year-old throws a fit, she's not actually being disrespectful. She's having a hard time regulating her emotions. But if I get pissed off about it and see it as disrespect, then there's two people that aren't regulating their emotions.

And why is it that she's responsible for regulating mine instead of my being responsible for regulating hers? And so I need to sit back and go, okay, she's not being disrespectful. She's being six. So just let her be six and then we can correct and we can talk about behavior after the emotions have calmed down yeah it is so much it's like yeah this is the hardest thing i've ever done disrespect would be about you right you know so often that's what it is is i make it about me right and it's not about me at all she's a six-year-old girl and she's sweet and innocent she's having a hard time with the fact that her two older siblings get to come on a trip with me Right. and chaos is evil. And I would say, you know, like you can hear Jordan Peterson or other people talk about that. And I would say that there are certain elements of that, but there's a big difference

between the innocent chaos of children and like the intentional chaos of people who have an antipathy for order. And so I need to not see them as anti-order, but just see them as innocent chaos. And they want order. They just need help getting there. Yeah. As a kid, I was totally was totally chaotic yeah because you're a kid yeah that's your job yeah you're not bad it is really

awesome though uh kind of how you've measured out with video games because i do know some modern parents who are they're trying to mold their kids into you know being great adults and they're like yeah no video games for them but But it's like, okay, if, if you, if they're interested in that and you never give it to them and then they get to a certain age where they have the chance, all they're going to do, you know what I mean? But like, you've given them the opportunity to be able to do and have different outlets so that gaming isn't the only thing that makes me feel good. Right. Yep. So that's just very smart way. And if you, you you. If you hold something down with one hand and then you hold something down with another hand, then you've got to use your head. Right.

Then you've got to use your foot. Yep. And you're trying to hold all these things down. I think things are going to pop up for children. Absolutely. You have to let them at least explore some of it. And you've got to be good kids. You can trust that they want to be good kids.

Yeah. Yeah. It's tough, man. My son is, at this time, I don't even think he was two years old yet but like i was just i was i forgot i think i was playing forza and like he wanted to push the buttons and i was just like oh this is yeah here like push the buttons like whatever and then all of a sudden i walk away and i come back and he's like sitting down like like hunched over with the controller in his hand playing the game like to the best that he can and i'm like whoa like that's crazy he picked

that up fast and then i'm like all right let's turn it off and he freaked out and he got really upset i'm like oh like oh man i gotta stop this now it's like i am plugged in it's just been collecting dust for you know however long it's been but i do fear what you said and seem i'm like the second he goes to a cousin's house or a friend's house and they have, you know, video games, like he'll probably never want to leave or he'll be super upset at me for not

letting him play or something. I, that's the opposite of what I want. Yep. And so like, yeah, I have to find, I used to get upset at my mom cause my dad's house was the only place I got

to play video games. Yeah. And then like, so then like what house was the fun house now right you know and so i mean so stuff like that where like you know like oh i wish we were i wish you guys were as fun as you know so-and-so's parents or something it's like whoa dude like so yeah i have to find that line or figure out how you guys have done it but also you know he's only like two and a half now and so i'm'm like, ah, the communication is like, oh man, we have so far to go.

It seems like. And so like, and that's just with one kid. Yeah. I don't know how anybody does it with more than one. I legit like just if I had hair, I'd pull it out. It gets easier with more. I remember we talked about it last time that you were here. You were like, you get better and, you know, you start learning more, but I'm like, who

we like, I just want to go to sleep for a little bit and then we'll yeah like you guys doing it for years it's like wow dude that's that's that's work it's crazy like we were we're joking the other day that we're like we only have three years andrew do you wish that your parents uh i don't know slowed you down with video games or had some sort of intervention or did they ever try i don't even know no they never did uh obviously as a kid i would definitely not want any limitations on it because like that was my thing um it would have been it would have been super healthy for them to implement something along those lines maybe give you other options or something other options or just educate like hey if you sit down all day like you're not going to become those like because i just played sports

games all the time right like i would create my create my player and then that guy would always be the all-star and stuff. If they were just involved somehow, some way to be like, if you sit here and play all day long, you'll never be that person that you're there, that you're playing. If they could have been like, if you just go out every once in a while,

you'll be a little bit closer to who you're pretending to be right now. Something like that would have been cool to just more education to be like, you just can't sit down all day long. You know, I'm like, you know, maybe, maybe I'm not saying for sure would have sparked something, but like maybe it would have versus nothing completely. Well, I think you need to give yourself a little bit of credit because I think the best way that I've heard it is more is caught than taught. And, you know, it's basically what you do as a dad. And obviously, like, you enjoy playing video games, but it's not the only thing that you enjoy doing.

And so if your kid can see that this is one part of what dad does and one part of what dad enjoys, but I also see him get just as much dopamine out of other things as he does out of other things as he does out of video games that sets the example of it's not just this at the expense of everything else or never this only everything else yeah the amount of teaching that's gone on in my household has been very little yeah just because my wife and i are always doing something we're always like she's swimming in the morning i'm lifting i'm running and the kids see it and it's like it's gonna like rub off that's on some some point and jake started coming here

to lift at super training a while back and he would just always kind of hang out on the uh the curl machine and i was like don't say anything just be happy that he's here yeah and i just let him hard right let him do it for like 18 months and then he eventually started doing other stuff and now he's like way into it so i i don't think i mean every kid is different so you do need to treat it differently um but i don't think kids need as much pressure and as much uh hoarding over as people may think i don't think so either i think that kids have a natural we've learned learned this about schooling because we've done a lot of homeschooling over the years and it is amazing how, I mean, you think about a three-year-old and it's so annoying how often they ask why, right? Because they have this natural desire to learn. Like you don't have to force a kid to want to learn.

You just have to be able to teach them. But we treat schooling like you have to force kids to want to learn. And I think it's the same thing with they want to, they able to teach them. But we treat schooling like you have to force kids to want to learn. And I think it's the same thing with they want to feel good. They want to be comfortable in their bodies. They want to have social skills. They want to be morally upright human beings. There's natural desires for all of these things. We just have to demonstrate and give a lot of mercy and a lot of instruction and set the example.

Andrew, want to take us on out of here out of here buddy yeah i have one more thing along the lines of like uh keeping video games away from my son and then all of a sudden he finds them and then like that's everything um i do have that fear when it comes to food and diet because right now he doesn't know that candy exists he doesn't he's never i mean they they've uh my parents forced like a little bit of like um a cake in his mouth and he like he spit it out he thought it was gross hold on to that for as long as so that's what i'm doing yeah and and you know i i get a lot of shit from you know family and stuff because i don't let them have anything they'll try to give them candy and i'll be like no and like swipe it out of it like i'm kind of a dick with it i'm sorry but like my son's more important

than you know your emotions towards me at the moment. Um, so with, with that though, like, how do you, how do you guys handle, you know, diet and maybe some of the yummy foods that are out there? Because I know he will be exposed to it at some point cause they're everywhere. And I want him to be at a certain age where I got this from Mark where it's like, Hey, like let him get to a certain age where he can decide, I want that cinnamon roll. And then he can actually's like, hey, like, let him get to a certain age where he can decide I want that cinnamon roll. And then he can actually understand like, oh, this is this is something different than the steak that we eat every night. Right. So I'm curious, how do you guys approach that? We don't have that one figured out yet.

I feel like we're constantly oscillating on that one where sometimes it's like, well, they're going to snack and we need to let them listen to their own internal cues of when they're hungry and when they're not. And so we're just like my wife will grocery shop at four different grocery stores to try to make sure that we've got the raw milk from here and the non-vegetable oil Pringles from here and all of these other things. And so there's an element of that. dude our neighborhood we have so many young kids and so many parents that don't feel the same way that we do about food that we know that they can just go over to their friend's house and do as much screen time as they want and eat whatever they want and so i think the overarching thing is still trying to figure out the same premise because i grew up in a household my mom was always very strict about food and i really appreciate it now as an adult like what she was trying to do and why she was trying to do it but with me and every single one of my siblings

as soon as we were able to go over to friends houses we would eat there and when we moved out on our own we ate like garbage for years it's like freedom you know and i don't want neither my wife or i want us to be the arbiters of what's good or bad for them we want them to have their own internal compasses of what it is. And so for us, that means understanding that, dude, it's a birthday party. You're 11. Eat cake, please. Like you don't have to be, because I've had times where I've been really stupid about stuff like that. And I can look back three years and say, did those calories really matter? Or did I miss out on being present at that birthday party? Because I wasn't eating, I didn't need a slice of cake and just enjoy myself.

And so we're trying to look at it from that more macro perspective of how do we help them have a healthy relationship with food? And by healthy, that means being able to understand the effects that it has on their body, the effects it has on them socially, emotionally, and spiritually as well. And so we're still trying to figure that one out. Yeah. We know the mission. We just don't know the strategy or the tactics yet. Take us on a hit here. Absolutely. Thank absolutely thank you everybody for checking out today's episode uh please drop those comments down below let us know what you guys think about this conversation there's some amazing stuff in there and stop wearing those damn and one shorts because

they're just they're kind of hideous at this point uh follow the podcast at mb power project all over the place my instagram is at i am andrew zNsema. Where are you at? Discord is down below at NsemaYinYing on Instagram and YouTube at NsemaYinYing on TikTok and Twitter. Tanner, where can people find you? Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok.

It's at Tanner Guzzi. T-A-N-N-E-R-G-U-Z-Y. I used to think it was Guzzi. Nope. 50-50 chance. Fuzzy Guzzi. That's what they called me in kindergarten.

Do you maybe have favorite jeans? Because jeans are sometimes a little difficult for people to figure out. Okay. So if you struggle with fit, I would say either the 541s from Levi's. Yep. Yep. Or the barbell apparel ones.

But don't go with their regular fit or their relaxed fit because their stuff is still very, very skinny. And if you don't struggle quite as much on fit my favorite actually from a california company called buck mason cool yeah all right i'm at mark's millie bell strength is never weakness weakness never strength catch you guys later bye