Mark Bell's Power Project - Mark Bell's Power Project EP. 229 - Michelle Waterson

Episode Date: July 17, 2019

UFC Fighter Michelle "Karate Hottie" Waterson is an Mixed Martial Artist, former Invicta FC Atomweight Champion and currently ranked #7 in the UFC's STrawweight Division. She currently has 17 wins. 6 losses and has her eyes set on becoming the first Mother to become a UFC Champion.    ➢SHOP NOW: https://markbellslingshot.com/ Enter Discount code, "POWERPROJECT" at checkout and receive 15% off all Sling Shots Find the Podcast on all platforms: ➢Subscribe Rate & Review on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/mark-bells-power-project/id1341346059?mt=2 ➢Listen on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4YQE02jPOboQrltVoAD8bp ➢Listen on Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/mark-bells-power-project?refid=stpr ➢Listen on Google Play: https://play.google.com/music/m/Izf6a3gudzyn66kf364qx34cctq?t=Mark_Bells_Power_Project ➢Listen on SoundCloud: https://soundcloud.com/markbellspowerproject  FOLLOW Mark Bell ➢ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marksmellybell ➢ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkBellSuperTraining ➢ Twitter: https://twitter.com/marksmellybell ➢ Snapchat: marksmellybell Follow The Power Project Podcast ➢ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MarkBellsPowerProject Follow Nsima Inyang ➢ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nsimainyang/  Podcast Produced by Andrew Zaragoza ➢ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamandrewz

Like that's Joe Rogan. I'm on Joe Rogan's show. You know, you're like, just space out a little bit. And honestly, I was telling Josh, I honestly didn't think that he was going to have me on the show. And Josh was like, hey, we're going out to L.A. You should reach out to Joe. And I was like, you mean Joe Rogan?

And he's like, yeah. So I was like, I mean, I guess I'll give it a try. I mean, what's the worst that can happen? He can say no, you know. So I reached out to him and I said, hey guess I'll give it a try. I mean, what's the worst that can happen? He can say no. So I reached out to him and I said, hey, we're going to be in town. I'd love to come by and say hi, maybe check out the studio, maybe get on the podcast. I just threw it out there.

And he was like, he just texted me back. He said, yeah, sure. Wednesday at noon. See you then. And then I was like what is that I guess we're just going to roll in right into it

okay there we go we're ready to rock I was like what does that mean like does that mean I'm just going to come by to see the studio

or does that mean that I'm going to be on the podcast he did the same thing to us we said hey we'd like to check out your new studio

new gym he's like good come by on this date and then he was he meant to be on the show I was like oh he meant to be on the show I i was like oh he meant to be on the show i wasn't sure what he meant either it wasn't very clear yeah were you guys nervous

oh yeah totally nervous yeah i'll have to check out that episode which episode was it we were on it several times so i do documentaries i made several documentaries and um that happened to be about stuff that joe likes so he asked us on there did one about steroids called bigger stronger faster one about the opioid epidemic called prescription thugs okay and i just finished one called a leaf of faith which is about kratom which is a natural painkiller so yeah you know some fun interesting crazy uh controversial topics that he likes yeah we were just he it's funny because it's it's kind of like a like a reoccurring theme that always comes up because of the circles that he runs in. And we were just talking about USADA and use of steroids and how often American athletes get tested

versus how often out-of-the-country athletes get tested and stuff like that. Oh, yeah. Do they get tested as often or they don't because they don't have a USADA? Yeah. It's supposed to be worldwide. But for sure, the athletes in America get tested more. And I honestly I couldn't tell you because I've never trained outside of the country for a fight camp. But from what I've heard and from teammates and some some other athletes that that have trained in both both that they've gotten tested twice as much in in the states i heard you say that you were really against steroids and um i think that that's interesting uh a lot of you know we come from a power lifting

world where everybody's like all they're not like all for it necessarily but um it's just kind of part of the game it's it's accepted bodybuilding yeah but i heard a different objective i think and i heard what you said about it and you were like i wouldn't want to do that to myself i found that to be very interesting yeah that fighters have a different mentality about it yeah i just i've never even like dabbled into it i never questioned it and it was just something like i don't know i was telling joe like i get a sense of pride knowing that i've that i did it on my own you know what i mean and but but i don't i don't know, I was telling Joe, I get a sense of pride knowing that I did it on my own. You know what I mean?

But I've never been in the bodybuilding world. I actually did. I did a... Oh, here we go. What did I do? I did a fitness show. I did a fitness show. It was like a swimsuit. Bikini competition or something like that.

Bikini competition, yeah. And it was weird because my body was too muscular. I guess it was unproportioned for what they were looking for. You were a tweener. Yeah. Because they have different categories. They have bikini, they have figure, they have fitness. I was too muscular for bikini, but not muscular enough.

Oh, yeah, it's physique it's called, right? Yeah, something like that. I don't know. But it was a great experience. But I remember getting on the stage and seeing all these beautiful women. And I know how hard they worked because I worked to get through all of the, what do you guys call it? Prep.

Do you call it a camp? Prep, they call it. Okay. Competition. Yeah, competition. And, I mean, these girls completely transform their bodies and, and to be picked and prodded at and, uh, in a competition and to be told that your body isn't, you know, isn't up to par, I think can kind of mess with your head a little bit.

Yeah, definitely. And I did a bodybuilding show and it was like, when the show was over, it was really kind of depressing for a couple of days days because I like didn't know where to go from there sort of like he reached this goal I got myself you know really lean and in good shape and I was like what do I do after this you know and you can't maintain that yeah conditioning and I think that's really hard especially for women because they're going to gain probably you know some cases 20-30 pounds yeah which is a lot of weight to put back on right yeah I mean it's the same in the fight world. You know, we cut down. So my fight weight is 115, but I probably walk around 130, 135.

And so I think it does miss, it can miss you with your head if you're not mentally strong, you know, to see your body go from like absolutely shredded out to kind of like a normal body. And it's not even normal. Like people would look at me and say like you look athletic what do you do this and that but you know and in my standards i'm like no i don't look good this and that and how much do you think you weigh when you actually compete on the day of i heard you guys talking a lot about weight cuts maybe an extra 10 pounds from where you started you know it really depends this last time i was able to um hydrate back up very well um so I the the week of uh

my last fight so they call it so it's fight camp and then it's fight week and then you have the day before weigh-ins weigh-ins and then the fight day and so fight week they make you weigh in um when you get into wherever it is that you're fighting. And what was I weighing when I was? 124. So I weighed 124 when I got there. And it already started kind of like, you know, making my meal smaller and water loading. And so by the time the day before weigh-ins came, I was like 121. I cut to 116.

And then I floated a pound overnight. So I woke up on weight. And then I was actually able to rehydrate all the way up to 128. Oh, wow. What's that feel like? Because like in bodybuilding or powerlifting, especially in powerlifting, we drop weight to make a certain certain weight class and then we just like basically pig out and eat as much as we possibly can because we don't have to move around a lot yeah we don't have to fight so uh have you ever like overdone it you ever like eat too much and then like your your legs aren't the same like you know

all the blood goes to your legs and stuff and yeah especially the adrenaline dump that you get and everything else you ever overdone it? Absolutely, for sure. Getting there, you feel a little sloshy, maybe slow. Yeah, and I think it's just like situational too. Before you get into huge organizations like the UFC, you travel and you do smaller events at smaller venues. I remember one time flying all the way to North Dakota and not meal prepping or anything like that

and kind of just doing it the old school way, sauna suits and running and just cutting out food, just a really unhealthy way. Rehydrate with Snickers bars and stuff like that. The only food that they had,, it was at a, it was an Indian hotel casino. And the only food they had there was like a buffet of food that had been sitting out for hours and it was all filled with sodium and I was swollen and bloated. It was horrible.

I won the fight though. So how did you, uh, how'd you get into all this? How'd you get into fighting? I grew up doing martial arts. I have an older brother, so he's four years older than me. I wanted to do gymnastics. It was too expensive for my parents to to allow me to do that. And so there was this little community martial arts class going on at the church.

Karate or something? Yeah, it was karate. And it's something all three of us could do. So my parents put us all in and we absolutely fell in love with it. And I think it was, you know, at the time we were all huge, you know, movie fanatics.

And so it was Mortal Kombat and Power Rangers. I was just going to ask you that. What are the, yeah, what are the pop culture influences on you? You know, obviously like we're a little bit older. So for us, it was Bruce Lee. Yep. And it was-

Karate Kid. Karate Kid was like our jam. Well, I mean, my dad loved watching anything, Jean-Claude Van Damme and- Steven Seagal. Steven Seagal, Sylvester Stallone, like all those guys, like they were the big cats at the time.

So we watched all that stuff like kickboxer. Um, and yeah, yeah. Bruce Lee, I think sport, what a sport. I actually saw that come on TV this a few weeks ago and I was watching it with my kids and my kids were laughing so hard.

They're like, this is the cheapest movie. I'm like, you don't understand. This is the best thing he had at the time. You just don't get it. Like this is so cheap. It's so corny. I'm like, you don't understand. This is the best thing he had at the time. You just don't get it, kids. It's so cheap. It's so corny.

I remember that because my brother, he was born in Thailand. And when he came over to the States, my dad told him that he could pick his American name. And at that time, he was really into Mad Max. And so he picked his name to be Max. really into Mad Max. Um, and so he, he, he picked his name to be Max. And, um, you know, when they came out and revamped Mad Max, I was like, this is cool. I'm going to go back and watch the old school one. And it was so slow. So yeah, it takes forever to get going. It was like out in the middle of the desert. Nothing's going on. You're like, come on. But the newer one was so cool. Yeah, it was so visual. loved it yeah i love the whole just

the idea of kind of like an apocalyptic kind of like for on your own and kind of just fending for yourself idea with where like mma is now does karate still work can you pull off some karate moves in there for sure i absolutely believe it does you have to know when and where to use it but it's actually a very effective martial art for MMA because it's um well from the martial arts from the karate that I learned it was it was American freestyle karate so my instructor was a boxer but he also did tempo and karate and taekwondo so he kind of integrated all of them together in and looked at you as um as an individual and says well okay because you have really good kicks i'm gonna teach you some of these cool taekwondo moves

you know or because your your shoulders are nice and strong i'm gonna teach you these boxing moves um and so he kind of he um adapted what he learned and just taught kind of a mixture of his own his own style and that's why they called it just American freestyle karate but um I learned like point sparring um with karate and so my kicks are really good I was really flexible and I was really strong and explosive and so in point sparring it's it's the first person that gets the point and um I was always a smaller person because it never went by weight in in karate it always went by your age and your your belt level so I I was just I was always a smaller person and um I learned very quickly to just use my kicks to my advantage because I was a smaller person. I just let them come in and then kicks to the head were two points versus one. And so, um, I would rack up my points because

I would just sit back and let them come in and just pop them in the head real quick and then move out the way. And, um, in MMA, because of the small gloves, you, you do want to be the first, you want to be the first to capitalize and so i think that's transferred over well very well how was it um with uh you know women's mma we we talk about this all the time we find it like so exciting i find watching the women fight they go at it they scrap it's really exciting i thought in the beginning i wouldn't like it but i think ronda rousey really changed that for me dana white said, you'll never see a woman in the UFC. Remember? He had that quote years ago. And so to see Ronda come in and kick ass, I was like, yes, I love her like right

away. And what did you think seeing her come up and all that stuff and where were you at in your life at that point? Before you knew of Ronda R rousey did you know any other female fighters i've just heard of my new cyborg yeah from a strike force and that was about it because before ronda was before ronda was even competing in the ufc i was fighting my first my first fight was in 07 and so you know i i didn't know of ronda. I knew of Gina Carano. I knew of Julie Kenzie. Oh, yeah, Gina Carano. I knew of Cyborg. And so I think what Ronda Rousey did to open up the floodgates for the females is gave us a voice.

voice because I think for a long time the female fighters would get shut down if they were too loud because they're like whatever your girl trying to be in the man's sport whatever so I think the mentality for a lot of the girls was let me just you know keep my head down and stay in the grind and just show everybody what I can do rather than talk, you know? And so that's what a lot of the girls that I watched did. They just, they just grinded it out and they just proved their, their worth through their work ethic, you know? And I think it was absolutely amazing and, and to see what Rhonda did.

So, so I appreciate Rhonda for, for opening up the doors, but I know that there were a lot of other female pioneers before her that had put in a lot of work. Yeah, a lot of people were paving the way before that even happened. Yeah. Yeah. We were chatting with Keith Jardine last night and we were finding it, we were all kind of agreeing that it seems like men have kind of, and MMA will always evolve and powerlifting will always evolve, bodybuilding always evolve. But what we're seeing from the women is really extraordinary. And where women were before, as opposed to where they are now, strength-wise and powerlifting,

from what I've seen, it's more and more common for women to be like deadlifting, like 500 pounds. The evolution of women in MMA, I think has changed drastically. It seems like there's more women in MMA that have been doing it from a really young age than there used to be. And, um, it's just really cool to see that level being pushed and is to see, uh, the women kind of excelling and getting a shot. Yeah. I think that if you give us a platform to shine on, then we will, like you give us a place to perform and we will you know if you know when i was a martial artist i never thought that i would be a professional fighter because there just there wasn't anybody out there to to as a role model for me to like

okay i want to be her you know i want to be this i want to be that but now there are there are little girls that are you know are five and six and they can turn on the TV on a Saturday night and watch the UFC and see females fighting and say, that's what I want to be when I grow up. And so I think that's really amazing. But, um, I think that just, um, the encouragement that, um, that the community has given females really is just kind of one of those things like, well, she can do it, I can do it. And we're seeing now that, especially in MMA, I feel like it's one of those sports that,

you know, the girls can be right alongside the guys. And I'm not saying a female fight a guy, but what I'm saying is, if you give a girl a headlining event in the UFC, she can sell it out. and I think that Dana has given those females respect and and and the notoriety to say like this girl's a badass and you know um you need to watch her um and and I'm not sure how it is in in the like the bodybuilding world and this and that but um yes men are strong but i think it's cool to see the

strength of a female and the difference of strength like i think i think females are very strong they have very good strong cores and strong legs because we have to birth children and and and survive and you know mother there is a correlation there you were talking to keith last night about that where there's a court like women have a higher percentage of body weight, like, in their lower body. So, therefore, sometimes deadlifting and squatting maybe becomes, like, a little bit more natural. They still might lift less. But what we're seeing is, like, the improvement from women is exponentially greater than what we're seeing from men, which is pretty. Like, a woman could go from deadlifting, like, 315 to close to 500 pounds in just a few in like two years but

for a guy to gain 200 pounds on their deadlift or something like that might take them eight years something like that i wonder why that is i don't know i don't know what the what the reason is but whatever the case is women are just they're tearing it up yeah i was gonna say do you think it has anything to do with the fact that females have like a higher pain tolerance. I do think that that could be a factor. I think that women, this is just a total generalization, but I think that women tend to follow the rules a little bit more. So like if I was to give you a program or if Greg is to influence you on something you should be doing, you'll probably follow it most likely. Where a guy, I think they tend to be like i they

tend to be like i got this dude like i kind of know how to do this and they're a little bit more they're not yeah they're a little harder to work with i know that that's the case in powerlifting like you'll give a female like eight exercises to do in a workout they'll get through all eight of them yeah and they'll do them to a t and a guy is like gonna go too heavy probably go too hard and then not even do all the exercises because yeah i don't like lunges so i'm not'll do them to a T. And a guy is like going to go too heavy, probably go too hard, and then not even do all the exercises. Yeah, I don't like lunges, so I'm not going to do them. And they'll just skip them. Like, ah, I can modify this.

And it's like, well, no, that's part of the program. It's maybe just because maybe some of the men, they may have had a previous, they might have preconceived notions on how they should be lifting. And maybe the women are like, I'm kind of new to this, so I'm just going to do what my coach tells me. I hear that a lot from coaches in MMA that the females are easier to coach. And it might be that, that the men, you know, they have a bigger of an ego.

Because I wouldn't say women don't have an ego, especially in fighting. It's like you kind of do have to have one in order to do what we do. We know what's best for us. Trust we do we know what's best for us trust us we know what's best for us that's the only thing i can think but uh that's what i've heard from coaches is is from even from coach jackson he will tell me all the time he he's like he's like the men are the cry babies when it comes to the sports it's like you girls like you'll be put through the ringer and you just kind of like wipe you you'll cry but you'll wipe your tears and continue to do it anyways you know what does your mom think uh now she kind of like whoops like you know she got you into like karate which is a way different sport than yeah this like you know severe combat sport

that you're involved in now my mom is the biggest fan she loves it she she's she's kind of a hardcore asian lady she's just she doesn't take no crap and she's um she's very um i don't know if you've ever met any like asian mothers but they tiger mom yeah they're just it's like a tough love type of situation and she's um always been hard on all of us you know if we got straight A's but an A minus we'd get in trouble for getting having an A minus you know if um you know like so she might always be like super affectionate type of thing yeah not not at all I'd have to force like I love you's out of her and stuff like that but she's oh you know if I've gotten beat up she'd be like next time you remember okay don't get beat up like that you look so bad right now and like

straight up like tell me like how bad i looked and i told you all the time put your hand up and you're gonna get beat up like that and that's makes it sound so simple keep your hand close to your face i wish they had divisions for for you so that you knew what it felt like right it's funny now you're a mom and at goal, your overarching goal is to be the mom champ, right? So, you know, and you want to show that to your daughter. Can you be mom and champ at the same time? Is it possible? Yes, it is possible.

Absolutely. And I'm right there. And she's, you know, my daughter is a part of the team and she's a huge reason why. She looks nothing like you. I just want to tell people all the time. I think she looks like Josh, but she is. She's a good combo of both of you. I think so.

I think she's, everybody says she's a mini me, but to me I think she looks like Josh. How old is she? She's eight. And what do you think that, you know, becoming mom champ, you know, like what is that going to show her? And is that, you know becoming mom champ well you know like what is that going to show her and is that you know that's the goal kind of absolutely hey you can do anything you want to do just just like we talked about you know ronda opening up the doors for for women

to let them know it's okay to to be outspoken and it's okay to to say what you want and this and that is what i want to do for mothers not just mothers but honestly like parents out there that think that um they have to put their dreams aside because they become parents and and it I understand the urge to want to give everything to your children because it is just like instinctive when you become a parent to want to give your children a better life than you had. But I think they learn so much more from seeing you, you know, continue to reach for your dreams. And there's a lot to be said in that aspect. You know, having children is the best thing that happened to me, but it honestly, it is an obstacle.

You know, when you're looking at it, it does make things more difficult in life. But what are you teaching your children? If, if you say, um, if you're using your children as an excuse to not go after what you want and that's, that's what it is to me. It's an excuse. Don't use it as an excuse. How important is, um and things like that, conditioning? How much stuff do you do outside of the MMA gym? And how important is that to your success in the octagon? I think it's all very important. I think it's important to have a good balance.

I know that going from 105, competing at 105, going up to 115, that was a huge thing that we had to start implementing was, um, my strength and conditioning. And so we, we ramped that up and, um, there's something to, there's something that goes into having the confidence to know that your body can, you know, be broken down and built back up, um, in, in the fight world. But yeah, I think it's all about balance. So when I'm out of fight camp, I do more strength and conditioning. When I get into fight camp, it becomes more fight oriented and we probably do strength. So now I'm doing strength and conditioning probably three to four times a week.

And when I'm in fight camp, it's probably like once or twice a week. And do you have a coach that brings you through that? I do. I do, yeah. His name is Steve, and he's been with me for a really long time. He also trains Holly. And, you know, he's just, what i love about him is that i feel like anytime there's like a new trending fad or this or that um he tries it he's like tried everything because he wants to know like it will it work does it not you know and and he's like his own guinea pig and so

and i think actually like his athletes are his guinea pigs as well because it's really smart to try everything Yeah, it's important to for the fighter psyche Like if you see somebody else doing something you might be intrigued and you'll say like kind of what's that? And he could say well, you know, I actually tried it for a few weeks and it wasn't great But if you want to try it because your mindset is a huge part of the whole yeah And yeah, it kind of like you can he can sift through What worked what didn't and kind of come to his own he can sift through what worked, what didn't, and kind of come

to his own conclusion. And then you don't have to try the things that don't work. You only try the things that he says do work. I'm sure you probably go to him all kinds

of different ideas like fasting or keto or some of these things and he's probably like, nope, let's not mess with. And he's a too, like he,

it's funny because him and his wife are complete, like complete different like body types too. And so it's funny because sometimes they'll wife are complete different body types too. And so it's funny because sometimes they'll do diets together and things that work really well for him didn't work at all for his wife. And things that worked really well for his wife, he didn't have any results at all.

I think a huge part of it is you have to kind of at least halfway like what you're doing. You know, like my brother and I, we've messed around with carnivore diet and keto diet, but we like those types of foods. And we're also not like hyperactive. We don't have an MMA schedule. We're not, you know, working on our mobility and working on all these drills and boxing and kickboxing and doing Muay Thai and clenches

and all the different things that are involved in MMA. We're just lifting some weights once a day for an hour or 90 minutes or something like that. So the energy expenditure that we have is way different. Maybe you need carbohydrates. Absolutely. Maybe you need to mess around different fuel sources. How do you usually eat?

You know what I did? I tried doing the paleo diet for a fight camp, and it was rough. it was really rough, I mean, I got my weight down, and I looked good, but I was drained, I was depleted, my body wasn't able to recover, I didn't have the energy I needed to get through a practice at 100%, and so, like you said, I really do, I realize that for me, like carbohydrates wasn't an enemy. I just had to understand the type of carbohydrates I was eating and when I needed to eat them. I think depriving yourself is important to, you know, build a lot of character

and to build a lot of willpower. But I sometimes will ask myself, like, what am I doing? Like, why am I depriving myself so much all the time? Like, for what reason? And so I like to, you know, mix in eating a donut, mix in having some wine with my wife, you know, and things like that. Are you able to still have some fun outside of, you know, the last six or eight weeks? Yeah. And I think moving, I think it's twofold.

Moving up in weight has helped me do that because I'm not so concerned about hitting a certain weight. I'm more concerned about being healthy and in training. Right. And getting max max potential, I guess, out of my training. And I think just like you said, having a more laxed understanding of my nutrition and, and, um, being healthy, you know, 80 to 90% of the time. And then when I want to, if I want a donut, if I want to eat out, then I will. And I, and I won't beat myself up about it. You know, how do you, uh, do you beat yourself up if you lose? Cause I know that that's, you know,

what's the difference for you between winning and losing? Yeah, what's harder? Losing is hard. It's, you know, I'd hate to say it's one of the reasons why we do it, but it's because of the incredible highs that we fight. But along with those incredible highs are incredible lows. that we fight, but along with those incredible highs are incredible lows, and it's, it forces you to look, look into yourself, it forces you to face your demons, and it forces you to sit with your failures, and with every loss that I've had, I've had to learn from it and and as much as I say that I hate losing because I do it's it's it's a necessary part of life and um I wouldn't have been able to grow as

much as I have or have lessons to teach my daughter if it wasn't for my failures but yes it is very hard and um you know there are times when I finish. And if we're just talking about actually just like well-being, you're beat up. Like I don't mind being beat up, broken if I win. Yeah. Like my pro debut, my UFC debut was amazing. I broke my hand in the second round. I went on to win the fight.

It didn't matter that I broke my hand because I won the fight. But being beat up and losing is just like, like just adding insult to injury, you know, and then talking about like a fighter's pay, your pay is cut in half when you lose so it's like the difference between you know you you expecting because you never go into a fight expecting to lose you know you expecting to make this much amount of money and then it's cut in half and then the trajectory of your career gets dumped you know everything gets dumped all the media that you once had stops talking to you you know all the all the sponsorships turn the other way you know it's it it really is it's kind of like uh like a very black and white world you can become irrelevant really fast which is just kind of sad because you put so much into it and you work so hard and then all of a sudden like the media they stop calling they want to talk to the person or whatever right

yeah and what i what i've taken from that is you kind of have to make your career about more than winning and losing. Like if I only fight to win, then it's going to be a really rough road, you know. So we've really kind of just changed our mindset about the whole idea of fighting. And for me, it really is a way of life, and it is a journey. And regardless of the outcome, I am growing. And so being able to kind of take that in and sit with that and be comfortable with that, and sit with that and be comfortable with that, I think has really allowed me to propel and knock out three wins in a row

and call out the champ for a belt. Because at the moment, it's like no matter what happens, I'm winning because I'm bettering myself, I'm bettering my family, and I'm forcing myself to do things that make me uncomfortable and that make me scared. Does it kind of teach you to put everything on your shoulders because like this is a an individual sport you know I'm sure you played other sports as a kid if you played softball or basketball or something like that you can easily just say well you know

the whole team kind of stinks and the other team was the other team had a couple better players than us and that's kind of why we lost or somebody didn't cover somebody on a three-pointer so that's why we lost or whatever it might be but in this case you physically you know fought against somebody with a certain set of rules and you came out the other end with the short end of the stick you know so does it kind of teach you in your day- day life like this is on me? Like she's my responsibility. Fight game is my responsibility. And it just does it do that for you? Yeah.

And that's another reason why I love fighting is because at the end of the day, there is nobody really to blame but yourself. Now, in fighting, everything has to be aligned. Right. You have to be physically ready. You have to be mentally ready, spiritually ready. Your nutrition has to be aligned, right? You have to be physically ready. You have to be mentally ready, spiritually ready. Your nutrition has to be on point. You have to be in the right arena. You have to make sure that you, you know, your immune system didn't break down this and that. And, um, and so there was just so many different variables that are, that are outside of your control.

Really what fighting has done for me is to understand that I can only stress about the things that are in my control. And, and if I've taken the correct steps to, to control those things, then I, I, you know, everything else kind of will take care of itself. How'd you meet Josh, your husband? You know, um, yeah, know, yeah, we kept running into each other. So I always tell people that it was destined to happen. So I moved out here for training, and Josh was stationed out here because he was in the military. And when we met, I didn't know that he fought.

He didn't know that I fought. And it was just funny. Actually, I was working at Hooters at the time. And it was an amazing job that I can have while I train. So I could train throughout the week and then work, you know, two double shifts on the weekend. You got good buffalo wings over there. Yes. That's where I go.

Daytona style. Those are my favorite. And it was great. But when I first moved to Albuquerque i don't know you guys how long have you guys been here just a couple days just a couple days well albuquerque is a fight town yeah we see that for sure we don't have any major sports or anything like that so it's like they're really prideful in it in in being fighters and so um everybody in albuquerque is a fighter and and you kind of you get um you get sick of it you know so it's like in la everybody's an actor exactly yeah right like

sure you're a fighter fighter exactly you're not ufc or yeah exactly like we we went to the club with george st pierre and we're trying to cut the line and we're like do you know who this guy is he's george st pierre and they're like we don't care get to the club with George St. Pierre and we're trying to cut the line. And we're like, do you know who this guy is? He's George St. Pierre. And they're like, we don't care. Get to the back of the line. Like that's how that's Albuquerque. Wow. And so him and his friends would always come to the, to the, to Hooters and, and, and grab some food. And his friends would always try to pump them up. And I'm like, yeah, sure.

He's a fighter, you know, but, um, he was actually really, really decorated fighter he so he was in the air force and he fought for the air force and um he was ranked um fifth in the nation for a really long time and uh uh and um i remember one time him it was him and his friends and they're trying to get me to go out with them and I just I wasn't interested in going out and um because I was training and I just said I kind of gave him like a a bs answer I said okay well if I ever see you downtown I promise I'll save you dance and you know I promise I'll remember your name because they were giving me such a hard time and I never saw them and I think it was like six months down the road and

he was at a like a country bar with his friends and I was there too I was DD for my friend and they called me over and he would he was just like you remember you remember you remember us and I was I was like I don't I don't remember and uh his friend was like well i'm going to colorado and um i don't have any friends there and he's like yeah we'll take my number down and i'll introduce you to some of my friends and i have the show you around town and his friend kind of like pretended like he didn't have his phone on him and and then he was like well give your number to my friend here. And it was Josh. And then Josh gave me a hard time for not remembering his name. And he said, yeah, you promised you'd save me a dance.

I said, okay. And then I remembered. Then I felt bad because I was being kind of a bitch to him. And so I gave him my number, and I told him to come find me for a dance, and so he texted me to make sure that I gave him the right number, and then he left. So he left me hanging, and we ended up going out on a date,

and we just, we ended up clicking, and we've been together ever since. Yeah, that makes a huge difference to have somebody kind of in all this with you. How does all this work? How know, how does it work with, uh, you know, trying to be a mother and trying to be a significant other and, and, and having the fight game going on all at the same time? It's hard. Um, it, uh, it takes some maneuvering. It takes some, it takes really understanding people in your circle. And luckily I have that. My husband is very supportive because he comes from a boxing background

and knows the sacrifice it takes to get where we need to go. So I think that's a huge part of it. My teammates, my coaches, they're all very supportive in our goal. And so when we first had Araya, I would bring her to the gym and I'd have my gym bag and my car seat and my diaper bag, and they'd all be there. And if she started, if she started crying, you know, coach would pick her up and then continue on with class. And we, we, we just made it work and um it really takes it takes a team and um my husband's very patient my daughter is very patient and um they just they all very very much

care about getting that gold and so um it's a team effort does everyone try to offload some of the stress they try to take take some of it away from you, like business deals and just different things that you might have to go to, or they try to just take care of as much stuff for you as they can? Yeah, absolutely. My mom comes down to help me with Araya. Araya has postponed multiple birthdays or holidays because it was during fight camp.

The coaches will work around our schedule, will, you know, let me bring Araya in. My husband has actually taken his hours down with his practice because he's a financial advisor. So he, you know, has taken down his hours so that he can be more present at practices. He can come and be a second eye when i'm hitting mitts when i'm sparring he you know he was the one coordinating all of this stuff with you so he has kind of taken a managerial part in in the career in the business and um he's the one that negotiates pay he's the one that reaches out to sponsors he's the one he's like manager publicist coach husband um therapist punching bag does that get stressful sometimes yes it does

is it was it hard for him to step away from like fighting to support you fighting or did he do that kind of naturally and easy i mean he'll say it was easy, but I know that it was hard for him. Yeah. You know, because he was really good, really good. I mean, he's one away from being in the Olympics. Was he doing boxing? Yeah, he was a boxer. Wow.

And so, yeah, I know it was hard for him to step away and because he's just like he's just as passionate about fighting as as i am i mean if not even more really i would come home some days and he'd be on the couch and he still does this now watching tape pausing rewinding starting pausing rewinding starting to the point where you know that the cd would get burnt out because he was studying tape and and that's because that's his life he loves he loves what he does you know and so i know like um we gotta make it we gotta make it worth it does he train you at all yeah like in Like in striking or something? In striking. And like I said, he's my punching bag. So you don't want to be too mean to your teammates

because you want to be able to have teammates. And so there is a certain amount of respect that you have to show. But fighting is also a brutal sport and you have to know that you can pull that animalistic side of you out and so what we've been doing a lot because he is a lot bigger than me is he'll just you know you know those i i should get him those self-defense huge like like he's gonna get bit by a canine or whatever by a canine but he literally puts the headgear on and puts on his mouth put in his mouthpiece and will let me like go to town on him throwing elbows punches and um kicks and i think a lot of wives would have to say but it's really improved it it is just kind of unlocked something in me that

I think has needed to come out in order for me to get to the next level because and I think it might be because I have a martial arts background and a lot of it is kind of just more self-defense than anything. Like, you have to show a sign of respect, and this is, you know, have good sportsmanship, and at the end of the day, you don't want to hurt this person, this and that. Hey, we're in the fight world.

It's either you or me. You know, it's something that I've had to deal with because I do really have a lot of respect for my opponent. I have a lot of respect for anybody that decides to step into the octagon. But talking to my sports therapist, and also my good friend Aubrey, who is one of my sponsors, he talks about it, and he says, you would be doing yourself and your opponent a disservice and you would basically be disrespecting them if they if you gave them anything less than what you have and so I've kind of taken that in and been like all right

well like this is what we both signed up for I'm gonna give you my all because I respect you Wow give us like a sports psychiatrist yeah I was just gonna ask that yeah like a sports therapist'm like, what is that? Yeah, sports psychiatrist. I don't know. I don't know what to call him. I call him Doc. That's very cool. I do. And we get together. We probably get together once every other week, like off camp, outside of camp. And then when camp starts, it's once a week.

And then towards the end of camp, we get together like twice a week and you know he gives me homework and and are these things that like um that sponsors pay for and stuff like that or is this is this like all expenses that are coming out of your you at the end you know because it's like that's got to be you know you have a coach for every aspect of the game and some of them are some of them sponsor me um um some of them don't yeah so but it is it it racks up and that's why i was telling you like for a while i let the pressure of everything mount of winning mount on me because i wanted to be able to provide for my family and at the at the end of the day, if I won, okay, we could do this. But if I lost and I had to pay Coach 1, Coach 2, Coach 3,

and my nutritionist, and my sports psychologist, and Araya's daycare, and Araya's school, and Araya's gymnastics, and it just adds up. Really quick. Yeah, they wouldn't be happy if you said you're getting a 50% cut because I got a 50% cut too. Exactly. Yeah. Your pay is% cut. Exactly. Yeah.

Your pay's going to be half. Yeah. So I think it does. It did add up. But when you let those things put pressure on you, then you're not able to perform. So it's kind of like double edged sword. Yeah. Like it's like, well, I mean, obviously those things will come into play. But if you, if you focus so much on all of those things where your brain only has so

much capacity to, to work. And so I, I, I can't be thinking about that stuff right now. I have to be thinking about what's in front of me, right? Not even, not even winning the fight, fight, winning this first punch. Let me land this first punch. Okay, now let me land this next punch. Let me land whatever's in front of me right now at this moment. Is it all fighting all the time or do you have other things that you like to do, hobbies or anything that you like to do outside of fighting? I love to do things outside of fighting. It can be, I think, very taxing and exhausting to be

all fighting all the time. So I like to do a lot of arson cross with my daughter. We like to go hiking here. We're really close to the mountains, so we go hiking. We're huge movie buffs, so any cartoon, any Marvel movie that comes out, we're on it. And so my daughter can tell you anything you want to know about any of the superheroes. So we love watching movies and we love traveling. Uh, we went to China for Christmas and so she got to see the great wall of China. And, um, we just came back from LA, but we took her all over. We took her to all the different beaches and we're getting ready to go to Florida.

Then we're going to take her to Calgary. I just think it's so amazing that she can see the world. Yeah, because a lot of times as kids, we didn't get to see the world when we were kids. I wish I could have, but it just wasn't an opportunity that we had. Yeah, and then you're exposed to so many different cultures. that we had. Yeah. And then you're exposed to so many different cultures. It's like when you can see with your own eyes that somebody's happy playing, you know, in the dirt street with a cardboard box, um, like making it into a house and it really puts life into a different perspective. And, and I can sit up here and tell her that all day, but when she experiences it for herself,

you know, when she's in Thailand and she has to squat to go to the bathroom instead of sit on an actual toilet but she's still having the time of her life it puts things into perspective for her you know what is uh fighting done for you we met some really awesome people yesterday and that had these uh you know all kinds of different stories were shared with us one girl lost 200 pounds and she's getting ready for her first fight Kayla yeah Kayla yeah it was more than that she said she weighed like 400 pounds almost oh yeah maybe lost almost 200 pounds yeah um just some really cool uh stories you know kind of overcoming certain things what is uh fighting maybe helped you overcome or help build everything it has given me everything that I have today. It really has.

Like I said, I grew up and I was very, like I'm a middle child and I was always kind of the peacekeeper of the family. You know, if my parents were arguing, I was trying to make them happy. If my sister wasn't getting along with my mom, I was trying to balance that out. And so if friends weren't happy I would

do whatever I could to make them happy and and for for a long time people would take advantage of me because I was always just bending over backwards for them and and fighting gave me a voice it gave me confidence it gave me a reason to stand up for myself and um you know forever be grateful about that but I think the biggest thing is just how to deal with failure how to feel like there is how to get up and continue moving when you feel like there is nothing left to do but you know be sad for yourself um like when when I got pregnant with Araya everybody talks about you know postpartum depression but I was really depressed during my pregnancy and and don't get me wrong I there was a lot of parts of pregnancy that I absolutely loved, I loved feeling her inside of me, I loved the connection that I had with her, but, you know, day in and

day out for 10 months, I sat up here and watched my teammates grow and get better and fight and win and go on to sign contracts, and then they opened up the women's division for the UFC and they you know they opened up a whole female organization um and I could do nothing but watch that all happened right when you got pregnant exactly yeah exactly good timing right great timing and I was like oh great and and it was kind of just like it was a very um it was uncharted territory. I didn't know what was going to happen after I had my daughter. Was I going to be able to afford to even continue to fight? Because fighters are broke.

It's not like a glamorous life that you live as a fighter. So you kind of have to make a decision. That's one of the reasons why Josh stopped fighting is because it's not concrete. It's not something that you can get paid every other week. You'd have somebody in the family that had a real, yeah. The only way you could make it work is if you're in UFC and if you continue to win, basically.

Exactly. And if you know, if you know how to brand yourself properly and continue to get endorsements and sponsorships, you guys are allowed to have other sponsors, but it has to be outside of like the like you could sponsor you could uh promote things via your social media and stuff like that yeah and and all of that really changed too when i got signed to the ufc because before that it was you know we relied heavily on on income based on our sponsors come fight night because they wanted you know prime locations on

our on our outfits but then the UFC decided to take over all of that and so it just changed up the game but yeah like um I didn't know how my body was going to react when I came back I didn't I got gestational diabetes when I was pregnant and and then after I had my daughter, I found out that I had thyroid issues. And so that was that, and it was just the feeling of being behind for two years and having to play catch-up. And if I was too old, if I was out of my prime, it's just like a very short-lived career anyways,

and it was just like a lot of doubt a lot of internal talk a lot of just a lot of the unknown and and um yeah i don't know how's the sports psychologist helped with some of that oh he's he's helped tremendously um he he I feel a lot of times throughout my life throughout my career I was self sabotaging and I didn't even know it and it was because I

didn't give myself like two steps forward one step back type of deal like two steps forward three steps back yeah kind of. I think every time I was ready to just break through and show the world what I was able to do, I took it away from myself because I didn't give myself permission.

I wasn't great. I wasn't on that level yet, so you don't need to be here or some of the like mental come on josh come on over here and instagram zooming in on girls butts on instagram over there look at that look at that what's going on damn it um yeah so what was i talking about we're just talking about like kind of the mindset how the sports psychologist has helped a lot so yeah i was like so because like i was the champ of invicta 105 is all-female organization and then i i can I went to defend my title. And then I was fighting this girl.

And she was an amazing fighter. But a lot of people started talking about how Invicta was just feeding me these cans, basically, so that they could promote me as a fighter. Because I really wasn't a good fighter. I was just a face for the organization. You were the pretty girl, right? Yeah. I was just a face for the organization. So they're going to give me these easy fights so I

can stay the champion. And it pissed me off and it gave me a chip on my shoulder. And I was, and so, and it was just the weirdest thing that happened because then I started building my opponent up like, no, she's good. Have you guys taken a look at her record? She's this, she's that, she's that. And he built her up to this point to where she was bigger than what she really was and then so you know i got into the fight and um i started i started doing stupid stuff in the fight and and to the point where it was just like like i said i sabotaged myself and i've done that on on more than one you give us a couple examples of how you've sabotaged, like whether it be diet or training or whatever? So like, um, cause I think we're all guilty of that by the way. Yeah. All of the above

diet. I've, I've done it where I've like, I've gotten myself to peak performance, you know, and I look amazing. I feel amazing amazing and then just because i don't have to diet anymore i go off and i go to wiener schnitzel and i get a chili cheese dog chili cheese fries chili cheese burger and a soda great idea yeah let's go right after this and like it's either all in or all out you know so that's like the same way it's horrible and i think a lot of fighters do that and then just like with with with the fight it was like in my head i was like basically saying we're just listening to what other people are saying well you don't belong here so just give her the fight you know and instead of just fighting for myself, I let everybody else decide what I was. And I gave up the belt.

You know? And it haunted me. It haunted me. Wow, that's how you lost your belt. By pushing. She, okay, so she hit me. And it was kind of like just really accurate. It wasn't hard or anything.

But she hit me in and it was kind of like just really accurate. It wasn't hard or anything, but she hit me in a place on my face where my eyes just swolled up immediately, and I couldn't see out of my eye. I was winning the fight, but I started to feel like a sense of urgency to finish the fight because I couldn't see out of my eye. So I'm like, well, I can't see, so I need to finish this fight soon or else it's gonna just only get worse and um I remember my coach telling me you're doing better on the ground so just so in in my mind instead of taking her down I did some like random kick that put me on the ground instead of so instead of being offensive

to get on the ground I I put myself in a bad position to get on the ground so I kind of already like took two steps back on the ground and then um I'm not I you know I'm not I I wouldn't say that I just gave it to her because I was, I was fighting. And if anybody knows me, they'll know that I like I'll fight to the end. And so, but I do think that I had like, like some mental blocks during the fight. Um, and she had taken, we, we hit the ground and I, and I was fighting her and she got me in a guillotine and, um, it was so fast and it happened so quickly. And I remember her getting me and me just panicking. And then I tapped and then afterwards came all of the,

ah, you should have done this, you should have done that, you should have waited, you shouldn't have done this, you should, you know, and I mean, that's a fight game for you as well too. It's like kind of, you can't, sometimes it's hard to think

when you're in there getting punched in the face. You gotta really block out the noise too. I would imagine the crowd probably even plays into it. So if you're getting hit, you might think like that punch wasn't shit. Why is the crowd, like, they're so excited about that punch. That wasn't really much of anything. But maybe it does make you panic, like you kind of said about, you know,

her getting your back and getting close to getting a choke on you. Yeah, it was, you know, in hindsight, I could have held out a little longer. In hindsight, I could have held out a little longer, but at the time, I panicked and I gave up on myself. How do we prevent this from happening again? That's what my mental coach has really helped me to do. He's helped me to, like you said, block out the outside noise. None of that really matters anyways. You know, they're not the ones in the cage with me. Those people that are criticizing me, those people that are saying all these things aren't the ones stepping into the octagon and trading punches with this other person. They're not the ones that put in

the hours before that. They're not the ones like, you know, before that they're not the ones like you know and so blocking all of that out really helps and and something that I do with him is we meet up in in public places like Starbucks or like someplace where there's a lot of noise because that's life there's there's always going to be distractions and if I can't focus in on what he's saying at Starbucks then how am I going to focus in on my opponent when there's lights and Bruce Buffer screaming in my face and the referee and the arena and the cameras and all of that stuff? Like, how am I going to focus when all of that's going on? So just understanding what's in my control and just really taking myself and being in the moment.

And the only way you can do that is really by repetition. The same way that you rep your muscles is the same way that you have to rep your mind. And it's hard to do that against an opponent that you've never fought before, so you have to imagine it. And you have to imagine it in a have to imagine in a million different ways and and the more you imagine yourself winning and the more you imagine yourself doing these things that you practice um the more it becomes a reality and i know it sounds simple

to say but it that's that's what we've been doing we've been imagining myself winning and what did it feel like the first time br Buffer yelled your name in your face? He screams it, but it must be so exciting to be in the UFC, in the octagon, Bruce Buffer screaming your name. What does that feel like? See, for a long time I blocked it out because I didn't want to get nervous. And it sucks because I kind of like missed out on those things. Like those are things that when I'm done fighting that I'm going to miss and that I should probably embrace and allow to happen.

And so that's another one of the things that, you know, my sports psychologist talks to me about, cause I would say, well, I'm blocked this out and I blocked that out. And he's like, why isn't that like one of the reasons why you got into it so that you can fight on this main stage? Like, don't block that out. Like let it in, like let it in and let it feel you, you know? And so now does it give you energy when you, you know, when you get in there and they're like, you know, pumps you up kind of. Yeah. So like So like let it in let it feel you and think that and that that goes with anything in life, you know, so and Talk it about like Talk about any type of obstacle or anything that comes your way that that might get in the way of your of your final goal as like as a weight or

You know a baggage and and you can let that and you can take the baggage and you can put it on your shoulders and you can continue on your journey but it will get heavier and heavier and then another thing comes and you can put it on your shoulders and it'll get heavier or you can use that baggage to your advantage and say okay well that's my journey how about I use this as a step and take that baggage and stack your baggage so that you can climb those steps towards your goal. And, um, I think that's what I've done. I've taken all these obstacles and all of these things that I used to view as negative emotion, and I've used it and I've turned it into positive emotion so that it gives me feel to,

to help me towards my goal of becoming the champ. You said a kind of a key word there. I think obstacle, you know, if you think about if you have the right tools, you can get over an obstacle. You think of like an obstacle course, you got the right skill set, you can get over just about anything. Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. And, um, it really is, it's crazy to think that for for a while i was fighting you know with a sense of urgency and a sense of fear and i i and i i transfer my fear the fear of losing the fear of losing financially the fear of not being able to provide, the fear of failure, the fear of embarrassment. And I transferred all of that into excitement and the excitement of learning and the excitement of winning

and the excitement of getting to do what I love and what millions of people wish they could do. And I'm doing it. So I better take advantage of it. Isn't it weird sometimes if you win that you might not feel great a few days afterwards? And like, how do you deal with that?

Cause that's, you're probably like, I won. I don't know why I'm like not pumped. Yeah. Cause you're just thinking about the next fight, I guess. Right.

I think that is crazy how that happens. It's because we make this goal, we pump up this goal so big to where it's like, all right, well like that's the end game. I think once I get that goal, I'm going to feel like I'm on cloud nine. I'm going to be a lot happier with myself and with everything else. Exactly.

And you're like, that's what, that's where I have to get to, to be happy. And then you get there and you realize like, I, I'm the same person. Like nothing's changed.

Yeah. Nothing's changed. And I changed and I there's definitely something to be said about that I think that it makes you realize what what we really do all of this for is is for the days at the gym when you're grinding it it's for you know for coming home and and being exhausted and and and laughing at yourself because you got punched in the face. Just the fact that you said you could, I think, is the part to be prideful of. I like that there's levels to it, though.

Even if you get to be a UFC champion, then it's like nobody wants to win the belt and lose it the next day. They want to win the belt, and they want to build a legacy. maybe now the hard work really starts you know even for guys like john jones there's always something new there's always some you know they're building yes it's like they're gonna always want more they're never gonna be like oh i won i'm good cool see you later you know and i think that's the characteristic of a champion

that's a characteristic of somebody that is, you know, relentless, somebody that will transcend the game. And not everybody has that. But if you do, I think that's what makes you a champion is the fact that you are continuously striving for better, no matter what level that you've reached. And you're always hungry, like you're always like you're always needing to feel that that fire and and search for the next big thing yeah there's something awe-inspiring about being around uh these champions and these you know people are awesome like he said we went to dinner with keith jardine and all i could think about is like this guy knocked out chuck liddell he's like he's like the first guy to beat him like how cool is that like i just kept couldn't stop thinking about how uh how awesome that was and how cool that was yeah it is really cool i think it's and that's what i i hope ray understands like she um you

know she's grown up in a world quite different from a lot of other kids you know and so she's grown up in the gym and so she like seeing john jones and holly holmes spar on a daily basis is is not normal but to her it is yeah and so i hope that by making this her normal that her expectations for herself and her own goals are like through the roof you know what do you what do you want for her like what do you uh do you, what do you want for her? Like, what do you, uh, do you, you know, do you want her to get into fighting or do you, or do you just want her to be, you know, happy little girl? I want her to be happy. Um, I do want her to have drive. I want her to have hunger. And sometimes I worry that we give her so much that she will miss out on that drive and hunger. So some, I mean, Josh and I talk about this about this like how do we make her struggle like what

do we have to do you know so that because i feel like that's probably one of the only ways you can grow i think if she finds something that she really likes then that'll help so if she likes like art somebody's gonna it won't come from you guys but somebody else will tell her that she sucks that's not good enough and that'll you know that'll drive her just like it did with you. She does gymnastics. Yeah. She's hit, she's hit a couple of bumps in gymnastics. I think that hopefully will give her some, some challenges.

Yeah. Like, Hey, I can't do this pommel horse or whatever. Okay. Now I can or whatever. Right. So it's like, she's got to build the skills. Yeah. Yeah, for sure.

And I think that's a hard thing as a parent is to kind of like watch your children struggle and I think that's like as a society something that we've taken away from our children that we probably shouldn't have I'm way too soft as a parent see totally honest like don't you feel like well I want to like uh yeah I want to be like good role model and stuff to my kids but like I I do want to be their friend. You know, I do, I do want them to know that I like how much I love them and how much I love being around them and stuff. And so I have a tendency to, to do too much, to give them too much. And so does my wife. And therefore, you know, we argue with my son every night about like his homework and stuff and having like drive and stuff, which he, he already has plenty of it.

It's just, he doesn't, just doesn't care about school that much yeah but uh giving kids too much can oftentimes be maybe not just as bad but it can it can be uh maybe close to being as bad as neglect because neglect can drive somebody you know you hear all these stories all the time shaquille o'neal his dad you know walked out on him and he's like, you're going to know my name at some point. I'm going to make you know who I am. You can't resist that I'm your son type of thing. And there's how many athletes have that same story. Not only athletes.

Any successful person will tell you the struggle that they went through. That seems to be the best way to be a parent, just to split on them. I'm just going to drop you off down there my mom dropped me off at this mma gym when i was eight years old i don't know what happened yeah well that's that's our figure that's our fear is that we are too soft on her because we want her to have the world you know i talked you know ct fletcher ct fletcher is in the fitness industry and he's been on Joe Rogan's show you know he was abused as a child and stuff like that and I asked him you know on the podcast I'm like because he talked about like bringing his kids like ice cream and stuff and I was like yeah how do you balance that out because you've become very successful through going through a lot of crap you know and? And he was like, Hey, I'd much rather give him ice cream and give him a right hand. And I was just like, that's, that is, you know, you can't love somebody too much. I don't think. I don't think so either, but I think it's kind of

like, it goes back to what you're saying is everybody will, will experience struggle, but what type of struggle they experience is, is what's going to determine, you know, and how they deal with that struggle. So because just because she's not struggling, um, with, you know, our parenting skills or,

you know, where, where she's going to sleep at night doesn't mean that she doesn't, won't struggle. And so that's what we hope to give her is, is struggle. It might be through gymnastics. It might be through like academically,

but hopefully it's enough to, to build her character. Yeah. And hopefully she kind of recognizes what you're doing and the other people around you are doing and uh the hard thing is to kind of split that line though between like love and discipline like because you love your child you do want to instill some discipline but at the same time you don't want to be like a drill sergeant right yeah i think we do a pretty good job like with about do you have kids have kids? I have no kids. The fact that you guys communicate about it, that's huge. The fact that, I mean, you guys probably talk about it almost on a daily basis, right? So with you and your wife, are you like,

is there a balance? Like somebody is more hard on the, than the other. And then. Yeah. My wife is, yeah. My wife's up there, but all the time. So you feel like obligated to be the good guy? Yeah, my wife's up there, but all the time. So you feel like obligated to be the good guy? Pretty much. Yeah, my my wife, you know, her dad passed away when she was 10. And she just think she just kind of, I guess, took it upon her mom was pretty hard to. But she just took it upon herself just to take everything on her own shoulders. She was like, you know, I'm just going to figure out everything to so I don't burden my mother.

And so she ended up being like almost a second parent in some way. And then also she got like a Division One scholarship in swimming and stuff just so her mom wasn't burdened with. How am I going to get my kids to college? You know, we don't have the same income that we had before and that kind of thing. Yeah. And it's crazy because at 10, you know, she made that decision. Yeah. To do that. And I wonder.

Yeah, she's different. That's for sure. I wonder if sometimes it's just who you are. Right. You know, or the environment. I think it's a combination probably. Yeah. A little bit of both.

She's just like, she's definitely a lot different than me. Like, I like motivation. I like to, I like to talk to people like yourself. I get inspired and motivated by, uh, being around other people and seeing different things. She doesn't need any of that. She's just like, she just has this like internal drive. I'm always like looking at her like you're like a robot or something or an alien or something. You're from like another planet.

You know how she is. She's like ultimate like taskmaster somehow. I think a lot of moms are though too she can get anything done like she's part of the pta she runs the business like we started another business together and uh she runs that and like she just runs she's able to like 24 7 yeah and that's like what i love about moms i feel like a lot of moms do that. They take on a lot of things. And it goes unnoticed because they don't care. They just want to get it done. It's kind of like the duty as a mom is to get it done.

And so it goes unnoticed, but I don't think it should. I think people should really sit down and see what these amazing women are accomplishing and and appreciate i saw the mom setting up like tables and food and stuff for the kids uh my kids school one day and they came out like a SWAT team they like minivan after minivan you know parked and they all came out like in a line and they all they all had their own tables and chairs and they all brought their own food and i was like holy crap playing around i. And I was like, holy crap. They're not playing around. I'm like, I'm not getting in the way of anything.

You're not going to see the dads doing that. Yeah. If it was up to the dads, it would be like paper plates, barbecue. Yeah. You bring your own drink. Yeah.

Yeah. Pick up something from a supermarket. No, you don't cook anything. I don't think that way of taking care of people like that. Yeah. I think that men honestly do have a little bit more trouble with a lot more tasks. I think that women seem to be able to handle doing more things in a given day.

I know for me, like, you give me two or three things and I'm like, I'm toast. Yeah. I got my workout. I got a little bit of business stuff to do and then some stuff with the kids and then I'm tired. Yeah. You're done for the day. Yeah. Yeah.

But mom's like, my wife is like doing laundry and dishes and cooking and just adding everything to her own plate. Yeah, and I think that's amazing. And I think, I'm glad that you see that and that you're, it's, I don't know, I think it's something to be proud of, to have a wife that does that, to have a mother that does that, to have, to have a mother that does

that, to have somebody in, you know, in the household that holds it down that way. You know, when you were mentioning sparring earlier, um, does he ever give it back to you a little bit? He has, um, but he, he, you know, he, I don't think he wants to like deflate my confidence, but yeah, he doesn't want you to move and get a good workout, right? Yeah, he will get me back in other ways. So it's like, you know, and I don't think he ever gets like mad if I catch him with a good one. He actually like smiles and laughs if I catch him with a good one because he's like proud of me. But yeah, like, well, that was a good one.

Hold on a second. How hard does she hit? She hits real hard. That's what I've told her. She still doesn't know how hard she hits. She's going to surprise some people. There you go. That was Josh.

Pumping me up. But he gets mad when I don't listen to him. And it's hard because he's my husband, you know, and he'll tell me to do something. And I'm like, really? And it's hard because he's my husband, you know, and he'll tell me to do something. And I'm like, really? And it's something that I'm really forcing myself to do because I know that, you know, he has my best interest at hand. So if he if he's mad at me about that, then he'll make me like do sprints on the treadmill or he'll make me go extra minutes in the sparring session or he'll like, he gets back at me in other ways.

But when he, so I have this relationship with my brother, like I taught him how to lift when we were younger. He became a guru in powerlifting. He's far exceeded anything I've ever done in the sport. And, but now when he tells me to do something, like I have just a different respect for him. Like, because he's my brother, we're blood. You know, it's like, if he tells me to do something something I do it and I do it to the max because I don't

want to let him down a lot of times I have injuries I'm working around and other things hurt but do you find it like like more or less motivating if it comes from your husband I guess I would I'm going to take that from you and I'm going to take that from you, and I'm going to use that going forward. Because I do, I respect him. And I think it's just hard because it's a wife-husband relationship. Plus, you're an elite athlete. Elite athletes sometimes are like, I know what's best for me. I'm going to do it this way a little bit, right?

Well, I understand to check my ego. If I think I know everything, then i'm on the wrong path like because you're always going to be learning but for him and i think it's just more of an emotional like block where if he tells me something it makes me feel like he like i'm not because he he's always like singing my praises so when he tells me i'm doing something wrong it like hurts my feelings and i'm like oh, I'm not doing it right. You know, like, and so my wife will have to pause me sometimes and tell me that she's a girl sometimes. Yeah.

And like, hey, like, you know, it might be a little different between brothers. I'm like, oh, shit. Like, you know, we're just talking business or something. I'm wondering why something didn't get done. And I'm not trying to. Yeah. You're not trying to be a savage. Yeah.

Yeah. Hurt your feelings a savage. Yeah. You're not trying to hurt her feelings or anything. Yeah. And I think that's like a huge, a huge thing that Josh and I have been able to kind of work through and kind of navigate through is, is this, you know, this goal that we're all on, it is a family goal, you know, fighting is selfish, but it's, it's, it doesn't't I can't get there myself I need him I need my my daughter I need all you know everybody so I need to show them that respect and it's it's

it's hard to navigate through all of that and to to know when to talk to him like he's my husband and to talk and then talk to him when he's like coach. But I do think I should take that from you and want to impress him and want to show him. And it is the truth. There are times when I'm fighting and when I'm like doing my visualizations and seeing myself get the belt and, and seeing myself give it to him because he sacrificed so much. Like he gave up his career so that I could pursue mine.

And I need to, I need to understand that in times when we, there is friction, you know, but, um, yeah, like it is, it's a family thing and we're going to get the belt together. It's beautiful. Like what you guys have is really beautiful. It's really impressive. It's really awesome. You guys are watching a fight. You're sitting over here on the couch and you're watching UFC on a Saturday night and you guys see a hole.

Do you guys see something go down? Do you guys stand up and say, hey, like that was pretty sick. Like, hey, he's like, like hey I think it looks like this do you guys do that kind of stuff yeah he does he'll like did you see that babe I'm like what

see what I'm over here trying to cook casseroles and he's like he's paused it and like rewinds and he's like babe come over here come watch this

like let's do that and then we'll like get up we'll even do it in restaurants like hold on what do you mean because a lot of times you guys got to record that for social media

start grappling no no no no not that way i saw this couple fighting at a restaurant yeah that's super cool you know i have to sometimes life can get ahead of me and i don't realize how cool it is to have you know a spouse that is in this like is as passionate about what i do as as i am and and to be able to kind of, like, solve this puzzle together, I think that's really cool. Kind of last question and wrapping everything up. What's something that you would like everybody to know about the gym that you train at?

Because we found it to be unique. We found it to be special. What's something that maybe the outside world doesn't know about Jackson Winks? I mean, i hope everybody knows how special it is and i i i don't think you really realize the magnitude of of the gem that it is until you've actually been there it isn't anything special like like cosmetically like you go in and it is a very nice gym we have two cages we have the mats and

but you still get that that old school smelly it smells just enough it smells just enough like not too bad but just enough to know what that is foul enough to make you leave my mom would say different but it's just enough to know that there's hard work being put in there um Jackson Wink has has changed the lives of of countless people and and you go there and um I guess I sometimes you don't even realize that that's what you needed but it is um it has changed my life it gave me a home when I when I didn't have a place to stay. I stayed in the dorms for four months so I could get on my feet. What was that like?

It was crazy, because it wasn't these dorms that were there now. It was the old gym, and the dorms was basically like upstairs attic, and I slept in the top bunk next to the refrigerator for four months and just trained every day and trained every day trained every day saved up my money so I could get an apartment and and um I proved myself really it was kind of like a initiation from when you got your own apartment was it actually harder or was it did it make it

easier to have your own place and do it? Like, because I know sometimes like living it is sometimes like, well, I'm stuck here. Yeah. I think it was living. It was a good transition for me. I don't think it's someplace that you should be for longer than a year. It wasn't for, it wasn't like for you full time, but it definitely taught you something. Oh, absolutely. And I wouldn't have any other way. You know, I would wake up to the sound of, of the sparring bell and, and people hitting mitts, you know, and just, and I was like, wow, like this is my university and I loved it. And, but, um, I needed, you know, you grow and you evolve and I needed a place of my own and I needed to be responsible for myself. And so I did.

But, yeah, when I got pregnant, I didn't know if I would continue to fight. And it was, you know, Coach Wink and Coach Jackson that said, Peanut, you're 25 years old. You have your whole life ahead of you and you will become champion. Have your baby. It's amazing to have children and, and then come back. We'll be here for you. What an amazing attitude to have. I know a lot of coaches probably be like, what are you doing? Yeah. Yeah. It was like 25, you know, it was like just barely getting ready to like break in. And, and I, you know, my record was good. I was just coming off of a good win.

Then I did the show Bully Beatdown. I was just like, oh, this is going to launch me. Then I got pregnant. I was a wreck. At that time, first of all, it was taboo for a female to be a professional fighter. Then double taboo for a female to have a baby and then come back from fighting to fight. And so for them to just kind of say, like, we got your back. And they're not about, they don't talk. They're not about, like, talking.

They're about just doing. You show up and you grind. And you grind with these people grind and um and you grind with these people next to you and they become your family yeah i don't think you could find two more hardcore guys than uh greg jackson and mike winklejohn they were so they were so cool to talk to yeah they are opposite but they were they were great to talk to yeah what's uh something that you maybe have learned from Holly Holmes and Bones Jones, you know, just from being around them for a while?

You mentioned kind of you're going to take what he mentioned earlier, some things that you had some take-homes from them that you have implemented into your training or into your life. Well, Holly has become like one of my best friends, and I really look up to her and admire her for the person she is both in and outside of the octagon. She just is the best example of a human being that there could be. She and she does it for herself. She does it because she loves it.

She does it because it makes her happy. And she really is like any time I didn't feel like doing something anytime I was trying to justify why I shouldn't go into the gym or why this and that and I just said what would Holly do and it would make me go to the gym because Holly would never never makes excuses she's always taking responsibility for her actions I mean I've seen her get knocked out pretty badly to where it was scary and um go into the locker room wipe her tears and then and then go into the press conference and congratulate her opponent. And then after that, you know, going home and being hurt so bad that she was, like, throwing up all night,

but still coming into the gym on Monday to train. Like, that, to me, is a champion. And I look up to her tremendously because she's just, she's never, ever been a judgmental person. She comes to the gym and she is a leader through example. Yeah, we saw her yesterday. She was just all about work.

She got there, just boom, started working right away. She's a leader through example. She saw us with the camera and she went, pew. She's like, nope. She hates it. She's like, oh, whatever.

She's like, I'm here to trade. She told us and we're not trying to, you know. Yeah, I mean, she's like nope she hates it she's like oh whatever she's like i'm here to train told us and we don't have it we're not trying to you know yeah i mean she i wouldn't say she hates it but like when she's like in the grind she's like in the ground she's here she's here to train and like that's but she's a she's an amazing person she loves to talk she'll tell stories and but just like in the right setting you know so yeah and with john i think what i've learned from him is just his absolute confidence in himself is like through the roof and um and that's what it takes to be champion is to have that concrete deep down in your soul confidence to know that you are the greatest and i i see it i feel, you know, like oozing through his, you know, pores, like in his walk even, right. Like even just like, I see him on Instagram

to sometimes like dancing around or messing around. And you know, you're thinking like all the other people are posting these like hardcore training things and he's like kind of messing around, making it look easy almost. Oh yeah yeah. It's crazy. And but in his like he's so confident that and that's what allows him to be creative and to to try things that normal people wouldn't try. Because he's like, oh, yeah, this will work. Let me just hit you with my elbow like it's a jab or, you know, oh, let me do a chicken wing and break your arm. And and other people would never think of that. But he does. and wing and break your arm and and other people would never think of that but he does and he just is so and he actually is really good at um focus like he you know a million things can

be going on at once but in in the gym and he could just be on the bag doing a job for an hour and and nothing will break his concentration. Awesome. Thank you so much for your time. Where can people find you? I know you got like a million followers on Instagram. It's KarateHottyMMA. And yeah, hopefully we'll have some good news for everybody here soon.

I hope so. Yeah. Yeah. Congratulations on everything. Do you have a fight coming up? I don't. We're asking for the belt. So that's what we want next. And we're going to stand our ground and wait for it.

Let them give it to us. Hell yeah. All right. That's all the time we got. Strength is never a weakness. Weakness is never strength. Later.