Mark Bell's Power Project - Power Project EP. 131 - Jeremy Avilla

Episode Date: October 24, 2018

Jeremy Avilla is the lightest powerlifter ever to total 2100 lbs and trains at Combat Sports Academy with Jesse Burdick. He struggled with drug addiction in the past and even died multiple times, but doctors were able to bring him back to life. He found purpose in training, and has since gotten stronger in every aspect of life. Find Jeremy on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/jeremyavilla/ Rewatch this episode's live stream here: https://youtu.be/-usBl3HZAoA ➢SHOP NOW: https://markbellslingshot.com/ Enter Discount code, "POWERPROJECT" at checkout and receive 15% off all Sling Shots ➢Subscribe Rate & Review on iTunes at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/mark-bells-power-project/id1341346059?mt=2 ➢Listen on Stitcher Here: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/mark-bells-power-project?refid=stpr ➢Listen on Google Play here: https://play.google.com/music/m/Izf6a3gudzyn66kf364qx34cctq?t=Mark_Bells_Power_Project ➢Listen on SoundCloud Here: https://soundcloud.com/markbellspowerproject FOLLOW Mark Bell ➢ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marksmellybell ➢ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkBellSuperTraining ➢ Twitter: https://twitter.com/marksmellybell ➢ Snapchat: marksmellybell Follow The Power Project Podcast ➢ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/MarkBellsPowerProject Podcast Produced by Andrew Zaragoza ➢ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamandrewz

All right. I just put us live on Instagram for a little bit, too. There you go. Okay. I know that Instagram life make you nervous. Let's see. How do I get Jeremy in there? Whoa.

What was that? What? What was that noise? That was his fanny pack. It was pretty loud. Let's see. There we go. That's not very good.

Well, let's see. There we go. That's got him and a little bit of me. There we go. That's good enough. We Well, let's see. There we go. That's got him and a little bit of me. There we go. That's good enough. We're good. I don't know. I don't know what I'm doing. Anyway, we're here today with Jeremy Avila. Is that how we say your name? Yeah, you actually got it right. Avila. A lot of people like to do the via, but nah, it's Avila. Avila. What is that? Portuguese. Oh. Yeah.

My dad was half port, so I'm a quarter Portuguese, I think. You're a mix. I'm a quarter port. A porterhouse. Yeah. Porterhouse steak. Oh my God. All beef, baby.

Dude, why are you here today? Well, I need a job. I was figuring I'd take one of those offices in there. I've seen everyone else has a job here, and they seem to be pretty happy. I thought maybe I could be the snack coordinator. It looks kind of complicated, and you actually exploded some of our snacks in there. I was going to say, you're not doing really good as far as a snack coordinator, because it's all over the floor. I feel attacked, because those snacks exploded.

I mean, nobody could keep those snacks together. Now, hold on a second. Maybe he's trying to provide more work for other people because if he's getting crumbs on the ground, I mean, somebody's got to clean the joint up. So you might be trying to. Well, you know what? I actually used to be a janitor. Oh.

Yeah. I worked at this really nice Ivy League school. I'd go in there, solve some math equations, you know, when I was bored and go hang out with my best friend, Ben Affleck, after. Was that in between you deadlifting nearly 900 pounds and working at the mall selling jeans? Correct. Correct. Yeah, that's right.

Got a lot of time on your hands somehow. Yeah, you know, I make use of my time. So this guy that's standing next to me today, Jeremy, he's been lifting with Jesse Megamind Burdick for a long time. Jesse Burdick has one of the largest heads in human history. It's true. One of the heaviest heads in human history. And Jeremy is somebody that came to Jesse with a good amount of talent. He was strong, explosive right off the bat i actually went up

and lifted uh with you shared the platform with you one day where it was me jesse you and chris and yep and uh we also had um uh kyle kingsbury was in the mix as well and i remember we were deadlifting against some bands and i was like okay i know that jeremy's strong but you added in competition and stuff you didn't pull anything that crazy yet things have not got gotten to be that nuts at that point um i want to say maybe you were like in the sevens still so i was like i still got some pretty good strength i want to just kind of see like if i can you know hang with them a little bit on something and so we pull three plates and then four plates we had a pretty good amount of band tension on there. And, uh, you were like, just kind of all over the place with your form.

Like you were lifting one lift was good. And what next one was shitty. And, and I was like, oh, okay. Like maybe I can, that's kind of, maybe I, maybe I could figure out a way to kind of hang in there being the seasoned veteran that I am. I was like, I could figure this out. I think I could, I think I could get them, you know? and then we got to like five plates and five plates got to be pretty hard for me and i think i did it for like two reps and it was just slow grindy rounded getting ugly quick

um and i was like yeah that was pretty good i mean it's there's a lot of band tension on there and then jeremy comes over and i was like, oh, uh, well, uh, I wasn't really trying yet. So, so let me, let me try that again. And I didn't get any better. Of course he kicked my ass that day. And, uh, but that was the first time I noticed how explosive you were on a sumo deadlift. And it's really rare for someone to have that type of explosiveness on a sumo deadlift. Um, being around the other lifters that you're around

and seeing the way jesse coaches people is this is something that you just had like did you just have this or is this from speed training did you play basketball or like did you do some other explosive sport or do you you know what what is it from do you think um i'm not really sure i've always been pretty explosive athlete i guess guess. Uh, I was able to jump really high, you know, when I was younger and, you know, I only played football through high school, but it was always pretty fast and I could always, I could always jump really well. I could always compete for the ball in there and things like that. So I guess that's the only thing I can really look back to. Dunk a basketball, shit like that? Yeah, I can dunk a basketball.

Um, um, I gotta get like a nice run and start that you know i can't like dribble dribble right but i can get up there um a lot of the growth a lot of the training we did like early on was just jumping sprint work and things like that going through football so maybe that had something to do with it but maybe just you know something i was had all along. What about other people in your family? Does anybody else have this? Like, you know? No, no. Yeah. I'm a, I'm like the only one. I mean, you recognize how different it is, right?

Like when I lift three plates or Jesse lifts three plates versus you lifting three plates. Yeah, I definitely, that was something I noticed early on is having speed. And I didn't really, when I first started started lifting i didn't really have awareness of like anything around me i just was like with two other dudes and they're like yeah that's pretty fast and i was like whatever like no right all right i didn't think it was too big of a deal you know did you like learn about speed training and stuff like that too and then you just thought well shit i should just always go as fast as i can or i kind of i don't know or you just went your own way i just always tried to pull it

as fast as i could i've always the same way with the squad and you know and all the lifts i just try to move the way as quickly as i possibly can now jesse's had to kind of slow you down though too right because uh that was leading to a lot of injury like you would um you're almost like a car in a way like if you put too big of an engine in certain types of vehicles they'll freaking blow apart because the actual frame of the car can't handle it yeah the way i was training before i was with jesse i was getting kind of banged up pretty consistently and he kind of showed me the deadlift heavy less and that's probably been the best thing i've ever done for my deadlift at least is the deadlift heavy less so and yeah you were just uh like deadlift happy yeah i mean i was just you know i loved it it was it was fun you know so you know i was deadlifting pretty heavy

like twice a week and squatting pretty heavy like twice a week that was what i was doing before i was with jesse um and i hit a wall for a while there and my favorite part of the program with jesse is probably the dynamic work that's been i think that's been the most helpful for me just be able to like set up on the bar 10 15 times and get that first rep perfect yeah that's something that a lot of people uh maybe don't have a good understanding of when it comes to power lifting so like if you were to, so three sets of 10 and 10 sets of three are virtually the same thing in some ways, uh, where they're extremely different though, is that with, uh, three sets of 10, it's kind of hard to work on the form and technique that you would use as a power lifter. Because once you get to like rep number five and rep number six and stuff, fatigue

starts to settle in. And a lot of times fatigue can actually help you perform better. Fatigue can help you tighten up your form on certain lifts, but really to refine that top end strength, you have to do singles, doubles, and triples very often. So 10 sets of three with a kind of short rest periods, you still get fatigued. Uh, you still have to kind of battle through it, but the weights are light enough to where the form could be really crisp every single time. Is that what you guys worked on,

worked on trying to keep it perfect? Yeah. Just, uh, when I first got the Jesse, I was yanking the bar off the ground a little too much. Uh,

not really, not really. I like to yank it. I like to yank it, you know, just yanking that bar all day long. And then Jesse had to, you know, put me on time out.

Do you yank it in your sleep sometimes? Because I've been, I don't know. In my sleep? Yeah. Sometimes I don't even know when I'm yanking it. I'll wake up. I mean, I'll just. Like a monkey.

Yeah, like a monkey. It just kind of goes, it just defaults there sometimes, you know. It's weird. Can't keep your hands off yourself. Well, you're a handsome guy. I mean, it makes sense. So what's your, what's your body weight at, and what did you total last meet? Last meet totaled 21, 27, and I weighed in at 217 and a half or something like that.

And, yeah, I was probably training around like 226 to 7 for most of that. And then for the squat, you're wearing like what, three layers, four layers of gear. Yeah, of course. And I got my briefs on double ply underneath that. I can't believe I got it past them, you know, I mean, hopefully I can pull it off again. It's amazing that you're lifting those kinds of weights. I mean, that's just a knee wraps, correct? 804 squat. Yeah. And the knee wraps classic raw. So 804 squat. I mean, that's, it's, you know, when somebody looks at you, you don't have a lot of like, uh, you don't have any body fat, really. You're very lean. And, uh, you know, you don't look like a typical, typical 800 pound squatter has huge quads and a big old stomach.

You don't have either one of them. You have some meaty legs on you. You got some, you got muscle mass for sure. And you got tremendous amount of muscle through your abdomen and through your back and everything. Um, and I am hitting on you. You got some, you got muscle mass for sure. And you got tremendous amount of muscle through your abdomen and through your back and everything. Um, and I am hitting on you. So that's, that's just the way it is around here. But you know, you don't typically see that. Um, what do you think has led to this

progression of your squat? Well, the squat was killing me for the last couple of meets, uh, tore my ham tore my hamstring two years in a row at record breakers. I wonder if it's those knee wraps. I mean, those are some supreme, superior knee wraps. Those were excellent.

I think that was my first meet using those knee wraps. You might be onto something there. See? Yeah. Yeah. But my squat used to be a lot wider and I think I was, you know, me and Jesse kind of decided,

you know, maybe we were asking too much of my backside there. My hand is, and I think my quads are just not as strong. And maybe because you pull sumo, maybe it's like just you're doubling down on the hips, right? Exactly. So being able to bring my squat in a little closer allowed me to actually train both lifts more often and then like that I, that I want without getting so banged up so quick. And that was, that was a huge thing. We spent like a few months straight just where all the accessory work was really geared toward just building up my quads and bringing my stance in, you know, just kind of a lot of close stance, high bar, safety bar, all that stuff. Just kind

of getting me to squat a little bit more upright and close together. What do you, you know, there's a lot of people that, um, and by the way, those of you watching on Instagram here, you should switch over to watching us on YouTube Live or on Facebook where you can hear us a lot better because you're only getting the microphone from the phone here. But I just wanted to share a little bit of this so you guys are aware of who the hell Jeremy is

because I think everybody should know who this guy is. He's a beast. But, and we're going to get to some amazing stories from Jeremy in a minute minute but we're just talking straight up lifting right now so you guys follow the conjugate system uh that's what uh jesse burdick is a believer in and like what do you think about a lot of lifters they get really kind of nervous uh if they're not doing the main if they're not doing the exact lift that they're asked to do in competition they kind of freak out out. They're like, I don't know, like safety squat bar. Yeah, that's cool. But I can't do the safety squat bar because I got a

squat. I got to do the regular bar. What have you kind of learned from doing the conjugate system and mixing things up a little bit? Well, for me, it's having all these different exercises. It's really given us a lot of tools to, like I just said, we, my squat was out too wide. We needed to bring it in because I kept getting hurt. I think I feel like I hit a wall there and the way we did that was using these different, uh, different bars and different movements and things like that so that I could actually, whenever you've tried to, whenever you try to change something about your lift, I think like, you know, if you've been lifting for a while, you probably know when you make the

change at first, it doesn't feel as good. Right. A lot of times. Yeah. A lot of times you're not lifting as much. Yeah. And know when you make the change at first, it doesn't feel as good. You're weaker. A lot of times, yeah. A lot of times you're not lifting as much. And it's hard to stick with that when that happens. But, you know, doing all the different bars and stuff like that made it easy to kind of stick with it for the months and months. And then, you know, finally.

It's a pretty good bulge as we're watching you do these deadlifts in that singlet. I got to admit, I don't know if that's, is that two pairs of socks down the front or just one? Just one. Just one with the one. And then I threw in a little pack of Rolaids in there. Okay. That's the secret. Just kind of whatever you had in your bag.

Yeah, there's a nice silhouette there. I used to go with a knee wrap, but that still didn't work. Yeah. It can. Wow, those lifts are freaking easy. Is it a hard thing? Is it hard to deal with like it seems like it seems like jesse is almost like a um like an uncle or like a father figure that's always right is that kind of hard to deal with sometimes where where you're like oh fuck jesse i'm gonna

try this or i'm gonna do something not that you want to like do something different than him but maybe sometimes you just want to kind of go for it and you don't want to lift 80%. And, and you do. And then, and then there goes your hamstring or your groin or whatever. It's kind of hard. Is that kind of hard to deal with sometimes being like, damn it? Yeah. So there's, I mean, just through experience like that, Jesse's right.

Most like all the time. So, and my ideas usually aren't so great, but you know what? God bless Jesse. He still lets me kind of go with some ideas sometimes just to remind me like, oh yeah, your ideas still suck. You're, you're the kind of person that like everybody needs to be very careful with, right? You need to put a helmet on you and make sure, right.

Give you very specific instructions and make sure you're wearing your mouthpiece. So you don't drool all over the place and things like that, right? I need a little supervision. Probably a little more than others. And like everybody gathers around like, okay, Jeremy, he's like part of the team, but like not really. So make him feel comfortable and everybody try to help him get through the workout, okay? Ready, break.

Ready, break. Yeah, it's a little like that. You like to, uh, you like to get after it though. You like to go nuts here and there. So was that something that was, uh, kind of hard to pull back on? Yeah. But you know, just seeing the results makes it worth it. And you just, I just try to find ways to change gears. Uh, um, I've learned to really enjoy the, the dynamic days again, you know, just seeing how fast I can pull this weight or, you know, just knowing, you know, working on this little part of my deadlift, you know, just kind of rather than just, you know, on the max effort days, it's kind of like you have like a different mindset.

Right. Which is, you know, those are the fun days. But I've kind of just learned to really love the accessory work and the dynamic days, you know, just kind of get. Is it, I know, I know a lot about your past and we'll dive into that in a minute. to really love the the accessory work and the uh dynamic days you know just kind of is it uh i know i know a lot about your past and we'll dive into that in a minute is it hard for you to be consistent definitely i mean getting yeah i mean powerlifting's been the thing i've probably been most consistent i mean it's been the thing i've done most consistently in my entire life

so that's definitely helped me to that's grown outside of powerlifting, you know, not, not really like to work anymore. You know, I'm a little bit more reliable. It's, it's helped bleed out a little bit there, you know, with, uh, with that being said, do you think that that was the biggest difference with this competition versus others was obviously like you're, you're healthy. So of course that's a huge part of it, but maybe, maybe in the past, maybe your consistency wasn't strong enough to keep you healthy enough because maybe you kind of kept trying to come back too quick or something like that. I mean, I'm just, uh, this is all assumptions. I don't know. I don't see your training. Well, I think in the past I have

tried to maybe get a little bit more weight on the bar too, too fast and been a little bit of a rush. But one thing that, you know, me and Jesse talk about is like when we're in the off season, it's, Hey, it's not a big deal to hit PRs and do all that stuff right now. It's about getting the work in kind of getting our body prepared for the next like big cycle coming up. And so just, you can't be in the red all year. You know, you can't, you know, you gotta like pick portions out of the year for me. There's no reason to. Yeah. Right. year. You know, you can't, you know, you gotta like pick portions out of the year for me. There's no reason to. Yeah.

Right. Yeah. For me, I think I'm always just going to look to do meets toward the summer and, you know, winter and then, you know, have my off season be through December through like, you know, February, March. That seems to work pretty well for me where I can kind of just tone it down a little bit. I know, uh, Jesse had Mikhail Kokulev and he had him at his gym doing a seminar. And he basically said, you know, if he wants to do a heavy lift, that's a lot of times it takes him a year to build up to it. And he also talked about in training that he won't really, he won't lift that big weight until the meet.

Now, when you did that, was that 897 pound deadlift or something? 887. 887 pound deadlift or something? 887. 887-pound deadlift. That is absolutely insane. When you did that deadlift, it looked like you had more in the tank, by the way. Did it feel like you could have lifted a little bit more that day? Oh, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I mean, it moved pretty damn fast, and the lockout was really strong.

I mean, usually on a big deadlift like that, a lot of times the guys are going to really struggle with the lockout or it might be kind of a soft lockout or might lose their grip a little bit. It looked like you had total control of it. It looked like you manhandled it. But what was the heaviest weight that you took in training leading up to that? 826. Yeah. So that's a, that's a, that's a pretty big distance, 826 pound pull. Um, and you probably just did that one time. And then what was the other lift that you did that was, uh, uh, the second heaviest lift maybe? Um, I mean, probably touched 765 or eight few times, not too much. Uh, just because I only have so many of those pulls in the year.

Right. I mean, if I could pull 800 pounds every day, I would, you know, cause it's fun, you know, but I can't and my body won't let me. So I've got to like, even on the days I feel really good, kind of just learning how to back off a little bit. Cause I, if I pull a 26 or if I pull somewhere in like the 90% and I feel the speed on it, I don't need to go. I don't feel the need to, to go up and wait.

Like I was like, okay, that one moved really well. I think I have like X amount more so we can maybe do that to me. Can you feel certain things with 600 pounds or is that not heavy enough? Oh, definitely. I mean, for me, once I get around like that five, just like, you know, like 550 to like 700, I can have a pretty good idea of how the day's going to go. Right. Yeah.

And then sometimes you guys are lifting with bands and chains and sometimes you'll do partial range of motion and stuff like that. So there might be some other variables that make the weight heavier at the top or something like that, right? Yeah, we do that a lot. Definitely. I mean, most of our lifts have some sort of a band chain or some other type of resistance on there.

And then when we get closer to the meat, of course, our lifts will get a little more specific when we're getting our openers and things like that. What about grip work? Do you mess with grip work at all? You just always had a good grip? Well, I suck with straps, so I never use them, really. So I've just always just grabbed the bar. I've never done any grip work or anything like that.

I think part of, uh, part of the grip stuff has a lot to do with how you lift the weight too. Um, you're not ever like when I see you lift, you're pretty upright. And so, um, most of the time when I see people, uh, drop a bar, it's because all the weight ends up in their fingers because they've rounded over and now they've got to use all their lower back and it just takes them too long to make the lift. And because it took them six or seven seconds to try to do the lift, um, therefore their grip wears out, but you do the lift so damn fast. It seems like less of an issue. Plus you're in a lot better, a lot better position. I always find that so interesting. A lot of the guys that pull big, they just, they don't ever have that issue with their grip.

So it's, it's never, it's never, uh, never something you really have to actually go outside of the deadlift and work on. Yeah. I did have issues with my grip one year. Um, it was not this last open, but maybe the one before that, um, my hands are just tearing all the time. And I actually had a jesse's uh wife katie helped me out with that she showed me like the wad stick or whatever like kind

of like filing the hands down and keep it nice and smooth because when it has like the uneven spots on your hand that's when like the bar kind of rips it up and the way i pull too like i get my overhand kind of rolls a little bit because i pull off the ground a little bit fast so it would like catch on those and like kind of rip my calluses up. You know, I haven't had that problem in a long time though. So that's been good. You know, heavy lifting heavy is not relative. You know, it's kind of hard.

It's kind of hard for people to understand that, but somebody, uh, and, and people will get a little bitchy about this, but whatever, it just is what it is. Lifting 400 pounds versus lifting 800 pounds is not related they're not related to each other even if the um even if the even if the 400 pounds is max for you it's not related to 800 pounds like things like tearing a callus and ripping your hand almost in half doesn't happen with 400 pounds it only happens to the guys that are lifting like seven eight nine hundred pounds they're, they're real big weights. And when you start getting into, uh, some of these guys that are handling and like yourself,

you handle the 800 pounds squat, these guys squat 900 pounds. Um, it's, it's hard to kind of explain and it's hard to understand the training for it because it just starts to get to be so different. Like you said, you can't put that weight on your back every week. You can't put that weight in your hands every week. It just doesn't get to a point where it just doesn't make any sense anymore. And for you, you put together a huge total at a, at a light body weight. And so that's also a factor. You know, if you weighed 330 pounds or 300 pounds, might be able to say, yeah, you know, we could probably squat a little heavier more often and

you'll probably be fine. Or we can bench a little heavier more often, but you were able to put everything together all in one day. Did you go nine for nine on the day? Yeah, I went nine for nine. It's I think the second time. Did you go 10 for 10? 10 for 10. No 10 for 10.

Maybe you should have took a fourth. 10 for 10 is afterwards when you get some from the old lady. Oh, then yeah. 10 for 10. 10 for 10. Hey, hey now, there we go. That's 10 for 10. Hi, Ir now there we go that's 10 for 10 hi arena i love you shout out andy bell 10 for 10 it only happened once in my career but i did it uh yep the old 10 for 10 trick so you were able to build up the bench too and the bench has been a weak point and

i think you said you benched around 4 30 yeah 4 35 so yeah the bench has been a weak point. And I think you said you benched around 430? Yeah, 435. So, yeah, the bench has always been a pretty weak point for me. But it's starting to come up a little bit. What's the deal with taking a lap? Taking a lap? I've seen some videos of you taking a lap. What's going on with that? It's just usually, you know, when I do something stupid, Jesse makes me run. So, yeah.

Yeah, I actually haven't taken too many laps lately, though. do something stupid. Jesse makes me run. So yeah. Yeah. I actually haven't, I haven't been, I haven't taken too many laps lately though. There's, there's some video of Jeremy and he's like

benching and like, I think he screws up his form. Jesse just shakes his head and goes, take a lap. And Jeremy just gets up off the bench and

just sprints around the building. Well, this one's awesome because of his, there, his footwear. Oh yeah.

Sandals. He's going with that, uh, Matt Wenning.als. He's going with that Matt Wenning. Yeah. Hey, it works for Matt Wenning. He benched over 600 pounds that way. Yeah, and that's what I'm going for, the Matt Wenning. What's the deal with the attire at this facility? It's all over the place here.

Yeah, it's all over the place. Look at that pink, that pink belt, the sandals. Well, the pink, I left my belt at uh i oftentimes leave my belt at the other gym so i borrow my friend andy's uh pink belt that's my backup belt actually that's the belt i first lifted 800 pounds in so i love that belt is andy kind of the mastermind of all this style that goes on over there is it more verdict uh man uh andy has his own style so maybe maybe Burdick's influencing everybody. Nobody dresses like Andy. Jesse always talks about how you leave your shit everywhere. Like it'll even be like a big meet and you're just like, ah, can somebody let me borrow their belt? And it's like, wait, what? I don't think I've done a meet where I haven't forgot something so far. Yeah. I don't think that's happened.

Do you think it's because, uh, like your nerves are going or because you're so laid back because you're just going to do what you always do man i just lose shit yeah i mean i don't know what i mean i've done i've tried to situate my life where i lose less stuff i got the fanny pack uh arena got me this phone wallet thing you know so but i mean it's all just i still lose it i think it must be a big deadlift thing because in SEMA has a crazy deadlift and he loses shit all the time too. He has those like tile things where he can like page his keys basically from his phone. Cause he's losing shit all the time.

It's really weird from in SEMA cause he doesn't seem like he would be unorganized. It seemed like he would have everything all lined up. Yeah. But yeah, he's very confused on where he puts things. I'm surprised to hear that. In SEMA,

get it together, man. I thought highly of you, man. Yeah, bro. It's gone. No, it's a big deadlifter thing, I guess. So there's a lot, you know, people are going crazy nowadays about diet, nutrition, and you got your own unique style. Yes, I do.

Jesse's told me a little bit about your diet. Can you explain what's going on with this nutrition that you have going on here? Yeah, I mean, it's pretty simple. I mean, you just do about 80% of your diet. You got to eat in your car. 50% of your diet comes from the gas station. And the other 25 comes from drive-thru. And then your significant other, you know, you guys have those other dinners together.

And then that's it. There you go. You just eat whatever you feel like. Whatever comes your way. Yeah. Have you ever had to pay attention to your diet in terms of like aesthetics? Not, not, not too much. Maybe just eat a little extra protein and you're good to go.

I mean, the only thing I, I mean, just since we're in weight class sport, I mean, I just kind of, I weigh myself a bunch, you know, and just try to look at the number on the scale a lot. And, you know, and just try to look at the number on the scale a lot. And, you know, if I have to cut for meat or. Hey, you look insane in this picture. It's my favorite picture of you. I think you're grabbing your junk there too. Yeah.

I was ready to, ready to die there. Maybe not die, but I wasn't feeling too great. What was that? 198? Yeah, that was the 198 cut there. Yeah. So I was hopping out of the Epson salt bath. It's crazy.

Craziness. Crazy talk. Crazy talk. Crazy talk over the homeless Jesus. So do you, do you, um, are you able to like basically just kind of eat what you want? You pretty much have, have always been that way or, or are you somebody, cause some people say that, but they usually eat, still eat pretty good. Are you kind of somewhere in between on that?

I mean, probably somewhere in between. I mean, I eat a lot of junk for sure. And I've always, I've never really had the, I've always had a really fast metabolism and stuff like that. I'm not like the beacon for health and fitness as far as nutrition goes. But I mean, I try to eat a lot of, I mean, I eat a lot of meat. I try to get a lot of, I've always tried, protein's the one thing I try to make sure I get enough of. I don't try to go crazy and get like one gram of protein per, you know, pound of body weight or like that, you know, you know, stuff like that.

So many people are listening right now. They're so mad. But you know, I mean, cause to me and barrel, I mean, carbs are pretty cool. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, you gotta be able to. Let's try to make sure I get my protein in.

And then after that, you know, just eat to feel good. Gas station food, the secret to having those back abs. Oh yeah, absolutely. Everything you need is at the gas station. Genetics are weird. You know, genetics are a weird thing. Anybody else in your family, like just maybe they don't lift and stuff, but like, just do you kind of recognize, like, do you have a brother or sister or anything like that?

Yeah, I got a brother and sister. Two half-sisters, one half-brother. My brother, we both have broad shoulders. My dad had kind of broad shoulders and stuff like that. But I guess that's about it. I get the gif, you know? And my dad was like, yeah, it's like definition. He wasn't like jacked or anything.

You're just kind of a mutant. And nobody knows where you came from. I guess guess so yeah nobody nobody's quite sure what happened i mean look at kaylor willem and and the similarities you know there's there's a lot of similarities between you guys where with kaylor like you know he doesn't have any overwhelming body parts but he takes off his shirt and his fucking back is just jacked. Yeah. Especially like his upper back. Yeah. When we, uh, when we did like the long time ago when we were both here, I remember seeing him in his t-shirt.

I was like, all right, well, whatever. And then, yeah, you see his shoulders, his upper back's fucking insane. And he's got like a giant elbow joint for some reason. It's like the biggest part of his body. Giant elbow joint. He's got an elbow joint. What's going on there? Him and Branch Warren.

I don't know if you noticed that. Branch is like, it was like. Yeah. Yeah. What's going on there? Him and Branch Warren. I don't know if you noticed that. Branch is like, it was like, what the hell? Yeah. Extra something there. Yeah, like his forearm thing or whatever. Yeah, it was just fucking sticking out like crazy. The gas station diet. So is that going to be something that's going to be downloadable soon?

Yeah, it's going to be. I'll have that e-book ready pretty soon for the, you know, just the $100, you know, for the four-week program. $200 for the premium. What's your favorite thing to get at the gas station? Oh, man. Just depends. If it's like a post-workout, I like to go with some Martinelli's apple juice and, you know, a nice pair of that with a peppered beef jerky. It goes together really nice.

Usually Jack Links, I think. And then, well, maybe if I'm listening to my Stan Efferding podcast, I'll get the orange juice with the vitamin C. Your girlfriend's in really good shape. Does she kind of shake her head at, like, the way that you eat? Yes. Is she just kind of like, what the hell? She gets so mad at me for it she gets because i

drink all the milk she'll get really upset with me or because i'm eating all the well no you know what that's actually really frustrating when you when you are with somebody else that's like not on this they're not on a plan and they're eating all your shit like that's never happened to me at home or anything but that's happened to me like when i traveled with uh wrestling there was a lot of other guys that like didn't adhere to like a diet and they would be like hey man let me get some of your protein or whatever or like they want you know want something that you bought or whatever i'm like you're so fat you're not even a fucking diet why do you want my shit like you normally don't care about what you eat so just go go about your business and get

mcdonald's you know yeah look at how jacked you guys are both of you back yep back to back back to back looking stacked yep yeah she's way more jacked her look at that look at it so she's uh she's obviously very supportive of your lifting what about um your parents do they ever go to any meets or anything like that oh yeah my mom's been to i think almost all of them except for the first one I did. Oh, cool. Yeah. So she loves coming out to them. My grandma gets out there sometimes too. Oh, that's awesome. So yeah, they're really, my family's super supportive of it for sure. And then your mom lives in this area, right?

Well, my mom actually works in this area. Works in this area, then lives in Santa Rosa. Yeah. Cool. And you've been, and you're tight with her? Super tight. Yeah. Me and my mom are, yeah, we talk like every day probably. Is that something that helped you through some tough times uh that you had in the past oh yeah definitely being close with your family stuff like that yeah definitely you know just you know through like my past my we have a very tight family yeah we're all we all stay in pretty close communication and stuff

that's that's really cool yeah so what was going on in your life before before powerlifting uh what was you know what was going on we we kind of have briefly touched on this before we talked about it when we had jesse burdick on the podcast um i guess you know you had a a past with addicted drugs yeah yeah and uh you know how how that, how did that kind of unfold? Um, well, I was. Started at a really young age or. Yeah. I mean, in my family, drugs and addiction, you know, like a lot of families. I mean, you're, you're, you dealt with that yourself.

Um. Yeah. My, a lot of my family, I've never not really shared a lot of that, but like a lot of it runs very deep in my family. Yeah. And I'll see that a lot of times too. I mean, it's usually not one person in the family a lot of that but like a lot of it runs very deep in my family yeah and i'll see that a lot of times too i mean it's usually not one person in the family a lot of times sometimes it is but usually you can kind of see it's sprinkled throughout but uh yeah my family drugs and addiction were pretty much run rampant through uh through through the whole family like my dad

uncle and aunt you know i've all had you, their battles with that. Were you aware of that when you were really young or no? I would say I became, like, my dad passed away when I was eight due to drugs. So I think he, yeah, it's like checked him. He was on like a, doing like the math or whatever. So he was like kind of like out of his mind a little bit. He was doing crystal math. Doing the crystal math. Back before it was cool. Yeah, but way before it. Doing the crystal meth. Back before it was cool.

Yeah. But way before it was cool. All right. Way before it was cool. Like I didn't know like exactly like that they're doing drugs, you know, just like the people like passed away or whatever. It wasn't, I mean, I probably found out like how they passed away when I was like 10 or 11.

So yeah. I mean, I was always growing up. My mom was like super protective because my dad had passed away to drugs uncle and aunt and all suicides too so like very like yeah very you know everyone so because of all that happening like everyone in my family that everyone was very protective of like the younger ones right right so i was always hearing about drugs and things like that since i was a kid even like you know or 13, my mom was super protective. Like, and so we talked about it a lot and stuff, but something switched over once, once, uh, once I got a little older where I was, when I was like younger, I was very anti all that, you know, because all the things that happened.

But, you know, uh, when I was like 12 or 13, I started getting pretty into it. So, yeah. but you know uh around like 12 or 13 i started getting pretty into it so yeah what do you think uh do you feel like at that age do you feel like or even today i guess but we'll just go back to that age at that age did you feel that there was something missing is that kind of why maybe you reached out for that sort of thing or just simply with a crowd that that was kind of what other people were doing and so you kind of went with that. Uh, I just, I mean, I, even at a young age,

I drank and did a lot of drugs on my own, like alone. Uh, it just felt, always felt so uncomfortable. Like, uh, even in seventh grade, I,

you know, we had like a dance coming up, you know? And so like, I would, I would like drink a little bit before school and stuff like that. Wow. That is a dangerous thing to learn at such a young age.

Yeah. Like, Hey, if I, if I drink some of this shit, it's going to take some of the edge off of going to this dance yeah so that would be very dangerous to know that at a young age like knowing as an adult it's like you can kind of pick and choose when you do it you can be like oh i'm gonna have a drink going into this social setting because it's going to be weird yeah because like my thing was like i'd be like at home you know on like the weekend maybe like one of my other homies they're like just

chilling like drinking i'm like man i feel great at home, you know, on like the weekend and maybe like one of my other homies are like just chilling, like drinking. I'm like, man, I feel great. If only I could feel this way all the time and around people, they would probably like me and I'd be super funny. So my plan was to be super cool guy at the new school I was at. But here's, but here's what actually happened. I got blackout drunk halfway through the day. I was going to one of my classes classes fell into like a thing of mud teacher saw me they called the ambulance i got picked up in the ambulance the whole school saw

me i came back like five days later like hey it's chunky boy or whatever they call me i was like sweet that plan went awesome so everybody kind of knew that you were drunk yeah yeah definitely i was like pretty well known for doing a lot of drugs and drinking and stuff i kind of just think i identified with that i guess at the time you know figured out a way to get your own access to those things or how did how were you able to get oh yeah i mean i guess people have them at their house and shit like that right well yeah well me and my me and one of my best friends uh a buddy growing up, we would go bother the homeless people, bring them some batteries and candles, and they'd buy us some 40s. We were helping each other out, helping out the community.

Wow. Yeah. That's wild. Did your mom kind of learn of this stuff later on? No, I was getting caught all the time. I was getting P-t since i was like 13 or 14 growing up and all that and yeah i got like started getting more serious trouble later i got like a dy when i was 16 so i that was that was great and got on the probation and stuff so i had

to go to school with a little little pager on your ankle and all that kind of good stuff so the consequences you know as i got older got worse and worse and worse but um any violence did you get into fights and stuff too or not really yeah i got the i got in the fights but not necessarily just because like drinking and stuff like that i got into a few little fights but i mean sometimes they go hand in hand because like there's just some you know you're just out of control i guess in some ways yeah uh or was it normal or you think it was kind of like normal kid fight i mean i think it was normal like kid fight a lot of kids get in a fight yeah you know we got into like you know fights here and there

a lot of people and stuff like that but i don't think it was anything like out of the ordinary too much right i was mostly damaging myself when i get drunk i like trip and fall and bust my lip or you know bit through my tongue once once. Lots of stuff like that. So growing up, you kind of have learned that, you know, some of the other family members had drug issues and you mentioned there were some suicides. Did your dad, did he kill himself? Yeah. Yeah. I guess he had, him and my mom had split up.

They were married, but they, like, split up. So I think that was kind of, like, maybe one of the catalysts for him. He was also sober for a while. My mom's sober as well. So, like, they were both sober for a while, and then he had, like, relapsed. So she, like, booed him out rightfully so, and then, you know, he did what he did. Yeah. A lot of times you don't learn how people die exactly.

Like, with my uncle and my brother I actually don't even really know exactly how they died. Yeah, it's kind of sad But like when someone dies in like a recovery home You know, it's not like it's not like the President United States died. So they're not gonna like investigate it They don't really care. Yeah, they're like, oh, it's another just another number, you know It's another number. It's actually just a literal number on the wall Well, like they have them they have them up on the wall you can see them there's hundreds of them it's like fuck you know just another another stat basically yeah i mean drugs have you know they got the

numbers you know they got numbers for sure how how um you know how did it progress from alcohol in into some other things or or did you with, with other drugs when you were young too? Yes. Well, when I was, well, first I was just drinking mostly and alcohol probably got me in the most trouble. Um, so when I got that, uh, DUI, I got put on a probation. So I was getting putested by, you know, the state, whoever the county or state or wherever does that. So I was looking for drugs that would get out of my system faster than weed so that's when i you know dabbling with a little bit of a cocaine and ecstasy and things like that um so that's probably when that started like you know like sophomore in high school or something like that so and then from there it went went worse and then like those like party drugs kind of fun you know and stuff like that but when it got bad for me it's more

like using like the oxycontin and know, heroin and all those other fun ones. Yeah. Was there ever a point where you were like, you know, getting a DUI and something? I mean, you get the DUI. I mean, somebody must explain to you like, hey, listen, you know, you fuckhead. You could kill, you could, okay, now, okay. It's one thing to hurt yourself, one thing to harm yourself. And if you want to be, you want to go down this road and, and, and this is something that you want to do, then fucking have at it. But you could hurt somebody else.

You could kill somebody else. Yeah. I mean, somebody must've had that conversation with you, but you weren't able to stop. Absolutely. I mean, I'd got two, I've had two DUIs in my life. Uh, one when I was both before I was able to drink. Yeah. 16 and 20.

Right. So, yeah, you know, I've had those conversations with a lot of people, you know. The consequences, for whatever reason, just weren't enough for me to deter me. Because I just felt so uncomfortable all the time growing up. I just never really felt like I had, like, my place and never felt comfortable in my own skin i mean i mean but the alcohol and the drugs they weren't getting you really what you wanted either right well they were and they weren't right i mean there's a lot of times when i would do those things it would be a lot of fun they'd get you there short term exactly short term you know but that was the

best i had. I didn't, I didn't know, I didn't really have any other tools or I hadn't really taken the time to develop anything else. You know, I'd always, you know, if you always reach for the hammer, the only thing you know to use the hammer, you know, so I was always. Gonna use this for everything. So I was getting hammered all the time. So yeah.

And you know, as I got older, you know, and I, and like, I just never fell out of those habits, you know, partying and drinking and then now I'm out of high school, you know, and I'm doing, you know, it's getting worse and worse. But I think, you know, the thing that kind of got me, so, I mean, I've been in and out of AA since I was like 17, you know, 16 doing in and out of that stuff you know and i had like been to countless rehabs you know and uh probably three or four different rehabs and like four or five different detoxes tons of sle's you know so i'd been in and out of like being sober being not sober sober and not sober but i guess the the thing that kind of set it off this last time was I had the overdose.

I was using heroin and methamphetamine together, which is a pretty cool combination. If you can get it just perfect, it's like being on teeter-totter, you know, trying to balance things out. But I didn't, again, didn't really work out too well for me. Ended up overdosing like three times in like four months. Wow. So twice, you know i got with that where they come get you with the narcan and take you away for a little bit so yeah then the last thing but the thing that did it was uh you know the other times i had like kind of overdosed and

stuff like that it was just like me and like one of my buddies so i just to me it was like i just fell asleep and woke up and they were looking at me like oh shit i was like oh it's fine man i'll just well nah you know no big deal but the last one when i woke up is there was like in a parking lot like like albertsons or something like that uh it's like a really nice day just wake up i'm like looking up at the sun and there's like 50 people around me like just looking at me with like these like faces i was like oh shit like i did something bad like so it's like weird like you like see yourself through them a little bit. Right.

They're all looking at you, like, horrified. And then you got these ambulance around you, like, cutting off my shirt. And I was just, like, just had, like, a little moment of, like, what the fuck am I doing? Like, how did I get here, man? I was, like, you know, like, 24 this time, you know? And I'm, like. How old are you now? 30.

I'll be 31 in January. Oh, okay. You know, so this was, like. So that was the last time I, like I got high and stuff like that there. So I just got lucky from there. I went to a rehab for like 26 days. And since then, I think that was in like 2012 maybe, I think. I think it was like 2012 or 11 maybe, something like that.

And that was like the last of that stuff. So you think there's anything that a parent can do at all to prevent any, any of what you went through? Um, man, it's like, it sounds like probably not. It's a beast.

I mean, I mean, you're my, my mom got help from a lot of people, you know, she hired like a interventionist, you know, we did. Yeah. Cause she knew, she knew what could be the end result.

Um, did you feel enough love in your house? Like you, you got enough hugs and kisses. Yeah, man. I got tons of love. You know what I mean? My mom, like my family, like they're like, that wasn't lacking there at all. It was just, uh, I don't know. It might be like your, your, it's your own journey. I think sometimes I think like sometimes like, uh, you know, my brother, he would always say he wasn't lacking there at all. It was just, uh, it might be like your, your, it's your own journey.

I think sometimes I think like sometimes like, uh, you know, my brother, he would always say he wasn't built to be here. Like he was like, I had not built to be here very long. And he,

he kind of, even when he was like sober, he'd say still hated life. You know, he, he didn't go through moments of like hating life and not hating life. He fucking always hated it. And so that's what makes it so easy to talk about it nowadays. It's not as, it's not as painful to talk about it

because I'm like, he told me that many times and he meant it. I think he really meant it. He was, for whatever reason, I think he was kind of like a tortured soul. If there is such a thing, um, he, he really, uh, butted up against himself every day. And I can't imagine what that would be like, you know, to be, to be depressed or to be happy and to have you know some highs and some lows that's cool i can deal with that but like his were off the charts you know and i don't know i don't know anything about what that's like so um i think a lot of people place a lot of judgment on that and there's a lot of mental health issues and a lot of the uh a lot of people that you were uh giving candles to and different

things like those people end up on the street because of mental health issues a lot of people just judge it and they think they just dismiss it and they're like oh it's the guy's a loser you know the guy's a bum and well okay the guy got addicted to drugs but the guy probably has some really uh fucked up circumstances that got him to where he is. And it sucks that he's there, but there's not a lot of easy solutions to any of this. Yeah, I think it's pretty easy for people to kind of say that because it's kind of a complicated issue. So when people don't understand, it's just easy to say, oh, he's just fucked up.

Oh, he's just not trying. Or he doesn't have the will, but this, this, that, or the other. You know, all that kind of stuff. But, you know, people do have, you know, you know, the mental health issues are tough because you can't see them. You know, when somebody has cancer, their hair's falling out, you know, it's like their hair's falling out. You know, you can, you can see it, but you can't always see it with people who are, you know, towards you. Look at people like Robin Williams or lots of people like that, you know, who look so happy and stuff like that. So it's hard to identify. And then there's some people who may be on the other end where they're crying about every little thing.

So, you know what I mean? And then they're, you know, I'm so, I'm so depressed. You know, I lost, you know, this, that, you know, so. So sometimes people are like, oh, it's just bullshit, you know, but there's a lot of gray area in there. And I think you just, yeah. I mean, hopefully the people, if you're, if you're someone who's struggling with that stuff, hopefully you have people around you for when you're ready to accept help. That helps around you, at least.

One thing I learned from powerlifting and from pro wrestling was to just never really judge other people's pain, period. I did that for a while and uh just not productive you know like i would just say oh that guy's a fucking pussy like the guy the guy can't wrestle this week he's just being a bitch you know and i would be frustrated and then uh but it didn't do anybody any good and i was like you know what why why that's what a shitty mentality to have like maybe that guy's just really hurt and you you know what? It's none of my business. Yeah. You know, or maybe he just doesn't feel like, uh, getting in the ring or maybe the person

doesn't feel like, uh, benching heavy for that day and, and they want to blame it on their shoulder or whatever. So what? It doesn't hurt. You know, I can try, all I can do is try to encourage people. All I can do is try to be, uh, friendly to people. And if they say they're really hurt, if we're friends and they got no reason to lie to me, all I can do is believe them. Yeah. You know, but the point is

you don't know the kind of pain that people are in period, you know, life can be very dark and life can be, uh, very fierce at times. And it, not everyone always has the coping skills, uh, to be able to figure out how to deal with everything. Yeah, definitely. I mean, it's hard. I mean, everybody, everybody reacts to things differently, you know, for example, like I lost my dad, my uncle and my aunt, and I did what I did, you know, when I, I felt like that gave me like the green light to do all the drugs I wanted. And I got a lot of slack because people felt bad for me.

You know, they're like, like, oh, you know, the poor little fucker fucker you don't get all the stuff that's happened yeah you know so like and that's like your identity so when you're 17 and you're at school and you're the new kid as you mentioned and you're the guy who drinks well now you're the guy who drinks and this whole this whole image gets painted of you oh he's not just the guy that drinks you know his dad took his life when he was you know when jeremy was life when he was you know when jeremy was only eight years old now it's a whole different thing and it's like oh that's it's it's a whole story that's created and uh the hardest thing in the world to ever do is to fight and try to figure out how to overcome like your own identity yeah now you got to be a

different person and then the guys that you would, uh, you know, I'm sure like in this process, you're, uh, you know, you end up with some,

uh, pretty grungy friends, right? And, and there's people dealing shit and doing this and that. And those are all people that are in your circle. I ain't doing that anymore. Like what,

what do you mean? No, I'm not into that anymore, man. I'm kind of, I'm doing, doing some different stuff now. No,

what do you mean? Like, what are you going to church, bro? Like, what are you doing? Like, don't be into that anymore, man. I'm kind of, I'm doing, doing some different stuff now. No. What do you mean? Like, what are you going to church, bro? Like, what are you doing? Like, don't be a bitch. Come on, man. Yeah. Yeah. Come on, bro.

This one time isn't going to kill you. Yeah. You just, for me, I just changed my number. I mean, you can't even be around those people. It was funny. Like, uh, and you run into them all the, everywhere you go too. Cause I, I'm like, uh, you know, get in trouble. I have to go to a program, go to a sober living house.

And I'd be like in the sober living house, like three of my buddies, we'd stay sober for like five seconds. Like, Hey man, what do you want to do? I don't know. You want to go to that meeting? Oh yeah, sure. Or we could. Yeah, let's do that. So like all three of you are the devil on the shoulder.

Yeah. There's not one, not one angel to pull the other way. Nobody has a good fucking idea at all. So it's just like, you have to just cut. You know, I always felt like I had to explain myself to people. But this last time I was like, ah, fuck all you guys. You don't care about me. Changing my number.

You know, if I run into, you know, if we're meant to be friends and my wife, then I'm sure it'll work out. Right. Are you religious at all? No, not really. I mean, I've been to church a few times, but definitely not like wouldn't consider myself like a religious person. Do you believe in God? Um, I think there might be something out there, you know, I don't, you know, I don't roll

it out or anything, you know? I just asked that. Cause a lot of times, like that's part of the, like the steps, right? That's part of the steps that you got to kind of, uh, I guess agree that there's like a higher power or something like that. Well, just the main idea there is just, uh, that you ain't it. not you're like there's you're not in control necessarily you're not in control that there's bigger things that work than you and your ideas and stuff like that so i think that's like the you know concept yeah the concept of it and you don't even have to like say god or whatever

and all that stuff but yeah that's kind of the idea of it did you have like a mentor or someone i mean was mom just there or like somebody just where you're like, you know what? Like this person is, they're just like, I'm sure when you're 17, you don't care that your mom's helping you. You probably run right over her,

you know, like, like a lot of times you run over the people that are closest to you. Yeah. That's what my brother, my brother ran over all of us a million times over and we didn't care because we're, we love him. He was my brother, you know, I wouldn't have it any other way.

Um, but like, did you kind of like realize like, shit, man, like mom is just, she's just right there for me all the time. Or was there some, someone else too? Yeah. You know, I mean, I was pretty lucky growing up, uh, because I, you know, I met, I met a lot of people that are like family, but not quite family, you know, like my best friend growing up, like even if we're both grounded, he could come spend the night, you know, our families are super tight, you know, like, like kind

of sort of that sort of deal. And also, you know, like my uncle, my uncle Josh, who had passed away as a, his best friend or whatever it was. He's like my, uh, my uncle Ivers or whatever. He like hung around you know like always took us out on the weekends and stuff growing up so you know like like our family took a lot of losses but like that stuff kind of brought everyone closer together and even people weren't our part of our family were coming in and helping us and just kind of hanging out with you

know me when i was younger which when i got older i realized like holy shit man he's coming over every weekend for like two years we're doing all this stuff. Like, kind of appreciate that as you get older. Like, he was, like, 22 at the time. So, you know, like, picking those weekends out is a tough thing. So I was pretty lucky, you know, with that. I had a lot of people. I always felt like I had people around me that loved me and stuff.

So, yeah. I just always, but my thing was, like, I always felt like i was letting them down and stuff like that and i wasn't like really living up to you know what they thought i could be or you know or whatever i'd always heard the word potential right did that place a lot i mean that place a lot of stress on you you feel um not too much um but i just remember when i was like younger i just always felt destined to be like a fuck up or like drug, you know, just like, you know,

just cause like it was just so around, you know? And again, I also like just kind of like use it as an excuse and stuff like that. Right. You know, as I got older, I kind of grew out of that thinking,

which I think you have to, if you're ever going to escape that. When you were younger, did you like, uh, you know, you're kind of labeled the, uh,

the drunk guy or whatever. Um, did you see like older dudes kind of messing with drugs and be like i'm never gonna be that um when i was like 11 or i mean like you know much younger like you know like my sister would be like doing some odd stuff and i'm like oh i'm never gonna smoke weed or that stuff and then like you know like 12 13 doing that stuff it's not as bad as i thought but i'm definitely not gonna fuck with meth or anything else that was the one that i always told myself i would never do because i was like you know that i you know i've taken my dad yeah down

so right and plus you know it takes all your teeth and you look like a weirdo and you know you think everybody's after you the shadow people and shit so that seemed a little bit too stressful so that's one that you never did. No, it's one that I absolutely did a lot of. I just waited till the end. Yeah. Finale.

Yeah. Yeah. I just waited for the end, you know? Um, yeah. Like, cause meth is super cheap and heroin's not super cheap and withdrawing from heroin sucks.

So you just buy meth, get high on meth, withdrawal's gone. So, yeah. And that's like a pretty common thing buy meth, get high on meth, withdrawal is gone. So, yeah. And that's like a pretty common thing. Like for like, you know, back where in Santa Rosa I'm from, it's like whatever story I'm saying is the story of like a bajillion people there. Like we're all like, you know, we're like in high school, we're all doing the Oxycontins together, you know, or all the guys on the football team, you know. Oxycontins together, you know, or all the guys on the football team, you know, uh, and then once Purdue pharma, uh, took that away where you couldn't smoke it or shoot it or do all the fun

stuff with it. All those people are doing Oxycontin kind of moved over to heroin and meth and things like that. Cause you just kind of get like, you're always going to find a way. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. You'll find, you'll find whatever, you know, so. Was it, um, um i mean it sounds like a weird comparison but like for you like to me like drugs you know uh have such a crazy stigma to them like i remember finding like um i worked uh at this uh bar in hermosa beach uh called sharkies and that's actually where i met my wife and uh i found something on the ground one time i picked it up and i was i like looked at it and i was like oh shit like i don't even know what this shit looks like but i think this is cocaine and i i was like well fuck now i'm holding the thing of cocaine and so i threw it in the toilet i flushed it down the toilet and i i told i told him yeah i was all

scared i was like what if somebody saw me with that and i told my older brother i was like i was like dude i was like i just had like a little with that? And I told my older brother, I was like, I was like, dude, I was like, I just had like a little thing of cocaine. And he's like, where is it? He's like, I, he's like, I want to sell it. He's like, well, I will sell that shit. And, uh, I was like, I flushed it out. He's like, what?

He's like, that probably was, I don't know. He said X amount of dollars worth of it or whatever. And I was like, I don't know, man. I just, but for you and for your friends, because it was kind of part of what you guys were doing, was that like as common as like playing a video game i mean absolutely i mean we just sit around all day it was never like like he's doing he's doing that i can't believe there's no one just it was just part of every day it just becomes like you kind of desensitize like i remember the first time i saw somebody like smoking heroin or smoking like a pill i was like oh that looks fucking stupid it's all foil looks

all dumb and stuff and like 10 minutes later that looks fucking stupid. It's all foil. It's all dumb and stuff. And like 10 minutes later, that's not so bad. It's kind of cool actually. Yeah. Yeah. It kind of hits you fast. You're right guys.

Good idea. You guys do like out in the open, like you wouldn't go to like, like say like it's someone's house. Like, Hey, let's go to the back room or whatever. It's just like living room.

Bam. Wolf. I mean, it just depends the company that we're in. Yeah. If it was just us dirt bags together, you know, yeah,

go ahead. Yeah. Damn. That's terrifying, dude. Like, I'm just thinking when you're saying like, you know, when you're 24, when you mixed whatever you did and woke up in an parking lot, I'm just thinking like, dude, you're such a cool guy. Like, fuck. Like, it scares the shit out of me thinking what could have been. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. I just got, I mean, I think about that. Definitely anything costs my mind a lot,

you know, I'm just pretty lucky. Does some of that like kind of play in your mind at times like today? Like, yeah. As far as like, like a demon, like still chasing you.

Yeah, man. I feel like I always need to be running towards something, you know? So, you know, powerlifting gave me something to run toward, you know,

a lot of other things to run towards now as well, but if you're just standing still, you're going to get got at least that's all I feel. Yeah. So I need to keep moving. Yeah. With, um, and with powerlifting too, I mean, powerlifting is, it has its own dangers too, or, or anything that you get into and take too seriously because now, okay, that's cool. You overcame, uh, that old stigma and that identity and you didn't really overcome it because it's a, it's a daily fight. Like, let's not, you know, make it sound like it's anything different than it is. You still have to kind of battle that, correct?

A hundred percent. Yeah. I mean, they kind of say once an addict, always an addict. You got to be very cautious on how you live the rest of your life. So it's not like, yay, I'm in the clear. Like I did this thing. I'm good. Good to go. Oh no. It's uh not like, yay, I'm in the clear. Like I did this thing. I'm good. Good to go.

Oh no, it's a, yeah, it's, you do it forever. And you know, I've like, I've,

you know, I see like a psychiatrist every, about once every six weeks or something like that. Like, yeah, probably up that a little bit more, you know, but you know,

I try to just, you know, I think that's amazing to share with other people because I, I try to, you know, share that message here often. I think, man, if you're just, if you're just confused about like different decisions and stuff that you're trying to make, try to go see somebody. And, you know, maybe a lot of times the first

session's free. You can go to any church, you go to any church, and even if you're not religious, you can go to just about any church and say, look, man, I got some problems. You'll get someone there that will be able to, that will listen to you. I recommended that to a lot of people. A lot of people have actually taken me up on it and they've, they've gotten, they've gotten some really good help. The first person you go to might suck, you know, so you might have to go to like more than one person, but, uh,

so a lot of times just you saying the situation out loud. This is huge. Helps you digest it all. Cause you'll, you might say, Oh man, you know, my new boss at this job, he's got it in for me.

And then you realize like, Jeremy, like, dude, your boss doesn't have it in for you. He just wants you to show up on time. You know what I mean? Once you say it out loud,

you're like, I, okay, I really sound kind of dumb. And so it's not even so much the psychiatrist. It's just that you went to someone and spoke to somebody. Got to work through your thoughts. Exactly. And that's somewhat helpful for me because we all have blind spots. You don't know where they are because they're blind spots. So it's good for me anyways. You know, I have like, I'm pretty lucky. I have like

people to run things by, kind of filter things through before I actually decide to take action. How has Jesse helped in this whole thing? You know, I mean, he seems like a mentor in a lot of ways. He seems more than just a coach. Oh yeah, for sure. I mean, Jesse's a, you know, great dad, great husband, great dad again. You know, every, he just helps people all day and he's definitely like a good example of like somebody who does like a steamable wax all day.

Like I just see him at the gym, gives everybody his time, whether you're pulling 900 pounds or 90 pounds, like you get like the same eye and the same, the same treatment, you know, he treats everybody really fair. Jesse's very relatable too, as a human being, you know, like he, he, he's gone through a lot of really hard times and and to watch him you know be a single dad for you know as long as i got to kind of witness some of that it was really really wild and he he went through his own you know his own very dark times and he had to sort through all those things on his own and that was always the main concern for me as his friend was like hey man who are you hanging out with what are you doing like where are you going like and that's why with him i i you know we were kind of trying to steer the ship you know we're trying to figure out like what's next for him what what are we going to point him towards because as you said if you're not going towards

something what are you what are you doing right so uh i was like let's get you you know let's get you to do a power thing to me he was like dude he's like i he's like no he's like there's no possible way he's like i have zero strength and i don't want to lift and i was like well let's maybe you know let's maybe think about it looking a little different than your actual powerlifting career maybe it's just you know some kind of almost recreational powerlifting. He's like, ah, you know, he was like, not all about it. Right. Yeah. And then the kind of idea came up, I think he came up with the idea was, well, let me try to run through some different weight classes since I already lost a lot of weight. I was like, yeah, now, now we're talking, you know, you could still, uh, you know, squat 700 pounds at 242 or 220 or whatever the

weight class was. And it can sound a lot more respectable and it's not, it's not going to, um, it's not going to deflate his ego. Right. And so that's what we did. And we set our sights on these different things. He had these different goals and, uh, he was able to kind of recalibrate his life and, and, uh, and get himself just feeling good again and feeling happy.

But as I was going to mention before, you got to be kind of careful about these identities that you have. You know, you, you, you met a wonderful person. You have a great girlfriend. You guys seem to have a great relationship together. And, you know, to me, it's like, yeah, powerlifting is great. And not to be all corny about like relationships and stuff, but that is a, like, man, that is a huge deal. You know, you might, you might've met somebody that you might be with the rest of your life. You might be 85 years old. You might be the same with the same person. You

know, that may sound great. That might sound bad. It depends on, depends on where you're at, but, um, that's a, that is a huge deal. And that is something that, uh that is a huge deal and that is something that uh is really important and so your identity isn't necessarily that you are uh i don't want to say just a power lifter you're not uh a power lifter you're a power lifter uh that does a lot of other things too you got a lot of other responsibilities in your life yeah definitely and that's definitely something like this like last year been you know know, tried to always like remember and stuff and stuff like that. Because before I was a power lifter or whatever, I was just this drug addict, junkie, can't

get it together in and out of fucking rehab and stuff where that was just like, you know, like that was what I was most known for by a lot. Um, so it was just, I was like so happy to be known for something else. And like, and plus in like powerlifting, uh, nobody knew anything about like my past prior. So it was just like, I was just this different dude and it was great. Like, I, I really liked that. That was like, right. Very nice. And you gotta be a little cautious too, because like, what about after powerlifting or, or let's just say that, uh, you know, you end up with an injury that doesn't really allow you to compete at the level that you want to compete at.

You can't just really do it anymore the way you want. Are you still kind of trying to hang on to being the power lifter guy, or are you able to kind of move into some different things, you know? Well, I think just the experience of, uh, getting into powerlifting and sticking with it. And, you know, there's times when I probably could have gotten out or things like that, you know, but, um, you know, I stuck with the powerlifting and it worked out. So I feel it's given me confidence that, Hey, if I was, if I was able to do this with

powerlifting, I can probably do this with something else, you know, I'll probably be able to apply this somewhere else. And then, and that's kind of, you know, what I want to do, uh, prepare for, you know, cause we can't, I mean, we're not going to be able to lift these weights forever. Everybody has a shelf life. What do you do for work? I work, coach classes, personal training, work people online as well. I work out in San Francisco at the park gym.

Awesome. So I teach a powerlifting class there a few times a week. Sweet. Yeah. Just, you know, we just do like the max effort days there. Yeah. And then, you know, on their own, if they want to do the repetition stuff on their own, they can. We're actually opening up a new gym, 12th and Geary.

That's cool. Yeah. So that'll be cool. Your girlfriend trains people too, right? Yeah. She's a, she works over at Stanford. Okay. So you work at different places.

Yeah. We're working on different places. Yeah. She teaches Olympic lifting over there. She has a class over there. She's butt and you know she is it embarrassing that she's stronger than you a little bit i mean yeah she can lift way more things over her head than i can it's impossible you can't do it no overhead no it's impossible i mean i remember and jesse burdick's wife too katie hogan you know i, I want to say, shit, I, man, I might

maybe get the numbers wrong, but I want to say I've seen her like overhead squat, like maybe like 275 or something. Maybe it was even just 225, but I can't do either way. I can't do either one of those. I might be able to figure out how to do a plate, but I think I would fall.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You, you, I think I saw you put your seatbelt on earlier, so I don't think that the overhead You were impressed. I was impressed. Yeah. A little extra. A little extra push. Yeah. You, you, I think I saw you put your seatbelt on earlier, so I don't think that the overheads. You were impressed. I was impressed. Yeah.

A little extra push. Yeah. Right there. A little extra blood flow to the, uh, lower front region. You know what I'm saying? That's all I show. That's all I show my impressiveness. 70% of communication is nonverbal.

Oh, I know. I know. You know, the other thing about all this is like you going through, uh, everything that you went through and, and you're not gonna, you're gonna fall down when I say this, you seem, and, and Jesse's definitely gonna, Jesse's gonna roll over in his grave and he's not even dead yet, but you seem extremely intelligent. Like you seem like you've learned, it seemed like you've learned a, uh, a life's work of, uh, of knowledge, uh uh going through what you went

through yeah you know i mean spend spend a lot of time just trying to like figure myself out and you know and figure out like you're not enough you're not a knucklehead from the streets you know what i mean like a lot of guys are a lot of guys are like hey yo i don't know i'm gonna do next you're definitely i mean i don't know if I'm going to do next. You're definitely, I mean, I don't know if you're into like reading books and shit like that, or I don't know what you're into, but you've obviously have, you've learned a lot, you know, going through this. And a lot of people don't ever scrape the surface of, of any of the things that you did, you did at such a young age that there's people that are 40, 50, 60 years old that have never dug deep because they never had to.

So they never had the resistance. So while it sucks, you went through everything you went through. At least you got to learn some of these. I mean, shitty way to learn them. But you had an opportunity that maybe other people wouldn't have had. And it's great that you're still here as a result of all the crazy shit that you did. Yeah. I mean, I'm not happy that all those things happen and stuff

like that, but I like, I love my life today. I like to be here talking to you. You know what I mean? Like, this is great. Like, uh, when I first got out of rehab, uh, this last time, the last time I ever got out of rehab, um, my buddy Tyler, he actually used to work with you in my. Yeah. I know Tyler.

Yeah. Crazy ass Tyler. Crazy ass Tyler. Crazy ass Tyler. He's down in like Los Angeles. He's uh, yeah. Malibu. Uh, or just outside of Malibu. I like Tyler a lot.

He's a good dude. Yeah. So man, that guy, I kind of hooked up with him somehow right up. Cause, uh, we're both kind of in the rooms a little bit. So I just kind of linked up with him. Skinny as hell. He was always trying to work on being jacked. Dude.

He can never figure it out. I stayed on his, I lived with him for like three months and I would just stay on his like hardwood floor in the living room. He and his other buddy. And we were just, we did, we're doing West side for skinny bastards. I think the program we're doing 300, 200 pounds, you're skinny bastard. Yeah. So we're like Joe DeFranco or something, right?

Yeah. So we're doing that program. I never even heard a power lift thing. I was just like, I can stay here and you have food tight. Cause I, my, my family wasn't, they weren't really fucking with me at the time. They're like, no, that's good. He went to rehab, but maybe, maybe you stay out there a little longer. It's like, okay.

That, that does happen. You know, your family can only handle so much. Yeah. You kind of, I like earn my way back in, you know, I'm allowed back at Thanksgiving now, but, uh, yeah, Ty, uh, uh got me this is the one that kind of got me into the power lifting thing we used to just hang there and we would watch uh you know uh the fuck your elbow video and we used to watch this other really funny one it was uh you and jesse and you guys are talking to these crossfit people before you met either one of us yeah before i met

i don't want you guys and uh this nerd was like yeah it's all about kilowatts to something or and you're like yeah it's all about kilowatts to something. And you're like, yeah, it's all about kilowatts to power out. Right. And you guys, you know, talking about eating Doritos in between the sets. So we would do the same, chocolate milk, Doritos and stuff. That's great. We would have eating competitions at night so you could gain the most weight in an hour. So like, yeah.

Dude, Jesse and I found like magical powers from specifically Doritos. Dude, Doritos? Don't sleep on Doritos. It's crazy. I don't even know. Like Jesse and actually John Kiefer. John Kiefer was like, he was like, hey, listen, you know, when it comes to like unhealthy foods and foods that are bad, he's like, it's just like foods that are good. Like not everything about them is good. And just like foods that are good like not everything about them is good

and just like foods that are bad not everything about them is bad he's like a dorito is so fucked up that you don't even know like its original form like what was it and he's like he goes i think you guys need to eat more foods like that that we don't know what they originally like were like where did it come from i guess it came from like corn right that's the point but you need like you know it needs to have all this crap on it and he's like i think it will help you with like weight gain and stuff and i don't know jesse and i were just at the time we would still eat like i don't want to say healthy necessarily but we would kind of like you're saying like eat a lot of protein and make sure that we were doing stuff to support us staying big yeah but we would still get after it with things like Doritos.

Yeah. Cause we were just trying to gain the way. I mean, when I went on, when I went to rehab, I was 159 pounds. Uh, I gained like 20 pounds.

Are there pictures maybe on your IG that we can find? Or you got, uh, I got, I don't, not on the IG, but I do have, you got one.

I could probably look up in a second here. Let me see it. You can pull it up later and just, you can send it to us and then we'll, we'll share it because we're going to do a bunch of videos with Jeremy later. We got to get, get video footage of his back abs and him and, him and Filipino Thunder are

going to bang out some squats today. I think you mentioned you were going to do a walking lunge with whatever Marcus did for his max squat today, right? That's correct. And then you mentioned you were going to do a walking lunge with whatever Marcus did for his max squat today, right? That's correct. And then you're going to switch that into a overhead press. Yeah.

Into a. With the bands and chains as well. And a hip circle on. And a hip circle on. Don't forget about that. And you're going to turn it into overhead box squat. That's right.

Overhead box squats are the future. You know what would be great is while Marcus is squatting, if you just lifted him over your head. Just get underneath him. Get underneath him over your head. Just get underneath him. Get underneath him. I just get underneath him. When he hits that, that's when I start. That's right.

That's when I start. Because his shoulder. Like a cheerleading thing. Yes. That would be perfect. Marcus, we got that. You could do it. Yeah, I can do anything.

You know, Filipino Thunder, he's a shame to admit it, but his real nickname is the Manatee. The Manatee? Yeah. The Manatee? Yeah, the Manatee. It doesn't sound quite as fierce as Filipino Thunder, right? Yeah, Filipino Thunder is pretty cool. It is pretty cool. The Manatee doesn't sound formidable. If he was a pro wrestler, he'd much rather be Filipino Thunder.

He'd come out, and he'd have the ACDC music going, right? Yeah, you can't even say manatee that cool. No, you can't. Here comes the manatee. You can't really yell it or nothing. No, nothing like that. The fans can't get behind it, but that's what he is. He's like a giant manatee.

He's in the background. Like I'm shooting these videos and I'm like explaining like how to bench or something. And there Marcus is being all kinds of fat. Like he looks like he got shot he's laying down on the ground and he's using the bar to like marcus does all these exercises like where he's rolling out and stretching and he he does all like the jesse burdick stuff and kelly's stuff i've never i've never done anything i just never heard of it no it sounds terrible sounds like too much extra work and so he's like digging the bar into like

his shoulder and then somebody on um youtube wrote like who's the fat walrus on the ground who's the who and somebody called him a manatee or something like that and i was like oh he's forever the manatee and i i know marcus is like he's such a badass guy i was like he's gonna really hate that nickname so that's gonna be so perfect just to call him the manatee. And so we made a shirt where he kind of like looks like a mermaid. That's that shirt. I was wondering what the fuck's up with that shirt. You'll get, you'll receive one if, uh, if, if you, uh, keep heading in this direction, buddy.

All right. You can earn one today. Earn a shirt? Word. You're going to have to squat 135 below parallel. Below parallel? No, nevermind. Oh my God.

Yes, he's carrying the giant lightning bolt. Oh yeah. That's a big boy though. Yeah, he's looking thick. Filipino Thunder is a big boy. Now you got some strong ass lifters up where you guys are at too. You got multiple people that have set world records. You got Tiny Tiff up there.

Tiny Tiff? She just competed in the USAPO, right? Yeah, she did. She got a second in her weight class. Dude, I got to admit, I do not know how that girl gets past drug testing. Dude, I mean, she's really smart. She's on some gear.

I know. Right? A lot of it. All of it, really. She's on a lot of sauce. A lot. A lot of sauce. I mean, you see her legs? Yeah, they're quads. They're huge. It's not natural. Quads. Right? A lot of it. All of it, really. She's on a lot of sauce. A lot. A lot of sauce. I mean, you see her legs?

Yeah. They're quads. They're huge. It's not natural. Quads for days. It's not natural. Look, I know Tiff best, and I'd be the best one to say this. Tiff's quads aren't natural.

See? Just the quads aren't natural. Okay. See, I think. She's on the Doritos. I think she might be on the Doritos. I kind of have a theory that with your drug background that you're helping her pass a drug test.

Because you're like, Tiff, if you miss crystal math. They're not testing for crystal math, okay? That's for sure. Oh my god, she squatted like four feet below parallel. I know. Look at her go. Which is hard because she's only four feet tall. Yeah, the whole way. She doesn't know where she's going. She's so lost. She doesn't, yeah, that means, yeah means she has that face on her face a lot. You have a lot of great support at that gym and you got a lot of people that, uh, you know, it's, it's great to lift in an environment like that. And it sounds kind of, uh, corny in some way, but it becomes a family, you know, and you, you end up with these, this whole other group of people that you really care about.

They really care about you and you get really invested in what they lift, you know? And so you, you went out there and you helped her and you can't do these things on your own. You need someone, you need someone helping you out. Right.

That was my elbow right there. Yeah. I mean, I guess you could do these things on your own. You probably could, but you don't have to. It's a lot funner with people. I mean,

like you don't have to do it all more funnerist. Yeah. I mean, I, I pretty much moved out out to pleasanton to be closer to the gym and uh try to you know get more of my life out there because i mean ever since i've been going to that gym and kind of just following along like my life has gotten better in all areas you know just having the support of all the people there and yeah i mean it's a fun group of people look at how happy both of you guys are after this lift yeah you guys just jesse why does jesse beat the shit out of everybody he just likes to hit you know he just slapped you like five times it hurt too i'm just watching it again you ever see

him slap the shit out of his old coach i fucking love it it's so good it's so good it's so jesse right oh yeah yeah it's fucking awesome ah man i watched that video like a thousand jesse just he hates when somebody just does something that he told him not to do and that's what he told his coach like he told him like way before the lift his coach was like hey you want me to like you know kind of smack some sense in you and jesse's like fuck no don't touch me yep and then his coach smacks him and jesse's like fuck you know, kind of smack some sense in you. And Jesse's like, fuck no, don't touch me. Yep. And then his coach smacks him and Jesse's like, fuck you. And he just kills him. Why does it say miss?

It looked like direct, Jesse had a direct hit here. Yeah. Wow. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Go pick your hat up, sir. That's amazing.

Oh, I could watch this forever. So good. Ted O'Neill getting that bitch slap. I know. Jesse has like the best, like dad mad, you know, he goes dad mad real quick. I'll be like talking to him. We'll be talking about something out of the corner of his eye. He'll see someone doing something stupid and be like, Hey, put that down.

I'm like, he does that when I'm on the phone with him too. He's like yelling at people. Yeah, definitely. His eyes everywhere. He gets, uh, he gets fired up. You know, um, I asked you the question earlier. Um, you know, do you think there's anything that a parent can do, you know, in a situation let's just hypothetically fast forward 10 years and, uh, you got a kid he's, you know,

or, or 15 years, you got a kid that's like a teenager. Um, what would you do in a situation of like kind of finding out you know through somebody or you find something in the room or something like that uh what would you do oh man shit that's a nightmare uh maybe i would try to maybe it's a little too late at that point well i mean definitely i mean it's just i think communication is you know is key you know like i would you know like the make them feel him or her feel comfortable to talk about whatever's going on you know as much as you know they can you know kids are always going to have their own life i think from their parents but if it got worse i mean i think you know just trying to get

out the problem quick you know um whether it's rehab or something along those lines um i, I mean, it's just, I mean, it's just a tough one though. It's hard to know when like kids are young, like, Hey, is this just like a phase? Cause like, like some people kind of, they touch a little bit and then they're done. You know what I mean? So it's, you know, you don't want to like, you know, cause once you send a kid to rehab, it's like a, it's pretty, that in itself is pretty traumatic, not traumatic, but like sucks, you know, but the kid doesn't understand, you know, it's, it's hard that in itself is pretty traumatic not traumatic but like sucks you know but the kid doesn't understand right you know it's hard for kids understand that you know the time they

feel you know i know like i felt like when they sent me to rehab the first time i was like like abandoned or whatever like oh you guys don't want to deal with this or whatever you know stuff like that yeah you just want to kind of push it out on somebody else exactly but i think uh the only thing you can do as a parent in my opinion is know, you have to be careful with how much you protect your child. And you also have to be very conscious of how much your kid is like on their own sort of. And I don't mean you need to be like up their ass all the time. But it's important to try to be present. It's important to try to be around and video games or phones or tablets, um, texting WhatsApp, you know, these different apps they have on their phone. Again, like you don't need to invade their privacy. You don't need to be a lunatic, but you don't want to protect your child so much. The only way you can protect your child is to kind of arm them with the ingredients and the tools to kind of fight through life, you know, to, to fight back against things

that, uh, could potentially harm them. Um, my son asked a lot of questions about marijuana when he was like really young. I mean, he doesn't really, you know, he's, he's 14 now, so whatever. I don't, I have no idea what his exposure to any of that stuff is, but we talked a lot about it then, you know, and I was never like, Hey man, if you do drugs, you're going to be a loser. Like there's never anything like that. Um, I said, you know what? I said, marijuana and a lot of, a lot of the drugs that are out there, like there's reasons

why people do them and people love them. And some people go through their whole life utilizing certain drugs and they enjoy them and they have a good time with them. I said, the hard thing is, is to try to figure out a way to maintain control of it. And I said, control will be a ongoing theme throughout your whole life. You're going to have to try to figure out how to, how to have control over your life, how to have control over you getting places on time. How do you have control over your food, the different foods that you eat, so you're not harming your body and not causing yourself to get sick or have some disease or

whatever. The control is going to be a big factor. And a lot of times these drugs, once you get in deep on them, you tend to lose control. But I said some of the best songs, some of times these drugs, once you get in deep on them, uh, you tend to, to lose control. But I said, some of the best songs, some of the best poetry, some of the best books, uh, in the history of the world have been written because people are high, you know, they're, they got mushrooms going or, or like Eminem. We would not have Eminem without drugs. Like he just wouldn't be the same guy. Right. Yeah. Um,

and a confusing message to try to share with a child, but like, these are things that, uh, that like not everything they do is harmful. There are some positives are some pros to some of these things. They can open up your mind in some ways, but again,

because of the mind altering things that they can do, your mind in some ways but again because of the mind-altering things that they can do maybe perhaps it leads to you saying ah you know i don't know how to face the world without this and that kind of seemed like the spot that you were in yeah it's tough where when kids are young like because like we're talking about it's like the only tool i use one tool for forever and and that one tool is not very effective later in life or it gets less and less effective so being able to and plus when you're like like you know 13 to 20 or however old like your brain's developing so many things are going on and i think to try to leave that as untouched as possible is going to be better you know if you

want to do that stuff wait till later you know there's something i would say you know um because you might potentially have more control over it when you're older you're more mature you can make a decision you can go out with some friends and you can say you know what like i just i want to kind of let my guard down i want to laugh i want to like not be so stressed and so i'm going to have a glass of wine yep exactly. Exactly. You know, stuff like that. Or maybe you get a little high before he, like, I don't think that those things, I, I, I don't, I've never been, yeah, I've never been high in my life. So I don't even, I don't really, well, that's not true. Uh, I've had like Oxycontin and weird shit. Like I've had, I've had painkillers before.

But, uh, yeah, other than that, I, but I learned right away that I love that too much. I'm like, nope, can't mess with that. That was way too ridiculous. I think it was Vicodin that I had. And, uh, I told my brother, I was like, dude, I was like, I, I don't know. I had some, whatever. I had something going on, some sort of pain.

And I just took what was prescribed and I took it for a few days and i was just on fire with like work and just like writing stuff and like just doing stuff for the business and uh i told my brother he's like dude he's like he's like do yourself a favor man just take that and just he's like just fucking flush it all down the toilet your brother's a smart guy he's like, just fucking flush it all down the toilet. Your brother's a smart guy. He's like, he's like, he's like, whatever we have in our, in our body, like in our blood, he's like, that shit's first of all, it's supposed to knock your ass out. He's like, it's not supposed to make you like. Up an ego, get like energy, feel more social. Yeah. Yeah. He's like, he's like, and the people that it does that too.

He's like, usually those are the people that get addicted to that. He's like, just, he's like, just throw that shit away shit away and you know what was the worst thing is i did that and i had withdrawals and i was only on it for like four or five days it wasn't that long i was like wow i was like this is crazy and the withdrawals were minor because it wasn't that many days and i wasn't taking that much of it but i'm like holy shit like if i would have done that for longer or took a little bit more, there might've been no turning back. Yeah.

It's terrible. And it happens a lot with, uh, especially like heroin and opiates and, you know, benzos and alcohol. Those three have such terrible, like physical withdrawals that like,

once you're like, okay, I'm ready to get off the ride now. And it's like, psych, you're on the ride forever now, bitch. Like,

you know, like you try to kick them off and like i remember the last uh my mom like finally they kicked me out of the house so she's like okay you know so i've been using the heroin all the other stuff you know uh and she's like all right you can stay at the house but if you get high one more time like then you gotta go so i tried to like just withdraw the house and i was like throwing up can't sleep you know restless legs end up going to the emergency room and stuff i was like throwing up like all weird colors and shit you know just feeling terrible and finally i was just like pretty

much like talked my mom was like all right i'm gonna leave and she's like we can't come back i was like i know all right well i gotta go so it's just like it's it's tough like i literally i don't know i just got lucky and it's it's just like, it's, it's tough. Like I literally, I don't know. I just got lucky. It's so hard to overcome those. Last time you went to rehab, did you go to like detox first? Um, this one was actually like, they have like a little bit of both there. Um, and I'd been there before too. So I knew the lady that ran it and stuff. So she let me, normally they would have you probably in the state that I was in. so she let me normally they would have you probably in the state that i was in like they'd probably put you in a couple days of detox but let me just

detox there i was like i've been up for like four days or something you know like it's like seeing little like stuff in my what is uh detoxing like so people that are listening can understand a little bit better isn't it kind of like you come off of the things you came off of but it's like under the care of of some people that uh are going to prescribe you maybe some other drugs. To help you get through. To help mitigate some of that, right? Yeah. Because you can die off of certain things, right?

Yeah. Benzos and alcohol you can die from. And then opiates you just wish you were dead. But you won't actually die. So, yeah, like when you're in like the those places they'll help you out a lot like they'll get you know like things to help you sleep you know things to help with the cramps things to help like headaches and dehydration and all that stuff it's it's like doing a weight cut for like a week straight or like two weeks it's terrible uh but uh once you i mean you only got

to do it once if you get through it like you don't got to do it again, you know? So, right. Yeah. So we did that with my brother, Chris, you know? So like, you know, Chris was, uh, Chris was in a bad spot and like, I knew about it kind of on and off from a couple of friends that he had and they were like, Hey man, you know, you should talk to your brother. And I would talk to him, but he was in LA and I'm up here and I'm doing my thing. He's down there doing his own, his own thing.

And, uh, you know, I talked to him here and there and like, I don't know, normally he sounded okay. Yeah. Uh, seemed like things were, were good, but I also know from past history, I know like my brother, Mike, like he was able to serve you up the biggest dish of bullshit in the history of the world and make you think everything was great. Like he was actually magnificent at it. I mean, he could be high as hell and make you seem like everything was perfect. Right. That he was, he was really, really, you know, I guess you just, you learn these things,

um, you know, cause you're addicted to drugs and that's what you want to do. That's what makes you feel the best. And so with Chris, I didn't really know the story. Then I would communicate with his friends more and they'd be like, ah, you know what? Like, seems like he's doing good. And because he'd have these ups and these downs and, and from week to week, he couldn't tell it was going to happen. And, uh, he would go weeks being, um, what seemed to be like totally fine. And, and in talking to him later on, he was totally fine, I guess.

Yeah. But then he would drink and, uh, you know, like he would drink, sometimes he would go and uh you know like he would drink sometimes he would go like three or four weeks without a drink yeah and then he would just boom he would just get like you know hammered to the point where he'd nearly die and he had a you know a couple of episodes like that and then finally uh i got a call from his uh i i did talk to him about it a little bit i was like hey you know everything okay and he's like yeah man he's like you know i was drinking a lot and he's like i kind of you know i cut back and so then he was good for like two months but then i got a call from his girlfriend like in the middle of the night and she was like you know it's your brother and i was like whoa

whoa whoa like what's going on you know because she was like crying i was like holy i'm like don't tell me he's fucking dead i can't handle this and you know having another you know another brother dead you know yeah and so uh you know i kind of talked her through that she was like no he's passed out he's in his apartment and you know i said okay well i need you to you know go inside the apartment make sure he's okay um and uh you know just take you to, you know, go inside the apartment, make sure he's okay. Um, and, uh, you know, just take his keys and, you know, make sure he doesn't try to drive anywhere or whatever. She's like, oh, he's not going to be able to drive anywhere. And I was like, well, just still, you know, make sure he's alive a and B, uh, take his keys so that even if he does at some point, want to go somewhere, he can't hurt himself and that that kind of stuff and so she did all that and i then i talked to my wife and i said you know what like

like with my oldest brother at the time i didn't have like the means to really do anything i didn't have the finances i didn't have i didn't um and also didn't really know what to do like uh his situation was kind of complicated because a lot of times he wouldn't be able to get help until he wouldn't be able to get help for being bipolar until he like came off drugs. Yeah. It's really weird with that stuff. If you're taking other drugs, like they won't prescribe, like, which is like, okay, but you see the problem here. Doctors see the problem here, right doctors? I can see the problem here. Yeah.

Yeah. And it's like, yeah. So for him, it was very complicated on like how to get help, where to go and these different things. Uh, but with Chris, you know, I, I talked to my wife and I said, we got to get them up here right away. And I don't know what we're going to do with them, but let's have like an intervention and then we'll figure out stuff from there.

So we did all that and we had an intervention, but whole time he was here um i don't know if he was still like messed up from then or if he took something but he never remembered any of it like he was like out of it the whole time it was crazy because here we are you know we're a family we're all pouring our heart and soul out and we're all saying all these things where all of us are crying and busted up and you know because a lot of emotions are flying around and and we're telling them like dude like if you need help you need to just tell us if we don't know what's going on and this kind of stuff and the next day you know he i i asked him i was like hey you know like i know like we said a lot of hurtful things but we're all just trying to help you know really just we just want to move forward we want to figure out

how do we move forward from you know the situation and situation. And he's like, yeah, man, he's like, I don't remember anything you guys said yesterday. And I was like, I was so fucking mad. I was like, holy shit. And so at that point I realized I was like, okay, well, I'm not a professional. I don't know anything, you know, and I'm not a professional. and so we called one of our family friends that um was addicted to alcohol and uh she recommended a uh like a place that he could go to like uh detox yeah and so then we sent we sent him there he went there for like seven eight days or something like that and uh he said it fucking sucked and he he hated it, you know, of course. But, you know, it worked.

And then we were able to get him into like a rehab center. And that's ultimately what ended up being the biggest thing. But as a family, you know, we all pulled together and we all did the best we could. I mean, that's probably what it takes to just have a chance. Everybody's got to get everybody. Everybody's got to be on the same page. Everybody's got to kind of like move as like a unit.

Yeah. So I know like when they, we had, my mom hired an interventionist, I guess you call them, to come over and her thing, her whole thing was like, it's more like intervention on the family than like the addict. Right. It's more like, hey, this is what you guys need to do. Because I mean, if you're depending on like the person that's like fucked up to like follow some sort of structure and rules, that's a bad plan. It's about, you know, if they're like, I'm like, that's why it's so important to get

that person to a detox because they're not going to be able to receive any information until they're actually a little bit clear. Yeah. It makes sense. Because they're just someone else. You know what I mean? It's like you like, I'm sure you've like looked at your brother. You're like, that looks like my brother, but his eyes are doing this weird thing and doesn't look like my brother. Yeah.

So you got to like get them online first before you can actually like. Yeah. Yeah, no, it was really scary. What do you recommend to people that might have a family member or might have somebody that, you know, the holidays are coming up and a lot of times we run into, uh, you know, our uncle that's got the problem or sister-in-law or whoever it might be. Um, what, what would you recommend? Like, should you kind of reach out? Should you kind of say like, you know, I always kind of recommend to people like, you know, just really see how people are doing like that. Like, you know, it's one thing to say, Hey, how you doing? That's like a, almost like just a greeting, but to really kind of check in with somebody.

Um, what do you suggest someone should do if they kind of know someone has a problem? I think if you're concerned with somebody, you know, they have a problem. Like, I think like the reaction, I think, and sometimes I'm guilty of this is to be like, Hey, like what's going on? Like this, that, or the other, because you want it fast. But I think the real thing to do is, hey, man, what are you doing Saturday? Let's go hang out. Just hang out.

If there's something wrong with them, they're probably going to bring it up in the four or five hours you guys are hanging out or something. And it's probably they're not going to feel so jumped on maybe. So I think you just hang out with the people that you're concerned about and let it come out more organically I'm not going to mention it to you at the Thanksgiving family gathering they're not going to pour their hearts and souls out to you

like with my little cousins I always try to make time to go see them because I know it's like pretty important good to have positive male people around so I try to always make sure to make time to see them I used to just call them like alright what's going on you're not fucking up, are you? You can't just sit there and run through it.

You actually got to go hang out. What you doing right now, bro? Yeah, pick them up, chill, go get some food, actually have a day together. And then throughout the day, they're going to tell you what's up. So that's probably the best way to go, I think, just spend some time. There you go. What do you got coming up next? Other than battling it out with the manatee

i don't know manatee well we got the uh record breakers oh my god we got the record breakers and then after that i'm going to florida to stephy's uh deadlift thingy there she just got engaged look yeah i know her and hayden what the that's awesome i think they copied andrew andrew got engaged and they just was like oh oh man, we can't be outdone. Hayden does follow me. So he was probably like, ah, fuck, that guy did it. So that means I'm going to have to do it now. Putting the pressure on.

Stealing your shine. Yeah, exactly. Whatever, dude. Like just know who did it first. He couldn't have waited a couple more weeks. It's like when rappers drop an album on the same day. It's like, come on, man. We see you, Hayden. We see you. We see you. It's like when rappers drop an album on the same day. It's like, come on, man. We see you, Hayden.

We see you. We see you. That's messed up. You know, it's funny because in person, he's pretty straightforward, but his posts are always so funny. On Instagram, his posts are hilarious. Yeah, some good ones. They're like, I don't know, like, he has a great sense of humor. I always think it's awesome.

So you're going to go down there and that's a meet as well or did you say seminar? It's just, I think they're just doing like a deadlift exhibition. It's like unsanctioned. That's like mid-December, right? Yeah, mid-December sometime. So that should be fun. I'm just going to shut it down after that and just eat, get big. Retire and ride off into the sunset on Jesse Burdick's back? That's right. That's right. I'll be sitting on top of his head.

Oh, my God. That mega mind head. Mega mind head. You know, start a colony up there. It's a big old dome. How are some of the lifts going getting ready for record breakers? Well, since it was such a short turnaround, the volume has been pretty low. Both the, like like accessory work and

barbell you know just trying to make sure my body is healthy for the day of but it's been going pretty good so far um the last squat day didn't go quite as i wanted but deadlifts are coming along well too so what's uh what's your favorite movie favorite? You look like a comedy guy to me. I like some comedies. All right. Well, since we're on the comedies. Man, favorite movie. It just depends what kind of mood I'm in, I guess.

Also, a favorite movie I've seen lately or recently maybe is. Man. Oh, no. So many movies. I like. well for halloween any scary movies um i like watching the uh freddy krueger movies and stuff around like oh no that's my favorite terrifying yeah haunted my haunted my childhood yeah severely yeah i remember uh freddy krueger that's a tough one to get past. Yeah.

Because it's like he gets you in your sleep. Right. I don't know what he's supposed to do. I'm trying to get some goddamn rest over there. I still have trouble sleeping because of that. You're going to escape that guy. Yeah. There was a dope ass movie that scared the shit out of me.

It was called In the Mouth of Madness. Okay. It was dope. Basically, this author was writing books and he goes to some random town and all his books start coming to life. But it's so dope. It's dope. Basically, this author was writing books, and he goes to some random town, and all his books start coming to life. But it's so dope. It's so sick. If I recommend anybody watch something for Halloween, it's that.

All right. It's fucking dope. I'll check it out. Me and Irene have been watching a lot of Stephen King movies lately, because he had the show Castle Rock. So we watched Stand By Me. That's one of my favorite movies. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Stand By Me? That's a solid movie. How about anything on Netflix right now? On the old Netflix? Stand By Me, that's Stephen King, right? Yeah, Stephen King's like me. Shawshank Redemption, Green Mile, he's got everything, man.

Andy Dufresne? Andy Dufresne, yeah, we watched that recently. Shawshank Redemption. Hey, but Pet Sematary, that's one of my favorite. Oh, yeah. Pet Sematary? That's a creepy my favorite. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Pet Sematary. That's a creepy one.

That's good shit out of me too. You know, my nephew is going as Chucky for Halloween. And he's like five. Hambone? Perfect. He's going to be so scary. Okay, Chucky. I used to have bad dreams about Chucky.

Yeah. I used to, like that one. It's horrifying. That one got me a little bit. He does little like, like little praying things like, I do lay them out. I was like, ah. He's like taking the kid's body. Yeah.

A pet cemetery is terrifying too. Yeah. That cemetery is sweet, man. Yeah. It's really creepy. They're like, oh, I get my dog back. Wait. Yeah.

He's a little different. He's going to be a little different. He's got to go to rehab. You guys have some TV shows you like to watch together? Yeah, we've got some shows we watch together. Game of Thrones, of course, and we're watching Westworld. Right now, we're pretty dry on shows right now. South Park, been getting around on the South Park.

We're watching the South Park together. That's been fun. I like Ozarkark a lot i've been watching that uh with jason bateman right yeah man everybody keeps talking about ozarks it's good it's good and it gets to be craic it just gets to be wild the story just gets to be crazier and crazier and crazier as you start to rifle through some of it i haven't had that much time to uh to get that deep into it yet though green lighted for third season, though. Oh, my God. What about Karate Kid? Is that supposed to be coming back?

Yeah, it's coming back. Have you guys seen the one out of the Cobra Kai? That's what we were doing. Yeah, I saw it. We were just trying to come around. It looks awesome. I was really into that show.

That shit's dope. I've seen a couple episodes. I've got to start to freshen back up on it when it starts to come back. When's it supposed to to come back i'll check right now but i know for sure it was green lighted for a second season because i remember being pretty excited yeah i need to watch a few through yeah somebody mentioned black mirror have you seen any of those black mirrors it's see i like black mirror but i feel weird after i watch that shit it's too trippy it's like puts me in a weird mood i'm like oh man that's terrible yeah makes you like the dating one was gnarly have you seen that i've seen them

all it's just sometimes like some of those shows really do mess with like yeah they really do mess with your emotions or you watch like uh you know some of these like murder mystery shows and stuff like the ones that are real is almost worse yeah yeah they're creepy it just puts a lot of crazy thought yeah that probably shouldn't be there well the the one that's so relatable in black mirror is where like uh basically your credit score is kind of based off of your uh your overall rating based on how many likes you get from people so it's like if you and i have a conversation like dude mark help me with my deadlift five stars yeah and then you know i go to jeremy and he says that my deadlift looked

like shit dude you know what one star motherfucker Jeremy and he says that my dad looked like shit, dude, you know what? One star motherfucker. And then that messes up your overall rating. So when you try to go buy a house or something, they look at your, uh, it's like your Yelp rating. It's like,

Hey, do you got to maintain like an 800 if you want to live in this neighborhood? And it just, there's a girl, you just see all the struggles that she goes through. She goes to the wedding, right? Yeah.

She gets so many down votes she goes to jail. So I'm just thinking like, dude, this is not far off. We're heading there. Yeah, exactly. It's a trip, but that's probably

been my favorite. That show's really... The premises they have in that show are pretty spot on. Yeah. Like, wow, I could kind of see

that happening a little bit. I used to watch that show. I had to download it illegally when it was only like in the UK. Yeah. That's how long I go back. It seems like our twilight zone. It is. Yeah,

it absolutely is. That's the shit. So Jeremy, you nearly died a couple of times, right? Yep. Yep. Yep.

Were you ever actually pronounced dead? Cardiac arrest. Oh my God. Damn. That's, uh, that's pretty crazy. Um, any of the things that, that you have overcome, do any of those things play a factor in, um, in, in your actual lifting? Like, uh, you know, do you ever kind of like go to some of these dark places to, uh, you know, try to draw out a really strong, powerful lift or, or do you just kind of concentrate on the lift itself? Um, I don't know. I kind of just, I don't know.

Sometimes I'll think like, oh man, I'm like so lucky to be here lifting. Like, this is great. You know what I mean? I just, I just try to like think, think of sometimes I try to be more – I try not to go to, like, super dark place and do all that stuff. Yeah. Because I feel like if I get too hyped, if I try to do too much of that, I feel like I miss something, you know? Like, especially with, like, squat. Maybe with the deadlift, you can go a little bit more nuts.

But, like, for – but even there, I try to be more reserved. And if I – when I, like, think about, like, that stuff, I'm just more like, oh, man, hey, like, be grateful to be here. Like, no matter what happens, like, it's good. Like, like you, like this is like extra credit for you. Right. Like you're here lifting weights, like you're in a situation in life where you get to spend, you know, all these hours in the gym working out, you know, you're very lucky. So I kind of just, that stuff kind of keeps me like calm. It's probably a lot more sustainable too. Cause if you walked around the chip on your shoulder, like, you know f that like no one knows my history they don't understand where i came from like that kind of thing like that's a very uh that's exhausting well that's what got me fucked up in the beginning because i did that when i was a kid you know i was just like well if you knew my

history you'd understand why i'm drinking this get the jack daniels before a third period you know and that's how much pain i'm in. Yeah. You know, just like, I don't want to identify with that anymore. You know, like being like a victim and like all that, like, you know,

like feeling sorry for yourself. Shit. So I try to just, you know, just be happy and grateful. And like that usually, you know, try to be in a good mood and try to be,

you know, calm. Sometimes, you know, I like to get a little hyped up more in training and like at a competition, like competition. I don't need more hype. I need the other thing.

I need to like chill. Yeah. Uh, then training sometimes, you know, I need a a competition, like competition, I don't need more hype. I need the other thing. I need to like chill. Yeah. Uh, in training sometimes, you know, I need a little kick. Get aggressive, get fired up. Yeah, definitely. But everyone's a little different, you know, whatever, whatever works for you, whatever,

whatever helps, you know. Yeah. Some people like to go up to the bar and just have total silence and concentrate, right? Yeah. Yeah. It's a little bit different for everybody, you know, so I just try to find somewhere in the middle you know all right that's jeremy avilia strength is never weakness

weakness never strength catch you guys later later