Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast - Ep 343- The Death of Shane Gillis

Episode Date: April 15, 2021

Just a pure/ classic ep. The D.A.W.G.Z. gathered to discuss various topix including weekend rumpus time and the death of Shane Gillis. Thankfully ... he rose again. 

Oh, I just snorted some Zen. Yes. Oh, man. Welcome to the show. Can you do Zen as enough or will it burn? I have no idea. Can you in snuff late in Zen? I'll give it a shot. I'll do some lines of Zen this weekend. I might just do bumps. I might start doing key bumps. Just reach in. Excuse me. Yeah, it's a way to like like nicotine gum for coke. Yeah, snorting Zen. Dude, if you're in a business meeting, you started snorting tobacco. Oh, yeah rush. Oh, I should be like, excuse me. If your assistant came in with like, did you ever see those like those horns? They pack them up with tobacco and go and blow it up your nose. Yes. Yeah, dude. If it was that. I wasn't sure what that was. Um, look, dude, let's just get right into it. You want to get in the heart of that?

Look, man, I've gone through PR disasters before. None like this. None like this. Absolute PR disaster. This is a nightmare, dude. Oh my God. We've had like a 72 hour war. And the news, the news broke at the worst possible. I know. I know. All right. So for those of you who are unfamiliar. Yes. I promised Billy that I would go paintballing at Matt's bachelor party. Yes. And I made it very clear that I did not trust anybody there with a paintball gun and myself. Now, will I say that factored into my decision? Yes. Slightly. I had no idea what paintballing was when I got there. Yeah, I realized that would have never been the case. However. This is tough. Take your time, dude. Take your time. I just let so many people down.

I had no idea how important it was to everybody. I had no idea how important it was to me. Yeah, I called Matt. I got on Reddit the next morning and called Matt and I was like, dude, I'm so sorry. Like I did I like let you down? He was like, no, what are you talking about? Then I called spot. I was like, dude, am I fucking gay? So yes, guys, your Reddit comments do affect me. They hurt my fucking feeling. That was funny. I was driving home. Well, first of all, the whole weekend has to be recounted to give it proper to give it proper content. I do believe somewhat of a framing device. I do have a decent alibi. My Friday was a very strong alibi. Well, first of all, start with the penis you saw.

You didn't ask to see a human monk as me. Dude, I had. You should put a tin foil blanket around yourself. I had nothing but trauma this weekend. You did. First night. First starting from the very beginning. First night we get there. A lot of. Yeah. So I go me. Spud. Six. I think Tom. I think Tom stayed. Or Kev. Kev can't get Kev Kev for sure went. We went to the bar. I think butterly maybe butterly. I don't know. Rainy. That's right. Yeah. Go to the bar. We're hanging out. We're hitting the Irish car bombs. We're having fun. It was only you only had 35 minutes before it closed. Yeah, we had to get in and

I was a little slow on the grill. I was we're making burgers. I was taking my good old saying my good old. So I walk in spuds, spuds peeing in the stall. I walk into the bathroom. I walk in after Spud is already his stream is already in motion. He was going to go to the urinal, but he chose to go to urinal for good reason. The reason was which I immediately discovered upon entry was there was a guy at the stall. There was two urinals. This guy's dong. I don't know how to. Can you hold up? I mean, bigger than this. Seriously, soft. No joke. Soft dong. You're serious. Bigger than that water bottle with a tip that was a zin. And how many ounces? What? It was a zin sized. How many ounces is that water bottle for the people at home?

This is a 16.9 fluid ounce bottle. 16 ounces of dong. Yeah. With a zin top. With a zin tip, dude. I walked in. Soft. I walked in, caught it. I was walking in straight, caught it over here. I could see it. I could see it from there. Caught a glimpse. That's evolution, by the way. That's not your fault. Nothing I could do. Caught a glimpse. It jarred me. It was, I was, I responded like a black guy singing magic trick. I immediately ran into the stall with Spud while he was peeing and hugged him. Yeah. And just went, oh my God. He was shaking already, dude. This penis already had the Spud man like, oh dude, I know, I know. Spud was shook. Yeah. And then I went to the urinal and started to shake the Spud man too. Bro, I went and started trying to piss

next to this bohemus. So you, you faced it. I teenaged it. You ever see those drawings? You David and Glyde. You ever see those drawings of like a dragon and like a knight? Like a tiny, that was my teenage, dude, to guess this thing. So you faced it. I did. The guy finished and then Spud was still in there. I was curious. Guys, it takes that big. Do they even shake or what do they do? It was, it was a blur at that point. Yeah, exactly. It was a blur, dude. I was just smacks the side of the urinal with it. Like boom, dude. So he leaves and he's washing his dick in the sink. Spud didn't know like another guy walked in. Yeah. Cause he was still in the stall. Yeah. So this other guy walks in and I'm in there and I was like, dude, dude. Spud was like,

yo, you see that guy's dick? And then I left and apparently Spud kept talking to that dude. Oh my God. So we get back to the table and Spud runs out. He starts, he immediately, he paul reveres this stick. He ran out to everybody. And he's also good for talking very loudly about a thing. Oh yeah. You know, and we had just drank a couple shots and we were feeling it. We all sit down, me and Spud loudly talking about how we just saw the biggest stick of all time. Literally, we know the guy was just sitting like from us to the camera. He was that close. He turned around and looked at us. He was furious. Yeah, he was human. Dude, I was working with Spud one time. We're in a house and we're just, you know, we're just stripping. This is a long time

ago. We're using like a, not even an acid, a base to strip old paint. And it's like really shit. Like if it gets into your foot, we'll just start like melding your skin. We're just melding. We're doing all the stuff, scraping it down and like into like a weird sludge. And we're in someone's house and he's just like going on. I forget exactly what he was talking about, but it was like off the wall. Like, you know, it was just some like crazy porn stuff of like, he's just like, and then he's going on full fucking full speed about like, it might, I mean, again, I, I'm not slurring them, but it like, it'll be like if I was in your parents' house talking about like M to F, no, F to M like trans and just being like, wow, as loud as I possibly

could. And I stopped and I'm like, dude, I think they can hear you. And he's like, so what? Look at what we're working with. Who the fuck do you think works with this stuff? They know the deal. All right, I guess. He's like, we're using a corrosive base on old paint, dude. Who do they think does he is the funniest, dude, ever. Me and him rarely get to chill. Oh, dude, like I'll talk to him on the phone. You don't get to see his face on the phone. When you see his face and he's, he's, he's got a stare that he's not looking at you. Like the second day I was like, are we good? Like, are you mad at me? He's like, yeah, we're fine. Dude, I worked with him every day for like, I'm thinking, I'm bad with time frames. I think it

was like two years. Funnest thing in the world. Yeah. So funny. I picked up by the Spudman daily and just go out and just crush painting jobs. It is so fucking fun. He's, he's the funniest. So we get, we go to the bar, we talked on for a while. So the dude was, the dude's been discovered. You guys blew his covers. He was upset. He was pissed. Yeah, because I, he heard me saying it was, it's a, it's bad. Oh, you said it was deformed. I think it was a problem. I think it was a medical issue. There's, yeah, there's no explanation other than that. So he heard you saying his huge dick was deformed at while he was trying to enjoy himself at shenanigans club. He was just at shenanigans getting his last drink of the night in. About the day came in his big dick home.

Then we all went back to the place. The non-drinkers were chilling. They were like, all right, it's bedtime. We got a big day tomorrow. Yeah. And then me and the boys decided to go to a gentleman's club. Yep. To the pleasure dome. Open till four. Open till four a.m. pleasure dome. Yeah. Someone hit me with the opportunity to go. B-Y-O-B. 145. I was like, I, I suggested against you going. I had a hard day at battle. Once they, once they find out you're a bachelor at a strip club. Yeah. In fact, they did do it to one guy and they used Beezer's belt to like whip a guy on stage. Did they really? Yeah. Yeah, I would have came out of an embarrassment. It would have been cheating at that point. Oh my God. I would have, I would, that there's nothing

I would fear more than getting brought onto a stripper stage to get like whipped in front of your friends. Oh my God. Yeah, I mean it. Yeah, I don't know. That bothers me. It's always bothered. Does it? Yeah. I would have never, ever. I've seen other people do it. I've been like, I feel bad. So I was at, I forget who's bachelor party this was, but we slipped them like a couple extra bucks to be like, beat the fuck out of them. I don't know if you ever gave like a known intravenous drug use an extra 50. Yeah. I mean, these girls, a lot of them like to spend money on drugs. You hit them with an extra 50 and you're like, yo, there's another 50 after that. If you fucking beat the shit out of them, dude, it was like fucked up what they did.

What'd they do? They just beat the fuck out of them. Like, dude, hit them in the nuts and shit. It was fucked up. It was fucked up. It's, uh, so we get there. This was my favorite part. So it was me, me, bodily, rainy, Beezer spot. Yeah. I think. Oh, and I think Kev, maybe I'm wrong on that. I think you're wrong. Maybe you want to know. It was somebody. Yeah. I don't know why I'm naming everybody. What's the pleasure dome? So we're in the pleasure. It was just you. It was just myself. And, uh, dude, I got, I bawled out. I was very excited. I got $200 in one. They give you those two stacks. Fuck. So I was just instantly like, like, then the strippers, I mean, they swarmed, they saw it swarmed. They're sitting there on me and

spotters sitting next to each other. There's a stripper's butthole right here. Nice. I fucking pied the spot, dude. Pied him back of the head into the bottom. You moved by them. He was like, I'm not going to complain. Yeah. It was the grossest butt ever, dude. I would have been so mad. You didn't care? Yeah. It was a disgusting stripper ass. How would you? With a butt plug. What? Wait, wait, wait, wait. They all had plugs in. They had butt plugs in? Yeah. Like, enough that I had to like point it out to Rainey. I was like, dude, you see that? They all have plugs in. He's like, oh, wow. Do you think that's to keep? He's like, I've never seen that. Wow. That's a hilarious sense of reaction. Well, he was sober too. He was sober. It was interesting.

It was BYOB. So all we had, we had it like one more. Was that like a sanitary thing? Just in case they sharded? I have no idea what it was. Coke's cut with laxative a lot of times. So that might just be a prevention. It might be a COVID prevention. How dare you assume that these sex workers are doing narcotics? A lot, dude. I'm just, I'm doing. I mean, they all getting pod. They're getting moon pod by far. Did he go up against the plug? He must have hit his face on plug. On the plug? Yeah. I actually think he hit tailbone. I think he went like forehead to tailbone on this thing. Perfect. But yeah, it was, what a great night. I would leave because then you had to stop drinking. Yeah. So we all had to chug our white claws as fast as possible. Now the

parking lot. And then I would go out to the parking lot to chug a white claw as fast as I could. Beezer's out there too. Beezer made friends. Beezer made, yeah. He was outside slugging Hennessy. He was parking lot pimping, dude. He was out there just, yeah. He was slugging Hennessy. Beezer's outside slugging Hennessy was like two 30 year old Black Teas. Yeah. They were like, yo, take this. And it's like, I don't think they understood who they gave the alcohol to. The Beezer probably just absolutely dead on their Hennessy. They was this fucking gay shit. They probably thought they were going to punk the Beez. But yo, here, drink this. Beez grabbed the H-Rock, dude. They passed Beez the H-Rock, dude. He probably just drained it.

I'm, Beez put in work on Friday. So all that happens where if Beez takes Mali, his face turns like, it's like totally pale. It's the craziest thing. You won't, you won't see him for like 20, you know, like an hour. Then all of a sudden Beezer will walk back in with like headphones in and it'll be like, yo. And his face is just, he looks gray. He's like, yo, it's all, it's like, oh my God, dude. I mean, he really might be, he might be like the, the patron, Santa Broski. He's dying. Soon, dude. Soon, bro. So. He was so fucking funny all week. Oh my God, dude. Well, it's so funny how he gets so pleasant on Mali too. I mean, he's not like a dickhead by any means, but when he gets drunk, he gets kind of fired up.

Yeah. But Mali, he's like, hey, what's up, man? Yeah, he's very chill. Yo, what's up, dude? Yeah. It's not like a dick. It's whatever it is. No, but he's still fantastic. So, all right. I'm not going to name names. True, true. But I'll be honest. When we got back on Friday night, somebody was like, yo, I have DMT. Yes. Now, at this point, I am very drunk. I would have, I should have never done this. First of all, it's what, 430? Yeah, this is about 4am. Yeah. And that was when we decided to rip as much DMT as possible,

as if it was weed. Yeah. Just kept passing. Three man rotation. Dude, it was, I think because of all the alcohol and stuff, I didn't, I didn't blast off as hard, but it was like, it felt bad. I felt bad. I felt like I was doing, you know, I was doing hard drugs, but like, I was like, this is what like doing. Well, you were doing DMT like hard. You guys smoke it like crack. Yeah. Someone, someone was telling me that you like, it would, you guys would all rip it once and then party for like four minutes. For like five minutes, really? And then go back. They would wear off and be like, all right, we should chill. It's like, all right, let's do one

morning. And one guy, I'm not going to name names. He was like, yeah, give me that. And he just ripped it. The theories were confirmed. The theories were, it's like, I've never done that stuff. We have one friend we suspected of being a DMT addict, dude. He showed his fucking ass, dude. I've never seen anything like it. He's a gremlin. He gremled out. It is what it is. And spaz, dude. He was spazzing on DMT. I'm going to fuck it away. Yeah. So what the fuck? Now, I don't want to make an excuse,

but that, that led me to, I woke up, hold on, dong strip club, lots of alcohol, DMT until about five, five in the morning, maybe six, about a night. Everyone else is milling around about nine o'clock in the morning, nine a.m. I started hearing people. I didn't wake up until somebody knocked on my door at like 1130 and they were like, we got to go. And I was just like, zero chance. I tried, dude. I sat there for a minute and I was like, all right, I can do this. And then I was like, actually, I have to shit. I was like, this is going to be a half hour. You guys go ahead. And I got, I mean, I got there like maybe an hour late. I had no idea how long that would take.

You were also an hour late too. Like if we didn't start at that time, it would have started to kind of get fucked up because it was, we were like, it closed at five. So we had like a two and a half, two and a half hours seemed like, I mean, it was war, dude. Yeah, I saw it. It was war. That was crazy. I've never seen people. Dude, that was nuts. Fucking nuts. Yeah. So first of all, so yeah. So we, so you were recovering, dude, you had dysentery. You call dysentery at the camp. I did at the camp. Yeah, it happens. Happens. Her endless case of DMT induced dysentery.

So we go out, we got there like late because it closed at five. And I think we got there like, I don't know, I forget two or so, but it took us, we got there. We left early. We started rallying everyone around that time. I will say this also, totally sober awake at the time. I still would have not wanted to do that. Yeah, it was intense. When I got there and saw it in the first game, I was like, fuck, I fucked up. This looks awesome. Yeah. By the third game, I was like, thank Christ, dude, I'm not doing this shit. I'm going to find a picture of my back, dude. I'm going to try to, oh my God, hold it for the boys so they can say it's, it's jacked up. Yeah. Then you guys all came back like, dude, showing welts and shit. Like contusions.

What the fuck is this, dude? That's the back. Let me bring up that screen a little bit there. Let me bring up that screen a little bit there. That's the back, dude. Freeze for that. You see that? Yeah. Dude. I saw it live. I saw it happen. That was, that was the last battle. Those pretty switched teams. Yeah. So we show up there, the teams were, I don't know what they're, the guys there, by the way, were chill as fuck. They were so cool. But they made these teams, I think it was just the fact that like these people came and they were already together, you know, and we just came. So we show up and it's like, you know, 12 of us, it's like, you know, a good amount of the men in my family, a lot of fucking just animals, dude.

Yeah. Then like, you know, obviously we have like, dude, how tall is Pat? Like six, nine? No, he's six, five, six, six. No, he can't be six. He's six, six, six, six. Really? Oh, shit. Yeah. Pat's six. So like, we had, we had some fucking nasty war. Yeah, we had some monsters. Yeah. And then it just so happens, it was like about 11 or 12 of us. And then there's like 12 black dudes that show up. We're on the same team versus this is just the fact. Office workers. Fat lesbians. Yes. A couple of office workers, tow truck drivers, which I found out and I said, okay, no fucking mercy. Yeah. And then there was a couple of Latino father, son duos. That's approved, dude. There was, there's women and children. I got there. I couldn't,

I couldn't believe the mismatch. It was crazy. The pink team was the exact group you would not want to face. It was cool black dudes and Navy SEALs. Yeah. I'm not sure how else to describe. I would say, yeah, you can describe our squad pretty accurately, dude. Versus, yeah, just like, dude, like the, like there was like pink haired, fat lesbians, children. Yeah. You know, obviously there's a couple of Latino fathers. They fought hard. They perished in front of me. I fucking lit the box. You executed the Latinx. He was with his son. He's with his son. And I was conflicted. And I said, you know, you get the bullets firing at you. You say, you're all right. Yeah, what happened there? You executed a guy in the first game.

Well, no, no, that was, that was almost the first game. I was storming shelters. So people, people, this is how nasty we were playing. Cause they, you know, they were just kind of high behind shit. I was going and actively like finding where they're at and hitting them point blank. I'd run up and say surrender. If they didn't say anything back, I would hit them point blank. I was fucking people up to you. So I had my boy Dell G was laying cover fire. Dell G is just, he was shooting six inches over my head. So anywhere I was standing, it would there's be a line of fire coming right over me. So I would run up on people. The first time they pulled the whistle, I went, I went like that gunpoint and the dude went and the ref was

right. He was like, no, no, no, it's over. I was like, bro, you're fucking lucky. Yeah. The next round is the same exact thing, obviously. So I stormed around the perimeter. I cut in on someone and I was like, dude, surrender. And I just went bam and shot him in the head in his mask. Obviously. Yeah. You fucking shot me back. First of all, which is bullshit. You would have wiped it right off. You would have done the same. True. Actually, somebody point blank shot in the face. Well, it was like five feet. It was right in front of the ref. Yeah. So right in the ref was like, hey, hey, 10 foot rule. And I was like, I guess I have to offer them surrender then I went right up to was like surrender. And he was like, I want to pop and just fucking nail them, dude.

The rest of that time, then there was like, so I, you know, that was just one part of it. First of all, I was wiping paint constantly. I would get hit and just be like, yeah, because I'm not paying money to go sit on this. You have to make me surrender. I'm not going to get hit. I'm not going to get winged and go out of battle. It's like, dude, that's just one arm down then, dude. So I, at one point I'm sitting there and I started like Rambo and going off alone a lot. So I see there's, you know, yeah, you guys had a whole team of, there was probably about five of you that were Rambo now. A lot of us were. Yeah. It was definitely cheating. Well, you know, again, there was somebody was wiping their face. There was one time.

You're like, man, we killed those guys. It's like, yeah, you guys all cheated. I want you would hit them and they would, they would go, I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. You don't go out and paint ball unless you get fucking hit. That's the ref sees you. Exactly. I would even argue with the ref. There's a couple of times where do I paint? I have paint all over me where he'd be like, whatever, dude, just fucking go ahead and do it at one point. People would start doing a thing where they'd hold their hands out and shoot and I would just start shooting. You know, you're going to eventually line up and aim it. So you hit them right in their trigger. You hit them right in the hand, hit, took a Latino dad out that way,

fucking popped them in the hand like three times. He surrendered and I saw his boy and I was like, I'm going to let you live and he sent it sent a couple of my way and I said, all right, lit his fucking ass up and I'm, you know, I'm 10 feet. I'm 10 foot rule. But dude, I was, so I'm like just absolutely being a jerk, dude. Like just again, the whole operation was go lay cover fire, move to another thing. These people were just like sitting there like, huh, I would go and just try to get the angle on them. So I would shoot, shoot, shoot. They would go down. I would just book it, go to another location that you'd see them like pop up and look around and I'd have a direct line on them from the side.

But let off like 20 shots, dude. And they were just all going, I'm done. Like it was full of surrender. Dude, it was so when I got there, but they switched, they switched me that that plays skirmish. That place is sick. So fucking sick. I got there. I was like, holy shit. This is like legit. It was like fucking call duty levels. Yeah. Do you know they reenact a D day once a year? Really? They do a thing where they have it's like, I don't know if it's thousands of people, but it's hundreds and they reenact storming Normandy. You can either be the Germans or there's a heavy demand to be the Germans. The Germans won last year. I watched one of it. They won. They won the it's so funny. A lot of dudes there that

chill dude. Yeah, I got there pulled up. I was hurting and I heard dudes like screaming in shipping containers. Yeah. I was just like, Oh my God, thank God. It's it. That hung over the lid up in the ship. Yeah, I look, I understand. I understand the criticisms. I mean, I'm sticking my gun down. I'll make that. I'll make that exact decision 10 out of 10 times. Yeah, it's your chance. You're living your life. We needed you as a general back there. I was back. I was I was supporting the best I could. I was motivating Bill. Bill was fun to watch. You were firing him up big time. He was showing off for me. He would run over to where I was standing

and do like the sign of the cross at me and point and run straight across the battle. It's so funny. Oh my God. Well, dude, when I was on my team, I was like, these things don't even hurt because they weren't really hitting me. They were just, you know, they weren't really hitting me that much. And so we fucking switched our teams. So then they put me on the fat lesbian tow truck driver team with a couple of other people and dude, I felt what I had been doing. I was getting a fucking annihilate. Dude, I one point I got hit in the side of the head and like all stars. And I was just fully that was the only time I was like, take me out. I'm done. Take me out. I'll be back in the next game. But dude, there was a, I got fucked up, man. Yeah,

dudes were getting rocked in the head the whole time. My fucking hand, dude. My hand still hurt. I got hit. My trigger finger kept getting crushed. But yeah. So I went on the other team and fully tasted what I had been doing to people. I mean, I'd still do it again. Obviously it was battle, but dude, it was that shit. I mean, you had to do it. Then they made me run the gauntlet. Apparently they're like, I knew that was coming. You're the bachelor. So they made me run while my whole team fired on me. Yeah. And you know, obviously they told West to come too. So me and West, I tried to charge and shoot. Bro, as soon as they were like, who's the best man, I got out of the woods. I got out of the way. I was like, dude, I'm not coming near this fucking thing.

That fucked that. That hurt me. And then the last, last game, we're in this thing, the castle. And then our team combined with the tow truck drivers, the black dudes who were on our team, all of us combined, we were playing against each other. Left before that against two other squads. I didn't get to see this. Dude, we stormed this castle and that was, did the castle one? Yeah, dude. That was at the very end. So we're, you're in a castle, dude. And there's this wall and wall. Someone could be like, you're talking about getting point blank. You don't know what the fuck's going on. There's like nine different colors. It was fucked up. So we were storming the castle. We're actually doing pretty well. And I'm leading the front. I'm fucking like, you know,

I'm going out, blah, blah, blah, going, gaining territory. And all of a sudden you'll like, you know, go from thing to thing. All of a sudden I start like, you know, you'll see bullets coming one way and you're like, I shot fire back. When they're coming from like three or four directions, you're going, oh no. Like I'm in a bad spot. Let me get out of here. So I go, I'm laying, it's like the end of it too. So I was, I was shooting the entire time. So I was trying to use all my paint. So I'm like, Contra, you know, just, I had the ass spread, dude. I was just, blah, blah, blah, blah, the whole time I'm even looking at shit. My trigger's going. So I'm like, I gotta get, I'm getting hit. I gotta get the fuck out of here. So I just break to go back to where

all my boys were. I'm like, if I zigzag, they won't hit me. Someone must have had a fucking line on me, dude. Cause it was, I'm running for like 10 straight, 10 straight seconds. Someone hit me. It was like, dunk, dunk, dunk every step. I'm like, oh, got absolutely annihilated. And then finally got hit in the back. That was, yeah, that was just after I got hit in the back from doing the other things. Coward's death. Yeah, dude. Big time. So then I keep shooting, I keep shooting. Then we go back in and I have, I had already gotten hit directly in the face like four times on my visor. So I'm like, why been paying? I can't see fucking anything. So at this point, I'm just a, you know, I'm, I'm like in the call of duty when like the world goes gray.

I would see people. I'm like, I don't know if you're on my team at the top of the castle. I'm just shooting them like, dude, this is it. Shooting everyone. The ref just turns. He's like, dude, you're fucking out. I'm like, what? He's like, I'm like, where? Every time. Where? And they're like, it's literally, you have four hits on your face. And I was like, take me out, bro. Yeah. Had a walk like this. I, I just wanted to use up all my paint. Yeah. Most fun I've ever had. The second to last one was Billy and a couple, I think Spud or somebody, they were all against this side of this shipping container. So I could see them and the whole time that the shit doesn't hurt.

This shit doesn't hurt. Dude, somebody, I think it was Kev fucking just lit. They looked like an execution. They were against the wall. They were screaming and like high stepping. I did. Yeah, that was, it was fun to watch. It was fun to watch. Fucking hurts, dude. I, I've heard the first couple of my, this doesn't even hurt. And so I started getting real bold when they switched teams with me. When I switched teams, I started tasting the wrath there and it was like, this fucking sucks. It was fun. Either way, I had a blast. Yeah. I'm dead. I might get into competitive paintball. You should. I might, dude. Yeah. It's so fun. I was the most fun. That'd be sick. Yeah.

If I had a competitive paintball, we should sponsor a fucking competitive paintball team. No, we shouldn't. I want to do it. I want to sponsor myself. But yeah, that was, it was fun to watch. I've also fully respected your decision, dude. Oh, I don't, I've, dude, that was, that's crazy time. I've grown past it. That was funny too. And I was just like, dude, your brain was just out of the good stuff. You were unable to produce like reassuring thoughts. You used up all the fluid. Your, your brain was completely devoid of serotonin. Oh my God. You had no serotonin. You have a major PR storm on your hands. Huge PR storm. Yeah, dude. I mean, dude, Prince, what was the one Prince Andrew?

I was getting DMs from dudes that were like, you better fucking get a hold of this, dude. Everyone's calling you a pussy. Yeah, dude. For not going to paintball. You know, I was like, Prince Andrew was probably like, yeah, it's fine. Jesus. Finally. Someone else is taking the tensions off of me. That was the guy who was chilling with Epstein, right? I think so. I think it was Andrew. He was bad Andy, dude. So after paintball and we get back, yeah, fellas are resting up. Yeah. Licking our wounds. We start cracking them, start drinking a little, start having fun. Yeah. We went, I think we went to another bar. Oh yeah, we went to that lake

or that, uh, Knicks. Knicks. Yeah, that was fun. Get back. That's when we start doing drugs. Yeah. Well, the drinking, first of all, don't downplay at the bar. The bar and I'm like sitting there, you know, I was sitting there chilling, smoking my weed. So I'm sitting there. I'm observing. I'm seeing people just drinking like, like people at that, we were there for what? You guys were there a little longer, but I was watching a couple of people who got there and it was just like a full nice worth of drinking in the span of an hour and a half easily. Like, you know, nine, 10 drinks. So everyone, so alcohol had been done. Everyone did alcohol. Yeah, we did alcohol.

And then you came back. Yeah. And then we decided to try other drugs. Tiestoed. We mullied. Yeah. A couple of us, no names. Majority. Majority. And it was great. And it was going very well. For some reason, the first one I took and a couple of people took where they felt like duds after like an hour and a half. It was like, these aren't working like they usually do. We should take more. Yeah. Which we did. And they worked. Yes. And then we were, and we were off. And then this is where things on this trip, you guys thought that was a PR nightmare? Yeah. It's nothing compared to the trauma I was about to experience. The mushrooms came out. Then a giant bag of mushrooms was laid

upon the bar. Yeah. Just laid out. Yeah. It's like, this is for anybody. And I had already taken quite a lot of Molly at this point. And I decided it was time for me to start eating handfuls of mushrooms. And at first it was great. Sure. At first it was wonderful. Switching between the Molly and into just hallucinations seemed great. It was very fun. And then things took an incredibly dark turn. Yep. And I couldn't see or hear for several hours. Yep. You blacked out. Or move. Yeah. I did. Yeah, I did. I did pretty much black out. Mushrooms will black you out. Yeah. Especially that much. They immobilized me. Bro, it was like it started. I think I was still chatting with you when it started. I had six eyes. Yeah,

you had six eyes. Everybody had multiple eyes. Everyone had multiple faces and shit. I was here people were telling me I was getting the reports from everyone the next day. And like dude, like I think Spud had like six. He had like four faces and one. I was watching people communicate telepathically. You know, I just thought that too. It was very fucking funny to walk in on. You're lucky. You're lucky you didn't do it. Yeah. I know you said you. Yeah. Yeah. I have. That was bad. I have my five grammer coming up in a week basically. That was a bad way. Let me just let me chill. I should have never done that. No, you should have. That was important. You did that. In hindsight, I'm like, that was cool. But at the time that was legit the worst

thing I've ever experienced. Dude, I was telling you, man, you went into it like it was literally cold of Dionysus that just got absolutely stormed by medieval Catholicism. You guys were it was drinking. It was Molly and all of a sudden it was just like it's time to examine everything. Yeah, dude. How about some trauma? You want to relive that a thousand times like it's brand new every time for five hours? Which is funny too, because that's like a really effective form of therapy. That works. Exposure therapy. That's how you move a thing from your amygdala down to the area of like where things have been processed and they don't affect your biology. Yeah, it was pretty crazy. There was some things that apparently were a little more

traumatic than I originally thought. Yeah. And they came back. Yeah, quite a bit. Yeah, man. And every time I'd be like, did that happen? Oh, fuck. And then a minute later, I'd be like, Oh, fuck, did that happen? Just over and over again. And then I'd forget about it and keep going. We were sitting out by this fire. Every single thing somebody said it the way my brain was processing it. It felt like they had just said it a minute before. So like if you were like, Hey, what's up, man? It would have felt like you said it twice. You pierced the veil. And I just be like, what? Yeah, you pierced the space. Dude, I couldn't process one thing. And apparently I was just sitting there by this fire. I was like, Yeah, I'd like look up out of my hat and be like,

What? I couldn't move for five hours. I was like, What? Holy shit. It was terrible. Then I Haas was sitting there. Haas. Yeah. What fucked me? Matt's cousin Haas is a absolute demon. Yeah. Complete gargoyle. Yeah, you told him. He sat down. I was like, dude, you're the worst. He had faulted. He had faulted. He had faulted earlier. And he rebuilt himself. Yeah. I was there for him rebuilding himself. So I was there with him. When he was faltering, I was chilling out by the fire to shoot in the breeze with them. And he rebuilt himself back up to his former glory. And then just saw you and just like, What's wrong with him? I do think he was trying to help you. It was just, he was just haulsing. He just regained Haas powers, dude. And he couldn't

help not hauls out on you. And those Haas powers are while you're, while you're in the nether realm. Entire. So you were sitting there, you're chilling and haulsing. Spodman was to my left, and he was giving me all the support he could. He knew. Yeah. He could see me and he'd be like, Shane, you're the man. You're the man. I'd just be like, What? Guys, I'm blind. I can't see. It was, and the one they'd be talking and it would just be gibberish. I couldn't understand. And then I was just staring at the fire. It was, it was very cool. Like the hallucinations were awesome. That's why I'm wearing tie dye now. Obviously. Shit. It's funny. You went and busted

out your one tie dye. It's Notre Dame. Sweet. You have a Notre Dame shirt for every type of a shirt. Yeah, for every, yeah. Every mood I'm in. But yeah. And then I finally, I'll just fast forward, mustered the strength to, to stand. And I was like, All right, I'm going to bed. Even when I did that, Hoss was like, Are you actually this time? And I was like, What? I must have said it a thousand times. Like, I got to go to bed. So I go in, I lay down. This is, this is where the worst one happened. Yeah. I was laying in bed. You saw a shelter. That's a reflex that happens. Dude. You eventually are like, Can I just go like encase myself in a. It was like. That's where it kicked off.

Fully clothed. Yeah. Shoes on probably just laying on top of this bed with my feet hanging off of it, like face down. And I started hallucinating that I was dying. Yeah. Of, I presume a drug overdose. That's what I think it was. Yeah. And like, I could see it. It was just totally real. Like it was like, my friends were around me at first while I was laying there, like a dead dying on the ground. Like I saw Beezer being like, What the fuck, dude? This is fucked up, dude. And I was like, And then I would die. Like I would leave and I would go to heaven or something. Yeah. Where Phil was for some reason. My dad was there. Yeah. I was like, Dad, I love you. It was like that. And then I would get

shot back to dying with like EMTs, like shining lights into my eyes and like, Shane, are you there? Like trying to resuscitate me. It fucking sucked ass, dude. How long was that for? I have no idea. I don't know if even time even applies. I swear to God, I have no idea. But it felt like forever. It was all night. You lived out a potential like deviation in your potential. I mean, you have an infinite amount of timelines, but you went and visited one of them. Yeah. It was a sad time. You did the ghost of fentanyl past. I did. Yes. I did the ghost of cocaine future, dude. And I have done with drugs for a long time.

Damn, dude. I was offered drugs last night. I said, Get that junk out of here, dude. I said, I've been there, done that. No. I've died and come back. I have died on the third day I rose. Whoa, dude. I'm risen. Dude. That's fucking awesome. It was. Yeah, it was terrible. I can't see what I can't wait to see what the mushroom demon show me, dude. I'm going to get rocked. I'm doing five grams total silence. I have to, dude. I know you do. I know you do. And you're going to, you're going to enjoy it.

You're going to enjoy it. It's going to be, if it's anything like I just did, it's going to suck. I mean, especially you did under, it will, it will be difficult for sure. But like, dude, that's the God that's horrible. I wasn't prepared. I wasn't mentally prepared at all for that. I was on Molly, just like, everything's this shit. Dude, everything's the best. I love all you guys so much. And then just like a fucking switch. It was just like, you're a fag. I was like, what? It's crazy. But this made me laugh. Like, even when I was like,

in the darkest realms of this shit, like, couldn't see. Could like anything I looked at was just squiggles and hallucinating. Everyone's while buttery would talk and he was using this like, yeah, man, everything's great. Like this real monotone thing. And something deep inside me like while I was out would be like, yeah, that's just so gay. Still in me. I was like, I'd be like, that's so gay. It was fucking crazy. Damn. Yeah. Then I passed away, came back, woke up to everyone leaving. It was raining.

Oh, yeah. Oh, God. Yeah. It was the saddest day. It was the worst day. It was like a gloomy cold rain. Dead trees because we're still in the mountains. Cleaning up shit. Everyone cleaning, just laying there. One thing was funny. I looked at Billy because Billy was like, looking at me like, holy shit, dude. How are you? And I was like, that's what I call a party.

Like waking up from hallucinating and dying and be like, hell, yeah, that rule. Sick party. That was white claw Billy, too. That was white claw Billy. That was so fun. White claw Billy was. White claw Billy rules. So funny. He needs to start drinking often. Dude.

He's the best. It's so funny. And then so, he comes so aggro in a way that's so funny. Yeah, it's great. It's too funny, man. It was a. He made a wedding. It's funny. The only time he drinks is at a wedding.

Can't wait. Dude, it's so funny. He just picks on. He finds like one person and just absolutely devastates them the entire night. So funny. So funny. He had horse in the crosshairs. He might have been the funniest. He made the horse turn his hat back around.

Dude. Twice. Well, horse fucking picked on weed tincture. So he was picked on. He was. That's what I was making fun of. I was I because before I picked on the mushrooms, I was making fun of him.

I was like, you picked out on the tinctures. An hour later, I was like, picked out. Picked and Billy would see him and just be like, that's not the one dude. Yes. He owned him at one point. It was like full MK ultra. He owned him.

Mind, body and soul. He told him to turn his head around. He did it. He did it three times and he just go, that's fucking D3 bullshit, dude. Yeah. Turning around, he'd be like, dude, and he'd wait like 10 minutes.

Like, yo, we're boys, right? Yeah, every single time. Yo, we're fucking boys, right? And he'd be like, stop, go away from me. And he'd be like, yo, I'm just going to tell you this straight up, dude. You're more of a party guy. Spin that thing back around.

He would just be like, it was the fucking funniest thing. And he would he would be like, fucking Billy fucking owns me. Stop, dude. It was so funny. And this was it wasn't he telling you like his mind was a steel trap upstairs. 15 minutes prior.

And then he came down and was like, I don't want to do this. I want out of this. And it was just the night. So I'm going to get a phone call from the horse man. Why from this? No, he's he'll be fine. But it was funny.

He genuinely was upstairs telling me unsolicited that his mind is an absolute steel trap. Yeah. And I was like, so I was upstairs trying to figure out how to boil this burger on the stove, dude. Oh my God. That was one of my final memories that was still nice. I walked upstairs and that was high as shit.

He was just trying to broil a burger. Just smoke everywhere. I was trying to cook it on the stove top. Clearly a fire was about to start. It was bad. It was a lot. I thought the fire alarm was going to go off. So, you know, but it came up and brought a burger.

I'm like, dude, it's fine. I'm not even I was just smoking. Dude, I've come to the conclusion that smoking weed doesn't really do. I have to eat it. I can say I'm sure like the dabs and a lot of stuff would fuck me up if I sit there and smoke weed. Yeah, you were smoking them like it was a cigarette.

That's why my pretty is like sound like you're getting sick. I'm like, no, I lost my voice because I was changed. I was compulsively smoking marijuana cigarettes all weekend. Yeah, I came up on three hits of Molly to see Matt just boiling a burger. And I was like, dude, this is crazy. I was like, what are you doing?

It's crazy. He's like, what are you talking about? This feels bad. This could be bad. It was full. I'm like, I don't think it's a bad thing. And I'm like, I should have cooked burgers for everybody. I'm so fucking selfish.

Yeah, that second night was one of the funnest. I mean, that whole day was one of the funnest days of my life, easily one of the funnest days of my life. Yeah, that was fun. That was really fun. And the end of that, I mean. I regret the one regret I do have is not eating mushrooms. For some reason, I had it in my head like,

I need to preserve myself for that one. You should know you did the right thing. Yeah, but it would have been fun to have you out with the fire. That's what I'm saying. But I go, my boys are in the Netherrealm. It will happen again for sure. Well, maybe you might chill. I'm never going to the Netherrealms again.

True. That was it. I've been there. That was I'm done. You have one in this, you know, in the one I believe you, but there's one small, I would say, you know, scale. Yeah, I'm never going to do it again. If it was here like on a weekend.

You're drinking something else. I'd find. But, but I agree. There is no desire because once you, you had an ego death, dude. Your ego dissolved. All that junk. And then you transcend it, dude. You remote view to possible future.

Also, while I was dying, I was like trying to like tell my boys, like, dude, it's OK. For sure. I bend to the other side. It's tight. Go ahead. Like when I was coming back, I was like, let me go back up there.

Dude, you might be king, bro. You might be king, dude. Bro. Spud's convinced. Spud came out of this being like Shane's king. That's all. So, dude, I needed that so bad because I woke up rainy, rainy morning Sunday.

Gloomy. It was cold. Yeah, man. I had nothing in the tank. I was still hallucinating in the morning. I was walking up the steps and the steps were like swirling. And I was like, oh, I'm about to drive down these mountains. And I get in the car.

My phone had been dead all night. I open it. I was like, oh, see what's going on on Reddit. Everyone's like, Shane's get paypal. He's the biggest faggot of all time. And I was just like, am I getting it? Devastating. Yeah, man.

Yeah. What a wonderful weekend, though. But what a fantastic day. When I came out of the mountains, the fucking, the clouds broke. It was just a beautiful spring day. Got to go watch my niece and nephew run in these races at this park when I got back. Oh, it was so nice.

That's awesome. It was so nice. Went down late in my parents' basement on the ground. My cat, Tybalt, came over and bumped his head against me. He knew. Tybalt knew. Everybody knew. Everybody knew I was different.

I came home. My family was like, are you all right? I went out with my lady the next night to dinner. And she was like, you seem different. I was like, well, I died yesterday. I died multiple times. I died last night. I saw my death last night.

And I tried to explain to her. And she was like, oh. Yeah, a lot of bays are not with that. She thought it was funny. She was laughing it. Not angrily. They just go, I mean, a lot of people in general. When you guys talked about all that, like the ego death,

all that shit, I was like, this is hogwash. It's real, dude. That was entirely everything you guys talked about happened. Yeah. It's crazy. Yeah. In a little, just tiny little fucking weird little mushroom, dude.

It contains all that. Prophetic. I don't know how prophetic. I mean, you're convinced I'm definitely going to overdose? No, I don't think you will. Now you won't. I'm saying because it's us in the present moment, and then there's a sea of potentiality.

You know, there was just some things, and then the mushrooms were going, here's one you want to stay away from. And you just went, Roger that. Yes. You didn't do, you know what I mean? The universe did communicate pretty heavily, like chill. It's crazy, dude.

It's time to chill. I mean, dude, there's no proof that time is linear. We, you know, in terms of our consciousness, it could exist elsewhere in time and space. And we're just kind of like, you know, we can kind of, if we get good at it, we can kind of go back and forth. I'm saying I'm not going to rule that out. Do I know that's the case?

I don't know. Of course. It's definitely not, it's not definitely not the case. Normally I'd be shutting this down. This is the best I could, but I've seen some evidence. I see quite a bit of evidence that points to your argument. I've been reading Rupert Sheldrait today. Dude, he's the goat.

I had to, I had to go watch my, I watched The Darkest Hour with Winston Churchill. Did you? It always inspired me. You need some Churchill. I needed Churchill to just be like, yeah. Just to be like. He's in the, he's in the mock.

For sure. And when the time, when they needed him, he came out, started swinging, talking shit. Churchill was a man, dude. Easily, dude. I'm going to start throwing up the V for victory in every picture. Yeah.

Yeah, that was unbelievable, man. What a trip, dude. That was so fun. Yeah. Pying Spod into an ass was one of my favorite things I've ever done. Seen a P.S. dick. It's a huge dick. Watching just Spod and Billy, Spod and Pat.

Yeah. That was like my favorite thing, talking about how there was medieval Spods and Pats. Oh yeah. Like a thousand Pats would go into a village of Spods. They'd all start scurrying. Yeah, Pat's 6'6". Pat is a Viking.

Yes. Yeah. 6'6". He was just talking about how he basically only has diarrhea or just failed a couple times. He's like, I either have liquid shits or just failed attempts. Yeah. People were crushing me.

Like me and Rainey were walking. He was like, do you ever eat anything healthy? Like he wasn't saying it to be mean. He was just asking. And I was like, yeah. We kept walking. I was like, fuck it. Who was asking that?

Rainey. He was being nice. He was trying to be like, we was just being open. Because I talked to him before about it. I was like, I just can't like all that shit. And he was like, do you ever eat anything healthy? And I was like, walking up this hill. Dude, oh, this was my favorite one.

So I think it was right after while I was like dying, Haas brought up SNL and started asking questions. While I was literally like, what do you think about SNL? And I was like, why would you say that? So then the rest of the guys start trying to like build me up. And Rainey was like, he did one of those things where you like kind of tear someone down to be like, but you're the man.

But he left out the but you're the man. So he was just like, look, dude, you lost SNL. You're like kind of your piece of shit right now. Like all that stuff. And then he just stopped. He's trialed off. And I was just like, what's it do? Like, yeah.

I was like, you gotta finish that. So fucking cool. It was, Sim by the Fire was incredible. Said the kid rolled up the last night. Said the kid was chilling. They all. First of all, can we just take a page out of Sid the Kid in terms of how he deals a bay?

Leaves a wedding. It's like, I'm out. I'm going to the mallons. It's like, dude, what an animal. Leaves a wedding reception is like, all right, catch you later. So yeah, he's out of his mind, dude. Sid's out of his mind.

He's out of his mind. He holds it down, dude. He's an insane person. He's 1950s. He's a good insane person. He's 1950s. He's 1950s white guy. He's insane, dude.

It's insane. He's a strong black conservative. He is a strong black conservative, which is tight. But dude, leaving a wedding. I was like trying to run the, I was running the simulation in my head being like, all right, Brent, it's been fun at this wedding. I'll let go chill with my boys at the wedding.

That would have been a half an hour argument. Yeah, it's a fucking deep. It's fucking like, yeah, I'm out. I mean, obviously they probably talk about it, but I was just sitting there like, damn, dude, just being at a wedding, knowing you're about to chill with your boys is like pretty sick. Oh man.

Yeah. It's funny how high and quiet he gets just makes me laugh so hard. Yeah. Catching him at helium in the corner every now and again. He's just so quiet, so high. Yeah. They all, they all got launched as well. Yeah.

I don't know if they went to the dark world like I did. I think they stayed right in that. Yes. There's like, if you're at like an eighth, you're tripping your balls off as soon as you start to edge over that. That's when like you see shelter. Dude, I was eating so many like chunks of these mushrooms that I couldn't swallow.

Like it was too dry. That's it. Like I was like forcing them down. Yeah. You picked out as hard as I could on those things. Because at the time I thought it was going to be funny. It was going to be a good bit. It was not a good bit.

I passed away. I was deceased. It's so sick, dude. Yeah. So fucking sick. It was fun, but yeah, we'll see. We'll see if it sticks. Last night it stuck.

Yeah. Last night people offered me things and I said I can't. Yeah. Like there was no part of me that wanted to do it. 00:47:09,520 --> 00:47:11,440 And I had some Bud lights flowing a little. And I was still like, no. That's crazy to me.

Yeah. Yeah, man. Let's see. And I left. I left early. Had my last Bud lights. Like I'd see everybody. Yeah.

That dude, it puts a good feeling. Yeah, it is. I don't leave early. I never leave early. Yeah, go home. Walking out. Chilled. Put on some.

Yeah, dude. It's the best. I mean, dude, it puts a hole in the serotonin theory. How they're like, oh, you're depressed. Your brain doesn't produce enough serotonin. And it's like, okay, I'm sure that's the case. You know. No, I got plenty of serotonin up there.

Molly's proved that. It's been like, yo, you got a lot of juice up here. So that's the question. But it's like, okay, so that's the dominant model in terms of people's mental well-being. It's like, well, it's not you. It's not anything you're doing. Your brain's just slightly defunct.

But someone has one mystical experience on psilocybin. And all of a sudden, and all the studies show this. Dude, I think it's like 18 months later, people who won't smoke cigarettes anymore aren't as depressed, aren't as anxious. Fucking blows a hole in the serotonin hypothesis, dude. Which, by the way, hasn't been shown that good in studies. Yeah.

It's not much more better than placebo. I'm gonna be a dick, because that's like a lot of people's like, you know, that's what keeps them moving. But dude, I'm talking scientist to scientist, dude. Now that we're both shamans. Yes. I think this podcast is gonna fall apart now that we're both. No way, dude.

There's no yin and yang anymore. No, those yin and yang, dude. It's just yins, dude. I might have to be yang. We're bunch of yinsters. The mushrooms might yang me out. That'd be sick. If they yanged me.

If we switched. Dude, that'd be awesome. The mushrooms just yanged me out. Just switched personalities. They could. No, that's, I'm done with that stuff for a little. True, true. But I respect it.

That was just a little shock. That was a shock. I had to look. I felt its power. It's got some power. You go back to calling it gay. I'm going back to, well, some of it's gay. Some of it is gay.

In fact, dying is gay. Sure. Like experiencing death is gay as hell. That shit sucks. Oh my God. Yeah. That was, and also I've never, I've taken small amounts of mushrooms and so it's just like, it feels like you're kind of high.

You chipped. It's fun. It's having fun. Yeah. I've never hallucinated like that. Like where everything was a hallucination. Yeah. I've never taken acid.

So I don't know. You never entered God's house. God's house is gay. That shit sucks, dude. I mean, it looks cool. It looks cool. It looks cool. Yeah.

I'm going back. You're watching me hauss. You're watching me hauss out. Actually, everything else is gay. Oh fuck. Yeah. Oh man. No, that's awesome, man.

Yeah, we put those sketches, that first sketch out yesterday. Dude, got that coming. That was, I saw it. That was, I think that I believe that could have been our weakest one. We'll see. That's a strong way to come out. Yeah. It's just like, hey, sip on this.

It was just a weird one. It was a fun one. Take a sip. That was fun. Yeah. Take a sip. Yeah, people don't know what they're in store for right now. Yeah, we got a lot.

We got a lot coming. Thought of one today with Garry V's. Oh yeah. Did I just tell you? I think you started to. Yeah. I'm excited about that. Oh yeah, you did.

You did. Yeah. That's gonna be awesome. Dude. Yes. I mean, I couldn't be more excited. Yes. People.

Please subscribe to Gillian Keeps on YouTube. That would help me out. I do. I keep hearing people talk. Even if you don't like it. Just hit, yeah, do it. Just do it for us, dude. Do it, dude.

Do it because we're friends. Dude, we rarely ask for anything. We're friends. Yeah, we were literally. You guys are mean friends, but we're friends. That was uncalled for, dude. What the fuck, dude? That is uncalled for, man.

There's a lot of jerks, dude. I mean, you know, sometimes stuff gets lost in translation through text. People are like, you know, trying to josh on you. I think there were a lot more guys trying to josh. I think people are trying to josh. I didn't see that. Every now and again, you do have someone who ups the ante.

Like, no, actually, it's factually horrible. And you're like, all right, dude, take it easy. Yeah. I mean, dude, we're standing on the precipice of just, I wouldn't say utopia, but like, dude, shit's gonna get, I think, get really sweet. Yeah. Like 15, 10 years from now.

Yeah. But how so? What do you mean? Dude, blockchain technology. Decentralized media. People are going to stop it. Dude, fuck, I got to fight. There was a video, there was a, someone sent this to me

on Instagram. And it was funny too, because I kind of felt like a dick, because they sent me a video. And it was this guy, I forget his name. I got to pull it up. But he was on the Tim Ferriss podcast. And, you know, it was like blah, blah, blah, Bitcoin. That Bellagy, I don't know how the fuck,

however you say that. Bellagy, Severin. Let me see it. Oh. Blah. I think they called me. It's made up. It's a fake name, dude.

By the way, that's what every single word sounded like while I was on it. Sanskrit? Just Sanskrit. Did it really? Just Bellagy, Severin, Severin, Severin. And I was just like, dude, you're speaking in tongues. What?

That's all I said, dude. I bided now. I was Joe Biden. What? I was Joe Biden for five hours. I was just going. What? Dude, first of all, someone accused me of biding at one

point. I was like all stoned. And I was like, and I fucked my words up. And they're like, oh, dude, you fucking, you have a Biden brain, you fucking Biden brain. I just like. Yeah, I did experience that was, yeah, that was like while I was in that, I was like, this is what being old

and senile is going to be like, which is terrifying. True. And makes sense why they kill themselves a lot. Do they kill themselves a lot? Yeah. Teasers? Yeah. If you start losing your mind, you kill yourself.

Because it was like, I couldn't really see. I couldn't understand the sentence. People would say something. I'd get like one word out of it. I'm like, stop talking about teeth. They're like, what? I'm like, did I say that out loud? And they're like, you didn't say anything out loud.

Oh, man. Where are we? I kept doing that. I'm like, where the fuck are we? I was like, looking around the woods, the woods. I couldn't see anything. I was like, are we up high? I kept, I thought we were like in a treehouse.

You kind of were on a hill though. That was fucking me up. We were on a hill. Yeah, you're exactly right. We were up high. You were right. Yeah, you knew. All right, nice.

That worked. Yeah. You're, what's that called? You're like, your depth perception was still on point. Yeah, it was, it was the meter was spinning though. I was like, are we high? Where are we? But yeah, occasionally I'd be like staring at someone in the face.

Yeah. Because like, because their face would be changing. Sure. I'd just be sitting there looking in their face like, and so I'd be like, what the fuck are you doing? I'd be like, just occasionally out of nowhere, I'd be like, did I say that? Oh, man.

You're like, no, dude, you're all right. You're all right. Damn, dude. Dude, yeah. That was the first time I did mushrooms. I was on AOL instant messenger. Nice. So I was sitting there just being like talking to a girl,

be like, can you believe that our thoughts are just coming up on this? And the lady was, I was like, it's crazier. I, my fingers are just typing, but I was like, can you believe our thoughts are just coming up on the screen? And she was just like, what? It's like some girl I knew. And I was just like, this is crazy. GTG.

Yeah, GTG. GTG. Dude, I drove one time. I wasn't, I wasn't on as much as you. I took an eighth. And I remember there was a guy, you know, you know this now. And some people start to take on a sinister quality. See their face.

And there's this guy. And it was like, you kept putting on like the worst music. And I was like, dude, this fucking guy sucks. And I remember just being like, yo, I'm out of here. And my head, I was like, I, and I told this guy 10 minutes beforehand. I was like, yo, man, I got to be honest. I don't like you at all. That's right.

It just came out. And I was like, I just don't fucking like you, man. And he was like, damn. And I'm like, I just, I got to be honest with you. I just don't like being around you. So I drove these were the horse. These are the horse faces. Oh, that's what I was staring into the whole time.

Ah, absolute that. Oh, man. For those of you at home, I'm looking at a Goya painting. And this bug came down with the horse came down with the blanket. Raptor literally looked exactly like the witches and boy boy paintings. His face was right here. So I was like, oh, man, sorry. Sorry I'm going on about this.

No, it's fucking crazy. All right. Top. A lot of people, I think like 90% of people rated as the top five most meaningful experience of their life. So it's up there. Yeah. That was up there.

It's crazy. For certain. Dude, the, the shit I was listening to with whatever the guy's name is on Tim Ferriss podcast of Belaj, I think. Let me just see this again. It's going to drive me nuts. He said it a bunch of times. I thought he was, what is it?

Belajie. Yeah, it was Belajie. It's episode 506. Okay. Find it that way. But the, he started talking about like, I'm going to be honest, I don't understand blockchain stuff a lot, but he's talking about that a lot. And he was no clue what that is.

It's just like, it's using, I'm probably butchering this, but you're using the AI algorithm to just be totally neutral and take like an accurate in real time historical record that people can then use rather than have that being constantly manipulated. So they talk to a, so it's not fake news. It's not fake news and it can't be fake news. That's the thing. Like it can't, I mean, I, maybe, you know, obviously some, someone who could

figure out how to fuck with it. But apparently the way it's set up is that it cannot be fake news and you can't fuck with it. So he starts talking about like media bias and how it's just set up as the most unfair, crazy thing where it's like someone, like the distribution is totally unfair. We're a person in like a, you know, a large. So these guys are considered right-wing?

Immediately now they're considered right-wing. I can tell you right away that that sounds. But they're not, but the guy, the guy's being, yeah, he will, absolutely will be. So what they start talking about is how to safeguard yourself against all this bullshit. And the first thing he's like, you need to get financial independence, but you also need to get ideological independence where you can like have your own ideas because if you're not, you know, financially independent,

you're kind of not allowed to think for yourself because any way you think and then threaten your income. Dude, the, he starts talking about a book and this is what blew my mind. So you know those little things where they say like the, the spectrum of ally dumb and it'll be like, it'll be like a five-part thing and it'll be like white supremacist. Yes. White supremacist, sympathetic, neutral, ally, mega ally.

Yeah, exactly. It's me, I'm mega ally. Me, I'm a mega ally. So that's not like a. More like a mega ally. So he was saying, he's like, that's not by like, that's not some organic thing that people have come up with. That's an actual kind of like a, not a thought control, but it's a PR tactic.

So it's like, it's a way to influence people's thinking because they know, you know, cause like, all right, we'll put you on this continuum. They can't get someone from all the way on this side, all the way to this side. So what they do is this is from the book. I think it's called a beautiful trouble, which is a handbook to activism. So you would, you would go like, all right, so. Good trouble. Good.

Is it called a good trouble? That's what the one guy, the black dude in Georgia who passed away. Is it good? He used to call it. Is that so? Right. Wasn't that what he said? Who's the guy?

No, that was the guy. That was a. What was his name? Yeah. Yeah, it was good trouble, but there was a book. I think the book's called. Pardon me. I think the book's called beautiful trouble.

I beg your pardon. Oh, it's totally fine. I beg for your pardon. Oh, get the Zen flow. And another one. Did they just dissolve? No. You spit them out.

I take them out and put them in my pocket. You can see it during the podcast. Yeah, I try to make sure you're not looking. It's so fucking fun. Dude. So he was saying there's they have this. This is a tool, this whole idea. And they they're sending these things home with people to be like,

you know, in like grade schools being like, we talked about this last week, like show us where you think. The white supremacy. I'm a Nazi. Yes, you have a Nazi attending your school. It would be very funny to fucking circle up. And here you go. And it's like, you guys asked someone opening it like, whoa, fuck.

I knew we had Nazis at this preschool. So the whole point of that whole scale is that, you know, you get people thinking like, that's how simple the idea is. And you say, you're one of these, like you have to participate in this thing. And what they're saying is they'll take the weight to and this is something that's like been laid out as like a thing that works to kind of move people along like a thought spectrum, wait till something horrible happens. And then you start saying like that whole shit of like,

if you're not speaking up, you're like silence is violence kind of thing. Yeah. So you you say you have to do it. Everyone's social pressure. You start to get peered into like peer pressured into doing this stuff. And then what it does is like, you see people in your social network start speaking up because they feel the social pressure. All of us man is manufactured.

And then you see someone move from like, you know, the third one over there and you slowly try to move people up. And if people dissent, then you disrupt their social networks by hit pieces from the news who you can't compete with because they can write whatever they want. Even if it's totally factually incorrect, there's nothing you can do to them because their distribution is so large. Now, you know, they were talking about that shit.

And it was like, dude, at school, they're constantly hitting us with these fucking continuums and this and that. I'm like, this is crazy. It's just to try to love fucking spectrums. They love them. They love spectrums. Love spectrums, bro. But this this was like, you know, those things you take where it's like,

the test where it's like, I strongly agree, mildly agree, neutral, blah, blah, blah. The idea is you slowly condition people to move along via like social pressure from their network. And he was saying, if you want to be immune to it, you have to basically have to get yourself financially independent. You have to get yourself ideologically independent. And then you have to start worrying about what he's like, dude, the news, the way people move along these spectrums is and they've studied this

is dedicated by the news spectrum, the news outlets. They like fully believe in. And he was like, he's like, if you have someone who's like adamantly into anyone news source, you got to be careful because they are like Manchurian candidates. And as soon as they print shit, they're going to like, just he's like, they get glowing red eyes and they're like, and he's like, you got to be, you got to safeguard yourself against that shit. Just pumping me up, dude.

Nice. I was, I was fucking stoked on it. You should be pumped on that. Yeah, dude. I mean, dude, I'm weighing right now into starting like little cells, not like a terrorist way, but like, Oh, no. No, like,

start cells, cool cells, cool cells. I don't think there are cool cells. Yeah, there are. I've literally only heard of terrorist cells. Oh, dude. Timothy Leary, Timothy Leary was doing this and they put him in jail. Yeah.

They fucking totally. If you start cells, people put you in jail. Why? He's, he was conservative, dude. He was just trying to work the land with his family, dude, and they put him in jail for pot. I hate when you try to work the land. It's bullshit.

They love the land. It's bullshit, dude. Yeah, man. I'm getting back to land, dude. I'm forming psychedelic cells. You've grown a single thing, dude. What? You've never grown a thing in your life.

It is true that I failed to grow and weed twice. One time it came through. It was just kind of like sparsenary. Yeah. Dude, because they kept me from the fucking land, dude. I did you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I do. I have the, I like, it's within my like picture of myself. Trying to work the land. To have a green throne. Yeah. Dude, I'm all like with houseplants.

They fucking die. Yeah, houseplants are impossible. I'm good at working cacti though, which obviously pretty easy, but my aloe plant. Oh, boy, come on, man. Thrive it. My Maranta died, RIP. Oh man.

I hate to see a Maranta go. It was tough. It was fickle. It was a fickle plant. It's a fickle plant. My ZZ plant. Oh, I'm thriving. Nice.

It's another one. All right, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 01:01:33,360 --> 01:01:33,760 No, no. I'm sorry. You don't have to prove. That's a, that's a, that's a fucking hot point of mine.

Do you know how many plants died on me? I tell you, I'm like, oh. But yeah, dude, it's coming. It's coming. They're going to decentralize the media. They're going to lose their social control. It's coming, dude. People just have to hold out and stop being like,

everything's, it's like, it's about to get so fucking sweet. You can't be a bitch. You can't fall for all the bullshit, dude. Sit. Heard that. Everything's from the purse. Shut up. Yeah.

Everything actually is pretty sick. It rules. Shit's, shit's gay. No doubt. 01:02:04,240 --> 01:02:05,280 No dignity, no doubt. There's shit's gay. But it's a facade, dude.

It's a facade. Shit's actually straight as fuck. Look, I've seen the other side. You've seen it, dude. Seen dad. You saw God. I saw God, dude. Shit rules.

God rules. People need to get back in there. Colors swirling around. Just your dad sitting there. Awesome. Your daddy who you love. I love you, dad. Yeah, dude.

I love you so much. Yeah, I fucking love you, dude. I can't wait to die with you. Love you, mom. Thank you, God. Mom, you weren't up there. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

They fucking hate when we love the family and we love God, dude. They hate it. Hate it, dude. Yeah, God was up there chilling. For sure. Yeah. Who do you think produced the whole thing?

Dude, did you? Fuck, man. We should sign on the Patreon, dude. Hold on before we do. I do want to talk about you on stage last night. We did our show. Oh, fuck. We did our helium show last night.

I'm not sure when the next one is. I forgot about that. Should make an effort to come to it. Every single one. I'm not a type of person to be like, he was amazing, epic. Dude, every single one of those I've been to so far has been, I would say, pretty epic, dude.

Every time. It's a fucking movie. It's a fucking movie. It's a fucking movie. God damn. It's just that vibe, dude. But yeah, Bobby and Voss's intro. Not going to discuss it.

No, I can't. Dynamite. When he was first joking. He was fired up, dude. He was fired. He was getting fired up in the green room. Yeah, he was. People are talking.

Matrions and stuff. Bobby and Voss in a green room. It's a treat. It is the funniest thing in the world. It's a treat. It's two old dudes nonstop shit talking. It doesn't stop. And they critique every one of their own jokes.

Yeah. It's so funny. It's nonstop. It was funny seeing them pick at each other. Yeah. It's very funny. I didn't think I could do stand-up. I was like, after the trip, dude.

True. That was one of the things. I was like, did I lose everything? Got out there. It was great. Murder. I used my crutch. My strongest crutch, dude.

I brought Matt out with me. We smashed up. We had fun together. We had a mashup. Come on, man. It was great. While we were up there. I mean, dude, are we not a comedy machine?

Last night, I walked home last night, and I'm like, well, we're basically a push-button comedy machine. We went out there and just, what did we do? 20 minutes? Easy. Easy. We did two 10-minute sets.

Probably. Yeah, we did a half hour. Probably two 15 minutes. But it was, I knew. I was just tossing noobs. I knew some of your jokes. So it was. You were throwing some no-looks.

But I tried to toss a noob and Matt misinterpreted it. Yeah. Instead, it came down with, you slanted. You broke the net, dude. I broke the backboard. You broke the backboard, dude. You broke the backboard. I threw him a noob because one of his business ideas,

we were talking business. Yeah. One of his old jokes was he was going to start Uber for girls that want to get their pussy eaten, and it's just him. He just receives a notification, and he drives your house and eats your pussy, which is very funny. So I was up there.

I was like, you got some business ideas? She was like, I do. I was like, dude, tell me that one business idea you told me. And he just looks at this audience. It was a sold-out crowd. And he was like, oh, porn, buy children, four children? And I was just like, no, that wasn't it. Whole place.

This absolutely gaped the audience, dude. 01:04:54,720 --> 01:04:55,280 Bedlam. Dude, it was. Dude, we both started crying immediately. Yeah, it was, dude. That was so fun, man. Yeah, it was great.

Then it's going off on that for like five minutes of the child names, dude. This is not, this is an inappropriate joke. This is gross stuff. I mean, when you're live, it's fine. When you're live, it's chill. Yeah, when you're live, it's fine. We were just talking about like, if you know how porn stars

have like porn star names, like, do you think child? Do you think they get porn names? And I was like, yeah, a 12-year-old black kid named Recess. You had to be there, dude. You had to be there. I know on this stuff. Yeah, I know on here it sounds like we're, this is junk, but it was. And that's not something we like to joke about.

Not at all. That type of stuff isn't funny, but. Pedophilia, a fibophilia is not a joke. You know what a fibophilia? No. People who are in a women age 15 and 19. 15 and 18, I believe it is. A fibophilia.

What? Dude, I was also a joke at like thinking to myself, like if I woke up right now back at that fire, just like, oh, no, I'm still here. Like this was a hallucination. Yeah. Fuck, dude. Yeah, it was. You've been hallucinating since you smoked K2.

And then for years. That's your second ego death by the way. This is, well, yeah. No, that one, I thought I was dying. So you were there being like, I'm dying. I think I'm having a heart attack. That's a panic attack. Yeah.

Yeah, that's all that was. Fine line between ego death and a panic attack. That was a totally different death. That was a real death. You were dying. That was a, well, the one I thought I was dying and I was like, I can't go to the hospital for weed because that's gay, even though K2 definitely could have gone to the hospital. But no, the mushroom one, I thought it was, there was no moment where I was like,

oh, this is just mushrooms. I'm hallucinating. It was 100%. You have it for a while and then it just gets away from you. Yeah. It's fucking. When I had it, it ruled. While I was like hallucinating and I was like every five minutes, I'm like, whoa.

I think everyone was annoyed with me. People were chilling. I was trying so hard to keep it together. I was working so hard not to spaz. I mean, dude. Because I could have. I could have easily be like, you do. You do have a very solid mental foundation.

One guy did do that. Really? No names. But one guy went in his room, got in his underwear and was hollering. Very funny. Yes. Someone who it's always very funny to me to watch people who are like, that doesn't affect me just and then come out and tell you why they're not like,

I'm totally they're trying to explain why they're not tripping while they're obviously tripping. And it would do it. It's so funny to watch like, and I know this move to have done this myself. I go like, I'm going to bed and I'm like just out of my fucking mind. It's like, I did that one time at like 830 on a Saturday night. Like, I'm going to hit the sack guys in the fucking laying bed. Like, oh, that was the one time I fully came to grips with the fact that I was an animal. And I was like, oh, I'm a fucking animal.

I'm no different than a bird on a branch. We're just watching TV. And I was just like, all of a sudden, I was staring at the bed. Yeah, I'm Bush, guys. Catch you tomorrow. You're like, what? Yeah, the one guy was like 21. He's being like, I'm going to turn it in.

One guy was sitting at the fire and he was like, this shit's not working. I'm going to bed. A half hour later, he came back down with like a blanket around him. He's like, this shit works. It's like, it works. 01:08:16,400 --> 01:08:17,040 Man, that's the best. Yeah.

There's so many people trying to like, not me, no way. It's McCusker curse. It's so funny. The McCusker curse. Yeah, that shit does get brutal after a while of like 10 dudes being like, I would never do it. Are you gay? I'm not fucking gay.

Yeah, I work tomorrow. Can't just fuck around all day. Shut up. I've seen what you've been doing this whole weekend. Yeah. All right. Let's let's switch it over. Let's switch it over last night.

That is like, yeah, come to that helium show. So fucking I mean, dude, people will regardless, but that shit is so fucking funny. Not sound like a dick. Everyone I've been to has just been packed. This do yourself a favor, man. This Thursday, Friday and Saturday, the 15th, 16th and 17th of April, I'll be at helium comedy club in Buffalo.

The next week we're shooting more sketches than the 29th, 30th and 1st of May. I'll be at the Harrisburg Comedy Zone. I'm TBD. Yeah, Matt might be. I'm seeing how I'm going to be coming out of exact. Now you understand. Oh, yeah. I'm coming out.

You're going to want to do it. I think so. When I was in it, I was like, I love stand-up so much. Yeah, yeah. I had fun last night, too. 6th, 7th and 8th of May, I'll be at side splitters in Tampa and the 9th. So that's Thursday through Sunday in Tampa. Please come to that.

I think it's like fucking nine shows. So many packed. Hopefully. I don't know. They spread. There's so many shows. I think on Saturday, there's three. It's Florida, dude.

I think on Friday and Saturday, there might be three shows, which that's tough. Jesus Christ. 13th, 14th and 15th Mall of America, the dreaded Mall of America. Oh, you're going back. Back, dude. Is that where the petting zoo was? No, there's an aquarium there. Okay.

It's pretty sick. But the Mall of America was a tough one last time. Yeah. So if you want to see me go to battle go to the Mall of America, the 13th, 14th and 15th of May. And that's all for now. Hell yeah. But yeah, please subscribe to Gillian Keeps on YouTube.

That helps us out. Fuck yeah. Yeah, do that. Thank you for watching. And I apologize. I apologize to everybody. I'm sorry. I was gay.

Dude, you might have been too alpha, dude. To play to play little kitty games. I'm saying to be up that night. You were strategizing for battle, dude. You want to commune with the Viking gods on the D. Dude, just be this and bud heading out on D. M. T. So if we're just fucking then fucking where there was no, there was no like taking DMT is like a, oh, this is a journey.

It was just like, let's get fucking ripped. Yeah. There was there was zero chance. Fuck that rules. Thank you for watching. Yeah, man.