Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast - Ep 394 - McCusker Fambly Fuckjob (feat. Swim, Spud, & Billy)

Episode Date: May 11, 2022

Support the D.A.W.G.Z. @ patreon.com/MSsecretpod Support Warmode @patreon.com/WARMODE hempycampers.com wuz gud. Shane's across the pond. So Matt blasted off on Changa and casted with the bros in warmode studios. Please enjoy.  Support the show and get 20% off with the code DRENCHED at https://Lucy.co Support the show and get 3 months free by visiting https://ExpressVPN.com/Drenched  

Begin we've started officially right now. All right. What's up, bros dudes? Thank you for doing this Hey, man. Yeah, no problem chains in I think Scotland right now. Really? Yeah, I was dude I was sitting there. I was just going what the hell am I gonna do to your bro ship contact Not only we're gonna do the podcast. We're gonna let you smoke changa As a pre-wreck which is fair enough I just wanted to give you the experience of smoking changa just like to set it up like that dude They should start selling that shit like they used to sell salvia. I want a petition. I want a lobby to bring like Really insane quick psychedelics, but like they had salvia legal and I think it's not still legal. It's state to state

Is it really? Yeah, who do you think is like the governor who's like nah, bro? Let's let that be a won't let it do it It's just so funny for that to hit a governor's desk and like what are we doing today? He's like what's the deal with salvia? I want to make them smoke it and he's like this is your legal There's only like 12 states where it's legal so this governor's must have been like dude It's actually chill if you prepare for it We know it's nuts No, it's not just salvia like when you get into all the research chemicals

Yeah, like not that salvia is a research chemical. I'm not gonna put that on I was about to say I was about to stand up Yeah, that's a plant bro. It's the old. I think it's the oldest known psychedelic I could be salvia salvia is like the first thing people got ripped out. Oh my god Being like basically an animal and smoking salvia and it's been like what the fuck but um When you if you were to like go online and buy research chemicals It'll be like illegal in Florida, Illinois. It's like you'll pick the weirdest molecule. Are you talking about swim? Illegal in like nine states and I'm like how the fuck did like for HOD IPT get illegal in And only for like what the fuck happened to some dude probably did something fucked up in Delaware

The salvia thing was a kid killed himself in his suicide letter wrote about didn't you write about salvia or something? He had been smoking salvia, but that's not why he started running with the wrong crowd No, he just he killed himself because he smoked salvia realized he was better suited on the other side fair play He that was what his mom tried to make it like oh he smoked salvia that made him kill so he's like no Not really Wait, so he shed his he shed his fucking this mortal coil But it's like you can't blame salvia, you know for if your teenage son killed himself from gas station drugs mom's a snitch That's probably the first time she party pooped true

Fair point, dude It's not my home state, but it's close. Yeah, it's your home state pretty much you grew up out there I mean pretty much Delaware, Pennsylvania. Yeah, but you were right on the border your whole life. I mean, yeah, I liked it there It's pretty nice. I only did eight years on that border. It was chill. It's a chill as that whole area is chill Delaware sucks Fucking for sure Right behind New Jersey, New Jersey blows has good things about it though Yeah, I would say New Jersey is like the pine barrens are cool

Yeah, you haven't seen much of there's tons of like beautiful lakes Delaware flat out sucks. Yeah, Delaware sucks on like a depressing level jerseys like comically shitty Yeah, but Jersey has like that's pretty good. There's like little spots in Jersey. No offense, Gardein Yeah, Gardein's neighborhood is nice, but there's spots in Jersey that are genuinely nice Delaware is like this flat fucking wasteland Yeah, it's all it goes on till you get to the beach and then the Delaware Beach is kind of blow Yeah, they don't and they've been I don't know if you know about the Delaware beaches, but uh, you know boys The boys move Delaware basically is so shitty it compressed all the gay dudes are like now and they just concentrated in one area

We'll take this one. Yeah, like the rest of the like when you drive from the top of Delaware to the bottom It's the same thing until you get to the ocean. Yeah, it's just a flat fucking strip mall and there's no like I don't know Dude just talk differently like once you get down like smirna and shit They're different the wild thing was when Zeus ran away Zeus ran away on the border of PA in Delaware got picked up in Delaware Where I had to go pick him up was like the south. What oh it gets so country wild like they're they're like lost dog thing It was way down and it was like on the south the woman didn't get so fucking hillbilly It was like a farm and it had it was like a prison for dogs. Yeah, it was wild It was an outdoor prison for dogs everyone's on opiates to oh really the whole state like Delaware city down there, dude

Delaware jet in general people are like, that's where your boys from. Oh, big hunter An archetype of Delaware residents. Yeah, has all the money in the world and also shoots It was nice well Joe Biden did in fact molest children. Yes, you can't say he sexually did but he definitely Extremely he bothered them to an extreme level Molestation definition of molestation. He's done that. Yeah, he bothered kids immensely Which is makes him a molester in the classical definition of there's a montage. I've seen it. Yeah, he's literally molesting kids But Hunter Biden is like when I saw when he came out of the news. I was like, oh, I went to high school like 30 of these Yeah, yeah, right like they drove BMWs and like crashed them because they were smoking

But then in Delaware like it's weird the way Delaware is laid out the private schools are like So wealthy, but then those kids that go to private schools will still hang out with like the worst of juvenile delinquents that are like Like they somehow meet in Delaware because they're so small. There's common ground So like I remember I would go to parties in high school and you would have like Like the Biden's kids would be there and then there'd be kids that were like smoking crack Are you like the age of a button? Yeah, there was a Biden a year older than holy shit What I don't use I'm not gonna say Oh, it was a lady

He's done the snits. Yeah, I don't do It's a for it's the first daughter, bro, and you're gonna come on man He sure I don't I know you have your thing about Joe Biden, but I respect the office Can we get it? Can we reach a consensus here? I'll respect the office. I respect the office Dude imagine every vote for it doesn't matter once that votes counted and then your president That's my president now a hundred percent. I couldn't agree. I couldn't agree. I don't badmouth. I'm so excited for the next president Whoever it is. I just can't wait to support them I don't vote. I just support whoever

There's no party on the president so Almost storming the Capitol for anyone in office. I saw I like the dudes who like love cops and first responders I saw a sign the other day. They just said see heart p.s. Outside of something's like I heart cops. I heard cops people like love cops, dude Yeah, dad was blue lies matter like hard as fuck for a little while and then he just had a little running with law enforcement And immediately it's like these guys are out to get me. This is a fuck job I can't stop calling everything a fuck job, dude He was getting fucked for some reason he had to talk to the cops and he tried to come out explain the situation

They're like sir get in your car and like that whole squad hates when dudes who are younger than them like kind of big Boy them. Oh, yeah, and immediately just gets on the horn like this is a fuck job. This guy's got it out for me Why the fuck is he doing this? What are you? What was he doing? It was it was just stuff that happened to him where like the cops got involved in like something on the road Oh, you like got a like a moving violation not move. It's just like an accident solicitation His dad ever like brought you out, huh his dad brought you out before brought me out Yeah, like like pick up girls and pick up girls and like you know, he wouldn't do

I Mean I'm sorry, I think he waits till you're like 32 and dad You haven't been in the bunny ranch with dad yet Dude you think smoking changor Wait till you share a woman with dad I Get mom and daughter only fans now, what how do you know that? Joe it just happened on barstool

And daughter only yes, where they're like that's a risk is not I don't know if they're fucking but they're both Fuck they says whoa, I wouldn't imagine that wait It's not Do they just like talk about sex to each other they're naked I guess I don't know all I heard was a god That's a mother daughter only fans. Oh, so they're like co-hosting it They're in an only fans where they probably both get naked for money, but it's them too next to tell you no contact No, I don't think they're tripping. I don't think they're doing that. That's cool Bills

Dude, some guy is just screaming in front of his laptop and just shutting it Be like, what have I fucking done dude that a lot of that shit happens in Appalachia Well chicks will just grip up a real humble like 350 a month only fans where they're like I'll just put my shit up on all the fans and like get some subscribers Dude be like the bottom of only thing just like maybe 200. How do you know so much about only fans? I watch a lot of soft white underbelly. No, I never subscribed. I never paid for any content I actually when I had browsers, it was beer Mike McNabbah 5. I'll never you had you had the password

You know contents is the lowest bro waking up waking up with like a hangover realizing you We like I'm gonna cancel us in 30 days you let that first 30 roll and you're like it's actually kind of tough My friend I've woken up like with like hot eyes and just like a full fucking hangover with like my laptop open to like camgirls Jesus Christ a level of horny where you're getting your wallet out and typing in numbers, you know You'll think about like 17 times and you're like, no, I'm not signing up for this fucking shit then one day you're just like Oh It's like requiem for a dream where like everything

And you're like, whoa, this is what I've been blocked from then you slowly start to realize like it's not any different Yes, it's like yeah, no, that's great paying for points and saying there's a level of it where you can pay to like direct You can like write a script and like do this Yeah, there's a level that's that's how yeah, but you can like you can like write a porn script to your favorite porn star And it yellow a couple grand and you'll be you'll be like do this exactly No, that was I read it dude the most fucked up thing someone sent me recently. They're like, what are your thoughts on frozen porn? What's that fucked up to like Elsa and Anna? No, not Elsa and Anna What's frozen porn like women just freeze and then dudes are like, oh, what's that's what's up?

And this start like fucking it's a new one. It's totally cantonic Fucked up freeze like in place. Yeah, it's like stuck but frozen stuck with frozen like that movie with Adam So they're stuck in there's stuck in time. Yeah, the movie where Adam Sam has a remote click It's click dude. Yeah, I I think about that a lot. It's there. Some guy was like Consensual I was a you that's what I said. I was trying to figure out like consent It's fucked up when you're watching the ladies just like with their eyes open and the dude's like That's very fuck it's fucked up dude. I someone said like what are your thoughts on this and I was like, dude You gotta look it up. That's the devil. You go get one to SR immediately, dude

Yeah, you're in like frozen like now. I'm just I could freeze this girl right now If only this girl had no Faculties whatsoever was frozen in time and I could touch here I mean is that like kind of along the same lines of free use. What's free use free use is just like dude Showing his fucking ass What's free use spiking again He's just going through the categories Oh, yeah, I'm free use free use

Cross for use You're violating me differently I think Billy told me back four years ago We're like, it's like a consensual thing where you and your chick you say like it's mine whenever I want it It's like having a keg or a pussy in your house. That's what I thought marriage was when I was like 10 years old I was like, I can't wait to get married. I mean, that's what I think No, I was genuinely like dude, it's so fucking sick when you have a wife I thought you just like come in and it's like there's like completely just just have sex whenever I've had that kind of

True I thought it was I thought it was like it was just on like my conception of it was like I've been using That fucking that Changa man. I was sipping on that Changa I don't understand how you say you just like to puff on that casually. It's just I don't understand you that was about to explain it Dude, so I so I come in here I'm sorry Kevin for the motherfucking bros at home, but dude that that's a sick ad read for Changa in general true Dude, I don't think you should be sold No, I think they should take like the way they do like

Like voting blocks and pick one person per block to make it for everyone. Oh, okay. Yeah, that would volunteer We have to it has to happen where it's your Changa head dude. I like it. Yeah, it's very enjoyable I respect it, but I wouldn't say I that's not Yeah, but once you yeah, I'm not gonna cut you off. Yeah, no, it's over for sure I'm telling you I respect it. But yeah, the experience for me was like that was fucking nuts. Yeah, I've just I got blasted into a Literal just fucking torture chamber. I got blasted into a torture chamber run by like multi-dimensional aliens Terrifying like three minutes who just mocked me. They're like, what are you doing here? You idiot It's butterly said the same thing. He said when he smoked DMT

He like got in a car with I think he got high. He got jet. He had hijacked Yeah, he said someone has made fun of him for having a wife and kids for No, mine was really just kind of like the same thing happened to me with five grams of mushrooms or was like, dude Like you think you like this is what you want This is fucked up stuff. And I was like, this is crazy and he's like, dude You're such a pussy about your day-to-day reality. You got to start milking that for all it's worth the whole time I'm like, I'll be such a good boy. Just send me back. Please. I'll be such a good boy Damn you and rogan has the same shit. I'm a comedian. He said they all gave me a finger

I do stop taking yourself. It's a top five podcast thing. Is it really it must be it must be the top It must be when you reach the top It's cold on top of the mountain. I'm sure it wouldn't happen to like Steven. Well, you know, they say You get to the top of the mountain you realize there's only lightning up here for you I believe it was a quote from Nietzsche. That was from a Rodney Mullen from the Tony Hawk documentary I still haven't worked on becoming punk Yeah, that was the most confusing shit ever what I was fucking like an hour in to doing the mushrooms and Tom rolled up And he's just like, you know, do you shelf it? I'm like, no, bro

What are you talking about? He was asked if I shelfed the fucking other candy bar under the bed. I was like, no He keeps you of hiding. Yeah, he's like, is there a punk store here? I was like a what a punk store, bro What are you talking about? You're getting punk. He got some ink. Yeah, I have no body. I need gear Yeah ankle. Hold on. What does it have to do with you hiding mushrooms? He came out check on him I just he was awake. So I asked him if he hid the other mushroom bar So you started fucking with them. We're just having a good time I enter and then I was looking for a punk store because I was watching the Tony Hawk documentary And I decided I was gonna go punk while he was on like just something to do. That's a nice move

I'm trying to 40. I got to do something. I was gonna go just full 40 year old punk You should Gotta go somewhere. No, you would smash in in a powered head So I would smash that's a pirate looks at 40 right there. That's for sure, dude I might bleach my hair this summer. Thank you That's a good idea Punks not your vibe, dude. Yeah, but the Tony Hawk documentary while you're watching it. You're pretty much a pro skater Yeah, dude, it's the best. I was like watching a thing. I was like, I think I've done a 900

After like the shows I was like, no, I actually never skateboard, but it's you watch it. Yeah, dude I I definitely did it. What's it called McTwist? You might have been the worst at skating out of everybody that's not true. That's so true You I have no idea Matt. I went Matt. I mean freestyle Matt. Billy vert You're Billy's a better vert. You're very vert Billy Billy was I ever afraid to drop in Tom does downhill jam? That's all you. Yeah, I'll give Tom that I'm a soul skater though. So I'm not I suck at skateboard. I never skate. I've seen you jump three times

I've seen you physically jump three times. Can you dive in a pool yet? I can't dive I didn't grow up like with a pool like you guys did though. I grew up in the first half of the family We didn't there's a pool there. I was fucking 14 when it came. I was smoking dope. I was Dad said there was a pool Like they canceled it your next door neighbor at a point said everyone would swim in it and you would stare outside the window Oh, yeah smoking Changa I Didn't I could never dive I still can't do it. Hey, you got to break the barrier

I can't swim can't sit here and smoke Changa like ten times You can't just put your head before your ankles Physically can't do that like water in your ears and nose. I'm telling you I get up every intention of diving into the pool And I pencil and that's okay Part of my body. That's like now you stapler. Yeah, it's kind of stable. I'll kind of be bent Yeah, but my body just won't do it that actually that shit gets chicks wet when they see you jump in Oh, you jump into water like a kangaroo you jump in the water like sheepishly I

Can't swim dude. Can you kneel and then go head down now? Dude, I was on a swim team in Havartown. Were you really I was on a swim Are you caracom in caracom in a speedo up on the stands? I would literally jump in the pool and then start swimming and I would lose races by like to pull Dude, dude, dude We were we all ran track in fifth grade they stopped the mile because he was two laps behind I was running back where I was running track, right? He was like Mario Kart

We're the wrong way. They just stopped it. They're like Tom. Come on. I was running track one time that's fun and The coach pulled me aside and was like stop fucking around Don't have to try to make everyone laugh. I was like, what are you talking about? They're like, there's no way you run like that That's how I run He was like he like benched me really he was like, there's no nobody runs leaning like that And I let it go I was like whatever that guy was just weird and then like a couple months later We're in school and I was like making fun of some girl and we were going back and forth

Then she was like at least I don't run like you and everyone started laughing. Oh my god, bro And to this day, I still don't know how I ran It was funny Vaguely remember you running I never run I never have a reason to run I don't have a fight or flight reflex no reason And I don't remember much the fucked up shit is what spade told me father fucking dub said don't what father dad the father Williams About what about being a big boy?

You might not remember this but when we were fucking crazy me you and Fed were doing a funeral or a wedding and I mean you were the candle You're all your boys. Okay, and Fed was bearing the cross. Okay, father Williams came in kind of kind of like half-cocked I was making fun of how small I am Because he asked me how tall my mom was I was adopted So my mom was five nine and he's laughing. He was like a boy should be taller than his mother I was like 13. What might have been five one My mom was five nine your mom was like five nine thirty six thirty two thirty

What are you saying, he's a very beautiful breathtaking you have a beautiful wife as well. Thank you What a fucking pervert Pervert's a compliment. His mom was stacked. You know, sorry Measurements like your trick daddy Remember because my mom was in a wheelchair for most What a beautiful me too what a fool Stop this has gotten derailed. He said his mom was that I didn't say bro He's just said his mom was stacked in clears day. It's all the day about different mom different mom. Yeah

Yeah, lucky the two moms Billy Billy's a lot of daddies does Billy have a lot of daddies. He's not only fans, bro, dude Dude We could go to blows it'd be Yeah, we're not about that they're gonna add to work. We're here to give people the changa. Yeah. Yeah, dude That shit was almost turned no one to a South Street, dude No, I thought he was orange juice man 17 minutes out No one in a full fucking like street urgent mode, dude. I was gonna drop him at like fourth and south

Your glass of orange juice don't let anyone tell you otherwise. No, it's gone dude I thought he's an urban legend. I was like, fuck I did it this time. Yeah, that show that would Every teacher I had in high school told me that stupid ass orange juice story there supposedly was an orange juice man in Delaware I think he was in Philadelphia. Yeah, I'm was he a normal I'd love to do a deep dive to find out like was he actually a normal person was it just schizophrenic No one ever saw him like it was just this rumor of someone took acid and they thought they were a glass of orange juice And if you went near them, they thought you would tip him

Yeah, I've heard it a hundred times there was a there was like five different variants of the same sort like no one ever met The orange juice man. Yeah, same with midget midget land. He was like the cookie midget lands real midget lands real Yeah, I've been there midget land was real. Yeah shortstop signs. That was a real deal. Yeah, we're not the major chase you It's him really by the hospital. You're fucking was the cookie game real. What was the cookie game real? What's a cookie game? Do you talk about the cookie game? No, we were in school very feel the kids at St. Francis play the cookie game and like they all Would jerk off in a circle last one to finish Shit is foul

I don't think I know they were done it I Remember like when I was at Temple dudes from Glen Olden like had no problem having sex with the same chick Like they would all run train on chicks. I thought it was so bizarre wait like they would both bang a chick at the same time Like devil's three some that's and they were just like it's sick dude. Yeah, that's not no that happens That's like a high school thing. That's like there's just like squads of dudes that'll where they ask a lot of athletes do that Not this one, bro. You're a good boy devils threesome. No, thanks. You would bet you would but you know, but you're both there You're both torqued. You're gonna step aside and be like 100 percent. Yeah, I feel like I'm not doing this shit sauce, bro

It's us for sure, but getting naked with another dude regardless is sauce for sports. Huh? I never did. Yeah, you were getting a gift for sports, but not to get pussy with the dude I'd keep my boxers on in the shower. I wouldn't think a shower, bro. Go home. Thank you. That's SDE. What's that smoke like energy? That's okay No, that's chill. That's a good move. I know dude who got into a devil's threesome Yeah, and he this wasn't me by any means for sure clarify that He was like him and this dude and this chick we're all hanging out They all started having sex, right? So he was on the box and the other dude was doing PIM. Yeah, and

And he was like doing his thing pumping away right and like she was blowing the other dude And then she like sat up and was like switch and then the dude switched from PIM to PIV And then the dude I knew went up to PIM and as soon as the other dude started plowing She forgot he was in the room and he just stood there with his fucking wang out while this chick was just gone off the DONG This is why you don't partake. He just stood there and she like stopped blowing him everything It was just like the DONG just took it over. He said the fucking jackrabbit came out It was just like he was just nailing it. He was just sitting there like going soft watching this dude

100% in vet sex. That's like a traumatic experience. Yeah. Oh, that sucks So I'm not trying to play. He might have been into it though. Why didn't he fucking like speak up cuz dude People were reinventing sex in front of Yeah, I'd want to just like and he just was there was he wasn't in the room anymore No, he could have he could have fully reasserted himself. Maybe I don't know then you're begging bro I mean, dude, just a sad sitch all the way around that sucks If you look at that way, maybe you turn around celebrate their odysysm. The dude just come that's true, too I would have completely so I don't remember how it finished. Maybe he tapped back in

I just remember he told me the story was your boy that told you the story Which guys what's his name right now? No, I'm saying is he the jackrabbit guy? No, he's the other guy. He's the dude who got kicked out I would have went I would have went through her drawer and I found one of her toys and just toyed myself Oh, yeah, true. She might not have been hosting. That's why I usually carry I usually carry toys like that to an event Funny shit is my boy. I know this dude. You know this dude He claims that someone told him he's like, dude My boy guy was getting a blowjob under the L

Then he reached down in the middle of the blowjob felt in between the legs going for a little pussy felt a dick And I was like, bro, nobody would tell that story. That was you It was obviously you bro, that's so yeah, that's another urban legend Like yeah, the dude just like didn't come out for a month didn't talk to anyone But eventually he came around a guy just sat in his room like fuck Shoot that's at every strip club. They're like, there's a dude there that chicks a dude. You got to watch out. Oh Yeah, yeah, yeah, well, I go my 21st birthday never heard that what they always said there was a dude showing down Yeah, they said claim they said claim the old Asian lady was a dude. Yeah, no for a fact. She isn't

No for looking confirmed I Went there for my 21st birthday. Yeah, how was it? Did you get hard bro? You brought me I did that was fun That was a lot of fun. They get you know, they like put you up on the stage and fuck with you Yeah, yeah, they did that and I get that like the chick shoved whipped cream up my nose Like the whole day like it like the next day my whole fucking face just smell like rancid milk It was fucking horrible. Yeah, the whipped cream probably had fentanyl in it. Yeah I'll come around I was way before brother. Yeah, it's fentanyl like pretty new. It's been around. I think it just flooded the streets

Yeah, I would say it's probably the 2000s. Do you understand how it was thousands fentanyl? I think it's a research chem gone wrong No, I have no idea why I'm just saying like there's people that like it's like Oh, if you fucking put your fingertip on your dad, and then there's other like black chicks on soft white under brother Like I have fentanyl lollipops. Yeah, I mean fucks that. Well, it's like they have like measured doses of you I mean, I think people when they get off the street. They don't know what it is So you had like a lot of you measuring that little bit of amount if you can reach into someone's pocket and fucking die from it I don't think dude. I don't know legend. That's one vid. What it's like lively touching it reaching in and touching it and dying

Wait skin like the skin contact. Oh shit, bro. I'd have to see the vid. Yeah I saw a video of a guy landing on the moon one time, dude, right The cop reached in maybe a needle. I don't know no fentanyl is not strong enough to touch your finger Yeah, I find that hard to believe. It's insane. You'd have to be It's not possible. This is what I'll touch that. No, I will debunk you Is it all that Hendricks shit? Don't touch us. Oh That's all the urban legend to the false. Yeah, I held a sheet of acid one time not knowing what it was and nothing happened Really, I'll just hold on to it and what's real is to do the pitch the no-hitter. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, what very true

You do the doc hot or doc holiday. Yeah, it's only that yeah doc something holiday for my friends No, he was like a met I think but he thought he had the day off. So he popped two tabs of acid Chilled on the beach and they summoned them and then they call it. No, you got a game today So he went and pitched a no-hitter and I dude it wasn't as you think it was super pretty his pitches were nuts, dude Obviously, but it was no one. It was still was a no-hitter. No hitters like really hard to do. It's fucking insane Did it though? sick facts No fun facts man

Like you can get the fentanyl patch You're supposed to wear it on your arm for like all day and it gives you like slow release Does get you geese there? What happens is what happens is the boys would pop them off their arms and nibble them So you cut a small hole and you suck a little bit of that gel and it like Fucks you up big time. Jesus, but it's probably dosed according That's what you're saying these guys on the streets die from but there's no way a cop's touching fentanyl powder and dying Bro, where'd you see this video on the next mom's Facebook? Chain email must respond

It's not true. I can't believe they do this Yeah, in order to go through your skin and kill you instant a Later on I don't have my phone. No, what do we got here? Get up get over here and just I love all that Facebook shit Where it's like a picture of a do with like tattoos and piercings is like what would you do if your daughter brought him home? It's a bunch of rumors like I tell them to get the fuck out of here. Oh, yeah, take Tom's Mike deliver the fucking what happened I Want to know this right? Oh, you had to spell this one right? We can't be on here sharing misinformation, dude Yeah, it's true if I'm right. You have to take your shirt. We can't we can't be making fentanyl seem more scared

Dude, we can't make fentanyl seem more scary than it is. That's wrong Skin exposure is not expected to lead to toxicity due to his Extremely poor penetration of the skin barrier and symptoms of intoxication from skin exposure are unlikely Damn, bro. Hey, man, even Jesus It'll take your show my with that All right, so maybe you got to what maybe got prepped still stay off a start out. Where's the vid? Also, yeah, whatever do let's I mean, yeah, let's move it on. Let's just move on Don't do fit don't touch that at all

But if you do you won't die dude that there's like Asians and shit that are getting busted bring it like I know people live in Apartments like on the on Columbus Boulevard and they're bringing that shit in all day long in Amazon packages Like they're constantly having busts from like fentanyl coming over from Asia. It's crazy. Yeah, man Like constantly not change subject. Yeah, but I know a dude that was trying online dating and went directly to FetLife What? Saw a friend All life Immediately went to FetLife. He's not into anything

All of his bases Boomer and he's like, yo take a picture of me. It's for a dating website and I had his password And I think he's like set this up for me Set up this pet life account. Did you get any action? No, and the first one of the first people you saw was someone that we both knew yeah Who we had no idea was into getting a Nile Getting beat up and shit

I know this person. No, it was like a very loose associate. We knew her from the neighborhood. God you guys Isn't this so no, do I know the person who joined as a profile? Yeah, yeah What was the gear on the picture of? White t-shirt flannel button to the top like a cholo. What was he claiming? He's Doc Martins. What was he claiming his kink was okay? No, no He was trying to hit everything he was poking around He was just like hitting all the sites and you guys found something you knew who just likes that was his first one though

It was like pictures of bruises and stuff. It was like look at the end like it was insane You saw a girl likes to get her ass handed to her that we know they shit kicked out of her like when you say Yeah, you're talking about like unhinged levels of getting beat up. Yes. Yeah, I like need bruises and stuff Talking Contentional non-consensual my one boy did this he he broke up with what your boy beat up. No, no I'm sorry. I'm just talking about signing up for Dating apps my one boy did this he broke up with his girlfriend's like fuck this Like I want to bang a milf and he downloaded a thing called your life doc like to the life calm

That's like a porn. Yeah, he fucking signed up for it And he's just like dude like what and he's the same guy who he signed up for like a porn ad sidebar But it's cougar like this dude like I went the first time ever went to a strip club It was with him and like he came back from the back He goes to the chick said she had the biggest dick. She's ever seen So he goes on cougar life and he's like talking about dude, there's all these like I don't know what you're talking about It's not fake. There's all these chicks. I'm like, bro. It's fake and I was like, how do you know? There's chicks like they send me pictures and I was like, oh, you didn't send them pictures, right?

He's like, I mean, yeah, I sent a picture. I was like, you're probably sending a dude a picture Cougar life dot com. Did you ever meet up with a cougar? No, he was like on one of those sidebars That's like me try not to come in your area Literally cougar life dot com and they're sending him hot cougar pics BLM dude bang local mils I Saw that Sticker yeah, such an office today. I saw a pornhub bumper sticker I

Feel for the bro's are on the side The like old head boomers that just got on the Facebook when they discover pornhub, it's gonna be over. It's over dude They are dude. That's what I wanted to do. I want to I want to get like no horses Like your birthday party, right your birthday. I'm talking 75 year olds your birthday party coming up Yeah, I want to just hit the fucking drum kick and see if any of them pop up I think they're all like literally I have a theory they're all Claiming computer literacy and when no one's around dude, they're like they're on their phone It's just like Batman's hideout

And then it's like immediately What's that they're fraught as fuck dude if you hand me a phone like They were all there was like jerk mags and all this shit They were going for it in the fucking 60s and 70s when they're with the boomers the porn like bro They were stashing the difference between like dude. I'm telling you. They like the tactile. Yo, I'm telling you when like our dads Were older only a fraction of them were porn hounds. Yeah, I try to say this that I got shut down on that No, Matt Tom's right. We've talked about as many you had like the op of getting porno In your hand as a married man man with children was like top-level fucking you had to do weird shit

You had a first risk pulling off 76 in the risk game video which you're gonna get hit by another car It's now smoke and you had to go you had to physically exist in a porn store for about 10 minutes You had to hang out with a pedophile basically. Yeah, you had to exist in a porn store Get out of the porn store and nobody could see you and then you had to get a box somewhere in your house That's why when they went they would get 50 fucking mags. Oh They might have kept him in the mechanic shop But still it was like you might have caught a fab like once a month. Yeah, but the op wasn't there It wasn't like your wife's like hey, I'm gonna go take a shower and you're like

I'm gonna look at the hardest fucking porn on the planet. Yeah, yeah You see acts like and then what's even nuttier than that was like if you were a regular dude You could go get like Playboy and penthouse But if you wanted to get like something a little more like specific Yeah, I found a velvet in the woods. It was very hardcore. You had to send away for that stuff Oh, you would have to like get a manila envelope sent to your house and monitor the male. Yeah, it's hard to accept Yeah, it should happen to me I did a clean out for Haas with Matt and there was a box of fucking porn

Single dudes looked at more porn than anyone like back then if you had like your own apartment. Oh, yeah, it was all yeah Yeah, that's why that shit open and put it under the box ring and mom found it and these were the rugged ones with like Traniads on the package Well, like I'm saying my dad was like they weren't mine either Like your dad definitely wasn't sneaking around the house with those my dad had no point. I scoured the house I did I searched through that. Yeah, I searched Every uncle's house But if I babysat for you, I flipped your fucking room

I was like some of you fuckers have porn. Yeah, none of them had none of that porn. Yeah, it was like everyone was clean CP was also one one. I won't say who one had porn one had Everything what I know I'll try to see if he says a name. No one everyone was clean across the board Yeah, even friends of fan like anyone I don't you're like a dope head. Yeah, I was like check the top hutch Check this check that it was kind of disturbing We go to someone's friends like your friend's house and their dad had porn and you'd be like I could sit down and Write a list of all the dads that had porn in our school right now. Yes It would be like it was like the five families of New York there was like five families

I remember kids would come into school. Yeah, and they'd be like dude I found my dad's porno tape and I'd be like you'll bring it in. Oh, yeah, and they would bring it in Then I'd be like this is mine That was like that was like excavating goblah. Techie. You'd be like wait. There's been a discovery Like nerd kids would be like dude. I stole his VHS off my dad. I would take it and be like what's your dad gonna do? Tell your mom. It's mine now. Oh Poor bully It was it was gold. I was true. I just I handed that shit out

I found the one night in Paris bonus features brought that in gave to my boys I told you was sick brought it back that certified may own slip it back on the portable DVD player Boink right back in your jerk set up was so fun You had the most futuristic jerk set up out of any kid It was little little DVD player, dude What will DVD player hamper upside down right at the toilet those things should be made There's a basketball Highland Lebron James rookie year bet NBA highlights that I put in it. That's the thing that was your cover Yeah, damn dude, you could go you could run the experiment to see how hard they're going on porn

Just get dad's phone. He definitely doesn't know how to do incognito mode Want to know dude that's Bill's theory is that they know how to do all they know how to do all that I think they're frowning on some computer lit it. They're only duck-duck go. Oh, yeah Dude, I mean they were I would never in a million years search that I wouldn't either what like Like dad's phone fine dad's fucking I would not like what I open up. It's like It would just be like boobs. It'd be like boobs. Good. What if it was like a guy who's had six kids, bro He's fucking beyond boobs, man. I was looking at shit up in second grade big sex calm It's the first website ever type thing

But I'm telling you since they didn't grow up with it. It's not part of it's not in there Yeah, so if I like dropped the mag in front of him, he'd be like, oh shit But if it was like hop on your face like I remember being like 13 and going for the mag that I had under my bed And it not be in there and I was literally the scary Scary I had to go downstairs and my dad was sitting at the kitchen table with it. Oh I would run my dad wasn't supposed to be home from work my mom called him I found it while I was at school and I came home and went upstairs didn't notice my dad

Dude I used to charge out of the bus to go hit this I used to edge on the bus with girls I'm not even about to put my face. This is a share room. I had my face in some mouths We're poor nannies in recovery sharing. Dude, he came off that bus like a hammerhead shark, dude I was edging the whole ride home. I remember I used to put my I used to be like finger me I just put my hand on it feel the heat on the mound and then I'd barrel off the fucking bus to try to hit this mag I got home went right upstairs mags not there fuck calm down stairs Your dad was at the table with the mag

Trippin dude, I ran right past him. I came down. He was just like sitting there with it and I was like shaking No chance dude it was open to the back ads He was like, baby, I'm gonna take a look and make sure he's now again. Also another embarrassing side note thing was glued shut on It was a Kit Kat bar. Oh, it's terrifying This thing for years. I dread these days that I'm gonna have to yeah, it's coming up. I think the shit's funny as fuck It's all phone though. It's gonna be all phone. Yeah, but I have porn bully your son No, no, I just want to hit him ahead of time and be like dude. Here's what? Yeah, what this is like this is mine now

Nice or just be like, dude, you're taking the fall Or just do a total big brother setup. I got your room cammed out if you start fapping Jesus Christ, dude So or I might just let it rip and then once he's like 11 just start going hard on the iPad Just fucking crushing on the I took a fall for some hard hardcore stuff, bro, when one of my buddies died This is the worst story one of my buddies died and there was a computer that was just like Japanese chicks puking fucking Wild shit like hard. There's a video. There's an MPEG This is back old times where there was just like little 15 second 30 second videos. Remember that? Yeah, there was just early

MPEG and it was this thing called Chloe where this chick was just go getting this Fisted both hands. So like this kid had the most hardcore shit dies. I roll up to the funeral. Faptive I took the heat I took the heat on his computer. They're like, oh, yeah, Andrew put all that shit on You protected his legacy. Yeah, that's fucking I had a shake that had to shake the parents hands look them in the eye They thought he was out there looking at Chloe. I'm just gollum. They thought you were looking at goat tea You probably got a lot of points for that another share That's why you didn't get mocking the DMT

Celebrating I'm telling you man. I have such a different experience in you man I have I like I show up and they're like, holy shit, bro. He's here. Let's fucking fix them. Yeah Yeah, I'm so I'm sorry about that. Don't be sorry. It's exactly what I needed And you always get what you need. I got exactly what I needed because I've had it all I've had like the good the bad in between Dude, I'll tell you what's not fun is when you don't smoke enough DMT and you lay in the fucking That shit fucking sucks. It's not fun. That's the worst That's the problem with Tom had with Michael Pond's book

What he wrote that as like his experience Michael Pond that whole book pissed me off You know, I guess you off it pissed me off because like he was like, oh Did all the like he like went and like nibbled on all these psychedelics. Yeah, and then try to be like Oh, here's a like it's like dude If you want to write a book about like what it's like to take acid do it ten times in the course of two years Yeah, don't go do it once take a lower dose than you should have what do you take like 200 mics? He took like a hundred mics probably I think took two hunch How many not he took I think he took like a hit-and-a-half or something you you would know it might have a spirit bond right now

We might do dude. We're definitely I know it just chiefted. No this summer dude. You got to come to the compound Dude, yeah, I mean he fears No, and then he like he just he did all these things and it could have been a really cool book But he like just dabbled with them. Yeah, and then he was like, oh, I don't know about them Like I was like right back to like my old way, but now I meditate better. It's like you took mushrooms like twice Yeah, and then he trashed Timothy Leary if I ever saw one fight He does rule he trashes him that's fucked up a lot of those guys trash leary. They trash leary cuz why does everybody tell me? He's a CIA asset. That's not true at all. Yeah, broken out jail by the weather underground

Yeah, why I'm not even gonna have I just it's just what I heard literally don't get don't get triggered, bro I'm not trigger. I'm talking about Michael Pollan. I'm gonna fuck them up You'd kick Michael Pollan's ass I Read his book you had said enough what is it amphibious assault on him you jump into the water from the I would learn to dive instantly Just so I didn't have to do my thing If you kangaroo jumped out you kangaroo penciled on him dude that would fuck him up

If you em bison him, just let you know em bison like jumps on people with his two feet There's the rarest fighters Because he always was the beat dude. Yeah, we'd play free-fire man big Vegas It's fucked up because he's scorpion every time exactly I fuck with Kang scorpion. I fuck With the good guys you guys are like oh night Hawk. I thought I was your white gill. I'm sure white gill leads you to Fuck with Johnny Cage No, you don't I do you don't fuck with Johnny

Johnny I used to play uh, what's the fucking one game on the beach? It's like it's like one of the seconds The girls are in like boy shorts. I fuck with Blanca Yeah, I fuck with ihonda Sonya chan Lee Yeah, chan Lee's nasty. There's nothing more troubling than tom's period of life. I fuck with borough You fuck with the game manhunt and you're that was like two weeks of my life He set up surround sound in our room and you gotta watch it. He's an elephant

He's a fucking there's a twin bed, bro. There's a twin bed tv twin bed Tom sets up surround sound first thing we do is listen to smashing pumpkins. It was sick obviously And then tom gets it. We got a ps2 in there. I was ripping uh san andres at the time Tom this was pre san andres. I was playing san andres. No, you're playing voice city, probably No, san andres afterwards afterwards. Okay, okay, because you wouldn't remember this Tom would I would go to sleep tom would be there was a recliner right in front of it And he would play a game called fucking manhunt, bro. It was made by rock star games. What is manhunt? It's a fucking snuff. It's fucked up. It was fucked up

It's a game that's just a snuff film And you go around killing people and at the end you're fighting like some dude who's wearing a pig skin Yeah, you just go like I never played a game. My leg you turned me on to some game and I got hooked on the rhythm of the game What happened when you moved back in was that financial or did you hit like an existential It was a mixture of like Being a drunk It wasn't so much financial because I was making I was working at the beach over there killing it

I was making money. I just was like such a drunk. Yeah that like Yeah, that grinch belly. Yeah, I just was a drunk. I got yeah, I wasn't thinking Yeah, you know, I wasn't like, what am I gonna do next? It was just like, oh my apartment's up and then like I somehow got a dog at some point. Yeah, I was like fuck. I'm juicy. I juicy. Yeah And then I just like I was just a slump. I was just like did you ever black out at the parents house during that time? Dude one time we would walk to the bar up the street. Yeah. Yeah and get so drunk And then like piss on the like it was like I was still like college living in their house for like a month Tom pissed the hallway when he was like 27 28. Yeah, I do remember coming in one time. You're you're in the living room

It's a share the best ever was dude the day before Easter We went out and got fucking hammered and then we were in the bathroom brushing our teeth and we had promethazine And I was like it was in there and I picked it up like fucking with it. Oh, is that the wrapper stuff? Yes, it's a purple syrup and tom was like drink that and I put my tongue on it and didn't let it go down my throat and act Like I try to put up like a tip to or like put up a foe I was like tom drink and he drank like four ounces. I drank like half the bottle while drunk, dude It was in your easter mass slump. I was in the easter mass like kenzoing out Like full chopped and screwed

From the night before from the night before was in there just fully chopped and screwed I was like What's that people are probably still worried. I was gonna show I was like pretending to look in my bag Dude, we gotta do ads we gotta do ads we gotta do ads. All right. Um, sorry to break this up, dude. Um, guys You guys leave it in conversation guys. You guys love nicotine, right? You guys absolutely love nicotine I mean there's great flavors Think let me tell you something about you guys like the vape you guys got to get on the lucy Lucy has losses and all kinds of stuff

Check out the full line of products at lucy.co and use the promo code drenched at checkout That's lucy.co and be sure to use that promo code drenched If you're a listener from canada lucy is now available at ca.ca.lucy.co Warning this product needs nicotine nicotine is addicted to chemical Um, also while we're at it dudes You got billy you look at it ton of fucked up porn, right? Have you ever wondered why internet access is so much cheaper these days?

It's because internet service providers aren't just making money off subscription fees They're also making money from spying on your internet activity bill No, and selling your history to date and dated of big tech companies. There's four pulling back at you, bro So what's the best way to make sure 100% of your data is encrypted and then your isp can't get a hold of don't be a Can't get hold of it. You're in that server, right? You guess it express vpn Express vpn creates a secure tunnel between all your devices and the internet so that everything you do online is encrypted It reroutes your connection through a secure server All your isp internet service provider can see is that you're connected to an express vpn server. That's it

Express vpn works on all your devices tablet smart TVs Even your router so your entire family can stay protected That's what's up. That is what's up Dude, how hard does your porn habit have to be that you have to get a vpn, dude Do that your capital storming guys. I can't I can't stress this that whole ad. I was like, I even might need this guys Guys, I can't stress this enough express vpn It's so simple to use you just open up the app tap one button to connect and that's it Protect your online activity today with a vpn read number one by business insider visit our exclusive link express vpn

Dot com slash drenched so you get an extra three months free on a one-year package. That's expre ss vpn dot com slash drenched All right, so that's it also dude. I just got to do this isn't a real ad. It's just a freeze pipe, dude These guys gardeni can you fucking slay this freeze pipe real quick? It's already Freeze pipe sent us a free bong and they had an ad read but i'm just gonna dude It's on the house freeze pipe. You don't got to pay for this just this is a phenomenal bong I have to say dude. This is legitimately changed the parents and they're away, right? Oh for sure

This is we spoke to mt before Yeah, this is the for a glycerin coil right there. The smoke's flying through it dude. It keeps it so nice and that was a hit There you go, is it smooth? If you cough it makes it stronger freeze pipe freeze pipe dot com dude freeze pipe is a superior bong Bill hold your breath. Oh my breath. Oh, yeah, I fucking passed the drug test. I can hold my breath for fucking two minutes Okay, I had to clear it. Let me do All right, sorry, I hate doing it. You know, you know, I hate doing that. Yeah, I read, you know I hear you gotta do you know, like i'm gonna promote my shit. Empi campers

I thought I was like now My like quasi legal weed dude. I hate I ate one of those gummies recent Do you ever the one thing that sucks bad is when you're super tired and you eat a weed edible anyway? Yeah, for me it does dude. I just get so confused. Yeah, you get like grouchy and like Dude, I do that a lot if I like smoke weed It's like the end of the night and I go take the trash out and then I'll be like I should smoke a joint while I'm out here Dude, and then I'll come back in and just I'm like weird and grouchy and have to go to bed

Dude, I gobbled a couple of those. Yeah, I'm just I gobbled a couple of those gummies recently and I was like I was so fucking tired and like straight like It was just insane, dude. I was like to the changa I mean not to say that you shouldn't go to hempycambers.com, but I also not here to promote my shit Yeah, for sure here for my brother for sure really cool t-shirts. So really cool t-shirt I mean a lot of a lot of faithful customers like to thank dude if I if I could I need it. What pause? Walked right into that Tom got me exposed to dinner one time

Because we were talking shit at the dinner table and tom was saying eat me all this shit I was just like I just figures like some good slam and like I think tom or someone said something at dinner. I was like eat me and everyone's like, what? When was this for I was in chitester basketball clinic because Bucket meals? No, I really exposed myself there because I told a dude to eat me in front of a chick I was like, yeah, eat me and this chick the dude just like, do you know what that means? I was like, yeah, it's like, what's it mean? I was like, fucking eat me, dude. I don't know

I feel like dude said that back in the night. Dude, you eat me. Tom got me, but then they were like dude It means a pussy. It's like fuck. No, it doesn't that's what I was told when I was like just their basketball, maybe Yeah, in charge of the basketball. There was definitely The coach was eating me all the way. Was that your boy? Who was that dude? Yeah, he got in trouble He was apparently he was like squirting. He would like go in and like squirt the row chill It's fucked up. He was squirting. He was a coaching girls basketball high school girls basketball team Yeah, running a very his basketball camp was good. I separate the basketball camp for the coach But dude, he would like go in the shower and just squirt them with vo5 may hurry up ladies and like you vo5

Shampoo, dude. He never knew the struggle dude. Hey, you weren't there never do this job. Where was you dude? Where was you dude? We had a vo5 Albert to vo5 all you've known is Pantene Pro. Billy doesn't use shampoo. What are you talking about? You know what vo5 is? I use natural shampoos. Do you? Yeah, dude, you put me on a not using shampoo. I haven't washed my hair in like two months No, it's good for you. It's good for your the oils in your hair. Obviously. You don't wash your hair I once a week, maybe Billy put me on and I washed my hair. Yeah, you can not do it. I I did it for a while and after like Two months, it was like, all right, I should pro I need to wash my hair at least once a month

I just do it once a week. You really put me on some hair tips. All right Yo, me and bill are both hitting the belly buttons. Yeah, so we're going away. I'm going sitting bull I got another piece of turquoise coming Billy's going to handle bar braids. Yeah I'm never cut my hair again. You should till like fucking next year. I'm like, I'd fuck this Where are we at right now? 57 minutes Sweet, let's wrap this up in an hour. We'll we'll do round out the hour and slide into the page You mind if I drain the main drain the main actually Yeah, we'll just we'll just go to the page. Oh my god. We'll just go to a real page family, dude