Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast - Ep 407 - SUDs (feat. SWIM & Dru Montana)

Episode Date: September 1, 2022

Support the D.A.W.G.Z. @ patreon.com/MSsecretpod Support Dru @patreon.com/duragandthedeertag  Buy Merch @ mssecretpodcast.com/merch hempycampers.com shanemgillis.com YO. sup? We back in Philly / Stoner Dadz HQ. The Big Kahun' is away on bitniss. So Cusk held it down (obviously) with SWIM and our good bro Dru Montana. Please enjoy.  Support the show and get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code DRENCHED at https:// Manscaped.com  Support the show by downloading the DraftKings Sportsbook App and using the code DRENCHED. If you or someone you know has a gambling problem, crisis counseling and referral services can be accessed by calling 1-800-GAMBLER (1-800-426-2537) (IL/IN/LA/MI/NJ/PA/WV/WY), 1-800-NEXT STEP (AZ), 1-800-522-4700 (CO/NH), 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org/chat (CT), 1-800-BETS OFF (IA), 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY), visit OPGR.org (OR), call/text TN REDLINE 1-800-889-9789 (TN), or 1-888-532-3500 (VA).   21+ (18+ NH/WY). Physically present in AZ/CO/CT/IL/IN/IA/LA(select parishes)/MI/NH/NJ/ NY/OR/PA/TN/VA/WV/WY only. New customer offer void in NH/OR/ONT-CA. $200 in Free bets: New customers only. Valid 1 per new customer. Min. $5 deposit. Min $5 wager. $200 issued as eight (8) $25 free bets. Ends 9/19/22 @ 8pm. Early Win: 1 Early Win Token issued per eligible game. Opt in req. Token expires at start of eligible game. Min moneyline bet $1. Wagering limits apply. Wagers placed on both sides of moneyline will void bet. Ends 1/8/23 @ 8pm ET. See terms at sportsbook dot draftkings dot com slash football terms.

Yeah, Bezos have never eaten soy sauce. That's not true. I've seen you consume soy. I've never consumed soy in my life. That's just patently. It makes you lactate. I found that out when I was like nine. They never touched it.

Some people claim that's not true. Yellow five, I've never touched. Dude, and I know, I know what Adamame is and I like it. Yeah. I know exactly what it means. You probably start lactating. Yeah. Do you think so?

No, that's. A second that the yellow five thing dropped, I stopped eating it. Bullshit. And you can see it in my balls, man. I've seen you do the do. You've never seen my ball. You've never seen me drink Mountain Dew. I've seen you do the do.

Maybe in like third grade, not since my balls. That was before you knew. Once I found out, I never touched yellow five again. Banana runs. Toast them. Every single you've never had. You've definitely had yellow five since then. I've not touched.

Wait, what's yellow five? It's a food dye. So you've ever had cake at like a family party? That was a street cake? No, not at yellow five. Bullshit. I've seen you eat that, too. I've seen you eat that, too.

You've had yellow five, dude. I had soy sauce, too. So I could. Yeah, tamari is just also soy sauce, anyway. But yeah, what? Tamari is like the gluten-free soy sauce. But it's still a soy in it. It does.

You're a heavy soy, dude. Dude, what? No, I'm not. I used to avoid it. Then I stopped because if yours mask is me, it's not going to do anything. It's not going to affect you. I actually need it to kind of counterbalance me.

You're like Jones. I'm pretty masked. So I like it. My doctor's orders. You ever get the spins from like too much tea running through you? All the time, all the time, all the time. Too much tea? All the time.

Testosterone? Dude, if I go, I'm on the seventh floor here right now. If you put me on like the 15th floor, if I just start like formulate and play, I have to, I can't be like, I can only be a certain height within a building. Dude, my testosterone levels are so low. I thought we were talking about like English breakfasts and craze. I was like, never in my life do you get the spins?

Fucking relax, dude, drink less of it. It is, dude. I want to get shots. I don't know where to go. Dude, do you start juicing? Also, Drew Montana, CEO of Heavy Camper. What about him? CEO, student, student,

student, returning. Scientist. Student, scientist. How was your orientation process? It was just mostly lab safety. And that was your orientation to the entire school? Well, I skipped like the real orientation. Okay.

I didn't go. I was like, what are they, you know, I don't need to go. What the hell, dude? This is your second shot at fucking education. Yeah, but I mean, it was, it's all like, I'm just trying to get the lab points. So like, I didn't want to go through like, you know. Real orientation would just be like you and a bunch of 18 year olds, right?

Not a community college. Okay. The age spans all over the place. We got everybody. Like, I'm not even the oldest dude in there. Nice. Yeah. There's some people that are older than me.

Nice. And there's like, I'd say the median age is 20. Really? It's mostly people going to school for physical therapy that want to transfer to like Penn State. That's because we did like the icebreaker session and everyone was like, I believe they're called whores. What?

These wrestling dudes. Or just dumb athletes. They want to go to Penn State. I'm sure they do it. Kinesiologists and whatnot. Do you think they finally get to the state and like, they're just like hammered one night at Penn State? And they're like, it was all worth it.

I didn't think all that cruelling community college was all worth this last year. Like they try to party like the kids that have been there for two years. Oh, really? Did you ever party at Penn State? Once. It's fucking weird. It's insane. Like the drunker people get,

the more they just start screaming, we are and shit. Yeah. And you're like, I don't know. That's anywhere that likes sports though. It's like the military. Yeah. It'll be the spring and people are screaming, go birds at a fucking Philly bar.

Yeah. Penn State. Relax. Penn State is weird for everything else. It's isolated. It's just like, you're up there. It's like the military for alcoholics. And people get real into the blue and white.

They do. You have nothing else to get into. No one wants to talk about the pedophilia. But I was up there before it broke. Yeah. I was up there probably. I had a feeling something was going on back there. You were up there?

Yeah. I was like, dude, something's going on up there. Whoa. This is before it happened? Yeah. I was like, something about that program had me kind of being like, dude, something's kind of suss about this program.

Smell fishy. Dude, I'm going to suss that dude out. I'm not going to obviously name any names, but someone we know. So what would you do in this situation? Someone we know. Someone you two know or me and you know. You and I know.

Someone, a youngster. Pedophilia? He's going to school. No, no. I'm good. I don't smoke high CBD legal weed like you do for age-restricting purposes. This is big gas.

Big gas in the blood. I appreciate it. I appreciate it. Do you let us go D8 on YouTube? Dude, I don't know. They just don't as age-restrict you like crazy. The technocrats are out of control. That's true.

But dude. You got to call your boys like substance. But I've talked about him before. He's fucked up right now. I say he's back. He's back? Yeah. He's not.

He wasn't having a good time. The algorithm constantly feeds me him and I'm like, I'm trying to write YouTube. I'm not. I don't want to fuck with this guy. Stop sending me his videos. Click the thing. But I click on his video to fucking just

do like the fuck he talking about now. So yeah, they're right. Get me again. They're right. Dude, so we know there's a situation right now I'm trying to figure out. We know someone, they're younger, they're in school and they're going like they're pretty young

and they're having a male teacher now who like all the kids were like looking forward to. We were talking about this. Oh yeah. Yeah. Pull the mic up a little closer to you. My bad. My bad.

It's a so a female student is in the hot male teacher's class. I don't haven't seen if this guy's hot or not. But they were like. He's cool. He's cool. They're too young to say he's hot. Yeah. Yeah.

They're young. I'm talking young. Oh. So it's like it's it's this cool male teacher in a grade school and like we're trying to figure out if it's appropriate to roll up on him and be like what the fuck. I already told I already dropped the message. What do you like the student told me she was like

oh I got the cool teacher this year. And I was like tell me your uncle wants to meet him and see what he's all about. Give him that message. Ver fucking beat him. Like hey my uncle wants to meet you and see what you're about. You got to meet this guy like he's a prom date dude. Just cock the shotgun.

That was the fucking teacher. It's more like so I just I want to just I wanted to have them have her tell him like yo my entire family thinks you're very sus. Like they want to they genuinely want you to come. She's a younger student. Very young. How old are we talking. We're talking like single-dig.

Yeah. Oh yeah. Super young. So I want her to be like yo invite him over for dinner and all of us just grill him like are you a fucking pedophile or what dude like what's your fucking deal. Yeah. What's your twist.

Maybe he's from another time dude. He might just love education. That was cool in the medieval times dude. Maybe he's in a period piece. I don't know. He's gonna be cool dude. I want him to just love education. No one loves education.

Yeah it's true. Yeah who loves education is like I'm trying. I'm saying on the off chance I'm not going to give them that better than now. I'm going to. That's what I'm saying. I'm vigilant. I'm pulling up on.

I'm going to James O'Keeffe the school. I'm going to project Veritas. Dude that's those videos are the fucking funniest shit. I that's like they've completely infiltrated my algorithm. What James O'Keeffe. James O'Keeffe. Project Veritas. Because he just he tricks dudes into thinking like a chick

wants to fuck him. Yeah. Everything. It's the oldest trick in the book dude. Is he the oldest trick in the book. Is he like a youtube pedophile hunter. No that dude's cool. The dude with the hand tats.

He never shows his face. That dude fucking rules. I actually might connect him. I might give him a tip like yo there's a school. This guy's fucking sausage shit dude. But yeah James O'Keeffe he just sends in the honey pot. He sends in the honey pot and he gets these dudes like just like dudes and like button down polo shirts just fucking

spill the beans. He gets like three coarse lights and they'll be like Pfizer blah blah blah blah blah. You get one chick who's like I mean I want to see how hot these I mean I guess you don't want to give away the field operatives but it's like right dude. They're probably not that hot. He probably has like him dialed in where it's like he is the master.

He's like let's he like sees who works at Google. Yeah. And then he's like all right go talk to him about hunter's laptop and he goes and finds a chick who he would be like she's out of my league but maybe true three beers plus that equation and he's like well also answered the whole laptop. Those dudes always they always have like a modicum of like power within their sphere.

So it does make sense to them. They're like some girl wants to like hang in like chat. Oh yeah because I don't know do they come at them as reporters. No no no they like I think they get jobs there. What I don't know. There's no way they would say they're a reporter. I don't know man. I don't I don't fuck with the Veritas heavily enough.

Fuck with it hard dude. I get let down like Billy is always my dude watch like they're about to fucking raid the like it's just funny because they literally will never come through. It would always be like it's not this isn't like that. This is what I'm saying like Project Veritas will get someone from a huge company to admit that like some injectable thing. Everyone ignores it.

Everyone ignores everything they said. I know they'll be like nobody cares. We knew it's just so funny. We knew that this like unnamed injectable medicine from 2020 was going to kill everyone. No it's not like that. But I'm saying like that they'll drop the heaviest knowledge and then the news is just like dude you see like so and so

admitted that and everyone's like like fuck that fucking Kim Kardashian fell off a bike. You know I know but it's like 10 million views. What do you got? He got one guy basically being like we're just going to keep hammering this down their throat so we don't know. One guy came out like who knows who cares it's all about pressure and the kids but yeah the that stuff it's just funny

when he confronts them and they're like I don't want to do this. He got the guy some dude went out and had like a he was drinking like a sex on the beach staring at like sitting across from a chick and was sitting there being like yeah we don't hire Catholics and he went to a restaurant the dude was at. It was like yo what's good dude I'm James McKee if you don't hire Catholics that's against the law bro. Article 2B5A56 Connecticut law dude and the guy starts

being like I don't consent to this and he's like dude I'm a reporter. He just stands there like I'm a reporter looking for the answers and they obviously come and he's like you're a wrestler and a reporter and they're like dude it's fucking stop. And he sounds like the problem dude. James McKee.

That is cool dude he nailed this guy. There's a lot of entrapment going on here. I mean it's entrapment that's fine. Yeah it's like this is my biggest thing. These dudes are trying to be too cool for pussy and they do deserve it's like bro you're trying to be too cool for pussy that's what I'm fired up. Do they at least get some pussy?

No dude it's a full honeypot operation. It's a full honeypot. It's a full honeypot. So these guys come out and just literally like fuck their careers up over like two drinks with like a probably kind of a hot chick. This guy for some reason they were talking. She was like do you hire Catholics?

And he was like no we don't hire them. We just throw the resumes away. He's like they're brainwashed. He came out like why don't you hire Catholics dude. It's fucked up dope. Yeah it's pretty tight. So they wouldn't hire shy. Huh?

They wouldn't hire shy. Yeah that's what I'm saying. You're telling me as a school teacher you wouldn't hire shy. LaBouf. I can't wait to see him play PO dude. I can't he's the best actor of our generation. Dude I he has me I want to join AA.

You should join AA dude. I want to I don't but I I'll get. You can get something dude. What do you think? I mean just go through your week and make a like journal and then pick what vice you did the most. Join that. Yeah that's true but I dude I get so jealous so that he did the

talk with the pre with the bishop. That was pretty tight. Did you see his talk with the guy from The Walking Dead has a podcast? I didn't see it. His name is Shane. It's like that's a character from The Walking Dead. He doesn't watch a single episode of that show. Is it good?

Which one is Shane? Shane's the guy who like kind of goes wild. A bit of a mad dog. Okay. Don't want to give a spoiler but he's the dude's like big time buddy who fucks his own. Oh yeah yeah yeah. Dude I fucking hate that guy.

He's the worst in everything he's in. Well he's yeah I've only seen him in that and yeah he was a pretty bad. He did fuck that guy's wife. He stinks dude. Is it a good movie? Is it worth watching? No.

Walking Dead? Yeah it's kind of fun and then all of a sudden it becomes like a comic book. The first 15 episodes are good and then the next 15 are the first 15 just in a different place. Killing zombies or something? That's the entire show yeah. I was never in a zombies but you watch it and it's like it's pretty sick.

It's pretty fun and then it does. It just becomes like so fucking crazy. Once they killed the Asian guy I was out. I was like this is fucking. Like on principle? Yeah dude they just had no. Glenn dude. Glenn was the man.

Yeah I mean I'm big on like Asian representation in Hollywood. Yeah. And I don't I don't I like seeing like we need more cool alpha Asians and stuff. Yeah I feel that. That's something I see that fucking grinds my gears. Yeah dude. Personally. Why is Jackie Chan not actually kicking zombie ass?

That's the question. What do you mean? He could be in that movie or in that show. Isn't he dead? Jackie Chan. No way dude. He's dead. He's dead.

Brandon I hope not. You think it was Brandon Lee? Brandon no I think Bruce Lee. Bruce Lee and Brandon Lee are dead. His son died? His son died while filming the crew. This might have been before your time. He got shot on set.

He got shot on set. By who? Alec Baldwin. Damn bro. Same deal it was like a loaded thing but it was like but his dad died on set too because the camera a lighting rig fell on. What? Bruce Lee got killed by a lighting rig that fell on him.

Wait no really? I'm like 95% sure if we got fact checkers. I thought he had a heart attack dude. What? No Bruce Lee didn't have a heart attack. How would he have a heart attack? Yeah he's like so fit. It's a martial arts.

Brad Pitt kicked his ass in that movie though. Brad Pitt beat his ass. Would you watch the Hollywood movie once my time in Hollywood? You didn't see that movie? That was so fucking good. I'm watching Veritas bro. I'm trying to break the truth out of the people. You're trying to get the Catholics back down.

I'm trying to see horny dudes and khaki spill the beans dude. But yeah I'm pretty sure Bruce Lee had a lighting rig fall on him. And then Brandon Lee while filming the crow got shot with what should have been blanks. This is a Bruce Lee died at age 32 in Hong Kong from a brain edema probably caused by a prescription painkiller. That was that. Debunked. That was that dude.

I'm sorry. He had a brain heart attack dude. I thought he got killed by a light. I think the light fell on him and that's why he started taking painkillers. That could be. Possibly because he had a brain edema. I was like what the fuck is that? What was he on?

I'm not sure. Perks or something. Hercules. If I had those 512 Hercules. But Brandon Lee definitely got killed on set. Yeah he got killed here. While filming the crow. Fuck dude that movie was so sick too.

I never saw it. The crow. Only Goths loved it. I never saw it. Hot topic crowd loved it. Oh they still put the movie out after he died? Yeah they like wrapped up because they had enough going. Hell yeah.

I think they went to like let's get one more clip of this one shot in the beginning and he died. What are they doing with the Alec Baldwin movie? Are they still putting that out? That's coming out. I don't know. Are they still coming out? They better. Straight to blu-ray.

They better. They fucking better. I guess they better. What's up with him? They should go out. They should bring that out and sell it and like target like a wire rack. He's chilling. Alec Baldwin's like doing podcasts and he just had Tim Dillon on his podcast.

A couple weeks ago. He had Tim Dillon on his podcast? Yeah. But then it come out that he did in fact shooter? Yeah. Oh no he did it. Oh yeah. What's Baldwin just like?

Doesn't doesn't even acknowledge it. He's chilling dude. I guess that's all you can do at that point. When you shoot a lady on set? Yeah. And then deny it and then get debunked? No he said he did it. No he said I didn't pull the trigger.

He cried and was like I never pulled that trigger. He said the gun just went off? He said the gun just went off. That's a bad story. That's a fucking real shitty story. And then like they came out forensically and they were like now you did pull the trigger. Yeah.

I mean either way he was going to beat it because he thought it was fake. So why wouldn't you just be honest? Like dude if you guys not ever held a fake gun like you're of course going to pull the trigger. Yeah. Of course. I would have just been I think he was like ha ha bang bang. Yeah. Like killed her.

It wasn't a fake gun. It was a real gun though. Should have had blanks. Yeah I guess I guess so. I'm a big gun safety guy dude. I saw that. I'm a big gun. I had a comment.

It took everything of me not to comment on that. You're a big anti-2a head too. What's anti-2a? Like handing your guns like gun roundups gun buybacks. No way dude. What dude? Typical city live. What the fuck are you talking about dude?

Matt are you a traitor? Are you against the second amendment dude? That's not true at all. He's a big like AR-15s or only. No way. Matt don't fuck with bump stocks dude. That's not true. I'm being literally slandered.

I'm literally being slandered. What is going on here dude? I'm just trying to make up for him. I'm not I'm fucking. Debunking my huge balls. No eating the other five. I'm highly litigious dude. Insanely litigious.

So you're the opposite. You want everyone to have 100 round drums on the glizzies. Yeah you're with it. I don't care. Yeah it doesn't bother me. Matt's with the shit. I feel like I'm more worried about like I feel like I could talk anyone out no matter what your armaments were.

I feel like I could just be like whoa brother what are you doing? Whoa brother. What the hell? I don't think it works like that all the time. Brother what are we even doing here right now? You're like a gun to the head talk them down to me. That's what I'm more like that. I'm basically Pio.

I feel like this is the first time I've ever had a fucking gun in my face. It's one of my daydreams constantly. Do you think it's the first time for them to put a fucking gun on me brother? Fuck you. Come on do it. If you get carjacked at a Sonoko midnight are you talking them down or are you just like have it brother? I'm going brother.

Hey I'd be like have it dude. My man. What are we doing brother? What are we doing? While it's in here and I sweet talk the entire time. Like do you not know I'm on Matt and Shane's secret podcast brother? No I'm just telling you brother you don't guys do this. Hey dude get on the Patreon.

I can get you on the page. I'll get you in on the dollar thing. Bro just wait till he adds a month. Please wait till he adds a month. I've only had a gun on me one time and I had like. Who put that thing on you? Me and Phil were on the porch. Oh yeah.

And I had this plumber doing all this work and then I like got paid that day so I had like 1200 bucks in my pocket and I had to meet the plumber in the morning who had already done the work. So like I come home from work I should have went inside. But instead I sat down on the porch this kid comes up and like pulls a gun on us. He's like empty your pockets. Damn. And I was like I just got the droid too.

Shit. From like Billy gave it to me so he literally just gave me the droid too that day. So I was like. It's away the droid. I was like fuck I can't give you this 1200 bucks bro. Like it's already spent on some plumbing issue I had yesterday. Yeah. So I was like dude I got the droid too you want that instead.

I don't have anything in my pocket. And he was like fuck you give me the droid too. So I just tossed the droid too and he split. You got deboned dude that sucks. But like I still had my other phone. I was literally 12 hunch. I was really. I had the 1200 still in my pocket.

Nice. He never took it but I was just like looking. I'm like man I can go switches at the rising store tomorrow. I'm like checking out the droid too. The dude pulled the gun out. So I was like here take the droid too. Do you ever have a heat on you. Once dude over a half ounce of weed.

And I was like you can have this. Put the heat on you. This kid and he graduated from my high school. And then he was like still around. That's how I knew he was bad business dude. 00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:12,080 Yeah. You can't hang around with those dudes.

Yeah. But he was like yeah I need a half ounce. And then we went up some stairs. And then when he got to the top of the stairs. He just turned around with it on him. And I was like five stairs away from the top. And I was like you're good. Like he already had the weed.

So it wasn't like. He just didn't want to give me like the 80 bucks. But he could have just locked the door. And that would have been easier. You know what I mean. Yeah but he wanted to flash that thing. Yeah. And he's like dude this is my weed now.

Yeah. You're like all right. Yeah there are dudes like that. There was a couple dudes who would do that to drug like the high schoolers back in the day. Who were like there was always one guy who would like pull a fucking like gun or a knife or something over like an eighth. And you're like dude.

Yeah. Dude it was such a little amount that I wasn't like. Even in the time I wasn't scared he was going to shoot me. I was just like all right you can. I'm not going to make this. Like yeah what are you doing. I'm not going to chill with you anymore. Yeah.

I immediately called my boys and said that. I'm like dude that guy Chris is a fucking a dub dude. We can't hang with him no more. He's fucking pulled the thing on me. He's beat dude. That is a beat move. That's such a beat move. I was beat dude.

He got me. He got you. Checkmate. In the stairwell. Imagine he murdered you over that. It would have stunk. I would have fallen down 20 stairs dude. That would have been worse.

Just got god fathered for like 14 grams of weed. Yeah. It was probably short too. The bag was probably short. It was. It was bad weed. Really. We were giving out radji back then for sure.

It sucks. But yeah I'm going to join. I think I'm going to join AA. All right. Just for access to six. Dude if you watch the Shia LaBeouf with the guy from Walking Dead. Are they both AA heads? He's got to be.

I don't know. The other guy I can't say for sure. But like dude they're both going back and forth. And just the level of sayings is like. Dude they have the best sayings. It's fucking dude. He's like shy there. He's like yeah I'm on the beach.

This guy's like don't fucking bullshit me dude. You can't. And he's like you know I'm putting on a performance. He's like yeah you can stop all that. Dude just get the big book. The big book. Yeah. Yeah but the slang you get from the dudes.

All in it I think. Nah dude he was like. He's like yeah but he like. He had this. This guy gave him a tape. He listened to the tape. He got this. Like it was like this old Zen story.

And he like came back in two days later. His like girlfriend broke up with him. He's like usually I'd spaz. But this time I was just kind of like whatever. So he listened to that like story. So he comes in he's like yo this shit's fucking working. They're like yo you're pink clouding bro. You're pink clouding.

And I was like. What's that mean? This just means like you're just. Clat like rosy. Pink cloud is when you're just kind of being like. Yo this is it. This is it. It's working.

Yeah I'm doing it. You're pink cloud. You haven't done it a year. He had a dude apparently went to him. It was like where you got to get rid of your cell phone. You got to dump. If you have a girlfriend get rid of her. He's like you can't do anything.

And then within that like talking to that dude. He joined a spiritual group on Zoom. And then met the director of PO. The director of PO was like bro. Making this. You got to play PO. So Shilah booze completely sober now. Yeah.

It was booze his problem. Yeah I think it was definitely booze. You know usually there's a little. I don't want to smite the man. But usually there's some blow kicking around there. Yeah but booze is like the main. It's a cornerstone. Yeah.

But usually a lot of times that the alcohol enters the booze or enters the coke. And then it's like you can get power to drink. But I do the interviews is them being like. It's really funny to watch him be like. And he was like don't fucking don't fucking bullshit me brother. Just get a DUI. I could.

And then go to meetings. I could. I could just go to a meeting. I might just front. And then any time they had back. I can't talk. Now you can share. Just be like.

I'm still counting days. Count days. That's like. What means you're freshly sober. Count days. I'm just counting days. You know I'm still counting days. And you like you see people you know getting chipped

and you're pumped. You're like yo you're getting chipped. Yeah you know dude. I did it for like 90 days. You what. Well with the CBD have I like had to sit in the rooms. Did you. I had to go to work the programs you fuck around.

I fucked around. Oh you got fake chips. No so what I did was like. They since like given my situation. Of like the first dude to ever go to rehab. That didn't have a drug problem for CBD. For legit. Like I sat down with the director and was like dude.

Like I don't want to fuck with you. I know everyone tells you this. I really don't have a drug problem. It's like sure. And she was like I explained my situation. And she was like all right just fucking go on the zoom calls because this is like an insurance. Yeah all right cool.

So I would just like every morning. I would like. Fire up the zoom call. And then just go about my death. So you got a hot piss for CBD. For CBD. And then happens. It like I went through a meeting with like the school board

and stuff and they were like all right dude. Like you know we get it. I had like you know I was like here's my license. I'm a hemp farmer. Here's the test that says there's THC in it. Here's a test that says it's legal. Here's your handbook. So the handbook for driving a bus said.

You CBD only with extreme caution. Yeah. So I had Lyme disease. And it was COVID so we weren't driving buses. Yeah. So they called us all in. I think they were trying to like thin the herd. Because they literally had a meeting

about how we might not go back to school for another two years. This was like peak fucking. Yeah. COVID-19. And then they were like oh everyone's getting drug tested today too. And I'd been taking like probably 60 milligrams

of CBD twice a day. Okay. Because I was having like a. Hulk dose. Joint pain. Hulk dose. Two big doses just to like because I can move. Yeah.

And has Lyme's that fucked up. Oh I'm so fucked up. Really. It's so it's a. You know there's a group of people trying to say Lyme's is like an actual like sick plug-in for your body and like it helps you out. I could see that.

There's people being like now it's actually like good for you. They're just coping because like you're fucked up. Yeah. I've heard it's nasty dude. It's my bad to cut you off. Rob Cruise had a tick on his dick one time. And it buried itself in there. The guy that I do the podcast with a shout out to Rob.

So he didn't get it out of his dick hole. No he pulled it out. It was in his dick hole or in his dick. He pulled the it was in his in his shaft. And he pulled the body out and the head stayed in there. You get dick on. I think he did. Do you get a target on his dick.

I don't know dude. You'll have to ask. I'll have to ask you dude. You have to be packing to see a target on your dick. Whenever I hear about ticks or Lyme disease. So I have to tell people my boy Rob had a tick on his dick. My bad continued. I would have kept it dude.

That counts. 00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:27,280 That's increased size in girth. Yeah it's like that's increased size. That's an extra bump. Well yeah but when I went in there. So like I was doing the zoo meetings online right on like. But I was also harvesting hemp and stuff.

Sure. During that time. So if it rained. And I couldn't work out in the hemp field. I was like fuck I'm going to the meeting. So I would drive down. And just fucking chill in the room. Oh in the actual.

You had the option to zoom or be in the room. Yeah I could go to the room if I wanted to. Yeah. So I would drive down and just fucking go sit in the room. And then on Fridays I had to go there and piss in a cup. So every Friday I would just go to the meeting. Because it was like kind of cool. Yeah fucking rules.

Like you would tell stories. I kept trying to promote micro dosing in there. And they were not having it. Yeah. And I was like dudes. Don't want to sound like a psychopath. But psychedelics can get rid of all of this. And they'd be like Tom please stop.

I'd be like I can't do that. Yeah that's a hot debate in the sober community. Yeah it is. It's like there's people who are like no nothing. And other people who are more. They call themselves the harm reductionists. We're like nah bro like. But I was like just talking to them.

I was like dude this could you know. If you want to get out of this here's another way to do this. And they were just like dude stop or else you can't come here anymore. So they were trying to tell me that I couldn't come to the meetings anymore. It had to do Zoom if I kept up my antics in the room. Really. They're not in a friendly way. Everything was very friendly.

They were like dude we're gonna put you back on Zoom. You should have went there and started selling subs and shit. You know what was weird. In the rooms you weren't allowed to bring monster energy drinks. Really. Because they said dudes would come to meetings and drink like nine monster energy drinks. And be just as fucked up if they like smoked man. That's the right dude.

But they banned they were like no more monsters. No more monsters. But you can have coffee though right. You could drink coffee which is fucked up. Yeah. Yeah this place sounds like no fun dude. Because they drink like 90 coffees. And the only thing that's cool is people tell these wild fucking stories.

What about rock stars. Can you drink rock stars. I think all of like brand specific. I think you just can't come in with the tall boys screw top metal cans. Like no this is different. It does get people itching though. Yeah. Because the lady there told me that people would come in with like four of them parked next to them.

And just like crack like you know the big fat Red Bulls. They would just fucking down like five Red Bulls. And just be like skits it in the meeting. I feel I always feel for dudes that need to escape their consciousness that hard. But like you're here to get rid of a cocaine and booze problem. And you just drank nine Red Bulls. Yeah. But there's dudes that are just like I feel good when I do this.

Yeah. And they're like what the fuck man. I got I need to do something. I got to have something. Yeah. I was I watched I drove up to New York yesterday up and back and I watched like a four hour video. I mean there's this video. It was long.

It was about the Christian archetypes like Jungian stuff. But the stuff they talk about is like how basically we all have this gatekeeper in our brains that like decides what we let out what we don't let out. So there's like there's like your personality is basically a mask. Yeah. There's a ton of other stuff that like doesn't see the light of day. And it's just it's really funny thinking about how there are dudes who are just like pretty much everybody.

You have to keep so much of that stuff back. Yeah. And then what happens is when you keep too much of the wrong stuff back, you just start doing like the craziest shit. You can't make sense of why you're doing it. Why? Because you're battling up all the wrong stuff. Your organisms and your organisms rebelling against your persona.

So you have an entire organism you have to answer to. But you're like no, no, no, no, I'm just like this is who I am. I don't do that. I don't hold bodies like no, you're not bro. And then they go do it. You start getting fucked up. Like a lot of that's what the whole point is. A lot of those dudes who are like, I'm just sober.

I don't fucking touch it. That's all you're thinking about all day. And you're building up the counter position, which is like, you'd be like, I want to get fucked up. And you're like, yeah, they keep pushing. Eventually just fucking breaks out. Or it goes into like another channel. But you'll get like ridiculously into lifting weights and reading the Bible.

Or like, yeah, they just do something else. Well, it made me laugh because I was like, dude, because I was like, damn, it sucks. We have to deal with that. But I'm like, if we didn't have that function every parking lot, people blasting like the guitar solo of freeberg being like, yeah, I just queued it up to this point. I don't know.

It was just here. I swear I swear I didn't just like happen to get in here and fast forward to this part. It would just be every car people. And we arm out the window. Just like, I have to fight to not do that. Like every time I do it. I do it, dude.

I got Jimmy Buffett's greatest hits in my van. You have a cranking bird cranking bird on that solo. All I want to do is get in a car and crank bird and act like it. I just so happen to be on like the drop of the guitar solo. Yeah. But what I'm saying is I like so. I'm driving a little fast and I don't have like an ox. So I just I found the Jimmy Buffett greatest hit CD.

Yeah. And you can just let it play and you can pull up at any moment of that CD. And people are like, that dude's chilling. It's like 13 tracks and every single second of every track. If you pull up with the window down your arm out, there'll be like, that guy's a good guy right there. That's what that's what I was geeking on in my car. I'm like, because I'll do the same thing.

Right. I'm like, I'm going to put this song on me. So cool. And I denied my ego goes, dude, we're not doing that. Grow up. Dude, stop queuing up sick parts of songs and acting like it just happened that way. Like you're not where you're pulling up to. Doesn't matter, bro. Parking a lot of the grocery store.

Like everyone has their windows up these days. Yeah. But do this back in high school. Everyone drove. I feel like it was more normal. I saw a dude do this one time where he had to have queue up free. But it was like when everyone gets to start driving in high school. Yeah. This dude had free bird queued on the way out and like drove out fast.

And I was I remember just being like, you motherfucker, you motherfucker. It's a sick move. It's such a sick move. I might start exclusive. I might just keep it on a loop. Yeah, just make a free bird loop of like or the beginning. Not the beginning. I need that.

Just want to just fucking pull out by Jesus Christ. Whoa, was I driving a little fast in this parking lot? Didn't even notice. Sorry. Didn't even realize it. Thinking about lost loves. Yeah, I still do that. I turn the base in my car higher if I know I'm driving by people intentionally.

Like I want them to hear these fucking system system. No, not at all. It's the stock Chevy cobalt system. You're going to hear this thing. People don't fuck with systems. No, I don't think. I don't think. Like 10s.

I thought about I might start. Yeah, I thought about getting 10s. 12s are a bump too hard, but some nice crisp. Remember like kids with rattling trunks. They were like kind of cool. That was the move, dude. I had I had a 92 Ford Taurus with 12s in the back. That thing was fucking fucking rocking.

My check engine light never came off, but my system was hitting. Dude, it was like this car sucked. Never got an oil change with like crashed it multiple times. It sounds terrible. It's such an unpleasant car ride. I've been in the back of those cars and your chest is just vibrating. I remember this kid that drove me to high school. I'd be like, dude, why are you doing this?

This sucks. He's like, no, this is fucking sick. My ears hurt. My stomach hurt. It's bad. It's like it's bad for you. Like you put on like Wu Tang and you can't hear. It sounds better if you shut those speakers.

Dude, it was definitely the coolest thing you could do though. I was 17 years old. Oh yeah. Pull up the system. It's being like the Burger King parking lot. Just fucking cranking it, dude. It's funny in high school, dude. It's like that would be the coolest thing for like one group

and then another group would have the other coolest thing. So you'd see the whole high school parking lot just filled with like some dudes like burning jays and like listening to fish and then like dudes bumping their systems. You'd be like, what? Which like it was just everyone was doing the coolest thing for their subsect of high school group. Yeah.

Now everyone's windows up NPR, dude. It's bullshit. What is it? What are high school groups? Like if you're in high school, what are your options now? How the fuck would I know, bro? I'll tell you, you said you worked in high schools for a little up. Dude, that's what I did.

You worked in high schools for a lot of time. You're a pedo, dude. Dude, high schoolers. That's your fucking, that's that shit getting out, dude. Oh, dude. My shadow? That's the shadow. That's the per, that's the ped shadow.

That's the shadow. They're listening to pods, dude. But I'm saying like, are you projecting your pet shadow onto me? I have no pet shadow, dude. What a strong ego. No, I'm saying what are your options now? Like when I was in high school.

I mean, I was in an all black high school. So it was like when I was working there, so it was like, it's, there's, it's not like, I mean, there is like, obviously there's kind of like a diversity within that, but it was more like Joe Biden, huh? I said, it's like a Joe Biden comment. What do you mean? They're all blacks vote the same.

They do the same thing. No, I'm saying there's diversity, but for me, it was more subtle than like, if I'm in a white high school, like those are just because it's like, there's a different relationship to weed. Like white kids, I've always noticed this when I was younger, white kids and black kids typically have a different relationship to weed, whereas like, I feel like white dudes get into it more.

By and large. They make it more of their identity. I'm making broad strokes. White dudes make it more of their identity and black dudes just kind of like smoke weed and just fucking do it. Black dudes are always like, why are you pulling the bong out? It's unnecessary.

Why you got that thing? True. Yeah. They're not about that. When I pull that thing out, we pull that thing out. It's definitely like. I packed that thing too. But yeah, so it was like, I mean, it was really there.

It was more like anime dudes than like just like actual like nerds. And you had just like a lot of like cool dude. It was like a bigger contingent of like cool kids. Yeah. So it wasn't really as for me. It was like, you know, obviously there's like people play sports people at all.

But it wasn't as like when I was in high school, I guess too, if I went there and was like. Yeah, you know the layers. But when I saw it was more just like anime dudes, cool dudes, and then. Any hot kids, hard nerds. So what? Any hot kids?

Say what? Bro, I was in a trusted position, dude. I was in a trusted position. That is so fucked, dude. I got all my background checks. You're back. Are you clear? Clear as a bell.

Me too. I did feel sick. And another one time I had a I had to get my FBI clearance and I have a I got a smudge on my record. Nothing, nothing, none of those bad charges. Just trespassing at Grotto's Pizza moment in Delaware. Oh, damn. So when they came back, the employer was like,

they didn't say what it was. Like you didn't have a check, but you're clear for all like the bad shit. And I was like, yeah. But you never got all those checks to work. Did you have to get checked to work in the school? Yeah, hell yeah. I was checking.

Dude, when I worked, I worked as a TA for a year or like half a year. And then a summertime came and then they fired everybody because I was planning on going back the next year. But they got rid of everyone. That it was like a third party that put us there. But two of the people that I worked with fucked kids. Yeah.

Like fucked kids. It came up. Like they got caught fucking kids or like messing around. I don't know if they fucked kids, but they were messing around with kids. I think with kids, it's like as soon as you kiss a kid, you're good. They did enough, dude. That is a law.

You were a TA. What grades were these? High school. So I was with like seniors. I don't know exactly what happened. How old are you? I was 23 at the time. And then other kids your age were banging them.

It was like older ones. I think it was older ones. It was one male with a female student and one female with a male student. Together? No. And you didn't call me? No.

That's sick. Yeah, it's fucked up. Bad stuff. That is pretty crazy, man. I would be there because I was more there as like a counselor. So I was like sitting there like dealing with like kids, like emotional stuff. And I'm like, dude, there are guys that like work that into basically an

interact, like a sexual interaction. It's like, God, what a fucking, what a demon, dude. What a demon. Yeah. Just like those, especially like the priests that would find like wayward youth and then fuck them. So that was what they did for years. You can't just jerk off, dude.

Yeah. No. You're just not into that. Just to see like a teenager like going through it, especially when you're like, you deal with them sometimes and be like, I don't know how to break this to you, bro. Like this is not going to get better for a long time because you're a kid and you're like in the care of people who are just completely fucking up.

Yeah. You're like, and then to be like, to be like, I'm going to fuck this part. It's like, dude, that's like some kid comes. He's like, my dad's always drinking. You're like, I'm like, get my dick. That's crazy, dude. It's like the same thing. You know, like when it like, you have to spit that G too.

So you'd be like, yeah, I'm not much of a drinker myself. But you know, like when you're, you know, you know, when you're like younger and you're like, some girl comes to you like in your work when they're like, my boyfriend's such a dick. Like it was our anniversary and you're like, you're like a bell goes off. You're like, I'm like, fucking bang this. Dude, if I was your boyfriend, I would never do that. Yeah.

Imagine being a priest. And it's like, my dad got drunk last night and like didn't show up for my birthday and you're like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm late. It's so fucking sick. It's so sinister, dude. What are you going to do as a new Catholic or as a returning Catholic? I would get in there and clean that stuff out. Dude, I swear to God, I think about this constantly.

I want to, I want to sit and talk to a priest for like four hours, dude. I'm like, what the fuck are you guys doing? You guys, we're on the precipice of a gigantic spiritual reawakening. Yeah. Are you going to take the body of Christ on your tongue or in your hand? Are you letting him place it on your tongue? When's the last time you're received? I have a gluten allergy, so I don't receive.

Ah, it's beat. Except the wine. Except the wine, yeah. Except the wine. I've received it a long time. I haven't ever seen it. I sit out. I don't receive it.

It's also, that's a sick thing to do, too, though. Well, sit out. To sit out and be like, ah, I see it. You're not allowed to get in the body if you've sinned. Yeah, you know those guys are sinners, dude. Who? The people that are not going up to receive. Like walking past them.

You always look at them with shame. Yeah, yeah, true. Usually do. Yeah, that was always a big thing. I grew up Catholic, dude. Did you? I get the, I get the stuff. It's the best.

You can stop going to church. Like when I moved out of my parents' house. Probably like a year before that. Yeah, mine was like, since I got my license. Yeah, probably like 16, 17. Yeah, I would like drive either bacon, egg, and cheese on a bagel and to sit and stare at a wall for 45 minutes and be like, all right, nice.

I didn't go to church. Yeah, I didn't go to church. Just drove home. Dude, I went to confession recently. Not recently. Probably like three, four years ago, though. Just for kicks? My mom was like, you want to go to confession?

I was like, sure. Yeah, I'll just drop on. Face-to-face to the screen. Screen. Coward. Yeah. It was my only option. I know, I know.

Oh, like, it would have been crazy if I was here. They stopped face-to-face. It probably did. It would have been crazy if I was like, no, I got to tell you some shit. I'd give me in your room. I used to face-to-face it. What'd you drop on?

Nothing crazy. No? Yeah. Padre Pio would have sent you. He would have cursed you out. Well, dude, I had like 10 years of sins to let this guy know about. Yeah, well, you were just like, yeah, I don't know, like.

I was like, I lie to people sometimes. Yeah. And like, I stole some shit once. But like, we didn't go into it. Yeah. In high school, I would like drop it on the priest. Did you really? Yeah.

Fuck, yeah. I'd be like, dude, we stole five fucking weed plants from Wayne's backyard. He's like, you shouldn't be telling me this. It's like, say five Hail Marys, stop doing this. Right on. Get out of here. Like, Pastor, we were out there with fucking hedge clippers.

Dog, you should have seen these things. We were digging them up out of the fucking two hands on the root. He's like, what? Oh, it's so far. I'm sorry, Father. Stealing weed plants is a fucked up crime. Yeah.

Not, I mean, I'm not attacking you. I've done things in my past, but that is a disheartening crime. It's the biggest adrenaline rush you can get. When did you wait to steal them? I was always at night. I'm saying, like, what time of the year? Like, right before they came out of the ground. Yeah, so you waited, like, OK.

There was always, like, outdoor plants. It was never, like, fucking some crazy shit. But yeah, there were so many people that had, like, fields of weed. Where did you grow up? Upstate New York. Oh, that's awesome. Dude, I was telling Sidney this story that if you bought Google Maps, because Google Maps, you can, like, see a fucking,

they update it, like, every couple months, but you can see some shit. But if you pay for Google Maps, you get, like, a live update of the earth. And then you can see where people are growing weed plants. And you really think those? Yeah, dude. You just bring a fucking some hedge clippers and a tarp and pile them up.

So you can see what, like, people are getting into? I don't think it's not like they update it much more. It's not, I don't think it's a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. But we, like, yeah, we would just fucking zoom in on shit and scan the whole neighborhood, dude. Jesus Christ, you know, it's pretty sick.

Demon time, dude. What was the biggest haul you got in terms of? It was a ping-pong table's worth of weed. What? It was, like, the whole ping-pong table was full, and it was, like, stacked multiple-fee high. Damn, that's fucking awesome. Yeah, it was a good summer, dude.

That's pretty good. Yeah, or I guess good fall. Fuck, dude, that's awesome. It's the move, dude. But that's, that's been my... It can fund your high school missions for a long time. You don't need much. Yeah, exactly.

A couple hundred bucks, dude. You're a fucking... You're a Fort Taurus and a system, dude. True. Life changes. Fuck, dude. Gardini, where were we at time-wise? I gotta do these goddamn advertisements.

Yeah, 41. Perfect. I gotta do these goddamn advertisements. Let me see you right here. I'm so sorry for the wall. If you guys could come up with something awesome to say, that'd be great. But, guys, right now, I'll tell you this, guys.

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Let's keep going. We did it. You'll eventually win. Hell yeah. You will eventually win. Gambler's ruined. Just keep doubling down. You'll figure it out.

You'll figure it out. But yeah, man, I still, I've been trippin' on that. Do you have to do a gambling addiction thing for that? Who? I don't have to do, like, if you have a gambling problem, please call 1-800-GAMELO. Not my problem. Oh, all right.

Not my gambling problem. No, I think they have extensive fucking show notes. Dude, gambling addiction is crazy. It's the only addiction I can't understand. Only one? No, I'm saying every other one, I can understand, like, what you're chasing. I know what you're chasing.

You know what I mean? What about cigarettes? What? What about cigarettes? Sean's desperately addicted to cigarettes. I understand the addiction to cigarettes. How? Thank you, Tom.

Well, just because, like, I have an addiction to, like, if I drive, I need a bev or a smoothie. I can't just drive a car in an oral fixation. I do. Right? I also need, like, something to, like, fuck with if I'm sitting somewhere. Yeah.

So it could be, like, this bowl or, like, even this thing. I picked this thing up and fucked with it a little. Yeah. So cigarettes kind of give you that moment. That's why I smoke blunts so much. Because, like, I like rolling them more than I like smoking. I'm with you on that. Yeah.

I just told you I just rolled, like, 100 joints last week. Yeah. And I don't even really want to smoke them. But I love rolling joints. Yeah. It's a good time. But I love having a ton of joints. It's true.

Having a ton of pre-rolls at your disposal is so fucking sick. But I don't ever smoke them. Like... Yeah, I just... That's true. But although going to a wedding, though, it's nice to have, like, haven't had, like, a humongous... A couple of joints on you at a wedding.

Yeah, it's always nice to roll up a flask. I mean, I'm purely in the future right now, dude. That's nuts. What's that? 5MEODMT? Obviously. Obviously. No, but I'm saying Gambley's the only...

Like, I... Like, when I see dudes, like, geeked on fucking heroin, I'm like, that probably feels good. I understand why you're addicted, and you'll get sick if you don't do it. But when I see... Winning money feels good. Yeah, but when I see dudes that, like,

start to, like, get on, like, thin ice financially... Yeah. At the first time. Like, let's say it's like, oh, I lost my paycheck. I'd be like, I'm not going to the casino anymore. Yeah, but they think they're getting it back. That's what I'm saying.

I don't understand, like, the... Like, every other addiction is, like, a constant... You're trading it for an immediate gratification. Yeah, but they're... For the gambler, from what I've heard, they're chasing that flow state. You get into a point where you're so maxed out on adrenaline, it's like, win or lose.

This is what I've heard. Win or lose is just like, you get to a point where you're just in a pure flow, like a completely unthinking state, just sliding the chips across the table. Yeah, I guess it's just your brain on. And it's just like, lose, win, lose, win, lose, win, and you just kind of get into it where you're just like,

this is... This feeling of, like, a generalized flow. And that feeling of, like, it's coming, it's coming, like... Yeah, exactly. You lose yourself. And dude, like, when you win, it's like, if you're, like, betting on sports, like, it's just one of those things where I think part of it, too,

is being like, because when I get... I, like, never got hard in gambling. When I... The first times I went to a casino, I won. Every single time. And I started, like, instantly being like, dude, I might just have, like, luck's a real thing. Like, luck's a thing people will start to, like, believe.

Yeah, all right. And they'll be like, I might have luck. And they'll start getting into that. And, like, they bet on the game, like, yo, I might just know what happens in the future. There's part of you that feels like... If you feel godlike when you, like, win in gambling, you're just like...

Especially if you're doing, like, over-unders and stuff, and you're like... Yeah, I guess, all right. Maybe put, like, a bunch of money on red and it lands red. There's, like, a... The universe... It's like the universe gives you a sign. Like, I'm just fucked up.

But I would do it and just be like... Fuck, dude, fuck. How far can I take this? I'm gonna get pussy tonight. Today's my day. I'm like, dude, I'm good at this. All right, now I understand all addiction. You get a big payoff.

Yeah, gambling's like a serious body load. Yeah, I get it, yeah. I was up, like, 1,300 bucks in craps one time. And it was just like... And you start losing it. You're like, it's pure shmeagol, dude. You're just like... Yeah, no.

It's crazy. I guess I've only gambled, like, twice. But that... Yeah, true. But I don't have any... I'm so quick to walk off the table. Yeah, that's right. Like, I lost, like, 100 bucks.

I'm like, I'm out of here. Yeah, I was up 1,300 and lost, like, I think, like, five or six of it really quick. And I was like, that's it. I'm out of here. Yeah, okay. I'm pocketing the 600 and rolling. So, when I hit triple digits, I'm out of there.

I'll usually bet, like, 20 bucks. And if it goes... Like, it's done. You get like 170 bucks. Yeah, yeah, I'm out of there for sure. Peace out, yeah. I think, yeah, I'll usually go to a casino with, like, $40, $50. And then just drink for free.

Drinking for free is the move. I guess what I don't understand is, like, dudes that, like, lose their house and shit. That's crazy, yeah. Yeah, like, I understand that on, like, drugs, because you're out of your mind. Yeah, I get it. But you've lost so much, you're, like, the big ones just...

Yeah, the big ones coming. The adrenaline rush. All right. Yeah. It's got to be such a crazy rush to just, like, know you have no money at all and just put your house on the line. Yeah, you'll feel so good. If, like, just...

I'm going to win this back. The kids' college fund, if you saved up a college, that's the one I always hear about, like, gambling away the kids' college fund. And just being like, you couldn't be any more charged up than that. Just watching those ponies are on, dude. Yeah, you just lose it.

Your daughter can't go to Penn State and get blacked out and have sex with a bunch of dudes now. It might just be a defense mechanism. Yeah, actually. She has a DCC. Teacher of trade, fuck it. Yeah. True.

Teacher how to weld. Yeah. We need more lady welders. That's, if I, I would come up and be like, I've decided you're going to weld. You could, that's the good way to handle it. Yeah, I would just go hit the casino. And your wife's like, what happened?

And just be like, never mind. I've decided we're taking a more traditional approach. Yeah, I think we're going to move back to the land. I've sold our house. I gave it to the church. Yeah. All of the money's been donated. So I would just join, like, the Latter-day Saints.

I'd be like, I've had a dream. I'm getting another wife. You're either coming with me or you stay here. So where's the money? You'd be like, don't worry about that. Yeah, I gave it to the church. You shut your mouth. Fuck, dude.

Just smack her. You'd have to stay in character for the thing to pay off. Yeah, you'd have to like dive in. You'd have to be like, we're Mormon now. Yeah, like, fuck that. Fuck money, dude. That's just the way to go. That's what I would do if I came home.

Tony, what if the truth's the worst thing every time? They're not built for the truth. They're not built for the truth. You just constantly compound the lie. You have to. Just get it more and more complicated. Yeah, that's the, Tony, that's the shit I've been tripping out on the most of like how there is a huge part of you

that's just constantly filtering so much stuff. And they're like, like not letting it out. Just there's so much stuff you can't let out of the bag. Just like even the smallest, the smallest little bullshit. I'm telling you, there's stuff like, like, you ever be in an argument and like you're kind of losing and you just kind of flip a thing real quick or like, yeah, that's kind of what I meant.

Every time I argue, dude, I black out in arguments every time. There's parts you do. You don't even notice it going on. Well, I'm not, I'm not picking up what you're putting down. So you're saying that there's a whole world of thoughts within your head. Thoughts and potential actions and things you could entertain and proceed with.

But there's a lot of stuff you strike down in your head day by day of like, that's not who I am. I don't do that kind of shit. I don't know if I do that at all. I mean, probably some ways like I don't, we're all filtered. But a lot of times filter, but like usually I'm not like, it's not like, it's not like burning like huge parts of yourself. No, no, no.

I'm saying like I usually talking a little shit. Like I don't like like when I would like the Backstreet Boys to come out. Some of their songs were jamming. I'd be like, I don't like that. I liked it. Yeah. But I'd be like, I don't like that.

No, I've been getting into just getting into all that. I used to say like, as you get older, you do when you're younger. Like I used to have a CD booklet when I was in high school. Yeah. I had like all my CDs in it. And then I had like two Cure CDs in my glove compartment. They broke your rules. And I would be like, no, I'm not listening.

I don't want my boys know I'm in here listening to Cure. Yeah. Dude, it takes like one time of the lunch table laughing at you. I mean, like, yo, you fuck with Kelly Clarkson. You were fucking gay, dude. Yeah. I'm like, no, no, I don't do it. I think it's because I turn 40.

I think once you turn 40, it all goes away. Of course. That doesn't all go away. That's like, you're just kind of like, this is fucking cool, right? A lot of it. You're so far from cool at that point. You're just swimming in the ocean.

A lot of it melts off. I was laughing like, because when I'm like, especially when you're younger, I was. Oh, when you're younger, it's all day every day. That's what I'm talking about. OK, OK. So you have like, I thought you were telling me like, you're still like turning your t-shirt inside out

because you don't want anyone to know that you like. No, I don't know. It's not like that. But there's like. Like you're at the gym like, fuck, I'm wearing these fucking corny sneakers and like my boys. No, there's, I'm just saying there's entire, there can be like entire life paths and all this.

You have to, you have to do it. I'm not saying it's a bad thing. You have to self limit. Oh, you have to like zero in. Yeah. When I was younger, I remember being like, I'm a serious businessman and I love business. I just made up this story about myself and my whole body.

I remember this. My whole body. I was like, dude, Matt's tripping. Yeah. I was like. I got a white Hyundai. I guess I was a real tour. I was like, dude's like 19.

He's going to buy a house of a 19 year old. At least a fucking hot. I became a real there. I was like, I'm a legitimate businessman and I love business and I'm going to make $100,000 a year and my life is going to be perfect. You got pyramid schemed. I had pyramid.

No, I actually luckily somehow avoided pyramid scheme. I got pyramid scheme. I got introduced. I got introduced to like two different ones and two different occasions. And I like went with my friend or whoever introduced me and was able to be like, no, this is fucked. Like this just doesn't check out.

I was I was selling Verizon files door to door. Dude, I did that every every night. I would go home and watch like Ray Lewis, halftime speeches. And I was like, I'm going to fire people up tomorrow. I'm going to get people on my team. We're going to sell these fucking supreme packages. Dude, were you doing like the door to door shit? Yeah.

And then like Philadelphia elite group was the name, dude. I think I worked for the same thing. I went I went on an interview and I was like 20 and I was still in college and like they sat me down there like, dude, you're still in college. We kind of prefer you to have a degree, but you got something, man. So I saw something in you.

I went back to my girlfriend at the time and was like, you know, I'm probably dropping out of Drexel and like, we should just get a house somewhere. I was like, probably stopped taking your birth control. I'm about to make like 200 grand. They literally told me on the interview, you can make between 50 and 125 grand your first year. I was like, holy shit, I'm getting the 125.

I went for my first day. That's my plan. Zero wasn't a thing. I'm definitely not going to make no money. I went into the first day and I was like, wait, we're just knocking on people's doors and scamming them out of there. Like it was you were selling Verizon, but it turned into something else after three months and like their bill

went through the roof. Yeah. Well, there's also these things. I remember they're called like a switch and it's like a thing where you just switch their plan. You're like, I'm going to give you Verizon, but it's going to say it's same plan, but you're going to say 50 bucks a month. It's just and then it was and then it like switches.

Yeah. Switches. So I went on my first day and I just like shadowed this guy. Yeah. Then my second day, we went up to like 34th and Haverford and we like split up and I went into this like weird TV repair store and the guy was like, what are you here for? And I was like, yeah, I'm here to talk about your Verizon bill

and he like came up to me and like didn't grab me, but like corner me and was like, dude, come in here again. I'll fucking break your nose. Like this is a scam. I was like, dude, I don't, I just, I was like, dude, they told me I make a hundred dollars. I was like, you're the golden child. So I was like, dude, I'm so sorry.

Like they told me I make a hundred dollars. I have no idea what I'm doing. It's just like, dude, how old are you? I was like 19. He's like, fucking go home. Don't work for these jerks off. So I literally just walked home. So I was right near my house and left the other dude.

Like I never went again. Thank God for that guy. He just, it was like my second call. I like rolled in. I think I went into the first one and like bought a soda and came back out and like, what'd they say? And I was like, they said the manager will be back after lunch. And he's like, all right, I'm going to go in here.

You're going there. And like, that's where the dude jacked me up. And I was just like, dude, I hear you. I swear I'm going to quit right now. And I just walked the fuck home. And then I had to go back to my girlfriend. Like I needed one of those. Keep popping those things.

Keep popping those things. But I remember I called dad too and was like, dude, like this is, I remember that you're getting fucking con. You don't know everything. And then like, I had to go home on Sunday. Like, yeah, I got a different job at Chili's. Yeah, I'm still making 60 bucks a day. You know, I thought I was going to have like a quarter

mil in the bank. Yeah, it turns out I'm just going to make 60 bucks a day for a long time. We've got to renew that birth. I'm going to put a buck for 35 bucks. Yeah, I was like, yeah, we're probably going to get married now. Like, yeah, that's what happened to me. I fully was like, I'm a real tour.

I'm going to start making money, dude. If I just get 3% of a house purchase, that's like 12,000 bucks. I like went to Brazil being like, I'm going to make 12,000 bucks. I'm going to have some fun. I didn't have any money. But yeah, my entire body rejected that. It was a certain point, just the narrative of being a business. Like, I just, I wasn't genuinely interested in it.

It was a part of myself that was trying to tweak the narrative. Yeah, that's the thing I was getting kicked out of. It's a part of yourself that can try to tweak the narrative of who you tell yourself you are. And then when you do that for too long, your body just, there's a whole other side of your body that's just like, no. Yeah, I did that one. Like in the beginning of your relationship one time, I was like,

I mean, that's every beginning. I'm done tripping. I'm done smoking weed. I'm done saying bad words. I'm going to be a good boy. And I'm going to date this because like we got on like one date and I was like, this is not going to work out. I remember that.

But I was like, no, you know what? This is my time to fucking grow up. So like no more smoking dope, no more tripping, no more anything. I'm going to be a good boy and we're going to make this work. I'll be a sexual pervert. After like nine months, it was just like, wow. Like I just doubled back.

And then when we broke up, I went off the fucking rails. You went against the organism. It's true. I heard you saying that. That's the whole thing when you try to, when you try to build too much of a one-sided perspective. Yeah. You're outside of your conscious awareness.

You're building the absolute opposite of that. And that is just all the times you go, no, I'm not going to do that. Right. And it just goes in a little bucket. No, I'm not going to. And he goes in a little bucket, little bucket. And then it adds up.

And then if, then that starts to steer your decision making from the shadows where you're like, I could probably go into a wishy-washy. You're like, I'll just get a massage. You'll literally. You start making suds. You'll still be like, I'm the good dude. And you'll be acting from an almost unconsciously

from a network of just rejected thoughts and self-concept. You start making suds. What do you mean? Seemingly unimportant decisions. It's like, I'm just going to go this way. Seemingly unimportant. I learned that from Pervert Park. That's from Pervert Park.

Pervert Park. The guy was like, you know, like. I want to go to that AA. Dude, go to the fucking pet AA. Did you watch Pervert Park? Yeah. What's that? You watched Pervert Park?

I've heard of it. What's it on? It's on Netflix. It's, it's the toughest watch. It's one of like three things that I've had to shut off. Dude, I had an aunt that moved to a trailer park in Florida. And I was like, oh, let me check this. But it wasn't that one.

It wasn't Pervert Park? I was there for a second though, dude. So this was like a trailer park that was. Dude, they're like bottles at them and shit. Yeah. So dude, it was a trailer park that was far away enough where there were no school zones. So pedophiles could rent there.

Yeah. So it ended up just getting packed with pedophiles. And now it's like all pedophiles, right? It's just like a therapeutic community though. They have like dudes in there trying to help. Yeah. Dudes trying to be like. They're all paroled up.

That's like a, that's a, I thought it was. Like a halfway situation? Yeah. That's kind of like a half. That wasn't just like a group of fucking. It wasn't like. Well, no, no, I think it was like they made a spot for them. So it's like they.

Try to get them. Yes, they did. They did. They, yeah. But they like bury them in fucking warehouses and stuff. You can't work anywhere if you have like a sex crime on a child charge. Yeah. But the one dude kept talking about suds.

So he's like, you know, I was like trying to watch some porn. Like they, so I'm watching like, this is fascinating. Then they started interviewing the individual ones about their crime. And I was like, I tapped out. Now that what fucked me up was that like all of them, for the most part, all of them had stories of being horribly molested themselves. Yeah. So I'm like, dude, these are throwing bottles at them.

I'm like, I'm watching like, fuck, I'm laughing like, then the like, the lady was like, I was having sex with my dad for 20 years. And I was like, Jesus fucking Christ. Yeah, you're like, oh fuck. But like dude, she like left her dad and then like try to get like set apart, like a have like a normal life. And like, I don't know if she was dating someone or what, but she ended up like, like, like you were saying, like had to come back,

but rather than have to come back and like, yeah, it turns out, you know, I didn't have it as figured out in the world as I thought I did. She started fucking her dad again. So she had to come home and like as an adult and just take up a sexual relationship with her father. Damn. Dad was fucking putting that thing down. What?

Literally, literally. I tapped out. Blowing her back out. What? It's so fucked, dude. And you're watching her just being like, that was literally all I knew. That was normal to me. I just turned it off.

The other dude went on a date, right? The guy was like, like some guy, like he was like, uh, just, you know, no luck with the lady's type. Yeah. Finally gets a date. They ignored him. The date goes south. He fucking spazes after he drops his date off.

First kid he sees, he jumps out of his car. He drove to Mexico. To Mexico. So he was in, I guess he was in Texas for a date. And he just, yeah, fully didn't work out. He was like, fuck this chick. And then it was like, he had a critical Elliott Rogers moment where he's like, am I going to go shoot up a sorority?

And he's like, no, I'm going to go to Mexico. And he had to try to abduct someone's daughter down there. And they beat the shit out of him. This is on the documentary. He's talking. He's like, dude, I fucked up. You know, he's acting like all these other people have these like stories. Like, ah, man, that's fucked.

What did I do with his son? Fuck that guy. Said he was like, yeah, you know, like I was watching porno tapes and my niece and her friends, they were all in the next room, having a sleepover. Yeah. You know, they're suds. Like I didn't think of it at the time, but I knew what I was setting up.

I knew they were walking in. So wait, the kid in Mexico is a sud. Suds. No, the suds. That was a very important decision. He decided to have a child and try to bring him into the country. Dude making suds was like watching porn with his door open, like while his niece and nephew were in the other room.

Yeah. And he knew that they had to like come through to get a baby. Also a pretty important, that's not a sud at all. But he acted like it was like, I see he was he was bit by bit. Yeah. He was just like, I could be like, I'm sorry to check on you. Suds are like fucking crocs on or not. You know what I mean?

Yeah, that's a real sud. Like jerking off in front of your niece is not it's it. It's not a sud. That's why it's a way to try to play. Eyes, eye alert. Decision something. Or like taking the route that cuts through the playground. True.

It's like, you know, it's two minutes slower, but still it's a nice walk. I mean, where where are you walking where you have to cut through playgrounds? Pants, man. Just roll. Yeah. That's so ped life, dude. I don't know. Ped life is fucked, man.

But yeah, a lot of them got molested. So you're kind of like, but you may have to put them down, dude. I mean, I know it's one of those dogs. They got the shit kicked out of him. It's literally you have rabies. Yeah. He's just like, you got rabies, bro. Yeah.

Can't let you out. I gotta put you down, man. Sorry. Tale of Old Yeller. Yeah. It's I mean, dude, it's literally that it's like it's such a heinous thing. It's like, like I don't for a second think I could just like shoot people. But like I always like, could I shoot a pedophile if I called a dude?

Like this is the other thing I think about all the time. If you get word that a dude's been pedo in your kids. Oh, you just call the cops. I would kill. Or do you roll up or do I call the cops myself? Like I'm about to kill this guy. You better fuck. No, I'd call with the body.

You call with the body. I'd be like, yo, I have a body. Yeah. But then you got to do jail the rest of your life. No, you wouldn't. No, you would. You would. With a clean record.

If you were like, yo, I snapped. Because that's what came to Alaska. True to like three years actually would be sick. Cain didn't even kill the guy. He shot at him and he's doing an attempted murder. Who? Cain Velazquez, former UFC heavyweight champ. Why'd he shoot at a guy?

The guy was touching his daughter in preschool and he found out about it. And then he ran up on the guy and shot at him. But he hit the guy's father who was in the car with him. Ah, see now you'd have to be meditated. Like you'd have to like roll up, know where he is, watch him for a couple of days. That's crime of passion. Yeah, that's that's his dad die.

No, it's fine. But yeah, also don't be rolling around with your kid when he fucks kids. Imagine like your dad gets shot. You're like, yo, dad, can you give me a quick lift? And then your dad gets shot. He's like, what the fuck? And he's like, because you're a fucking pedophile. He had no idea.

Or it's like when you can't hang out with drug dealers, like, yo, they might have enemies. Yeah. It's like you're hanging with pedos. It's like, yo, the block is so hot right now. Imagine your dad gets shot and you like look at the guy and you're like, I fucked his daughter. Oh, fuck.

Yeah, it's fucked, dude. It's deep shame. But anyway, let's go to the page. Now they're on this high note. Let's hit the page.