Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast - Ep 470 - The Montauk Monster (feat. Tim Dillon)

Episode Date: November 29, 2023

Support the D.A.W.G.Z. @ patreon.com/MSsecretpod Support Tim @ patreon.com/thetimdillonshow Go See Matt Live @ mattmccusker.com/dates Go See Shane Live @ shanemgillis.com Go See Tim Live timdilloncomedy.com Get Merch @ mssecretpodcast.com/merch YO. We're here with the weekly installment of Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast. The D.A.W.G.Z. are live from SGs casa w/ the bro Timothy Dillon.  Naturally, its a piping hot cast. Please enjoy. God bless you all. Support the show & get 20% off & free shipping at https://www.manscaped.com with the code DRENCHED Support the show by going to https://www.hamiltondevices.com & using code DRENCHED15 for 15% off Visit thefreezepipe.com and use code DRENCHED for 10% off your order Get 25% OFF @ trueclassic with Promo Code DRENCHED at https://trueclassictees.com/DRENCHED #trueclassicpod Go to https://auraframes.com/mssp and get up to $60 off today. 

Fuck restart it. Hey, we're live. Oh my gosh. You were Tim Dylan. What's up guys? What's up, dude? Oh, thanks. Thank you for having all things man. I gotta get a cleaning lady. They're around. Yeah, you can get one easy. You could get several. I don't think I'd have to get a car I think I could walk in a block. You could get one very, like on a bus stop, anybody will do it. Yeah. Anyone will come back to the house. Yeah.

That in an exterminator. Oh yeah. You can get an exterminator here. I need one these flies. Five minutes. Diltures come over the house. They'll invent problems that are on there. They'll tell you about other things you don't have

that you might have. The male lady here yesterday worked as an exterminator for Mishka. There was a possum dead in the front. No way. And she was like, I got rid of that possum. It's been here for four straight days. I was thinking. I was hoping that's what's staying. Something in this house occasionally stinks like shit. Where was it that I was hoping it was the dead animal? Yes, probably. Where was it located? It was out front left. That's where you were catching this male. Front left though. Yeah. I've been catching it. I have been catching on this side of the house, which is nice.

That's a dead pause. Hopefully you have it. It must have been dying. Come through the walls. It's been dying for like a month in there. And then went out front to die. Finally, I don't know. The right thing. Yeah. It did the honorable thing. Yeah. Where did she put this thing? She, I don't know. She's like, a tax. She was like, I found it. She's like, just so you know, I got rid of that dead awesome. And I was like, I thought he talked about the woo hand lab they're selling the animals out of the back door. Just again, bringing them back to life. Yeah, we have it where I live. There's a taxidermy place, like right on the corner where people will

bring in like their dog. And take have a taxidermy Or like I think most of it's hunters But every now and then like somebody will come in with a cat like a house and they'll do it They go yeah, we'll do it. I'm gonna bring a dog in and be like the big O's repeat like I hunted it Took it out of someone's backyard I'm not kidnapped this. I took it out of someone's backyard. That's one of my things. Yeah, you could bow hunt fucking golden retrieves and people's back. All day, dude. That'd be pretty sick. All fucking dead. Rogan told me when we first moved here, he goes my wife saw a zebra. And I go, oh, I don't really? And he goes, yes, he goes, there are zebras in the hill country occasionally.

What? There's parakeets, there's wild parakeets. I'm just saying that's what I was told. And maybe. There could be, there could be. There could be, but he said that because my wife saw a zebra and I went. And I went.

Well, in the hill country, and I live out there. So I go, oh, I've never seen him. I love to see if I woke up and I saw Zebra, I'd feel good. So, you know, I don't know how it was. I did do that with Naim Naim Ali. He was like, I saw, in Philadelphia, he was like, I was driving and I saw a dead a wolf on the side of the road. And I was like, Naim, bro, please don't make me argue with you. I argued with him. It was, we were on a road trip.

I argued with him for two hours. Yeah, I was like, there's no wolf. Yeah. There's no wolves in Philadelphia. There's no wolves anywhere near that. Yeah. Yeah. There's a wolf sanctuary in like North Jersey,

but I don't think they made it to fill it off. I mean, if one of them got out and got on the highway and got hit and no one collected and somebody hit a wolf and a wolf was dead on the side of the highway. It was probably a husky. Yeah, I mean, for sure. He was like, no, it was huge.

There's other solid space. Like, we had something in Long Island and they called it the Montauk monster It was a weird looking thing that washed up on the shore people like it's from the Plum Island disease research facility Like it's something they were experimenting on and like multiple people just came out go no, no, that's a dog And it's just a bloated body dog and no one cared They're like it came from Plama. It's a secret government experiment.

And then the guy's like, no, no, no, when a dog dies, it's body bloats. He loses his hair and bloats. It's going to look fucked up. And that's exactly what it is. Like, that's literally what it ain't no one cared. They're like, no, it's crypto. He wants a Chupacabra.

That happens. Yeah, that's easy. I can see how that. Yeahabra. That happens. Yeah, that's easy. I can see how that. Yeah. If I saw it. Yeah. I would, if somebody didn't tell me a dog washed up,

I'd be like, no, they're like, that was a chupacabra. Yeah. It's a freak. The thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing,

the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, the thing, I saw a fucking a mountain line or like a cougar whatever and that he was one going and that there was one Wow, yeah, he said he saw the tracks Did now I remember

I've never given the tracks I remember I remember vehemently arguing that I did see Santa Claus When I was about his age when he saw the mountain lines tracks and I didn't know now like if somehow there was like a news report that they were like, Santa was in the area. Yeah, I did. Yeah, no, I'm not going to give him mountain. We all used to go hunting for that mountain line. There was rumour to be a mountain line loose like in Delaware County, Pennsylvania. Just one. Just one. He's one. He's one. Yeah, that was true. Yeah, there was. It was one. Yeah, it was. That's one. And now it's true. Yeah, there was. There was one. There was.

That's great. So then everyone's like, yeah, I saw it. Yeah, I saw it. Yeah. And then that justified him. So you have one in L.A. It was called P22. And P22 was like, there's tons in L.A.

But there's one that anyone ever, they had a retractor on them. And he had a Twitter account. And they would tweet out like, I walked 10 miles yesterday and then it would start tweeting at things like I'm probably trying to find water. I wish there wasn't climate change so that there would be what like and then it would tweet out crazy stuff and then it would tweet out like black lives matter all this stuff. They're just an animal wild.

P22 and then it started shredding. This was like the mascot of LA. This guy P22. then it started shredding. This was like the mascot of LA this guy P22 Then it started just killing dogs and cats and attacking people So then they just quietly killed it They put it down this this this cat this big cat It was like the mascot of like it was on social media like I'm in the Santa Monica Mountains They would take photos if they did upload it And then they just had to quietly like oh, yeah, he's lost his mind Oh, yeah, he's in silver like now like like bus boys at restaurants are like oh shit

Is it in the alley like growling? They're like oh, yeah, we just got a quietly kid and then they just quietly put it Yeah, I like it. It was on the right side of history in first. Yeah, I was doing the right thing First But they were gonna build like a wildlife bridge I think they have a few of them were like in their minds. They think that like oh, no Yeah, they're just gonna walk across Cuz they get hit sometimes on like the one-on-one or four and they think no, they'll use the bridge and None of them use the bridge no one's seen one of them on the bridge. It's just like a

little bridge no one's ever. Is it like a rope like a zoo enclosure bridge or something? Yeah it's a weird it's a weird thing that goes over the highway that like I guess like if you're a mountain line you would just go over that but no one you'd have to hire people to go yeah all day long and no one sees these mountain like no one ever sees very rare on a ring cam You'll miss him on like a ring cam. Yeah occasionally. Damn. That's kind of cool. It's cool. Don't fuck you up I won't they won't they attack you fuck you up? Oh my god. Yeah, they're hungry. Fuck joggers up Oh, fuck you up if they're hungry for sure and even maybe if they're not Yeah, that's terrifying, which is I was scared down here when I moved

I didn't know like what kind of animals were down here. So I was like, you just kind of worry about like little things, like a brown recluse spider over when you're dead. Yeah. You know, that things like that. So baby radars. So baby radars. Yeah.

Really? Yeah. Little guy. That's nice. Had the brown spots on my trail was walking. Nice. Yeah, things like that here, but you don't, I don't think you get real big, you don't get big

Yeah, I walked through the grass and I'm like I was in Arizona. We were afraid of the Havillina's the pigs What you would appreciate this I was drunk with Doug stand-hob walking around Like we gotta go he's afraid of the He's dressed like a fucking clown from the 70s. Yeah, there's a happy guy there. He's trying to go. He's afraid of the obvious. He's dressed like a fucking clown from the 70s. There's a big guy there. He's stronger. He's like, oh, they're blind. Dude, they're boring.

Yeah, they were. They were. They're like, actually, yeah. They desert pigs. The desert pigs, they get to the trash at night in his neighborhood. And he wanders the neighborhood at night. That is his natural predator. That's his natural predator.

It's mindful of it. Please let's stay and hope get killed by a pack of fucking Fixed by haveline We're Turned to be honest. He would raise he would be like please. Yeah, he'd be happy with smoking No, he did Quit say last time I saw him at mother shit because I quit smoking cigarettes That sucks

He did it Snoop Dogg quit him in the Meek Mill went to Dubai to quit smoking weed. Now what do you think? What do you think? What do you think? I don't think I got to divide. No, well, no, I mean, I get that. But why do you think he quit? Yeah, what do you think it was? I think it's like a collapse long dude. It's probably a real. It's probably a doctor sets it. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, really? Meek Mill is

quitting for real. Dude, I do know guys that like smoke like 12 blunts a day and you just can't do that forever. You know that's bad. Yeah, like you're smoking like construction paper all day every day. Like your lungs are going to be... I've had a friend at the smoke cigarettes and we're going, I don't smoke cigarettes, but we literally have just a blunts ear in a mouth, like just constantly. And I'm like, dude. You're smoking so got like Paper when they're sprayed with like strawberry

To which god, they'll a dot strawberry fill. Yeah, yeah, it's so funny though Now if any like black dude is a quiz mug and we do you have to go to Dubai? Is it go there? That idea makes me laugh so hard I have to make a cheek for him. I'm not smoking blood. It's so congrats you, Slop. That idea makes me laugh so hard. I've never been, have you been to Dubai? No. That's people of it. Really?

I don't know. I don't know. It's not for me, but like I keep people like... It seems like a worse like Miami. It's people just dig it. Yeah. People, you know. They're trying to position it to be like the Miami of the best.

Yeah, like Vegas, Miami, Vegas of the desert. Yeah, I never driver. Tell me about it one time and he was like hyping it up. Like you can go to the nightclub. Yeah, like the cops. He was like a top-striker. Lamborghini's, it's like that sucks.

He was saying that you can go to nightclubs and get prostitutes. I was like, it's like a super rich, crazy world where you can kind of do a lot of stuff like there's indoor ski resorts. Okay. Like it's crazy. Everything's got to be indoors because it's like 112 degrees. So everything happens indoors.

And the cop drive Lamborghini's. Yeah. It's kind of sick. No, it's probably just great. It's just a great tough on the level. Yeah. Yeah, my wife wants to go there and I've been saying no, it's a whole great. It's just the grand total level. Yeah, yeah, my wife wants to go there and I've been saying no It's a whole time like I'm not going to do buy. Yeah I'm gonna do buy it. I know. It's it. Did he crush his black Instagram? It's done. Yeah, yeah, no, it's true. It's a world designed by rappers. Yeah, you know, it's a rap place

It's a scurge on black. It's you gotta get her to give something up when she goes. Dubai? Yeah, Bickering, true. She should post in a full her job just, true. I'm done bickering. I'm done bickering.

I've given up bickering. I'm gonna put away all the stuff. Yeah. It's time for me to put away stuff. Yeah, I should tell her, I'm gonna warn her, but bro, you gotta understand. If you go, no chirping. I'd hate this you get taken away by the authorities. Right.

There's gonna be chirping. I know. Yeah. Yeah, it is an interesting place for Black Instagram to be like, this is the Middle East. It's hilarious. I can't stop laughing about like Arabian dudes encountering just like Black dudes

Yeah, you know, it's just full-sheet turbaned out It's looking weed it is it has like a weird vaguely spiritual overtone on it, but it's just oh It's just a weird place. You just in the desert. It's like yeah, dude. This is really important for me to do this You just get hammered in a club, have sex with the prostitute. Yeah. Yeah. You just have, yeah, just an Atlantic City experience.

Yeah, you can do that now or from your house. They're trying to make Atlantic City a family-friendly place now. That's not gonna happen. I know. It's a big place. It's good to see them try with Atlantic City when it's, it is hopeless. Yeah. it's a

definition of hopeless places fucked up. It's fucked up. And there's old houses. He what it is, which is like a place for like bachelor and bachelor at parties. Oh, yeah, for weddings that have a 80% chance of unraveling within two years. Like marriages, like the worst marriages. That was my batch or my batch reply for my first marriage. You'll be the key. Yeah. I mean, that's a good deal. No, it's a horrible. We did one one, I mean, they're still married, but we did Mike Lawrence's bachelor party. It was very, it was me, Scott Chaplin, Mike Lawrence,

Microsine. Just the most autistic fucking and we just went like he doesn't drink So we just went to like the showboat and we went to like a buffet and then we just walked on the board walking it was like tragic It's far do they have billboards for whippets. Yeah, the Atlantic City border. Yes. Oh, yeah I'm not lying. They have literally huge billboards for like go you can go puff wippets out there Yeah, I was not saving. Really? Yes. Oh, yeah. I'm not lying. They have literally huge billboards for like, you can go puff wippets out there. Yeah.

I was so hot. I was just maybe the only way to really enjoy it. We just did that. Did you like hoffing? It's okay for you to be got a hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot. You're wearing it being like, this is Dubai. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, and casino. You just watch a street fight. Like I'm sitting front row. There's Trump. You're pointing at people. Yeah, they're in an effort to make it more family friendly.

They opened it into a water park, but it's like $112 per person to go. By the way, the brain eating amoeba is growing in that water. Like, it's always a tragedy. Like, you know, like, it'll be like six months from now. They'll be like rare disease, closest water problem.

What China is popping off right now with a child pneumonia. What? They're going nuts. Supposedly China has like a new plague of pneumonia and it's affecting children and their masks are on. I'm not even kidding.

It's like, it's ha- Oh, she didn't tell Matt this. That's like the new iPhone over there. There's no- No, I'm in the dreams. They do have a C6 dream. You get new virus. See, it's the new iOS.

You updated, try out pneumonia. Try out pneumonia, try out. I don't want to be conspiracy guy, but it is fucking weird that it's like another election. Oh yeah. Hey, how about one that goes for the kids? Dude, it's weird that it's happening. Yeah, we're gonna need to pull out some pretty serious stops this time. This is gonna be the dams are gonna have to pull something out. They're in deep trouble. Yeah, child pneumonia would get it done though. That's a good

one. I don't know. You know what? I pneumonia would get it down. No, that's a good one I don't know. You know what? I don't think it does I don't think it's gonna get it done this time Sure, all Trump has to walk it off show up you up see events You're gonna be telling a nine year old who's cough and like keep your mouth shut. I'm going to vote. Yeah, true Yeah, I guess there's I don't know. You think the win who? Dems nos no no yeah But they are gonna have to do something they're gonna put up like a desperate Hail Mary. Why are they writing by I don't understand why they can't get a cool

Young guy to be like hey There's no cool young guys left the only one they might have is like Gavin Newsom who's a good debater He's decent looking but California's a mess and everyone hates California Yeah, and he hates him and when he's done the cover like California's a mess and everyone hates California. And everyone hates him and when he's done the cover, like he was the mayor of San Francisco, which is what I need.

So yeah, you're a world country. And what's kinda interesting about him is how happy he looks all the time. Like if you're in his state where literally it's collapsed and you can't look that happy all the time, he always kinda looks positive and happy. You're gonna say what you want about lawyer life for she did play the role oh lord claps personally nobody did it better than that nobody embodied the fall of the city

physically more than that woman in every respect by the way I mean what was it superhero costume I'm like around the destroyer Like beetle dude. She look like fucking crazy. She look like the Orkin bug guy It was like sprays No, there's nobody Looks like she's on Howard Stern she left it all in the office though. You gotta give her that She's at Harvard. What? This is why we're fucked up

Oh, wow, I'm teaching it hard. I know she's teaching Politics government at Harvard. What? Just walking your foot as with her voice with that voice. Seeing your leadership fellow She was in the airport everywhere too. If you travel in Chicago. She had her like image kind of plastered up on me She was a Batman villain. She was a Dick Tracy villain even, and she would like yell at my favorite thing and she'd have a prize conference. And somebody would ask a really reasonable question.

They'd be like, hey, so they were like 30 murders yesterday. And then she'd be like, I'm not tolerating this. So good. It's so good. So she'd be like, I'm not tolerating this. I'm not tolerating this. We're moving on. And they'd be like, I'm not tolerating this. We're moving on and they'd be like, we're just asking a 14 year old shot for people in a mall

and she'd be like, this is confidential. I know where you work. I know the people you work for it. She had this like raspy, got a little boy and she refused to be accountable for anything that would go. People would just bring up what went on the city they go. Hey, so a flash mob robbed and beat a couple outside of rpm seafood last night and she'd be like we're not doing this today

There was there was a new guy who started to try and do this. Can't where he was like if you're not from Chicago Keep our name out of your fucking mouth Why do you have so many murders like that's our business? out of your fucking mouth. You're like, why do you guys have so many murders? Like, that's our business. That's family business. That's family business. Did you get to do that?

Yeah, I was like, let's do a chant right now. Biden hits that. Biden hits the we're not doing this today. Yeah. He just walk. He just literally stops. He walks away. You're thinking, you're wrong, but it's perfect.

Because you watch him go. And it is crazy. And all you go, like, it's elder abuse. And it's great. My favorite thing about him is that they had a family meeting over last Christmas and they reported this it was in all the papers and it was a big meeting in Nantucket They had a holiday there and the meeting was to determine if he was fit to run again And then they like after this meeting they're all like we're all on board with this

We all we all think it's a great idea. And I'm like what possibly could have gone down yeah At that Meaning where they go this guy should go run for president again Like if he was like this upcoming he was a math teacher. They would go pop hang it up Like there's no job he's fit to do. Like any family with any kind of decent, like they'd be like, buddy, hey, pop. Yeah.

You did like, don't, like if he was a lawyer, they'd be like, buddy, you don't have to work from home. Yeah. You do a case month. The family meeting was obviously not real. No, it wasn't real. But if it was real, yeah, it's funny to imagine what. I think maybe there's, I've always had a weird theory that like they don't want someone in there

who might uncover stuff. Because I think there's fuckery. And I think that they don't want especially while Trump is around, they don't want somebody getting in there that might, you know uncover Fucker. Yeah, they're like walking them off though, dude like the fucking It looks like a mafia thing where they're like they're like no, no, we got it. He's good It's like feels like what are you what are you worried about what are you doing? Yeah, you don't want anyone else in that's weird. It is something's fucked up makes no sense It's like I don't get it. I like when he does try to answer questions.

It's the best. And then his staff has to come and be like, yo. Yeah, don't do that. His whole go for it. If somebody asks him a question, he usually tries. He'll try. He does this best. And he's frustrated, which is a lot of like really old people

could get mad, like it themselves. Like, his brain's not working and they're like mad. Yeah. He gets mad that his mind won't allow him. Oh, that's sad. He's had a tough life. You could remember. Yeah, he did.

Wife died, kids died. Like the sun dies. The wife is wiped off right with a car accident. It's a little easy. Then the sun dies. The other suns on drugs start stating the dead son's daughter. I mean, no, sorry not wife. Yeah, like it's not a I Know Jill was the nanny Jill was a nanny his nanny that was in his car when the wife died I got

I got that that might that's not a good source true. That's more. So they're nanny died with them. I've been hanging out with billions of the last couple days. I got to hear a lot of fucking things. The nanny or the Jill was the nanny to his original marriage. Yeah. Oh, oh, allegedly. She's also not going to be a dog. They call her doctor. She's not really a dog. No, she's not a dog. She could kindergarten teacher. This crazy. She like a doctor. No, she's not a dog. She's a good kid to go teach this crazy She's like elementary school me cold a doctor chill by so it's kind of nuts I love Michelle Obama would be their best choice

Because she's not a politician. She doesn't have a record people like her, but she has to hide her Only issue that she's a guy She has to hide her. She must be hiding. She only has the only issue that she's a guy. That's the only issue that's the only like for real. I know that's the fun conspiracy. Yeah. But there is something preventing her from becoming a president. No, one thousand percent. She would be president in the late five. She'd be the president in the late five. Every day she'd say don't announce her. I get closer to being like something's going on there. Maybe she has a cock. Something's up. What is going on there. He has a cock. Something's up.

What is going on there? She's a perfect candidate except for the fact that she was a man when she met her husband. You know what's nice is if they run her, Trump will when he gets off in a debate. It's coming out. You have a cock. The big mic is coming out. And that's the big one. That's what they're calling her. They're calling her big mic.

I'm not calling her big mic. That's what the big one is. Big mic. I'm not saying it. It's not the best conspiracy. It's so funny. Because it's reached the actual, it's reached the dads and uncles.

It has, yeah. My dad and they'll be like, you mean, you mean, my mother, I'm gonna give you the fuck out of you. My mother said in her mental institution in the common area when they were and they would have. By the way, we went after she died and we went to like get her stuff like whatever

like beanie babies and stuff that had littered around the room. You know, they called us and they were like, you want to get her stuff? My aunt's like, we should get her stuff. I wanted to be like, just give it to the other nut shops, right? Let's give it to them. They're not going to know whose karma the frog this is. They're not even going to remember. One of the best case one of them, Michael, that's Patty's

Kermit. Oh, it's kind of remember. So we go in there to get your dead schizophrenic mother's beany day. It's the most depressing day ever. And I was so thankful one woman, one of her orderly, isly to get you making lady pull me aside and because she goes, you'll like this. It's really funny.

A couple of days for your mom died, Michelle Obama's giving you speech and like, your mother was sitting there in her wheelchair just watching and we went over to her. We're like, should we leave this auto? My mother goes, should we leave Varanhas? Michelle Obama and my mother goes, yeah, you can leave Varan, but then my mother goes, I think that's a man So it reached my Skit to Fr. Margarine somehow in her mental institution in Jamaica Queens it got to her that thing that right before she died

It's the last thing she learned on her What's the final thing she learned on her? She goes oh that woman might be a guy and then literally She just had a bowel obstruction check out. It's a kiss. She probably spread it to the car I mean she probably went in that room. I was talking to the bean babies like She gives it to another Winnie, you do see a ball Look at her on Ellen you see a ball. She finally connected to reality.

She finally did the very end. But it is, by the way, there is nothing better. If it is, and I, that's why I wanted to be true, because it's funny. There's something about it being true, and then her having the confidence to free ball on Ellen and just have a dick hang out. She's like, one of those dudes on TikTok

in the Grace Web pants, who's like, take a look at this, trying to get views. It's like crazy. Yeah, I wonder why they don't feel it's crazy. They don't, I never thought about that, because I'm like, yeah, they bring her out. Yeah, let's go advertisements. Yes, yes, yes.

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Caitlin Jenner came to my, I had a friend's giving. I'll say this, and I don't know if this reaches Caitlin. Let me know if it does. God bless. But to say that Caitlin is a masculine person would be maybe the understatement of the year. Caitlin walks in the house for a long wait, Caitlin Jenna came to you. She comes with her girlfriend, her girlfriend is a trans. We see your thanks.

Yeah, thanks. My thanksgiving friends giving friends giving I invited you to but you know what? No, didn't I ever went I get it. Damn you could have told me well, that's what wants you to come in. They were coming. I would have been great So she comes with her girlfriend a girlfriend is a trans mag influencer Okay, so this is this is my dream. This is perfect for me. This is all I want the whole party everyone else I love Andrew Santino everybody, but it's it's about this. It wasn't about anything else. For sure. She walks in, by the way,

she walks in like 15 minutes after the supposed, it starts, no one's there yet. There's like three weird people that I barely know and then Caitlyn Jenner walks in. She walks in, she's like six four, built like a brickshed house, walks in, she's, you know, a specimen, right? She walks in, she shakes my hand, I go,

you're really punctual, she goes, and I taught my kids how to be punctual too. They're all punctual. And it's like the most dad thing to say ever. And then she shakes my hand, I'm like, yeah, yeah. So like, we give her a drink. And like, you just, like then like more people start to come. Maybe there's like 20 people there now

And then she's just talking about how no one's patriotic anymore in America I don't know how like so she's standing in the middle of my Kitchen showing people pictures of her plane and going nobody's patriotic anymore You know when I won those gold medals she goes people are cheering for me But they're also cheering for America Nobody's fucking patriotic and then it's she's surrounded by LA Godless scum, you know, who have to, who have to swallow this message and like some of them are agreeing. And her trans maga influence girlfriend,

starts going like, he has kind of a low voice, but she's like, she goes, she goes, she goes, well, she goes, kind of a low voice. Well, she goes she goes she goes well she goes well well she goes well I She goes I think I think that one of the real problems with this country is it nobody Appreciates it. I'm good. It is. I'm like yeah, yeah, you know, and we're just rah rah and it's just it's the craziest I mean, I like that you did have LA people there that had to be like their famous. I have to listen to what they're saying You have to listen to what they say. Yeah, I mean those are probably powerful couple. That's by the way

It's the best couple of the shivers. It's my favorite couple in LA. Nobody does it better than those two. Yeah. Nobody. That's awesome. I love them both. And I want to get dinner with them, and I want to be part, whatever that is, like that whole trans-maga,

Oh yeah. I have my own plane movement. Dude. Can't be in that. you're doing like a gonzo journalism Graciating yourself with the freaks. Well, it's the fun. It's a fun When you hear when you hear just you see two women and then they're talking and they're going the problem with America Yeah, it's no one's patriotic It's it's really beautiful. It's like a beautiful Yeah, it is you know, it is like a bunch of things just

That's the high level just coalescing it's a black black mag black magga gets me fired up Transmagga might be fucks me. It's back. That's the top. That's the top. It's the top. Yeah, I'll pass out if I watch Oh, I was fucking loose conscious this Here's how strong mag is this why I think about trans I got the fuck G-Force and a simulator You're stuck to the couch It's so power it shows mag is so powerful that like it won't be stopped Dude you're in the mega It will eventually reach everyone.

That's just great. It's just, it's going to be, there will be non-binary mega eventually like you'll just see a fat gender like non-conforming weirdo with blue hair. And just put on that hat. I'm so thankful. Oh, it's, it gets, it's like COVID. It's like, you'll get it.

You're just gonna get it. Yeah, you don't have to worry about how you're gonna get it. You don't have to analyze it. You're gonna get it. You tell everyone it's fake. Yeah, it doesn't matter. You're gonna get it. You're gonna get it.

I think I'm so embarrassed. I did everything I could of me. I tried so hard. I've been in my part for two weeks. I've been wearing this hat for two straight fucking weeks. This hair is so hard. I've been in my apartment for two weeks. I've been wearing this hat for two straight fucking weeks. There's aerosol droplets. Look up one day and there was a hat. I just was wearing a red hat. And she's great about Caitlyn Jenner. She was like, she said, I'm against marriage.

She said, I'm a good, I just said. She's against gay marriage because I'm an old-fashioned girl. I'm against gay marriage. When she came out against gay marriage, I couldn't love a person more. I don't ask you. I couldn't love when she said, I'm an old-fashioned girl. I don't love a person more. I couldn't love when she said I'm an old fashion girl. I don't want Gays getting married. I could not love. I remember. I rented his house and I was on a beach like we're now but we rented it for like two days and I was there and I was just like I read that article and I know that she's in the area. She like lives in Malibu someone. I just like look at I'm like I know where she is. You feel her breath. I just love her so much for saying that just going I'm an old-fashioned girl and

You know, yeah, I just don't want queers getting mad She goes to a country club. She still kills it on the course. Fuck still plays great golf. That's awesome. Yeah. It's probably a 70. Yeah, probably nasty. Yeah. The cable made a presidential bid or no government in California.

Governor of California. It's got to come. There's a great thing. There's she's in like a little car. And then like she's going down some crazy parade route. And then someone just yells at her like Madam governor, and then she just raises her hand But here's a thing

I was following her gubernatorial campaign and I was gonna contribute. Yeah, I just wanted to go to whatever I'm like whatever events there are to this. I'll pay any amount of money to just go to this Let me just wait this, like up close. Like I'll just, I don't care if I die, bro. Let me get near whatever, like brain trust. Is it a room with our, like you know that documentary about Clintons first campaigns, like a famous documentary, like James Carville and Stefan Oplis,

I forget what it's called, he was called a war room. With her all like working out, like the positions, and like what he's gonna say, I'm like, let me get in that with Caitlin Jenner, please. And then she left, this is what sucks back California. She gave up to be contestant on celebrity big brother. I'm like, you don't really care about the future of California. If you're just going to

leave to be a contestant, I'm like, you don't need any more money. You're already one of the most famous people in the world. What are you doing? Yeah, that's a weird move. Well, although I'm glad it's to the list We're And seeing her at the party she was running too early. She was four years too early. She was too early next next next run There's gonna be like we said there's more of that trickle-down Maga it's hitting everybody. Yeah, no she's got some support people gonna be very confused. I Think that that is the future. Yeah, I think trans Maga is the future of America. Yeah, I mean, it's just, it is.

There's just the, you know, it's just truly getting into whatever you want to get into. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's all filled. It's really riding the rails. I'll say this, I don't even like when I'm playing an online video game and somebody puts their character in a dress. True.

If I'm playing called duty and somebody's dress, not like a soul job like this game. So now we got a whole car. Alright, whatever. But I do think I think that person's in a dress and without follower of Donald Trump. And there's something about it. I totally agree. That's where it switches a little.

There is something about it where you go, this is kind of nice. You know, you know, you know all the bullshit, the annoying things about trans people go away if they're maga. Yeah. And the annoying things about maga people almost go away if they're trans. Of course. Because maga people get a little annoying, but if they're trans, that probably tempers that.

So we might have found the perfect person. Yes. Yeah. They're like wizards on the battlefield of the culture. They are. No, they can't touch the internet. Nothing can touch. I also, I like the idea of keeping, because I know we always blame like Russian China for

all of our, everything, every all of our cultural problems are like those are Russian bots of producing PLM. Yeah. Yeah. I bet Russian China is sitting back and watching America like, what is, what the fuck of that idea? What is, what the fuck of that idea? Russia is like an old society.

They must be so confused. They have No idea. Russia's like an old society. They must be soaking. They have no idea. The things that we get into here, they're so confused. And then they're confused to learn that they started it all. When we invaded, we're not invaded. When we helped to support Ukraine, they must be like, what? And then when Gaza and Israel,

they're like, what side are they gonna be? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just everything we do, they must be like, yeah, Kanye come at Kanye, I mean, they must have got reports of Kanye on out. You can give like a Russian intelligence briefing, your briefing Putin, they're like, this guy going full nuts. Yeah, they're like, what the fuck? Because they have to study that.

They have to see like where, where we are in any given time. So the like the biggest celebrity in America. He's about to enforce it off Hitler. And then Putin's like, well, they're not gonna care that the Ukraine has assessed it. That is. No, the Russian cultural briefing on what's going on in America has to be

the chaotic crazy thing. They must have started funny. Like the first couple of years, they must have been like, America's, this is funny. And then now every day, it's gotta just be like, what?

Imagine the big Afghanistan, just like a dude in a dress. Yeah. They would clench their teeth and scream. They would be like, they would splatter. They would splatter. They would be like, what? They would splatter. Why are we doing? They must be confused.

No, thanks. Now they're just explaining trans-maggot to poop. I mean, they go, they go, so there's two, there's two movements that are merging. He's probably killing intelligence officers. He's probably like, this is not true. Yeah. But there's no way what you're telling me is happening.

He's like, they're on drugs. He's like, we send them over there. They can think they're to drugs. CIA fucks them up, sends them back. Oh my God. I tell areas. That's wonderful. It's so funny.

Yeah, you hear about that. I hear about that every time again. I'm glad that exists, but I never got the full fucking scale of that. It's so nice. Well, it's just so funny because like, you gotta imagine like, because the way they talk about it, they, they think like the way people say it, it's like China and or Russia is basically like, we gotta find like men to get branded in America.

Like, that's our strategy. Like our street, it's not about like ports and control of natural resources anymore. We got to find dudes who will say they're menstruating and like put them in a bowl and call it. And then fight about it for four years. For at least four years straight now. Which if they're doing it,

it's like the greatest and most hilarious attack plan ever. Perfect. Yeah. Genius. Just taking it, yeah's like the greatest and most hilarious attack plan ever. Perfect. Yeah. Genius. Just taking it. Yeah, making a guy join the swim team at Penn. Yeah. Shots the country down for five months.

Six months. Six months. That swimmer has been like 14 and Russian people. And they just go away. Where is Lee Atomas now? What? Where is Lee Atomas now? Like, shh.

I'll just disappear. Back in Nebraska. Back in Moscow. Back in Moscow. It's just a photo of Lee Atom. She's seven foot tall. There's all these Chinese people around her. She's welcome back as a hero.

She's probably a Chinese guy. Riding a tank going. She's in a Chinese aquarium, right? No, I'm not. This pops out of the water. Like, whoa. China Chinese aquarium cripple America economy for six months I for me. Oh, the side of the China Russia button all this is amazing. God damn them. But I have zero faith that it's them.

Yeah, everything is all us. Because we're a country that's just you have all the ingredients for the crazy that's going on. Yeah, you poison the food. He poisoned food for like 30 years. You make the drugs, the prescription drug. I mean, everything. Yeah, for real. All of it.

Over the counter. All that stuff. You give everybody that. You give an entire generation of kids, meth. You give them tired. 25 straight. And just stress everybody out. Shut all the world.

You breaking. And then you go, let's see what happens. Yeah, you're alone in the universe. Toss in your ductile. Yeah, Instagram. Instagram. It's the great. Let's see what happens. Yeah, you're alone in the universe tossing your talk. Yeah Let's reward people for you know shameless Been moaning in a guy's ear at home Depot Which those are funny What daddy?

Kiss the kiss guy. No, there's a guy who goes out in New York and his kisses the top of ball people's heads and it's the Fuck I love it. It's no they get furious people get mad. He's hitting like Honduran immigrants You know and they're they turn around though. I was hitting like he's gonna be a step that dude I don't know. He's a pretty big dude, so he creeps up behind people this goes Right on top of their head and they look up and they just dude they freeze is there's like what the fuck It's just big guy just going like by and he just slinks away It's just a funny like someone if if someone knew like back then like that was gonna replace like the Drew carriage that was gonna replace like the Drew carriage. Yeah, yeah. Who's on his anyway, gets replaced by.

He's like, you know, making guys sad about the sexuality. Yeah. It's like that one used to be home improvement. Now it's just a dude kissing bothering. Just two minutes of it, too. Just a great video. That's what you need. Yeah, four kisses.

You know, like, this is the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life. I've been watching a lot of drones bothering homeless people Just drones I would follow fat people with a tube Fat people turn around like you'll want the fuck I think I've seen I think I've seen people try to chase him and he plays it fast while running. Oh my god, I mean it's so funny.

It's so funny, you know. Yeah. It's objectively funny to play the two. If he plays any other issue, he's like, what is this guy doing? No, the tube is number one. No, it's not. Break it out of the tube and you're like, oh, I see. I think it was from family.

Yeah. Yeah, there's a family guy sketch where they're like copy that's a fat guy with a tuba Guy following a fat guy with the tuba and then a guy saw that was like well There's my career. I'm gonna do that Myself seven t-shirts Money Love in a game I think it is love the game and I guess eventually they get money, like eventually they get your own. I mean, get in trouble and uploading that must feel so good. It's probably like, wait till you guys fucking see what I did today. Yeah.

They'll throw an ad on it eventually. Yeah. They'll throw an ad on it eventually. Yeah. They'll probably buy more and more. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

They'll throw an ad on it eventually. Yeah. They'll throw an ad on it eventually. Yeah. They'll probably buy more and more. Yeah. Yeah. They'll probably buy more and more.

Yeah. They'll probably buy more and more. Yeah. They'll probably buy more and more. Yeah. They'll probably buy more and more. Yeah. Morgan and Morgan will get neck in. You get punched in the face after kissing a guy. Morgan, Morgan, Morgan. Have you been assaulted by Elmo at Times Square because you kissed him and grabbed the dick? We're gonna fuck you and fix that. We have 100 nationwide offices that can handle this.

Yeah, it started. That's like kind of where it started. The freaks out front of the Chinese theater in LA. The naked cowboy right that used to be something we all sat back and went look at that fucking weirdo Right now everyone's that yeah, I was trying to be that now. It's like that's a successful guy. Yeah, they go. No, that's the goal. Yeah Yes, terrifying Yeah, I remember thinking yeah, I remember watching reality TV And I was like oh this is gonna change people's personalities like that's nothing dude. That's just people arguing in a party Yeah, yeah, it's like a guy naked dress like the tin man

Like Yeah, I think reality TV helped us get the true That was a bridge that was it was like it's like that was like just shameless behave like it was a time when the idea of like You have an argument with your wife the idea of like three guys standing in a room would be insane. I'm not sure that punch stuck in the face. Yeah. And no one did anything. The cameras are there. He's the cameras. No one got the face. Nobody did anything. They're just with the cameras on. That's crazy. I saw a thing T.I. son. Did you see the clip of TI sun?

He went on Instagram live to yell at his mom and then TI beat him up. But how old is he? He's got to be a teenager. He looks like he's like in his very early teen life. And he's telling his mom on Instagram live. He's on Instagram. I don't know if it's his or somebody's Instagram live,

but he's on Instagram live in his mom's face. It's like the footage isn't the best as you can imagine, but TI looks as if that's how I'm kidding. TI gets in his mom's face. It's like the footage isn't the best as you can imagine. But it's like, TI gets in his face. You can't see it. He just, it's like an Instagram live and like, aside of his face, you're like, fuck you, fuck you.

There's a bunch of people chatting. He shuts it down. You're embarrassing your family. I know everyone says it, but thank God we didn't have social media like that. I would have gone on Instagram. I would have gone on Instagram live and cried so many times. Yeah, it's on my ass kick.

Fifth grade cry. I fucking boost my credit. Hit me just now. And we need to report this. My kids are trying to mother would have been making money. Yeah, like that's the thing. Like we could have turned that into. Yeah.

We could have turned that into gold, we could have turned that into gold Yeah, the right way. Yeah, true You know, just just she would just drive her man I would just sit in the front seat with the phone like this like go just talk Just talk it is reality TV is where you know definitely started because I remember when reality TV started every single family If you ever want to visit somebody's house They'd be like we could be a TV show. Oh, our family's so We should be a TV show and then they gave us all cameras and now everyone now everybody is a

True I remember that people would be like they'd be like they're missing out on gold They're missing out on gold not having cameras here. Just someone being like the mashed potatoes Sock and all it meant all it meant was just gold All it meant when they said we could be reality TV show is that we are Terrible people. Yeah, that's all it man. We're terrible We're terrible people and our youngest brother quotes anchor man. Yeah, that's all it is. It's hilarious That's all it is. We throw fits when we don't get exactly what we want.

We're terrible people. Yeah, that's what it was. Let us go man, should be a TV show. Well, let us go. Of everybody I know. In early days of Periscope, Louis Gomez, it was like years ago, walk home on Periscope.

And he'd film his walk home and I'm like, what do you do? He'd skate board, he'd ride his bike. Yeah, he was creating and I'd walk it. He'd just love his COVID updates. Oh my God. He did a live, he would go on live and just smoke a blunt on his fire.

He was hit high on his fire, he was going to be like, you know, the real interesting thing about that is like, it's so interesting. And he would never say what it was. He would be interested. It's so fucking interesting if you think about was. It's so fucking interesting. If you think about it, it was so fucking. Yeah, I would pay to watch Lewis's day.

Yeah, he is. He's great at that. I'd love to see it. Then there's the Jamaican episodes where he goes to Jamaica. Takes the whole, takes the whole cast. Takes the gas. Takes those oddities. Yeah.

That's freaks. Yeah. Those damage. Yeah, he is. He would be great actually. Yeah. Yeah, he's free. It was damaging. Yeah, he would be great, actually. Yeah. He'd be good. There's a few people that would be really good. Yeah.

I'd be terrible. I wouldn't be that. It would be unbelievable. Yeah, I would just be red. He's just being. Who else would be good? Lewis is probably my number one. Lewis be number one. There's nobody better than Lewis. Because a lot of the episodes would be good? Lewis is probably my number one. Lewis be number one. There's nobody better than Lewis.

No. Because a lot of the episodes would be he's almost about to fight someone at Best Buy. Yeah. And then people have to get involved. Like, he would just be like the camera guy. It's like, no, it's not worth it man. It's not worth it. And they're totally about it. And then 10 minutes later he's having the time.

Yeah, he's the best guy ever. He's just smoking weed, having fun. But a lot of the episodes would center around dragging him out of his strip mall before he's physically attacked. Like someone in a party supplies store. Who's like, fuck that, the balloon order for his son's party.

You know, you stupid whore. Like, you fucking whore. You said the funniest thing I've ever heard once. I don't know why. We spent Easter. One year, I was with him, his son, and like I had people there, we were having Easter at Amy Ruth's in Harlem.

And I don't know why this was the thing. He remembers us. And the waitress was, let's just say unmotivated, okay? Oh, he's on there fucking ass. Yes. And it's like Easter. So it's, okay? Oh, he's on their fucking ass It's like he starts to take you know who gives us your slew is called to match her over and said I quote is to maybe top five funniest things I've ever heard of my life he goes listening because we all want water he goes I know the waitress is getting a money sign tattooed on her stomach When she gets back we get some fucking water. He said it.

Oh my God. It was crazy. It's Easter. It was amazing. He's still my fit. My probably one of my like my top three people. Yeah. And ever. He's the best for real. I mean, I forget how much he loved him. And then when we were over here, just watching, we just watched his livestream of him playing Call of Duty. It's so fun. This is a full, it's a full, full, full,

full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full, full a fight someone on Twitter he goes I'll fight you right now. Didn't get a beef with fucking a anthem. No, no, no.

Open. What the fuck was that about? I don't know. I mean what? Yeah, true. I mean that's true. What's the meaning of life? That's that.

You know what I mean? That's. Yeah. It opens and out. Yeah. It's a broad question. Yeah. That's a broad one.

Yeah, I saw that. I'm like, what the fuck are they be fighting about but it's yeah, we know As shame hate seeing them fight It was fun In the fight I enjoy anytime of Lewis gets in the Twitter beef. I'm there. I'm watching he's bill for it Yes, the best was my early-grands digital when it was Ralph's apartment They would have the team meeting and I would go like we'd all sit there and Louis would have a team meeting, be like Glenn Gary Glenn Ross. And he'd walk in. He'd just like smoke and he's like talking about he's like, all right. What's the ad sales

division? And he's just like, this retarded woman from Staten Island. I went. I went. I went. I went. Like, someone who's like slow. Come on. And shot. You know? He was like a fat brother. This is like you. I'm like, I'm a boy.

Like, how are we looking? I don't know. I don't know. A monogal. That one knows. It'd be like someone who took like a five hour bus from Staten Island there. Who's like in like learning the same boat? And he'd be like, who took like a five-hour bus from satin iron there who's like in like learning disabled He'd be like you know computer figure out the fucking yeah

He'd be like Dan is gonna be handling our new ad sales division And she'd like sitting there like staring blankly There it is so method She's on someadone. Yeah. She's on some box and just foaming at the mouth. He's like, she's handling our integration, our vertical integration. There's a highlight this week I was watching.

A briefcase is a plastic bag. It's got a shopping bag. It's like, well, swams is plastic bag on a table. That's how to say it much. They had a reality show. We're going to do reality show. I mean, they should have done a reality show. Maybe you're doing it.

Sal from practical show. The show girl was producing it. And I think the people like, Sal like, like I think like his people, eventually we're like, I think they just don't look into this footage. Like what? Like what do you do?

Like you were a star on a huge show. You were gonna produce a show. They should still make this feel. No, it would be an amazing show. Yeah. So it's like, but Sal, Sal was like, yeah, we're going to do a show showing a pod, a young podcast network. And then I think eventually people let Warner brothers. We're like, wait a minute. What do they want want like they probably watch like people over at Sony? It just chug lows defending right

And then the people of Sony and they probably really like south. They probably like hey, this was great But we just feel we're going in different direction. We're gonna go in a different direction When the when no is it limits yet when he calls that woman from Staten Island a retard And she seems a little slow Who is it? Lewis? Yeah. When he calls that woman from Staten Island a retard and she seems a little slow, that's something that advertisers don't really want to get by. I don't really want to get into that. It would be the fucking best. I mean, think of it. Think of them turning it on more for the cameras. Oh, it's already crazy. Yeah. If you had some cameras in there and people would, yeah, yeah, there was actually they did a boxing match this week between

Another one. Yeah, yeah Dylan and crack Miko box. Oh, they did the rematch and there's a clip us on Twitter Where it's just forgets. He's the ref and just was watching In the clinch for like a minute When you're like Lewis, bring it up. I did that when I rep. I did that when I rep. I just stopped and watched it. Dude, I said,

I'm asking him on space out. I hear like, I don't go shit. People start yelling. I'm like, that way. I don't know what the fuck I'm like. When it started, it was in this little room. It was in spare room in apartment on Avenue Bay. And like, it would fit like four people tight and it was tight.

So if it was like me, Zach and Nico Lewis and Moan, and then the producer, and it was like tight. It was like tight. Didn't Lewis have a, I definitely talked about it. Did he have a all-tile apartment? Yes, he talked to me. I've never seen, you know, fully,

he had a fully all-tiled apartment with a like feral dog that lived there with a dog. It was like feral. That like, when a tack everyone had a full tile. I don't know where you would even find that. It was a bad find. He was like, one big bad find. That's awesome.

He's in there with a dog. He's the funniest. He is. For real. Oh, fuck. Well, yeah. That's pretty good. What is an hour has to be What a dense fucking 53 minutes. Yeah, it's a good 53 a great Fickately generous Lewis Gomez

Cover a lot Mountain just to clag like the tile apartment idea of just like to him, because you know, like he's like, changes dropping at the end of the night. Bottles just the sounds, dog, the dog getting into stuff, get all the trash, see me yelling at the dog, the echo is bouncing off the wall. The echo of the tile walls, him screaming at a dog makes me laugh so hard Of him but what was that dogs name? I wish I read it had such a funny fight It was like dude the best was Tommy Turner's mini-dobberman Smokey you smoke about smoke

His dude we did comedy with that would come home high and drunk and he had like a mini-dobberman That was like that was a full plum island creature like fucked up teeth one that I had like black homo eyes were gray and you come home and like give it like a whole to piece of stake he'd go on Facebook live yeah it'd be like look at this smoke you fuck you smoke you the dog you pick it up and the whole time he was holding it was like Oh, smoke Smokey yeah, that was good. Yeah, that was good. My friend had a mini I think also a mini Doberman used to give Wawa cappuccino to every morning and the dog got diabetes I didn't know he couldn't have done that. Yeah, what's wrong with him?

You're gonna ca a Gito for himself in a little like 12 ounce for his dog. He's a dog that weighed 10 pounds. I mean, dog, you could fucking 12 ounce just killed it with Wawa Kappuccino. Just killed his dog. That was a montage monster. Just someone along the island,

some pieces shit poison their dog with French vanilla creamer and then just had fucking and threw it in the bag. Yeah, no, he walked out to see real. He loves it. He's like he loves it. Yeah, probably does. The dog you the dog was hyped. You go over it. I mean, it must have been the worst dog possible. It's got to be other smoke smoke. You seem like for real the worst dog. And I like Tommy. So I don't want trashes dog, but. That was a bad dog.

Yeah, I'm a bad dog. Jack's blind. You got blind. My dog's fucking blind. Today 14 chocolate cupcakes. Oh, awesome sight. I swear to my blind right after. I had to fly him here.

So I had to put him on like a fake therapy dog vest and then walk a blind dog through the airport. That was crazy. It was it through the airport. It was it from the chocolate. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, it was it could see fine. And then it ate those 14 cupcakes and it was how did it get to 14? It was I was from my daughter's birthday party.

So we had like dozens of chocolate cupcakes stacked and he just pulled them off this bench and just tore through the box. Eight all of them. He was going for the second box and we found him. Did you go over to the mats house?'ll show you that this dog's blind. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's a good trick. Oh, you know, you know, you know, you're given like a snack in his head. Like you hold a piece of food and he's like, he's like noses,

fuck. So he doesn't know where he doesn't know anything. He just lays in the, we put him out in the sun now. He just lays. That's probably fine for him. He loves it. He's a really great dog. He's nice. Yeah. It's good. Got a yard, dude. Exactly. He, I really great don't he's nice. Oh, yeah, it's good. Got a yard dude. Exactly. He I'm telling you, he made out the best of us moving. He just lays. I think he just went blind. It's perfect. Perfect. You move to Texas. You go blind. You just lay out in the sun. That's what role trying to do. That's really what role trying to do. Just want someone to lead us out into the yard. Yeah, it's really all about. Yeah, it's about the CBD treat.

Yeah, these ladies are like, yeah, that's nice. Yeah, it's crazy. Good guy. Good guy. I think that's an episode. I think we did it. Tim. Thank you.

It was awesome. So fucking fun. You should rise, man. Kill me. We're going to do a Patreon episode. You won't stay. I'm going to do my own. Totally. It's never ended. I'm going to do that patreon episode you want to stay I'm gonna do my own I knew that was a Once he wants to go as when's the season finale?

If I get that so like there is interest never It's good. I thank you. Yeah, I appreciate it. Appreciate you