Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast - Ep 507 - Nakey Vacation (feat. Billy, Spud, & Charles Blyzniuk)

Episode Date: August 9, 2024

Support the D.A.W.G.Z. @ patreon.com/MSsecretpod Support Warmode @ https://www.patreon.com/warmode Go See Matt Live @ mattmccusker.com/dates Go See Shane Live @ shanemgillis.com Get Merch @ mssecretpodcast.com/merch Yo0o00o0. TGIF brothers and sisters. Matts in Phoenix Arizona (go see him) so SG held it down with the broz in Philly. William Andrew Shang and Charles all in Warmode HQ choppin it up ol school. Please enjoy. Have a great weekend!! God Bless. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/MSSP and get on your way to being your best self. Support the show & get Lucy Breakers for 20% off & free shipping at https://www.lucy.co promo code DRENCHED Visit https://www.draftkings.com/ and use code SECRET for exclusive offers today! 

If not, it's recording on here and we can do how podcast should be audio only. Audio only. You know, you know, I like that. I'm tired of people commenting on my physical features. Yeah, I don't like that shit. Should take a picture and then like hold it up like a still image. Yeah. And then just the audio. Yeah. I don't know. Even my nicest, I got AI myself.

They've been doing that. What's that? They've been doing that. AI and that? They've been doing that. AI and me? No, no, no, AI and major things that are happening right now. Oh, nice. Like what? Kamala Harris' event.

They've, oh yeah, yeah, yeah. They're coming out saying the shit is an AI generated image. Look at this massive fucking crowd, and it's just AI generated. The Leah Khor Center's got me fuming, bro. It's like against the law, right? They do that with Taylor Swift They just try to bomb a Taylor Swift fuck on the chiefs tailors Like a really hot picture of Taylor Swift, oh, yeah getting like

It was my chief's pants. Oh, the AIF. And, you know, it was clear. Wait, that wasn't real? Yeah. Fuck, I jacked off to a cut there. No, it was like, yeah, that was, I saw it briefly. And then later on, I was like, I'd like to see that again, just for research on this.

They didn't even find it. They took it down. What the hell? They took it down. And they, like, had a congressional hearing about it or something. It's like against the law to make, like, or they're trying to make it against the law, aren't they?

Or like, make a. You can't, like, that seems too close to being able to make like or they're trying to make it against aren't they we'd like make You can't like it seems too close to being able to like draw a new that's what I mean. It's Bordering Charlie Hebdo could draw some nudes You ever get a picture see yourself when uber eats takes a picture of you I have a holding the bag. Like a big game hunter. Just. That is tough.

Third time today. Case closed. Two marinas, please. I want to see if I can find one. Oh wait, they keep them in there? Fuck, dude, I must have a gallery. Insane gallery. Yeah, I've saved a couple of, just like long basketball shorts. Yeah, I've saved a couple of just like long

basketball shorts. Yeah, I was like, let me take a picture of you. I'm like, you're making fun of me and you know, I have to do for the app. Yeah, logging into a like airports have those where they just take a picture of your face. The cameras at a desk level. It's just you going. Not just got my license again. Really? Ooh. Another brutal, insane photo. Yeah. Oh yeah. I showed you my, he was like, do you want to retake it?

And you gotta be a man. You gotta go. No, I don't care. Nah, that doesn't matter. Just have that for the next six years. I did that with the retarded you by your pants. Yeah. The one, the one you got to put that all the way to him, bro. Don't be scared to tug on that arm. You know, it's all special needs by your parents. Yeah, yeah. Dude took my picture and it was so,

I gained like 30 pounds in the pig. And he's like, is that good? I was like, it's good, man, thanks. Yeah, thank you very much. You're doing great. And I drove for like five minutes in like a swirl, being like, that's what I look like. That's what I look like.

Yeah, I see myself in pictures all the time. It just fucking kills me. I had to take some this morning. Insane. For what? I just woke up and got coffee and people asked for a photo. Oh. And it's a selfie. So you just see your own face. Like right when you look at it, you're like, oh fuck.

Looks like you just got punched in the eyes. Just the fattest swollen face going. That's why Ye crushes that hood, dude Yeah, I get the full face sipper Actually might be nice I got some brutal photos from that Just I mean do you have spade he was the boss was behind him Yes. Oh shit shit. Yeah. They got so fucked up. I got so fucked up from not sleeping. I was so fucked up from not sleeping when I came back from my trip and I got a little drunk at

pool. Right. And dude, late at night, I was so wired. EJ was like, how are you still awake, dude? And I was like, I don't know. And we're just talking. And like, this is, I don't even know how to put this in words, but I was so like tired and emotional. I started talking about this like thing where Bruce Springsteen was dealing with the Vietnam vets during Born in the USA, you know, and I was like trying not to cry, just telling him about a fucking documentary. Now, that's where I get emotional. We're talking about the boss.

And I was like getting all fucking in my feelings about it. I've had that a lot lately. I got hung over an emotional this yesterday. Did you cry? I was close and it was the most embarrassing part. Revenge of the Sith with bad manners. I said, I love you, I can't go with you. And I was on the couch going,

I was like, this is really good acting. Natalie Forbes is like really good. Yeah, I don't know why. I just been like, I don't know if it's like 5G or I'm just becoming softer. It's 5G, dude. It's 5G. It's 5G.

You're killing our testosterone. Like, I don't know, maybe Reggie and Stevie are just making me soft. But I see shit now. And I'm just like, fuck. Your dogs are making you soft? Yeah. Yeah, you love your dogs.

You love Reggie and Stevie love them until you see them. I'll kill for them. I get fucking destroyed by Puerto Ricans every time I take them out on the day. Oh my God, Catalina! I'm like, fuck. I remember revisiting when Zeus was dying and I was crying.

Catalina. Oh. When Zeus was dying and I was crying, I go, what's gonna happen, man? And you're like, you're just gonna get up. It's gonna be another day, dude. What's your problem? I was a kid, man.

Yeah, you were a little fucking dickhead. I was just having fun. A few years ago, you're just gonna get up. It's gonna be another day, dude. What's your problem? Remember that? I was a kid, man. Yeah, you were a little fucking dickhead. I was just having fun. A few years ago, you were a little hard ass. How would you feel if you were me? If I was me dying and my best pal's dog was dying? I'd say we gotta get over this. Obviously it's sad.

I gave him some days to grieve. I don't wanna think about them fucking dying. I think about everyone dying and just fucking destroying. You turned her against me. Yeah. It's nice. I don't want to think about them fucking dying. I think about everyone dying and just It's nice this fucking rules It's nice yeah, or use blizzards Mike that might be easier. Oh, yeah Yeah, blizzards anytime spades starts talking just put it in his face pause. We said bills Anakin Yeah, yeah blizzards anytime spade starts talking just put it in his face pause He claims I'll be so hard

Fucking dude Trump got fucking endorsed by a moss full-throated That's what he said he's like Elon Musk supports me full-throated. Where'd he do it? That's what he said. He's like, Elon Musk supports me full throated. Trump the hug's starting to say some wild stuff. He's getting old. He's getting old. He's getting real old. That's what my mom hit that shit where it was, uh, I just liked that trade the speech he did with all the black checks and said they were 35 minutes late. Amazing. He was just like, well, I'm like, I just like him because he just doesn't give a crap.'s like yeah I'm on my grades real renegade that's what I want out of a president obviously dude walls is a fucking freak I don't

know hey stolen Valor guy like you here stolen Valor I could never stolen Valor and then merch Harris Walls merch is like tree camo. Yeah, real tree. Yeah The the non-binary are trying to take real tree back Mossy oak and real trees like in their fucking gear now. That's all it's only for guys like us It's only for hunters like us. Yeah, I've never shot. Yeah, right Hunter's we're in tree camo holding up the Uber Eats. If I have a fat pussy crying during your bend, it's gonna be fucking Uber Eats. I would make a face like I took a shot

if I had to cut a deer. It's like, ugh. I'd be very sad, dude. It's fucking gross. It is gross. I've been around. It's disgusting. It's fucking disgusting.

When they're hanging stuff? A dude's in a garage cutting a deer. And they're like, dude, it's great beef jerky. And the beef jerky has like fucking hair. It sucks, dude. Fucking wild Bill's beef jerky is good as shit. It a guy in my, when I worked in a car dealership at once a week during deer season, he would bring in deer.

Like he'd bring in like a crock pot of like a. Isn't there like a nuclear plant near you too? Yeah. Interesting. Just the worst beef jerky on the planet. Jammed. Everyone's jammed. Just deer with six heads.

I was just talking to a dude about that. He lives in the one up near like Levittown or some shit. And I was like, bro, do you just like fucking stare at that thing and just wait for it to pop? Yeah, it's fun to stare at. But like, dude, that's fucking scary. Every time I cross that bridge, I stare at it. I go, ooh, three mile out.

I get excited every time. I say, ooh, the mighty Susquehanna. That's every time he spades. Every time I drive over and I go, the mighty Susquehanna. The mighty Susquehanna. That's every time I mean spades. Every time I drive over, I go to the mighty Susquehanna. The mighty Susquehanna. It is mighty. It's fucking huge. It's big and mighty.

I like big rivers. There's no denying a good big river. What do you think about the Axe, bro? Fully modded, fully modded telecaster. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, leave it up there. It's not in tune. Fully modded tele. Hold on, let me tell you how sick the axes were, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, boys. Me and Blizz went to both. Because we were there Friday and they were like, the boss is coming tomorrow. And it was like, well, I guess, you know, we had a couple of drinks.

I was like, I'll definitely be there. Woke up yesterday or Saturday, just hurt. I was like, fuck, I got to go back to that again. Then, you know, you get there, you get a couple of suds, you get a whole shit. Boss and the Lumineers are going to be on there. What's the difference between being on stage with you just doing Sam common and live music that has to be like eons better. It was the most uncomfortable I've ever been, bro.

It was, were you drunk? Even watching it from the. No, I wasn't like hammered yet. Dude, that's like going to a wedding and being like, come on, get on the dance floor. Time fucking 90 million and everyone else has a guitar and can just go like this. Air guitar bro, you have to. I hit an air guitar for about five seconds and then most of the time stood completely upright with my hand in my pocket while everyone else was dancing.

It was fucking, it was crazy. You just keep getting in these situations. People were asking. They sent me out too early. Was that? They sent me out so early. They sent me out so early. I was out there for eight minutes.

There was like two solos before you. It was like two guys like wailing on like a banjo. At one point I was just like facing out away from the, you ever see that? You like Jim Morrison? Did you ever see the Dutch national team, soccer team, where they have like special needs kids? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then there's a bro with downs in front going. Yeah. I was literally doing that. I was standing on the edge of the stage by myself just going, whoa, look at all this. And then I turned around and it was Bruce Springsteen was right behind me, played a guitar and he was like, yeah, for real, like, holding back, throw up.

People with my friends were down there like dance. I could see my friends were down there like, dance. I could see my friends like, you gotta do something. You should start air humping. They started asking security, they were like, can somebody get him off stage? You're a bodybuilder? He's scared, my friends. They're like, he's fucked up, we gotta get him out of there.

I would fucking melt, dude. It was, yeah, hold on, I'll show you a fucking video of it. And well, I guess after, you can literally see me going. I always thought about that, cause like I watch videos like Stevie Ray Vaughn perform and like, stand up must feel cool when like you go out and everyone like fucking freaks out. But if you're ripping through a solo on cocaine,

I don't think there's a feeling that comes anywhere fucking close to that. No, dude. That was me the entire time. I don't think there's a feeling that comes anywhere fucking close to that. No, dude. That was me the entire time. Oh my God, bro. It's kind of sick though. Yeah, I mean it was the coolest shit possible, but then you went home and watched star wars and cried the next day. I watched star wars and cried. There's no good allegations on you, dude.

The allegations are strong. I want someone to just make a highlight tape of you meeting Aaron judge going out on stage. It's getting worse. Here comes the boom. Tism is for real getting significantly worse. I just don't know what to do in those situations. And everyone else has a guitar. Also. Yeah. You think you know the words to the song until you get on that stage. Oh no. And you go, I have no idea where I am. Everyone else has headphones.

Yeah. So they can hear where you're at in the song. I had nothing. I was just up there like, They wanted you to sing? Yeah, you have to sing the one part of it. But then they would be like, come on, jump in and sing the whole thing.

It was like, I have no, I don't know. I'm like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like,

I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, Just the wrong lip sync is the greatest maybe I had nothing but wrong lip syncs the entire time You got it to Ashley Simpson day, and then they had they had earphones so they could hear me singing and dudes be like Things is here you breathing Yeah, that's fucking terrifying. Hold on. This lady is. Watch this live. Yeah, I got to see it live. The audience did very much enjoy it. I mean, they went crazy.

It was awesome. Maybe it was really cool. It was pretty back stage. They like it literally as soon as Bruce Springsteen gets off stage, they like cardam to his dressing room and then they like block it off. And then we walked and there's like two dudes with like very intense goatees blocking Bruce Springsteen's thing. Six walks by and he goes, yo, what's up? Who's back to the boss? Nice.

Six and six. Two dimensions at once. How about six? And then he just walks off stage and he's like, Oh, I'm gonna go to the gym. I'm gonna go to the gym. And then he's like, Oh, I'm gonna go to the gym. And then he's like, Oh, I'm gonna go to the boss. Nice. Six and six and two dimensions at once. How about six? And then he just leave. He just is by himself. He's always like, I need smoke a cigarette.

I walk this walk around the stadium. He gets lost in the stadium. I'll get a text like, yo, they're not letting me off there. I'll just meet you guys at Bonner's later. Yeah, it's like, dude, how far out of the stadium did you go? What the fuck? how crazy is this sounds like people are dying people are going oh my fucking god dude here's the one there's them doing. Look at this. There's him doing the Trump dance. And then there's Bruce Springsteen.

The Trump dance. Right there. Also a telly man. It was. Like his early work. It was awesome. Zach Bryan's the bro. Lumineers are the bros.

Really? Couldn't be. Might've been the nicest. He and Wesley and his wife, they're like the nicest people. They're probably the best fans too. Cause everyone I know who likes the Lumineers is very easy going.

Yeah. It's very nice. How about the car? On the way back. So, Blizz is just sitting in the back next to the lead singer, the Lumineers. And he's like, why don't we play my new album? We're like, yeah, definitely. He puts it on, he's like, turn it the fuck up. Put it the whole way up. play my new album? We're like, yeah, definitely puts it on. He's like, turn it the fuck up.

Put it the whole way up. Blast this shit. We're like, sick. Then he starts singing with it. Yeah. In a bucket seat next to Blizz and Blizz is like, yeah, I just had to smile and be like, thank you for playing this. It's really nice.

And he's just like, keep singing. I don't know what to say to this, but it sounds good, man. Rocks our lifestyle might not make it Time to cry during Padme That's the time to do it George Lucas pull it out of you Lucas. Yeah, bro Spielberg's making a movie from the viewpoint of the evil man in a horror film It's fucking scary. She's it's called perspective. I think it's just the fucking this entity that goes around a little scary I just fucking maxed out on the shining shining rules. That's as scary as I'll get it's really scary

Did you watch long legs It's really scary Did you watch long legs? No, I'm not Stevie red you're getting into some yeah, it's our Good Stevie fucking eat so much shit. It's fucking disgusting Hey you with that shit breath. Oh, come here. It's just immediate fucking shit. My sister's dog Reagan's has the worst breath of all time He'll just come up to you. He's the best guy. He's just a big, fat old dog. And he'll come up and he's so nice and then he'll breathe. And you're just like, Oh my God, they got that.

It's too late. But yeah, that was that was about as cool as it gets. Yes, I do. The worst part is I get up there. Everyone's doing solos. I got to stand there Or try to dance. There's only one other guy on stage without an instrument and he's the hottest, most charismatic dude on earth.

Just the hottest guy on earth. Just run around, be like, yeah, get the fuck up. Run around the stage. It's like J.C. with Kid Rock. He was a hype beast. There was one part of girl at the end was holding up, like you know how they write things on how they're holding up.

And she was like, to me, and I was like, hey, what's this say? It was like, the guy in the green shirt is the hottest guy of all time. I was like, yeah, all right, see ya, see ya. I watch a lot of those compilations of like, chicks at rap concerts with their boyfriends, like I will fuck you right now,

and her boyfriend's right behind him. That fucking hurts. Yeah, you can't watch that. That's the devil. Obviously. Oh my god. Spade sends me devilish shit sometimes. He sent me shit last night where he was a fucking man

on the street interviews. And the chick goes back with all the dudes. And it's like, I only fuck these guys. No. There's a dude that's going around going, will you cheat on your boy? Are you going to get him back? What?

Microphone. Microphone. Please give me the microphone. There's a dude that does, like, on the street interviews with girls. And he's like, you know, are you going to get them back? What microphone microphone? There's a dude that does like on the street interviews with girls and he's like, you know, are you going to, are you going to make them pay for that? You're going to get them back and go, oh yeah, I'm out tonight. I'm cheating the night. Never saw this. No.

Well, we live in a fallen state, bro. She gets so sad. Spade just wanted to brave heart last night. Yeah. Do you guys, have you guys been watching the Kensington Avenue livestream cameras? I support it. OK.

I drive up it every Tuesday. Yeah, you see it. You see it real life. It's kind of getting cleaner, honestly. I know. Really? Yeah. Like, in regards to Kensington.

That's Kamala's, bro. Now it's the new mayor of Philly. She's a motherfucker, supposedly. That's Kamala, bro. Chinese woman. I think she's Chinese. I think it's time to give Kamala some credit. Shut the fuck up. She's a motherfucker. Chinese woman. I think she's Chinese. I think it's time to give Kamala some credit. Shut the fuck.

You're a comedian for Kamala. Sometimes you wish you were black. All right. No, that's a dagger. You know that's a dagger. Or you're just a white dude for Kamala. Was that Stiller that said that? Stiller wishes he was black.

Kamala, man, you've never been there? Yeah, obviously. I had G-Unit, the massacre album, bro. I would draw G album, bro. I draw. I would draw G unit. Even Tony A. I was jacked in my pictures. How cool were those fucking tank for him? I wish I had a boxy. I remember that was like a string bikini. Yeah, I remember I was, I would drive through Philadelphia every now and then with like Tom or Matt and all the black kids had the real long Jordan shorts that had the cool fucking thing at the bottom and I just had

no clue where to get them and it was all my all my gear was blank t-shirts from footlocker and the footlocker fucking shorts. You just see your dick so obviously. Speaking of that today is awfully windy and I walked outside today in this. Grey sweatsuit. Tiniest penis on earth. I had to put my hand in my pocket to hide it. I was walking down the street. My clothes were air. Yeah, you look like you were vacuum sealed. It might look like you're vacuum sealed in the front of me.

It's just nubbed it the whole way down. Well, one pocket and it's just so obvious. And just that's just so obvious. I didn't just. That's just my hand. Walk backwards. And it's just like the line. I was like, at least the walk backs can be nice because the wind's blown that way. Nope.

Same thing. Vacuum seal. Dong. Again. So the century people see me. They're like, that's what fucking blows. I see it on Instagram. Now I've dudes taking pictures of you. That's fucking slow. You just cry.

This is what you have going on with your life. You fucking idiot. I don't think I'm taking mean pictures of me. No, no, no. I'm like Shane. Hey, Shane, you're very nice enough, but it's just like I told spade, like I don't even get paparazzi anymore because there's Google. It's like if you want to see a picture, just Google Shane instead. It's like, oh, Shane, huh? And you might get someone gets you on a windy day. You might get Shane Gillis fappening picks. I, if somebody got a photo of that today, I've ruined it. Imagine if they got you out like the bigger, it couldn'tappening pics. I, if somebody got a photo of that today, I'm ruined, dude. Imagine if the guy you want to be a bigger,

it couldn't be a bigger no. If you're, you better not go on vacation naked. Fuck, I'll never, I'll never be naked. Naked on a balcony, I jump. If someone called me naked on a balcony, like somewhat, I drop my fucking wallet or some shit, like turn around, inch and a half. It's game over. Like they're fucking doing mean shit to people taking random like it's cool

If you're like fucking Jill and Hall or aphlec aphlec gets fuck constantly That dude's just trying to survive and it's like he's going through like snow if you took a picture of me while I was having sniz Problems dude, you would call suicide. That's a scream And then it's like dude he looks like shit. That's it. That's why, yeah. And then it's like dude, he looks like shit. It's like you look like shit too. Yeah dude. It's like when you see the Britney Spears

or like Kanye West freak out on Pauper Atzi, it's like yeah, they're having a bad day. Yeah. Let him. Especially they're aggressive as fuck. Let him sucker punch this guy. I only had that one freak out was the autograph guy after the show.

Oh yeah. The first helium show I had, this is as close as I've gotten to a spaz. Did you? They do the, they get autographs and they don't go to the show. They just show up and get autographs and sell them. And they need to get a picture with the autograph

to like verify it. So I just had a fucking awful set. I just bombed in front of all my friends. Shane, you're my hero. And these dudes were like, oh, that was a great show, man. I was like, yeah, what was your favorite joke? Because I knew they didn't go in. And then he was like, ah, sold out so fast.

Couldn't get tickets, but loved you on billions. I was like, you read the wrong bio. That was so dirty. You fucker. And then the guy was like, can I get it? I took like three pictures with three different guys. And then the last guy was just like, I gotta go. And he was like, fucking Jag off.

Was he Australian? He's like, oh, you gonna big time me, dude? I was like, oh man. Yeah, the fucking crazy thing is. You know what was just happening that day? Dude, this is cool. What's the sig going for? That's what you take the umbrella to him.

What's the sig going for? No, I have no idea. The SG sig at least has to be 50. No, it's gotta be a $4. A little 50 spot for the SG. $2.50. I'm just ripping off sweet girlfriends. That's either ripping off.

Really? Yeah, there's some good ass thing. Good point. It's like, what do I get my boyfriend? I'll get him this. Yeah, I had a Trello and signed fucking card and plaque. What's this? Trump autograph, I got you.

What? It's here. That thing should be framed. Obviously. That should be in here. I'll get it in here. Don't you worry about that. I won't break my heart.

I won't break your rakey breaky. I know you're on thin ice right now, dude. Life gets tough sometimes, but you'll make it. No, I'm good today. Today I'm feeling... I couldn't imagine that. Yeah, that does suck. Just all your bad days getting pictures taken stuff like that

Why can't we just go top golf? I just want to go to top golf Sail it. They got a correction driver. I like top golf. They used to have stand-up at top golf Remember that was in Jersey. It's fun. It was like Matt's comeback. Yeah Yeah, I think I'm just gonna do top golf from now on You say I might just tour top golf it's the best place on the fucking planet is the best I Enjoy it. Where did you get all this gear? I went to Nike calm good. You expensive polos are they? Oh, yeah I think they're like 60 bucks. That's pretty fucking expensive Yes

90 sure that's easy $90. wearing a shirt. I said 90 shirt. That's easy. $90. Nah, I think 45 on dark sports. Bro, come on. What was it? Dark sports? Dark sports is for the twisted bodybuilders.

I just saw Dorian Yates have and I worshiped that. They would ground that man walks on. So I was like, damn, sick, Cheryl, get it. They got me on the merch. I was like, that's merch. Got your ass. I feel nice merch got your ass I Feel gay for even talking about taking pictures of people that was embarrassing. No No, yeah, everything's fine. There's no go Shane Gillis. I'm Damien Lewis from billions

Spade saw him in the fuck accidentally on one of our videos were space travel He went to New York and there was this fucking like Maybe unhoused person would just like dude like you got we got a fucking chill and behind Spade talking this dude Just Damien Lewis talking at the bar You say what's up, or did you not even notice him until I saw You were just with a homeless? Yeah he was just shooting the piece. They'll get me at the bar. Yeah they just come in and

like there's my guy. Yeah yeah he'll chat. Some dude some bum just hit me up the other day. I was walking down the street he goes yo which way's the bus? I was like I don't know dude but the train the septa l is right there. The l is on Gerard. I was like yeah I don't know dude, but the train the septa L is right there The L's on Gerard was again and goes up front tree goes. All right, what's your name? Billy he's like Billy the kid Like this you're just watching my whole entire life he's always a guardian angel I know he was doing heroin Billy the kid it's kind of nice. But yeah, I have a similar problem where I am just like a homeless person comes up to me. What's your name Charles? And then 45 minutes later, they're like, this is what you have to apologize differently. You have to say sorry.

You can't say sorry because then you're sorry. And I'm like, yes, it's like, and he's like, by the way, can you buy me like $45 or the cigarettes? I'm like, okay, sure. Like, and he's like, by the way, can you buy me like $45 or the cigarettes? I'm like, okay, sure. They get you on the six. Guy got me like three weeks ago, heading into Primo's Higgies. Oh yeah. I drilled me. He just followed me and he was like, can you give me a bag of chips? I was like, yeah, dude, I'll definitely get salt and vinegar.

That's a wild, no beverage. That's self harm. If you crush salt and vinegar, no beverage. That's a wild deal with no beverage. Tim. That's self harm. If you crush salt and vinegar, no beverage. That's fucking crazy. Dude, there's a hot day. This guy sat outside and crushed salt and vinnies and it ran out of square bar. That puts his health bar full though.

And he's right. I remember just sprinting. They've been chasing people. I know two chicks that have gotten chased on Front Street. They're running, they're fired up, dude. I know two chicks that have gotten chased on Front Street. Easy pickups. They're fired up, dude. I would love that. Just having five minutes of what the fuck's

going through their head is probably so freeing. There was a lady that followed, me and Beezer were walking, and the lady was like a block away, and she was moving, and it was like, fuck, she's gonna get us. We saw her attack somebody with like a stick. She had like a broomstick, and she was like,

ah, yeah, get the fuck out of here. I'm gonna quote her on this. She's like, oh, city had like a broomstick and she was like, ah yeah, get the fuck outta here. I'm gonna quote her on this, she's like, oh, city of fuckin' faggots. Fuck, who did she thank? Ladies got a point. It might've been. Oh, Ben Folds. Ben Folds, she goes, thanks a lot, Ben Folds,

we got a whole generation of faggots. Holy fuck. It's like. She was gaining on us. I was talking to Six about that, it's like literally a Benfold song or video had to be the last thing she saw before she just like went offline the brain broke. Yeah. Whatever it was might be 5G bro. 5G is making us cry. No, I mean dude, for real. Like I know like you think I'm fucking around, but it actually fucks with your emotions. Don't roll your eyes, bro. I'm telling you it had like they put it all over the place before. Go. You love and you got some dogs.

I don't know. It was before that. It was before that. I swear to God, during COVID. It just kicked the 5G up when you fell in love and got dogs. Yes. They put, dude, they got a box right outside my house. There's a 5G box out here. There's a little box right on the top of the telephone ball won't shoot it. I

Don't fuck with that shit All right, just I'll just say this back in there Back in the early 1900s. I'm not getting defensive to it. I'm just worried about you me. Yeah, and your 5g radiation poisoning worried about you. Me? And your 5G radiation poisoning. Before, in the 1900s, maybe early 1800s, there was all these farmers absolutely fine. They got all the radio waves.

All of them started getting fucking heart attacks and shit. Just know that. What years? Early 1900s or late 1800s, whenever the radios came out. It happened to all the animals at the Philadelphia Zoo as well. They got them. They all started like heart problems and getting fucked up because they put radio lines all around for like communication Obviously, you don't even know how good you're supposed to feel. Yeah

Get destroyed bro Everyone else they didn't seem bothered back then their lives were shit. No way see nothing No, they weren't bothered. Huh? How do you know they weren't they seem to be somewhat happy? What do you mean just having fun? When they work chilled? Who told you they were having a good time? Do the thing about Tim Walls when you look? Having a blast in that 1800s. I mean if you look at pictures from the 50s and stuff, it looks cool that 1800s. I mean, if you look at pictures from the fifties and stuff, it looks cool.

What pictures are you looking at? Nuclear family, people like having a good time. Yeah. Those cookouts. I actually been listening to just blasting sigs for real, destroying f**king sigs. We walked, we drove by the Marlboro plant. That thing looks like f**king the Death Star on the ground. It's in like Virginia. Some shit looks fucking. It's all kind of fires me up when I see it. What I support them. I support big tobacco when I see that for real. Yeah.

You drive past a giant factory like dude, America's number one. Yeah. Spade is full spades borderline jingles right now. He loves America so much after being in the Middle East. Oh, yeah. Damn. Have you been able to find authentic cuisine back here? It's immediate shits bro. I'm not into it. Hey dude I want to be a first-worlder. You know I don't want to take a step down. You don't like Egyptian cuisine? No. What were they grubbing on?

Actually I do like the kebabs they're just straight-up meat on a stick. That You don't like Egyptian cuisine? What were they grubbing on? Actually, I do like the kebabs. They're just straight-up meat on a stick. That sounds fun Gives you halitosis those supposedly they crush peppers constantly and onions. I Taste that shit for like three days if I eat it. Yeah Stays on your stays on your fingies Sick. Oh, I gotta take a piss. Can we pause? Yeah. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. What are your self-care non-negotiables?

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is an addictive chemical. My god guys, please I'll be in Phoenix tonight when you see this video or this video podcast an addictive chemical. I'll be in a bunch of different places. Town hall in New York and Tyson's Capital One hall in Tyson's Virginia. Please go. Thank you. Yeah, I do. We're back. If I'm taking a shower and it's me, ready, Stevie and my girlfriend, I go into my bathroom and lock the door.

I do it all the time. You have to lock doors. It's just a natural fucking reflex. It's not a psycho shit that they doesn't think doors or door of knobs. It's fucking crazy Out of me. I would freak out I'd see when I was doing my bathroom a while ago I had no bathroom door because the tile was all dry and shit like that I would just stare at that until I fell asleep just in case something was coming for me. Yes, okay

I think in a past life. I was fucking murdered You think? Anytime. Can you take a shower? Close your eyes. What? If I have my eyes closed in the shower, it's immediately like there's someone right in front of your face. It's 5G. It's 5G or I'm the biggest pussy. 5G's got you spooked.

Dude, if I was in a foxhole I'd freeze. Just piss myself. I feel like those Ukrainian dudes getting drone bombs Bodies go for I those are the worst Fucking explode those in the you know fucking awful that must be just see a shitty drone It's like a team who fucking It's not yeah at all. So the worst week of your life. It's like force conscription. You're like, you're like buying a sandwich and then just like

military guys are like, you go now. And then you're like, just pull you into a van and then you get drone bombed like a couple days later. Yeah, you got to become like a king. Like a shitty grenade. Yeah, one they made up. They barely die. Yeah, their lands next one blows off

like their leg and they're like, Oh my God, they just had to bleed out. Self-revive, self-revive. It's really bad. Yeah. I don't fuck with that at all. I don't like wars. You know, I just want people to stop dying. Yeah. I yeah same Think it's a simulation I did it I had a dangerous you talk about closing your eyes in the shower I had a dangerous I I took the subway here and You got I mean already already I gotta stop But I like I like sat down. I was just like ghost bro If you waltz on the subway, dude, some crackhead sees you like, fuck dude, I just took a picture for you. I, when I,

I mean just a compilation of security footage. It's a Freddick's worst nightmare. I thought I was done for. I literally slender into who's in Center City I went down in the Market Frankfurt line and as soon as I went down there were two dudes on bicycles like riding towards me I'm finished is this you have the shine they're about to joust me. They are your little shining girls coming after you. Yeah, the two dudes is like black dude has to come from Miami and save you. I mean, look, I know I've made you tell the story a million

times, but please don't get chased home. Yes. You guys have never heard. Oh yeah. When I got, all right, well I first never heard. Oh, yeah when I got it. All right. Well, I first got it you won't so smoothly. It's scary It might be I was just as the day after the George Floyd stuff when there was like the riots and the fucking looting and All that shit and I peaceful protests. Yes, my apologies for personal privilege I I was like I got on my bike. I was like, let me ride around and like just watch take the shit. Yeah. Yeah. Let me take it in. And I like hung out. I like what? Dude, it dirt like in the middle of all that shit.

It was like fine because no one was like everyone was focused on the bag. Yeah. I wanted to get their shit. They weren't worried about these for George. It was the windows of a North face. Yeah, it's literally there is just sure a Lululemon, the name of our slain brethren. It literally looked like a hold to like another dimension from the North face window. It was like a person shaped hole and then dudes were just like jumping in. You saw the entities. There was a, there's a little bit of a coffee shop open next door and I was like, I like got a coffee and watched it take like thousands of dollars of shit.

Yeah. You paid for a coffee. Yeah. But yeah, that was fine. And then I biked home and then a dude on a city bike. I was like, buy my house in North Philly before and a dude on a city bike like rode up to me and he's like, how much your bike cost? And I was like, no, it's like, no, it's like, I'm not telling you, not for sale. And then he like, I started riding away and he like rode next to me and he had gears on that bitch No, it's just one damn. I know gotta get a mountain bike. You're doing this shit. You need a mountain bike Would be nice. It looks a little bit. Yeah It also looks a little bit more like

PPA just got laced with them. They got mountain bike. They all have mountain bikes now. Yeah like PPA just got laced with them. They got mountain bikes. They all have mountain bikes now. Yeah. That's a, you should go up to say how much take a PPA person's mountain bike. Try that move on them. How much did it cost? Assault a federal agent. Damn. But yeah, he, I mean, he just commandeered me. Did he take it? Yeah. Made me get off of it. I know. It's a fixie. If you stop,

yeah, it was like, it was literally like an exchange. He like had his, you got the reason I, what you got the city bike. Yeah. He was like, you can have this one. Fair trade. I was like, all right, whatever. I'll take it. But, uh, I'm an ally by the way. It wasn't, yeah, it wasn truly like I don't know. I in a situation like that I'm like he has his hand in his pocket. He's like wearing like a hoodie and like a face like a bag of skittles Yeah hood up hoodie on thank you for I was like you can just have it whatever yeah, and then I get a new one anyway I mean, yeah, you got that city bike

Been riding that ever since actually I got a new I got a new one, but yeah, it was like a trade Yeah, now they're gonna find me. Yeah, I literally I earlier today I was like I was in an uber and I saw a bike that Looked like the one that got taken parked outside of like a boat Over way right here The uber just In the cargo Pull over wait right here Hold on give me the other one. Yeah, I got chased home coming home from the grocery store. It was summer. So Already coming. Oh, you heard this in the background. You heard it too. I've never heard it. Oh dude I was coming up in the grocery store. Yeah, I like I talk about this instead of but

Let's come from the grocery store and there was like a dude Who was I was like waiting across Broad Street and there's just like an old old guy on like a bike and he was just already Just talking shit at me. Yeah Just like yelling at me and then I Just didn't I just didn't't just carrying shit and then he wrote by me he's like I never seen someone so pussy in my mom oh yeah yeah pussy it was like a little mountain bike jigsaw dude And then dude I like I just kept crossing the street He rode by me and then I like look behind me and he's like circling around and he started chasing me chase me home

Did you catch you? No, I like you drop you no, dude. I was I didn't lose anything and then I almost got hit by a car because I ran up Broad Street and then I ran across Broad Street for a second in front of a car and I was like, maybe I'll get hit. It was like. You ran through the six. You had to run with your woes.

It's such a bummer dude because he for sure just turned around just to fuck with me. Maybe he did actually, I mean he did actually. I mean he I'm not a pussy You could be dangerous. I don't know if you have a weapon. It's not a fair fight But yeah, that's a really That's a real bummer to be chased in real life as an adult to be chased by The open mic scene in Philly got decimated dude The open mic scene in Philly got decimated dude

Every week so would come in just yeah, he got smoked in front of his house St. Louis or whatever. Oh Then someone couldn't answer st. Louis. No No, no you guys Gardini was saying um, oh when we they were trying to get the bag off you guys They're trying to retire early off that bag dude And then it happened the same thing happened in like Indianapolis. We were like walking home at like It's just like super late in there You can like see through we were like coming back to the hotel and you can see through the windows

There's a dude with no shirt in there It's just like Coming outside and then of course It was just a dude with no shirt in there. It's just like, it's just like fucking around coming outside. And then of course, like, Gardein was like, oh yeah, just give him a cigarette. And I was like, no, stop, please. I've been through this. Yeah.

It's just like, dude, you don't know. This is the guy that, but he was actually, he was having a bad day. He was, I think he was just grateful to get a cig. That's nice. He like, I think he was just grateful to get a sig. That's nice. He like Got his ass Teddy's was my favorite

Black eye It was like what happened? He's like I was just walking home and a guy was sitting on my board There was a gargoyle on his front step That's my house he was like, ah! He just launched in my face. And he was like, hey, that's my house. He was blocking the entrance. Yeah. I watched a dude on Market Street. It was a businessman walking across street in this fucking homeless guy.

I was spazzing, full blown sprinting. And then the guy realized halfway across the street that the dude was going to hit him. And he hit one of the girl picks in basketball. He was like, yo! And just got hit and fucking railed on the ground. No, I said girl picks for a long ass time. Dude, that fucking blows.

That's actually I was saying girl picks late in my life. For what? Because I only saw my fucking sisters play basketball. Oh, my God. And actual basketball picks in like seventh grade. Dude, somebody had to tell me like, hold your dick. I was like, oh, that makes sense. Yeah, obviously not your tits.

You're gonna have to protect my tits. It feels good to set a pick like that. Obviously. Yeah, yeah. That's actually a nice move for if a homeless guy is gonna attack, you set a pick. Yeah, anyone, I used to fucking do the straight knee that would fuck people up.

What? If someone's like, if you're setting a pick, you just point the knee out a little bit and just dead leg him right in the fucking leg. That shit hurts. It is the best, though, when you see a homeless attack somebody else. Oh, it's awesome.

You just sit there, watch a guy in a suit, try to sprint. Yeah, not curse. For real zombie chases him. I think, I mean. Ah, fuck. Ah. Ah. Ah.

Ah. That's just the guy like, oh no. Oh, fuck, he's running at me. He like starts off with like. I think I mean No, oh fuck he's running like starts off the same feeling of shitting your pants like that's not happened Sweating immediately you like start walking a little bit faster. Did the guy hit him after he set the pic No, he fell around the dude just kept running try to punch it Yeah, it was crazy. Whoa, dude. He's off the sun. They are fueled by shit. It's like a melted fucking Wawa milkshake on someone's front lawn. Probably something they got off an Amazon package. It's like dogs. They're just getting into shit. The nasty stuff that it makes me want to throw out and people get the like Wawa door dashes melting on their front on

their front step that nerd. Yeah, nerds ropes nerds ropes is crazy. That actually might be. Yeah, that's the that's the one that's the most purchased item. I see fucking dudes get a Wawa. There's yeah, there's something about like gummy candy that is really attractive. Let me end. Crunchy. The best. Yeah. Activate some candy, man. No, not really. I say, I'm not a big sweets guy. No, but the, the, yeah, they just love sugar. Yeah. That's true. The hair on.

Yeah. And they're making a pop-up shop on the bottom of Gerard and front. Karen's candy. No, you know, the heroin, I think it's going to be some sort of shop there, but if you were smart, it would be candy and ice cream and candy. They **** that ****. I mean, there's if you were smart, that thing's getting rated. I mean, they're stocked with candy and ice cream. Yeah, they're gonna have to put they're blowing a portal in the front. The three World Wars. There's gonna be a

thousand of them. I mean, if you're on the streets and you don't care about a fucking thing, the first thing comes around, get some candy. Yeah, obviously, there's no like that's bad for me or any of that shit. I'll eat it melted. I don't give a fuck. They crush melted fucking ice cream. It's been it is tough. How hot it is.

Yes, it's got to see a dude laying on the sidewalk in the sun. You're like, holy shit. I watch a guy on the corner over there.. There's like, you know, not abandoned, but they're just all like fucking closed up and he was just on the front step sleeping hot. It was maybe 96 degrees out, just cooking. And then he got up and went for a walk. Life at your fucking fingertips. You do whatever the fuck you want. Once you settle into that dude, it's probably glorious.

That sucks so bad. You're out here taking chicks on dates and stuff. You do whatever the fuck you want once you settle into that dude. It's probably glorious. Oh that sucks So bad you're out here taking chicks on dates and stuff. You gotta spend like 125 bucks They just go up some chick like I have some heroin left. Can you suck my days again? No problem And then yeah, and then you just it's like this is my sidewalk Tons of trickery then you wake up and so else is crawling in. Yeah, I watched it. You see it. You hear your tent go zzz. And you barely open your eyes and the guy's going, zzz.

It's like sleep paralysis all the time. Constantly. That's what they do. There he is. There's the hat man. The hat man's coming in. That would fucking suck to be schizophrenic. I could just have blaze wave to you. It's like this is my time. I know I need to start wearing like I should start wearing chastis to be honest for real. She's just hold down

albino. Oh yeah. Nice move that. Yeah. Look like your winner. The Trank Brothers like sunglasses. I have those dudes at all. I try to stay away from anything. Kensington. I'm a your winter the Trank brothers like sunglasses I have those dudes at all I try to stay away from anything Kensington. It's too close to home I have a rapist a block away from me. I saw it on citizens. Yeah, dude. You're just the fuck. I saw him too Disgusting human. How'd you know it's on citizens with you know, there's a picture with his phone If you get premium citizens, you can see all the chomos in your area It's on citizens with his picture. There's a picture. If you get premium citizens, you can see all the chomos in your area.

My name is rough. Spee's got a lot of guys. That's where they put them. Yeah. You need to do expected. You need a dog on the roof. No, it still hurts. Obviously, getting attached to. Yeah, problems.

You got to get a new one. Not yet. It's going to help for a while. OK. Freedom is fucking nice. You need get a new one. Not yet. It's gonna help. Freedom is fucking nice. You need a nice cat, bro. Spade's allergic. You're allergic to cats? What if you got like the Dr. Evil cat? Hairless one?

No, you're in Dagobah right now. You're exiled in Dago Bar. It's time to come back though. I haven't heard that name in a long time. You did go to Tatooine. I was telling the dude that has the cat, I was like, yo, did you see Dune? I was like trying to pump him up on Dune. Don't worry about it.

Just turn it up whenever Spade's talking. I mean, dude, if you go there though, there's no windows. Like there's a lot of fucked up shit there. I'm not being a dickhead. Yeah. He said the buildings get to like level four and then it's like teetered off to the side. 25 million people a day. What? Yeah. It's three times the size of New York. Holy fucking shit. And there's no like high rise or anything. It's all just like concrete buildings. No windows. There's no like high rise or anything. It's all just like concrete buildings, no windows. Hot. Oh my God. The center of it's cool.

They got cool, like it's nice, but it was fucked up, dude. I wouldn't want to do that. Sure poverty. Sorry. No, no, that's good. I know, I just got nothing other than, my brother-in-law is a sweet Egyptian man. I mean, the Egyptian people are good.

Yeah. Fucking, this place is fucked up. Hard times, really. I love the story of him. when he just got to America he had no idea what he was doing they gave him a pink fucking jacket a pink jacket they didn't know pink was for girls so he's wearing like a pink fucking puffy jacket he couldn't speak English he went to the wrong bus stop he just went to a They were like, who are you? And he's like, oh, enough is enough. Well, it's crazy. It's crazy.

The big Jack. It's so small. The UK bros are getting leveled right now. How so? Oh, yeah. They're Muslim protest. Oh, really? The Muslims and the UK bros are rioting against each other

because the Muslims stabbed and raped three little girls and then they're only getting probation. And then they made it illegal to post far right memes in the UK so you go to jail for two years if you post some mean memes. That can't be true. Is that actually true? Yeah, it's literally happening right now.

God damn. Those are the wrong bros to get triggered. UK bros are vicious. That's what the one, there was one fucking Welsh lady screaming at the Muslims like, dude, we're tolerant. Wait until we're not tolerant. We do world wars. Yeah.

It's like, oh, literally the least tolerant. Yeah. They've done nothing but commit atrocities throughout history. They're fucking with the wrong ones. Now they're going to fucking, it's, it it's gonna get hot for some fucking election season. I'm waiting for it. My Trump dog isn't gonna make it with JD Vance. He's so weird.

They are weird, dude. Hit with the weirds, that's the tough one. Me and Spade were talking about it. It's just like, you've heard it from every girl. You're in fucking schools, like, oh yeah, you're just being weird. It's like, what the fuck are you talking about? I'm fine. Why are you exactly talking about it? You're in fucking schools like oh yeah, you're just being weird like You talking I'm fine

Just ask you if you listen to 21 questions, you know, it's about Doesn't make sense why it would be weird. I like 50 cent. They also gave him. Did you watch that like interview? He did with the full send guys That's like the only full length. Oh JD Vance. I didn't watch it. They gave him, I mean he's not being the weird accuser. They gave him like a giant arm chair where it's like his, his, he like can, it's the, it's like his, he has to either put his hands here or here, but then he like tries to put the arm rest or just too far out. I don't know what to do.

Yeah, they're crushing him with weird shit. Walls had to get his stomach bumped. From what? Horsey. You guys are. No. I swear to God. Give me the, give me this.

I saw the article. Spill the tea. I saw the article. I just don't trust the dude because he's going hard as shit for trans and kids. Walls is? Yes. Balls walls, he has micropenis.

Micropenis? Okay, you guys can't just tell me the facts. Well he just said JD Vance fucked the couch and that's not true and I'm not necessarily standing up for JD Vance because I don't believe in what he stands for but he made a joke that JD Vance fucked the couch and then they're saying it's a thing around DC that he has micropenis,

which affects 1% of the population, the medical condition, not just small deck, like for real just head. And he's, he's going hard for trans and kids. Oh yeah. Big time. Like what? Like puberty blockers chopping their like lack of tits off on their 12. He just, he just, he's got the face of a pedo and I'm just waiting for it to happen. I'm waiting for the pizza gate related shit on walls to come out and then I'll just be happy. Like I told you guys this guy was fucking people. He just does weird shit.

Spade said it that his fucking, his mouth. He just has the mouth of a fucking weird pederast. What type of mouth is that? Big wide fucking mouth. Oh sick dude. We have small mouths. I got no mouth. Small mouth, you got an underbite Small mouth. You got an underbite?

What? You got an underbite? Can you bite in front of your teeth? What do you mean? Oh. Do you? No, I can't. I can't.

Just an alpha thing. Big jaw. Oh, underbite? Yeah, I can't. Kobe had a good one. Kobe Bryant. RIP. Kobe had a good underbite.

Yeah. A vicious one. Dave, I miss him sometimes. No, my teeth go fucking straight down. Do they really? On top of each other? Yeah, I fucking I'm waiting for my teeth to just grind away to nothing. I fucking grind them every night. I gotta see about his wig. I was a sore. Everyone has fake teeth. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Every single person has the Brits are getting them, which is hilarious. They're notoriously bad. Fucked up. They're all getting porcelain fucking huge ass. I didn't know that happened. Really?

I knew like old, old people at dentures. I didn't know it was fucking everybody. Every chick. They're all just getting totally. Do we were working with Dom RIP? Yeah. Dom, I worked with this guy for like five years probably. And we're talking about something and, uh, going down on girls or something like that and he just goes on they like when you do this

He popped it out the whole time. I had no idea. I had full top-bottom dentures He got them all taken out instead of getting implants because he was like it's too much money. Yeah, it's 30 G's It's so much money to get full implants. But like dude, there's tons of people with no teeth. Yeah No original teeth. It's crazy. Yeah. My uncle got dentures. RIP. Uh, I didn't even know.

I had no idea. But then all of a sudden, like his teeth would cut, his dentures would fall out. Yeah. You have to catch them. Every time he would talk, he'd be like, that's kind of sad. You'd get embarrassed. Yeah. He was crushing wings right when we got into Rapid city and immediately hard yard, sailed his tooth back.

It just back shattered on a thing. No bone, bro. White meat. No, you worshiping there. Oh, dude, that was so bad. So bad. Just two dudes that didn't have it. We thought we were going to make that 23 hour drive. I got to the top of the piano. I was like, wait, why did you think you guys could do that? You got soft hands, brother.

You ain't driving 800 miles a day. You got soft hands, brother. You ain't driving 800 miles a day. You got soft hands, brother. You guys literally got sick. His tooth fell out. You guys could never, it was legendary. Just making mems. Spade fucking crushed mega Guinness the night before. He's like, yo, I got to pull over. I was like, no problem. I just had like a neck pillow and I was looking at spade out of my peripherals and he's on all fours throwing up. I just had like a neck pillow on. I was looking at spade out of my peripherals and he's on all fours throwing up. I didn't know what was going on.

I thought you would just spew like fucking standing up spade hit all fours. He exercises demons on the rez and then kept it trucking. Got all the way to Chicago. Damn pioneers. Yeah. Hitting those drives though. Like I, I could do it. And do it and then it was always the last like 45 minutes But I was just full delusion. It's totally I like sleeping driving through red lights Once you get off the highway you're dead It was like out of the lane and I was like, yo dude you good I was driving with my name Yeah, fine drive with my name. That's all.

I know you can't see. I'm getting fucking scared. I would wake up like two in the morning and you're like gonna drive us off the road. I go, yo. And you're like, what? Whatever it takes. The other sleepy eyes and the classic McCusker sleepy eyes. Whatever it takes, dude. Were you one of those dudes on the grid? Coming home from the Red Pill Expo. Have some respect on GIwardy Greffen, dude. Are you one of those dudes on the grid? Coming home from the red pill expo.

Have some respect on GI word Griffin, please. That was sick. I haven't. It's fucking sick, dude. I mean, we learned a bunch of shit. There was a few. Yeah, there was a few ones that were brutal. There was one chick that went up there and started talking

about shit and literally looked like she was about to cry. It was going so bad. It was fucking insane. I was just like, no way this shit's going to do this. Like who, who here likes multiple streams of income? I like, Oh God, dude, she's like, all you gotta do is invest in the stock markets. Like dude, G Edward Griffin wrote the book creature from Jekyll Island. You're going to hit everyone here with invest in stocks, bro. Read the room,

check. But there was a dude who was talking about, um, what the fuck? He's sitting next to each other now. The Delcon Mansion room. Go. I was there to hear. I tried. We rolled up and we rolled up and we're like, Yeah, we're here for our press passes.

And they had no idea who we were. Yeah. Yeah. We're groove. It's like, yeah, come to the red. Well, yeah, whatever. I get a call from spade. Like, just makes more sense of driving. You don't. Come to the Red Bull. I was like, yeah, whatever. Then I get a call from spade. Like just makes more sense to drive.

And I was like, bro, you don't even got to fucking convince me. Whatever. Saw the country to South Dakota. Well, Philly to St. Louis, then to South Dakota. Yeah. Went through the worst place on earth. Chief's country. I don't want anything to do with Kansas City for as long as I live. That place looks like hell on earth, dude. It's rough. It looks like it fucking sucks. It's like Ozarks.

There's like a few fucking mega rich people and sorry people. Sorry people. But when we were there, we were like, this dude, I forget his fucking name. He was talking about there's venom in like viruses and Botox and shit like that. His name's Brian Artis. Brian Artis, yeah, we were watching that.

And like all these chicks that are getting injections and stuff like that in the Botox, shit like that. His name is Brian artist Brian artist Yeah We're watching that and like all these chicks like that are getting injections and stuff like that the Botox or snake venom that Paralyzes them and then they use it for blood pressure medication because you get bit by a snake your blood pressure drops So they're mass producing fucking venom and just shooting people. Oh, then it's giving wicked amounts of cancer Yeah, that's the shit that like for yeah It's the shit that freezes your face up for Botox. I guess, right? Isn't it like botulism is like Botox and maybe I'm wrong, but I don't know. You're right. I'm about to get heavily involved in plastic surgery to just look, Max, my face, get it fucked up. No, no, it'splant everything. Yeah. Cheekbones. My boy has it.

Eyebrows are going. I'm going to go bald up top and have my eyebrows tattooed on. Yeah, dude. Get the Chola arches. My boy fucking Chad Hanks has Botox. He says he blasts his face. I don't give a fuck. When you look like that, you got to be worried about your looks.

My boy's an electrician gets it too. That's just crazy. Being an electrician. He looks like he's got Botox. Hire him to water the house. Yeah. When you look like that do you gotta be worried about it looks my boys and like Trish and gets it to it That's just crazy What the fuck are you doing bro, he goes I have fucking wrinkles I gotta get rid of once again, dude You're fucking like you're getting old. That's okay like a 35 year old electric Handsome Squidward came to wire my Handsome Squidward came to wire my License insured beast

Yeah, he got that he got laser hair on his arms up to his like so he can wear a tank top and not have Hairy arms you got laser hair laser hair on his arms and he like argues with me like it makes sense It's like dude, that's just gay. So it's not gay dude. Like I, I don't want to fucking shave it off. I was like, don't shave it. You got it. Is he a hairy man? He's not that hairy. And he got it. He got it. It started with his widow's peak.

He had a widow's peak and he goes, I don't want to get a haircut all the time, so I'll just get my widow's peak removed. And he still gets a haircut every two days. I saw the hairiest, were you with me? I saw the hairiest gay guy on earth. Do you remember that? It's called a bear.

Bro, this, you've never seen anything like it. He was wearing like Daisy Dukes. Oh. Was this in Center City? From his ankles to definitely the back of his head. But the hairiest fucking ass you've ever seen, dude. His ass was hanging out? I mean, it was definitely underneath his thighs,

the back of his legs. It looked like your hair. Yeah. It looked like curly hair. Yeah, it was definitely underneath his thighs, the back of his legs, it looked like your hair. Yeah. Like it looked like curly hair. Yeah, it was like dark. You could grab his hair. It's a mane. Yeah.

It was fucked up. He was so hairy, he looked like blurry. You know what I mean? Yeah, bad res. Yeah. Yeah, I saw when I was working on Van Pelt Street, a building caught fire, and there was this dude who walked his dog every day,

and he was just straight up gay and had a fucking choker that just said pig. And like, do that, like, do you know what they do? Sexual pigs. I've heard about the jizz in the armpit. Yeah, dude cornered me that was dropping off a fucking machine for my dad. It's like, I'm actually gay.

I was like, cool. It's like, yeah, I was a pig. I was like, all right. And then he started like explaining it. Like you'll go to a truck stop, get jizzed in your armpits, not shower, and then hit another 700 miles. Think about it. I'm discussing. You already feel just driving. Then you have dry jizz come on. That's a different level of horny. That's not, yeah, it's a new level.

That's five G's. Yeah, that might be five G on those boys. That or the fucking water turned him gay. I just couldn't even imagine. That must just be what dudes do when they get together. It's like you're gay. It's like, what else can we do? Just my arm.

All right, I'll do it. You won't. Fucking right. I will. Just guys growing up. Disgusting. I'll do it. You won't fucking right. I will just guys growing up Disgusting that's very gross That shit fuck like that you think about that stuff all the time. Well, I mean I got a long drive coming up You just do this for me

quick thing That must be awesome though. If you are gay and you're a truck driver What just like everywhere you go, everyone's trying to fuck. Like imagine everywhere you drove, there was just chicks like, come on, come on me please. Like, fuck yeah. Yeah. They go to the next one. Obviously, you know, it's just dudes. Yeah. They're going to keep quiet. No hassles. There's no, everyone just happened to bro down a load of guys. Armpit is Molly picture on the Sinclair come and go literally that's what they call it Gandolfini rest stop. Yeah. Fuck dude. That's

awesome. I think they tore it down and they're rebuilding. We need the Trump better get on the Gandolfini. What do you talk? Oh, we need that. Rename the up in Scranton. I mean, it's better up past Grant grant there's Joe Biden highway They renamed it after I feel it all Feeney service area. Whoa, we're still going Montbell, New Jersey. Let's get it Why is the chief why is the cheesequake rest area closed? That's someone's haunt dude why the fuck did they close my cheesequake Oh Brothers

What do you what else is going on? What else are you thinking about? Nothing really honestly yeah Here's I forgot to mention this yesterday. I was in maybe just two days ago I was in like a grocery store in West Philly by my house It's like a black it came to me yes, yeah you ever see Harry Potter I was like, yeah I know you're about to say he's like turned around his girlfriend is running. He's like yo, it's Malfoy Just not abused. You're Malfoy looking at his motherfucker. Yeah, it's like getting face tats or something.

I was like, thanks, man. Slytherin rules. I just finished all the Harry Potter's not too long ago. Watch them all in succession. It was fucking awesome. You're Hufflepuff, bro. Hufflepuff. Gryffindor.

You're Gryffindor? I'm Gryffindor. What do you think Spud is? Spud? He's Gryffindor through and through. He's the boy who lived. Spade is Paul time. That's a fucked up documentary. Oh, dude, did you see that?

No. What? Fucking Harry Potter stunt double. It was in the fucking thick of it. Everything was sick. He does a stunt and breaks his neck paralyzed at like the height of Harry Potter. I don't know what it was like some fucking crazy. It was, it was crazy. Like he's talking the whole time.

He's just fucking wheelchair it up, like living life now, but like in the fucking top of Harry Potter, they're all chilling, going out and stuff. He was fucking on top of the world and they just get like some cable pulled too hard and didn't stop broke his fucking spine or some shit. Holy shit. The boy who lived. That's terrible. Obviously. Then they just get like some cable pulled too hard and didn't stop broke his fucking spine or some shit The boy who lived Obviously, I also watched all the Lord of the Rings in succession spades favorite fucking movie. That's good. You gotta get on Star Wars, bro I watched new hope I watched the one with George our banks in theaters when I was like fucking so

That was fun. I forget, MTV was firing it up. They were promoting it. They played the lightsaber battle with ball with the ball in the background. Oh. Never been more hyped as a kid. Yeah, before I was going to sick as a kid. I was down the beach and I was like fucking

going to the arcade and shit. They were going to go see a movie. And then they went underwater with those big ass fish. Like there's always bigger fish in the sea. Always sat with me. For the rest of my life, there's always bigger fish in the sea always sat with me the rest of my life there is always bigger fish in the sea that's something you got to take with you i mean what can you do your suffering has ended we're at an hour and three minutes there's no suffering i had such

a pleasant time today in the blue room it's nice in here also man we need Matthew yeah right I need Matthew fired he's got I guarantee he's got some new bullshit on right now oh I text I sent Matt he Matt's mentioned Brian Pumper oh Pumper just got a that's exactly what I said Pumper the fucking black porn star Brian Pumper he just got a used to egg people and people saw Pumper, the fucking black porn star. Brian Pumper. God damn it. He just got egged. He used to egg people and people saw Pumper on the street egged his ass.

He was egging? He was throwing eggs at strangers. Yeah, he would throw eggs at people. And Pumper got egged. Pumper got pumped. He lived by the egg. He died by the egg. So you got a bunch of gang members.

Yokes on him. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Uh, you're gonna whiz? Yeah. All right. We should probably, we should probably gonna wish? Yeah. Alright. We should probably, uh, we should probably wrap it. Yeah.

Yeah. We did what we could. Okay. Yeah.