Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast - Ep 528 - Magic Burrito (feat. Nate Jackson)

Episode Date: November 12, 2024

Support the D.A.W.G.Z. @ patreon.com/MSsecretpod Support Nate @ https://www.natejacksoncomedy.com/ Go See Matt Live @ mattmccusker.com/dates Go See Shane Live @ shanemgillis.com Get Merch @ mssecretpodcast.com/merch yo0o0o0o0o. We hope you're all having a good start to your week. Cusky had the bro Nate Jackson in Austin HQ for this week's cast. Go check Nate out on the road or check out his club in Tacoma. Please enjoy. God Bless. ps a little patreon treat may be coming out soon  Download the PrizePicks app or visit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/DRENCHED today and use code Drenched to get $50 instantly after you play your first $5 lineup Try BlueChew FREE when you use our promo code DRENCHED at checkout - just pay $5 shipping. That’s bluechew.com/, promo code DRENCHED to receive your first month FREE. Upgrade your wardrobe and get up to 25% OFF @trueclassic at https://trueclassictees.com/DRENCHED! #trueclassicpod The Mountain is calling, you should answer #DoTheDew #MTNDEW Shop now @ https://lets.shop/2141/dothedew

Oh hell yeah, Nate Jackson dude. Making it easy for me bro, you got the name tag on? Yeah. God damn dude. It's awesome. Right up top. You showed up to work bro. Just a little narcissistic jacket.

My bad. Dude so I saw your clip and I think you took it down with the freaky ass little boy. I don't know, I think it's up. Is it up? I couldn't find it. I was trying to show my wife. The one that's like air eating? Yeah, the kids like licking. He just keeps licking that. Yeah So that's still up. I thought it was down because after I watched it I was like, oh, maybe he has like a like a tick or something. No, he didn't have a tick. What was he doing?

He was just a badass little kid that saw himself on the screen and he said I would have did if I was a kid exact same thing I'm like Literally Yeah, I remember he was with like an older. I guess it was his parents or grandparents. Yeah, and he was just Eating it was just like he focused in you're talking to I think his Grandfather and he just this little kid started just going Yeah, that's pretty funny though either way I'm telling you. No, I'm doing like two, three. Oh, so it got buried. It's right there. The freaky ass little boy.

The young and freaky. The young and freaky, that's what it was. For sure, it's right there. People are like, they had somebody just randomly decided that he had Tourette's and I was like, he super did it. And somebody wrote me, they were like, hey, all clips associated with Keaton are perfectly fine to post. And I was like, but who's Keaton?

They're like, the little boy. Freaky ass little boy. They had to report it. I was like, I'm not going to do that. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it.

I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. And somebody wrote me, they were like, hey, all clips associated with Keaton are perfectly fine to post. And I was like, but who's Keaton? They're like, the little boy. Freaky ass little boy.

They had to remind me. And I was like, oh, okay, bet. Oh, so they got the okay. They wrote me, it was like, just so you know, it's okay to use the post. Totally fine. Yeah, I watched it, he was doing those little faces, but nah, man.

That's what I thought, I thought he genuinely did have like a tic. Right, but have you also seen every other little black kid that sees himself on a screen? He got one response and he was like oh here we go Yeah, wigging out true. I'm dude. Look he was there You know he was there and he was licking the air and it did it did like change Because it was I was watching like what the fuck is this kid doing? He was just licking the air and then once you start talking about him. He started like he was killing going

That's what was happening. He was murdering Every time I had just any little gap or a pause of me taking a breath. He was like let me feel that space And I'm not looking at the screen. I just see the I see the explosion I'm like what am I missing I turn around and there he is with I'm like, oh hell no. Yeah He was young too, man. He was like five. I don't know how white people do that Yeah, when they bring a five-year-old out, it's like the casino. You see the casino literally probably to the origin story of comic from 25 True

Well, thanks for coming, bro. No, man, thank you for having me. Appreciate you for coming here. You're a world- I wanted to do this real bad. Really? I've been on the road for hella days. I flew, I could have been home right now. I know, dude. I really appreciate that.

I left and I came back because I wanted, I'm here for this. I didn't think, yeah, I was like, when you were like going- Other people are like, hey, I'm in Austin for something else and if I swing through no I flew my ass here From a gig to be here to do that. I wanted to do this. I appreciate a big deal Thank you. I'm I'm so I feel blessed to be here. Yeah, dude. We're fucking forging a connection I feel fucking blesses. I'm all blessed fuck right now. Yeah, I'm my fucking ass is wet. I'm just gonna go the other way See what happens See my fucking ass is wet. I'm just gonna go the other way By the way, are you in that you know we're just jumping in or how freaky would you say you are? I don't look I don't give a shit

Spectrum to freakiness right I'm saying how freaky I mean it's really is gay is the end of it You just get gay at the end that's gay is the freakiest. Yeah, but isn't that that's a new spectrum though, right? Yeah, I mean it's the tip of evolution straight from like let's say one to ten and when you hit 10.1 now you're gay. It's like the evolution moves in a spiral It just jumps to a whole but there's another spectrum again. What's when they hit 10.1 on the gay scale Where do they go? I think it's when you start like eating women and stuff like eating their legs I think once you're done. Yes Depends where you it's like a bullet depends what you do with it a bullet

You could just give yeah like a bullet by themselves or like nothing it just depends are you shooting somebody? You know yeah, right so it's like so I think baby oil depends what you're doing if you throw it as hard as you can You're still not gonna do anything the bullet you're saying yeah exactly it depends on it depends on your intention so baby oil Again, you can give you what else would you throw as hard as you can rock? Okay? That's your something. I like your dick or something, but I do throw that as hard as I can to little effect usually I'm not a fat usually. Okay. So straight freaky freaky freaky freaky. Watch out.

You don't want to fall. Yeah, exactly. But you can't get back down into the freak. You can't. Once you go over. People are doing it though. Milo Yiannopoulos was like a famous gay guy. He's not gay anymore.

What little Nas X claims he's not gay anymore. You can't. He sucked the devil's dick. He did it. You can't. You can't un-gay. I didn't. I I don't think you can either but these guys are doing it and they're making millions Dabbled in gay. No, you can't Yeah, you can't you can't go back but you're but why guys kind of really play with that like a lot Yeah, we're gay definitely

For sure And white guys we got your dick, like you guys are wild. We have fun with you. You guys are wild. I will say, and this is actually, this could be debatable, but I feel like when black guys do become gay, they like really quantum leap into like very gay.

Does that make sense? I don't know. I think everyone's telling the same black auntie. That's been my experience Why is a gay person from Austin Seattle LA Chicago? Germany why they all sound like yes beats. Why do they all sound like a white guys do it? They'd like jump in on it to every flight. Yeah, dude. Yes, that's true sugar. Can I get you something to drink sugar? Yeah Chad your 29 year old white guy.

Why are you talking to me? What is going on? What is going on? I think they think just from being gay, they get to just take the whole menu and be like, I'll be a black lady too. I'm gay, I'm fucking. Right, but nobody's a gay old white auntie.

True. Do you understand what I'm saying? Yeah. Like when they want the razzle dazzle, they go black auntie. They do. Yeah, I can't eat they do Yeah, they don't just like sit at like a kitchen table quietly smoking a cigarette and it all sound like Jennifer Lewis. I Don't know why that's been a recent development No, it hasn't really they've been as long as I know really channeling the same voice

Same auntie same snaps. Yes. Yeah, why, they really, I don't know, dude. You're from Wisconsin. Yeah. You guys don't snap? Yeah, that's. What, you're calling cattle or something? Yeah, that's, they need to hear about that. They need to stop that.

If I see that again, if I see that happening, I'm gonna be like, I'm not bragging or whatever, my wife's black, it's no big deal, but she'll get those guys fired up on the airline. Huge deal. It's huge. It's huge. My wife my wife not like bragging over my wife's black somebody deal, but like she'll get those guys fired up on the airline My wife's black no big deal moving on her hands aren't though the inside so that's the part Gay white guys in the airplane. Yeah, yeah, and they just like she turns them up Exactly exactly you're just sitting there like oh my god, she fires them up they feed off each other

But I think what are you doing while that's happening far? I just have my headphones on looking down and I tell her I'm like, you know, stop getting the gays fired up I mean you an entire Pokemon having an evolution in front of you. You're not gonna watch that What do you mean? I tell her, I'm like, dude, you're getting these guys fired up. You don't wanna see that? Have you been watching Pokemon? That's a Jigglypuff song, that's a deep cut. Yeah. I mean, I got no stuff.

I'm watching Pokemon again right now with my kids. Yeah, it's so good, dude. I'm watching it with my kids. They need to do live action. You mean like the live action movie? I know they have like the Pikachu movie where it's like an old dude's voice But I mean like why not the battles and stuff? Dude, I would love that. Pokemon it holds up. I'm rewatching it And I'm like the show I was right the show. You played the game? Yeah played on Gameboy

No the one where like you have to catch them in real life on iPhones where people just like in random fields where people Were getting hit by trains and shit. I think so, dude They also said that was like a spy app They were like using that to like see everyone's location because if you had millions of people playing that you can be sweet and zoom In anywhere in the country. What do you do with that information? Be Chinese with it. I don't know He thinks he has a chowaza. Right. If we release the chowaza, we get Sabal at once. I don't know, man. I guess to like...

What is the point? I don't know. That's kind of evasive. That's why I didn't understand about the TikTok stuff either. I'm like, the fuck do they want to know about us? That we can do this shit all day? What? Yeah, they tell Xiao Ping, they're like, they're doing a Soulja a soldier boy right our rich aren't on tick-tock What do you want? I wonder how much of us have them?

I guess that gives them ability because that would be almost just too much if you have millions of people and you're trying to Like yeah, it'd be just a bunch of people like oh So yeah, I guess you're right. I kind of uh, I don't know what they do with that Send you an email. Yeah, or try to like just see what you're up to but yeah, you're just be catching Pokemon So then I don't get it That's a good point because I hear about that all the time because they say we have more surveillance here in America with ring doorbells and all the private stuff than the whole Chinese government, but again really yeah, they're saying but it's all just privatized It was all through all the ring doorbells and stuff

Yeah, I bet if you had access to all of them you. Through all the ring doorbells and stuff. That's interesting. Yeah, I bet if you had access to all of them, you could go straight. Which people could do that. And that could be like you just set it up to where it's like. Yeah, I'd die. You don't, yeah, exactly. You don't watch it all at once,

but if it's like, hey, I need to see right here, right now, you can go through a bunch of metadata and like, okay, we have all these phones in that area. That's enemy of the state. Matter of fact, I saw when they tracked the, they tracked like four days of the guys that killed young Dolph before. They just went back and they had him for like four days.

Like this is what he was wearing. Kid was on the same outfit for like three days. Really? Yeah. Oh yeah, all the cities now too. But they use all the ring cameras, like just tracking every move. Like they would walk out a frame

and then a new camera would pick them up. Like they had them tracked. Yeah dude. And then cities have their own grid. So between the city's grid and the ring doorbells, it's like, you're done. What's that show where they let people try to get away now? You seen that?

No, it was like, what do you mean? They give you like 24 hours, like run. What? Yeah. And you gotta like, I always wanted to do that. If you can stay away, you get like a million bucks. From like the police or like? Any, like the point of the show is that they're gonna look for you.

They're gonna get you. And so you think of the place that no one will ever find you and they're like, come out. What? Yeah, we saw you on a ring camera. So you can like just ditch your phone, ditch everything and just hide. Yeah, but then you walk by somebody else and you're in the background of a FaceTime video and they got your face or... Oh, Jesus.

You run a red light and they're like, oh, he's going south on. So they could just hit up all your loved ones and investigate you basically and be like, yo, where is this place? Here's his two likeliest places. But it's a TV show, like they've made it, people are like, it's like this is Dave, he's a wilderness expert, he's been off grid

for 95 days, the longest known to man. Can he evade for 24 hours? Six minutes and they're like Dave get your ass out the truck and they get him What channels that on it sounds awesome, I don't know I can't even find that I always wanted to do because everyone does like the 5k's and 3k's I want to do a running I always wanted to do because everyone does like the 5k's and 3k's I want to do it running Oh, yeah a running race where you could against like the police department or that you could like stimulate like live-action chases where it's like All right, I'm gonna we're both gonna run out of this deli You got to catch me and I'm gonna try to evade the police they got that but it's it's on ESPN

It's called tag. I've seen that before the first the same shit Yeah, well, that's like, you know, a course. I want like uniformed police officers. I want to like run out of a bank and see if they could catch me. Well, you don't got to wait to do that. I could do it, yeah. Yeah. I'm not gonna be a part of that, but you definitely.

And yours, actually yours won't even, it won't even be mortal or anything. You think they would let me go? I mean, as long as they don't know you got a black wife, you're good. True, yeah. Oh my, here's the plot twist Plot twist used to be a cop see exactly. Yeah, I have a little thing

It says officers boyfriend as we were married that lease and true But yeah, I always wanted to see if I could actually like I mean I ran away when I was little like, you know That was like you can go the woods and they were they were beat but like okay What if it wasn't actual cops or what if it was little, you can go to the woods and they were beat. Okay, what if it wasn't actual cops? What if you just put black shirts on some friends and you're like, alright, this is what we're going to find out today. That's the tag game, and that game's cool too. No, but it's used all of downtown.

It's like, you start outside of the door of this joint, and how far of a lead do you want? Yeah, I want like 10 feet. I think that's hella. Think that's too far? No, like, yeah. People, what if you had a block lead? You're already gone.

Yeah, but I want like the whole city group. I guess that's kind of a waste of the city's resources. This is why they get dogs. Yeah, true. Oh yeah, they can drop a dog on you. Yeah. Yeah, I don't want that. So no canines. No canines, Okay. No horses

Horses are fine. So you you got a horse too. No, they have a horse and you're on feet Yeah, you're you're caught right the water hit the water. They're fucked what water in downtown Drown myself in the river My family gets a million dollars. That would be cool if you were in that show and you just jumped off a cliff and your family never find you. What would you call the show? No, I'm saying that show you're talking about where you if they don't find you get a million bucks. Just kill yourself. What would you? So you just jump off of a cliff and die. But they're still gonna find you like this idiot killed himself. Yeah, you'd have to like self emulate you have to burn yourself You have to completely get rid of yourself. You'd have to completely get rid of yourself. You'd have to literally close yourself in a barrel of acid Your family gets a million bucks And your life insurance and your life insurance and they can sue the show and be like yo you fucking he's gone forever Yeah, he hid so goddamn good. He's gone. I'm sure they vet the people

Yeah, true make sure they vet the people. Yeah, true. Make sure they're not gonna kill themselves. Yeah. You could, this could be to catch a predator. How so? Same name. What do you mean?

Yeah, that'd be funny if they catch- It's just plot twist, you're like, it's not actual sexual predators. This guy's gonna be a predator, and we're gonna be the chasers. And then you just go. Yeah. I don't know what you're saying though. So why would they be the, they would be the predators, you'd be the predateders and then you just go yeah I don't know what you're saying though, so how why would they be the pre they'd be the predators

You'd be there, but it's just a good name like people would want to watch that true or if they do catch you Then they get to you know they do what? We're special they get to predate on you and we're right back. Yeah, true It's a pretty donny and we're right back. Yeah It'd be so funny though to have that primetime like almost like the great American chase channel Like everyone's grandmoms watching it me like shit I mean as far as ads go That was there for an ad I'm pumped drink I should dilated my eyes You're not allowed to mention extreme sports in their ads either for some reason. What the fuck that's like your guys's thing

Who guys's Mountain Dew? Mountain Dew. You know when you say that. Mountain Dew and ours. So Mountain Dew is Mountain Dew. I thought you were talking about me and your wife. So Mountain Dew's thing. Why would you say that? She was an officer, dude.

She's black now. She was blue before. I get what you're saying. She chose. So Mountain Dew, you can't say Extreme Sports? They say that. I don't care. It's up to them, that's their problem. That's crazy.

Yeah, they fucking sponsored Extreme Sports for years. My whole life, literally it's like, you chug one of those and then hit a motorbike or skateboard or a half-pipe. They're like, you know what, don't do that now. That's Red Bull. They had too many people just trying to do backflips on their bikes and they're like,

all right, we gotta drop this. Well, Red Bull's going hard. They got people Doing backflips off of hot air balloons and shit true Yeah, Red Bulls nothing. You're surprised. They haven't been sued yet Red Bulls definitely been somebody Died drinking Panera's caffeinated iced tea no, but I mean like from somebody jumping off some shit expecting it to give him wings Yeah Yeah, risky campaign dude. I guarantee Red Bulls been sued five million times. Yeah. Yeah, dude people have heart attacks From drinking it. Yeah, what yeah, dude, if you drink too many there's people who have like genuinely no understanding about like

Tori what's in anything? I'll just drink like I think people who drink like five rock stars a day back back to back Yeah during the day like it like fucks up your kidneys and shit. Thank God Mountain Dew doesn't do that to you. It's organic Thank God Mountain Dew doesn't do that. Yeah Red Bull. Okay, 13 mil. It's nothing, bro What's that say throughout the situation rebel insisted marketing tactics were honest and clear, rejecting any deceitful practices. However, the lawsuit was settled in 2015 when Red Bull paid customers $13 million, but maintained their marketing was not dishonest. You can't see any of that.

Oh, because he said for not, you guys see any of that glare. I just ripped right through it. Nah, dude, I didn't see it until you mentioned it. I think there's an angle where there's like a glare. No, now that you mentioned it, now all I can see is you. So the guy sued Red Bull for not growing wings and one damn Yeah, you can't do that twice yeah, you can't fuck around he won 13 million for just exploiting their thing Yep, that's like the dude to like measure cereal and then we get Pepsi and be like we haven't fought anything young yeah

We get Pepsi and be like we haven't fought anything young. Yeah We think we're older now I do like the coca-cola commercials when it's just like beautiful people just like dancing on a rooftop and it's like dude They're not slamming coca-cola's bro The oh, yeah, you know what I mean? This is like a bunch of models just chugging coca-cola's and do it or like or like gorgeous athletes and Models eating McRibs. Yeah in traffic. Nothing spills. Yeah, you don't see that at all. Not in real life I stopped eating behind the wheel. I got in a small accident one time. What were you driving? I was driving like a just a minivan you were driving minivan. Yeah, so I think it's like my friends

It's like a Astro or one of those things like a safari. Okay, and what were you eating? tacos That's pretty aggressive for driving. It was it was too much I did I did have a little white wine to beforehand so you were drinking and driving in tacos I think I drank before and I took who do you think you don't know? I don't remember I don't think I was drinking white wine. I'm driving out. No, no, no, I was like barely buzzing. That was the problem But if I was drunk, I would be like full on driving. Were you drive out? No, no, no, I was like barely buzzing, that was the problem. But if I was drunk, I wouldn't pay attention. So you were like full on driving,

head sideways, eating a taco. I was at a red light eating, I just didn't realize I let go of the brake. I let go of the brake at the red light. You just rolled forward into traffic? Rolled forward, bonked into a city car. It was like a city, like an LNI inspector, just bonked him.

It was so light, but they came out and tried to be like. They were in the car? Yeah, it was at a red light. They got out the car, and they're like they try to be like what the other I mean they were fuck they were within their right to be like hey what the fuck was that about fucking want to talk? Oh, yeah, I just I put that down. I was like dude. I I don't know what the hell happened, and they're They were like we're gonna call the cops. I'm like come on man. Don't do that. That's crazy You guys don't have any damage, and then they're just like you know it's got out of it So so now you don't eat and drive. No stop. This is a real story

Yes I just let go of the brake and just totally blame that on the brakes goddamn brakes went out I sure that but I have good I've had I've had people hit my car multiple times in a similar situation I was like whatever man. We're fine. Yeah, if it doesn't leave a mark exactly or if it's fingernail polish big So what that's what I'm saying? I don't want to do with that paperwork anyway That's what I'm saying I was like so I let two people off the hook and I think it just kind of I had a lady Fucking nail my car, but it was like a Ford Contour

And I do they had that like a steel butter go she knows your car The car was such a piece of shit And I also her car yours mine mine was it was like a different color panel all that stuff And I also had a guy at a wedding It was a car was like such a piece of shit but the guy backed in and like crunched my door in there and I fully went after his ass and I got like I Got more than the car was worth dang and he was really pissed off about it And then I felt kind of bad about that because I did definitely just pocket all that money didn't fix the car and then

Didn't fix the car and then uh He only he wanted to go through his insurance, so he caught me a personal check for like oh my god And I had he was like kind of you know He was like kind of like evading me a little bit so I had to like call him up And I like what I was outside his office his office I'm like bro. I need to get my car fixed like you got a fork He was like I know you're not fixing this fucking car And I was like bro. I'm fixing it right now I didn't do that yeah, cuz I wasn't in the car He I were at like a wedding and he backed into the car

He did fuck my door up, but after the wedding too. Yeah, he's been having a little white wine tacos himself He was part of the family. It was like in-law other side You know you know the two sides come together the wedding so yes, it wasn't blood if it was blood I would've let it slide, but I don't know this crap. I don't know this fucking guy. And it was a long time ago. Now I, you know.

I'm a better person now, but back then I was hungry for that paper money. I was like, give me my 1700 bro. Amazing, yeah I let somebody go too one time, I got bumped, it wasn't bad, but I couldn't understand him, so I was like, fuck this. Yeah, I had an old Chinese guy hit me one time He was and I and I took I got all the way to Spanish 3 in school and lived in LA for 12 years

And this guy was I couldn't understand, but I knew it was Spanish based Yeah, you could have really wrecked his life to if you're like now the cops coming, bro Yeah, yeah, you could have called ice Potentially potentially Potentially. That would suck to have to go back to Honduras over a fender bender. I wonder if it was Honduran. Yeah, I mean, I'm just guessing. That would fucking suck though.

This is a prime away from his children and his wife. That's what I'm saying. It's like you have a family of a job, you're living the American dream, and then it's like, no, dude, you scratched my paint. The fuck you doing eating tacos in traffic? Yeah, you gotta go fucking fast. It's like't eat tacos in traffic? Yeah, you gotta go fucking It's a taco You had an old uh Old Asian guy bought me one time really and dude it was like we were like

Nectar net we're just like in like gridlock traffic, and he just somehow and I'm like watching driving Yes, and I was like there's no way he's trying He just tried to get into my lane and hit my car, and I was like dude I just never saw you we had nowhere to go Oh, he did that thing where he expects you to stop and let him in do we were bare It was like it was I laugh I started laughing. Did you were you parked the whole time like still we were pretty still from what? I remember I think we stopped, but did you inch forward at all no wasn't one of those because I always I let people go I'm not gonna be like no he like came. I didn't even see him. He was was behind me He just came from behind yes, I think I was like oh, I'm sorry yeah

No, dude the double entendres no did he do that I got hit by an old Asian dude him From the back that was all the whole thing that would be crazy I think I just saw my mirror coming and I was like what the fuck is this guy doing all of a sudden? He was just donk and I was like bro. He's like he was so funny though when he came out He was just like an old Asian guy. It was like he got alerted He had the exclamation mark above his head And it was I was like dude. You're too funny. You gotta go. I can't I can't hold this against you This is so fun get his name. No, I was he was

Couldn't speak any English and he kept being like oh not so bad I'm so whatever he was trying to say and I was like bro. You're you're hilarious. Yes. Go you guys are so fucking funny That's amazing. Yeah, so that's why I got that's why I got blessed by the L&I guys from the city when I I you know They could have got me they're tied in with the whole so you say it's karma you believe in karma big time So you let all those other people off so then when you Slow rolled into the L&I guys and they let you off you're like, thank god. It's cuz of all the people I let off That's just how I roll. I wasn't even thinking about the future rewards I was like, I'm I was always I've always fantasized

Lightly about like someone like fucking like nailing my car or something and me just being like cool as fuck I mean like dude. I don't even care about their L&I Yeah, they're like just went to work and put in a claim It's a city That's by the way, that's what cops are all after Yeah, all trying to get put on disability. Yeah, like oh my god. It's crazy I've never met instruction was bad cops are like they all want to go on this I mean I shouldn't say all but I would say like ninety nine point six percent point six is so specific

I mean, yeah, I'm leaving a couple of people just go go 99.9. They just go all the way. 0.6. 99.9. Like you literally left a 3.3 percent for error. Like a poll. 0.4, bro. Yeah. Well, I took from the 0.99. So, how do they get disability? Like they're chasing someone and twisting an ankle. So, they can't, a cop can't sue the city per se, but yes, if they get hurt, they can go on like just basically disability and the city per se, but yes, if they get hurt, they can go on like just basically disability, and the city will cover them. So if you get hurt, you can't sue the city and get a million bucks. But if you can prove that you're hurt because of the job,

you'll just carry cop benefits for the rest of your life and you can just chill. Really? So like, oh, I can't sleep and my feet hurt 100%? Yeah, but what they will do is if you're not hurt enough, they will put you on desk duty. So if you can prove that like if you sit down at a desk it still hurts your back like if you're like I can't sleep or like you go to desk duty

But if you like get fucked up, and you're like dude sitting all day doing paperwork so I'm not gonna work Yeah, though yeah, and these are locking up my back is they'll fight you on it, but if you can prove it They're like all right, and you just have you're done They like same people to follow you like see you probably you probably have the same ball like motherfucker Yeah, I knew a dude who lost like a couple hundred grand playing a goalie in street hockey when he had a case I knew a guy took pictures of him just fucking playing street. His lawyer was like Yeah, my I knew a guy I was in as a guy named mr. Terry and mr. Terry We would put his head down like that and he would act like he had a club foot and walk

Mr. Terry had an L&I claim open he won but it was a trip to see him be like, all right I'm about to head out damn and then do it when he leaves What was that movie where the guy at the very end was like limp in he starts walking or there was a fucking I have No idea. There's I think so., is that it that's a real thing I'm just talking about mr.. Terry, but there's a movie work Cuz I we I used to work with a guy who fucked his foot up And he would limp and we'd all laugh like dude I guarantee on Friday He just fucking soon as he gets to his car is a guy all right wow is he like he's saying he limped and he

I think he got like yeah, they fucked his foot up like forever and he got like 100 grand, I think. I think there's like prices, like if you lose a finger, that's like 16,000 bucks. That's it? Yeah, I mean, you would think so for a finger, but yeah, it's not like, you don't get like 100 Gs for a finger.

I could be wrong, but I think there's like- It must be different based on the finger, like you lose a thumb, they gotta break your wrist. You're fucked, yeah. You're not even a human no more lose a thumb true. That's they gotta break your fucked Yeah, I don't even know more. That's just I could be wrong about that But I think there is like a for real like value thing on like your body parts for like if you lose in that work Is there value? Yeah, I think a pinkies like pinky you get like what do you think is the most expensive body part a private?

Yeah, if you lose your dong you're dude I can't even reproduce that's gotta be a milli or they might they might be like like a deli counter like they have like What's your meat? There is the value of body parts. Yeah There we go arm 124 yo, let's go Stitching arm It's got a blur on it. Yeah, so assembly line worker loses a finger might receive 18 G's. I'm pretty close Yeah, so assembly line worker loses a finger might receive 18 G's. I'm pretty close Accidental death and dismembered insurance policy might be five thousand. What the fuck I'd be pissed if someone paid me five grand for my life

Your arm would be 124 there we go I Yeah, so your pinky Thumb you do get more you're absolutely right 35 but 35 bro. That's not enough to never be able to grip again. Yeah, I mean, a thumb, your eye's worth more than your thumb, how? Because you can't see. Foot's 82, yep. Big toe.

You can't even balance without a big toe. Yeah, that's, yeah dude, that's what you get. New York Workers' Compensation Board. They figured out your body parts in a dollar amount. I don't know how. The whole man is a hundred thousand? Yeah, a hundred G's for a leg. One fifteen for a leg? That's not enough.

Why is your arm worth more than your leg? I guess it's easier to kind of have like a peg leg, I guess. Why is an arm worth more than a leg? I guess, you know, you use your arms more, but if you're your leg you can just stand on whatever. It doesn't even fucking matter. Get a kickstand. It's fucking... Arms should be at the top for sure Yeah

Eyes nice. I wouldn't can't even hug anymore. That's true. Yeah I was gonna push up mash yourself against ladies tits and big what I'm being nice Can't drive a manual Yeah, you can't do shit really but with a leg you can you just gotta get real busy. Yeah, legging you just peg it up you'll be alright. But yeah that's yeah now you know. No ear? Like what's an ear if you lose your ear? But I think that this is a trouble working for yourself yeah losing an ear is I don't think they even include that. But if you work for yourself and you lose your hand you're just fucked. This is amazing there's no dick

nothing on there like I need more body parts dicks probably like they keep that behind the glass That's like reserved information. They don't want people known That's got a dick's gotta be if you get your ass millions of dollars Your ass yeah, if you blew your ass the ass they'd be like here's 80 grand Shut the fuck up you think so better asses worth like 6,000 Need it I fucking blew my ass up at the factory. They're like, dude, shut the fuck up.

Can you type in how much is an ass worth? I think something else is gonna come out. It's gotta be. True. What's an ass worth right now? What is ass worth right now? Shit. Depends on if it's from a prostitute girlfriend or a wife a wife half

Yeah, so I don't think you can I don't think you can like really Well I said $20 is $20 Cause they can also if you're talking about losing a cheek They can put a pop a cheek on that's nothing man You can mix and match with that Yeah? Yeah if you like someone somehow like again that'd be a crazy accident to cut your ass off That would be nasty I feel like more people smear it off If you like someone somehow like again, that'd be a crazy accident to cut your ass off

I feel like more people Smear it off. What do you mean like a motorcycle accident something big time? Well, they just like a pencil eraser the word mailman. They got that whole window open man If you fall out you just scrape your ass on There's just a little smudge on the ground and yeah disability. Yeah true thousand dollars Yeah, if you lose your ass, you know again, it's like if you the problem is if you somehow destroy your asshole at work That's where the big bucks come in you get the hole they gotta pay you That's what they get but they got the surgery where they just snip some and bring some new hole down true Yeah, they pulled down. Yeah, they can cut out like half your intestines and they're like, whatever we got over 100 feet

Yeah, I was I just I was I talking to that. I don't know someone I know had like a shit bag temporarily They got because of that I didn't like fuck his ass up at the factory But he had like something else going on where he's like and they just pulled down game a new booty hole I think they gave him a temporary setup where he had like a they like Yeah, yeah, he had like the colostomy but temporarily so I don't know if it was for life I don't know how the fuck they do that. I don't know either. I know somebody that just got one the shit bag I don't know if it's a shit big mic. What's the one for urine? Just only pee? I don't know that a thing. I didn't know you get a thing as a camel back. That's like those back

No, I don't know. I don't know where I don't know I didn't know you could I'm sure you can have one of those but a pee bag I wouldn't pee bag wouldn't be bad Shit bag is rugged dude to be out in public Right my friend has a he has actually a ring We're not a ring doorbell, but he has security cameras around his house And he's caught a dude emptying his shit bag in his driveway really okay. I mean that's a do you know that guy? No, he doesn't know that guy what the fuck would make him do it there That's a do you know that guy? No, he doesn't know that guy

What the fuck would make him do it there? Appropriate he had pressure on his body His house was in like a the neighborhoods kind of fucked up But it was like his house has like a driveway and none of the houses have driveways Okay, so people would go up there for years and like dude you'd have people would fuck back there So it was like we had that house. Yeah, so exactly. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, like it was like and it's right off of in Philly There's like Lancaster Ave and that's's like Lancaster. Ave is like an open area It's like an open-air like drug and prostitution market so everyone goes he's like a block behind so that was like the quiet area You would like to do shit. Yeah, but to drop out all your shit out your bag. That's disrespectful

Yeah, fucking is one thing but but he does have he has it all in vid. He is all he is like dudes just Boston on prostitutes quickly. On video. What do you mean? Like just little quick videos? Well it's just, he has the video, it could be as long as they want. But they're good at their job, man.

Yeah, especially when you're standing in the driveway, you got the adrenaline pumping. You're holding up a leg, blood flowing. Yeah, dude. Yeah, he said these dudes. Somebody's like, I gotta pour out my shit back, hurry up! Exactly. Like, I I gotta pop my shit back It's like disturbing you show me some of the videos and I'm like man, that's like almost disturbing You should put out a series it would be within his right honestly as I told him driveway like that's your

I'm like that is your content. You could put it out. It's like shit bags Fucking mostly people fucking probably this stuff you want to say just go a lot. You got a lot of blurring. Yeah I'm stuff out. Well, I feel like I feel like if you hang hung up a little disclaimer It's like yeah that point wrong like Vince. Yeah, but like we are live. I think people don't give a shit Or they just don't read it if it's a nighttime. It's like you can't see that but then it's like you're gonna go Man, I remember one time in high school, I was with this girl. You ever been with a girl and you're looking

for a place to fuck in a car? Mm-hmm. And usually they're like, they're just going, mm-mm, no. They're like, we're not doing this? It just, depending on the different spot that they're looking around, like too bright. Yeah, yeah. To whatever.

Well, this particular girl was like, make a left, right? And I was like, oh shit, you got a spot already spot already. Oh wow we pull all the way into the spot and it's dark and then uh mess around or whatever and then I get in the car and I turn on the little parking lights or whatever and Right in front of the car is a sign. It's like help us stop prostitution I was like whoa you took me to a spot where's that popular that they already have a sign here. Whoa. Yeah.

What did you like grill her on this? That's like when women have condoms, whenever women have condoms on them, I'm like. Right. I don't think she knew that, I don't know, but she acted like she didn't know that that was there. So we both were like, what does that say? Yeah. Holy shit.

I had another time, this is completely separate, had another time in high school where we were looking for this place and then found one, messed around. We didn't even smash, but I think we just like petting in high school, little finger-bang action or something. And I got out of the car to get from the driver's seat

to the back seat and somehow I dropped my phone. And I didn't know where we were because it was dark. And which sounds like a cop-out, but where I'm from, I'm from Lacey, Washington. And so like you can literally be on a street with hella lights and then pull off where you are the lights. Yeah, yeah. So anyway, the next day in broad daylight,

like we had a phone call. It's like, hey, I heard my dad on the phone. And it's like, yeah, we found this phone on our property and this number, dad, or whatever it was, and so we dialed it. It's like an old, this was when we had the LG Flip phones. It's like, okay, who is this? It's like, oh, this is Pastor something something.

It's like, bitch, you took me to a church? So, yeah, I finger-banged out a church unbeknownst to me, or at least in the church parking lot. Yeah, I feel like there's a lot of finger banging going on in the church parking lot, though. I think there's more inside, but I just didn't know. I didn't know where I was, you see what I'm saying? Yeah, I used to do behind the Verizon store.

There was a Verizon that they just stopped construction on, so there was just an empty Verizon store. There was a Verizon that they just stopped construction on so there was just an empty Verizon store that was like my spot in high school. There was a less swab But what less swab tire store? Oh the tire store would be decent I used to keep a blanket and a pillow they had the building and they had they had all that they like four bays and Then the building and and there was like an outside bay. That was like completely And then it was like an outside bay that was like completely Carport right yeah, I remember I but I was with the girl and she showed another guy So one time I went to go back there was already a car back there moving

And I knew whose car was Jeremy I'm like what the fuck god damn it. I'm a Jeremy Nelson strikes again. Yeah, my dad called me carrying a blanket I want to delete out. That's a real Name that fucking like it was up Jeremy. I Was there that night? He was fucking no problem. Yeah, I had a Graham cracker toenails my dad My dad called me carrying like the blanket and pillow to my car one time He's like, what are you doing? I heard you say you had a blanket and pillow your car He was like we don't I was like, I don't know if I ever have like a sleepover

I'll be like ready to roll ready to rock. He was just like alright, dude. I also had Like some like landscapers though the Verizon finally went like active and it was like it was during the day, too I was just going nuts in the dude that these Mexican dudes just walked out and just like came up to the car and I Had a bit of a go get out of here guys I think this but come on guys. I'm more You know what we all need to get more of off our ass with bold flavors and a refreshing citrus kick Mountain Dew will have you off your ass and have you feeling like you're on an actual mountain. A mountain where the weather is always perfect, your friends are ready to hang, and a day of epic proportion awaits. Call out my favorite flavor.

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Like I had this whole period of my life where I was like, let me see if I can get a hand job. For sure. Right? So a magic burrito was a hotel lotion wrapped in a face towel. So I would, all of that shit would be in my backpack. Like I had magic burritos.

What would you, would you use them like a Fifi basically? What are you saying? What's a Fifi? Like the prison pussy people make where they put like sandwich bags together. No, no, no, no, no. So you you just store lotion in the towel and case the hotel lotion And then you roll it up like a blunt or whatever. I thought you're saying you like squirt it into a towel I was still in my container got you, but if I if a girl was like let me see like I'll bet you would

Cloth I got lotion let's go You had the whole set of you know mobile kit. That's burrito. I see what you're saying. I got a cloth, I got lotion, let's go. All I need is your little. Oh, you had the whole set, you had a mobile kit. It's a magic burrito. I see what you're saying. I thought you were saying you squirt. I just need this cold, awkward hand. That's all I need. Yeah, true.

We were young. It's true, yeah. I'm talking before people knew the twist at the end. Yeah, true. It takes a woman a whole life to learn how to give a hand job properly. It's bullies so often. Do you remember when you first got one,

you were like, wait a minute. I was getting hurt, dude, yeah. The first time I got a hand job, I think it was in grade school. No, I don't mean like a bad one. I mean, do you remember when you got the first legit one? Oh, the first time I got one, that I was like, hold on.

Yeah, dude. It's crazy. It was a revelation. Right. Do you ever have a hand job that was like, it was better than what you had been doing to yourself before? I'm the best, bro. I'm the best in the biz.

No, I'm the best in the biz. But there had to be a time where you weren't, where you were just doing straight shots and somebody hit you with your first double twist and you're like, oh, you can do that? No, I'm telling you, man. You on your own figured out you could double twist your dick. I don't double twist.

I've never double twisted. You were high and tight or whatever you figured out. But you were on your own. You figured out there's levels to this shit? I mean, I didn't realize how bad girls were until like grade school And I was kind of like whoa. I like was like yo stop like this hurts. They were just like yeah Yeah, that's a lot of meat bottom parts worthless, dude Yeah, I mean I guess I'd have to say like a maybe like um maybe like a wish you I've been

Like the wish you watch it before back when I was a young man What is wishy-washy? That's like when you go and like the massage parlor and the Asian ladies like give you a bath and oh No, I never did that yeah, it's I wouldn't start if you haven't already done it, but the is it a dig thing or something When you're younger, it's just like you get those are Those are everywhere where I'm from. They're fucking everywhere. Foot spa, foot massage. They're everywhere, everywhere. Every time you drive around and once you know what they are, I'm like, ah fuck this place.

It's probably too easy to just be like, it's, yeah. You know, I ain't doing shit. I might as well just pull off. The problem is is. Kids, I'm going to the movies by myself. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. The walk, the entrance is the worst part because you gotta like walk in and you're just like, Jesus fucking Christ. Right. And then you're in there and then you part cuz you gotta like walk in you're just like Jesus fucking Christ And then you're in there, and then you leave and you're like oh Do they know you or is there like a process where you're like trying to not look like a cop? Yeah, I don't know I never I kind of look like a cop so I was like I don't think they care

But you don't think they don't even give shit huh no not at all there They a lot of them have the FOP stickers on the outside window. They're paying the cops. They're like paying. Really? Yeah, you can be like an FOP donor. Okay. I remember thinking that was kind of a wild move though. They had like FOP year after year all over the window.

Just says, hey, we donate, you guys leave us alone. I would say, sorry about allergies. I think it's a bad habit. It's a bad habit. Are you getting emotional? I'm thinking about the way she washed you. Goodness! You teared up. To be fair, they literally lay you on a table and just dump buckets of hot water on you and just fully wash you down.

Now, this sounds like a relaxing experience. It's definitely relaxing. If nothing else, it's a relaxing experience. Do you think people could tell that you did it? Not really. I mean, when I came out, I mean, your hair might be a little wet. That's kind of suspicious. What about just like your general amount of relaxation? People are like, motherfucker, you wet, didn't you? The wet hair and the smelling like lotion would have been more of a giveaway, but...

But not the light feet and the floating around? No, because you kind of like come out of there like, ugh. You have to like emerge back into the world. It's like if you ever go to a sex shop, you gotta walk in and walk out. And you're kinda like. Do you feel dirty? Yeah, big time. I grew up Catholic, so it's like anything.

Did you ever get over that feeling? When you walked out with your chest up? One time, no. Whistling? I wish I did, but I did see a man one time who did exactly that. I was working, I was doing demolition, and we were taking down a parking garage.

So my job was to stand on the third floor of it and just watch, make sure people didn't like have shit Fall on them in the little alley right and there was a wishy-washy in that alley what I just watch people go in and out All day, and we would all fuck with them We'd be like you and they would come out and most people would scamper right it's one old man Just looked at us and went You're welcome. I was like dude. You're the man. I was like. I just want to be like you and I get older Yeah, that confidence is that's that's nuts. We had then you get into it though, and then like you find out later a lot of them are like

Kind of like sex slaves, so that's not good. Sex slaves? Well what happens is if you run one of those things what you do is you bring girls over you say hey like you know We have a modeling agency you're really pretty you bring them over from Korea Then once they get there just yank their fucking paperwork, and you're like this is what the fuck you're doing Really? Yeah. I didn't know that. It doesn't seem to be what's going on cuz like Some cars outside or like old-ass Honda Civic hatchbacks and shit. Like these are old ladies. Yeah Well, that's the mamasan but then it's like there's definitely a dude running that place. Really? Oh, yeah, bro. Definitely

That's they're like organized crime. Yeah, if you know that's you're bringing women What's mama sign? That's the head lady the old man. Yes. Yeah the madam. Okay. Yeah, I know a little bit about because Seattle's built on whorehouses Yeah, yeah, like the whole Underbelly of our Seattle really yeah There was like one madam that had like 37 whorehouses and so the entire end industrial it being built and stuff was like paid for by yeah I was I was reading a book recently. That's fucking awesome. I was reading a book recently and I'll type in like Seattle let's check these Yelp reviews first

Yeah, I read a book it was like set in the 1890s. That's not what I'm looking for. You're about to find some actual ass for sale. No, like the history of Seattle and whorehouses. I'd like to maybe try history. Apparently they had a huge boom out there. Maybe that was the Gold Rush? I don't know. Ma, Miss Ma or something? First prostitutes were Native American women. Yeah, I'm sure they weren't really kind of, you know, hey guys, you want a job? That might have been a kind of a coercive situation. There was a lady Madame Lou boom who is mad right at the very bottom Click that Madame Lou

There it is Luke Graham born Dorothy Georgina Emily and Obin was a German born who became famous as a madam of a brothel that is now the partner square district of Seattle That's shorting what she did but they had like taxes They had a seamstress tax all that was was just How to tax the whores? Oh, it makes sense. Yeah, so like this city was built on yeah, dude back Is those little towns or those you know they were little towns originally? Probably Madame Lou Graham. I was like who the fuck is that? But everyone's coming in for working on the railroad working in lumber working on whatever so people had money

Yeah, man, and she was cleaning up. Well dude, back then too, say you were just like a girl and your parents both died, you'd be like, if you didn't have any immediate family, you'd just be fucked. So you'd just be like out, just like sitting there. Can we click that one right there? It says she got arrested by a rookie cop that didn't know.

Oh. The left one and the red, yeah. What does that say? It just looks interesting oh? Shit, she was so influenced influential that she had all charges cleared and had the police commissioner fired Yeah, dude, you know how much pussy you have to sell that if you get arrested you can get the commissioner fired Yeah, and also she probably had the dos on all those guys, so she was like yeah For sure she got the diddy list

That rookie cop fucked up Yeah back. Yeah, I was probably crazy 1890s hitting like whorehouses and shit in a new like in a wild western town that must have been right. Yeah, that's Yeah, they really not like they had tapes and videos on people like that lady's word was bond like she could Yeah, she just lie on you and it's a rap for you true Or yeah, or it'd be like, you know You might you might have had a guy in there like a mayor get like rough with like a younger girl And it's like mm-hmm. Yeah, I would take it like yeah that guy's a piece of shit and everyone would believe it

Believe her for sure for sure, right and they could be like I've seen I know I'm a lot of things But I'm not a liar true or I could be like he has a mole on his ass I can prove it and the mayor to be like his wife would know like yeah She knew that you had a piece of your asshole removed the new ass put on dude I was reading another book and there it was like this. It was like I think world no Korean War and they got stationed in Where Germany and they would have like their cigarettes? It was like this Irish immigrant guy who came to America and he joined the Korean War So like all the American soldiers were over in Germany and they would have to drive like the laundry back and forth but on

The road they would stop at refugee camps and trade like coffee and cigarettes to like starving like refugees like Eastern European women right and just fuck them what in like a hovel it was like I was reading this like God That's ruthless, dude Humble just like a shitty like makeshift like tent set up They would just like go back there and is like get blown by like starving women for cigarettes and be like nice Oh, they were giving them cigarettes for the head. Yeah, they like head or just fuck them I just be like, nice. And he was explaining it, and he's like,

they were freezing cold and dirty and starving. And I was like, oh, bro. That's horny. Canna beans. Yeah, that's pretty horny, dude. Back then, dudes were fucked up how horny they were. Yeah, but they got to have a pretty good skill set. Yeah, the guy did say he came pretty quickly.

In a sex tent? Especially survival mode, yeah. Right, and you gotta hurry up before your laundry's done. Yeah, funny enough, the laundry was being done in Dachau. What's Dachau? It's like one of the concentration camps. So World War II had like just happened So it was pretty fresh when they like were like exterminating Jewish people and that was like one of those like a you know

Dachau and whatever the always for Auschwitz Auschwitz. That was the big one, but there was a couple other ones Okay, Auschwitz gets you know kind of all the most famous one people talk about that, but yeah, he had to go to doubt Dachau and like he is with a Jewish guy and they like pulled up on it He was like, oh shit and the guy like completely freaked out Just from being back at the same place. I don't I think he just his parents were there or something I think like it's back then I think your family just get wiped Like if you're a Jewish dude, yeah, you lose like your whole family just get like obliterated Well, you mean just like during World War two, but the Korean War when was a Korean War Josh?

I think it was pretty short in the 1950s. Yeah, it was like pretty shortly after I don't know anything about the Korean War either than recently on like tick-tock and Instagram they're saying that the Korean War and All the black soldiers going over there is how? Koreans learn how to make such good fried chicken. Mm-hmm that could be because they love Koreans learn how to make such good fried chicken mm-hmm that could be because they love fried I think really they that's like the recipes from like Louisiana the way they do it whoa 1950 to 53 Damn, dude from the black soldiers because dude I used to work for a Korean guy, and they love fried chicken dude right Oh, I didn't know that

That's kind of uh I learned how to fry chicken from the black soldiers There is how big I didn't that's fucking nuts And they came over there and like all right, we're gonna Yes, African-american soldier station created during the Korean War Most likely thought Korean soldiers. Okay sick man that they shared the barracks with damn, dude Then they came out that they all came over shortly after set up the shops and made beautiful children Joe that was from there's a lot of like black and Korean couples and white and

Korean couples and and man the black Korean girls are stunning. Yeah, that was- Like that Kimura Lee look. Blazian was like mythologically hot. Back in like the early- Or even like white nation like Jenae Ieko or whatever. I don't know, is she white nation? Yeah, she's white nation. She's black nation, see I'm hooked.

Yeah. That is a whole look. Just pull up, oh my gosh. Yeah, it's- Come on. Literally the hottest combination by far a couple yeah it's pretty nuts true no it's an asian lady with a black attitude depends how it goes depends how your motherfucking shoes it depends how hot she is top stick fuck you

It depends how hot she is. Top stick? Fuck you. I think the hotter they are, they go either way. If they're kind of beat, they'll like present pretty age. If they get hot, they're just like, I'm letting go. So the hotter they are, the blacker they act? Wow. That's my theory. I don't know. I could see it.

I would. What the hell? I'm not bringing anyone a glass of water. If fucking I think it's more I think it's like They saw a city there in true. I mean that's probably more. You know what I mean? Yeah, cuz there's black and Korean girls in Korea They're not all here. Yeah, true, and I don't act like that No, not at all Bob's just making a joke, but the the but no I dated a blazing girl. What was the joke? I missed it. I was just saying if you're hotter It's like why would they be like me can humble like typically Asians are you know I'm saying that's fucking funny And I'm sorry I missed it

Asians are really like how roogie you know but Roogie motherfuckers a bad to be honest though I dated a girl who was half black and half Asian years ago and like Was she a cop too? No, she was not a cop. She was a fucking doctor. She was studying to be a doctor. Of course I only deal with women of magnets of industry. There's big leader titans in the industries, but the I would like be sitting there like drinking water and like my water cup will get low and like we're not even like making

A big stink about it. She would like pick it up real quick fill it back and set it back down I just like what the fuck Wow the hell is this? This is what this is part of what I do that was it I was just a setup It was just like oh shit your water's low and then you'll get that and fill that back up I was like man. I really hospit. Yeah, exactly the hospit I asked her what the fuck was that about she's like it's just been drilled into my head I could see that I have I have a homegirl. That's Like it's just been drilled into my head. I could see that I have a I have a homegirl. That's

Guamania and she's similar to what is she Guamania? Oh Guamania. Got you got you. Yeah from Guam Mm-hmm. Yeah, very service service of their husbands orient. I know it's fucking you know, not the worst thing in the world I think it's pretty damn cool So what are your what are your aspirations in the romantic sense? Are you a bachelor for life, or do you have kids? No, man, I don't have any kids. I'm not married. I'm single right now. I want all that shit.

But I think it's, oh my god, I don't know how. I don't know how I'm going to do it. Yeah, you travel. You're saying you're on the road a lot. It ain't even that. Now things have really taken off. True. It's been, in two years like to give perspective like I went from not having TikTok or whatever to like

Do you do you know my whole little origins? No, no, no tell me so I Own I own I own the biggest black on comedy club in America. I didn't see that. I didn't see that. In Washington, it's called Nate Jackson Super Funny Comedy Club.

I did Wildin' Out and a bunch of stuff like that. A friend of mine told me to get on TikTok because he was having success on there. And I was like, come on dude, who needs another app? And he's like, go to my page, screenshot it, come back the next day and compare and tell me if you still don't want to be on there. And I went and looked and I was like,

that's ridiculous growth in one day. And so I got on TikTok like posting the stuff that wasn't jokes, that wasn't material, right? That ended up being crowd work or whatever. So that's Matt Reif telling me to do. We were four. He not consistently was my feature, but we had like some gigs before, like he was the actual... Oh, so that was the Reif telling me to do. We were boys. For sure. He not consistently was my feature, but we had some gigs before he was that.

Oh, so that was the Reif man being like, bro. Yeah, it was Matt saying, go get it. And then I did it. And then shit went crazy. And so now I got like 3.8 million or something on TikTok. And so my road manager was telling me the other day, he was like, dude, that's like one in every 97 Americans are following you.

Oh, fuck, yeah. So dating has changed. Yeah. Because if they don't know who I am, somebody's like, oh my god, bitch. I've seen them on TikTok. Or a waiter's like, sir, can we get a selfie? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And so then it affects the dynamic of just getting those money. When you're dating and that happens, it's the best cuz then a girl's like Is it like that? Why what's the downside? I mean the doubt was plenty of downside Like they're not even now they're not even being who they are anymore. They're like, oh caught a whale Yeah, that's sugar. I didn't think about that. I'm just thinking about coming Yeah, that's true if you're trying to life-building that is Right before they knew that, coming was an option.

Yeah. Now they know that. They're like, oh, I'm, let's see how I can string this out. Women do that. They'll give you pussy faster if they don't think you're an actual contender for their heart for real. Eh, I can see that.

That's the new thing. You've been married a while. So the new thing is if a girl thinks she has no real future with you, but she's attracted, she will smash you. But if she likes you, now she's going to like, yeah, she'll wait. She'll string you along forever. Because you know what I mean?

Let's build a friendship first. And let's miss it. And you're doing all that being patient. Meanwhile, that same guy has no potential with her. It's like like it was cool Have you ever done that though is anyone ever just like sat and just like not smashed and built like a genuine friendship No, well you he said he has What do you do though? He was like hey Legos

Let's wrestle buddy have a shit little wet dreams Yeah, I feel like I you know, I wasn't like man I wish I did that I was I was with my wife luckily when like, you know We're all like an air mattress. So it wasn't like so you guys were you were in them You got it out the mud together. Yeah, so that was kind of nice, right? You know the woman you said you were gonna have sex with me on my back on camera A cop on an air mattress? That sounds really mean. I was like, really mean to say that.

But no, dude, yeah, we met before that. So yeah, I couldn't imagine if it was like, it would be kind of weird. But then it's like, what is even the problem with that? It's like having, it's being a lady with big tits, being like, you just like me because of my big tits. It's like, well, that helps, but it's also... And I swear to God, I've had this conversation many times,

but it's like, who wants a cupcake with no sprinkles? Like, let's appreciate it for every part of it. Yeah. I swear to God, I've had this conversation many times, but it's like, who wants a cupcake with no sprinkles? Like, let's appreciate it for every part of it. No, they're like a bag of M&Ms, and they come to you pulling one of the colors out, being like, let's appreciate all the other colors first, so then I know. Like, well, no, I like the yellow ones, too.

Most men are like, if I'm dating a girl or getting serious with a girl, I want access to the whole girl. Well, let's talk mind, body, spirit, ass, all that shit, if they're serious. Yeah, yeah. Right? And so what's happened now is there's dudes that have acted or taken advantage of that

so then they build a wall around it and now they're giving up the pussy last. And unfortunately, it's like your only barometer for telling if a girl truly likes you. Is, you know, yeah, she gives you the pussy. Otherwise, because she can act like that. Yeah. And then the girls are also like, it's like your only barometer for telling if a girl truly likes you is Yeah, right Otherwise because she can act like that yeah, and then the girls are also like you can get pussy anywhere Let's build the other stuff first so it creates this weird circle of just like does and you're both of pain That's the problem too. You're both open to if you're online dating

It's like there's just people who like they have been talking to or you have been or hitting you up and you got to be like Oh actually it's like I got somebody a floater and X of next that yeah That's that's a practice They say it's called cushioning that women do where they'll keep like Communications going with like four or five dudes. I call it vine swinging. Yeah, it's some fucking bullshit, man I have that's something I was never a fan of like they're just my friend my I have any fucking friends You have a whole column of guys that they would marry You ever been over there

They got a column of like they literally they run their dating life like a game of fuck-marry-kill. Yeah, true Legitimately. Yeah, that's that's pretty yeah. I never I was always more of a Boyfriend type I wish I was more of like the mysterious kind of sexy and she got a friend That's the one that always the one that they fuck. Yeah, and he's like, I just can't get a girl to like love me for real Yeah, that's his whole thing gorgeous, dude And and just he just got to the point where he like he'd had enough like he'd slayed enough and he was like I want a family. Yeah, and every woman is like, ooh

He'd slayed enough and he was like I want a family. Yeah, and every woman is like, ooh Yeah, and he's like calm down. We just talk we chill they're all traces lips. He's like god damn it Are you still talking about Matt, right? Yeah, and once that like catches on to once like enough women are like oh my god He's so hot the rest of the hive line kicks in they're like I want to suck his dick too And you're like well hold on yeah, I could see it. I guess I mean I'm not into dudes, but he has a jawline I think that's a feature that yeah like yeah You know the money yeah, but yeah, it is tough I never thought about the net the kind of like yeah If you once you're like kind of doing well

Then you have to kind of like try to pick and then we have to pick someone they just told me there's a dating app I heard about this Raya I've heard about it sound right. Yeah, it's for like it's like an elite dating app kind of like It's like it's like so everyone's not overreacting at who they see on there. How do you even do that though? They give apparently you sign up like one of those private Facebook groups where you got to like answer the questions And they vet you and then they let you in oh Really tell you I mean how else would a Police chief date house with a attorney date house with a so it goes it's like it's a brand new

Detroit lion in the Detroit market. That's my question How hard do you have to be balling like if you're like in it feel like a base? I feel like it's a bread thing, but it's got to be a notability thing right like a weatherwoman is in there Right on should be yeah. She's on TV every day. Okay. She's not making the same kind of money as But yeah, I know what you mean, but yeah, so they told me it was called Raya I have someone just literally told me about this. Elite Singles apparently is one. Yeah.

But my, there you go, how do you get on Raya? My users sign up by inputting basic information about themselves. Oh, they probably check your follower count and blah blah blah. Yeah, well my boy was like, you're going to have to get on Raya, dude. Damn. But then it's's like I don't know I'm not even a celebrity like that, but You might be married. I think you're still a ray material. I do get I do get stopped though in real life like Well, how are you exiting the Austin Airport just now like you know how you go at that last checkpoint They're like there's if you go past you you can't get where there's two ladies sitting right there

And one was like shut shut the fuck up. You know what I'm saying? Let's get a picture, sugar. So we took a picture and everything. And she's like, we are fans. So, yeah, but how do you date, if I'm on a date and that lady walks by, shut the fuck up.

You know what I mean? Like, I'm like, ah. It is a, having online notability or notoriety is like a blazing sword in the online dating scene I really got to test this theory out back when I was dating online So I like a regular profiles like you know It's kicking around regular do doing stand-up, and then I my friends did like a web series For and had like Comedy Central mm-hmm, so then I got a picture

I got to add like a small role in it So I got to put a picture on my dating app of me with the Comedy Central logo. Bro. It wasn't even right, I should've done it. I mean, it was kind of some bullshit on my part, because I had like a two second thing on a web series, but people see that, they go, TV. And the messages came in way faster.

I tried to do Tinder, I think it was, and so where I'm from, my show, it was a show before it was a club, super funny comedy show. And we had this backdrop, or like, we had a photographer, Scott Payton took immaculate pictures and he did it for like four years. So you could like just get dressed up as possible

and at the end of the show be like, Scott! And he would just literally be taking headshots. He was that good. So when I got on the dating site, like 99.6% of the bitches, okay, were Scott and Peyton pictures from my show. You could just reckon, you know what I mean? So I was like, I can't get on the app.

Everybody's literally taking pictures for my show. Yeah, I mean, I was a pig. I had no problem just utilizing that to my advantage. But they wouldn't pick me. I don't know what it was. I'd be on, like, they would assume, because I'm the guy that has the show and the star of the show or whatever,

that I'm slaying. So they would pick my band members that were sitting behind me, or they would pick the comic that's in town, or they would pick, like it was, my homies were like, dog, I'm crushing, I had a homeboy, I'm not even gonna say his name, because I think he's about to get married.

But anyway, he was like, I just saw him on the road in Greensboro, and he was like, dude, I used to slay off saying I know you. I'm like, what? He's like, yeah, we'd be like, you wanna meet Nate? I'm like, are you kidding me? He's like, yeah, like if they kinda liked us, like we would say that, and it was a wrap. Yeah, and dude, you can totally, I mean, you know, yeah, we'd be like, you wanna meet Nate? I'm like, are you kidding me? He's like, yeah, like if they kinda liked us, like we would say that and it was a wrap.

Yeah, and dude, you can totally, I mean, you know, yeah, I hear what you're saying. It is tough, because it's like, if you genuinely wanna have a family, you have to like somehow do the opposite of that line of thinking. And also, there's a certain type of woman that it would take, right?

Like, a woman has a sign up for a man that is like truly trying to go get it and she may not be his number one priority at all times. Yeah. Right? And that's not a normal, like this, she's gotta be raised away or have like a certain upbringing or be around industry before or have tried to chase it on.

Like some sort of a proximity to the game to be like, this is a good guy and this is what he does. So if they're like, and that's not on, that's not on the app, that's not a thing. So the women that fit that profile, like they have to have had some sort of history with somebody to be like, you know what I mean? I know what you mean that they're saying like their first rodeo That's a comic. There's no earthly what not if you if you popped there's no way yeah

It's not you you're 38 weeks you're out of there. You're going all the time the money's insane, but you're gone Yeah, you're gone. They don't like that at all. It's like pick some dates and come with me Let's do that part, and then it's like but you're still working Dude, it's nothing worse my wife does that she's like pick some dates and come with me. Let's do that part. And then it's like, but you're still working. Dude, it's nothing worse. My wife does that. She's like, we'll just like go out to dinner before the show. And I'm like, I'm not fucking going out to dinner before the show.

I don't want to talk. I just want to chill. We got to sacrifice and go, now we're sitting in Fuddruckers like what the fuck? You know what I'm saying? Oh fuck. People are like, excuse me, can I have a picture? You're like, I'm just trying to just with my family here.

So it's a challenge. It's not like to the point where I feel like cursed by it or nothing, but I could see where it's like. Yeah, I just let it rip, man. But that's the thing too, then. I'm just saying, like imagine, who's a super known face? That person trying to date, they have to struggle.

It's always there. You know what I'm saying? But it's one of those things, yeah it is. It's always there where it's like, you like me for me you're from Joey from friends like in real life is just like I just want to meet a girl that appreciates me who I am yeah like shut up Joey yeah my real name luckily I think luckily for me I've never I'm always just kind of like I'm always like whatever and it was again

I didn't have to deal with any of that stuff we met yeah we met on air mattresses yeah but I always do rub my like what little success I have in her face at every moment I'm like dude how you like me now. She's like shut the fuck up It is funny though cuz when you get recognized when you're dating it's like yes, dude I'm definitely in pussy tonight now It'll happen with my wife and I used to leave even like rub that in her face and now she's like me into it She's like what she's like here. I'll take a picture So before I'd be able to be like even to that part if I'm with let's say I'm with friends and

This is this is my new pet peeve Share it it may not even fit where we're at the conversation, but this is my new pet peeve If I'm with friends or really it's my own like road like my openers or videographer or road manager Somebody will like not know who we are like. Why do I recognize him and they're like you don't know Oh my god, we're on tour that's Come on guys, I was I was cool. I was flying on the radar for just a second my wife does it that you'll blow my spot up all the time And like they did like don't even care the internet the way it is is like people like see you like oh my god And then some people are nothing yeah

My wife will just be like oh, well actually my cousin my husband's a comedian. I'm like bro. Will you please? Yeah, it's weird to sell it. Hey. I don't want that she's like. I'm just so proud, but I'm like, bro, will you please stop doing that, man. Yeah, it's weird to sell it. I don't want that. And she's like, I'm just so proud, but I'm like, don't do that. She said she's proud? Yeah, which is nice. I know they do it because they're proud of their role, like what we do together, you know what I mean? Because we're building a thing

and there's such inclusivity and, you know, we're really building a thing. And so I know they're proud of it, but I'm like, well, just let me just. Yeah, dude, I don't wanna talk about it. Yeah. Yeah, that's. Which is weird, because I rarely even wear this jacket. A jacket is dude. I don't want to talk about it. Yeah, yeah, that's which is weird Cuz I rarely even wear this jacket

But no it's uh It is weird cuz it's one of those things Like if you were like a dentist you had 40 fucking dental practices, and you're making millions of dollars People won't freak out like that. There's something about show business that rocks people to their core. And I'll go a step further and say, yes, for sure, but then the social media, it's a whole, because they are taking, they're taking a shit and holding you like this.

Yeah, yeah. Some people are like, dude, I got your stuff on autoplay, on my TV, I don't even watch TV anymore. Or I got like, the amount of connection, it's nuts, like, I got out of an Uber two hours before my show, where my assistant and merch manager was late and I had to bring in a crate. And this husband pulled up with his wife,

they were looking for parking at that moment. The wife jumped out the car, Nate! Runs around the front of the car and beeline straight to me. I'm like, shit, and I drop the thing and I just book it, right? And she chases me and there's like this light post. I grab the light post and do like, you know how you can spin around?

And I do that and I ricochet back the other way. Her husband gets out the car, He's like she's a fan She loves you, bro, and I'm like I get all that well fuck that like I'm playing now. Yeah, you're fucking Can we just Let me just get a picture Come on. Yeah, that's always awkward and the husband's like yeah say cheese like while the love of his life is like dude, I That is the most that is the most that's the most uncomfortable possible when it's like

Roll though her him or me you and him I would say I think she's having a great time Yeah, probably I've I've like yeah, sometimes the pictures you'll feel like just someone mashed their tits into you and you're like I might start being like get get off of me, man. Get off me. Back the fuck up. I'll take a picture of you two. That was in Austin. It was in Austin?

Yes, this was here in Austin, the Moody. And so two days ago. And this lady came up and her collar was all smushed inside of itself, right? And she had to meet and greet and we were, you know, take a picture. I was like, well, hold on, your collar's not fixed. And I went to go, I was like, well, do you have a husband

or anything like that? And she's like, oh, yeah, he's not here. I was like, well, let's just fix your collar. Right? Fix her collar, and then like, it's still stuck. Her purse is like cutting a titty off. I'm like, let's, so I grab the strap, I'm like, let's move that, move that, move that, fix that.

All right, we're ready. You ready? She's like, I'm ready. I'm like, cool, we take the picture, and then she walks forward to the exit, because the entrance and exit's separate, and she's like, oh yeah, and that's my husband. I'm like, what?

And this big ass lice can do, it's like, yeah, man. I'm like, she say you weren't here, bro. I, you know, I was like, nah, fuck this. I heard her do this shit. She be doing this kind of shit in public, fucking around. I'm like, yeah, you know, I feel like a dickhead for that. Yeah, dude, yeah. She literally was like, he's not here.

But again, if it were like, if you were just like, yeah, I own a fucking 47, you know, carabas and people, they don't give a fuck. They wouldn't know. If your image gets plastered onto onto a screen it like deifies people and people get I think it's like a big deal It's like well, let's out. I'll say they do know but it's not like it's different Like people know it their church because they like tithe and they're like are you ballin or they know at rotary or wherever like true? It's a meeting of those kind of, you know what I'm saying? But this is just different.

So I don't know how in the hell I'm gonna date. You got lucky, you got in there beforehand and all that, but I don't know. And I never thought of this as one, this was, you know, this is an offshoot of what. When I was asking, yeah. No, I'm saying of fame. Like I wanted, like this was always the,

I was like I'm gonna get it, I'm gonna get after it. And now it's like, god damn, I can't find a woman that doesn't, that just, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, you'll find someone else. Hopefully, but like. Well, they'll burn out on the nominee. I wanna meet you. Like, you are meeting me.

No, but like, the you that's not, like, this separate from the comic. They don't say that? I'm what I do, I've been doing this for 20 years. I am what I do now. I'm a comic. You can't say, like, who do you think you're meeting? And then they'll say my government name.

Like, I want to meet Nathaniel. I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? No one's called me that since Little League Baseball. And then you're supposed to be like, well, let's just be buddies after you said that. It's like, dude, I'm. I don't even know what it is. Or I would, here's another thing. So there's a, check how awkward this shit is.

So there's another Nate Jackson, right? Like anybody Googles himself, there's probably another your name somewhere. For sure, yeah. Okay, well, there's two for me. There's a white guy that plays guitar. And so I would say like year five of my career, I was in the number one spot on Google.

You're battling the other Nate Jackson at first. That's sick. But then, so there was a backup, tight end third stringer for the Denver Broncos that wrote a book about smoking weed and playing football. And soon as the book dropped, he went, ricocheted into the first. He overtook you. Dropped me back like five pages. No, dude.

Yeah. But now I'm back in the number one spot, just whatever. Sure. But I'm on a date and it'll happen every now and then where somebody's like, how long did you play for the Broncos? Because they Googled and I didn't play in the league, right? But it still comes up if you search sometimes.

Yeah, yeah. If you just type Nate Jackson, but if you type comedian Nate Jackson, it's all me. Sure. So I was on a date and the girl was like, what was it like playing for the Broncos? The only place on earth that this says that is Google so I'm like you Google me. Yeah Like that's to me. That's weird Yeah, it is fucking weird

No actually for women it makes sense though because they got to do like a thorough Investigation to make sure like you're not gonna kill them So they all do that You know Yeah I'm not a guy she met in passing like she was at a show and there we are at a dinner and she's like How long did you play for like you went further to Google and ask? Yeah, you should have been like that was pretty hard A couple years

Elway was a motherfucker I did always get a kick out I had friends that would like completely lie to women. That was like their move. It was like years and years ago. But I've had friends that would be like, yeah man, we were younger. Yeah, I own a business. We work together and I'd be sitting there like,

you don't own a fucking business? But I'm like, yeah, that was always a wild move. Yeah, I remember I was in the movies. And one of my home... There was like a scene where the guy had a lot of game, and my homeboy outlaw was like, "'Ooh, I'm gonna use that.'" But it blew my mind at the time.

I was like, wait, what? You can procure game from just mimicking this kind of shit? Definitely. I didn't know that. I was like, you gotta be who you are. You know, I'm gonna be who he was. He was fucking in that movie It's good move

You're like you're with that no I would never lie like that I always felt weird being like cuz then it's like they're gonna find out eventually But like I had friends that would just like cook up these wild lies like one time my boy What's on the hood of other people's cars and shit like it was his yeah one time I did tell a girl I played on I was visiting LaSalle And I just like told this girl that I played I think like soccer or football for some reason I think somebody said that about me just fucking with her and I was like yeah I play football, and I think we made out because of that so that's all me. That's my bad, but I

Was hammered I don't remember, but I do remember I saw football I almost got a hand job in college for saying I was a seahawk so I almost got a hand job in college for saying I was a seahawk. What? So they did their spring training in Cheney, Washington at Eastern Washington University where I was a student. And so they would offer you to stay over the summer and like help the preseason stuff. And all you're doing is just like bringing them water and making sure the cones and stuff are set out. For sure.

Showing them around town or whatever, but it's a small, rural, populous town. As a black man, it's not as far a jump for someone to assume you're in town during the summer because you're a Seahawk. Yeah, yeah. Right? And I was like, yeah, I am. I was signing autographs.

As a Seahawk? My name, Nate Jackson, number 67 or whatever. How much for an autograph? I'm like, I don't know, five bucks, something for a sandwich. Yeah, gosh, no problem. I must have made 15 bucks and signed a couple footballs. And almost got a hand job, that's not bad. Yeah, but I didn't sign it to say,

oh, I wasn't like, emulating that just cause, it was like this most innocent little kid that was like, can you sign my ball? And I was like, uh innocent little kid that was like Fucking kid yeah explain this yeah like and then no that 60% of the people that are out there playing that are Seahawks won't be in three weeks anyway Yeah, true. I'm saying they're not making any googles it. He's like holy fuck dude right for the Broncos Well dude we're at an hour, man. Thanks for doing this, bro.

That's crazy you flew in. And I really appreciate that, man. No, I appreciate you for having me, man. I hope that, one, that we're friends now. Friends. And then, two, that the avid people that watch this can appreciate this dynamic that we have. For sure. This was fun and organic.

It was awesome, bro. Yeah, you're the man. You know what I mean? Yeah, dude. I hope it splashes and hits well. Sure, there's going to be somebody like, who's this fucking fat black dude? But there's also somebody else that's like, oh my fucking God.

Exactly. I want more of that. Hell yeah, dude. That's what I'm talking about. I just want people having a good time, man. And so you're invited to come to my club. Dude, please. That'd be sick. talking about. I just want people having a good time, man. And so you're invited to come to my club. Dude, please, that'd be sick. For sure.

And yeah, I give healthy deals. I want you to eat what you kill. OK, hell yeah. And we're at a, it's in Tacoma, Washington. So we're like 30 minutes south of Seattle. Right on. And there's another club in town called the Tacoma Comedy Club. I did that one once.

They're cool, no hate. But we're the other club. For sure. We're bigger and nicer and newer. Nice. And um, but you can still go there and obviously I'm a comic so I'm like feed your family. I give a shit. Yeah, do whatever you gotta do.

Yeah, but this is me inviting you to my stuff. I appreciate it man. Yeah, once I get a new hour dude I'll swing there. Yeah, or even if you're working it. Fuck Tacoma dude. I'm not even worried about the... What is it called? The Tacoma Comedy Club? I don't want you to say fuck. the coma dude. I mean worried about the what's it called the Tacoma Comedy Club? They were nice they were very nice fuck I know I'm kidding Very nice actually what's it's just fun to say that guy the owner as we used to use this stand-up originally What's he really always worked to yeah

Oh nice funny guy nice, and I'm so not knocking yeah, I'm pure It's hard to run a club man, so anybody that's doing it. I'm like that appreciation and respect. Yeah competition Oh, why don't you just have sex with one of your waitresses at your club? That's Frankly shouldn't fuck anybody that works for you. You know what I mean? If people found out about you two, sheesh. Yeah, we gotta get back to 69 and actually, we were really working it earlier. I just heard about this shit called a rainbow kiss. What's that?

We don't have time. I think I've... We don't have time and it's the nastiest shit I've ever heard of. But the kids are doing it now. Come on, tell me what it is. It'll be a great way to end. Look it up. I'll Google it afterwards.

Yeah, let me see it real quick, dude. I want to see it in Rainbow. Images, please. No, don't actually. Oh! Oh! Yeah, just heard about that. This is what the kids are doing. A supposed sex act in which a man and woman who is menstruating simultaneously perform oral sex on each other. 69.

Followed by a kiss where the couple makes a semen and period blood in their mouth. Yeah, that's disgusting. That's what the kids are doing. No way, dude. That's so fucking nasty. And there's another one called a snowball kiss or something like that, where she just like,

hock two's in your mouth after. Is this supposed to like, then I think after you're like, if you do a rainbow kiss, you do, I will give it to you if you wanna be like, yo, I'm non-binary. I'll be like, yeah, you earned it, bro. Yes.

You have transcended all of sexuality. That's way past either of the spectrums that we got, for sure I will call them like sir if you do a rainbow kiss. Yes, sir. I Do I tell them where to find me and stuff dude, yeah, okay, so Mr. Nate Jackson on Instagram and tick-tock and Nate Jackson comedy on YouTube and so so on TikTok and Instagram and Facebook, we release two clips a day of standup or crowd work

or whatever, two clips a day, something will tickle your fancy. And then once a month at my club, I do an eight camera shoot called the crowd work joint where I only do crowd work for an hour. It started off, it was just a challenge. It's awesome. Well, now there's like 14 of them. I've been doing them all year long and they Cumulatively have like 15 million views or something like they're going psycho

Well, dude, that's how whenever people like, you know, you know, here's someone I always just pop up the Instagram watch the first clip And I watch yours. I'm like damn that's hilarious. I was like like yeah right away. I always do that. I'm like hilarious. Thank you But I mean I'm just glad that like I get to show That I'm gifted in that way. Yeah, I mean yeah, cuz like you can go viral for anything you put online essentially Yeah, I'm not just like online every week wearing a wig or something. I know just saying yeah I mean, no, they're glad they're very funny. They're very fucking thank you But yeah, so on YouTube is where that experience is so and I'm on tour right now. It's called the super funny world tour and I'm rolling and it's going really good. So for 2023 and clubs

I sold more tickets than any other comic in America and then for yeah, damn name them. I beat him damn I did 17 shows in one week in Chicago and broke the record damn Yeah, it's been a lot and then so 2024 transitioning the theaters has been awesome And so we'll see what happens next and where that's going and stuff But I just want the people to tap in sick dude, you know, yeah, man. We should do something together Let's go Let me try my hand at crowd work. I'm terrible at crowd work. I don't do crowd work on the road. I do some. You're saying like a show? Yeah, let's do the show. We each do a chunk of time and that's the show. Let's do it. Let's do it. I'm down. I can't wait. Right. That's a fucking deal, dude. Bro. appreciate you. Thanks for doing the do. I feel evil selling that stuff dude.

I'm wired. I went from yawning to like let's fucking play part cheesy. Yo! So yeah, thanks. Thank you man.