Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast - Ep 595 - The Man Who Saves the World? (feat. Gabe Polsky)

Episode Date: January 22, 2026

Support the D.A.W.G.Z. @ patreon.com/MSsecretpod Go see Gabe's Film in theaters @ https://themanwhosavestheworld.com/ Go See Matt Live @ mattmccusker.com/dates Go See Shane Live @ shanemgillis.com Go See Lemaire Lee Live @ https://lemairelee.fun/ Go See Shawn Gardini Live in ATL tonight  @  https://www.shawngardini.com/live helloo. We got cusky back at the podiums this week - with our new bro Gabe. Check out his latest film 'The Man Who Saves the World?'. It's sick as hell, and could be coming to your city soon. See his website for info. Check out his other films as well. Please enjoy. God Bless. Visit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/DRENCHED and use code DRENCHED and get $50 in lineups when you play your first $5 lineup! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Wild Wild Wes. All right. We're live. Gabe Polsky, man. Thanks for coming. Yeah. Thanks for having you. Thank you for coming.

I wanted to bring you here. I saw your documentary a while back. I got a little screener copy. Honestly, I said, I'm not just fluffy it. I thought it was one of the best things I watched in a really long time. So the man who saves the world. That's it. Question mark.

Not the man who saves the world. No question mark. That's about a guy who didn't drop the nuclear bomb or something. Yeah. That's another film. Yeah. yours is the man who saves the world question mark which dude it's i swear to god i like i uh brandon our mutual friend from ruffal sent it to me and i was like all right you know and i'm

i'm like i'm pretty like precious with my time so someone's like hey do you want to watch this two hour thing i'm usually like yeah yeah yeah watch it but i read the tagline i'm like dang that that sounds kind of cool dude one night i just i saw it through it so congrats on that's yeah it's 85 minutes because i know that you know the two hours two hours scares people but Dude, now I feel like, now the documentaries are six hours. Yeah, it's murder mystery doc. Everything's longest. I know, but the murder mystery doc, I'm telling you, man, I don't want to start by it on a negative no, but like, dude, I would really like to move back from the six hour twisty murder doc.

It's like just, I don't need to watch this for six hours. Just give me an hour and 20, hit me with a twist at the end. I agree. I'm the same way. It's like a full work day. Yeah. I'm signing up to watch this lady get murdered. It's like, dude, hit me with the facts.

I know. Give me the facts. They're stretching, you know. Yeah, yeah, true. But no, I thought your, I thought your documentary was honestly fantastic. And just to like, I don't know, I don't want to give the whole thing away, but just to recap, I try to explain it to people. And I like, I always sound crazy. It's about a guy who by the guy alone could have been, what's his name?

Patrick McCollum. Patrick McCollum. I mean, obviously, it could have just done one on that guy alone. His life is crazy. He was a peacemaker, you know. He just does everything. got convinced somehow that he was the center of some ancient indigenous prophecy that he was going to was it save the world or bring everyone back together and thus save the world by saving the amazon

that's right i mean the second part yeah so but basically these indigenous elders from the amazon came to this guy at a at like a peace gathering in india and they said to him you know we think you're this guy in our prophecy that we've had for you know hundreds of years so different different tribes of the Amazon. They all kind of got together and identified this guy and said, you know, we think you're this guy. And, you know, initially he's just like, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm just kind of a regular guy. I don't think I'm the guy. And they basically for eight years kept coming to him and saying, you know, when are you going to come and fulfill this prophecy of ours? He's going to come and unite the tribes of the Amazon and essentially save the Amazon and restore the earth. And after many years,

he's just like, all right, like, I guess I'll, like, do what I can and go down there. First of all, how that's crazy he was able to fight that off. I would immediately be like, yes. Getting hit with the chosen one is my personal fantasy. So that's crazy he got to live that out. And it's nuts that he was like, no, no, no, no, I'm not. Which obviously you're the chosen one. If you're going to be like, no, I'm not the chosen one.

It's like, you're definitely a chosen one. Yeah. So he was. But dude, but then you've, so I'm like, okay, that's, first of all, that's a kind of a wild concept. Then you get into that guy's life and it's like he it's that guy was I've never even like heard of or seen a guy like that. Yeah, I mean, most talented guy.

I think I've never seen. Yeah, no, that that's kind of what drew me. And honestly, the prophecy part of it was just to me just so bonkers that I was like this, this is this guy's a bullshit artist. This is crazy, you know. And I was, you know, incredibly skeptical of it. And then ultimately I, you know, first of all, I started doing a lot of research. I hired a private investigation.

to look into this guy, you know, he was saying he's best friends with Jane Goodall. And I, I didn't really believe him there. I forgot about that. He was buddy, buddy with Jane. Yeah. And then, and then I, you know, reached out to her personally and got an interview and she said this guy is the most fascinating guy she's ever met. And, you know, one of the, and so obviously that vouched from, but really what kind of drew me in was how weird and amazing this guy's life was. He was like, the most fascinating guy of everybody is, you know, he was a Kearney, he was a jewelry designer to, I guess, you know, Ronald Reagan, John Wayne and Russell Crow. He was, you know, a piece at first. A carney. So he basically, at 12 years old, he, like, joined the carnival for like four

years because his brother got cut in half. Yes. Okay. Yes. And his parents needed, it's crazy. Yeah. I don't want to laugh at his brother. He got cut half. But yeah, his brother got fucking kind of half. Yeah. And so his parents had to go basically take care of his brother. So he was left kind of on his own at 12 years old. And so what he decided to do was join the carnival. And there he kind of met all these freaks and married a prostitute, which isn't in the film.

But and, and then. He's like a mythical guy. I swear a guy. I mean, it's mythical. It's like Forrest Gump. It's like Z-Lig. It's like the guy has literally done everything. Yeah.

And so. Yeah, I just felt like him alone as a character study. I don't know if you, you sort of like character study of movies or documentaries. You know, just a fat, just him alone I knew would be kind of fascinating. And then on top of that, you've got this whole prophecy. You've got, you know, indigenous, you know, going into this sort of indigenous world that, you know, most people have no idea about, you know, and learning about, you know, their wisdom and connection and all that.

and then having this guy kind of fulfilled this prophecy. It's just like the strangest story. And you kind of followed him around more so kind of like fact check. Yeah, which I could pick up on towards the middle, towards the end of the doc was pissing the guy off when you were fact checking him and he was just like, well, you don't believe me, dude.

You don't believe me? I'm the chosen one to say for the law. So, yeah, I don't want to give it too much away, but it was, dude, the documentary is fantastic. So how does that work? Like when you want to do a documentary, you just, I guess you just got a hot tip somehow. And then you got to go like, you just follow the guy around.

Like, what was it like? I mean, I guess you weren't with him all day, every day. When I see a documentary for some reason, I imagine you're just like living, eating and sleeping in the same quarters with the guy. I was going to sleep with the guy. You're sleeping in the same quarters with the guy. But it's like you're just kind of popping in, recording, popping out, you know, going back and forth.

What is that like after a certain time? Do you guys become like super close or is it just kind of like all biz? Yeah. Well, everyone is different. I mean, this one I actually really did sleep at his house twice, which was pretty wild. I mean, his house, he's got two places, one in Maraga, California and one in New Mexico, and they're both kind of really wild. Yeah.

But, yeah, I mean, in this instance, you know, it was kind of on and off. And, you know, you just, you know, I was kind of documenting him. him and following him, but it was, it was really kind of on and on and off, you know, so I would shoot with them for, for a few days and then, and then like, you know, maybe a couple months would pass. I would sort of shape the story a little bit more than know what, you know, something else is coming up. Then I would go and shoot that, you know, until I kind of, you know, was trying to wrap it all up and say, where is this going? When is this going to end, you know? How long? And you filmed for how long, you said? Yeah, about three years, you know, on and off.

Dang, so yeah, that's got to be nerve-wracking, especially if you're filming, film and film and you're like, all right, come on, go meet these guys, go do the stuff. How does you handle kind of like trying to keep them on a timeline with that? Well, I would constantly ask, like, where is this happening? What's happening next? Is the prophecy, you know, going to be fulfilled? Like, you know, in our culture, you know, we're constantly, you know,

we want results, you know, we want. And plus, like, I don't want to be shooting this for like 10 years. Like, I've got other things to do and whatever. So, yeah, I would be, you know, putting a little bit of pressure on him about where is this going. And that was kind of the most nerve-wracking part of this particular documentary that I made was just that it was so unknown where this was going. And I had no, I don't know if you've ever been in a situation where you get involved in something. You have just no idea where it's going and you think you're crazy. Why am I doing this?

I couldn't even like a marriage or something like you're saying. It's so hard to pick. Yeah, exactly. You have a little idea. No, a project like that would be, it would drive me insane to not know. I was literally on the verge of insanity. Yeah, especially because I, you know, you got to, I don't know if you've staked it yourself or you have financial backers, you're doing this and it sounds awesome.

And you're like, fuck, dude, come on. Well, this one I was kind of on my own because as you said earlier, you know, pitching this story to like Netflix and HBO and places like that. I mean, it's just so far out and so weird. They're not making this kind of stuff. No. I haven't seen anything like that before. And so I even going to investors, you know, they're just look at me like, what the hell are you talking about?

This is too weird. You're crazy. And so I was kind of on my own at a certain point when I decided to commit to this, you know, I realized that I was kind of going to be on my own. own here. So that put a lot of even more pressure on the financial. Also, like, one of my biggest fears is like wasting my time, you know? If you spend three years of life, like, what have you been doing? You know, you talk to your friends and family, like, well, what are you making now? A tough one to explain. I'm just like, yeah, this guy, he's in the middle of a prophecy.

They think they're like, dude, you're out of your mind and you got to go see somebody, you know. And so it's been, it's been hard to kind of, but I did see a vision, you know, about this film, no matter how crazy it was, I knew that somehow I could weave all these really interesting things together into something really meaningful and funny and really bizarre. It's like a trip. Yeah.

This whole thing's like just going into like a psychedelic kind of weird trip, but that all. also I think, you know, gives you a lot to think about afterwards. Yeah. And especially, yeah. Again, it kind of does too. And I'm actually reading a book right now, speaking of the Amazon, about the first conquisadors who like sailed or like went down, I guess in a canoe or whatever

navigated the entire Amazon river. And the author went down there because he always likes to visit like the historical sites or whatever he's writing about. And he did say, he said the Amazon in particular is like, he's like, it's literally like a magical world. And he's like, you know, there's obviously a lot of it's been like destroyed. But he was basically saying that if we do lose like the rainforests, we're kind of, we're kind of fucked. Yeah.

Because it's like it like retains moisture. And if you knock down the trees and plant different trees, they don't retain the same amount of moisture. And it gets hotter and blah, blah, blah. But so hopefully it's true. Hopefully he does the thing because it's like, I don't know. Again, no spoilers. But I was like, you watch it and you go, maybe he did. Yeah.

Maybe he did the thing. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you know, that that was the whole thing. I mean, I would go to these, to these gatherings, you know, where he was essentially uniting tribes at the Amazon, you know. And, you know, they would be these sort of smallish gatherings. You know, there'd be tribes from various parts of the Amazon and, you know, well, let's just say about 100 people, you know. And, you know, I'd be looking at this and they'd be doing, you know, indigenous ceremonial things with feathers, with fire and all kinds of things.

and connecting with spirits and so on. But from an outsider perspective, you're just looking at this thinking, you know, what the hell am I looking at? You know, this is so weird. This is about saving the world. Is he uniting the tribes here? But then I started thinking to myself, how does any business deal or any, even Jesus Christ, for instance, when he was doing his sermons and starting out and talking to people,

it probably didn't look like anything. It should come talking to people and doing about some words. weird stuff and you know no one no one would have said this is the guy he's going to yeah that's happening everything happens even on a big things that end up having these ripple effects that huge they start off really small and they probably don't look like anything that's special yeah well that that was yeah i started your podcast you know it's just you guys in a room and then it becomes yeah far from glamorous yeah that was the the meetups in the hotels where it's just like a 20 person meet up in a hotel convention center.

That was kind of cracking. That was cracking me up. He was like, bro, wait, this is the big meeting. I will say what I liked about him too is that like he would do those meetings. You know, it doesn't look great. There's just a couple people. It's true. And he would get out and be like, that was awesome.

Yeah. That's exactly. That was what we needed to do. That's exactly. He's like this insane optimist. And every time I would talk to him, it would just be like, literally he just did the biggest thing ever. And I'd be like, were we at the same?

place like what what is going on here yeah no i don't know have you met people like that that are just like so positive and so you know almost in slightly delusional way but it becomes kind of contagious and weirdly self-fulfilling yeah it is i yeah i i uh all my good days i can kind of do that myself a little bit but then you know i i slip all the time i'll just go anywhere to do a show and be like this is it i'm fucked up i'm done this is i'm going to freak out on stage i'm going to walk off yeah happens to me like 40% of the time. I'll be in the middle of starting a set and I go, well,

I'm going to have to leave and everyone's going to be furious and I'm going to go home. I'm going to move back in with my parents. I'm on stage. This is the first like seven minutes. And I'm like, I'll just move it back in with my parents. It's no big deal.

But yeah, I try to persevere. There is something nice about that, especially now where like, I feel like intense pessimism and negativity is almost like in a way where it's like, it's almost cool to be like

fucking world's ending, dude. We're screwed. everything's done. It's like, I don't like that stuff, honestly. Yeah, I don't know what I mean. I mean, it's such a fight to stay positive. Yeah. But it's so important. Yeah, man. I mean, well, it's like, how do you do it? It's everything, dude. Once you start that negative talk to yourself, you're, you're, you're, it's really bad. And, and yes, that's the, it's literally like the worst thing you can do. But there's nobody, in my opinion, there's like no emphasis put on the responsibility of not being a gigantic bummer. Yeah. Because if you ever have like a, have ever had like a,

like a you know i remember having like regular jobs 90% of the people i've worked with were like massive just chronic bummers every single person i've worked a regular job with shows up and they're like shit sucks yeah no other way this is what it is a cultural thing yeah just show up and be like another day here this fucking bullshit ass place i hate this thing you're like dude i just i just got here can we just chill a little bit so yeah i mean i wonder what people would need though because i don't know, I feel like without religion, I don't know what else could possibly stoke somebody day in and day out like that. You know what I mean? It's somehow a mindset. I mean, even like, you know, making documentaries, it seems like the greatest thing ever. Oh, my God, you get to tell that story

and this one and that one. But on a daily basis, the grind of it and the pressures, you know, it's so easy to get into that negative talk. Yeah. Have ever been, have ever been tempted? Even the best things. I mean, they should teach it in schools, you know. know about kind of the art of positivity. Mm-hmm. Because that's all related to this mental health. You need it. You know what I'm saying?

You need that. The problem is it's being delivered by school teachers who can be a little negative and nasty. You know what I mean? It's tough. If you're like a 27-year-old lady being paid $30,000 a year, it's tough to get the kids and be like, guys, life is awesome. Life is great.

You guys just got to believe in yourselves. Teachers, that's, you know, that's one job I would never. I would like to have, but it's a, I don't know if I could do it, man. Especially like, it would be one thing if you had like other sources of income, but if you're just living on that, like the teachers I've talked to, apparently they just get crushed by the administration because they're like, you have to do it this way.

None of it makes sense, but this is that the way we're going to be funded. And every parent is like, dude, you suck. My kid's right. You suck. Blah, blah. So with coaching too. Yeah. Yeah.

Similar. Yeah. About the parents getting involved. This episode is brought to you by prize picks. The big game is right. around the corner. Once championship Sunday hits, there's only three more football games this season.

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Get $50 in lineups after you play your first $5 lineup prize picks. It's good to be right. It's going on there. I love that. I don't know. Like the pressure for coaching, I don't know if that's like, is that like scholarship pressure? Like I played sports. My parents are just like, we're happy.

You're out of the house. They would show up and be like, great. Scores zero points. Mine didn't show up that much. But yeah. Oh, man. I'm sorry No, no, no, no, no, but I'm saying

I'm just saying, you know, I didn't, sometimes it's a good thing, you know, that your parents are there every single. I prefer them not to be there, honestly. I didn't like, if they came, it was like, sucks. Then like, you know, I would ride the bench for most of it. There's nothing worse than your parents showing up and you're on the bench in the whole game and you're like,

I'm sorry, I brought you guys here. I know. I agree. That happened in college a couple times, you know, when I played. You played college ball? I played college hockey. What?

Yeah. Damn, dude, what the fuck? What position? I was a forward. What? Yeah. What the hell? I didn't know you're a hockey player.

Yeah. You don't strike. I mean, again, I'm not saying you're not like rough and tumble, but you don't strike me as a fucking college hockey player. How did you keep all your teeth? Yeah, we wore masks in college, you know. Yeah. Oh, okay. Fair enough.

When you play it professionally, then the masks will come off. But why? I don't know. I don't know why they kept that rule. Maybe they wanted people's faces to stay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Until you play pro. Though it's time to take the mask off and show that beautiful hockey face.

For advertising. They need to see the faces. True for the game, yeah. Yeah, because if you're wearing a mask, it's not, you can't relate to the players. Yeah, that's true. So what was the hockey grind like growing up? You must have played. It was tough.

Yeah, that's a sport you play, like, early in the morning. Yeah, it was, it was, you know, you was, you were, you. you know, like anything, just such a huge commitment. But to find ice time in the more, oftentimes like when you're a little kid, you have to wake up at five in the morning and before school and stuff like that. I think a couple times a week. Damn. It was, you know, just like it was just a huge commitment your whole life.

You know, you want to be a great player. You want to play. Did you, did you cop the scholarship to Yale? They don't, you know, they give financial aid. So if they look at your income and decide what they, what they, to do with you. You know, they're, they're not allowed to just, I don't know about now, but back then, you know, that's how they did it. But I got, I got offered a couple scholarships from like Notre Dame and other places. Dang. So you're nasty. I was, you don't want to tee your own horn. I get it.

So how many documentaries have you done? I've done, I've directed four and then, you know, made five. Okay. Yeah. What was your favorite one? You think. You know, Well, this one, they've all been very different, but one that's kind of near and dear. We're talking about hockey. Well, I've done, I've actually done several that are somewhat hockey related, but I really love in search of greatness, which is about the greatest athletes of all time and about the nature of greatness told from the perspective of the greatest athletes. And it's really about kind of creativity and about how, you know, most of the greatest athletes

from Gretzky to Tom Brady to, you know, messy. They're not what we think they are. They're actually on a spectrum of like athletic ability and speed and this, they're actually like worse than the average athlete's strength and speed. Gretzky, let's take for instance, you know. I don't know that. Yeah. I mean, he was like an anomaly.

He could barely bench press anything. He wasn't very necessarily fast. He wasn't, didn't have the hardest shot. He was, but he was just. because of these weaknesses, he had to figure out, you know, another way to play the game. And he just, you know, was the greatest ever by far, you know, because he had to come up with these, you know, compensation tactics. So he just thought, he thought faster. The same thing with Tom Brady. If you look at his combine score, whatever. Yeah. So what I was trying to argue is that

I think we, we see sport in a, in the wrong way. We're not looking at the right things, you know, For me, it's all about like creativity and sort of what we do with our weaknesses, you know, and that we can actually reinvent our fields by thinking about sport or whatever it is in a completely different way. You look at artists, it's the same thing, you know. In order to reinvent something, you have to, you know, it's not what you think. I know what you're saying. It's not all about like the 40 times.

It's not all about a lot. Yeah. I mean, it's totally the opposite. It's about the mind and about creativity. That's pretty cool. Did you see the movie Inside Out too? I don't know if you watch that with your kids. I don't know.

I don't think I. Dude, Inside Out Too. About emotions. Yes, it's all about emotions and stuff. But there's a part in that where, you know, it's all about the kid having the emotions, the motions get out of control and they've got to find some like equilibrium. And that's kind of like the whole movie, basically. But there's a part in the end of Inside Out 2 where the girl, Josh, you've seen this movie?

This girl's having a tough time. Her motions are all out of whack. She's obviously sitting puberty too. so there's like new emotions and um there's a part where like it all like the thing you're talking about finally clicks and it shows that like she she's all like gung-ho like i got to be the hardest and fastest and then like she just gained some sort of peace in herself and there's a thing where she's like skating serenely through the ice playing hockey and i like i started to cry it was just such a beautiful i like stuck with me for three days just i was like god man that was

because there's so much going on in her life and then she just was like quiet inside her head and she was able to just part through, like, having fun rather than, like, gnashing your teeth. That's exactly what the point of this movie is. And, in fact, my greatest memories of maybe in life are, like, playing hockey in an outdoor rink, just skating on my own and just like that, enjoying kind of the feeling of it. And, you know, it's magical. Yeah. And that's what the essence of life is in sport, too.

It's just this free, this feeling of freedom and being able to experiment. And it's the same with, I'm sure, comedy too. It's all about just that period of experimentation and just unstructuredness about it. Yeah. That creates. Well, yeah, once you get in your head, it sucks. It becomes a nightmare. If you get in your head like, uh, it becomes ritual, I got to do this.

I got to do that. I, da, da, da, da, you know. No, I was talking to, um, God, I'm blanking on the guy's name Kirk Fox. He was a guy, Kirk Fox is a comedian. He's in L.A. And, you know, I was at the mothership. And I was just, like, in one of my little funks where I'm like, I had like started doing newer material.

I had to work out the hour. And I was just like, you know, possessed being like, this has to be good. And I would just go on stage. And I could feel crowds being like, ugh, because I'd come out like, hey guys. And they'd be like, you know, that's not what this is about. You should be having fun and making us have fun.

And I got off. And I was about to go on. Maybe I was between shows. And I was just like talking to him. Like, I don't know. I'm just like, fucked up right now. about all my stuff and he was like, he's like, looked at me and he's like, who cares? Like, just go have fun.

Stop being, you know, such a simple, such a dumb thing. I know. But I like, at the moment it hit me and I was like, God damn it, you're right. And I went on after that and had a blast. And I was like, yeah, I was doing a disservice to everybody else by being so self-centered and being like, no, I have to be the best. This needs to be great. And it's like literally a scourge.

We all fall into that crazy trap, you know, but it kind of comes back to what we're talking about earlier, about positivity. and just kind of having fun with things, you know, and trying to find that somehow because you get pulled back into that seriousness of the negativity. You know what I'm saying? Yeah.

You can't. Oh, dude, it's literally the worst. You can't perform either as well, you know. No, it affects all things. I'm up the age now. I'm turning 40 in like literally a week. And I like, like clockwork now. Like I was, you know, my whole life,

I've been so cocksure in terms of erections. And man, like I'm noticing now, I'm like, dude, if I even think about anything else while I'm having sex, you know what I agree. Like any of anything else enters my field of awareness. If I start going like, what's this like? It's gone. I have not even gone, but it's just not, you know, it's not the dick. It's not the dick. It's gone.

And it's like, it's been fun for me now being like, all right, how do I, you know, what do I got to let go of? You know, and maybe it's just going to get worse and worse as I get older. But that's a, I swear, that's an interesting one. I've never had that problem. And like, I mean, that's like a very, you know, localized example. But, you know, we'll see. That'll be my next quest to see if I can somehow overcome that. But it's, you know.

Plus like, you know, if you're with the same person, you know, it's a little harder. What are you talking about? What are you even talking about, dude? No, no, it's amazing. But I'm just powered by the strength of our connection. I have no idea what you're talking. No, yeah, obviously. It's like, you know.

Sometimes I find that, like, if you close your eyes and not, not to, you still connected to your partner, but. Turn on the lights and put on your plugs. No, no. It does. Internally and just sort of how you're feeling and, you know, less stimulus. Yeah. So it, that helps a little bit.

I think so. I think so. For me, I just eat pussy and I recharge. But the, uh, that that helps. That's the move. Like a babe. Time out. I need a water break.

I need a water break, babe. But I agree with you, man. It's like, you know, that's, if I, if I could somehow, you know, if you think about distilling all of your life's efforts into like one thing, for me, it really is trying to figure out how to kind of spread the stoke as much as possible. And not even like, I feel like it gets a bad rap because there's that like,

vapid version of that where you're like in the mirror being like, you're a champion or all. It's like, not that at all. It's like, no, you're a worm. and you're pathetic on some level, but despite all that, you can still transcend that inside yourself and not be a total drag on your own life

and everybody else's. Yeah, like when people say, you know, it's, I hear this saying all the time, well, you've got to love yourself, you got to love it. I can't quite. Did you ever try? I do.

I almost, yeah, it's just a weird thing, you know. So it's, I don't even think it's that. I don't think, I don't think, you have to, you don't, you shouldn't like hate yourself and beat yourself off. That's the thing. but yeah loving yourself how do you do that oh i love you so much it's the weirdest thing i've literally tried this i was i can't i was on lsd one time and like towards the end of it i got this

wave where i was like i got to show up for myself i got to love myself and i like looked in the mirror and there's a first start of my brain was like shut up and i was like all right my bad try to love you but you push me away but yeah i i personally think yeah i think that's one of those things that like it sounds great and then you try it practically and you go okay sure like this is impossible yeah i personally think you should not beat yourself up like you're saying and just rather than trying to play some weird mind game with yourself and like loving yourself just go do something for somebody else that's that's that's that's easy i can i can pump someone else up i can show someone i love them but yeah that whole thing like love yourself i don't know where that comes from or like where that

even originated because there was no way that's i think that's i think you're you're that must have come in like the 80s like that was nobody said that in like the 50s 60 70 maybe 70s and 60s but but i do think that love itself is a key to it you know that feeling of like if you can get that right here to you know love other people and you know to get that feeling for other people and for life and you know makes a big difference too it's it's it's similar to positivity or whatever, but that feeling of love is what I think we all crave. Yeah. And not to be cheesy or whatever, but there's something to that too. For sure. That was the, you say helping other people. Yeah. It's that makes me feel good. That transforms you. You know,

if you could get, wake up and sort of try and channel that feeling of love rather than hate or, you know. Yeah. Or I mean, it's what's what all religions, what all spiritual traditions, you know, saying, you know, and all the great people from, you know, Gandhi, Martin Luther King, it's the key. Yeah. Seems to, yeah, to have it, you know, have good, for me, it's like, if I want to try to alter my own mood, it's, it's, it's such a labyrinth and mind game that it's like, I'm just going to end up probably having a panic attack. If I, like, close my eyes and start going, like, all right, dude, let's make yourself feel as good as I'm going to end. I literally did this the other night. I was like putting my kids asleep, but I lay on the floor while they're, like,

getting ready to fall asleep and I like started having a panic attack and I was like, all right, I got to get out of my head. But I can easily text my wife and like, you look great today. And she's just like, oh my God, thank you so much. And then I'm like, oh, I feel good now. Yeah. But when you try to apply it yourself, it doesn't work. You can. Yeah. So what I do is I do really nice things for a lot of people. And then I keep score if they do nice things for me. And then I eventually explode on them and say, you've done nothing for me. Told you look nice 10 times. It's sweet. But yeah, man. It's a. Yeah. Keeping score. is...

Can't keep score. Can't keep score. Just got to be... Especially if you're married, you know, geez. Can't keep score. You can tell them how hard you don't keep score. That's what I do.

I go, look, the other day you left your stuff out. I didn't say anything, but I don't keep score like that. Yeah, exactly, right. But that, I mean, marriage is one of those things that like, yeah, man, it's like if you really want... Because I feel like, again, I only know my own self, but I do feel like, let's say collectively, it is like a

like a furnace because you're another person you have different ways on like this should be done this way this should be done that way and in my experience you either like let go of a lot of stuff or it just fucking explodes

like there's no other way you have to and if you know and also you got to really anticipate that people are going to change that nobody stays the same that's not the point of life is to stay the same it's to people are growing

they're doing different things and to anticipate that and then really, I think, make that just commitment to kind of go with it and not fight against it. No, no, I'm telling you, I used to always, always when I was younger, I hear people say, like, just that similar, like, kind of folksy, happy wife, happy life stuff. And I'd always be like, never. I'll never give up. And then you hit the point you go, I fucking give up, dude.

I'm done. I'll do. I'll just fucking clean up my plate or whatever you're so freaked out about. but yeah but it's good you know what I mean it's like it sounds not but it's like I don't know like you know what for me this is like kind of different but like COVID for me like this whole thing about like being kind to other people because I was like I'm a nice guy and then like I would notice like I didn't notice how much I did this before COVID but I would be in a grocery store and I would like I would just see a person and like my brain I would my brain was constructed to like keep myself

somehow above anyone around me in any way I could think of. So I would like see, I would see like a tall, handsome, muscular man and be like, fucking loser. Guy's probably a big dork

thinks you so fucking cool. Guys is literally probably a dumbass. And then I would just see like a lady like, look that fucking lady. And I would just do this in my head. I know. I'm the same.

I was not now. No, I would do this all the time when I walk around and go, just fucking look at this guy. And then COVID heightened it because it was like people would have the mask. I,

I wasn't a fan of it. I was like, I think it's weird, we're all afraid of the air. So I would go out. I wasn't being like super aggressive with it. But like if I was outside walking my dog, I'm not wearing a mask.

Like I'm, I'm fine. I'm not worried. We're all far apart from each other. And I would get like dirty looks in my neighborhood because everyone was like completely K-95ed up. And I had that like, it like heightened that thing in my head.

So now it was like enemies to me. And I was like, fucking look at this. Now I was like really amped up. And I remember, I think I was in like a Whole Foods or something. And I like, I realized somehow that every time I'd walk past a person and be like, look at this fucking

piece of shit. It gave me a bad feeling. And I just, something like snapped in me to where I start every person I saw, I'd be like, like, rooting for them on some level. It'd be like, I wish them the best. And I'd still have that like, look at this fucking lady's weird ass fucking pants. But I wish her the best. And dude, I get filled with like an incredible sense of peace. And ever since I've been, because the whole thing for me is like, even if you see somebody who's like kind of unbearable, like, maybe. doing something crazy or whatever once you have kids you're like oh that's somebody's kid yeah so like if my kids are out in the world god forbid someone walk past them or like nice fucking hat dumbass i'd be so

upset so i started being like well i'm gonna treat everybody like there's someone else's kid and you know it's like i would i would i would hope their parents would like want them to be treated nicely and if their parents don't care if they're treated nicely or not then they need even more kind of like loving care or you know loving care and whatever it's called and having kids really really really helps with taking that kind of perspective too, especially like with your own parents. Like once you have a kid, thinking about your own parents, how they dealt with you and having a little bit of respect for that, you know, being a dad and having a dad, you know. Oh, yes.

And and other people, too, like you're saying. But I don't know what that is. I had that same thing about judging everybody. And it's, it's a weird. Where does that come from? I have, if you can't, even if you're self-aware, like, why did I keep doing that? You know?

I have a theory. I have a theory. And it's a, my theory is that so it goes, I think it goes all the way back to like, it's just a thing in nature. Like if you're an organism. You have to size everything up.

Exactly. But if you're an organism, say, and you say, and like there's a bigger organism than you, you have a fear of annihilation instinctively. You're going, this thing's bigger than me. Now I'm going to die.

And I think humans have so many dimensions to judge where it's like money, looks, success. It's like infinite. Yeah, yeah, comparing. So if you sense someone somehow bigger than you, then it's like you have to somehow cut them down in your head because there's like a weird innate fear that pops up.

That's my theory. Yeah. So you just walk around the day all day. And then if there's someone that like you can just completely slam dunk on, it's probably just a feeling of victory. We're like, this fucking piece of shit. So, yeah. I don't know.

That's my theory about that. But it doesn't help you. The thing is that you think you get this buzz off it, but I really think it makes you feel worse. Yeah, it does. It's kind of like when you're in grade school doing that, you know, and it starts there almost. Oh, for sure.

Kids making fun of other kids. So it's fun. You still feel like when you're an adult doing that, you feel like you're a kid essentially still. But I, yeah, I mean. Well, if you're with your bros, it's fun to mess around with your brothers like that. But yeah, if you're out and like in public around, someone is essentially a stranger and you're like,

I know a lot of people do this. Start just absolutely ragging on people. I'm like, bro, you can't do that. It's not nice. Yeah. But that helped me with social. Comedy, though. Don't you always have to be observing and like it's part of it is picking people apart

or their intersyncrasies and I'll do it. If I'm struggling on stage, I'll sacrifice a crowd member just because I'm like, I'm not doing well and I'll just absolutely sacrifice somebody. And I know, I'm like, this is wrong, but I need this laugh right now. And I'm going to make fun of your hat. And I'm going to make you feel terrible right now so that I can continue. And I know it's not right.

But it's, you know. Or you're doing it to yourself too, like about your own life. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I do that. But if I, if I, uh, that's an easy trick to get a crowd on your side. Just absolutely just crush somebody in the crowd. And then they're like, all you guys want this.

You better start fucking laughing at me. I will fuck you. No, that's how my, growing up, my family dinners were like that, though. Like we'd all, I was one of six. kids and we'd all sit around the table. And it was just like, it was a war zone. Like everyone would start making fun of each other. Like my dad would get involved and like, hey, he would just like, it would be one victim. You'd be if it, if it, the light turned on you, everyone would start just saying whatever they could to just completely humiliate you. Yeah. And you had to like strike out

against somebody else and would turn the attention on them. And it was like, it was not, it was like every night at dinner. It's probably how your comedy started. No. It could be. I don't know. but it's definitely, that could be at least where that very critical negative voice came from was you'd be eating and like, did you have five other people being like, look at your fat legs. And you'd be like, fuck. You know, you'd have to fire back somehow. Yeah. So it's not the best, but it is fun.

I don't know. I do think it's fun though. Like, if fucking with people, if they're, you know, I don't know, even when they get, when they react negatively to it, it is so much more fun. If you catch someone who takes himself so seriously. Yeah, I know. I know. right. I'm kind of like a bloodhound for that. If I detect somebody's kind of like getting like pissed like that, I can't help it.

I'll start like needling and messing around. Yeah, yeah. But when I was when we were kids, yeah, my friends and I would just kill each other. Like, yeah, I assume it's like in every, you know, in every circle when you're a kid, we just kill each other. Yeah. Over and over. It's part of the whole.

And then, but people would laugh, you know. Yeah. It's just, it's funny too. that's a difference if you got to be able to take it yeah because that's my that's my mom's big critique and my dad loves giving it out but if you get him he's just like you guys are asshole he doesn't he doesn't like he doesn't like it at all loves dishing it out can't take it yeah which I think that's probably everybody but but nice man so so the the sports doc so you're talking gretsky who else who else who else is an example that there's tom brady gretsky uh so rocky marciano who is

was one of the greatest, obviously, boxers ever of his time was like, you know, really short. He had no reach, but he developed this style, you know, where he would just really, like Tyson had this too. He would get close. He basically was undefeated and he would get close and basically like hit from up close. He would just keep, you know, get. Stay in your face. Yeah, exactly.

And he was undefeated. But his body was like, you know, was not meant for heavyweight boxing. Yeah. he was short you know not very heavy and had a short reach but developed a style like lionel messy i mean he was also shorter than than most people he had this uh he you know human growth issue where he like wouldn't grow when he was a kid and had to get testosterone but he was you know he he also developed this flea-like style of like you know deeking people and he was so good with the ball and smart you know what i'm saying so yeah yeah that deficient

but he overcompensated in other ways. I mean, you go through, even Jerry Rice. So he's one of the best receivers in history. He said he wasn't very fast, you know, but he basically memorized timing and routes so perfectly that it gave him that, you know, competitive advantage because he was in the right place at the right time. I knew exactly when the ball was coming. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah. I'm just thinking of other. No, that's really nice too, because especially like with little kids I've noticed, like maybe it's always been that way but like I'm just noticing now because I have kids but there's like a serious paranoia about any even signs of like just kids showing any developmental delays blah blah blah blah blah and people really freak out about that and it's nice to think like yeah rather than trying to like force my weaknesses to become something they'll never become how can I kind of you know adapt and kind of you know play to my own strengths and like even like Greg

Maddox I was just thinking I mean he was not even in my film but like like same thing. I mean, he was, he sort of doesn't really look like a baseball player. Like, he's a little bit schlubby. He's not that tall. He's not that strong. But his accuracy and his ability to understand batters and, you know, was on a whole other level. Yeah. It's, you look at every sport, every of the greatest athletes. It's something like that, you know, that's completely unexpected. You know, I call it like Polsky's law because it's like everything you see. Everything you see is like the opposite. Yeah.

You know. That's pretty cool. You coined that? It's a paradox. I did coin it. Damn. I say to my family, I don't like, well, now here on the podcast, but. What?

Just that I don't like to be like a douchebag, you know. Why? Coining, what do? No one else is going to do it for you. Yeah. You don't do Polsky's law. People are going to take it and they'll call it maybe McCusker's law. Everything you see is the opposite.

Yeah. So what is the law again? You're saying everything is opposite as. what you everything is the opposite of what you see you know what you think so if somebody's like happy all the time you know like you know they might be you know the saddest people got you've seen things like that or you know these sort of paradoxes of opposites yeah like the service the thing you present is yeah the reality's probably compensating yeah uh hey guys real quick i have some shows this weekend coming up i'll be doing live stand-up comedy i'll be at the

Belding Theater in Hartford, Connecticut, January 23rd. That'll be Friday. Saturday, I'll be at the Egg, the Heart Theater at the Egg in Albany, New York. Both those shows are almost sold out, so please come. And if you want to come, there's a few tickets left. Also, I'll be in Las Vegas, then Denver, Boise, Idaho, Salt Lake City, Cleveland. Just go to Matt McCusker.com. There's a bunch of other places for tickets.

Thank you. I'll be in helium Atlanta tonight Thursday through Saturday please come if you can I know the weather's going to be bad but I'll still be there so please come Sean Gardini dot com the link is below thank you very much I'll be at Dallas hyenas the 23rd which is Friday or in yellow rose cane on Saturday panties in your mouth podcast come on guys fair did you ever see the guy on there's a guy on Instagram who does facial scanning where he'll be like, they're like, all right, this guy has this kind of face. And, you know, he has all these funny names. So there's like, like, tree face, block. And it's like, it's not like a derogatory

thing. He's like, these are the facial structure terms. But he'll like, he says like no one's two eyes are the same. And it'll be like, so he'll cover up the left eye. And like the right eye is the eye of the father. And that's your secret hidden self. And like, look how afraid he looks in this eye. And they cover this eye. And they'll be like, this is the eye of the mother. And this is like your, you know, outward personality. But it looks like angry. It's really kind of fascinating. Wow. And when you see it, it's like, it's like, it's not completely. bullshit because like everyone does have like slightly different looks in each eye i've been in the mirror non-stop the last couple weeks just trying to like see which side that is which eyes with and like

what it says about me it's kind of a terror that he like looks at people's faces and he breaks them down to a t and some of the people are people he like knows nothing about and then the producer goes oh this guy like killed his entire family he goes well yeah i told you he looked kind of fucked out and they the craziest thing they said there's a term called um but it's like it's called whites on three terms three sides of the eye so like when people have a lot of white showing underneath their eyeball that he's like that's like a giant red flag because he had he had he had done the guy uh fuck i forget his name the guy who killed his parents the grinder he did a facial analysis of that guy and that dude's eyeballs are like like you see a lot of the whites under his eye so i've been on the

lookout for that lately but there's it's like a japanese saying for whites under three sides of the eye and it's like kind of like you see that be careful oh wow that is cool Sam Paku, is that what it's called? Oh, yeah. Sam Paku, whites on three sides of the eyes. Yeah, I feel like all those serial killers, they all have that look. Yeah. I don't know if we're sort of, if that's a stereo.

I don't know. But they do have, I don't know if it's like, you know, they took too much acid or whatever. Could be. Yeah. And the funny thing was, so I heard about that, whites on three side of the eye thing. And I kept saying to myself, like, I would hear people be like, oh, I just did like a bunch of of ayahuasca and a lot of them would get this wonky look in their eyes and it's literally it kind of looked like you'd see a little bit underneath and I can never like pin down like what is

that about that but it was like a I don't know yeah I've done I've done have you know you don't have that you're free from what's it called again Tonosaki yeah sandbox what's your thoughts in ayahuasca it's well I I it's very mystical it's open kind of like a portal to different dimensions that you know it's just it's just it's very hard to describe but it's very mystical it's it's it's beyond opening a portal to something that you can't experience without you know taking ayahuasca you know imagine you know god or somebody saying you know let me just show you this new dimension or several of them of what's possible in the mind and you're just like, oh my God, this is insane, you know, to have an experience like this.

Sure. And, you know, part of it is, you know, and I can't confirm this, but is the healing, healing of, of, you know, past traumas and you're throwing up, you're purging, you know, you feel better afterwards. It's not that I didn't do it because I necessarily I'm looking to get healed or anything. For me, it was more of a curiosity and, and just sort of understanding, a deeper understanding of who are we what are we doing here what what is all this you know yeah and it's just if you're somebody who who is curious about reality and mysticism and sort of understanding deeper about reality and stuff like that i i think it's it's fascinating and enlightening in that way you don't go i mean it's definitely still confusing because it's like you're opening into this portal

and you're just like, what the hell is all this? This is incredible and crazy and strange. And you know what I'm saying? But it's not like, oh, here's the answer to life. For sure. Some people do say, oh, I was told this. And, you know, I met Jesus or I don't know what they happens. And then for me, you know, I can't say that I have a lot more clarity about everything.

But it gave me a richer feeling about life and what's, beyond what we can see. Yeah. You know, I don't know if you've ever, I mean, you know, you get that with mushrooms

or acid. That's what I was going to ask you. How does it compare to like a super high dose of mushrooms? I don't know if you ever done. It's a different, almost a dimension. Really?

It's like, you know, mushrooms you go into, in one dimension, which is like, I, I, I don't know,

I mean, it's also mystical. You're in a portal. You're, you're seeing things that are, you could never imagine, you know, but ayahuasca's like even a little bit of a different each plant has its own almost world or

something did you feel like out of body or is that you're just looking around and stuff kind of but you're just you're just in another world you don't even feel a part of your body you're just almost going into other dimensions with different you know patterns you're you feel like almost and again and everyone has different experience but I felt like I was in in some kind of strange matrix of patterns that that were, you know, and the patterns would sort of tell you stuff in a way or how many times did you do it? You'd have these feelings, you'd have these feeling, you know. Yeah. How many times did you do it? I've done it like seven times. Really? Yeah. So that's been my thing with ayahuasca.

I've never done it because I ever, I talk to people and like, I've done it like 55 times, like literally like 55 times. And I'm like, what, why would you think somebody would do it that many times well why would somebody i mean i don't know there are people do it for different reasons some people they like they like need to get healed or they're trying to get to something they're trying to it's a medicine i mean some of these shamans or people in the amazon they're doing it thousands of times you know so for them that that's not a big deal you know it's just part of daily life they they want to access the the spiritual realms you know they want to be close to that because there's a lot happening right now that, you know, we're not perceiving, we're not seeing, you know,

some people can be in both worlds at the same time. They can be in this reality, but also experiencing, you know, this spiritual reality at the same time. The question you asked was, why do they need do it that much? I've also noticed that people can do it a thousand times and, and they're still kind of the same, you know, which is, I don't know, are you trying to change so much? Or I see, you were saying it's like looking at it from like a cure perspective where it's like what you hear that like i've seen people get better mostly you know mostly you get better that's cool of a person yeah i mean so if you're somebody that is just like constantly depressed or has negativity just you know generally well will smith or better after the slap i think he had done

iowasca like 30 times really i swear to god he did he came out of the iawasca Pistol and it slapped Chris Rock right in the face. I could be, I don't want to be wrong about that, but I read his book and he was like that. He claimed like that was something that was something that came kind of for like the right time for him. But yeah,

that makes sense. So it's not like a cure all, but it definitely, because I agree with that. Like with like, you know, just doing like mushroom. I've only ever done like mushrooms and acid and stuff.

Have you done it like in a party setting or more just like, I'm going to go deep. I'm going to go on my own. I don't like the party setting. Yeah, I don't like that. Although I took acid at a concert and it was awesome. But that was sick.

But the, but I prefer to like lay down somewhere quiet and do it. That's how I did the mushrooms. And it was like, it was awesome. Yeah. It's great. For me,

it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, the experience of it, you're like, oh, I've all,

I figured it all. Well, you're in it. You're like, I figured it all out. But in reality for me, it does like shave edges off slowly. So maybe I answer my own question.

That's why I do it 55 times is it does feel like it like it like shaves off edges slowly. You know, It's like a 2% once you weeks later, once you like the afterglow and that stuff wears off. You're like, you're like, I'm still the same, but it has like shaved off a lot. Like the mushrooms for me. It works your subconscious, you know, really. And it helped the mushrooms help for me realize how much. I didn't realize how neurotic I was.

I always knew I wasn't like, you know, you know, like not neurotic. But when I took those mushrooms, it was like the five grams. I like laid in bed, that whole thing and kind of blindfolded and all that. And I, the day of I was like picking out clothes like, like, what am I? I'm gonna like wear something comfortable. And there was like, I was looking to my closet and there was like stuff I had gotten a long time ago from Goodwill. And I would look at shirts and like that could be on a, that could be like a dead guy shirt. And I was like I'm not wearing that today.

Like I didn't realize. And then when I did it, it was like it just really just kind of like, I always tell people it feels like there was like your, you know like your own frame of awareness is like a football helmet. You can't take off. And it was just like, take it off. And I got to like look at it. And I was like, dude, I'm fucking nuts. And then I was like, oh, fuck. And then, uh, but it was good.

And then like, or I'd like wake up in the middle of the night to pee. And I'll just get like rushed with the most insane thoughts of like, I got to get a back to bed right now. If I don't fall back to sleep off it. And it's like, it just kind of like dead in a lot of that stuff, which was, that was like nice. Yeah. And it's hard to sometimes you'll, you'll feel like you've got the key to life.

It's right there. I figured it out. And then literally like two seconds later, you forget. Yeah. What just happened. You forget. Yeah. It's amazing.

you have the most incredible experience and you know a day later you just can't remember anything. Yeah, that's kind of that's the weird thing. But it does go into your subconscious. That's true. And I do think it'll be nice, I said this before, but it'll be nice for people now who are like half to confront death. You know what I mean? Like when you're getting older, it's like, yeah, like that, that's going to be a godsend because before it was like you just had to like smoke cigarettes and like watch TV. And that's like a really gritty way to like die you know what i mean to try to like contextualize your death and like come to peace with it so yeah i think that'll be a good thing for a lot of people i think that like did you get this sense when you did psychedelics that like somehow you're this is where you're going like after you die

like into this kind of dimension or no i mean kind of would prepare you for i didn't get that feeling honestly. I honestly, I just more so get stuff of like, you know, mine's more about like life, about like this is just kind of what life is and, you know, blah, blah, blah. But no, I've heard people say that with DMT. Like, oh, like, now I know like, it. It did feel like that with ayahuasca that like somehow that I'd been to that place before this weird dimension that I've been there many, many times, you know. And so I do feel like they might be where, where you're headed you know yeah that's plausible i mean i again i don't know i i agree man i that's the one thing of like just having some form of religious or spiritual sentiment like sentiment like whatever

sentiment i don't even know the words uh sentiments is the word just having something to be like i'm not going to die and rot in the ground for nothing you know what i mean like it's my life is a meaning like that's it's so bad for you and i remember reading uh i think it was Carl Young was saying that like he had I think that's how AA kind of started where he he met whatever the guy's name was bill W and told the guy the guy was like dude I've tried everything to get off alcohol I don't know what to do and he was like yeah dude you're like 35 like if you don't somehow come to grips with like some concept of God you're toast he's like every person I've ever worked with that's kind of the X

factor you're like 40 and you're like I'm a staunch atheist he's like yeah you're gonna be depressed though so yeah good luck I kind of agree with that yeah or yeah some some spirit some creator some something i mean you know i mean we're here for some reason i mean you know where we're we're what's funny people like this is a childish superstition it's like i can face it by myself it's like fucking good luck yeah i can't i can't handle that yeah well yeah well yeah well that's cool man that's uh how long when did you start doing like when did that kind of come into the mix um i think actually during this process of making this film uh that makes sense that makes Yeah, exactly. But I've always been super scared of it because when I was like 12 years old,

I smoked pot, you know, and I totally freaked out and thought I was crazy and just like for a good six months, like, had a panic attack and was still like just in shock. It totally tuned me up. And I was just like, what the hell? You know, it was devastating. So after that for for like 20 years, I was afraid to do anything. Like, wow, if pot, you know what I'm saying? Like, oh, so you went from like, no anything. Nothing. Nothing for like, you know, I mean, obviously, you know, alcohol and stuff like that.

But because, you know, weed was so like insane for me of an experience and shocking. What was the bug out like at 12? Because I used to smoke weed when I was younger and I was chill. Wow. It was like, no, I did do it one time and it was chill. And then I did it again. And I just completely lost it. Like.

Yeah. It was just like a panic attack. I wasn't prepared for the for the psychedelic aspect of it. I mean, it was just like really, you know, I did a lot, like a lot of kids, you know, and just everything it was like this and I thought I was going to die. I thought I was going crazy, literally for whatever. And it was so traumatizing that for months, I was just like, is this real? Is this what is going on?

Yeah. And no one knew like what to do. They thought I was like. crazy. And you couldn't tell your parents. Yeah, but I, but I just, I did tell them. Did you really? I was just like, you know, I need to go to the hospital. Like this is. Dang, what they say? What's wrong with me? They had no idea what to do. I mean, gradually, the, it's dissipated. Yeah. I still never felt like my old self. Mm-hmm. You know, and it really kind of tuned me up and made me feel like very vulnerable. Yeah.

And that's all right. Yeah. That, uh, dang, that's crazy. And so since that point, I was like, terrified of losing my mind, you know. Mm-hmm. But ultimately, I gained enough courage, you know, in the last few years to like, you know, I was just so curious that I wanted to try it. And I kind of started to. They must have been terrifying that.

Like, absolutely. Like, and I think everybody's a little bit terrified of these, you know, these planned medicines or mushrooms because, you know, everyone's afraid of losing their mind, you know. Yeah. True. But I think part of it is, is that's what we, kind of need to do that this world is rough yeah i've been i've been just for like you know was you doing a podcast you go i'm like i'm like i'm like i should know like what's the top 10 news

stories right now and i've been like grok and being like yo what's hit me with the top 10 news stories yeah so scary everything you read is like really bad yeah it's like fuck this is you know and it is it is funny i mean it's one of those things where it's like we should just get along but it's like it's got to be something we can do this is This is kind of nuts. When you read every story, it's just like, the technology is too good. We can't keep fighting. The technology is too strong.

Get into like bio weapons, all this other shit. And it's like, dude, we got to be nice. Literally, we're going to die. We're all going to die in like a hot, nasty flash. And it's going to be pretty sad. And going back to the movie, I mean, you know, I guess what I learned was that a lot of these indigenous prophecies kind of were all saying the same thing. so for the past like 100 thousands of years they've been saying you know at this time the world would be

going through incredibly difficult place like cataclysmic kind of things and that it will be in such a bad place that you know we're going to really need indigenous wisdom go back to the original they called the original order you know the go back to the origins you know of indigenous you know of indigenous wisdom and connection to the earth that we're going to need to basically save ourselves. Yeah. You know, part of that is connection to, you know, the earth, listening to the earth, listening to all what's going on and then behaving in the right way. I don't know.

Yeah, I mean, it's fair. Especially here we're going to run out of water. It's like, fuck. Yeah. Three quarters of the world. It's all water. Yeah. Fucking use it up.

But yeah, that's, yeah. I mean, the thing that freaks me out is I think human beings need a cataclysm. If you're not going to like completely like rock your socks with psychedelics, it's like, well, reality is going to reach a fever pitch so hard that like it's either going to make a plague. You know, COVID was like a minor. That was like a little bit. But like, I mean, it's nothing like, you know, like the black death in Europe. That was like a real kind of rock your socks moment.

COVID was like scary, but, you know, it wasn't like, you know, a. A ton of kids dying. It was still like the elderly, which is like, you know, sucks. But it's not like as gripping, I would say, as like every, you know, 10th kid fucking dying, which is like, maybe we'll never have that again because of medicine. But, but yeah, it's a, I do worry that humans need another big old cataclysm to kind of like, be like, all right, all right, all right. And I think now, like, God knows what that could look like if it's not a natural disaster.

If it's like a man-made cataclysm, that could be rough. Yeah. And it's for like, for what? You know what I mean? Like what are we, what are we doing here? Yeah, I mean,

I don't know. Yeah, the reality is definitely getting weirder and weirder, you know, right now. Yeah. The world, it's just an understanding,

reality, understanding, you know, what to believe, you know, that's kind of, these are big things in my movie too. It's just what,

what stories do we choose to believe? What do we, believe in this kind of chaos, you know. Yeah. You know. It's true. Yeah. Again, I just read the news now and I just pray, none of this is true.

I hope it's all fake. I hope it's staged to scare me. It's like best case scenario. And you look at it like now these are probably a bunch of psychos fighting and, you know. Yeah. We shall see. But Gabe, thank you, brother. Thank you.

And, uh, dude, definitely go check out the movie. It's called the man who saves the world, question mark. And it's, dude, I, I'm telling you, I liked it so much. I was, as soon as I watched it, I was, I was talking Brandon. I was like, dude, this is, the shit was awesome. Where the fuck? Where did you get?

Where'd you get this? So what did, you did a theater run in it, right? You released it in theater. Yeah, so we're still, we're still in theaters. We're doing basically like a tour, like a comedy tour. We're basically, you know, been all over the country and, you know. So people at the end of the month where we're doing four cities, you know, we're doing San Francisco on the 27th and then Oakland on the 28th and then Boulder on the 30th.

This is January? January. January. Okay. Nice. And then from there, what are the plans just keep? Yeah. So we're kind of building, you know, this grassroots, you know, brand, you know, audience swelling. And then ultimately, you know, it'll be more widely available. Cool. Yeah. So we're just, we're out there getting the word out and doing these theatrical events. Nice. What do you, what do you have, do you have anything down the pipe? Or you, or wouldn't it be in Austin, by the way, February 26th.

Oh, there you go. Nice, man. Do you have any other projects you want to work on? You know, I'm so focused on just taking care of this that it's kind of my main focus right now is just making sure that this is released well. And then, yeah, I've got a bunch of other things I'm sort of thinking about. Cool. Yeah. All right, man. Well, dude, thank you. Yeah. Thank you, dude. Of course. Watch new episodes of Matt and Shane's secret podcast on Spotify. Do it.