Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast - S3 Ep33: Ep 141- Awash in Propagander

Episode Date: August 5, 2019

God damn...psy-ops all around as the D.A.W.G.Z. try to establish some sense of reality. Maybe they never will. Maybe no one will ever again.  God damn

episode 141 dude why not just get into it god damn I literally feel guilty every time that we talk and we're not just casting yeah yeah yeah it's like a leak

in an oil pipeline dude I should have saved that news story for now yeah not that one yeah the uh trip to the grove

marred again by a horrific death hold on now every time I go to Williams Grove. Marred again by a horrific death. Hold on now. Every time I go to Williams Grove, dude, someone gets fucking... So you were at the racetrack. You were at the racetrack. We went down the track. It's so fucking fun.

I bet. It's so fun. Unless you get hit by a fucking car. So this is... What's it called? Like, not go-kart racing, but it's... Sprint car. Sprint car.

Yeah. Sprint car racing. They fly, dude. It is fucking insane. You can't understand it until you're there. That's what people say about NASCAR. Oh, I'm sure NASCAR is ridiculous. People are like, dude, if you went to a NASCAR event, you'd become a NASCAR fan.

Yeah. Which is why I don't go, because I don't want to become... And it's not even like I don't want to be a NASCAR fan. I just don't need, like, that itch in my life. Well, I don't understand. Like, what are you checking? I'm like, fucking rankings. See how Kendrick's doing?

See how Kendrick's doing? Checking it on that 63 car. Yeah. Yeah, this is like, dude. And first off, they're out of control the whole fucking time. They're on the dirt. Every turn they make, they're swerving, and then they hit the straightaway and go. They go so fucking fast.

I'm just trying to think, what kind of dude does it take to be like a dude? Because you've got to work your way up through the dirt tracks. You don't just get to hop in a NASCAR. Williams Grove is like a serious raceway too.

Yeah, man. Those guys are like good. I used to, one of my roommates was a dirt track driver. I don't think he ever took it down to Williams Grove. That's where the big boys,

he was probably like on another track. But they're going to have to do something about that fucking track. Well, I mean, again,

a guy died last year and then while we're there, a guy got fucking guy got hit by a car. Then this was not, this is a pedestrian. This was, I think he was a pit crew guy or he was like something. He was down on the track. A car flipped over the fence and hit him.

How did the driver of the flip car was fine? Probably. Yeah. Relatively fine, I guess. Yeah, you're in those. They all crash. They crash the whole time. It's rare that they get around three laps.

It's usually one or two or three laps, then someone crashes. Then everybody goes slow for two laps. They get the car off the track and then start flying again. Do they finish the race once somebody dies? No, when that guy died, they called it. What?

That's got to suck. Also, 61 was the winner. Was he really? He was in first when the guy got killed. So that's how they just race until someone dies, and then they go home? Yeah, they race until someone dies, and they're like, all right, whoever was winning when that guy got hit, you win. The race never ends.

It was fucking nuts, man. What was the crowd like? Well, it's so loud. It's's so loud you couldn't hear it because we were on the infield uh on the other side i mean the whole thing's like less it's like the size of a football how much does the tickets cost 15 bucks i mean bring your beer if you think about what they're selling dude possibility of a faces of death video live in person. If you go every year, you're going to catch somebody by the dust. I'm two for two. That's insane.

Thankfully, I wasn't there when... For what, $30? You've seen two people die for $30? Yeah, it's pretty good. It's not bad. I didn't see this guy die, though. If I did, that would be pretty fucked up. Did you see him get hit?

Apparently, he was standing on the bed of a truck. Oh. He was a 67-year-old man. He went out on a shield. Like, he went out dying exactly how he would have wanted to. He went straight to Valhalla, dude. That's exactly what I said when it happened.

I was like, that man was just sent to Valhalla. I said that in the parking lot. We went back on the grass and started chugging some beers for him. You had to. R.I.P. Damn, he bit it.

He squirted that shit in it. He did the Mad Max squirt in his mouth, dude, and stepped up. It was likeI.P. Damn, he bit it. He squirted that shit in it. He did the Mad Max squirt in his mouth, dude, and stepped up. It was like, blop. Apparently, people I know knew him. Yeah. And they were like, he was such a fucking nice dude.

Really? He was 67. I mean, dude, at 67. A fucking car flipped out of a racetrack and crushed him. That's one way to die, dude. That's a good way to go. He's getting immortalized at the track. He's going to have have a memorial now what would you rather do just like slowly shit yourself and turn like 73 or just have that one split second of like whoop i just dude i was on the

plane i was thinking about crashing the whole time every time i was on a small plane too so we were hitting like lots of hard turbulence and i was like dude that feeling of like so even when the plane dips a little from turbulence when you, it's just that feeling the whole time and then you die. It's just like your stomach's dropping. You're like, oh, oh, oh. Plane crash must be, because you have a lot of time to think about it.

Yeah, man. You got a lot of time to be like, oh. Especially when the noise kicks in. Once you know you're going down, it goes, oh. It's just turbulence, just turbulence. Once you hear, oh, you're going down, it goes. It's just turbulence. Just turbulence. Once you hear it, you're like, oh, dude, we're definitely dying.

All of us are dying right now. Just women screaming and shit. People, that's what I think would bother them. I mean, obviously, you know, impending death wouldn't be great. For sure. But like the paranoia or the hysteria on the plane, just the pandemonium would just be fucking horrendous. Especially like I'd be my girlfriend would be clinging to me. Dying in like a panic like that. Yeah. And, like, my girlfriend would be clinging to me. Dying in, like, a panic like that?

Yeah. Fuck that. And with your girlfriend, where, like, she's clinging on to you. Yeah, where she's screaming incoherent shit. And you're just like... You're just like, shut up. Fuck. Just one second.

Just like... Shut up. We're going to die. Do you want to seriously spend your last 30 seconds like this? Oh, man. I don't know. I'd be fucking freaking out. Yeah, of course.

We had some hard turb, and I was just like, we go out yeah i tried to start thinking about the podcast i'm like if i died in a plane on the way here probably be pretty good for the podcast i was like it'd be all right i know i think the cast would suffer i mean we get a nice little pop we get it in like the daily time i got about eight i got about eight flights this august dude you'll be really a decent chance i have big bopper out and go down castle live forever though i mean if one of us bites it in a fucking airplane accident ah it'd be tight if the airplane i started i was reading uh the atlantic while i was flying and there was an article i wanted to read about like the disappearance of the malaysian airliner yeah i got like three words in i'm like i'm not fucking reading this shit right now. I just flipped over

to like a thing about sexual harassment. I'm like, I'm not reading this. Yeah, I was watching a movie, an inflate movie. I forget which one it was,

but there was a plane crash in it. And like, so it's on my screen and I'm like looking around like people probably think I'm a fucking asshole for this. I'm just sitting on a flight watching planes,

making everyone in my row watch a plane crash. Dude, dude, think about that. A guy fucking died while i was out there boozing dude yeah how did everyone just shuffle out there like yeah everyone silently people were like crying and shit yeah i mean a guy died it was i hear you and a whole in front of a whole fucking bleacher of people guy got fucking squashed by a car i mean mean, what's funny, too, because I was just,

that book I read, All Things Shining or All the Shining Things, I think the dude who told me to check it out was Big Dan, dude, from, I think, not Susie Addict, Louisville.

Okay. He, I had to give him a shout out. But they were talking about how that's like our last venue left for people to find meaning and like watching like sports or things or watching watching someone just like transcend like oh my god these guys are flying everyone is like collectively like not thinking they're just like ah then the guy dies it's like there's a priest had a heart attack during church basically i told you that uh at my

uncle's so my dad's sister yeah married this guy so he's my uncle but i don't know his his parents we're at his parents funeral one of them yeah and the priest was doing the fucking incense thing the bell or like you know that thing that sways yeah the uh smoke it comes out the incense yeah and he fucking mid sway like passed out shit flew everywhere and he fainted on the thing and my uncle was standing next to me. He was just like, Jesus Christ. And I was like, yes. That guy's the funniest.

I didn't know he was funny. I didn't know my uncle was funny until that moment. The priest passed out, and he just goes, Jesus Christ. Dude, I was in the absolute pinnacle of religiousness yesterday. Oh, fuck. Shane, it was the weirdest thing I've ever seen. I was in Alabama. We flew down to Alabama.

It was one night. We got up early in the morning, flew down there. You were at a black church in Alabama? I wasn't even in a black church, bro. It wasn't a black church. No, this was a... So it was my babe's younger cousin.

So black dude married a white chick. Married a honky in Alabama? Watch out now. She's from Tejas. They're still not big fans, I don't think. Tejas, honky, dude. Yeah. But they were from, like, the church they were in.

So you've seen a wedding. It's, like, you know, bridegroom, priest, or whoever, saying the vows. And then there's, like, all the bridesmaids and groomsmen. Everyone's kind of, like, just sitting there all silently. There was a dude playing, like, religious, like, folk, like, cool, like, new like cool like new you're like like new christians are so fucking gay dude it was just like it's you are the way and like the bride the whole time like there's they were breaking a song and the whole groom party were just like sway and dance and like hold their hands up and praise dude

it was and the minister the whole time was like dude it was we walked in like five minutes late and i walked i looked at britney i was like what she's it was, we walked in like five minutes late. And I looked at Brittany. I was like, what? She's like, shut up. Shut up. And I'm like, what the fuck is going on? She's like, shut up. So it was like a megachurch?

It was like a small, it was like a small, it would have been like a small version of a megachurch. Yeah. It was like, I was hanging around. It was megachurch vibes for sure. Oh my God. And it was like, dude, I get in there and I'm like, what? And like some of her family's like pretty religious too. Yeah.

So I'm like trying to talk shop. After the ceremony, I'm like, yo, I get in there and I'm like, well, and like some of her family's like pretty religious too. Yeah. So I'm like trying to talk shop after the ceremony. I'm like, yo, you fucking see that? And the one guy, the one guy was in the wedding. I'm like, oh, fuck it, Fred. You're all about that shit too. Dude, I've been to, I've been to weddings like that. Uh, my ex went to Messiah college in Mechanicsburg, which is like a super Christian. And so whenever her friends got married, they got married in types of like weird christian churches where they like sing like one of the groomsmen was like he honored

them by singing a song one of the groomsmen so like the best man was like i have a song to sing he's like how awesome is our god like it was shit like that like guys how cool was our god that's that was the the whole ceremony was fast, dude. These were youngins still. They're in this like, and the whole time I'm watching, I'm like, I guess this is what you were supposed to do. You're supposed to totally believe in God and get married when you're 22. No. I'm watching this just like, dude, this is fucking

crazy because the dude's a little older saying the vows or the guy leading the whole thing. He was the chap, whatever it was called, Deacon. He's just like, yeah, I know you love god so much and so does your wife and you guys just love god and then they like break out in a song like god is the best ever and dude this one guy was playing the guitar and they'd all like the whole bridal party would be like pointing to the sky and like yes you are god i was just like god what yeah i'll give you got to give the catholics

some credit yeah just like all right shut the fuck up we're gonna say weird shit but no one believes it just shut up just everyone be quiet and sad we know this is weird let's just get it over with fucking awkward and quiet for an hour and get the fuck out of here yeah man but it was so it was so there was that dynamic going on super like dudes with like tucked in button downs and into like khakis like hopping up and down and being like guys how cool is god dude that sucks it was so weird and the whole time i had just read uh dude that book i read it was no no yeah the book talks about moby dick and how like the idea behind moby dick was like they think melville was getting at this thing where like the best you can do is just whatever kind of religion thing around,

just participate in it and just like live on the surface of it. Like whatever, this shit's weird. If you try to think about all of it too much, it blurs out into this white. That's just like totally unidentifiable. So he was like, you know,

so I'm like trying, I'm like, I think I could get into this and I'm like watching it. I'm like, this is just too fucking weird, man. I can't, I want to do so badly, but dude, it also also like so i'm watching the whole time like seeing like

you know little like i'm just waiting for their faces to show me some sign of like them just thinking something like fucked up or something i don't know so you know but we got into the wedding then there was a black white dynamic so there's like super christian dynamic and then there's like a dude i don't know if you've ever seen a bunch of black people watch white people do the chicken dance that was the funniest thing was the wedding fun was the party fun or like was that still you can't wash that off after that mess that stink is still on so the weird part was the super mega christianity like was on like it was it was possessed and repped by a lot of the white people and some of the black people.

And then there were some of the black people and some of the, well, I don't know. I don't know of many of the white people who were there who were like, that wasn't weird as fuck. I think I was the only white person there who were like, what the fuck was that? And then I was at a table with a decent amount of black people who were like, dude, that was so fucking weird. Oh, so it was the black people from Chicago? Yeah. Yeah. It was like my girlfriend's cousins so they were probably like what the fuck yeah but some of them even were like real into

that shit because their one cousin i started talking to about it and bernie kind of looked at me like dude chill because he was like he's all about that shit dude i was like oh my bad that's dude i almost the exact same thing i was in a hotel at the fucking reception at a table of people that i didn't know just sitting there like huh what the fuck and they were all like that was cool like shit like i would say something they'd be like whoa that's inappropriate yeah they shut me down pretty i got shut down pretty anytime i was like if i swore or some shit like that they were like well that was the weird thing i saw they were like fully so they did the chicken dance was the

funniest fucking thing in the world i was at it i was sitting at a table with black people watching the white people watching white people do a chicken dance and they were sincerely going like what is that matt what are they doing and like people were like getting up and leaving they were like so offended they were upset by the chicken dance they're like matt what is this it's weird i've been to like a white black wedding before and it dude i it's like through no fault of anyone's i don't think it devol been to a white-black wedding before, and it's like, through no fault of anyone's, I don't think, it devolves into a dance-off every single time. Nobody dances. Everyone gets in a circle,

and they just watch people dance, and it gets into this hyper-charged environment of like... It's competitive at some point. So, dude, it's the weirdest fucking thing. Dude, I was just watching it, and of course... How high were you? So it's the weirdest fucking thing it was dude i was just watching it and of course like how high were you so here's the other thing so here's the other layer on top of everything i'm the i'm definitely the highest person there yeah for sure so so i'm like i'm gonna because i'm like i'm gonna be called out of the dance floor with britney i'm

like this sucks i'm like so i'm like chugging red wine dude i'm drinking i'm trying to break the mental barrier of just being like whatever I'm not even going to think about this Which apparently was impossible So I started hitting my vape pen I was literally trying to escape I was trying to smoke my vape pen Like it was DMT I was outside just ripping this thing

Finally it all caught up with me And her grandmom This lady is like 80 years old She's like Matt do you dance And I'm like oh yeah I love dancing Do Matt, do you dance? And I'm like, oh, yeah, I love dancing. And she was like, do you want to dance with me? And I was like, no. I was like, no, not right now.

And everyone's like, what the fuck? You're not going to dance with our grandmom? I'm like, does she really want to dance? I'm like, give me a minute, man. Come on. People are like breaking my balls. Like, that's fucked up, man. You don't tell our grandmom you're not going to dance with her.

I'm like, all right. So then finally, like, hours go by, and her one aunt got me up, and we started dancing. Of course, dude, and I knew this was going to happen. I had to dance to a table of people

who were just watching me laughing, and I'm like, this fucking sucks. And then I went and got, I'm like, fuck this. I went and got her grandma. Did you grind with them? Well, the problem was

the grandma needed a cane, so I'm holding her hands, but she kept falling back, so I'm like, here, and I took her back. But I think I was so fucking drunk and stoned by this point, I think I was thrashing her around a little bit. You shook her around a little.

I think I shook her up a little too much. People were like, whoa, whoa, come on. That's enough. Yeah, man. And then I— You got drunk. I wasn't even that drunk. That wine was doing nothing to me, dude.

Totally, dude. The B.O.C. did nothing to me. I fucking got hammered. After that dude got Totally, dude. The B.O.C. did nothing to me. I fucking got hammered. After that dude got crushed, I honored his life. Only way you knew how. I chipped my tooth on a beer. Did you?

Yeah, you can't really see it. Front left. That's all you can do, dude. Yeah, I raised a glass too quick and chipped my tooth. Yeah, it was a fun night. So you jarred this lady, you shook her around.

Shook her around. It's a weird thing i was like getting yelled at by britney you're being too rough and i'm like i'm holding her up she's gonna fall over but i'm like she's looking at my face like how high are you and i'm like i'm not even high what are you talking about i literally couldn't move my face like i couldn't make a facial expression other than just like being awestruck just being like oh yeah man so then uh but yeah then i just watched the whole time it was just this like like her cousin was djing her cousin did a really good job was playing all these

really good songs but they had a preordained list that she had to play certain songs like dude it was it was i was watching this being like damn dude this is very like uh like a sociological study it's like black people start dancing like oh we're having a good time and like white people come out in a pack and like at one point they did an organized like practice dance number together

which I'm like that's kind of what the groomsmen yeah but like all of them they did an organized like dude it was like 14 people

they all go it's almost like a cult they're all in this church so they had time to like put together a four minute dance number and then it's like you're watching

like white dudes maybe I'm projecting this on them but I think or maybe a little on edge about dancing in front of black people which I'm slightly nervous dude obviously I'm over it now it was fun but I feel like because you are getting judged I'm at the table watching them

watch white people dance and I'm laughing it's hilarious to watch but then I'm like fuck now I have to go out there and i don't know when to go i don't know why you keep dancing i don't know when white people lost the ability this bothers me i have a very apollonian temperament dude i'm like a big world uh world joiner i can't help it dude it's just how i am so i'm like in my head i'm like dude the whole time i'm watching i'm like so stoned like what happened to white people dude why can't we dance and then i was just saying when we were watching that brony thing i was like why do people dance this What happened to white people, dude? Why can't we dance? That's what I was just saying when we were watching that Brony thing.

I was like, why do people dance this? What happened, dude? How do people dance this? I think it was at one point I was watching it. White people dance in 15-second bursts. You dance for two seconds and you go, ha-ha. You look at your friend in the eye, like, ha-ha. And you laugh.

And then you jump back into it. But it was something very Viking-like. A way white people would descend on the dance floor and start like fucking moving in these really short like short hard like stiff powerful movements that i was like i'm watching like dude this is kind of like weird and then they kind of intimidating berserkers they were berserkers they're going berserk and then you and then you'd watch like and then the black dudes would go out you know the black lady whatever they'd all go out and start dancing it was like like one her one cousin went out and danced like they kept doing that circle shit where they circle them, do the soul train line.

I'm like, this is crazy. But he fucking killed it for a straight minute and a half. And you could tell, killed the morale on the dance floor. Everyone kind of stopped. Everyone kind of stopped. It was just like, then they hit the chicken dance, dude, and it was over. The state of Texas came and repped the chicken dance. The chicken dance.

I was getting elbows from 360 degrees. Matt, what the hell? Matt, what is that? Matt, what are your people doing? They repped the chicken dance. The chicken dance. I was getting elbows from 360 degrees. Matt, what the hell? Matt, what is that? Matt, what are your people doing? They were doing the chicken dance. Pretty much. They were fucking elbowing you. That's how it starts.

Dude, the people were genuinely upset watching white people do the chicken dance, being like, what the fuck? That is an off-putting scene. I would have been upset as well. If I saw someone do the chicken dance, I'd be like, all right, these can't be our friends. upset as well. If I saw someone do the chicken dance I'd be like

alright these can't be our friends. If any of you are listening to this and do a fucking organized dance at your wedding not just the chicken dance

I'm talking about they kill the cupid shuffle fuck that too but if you do a fucking I got out of the cupid shuffle I was like no. If your groomsmen do a dance

or I mean bridesmaids I'll forgive because women have dog brains but men if you go do that fucking dance as a group you are gay

your friends are gay banished to hell you're saying you need to stop watching the league on fx or whatever you guys all jerk off to and get a life if you do a synchronized dance at you should you well that's the other thing viral clips are like kind of like you want to kind of go viral like the mother daughter dance what sucks about doing a viral dance is you end up having the fucking harlem shake on your fucking home video of your wedding no you do you do a viral craze that was popular for 30 days yeah just when you got married well that sucks that's true it's really weird but it used to be like you'd watch tv and you're like all right that's what people do at weddings i'm gonna do that now you watch weddings on the internet and you're like oh we have to have

like a surprise daughter like or the the fatherdaughter dance is like they start out slow dancing, and then they break into it. The DJ starts spinning the record. They obviously did that, dude. Oh, they did do that? Well, they did it during the mother-son dance. They broke into a little dance. Father-daughter was just a slow-mo. It was nice and easy.

Meat and potatoes dude nothing not showing off at all yeah but yeah it was dude it was one of the weirder experiences i've had and then dude so i'm walking around being like the bride and groomer young so i'm like bro god is the ultimate pimp because i got real into the mechanics of like the transaction of the bride while i was there and like watching all this stuff and i was like imagine back then like you want to fuck because they i'm pretty sure they're both virgins so it's like yeah which dude i'm telling you they were up there and they were like you could see that they wanted to fuck so bad which is another awkward thing that's nice they were like i mean it was and it was also kind of god isn't that's his god intended it matthew well come on

man i that's an ultimate pimp game it's like you want to fuck you got to pay so you have to pay the church as a human being to fuck or else you die and go to hell that's pimpin dude yeah and if you if you get to be like the ambassador of that and being like okay because all that was was a transit like dude you would get a daughter and you'd be like as soon as you got a daughter like all right as long as she's not a slut i'll make like 500 bucks off her. Yeah. At some point.

I just have to completely make sure she doesn't be a slut. And then some dude's going to come out who wants to come so bad, dude. So bad. And they're going to be like, you like my daughter? 500 bucks. And then the church gets a cut. And it's like, dude, that's like how empires were built. Yeah.

Every person in the world wanted to come. And if you come, you lose and you're in hell and like everyone hates you. I was, and again, I'm at the wedding and then Brittany's like, dance with me and I'm like,

Brittany, you have to understand I just can't dance right now. I'm too fucking, I'm too deep in the matrix right now. You couldn't dance with her? I mean, we did a little bit.

Dude, I danced with her grandma more than I danced with her. Really? Yeah, I danced with her grandma. She let me off the hook, dude. I sat there for the most part

and just chilled at the table. There's a lot of dudes who just sit there and they put their foot down and they don't dance. Yeah, that danced with my grandmama. She let me off the hook, dude. I sat there for the most part and just chilled at the table. There's a lot of dudes who just sit there and they put their foot down and they don't dance. Yeah, that's what I do. I know. And then I make runs to the free bar. Yep. Get fogged up. And hit the dance floor.

No dance floor. Never. Might walk through. Give everybody a fucking wave. Be like, yeah, I'm here. And then I sit back down or stand. I usually find the dads. Usually find the cool dads. Yeah. Talk to them. That's another thing I'm bad at. then I sit back down or stand. I usually find the dads. I usually find the cool dads.

Yeah. Talk to them. That's another thing I'm bad at. Talk shit on all the other families. That's pretty tight. Yeah. Well, I hate to do that because I was sitting there yesterday

and she's talking to a bunch of girls and I see a dude and I'm like, are we making an agreement to talk to each other now all night so neither of us feel awkward? Oh, yeah, that's how that works. Yeah, but I start thinking about it.

Don't read into it. Yeah, I'm like, this is weird. I'm but it was i mean it was fun i did i did have fun the food was good you know i i do i like to dance the food like barbecue bro so good it was buffet style barbecue pork and chicken green beans barbie sauce mashed taters dude oh my god big old plate i would have put a fucking hurtin on that and i came home and home and ordered people pizza, dude. So I ordered, I ordered like. What's people pizza? I ordered a couple people pizza. I ordered like, we had like four people in our room.

So. Oh, you ordered people pizza. I ordered the people in my room pizza. So you ordered pizza. Yeah. That's how that. Sorry. I ordered people pizza.

That's how people say that. Well, I ordered myself a pizza and everyone came. So I was like, fuck, I got some extra pie. You ordered some pizzas. I ordered some Zaz, dude. You ordered people pizza. I ordered people pizza. From, it was Mellow Mushroom, dude.

Mellow Mushroom pizza. What's Mellow Mushroom? It was this pizza some Zaz, dude. You ordered people pizza? I ordered people pizza. It was Mellow Mushroom, dude. Mellow Mushroom pizza. What's Mellow Mushroom? There's this pizza place down there, dude. It was like, obviously in reference to hallucinogenic mushrooms. So like everywhere,

there's big statues of like chill-ass mushroom people like, whoa. And you go in, you're like, I got a pizza. I like what you did here with the mushrooms everywhere.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was fun. That was good, too. Was it gluten-free pizza? I got a gluten-free for myself. They sell gluten-free pizza in Alabama? That's what I was saying. I was like, too. Was it gluten-free pizza? I got a gluten-free for myself. They sell gluten-free pizza in Alabama? That's what I was saying. I was like, Brittany, I'm basically going to go into ketosis down here because there is nothing.

Dude, all they had down there was just food for me. I ate nonstop. There was like a Puerto Rican sandwich place I ate at. Fantastic. Alabama surprised me, dude. Really? A lot of tasty. I was like trying to half-talk Brittany and then go.

I was like, we should come back. She's like, what the fuck are you going to come back here for? I'm like, there's a lot of good places for me. Yeah. Nothing like a good interracial couple in Montgomery, Alabama. That was another thing, dude. That's a good place for you guys. We went out to fucking lunch.

I forgot where we were. Because we flew down and went right down there. We went out to lunch. Dude, we pulled up and an old white lady just literally looked at us and went like, ugh. Visibly. Visibly went, ugh. I mean, you guys are throwing it in their face a little dude what do you want to do well come on man just don't go to montgomery

you're really fucking spiking the football in the end zone you're like oh you guys are blown up churches or whatever nah dude we gotta this is my girlfriend we fuck lady that was so fucking funny man i pulled I pulled up and Brittany's like, did you see that? I'm like, maybe she's... I'm like, she definitely looked at you. I was like, fuck, here we go. Food was... We went in and the waitress was really nice, but everyone in there was on eggshells, dude.

It was bizarre. I was like, damn, dude. I think there are a lot of black people in that town, though. There are, dude. Yeah. There are. So, I mean, they're not like... But they keep it...

I think they keep it pretty... Segregated. Kind of, yeah. I mean, that's like... But you can tell. That was the other thing, too. When I was at the wedding, I was watching... There was such an effort to...

I don't know, man. To kind of try to de-racialize the situation. I was watching people talk to each other. And especially... I feel like white people want to not be racist. It's just like... Yeah. If you try to engage other other people you just come off as

really weird as a replacement so it's like i was watching the guy being like couldn't have been a better family to join in this is just the best and it's like so i'm like well there's some better families yeah there's like couldn't be a better but it's all wait did they separate the tables because the tables had to be mostly black mostly white so what they did here's what they did probably looked like a checkerboard now now. Now I know why they did this. They didn't assign seating. Because Bernie's like, why the fuck wouldn't they assign seating? They should have assigned seating.

Well, dude. Because if you leave it up to the people, typically it gets segregated. I mean, it obviously did. Yeah. But, well, not me. I was fucking. Why don't you pat yourself on the back? Why don't you pat yourself on the back a little more, man?

Dude, it was interesting on so many levels, dude. I was like, dude, the religious level, there's a weird racial level. And then there's like everything, like the normal shit. You know when you're there and there's another family at a wedding? Obviously, this family fucking sucks. You instantly kind of hate them. What a bunch of fucking losers. Why did they suck?

I'm just saying whenever I go to a wedding for my family I know but in this particular time did you see a family that sucked no but there's always a tension so that was like between the two families

yeah there was like that tension became was also I think my family the Gillis's are the family that sucks really because I don't think we ever

there's never that it's always just like let's see who can get the most fucked up yeah but it's also you're looking at the other family like what a bunch of pussies. Yeah, but I'm saying,

I think we must be the... We're not... My family is the same thing. Yeah. We suck. We're like a... Yeah, you guys are shitty people, but while you're there,

you're just like, whoa. Like, while everyone's trying to do like... Let's get crazy. Everyone's trying to do the speech, we're like, shut up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. I told you when I did my cousin's wedding,

when I was like, may your love live forever, like Frank's dead tooth. No one laughed. My aunt was like, Jesus. Oh, that's so funny. Yeah, it was funny watching any of the perceived slights kind of took on. I was trying to talk to Brittany about this at the wedding,

and I was just so high, like, whoa, Brittany. People say it's not, but it is coming together. is coming together just gonna be awkward for a really long time he's like shut up oh man like okay i'll pull the car around no problem yeah i'm gonna go drive whoa i'm in a spaceship dude the pizza place was fucking two minutes from our hotel i got lost and ended up on the highway and i was like, that was horrible. Old families in the hotel, like, where's Matt at? And I was just like, I'll be right there.

But yeah, it was fun. So nice. That was my day. It was just a day and a night. Nice. Dude, I'm telling you,

there's something to it. God's fucking God is God's pimp. It has been pimping. If you buy into it, that's the most airtight hustle in the world. Death getting pussy. But now people don't believe in it, and it's just like, that was weird. You are the only one for me.

Yeah, there's always that weird, like, real sexual undertone, too, with all, like, the Christian shit, where they're like, and tonight you'll become one. It's like, all right, man. Oh, the one I went to dad the bride's dad was the fucking pastor and he was saying shit like that like he was saying like sexuals and he's like have a lot of kids like be very fruit she's behold your fruitful bride and i was like ew dude that's your daughter stop talking about her fruits do you think like a super religious dude is like catching a beat and like just thinks about how fruitful his daughter's going to be and then it's like, that's the devil, and stops jerking off?

He probably lets the devil finish. And then afterwards, he's like, damn it. Damn it, again, again. Damn it, I cussed. The devil's in me. That was funny, too. As soon as you get the jizz out, the devil's out of you. For sure.

The devil jizzes the devil. That's what the devil is, yeah. Jizzes the devil. It was funny watching the like, the Christians, like, listen to, like, popular,

they're, like, Travis Scott came on, they were, like, singing along, knew all the words, and I was just like,

how do you guys, how do you guys fucking put these together? Yeah. Yeah, it was weird. I don't think they're thinking that much, though. Obviously not.

Obviously, there's not a lot of thought going into what the fuck they're doing. I know this song. Yeah, it was weird, man. It was like, Christians going I know this song. Yeah, it was weird, man. It was like... Christian's going into

sicko mode. Yeah, it was literally... Yeah, it was weird, dude. They knew all the words and it was... It was like any other wedding I've ever been to, you know,

just the weird racial undertone, Christian undertone, and then, like, dude, I was there for the shit talk sesh afterwards, and the back, like, after the telly, dude,

everyone's like, do you see this one? This person said this, and it was just like, it was wild. I don't remember. I don't ever make it to the shit talk sesh.

Really? Yeah. I couldn't get it. I'm usually by the end of the end of the reception. I'm out. There was no liquor. That was the thing.

It was just beer and wine. So I'm like cash bar. Nah, it was surprising me. Why? Figured it would be cash bar. Those Christians, they're like, we're not going to pay for you to imbibe. I was thinking that.

But no, they just drank Miller Lights, BOC, some Blood of Christ. Yeah, they drank some Lachey's, Blood of Christ, white wine. The fact they didn't have any alcohol, I think that was they didn't want any spirits. Yeah. That was definitely a hard Christian move. Those dudes can't have liquor. Yeah. They're just the devil, dude.

Think of like the grown men like sitting outside being like, one guy's hammered and he's just like, I just don't know if I believe anymore. He's like, come on, brother. We all suffer with that. Dude, I told you I went to a wedding one time where the groom went outside and cried for like half the fucking party. He went outside and he was like, I don't know. Oh, fuck.

I'd be outside like, what the fuck? What was he crying about? Getting married? He like, yeah, he just was having, he didn't know of Oh, fuck. I'd be outside like, what the fuck? What was he crying about? Getting married? He like, yeah, he just was having, he didn't know of like, he was having like second thoughts. He had been nervous the whole time. He didn't want to be the center of attention. So he like went outside and cried the entire, I was like going, back then I was smoking joints pretty religiously.

So I was like outside smoking joints. I was watching this guy cry and I was, and he was like in recovery. So he couldn't like drink or anything. And he was like, I don't know what to do. I was just watching him. I was watching him outside. How'd you know him? Was it like...

It was my ex-wife's friend's friend, some bullshit. Some Ginzo wedding, dude. When you go to your girl's friend's wedding, it's always corny. Girl's friends suck. Yeah, man. Typically. Yeah. I went to two with my ex, and 0 for 2 on those weddings.

Both weird Christian weddings. Both, like, again, at the table, I'd say something, and everybody would be like, whoa, man. Yeah, it's easy. I'd be like, I'd suck that groom's dad's dick. They're like, whoa, man. I thought it was a wedding. You guys can't have fun. No, we're having fun, dude.

So what'd you do besides go to the dirt track? I told you, on Friday. Watch a man die? had a nice show down in baltimore sick fucking show it was really fun where uh some bar umar khan runs a show in baltimore it was fucking sick man tight perfect sold out packed room tight it's fucking fun and then uh yeah friday kyla and beezer came down, went to the racetrack. They saw the dude die. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Went to the racetrack with little Jay Agnew action. We saw Jay Bird.

What's good, boy? Then we went out, went downtown, went down to Harrisburg, bro. It was party time. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's where I chipped my tooth. Things got a little wild. Oh, you didn't chip it at the track?

No, I chipped it afterwards. Yeah, it was ugly. It's now your home. Not to please. Then me, Beezer, and Kylo went and smoked a blunt on the side of my parents' house. I love how much weed gets smoked at your parents' house. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then the next day, my dad was like, I heard you come in at 4.30, and then you ran

back down the steps and went out the front door. What the hell are you doing? I was like, I was going outside to smoke weed. What did he say? He was like, well. He didn't know what to say. It was great. I think my dad got stoned recently.

Hit him with a straight answer. Hit the geezers with an absolute. He was like, what the hell were you doing out there? I was like, I was smoking a blunt on the side of the house, Phil. Well. You're 31. He's like, yeah. Exactly. Yeah, baby. It was was great and i laid in my parents backyard

for a while by myself that must have been nice 5 a.m just laying there looking at the stars where's bees where's the bees and kai bees and kylo went in and then beezer walked out and saw me like staring at a tree it was like what the hell you doing dude i was like just taking a look at the land man fuck yeah and he was, you're just staring at one tree. I was like, shit. I didn't go inside. It was bedtime then, man. Yeah, I think my dad got stoned, man.

Which is really weird. I got him on the CBDs and then hooked him up with a little step-up tincture. And he just, I got texts, he texted me about Saturday Night Live. Oh, and then you texted me about Saturday Night Live.

No, no, this was before that. Oh, the McCuskers were texting Saturday Night Live. No, I did text you. I did watch some of it last night. you texted me about Saturday Night Live no no this was before that the Cuskers were texting Saturday Night Live no this was I did text you I did watch some of it last night he texted me the one

where they put the dog the helmet on the dog and it talks about like Trump being sick it was like from a year and a half ago yeah and he's just like

he just sends me this and he's like this is so funny I'm like yeah this is pretty funny I remember this and I'm like this is tight

and he's like what are you doing I'm like just chilling and he's like yeah I'm smoking a cigar your mom's in bed just me I'm out here by myself and I'm like this is tight and he's like what are you doing I'm like just chilling and he's like yeah I'm smoking a cigar your mom's in bed just me I'm out here by myself

and I'm like this dude never texts me this guy fucking has to be high he's fucked up has to be stoned and does he drink no so he just starts texting me

all this weird he's like yeah pretty nice I'm out here by myself smoking a cigar and I'm like dude what are you doing I kept to my phone

dudes love bragging about smoking cigars though if you smoke a cigar you have to have someone see it or tell someone. True. Otherwise, there's no point to smoking a cigar. I saw a guy catching one at like 7.30 when I flew out in the morning. Like a TSA worker just chomping a fucking like six-inch cigar.

Unlit? No, he was smoking it. Yeah, he fucking had it in his mouth. I'm like, dude, you're about to start your day like this. You're going to bother everybody around you. Cigars suck, bro. I don't like them. I try.

I try. Every once in a while, I try. Especially at weddings. Usually, I take a break, and it's like, oh, well, I'm going to have to be out here for 45 minutes to smoke this fucking thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, if I'm drunk enough.

It's like a two-day. You're signing up for, like, shit breath for, like, two days. Yeah, and I inhale. Do you? Yeah, I always do, dude. Come on, bro. You're like the owner of the fucking Monstars. You're like the owner of the Monstars, dude.

Chomp down an L cigar. Oh, man. So your dad got high. Saturday Night Live, that's because I think Michael Che is the head writer. Really? I think. So it's a little less woke. They did the, what the fuck did they do?

They did the, it's like a Jeopardy, but like who can play the the role of and they're like naming different ethnicities and like like what it was a black jeopardy there wasn't black jeopardy it was just it was keenan yeah it's black okay so i guess the round was like who can you play yeah in a thing and there's a white guy being like a racist um an overweight dad and that's it they're like correct dude it was pretty funny and they're uh the black jeopardy with tom hanks is his art what was that tom hanks is like a white trash trump supporter really and they're like do you vote he's like hell no the whole game's rigged hell yeah like god damn man oh i saw that i saw everything but in that same episode like black jeopardy is brought to you by sprite sprite how did we become the black drink It was pretty great Oh man

Yeah it was fun man I was Again Just immersed dude In a whole other culture I got Too fucked up On Friday

And then Saturday Mom's birthday party Just Your mammy's birthday party Was Saturday Almost nothing worse Than being hung over

At a family party Yeah I was getting judged by everybody. What were they saying? They're like, you look like shit. Like, every single person was like, you look like shit. Ugh. You look horrible.

I'm like, all right, great. It's good to be here. That sucks. Just slogging through this fucking party. That sucks. You just want to lay down. There's kids screaming. Yeah, it's pretty horrible, dude.

I've done that. I haven't been that hung over in a while. That was a rough one. That was at 5 a.m. You should have some fucking respect, dude. I'm smoking a blunt at 5 a.m. Somebody pretty horrible dude. I haven't been that hungover in a while. That was a rough one That was a five you shouldn't like have some fucking respect smoking a blunt if somebody died, dude True guy got like I might even hung over dude. I'm morning I'm just mourning the guy who got smashed by a car Yeah, baby fucking assholes you should have ran you should have ran to your room like fuck you guys slam the door you guys Someone died in the fucking dirt track you guys are here

We think about your birthday Someone died in the fucking dirt track You guys are here fucking around How can you celebrate What are you thinking about It's your birthday Fuck that dude Yeah it was That was wild man Everybody ran over to that part of the track Where the crash was You could just see smoke coming up

It was like oh man And then people were like Started walking away from the wreck Like crying and like No boos What do you mean Boo Oh no nobody booed the...

Maybe him, now that he's a ghost. He was like, ooh! Finally! The racetrack is very spooky! This is fucking spooky. It's got to be haunted over there. How many bodies do we have? There's got to be a ton of bodies.

It's what, one a year? Yeah, probably. Shit. Yeah. Jesus. You got to come with me. I do. It's so me it's so stupid well i'm gonna wait a year this cornfield like in the back behind us the sun was like going down behind the cornfield like right when we were there any shortcuts this is fucking sick so any shortcuts it's not like mario

cart that's what that guy tried to take he tried to hit he tried to hit the jump and someone put a banana there so he ended up crushing a guy dude someone put a banana there. Someone put an old banana in the way, dude. Someone put a fake box. Dude, what do you think about all the deaths right now, the shootings? Oh, man. You think they're for real? Oh, yeah. You think so? Yeah, I think they're real.

You think so? I think saying otherwise is not a good look for us. Not at all. Yeah. It's just a lot. I want to know, when did this start, dude? Shootings? We've been had guns.

I'm not turning this into an anti-takeaway gun argument, but we had guns, dude. So when? I think in 2004, an assault rifle ban got lifted in the United States. Really? I think. And people started shooting. Why weren't people? Wouldn't people have been going in with muskets and fucking lighting up the town?

When did this start? I believe it's pharmaceuticals. I think so too. I think without a doubt. That's fucked. Yeah. Because it's like, they're happy now. They're like one a week, one a week, one a week.

They're all like dudes that were, you know, 90s kids that were given Ritalin and shit their whole lives. It fucks your brain chemistry up Taking all those anti-depressants Anti-anxiety things Well it was on the books making people Like a sliver of people More suicidal And that's been established

You're saying there's no link between Homicidality or whatever And what sucks about it is Even having that discussion People are like you're making an excuse for white men. White terrorism. And it's like, dude, we're not making an excuse for it. It's just let's figure out why.

Unless you believe the answer is that white men are inherently evil. Then in that case, we can stop searching for a problem. No, there's people who are saying it's literally Trump. Trump has emboldened dormant shooters who are like, I need to trump has like emboldened there's like dormant shooters who are like i need to go to the mall and light people up but like trump finally came and they're like now i go now it's time yeah well that's what the sandy hook guy said he said he loved uh the apprentice he was a big trump guy even back then sandy hook sandy hook was like in his manifesto he's like the apprentice fucking rules it's fucking hilarious what about that's not true what about the okay i was like i was trying to prove that i was like in his manifesto. He was like, the apprentice fucking rules. That's fucking hilarious.

What about the... No, that's not true. What about the... Oh, okay. I was like... I was trying to prove that shootings were... I was like, I didn't think you did. They preceded Trump Daddy.

Yeah, that's true. For a second, I was like, I mean, I guess these guys probably write some wild shit. Well, it's weird to... I bet Trump doesn't help. Shooters? I don't know. Dude, I don't... I'm just trying to figure out like, when do these dudes start doing...

Like, if this was just, like, an organic response to just, like, some sort of political ideology, it's just... It's weird. That's what everyone says. They're like, oh, this is terrorism. He's not calling it terrorism.

And it's like, whatever. Yeah, sure, you can call it terrorism, but, like, dude. Yeah. Is there a collective cause, and are all of these shooters citing a similar thing? I think a lot of them are.

Are being like... I think a lot of them are like 4chan type. Really? Yeah. I mean, Christchurch and then this El Paso guy. Both of them. Those two. Jeez.

They were fired up on some 4chan. They were on that fucking... They were on that billion spud tip. Well, being a conspiracy theorist now is recognized as being a FBI terrorist gang. If you identify as, like, if you start talking Q, they basically put a thing in, basically, they're going to treat that like I'm, like, being, like, ISIS fucking rules. Well, if people from Q and all that shit, or QAnon and like all that shit are shooting up places,

I think they should look into it. Yeah, but... Keep an eye on those fucking chat boards. But if everyone in QAnon's like, dude, this is a clear fucking conspiracy. There's no... They're not telling anyone. The last thing they're doing

is telling people to go shoot people up. They're like, they keep setting up mass shootings. So the last thing a hardcore conspiracy theorist QAnon is going to do yeah it's going to verify the government narrative that like crazed white supremacists are shooting people up yeah but i think crazed white supremacists are shooting people you think there's lurkers who are on the q thing who are just like sorry guys can't help it uh i don't know i think those guys i mean for sure for sure there's dudes

who fucking are freaking out so wait you think that these guys are not on there? No, I just want to... No, there's definitely dudes who are rolling up and fucking... Who've had enough. Yeah. And they're just being like, fuck it, dude. But my thing is, is there a difference between a dude... I guess not.

If you're like on the... If you love the internet that much, where you're like, I'm going to light up a mall versus... See, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if it is the internet that much, where you're like, I'm going to light up a mall versus... See, I don't know. I don't know if it is the same thing. What do you mean? Versus ISIS. Oh, versus ISIS?

Western Civilizations. I mean, was Timothy McVeigh a terrorist? I don't know. You've got to watch the thing. I didn't watch the documentary, I can't say. But yeah, he definitely blew up a building. But he told people to get out. I mean, that's different, dude. If you're going to be he definitely blew up a building. But he told people to get out. I mean, that's different, dude.

If you're going to be like, all right, I'm going to tell people to get out. He would use explosives to blow up a federal building. Yeah, but... As a protest against the government. That's a terrorist act. For sure. But it's also like, if you're telling people, if you're like, terrorism where like, I'm going to kill everybody in my way, I don't give a fuck.

That's one brand of terrorism. Being like, hey guys, a little Robin Hood terrorism. Like, hey guys, don't be in this building. I'm going to blow it the my way. I don't give a fuck. That's one brand of terrorism, being like, hey, guys. A little Robin Hood terrorism. Hey, guys, don't be in this building. I'm going to blow it the fuck up. A little Robin Hood? You think McVeigh was more of a Robin Hood type? If you tell people to get out, that's at least a shred. He blew up a daycare.

Did he? Yeah. Who didn't tell him to get out? Maybe the four-year-olds didn't get that memo. He was like, hey, kids. Yeah, he blew up a daycare. So who did he tell to leave? I don't know.

Okay. So he's a bad boy. I didn't know that. I didn't know that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's pretty bad. He blew up a fucking daycare. Yeah, he blew up a daycare. So who did he tell to leave? I don't know. Okay. So he's a bad boy. I didn't know that. I didn't know that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's pretty bad. He blew up a fucking daycare. Yeah, bro.

Yeah, and these guys shooting this thing up, even if they're on, yeah, you got to look into it. I'm not saying fucking bug everybody that's on fucking a not, like looking up conspiracy theories because it's fun. Yeah. Because it is kind of fun. It is fun. And some of them are true. are true that's the other thing yeah but the whole you know what is weird i will say this billy this is fucking weird yeah billy called me well i probably called him but we were talking and he was like the tape of the clintons is going to surface anytime something bad happens with the clintons there's a shooting before it. He told me that like three days ago.

Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that was a little like, oh, Billy's on to something here. But I don't think that has anything to do with it. I think there's a real fucking issue with dudes. I think it's pharmaceuticals again. And I think the reason it's mostly white guys is because they're usually the ones with access to like, you know, they're from suburban homes that they were taken to the doctor as a young kid because they had mental.

They were probably like dickheads in school. So they got loaded up with pills. Yeah. I think that's why it's a white guy issue. True. Because we're the only ones fucking injecting our kids with so much shit. Not true now. Not true now.

Exactly. That's why I. You're pumping little black. That's why years ago I prophesied that there would be some black shooters headed through the pipes. Yeah. Although there were three black shooters in Harrisburg this weekend. What? No one's chatting about them.

Oh, that's, yeah. Yeah, there were more. Yeah. That was just kind of running and gunning. That was just classic. That's just running and gunning. That's just a different type of shooter. Yeah, don't even get me started on, dude, the different...

People do separate that. They're like, it's not an act of terror. This is an act of... And it's like okay well It's pretty fucked up Either way I hear you But I was watching fucking CNN about it

And they were just like Will Donald Trump call it white terrorism It's like dude shut up Yeah man Why are you guys making this Democrats Republicans Both sides It's fucking nuts

That's my problem They always do that They always do that shit And this is where This is my beef This is my little steak in the sand. It's like, why are we examining this through a political lens? We should be like, okay, we have people more and more who are freaking the fuck out to the point where they're just shooting at malls.

And we're just like, ah, shit. And another one happens. Goddamn GOP. Dude, it's fucking crazy. Goddamn it, my political enemies keep doing this. Yeah, dude, it's fucking... Goddamn GOP. Dude, it's fucking crazy. Dude, think of the... Goddamn it, my political enemies keep doing this. Yeah, dude, it's fucking bizarre, man. That does, like... That's the thing that freaks me out about it.

I'm like, this is your guys' content point of... This is your beef being like... Yeah. Well, you know, the fact that he... I mean, it's one thing that people are coming and shooting up the mall with, like... I don't know. I mean, I guess some of them have a clear agenda.

What was the DC sniper on? I don't know. I mean, I guess some of them have a clear agenda. So what was the DC sniper on? I don't know. Exactly. A lot of the, a lot of these dudes to me, at least I don't, I don't dig in. I'm going to start digging into these actually,

but a lot of them to me are just like, dude's fucking shooting stuff up. I don't, I don't get my hands on the manifesto. That's kind of what, uh, the CNN thing was interesting. Cause there was an author that wrote like a Columbine,

a book about Columbine and then a book about, uh, Parkland. Andland and he was like on air he was like these guys are just dipshits he's like they're not writing political manifestos yeah they're scribbling down gibberish and then shooting things up there's no while everyone was like this is if these were muslims we'd be calling it terrorism it's like shut up i don't need to make it racist now. Yeah. It's like, it's already a fucking horrific, I don't know. I mean, obviously there's truth to that, but shut up. No, I can see that.

Say it once. Let's not spend a whole episode on this. I mean, they do call McVeigh domestic terrorists. Yeah. So, I don't know. Or that would be, that's the inverse logic, though, of being like, white guy, shot people, obviously terrorism is like, well, you gotta give it a second. Like, if a fucking Saudi Arabian dude shoots people, you'd be like, terrorist. And if terrorism is like well you got to give it a second like if a fucking saudi arabian dude shoots people you keep like terrorist and if like

actually he wasn't you're like ah shit sorry yeah so you know whatever but either way that was to me i'm like dude i need to know what i would love to like follow the lineage of mass shooters yeah because i i it's like dude guns have been around i like i don't have you i would love to know if that happens in history dude just started like rolling around or it's like boom boom boom boom i guess every now and again so you get a sick dog who would go through like a wild west town have to be put down yeah you get like the bell tower guy in texas that was in like the 60s 70s he went he won ham yeah he went a little wild did he really got from the bell tower at the university. Started sniping people.

Started wrecking people. Okay, so what was his deal? I think he got hit in the head a lot. I think he had PTSD. Okay. He was a wild boy. There's a lot of those. I mean, that's kind of the game you got.

There was two this weekend. Yeah. There's a lot. I think 42 people got killed this weekend. Really? Yeah. In both shootings. Yeah, man.

That's where I get a little... I don't want to get watched by the fucking FBI, but I'm like, dude, there was two of these this weekend? And it's like... I mean, I'm going to have to dig into it. I just want to know, what's the central source? This isn't like a false flag thing. I don't think it's a false flag thing, just want to know, what's the central source? This isn't like a false flag thing. I don't think it's a false flag thing, but it's like, what's the central source?

Is it centralized? What is 4chan's ideology, and what about it would be like, I'm going to shoot people? It's just retarded people latching on to something. It's a lot like terrorism. It's like retarded guys latch on to Islam, and then they're like, oh, I need to do this. Yeah, but a lot of, again, a lot of the 4chan people are super, like, conspiracy theorists.

They're all joking and fucking around, and a lot of the conspiracy theorists and shit, but then guys are like, yeah, here's my manifesto. If I kill a bunch of people, they're going to see it, and I'm going to, you know. I'd have to go on. Yeah, I guess so. I'll have to put a pause on that, because I don't know.

I'm not going to say it's total conspiracy theory but it's like dude look man they're making it so if you even think about something like that you're all you're all of a sudden shunned that's what i don't like to be like there's going to be a building thing where people who question the operation of the government are terrorists it's like yeah that's insane i see that i'm like well you can't just you can't just call it that because then it's like now it's free season yeah well i think there's a glaring difference between questioning the operation of the government and these conspiracy theories that are like obama had children in the white house you know yeah for sure i think that's where it gets a little hillary clinton cut off a mask and put it on. Well, that was dude. I read an article about how now we're like,

people are so afraid of getting like manipulated by the government. And now like, we're up to like make our own narratives up with the internet and like all the different topics. And like the wheels are just coming off, dude, because we're just left now rather than having people trying to like at least hurt us into like making purchases and like voting a certain way now the

wheels are off we're like we're all in charge of it and it's just like left to all of our own crazy nonsense and it's like now it's like dude we live in a world right now where it's like people are like kind of being like hillary clinton definitely wears kids faces and then there's like the other side of that is that like everyone the nazis are here is uprising and it's like dude this is fucking crazy butterly sent me this video it's. And it's like, dude, this is fucking crazy. Butterly sent me this video. It's so funny. It was like the, from the socialist meeting.

This, this lady's on, she's complaining about something, but everybody that's like, uh, this is a point of privilege, point of privilege here. I'm a little hard of hearing and I'm very hypersensitive. So everybody here, could you please stop with the chit chat? Okay. And then the Asian lady who's running the thing is like, okay guys, could you be quiet? And this dude's like,

point of privilege, point of personal privilege. Could you please stop using pronouns or gender specific pronouns, please? The whole thing, they're all like snapping and waving their hands. Dude,

it is nuts. Yeah. And that's, that's a whole, that's the other side, weird little subculture where they're trying to get things to go. And dude, I watched that. That's a whole thing where you have to have some sort of affliction or even perceived affliction through race in order for your words to mean anything.

So the meaning of what you say doesn't mean anything. Otherwise, how you present yourself. And the more you could tap into a victim thing, people were like, well, that's right. The way they were all raising their hands was by screaming point of personal privilege what's that i have no fucking idea what that was and they're like okay comrade go ahead he's like i could you please stop using gender specific pronouns please everyone's like yes yes they all wave their hands and shit so this is what i this is and this is my beef. My beef isn't to, you know, be like, obviously,

dude, I'm watching people so drown in propaganda that it just gets worse and worse. And now there's like more and more shootings. But again, it's like, and this is where you're, I'm tittering on the deep end, but it's like, do I think the United States,

the mechanism it is, would ever stage a shooting? Do I think the people could do that? It's like, I mean, dude, they assassinated JFK. And, like, that's pretty well known that they did that. So it's like, I don't know, dude. It depends on how. But, again, it's also like, I watch the politicians in the debates.

I'm like, these are just dorks, dude. They're not that smart. Like, they think that they're putting together, like, the. But then again, if they've had hundreds of years to put it together, it's like, who knows? Who knows? I think you know. The government didn't set that up.

No, I think people are now really losing their minds and going off. But again, it's like, maybe they throw one in? I don't know, dude. Who the fuck knows? I don't think. I think it's very... You're not allowed to think that anymore. I'm not saying that's? Who the fuck knows? I don't think. I think it's very... You're not allowed to think that anymore. I'm not saying that's why you're not. Even if you were allowed, I think it's very

safe to say that these... For sure. It is for sure safe to say. Yeah. Definitely safe. What would they have to gain by this? Taking people's guns away? Yeah, it's like... I think they would come up with a new plan. They've tried school shooting and public shooting 238 times this year. True. And it still hasn't worked. True. I guess people are going to come up with a new plan. They've tried school shooting and public shooting 238 times this year.

True. And it still hasn't worked. True. I think they're going to come up with something else. That would be kind of annoying if you're like, dude, I got a fucking

awesome plan. Bro, the public's going to be outraged. We're going to shoot 30 kindergartners. Don't tell anyone, but we're doing that. And then it goes off.

And people believe Alex Jones. You're like, fuck! Everyone's like, they're not touching my guns. What the fuck fuck how the fuck are these people this evil i mean i knew i was evil that's gotta be infuriating like dude please the guy's like please i cannot stage another school shooting like shut up yeah the votes are at stake and the 9-11 the guys who you know put together 9-11 they didn't need to do that.

They could have just been like, yo, we're invading Iraq. Fuck yeah. Everyone would be like, hell yeah. No, people were way against it. They were like, no fucking way. Evading Iraq? Yeah. When?

They were trying to go over there forever, and everyone was like, no, we do not want to go. They were coming off the Vietnam War. So they did like Georgia. No, we already did Desert Storm. Oh, they did the Gulf War and all that shit. They already did that. Yeah, but that was like, they didn't even do anything. That was to defend Kuwait. The sentiment around before 9-11 was like, no, you don't want to go to war.

I think it was. They just had Desert Storm. They were just there. Well, that was like a fake victory. Yeah, but no, to get there, everyone was like, USA. Yeah. So you're wrong about that. I don't know, dude.

No, I know you are. There was polls that said it was like the United States was not about going over to Iraq. Pre-911? Yeah. There were polls that were like, no, they were just there. I could have sworn people didn't want to go over there. They were there like seven years before that. I mean, maybe they didn't want to go back again.

They were just there. I watched a thing. They said like the Gulf War was kind of like everyone was so against going to war after vietnam they did the gulf war and that was like a fake victory that got morale up again people like yeah dude we are the fucking best i watched a documentary that you know that's all i'm going off of again could be wrong i don't know was it like a 9-11 was a conspiracy documentary not at all it was just kind of it was was just talking about how terrorism came about in the Middle East,

like how that spread. And they were saying, there's a lot of people who were like, dude, we do not need to go over there. And then 9-11 happened and pretty much unanimously

everyone was like, yeah, let's fucking roll. Yeah. Yeah, I know. You're right. They can just go do that. Well, they could have done what they did to get into Iraq

and just be like, hey, he's got weapons of mass destruction. We're going to go kill him. Yeah, we're going to do that. They wouldn't even need to tell us. Yeah. That's the other thing, too.

They don't need to fake 9-11. Worst comes to worst. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. But they sank Lusitania. They didn't sink it. They knew about it. Exactly.

That's what I'm saying. They sent it out and they're like, eh. Well, it had arms on it. Yeah. So they were trying to sneak arms into England. Yeah, disguised with a bunch of people. Yeah. So you're talking about a government body who's going to sacrifice civilian life for a political maneuver.

I don't think they knew the Lusitania was going to get hit. They tried to hide those weapons as, like, they were like, this is just a civilian transport. Still, dude, imagine if you put, like, 10 kilos of coke in your mom's car and you're like dude i didn't know you're gonna get pulled over i just figured you could drive it for me well my bad what if your friend needed 10 kilos of coke to fight the germans then dump you the pussy and be like all right we're in it we're gonna get in you know what i mean yeah so that was like yeah then again if you have like billions of dollars at stake you're like yeah we'll help you guys out. Just don't tell anyone. Yes. Yeah. We want you to win.

Dude. All I'm saying, like I said, all I'm saying is I don't know. I'm not pretending to be the source of like definitely this, definitely that. Now I'm watching it like, dude, like imagine from the time you were a little kid, the political narrative, what was going on? Like they want to lower taxes. They want to raise taxes. Now it's like into this thing where it's like they're a fucking Nazi. You worship of sat satanic cannibalistic

cabal that's still like a bit of a fringe but like dude that stuff's starting to bleed into like more and more people and it's like what the i just watched that uh that showtime show on roger ailes yeah fox news check it out that's like that's like where also the all this how fox news started you're saying yeah all this shit about how news is now just entertainment and you need to rile people up constantly to make it watchable it's like that's where we're at and it started in like 97 with like fox news yeah and shit's just been out of control well it's also with q the q stuff is such an easy i think there are people who are smart enough in washington dc because they're pulling literal internet metadata. So they're like, how do I reach...

Because they're like, geezers are dying, so you constantly need to come up with new strategy to lock people into your party. So if they're doing the... There's think tanks being like, how are you going to get 20 to 30-year-old dudes to start back into the GOP? The dads were GOP people.

We want to get young white dudes back into the GOP. I don't think that'sP people. We want to get, like, young white dudes back into the GOP. I don't think that's hard. I think they used Q to do that. I think Q... I think Q's an inside job now. For sure. Dude, all you need... I think all this stuff

is political propaganda. The two-party system is the enemy. That's my ultimate... Yeah. That's my ultimate point. It always gets lost because whenever I navigate either side,

I get lost in the fucking, you know, whatever party I'm talking about. I'm looking at the fucking... The two-party system in the fucking you know whatever party i'm talking about i'm looking at the fucking the two-party system is the you know the technotron from ninja turtles just walking around so it's like i think q is the gop being like all right we you know we can get like they don't trust like young 23 year olds a lot of them don't trust the media there's there's other polls that do say like 75 of people don't believe what they read in the media or like at least don't trust it even though every person i talked to was like i read it in the newspaper therefore it's true but in order to do that

they're like what if we put together a thing where like obviously we're political insiders with a lot of power and obviously we kind of know what's going to be in the newspaper two weeks beforehand so what if we like send little pictures out and convince them that like we're the inside track trying to save people? So you have people saving people from Nazis, and you have this inside coup. Bro, if you believe that there's all-powerful things out there, every single thing is going to be a conspiracy. Not all-powerful. Yeah, but every single thing.

Now Q is in on it? Q is some form of conspiracy. They've sent pictures of people months before a person got arrested. So I think there's people who know people in the media. This isn't even a conspiracy. The real conspiracy is that it's a fucking military Q who's about to arrest Hillary Clinton for eating kids. This is talking about political theory.

No, I know what you're saying. The people pushing all that crazy shit have an agenda're getting like pictures of people like of like prominent political figures getting on a private flight so it's like who where are you getting those pictures from so again i think this could be a a way to kind of steer voters in to just like come up with this wild dude that's a wild fucking thing that there's like a secret online person who's dropping breadcrumbs of people and then like yeah well it's it doesn't he he gets stuff wrong constantly sometimes but like even to get those pictures i don't know about the pictures there's like there's some and again you have to get into it but it is a bit like you're saying there's so many things and it's a

bit horoscopical that you can kind of like analyze it but there if you look into it you will find people think well this thing happened and this was like two days before so some of them line up a little like i said not saying the person's right all the time and if it's like if it was spot on every single time it would get blown they the other party would be who the fuck is dishing out the goods dude this is too much you would get fucked for espionage so you think he's getting it wrong on purpose sometimes to keep the heat off i don't know i don't it could this could be a team dude of little people trying to steer people over just to get people to vote republican yeah so there's a lot of money there's billions of dollars at stake that's the other thing too and these are billion like dude if you navigate any sort of like help system phone system any company they're set up in a way that's like

clearly run by sociopaths so like they try to fuck you out of insurance they'll try to fuck you out of like your life insurance like that's built into the business. So the political machine that's beholden to that business is somehow people like, I was hanging in a coffee shop and I want these boys. I was down there. It's like, I don't know. I think it's somewhere between all of it. I think there's some people who are doing a couple. People pull little capers here and there.

There's a bunch of people who are idiots and shit just unfolds. But there are people, I think, who are not successfully all the time, like people say, but there's stuff happening that I think is totally kind of a scam. And I think Q is a way to get people to vote. It was a way to pull young voters back into the...

So you think the GOP backed Q? Yes. They were like, hey, how can we reach these kids? Let's create a conspiracy theory board. Yes. They were like, hey, how can we reach these kids? Let's create a conspiracy theory board. Yes. Okay. It's possible.

I think they looked at internet metadata and were like, well, they don't believe any of the shit in newspapers, but you know what they do believe? Conspiracy theories. Which is funny, because that's kind of what happened to Alex Jones,

where he was a conspiracy theory guy, and then they were like, he's controlled by the CIA. Oh, yeah. They say he's... Well, Trump talks to Alex Jones. Trump's been like like, he's controlled by the CIA. Oh, yeah. They say he's. Well, Trump talks to Alex Jones. Trump's been like, I'm a fan of the show. You're great.

He was. Yeah. And he stopped talking. I think he cut ties. Yeah. I think he I think he complimented him post Sandy Hook, though. Like, I want to say, I think he did. He talked to him during the election.

Whatever. What you're doing is important. He was talking to him like during the election, which was way after he claimed Sandy Hook was fake. Yes. I'm saying. Yeah. So. But he could always be like didn't know i knew the people sandy hook great people yeah sorry but it's funny that all these like conspiracy boards or like conspiracy people end up everyone i mean dude everyone that reads it or listens to it is like wait you're a conspiracy oh they're all a shill alex jones is a shill for the zionists they all that's like the ultimate within the conspiracy. But now Q's a shill.

A lot of people, I think Q is a shill. There was people calling this out way back when. I know, it's just funny that no matter what, if you're a conspiracy theory person, if you write conspiracy theories. What is the opposite, though? You're going to end up eventually being accused of being a conspiracy yourself.

For sure, for sure. That's what's funny. But what is the opposite? Being like, we live in an ordered society where these are just people and they're setting it up and everything's operating within the bounds of a like there's no that's not the opposite the opposite of hillary clinton cutting a nine-year-old's face off and wearing it isn't everything's working is exactly how it should no but a lot of people who so a lot of people though obviously yeah that sounds crazy but if you even question a little bit of stuff they just shut that down because they don't want to be allied with conspiracy theory whatsoever.

So they're like, that's all ridiculous. That's my whole point where it's like, yeah, that shit, there's some wild shit in there. And if you're walking around crossing your fingers, like, here it comes. It's like, dude, don't hold your breath. Yeah. And also, if you're a kid who's by yourself all the time, you're on a ton of fucking antidepressants or anti-anxiety things, and you're on a message board every night that's like, the reptiles are taking over. You know, you get an AR-15 and go to Walmart.

That's true. It's wild. Yeah, I mean, there's a whole other sub-world of that guy's life, what else is going on in that world. But it's also like, dude, when you're watching your YouTubes and all your political information's coming from like one second clips of the person owning the other person you're just like yes they're right again yes yes yes and you're just watching this being like fuck yeah you will get pissed off some people get really pissed when they watch that so i don't think it's as conspiratorial as it is just totally profit driven like that's the algorithm people keep watching it so we for sure for sure for sure like i don't think it's as evil for sure netflix is netflix is questionable yeah but i

bet they're the numbers is all they're after true so like maybe if it starts to fail they'll stop putting liberal shit out but until then they're gonna keep doing it i think they're stopping i think it's stopping a lot i was watching i was watching snl and i was going but then again you get into the and this is where the conspiracy stuff does get annoying because it's almost an endless thing of like well it doesn't even matter at this point they get they're just purely trying to propagandize and it's like no there's people trying to make money off of like a lot of the production well i also i remember i remember when i was studying propaganda in school and i was just like oh everything's propaganda like as soon as i heard about it i was like oh in school and I was just like, oh, everything's propaganda.

As soon as I heard about it, I was like, oh, fuck. I didn't know that. Literally every single thing is propaganda then? Yeah, in terms of advertising. Everything. It's like where does the line... Nick Jr. was made to sell toys to little kids. The purpose of Nick Jr. is from an advertising think tank

to get... The whole purpose is it's called engage a nag. Yeah. We make sure the little kid goes nags the mom. Nags the mom. So like that's the that's where Nick Jr. is made. So it's like that's kind of sinister to turn a kid into like a weird little

like mom, mom. The mom might not have enough money and the kids like me. The kid starts crying just because like it wants some dumb fucking Play-Doh, and that's kind of an evil thing to do. So it's like, how evil does the... What can someone live with? If you were doing a business where you're like, I'm going to get kids to cry and have their parents like,

that's fucking crazy. Yeah, I'm going to create a product so good that people cry to get it. It's not even that good. It's like, I'm going to create a product and target it to a way, and a four-year-old, the way I'm going to use experts in child psychology to craft a message that's so

undeniable to a kid that if it doesn't get it, it'll be such a little miserable dickhead that his parents will go, fuck it, and use their money and buy this thing to shut their kid up. That's an evil enterprise. It's capitalism, baby. I mean, that's one version. Yeah, that's part of kid up that's an evil enterprise it's capitalism baby whoa i mean that's one version yeah that's part of it yeah that's fucking evil dude yeah it's so it's like and if you don't think that's those nickelodeon guys are pedophiles i mean they got

rounded up who did they got rolled did they really yeah they got rolled up saw a meme that was a bunch of the nickelodeon guys pedophiles i mean that's true, too. If you choose to get in. They're around all those hot kids on all that. Yeah, imagine if I'm being... Dude, child stars. Child stars are fucking hot. If you're a pedo around a child star, you must be like, oh, my God.

Yeah. Dude, I watched the fucking Michael Jackson movie, Jackson 5. That movie's fucking crazy, dude. I don't know about it. It's pretty tight. Wait, is that the old one? It's the old one.

Where they get their ass beat by their dad and shit? Joe Jackson, dude. The funniest part of it is him beating his kid's ass. I don't know about it. It's pretty tight. Wait, is that the old one? It's the old one. Where they get their ass beat by their dad and shit? Joe Jackson, dude. The funniest part of it is him beating his kid's ass. And even when they're super successful, they have a mansion in LA. Someone puts a towel in the pool. And he comes home. He's like, where are the boys?

Where are the boys? And the lady's like, come on. Or Catherine, whatever her name is. Like, Joe, relax. He's like, this is between me and the boy. He just wanted to continue beating his kids. Damn. Even when they were like a global sensation. I got to beat these fucking kids.

There's a towel in the pool. Dude, I looked him up. He looks like the Babadook in real life. Really? Yeah, he's a scary looking dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You see him now? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Scary looking dude. They're all scary. They're all very scary. Someone jumped Joe Jackson at one point. What? Someone came. He was coming out of a gig with the boys. Someone beat the fuck out of him and took all their equipment.

He was like, oh. Someone hit him with a switch. Someone hit him with a switch. Someone came out of the switch. Someone beat his fucking ass. Damn. But yeah, dude, that's my problem is now it's set up to where like I'm in between just two total extremes, dude. And it's advantageous to kind of like, you know... You can cater to either one of them that you want.

I'm out that game, baby. I heard that. I dabbled for a while into all this shit. What, in catering to like... Just all the like... I don't know, all the politics. All the fucking Reddit and shit. I can't do it.

What do you mean by that? I just can't even be involved in politics. For sure. I can't. I don't know anything. I'm dumb. I'm dumb. I'm out. My thing is the people who are purporting to study this stuff closely

get so sucked up on one of the sides that it's just kind of like, all right, dude, you're going to sit here and tell me all the good news? Like Ben Shapiro's show, it's just like, here's all the things that's sick to be a Republican about. And it's just like, you're not at any point in your argument, are you like, ah, well, this is one kind of weird part well guess what his market is yeah republicans i know he's gonna go on and be like hey you guys are great the other side's bad that's what all these people are doing every single time no matter what the network is too much of an apollonian dude it's my it's my

downfall maybe but uh sure all of these are doing the same thing. Fox News, everybody. For sure. They're like, our side's good, other side's bad. If a shooting happens, our side's good. Yeah. Look at what the other side's, even the Republicans are like, or Fox News is like, they're trying to take your guns. True.

Anytime there's a shooting. Like, instead of, you know, praying about it, they're making it political and trying to take your guns. And the other side's like, Trump won't call it white terrorism. Yeah. Trump's a white terrorist. Yeah, but meanwhile, China's setting up

like a social credit system. Meanwhile, China's got the social credit system. China's like, we're the media. Don't worry about the fucking two-party system. There's one party.

If you're not on our party, you're getting your head fucking cut off. Now you're giving me the heebie-jeebies, dude. And we're controlling the entire world while the United States

rips itself apart. Tell me a people's republic. By its own doing. By its own doing. We're doing this to ourselves. There's no... I know that everybody's like Russia, all these other things. It's us.

Damn, dude. It's the United States killing itself. Dude, that's literally exactly what the article in The Atlantic said, that it turned into like... The Atlantic, what The Atlantic does is like shreds... It'll like build up arguments to talk about stuff on the left for the most part. They like mix stuff in here and there. But this guy wrote an article

and he's just shredding like Trump supporters and da-da-da-da-da-da. And then at like the last page is just him being like, and also like this applies to the left and he'll like sneak that, he'll sneak a whole thing

and basically about that how we're just now left to our own crazy devices to interpret just like all these mixed messages and all you can do is either jump aboard to one of them and just live in a little vacuum,

or you just become like, you just have no fucking clue what's going on. That's where I live. Tune out, baby. I live in a world that's just like, totally have no idea what's going on. Yeah, I made a mistake of watching the news yesterday. Damn.

Not doing that again. That shit sucked. It bothers me. Yeah. Because it's not, it's so fucking transparent. Whatever channel you're watching, it's like, Jesus Christ. Yeah, it sucks. Could they not? Yeah, could they just fucking watch watch that roger ailes show

on showtime it's wild about fox news yeah hell yeah it's them just being like we're here to make an entertainment channel like this is this is entertainment it's like it was just like vice for like 45 year old white dudes exactly it Exactly. It really was. It really was. And there's, you know, it's just to incite, like you, like we talked about before, when it's like it's just two political parties making their voting base angry enough to go vote. That's what our country is. That's so fucking evil, dude. Over and over again on both sides, they're just like, we got to vote.

Otherwise, the communists are coming. We got to vote. Otherwise, you know. Otherwise, I'm gay. The Nazis are coming. The Nazis versus communists. That's where we are in America. I know.

Fucking retards. Holy shit, man. It's bad. It's bad news. Yang, man. I think Yang will pull us out of it, dude. I think the fucking Chinaman's coming. He's going to save us.

Yeah. Well, it's funny. I watch some of the debates and you watch Yang being like, he's like, oh, all these politicians are up here with like their pre-recorded stuff. And like, I'm not like that at all. Like, I didn't even wear a tie today. And all everyone talks about that. Don't wear a tie. And like, I promise I didn't, all these politicians are up here with like, they're pre-recorded stuff and like, I'm not like that at all. Like, I didn't even wear a tie today and all everyone talks about

that I don't wear a tie and like, I promise I didn't even think about not wearing a tie and like, I'm just like, way more chill than everyone. It's like,

dude. Yang is not chill. I've been watching him too. I mean, dude, I'll take a G. I'm strictly voting for him for selfish reasons.

I'm trying to get a G out of Yang. I don't care. You're not going to be able to vote for him. I don't care what happens. You're going to have to write the Yang man in. You think so? He's not going to be on the ballot. I don't care what happens. You're going to have to write the Yang man in. You think so? He's not going to be on the ballot. True.

I got to call my mom again and have her check what political party I'm in. You're in the pub, dude. I have never voted. Yeah, I'm not going to vote. My mom looked it up. She's like, you're in the Green Party? I was like, I don't know.

You're in the Green Party? I'm in the Green Party, yeah. You can look it up? I don't think you can look it up. My mom Googled it, dude. She got mad at me. I was like, Mom, I've never voted. You can Google people's political parties?

You can Google, yeah. You can look up. I think you need your information. I think I'm a Republican, then. She got mad at me. I was like, Mom, I've never voted. You can Google people's political parties? You can Google, yeah. I think you need your information. I think I'm a Republican. You're a pub? I think I'm a Republican. See, one time I was walking. I think I was 16 or 18, I guess. And I renewed my license.

You're like, what? It's like, what political party are you? We were at the Harrisburg DOT. And they were just like, Republican. They gave me your license out. You're definitely a Republican, dude. Sorry. Yeah, I don't know. They gave you your license out. Here you go, bud. You're definitely a Republican, dude. Sorry. Yeah, I don't know.

I'm not going to vote. And you're gay if you do. That's all I'm talking about. No, I mean, if you care about it, go vote. If you know what you're talking about and you think you're right. Yeah. But chances are you don't know shit and don't. Did you get into all this stuff about, well, this is going to be a, and again, I would

love to know if this is not the case, but you hear about the stuff with baltimore how they have like i mean this was over the course of 10 years but apparently it's like 2.3 billion dollars and they're like where'd it go bro and i i don't again i don't know about baltimore philly where i basically around here dude they got the obama promise zone they got like i think it was either hundreds of millions or a bill. They got a lot of money from the federal government. Dude, if you look around Mantua and West Philly,

it's like, I mean, if someone gave someone a billion dollars and was like, where is it, dude? You don't have any like humongous buildings

or like new murals. Okay. Expensive murals, dude. Okay. You're talking nice murals out here. Dude, where did he go? That's and that's a point

where it's like, yeah, that's a real problem, dude. Yeah. Because again, I've tasted people who work around government money you want to know how fucking propagandized my dad is what do you do i was like phil i got a showdown in baltimore thursday he's like place is a shithole i'm like uh are you saying that right now because trump said he's like shane let me tell you something. Baltimore is a dump, okay? I'm like, yeah, I know. I know. We agree. It is shitty. But would you say that you're bringing that up right now

because Trump just said that? And he's like, Shane, I'm not... Nothing to do with that. It's got nothing to do... Ed must have pissed him off so bad. Never, ever admit. It's so fun. Dude, trying to argue with my dad he just instantly changes the song he's a good arguer as far as very slippery i'll be like yes or no

would you say simple yes or no answer would you say that you are saying baltimore's a shithole because trump just said that yes or no only yes or no no shane let me tell you something he's basically a dude on the stage he's unbelievable again i asked you if you were Yes or no? Only yes or no. No. Shane, let me tell you something. He just will not answer. He's basically a dude on the stage. He's unbelievable. Again, I asked you if you would support a 70% tax rate. I'll tell you what. I think rich people need to pay money.

No, no, no. Just answer the question yes or no. Not having it. Shane. Dude. What are you doing? Calling someone. Really?

Is that his new thing now? Yeah, he called me. I told him I smoked dope. Yeah, you told him you were smoking a blunt. I told him I smoked a blunt this was before that though so really this was yeah we gotta get the geezers on weed in this country i really think the geezers need to be on weed in this country dude just fucking just a little bit remember the first time i got high and watched the news i was like 19 and i i like my someone put i think my brother

put the news on i was stoned and I watched it and went like, well, this reminds me of the homeroom show. And I was like, oh man. Channel one? Yeah, exactly.

Anderson Cooper, dude. He was on channel one. Was he really? He was a channel one boy. Coop was on the homeroom show? Anderson Coop started on the homeroom show. Shit.

Yeah, bro. Now he's gay. Yeah, for sure. Well, CIA turned him gay. Yeah,

CIA made it. They were like, how can we make you perfect? You're too white. Obviously, yeah. Say I'm gay. Dye your hair gray. He's like. Yeah, for sure. Well, CIA turned him gay. Yeah, CIA made it. They were like, how can we make you perfect? You're too white. Obviously, yeah. Say I'm gay. Dye your hair gray. He's like, no.

Yeah. But yeah, man, that's one of the... Well, it's everybody's... It's like geezers watch the news like they're watching a sports game. Like, this is my team. Sure. I'm the home team. True.

The away team's evil. It's kind of nice, though. Yeah, it's funny. Dude, I would watch... dude i would watch my dad would watch like state of the unions like he was watching a football game he would watch like obama say shit and be like you fucking liar maybe drank him and be like look at this asshole lying that's now he watches trump stuff he's like i'll tell you what shane not that bad you know what i'm saying he's not that bad i think he's got the country's best interests in mind that's like phil this guy's a fucking moron donald trump is a fucking psycho like look i don't

care if i don't care but like let's let's be adults about this yeah let's call it like what it is donald trump is not a good person he's not not that you need a good person to be a leader that's true sometimes it gang is con gangas was doing great for my god i do need a good person to be a leader. That's true. Sometimes it helps. Genghis Khan? Genghis was doing great for Mondo. I kind of do need a sociopath now that I think of it. If you want to have a good empire. As soon as you're not a sociopath and they're like, dude, you just bombed us. Oh, fuck. I'm so sorry.

My bad. How many people died? Like 100. You're like, fuck. You're like, I quit. We got to shut the military down. Yeah. If you're just kind of like, well.

You need a retard running the country. You need an angry, powerful retard. For sure. Because that's what you're up against. I know. The whole world is led by angry retards. True. And if your country is weak, like the only way Canada can afford to be gay with Trudeau

is because we have a giant retard. True. Like our retard is so fucking powerful that neighboring countries can be like... They can have a lesser, nicer retard. That's what Western Europe, you know, that's what they have. They know the fucking sassy daddies. That's what Western Europe, you know, that's what they have. They know the fucking

sassy daddies, like, if someone touches them, we're going out. That's, yeah, if anyone touches any of those countries,

we have to bomb them by default. Yeah. We got, we got fucked. Europe, dude, I'm telling you,

England, we revolted halfway through. They're like, you know what, man, fuck this, whatever, we'll just control them

some other way. And then all of a sudden, they're like, now if someone bombs England, America drops a nuke on them or something, we're like, England can be bombs England, America drops a nuke on them or something. We're like, England can be like, hey guys, you owe us one. I don't know.

I bet if. Someone bombed England, we'd have to. I bet if something happened to some of these countries, Trump is vindictive enough to be like, remember when you called me fat? Oh. Remember when you guys would call me fat? Remember the G20? Not very funny now.

Sand the best. Deleted. Imagine he's like, sand the best. You have to sand the best and20? Not very funny now. Sand the best. Deleted. Imagine you're like, sand the best. You have to sand the best and then we'll blow that mic. That's true. I mean, good Lord.

Imagine if there was World War III and our FDR was fucking Trump. That'd be so embarrassing. Jesus Christ. All the history books, just pictures of that guy just like, we did it. We won.

We're the best. This is something I really do get into and I wonder about if they because when you follow any of these world issues full scale overpopulation is like a looming serious problem and i and this is like this is like jones talks about breakaway civilization shit yeah i do wonder if people just like people who have lots and lots of money are like dude all these problems go away if we just kill like 5 billion people.

So they could engage World War III, hit the bunks, live it out, and then just be like, come out like, you know, have their ancestors come out into like totally blank slate. But I don't know if, you know, nuclear weapons. How's Hiroshima holding up? No, I doubt great. Like, I wonder if they dropped a bomb on Hiroshima just to see like how long it takes for you to go back there and you can chill. Because that was pretty uncalled for. I mean, they were being bad boys, dude.

No, that was called for. Bomb. Yeah, that was. Didn't they bomb another city, too? Nagasaki. They hit like a day later. You think they did one and were like, do it again? Dude, do it again.

Well, we got another one. Fuck it. They need to get the point. So people live in Nagasaki now, right? Probably. So can you, people live in Nagasaki now, right? Uh, probably. So, 50 years.

If you, if you were to be like, look, we got places we can live. We're going to start World War III. Let's fucking. Yeah, but they'll all be dead in 50 years. People that would control it.

So maybe they're waiting for the medical technology. Oh, the transhumanism and shit. Yeah. Well, that's what they're saying. What's his face was in the, uh,

I mean, who's the fucking pedophile? Epstein. Apparently that guy, this was the New York Times. Oh, well, that's why they're in the uh i mean who's the fucking pedophile epstein apparently that guy this was the new york time well that's why they're taking the faces off those kids and hillary was wearing them and dancing well they said epstein well they're saying that epstein was possibly dude well apparently they say hillary clinton like drinks like virgin's bloods she does face off but apparently the real end there's people in silicon valley that do the uh blood transfusion

with young people so i would imagine you know top politicians get in a little bit of young blood. Get a little young blood in your vein. Young blood? What's up, young blood? I think they get a little young blood, dude. They said Epstein apparently was like, he was going to get out, while he was out on bail,

whatever he was, he was planning on impregnating, like, scores of women. He was going, that was like something he was going to... To live forever, dude. To basically, like, yeah, like... To ensure a fucking...

His, like, progeny. Yeah. So there are, like, billionaires who get into some weird fucking shit like that so you could i could see them being like we need to separate we need to set the world have you ever hung out with someone who was like great super super rich yeah they're not that chill the guy i know is pretty chill were they an entertainer no okay how rich you talking very rich okay hunters Okay. Hunters and Mills? Yeah. Goldman Sachs. Okay. Like on the board at Goldman Sachs.

Really? Pure Illuminati, dude. Elite bull, though. Does he have a bunker? No. He might. He might. He's got a house up in the Hamptons. He's got a bill?

Yeah. So you got a billy? No, I don't think. Okay. In fact, definitely not. I never met a billionaire. You never met a billionaire? I'm trying to think.

No, definitely not. Definitely not. I don't think I ever a billionaire? I'm trying to think. No, definitely not. Definitely not. I don't think I ever will. Don't think I'll ever see one, dude. What do you think you're looking at, bro? True. What do you think you're staring at right now, bro? Billion dollar baby, dude.

Excuse me. I got four fucking digits, bro. Billion dollar baby. My bank account. I don't know, dude. If Yang, man, if we get away from the weird personality stuff from presidents, I think we could have a shot at just being like, all right, we're going to collect a bunch of tax money.

You guys, if you want to smoke some weed or whatever weird shit you want to do, do that. Try to make sure no one comes and blows us up. I think we've got to wait until 2024. I think we're locked into the Trump zone. You think Trump's going to do it? I think we're locked in until 2024. People are liking Gabbard, dude. I don't even know who that is.

Gabbard crushed Kamala Harris, basically, being like, dude, you locked up 1,500 people for smoking weed, then you're laughing about smoking weed on The Breakfast Club, and everyone at the rally is like, ooh. Kind of crushed Kamala. That's so good. Yeah, and it's all bullshit.

It's like, I was a prosecutor. Then they're saying now the Russians gave Tulsi Gabbard all that information on Kamala Harris. And well, if you if you if your political opponent nails you, you have also the Trump card of just being like, yeah, that was the Russians. Yeah. They're colluding. Dude, that's a game. And these people aren't that smart.

So that's all they have to say. Then Biden's people like, why wasn't Charlamagne on the show? Like, why didn't anyone attack Biden? It's like because he's fucking clearly senile dude nobody thinks that guy's gonna win dude there's videos of him with anita hill testimony where he's like grilling her bad really yeah dude he's like a super need a hill thing yeah dude oh young biden's up there being like slut fuck you yeah yeah so you were being a slut right not in those words but he was pretty brutal there's like a tape of it so it's like dude and by fuck you. So you were being a slut, right? Not in those words, but he was pretty brutal. There's like a tape of it. So it's like, dude, anytime you see him up,

I've watched clips of him on the debates. He's clearly losing his mind. Retarded. That guy is, they threw him in there on a wing in a prayer and being like, people know who this guy is. They're probably like, dude, don't talk. It's going to have to be Bernie, dude. He said that.

They're not even going to let Bernie do it. He's not going to win. Yeah, it's going to have to be Elizabeth Warren. Dude, I... It's going to be Warren versus Trump, dude. He said that. I don't think Bernie... They're not even going to let Bernie do it. He's not going to win. He kissed me. Yeah, it's going to have to be Elizabeth Warren. Dude, I... It's going to be Warren versus Trump daddy. Well, Gabbard's going to... And not Warren. No, yeah, it'll be Elizabeth Warren.

He's going to crush her. Gabbard... He's going to crush any of these people. Yeah, but Gabbard's... This is Spud. This is a fair point. Fudd said Gabbard's like a hot, young chick within her fertile years, kind of. And he was...

Well, this is his point. He said she was fertile? He's talking in biological terms he said a lot of old men don't like another man like being nasty to you but then again that wouldn't really just that wouldn't really make sense because then aoc gets kind of crushed pretty hard no one really yeah everyone's pretty happy you can flatten that theory although fair theory i like it but yeah man i don't know she's suing google right now because she's like dude dude, I'm like, I'm like the number third. I, I, she, her, I, somehow they got some sort of like research stuff and found out that

she was being searched a lot, but yet not popping up in search results. Dude, if you Google like gang compilation from the, the, uh, like compilation of Yang highlights from the, the, the base, you have to find his username and search his uploaded videos. He doesn't come up. Gabbert now is starting to come up a little bit, but she's suing Google for that. Really? Yeah, dude. Google's, yeah, man.

But I think Google's more or less just, I don't know. Dude, who knows? Again, look, my whole thing is I can't take official stances on this because, again, I'm Rick Moranis, dude. I'm fucking, I'm lost in it. I'm in the swamp where i'm just like dude what the fuck is going on yeah so we'll see yeah we shall see i'm more worried about stand up yeah i mean that's that's the way no that's nothing dude that's honestly that's the way to go i mean i follow this stuff a little but like i mean all these people suck ass and once yeah

whatever dude i mean how much i can do about it there's nothing you can't do it you ever call your congressman no call your congressman and someone answers are like uh yeah okay it's not even them they're just like yeah it's yeah we're their assistant what okay cool thanks bye stop letting people get guns okay great okay sure thanks do you have a billion dollars do you have a hundred are you offering a million dollars because if so then we'll listen to you yeah

but no is this just a phone call no well the only thing you can do is like get like a million people standing somewhere together and then they're like

ah fuck because that's the main thing like at any point you could just if a million people like fuck this you could scale the white house and just totally kill everybody

but it's like you know they're not gonna no one's gonna do that because it's like I don't want to be a terrorist I don't want to die i don't be a terrorist i'm not a terrorist guy i'm not a fucking terrorist or fucking evil dude terrorists are gay yeah but it's like dude everyone it's just you know i don't know i don't think it's gonna stop

it's not it's not like people it's i think it i'm not dude i i just talked about it for two hours i think it's a spinning wheel dude to be like and then, and then if we do this, and we do this, and then we do this, it's like... I agree. It's like... I agree. Yeah. True that.

I can't... Again, when we started, that's all I talked about was, like, gender politics, all this shit. I can't... I literally stopped doing that. Yeah? Because it's just... And now, of course, you going to school

fucking brings you right back into it. And with stand-upup it was really fucking annoying because that's all that it was still kind of how is it now people stop that i don't deal with it yeah so it's good what about the people's material is it still like uh i'm starting to see a bit of a flip back to just whatever's funny yeah people trying to see people making fun of liberals you know really yeah but we were only seeing it at a local level of just pussies everybody here was just jockeying to be cool nobody here was trying to make a career out of stand-up i disagree i think a lot of people were actually in their head thinking that they were and

that's how you oh okay well i think they were everybody like it's not very realistic sure yeah but i think dude if you were to tap those guys and make it's your time they wouldn't be like i can't they'd be like all right everyone i think most people doing stand-up are deluded in some sense thinking like it's going to happen for me all i have to do is continue like it's always hard for everybody it's rare to meet somebody in stand-up that's like no i just do this for fun it It's very rare. It's rare. Everybody, like, I remember the first, like, couple times I wrote a set, I wrote it like I was in a theater. That's when I was writing stand-up, and I was like,

pause for a, you know, pause here for a giant applause break. Keep going. Then I got on stage, and I was like, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh one laughed. Oh, shit. Yeah, but... Yeah, all that shit, all that social justice shit, I don't see it in New York at all. Good.

Not really. I mean... I don't know, I was up there doing... Actually, definitely not. I was up there doing mics. You run into it in Brooklyn mics and mics. Mics, you see it. Yeah.

Once you're out of open mics and into just who's good, that shit's irrelevant. Yeah, because I was... When you're in open mics, you're jockeying to have somebody like you, somebody that runs the mic like you. Chances are it's a chick that runs the mic.

So you get on stage, you're like, women are powerful. Huh, was that good? Yeah. You know? Start calling you a friend of the room, and then all of a sudden you're like... Yeah, dude.

Now you date one of them, then she accuses you of something. Yeah, dude. It's fucking wild. That's the path of an open mic-er. Yeah, dude. It's fucking wild. That's the path of an open mic-er. Yeah, man. That's the typical life cycle. That could be related to one of like, if you're on your quest, dude, that's like a Medusa

head siren thing to get sucked into. Local SJW. Yeah, man. That's something easy. Turn you into stone. We're like, no, these are all my friends. We all love each other. Oh, no.

Now I'm 35 and I still live here and I'm still doing that. Fuck. Yeah, dude. Yeah. It's like, my girlfriend and i are in an open relationship what's going on this is weird i don't like this yeah i'm telling you that's well there was a there was some quote i forgot who said it they're like culture is a uh intelligence test and if you like fully abide by it you fail so if you like if you're in the surrounding you're like yeah this is perfect and you're like okay well yeah you just tapped out mentally. Congratulations. But it's also, that's kind of what you're supposed to do on some level.

Sorry, bro. I've been following all of the, dude, that book, All Things Shining is the best. Really? It takes you through the whole thought process of like Homer, the Greeks, I talked about all that. Then they talk about how when, so the hebrews were like all right dude you got to fucking be there's 10 laws 10 commandments as long as you don't break these you're cool no matter what and then jc came through and was like well you got to give money to the homeless exactly well his whole thing was like if you want to don't kill don't kill me if you want to fuck

someone's wife and all you think about is fucking their wife, they're like, that's kind of fucked up. That's bad. No, no, no. As long as you don't fuck their wife. And then Jesus is basically being like, no, no, no. Don't forget about the law. It's all about how you feel inside. So that's what.

Yeah. There's a start of postmodernism, dude. It opened up art. Now it's like, no, you can interpret it yourself. Like, you know what I mean? So now it's like that spun off through thousands of years. And here we are, dude. What's that called?

In Catholicism, I was taught, like, if you even think a sin, you're doing it. Yeah. It's like, geez, what a horrible sin of intent or something. Why would you ever even say that? That was... Obviously, you think of the worst shit possible. But that was the JC revolution, because it was like you had these guys who just held themselves on these rules and had everything structured, and so it's like, all right, follow

these rules, everything will stay exactly the same, and JC was just like, yeah, but you also can be kind of a nice guy. Like, if I heal somebody's blind, you know, whatever the story was, they were basically like, well, you did that, but it was Sunday, and you broke the law. And he was like, yeah, but this guy can walk. I think that was like a symbolic parable. But he'd be like, yeah, but this guy can walk. And you're crying about what?

It was Sunday, dude. Fuck you. That's why they're like, all right, we're going to kill this guy. Cut this guy. We're going to kill this guy. Like, fuck this. I wonder if, like, while he was talking to a guy guy was like smiling and nodding like oh yeah just in his head he's like i'm gonna fucking kill this motherfucker i'm allowed to kill this guy we're gonna kill him yeah dude for sure dude that's uh but they walk

through that and all the way to like then it got to the point where like nietzsche stuff where it's like you now it's like religion's like religion's dead and you have to fully come up with your own code and now here we are and like people being like in charge of their own like I don't trust the media and like I know

what's going on it's like you don't have any idea no one has any idea besides what's going on in their life and they don't have any idea about that

for the most part so my thing's like dude just fucking wake up go to work try to be nice to everybody and you know just fucking relax

try not to watch the fucking relax try not to watch the news yeah try not to get in a political argument with your friends yeah dude if you can if you can help it that shit's useless sucks yeah so either way but yeah so that was like that but i'm a big solution head dude so my head it's like what is the what is the way out of this you're gonna get there's gonna be a soundbite of you doing all the things that you are you're like alex jones with that shit where he's like i'm a fighter i'm a texan well i'm a man i'm a solution dude i mean i'm not gonna say i'm apollonian again dude but like i am you're very apollonian i mean it is what it is dude i'm an infp it's like one percent of the world it's no big deal but like either way you're special

one percent you believe you're special 1% of the population you believe you're special I have high arches that's 1% of the population green eyes 1% of the population very rare I'm not bragging

no no I don't think you're bragging I think it's a nice thing to believe I didn't want to be I think it's nice for humans to believe that they're special like that well statistically I am but I don't want to brag about it

high arches that's a very low percentage green eyes low percentage INFP even lower but again I'd rather be an everyman. I'd rather be a common man.

That, I think, is your biggest dilemma. What? You just wish you were a fucking everyman, but instead you're just this unicorn. I'm trying to dissolve into the fucking fabric of society, bro. You wish you were a fucking donkey, but instead you're a fucking stallion. You're a unicorn, dude.

You wish you were in the mud like a dirty mule. Or I'm just a dirty mule with a head head, I'm like with like a head injury. I think that's what it is. I'm a unicorn. I think it could be one of those. I read about five pages of Blood Meridian this week. That was pretty good.

Really? Yeah, we're getting there. At this rate, I'll finish it in 2038. Nah, you'll rip through it. I know, I know. It'll hook into you eventually. I actually just,

I refinished, I'm putting out a second edition of my book. Nice. Fixed all the typos. Keep the typos in, bro. No, no, no, no. Well, that's, they'll my book. Nice. Fixed all the typos. Keep the typos in, bro. No, no, no, no. Well, they'll be in first edition.

Fixed all the typos, made the font bigger, so a little easier on the eyes. Nice. Yeah, that font was minuscule. Well, I wanted to make it as cheap as possible for people. So I thought I was hooking people up by making it super cheap. Every other book on Amazon is $10. I make literally $0.50 on every book. Damn.

You know, whatever. I've made $13 from Kindle royalties since I fucking did it. Three years of my life, no big deal. Yes. I don't even care about that. I know you don't. I like people to read it and be like, that's awesome, which people have been saying, but I'm going through it and I'm like, dude, there are so many fucking titles.

I'm embarrassed. I mean, this is horrible. So I fixed it. Tweaked the ending, too. I finally, finally came through and was like. Second edition is a different ending now? Slightly. It ends a similar.

It ends the same for the most part, but there's a final climax of one of the people that I feel like I just got to the end of it. It was like my 10th time writing it. I'm like, this is just when it has to be. Finally figured it out. It came full circle. I was like, oh, I'm excited about that. Nice.

And then put it out. So I'm done. Overlook I'm excited about that nice and then you know put it out so I'm done done with that done done but someone's going to do cover art so it's out now in the same cover

yeah so there's like a cover is so funny dude people made fun of me it's a google image cover it's highly pixelated sorry about that fucking you know

I was going to spend money on a cover artist now I have someone I'm going to pay someone to do a little bit of cover art someone from the reddit so they're going to do cover art so it'll be a second edition

it's fixed now technically it's tight but the second edition cover will be out so I'm going to pay someone to do a little bit of cover art someone from the reddit so they're going to do cover art so it'll be a second edition it's fixed now technically but the second edition cover will be out so I'm excited I'm going to start another book after that V tight

yeah bro I'm going to start I'm going to this will help me too because I'll take it away from my hallucinogenics book I think it's going to cover a lot of the stuff

hallucinogenics book is going to be great psychedelics for squares dude can't wait get this guy to the ethnogenic or ethnogenic arts. That'll be fucking... I mean, that's a hit.

That's a fucking hit. Teaming up with a psychiatrist. That's a guaranteed hit. Teaming up with a psychologist, dude. Nice. From Canada, it's no big deal, yeah. From Canada? Yeah, he's a dude

I did the Patreon stuff with. Are you going to manhood it out at all? I might... Is there a mention of manhood in this book or no? Oh, no. You don't need to rock of manhood. I recommend it.

Would a manhood help? Yeah, for sure. With a hallucinogenic voyage? I think. I personally feel a little more secure when I have a manhood on. Okay. So I don't see why it would hurt. So we'll see, dude.

But I got my sleep tent set up. I've been inside. Did you see my blackout board? You told me about the blackout board. I custom cut a big blackout board. Dude, it's literally, it's pure darkness. That's incredible. I'm in there at nighttime.

I literally, I was actually really tired the one night, and Brittany was down with her friends, and I was like, all right, you guys do your thing. Brittany, come get me. I laid in this thing. Dude, it's like when you hit pure darkness and you go to sleep, it feels like you're just literally being separated

out of your body. You're just like, oh, my God. Yeah. Like you just pass out. That's so nice. It's crazy. She came and woke me up, and I was like, ugh. So, yeah, man, I got the full sleep tent set up.

I'm fully done the first book. I'm free from propaganda, dude. Fully independent. Are you? I think so, dude. I think so. That's what everyone thinks. No one's free.

I mean, at least I never recite a media thing as fact. I always say this is what I saw. You have to take it in the way you don't. I don't ever take it. I try not to, at least. Yeah. Which is bad. We're creening towards something, dude.

The fact that you can't really trust the media. You can't say a bad thing about the government. But also also there's a bunch of weird conspiracies that make it like really dumb to do that it's like we're in a bad spot we're in a tough spot it's a weird spot for sure you can definitely say bad things about this government that's true but it's but not about the operate the day-to-day operations you can't You can say Trump's government is the most evil thing in the world. You can say Trump is Hitler. But if you say the government set up a thing and then, you know,

maybe fucking did some unheedly thing. Yeah, if you say the government did Sandy Hook. If you say Trump did Sandy Hook, people are like, fuck yeah. Why did Bush knock down the towers? I mean, dude, that would be...

That was a Jadakiss song. I know. I know. So, whatever, dude. It's no big deal. People are just was a Jadakiss song. I know. I know. So, whatever, dude. It's no big deal. People are just trying to live their lives, man. You know, it is what it is. Watch that Fox News.

You'll like it. I mean... I will love it. I mean, you already know this, but it's just... The news is entertainment. See, that's where I think you and I have... I don't think it's as calculated and manipulative. It's clearly manipulative, but I don't think it's like this... Like, I don't think it's as, you know, calculated and manipulated. Like, it's clearly manipulative. But I don't think it's like this.

Like, I mean. I don't think it's a global collective thing. I think it's very easy. Like, Roger Ailes at one point calls Dick Cheney because they were being that. While they were in the office, they were being dickheads. And Roger Ailes was like, do you want to invade Iraq? Because I can make that happen. Or I can make that not happen.

So you guys better start fucking treating us with some respect. Yeah. And he was like, alright. We'll do whatever you say. The Fox guy said that. Yeah, Dick Cheney was like, yeah, we're going to invade Iraq, so let us. And Fox News was like, okay. How'd they get this on the phone?

It's fake. It's not. I mean, it's an alleged phone call. Roger Ailes was pissed at that administration. He was like, let me talk to fucking Dick Cheney right now. I mean, which makes sense. Roger Ailes controlled half the country. He controlled Fox News.

He controlled the entire Republican base every day. Yeah, and you're saying that's immune to being tweaked by business interests and political interests? No, that's exactly what it is. Okay. But I don't think it's this Illuminati, satanic fucking... No, no, no. I think it's just clearly just like, hey, we need to make more money.

Don't fuck with us again. If you guys want to do something, I control what everyone thinks. So don't fucking... Don't fuck with me. So how does that not bleed into an Illuminati conspiracy land? It's not Illuminati. It's just not the Illuminati.

It's just dudes. That's what the fucking people who believe in the Illuminati think the Illuminati is. No, they think there's some sort of satanic cult with dudes in hoods and candles and shit. That's the newest morph of it. The Illuminati is exactly what you just described. And that's what I've called the Illuminati since we started talking about it. I'm not saying you don't. Shane, I would never say you don't believe in the Illuminati.

I know you believe in the Illuminati. It's just dudes that are the CEO. It's not some dastardly, like, oh, the Rothschilds are doing it. It's just like, here's the most rich people, and they're going to try to stay rich. Yeah.

Exactly. It's not like they're like, oh, let's set up Sandy Hook. Okay, but what do they do to stay, you know, to keep a billion dollars, a billion dollars, and make sure people don't, like, fuck with your things

that are keeping all the money come up, you have to do things. If you have tons of your hands in all kinds of- I don't think we're going to disagree on anything, but go ahead. If you have your hands in a bunch of foreign interests, and you're just pulling in money here and there, and all of a sudden some guy uprises in that country, you call Fox and go, Yo, dude, I don't like this new leader here. Sure. Blah, blah, blah. If you can pull that off, which I think people can and have,

that is the stuff of the Illuminati. Exactly. Now, the new thing about satanic corpse... Does that mean they're doing school shootings and shooting up movie theaters? I doubt it. I doubt it, too. I agree with that.

Now, does that mean they're not doing coups in fucking Panama? Sure. They are doing that. But maybe they're funding weird fringe political groups to maybe be agent provocateurs at other people's rallies. Yeah, I think they do that as well. So where does it stop? That's the thing.

That's where I'm like, I don't know. I don't know where the line would be for someone who would go disrupt the food in a third world country yeah and it's like totally cool with basically having slaves is going to be like well we're not going to fucking like you know we're not going to kill kids it's like that's where i'm like it's plausible but it's also so hard to have a massive the other where it stops is like to have a massive organization that's constantly shooting up malls and schools. That's impossible to pull off. Yeah.

I think that's – And like I said, I think they would have been like, all right, we got to come up with something different. Exactly. Because the school shooting is not working. People are catching – people are on to us. People know we set this up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm kind of nervous about this now.

So we've done 50 of them. Yeah. I mean that's – well, that's a scary thing to think about. If there's people who could stay the course and be like, hold, they'll eventually fucking break. Yeah, just a few more shootings and they'll give us their guns. And then what? Yeah. I mean, that would be the most epic I told you so, dude.

If you're like, all right, fine, enough school shootings. Here's our guns. Social credit system. God, we're like, ah, God damn it, fucking told you. Yeah, but again, I don't think it's like that. Fox News just blips out on your TV. We need to take their guns so we can enslave them. No, I don't think so.

No, we're just trying to make the news entertaining. So we're going to stir up controversies and conspiracies nonstop so that people are watching and we can sell advertisement. Yeah, I mean, dude, it is weird to to even get like i don't care about guns i don't really give a fuck about them i think they're cool i can't last time i had a like i was shooting a gun i was walking down the parking lot i dropped it accidentally so i shouldn't have one i definitely can't have one i don't yeah i wasn't fucking shooting i dropped the gun dude whatever it's no big deal but the fucking i got made fun of this suck dude i felt like such a bitch, dude.

That does suck. My fucking girlfriend picked it up. She was like, what are you doing with that? Let me hold it. I'm like, no, fucking I can hold it. I was like, I can hold it. Shut up. I can hold it.

And you dropped it? Dropped on the way out, dude. I wasn't even paying attention. Literally like a dog. I just, my hand released. And I was like, oh shit, I was holding a gun. So yeah, there's like. They need to, the government needs to take your guns away.

They for sure do. Well, they literally did, because I have a medical card. I'm not allowed to have a gun. Oh, nice. Yeah. Although it's constitutionally, I could make a case and go... I talked to a gun store guy when I was shooting. I was like, what's the deal with that?

He was like, hey, man, anyone's right to bear a gun. So they'll sell you a gun, but you're technically not allowed to. Whatever. Something weird. It was a loophole for the same base, really be like these people if we can't have guns can they and they're like we won't give them guns and you go to a gun store like we won't take your constitutional right dude you can have a gun it's like what the fuck but yeah dude it'd be like we need more ar-15s we need people to have ar-15s as a bad but dude it'll i'll get so that's where i

started to get propagandized i'm like i can't have a fucking ar-15 and in a bad... But, dude, I'll get so... That's where I start to get propagandized. I'm like, why can't I have a fucking AR-15? And in my head, I'm like, oh, I don't need a gun. I like walk with my kitchen knives. I'm like, careful, careful. Yeah. That'd be cool to have an AR-15. That'd be fucking cool to have. But I wouldn't want it.

Yeah, it'd be awesome. But it's also, dude, imagine the fucking being the dudes who sell guns. And you see school guns and you see school shootings and you're just like we gotta spin this dude that's a whole that's a thing

no one else talks about no everyone's talking about the NRA yeah but I'm saying if you're like a hardcore conspiracy theorist why would you think the NRA

wasn't being like I'm pretty sure fucking someone set these school shootings up if you throw that out in the river it's like that's a whole other part

they could fully be like dude you don't want this country taking your guns dude what are you a fucking pussy and you're like yeah dude

I'm not a pussy I want guns because the fucking sales skyrocket everyone gets scared that like they're going to take like oh this is the one

they're going to take them and that fucking gun sale so if you really want to get into conspiracy land it's like I think the NRA is setting up these school shootings I mean, that's an evil one. I mean, they're too Christian.

Apparently they wouldn't. But what do you think? Retards are shooting up school. Retards are shooting up schools and NRA is like, yes. Yeah. Jackpot. Yes. Yes.

Maybe they do sell enough guns like the dictators and stuff. It's weird, dude. We live in a fucked up world. One forty three. Thirty four. One thirty three. Thirty four. You done, bro. I'm clocking out, bro. What's got your goose, dude. Where are we at? We live in a fucked up world. 143, 34. 133, 34. You're done, bro.

I'm clocking it out, bro. What's got your goose, dude? Nothing's got my goose. I know. It's pretty... Shit I don't really... What do you care about? Jesus Christ. Talk to me, dude.

What do you care about? Nothing. I just... Like the conspiracy stuff I do. It's not a... It's not a... It's not a very... Well, I think you can talk about conspiracy stuff.

I'm talking about conspiracy stuff on a meta level. Yeah, I was trying to talk about a guy getting smashed by a car. Yeah, but I talked about it. I was making fun of his death, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You weren't having it. Why? You can't make fun of this man's death.

What's the point of talking about a guy crashing at a mud track if he can't have a good laugh? Well, of course I made fun of it. I said he went to Valhalla and I shot him a beer right after. Me too. Yeah. But you're talking on the cast. I was all for talking about this guy dying. Yeah.

Love it. But what happened? Nothing. Nothing. We talked about school shootings being set up, Q being run by the Republicans. Possibly, dude. Possibly. Possibly. Q being run by the Republicans. Possibly, dude. Possibly. Possibly.

Why? I'm not upset. This is all good. I'm not upset either. Yeah, this is all good. It's just been, it's long. It is long. Love talking, dude.

I know. I know. I'm just, I'm a little gassed, bro. I told you that fucking fiesta. I hear you. It was two days ago and it's still fucking. I hear you. Hitting me.

I just, I want to know. I feel like, I want to dig deeper into you, dude. I want to know. I feel like I want to dig deeper into you, dude. I want to know. I was talking to... I want to know what's going on with you, dude. I was talking to Bonnie McFarlane about our interaction grid. She and I have an interaction grid where we bully each other. Where you trash each other.

Yeah. And I was like, we got to get out of this. We do this every time we see each other. Need to get out of this'd you say she's fine i mean we laughed yeah dude why were i hope our i hope our fucking interaction doesn't devolve into fucking uh just the same old bullshit that's what i try to not have to be i try to have it not be that every week but it's like no this this was good everything was good i think it was fine i mean. I mean, it's just a podcast. But in my head, it's like, I don't know. I mean, again, I try to read the news, and I get like four minutes into it. I'm like, this sucks so bad.

But it's also, dude, again, with like Bezos, he cheated on his wife. And like, dude, literally the day after. And if you don't know, he owns the fucking Washington Post. The top story was like Trump basically, the whole thing, the reason my affair came out, he blamed it on Trump. It's like, dude, I'm watching that. I'm like, all right, that's pretty fucking weird, dude. You just got caught cheating, dude.

Take it on the chin. It has nothing to do with Trump. I guess I don't know how to explain it as far as these conspiracies and things not being that difficult just to be like, like yeah that's true like he controls the paper yeah he's gonna do that for sure this isn't like you know you know what i mean but how far will he go that's the question dude that's well that's all where do a billionaire when does a billionaire go like i mean there's obviously some like wayne enterprises out there who are like no

yeah then someone obviously kills them. The Kennedys were Wayne Enterprises. Yeah, they got fucked up. They got Wayne parent treatment. Did another Kennedy just die? Probably.

Yeah, I think another Kennedy. Didn't Ted Kennedy just die of brain cancer? I think so. I think a girl, like a girl. Did he die yet?

I don't know. A young girl Kennedy just died. I saw it in the hospital the other day. You sure Teddy Kennedy didn't just die? I mean, it's a safe bet.

And they also just came out with that movie about him killing that lady. Oh, yeah. The hooker. That's bad timing. Hold on. Well, a girl. Is Ted Kennedy fucking dead? I don't know.

Yes, he has to be. Ooh. Yeah, yeah. Was. Yeah. A young Kennedy girl just died. They were like, ah, God. I'm a retard.

Kennedy died in fucking 2009. Okay, he's been dead. He's been dead. What? Dude, Google Kennedy death. I think a girl, like a granddaughter, just died. No, wait a second. A youngster.

That was just how long he was in office. Oh. Unless he died in office. Wait, did they say he was dead? Yeah, he died in 2009. Dude, he's been... I'm a fucking retard. He was dead between fucking 2009 and 2014.

He died 10 years ago, and I's been... I'm a fucking retard. He was dead between fucking 2009 and 2014. He died 10 years ago. And I'm like, is he gone? Dude. And then they released that movie about him fucking killing a whore. Yeah, that's a bad... In a Chappaquiddick. That's a bad look, dude. Yeah, man.

Sir A.Z. Kennedy dead. What happened to her? The granddaughter of Robert Kennedy found dead at family compound. Oh, boy. What'd to her? The granddaughter of Robert Kennedy found dead at family compound. Oh, boy. What'd she do? Suicide. She suicided. What?

What do you think about definitely... Yeah, granddaughter of Robert Kennedy found dead. Apparently she had an attempt earlier, and then I guess pulled it off. What do you think about Epstein definitely going to be suicided here shortly? With the fact that they found him? Dude, first of all. He's about to get suicided. First of all, R. Kelly's missing, dude.

What the fuck is going on? R. Kelly's missing. Kels is missing? Kels is missing, dude. He con-aired and he got away. What? Yeah, dude. R. Kelly got away.

That reminds me. I do want to say this. I want to be on the record. Drake's going to be. He's on that R. Kelly tip. You think so? Drizzy Drake likes him young. He does.

It's somewhat known already, but this is one of those things where I want to, you know, you got to say something. Like, remember Louis, that whole thing? Yeah. And like, we knew about that. Yeah. And we were just like, I don't know. Drake, Drizzy Drake's into the young ones.

He's going to get got in the next five years. Unfortunately. Love me some Drizzy Drake, dude Drake's into the young ones. He's going to get got in the next five years. Unfortunately. Love me some Jersey Drake, dude. Dude. I drunk texted Birdman. I was fucked up. He gave you the gossip? Then he hit me the, what's up, homeboy, the next day.

I haven't had the heart to reply. So you're getting good info that he's fucking... Birdman did not supply me with that info. It's just a separate story. Oh, never accuse the Birdman of fucking... Separate on not supply me with that info. It's just a separate story. I'll never accuse a Birdman. Separate on the ticker. Also on the ticker. Drunk texted Birdman. He replied. I didn't reply because I'm ashamed.

What? Trump texted the Birdman? No. I did. I was like, what the fuck's going on? Drunk texted. I got hammered and I was like, dude, let's see if Birdman will FaceTime us. Oh, that's so fucking funny. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like what the fuck's going on Drunk texted I got hammered And I was like dude Let's see if Birdman

Will FaceTime us Oh that's so fucking funny Yeah yeah yeah Damn dude Can't believe I fucking Chipped a tooth though You're calling for people You're calling for

People to take him down Drizzy Drake Yeah Nah I love Drake Really I would hate to see him You would defend I like Drake

A pederast But I don't think he's a pedophile He just likes young girls. Okay, how young? Again. Post-pedophile, like 17. Ah, dude, that's called a pedophile, bro. No, it's not.

Like, it's not a pedophile. Pedophile is like pre-pubescent. Pedophile is... Okay. Yeah. You got the guy with that itch. You don't think he's maybe going to Thailand and being like, Whoa, I didn't know.

I think he's on that Kells tip Kells went like 13-12 Alright well that's a little young Kells is a little young You're telling me Drake is fucking Jojo Siwa I think Drake Jojo Siwa is like an 8 year old pop sensation I think Drizzy Drake likes him young

Youngsters Right around that So you're allowed to fuck a seven? What's the point of 18? Why does everyone I just picked that number Does he think he like Does his tour

And like How they I think they had like Screenshots of him Coming back to Texas Again Yeah yeah yeah A very specific date

Yeah dude Oh it's just We like Texas I think Texas 16 Texas is young dude Yeah Texas is like I'm young down there Speaking of Texas is young, dude. Yeah, Texas is like... I'm young down there. Speaking of, I'll be in Texas at the end of this month.

Any 17-year-olds want to come out to my shows. So, dude, that's fucking crazy. Yeah, I have a good theory on Jersey Drake. He's getting brought down, bro. You think so? No doubt. That's going to be a big one. It's going to be a sad day, dude.

You think so? I'm going to be sad on that one I mean if he goes the full R. Kelly route I think he's going Kells You think R. Kelly disappeared and talked to Drizzy? He vanished dude He vanished R. Kelly evaded the authorities

Kells is gonna be like You know at the end of Star Wars When Luke sees those ghosts Drake's gonna be at a concert And there's gonna be like a hologram Cosby A hologram fucking Kells Jackson Louis will be jerking off As a ghost Jackson too Jackson will be in there Drake's going to be at a concert and there's going to be like a hologram Cosby, a hologram fucking Kells.

Jackson. Louis will be jerking off as a ghost. Jackson too. Jackson will be in there just like, oh. Yeah, Drizzy's going to, I don't know. Do you have any other pedophiles you think? I don't, dude, I don't, I don't, I mean.

Anybody you'd like to allege? No, man. I can't think of anyone That thinks a pedophile Besides Drake Now I'm pretty fucking sure About that but He has a song with I don't know He has like songs

That people think are about There's this chick named Georgia I forget how fucking young she is Well he married a porn star Or not he married He didn't he like He impregnated like a stripper Or a porn star yeah

There was a French porn star Yeah that was the one They made fun of him for The pus one they made fun of him for. The pusher team made fun of him for. This chick's 22. She was born in 97. Drake was like... Four years ago, he was talking to her.

Wait, what? She's 22 now. He was talking to her four years ago? She just turned 22. He was talking to her. They had's 22 now he was talking to her she just turned 22 he was talking to her yeah they had like a song together yeah in 2016 dude i think also too he came up in like child star stuff so i think it's like you come up on a different world with that shit yeah he had it's like dude if you're a child star you definitely have like 30 year old ladies blowing

you and shit you know what i'm saying yeah like if you're a celebrity and a kid that's celebrity mojo like a girl's not gonna not suck your dick because you're like 14 she's done it she's gonna do it so damn you know i'm saying yeah definitely getting hit he's had some weird experiences for child star yeah you gotta remember the corey fell all those dudes he is coming off child star now all of a sudden he's like a hardcore rapper. Post child star. Weird times. Drake's got to be going through a lot of weird... Yeah, you really don't think about how fucked up and weird that guy must be.

I mean, dude, it's got to be... Meanwhile, Kanye West is still the best. Kanye came up traditional as far as rappers are concerned. Chicago, gangland, all that. Now he's retarded. He got hit with a bug. He got bit. as far as rappers are concerned. Yeah. Chicago, gangland, all that. Yep. Now he's retarded. He got hit with a bug. He got bit bad.

Yeah, but the child star shit's out of this world. Yeah, if you're a child star, you're guaranteed retarded. He might have got head too young, dude. That can happen. I mean, yeah, that's actually getting sexually assaulted as a youth. And yeah, that leads to some bad behavior. Another child star getting head too young. Yeah. Leads to you doing collabs with JoJo Siwa.

Hot 17-year-olds. And then you have like a diss track about her on the next CD. Really? He's like, you could have been something. I could have made you. I could have molded you into something great. He never names who it is, but everyone's like, that's who it's about for sure. Yeah, some hot-ass British chick named Georgia with a J.

He could have made Georgia great? Could have made Georgia great again, but she decided to pick someone else. Who'd she go with? Instead of Drizzy Drake. I don't know. Somebody that does the same thing as him. He just laughs. He just laughs at them.

You guys aren't even close. You guys aren't even close. You guys aren't even close to me, dude. Close to what I'm doing. I fucked so many 17-year-olds. I fucked so many. I'm telling you, Drake's on that Arkells. Oh, man. When he goes down, that'll be tough.

Dude. I'll be sad. Guess what show he produced. Yeah, Euphoria. Euphoria, dude. Yeah, he produced Euphoria. Yeah, man. Dude, you are rifling through the air. You are rifling through the air, dude. Tip of the Drizzy Spear right now. Yeah, Euphoria. Euphoria, dude. Yeah, he produced Euphoria. Yeah, man. Dude, you are rifling through the air.

You are rifling through the air, dude. Tip of the Jersey Spear right now. Yeah, man. Unfortunately. Yeah, you didn't want to be like this. When I looked up who that, because I was listening to this song, and I was like, who the fuck is this about? I looked it up, and I was like, he must have wrote this song in 2016.

She's just turned 22. Sorry. I'm so happy. I'm like, what is going on with you? And you're like, well, Drake's a pedophile. That's what turned 22. Sorry. I'm so happy. I'm like, what is going on with you? And you're like, well, Drake's a pedophile. That's what I'm dealing with right now. I'll tell you what's going on with me. No, I don't like talking about what I'm doing.

You're not wrong. It makes me feel gay. Why? I don't know. You have to, man. All right, so I just went home because August is January. No, I wasn't crediting. I think that was genuinely what was going on with you.

Oh, no. I just remembered I wanted to bring that up to the cast. No, exactly. On record. That's why I asked the question. The cast was all over it. It was ultimately fruitful. I was like, what are you thinking about right now?

Well, Drake's a pedophile. I'm like, there we go. Now we're fucking talking. Here's some news. No, just gay traveling. Got a lot of fucking gay traveling coming up. I was supposed to go. I got to leave for Phoenix the 8th, 8th, 9th, and 10th.

I'll be in Phoenix. And then I was going to go to L.A. on the 11th. But now I have to fly back to New York on the 11th to film something and then fly to L.A. So I got to go New York, Phoenix, New York, L.A. That is tiring, dude. In like four days. Yeah, and I used to be the biggest person to be like, dude, actors should get paid like 14 bucks an hour.

It's pretty easy. If you're crossing multiple time zones and doing all that shit, it fucks you up, dude. Yeah, so that'll be exhausting. And I was like, I'll just go home and rest a few days. I ended up blacking out. Hilarious. It's retarded.

I was like, this will be a nice trip home. I'll just hang out. Went to the dirt track. Blacked out. Obviously. Balled out. Man, guy died. Guy fucking got smashed. Fuck, man.

We were talking about his day. How weird is that? That's how you just die. You know what I mean? That guy had a normal day. Yeah. Guy went about. I wonder if there was a moment where he was just like, something's weird.

He fell off? Yeah. You'd just feel like, oh, this is my last day on earth. He'd probably was complaining about coffee. Could be. he felled off yeah like you just feel like oh this is my last day on earth and you just keep like he probably like was complaining about coffee you know could be

it's like this goddamn neighborhood is a piece of shit can't wait to see the race tonight people who believe in like ghosts and shit one of the big thing is like when a ghost is near you you get goosebumps

that's also like what your central nervous system does when it's scared like you get your hair stand on edge and you're scared so it's like yeah but then that guy just goes through his day and he's nervous system does when it's scared. Like, you get your hair standing on edge and you're scared. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's like, yeah.

But then that guy just goes through his day and he's standing on the bed of a truck watching the sun go down over beautiful Mechanicsburg. Just a glorious night. And then that 43 car

flips over. I mean, dude. You got one second to be like, car! He couldn't move. That guy was frozen. I mean, those things are flying. Plus, his light bulb flashed before his eyes, dude. You got one second to be like, car! He couldn't move. That guy was frozen. Plus, his light flashed before his eyes, too. Yeah, his light flashed.

It was just him standing at a dirt track every night. That was his life. Just like, whoo! Every day, every day. It's still terrifying to think about. If you die after you're dead, and you're just like, oh, fuck, I'm dead. It's gotta be terrifying, dude.

What? If you die after you're dead? If you're really alive after you're dead? If you don't just completely black out? If you're just like, what the fuck? That would be horrifying, dude. Look at the stadium. You just fly away.

You're just trapped on Earth forever, just like, hey, guys. I haunt Williams Grove now. That's a good place to haunt, though, name-wise. For sure. It's spooky Williams Grove. Yeah. You'd be hanging out with a bunch to haunt, though. Name-wise. For sure. It's spooky Williams Grove. Yeah. You'd be hanging out with a bunch of racers, though. A bunch of dudes have been fucking killed there.

That'd be a good place to ghost. For sure. To be a ghost, Williams Grove would be sick. It's kind of crowded, though, dude. That's like the mall of ghosts. There's a lot of ghosts there. But they're all the exact same. They're all wearing jumpsuits.

It's like, hey, took that turn a little too sharp, man. Just watch people laugh. Like, oh, someone fucking died in the dirt track Hey have some respect Yeah that guy Just Standing there Car flips

Flies right at you Yeah I think about that a lot About my death dude And then me and Beezer are standing on the fence like Ha ha ha ha Guy fucking died We're like hurry up and chug that. That's because it's not sacred to you guys.

That is not sacred to you guys. A man died at the dirt track, and you guys are fucking around. I saw a little kid crying and hugging his mom, and I was like, oh, this is sad. Sadder than I thought. Yeah, dude. I was reverent. So was Grandpa. Grandpa died.

I was reverent. How was the bees? Was the bees on his best behavior? None of us were really that. We weren't was reverent So was Grandpa I was reverent How was the bees Was the bees on his best behavior None of us were really that We weren't that reverent As soon as we got out In the grass parking lot We started getting fucked up

You can't even imagine that dude There's people there And we just went out You know Oh for sure We were just like whatever We were gonna fucking go home Didn't affect us

Can't tell the viewers That's crazy It's just funny to just be like Oh fuck a guy got smashed by a car Anyway let's go Let's go try to get some pussy Like you know Yeah that's where we's just funny to just be like oh fuck a guy got smashed by a car anyway let's go let's go try to get some pussy like you know

yeah that's where we're at now literally and it's not it's no fault of I'm the same way I would be like that's fucking hilarious

but to think about that you're out someone dies you're just like whoa oh whoa holy fuck what else are we gonna do

oh let's go somewhere else I'm bored this is B dude it's like what the fuck yeah it was funny the announcer had to come on and be like and uh

that is the end of the race. He knew he died. Everybody, we're going to have to get out of here due to the severity of the wreck. That's it. The race is over. Dude, the driver killed an old man, too. Think about that.

Flipped. You're better. Dude, imagine being like, fuck. That guy was probably like, let's go to a fucking brew house. Let's go get fucked up. Fuck that guy. Do you quit or do you like stay on the track?

I'd imagine you have to like, just dirt track etiquette. You got to go like, like address the person's family. You got to knock up. Be like, hey man, I'm the driver that took out your grandpa. I owe everybody. Took out your pa. Took out your pa, your papaw. Your pa was at the track, got hit with a car.

I mean, again though, 67, he was hanging paw was at the track. Got hit with a car. I mean, again, though, 67. He was hanging out at the dirt track. That's how he wanted. That's exactly how he wanted to go. You'd have to imagine. I could. I kind of wouldn't mind going that way. At 67?

No, if I'm just standing on the sidelines at a Notre Dame game. Ball just takes you out. 70-year-old quarterback leads the wide out a little too far. I get fucking lit up and explode. Yeah, and then a bunch of kids just are like, oh, they go get hammered at night. Holy fuck, you see that guy get fucking killed? He fucking died, dude. Holy fuck.

Some idiot died. Yeah. Yeah. It's pretty nuts. It's going to be funny. It'll be funny to watch people. Eh, maybe it won't even be a big thing. But people our age hit the age

where we're grappling with our own death. It's going to be pretty funny to watch people. To ironically be like, I'm dying right now. Oh, my God. Well, all that shit will start going out the window. All the fucking people. Yeah, the irony.

All the ironic hipster, liberal, gay shit. Once they start to die? No, once they have a fucking family that shit gets cut out i don't think so dude i see i've seen people talk about like dadding and momming and like adulting what with kids and it's like you're gonna have to dying yeah this is the worst part of adulting man hashtag fucking dying right now i can't believe i'm dying dying yeah dying's gay yeah dude i mean i don't know cancer is nice if you want to get like a nice run on social media to make a comeback that's a

fucking heavy stream of likes oh i still haven't dipped what still haven't dipped nice have not thrown a dip oh that's fucking sick how's facebook dude sucks dude what's facebook like now it's gay i'm sorry go ahead so you're not you're off not dipping sucks dude i dude what's facebook like now it's gay sorry go ahead so you're not you're off not dipping sucks dude i'm trying to dip like i i literally like woke up this morning in the shower and i was like i can't wait to throw it oh fuck i can't dip i literally think of the rest of your life like that i don't think because i'll start dipping again if it persists if every day talk about every day i wake up and i'm like, damn, I wish I could dip. True. I'll probably just dip.

Yeah, they talk about that, how the methods of sobriety that are just guys like, don't get high, don't get high, don't get high. They're like, ultimately, they're like, dude. You're going to get high. Guess what, bro? The gum helps. I got the gum. Plus, I spent enough money on it. I'm not going to fuck it up.

Well, can't you get like. That's another thing that helps. Isn't there. This fucking box of gum was 80 bucks. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. isn't there this fucking box of gum was 80 bucks yeah that's true yeah you gotta at least use that up can't they get like kind of like nicotine

I don't understand how I can get a Juul I can do a lot of shit can you get cleaner nicotine that doesn't give you cancer I don't think it's the nicotine so what is it I think it's all the chemicals

I mean I'm sure nicotine gives you tobacco or cancer I mean but yeah that's true all the fucking rat shit chemicals but I'm saying

like dude they smoke there's like Dude, they smoke nicotine. There's like the other types of nicotine. Like the shaman smoke. Whatever, it's like a different strain of it or whatever. I mean, dude, that's like people have been smoking that forever. So it's like, can you get your hands on some cleaner nicotine and chew it? Some cleaner tobacco? That's what this is.

This is nicotine. Or cleaner tobacco. There are like different types of dip. Yeah. There's like a nicotine,, tobacco-free dip type thing. I mean, that's what this gum is. You chew it and put it in your lip. Yeah, so why don't you just take the nick?

You like the juice of sucking and spitting and all that stuff. I love sucking juice out of it. You love sucking and spitting, dude. I love sucking and spitting. It makes me feel good. Yeah, I don't know. I got addicted to it, so I like it. But you like the ritual. Well, yeah. love i mean that's what fucking addiction is where it's like it's not

it's not like this fucking like oh i gotta fucking have it for sure yeah for sure damn i should throw in a dip yeah like it's it's that it's not like a heroin thing where you're like i'm gonna be sick without it yeah your body creates nicotine but you want it create the way yeah the way it's it's when you think about like addiction and shit you think you've got to have it. But a craving is literally just like, come on, man. It's funny. I need to have...

I've learned this. I need THC in my system. So I was like, I don't care how it gets in there. I need it in there. What? Oh, yeah. It's not all day, every day. I've oscillated between this since I was 17.

I got THC in my system. I'm like, this is nice. And then I would got THC in my system I'm like this is nice And then I would like go off of it for a while And then as soon as it goes back in But then I'll load myself up Last week I had too much in my system And I feel that And I'm like alright time to slow down

I give it like dry out for a week And then I start getting like I could just go a whole month without smoking weed at all But I just become so miserable I'm getting there with booze I gotta fucking chill with booze Yeah It's like

dry it out it's getting pretty ridiculous well it's you're hitting the point where there's a lot of people I know who just never turn back and they go fuck it dude

well I went through phases in my life where I like didn't really drink like there were times how long for like pretty much

like for years I would like not really drink gotcha like I would drink a little I would get fucked up but not like yeah I would never drink like three days sure but now it's like now it's nothing now it's like if i take two or three days off i'm like nice damn yeah man you're drinking like i did in college i'm drinking like i did i was like i was yeah yeah i was like five i was like five

six nights a week in college getting like i was hammered, dude. Yeah, it's hard not to. Last night, I didn't drink for almost a month before last night. And even still, I was fucking slamming wine. I couldn't get drunk. Ah, that's the worst. When you're drinking, you're like, I'm not even getting drunk. Ah, it sucks. Yeah, yeah.

Three hours later, you're like, fuck, I'm blacked out. Four hours later, you can't move your face, and you're like. Your girlfriend's like, are you fucking high? And you're like, barely. Yeah. This is weird for me. Friday night, I got fucked up. Really?

Yeah. So it took off Saturday. Obviously, it had taken off right now. So there's a good two days. Monday, I'm not going to drink. What if you were to not just drink for like a month? It would be difficult. It would be difficult.

Yeah. I like to drink one or two for a show. You think you'd feel a little sick if you didn't drink for like a month? No. Really it would be difficult yeah I like to drink one or two for a show you think you feel a little sick if you didn't drink for like a month no really

no it's not like that I know guys that have the shakes no I just didn't drink for 48 hours I'm not saying you're an alcoholic

I'm just saying I know dudes I've met dudes I was getting hit with a lot of that really like I'm concerned about you

I'm like shut up yeah I'm fine yeah yeah I feel like you could I feel like you could not drink if you didn't want to.

Yeah. What's that look? Shot you double eye. What's that fucking look? I say this about myself. I've been trying to forever only use weed, like edibles, like once or twice a month. That's it. No, like just use it like that.

Man, is it hard. But I'm getting better at it because it devolves into me being like i'll try and i'm like wow this is the best i forgot why i don't do this all the time then i'm like kind of trying to like sneakily be high all day and like sit in vape pens the next thing i know i'm like not functioning well and i'm like all right look back to the back to the basics but i know that if it's out of my system for a while i start getting crab b I get serious. That happens to me. I start becoming kind of serious.

I freak myself out. And I'm just like, not even like, I mean, I'm semi-serious. But I'll get like, I can only describe it as my mentality when I was 19, when I was real into business. If weed starts totally leaving my system. You just go full business. I get into that I get into like a whole different persona

almost it's real weird it's scary yeah I can feel I feel it coming on so this is just a weed persona and the real you

is just a strict businessman I think so dude wow but not even though no so you're like a weed persona no it's really like

it's like a what are those little like film things you look into and flip it it's just like a deluded person who thinks she's a business. Gyroscope, some kind of. It's not a kaleidoscope, it's some kind of scope. You go in this and click the thing and it looks at a different filter.

So it's like diluted businessman. I'm like, switch. And it's just like whatever I do now. Shaman. Philosopher. Switch. But yeah. Maybe retarded philosopher.

Yeah. Not sure. Yeah, the booze thing, though. It's good, like, all these shows coming up. That's what... And then I'll be in L.A. for fucking 10 days. That'll be party time. It's hard not to party.

Yeah, do some shows. I've got some shows at the store lined up. That'll be fucking sick. Yeah, I just... I'm excited about that. That'll be fun. Yeah. That will be fun my thing with it is that like partying per se like to go out with strangers and like i'm gonna get hammered you go out oh yeah you're out with your friends usually and you're out for me to be like i need to go out this weekend and like hit a club and meet

strangers and get drunk that's where i like don't want to i legitimately don't want to do that never i was looking forward to going at a wedding. I'm like, I'm going to get hammered. I'm going to try to get hammered even though it didn't work. But yeah, obviously

I am Alex Jones. You're like, man, the fucking head like six glass of wine. You didn't do anything. Sorry. The lady at one point kind of like the

bartender. I started. I was like the only one left on like the doing the old Oregon Trail back and forth to the bar. It's like it was like

I don't know how many, but at a certain point it was my last couple glasses of it. The lady was just kind of like, she was filling them all the way to the brim

like, all right, dude, leave me the fuck alone. I kept coming back like, it's not enough, dude. Yeah, I would get two. I would go and get two. I'd be like, can I get two whiskey

and gingers? Yeah, that's a smart move. Just keep getting two and going back. But then it's another thing. You get older and it's like, it's really not that cool you're getting hammered. No. You get older and it's like, it's really not that cool.

You're getting hammered. No. When you were younger, it was like, sick, dude. Now it's like, you're laying in your parents' backyard on a Friday night. Yeah. Yeah, that's tough. That's tough. Then again, it's like, what the fuck?

It was nice. Laying in my parents' backyard was really nice. Or what's your- Just seeing the stars. I haven't seen the fucking stars in so long. That's really nice, dude. I forgot. I was taking in the southern sky.

It's awesome, dude. Yeah. I was looking at the southern clouds and shit and i was like wow it looks fucking nice yeah it was awesome alabama's nice but yeah the alternative and this is what i think bums people out who are sober it's like the alternative to not being high is being sober and then you're like at mcdonald's with like nine people you're kind of not friends with because you all got to be sober and you're like drinking coffee like this is fun this is good but again I'm not going to be sober it all goes out the window I'm never going to be sober

of course not unless this thing does actually get out of hand and I have to which would be gay I'm not going to be sober but I hope it doesn't

I don't think it will it wouldn't I was laughing I think everyone would tell me what that would entail me being out of control I laughed I briefly laughed to myself.

I've done it. It's not good. Exactly. I've done it. I've drank like a case, just about a case a day or every other day, and it just results in me being 320 pounds and laying around. Pretty inside and very sad. Well, you know you lose.

I told you this before. You don't get REM sleep. So if you're drinking constantly all the time, you're just not. I also was thinking about that. The damage I must have just done to my brain on Friday must be crazy. From not sleeping? you don't get REM sleep. So if you're drinking constantly all the time you're just not. I also was thinking about that. Like the damage I must have just done to my brain on Friday. Must be crazy.

From not sleeping? Also last week I pissed myself. Happens. I told you that was more. These are two like powerful fucking nights of like

hard damage to my body. How many drinks do you think you would consume in one of these nights? I can't. Hit me with a number. I have no idea. 20?

Yeah. What? Yeah. Take a fucking break, dude. Probably, yeah. Take a fucking break. Nah, dude. I had like six glasses of wine.

I was dancing with someone's grandma last night, dude. Nah, dude. Why? Take a break. These are hours of drinking. This is from... See... We got to the racetrack at 8.

I went to bed at 5 a.m. Jesus, dude. See, that's for me. I smoke weed intentionally while I drink. Otherwise, I do the same thing, and I'll just keep drinking and drinking until I see double. And then, like, I just...

Someone carts me off, or I'm just kind of like... Yeah, yeah, yeah. I smoke weed while I'm drinking. To knock yourself out? Because it makes me tired. It kind of levels me, and it's just like...

I just start... And I'll just, like, fall into a stupor. I'm whoa dude god's a fucking pimp dude i don't got it alcohol evil dude i don't need any more of this and i'm like i gotta dance with her grandma i'll feel so bad if i don't do it yeah this is like uh i don't know let's see how phoenix goes give phoenix around no pressure i mean you can only quit so many things that's my dad's famous saying you have to you have to abuse something. Yeah. I'm going to definitely drink, but if I can keep

it not blacked out, that's a win. Fair. I'll just have a couple beers. We're good. Fair. Now it's getting to the

point where I'll go to a show and the bulls will show up. Dogs coming out. Let's do a shot. Let's get crazy. Yeah, man. All right.

What? All right. I'll do it. Do a shot. I'll do one. I'll do a shot. Alright, I'll do it. I'll do one. I'll do a fucking dude. You see me, bro. I'm half Native American. As soon as the fire water hits my lips, dude, I'm fucking gone. You don't handle it that well. As soon as the fire water hits

my lips, you know. You handle booze weak. Yes. But you usually have fun. You're usually having fun. It's not bad. I'm a good time, dude. You're a real good time, Charlie. I'm an old good good time when someone puts some fucking liquor in me i'm fucking cracking wise you and me have to drink together i know we haven't drank we haven't done anything we do we have to fucking we have to raise a goblet dude i know i wish you could have come see that guy get killed with me unfortunately i was studying a fucking interracial wedding with heavy christian

dynamics going on it was yeah i could have seen a guy die but instead i got to watch the guy die, but instead I got to watch. Seeing a guy die is sick. Well, I got to watch all the stuff I'm reading about with different belief systems kind of moving on one thing, and I was like, dude, this is fun. This shit is crazy. When the crash happened, it was on the other side of the track, and everyone ran to it. Of course.

And while everyone was running to it, I was kind of like, this is weird. We're all running to see it. And then once people started turning around the other way, I was like, ooh, this must be bad. Yeah. Everyone thought it was

just a regular wreck. Yeah, dude. Like running over like, oh, what happened? Whoa, whoa. I mean, dude, are they not, are they hoping on some level that doesn't happen?

What? Going to the racetrack. You're hoping to see a wreck. You're not hoping to see a guy get fucking splattered by a fucking car. Oh, God. A 67-year-old get fucking,

oof. I mean, people used to pack in arenas to watch people cut each other's heads off dude sure i mean that's in there you don't think you want to see a fucking little splatty splat i was bragging about what i was telling people i was like god damn i saw another guy die no i didn't see this and i didn't even go to the first one The one the guy died at Yeah Yeah I haven't seen these Fatalities But I'm there I'm always there dude I'm like the angel of death

You're like the fucking dude In the Bone Thugs video dude I am You should start wearing A black leather duster And going over there Just poking dudes on the forehead The fuck

Get your hands off me You fucking weirdo Dude That's another thing We got there I was like Holy shit Like every once

in a while like when i'm doing stand-up i'm like i'm not even a fucking hick this is all a fucking gimmick i'm a fraud and then i go home and i'm like holy shit i was not lying yeah dude williams grove is like the level of white trash there is insane dude i mean dude you just told me a guy died in the back of a pickup truck from a dirt car. I don't think anyone's questioning that, dude. It's like dudes at flannel cutoffs. It's Larry the Cable guys. Several Larry the Cable guys. Larry the Cable men, dude.

Everywhere. There's so many of them. Larry the Cable gang, dude. There's a ton of them. It was crazy. Yeah, man. Imagine. And then they all have that white trash bone structure and fade.

They're all rattyty looking weirdos. And that's, dude, that's the, I was watching a thing the other day. They're talking about the, there's like the left way and the right way. And there's a lot of people who just like, where they grow up around. It's almost like instinctual to just like grab onto all of it. Be like, yes, this is what we're doing. No one asks any questions. And I'm going to just wear cut-off flannels,

and I'm going to stay here. And, you know, it's like, that's one way. And there's a whole other type of person who's like, yeah, this is weird. I'm going to try to do something else. And it's like, dude. Most of the time, they get bullied out, that type of person.

Normally, they're ostracized, and then they're like, I'm going to go be different and move to the city. Yeah. You know? Sometimes they're just like, it was kind of weird. But again. Sometimes they're a trailblazer. Like myself, where you're like, you know what? I heard that.

This town ain't big enough for me. Nope. I'm going to go out to the Big Apple. Go to the Big App, maybe. I went and took a bite out. A big old bite. But eventually you settle into something. Yeah.

Hopefully stand-up. Yeah, exactly. We don't take kindly to you at the racetrack, dude. They did not take kindly to my friends. Really? My friend Bison showed up in khaki shorts and a polo. My friend Boy was wearing fucking boat shoes. How dare he, dude?

I was like, you guys are going to get us fucked up in here. Sheesh. Yeah, bro. To be continued, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's wrap it up. It's like two hours and 60 minutes. That's long.

I'm going to be gone forever. Yeah, I'll figure. Let's wrap it up. It's like two hours and 16 minutes. That's long. I'm going to be gone forever. Yeah, I'll figure something out. So we'll figure something out. I'm going to figure out page content, figure out some calls. We'll work it out, dude. Yeah, we'll get some shit. Meantime, dude. Go to your stuff. God damn.

What? Nothing. You'll be gone, bro. Sad stuff going on. Really? Yeah. That whole thing. The stand.

Oh, yeah. It's fucked up. It's fucking crazy. Yeah. Horrible. If you're still listening to this, if somehow you're still listening to this, this weekend, the 8th, 9th, and 10th, I'll be in Phoenix.

I'll be at the House of Comedy. Then I'm in L.A. forever. Then Thursday the 22nd, come to the Harrisburg Comedy Zone. There's rumors of Matt McCusker going to be there also. There's rumors circulating. It's tough to get a hold of. I won't either confirm nor deny. 23rd and 24th, D.C. Drafthouse.

28th, 29th, 30th, 31st, Austin, Texas. Let's do it. That's it. Hell yeah, dude. Bon Voyage. Yo Yo thanks for doing this tonight This is good We're able to get this out to the peeps We gotta get it to the peeps

This is gonna be This month Is gonna be the ultimate Test of faith Yeah dude This is gonna be tough For these boys Well they'll be alright

You should run You should do an app You and Gerbs While I'm gone Yeah I'm gonna try to get I'm gonna try to do one With Burt and Butterly That'd be awesome I think that'd be a funny mix That would be a good mix Try to and Gerbs, while I'm gone. Yeah, I'm going to try to do one with Burt and Butterly. That'd be awesome.

I think that'd be a funny mix. That would be a good mix. Try to get Gerbs. We'll figure it out. Dude, the whole squad's here. Hold the ship down. You don't need old chain, dude. The squad's here.

I mean, dude. Perhaps my work here is done. Built a Philly empire. Oh. Dude. I mean, this cast was never about orthodoxy, bro. It was never that. This cast can morph wildly. People are like, oh, I love this little thing. It's like, yeah. You never know what's bro. It was never that. This cast can morph wildly.

People are like, oh, I love this little thing. It's like, yeah. You never know what's next. There was an Irish poet who used to do that. He would have a style of poetry, and he would just ditch it, and then lose his whole fan base, and start up and rise up again, and ditch his whole thing. Did it his whole life.

It's one of the greats. It's what you do. We're like two young fucking Martin Luthors, bro. We're just driven by it. Martin Luther Kang, dude. Martin Luther. Kang Jr., dude. 1,400, dude. I'm Kang Jr., no. I'm old school Martin Luther. Nouthers, bro. We're just driven by... Martin Luther Kang's, dude. Martin Luther's. Kang Jr.'s, dude. 1400s, dude.

I'm Kang Jr., no. I'm old school Martin Luther. No, no, no. I'm just battling, dude. I'm Kang Jr., dude. I'm just battling my demons, dude. That's all I can do. All right, we're out of here.

All right.