Memory Lane with Kerry Godliman and Jen Brister - S02 E09: Angela Barnes

Episode Date: August 30, 2023

"I don't know what the photographer's shouted and it's made loads of them look like sex dolls" Angela takes Kerry and Jen through her beautiful and heartwarming photos! Photo 01 - Growing up in a big family Photo 02 - Angela's 'crimewatch' photo (not literally) Photo 03 - Angela and Michael Fabbri Photo 04 - Angela's wedding day! PICS & MORE - https://www.instagram.com/memory_lane_podcast/ A Dot Dot Dot Production produced by Joel Porter Hosted by Jen Brister & Kerry Godliman Distributed by Keep It Light Media Sales and advertising enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Right, we can start again now, because I wasn't recording, so none of that, let's go back. None of that gold. None of that camping, more camp people are going to be like. I mean, crisis is niche. I mean, it's getting niche and niche. I think it was barely bronze, but let's go back anyway. Hello, and welcome to Memory Lane. I'm Jen Bristair, and I'm Kerry Godleman.

Each week we'll be taking a trip down Memory Lane with our very special guest as they bring in four photos from their lives to talk about. To check out the photos we'd be having a natter with them about, they're on the episode image and you can also see them a little bit more clearly on our Instagram page. So have a little look at Memory Lane podcast. Come on, we can all be nosy together. So you're going to be camping in a tree? I'm going to be, no, I'm not camping in a tree.

I'm staying in a tree house. Yeah, definitely a different thing. You're saying that as if it's not a different thing. You're saying that as if it's the same thing. No, it's only just because I just got back from a holiday that involved camping in a tree. Literally, tent up a tree. And I'm going to send Joel pictures to put on our Instagram

so that people don't think I'm mad. Okay, it's a thing. They're a tents up a tree. But you're staying in a tree house. I'm staying in a tree house with a bed. I think so, yeah, it's got a bed. I think it's even got a toilet. Oh my God.

No, because that's the other thing. If you are up a tree in a tent, What'd you do when you need to go to the... That's why I didn't do it. Sorry, it's shimmy down the trunk of the... Yeah, totally. In the middle of the night? Yeah, I didn't get involved.

That's why... I just wasn't doing that. Have you ever seen that film Avatar? No. Well, they're all up trees. And when I'm watching it, I'm thinking they obviously don't have, you know, sewage or running. I think what do these people... I mean, they're not people, but that's...

Maybe it wasn't working as a film if that's what was... distracting you from the pot. I don't think James Cameron put enough thought into that. I, what about their Ewox? They lived up in trees, didn't they? Do you remember that in return of the Jedi? What were they doing? It never distracted me. Did that their toilet

situation was? When I was watching Star Wars, I was thoroughly gripped by George Lucas's commitment to narrative and character development and you were sitting there thinking, how did he's not going to the loon? I don't think I was thinking that when I was a kid. But as a

adult where that is a real anxiety for me is middle of the night toilet ablutions. I, that really will, that stays in my head and it will go round in a, well, in a loop, I suppose, as I'm watching the program thinking, well, I don't know how they're going to the toilet in the middle of the night because that's what I'm, that's what I'm doing. And as soon as you said tent up a tree, I thought no. Of course. Absolutely. I'm 100% behind you. I didn't sleep up the tree. As soon as I saw it, I went, I'm not doing that. And there was some Airbnb little cabin situations over in the trees with a loo. And I went, I'll have one of those, please.

Did, just to, because I mean, this is following a theme. I know, we won't revisit camping after the summer. No, no, I don't, I just, I, because this is just to carry on this, this thematically. Yeah. Where was Ben? Ben came with me into the cabin. This time I didn't abandon Ben up a tree. Okay, because I, and even Frank, my son.

was going to sleep in the tree and then he went please don't make me sleep in the tree mommy and I went no way you're not sleeping up so we all slept in the cabin you all stepped in the cabin okay that's fine it would have been a bit weird if frank had been up there on his own yeah I thought it might be character building but I thought no you don't want character building on the day will you join yourself well that's over it's time to build some character okay listen just for clarity about the things we put our partners through it was Chloe that found this tree house, wasn't it? Not you. Actually, I found it.

What? Yes. No, what? I know. I know. So that's put you on the back foot. Who are you? Exactly. Who am I? I saw it because I said, I tell you why I saw it. I saw it because I'm about to embark on quite a long drive to Brittany, right, from the, from, from Dieppe. And I said, I'd like to break that up. And Chloe was like suggesting going to, I don't know, staying in other camping sites. And I thought, Well, let's see if there's something different. Anyway, I found the tree houses.

On Airbnb? No, it was just like on a, I don't know what I would. You Google tree houses. I googled unusual campsites or unusual places. Because I was like thinking I'd like to stay like in a caravan, like in like an old gypsy caravan. I don't even know if you're allowed to say gypsy anymore. No, I don't think so. Maybe like all one of those American.

Romani. Romani. Can I say romani? Or like a whole. Hobbity hut. It's a, I don't think you can say hobbity hut. Look, it's fine.

You can. You can say hobbity hut. Well, only if you are a hobbit and you live in Lord of the Rings. I am a hush. I am a hobbit. Was that because you have got quite fairy feet. My point is,

I was doing the research, but, but, and this will now, you'll be able to see, this is now where Chloe's taken over. I said, let's break it out.

We'll have one night in a tree house and then we'll go straight to the, to the campsite where we'll be staying. about, I don't know, four or five days ago, I discover that we're not staying for a night. We're staying for three nights. Oh, that's quite a while.

Yes, so that's changed what is a stopover into another holiday. I said, it's a holiday within a holiday. It's a holiday with a, as she said, I told you that I was going to do that. I said, well, I don't remember. And she said, well, you agreed. And I couldn't then go, oh, yeah, because I just wasn't listening to you. So I had to say, oh, okay, that seems fine. I find this really reassuring that these conversations happen in every relationship.

But I, it was probably, I've, look, I've had to. The relief, the relief to know that all partners don't listen to each other is glorious. I can't, listen, if I'm doing something, you can't talk to me because I'm not, I'm not taking it. But you're always doing something. I'm not always doing something. Sometimes I'm doing nothing. And that's when to get the information about the tree, yow-see. All the information has to happen then.

And Chloe said to me, the only time that you're not doing anything is just before bed. That's when she has to pout. And that's when I shut it down. I go, I can't believe you're talking to me this just before bed. I want to go to sleep. So it is, to be fair, it's quite tricky to have a conversation with food. This holiday sounds magical, babe. I'm so stressed.

I think it'll be fun. And you just got back from Bud of Pest, didn't you? I just got back from Budapest, yeah. Oh shit. I just want to stay at home. No, it'll be fun. It'll be fun. And then when I get back, I'm going straight back on tour.

So I'm going to enjoy myself. So how long are you away for? We're away for two weeks. And you're mostly in Brittany. Mostly in Brittany, yeah, yeah. You're not like popping into Disneyland on the way back or anything. Oh, no. Right.

Sorry, that was very emphatic, but absolutely not. No, no, no. That's something separate. You've got to keep that shit separate. You can't involve that another holiday. We did that one. We drove back. No, we did that.

Exactly that. We drove back from the door, towing from a camping holiday via Disneyland Paris. Do the kids love it? They absolutely loved it. I tell you what? You have these moments, don't you sometimes as a parent where you think, I've smashed it.

I want a badge. And when Elsie waved at Bell in the parade and Bell waved back. Oh, wow. Yeah, that was it. I smashed parenting. I was like, Leave me up. I'm done.

There's nothing more to achieve. Well, now I feel like I've just let my kids down that I haven't actually taken that on at the end. Yeah, you might have to go via DC land. Well, it's a separate holiday and what they don't know won't hurt them. They're going up a tree house and that's almost the same thing. For three nights.

And it's got a toilet. It's got a toilet. It's an incredible opportunity for them to really let their hair down and just have a wild time. I'll be like, keep flushing. Keep flushing. Can you explain the plumbing when you get back? Just thought, what is it, a pipe up a trunk?

What's the sitch? Oh, I'll definitely let you know. I'm hoping it's just not a bucket. And then you just... Even that's better than a tent. I immediately, after sending you those photos, went off, so I sent really shit photos. So, sorry about that.

Why did you think they shit? You know when you just like, I went a bit of photo blind? I got the box of photos out. Okay, that's interesting. And then... Photos can bring up a lot of feelings. Yeah, and then we're sort of...

And then I looked at them again, the next day, and went, you haven't picked the vessels there. But you've got to... gotten now. But it's not about the best ones, is it? And also, I've always thought... I suppose they've got a story. I love looking at a shitty old retro. Any photos from

any photos from pre-smartphones? Yes. Oh, shit. Yes. Yeah. By the very nature that we're taking them and we don't know how to take it. You don't know if it's good or not until you get it back from that. You couldn't adjust it as you go. But there's no excuse for weird... Like, sometimes I look at pictures that we all took through the old system and you're like, I wasn't visually impaired. So why is he so bad?

I think a lot of the time I was taking a picture with a camera thinking that the camera would do everything. Like the camera was going to focus it for me. It was going to like, I forgot that I actually had some control in making that photograph look good because I look at my partner, like Chloe's photos, she's a brilliant photographer and all of her photos look, they look great.

You don't have an eye for it. I've got, I'm not an image person, a words person. Right. Which is why I don't like doing, you know, Instagram videos or anything like that because I'm just not about pictures. I'm about words. I was happier on Twitter than I was on Instagram

and now kind of Twitter's gone weird. Everyone's on Instagram. Yeah, so I'm a bit like, I'm not visuals. But when I have ideas that used to be tweets, I'm now like, well, where do I put them? Because I'm not going to make videos. No, exactly. You make videos.

You've gone by the world. Oh, for God's sake, I don't make videos. All I do is I put up clips of standard. No, I do that, but you do, you do, you make videos. I've seen them. See, with the boys. Oh, well, like, yeah, like, every now and again. I can't be, I can't do it.

I made one the other day, and I watched it back, and I went. So disparaging. That's going straight in the bin. It was positive. Like you could do it. I just can't do it. You're really hilarious. There was one that made me laugh where you took the kids out in the pissing rain

and you were sort of talking. That's making a video. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I mean, but that's easy, that's easy, isn't it? No. I can't do content. It's not easy if you don't think that way. Or you get caught up in watching it.

Oh, I'll do another one. Then I'll do another one. Then it's not natural or thrown away anymore. Then it's shit. Now you have a breakdown. Sit in a wheel bin for an hour. And then get out, call your agent. Why are I doing it?

They're going, you're not making content. And it just goes round. When I get that, when I get that, like, from me, just make more caught. I go, what do you mean? What do you mean? But I am, I'm a stand-up comedian and a writer. Like, I don't have that in my arsenal. Well, that's why Twitter was nice.

Because you could write a joke and put it out. And I just go, I'm like, I could try, but then I do it. And I feel, I feel, I feel like, I don't know how to edit it. I don't know how to edit it. I don't know how to edit because I, I can't remember why I taught myself as with it. It's not, because I've gone by all you, I'm literally going to throw my phone at your head. And then we'll see. Your TikTok sensation, just get over it.

Can you film it? And then let's see if that goes viral. I will. Yeah. And then I might go viral. And then for once, Kerry goes, well, look, Joel's actually offered up his phone. Anything to get this podcast viral.

Anything's getting this podcast started. We've started. We've started. I haven't got a meeting with my accountant. Oh my God. That carpet is, we had that carpet. What I love about that phone. photo is it's got the brown carpet and the brown curtains but they are different browns.

And net curtains as well. And net curtains. Don't see many nets these days. No. But they're different browns. That's what I love about it. We all have to think of that net curtains were in the 80s. They were so hard to keep clean. My mum and dad was anti-me.

Oh really? My mum was really anti-nets. Oh no, we had nets. Your mum was always having nets except us. I got, I got a ship for it. I was like, what do you want? Do you want people to do you? Yeah.

So you're here. So I'm there. Who else is in the picture? So they're three of my cousins. So I've got a ridiculous amount of cousins. I've got like 40-something first cousins. And so they're three of them. And they lived near us.

So they were like my brothers really. So my brother wasn't born until I was 12. I was an only child until I was 12. Right. And I, a weird only child. And then my auntie. Because only children are. You know, that's sort of, I can if I was one.

You can. You can. You can, actually. You can own it. Yeah, I definitely was weird. Because you haven't got that. It's like you're a weird little grown-up. You shouldn't even talk to grow up.

You should have a word only, because only implies negativity. Oh, really? What was I? I don't know. I read an article about it. A single child. That's weird. It's just someone wasn't married. But you're not meant to say only.

Only has a negative connotation. Why does I only have a negative connotation? Only as in that. Or only. It's just, it depends. Someone missing. Well, there is. I'm sorry, but there is.

I can say, because you, I only, I always. I only spoke to adults until I was at school. And so you turn up at school like this weird little grown-up, like who's only ever spoken to adults, really. Right. And, you know, and all my... So you're just very grown up for your age? Yeah, but it comes across as like precocious little weirdo.

Oh, wow. Do you know what I mean? He does. He does. So wait a second, but you must have gone like, even though you're a no... Can't say only. I can't say.

Even though you were a child without siblings. Without siblings, son's siblings, you would have gone to like nursery or, you know, you're hanging out with kids of your age. I think what you didn't learn to do. And all those cousins? Yeah, the cousins were the nearest I had to siblings. We did spend a lot of time with cousins. So that was good. But I think what you learned to do with the sibling is you sort of learn to fight, but you learn to argue, you learn to hold your own.

You learn to share. Yeah. You learn, like, and because you've got parents in common, you sort of have a little ally against your parents to a certain extent. That's true, yeah. Like, for example, my parents split up when I was nine. And this was in the 80s when you didn't explain that to the children. Yeah, right. It's very different now.

I think you sit the children down and you tell them what's happening. I was literally like, oh, your dad's leaving tonight. And I had no sibling to go, what the earth is going on here? And so you end up this kind of very confused, internalised, weird child, I think. You were super smart as well, weren't you? I was quite bright, yeah. And, and, but it was weird, because I think there's this idea that if you were the clever kid at school,

you weren't, you didn't have any friends or you didn't, and it wasn't that. I had loads of friends. And I think because I didn't have siblings, I've always, all my life, I've sort of held on to friends as family. Yeah. Because I think, because my parents split and I was quite young as well, so they went off and had new families.

Right. So I was a bit like, okay, well, I'll just sort of build my own then. Yeah, yeah. You know, and I think my whole life friends have been really. Sorry, I was, sorry. Do you feel like split? Was that it? Or was it that you felt isolated?

A bit of both, I guess, because, like, neither of the, and it's not their fault. Like, it was definitely better with them apart than together. So there was no answer to this. And like I say, different time, you didn't sit down and explain it to the kids or whatever. But it was just, they then both sort of started new families that you weren't quite part of. Do you know what I mean? You weren't quite, you were the sort of odd one in both. The old family.

Yeah. So I think friends were immediately the most important thing. Like I wasn't an unhappy kid particularly. I didn't have a terrible childhood. It had these, it was odd and unusual and, you know, but it wasn't. Because as well in the 80, it wasn't like, you know, being in a family, a divorce family wasn't that common. Oh, I was going to, because where I was, where I grew, it just wasn't that unusual. Yeah.

I felt when I remember that, because it happened during the summer holidays. I remember going back to school and it was all like, oh, Angela's dad. left, you know, and it was all very... I know what you mean. You don't want to be the kid that anything, do you? No. You just want to blend in. You don't want to draw attention to yourself, basically, for anything really.

But my family were so... It's my mum's family, particularly, was so much fun. Like, so they were the sort of refuge from whatever weirdness was going on at home. We'd go to my Auntie Jones house. And my mum, because my mum was one of nine. So I had just aunties and uncles and cousins coming out my ears. You know, they were brilliant. And my auntie Joan particularly,

so those three boys were brothers in that picture and their mum, because she had three boys. And out of my 40 whatever cousins, they were about seven or eight boys, then me, then another seven or eight boys before there was another girl. So there were all these mums that were just desperate to get their hands on a girl. So in that photo, I can tell

it's my auntie Joan and my auntie Christine, two of my mum's sisters, have got older of me. And giving you a side ponytail. And giving me a side pony tail. You rock a side pony. I'm pretty sure I've got blushing on in that picture, which I would not have done,

And you've got quite funky earrings. They've given me clip on earrings. Like, that is not how I went around looking. Do you know what? You look really cute in this picture. And you look happy. Yeah. Like a happy...

I love to be with my family, like my extended family. They were very lucky to have that because... Very. I'm always slightly jealous of big extended families. You know, cousins and all that were in each other's houses. And it just sounds delightful. It was great. And they were...

As an only child as I was then, it did mean I did have... this, and it was, like, my mum, out of her nine siblings, most of them are musicians. So I just thought it was perfectly normal for me that you go around your nan's house on a Sunday and everyone gets guitars out and sings, right? That's just what you, and... Sounds great. I know, it was like the, I used to call us the Von Chavs.

Like, it was, because it was just in my... All sorts. So my uncle, my uncle Bob, he was like in a band in, he was in Hamburg in the 60s when the Beatles were, you know, stuff like that. So they're all, it all been in... And there's still loads of bands in my family and loads of... So I was growing up, going to gigs, growing up going to...

We used to every New Year's Eve. And again, I thought this is just what all families did. Every New Year's Eve, for our New Year's Eve party, we'd hire a village hall. And like the bands of play and the... And I just thought that's what families did. This sounds great. It was amazing. It's unusual.

It's sort of reminding me of when we were talking to Jason Manford about his family and how they... I mean, they used to tour and used to go. on, you know, but it's sort of quite similar. Do you feel like, was it, I don't know, can you, I don't know if you can sort of conflate like, or attach what you do now as a Santa Cmedi to what. It's funny because there's so many, and I mean this in the most lovely way, it sounds like a negative, but there was so many show-offs in my family. Yeah.

But I wasn't really one of them. So my mum, out of the nine of them, she was a quiet one. Right. So she was the one who just watched it all. And obviously, there was nine of them grew up in a three-bedroom council house. Like, it must have been. Chaos. Wall-to-wall chaos.

My mum didn't sleep in a bed on her own until she was 19. Like there was like four of them shared a bedroom, two in each bed or whatever. You know, it was just chaos house. But my mum was sort of always ahead in a book, just let it all go. My mum, to this day, could sit and read a book while World War III's happening around her. Right. That's just what she did. And so, and I think I was a little bit more like her.

So I would just watch it all. I was an observer. And they were so many clowns in my family. Like that's the currency is the way you show affection was to take the piss out of each other And that's a very good thing And it's constant

You know And really funny And I think if you went back to Sort of that time Or maybe a bit later At my nan's house And everyone would be there Like on a boxing day or something

And the place would be full If you said to somebody Right which one of these people In this room is going to turn out To be a professional comedian Nobody would have put the bet on me We know you love the thought of a vacation to Europe.

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She did tell me. She did give me the heads up. She's like, okay, she's gone, let's change the locks, leave the country. Just so you know, I've left, I'm in Ireland. Don't go back to the old house because we don't live there anymore. It was so funny as soon as I left home, like my mum moved to Ireland. And then when I was growing up, I was allergic to dogs, right? And I always wanted a dog.

I'm quite allergic to us, couldn't have a dog. And the minute I left home, both my parents got a dog. I'm like, all right, I'm not coming back. It's fine. I get the hint. Right. Yeah, it would be hard to not be a bit offended. It's a bit harsh, isn't it?

Yeah, that's a bit harsh, isn't it? Yeah, I'll get that message. Got it? Message received. I'm gone, I'm not coming home. So your mum moved to Ireland, and where was your dad? My dad was, oh God, she was all over the place. At that point in Kent probably still, but then he went to Great Yarmouth and open a section.

I mean, this is your day. Right, okay. How did you become a comedian? All right. I'm saying it, yeah. And he's been a big personality in your life. Huge personality in my life. I mean, that picture I've sent you is a weird one because it's sort of,

you know, like when people say to you, what would you say to your teenage self? Or what would you, you know, write a letter to your, it's that girl in that picture I want to shake. Because look how miserable I was desperately unhappy, right? It's fair to say. Oh, you wouldn't know that from the photo. But I, I mean, I thought I was fat. I thought I was hideous.

I thought I was all these things like that. That photo was taken on my birth. Does that look like a girl enjoying her birthday? It was my 19th birthday. You look like you've embraced the goth look. You look younger than 19. If you said to me how old you think I'm in that picture, I wouldn't have said 19. That was my 90th birthday, believe it or not.

14 or 15, I always looked young until I sort of hit 40 and then my face sort of caught up with reality. Why were you unhappy when you were 19? I think I just was confused, you know, all the things we've said already, I was just confused. I was not happy in my own skin. I wasn't. And so when you, I sort of look at that photo and there's not many photos of me as a teenager. I hated having my photo taken.

And genuinely, that photo, my dad, so he'd come to visit me. I was at uni, he'd come to visit me for my birthday with his then wife. And I always refused to have my photo taken. And my dad loved her. In fact, he's holding a camera in that, but he loved taking photos. Yeah. And he literally sat me down and went, look, if you get kidnapped, we've got nothing to give to crime watch.

So you've got to let you take your photo. That's great incentive. And that's what that's photo is. No way. That's your crime watch shot. That's hilarious. And I was like, I'll be in a photo but not on my own. You've got to be in it as well.

But yeah, I never felt like, certainly in my family, I was never the funny one. Like, never the one you would have gone. But you're going to have to have a certain way. You've got a big family that are all very confident. Your dad's got a section. You're going to have to develop a personal. I say I say he opened a sex shop.

That's not what happened at all. So my dad and his then wife had this dream of, We're very, we don't have big dreams in our family. But their dream was to go to Great Yarmouth and open a B&B, which they did. Fair enough. And then my dad started work, I don't know how it came about, I don't like to ask, but started sort of managing the local sex shop. Okay.

Now, again, I don't like to ask too many. Someone's got to manage it. Why not your dad? Exactly. I mean, but I think my dad had quite a lifestyle, should we say. Okay, I can see you're uncomfortable with this. Well, Wait a second.

Okay. Don't unpick lifestyle. It's a lovely euphemism and we're going to stick with it. What the phrase I always use about my dad is, brilliant dad, like the best dad in the world. I missed my dad terribly and he was such a good dad and I was his princess and he was terrible husband.

Terrible. Terrible. You know, and that's... And that's the lifestyle. That's the lifestyle. You know, so I think with my dad, he was diagnosed, so he had type 1 diabetes, but he was diagnosed when he was like seven years old, wasn't he?

And so that would have been in the 50s. And it's not like today where you can have type 1 diabetes and live a relatively normal life except you've got to do, you know, certain things. In those days, it was pretty much like, good luck. Oh, shit. And so he used to inject himself twice a day with insulin, but with old, like, hypodermic needles. He didn't have these sort of things out now.

Yeah, because my mum was type 1 and she used... Like a pen thing. My dad used hypodermics the whole time. Oh my God. And he always wanted to be a paramedic, right? That was his thing he wanted to be. And then he was told he couldn't because of his type one. And of course that wouldn't be an obstacle now.

No, it's a different world. But it was then. And I think at that point, this is what my mum always says about him, when he was told he couldn't do the thing he wanted to do, he just went, well, fuck it then. Right. And like just sort of went, this disease is going to get me eventually, so I'm just going to enjoy myself.

And so in the time when, If he'd looked after himself a bit better, things might have panned out differently. Yeah. He just didn't take any notice of it. So my dad used to have hypoes all the time. And in fact, I used to, so when my parents split up, I'd spend a lot of time just me and my dad, you know, and I was like nine-year-old girl.

And I used to have to, like, I was really well trained in how to deal with my dad having a hypo. So I always had like mini, to me, I still, to this day, can't eat cars. Oh, yeah. It was like mini mars bars are medicine in my head, because they were just what you give dad when he's having a hypo. Right. And I was, I was,

about six and I was at my friend's house and my friend had what I call an angry dad. Right. You know a dad who just shouts a lot and obviously wasn't very happy in his job or whatever. And my dad wasn't like that, but if he was having a hypo, he might shout and get a bit aggressive and that's how he knew he was having a hypo. And she'd just give him a marasbub and then he's fine. And so I was around and I always had marz bars in my pocket and I was round at my friend's house and her dad started shouting and I just went, I've got it, I've got it.

I've got it. I just went to go from a bar bar bar. And how did he do? What did he do? I'll give my dad a Mars bar when this happens and they're all right. I bet it did it come in down. I don't know why Mars didn't use it as a campaign. Calm your dad down.

Chill out, mate. Have a Mars bar. Mars a day keeps your angry dad away. My dad when he had a hypo would act like a child. But he's growing, you know, I remember once being in... That's a lot for a kid to witness, though. It's a lot, but it's sort of funny. Like, I remember being...

That's a coping strategy. I was about 12. And we were in London. We'd gone for a day trip to London. me and my dad and we're walking along somewhere I can't even remember where and I could see

he would get these little beads of sweat on his forehead and I was like oh here we go quick better and I was like trying to go dad you got any marse balls and he just starts giggling I could try it like oh jeez oh jeez

so so I saw a news agent so I sort of got him into the news agent like that and I went and got a mask box because I didn't have any on me or something and I was trying to get the money

out of his pocket to pay for it. So finally, so we're doing that and he's like slapping me away and giggling. And the poor bloke behind the counter is like, what's going on here? And then I got the money out and I went and bought the Mars bar

and I turned around and he's just got a magazine off the top shelf and he's just like Oh my! That's a lot for it. Angela. Angela, you're telling that this is not as an outsider, that's too much for a kid to do with it.

I was so mortified. Yes. And this poor guy behind the counter is like everything on my I was like, yeah, just trying to get his magazine. And I'm full of snatch when he's just trying to... How old were you? I was feeling about 11 or 12 then. Oh my God.

Peak, puberty. Yeah. It's coming up for... Yes. But also scary when they're having a hypo because, you know, like if you don't get the sugar in them, you can slip into a coma.

Do you know what I mean? It's a lot of responsibility for times. Yeah, but I grew up with that. Like, that was just always there. And so, you know, never felt like it was a responsibility. It was just, and they used to call them, like, hypers were wobblies when I was little.

Dad's having a wobbly. And like I said, I just thought all dads have wobblies. That was just part of being in that. But there was so many codes for things that we now know in the world we're living in now. Yeah. We can go, okay. We weren't brilliant at child psychology or blah, you know, it's like these are just euphemisms and coping techniques.

There was some real, there was when I was a bit older, I was about 17. And I had this friend. and my dad was single at the time and her mum was single so maybe we were a bit younger about 16 and we got it in our heads like we get them together

we're sisters brilliant that'd be great that'd be great so I spent Christmases together it'd be brilliant so I said to my dad my dad was like oh can Vicky and her mum come for dinner one night

and my dad was like yeah alright fine you know I had no idea I'm trying to you know we've got this idea So I invited we invited them around for dinner and my dad's cooking dinner, I'm helping my dad cook dinner, and I could see he started to have a hypo, right?

So I got these digestive biscuits out, and I'm trying to feed them to him. And I hadn't noticed. They were no sugar. Digested biscuits. Why has your dad got no sugar? Oh, it's probably, because he's a bit. Yeah.

So he's eating them, of course, nothing's happening. And I'm like, they're going to be here any minute. They're going to be here any minute. He's just giggling, like, because he just gets, he would get really childlike when he had a hypo. And it's like a drunk, you know, just but really silly.

And I was like, oh God. And then the doorbell rings so they've arrived, right? So I'm like, just eat some biscuits. I went and opened the door. And they came in. And I knew my friend's mum fairly well, but not, you know, I met her a few times.

I've been around there for dinner, whatever. Yeah. They came in. And my dad just went to her, just came out. And I thought, oh, he looks all right. He must have had the biscuits or whatever. He must be starting to get the biscuits in, whatever.

And he just went to her, take a seat. And she sat down and whipped the chair. Oh, my God. And it was just laughing. I was like, do it. Oh my God. And then you try to explain to somebody who doesn't know anything about diabetes.

She's like, I'm really sorry. And I was like, let me try to explain what so. She's like, no, no, no, it's fine. Oh my God. I'm trying to explain what had just happened. Did you manage to get any sugar into your... I managed to get... And you explained to her that point

that they were sugar-free. Because I'd seen he'd eat in a load. I'm like, why isn't this working? I was like, oh, they're fucking sugar-free. So I think I just made him an orange squash with loads of sugar in or something like that way. You go in there and drink that. Deal with you in a minute.

Did they get together? No. Oh, you actually were wondering what the ending of that was. Maybe it was a romantic outcome. This is a very unusual wrong com. That was their meat cute. Yes, I've compacted my spine. When can I see you again?

So this picture with you and Michael, is this you starting out? That's my sort of, I wanted a picture that represented comedy because this sounds so... I love this picture. This is just represented backstage. Doesn't it? So this was taken in Edinburgh, backstage in Edinburgh, in 2012. He both looked very young.

The reason I've chosen that photo is, like Michael Fabri is my best mate in comedy. Like I knew him because I booked him before I started doing stand-up. So he's been on the whole journey with you. He's my entire journey with me. And when I do, you know, he writes with me. He's my mate. And in fact, he's like my brother,

because we fight like brother and sister. Like, we really bicker, Michael and like it's brilliant. And I remember once we, I can't remember who it was. We had a young comic. We were doing a road trip to a gig somewhere. And Michael was driving. I was like in a,

it was quite a long journey. And we had this young comic in the back we didn't really know. Michael and I were talking about something and ended up bickering about something. This comic went, I feel like I'm on the last family holiday before the divorce. That's exactly what our relationship is.

We love each other, but we also like, fuck you actually. But I bet you get some good comedy out of that. Get some really good stuff out of it. And, you know, he's just outside of him. He's just a really good guy, but he's such brilliant comedian. Yeah, he is. She's got this incredible brain, but he's funny when he tries to be, and even funnier when he doesn't.

I tell you why I like the look of this photo, is that neither of you look jaded. Yeah, you make it look cool. You actually look like, A, you want to be there, B, whatever you've just done, or we can't share. That year, you're going to enjoy it. I know what I was doing that year, because it was 2012, so I wasn't doing it. I hadn't done my first solo show at that point. There you go, that's why you're enjoying it. two-hander. It was me and Matt Richardson

doing a two-hand on the free fringe. And we just had the best time. We just rock up, do our show to a full room to get free fringe and then get pissed and then do it again the next day. No stakes are because you're still a beginner and no one was reviewing us. I remember going, I'm just here to learn. Yeah. To fail.

Learn. 2000 and 2002 are my favourite Edinburgh because I literally was just going up there to do like 10s or 2000 I was doing spots 2002 I was doing a competition and I had two weeks on a package show and it was really fun and I just had such a lot

I remember doing an open spot at 3 o'clock in the morning at Pear shaped and when I went down there I went can I get some stage time and he went yeah I can put you on at 3 I was like 3 tomorrow and he went no 3 to night

so I just sat and drank yeah it's the one and only told I've ever been on stage blind drunk like I couldn't can you imagine if someone says to you yeah you can get on at 3 am

am you'd be like well you can literally no absolutely not there was a year so that was 2012 I think there was 2010 I just started doing stand-up. So I was going up anyway. So I used to go up to Edinburgh and tech other people's shows

so that I would have a reason to be there. And then I was just doing open sports. Yeah. And so I did the Jill Edwards course in 2009. And then I didn't do a gig for about six months because I was so nervous. Yeah. So worried about it.

And then I sort of started gigging a bit in 2010. And then in Edinburgh that year, I was doing some open spots. But because I knew so many comedians, hadn't told anyone that I knew. So the comics in Brighton knew, but the likes of like Acaster and Josh and all of that, I just hadn't told them because I was so, like,

you know, felt so weird. Totally makes sense. You want to be under the radar? Yeah, exactly. So I did this open spot while I was there, and it was Nish Kumar was hosting it. Yeah. And I knew Nish because in 2010 I checked a show,

like a sketch show that some friends of his were in. And so he said, I'll come and do an open spot. So I went And Josh was headlining Josh Whitacum And I was at the gig And it was on one of these Weird little venues

Free Fringe venues on Cowgate And I went in And Josh hadn't arrived I was like brilliant I can just get up and do this And get out before he even gets here And you'll have no idea That I did this

And literally Nish called me on stage And I saw Josh walking With James Acaster As I was going on And I saw them look at me Like what the fuck you doing As I'm walking on stage

And I did it It was like a 10 minute spot And I did it It was fine. It was good. It was whatever. And about a week later in Edinburgh, I saw James and he was really pissed. And he just went, we were so fucking happy. You weren't shit. We were just like, what are we going to say if she's shit? What are we going to do?

In comedy speak, that's a massive compliment. Yeah, yeah, exactly. You weren't shit. You were saying you weren't shit. Yeah, I mean, it sort of feels like a backhandic. But you can feel how nervous they must have been. Yeah, because, you know what is this about then? This is your story. You know what I mean?

And there's always that thing when you're, when you've got a relationship with someone and you're invested in them and then they go up and do a gig and you're like, oh my God, I don't know how I'm going to talk to you if this is shit? How are we going to lock eyes? She gives us loads of gigs.

We're going to have to still be nice to her. We're going to have to say stuff like, oh, the lighting was good. Do you know how are you going to get past that? It's a miracle that anyone gets up there at all. Look, just for people listening, okay, so we just can I rewind just a tad? Yeah.

So we're not talking about, Angela's career. Okay, so Angela starts doing stand-up comedy. She is immediately quite good, okay? Right, everybody listening? Sorry if my voice has gone up at the end. Okay. So, and is, is, some might say, strutting around, being very good on the circuit,

very quickly picking up 20s, very quickly picking up the big clubs, moving very fast through, like a hot knife through butter, actually. Did you get curb quite early on as well? I got curb. Fairly early, yeah. And then, okay, you get very early on your first television show. And it's not a one-off on a panel. No, it's not, actually.

Sorry. Is there helium in the room? It appears to be helium. Sorry. No, it is a full-blown series called Stand Up for the Week. I think how many series did... It had several, but I did the one that ended it. Hang on, Angela, you do what you do, which is to underplay.

Angela, it doesn't matter. You got on this, it was a show that all of us as comics wanted to get. It was a very difficult show to get to get. And you fucking got it. And not only did you get it, you were good on it. Thank you. You were really good on it because I watched it. And it was, I feel like sometimes people get opportunities and they get them too soon.

Yeah. And then you think, do you know what, if you just had a little bit of time to cook, you would have been, But how the fuck were you good so early? I'll tell you what? What's the secret? So here's the thing. I never do anything until I'm more than ready. Right.

So what a lot of people do when they start doing stand-up is you go to people, yeah, I've got a 10 when you haven't. You've got a 5 that you need to pad. As you go along, you do your 5 that you need to pad, and obviously you have a shit gig, and then they don't book you again for two years. Whereas if you go, yeah, I've got a 10 when you've actually got 15 and you're more than ready to do a 10, then you'll go and do a blinding 10, and then you'll move to doing 15's 20s really. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah.

I think it's actually my over-cautiousness is what got me going quickly because I wouldn't do anything until I felt I was ready. And often I felt I was ready a lot longer after I was. Right. So, like, for example, my agent, who I've now had for 10 years, is brilliant. Like, his job is managing my career and me.

You are ready to last agent. And he's really good at knowing when to push me and when not to. Like, when to go, I remember when they asked me to be a regular, or Mock the Week. So it went from, you know, I'd do one or two a series or whatever, so they want you to do four a series. Yeah. And I got that call for my agent, and I, I, like, went, well, I can't,

I'm not good enough. Like, I'm not, I'm not experienced enough, I'm not this, that, and the other. And he literally went, yeah, they're not asking you because they feel sorry for you. Like, you know, they're not, they're asking you because they wouldn't ask you if they didn't think you could do it, you know. Let's not unpack.

They asked a woman to be a regular. I was just going to lock the week. Angela, they really didn't have to do that if they felt out. We can't end on talking about comedy. No, I'm already doing the next photograph. Kerry Goddman. It's a happy one. Look how I've pushed it forward.

I've been pushing it forward. I love this. He's like a married couples. We're really working together as a team in this fucking podcast. No, Kerry, you do it. No, you do it. Yeah, it's fine. You do it.

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That's annoying. What? You're a muffler. You don't hear it? Oh, I don't even notice it. I usually drown it out with the radio. How's this? Oh, yeah.

Way better. Save on insurance by switching to Bel Air Direct and use the money to fix your car. Bell Air Direct, insurance, simplified. Conditions apply. Tell us about your last photo, Radula. So my last photo is a photo from my wedding. I hope so, because otherwise you look for a bit...

I'm overdressed. Otherwise. So there was, I thought I wanted a wedding photo because they're nice and, you know. And I love this photo, not just because it's got everyone in it, like everyone that came to the wedding, but because obviously the photographers told them to shout something. And it's made loads of them look like sex dolls. Because everyone else, like, look at Juliet Myers in the front. She looks like a sex doll.

I love it. Oh, my God. That's so true. Juliet. Oh, bless her. I love it. That is a great picture. It looked like a bloody good do.

It was such, well, do you know what? I would recommend, if you're thinking about getting married, anyone listening, do it at the end of a global pandemic. Because we got married in September 2021. And so we had about 200 people. And all, like, they were so ready for a party. Like, these people hadn't been out for a year and a. Yep, they looked like they're ready for a party.

And it was just, we did the wedding, we had the ceremony. And then we just, it was like a festival style thing. We had a tent in the field. And the sun came out. It was beautiful weather. What a lovely bunch. And then everyone camped over. Yeah.

And so we had a George Egg made us breakfast the next morning for everyone that can. He's good at cooking. He's really good at cooking. Check out his Instagram page. And it was just a big party. And we weren't, we had pie and mash. It was really sort of. And also looking at the photograph, just a lovely bunch of people.

So many nice people. Nice dress as well. Lovely dress. Both of you and Matt, you look so gorgeous together. It was such a fun. Like, I love that picture because it's just got everyone I love in it pretty much. The only sad thing is, well, several sad things. One is my family in Newfoundland couldn't come because they still weren't allowed to fly.

So there's obvious people missing there. And the other side that I think you guys both know this, and I'm about to really bring the mood down, but it's that my lovely friend, Phil Gerard, died that morning. And so it was... I forgot actually it was the same day. That is massive. It was quite a lot.

It was quite a lot. And but, so that, those two things are forever in twines, you know. But I'm really good friends with his wife. And we sort of, she, because what happened, I got the, because obviously Phil had been very poorly and we knew that there wasn't going to be a good outcome. But we didn't know when it was going to happen and not that. And it was sort of a couple of days, two days before that wedding day, we had to, except we had a humanist wedding.

So we had to go and do the legal bit separately in a registry office. Yeah. So that was just me and my husband and we had his best man, a guy called Andy and his wife and Michael Fabry and his girlfriend. They were our witnesses. That was it, just four of them. And we just went to the registry office,

did the thing they witnessed it, we went and had lunch. And I got a text from Beck that said, so Phil had taken a turn for the worst that week, really, and was at home about having palliative care. I got a text from Beck that day, while we were having lunch, actually, that said, I think you should come now.

and see Phil. So we just, me, Michael and Matt, my husband and Fabry got in a car, just got a cab, left the rest of him to pay the bill, he's got in a cab and went straight up to see him. So, because Phil was, was going to be a witness that day, you know, he was, that was, and we went to see, so he knew that we'd got married, that we were, you know, that day. And I spent some time with Phil that day, just sort of made sure, I said everything that I wanted to say, just, you know. And then the next day, the Friday, we were sort of busy, because this wedding

was, like I said, we just hired a field and we had to put everything in it, like toilets, generators, you know. So it was like a big project management thing the day before, so I was up at the field the next day. And I spoke to his wife and she said, oh, he seems to have poked up a bit today, he's having a good day. And I was like, great, that's brilliant.

Yeah. And so what our plan was was between the wedding ceremony and the party, party that because we had the little wedding car that we'd do a little detour going around to see Phil so we could see us in our finery you know whatever and then I woke up on it was about 6 o'clock in the morning I was waking up

my mum was sleeping in my bedroom me because we've only got a little flat and I had all the bridesmaids stay in and everything's chaos and so so I woke up at like 6 in the morning and I'd got a text from Beck at about 20 past 5 that just said and it literally just said he's gone and I was just like fuck what do we

you know, we can't have a wedding. What on earth do we do? And I just didn't. And then, I think it was Beck's sister texted me and said, because Beck obviously, we knew Beck was, her family were with her, so she was taking care of. And actually, it's really weird because we, if it hadn't been my wedding day that that happened,

I don't know what we would have done. Had you had a conversation with him or Matt that that might happen because it was all feeling close. I just hadn't let myself think that would happen on that day. But also you just had a conversation where Beck had said he's having a... He's hurt a better day the day before. Apparently, I've seen heard that happen sometimes. Yeah.

Yeah. But... Man, it's just huge, isn't it? And so I sort of... Yes, right. I got another message that just said you have to go and smash this wedding. Like, Phil would be really upset if you didn't. And I was like, you're right.

It's really hard to explain because it was the happiest day in my life and one of the saddest at the same time. There's something fortuitous almost about them being in the same day. Yeah. Yeah. And actually it meant he was part of the wedding. He was part of it. He was in our speeches.

He was, you know. And forever, like now, you know, he's forever part of your wedding. Yeah. And he's in, and also, I suppose, when you're looking at that photograph, Phil isn't there, but he's there. Yeah. You know, so he'll always be part of your, a part of this wedding photo. Yeah.

And there's something about that that. Yeah. I mean, it's. He's not there, but he's there. Yeah. So it's sort of. happy, it's like a happy side. Yeah. It's a really hard one to explain.

There's so many mixed moments. Because I think about my wedding day, the wedding, how brilliant it was. But also I think what it did was it really made it mean something. Like I don't know if that would have happened anyway. Yeah. But like for Matt and I, it was all the, you know, the catering, the cake, the whatever else.

None of it really mattered. Like, I wouldn't have given enough shit that day if the caters hadn't turned up, we'd had to get pizza. Weddings are weird things for sort of modern times because they're really in something almost medieval but you enter into the spirit of it and the spirit of it is love and friendship and then of course Phil fits into that exactly and it just made us go

like they're so Phil and his wife was such an amazing blueprint for a marriage that it just made you go that's what we're aspiring to and also like this is what this is the promise we're right and this is how it could end in a really horrible way but we're still doing that you celebrate friendship live they're meant to be. Yeah.

Exactly. It's all in twice. It's all part of the same thing. It's all made sense somehow. Yeah, no, that does make sense. It's perspective, isn't it? Like, his wife said to me, like the following week and I rang her. And she just went, it's quite a fucking mic drop from your support act, didn't it?

Upstaging me till the end. You have used comedy a lot in your life to deal with stuff. I think comedy and trauma are interlinked. Quite interlinked in my life. But I think they are for all of us. They are for all of us. Show me a comedian that's not at a tough time. I haven't.

I haven't got any of the extra you're at a tough time. Yeah, and you're very well balanced. Sorry, can we turn the levels down on my headphones? Thank you. Thank you, Barbara. It's really fun. We ought to say that Angela was actually on tour at the moment and if you get a chance to see her, she's on fire.

I've heard this show is absolutely brilliant. I'm going to go and see it for this next leg of this tour. She always cracks me up. She's brilliant. I'm going to, I really wanted to see her in Brighton, actually. She's at the dome on the 3rd of October, and I really wanted to see her. But sadly, because of my blinking tour, I can't go. But if you get a chance to see her, check out her website, Angela Barnes,comedy.com.

It's got all of her dates on there. And please do buy a ticket. You won't be disappointed. Segway Queen, here we go. I won't walk all over your Seg now. Now that you know the Queen of Sex is a surprise. You should hold a sign up. I'm doing a seg, so I won't just trample on it.

Here we go. Right, Kerry, I'm doing a seg. You ready? Ready. Three, two, one. Angela, do you know? I can't fucking believe it. I'm not going to be ready to answer because I know this isn't going to have for age.

Well, I mean, I don't even know if this seg will ever fucking, right, okay. Are we ready? Right, put it up. There's no sign there, but imagine it. Oh, Jesus. Right, here we go. Sigloy. Angela, you've got a podcast.

What? That is a great seg. I don't like that. It is. It is. It was brilliant. It was brilliant. No wonder you've gone viral.

It's like being in a master class. Right. So, perhaps you can't even like to introduce this little bit? What's your podcast about? So I do a history podcast, but it's history for people who think they don't like history. It's called We Are History.

You're a right old history nerd. I'm a bit of history nerd. But certain types, like, sort of kings and queens and princesses and that don't really float my boat. You like bunkers. I like bunkers. And, you know, a bit of Cold War, all that sort of gritty stuff.

Soviet stuff. I don't know. I always think with the princesses and princes of key and medieval history and all of that. I don't know where that ends and fairy tales begin. Right. Do you know, Princess and the P? Was that real? No.

I don't know. Yeah, no, I did Princess and the P in history. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's part of the Judas, isn't it?

After the prince is in the tower, then you do the princess and the Pee. That's right. Yeah. That's a real thing. Yeah. But I do it with John O'Farrell who. brings a little bit more kudos to it than I do. Is he an actual historian? Neither of us are actual

historians. He's a comedy writer and he like writes musicals now. He just put, Mrs. Doubtfire the musical he wrote that. Is that a real story? That's a real story. Yeah, that's a real story. Yeah, definitely. As is chicken run, which he's also written. And we so we sort of just

pick things that we find interesting, read the books about them and then do a podcast about it. And they're quite lighthearted and quite fun. Is it that whole whole whole history's for grown-ups? Basically yes. You can, you're listening, you're laughing. You're learning. Yeah, there you go.

No one's doing any of those on our podcast. We need to work on that. No one's learning anything. If anything, this is going to reduce your IQ. I'm Max Rushton. I'm David O'Dardy. And we'd like to invite you to listen to our new podcast. What Did You Do Yesterday?

It's a show that asks guests the big question. Quite literally, what did you do yesterday? That's it. That is it. Max, I'm still not sure. Where do we put the stress? What did you do yesterday? What did you do yesterday?

You know what I mean? What did you do yesterday? I'm really down playing it. Like, what did you do yesterday? Like, I'm just a guy just asking a question. But do you think I should go bigger? What did you do yesterday? What did you do yesterday?

Every single word this time I'm going to try and make it like it is the killer word. What did you do yesterday? Like that's too much, isn't it? That is, that's over the top. What did you do yesterday? Available wherever you get your podcasts every Sunday.