Mick Unplugged - Bonus Episode 6 | Carlester Crumpler: A Legacy of Resilience and Service - Mick Unplugged

Episode Date: April 30, 2024

In this deeply personal episode, Mick Hunt talks with Carlester Crumpler about his journey from professional sports to meaningful community leadership. Carlester shares the profound lessons from his experiences on and off the field, emphasizing the importance of family, humility, and serving others. His story is a testament to the power of transforming personal trials into a legacy of positive impact.Carlester Crumpler's Background: Transition from an NFL athlete to a role model and leader in community and family life.Defining Moments: Insights into Carlester's profoundly personal and spiritual reflections following significant changes, including his journey through grief and personal discovery.Discussion Topics:Reflections on the influence of family legacy and the values instilled by his parents.The importance of humility, service, and community in his post-NFL life.Challenges and personal growth through life's transitions, including the significant impact of losing loved ones.Key Quotes"Presence is more important than performance.""Encourage, equip, and empower people to wholeness."Next Steps:Reflect: Consider how Carlester's insights on life beyond professional sports can inspire your personal and professional growth.Engage: Share your stories of overcoming challenges and serving your community using #MickUnplugged.Connect: Follow Carlester Crumpler's ongoing community projects and support his initiatives. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Are you ready to change your habits, sculpt your destiny, and light up your path to greatness? Welcome to the epicenter of transformation. This is Mic Unplugged. We'll help you identify your because, so you can create a routine that's not just productive, but powerful. You'll embrace the art of evolution, adapt strategies to stay ahead of the game, and take a step toward the extraordinary. So let's unleash your potential. Now, here's Mick. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another episode of the Mick Unplugged podcast, where we delve beyond the surface of why to uncover the profound because that fuels our

quest and defines our legacies. Today, we're honored to host a remarkable individual whose life is a testament of adaptation and resiliency. From catching passes on the football fields of the NFL to navigating new challenges beyond the gridiron, he embodies the spirit of transformation and tenacity. His journey from All-American tight end at East Carolina University to a life of impactful leadership off the field is nothing short of inspiring.

Get ready to be moved, get ready to be motivated by my friend, Carl Lester Crumpler Jr. Carl Lester, how you doing, brother? Doing well, Mick, and yourself. Thanks for having me on. You're doing great. Man, this is crazy, right?

So, you know, your younger brother, Algie, is one of my really good friends. I met you when I was at Carolina. And I can say this now, and I mean this from my soul. The first time I saw you, I didn't know a human being could be as big and powerful as Carl Lester. I don't know about powerful. I remembered working out with you guys. I think my brother was a freshman.

Dre Bly was there. And I was just kind of doing some out with you guys. I think my brother was a freshman, Dre Bly was there and I was just kind of doing some laps with you guys. And he said, come on, old man. I was just kind of like taking it easy on you guys. And then I decided I would turn it up just a little bit. It's amazing to see how a lot of the guys that were on the teams that my brother played with, how they transitioned once they left Carolina and played in the NFL and done other great things, both personally and professionally. So definitely an inspiration. You were that for me. And again, I mean that from my soul, man. You've been an inspiration. You were someone I looked up to when I was in

college, listening to you and Algie talk after some of your games and how you're inspiring him, not in football, but just in life to keep going and to always prepare yourself to be the best version of yourself. Those are things that stuck with me. So I want to personally tell you thank you for those conversations. Well, I definitely appreciate that. We've had some big shoes to fill, you know, footsteps to follow in my dad and the things that he did athletically and just in life in general. But it's interesting how, you know, a lot of our conversations rarely have ever been about football. This is really been about life, the responsibilities that we have to show up as men, as husbands, as fathers, as leaders, as servants. And I think a lot of that just really goes back to the roots that start, you know, with our parents. But it even goes, as leaders, as servants. And I think a lot of that just really goes back to the roots that start with our parents, but it even goes far back to our grandparents as well.

I love it. On our podcast, we talk about looking deeper than why. I love Simon Sinek's start with why, but I think your because is kind of what fuels us, right? We almost always can identify someone's why, but it's that because it's that driving force that really separates i'm going to say the good from the great and the great from the elite for you what is your because or what what's one of your becauses that's fueled you to dedicate your life both on and off the field yeah you know and i appreciate that question and and i i love that shift uh to take things a little bit deeper beyond beyond just the why. And I think when you get beyond the why into that, because it really opens you up, not not for honesty or transparency, but actually vulnerability.

Right. And there's risk associated with that and allowing people into that space of what drives you and motivates you. But I always kind of felt like football was going to be a part of my life. I didn't, I wasn't expiring to be a pro football player, but just loved the idea of competing and being with my friends, right? You know, just that competitive drive was forged, you know, in my early years and, you know, the pickup ball that you play, you know, that competitive drive was forged you know my my early years and you know the pickup ball that you play you know with you with the other neighborhoods right and you know you go home with the with the scrapes and you cry a little bit maybe even got ridiculed you know some but I just grew up with such a distinct name that was just you know it wasn't it wasn't Rodney wasn't

Michael you know wasn't Adam it was Carl, wasn't Michael, you know, wasn't Adam. It was Carl Lester. And typically when people said my name, they would stop because of, you know, I'm named after my father. Right. And, you know, I think in many ways, just what he represented was greatness in so many different things. And so for me, it's just really about that drive to live a purposeful and meaningful life, a life that actually means something. And it's just interesting that, you know, several years ago, I had an opportunity to do an exercise of, you know, what did Stephen Covey say? The second habit began with the end in mind, right? And the exercise is to write your own obituary.

And, you know, I started writing my obituary with a group of guys and we were going through this exercise. And when I went back and looked at what I wrote, there wasn't much about football there. It was about the impact on people within my domain, my family, my spouse, my children, my siblings, my niece, you know, my nieces and nephews. But then also the people that I've been fortunate to come across or people have come across my path over the years. That's amazing. And I went through that exercise as well. So I know exactly what you're talking about. And when it was over, I always just asked myself, well, what's one thing I fear? Because I always felt like I never feared anything, right? But after completing that exercise, what I realized I feared was I don't want to pass and meet the person I was supposed to be since that moment. That's been a

driving factor for me. Right. Like, and I know you're very spiritual as well. Does that resonate with you at all? Right. It's like when you pass, like what if you met the person you were supposed to be? And that's what pushes me forward every day is to be that better version because I don't want to meet the person I was supposed to be. Yeah. Well, yeah, that's deep. You know, one of the things that me and my brothers, we're all going through right now and have been over the past, you know, five months now or four or five months now is just grieving the loss of our mom. I had to write her obituary. First draft took me six hours, six hours. And I spoke about that at her funeral. I just said, you know, to the elders in the room, I said, do your children a favor and at least write something

down on paper, you know, just so, cause that was a task because it's like, you know, how do you how do you honor the life always love my, have always loved my mom and appreciated what she's done. But I could see where there are some aspects of what she brought and gave that I did not value or appreciate as much. And there's lessons that I'm getting it in a way that's really driving me and motivating me in a way that's just different than anything that has ever driven or motivated me in my life. Because what I shared at her homegrown service was my mother was rich in relationships. That was her currency. That was her currency. And there were some guys that you played ball with, my brother did, and they came and visited in Charlotte and in Wilson. I mean, you could just see it on their faces. And it's just like, I didn't know my mom still stayed in contact with a lot of these guys through text, through email, through voicemail,

and everything. And she was a big encourager. She was a mom to many. Right. I mean, that's who she became known as. And she loved that role. But that role was just who she was. She wasn't trying to do anything. She was just being the fullness of who God had made her to be. That's right. So you've talked about learning some things about yourself since that moment. What are some of the things that you've learned about you in the last four, four and a half months? Well, I am my mother's son, you know, in many ways, but you know, I've been so driven, you know, big into performing. I think so much about the life of an athlete and even someone in sales is about performance-based acceptance, right? And that's just something that I've really been challenged by over the years, because I just feel like I have to do, do, do, do, do. Didn't really

know or understand what it meant to just be, right? That's just different. And my brother and I had a conversation the week that we were trying to get my mom's affair squared away. And my brother can be pretty tenacious and spirited, but I don't think he's ever seen me as locked in as I was that week. I mean, even he said that I had done more than enough. And, you know, I kind of get emotional when I when I think about it, because it was a powerful conversation that just between two brothers who love each other dearly. But I don't think we've ever had that kind of dialogue with one another. And I just said, look, I just want to honor mom's life and legacy and make sure that we send her off the right way. And he was just like, you know what? You've done more than enough.

But the thing that really sparked that conversation was, Mick, that we went to visit my dad briefly before we went to the funeral home. And my dad just looks at me and I'm exhausted. Right. I'm just exhausted and mentally and emotionally just exhausted. And he looks at me and my dad's never called me a name in my life. And he called me a bulldog. And I'm just looking at him like just so perplexed. Like what? And he looks at me and he goes, you're just powering this thing on through, ain't you? And I go, yeah, yeah. That's who I am. I just power things on through. I'll put the team on my back. I'll do whatever it's going to take to just put us in the best position to win or achieve the outcomes and results. But what I realized after my dad said that, or at least several hours later, and in a conversation with my dad, there's a level where it could just go a little bit too far and be a little bit too much to where it's taking a toll where you're paying

a price that's not worth it to pay. Shortly after that, about a week or two later, and this has just been like just where I am and what I'm processing. You know, I heard this guy say presence is more important than performance. And I just chewed on that. You know, then I went to a men's retreat and, you know, it was a spiritual retreat. Men, you know, learn how to grow and mature as far as our leadership and our service to our family, within our faith and community. And the question was, what's God saying to you? You know, I went for a walk for a couple of hours, came back, and I'm like, man, I didn't hear a thing. But then I sit down and we're getting ready to get started and it all came. And what I was hearing God say to me, he reminded me that

presence is more important than performance. You no longer need to perform or do. I want you to rest, trust, and be. And so I chewed on that, but I didn't know what to do with it. And over a series of weeks, it all came together to where presence is more important than performance. No longer need to perform or do, but I want you to rest in God's love for you. I want you to trust God for your life and for the direction of your life. And I want you to be present, be still, be yourself, be strong and be courageous. I'm getting touched right now, man. Like this is like, I think I actually needed that message. I needed that message. Forget podcasts and all that. Like I needed that message today.

Awesome. I'm getting emotional. Like I needed to hear everything that you just said. So why did you need to hear it? You know, so much in an amazing way is happening in my life, right? Like, you know, I'm doing a lot with Les Brown, who's one of my personal mentors. So doing speaking engagements, we're working on an executive leadership mastermind, my consulting business. It's you're in the financial space, right? So it's conference season, right?

So it's a ton of travel. But in the back of my mind every day, I still have to be present for those that need me, for those that are sitting on my shoulders right now. And I needed like everything that you just said, especially the last part, just be like I needed all of that. My mom's going to call me in a minute and yell at me, too, because she's been calling me like every day. And I'm like, all right, mom, I'll call you back in the morning. I'll call you. She's about to yell at me. So this is for you, mama. Promise. Well, I tell you what, and just speaking of your mom, like I'm in sales business development. And, you know, two years ago, 2022, you know, I had a career year and, you know, felt really good about my performance, my leadership, how I serve, the impact, the influence, and even the recognition was good. But then last year elevated the performance where it was 6X what it was in 2022.

Good. 6X. Okay. And I was doing what I do, what I've been gifted to do. Like I didn't feel like I was acting outside of myself. I was learning. I was growing. I was being challenged, leading, serving. You know, it wasn't all about me, but that whole mindset of I need to carry the team. I need the shoulder, the load. And I paid a price. I didn't make time for my family the way that they needed from me and I

needed a vent. And so here it is, you know, Mick, the week of Thanksgiving was the first time I had taken time off from work since June. And that was way too long. And I was exhausted to the point where I didn't want to go anywhere. I didn't want to do anything. I didn't even want to go grocery shopping for Thanksgiving. And speaking of moms, my mom, she was kind of like having some health challenges and she sent a text and said that she wasn't going to be able to come to Atlanta just because she didn't feel like she could make that drive. And my wife had mentioned the idea of potentially going to Charlotte to visit my mom and just take Thanksgiving to her. But I was just so exhausted. It was just like, just couldn't really do it. And then a week and a half later after Thanksgiving, my mom passes away. You know, I missed out on an opportunity.

I fortunately was able to talk to my mom, you know, a day and a half before she passed. My brother was with her, you know, different challenge in and of itself. But just the way things played itself out, you know, I just I have a greater appreciation for like making the most of the opportunities that are right in front of you and not allowing myself to be too busy for the people that really, really, really matter in my life, especially the people that I know needed to hear, man. Like, you know, recently married and my wife who I've known for a while, but she knows the work ethic, right? She knows the grind and it's a certain thing that you can't kind of turn off and you have to take a step back to realize like, yeah, there's multiple things that I have to be able to do. And there's people that need all of me and it's just one of me, right? I know you totally get that, but I needed this today. Like I have to take time for those that matter. So this is personal. So for everybody that's listening, that's, that's in my circle, Carl Lester's making me take the time.

You know, we talked about the, because I have a purpose statement that I'm still chewing on as far as what does that look like lived out? But the thing that I may be realizing more and more when I have conversations with different people is maybe I'm living out my purpose and my calling, but haven't fully recognized it as such. is to encourage, equip, and empower people to take ownership of their lives and maximize their God-given potential in order to win back their communities, families, and their personal lives. And a shortened version of it is to encourage, equip, and empower people to wholeness. But being a man of faith, just to cut to the chase, no one can become whole apart from Christ. That's true. He has to be the center of, he just can become whole apart from Christ. That's true. He has to be the center of, he just can't be a part of, he has to be the center of, you know, when you look at

people that have things that we think we want or aspire to have or achieve, but then when you see or hear about the insecurity or just the manner in which they operate and how they treat people and talk about people. And you think about who you are and what you want to represent. It's like, I don't think I really want that. But the thing is, in order to transform our families, in order for our families to transform our communities and for our communities to be transformed, it all starts with us. It's not about us pointing the finger to somebody else. We'll look at what they do. And if they know we need to make those decisions for ourselves. And in many ways, we aren't good enough to save ourselves. We try, right. You know, and we seek to achieve. And I've accomplished a whole lot of things, but I was just like, man, there's something about fulfillment. I had someone ask me, you know, if we're not living to be happy, like, well,

what are we living for? And I said, well, don't you think there's other things to live for beyond just being happy? And they thought about it. And I was amongst some colleagues and they were really chewing on it. And it's like, well, what's above happiness? And how about joy and fulfillment? That's right. Like that's another level. Correct. Joy and fulfillment is in spite of my circumstances. Right. And so here it is. When I look at the work that you're doing and the impact and the influence that you're having and the people that are within your domain, God has gifted you. He's given you the ability to not only make wealth, but also the ability to lead and serve in a way that has transformative impact and influence on people. You're not motivating people. You're transforming people's lives, beginning with their hearts and their minds based on the work that you're doing. And so that's what I really get excited about

every time I get a chance to listen to a podcast. And I'm jealous and envious that you get a chance to spend time with Les Brown. Oh, well, we can make this happen. He lives in your area, so we can totally make this happen. Another thing, and I was writing this down, Carl Lester needs a podcast too, because things that you're saying to me, I know I needed to hear this today. And I know there are listeners on this line now that are like, oh, that's what I needed. That's what I needed. It is so powerful. It's so moving. And I said in the beginning, we're going to get motivated and moved because I know how you bring it in. You're like, we need more of you in our lives. And I mean, thank you. I really mean that. So, you know, I mean, you've hit on so much that that I kind of want to unpack.

But I also know we don't have a ton of time, but you've done something that a lot of professional athletes struggle with, right? Which is making the transition from professional athlete to successful. I don't even want to call it businessman, just a successful person outside of sport, right? What was that journey like for you? Because you did it, but I guarantee it wasn't easy day one, year one, right? Like you almost had to redefine or refine your because. That was hard. And I was listening to the podcast with Marcus Ogden, you know, and he talked about, you know, having been married and divorced. Well, you know, here it is when I was, my football career ended, I ended up going through a divorce. And it's not something that I've talked a lot about, but it really had a really big impact on me. And I felt like I had a scarlet letter on my forehead, you know, that big D on my forehead, because it's not something I ever envisioned for. My parents divorced when I was in college and I just know the impact that that had on me. And I just didn't want that to

be a part of my life. And so that transition, my NFL career ended in the fall of 2000 or training camp of 2000. The dot-com bubble burst. I'm going through a divorce. I'm having multiple knee surgeries. I'm needing to figure out, you know, what to do next, you know, career wise and figure out how I need to go about reinventing myself. And it was a it was a process and it took a lot of time and I got a lot of help. And I ultimately went back to North Carolina, went back to ECU and got my MBA. And that was an opportunity for me to press reset and get the love and support of family and friends because I felt like I had got beaten up, chewed up, spit out. But it led me down a path where I had just followed in my father's footsteps by playing in the NFL. Then I transitioned to following in my mother's footsteps by going into banking. And so, you know, it's a long story. It's probably another discussion or maybe I can talk about it on my own podcast.

But, you know, that transition, you know, it was hard. I got a lot of help. I needed to ask for help. But it's just been a journey. And, you know, I've been learning, you know, new things every step of the way. I've been learning, you know, new things every step of the way. I've been learning more about myself. I've been learning more about, you know, who and what I'm made of. And here it is. If I had to use one word to sum up my life, it would be overcomer because because nothing's been handed to me. I've had to earn it every every single bit of it. But here it is. And it's interesting, Chris Weber's got this new book that's coming out. And I was listening to an interview a couple of days ago when he was talking about his book. But the thing I'm most grateful for in life, Nick, is God's grace.

That's right. And because God's grace is his unmerited favor. And the life that I have, the family that I have today, the wife and the three kids, I don't deserve any of it. But God has been willing to be gracious and merciful for me. And he reminds me that he has a great purpose and plan for me that he wants me to carry out. It's just a matter of me responding to that call on a day-to-day basis. There you go. Well, I will tell you, you do deserve it because God doesn't give us anything that we don't deserve. So you definitely deserve it, brother, for sure. Thank

you. All right. So let's get the people out of here on this. What's two or three things that people can do right now to truly transform their life, whether they're former athletes trying to find that new thing, or maybe they're stuck in their business career and it's like, I don't know where to go or what to do next. What are two or three peaks of wisdom from Carl Esther Crumpler Jr. for the audience? Yeah, well, for me, my wisdom, my advice, my counsel, and I just recognize that in so many ways, we're all prideful people, but here it is, you know, being a man of faith, there's a scripture that says God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble. And I think to actually get God on your side and not be in opposition to you, everything begins with humility. So, you know,

every day, you know, I make declarations and prayers that center around submission and surrendering my will for God's will. And then, you know, allowing myself to be coachable and teachable. Like that's something that's critically important. So humility, being coachable and teachable. And then there's no substitute for doing the work. Right. There's no such thing as a handout that's going to empower you. And the reason why my purpose statement has more to do with empowering, it doesn't say enable, it says empower. And when you're empowered, you're able to take something

and carry it forward. But if you're wise, you see not only responsibility, but also the opportunity to bring others along in the process. Because at the end of the day, it's not about you. It's not about me. And I haven't made all the right decisions. I've made plenty of mistakes. I have made plenty of dumb, poor, stupid decisions. Let's just call it what it is. But for some reason, God has been willing to be gracious and merciful to me. And when I think about the grace that's been extended to me and what I have today, everything that I do in response to that understanding is just being done out of gratitude, that whole posture of gratitude. And then the last thing is, whatever you do,

do your work as if you're doing it for the Lord. And that in and of itself is about bringing an attitude and effort that exemplifies excellence. So I encourage my kids to do your best and finish. And I encourage my kids to be great today in your attitude and your effort. But here it is, while those are messages that I communicate and convey to my children, they're also messages that I communicate and convey to myself. To yourself. Because I need to be the model. I need to be the example. And one of the biggest things I abhor

is being called a hypocrite. Like that is something that I do not. Like that's offensive to me. It's for me to not be a representation of the things that I say or that I encourage other people to do. I love it. So many drops of wisdom on this episode.

You better start your own podcast. The world needs this. The world needs this. Or we're going to co-do a podcast together or something, but the world needs this, I promise you. I've been so touched personally by our conversation today that I'm leaving this episode a better man and a better human being because of your inspiration today.

That's awesome. And I inspiration today. That's awesome. And I mean that. That's awesome. Thank you. I appreciate you for coming on. And for everyone listening, remember your because is your superpower. Go Unleash It. Thanks for listening to Mick Unplugged. We hope this episode helps you take the next step toward the extraordinary and launches a revolution in your life. Don't forget to rate and review the podcast and be sure to check us out. Don't forget to rate and review the

podcast and be sure to check us out on YouTube at Mick Unplugged. Remember, stay empowered, stay inspired, and stay unplugged.