Mind Pump: Raw Fitness Truth - 113: Ride 'Em Cowgirl!

Episode Date: July 13, 2015

What do obscure sexual positions and the Periscope app have in common? To begin, they are both featured on this episode of MindPump. Listen as Sal, Adam & Justin dig into a number of off-the-wall topics for your listening pleasure...

If you want to pump your body and expand your mind, please only one place to go. Mite, op, mite, op with your hosts. Salda Stefano, Adam Schaefer, and Justin Andrews. Watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, watch, I was starting to fist bumping a little bit. I've pretty good at that, dude. It's in my blood. I can't help it. You know, worst case scenario, things that have mind pumping all of a sudden doesn't work out for you, dude. You could always do that like that. Like those silver guys in San Francisco on the side of the road.

Oh, right. Do all the weird noises and show you that, right? I think you have a side job, really. I like the ones that just like, they hang out there all day. They don't move at all. And then all of a sudden they just scare some fucking. Yeah, I make sounds like that on a good erection.

Like that's weird. And for whatever reason, it turns out my wife makes those lightsaber noises. It is wall. Shhh. Damn. Shhh. So listen. Listen. Shhh. Oh, hold on.

You sort of fight. What was that sound? I was. You were hitting someone. There's always a Darth Vader around the corner. So he likes him. He likes him, Darth. We're talking the Dic-Talk right now, already.

We didn't waste no time getting sexual already in Darth helmet. You guys remind me what happened this morning. So this morning, I worked early, right? So I was at OTF at 5 a.m. Oh, I got this little front desk girl. She's getting married at the OTF. Yeah, she's getting married in two months and she's 23-ish somewhere around there.

And she's a virgin. And well, there's two problems Young an a virgin and getting married so she One of our members. I'm sitting I'm waiting for class to start right so it's actually about 445 It's pretty early and wait a minute wait a minute. She's a member who works there. No listen. She works there. Okay, okay bad story listener So she I'm I'm sitting back there. I was just gonna ask you because, is it like,

bro, wait, wait, wait. So, she, yeah. Well, no, because you're back in the day, chicks would be like, I'm a virgin, but they've, you know, they've had oral sex, anal sex. They've had all kinds of, but they'll have vaginal intercourse. I'm a virgin.

Is it like one of those? It's like a legit virgin. Like, she's a business boyfriend. I'll tell you what, when I I see her I love that one. When I see her at work on Monday I'll ask how how legit of a virgin Yeah, yeah, you know what I mean? So we were talking we were talking about your vagina on mine pop Yeah, and Sal wanted to know are immediately already feel bad. Yeah, I know right I think I won't drop her name so after she gets really embarrassed So Sal wanted to know that if are you a real like a real yeah real or a part of that you have it taking in the

house. How authentic are you? Yeah, you take it in the ass that he doesn't count you as a virgin. Yeah, I don't have to you have a key that you have to open the chest that he belt and all that. I don't know if she is all that works. She seems she she strikes me as that she's like she's a virgin virgin like all the way. I think I think I don't know. I'll I'll ask him Monday. I'm impressive because it's it's like a unicorn. You know like I don't really do they exist at that age? No and you know what if she marries this guy and then it's just horrible like the sex is horrible. Well it's gonna hurt. Well she might not know here she's never done anything. You're a virgin. She has to masturbate at least she masturbates. So these are the questions you need to ask her out

I don't you have to mask right this down. Yeah, do you masturbate? Of course you have you had anal and oral sex right? Yeah, that way we can have a follow-up show. I'll ask you what the anal and oral because I think those are fair questions It's not you get a kind of work on it for a while before hand right? Yeah, the funny part well, you know We're interrupting Adam too much. Yes, all right He doesn't like it. We're so bad at that to him. It's okay. This is okay. It's only what I'm saying. It's only what I'm giving a good intellectual.

Exactly. If I'm saying something intelligent, I'm giving good advice. That's all the time. I don't know. We all forget what I was going to say. Exactly. Come on, do you know what I'm in the zone? Yeah. This, if you throw me off on this, it really doesn't matter. We're talking about somebody else's vagina that probably shouldn't even be talking about.

It's for girls. Yeah. So, so a while who was funny made up person. I'm sitting there, right? throw me off of this, it really doesn't matter. We're talking about somebody else's vagina that probably shouldn't even be talking about it. Poor girl. So a while, it was funny. She made up her son. I'm sitting there, right? I'm sitting next to her and a member walks in and she hands her this book and she looks at me really close and really quick and she scurries underneath the hides it underneath the desk really fast. And I'm like, look at that and I'm like, what the fuck is she doing right now? And she's looking at me with like this kind of guilty,

this guilty look on her face. And she's like, did you see that? And like, well, yeah, I just saw you hide the book. What is it? It's like, oh my God, I'm so embarrassed right now. I'm like, well, now I want to see it for sure. Let me see the book. So it's like this, I wish I remember the titles.

Oh! Shame on me for not taking a picture of it. It's called Ride That Cowboy. Ride It Like A Cowboy. Yeah, Ride It Like A Cowboy. Ride It Like A Cowboy or something like that by some doctor or something. And it's basically a karma sutra.

Dr. Homeslot. And it's just got all these great sketches and pictures. So I'm like scrolling through and like going through all the different positions. I know what you were thinking. This is Adam as he's going through the book of a thousand. What's going on here? You're gonna try.

A thousand positions. Done that. Done that. Done that. Ooh, this is a new one. Oh wait, no. No, I circled page 76 because there's a position on there that I only did once, but that's basically it.

I was going through like this though. I'm going through it. I'm going like, oh, that's what you fucking call that. Right. Yeah. That's what you call that. Don't you love going on the like the comm sutra or whatever and you're like, that's an impossible position. You get out of here. Yeah, I saw one where like they're both laying on their backs with their legs up in the air. So with the backs of their legs against each other. And somehow,

what? It's like what you gotta bend it back, right? Yeah, I'm like, how do you bend it downwards? Right. To do that. That sounds crazy. Yeah, I mean, if you're a real man, you're gonna blow the front of the chicken.

I mean, so you're gonna blow her freaking pelvis apart. But first, it's gotta be really like, you gotta, I mean, it's gonna be hard, but bendable. Come on. You want it hard. Yeah, so if it's hard, you're not gonna be able to like, you should be able to, you should be able,

that the rule of thumb is you should be able to support a large bath towel, a bath towel, and just hang it on, on it. You guys are, you guys are, I thought I was the only one that measured that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, we're laughing because we know. Because it's accurate.

We are gonna do that. Everyone's, why, everyone's, why come out of the show, like, oh, it's going to be a good day, honey, there's two towels today. Yeah. That's a home straw. Oh, yeah, baby, that's a beach towel. I guess you're wondering.

Oh, shit. Hey, honey, come here, baby. Come do some pull-ups on it. Yeah, there we go. So this thing, this book actually had these sketches, right? And it had a part where it had like four or five different dudes. And it was a sketch. It was a sketch and this girl had a ruler out to all these dicks.

And it was like, the listen, yeah, like the, just like the small penis, all together, small penis, or the short fat penis, or the short skinny penis, or the like average penis, and then the long skinny penis, the big fat penis, like it had all of them. And then underneath that, it had all of them and then underneath that,

it had what are the best positions for that type of dick? Get at it. I was super fast. The best position for the short skinny dick. I totally got all sex. I totally got all my hair. Yeah, yeah. That's it.

Dude, okay. Doug just pulled it up. He emailed that to me and I'll post pictures from him. Okay, Doug just pulled it up. They, and you know what, Dr. Sayd, Alistair, those are some plugs right here. It's called, Rhydem Cowgirl.

Rhydem Cowgirl by Dr. Sayd. Is this a guy? There is a girl. Well, there's a girl in the front cover. It's a guy that wrote it. The guy that wrote it. I don't, this Dr. Sayd, Alistair, sound like a... Sayd?

Sade. I don't know. It might be Sade. Yeah, that's a mystery. I don't know. It might be saday. Yeah, that's a mystery. I don't know. You need the perspective, well obviously a woman's perspective and that's probably best, right? I would think.

Yeah, totally because of a guy. And you know what? That's true because if a guy wrote it. Yeah. Yeah. But why is this book only two pages long? It's kind of one-sided. Big job, Doug.

Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, right there. Yeah, I saw it. You guys remember when we were kids before porn was easily accessible? You would go, like, you'd find books like this in a library and be like, they're great, they were just sketches. You'd show your friends, come here. Oh, dude, you brought some vagina.

We talked about the story. We talked about it a lot more, very good photos. I remember the, you tear out a machine. You took exactly a photocopy, a photocopy like a Playboy magazine and then you'd have it for months, that's the same thing. That's exactly what I had photocopy like a playboy magazine and then you'd have it for months. That's what I had. That's the exact same thing.

Exactly what I had. Or you had like a fort out in the forest where you're like, this is what we did. We had like a... Oh, shit. I mean, you were told you. Yeah, I did. Wait, wait, wait, this is great.

We had like the neighbor kids. We all in on this, right? You're right. All right, dude. You know, somebody's dad made some like tree house, you know, kind of thing. And we just would all stash our porn there. Oh, my jack. Check this one out.

Everybody would kind of contribute, you know, every now and then. So often would you sneak up their bicep and jerk off in the car? Probably once, twice, three, four, who knows how many? Yeah, multiple times. Yeah. You're a young kid and very virile. So things happen. Hey, are we even going? Are we right?

Yeah, we should talk about something that we've just actually just talked about. That's blowing up. I foresee this being the next big social media thing. Well, you just bought stock in it, you believe in it so much. Well, I bought stock in the company that owns it, Periscope. Yeah.

We just started Periscoping and this thing's freaking crazy. I mean, it's live streaming video. It literally, it removes the middleman. I could see celebrities doing this all day long. So you know what, it's so new. Yeah. I think that we should come up with some slang terms to have a reference like what you're doing on it

or something. So we could be the first ones to say, we came up with that. You know how people like to tweet or you gram, or whatever, you know, we're scoping. Yes, when we got to come up with a term that it's our term says we're starting to shit.

Scoping. Scoping. I feel like that's not original. I feel like someone's gonna say that should already have a tag of that. I'm sure it's right there. Yeah. Get your wheels, get your wheels turned up.

But I do, I am with the sal, but I will say this. I still like spulunking. It's spulunking. Isn't that like rock climbing or something? It's going in caves. Spilunking. So there's, you know what I mean? There's multiple applications.

Yeah. Random fact. I'm like just constantly spulunking. Do you know what they call running, stopping and walking and running, stopping and walking and running? Intervals. No, fart like. Fart like. Fart like.

F-A-R-T-L-A-L-E-K. Can you look it up, Doug? Just a double check. Make sure I'm not just made up some shit, friend. That's stupid. You fart like, bro. You probably just made it up. No, I hope I did it because that'd be weird.

Why would I make that up? That'd be so what it'd be. Have you ever guys ever played the gate? There's a Boulder Dash before, where you have to do that? Oh yeah. Oh yeah, you just bullshit, like some word. Oh great. I've been at Adam's a fucking champion. I know, world champion.

I guarantee it. See look, I found it. Boulder Dash. Fart Leck. Yes, a system of training for distance runners in which the terrain and pace are continually varied. Who the fuck came up with that? Bro, fart lech.

That sounds like a horrible sex act. Okay, like bro, bro, how was it with that chick last night? Fart lech. Okay, she's a freak. Oh yeah, what would happen? Well, he did a little fart leching. I don't know. At one time this week, okay,

this coming week up right here. So this is really, this one was nice. Oh, it's pretty sweet. So each of us have to incorporate that into an Instagram post somewhere. Far like yeah. See who gets more creative. Listen, we should make a far like guy. It's the thing called far like actually we should do that.

Maybe she should do that instead. We won't release what it is. We'll give it this is going to take over the new hit. Right. Yeah, the hit train. Yeah, if you're a fart lick train. If you're doing hit that was so 2000. Yeah. You know, what's new now is fart licking

Get mine mine pumps fart licking fart licking guy fart lick it's fart like fart lacking for lack come get your fart lacking guys Lacking you're not lacking in the fart like fracking fart like partly L.E.K. How do we get plural? This is such a weird word. What's the pet fart like? Heart like Get our part lacks guy. Why don't we just use that for the periscope? Hey, we're about to fart like in about three minutes Stop goes. It works. Yeah, we're all right. We'll just go far to go far to go Alright, we'll think about it.

Yeah. Actually, listeners, listeners, what should we, come up with some terms for us to use for like, for Paris go? Yeah. The more creative the better. Well, can I tell you about Paris go right now? And this is why I'm, I'm really intrigued by you going out and buying the stock and now.

Cause so we ate my buddies and I, every once in a while, we, uh, we'll chop it up about our opinions on companies and stock and stuff like that. And I, my buddy was ranting way back when, on Twitter, when Twitter was really blowing up at the beginning and Facebook was going on, and then Instagram had just started. And I was the one who was pushing back saying, like, I don't, I don't think so. I think, I believe that Facebook is like the fucking, the monster. Make your monster, yeah, for everything. For social media and stuff like that, they just own everybody to the point where they just if you're that good,

we'll just buy you out, right? And at that time, it was when Twitter got offered, I want to say it was 2.2 or 2.4 billion dollars. By Facebook, Snapchat, they tried to buy it too. And they held out. Yeah. Snapchat. So, yep, it's a snapchat. So I was, I was like, dude, that was a stupid play because you could have

cached out real quick and now what's gonna happen is you're gonna see Facebook just come out with something that's gonna totally fucking dominate them, right? And I said, plus you have Instagram where you can basically tweet on that, it's like tweeting anyways, all the same shit with hashtagging and talking and communicating amongst each other and sharing and everything, all the same. And then you also have videos and pictures, which makes it even cooler.

So I thought it was gonna just totally destroy them until this Periscope came out. Now that Periscope is out, now I'm like, ah, this is why Twitter was holding out. They had to know that this was in their future coming and what they were gonna do with it, which I think is, I mean, it's basically, it's live streaming like YouTube.

Yeah, it's YouTube. It's live streaming videos YouTube. Yeah, it's YouTube live streaming videos. Like people have been doing that on their computer like for a long time now. And now it's like, it's so easily accessible, like cause you know, it's mobile, like wherever you are, like, hey, look at me. Everybody that is following me on Twitter. Well, the biggest products,

the biggest tech products that come out and explode are disrupting products. They disrupt a market. Like, when people first started downloading music, right? It just completely disrupted this huge behemoth music industry, same thing with YouTube. Like all of a sudden, anybody can make a fucking video. And when YouTube first started,

the people who first got on it, they're all millionaires now. Did you guys just see that guy PewDiePie? You know what that is? So this is a guy who first got on it they're all millionaires now. Did you guys just see that guy PewDiePie? You know that is? Mm-hmm. So this is a guy who makes videos on YouTube. He's a he's a he's a total dork but brilliant He makes these stupid videos where he plays video games and narrates them. Oh I bet your son's a welcome. Oh, dude. Okay. I already know all about that. Do you know how much he all he does is make all he does is play video games Yeah, you watch the game Adam So the game is on the fucking screen on YouTube

You don't even see the guy and you just hear him in the background talking as he's playing. You know how much you made last year? How much? Just doing that seven million dollars Fuck you guys Seven million dollars. So the inner what's happened now? Right? So what's happened now is it's eliminated all these middlemen So with like periscope anybody now could be a live celebrity. And if you get on it now and take advantage now, it's gonna be huge because you're gonna see all them. I think you're gonna see all the celebrities

are gonna start, like they're using Twitter and Facebook, where they're gonna be able to be able to directly connect to their fans video live. You're gonna see advertisers do it. You're gonna see releases of new products on Periscope. Nobody's gonna release a product anywhere else, but Periscope because it's right then and there and you get an alert advertisers do it. You're gonna see releases of new products on Periscope. Nobody's gonna release a product anywhere else but Periscope because it's right then and there and you get an alert on your phone.

So everybody's gonna stop what they're doing. Oh shit, Nike just came out with a whatever or look at the athlete what he just did. Yes, yes. It's super personal. It's free to use. You get feedback with your people. It's gonna be fucking huge.

The thing with Twitter is, Twitter's having an issue figuring out how to monetize what they have, but Twitter's very similar to Facebook in the sense that they are the most informed businesses of their clients. Like no company knows as much about their clients as they do and it's voluntary. Like you put shit on Facebook, you like things, like they know everything about you.

Google is worth more, but Google, a lot of it is based on your searches. It's not your voluntary telling people what you like. So it's very powerful information. And I think Periscopes and Expo thing, and I think Twitter's gonna figure that out. That's how they get into the predictive marketing and all that kind of stuff.

Oh dude, you're gonna watch. You're gonna watch all these algorithms everybody's working on. Well think about it, it's like with Facebook. Like you walk into a restaurant. First of all, what do you trust more when you go to a restaurant? Yelp or your fence or your family.

Yeah, yeah. Friends and families. You're gonna walk in, you're gonna look up, oh my buddy on Facebook likes his place. Right? The reason why Yelp took off is because what that competed with was stupid, you know, like critics, which you don't know.

Yelp has seen more personal. It's updated right away. Yelp will be taken over by, I think, like critics, which you don't know. Yelp, it seemed more personal. It's updated right away. Yelp will be taken over by, I think, Facebook type of stuff. Yeah. So it's all gonna be connected. So I stopped, once you guys introduced me to Periscope, I was like, oh, shit.

I get it. This is gonna be, you know, shit. No, for sure. I was all over that stuff right away. So it's just, and there's, oh my god. By the way, but the worries are, and I was kind of describing this to you guys, you know, at some point, like before that,

well, we were kind of describing like the whole suicide thing long time, right? Like that could be an issue. Someone could post a life, somebody could be able to do anything. There could be abuse there as far as like, drawing in traffic, you know, I'm sure these, and I hate to say it, but those fucking ISIS guys,

you know, you're holding it and using it for all that shit. But again, it could be used against them also. This is true. And that's, I think that's what they probably don't consider. It's harder. It's harder now to be fake than ever before. Your shit gets revealed real quick now. Well, that's what I love.

Yeah, about like everything that's been happening with Twitter and Facebook. And like it really has, as far as programming goes for TV and radio and all this kind of sudden, why podcasts? Even before we got started and I started kind of converting over to podcasting, it's like, you go back now, you go back and you just see this whole formula. You see how everybody's got, okay, I got a break right now, and it's commercial. And then everybody has this sort of persona that is so fake.

Like actors, people are gonna wanna know if this actor is really a douchebag, right? Because then I'm like, well, yeah, he's maybe a great actor, but I'm less inclined to watch his movie now that I know. Or I'm more inclined to watch his movie because he's an awesome guy. Exactly. Tom Cruise, you know, Periscoping from his kitchen, you know what I mean? After he just woke up, looks like shit, making breakfast.

I mean, how connected could you possibly get to your celebrity? But I will say this, of all these social media things. Yes, follow him everywhere. One of the greatest predictors of whether or not it marked my words, social media platform will do well is the fitness industry. We are the first of all industries to adopt and maximize every single platform. YouTube, the very first videos on YouTube that we're trying to use it to promote market, fitness, Twitter, fitness, and then all the other celebrities start to come on. Periscope, who's adopting it first? Yeah, fitness. All fitness people, people showing their workouts and shit.

So it's only a matter of time. So funny that tech is so behind the idea that, like, yeah, they think about people eating, people getting entertained, you know, like they're trying to reach all these people on all these mediums and they forget about fitness. Like, they're only now just starting big. Oh yeah, people have to do health related things every day.

Oh shit, maybe we should try and get in this market. Apple, Google, Facebook, whatever. I bet you, I bet you it's hilarious. I bet you it's a matter of time if that's not happening now. They're already working. I think you're gonna see, I think you're gonna see, I think you're gonna see, I think you're gonna see

porn stars, periscoping. I think you're just starting to think you see I think you're see porn stars pair scoping I think you're just fixing live. Oh, that's already but that's how to be happening already They already do that on on Instagram that you guys haven't came across pages like this. Okay, so there's girls Yeah, you showed me a couple Yeah Please blow the horn when you're up your fucking dick these blow the horn when you rub your fucking dick. I'm just kidding. W-w-w-w-w.

I didn't do that. So there's, there's, there's chicks on there that, you know, they have huge follies, 60, 90, 100,000 followers, and they just use the Instagram because you can't do Instagram for long to get to drive the people back to like their, their live videos where they, you know, charge X amount to see them undress or do whatever, whatever they do for X amount of dollars. Well, now there's Paris go. There's no idea. There'll be no reason for them to have to switch over

and go to another platform. You'll be able to do it all straight from Paris go. Did I tell, did I talk about online how I got offered for the first time ever to flex on video? Did I talk about that? Yeah, you did. Fuck, the muscle worship. That's so weird.

Finally. Yeah, right. We've been working at it for a while. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm glad it's starting to pay out. So I just wanted to let you guys know I'm done with the show and make it on my money. So listen, all these hellies, hellies, hellies,

hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, hellies, I told some guy that if if times ever gets that tough, I'll hit him back up Do you know how much money we would make in gay porn? Oh, just throw it out there just throw it out there. It's really in dollars. Put it out there Yeah, did you did you guys watch my Paris cup the other day where I haven't watched any pairs I bought fucking chairs and ship it. You guys like me outside the show. I know Please so tell me tell me yeah No, why would you do? No, I follow you bro. So I always talking? Yeah, yeah. Please. So tell me, tell me. Yeah. No, why would you do? No, I follow you, bro.

So I always talking about one of the things not to try and do on Periscope. So I'm driving home on 85 South from Las Gatos to Southside where I live at five o'clock at night. So you can just imagine what that's like. For a perfect. Yeah, pretty much walk faster. So hey, this is a perfect time for me to Periscope. So I'm going to fucking put it up on the dashboard. I'll Periscope and talk to

everybody, right? And so, I'm driving and I'm like trying to set up my Periscope and I'm like reaching in my center console, trying to get this wire out to connect everything. And as I'm reaching through there, I have like, I have a bunch of this huge center console. It's all kinds of shit in there. And I have a bunch of change at the bottom. And I'm like trying to find this. And I'm like driving at the same time, right? And I'm trying to set phone up like multiple triple tasking here, right? So talk shit later about the whole drive thing I don't care.

So I'm reaching through the chain. You can end up periscoping and so I'm getting arrested. You know what I mean? I mean, I have a lot of publicity. We should do that. So I'm reaching through the chain and I have a fucking replacement blade for a box cutter and it slices my finger. Oh.

Wide open, bro. Wide open so bad, it's squirting out of my finger. I've never had that before. Oh no. It's squirting out and I fucking freak out. So the only thing I think of is sticking in my mouth right away, right? So I'm sticking in my mouth and then squirting all of it.

It's always the first thing you think. Yeah, right, you guys. Stick it in your mouth. So. It's always the first thing you think. Yeah, right, you guys, stick it in your mouth. So it's, I got white leather seats. Last thing I'm gonna do is squirt blood all over, right? And I have foreign objects. Stick it in my mouth. And I'm dressed in like, I'm like super nice clothes,

but I'm in nice clothes. I'm not in like work clothes. And so I got the finger in my mouth and I'm going like, fuck, I gotta get, I'm looking for a napkin somewhere and I got this like little paper towel square. And so I grab it, pull my finger out of my mouth and I wrap it around that. It takes maybe literally 30 seconds

to soak that entire thing red towards dripping, dripping blood off. I mean, this thing is starting to lose your finger. Dude, it's this little tiny, it looks like a little tiny cut. Bro, are you kidding me? Not a bunch of you squirt blood out of that. Cause it was so deep it went. Bro I couldn't fit.

I shut up bro. I couldn't fit a freaking electron through that hole. That's so small. Fuck off. Maybe you were bleeding on the quantum and the quantum. I wish I was there for this now. Hey if you look. If you watched the periscope I actually took a shot of the fucking paper towel.

Bloody was it. He's trying to prove it to us. Watch the periscope. fucking paper towel bloody was it. I was trying to prove it to him. Oh yeah. Watch my first go. Yeah, watch it, Dicks. Watch it, watch it, Dicks. So it's like, it blows this bad that after it soaks up the towel, the towel's dripping on me now. Now I'm like, fuck what do I do?

Stick it back in my mouth again. So it's back in my mouth. And I remember that I have my gym bag. And in my gym bag, I felt like ankle tape. And I'm like, okay, I'm fucking reached back there. And I'm like, just gonna cut the circulation. In an out rock tape. Yeah, right?

Exactly. Oh, we gotta use for it now. So I'm reaching back there. But dude, you know what it's like to tear that stuff? You need two hands to tear that shit. You know what I'm saying? I'm saying, oh, you wrapped somebody else so then you tear it.

So I'm like, wrapping around my finger and now I can't fucking tear it off and make a squirt. So I got like in my mouth, I can drive me with one knee and I'm like, trying to tear with my teeth. Wow, your periscope? Oh, yeah. No, I couldn't get the periscope going. Oh. I eventually just gave up on that.

I periscope when I got home and I told everybody on periscope, but hey, I tried to periscope you guys and got held up by this or like that. So, you know, note to self, don't try and try and periscope. So, yeah, we're trying to be masters of multitasking and we all forget that we're shitty at that. Yeah. You can only do one, maybe two things max. I know, that's the time. That's man, right?

You know, though, like, it just thinks our way through. Like, no, we can do it. Ah, I mean, yeah. Let me tell you how bad men are at fucking multitasking. We can't pee and sneeze at the same time. Oh, that hurts. Yeah, exactly.

We can't control the, we end up blowing things apart, so. It's that hurts. Yeah, exactly. We can't control this. We you end up blowing things apart. So it's crazy to me how, and I guess it's the generation now like the instant gratification and how fast they are onto the next thing. And it's like, dude, if Facebook wasn't enough, we've got Instagram, we've got Twitter, we've got Snapchat. And now we got fucking Periscope. And I'm like, I don't fucking have the time to do all those dude Yeah, so much god damn work to get all those. It's a matter of time before someone someone hooks up like a GoPro and just live 24 7 But I just I just I mean show that was always on tune in and watch my life now

That's what it's gonna be we're all like you know Connected in our brains and then it'll just travel to somebody else's perspective. Whoa, come on. You guys with me? That's why he doesn't smoke weed, bro. He doesn't even have to do that to him. No. I got to smoke to think like that, bro.

I told you, I think. You automatically go. You automatically go to the other dimension, automatically. Oh, yeah. I have to get lifted to go there. So Justin, what's up with this star war spin off they're talking about? Like a Han Solo? Han Solo, they're doing the back story for Han Solo and do like almost like a prequel

for his personal story and like growing up and all that. Really? Yeah, I'm super pumped. Damn, they're milking it. We'll do that. If you think about it, here's how I think about it. Like, how they like absorbed Marvel, right? They're gonna want to max their money.

It took them like how many billion dollars or whatever to acquire them. They're gonna do the same with Star Wars. So what they're gonna do is make each character, you know, have their own celebrity, just like you have your Captain America, your Iron Man, your brilliant. Yeah, so I mean, I can see what they're doing,

and maybe they haven't admitted that yet, but I know they're gonna do that. And so we were kind of speculating on the forum, I'm like, oh my god, somebody said something about a backstory for the Sith, and I literally just my pants, because I want that to happen. Yeah, so bad. I can attest my pants because I want that to happen.

Yeah, so bad. I can attest to that. I'm like, Darth Maul was the biggest waste of a character ever. And I want people to chime in on that one with me. Yeah. That's an important shit to talk about. No, I think that's really cool. I mean, I loved the Star Wars when they did that.

When they did that with Star Wars, they went and told the backstory of it. That's what made that, I mean, you could not even be a Star Wars fan and watch that movie and love it. You know, and not know any of the characters really. Yeah, they just immersed you in it. Yeah, that's such a great job for it. Yeah, no, they do stuff.

The first three, it's like, you know, like, I mean, you can. Yeah, I'm not interested. I want you as Darth Vader. Yeah. I want you, yeah, choking fools. Yeah. I want you, yeah. Choking fools. Yeah. I don't know. Are there any good movies when we were kids that haven't remade yet? That we're good.

Dude, they're working on everything. I know. It's like everything. That's it. You know what, though. I mean, you heard about little big trouble, little China. They're getting really good. Oh, no, you can't do that. Like, what the hell is this? How can you remake that?

That's one of my favorite movies. I watch it every time I'm either hung over or sick. One of my favorite movies of all time. Do you remember that movie? Of course I remember that movie. Big trouble. A little shine. I like the part where the dude, what's his name,

Egg Shen or whatever his name is. And he's doing the tour. Oh my god, the view of the town of the fucking bus starts crashing and shit. Yeah, like what a person. Was that pre-mortal combat? That's where they got the idea for right in. Yeah, because I was gonna say,

they were pretty mortal combat. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Damn, that's a good movie. I had it over here. I had a huge crush on, oh, yeah, before she was on Sex and the City. Yes, what's your name? I don't know her name on,

yeah, I don't know, I don't watch fucking fine now. Anyway, she was hot. I'm terrible at hot back then. Terrible with three names. For sure. Big crush on her. It's always funny how someone drops names. Jack!

What was his name? Jack. Something. Oh, oh, oh, you're listening to Jack. Uh, pork chop express. Jack's fucking name. Jack's name. That was, what do you think?

That was 89 or so? No. It was in 80s. I think it was 87 maybe still in the I think it might have been 87 88. Oh you say no He's like Like he's like 88 You were 12 months actually the release was in the summer. Yeah, you might have been 87 Big trouble little China predator is another movie that was I've been favorite of all times, but you can't redo. I mean, you know, I'm saying some movies you just can't

redo. It was so epic about that dude like every big ass action star you wanted to see on movies was in that movie. Or besides So it's still alone that I've probably seen that movie more than any other movie Priter. Yeah, I love that movie. What is the movie? Why are yours is probably Star Wars right what what what one movie? Have you watched more than any other movie? It's got for me It's got to be pretty me and my cousin used to watch that shit weekly. Yeah together. Well, I have flip between that and like matrix I watch the whole series of bunch actually my My roommate in college would have it on like in between double days and we'd pass out to like the Matrix all the time.

Oh, that's funny. I see, I liked when it got weird, you know. Because it was like so, like you really had to think about what the fuck they're talking about. Yeah. And people get angry, right? They're like, yeah. I just want him to do those weird,

like the Matrix. Yeah. No, the rest of them became fight porn. It was the first one was brilliant. Yeah, but like the concept with like the multiple Neo's and everything. Yeah, when he was out there. It was cool. Come on. You sure don't drop acid? It listened. Did you ever get into the TV show For Enj then? Yeah, I love that show. Have you gone all the way through?

Yeah, I've finished it. Oh, see, so I stopped watching by like season four. When they got into the other dimension. Oh, when it started getting so... And it was so hard to tell what universe it is. Yeah, I'm like, are we in three? Are we in two? What dimension are we in right now?

Well, just watch for me again. That's the one thing I worry with JJ Abrams. It's like he does that. Like, because I feel like he gets a little bit, I don't know if it, like bored or something, like it with lost is the same thing. Like he got so far expanded with all the characters. It's like, oh shit, I gotta wrap this up.

And then it like became this, what everybody thought the world was, is like, it was the obvious go-to, but like, you know, you left a lot of the characters, like, unresolved. Like, you didn't know what happened. Yeah. Oh, I know, I know I was pissed with that. I know a movie I've seen more than anyone pumping iron. I'm pretty sure you guys have seen that a million times. Yeah, that's probably up there with one of my, yeah, pumping iron. My number one though, for sure, actually is a few good men. If you

good men, I've watched, oh, it's one of those movies. It's one of the few movies that like, when I can't find a movie or like, or when I find myself doing a lot of stuff, like, standing at my collection, looking at everything, I'm like, fuck. When I only had 13 DVDs, I could always pick something. It's like, oh, I watched that last week, I watched that the week before, I'm saying, I'm on this one. Having a huge collection, it's the hardest thing in the world for me to do.

I'll stare at my movies for fucking 30 minutes, trying to figure out, what do I want to watch? So, like, my girl and I, we play these games where I'll stare at my movies for fucking 30 minutes trying to figure out what do I want to watch? So like my girl and I we play these games where I was grabbed like five DVDs and be like okay I can at least get five that I can arrow down to and then like I'll have her narrow down three and then I'll down And then I'll then I'll eliminate one and then I'll put it behind my back and then she picks and then we're watching that movie It's like this it's like this whole thing because I can otherwise we're watching fuked men You ever watch it you ever watch a movie that you watch when you're a kid that you had a crush on a chick on it And then as you got and when you get older you watched it you're like wow yeah rockets here Who you guys remember that yeah?

I was in love with that chick You know who's the hottest chick of all time was that was the girl on Ferris Bueller's day off oh But you know it was another movie, you guys haven't seen it. You ever ever watched the last time there was from a hot one? No, not that, of course not. Of course I've seen that. Now have you guys legend?

Love that movie. With the elves in everything like that. Yes. With the freaking devil guy with the massive horn. I was scared at death when I was a kid. Yeah, that was creepy. You got scared of the devil guy. Oh, I got scared when I was a kid watching.

That was when we were young, was like. He talked all crazy. Bro, he looked like. That top time cruise. Yeah, Tom Cruise was in that time But that devil got that creepy dance. He's doing with the girl There's a lot of women were totally into that guy the dad of the devil. Oh, yeah He was all you act members all buffed. I do remember that guy. That's an old boy You probably had hubs. You're going back. We just lost half of our audience Big old red devil Dicks stop doing that. We should have a rule, bro We can't go before 1990 because I think I have her audiences got it. No, they get to go watch them now Yeah, but you remember fast times at rich mont high right of course I like where she's getting out of the pool. Oh, yeah, and they think I get caught in the bathroom. I you know, I'm trying to think I never was

I was never like a celebrity crush guy I had the only one I could ever think of that I ever went on like a oh my god this celebrity I went on a Britney Spears kick for a while where I was like I thought she was the hottest thing ever You just wanted it one more time. But see, that's not even that, how old are you in 20s? No, she came out when we were in high school. Was she? Yeah, her very school.

She came out with the Catholic school girl thing. And that was like, all the dudes were like, and of course I'm like, I'm mid-cuberty, right? I'm somewhere between 15 and 18 years old. So that hit a spot. Yeah, it did. It hit a sweet spot for me for sure. Do you think she would be as good

And now I'm talking about back then now nowadays are both the both kind of beer But who do you back then who do you think would have been better and better her or Christina Aguilera? Christina Aguilera way better. No way of course. No way. Britney Christina Aguilera was You know, that's a I tell you what I don't know though. Britney Spears is the one who fucking shaves her head. I know crazy That's crazy. There's a different crazy crazy. No crazy. No way fucks good to just you Crazy normally fucks pretty good explain, but then again Christine Aguilar. You hit that one spot and it's Like ridiculous notes that break windows, but I want to I want to hear Adams. how does this work? Well crazy fucks good. Yeah crazy does fuck good, bro

That's just they crazy doesn't raise your kids as a t-shirt. Yeah, sure Crazy fucks well crazy crazy good crazy fucks good crazy fucks good. Yeah, yeah crazy fucks good That's it. Doug right? Crazy fucks good. Yeah crazy fucks good. I like that. Yeah, no, absolutely. If I had to go back and check off like, you know, my list of girls that I had been with, right, I would definitely have to put, you know, the crazy they were, the more likely they're in the top five, you know, as far as the picture. But I mean, unfortunately, that's not enough

to carry a relationship. I mean, you can, I mean, it's enough to get it going for a while and to justify the craziness, because you're like, well, it is a little weird. She burned my car, but. We should add a little warning, actually, to the guys listening who are gonna take your advice.

How many times has your car been stolen? Adam? Twice. From your fucking driveway. In keyed. In keyed? How many times have your car been keyed? Oh, see why you guys say keyed?

Yeah. Right, right. Yeah. How many times you're carbon key? Oh, see why you guys say, yeah. Rit, rit, rit. Yeah. Okay. Twice in one episode I'm getting busched up bro. Oh man. Come on.

That's some bullshit. He's a crazy whisperer. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I think I was that guy. I've always been the guy who has that sign on his back that says like, I'll help you.

You know, and it's like, I feel like I got all, I got all the girls with daddy issues and shit when I was growing up, you know, that like, we're, and you know, what a dummy I was, because I felt right into it, because I wanted to, and probably, you know, if you're a psychology person, which I am, I'm on that stuff, I'm a guy who didn't have his, my father passed when I was seven. So I wanted to be the, I was the father figure.

So here I like to play that role. So I get these girls that are, need to be. Well, now I feel bad. Now I feel bad. I feel bad That's why I did that I threw that in there. Thank you. We just got rolled up make you guys like an asshole now We're asses. It was just then you guys probably it's pretty nice growing with the father isn't it? It's pretty nice growing up All right, I'm gonna go home and cry.

You win. You win Adam. You were just helping them. I had definitely to do it the fact that I fucked you up. You just keep at it. Keep on keeping on. No, no, no, no. Crazy girls do.

Crazy girl, it's a thing. That's why it's rare. But when you find the one that is like the sweetheart and you can bring her home to mom and she has that crazy just in the bedroom. I mean, that's close, the closest thing you can get to a unicorn. There's typically, you know,

crazy in the bedroom relates to crazy all the time. So I mean, you know, I got a theory, based upon what you said, basically if you could find a chick with a split, like a legit split personality. You know what I'm saying? Like one personality is like super nice, good. She go home and she switches and all of a sudden

she's like crazy split personality and they're not aware of each other. Wow. Usually those ones have to wear costumes, so it's weird. That sounds like a good porn. You know what I mean? And it sounds, it's almost as good as that one you love. It sounds like, yes, great, great porn. Yeah, it sounds like a scary trap to me,

too. It sounds like, you know, it starts off well. We're I'd be begging the winches. The split personalities are timed just right when you think you wanted all the time. And then like, yeah, you don't want one to pop out with your parents. Yeah, exactly. No, no, no, no, exactly. Then she tries to mount you at the dinner table and shit in front of your box. This is what you want. Slap me, sell, slap me. Meanwhile, dad's like, little foot jobs in his table. Lucky son of a man.

Yeah, you get a little fist pump from your dad at any table. Yeah, yeah. That's my boy. That's my, so lobbyist of bone. What is he called? That's my life. I don't tell me that. That's my life.

I don't tell me that. That's my life. Salami's the bone. We still have, don't have nicknames for you. Adam, you're the wizard, but we got to think of something else. I thought it was Clyde, and Alicia. That's my, that's, yeah, but it doesn't mean anything. Oh, you want to mean something?

Like something wizard. I like wizard, just wizard by itself. I had to have a last name. I guess the wizard, yeah. Pooh, Pooh and wizard. Pinnany wizard. I have to say that was the first time anyone's called me I like that one. That was kind of cool

We could have different meetings. I want to get you a big wizard hat. I will wear it. Yeah, just a big just because you guys call me that I like it. I will fucking and a big row with a lot of big wizard sleeves I'll go to the gym I'll go to the gym in a wife theater in a wizard hat. No, no, no, no wife is mine Salami's the boomer's the wife better. Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, go, go, go, go, go, super lightning. Nene, Nene, Nene, Nene, Nene, Nene, Nene, Nene, Nene. Silver lightning, silver lightning. I just throw it in my EDM beats there.

You actually look really sharp right now. You get your haircut just like that. Yeah, I did. Yesterday? Yeah, yesterday. Where do you see a barber still? Do you have a nice Tyler Charles? The barber, man, he's my boy.

I know, he probably never listens to that. You're so manly. I keep trying Charles the barber man. He's my boy. I know he probably never listen You're so manly. I keep trying to get it. Just so manly. I get my hair cut it up hair style He fucking yeah, I love you. Yeah, I know. I have to go to a barber cuz what about you? I'm a man Where do you get your hair? So it's until I? You fucking dick Okay, let's let's make it a third time. Wow, that's a new record. It is a record, dude.

Oh my God, geez. No, no, do you go to a stylist? Apparently, Sal didn't feel bad enough. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I would have forgiven the sober you up my dad used to cut my hair Just kidding. I'm just kidding. That's so wrong. Not cool. My dad's rolling over in a stray right now Yeah, so I I actually used to get my haircut and literally till probably I was 25 maybe even older from You know, always buy like a cheap barber, you know, and it was I had a $9 haircut for a long time at this spot Oh, yeah, this little Asian spot that I had forever that used to cut my hair for nine bucks and I don't remember What I was doing or what I had to do. Oh, you know what it was. That's pretty funny. We're talking about crazy chicks

I was banging this crazy chick and she was a hairstylist and she's like, you gotta come in and get your haircut. And I'm like, oh, I'm cool. I get a lot of stuff. I'm most a story star. Right. I think a larger percentage of crazy chicks are haircuts. I'm not sure.

My haircuts, that's a certain bang. There's a hair stylist. There's a lot of crazy seven and a nine are. It's a fact. Okay. Yeah, I have a whole sheet That's weird how they went and a nine and not a 10. Yeah, no, it's weird. It's a weird You can only get so many to show up to the line up. There's a point something something of them that is crazy There is actually something about that. I don't know exactly what it's seven and a nine hairstyle list are crazy

Yeah, yeah, because the 10th one never graduated. Maybe that's Beauty school dropout. Beauty school dropout. It's such a sad story. So she, she, she, she convinces me to come down and, you know, let her go at my head here. And I'm like, you know, I'm not, I don't know about this. You're thinking sharp scissors, your hands.

I'm here now. Yeah, yeah, right. I'm like, you know, I'm cool. I've got a $9 haircut. I'm like, who knows? You know, by this time, I think I'm like, you said I'm like 25ish or so. So I'm getting a little smarter about like, you know, even though I'm still hanging out with this chick that I know she's crazy. So I'm like, it's only, it's only going to last probably a couple more months and then

I'll be at the pay for this haircut, you know, that's not what I'm trying to do. You know what I'm saying? So I'm trying to do. I'm not trying to do that, you know what I'm saying? So I'm trying to dodge the situation, but nevertheless, she convinces me to come in and get a cut, and she does a great job. And I'm kinda like, whoa, this is a new look for me. I feel good. I got several compliments when I was walking around

so I'm like, well, I've never really been complimented on my hair, you know, like, this is neat. So, at that point, that's a word we need to use more often. We need to need, right that down. I use needo. We're gonna bring it back. We're gonna bring neat back.

It's a good word. Listen, that's neat. It's a good word. It's a good word. It was a good word in that place, I think, right? So, for a lack of a better word, we're gonna say neat. No, I'm serious.

I'm gonna use neat from now on. Okay. Okay. I wasn't sure if you're rolling me on the bus. No, no, no, no, we're going to say neat. I'm serious. I'm going to use neat from now on. Okay. Okay. Okay. I wasn't sure if you're rolling me on the bus. No, no, no, no, I'm done, bro, with that. Okay. I feel horrible. I'm going to help. Yeah, you are. So, uh, yeah, no, she can't see you come there. I get I get the hair cut done by her. And then it's, it's excellent. And, you know,

at that from that point on, uh, I started getting my, uh, my hair done through a stylist and, you know, at that from that point on, I started getting my hair done through a stylist. And, you know, and what I started doing too, which was always cool, which is definitely helped me now that I'm in my thirties, is I'll look at my hair stylist and I would be like, you know, hey, what's new, what's hip, you know, what do you think would fit my head right?

You know, and that's just it. If they're good stylists, it's like a good personal trainer. And if you come to a good, you're gonna say shit. Exactly, you come to a good personal trainer and just tell them a little bit about yourself or tell them what you're thinking or what you want and then let them do their job. A good one was going to take good care of you. A good hairstylist, you come in and be like, and what I would say a few things, like, hey, this is, I want this. I don't want that, but do your thing, you know? And then I let them go to work, you know, and kind of style it up and, you know, and then I, I always end up liking it. So

and kind of style it up and, you know, and I always end up liking it. So, that's, and then of course, now that I'm fucking going bald, it's almost, it's imperative that I have air style. I'm telling you bro, I like your hair looks good when you don't straighten it. Well, it's, say, when I, or when it whatever, when you put your head on,

it makes it straight because now you've got the curlyness going on. Yeah, it's naturally curly. And then for the show, I straighten it and why have the hairstyles do this straight And then comb it back. That looked good for the show, but I mean now like senior hair like this. It looks good like that. Well, this is kind of a new style Essentially, I'm just kidding. I'm learning this right now. So yeah, I like it. Yeah, it's I don't know. We'll see. We'll see. I'll rock it a few more times With the hat. It's hard. I feel naked without my hat though. Mm-hmm. You know, my hat's I feel naked when I don't have have pants on Yeah, you know I make it right now. That's good point. You don't have pants on it. I'm not being videoed. I am naked right now So

No, I Yeah, I feel a little weird without the hat, but you know I'll rock it. I'm rocking it right now No cap on right now, so I know Paris gope guys later on you can see my my Jerry curls That's somebody thought I permed. They're really curly. Yeah, I've really, I've, and it was worse when I actually had more. You know what, you just kind of start pair a scope and like, you know, primping and getting ready

the Adam way. I actually don't. I'm, I'm, there's a long video here. We go, everybody. My, there's my toes. My, my, my words. You get to hear the, the sound effects he makes whenever he moves. Dude, you can't leave me. That's the wax that I use. Great. Cool little thing that you just brought up right now. My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my she was just kind of pretty standard with her nails. I'm like, honey, you know what,

we're getting older now. Like you got to stay up on like, what's hip on the nails and this damn you clown on her twice. Yeah. Honey, you're getting older. Boom. Yeah. Your nails look like shit. Boom. No, no, I did not say that. We are getting older. I included yourself to take a lesson. We are getting older. Impact. And we, honey, we look like we've been gaining weight. So we should probably need to join you. But you're at 7% body fat. Yeah, but that's a lot. We're just fatter.

We need if you combine this together, our body fat would be high. Oh my God, I have to tell you this. It's just that. I have to tell you this. So last night, I'm sitting on the back, a train of comes out of the shower and she goes, honey, I feel so bloated and this and that. She's like going on and she's all we are having a period.

So she. She. I did not say that, but that would have been epic if I wouldn't have said that. So she's she's all she's all all, she's all, she's like, I feel bloated, I feel this way. And, you know, I know that I'm on my period right now, but I still, I've been, I've been dieting hard this and that and she's telling me like all this stuff, right?

And, you know, I think like when most girls do this, you know, they're searching for their, their partner to be like, no, baby, you look good, you look this out. Right. Out of super honest. No, I am definitely not that guy. So, you know, two years put in coaching, articulate, telling a lot of water and your ankles, your ankles.

So here's what happens. So she's saying that she's fat and you're and we have we have her, we're wetting this weekend that we're going to. So she was, you know, trying on new dresses and she, you know, we were shopping her last week together and I was there. And she's like, you know, I really want this sexy dress and I was helping her pick stuff out. She's like, I want to fit it in this neck as I feel good blah blah So that was last week and now this week period comes along now we feel bloated and we feel all this way right so She's trying dresses on yesterday. She gets all pissed off. She walks out of the store because nothing looks the way she wants to look And she doesn't feel good right now and she's expressing her feelings and I know the right thing to do as a man is I'm supposed to just You know be understanding and tell her how good she looks in this and that but the right thing to do is a man is I'm supposed to just, you know, be understanding and tell her how good she looks

in this and that, but the trainer in me says, well, let me see your fat secret out. Let me go over what you're eating. No, I just don't break it in. Oh, yes, so she goes, man, she goes, well, I haven't really filled it out. I say, well, then how the fuck am I supposed to tell you if you're holding water or if it's your eating too many

carbohydrates right now or your calorie intake is too high, what about your Fitbit? What are your steps at? Tell me how many calories you've permed. Yeah. So I'm doing this and solve the problem. Exactly. I'm trying to help her out. I'm trying to help her out. Like literally if she really fills that way, let me see if I can help her out. So I'm going to overage and she just kind of, she's listening to me like talk and explain like details, right? And

she's like smirking and she just, and it's like that smirk like fuck you, you know, right? And I go, what's that smirk for? And she's like, nothing, I love you. And I'm like, oh, don't do that. Don't do that. Don't do that. Oh, I love you, smirk. And you're really thinking of this motherfucker.

Like I could see it, you know, saying, she's like, no, no, no. But she went, it was great. This is why I do love my girl and her self-awareness is inside, and this is what separates her from all women. The most women would have picked up on me being a dumb shit and not picking up on what I was supposed to say and be like, oh honey, you look really good

and just being me, because that's me, to help her, and tell her that it's my profession. I take it very seriously, and I can probably tell you if it's water or what it is, and hey, you know, and get you through it. And so she goes, you know, it's funny because I do the same thing to you. When you tell me like, I'm like, I tell her like something's bothering me. My elbows bothering me right now because of this or that and be the massage therapist and her's like, well, we need to get on the table

and let me work this and let me open this up and let me do this. And I'm like, I don't have fucking time. I get all frustrated with her. It's the same thing. Right, it's the same thing as I heard being like, oh, poor thing, or let me get something for you. It's like she's like telling me what I need to do to fix it. And I'm like, I already fucking knew what I need to do

to fix it. I don't need to just tell me, say poor thing or what other, and she says that, you know, she know that's what was making her laugh. And she's like, I was thinking about how I do that to you. And so I can't really be mad at you for doing that. I'm like, fuck, she's bad. Thank you for listening to Mind Pump.

For more information about this show, and to get valuable free resources from Sal, Adam, and Justin, visit us at www.mindpumpradio.com. Until next time, this is Mind Pump. This is MindPump.