Money For Couples with Ramit Sethi - 93. Where Are They Now? Netflix Reunion with Amani and Matt

Episode Date: April 27, 2023

In this special limited series, we’re following up with couples from my Netflix show, How To Get Rich. Tune in to hear what’s new, what isn’t, and where their money conversations have gone since... our taping. Today, we check in with Amani and Matt, from their new dream home in San Diego. This episode is brought to you by: Nomorobo | To protect yourself and your family from phone scams, go to nomorobo.com/ramit for a 14-day free trial. Long Angle | If you've made a lot of money and you're looking for a community of peers to turn to for advice, go to longangle.com to learn more. DeleteMe | If you want to get your personal information removed from the web, go to joindeleteme.com/ramit for 20% off. Connect with Ramit • Get Money Coaching with Ramit  • Download the Conscious Spending Plan • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here. Produced by Crate Media.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 If you or your partner has fallen for a scam, I want to help, especially if you've recently fallen for an email or text scam, or you've gotten bad financial advice from someone who did not keep their promises, or maybe you just have not even told your partner because you are embarrassed. If this is you, I want to talk. Apply for free coaching with me by being on my podcast. Apply today at IWT.com slash apply. That's IWT.com slash apply. Let me share some of the coolest ways that my community has recently used money to live a rich life. One member did a month-long honeymoon in Europe after deciding she didn't want a big wedding. Another member bought a VW SUV that was their dream car that they've wanted for years.
Starting point is 00:00:48 And another member made a rule that any time she buys a ticket for an event, she always buys a second so that she can bring a friend. These are just a few examples of how my money coaching members have built systems to use their money. Notice that there's no more anxiety, that they have a smooth running system. They know when their debt's going to be paid off. They can feel comfortable spending on the things they love. They can actually spend less time on their finances while living an amazing life. In my money coaching program, members also get access to live events every month, including topics like money with aging parents and how to create a lot.
Starting point is 00:01:26 amazing vacations. That was one of my favorites where I shared how I spend my money on travel, plus Q&A directly from me. If you want to start building your rich life today, join us and get instant access to our back catalog of years of live calls. Check out IWT.com slash money coaching to join now. That's IWT.com slash money coaching to join the program right now. Do you have separate accounts? We have separate. Yes. Okay. Did you ever have a joint account for the best?
Starting point is 00:01:59 Mm-hmm. When I supported us, we had a joint account. I'm going to check out this conversation, because I've heard this like 10,000 times already just today. That's the end of the conversation. I'm just tired. It's like emotionally draining. You fight about money, you spin about money, and then what ends up happening? I get defensive.
Starting point is 00:02:17 And then? I get mad. Let me just talk to her. Trust me, you're not doing yourself any favors by cutting it. Trust me. I just don't understand why I shouldn't understand what I mean. And I don't understand why you're like, oh, you know, when I worked, I felt this and this and this, well then go work.
Starting point is 00:02:33 And if it's such a big deal for you, like, I. Today I have a special episode for you with two guests. You may recognize they are guests on my new Netflix show called How to Get Rich. That's right. If you go to Netflix right now and you search for my name, Ramit Sethi, or How to Get Rich, you are going to see my new Netflix show. and I decided it would be fun to bring them on, almost a year later,
Starting point is 00:03:01 to talk about where they are, what has changed, and you're going to see how honest they get today. So first, make sure you've watched them because you're going to have spoilers. So go to Netflix first. If you haven't already watched it, search for my name or how to get rich, add to list.
Starting point is 00:03:20 Make sure Netflix knows that you want to see this. Then, if you've watched the show, come back and listen because here now are Matt and Emanie to share what's been going on since we last talked on the show. Hey, Emanie. Hey, how are you? This is like such a like deja vu, but also like kind of PTSD, but like no offense to you. I hope it's not PTSD, but it is surreal to see you through the screen right now. Oh my gosh. Yeah. It's just so great to see you actually. Same. Same. I've been so eager to talk to you and catch up. Is this a loud?
Starting point is 00:04:04 So many times. I'm like, how old would we say right now? So will Matt be joining us? Yeah. You should. He's not like, I'm hoping he saw the Zoom link.
Starting point is 00:04:18 Okay. Let's give it a minute. I want him to definitely be on. I definitely want to catch up with him. Yeah. He was like, yesterday, I was like,
Starting point is 00:04:26 hey, you know, it's tomorrow. I don't want this to be one-sided where I fill out everything like what happened before, you know? Or so he was like, no, I'm good, I had enough of this. I'm like, no, you're gonna, I want your side of story too.
Starting point is 00:04:40 And how did he react to that? Um, oh, there we go. Hey, Matt. Hello. How's it going? Yeah, it's going. Okay.
Starting point is 00:04:54 Let's get a mani back and I'm excited to catch up. It's nice to see you. It's been a while. First off, the last time I saw you was, I remember vividly because it was that beautiful sunset. And we had spent a lot of time together. So it feels very surreal to see you after this much time.
Starting point is 00:05:13 I wanted to tell you the reason that I was really excited to work with you when I first met. I thought it was so cool how honest you were with me. There was this fascinating dynamic. Amani, you were earning tons of money. Matt, you had no financial access. You don't see that that often, and you were willing to talk about it. You know, very few couples will openly argue in front of me, and what I love about it is it's real. When y'all first came, we were pretty much at each other's throats.
Starting point is 00:05:45 I wouldn't say I was at her throat too much as she was at mine. She can get pretty feisty. But, I mean, yeah, you know, like, it was hard not to argue on camera. I never thought that we'd be in a situation still bickering after, you know, like, people were in front of us. I mean, I definitely understood, like, where my wife was coming from. You know, I mean, she goes through a lot of stress and I don't know. I guess the way that the cards fell, you know, she felt some type of way. And I don't disagree with her necessarily, but, you know, I'm just glad that at the end, you know, we were able to communicate and talk things through.
Starting point is 00:06:23 I mean, we were stressed. We were stressed. We were stressed. We were already fighting so much together before the show came. The show was kind of like what? We everything below the last. Everything to the surface. Oh, I mean, it's crazy, right?
Starting point is 00:06:37 People say that you'll forget that the cameras are there. They say that. And I never believed them. But it's true. You become in your own world, and it just shows what's actually happening. So, you know, I appreciated that you were honest. You were fighting. It was very obvious, like from the first five minutes in the room.
Starting point is 00:07:01 And then you showed that to me, which actually the trust that you put in me by showing me that allowed me to better understand what was really going on. And I'm very thankful that you both allowed me to see that. Even though it was tough to do it at the time. Gosh, it seems like sometimes the most important. important conversations we need to have are the ones that we are least likely to want to. Yeah, for sure. But you did it. You did it.
Starting point is 00:07:30 You really opened up with a lot. And it's quite amazing to see the results of that. When I first met Matt and Amani, they started fighting within minutes. They almost dropped out of the show. And every time I talk to them, they seemed to actually relish fighting with each other. It's kind of like one of those old couples we know who are always sniping at each other. But Matt and many are young. And I have to say, I'm very glad that they did not drop out.
Starting point is 00:07:58 They stuck with it. They have a lot of differences in the way they communicate about money and the way they see money. You can learn more about those on the Netflix show. Just guess the average wait time to see a doctor in the United States. I'm not talking about a specialist, just a regular standard family doctor. Do you think it's a week, two weeks? Nope. It's over 30 days.
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Starting point is 00:10:57 Is that you in a different place? It is. Pretty crazy. Because when we were talking to you, it was like a five-year plan for us to try to get to our dream house in San Diego. And it was just a combination of things. I had my highest revenue year was last year. Wow.
Starting point is 00:11:17 Amazing. This house was just like amazing. It was on a hail and a mountain. And you can see like like literally like 360 degree of San Diego and like even far you can see the ocean and the water. So, um, and he had a guest house. So I ran by him and I was like, let's go check it out. And he was like, you're crazy.
Starting point is 00:11:39 Did you see the price? And we went and like the moment like we were driving to like it was just like we had a goose house. We're like this is like our dream like and all the needs. We were like, we can't. forward this, you know? And yeah, fast forward. We actually purchased the house. It was pretty crazy. I had to put a lot of money down because I already had another loan. So I'm trying to sell my house that we filmed in to Mecca right now. And we started Airbnb our guest house. So that's like
Starting point is 00:12:12 another income that we started getting. And that's why we made that step. To be honest, it's probably like the riskiest financial decision we made. Only two homes trying to sell the first one, using all the cash obviously and the investments that I worked on all last year. But the Airbnb is doing well. So far as that paying half of the mortgage where it puts us back to our initial mortgage of the house back into Nacula. And that was the goal. Like we took the rescue decision knowing like we can get there where we might end up being in the same amount as like, you know, our previous house. But now we are in San Diego.
Starting point is 00:12:49 And yeah, it's our, what, second month right now. the house, Matt? Would you say so? Yeah. Yeah, it is. Wow. So this is amazing because I remember A mani that one of your dreams was to live by the beach. And Matt, I remember you telling me that you wanted to be more outdoors. Combination of both, Mountain House with some sort of water view. So that's kind of amazing. And you did it in about a year. Two things I want to point out. Number one, it's possible to live your rich life a lot faster than you think. I don't like hearing someone say, someday I want to take a trip to Spain. I'm like, what?
Starting point is 00:13:28 Let's get specific. How long do you want to go for? What season? What do you want to do there? What are you going to eat? That is important, and you can achieve that much faster than you think if you put a plan down and become intentional. The other question I ask him is, how much you think it's going to cost?
Starting point is 00:13:43 You know, most of us have never actually calculated what our dreams would cost us. A lot of times it's less than you think. Sometimes it's more than you think, which is also fine because it gives you a reason to make financial changes. Number two, I also want to make sure that they can afford it. Wanting a new house or extravagant trips or clothes or whatever is one thing, but you've got to make sure you can actually afford it. Now listen to Amini talk about it.
Starting point is 00:14:09 I had to take a risk. Like I said, it was the rescue. This is not ever take because I almost, you know, basically emptied that cash, but it's not gone because now it's in the house, equity, you know. When I was doing your spreadsheet, I love, by the way, the new version. So that first table when I was putting our asset, like the value of our houses and the car and all that, I was like, what? I didn't have. 500K?
Starting point is 00:14:39 And I was like, I was like, you don't guess our net worth. Like, that felt great. And again, it was like, you know, validation. That's not about how much money in the bank that you have. If you go and put that money towards something else, it's there still, you know. So, yeah, it's my first risky decision. So we'll see, I mean, right now I would say as much as like we have learned a lot and we're taking a lot of new experiences.
Starting point is 00:15:08 It is our actually, I would say, our most burnable financial situation right now because I own two houses not by choice. You know, it's a market that that's why I was too scared of investing. like real estate stocks all that like to me it's like gambling you know it's like up and down kind of market and when you take the risk you know that comes with consequences so our house has been in the market like since january we haven't got like any offers and that's like stressing me out because i don't have that much left in my bank account i have to think okay how many months can i go by paying two mortgages and then i have to and what's the answer how long can you go um i right now
Starting point is 00:15:47 have budget for like three more months and then after that i i'll bleed out like i don't want to to start taking out, like what you say. If you start cashing your stocks and you for like, no. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. We got to fix this right now. Hold on. This is crazy. So it's interesting what you say. On one hand, you feel the most successful and in control you've ever felt. On the other hand, you feel the most vulnerable. Absolutely. Okay. It was very risky. Like, just even me talking about it with my friends, like their answer was, did you really have to get this house. You know, you could have waited until you sold your to make a home and you would have found another beautiful home. But like for me was, it was hard for me to find in the market a house
Starting point is 00:16:27 with a guest house. So I felt like I had to make the move and take that risk decision of having two mortgages. But now here I am. I got greedy for my consent to this. My new mortgage is going to hit and I'm like, this is the worst case scenario I was I was scared of. That's why I'm like, Because I can already tell in like one minute how worse you can get, which is like, oh my gosh, I don't make enough money to support all this. I'm going to start cashing in my stocks. Then what? I'm going to go cash in my last.
Starting point is 00:16:56 Then what? Okay, this is an interesting scenario. They have three months of cash left, which is way, way too risky for me. But they also have a very high income and now multiple income streams. I kind of love these unusual financial situations. Let me give you my take. I think this is really risky and they need to get rid of their old house right away. The fact is they're going to sell it for a lot less than they thought.
Starting point is 00:17:21 That's life. Second, their scenario isn't really that bad if they act fast. And this is uncomfortable to hear for a lot of people. But the truth is that a high income solves a lot of financial problems. Not all of them because you and I have heard many guests who have high incomes and spend every last cent they make, but having a high income solves a lot of financial problems. My dream for Matt Nomanie would be that they sell the house fast, even taking a loss.
Starting point is 00:17:50 They set up a rule so they never get this close to running out of money again. And then they begin having more open conversations together where both of them have full access to the money and they share responsibility. That's what I would do. That's my dream for them. That was like a big part of the show that was like, um, I didn't, get an answer for intellectually now, which is Matt wanted, like I wanted to push Matt to do a type of job that I do, which is corporate and things like that and climb being louder. And he wanted to like run his own business. And I was like, oh, I don't want to fund that business for you. And it's too risky.
Starting point is 00:18:28 And, you know, you don't want to learn for somebody. You want to be your own boss. But I think the problem was he didn't find that thing that was making, you know, that could be his passion. And I've seen him thrive so much managing the Airbnb and you know like people love him he's great with people on customer service he really goes above and beyond like little things like you know cookies for the guest things like that and um he would go down and clean it like you know like no other like he was really like working hard on this Airbnb like his own baby and I see now what he was asking for before like running his own business like I just had a different concept of it and I think he's thriving he's good at it and I want to be able to support her more toward that direction.
Starting point is 00:19:14 Wow. But yeah, I feel like we kind of found something that I'm comfortable with, and he's thriving in for sure. It seemed before when we talked at least early on that there was this kind of like push and pull. Amani, you were saying like, I want you to do it this. I want you to do it my way. And now, like that's just me.
Starting point is 00:19:35 Yeah. Yeah, do it on my timetable, my way. Matt was like, no, I'm not going to do that. Yeah. Yeah. Fair to say, Matt? What do you think? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:45 Okay. And so now you change the structure. That seems to have really changed a lot of the dynamic. That's outstanding. Managing the Airbnb has been, I don't know, it's kind of delightful. I kind of enjoy it. What do you like about it? My wife respects it, you know, like, she'll actually leave me be and let me do the things
Starting point is 00:20:07 that I need to do for it because she sees, her focus is on, you know, like the end result. That's awesome. Just open the Airbnb and we booked all month except two days and it's like 3,600 revenue. Unlike a small loss, it just has like a really pretty view.
Starting point is 00:20:26 And everyone says in the reviews that the host goes above and beyond, you know, the place is so clean and he's so thoughtful. Like I can see his personality. like being put in the job as being a host. And I said it before. Like I didn't feel like I could trust him to like, you know, like to have a big investment in like some sort of business he does.
Starting point is 00:20:49 But something like this, I could see already, you know, the result. I don't think I could have juggled my job in doing this. I tried to do it all. But this is one of the things where I had to trust him to do it because I just, I just couldn't fit everything in my schedule. And I want to, I want to help him so I have more. That's my next goal financially. I'm trying to save and invest more so we can have another Airbnb property.
Starting point is 00:21:12 Amani hasn't trusted Matt for a long time. It sounds like she's made progress, but as I dig in, I can tell that it's still a very real issue. One of the most shocking things I've learned from this podcast is that almost all of the couples who come on my show with 10 out of 10 money problems have never read a single book about personal finance. Not just my book, they never read any book about money. You'll note that when people talk about money, it is very easy to dream about what they want. And actually, I like dreaming. It's good. We should dream. We should come up with our rich life vision. But we don't just need dreams. We need a plan. So you can create that plan yourself and figure out how compounding works
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Starting point is 00:23:12 Here's some of the most creative I will teach you to be rich businesses that my students have created. Nate turned his love of chess into a chess coaching and training business and started a legal strategy business for online entrepreneurs and creatives. Scott teaches yoga all over the world, including in the south of France. Now, what I love about all these, they're so, different, but they started from the same question. What if I took the thing I love and turned it into a business? One of the things that entrepreneurs learn is how to keep it simple. That is why, when I'm working with new IWT students who are just first-time entrepreneurs, I recommend that they get started with Shopify. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the
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Starting point is 00:24:34 Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at Shopify.com slash remit. Go to Shopify.com slash remit. That's Shopify.com slash remit. So since that time, you know, if you recall, we pulled out all those bills and we were looking through all that. I still remember on the table, we're looking through all this stuff and all that paperwork. What habits have stuck since we first met and worked together? I'm far from like being, you know, perfect with managing my money, but I would say that I mean now is all thinks more like long term versus in the moment.
Starting point is 00:25:16 In the past, I was always thinking like, I just want to live my life, you know, you only live once. Like I was focused on like spending that money to create joy versus now. Now it's more like kind of in the middle, you know, where, yeah, there is that 20, 30% that that we discuss where you can go spend, do whatever you want. But also, I'm thinking about, like, our future as a family, my kids, things like that on, like, I'm working hard on providing them a nice life, but I want to make sure it's, like, sustainable long term. So I'm always thinking about, like, what can I do to invest my money better?
Starting point is 00:25:54 What are other people doing to get additional incomes, things like that's what I'm more like hustler mentality, which I know. never thought I would be because I'm afraid of taking risk, you know? You know, like there are questions that you always ask, like, well, what do you think Matt feels about this? Because, you know, being empathic, I feel like that's something Matt is really good at. So I always try to think, like, even when I'm on my own, you know, how would he feel about this?
Starting point is 00:26:20 As a big example, when he was talking right now in the call, how, you know, he's like, there for me, like, as a listener, when I'm going through some stress, like, maybe. It made me think, okay, well, if he's my rock, then who's his rock? You know, so I try to do more of that for him, even though, like, it's hard for me to even, like, have it together for myself, you know, because if he has nobody, then you can't be my rock. It's kind of like a vicious circle, right? So I'm not, I'm not perfect. I'm better at it. I'm definitely not where I want to be, but, you know, I'm working on it.
Starting point is 00:26:51 Okay. I like it. All right. And Matt, what about you? What habits have stuck with you since we met? What was it, Quicksand? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You remember that?
Starting point is 00:27:05 That's right. Because, like, I don't know. I guess when y'all first came, I felt like I was at the point where, you know, like walking away just wasn't, you know, wasn't what I was supposed to do anymore. I guess I just forgot it. But, yeah, you know, like sometimes, sometimes just, you know, bringing it your attention, you know, like, hey, you know, like, you're being a little rough on me. And let's calm down. Let's go do something else. You know, like at least, at least it's good communication.
Starting point is 00:27:34 Yeah, that's cool. I'm glad to hear that word, quicksand. It's been a while. I'm really glad. You know what? You need tools sometimes to be able to say, hey, I'm overwhelmed right now, or I need a second, or I know we want to talk about this,
Starting point is 00:27:47 but I'm not in the place to do it. Right, right. And whether it's quicksand or whatever term works for you, that's fantastic. On the Netflix show, you'll remember that they were fighting so much. finally gave them a tool to be able to cool down and step away from a fight. By the way, this happened on the first conversation where I met them. I asked them to come up with a word that would
Starting point is 00:28:07 instantly signal that one of them needed time to think. And they chose quicksand, as in we're sinking in quicksand and I want to take a break. This is a great lesson you can adapt for your own life, whether you are solo or in a relationship. If you find yourself spinning or catastrophizing or fighting, You can literally call it out with a word. Some guests on my show have done this. They've identified with an angel and a devil on their shoulder. And they say, I'm not going to listen to you right now, Mr. Devil. Others use words like Quicksand.
Starting point is 00:28:38 You choose. And if you want more techniques like this, this is where a skilled cognitive behavioral therapist can help you ongoing. All right, how many of you have a parent or a loved one that clicks on every link they get in their old email inbox? I have a friend that is constantly having to go over to her parents' house, wipe out whatever random pop-up is appearing on her dad's browser because he basically just clicks whatever comes in his inbox.
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Starting point is 00:31:14 plus free croissants in every box when you go to wildgrain.com slash remit to start your subscription. That's right, free croissants in every box and $30 off your first box when you go to wildgrained.com slash remit. That's wildgrained.com slash remit or you can use promo code remit at checkout. Okay, now the opposite question, where are you still stuck? So it might be, you know, I'm sure there's some detailed questions and I definitely want to talk about those. But bigger picture, where do you feel stuck still? Well, I'm better now at managing money than I was before the show, but I'm not where I want to be.
Starting point is 00:32:01 Sure. You know, like kind of like I was telling you, like, you know, how I'm stressed out right now about some things financially and me learning, like, you know, how to be better invest. I feel like there is more potential for Matt to have more incomes than just the Airbnb. and B, I believe that he could do, like, what I'm doing where he can have, like, a full-time job where we can add even more income, you know, $100K plus that will allow us maybe to invest in more properties or whatever. While he could still be a property manager, like, I want him to be there to get out of his comfort zone and be able to juggle both, like, you know, a career and I guess being, you know, his own boss, you know what I'm saying? I think there, too. And as far as like our relationship, like, we're not there 100% as far as managing money together. like we still don't share accounts. I feel like that's something like that we need to like still work on.
Starting point is 00:32:51 And like that's the part. It's we're still like not there yet. I appreciate the honesty on all of those. Some of those are about you. Some of those are feelings or attitudes towards Matt and then some of them are together. Why don't you have joint accounts? I mean, as she said, you know, like she's still hesitant on turning any financial responsibility over. So I don't even manage the finances of the Airbnb that I manage.
Starting point is 00:33:27 So that was a recurring thing, right? Because when you wrote me, you said that you had no access to the family financials. And would you say you have access now? I've been told I still have zero access. You've been told by whom? By my wife. You're not quite sure if you should trust him yet and we're talking about matt who is the father of two children not like trusting him it's more i want to you know how the Airbnb thing happened like where he showed his value and not like i fully trust him right then i i always do like a testing right so i was like okay i see what you would do with a credit card that we you want to test it's not enough to like obviously cover like a lot of the bills it's just for now i was just paying the mortgage and whatever you know left over for himself
Starting point is 00:34:14 So that's why I'm saying we're not there. There's so much more rude to grow. I want to offer you another tool. Like I offered you Quicksand when I was with you. So when you're at work, you've got these different coworkers. I'm guessing that you don't test them. I'm guessing that you assume positive intent and you give them anything they ask for. And then maybe if they mess up, you're like, okay, I'm not going to deal with that person.
Starting point is 00:34:42 I had to learn that when I started. working like out of college, you prefer America. That was a huge slap in the face because, um, delegating was one of my weaknesses, right? And I was like,
Starting point is 00:34:54 I can't do it all. I was working until midnight. I was like, I'm burning out. I have to trust my team and my people. And honestly, like, it's great,
Starting point is 00:35:04 you know, like I thrive more that I trust them. Um, I still kind of like, you know, be a quarterback and manage to make sure that everything is on, is on track. and I just can't seem to copy and phase that in my personal life yet, which is weird.
Starting point is 00:35:19 Well, let's try it. Let's try it. Okay. That's good. You see that. I appreciate that. This is what I mean when I say trust is still an issue. Look, personally, I completely disagree with Amani. But me telling her she's wrong will not do anything. I notice she's made some steps, which is a great sign. What I'm trying to do here is to create analogies so she can make the connection herself. That's because she has to get it. She has to realize the cost of what she's doing. And also see that when she trusts Matt, he can deliver. Of course, Matt plays a role in this too. The communication could be improved in a big way. Now, with all of that said, considering they now own two houses with Airbnb income and they have two kids, I think it's crazy that he has no
Starting point is 00:36:04 access to the family financials. You cannot have a partner if you treat them like a child. The good news is they're making steps and all of this could change step by step if they make the decision to do it. Seriously, looking at these numbers and with your income and the Airbnb income and the potential house income, you could be in a stellar position. Stellar. The weakest we've been. I see the potential. First, I get rid of the other house. That's like my biggest drag going on for me right now.
Starting point is 00:36:40 Everything else falls from that. Get rid of that house. Do not let the tail wag the dog. Just get rid of it, even if you have to take way less than you thought. It's okay. You know, there's this phrase that we use,
Starting point is 00:36:54 which is that your future is bigger than your past. And when I was going to make some tough decisions in my business, I kept saying, well, oh, I already worked so hard and I don't want to have to start again. And what I realize is I've got 40 years plus ahead of me. So why am I letting this three years behind me dictate the rest of my life? Your future together is bigger than your past. You can't have a successful marriage if you're constantly playing with
Starting point is 00:37:25 one hand behind your back. Maybe a successful marriage is about going all in. We made this decision together. We had children together. We live together. Maybe it's about assuming that things are going to go right and also having the confidence to know that we can handle it if things go wrong. That's how I would look at it. And once you have that, you're going to know exactly what to do. And hey, send me an email when you sell your house. I'm like waiting. That's so happy. I cannot wait. Amani, you asked about my texting me. If you have questions, let me give you my number right now. You can text anytime. Matt, feel free to text anytime as well with any questions. So let me give you this number.
Starting point is 00:38:11 You know, if you have questions that come up, we spend so much time together. Of course, I'll be happy to answer them. So just text me anytime. All right. Honestly, that was awesome to catch up with Matt and Amani. I haven't seen them since the last scene, the last time we filmed. And just to see the two of them smiling and talking is completely different than the first time I met them. And I remember, they were actually the first.
Starting point is 00:38:37 couple the first day who I shot with. And I remember sitting on their couch and they were arguing in front. And I was like, this really happening. It's really different than seeing in my office and doing my podcast. So I just want to reflect on a few lessons that I took away from Matt and Amani. First off, I see lots of better communication. They're actually talking to each other. They're asking questions. Now, of course, they have work to do. I think Amani can delegate a little bit more effectively. She can assume positive intent. I think Matt can be more specific with what he wants and why. And I think both of them can create a vision together. That's really what's lacking in Matnamania and many couples. In fact, almost no couples have a
Starting point is 00:39:29 joint, rich life vision. But that can be fixed, right? They have a vision, what do we want to do, date night, and they've started to get little elements of that. I want more for them. The second lesson is that having a high income actually does solve most financial problems, but not all. I want to emphasize this. A lot of times, you know, when you look at people with financial problems, one of the most obvious things is that there's a limit to how much you can cut, but no limit to how much you can earn. And if you're making $35,000 a year, it's going to be very, very difficult to get ahead.
Starting point is 00:40:11 And that's why I'm such a fan of more affordable housing and affordable health care and all those things. But at a certain point, like I said, there's just a limit to how much you can cut. In this case, Amani has a very high income, hundreds of thousands of dollars, and she's young. So incredible in her career. That helps a lot.
Starting point is 00:40:30 And the fact that Matt is now generating income through that Airbnb and managing it also fantastic. The problem is they have not adjusted their spending. And as Amani admitted, she goes, well, I never thought I'd be making this much and having these kinds of problems. They need to tighten this up. And that brings me to my third point, which is they have to become intentional with their money. A lot of the things that I see happening are something in full. front of Matt and a mani, and then they jump on it. Like, oh, we saw this house. We should buy it. Uh-oh, we got to sell this house. We should sell it. Credit card debt, 401k, et cetera.
Starting point is 00:41:09 It's like jumping from one thing to another. It's financial whackamol. And what I would like for them to do is to become much more intention. Here's the percentage we're going to be putting towards X, towards Y. Here's how many vacations we're going to take. If I make more than I projected in the conscious spending plan, I'm going to take 75% and put it towards investments and 25% and use it for fun. That's the level of intentionality I want. Now, whether or not you're making $350,000 a year, or whether you're making $100,000 a year or $40K, you can use those same principles, better communication, increasing your income by negotiating your salary, you're starting a side business, or getting more intentional with your money. I really enjoyed talking to them.
Starting point is 00:41:56 And as I mentioned to them, they were so honest. I mean, they were arguing. They were telling me how they felt. Amani was telling me about her childhood. So was Matt. And to be able to reconnect with them, just it feels awesome to see their progress. So Matt and Amania, I want to thank you for coming on the show and sharing your follow-up story with all of us. And I want to encourage you to watch Matt and Amini's full story.
Starting point is 00:42:21 It's actually unbelievable when you see it on my Netflix show. how to get rich. Thanks for listening to I Will Teach You to Be Rich. I'm Rameet Sati. Please follow the show on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. If you haven't read I Will Teach You to Be Rich, my book, pick up a copy.
Starting point is 00:42:45 You can get it at any bookstore or any library, and it will show you the specific tactics for how to build the I Will Teach You to Be Rich system into your personal finances.

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