Motivation Daily by Motiversity - LIVE FOR YOURSELF - Alex Hormozi Powerful Motivational Speech

Episode Date: July 2, 2025

What happens when you stop living for someone else's approval and start chasing your own dreams? This is the story of Alex Hormozi, a man who made the bold decision to disappoint his father in order to stay true to himself.Special thanks to:Chris WilliamsonThe Diary of a CEOTom BilyeuLewis HowesSpeakers:Alex Hormzoi https://www.youtube.com/@UCUyDOdBWhC1MCxEjC46d-zw Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello listeners, Motivosity is excited to share that we have launched a new podcast called Morning Motivation by Motivore. If you are looking to start your day with positivity and the most uplifting motivational audio, this is the show for you. For today's episode of Motivation Daily by Motivority Podcast, we are sharing a recent episode from the Morning Motivation Podcasts. If you like it, go follow the show. New episodes are being released every week. The link is in the description. I was 22. I had done everything that my dad had wanted me to do at this point.

Alex Hormozzi woke up one day, realized he had been living life for his parents. Then, made the hardest decision of his life. Sometimes you have to let other people's dreams for your life die, for years to live. And for me, it was like when I When I continued to every day not want to wake up, that was my wake up call where I was like either I continue to live this way and not want to be alive or I just risked the fact that I'll die to everybody else. I was looking out from the condo that I had been able to buy with this job that I had.

And I was like, is this it? And the whole time, I just really didn't enjoy my life. And it was just, you know, not wanting to wake up. And it was the decision to leave Baltimore, which is where I was from, to quit that path, to decide to start the business of my own, was still to this day the hardest thing I never know. Because I had no siblings. I basically had no mother. I had just a father. And so, like, his approval was literally everything. And he disapproved of the path that I wanted to take in my life. And so I think a lot of these mental faculties are these. these little frameworks or these isms just came from like, how can I combat this incredibly booming voice in the background? Because like when I look at what I was doing at the time, like, I was a consultant. I, you know, I graduated in three years. I took the consulting job. I did all

the things. But the craziest thing was at the moment that my father was most proud of me and he approved of my life the most was when I was the saddest. And so that's when I was like, maybe his approval isn't the right way to feel good about life. And so that that started basically the six-month journey from when I decided that I wanted to change my life until when I changed it. I moved to California to start a gym or get into fitness. And I got there and the guy who I said I was going to mentor under was like, where are you staying? And I was like, I don't know. I just got here. And he's like, what do you mean you don't know? I was like, I don't know. I just showed up. And so he went, he said I could sleep at his place that night. The next morning went to the gym and he got

on a chair and said, hey, who here is going to house this kid? And one guy came up to me. He was like, I'll give you a room. So I rented one room in a house for 400 bucks a month. And then when I left that room to start sleeping at the gym, I remember being actually kind of excited about it. I remember being like, man, this is going to be a big story. Yeah, this is my rocky cutscene, right? The thing is that the rocky cutscene lasts 30 seconds in the movie. But it can last five years in your life. My first gym was underneath of a parking garage.

And so there's these metal dividers in the ceiling. And so cars would drive over this, and it's a concrete box. And so it sounded like a gunshot, like do-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-ch. And it would happen at all hours of the night. And probably the most painful from an emotional perspective experience that I would have on a regular basis was that it was also abandoned enough parking a lot that college kids, kids my age, would go up and party on the roof. And so, like, while they were partying literally above my head and making noise that would prevent me from sleeping, I would be down below in a dark warehouse in a city that I knew no one. Like, I was from Baltimore. I drove across the country.

I went to Huntington Beach. I literally knew no one. and no one knew me. And so I'm sleeping there. And then I realized that I can't really sleep at night. And so I'm taking basically, I'm living on naps for the first six months of the gym. And like homeless people are sleeping in my parking lot and I have to like go out and tell them to like go away. And then I get back, lock the door.

And I go back on the astro turf, which is where I slept with a blanket and a pillow. And I bring this up because like the visceral feeling that you go through when you're going through the mound of shit period or the shit eating what feels like a marathon is that it's it becomes a 30 second sound bite in my story yeah but it was years I hated living the life that my dad wanted me to live I was I was his bitch that's what it was I was his bitch I was living his dreams out not my sometimes your parents dreams have to die in order for years to live and for me I realized that the idea that my father had of me as his son, that image had to die in order for the image of myself

that I wanted to be to live. I think when I was like sleeping on the actual floor of the gym because I couldn't afford two rents was when it like really hit me that no one was coming to save me. And like if I failed, I would have to go back until my daddy was right. And that felt like worse than death for me. And then as soon as I opened my gym, I was like, oh shit, how do I pay rent? And someone walked in the door and I was like, please give me money. I promise.

And I had no equipment in my gym because I couldn't afford any. So it's an empty gym with just turf. And I was like, I promise you, I will get you amazing results. And they were like,

are you going to be here tomorrow? And I was like, I sleep here. I have to be here. It's impossible for me to not be here. I can't leave. I can't leave, right? And so the early people

took pity on me when they literally paid the first 29 numbers I signed up in the first two weeks before the gym opened was from pity. It wasn't from charisma. It was pure pity.

I'll be real with you. And it was the exact amount that I needed to pay rent. And I remember the first month of rent that I paid with this is actually wild. I only, I only looked at this in retrospect. I made exactly $4,972 my first month of my gym. My rent was $4,972. And I remember working like a dog to get that. I'd never made money in my life.

Like I'd never like really asked anyone for money. And all of a sudden I'd come up $5,000 in a month. And then at the end of the month, I watched it go to zero. And then I was like, I have to do it again. And that was when like the reality of the situation of like there was no escape. There was no one who was going to come to save me. And there was, I couldn't blame my dad. I couldn't blame my mom.

I was the one who had chosen this life. But the alternative was that I had to go back to my father a failure and have him look in the eyes and say, I told you. Come here. Come here. Come here. Come here. This fitness stuff.

This starting room. It's for later. It's fine. Just go back. Hey, you've got this, you've got this great degree. You've got, just go to the, go to the business school. to do the thing. And I knew exactly what had happened, but what would have happened after that is that for the rest of my life, he would have had absolute authority over everything that I did.

And that felt like death. So I had the gyms, and I opened up multiple after that, got to about six locations, sold those, started a gym turnaround business, did that for two years. All the while, we weren't really, you know, we were like, okay, in touch. And then we started the licensing business, which was gym launch, and that's the one that way. really took off. We did the only thing we knew how to do, which was at market and sell. And that was how we got out of that. And honestly, that single skill of being able to generate leads independent of the industry has been like my get out of jail free card, which has allowed me to fail over and over and over again until finally, you know, I got it right. And even after that

one, when we were at the rock bottom there, 90 days earlier, got in a DUI, my mom was in the hospital, really bad shape. That's when I had just lost all the money, which is when I pulled her aside, but then fast forward six months basically repeated the cycle again. And only then did we accidentally pivot into the licensing model, which ended up becoming the thing that was like the first very big success that we had. But like that whole period of time was five years of basically not having anything. Even though on, you know, on paper when I had the gyms, I materially looked successful because we had six locations. But I always just put all my money back into each, you know, each new location, so I had very little actual cash.

A lot of people would probably go through that mental situation and think, and I'd went through this, was thinking, I just wasted the last five years. Like, I literally started to change, like put everything into the second location, put everything in the third location, the fourth location, it kept going, right? I kept doubling down, and then I get my big payday, and I put it all on black, and then it disappears with one spin of the roulette. And so here I am, and I'm like, I have nothing to show for the last five years of work. But then in the next 12 months, I made more money than I'd ever made in my entire life. That's why since that moment, where I lost everything,

and then I was able to make more in the next 12 months, I realized that no work is wasted. Because I am the output of the work, not the outcome. Sometimes you have to let other people's dreams for your life die, for years to live. And for me, it was like when I, when I continued to every day not want to wake up, that was my wake up call where I was like, either I continue to live this way and not want to be alive,

or I just risk the fact that I'll die to everybody else. People only root for people who don't need it. The amount of times when I was on my lonely path where I was too different from the friends that I had but not successful enough to be friends with the people that I wanted to be friends with, that's when you want people to root for you. That's when you want people to support you.

Once you've already won, people are like, he's amazing, he's so good, But like that's the time when you need it the least. People struggle to do things alone. And the path of the exceptional person is one of an exception, which means that you are not with other people. And rather than fighting that or bemoaning it, see it as an indicator that you're on the right path.

Because if everyone else were cheering you on, then it means you're not in the right place because it means you're just like everyone else and that's not where you want to be. You always have to be the person who roots for you before everyone else does. And it's usually a single clap in the auditorium for a very long period of time. It is a slow clap that's just you, rooting for you. I think most people feel really lonely when you want something that doesn't currently exist. And so some people call that dream, some people call that goals, whatever it is. You're trying to pull something from your mind into reality.

And you want it done a certain way. And if it's not done that way, it's not what you imagine. And so people on the outside will throw stones and call you names that they think will change your behavior and get you to stop. And the more I have been the person trying to pull things into reality, the more I've tried to weather and build kind of defenses against those things. So that when those stones get hurled at you by being called a control freak or by saying you micromanage things or that you have incredibly high standards, the answer is yes, because I want it done. right the first time. Everybody when I was sleeping on the gym floor, right? Like, you know, I was the underdog. You know, my clients were all like, oh, good for you. You know, you're going after your dream. They'd see my blanket and my pillow in the corner of the gym and they knew I was sleeping there.

And it was evident. You know, I lived there. I didn't have a shower to go to the YMCA, I had a go shower. And everybody was like pro me. And then people would come in, they sign up like, I'm going to support you, right? And then within nine months, I had hired people and I had a manager and I pulled up and I remember I walked in the lobby and all the same, the same people were like, ah, boss man's here. Oh, you're not too good for us now, right? And I remember being so jarred by the experience and I was like, you guys rooted for me. And I was like, and now I did what you said you were rooting for me to do. And that was when I realized that people want you to do well, but not better than them. There's this period of discomfort when you change anything because everyone around you wants you to fit within the label that they are comfortable with.

But they also have the anchor of what you were before. Yeah, exactly. And so they try and like people don't like that. And so they're like, no, no, I like you in this box. So just say, I know, you're having a little thing right now. Don't worry. Just just, and they just want to shove you back into it. And there's a lot of uncomfortable conversations that you have to have where it becomes really socially awkward.

And so like I said one the other day about like going home for the holidays and the reason I don't like doing it is because often I have to confront a lot of people that I haven't seen in a long time and they'll speak to me in a way that I don't like. And before that I would roll it off like whatever, no big deal. But I don't accept that. If you're going through that right now and like I promise you, every single person who wants to do something with their life and has done something with their life, has gone through the exact chapter that you're going through. And it's the lonely chapter. It's the

chapter where you don't fit in with your own friends, but you don't have the outcomes yet to fit into a new group of friends. And you're doing this thing. You're consuming content on the internet. You're doing these free tutorials online to try and figure out how to set up a podcast and where do I host this thing. And you're going through this and you're like, is this even worth it? Because you have no signs of success, right? But if there's anything that you can take away from what we're saying right now is that the sign of success is the hate that you get along the way. And what you can't do is bend the knee to their hate and fit back into the conformity because it's comfortable and it's warm because like in the Matrix,

when Trinity opens the door, when, when Neo's about to go take the red pill, and he wants to get out of the car, she says, You know that right exactly where it is. And I know that's not where you want to be. And then he closes the door. Like right now, this moment that you're going through, is Trinity opening the door and being like, you could go back. But then you'd have to remember exactly what the reason was that you decided not to go out to

begin with, just because you listen to this podcast and you consume this content. You're like, I can fucking do more than this. The skills that you develop along the way, like Steve Jobs learning calligraphy, that then became Apple fonts that transformed how we type, those early days, that little trench winning in the weeds oftentimes gives you these huge advantages later on because you have more context than anyone else. And so rather than lament them and hate the fact that you're going through it, remembering that these will be arrows that you put in the quiver that you're going to be using to slay the future bigger dragons.

And so expecting it to be easy is what makes it much harder than it ever is. I'd say one of the strongest mental frames that has gotten me through my hardest times is thinking this will be the story that I will one day tell. And that means the harder it is, the bigger the dragon, the more epic the story. and by consequence, the more epic the hero. And if you think about the difference between winners and losers, winners define themselves by what they made happen. And losers define themselves by what happened to them. And the difficult part of the lonely chapter is

that the rocky cut scene lasts 90 seconds in the movie and lasts five years in reality. the first time you squat, you're orienting yourself to your environment. You're barely actually squatting. You're just looking like you have a bar on your back. But you learn so much between that first rep and your 10,000th rep of squats. And so I think for most people, it's like if I can just decrease the action threshold for people to begin and be okay with the fact that they're going to suck and it is okay to suck, it is you should expect to suck. And it would be unreasonable for you if you haven't done it before.

And so it's like, are you asking the universe to be unreasonable for you by, expecting to be good on your first try. And I think that's where a lot of people, it's the expectation that destroys their ability to be successful because they expect to win on the first shot, and no one does. It's not speed of activity, it's elimination of waste. There's all these other things that people are distracting.

They're distracting themselves with. And so if you were that young man, you have to recognize the trade-offs that you have to be willing to make. You have to change your environment so you can change your behavior. And you have to delete everything that's not the thing that you want most. And if you can't decide what you want most, and that's what you need to do first. But once you know what you want, then go get it.

People want the confidence before the reps. But especially in confidence, the proof comes before the pudding. You have to do the reps before people are like, wow, because you can fake confidence, but not to yourself. You'll know. And as far as I'm concerned in life,

I'm the only one I'm trying to impress. And so if I know I'm fake, I'm the one who in the middle of the night is looking up being like, I can't believe himself, I would hate that. It's an empty life. It's also living for other people. And so if the toxic trade is people wanting the outcome without the repetition, right, it's without the price.

That's how I say that's number one. The second one is, has everything to do. It's an offshoot, but it's entitlement, right? And is fundamentally believing you deserve things. You have to be willing to trade the things you love right now for the things you want. And you may not like the part. price of what you want, but you can't change the price. And so there's all this groveling that goes back and forth for younger men of like basically wishing it didn't cost this much time or cost as much

failure or cost as much risk in order to get to where they want to go. And so they basically stop their heels and then, you know, retreat inwards into their basement and video games and whatever else rather than confronting their own inadequacy. Because the first thing you have to do is say, it's my fault. Everything that I have in my life is my fault. But if it's your fault, it's also under your control to change. Because you cannot change what you do not control. And so, to me, it's taking full accountability.

If you have a belief and you can't explain why you believe it, it's not yours. It's someone else's. And most people walk around parroting other people's words for the vast majority of their lives. And so they basically act as recorders where they clicked recorded at one part of the life and then they click play in another time of their life. And they're just clicking record, play, record play, record play over and over again. And the reason there's that, in my opinion, that other self that's behind it is because none of those words are yours. And so it makes sense that people feel alone and they feel like they're acting because they never say what they think.

and as a result they also sound like everyone else because they were never themselves to begin with giving myself permission to be unhappy for an extended period of time in order to get what I wanted gave me so much relief from honestly I don't like using the word nowadays because it has so many associations but just from like the depression or the funk that I was in for a few years right yeah I just I just didn't like my life and I I had achieved by most measures, because I don't have the, I, you know, school failed me. I was a whatever. Like, I wasn't that.

I finished in three years. I did really well in school and I had a really good job. But it was empty for me. And so my, like, my goal is things we talked about earlier, but my personal goal is to squeeze every ounce of potential out of whatever I have. And I think that if you feel like you have potential left over, then it will eat you alive until you do something about it.