Nightcap - Nightcap Gone Wild: Unc's quirks, Ocho can't spell, and fans tell raunchy sex stories Relive the craziest moments of Nightcap, including Shannon Sharpe & Chad "Ochocinco" Johnson's wildest monents from the live show in Atlanta, Houston & Dallas.
Episode Date: September 21, 2024Relive the craziest moments of Nightcap, including Shannon Sharpe & Chad "Ochocinco" Johnson's wildest monents from the live show in Atlanta, Houston & Dallas.03:14 - Introduction03:20 - Och...o's favorite smells07:46 - Unc showers 4 times a day !?!?14:52 - Spello Cinco LIVE30:15 - Sex or Next31:36 - Shannon's pregame ritual38:00 - The Relle Report42:15 - Terrell Owens joins the show46:12 - Spello Cinco58:40 - Eating Booty: Pros and cons01:06:10 - Unc loves Toronto01:11:56 - Ocho pranks Unc1:18:30 - Shannon gives wisdom(Timestamps may vary based on advertisements.)#Volume #ClubSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Hey,
hey, buddy trippin'.
Hey, can I tell you something about some weird
smells that I enjoy?
Like, listen, I'm dead serious.
I'm dead serious. Chat, chat, y'all stay with me now.
I enjoy it too, but I can't say it.
Weird smells that I really enjoy on the petting zoo.
I like the smell of going to the fair and going into the petting zoo.
It's weird. The smell of gasoline, not just any gasoline.
Anybody in here that rides dirt bikes in a chat or anybody that rides Yamaha Banshees.
The smell of that type of gasoline, the mixture of the gasoline.
That's weird.
Petting Zoo gasoline.
What's another weird smell
that I enjoy that would be odd
for most people?
Like at the circus.
The smell of circus,
like circus animals.
It's stupid.
It might seem stupid to some people, but.
Yeah.
What?
That's it.
That's the three windows.
What other smell that you love?
What?
Cigar.
Oh, cigars?
No, it ain't.
It's another one.
Nah, it's another one.
That's it, huh?
I don't do nothing else.
There ain't a smell. There ain't a kind of like a weird
smell that you love. You got it. You got it.
Now you got some people. I'm lost.
What? Okay.
It depends on what you talk.
Chat.
Yeah. Yeah.
The chat got it.
That ain't got no smell. If it got a smell,
I shouldn't be there.
Yeah, that got a it. That ain't got no smell. If it got a smell, I shouldn't be there. Yeah, if that got a smell, I ain't
supposed to be there. Now, I do like
it a little tart. Now, you know, sometimes
Yeah, a little
tart. Listen.
Ain't nothing wrong with that now.
Ain't nothing. A little tart.
It has to have a natural
odor.
Like all that, putting all that shit, Victoria's Secret bullshit and all that it has to have a natural odor and ordinance to it
like all that putting all that
shit Victoria's
Sugar bullshit and all that
all that dumb stuff
where it tastes fruity that's dumb
so listen it needs to have
oh okay
I ain't trying to yell at you
leave your stuff as is.
How it's supposed to naturally be.
It's supposed to have like a little tartness to it.
Like when you put your tongue on the battery,
it's supposed to have like a little
twang to it.
I kid you not.
I mean, you should know.
I'll take your word for it. I believe you.
I'm cutting back. I don't you should know. I'll take your word for it. I believe you. I'm cutting back. I don't eat pork.
Man, don't you need help, man.
Hey, why they took the video down? It wasn't that bad.
It was kind of harmless. I think it was done in more
of a facetious manner. I don't think
that was really serious.
But, Ojo, you eat
the other, you, I mean, you
eat something, too. You right around the corner, so you drop
in with that. Sniffing the tongue
ain't nobody's fault.
But that's different.
Yeah, yeah.
It's different yeah that's different
ain't nothing different
you right around the corner
just drop in
if you got
we got two homeboys we live in the same neighborhood
and we one door down they gonna see you
hey man I'm gonna stop by sharp house
you right around the corner.
They're on special occasions.
You're right there, Ocho.
Special occasions.
Special occasions, you know.
Oh, hey.
If you're toes, there ain't nothing special.
Ain't no special occasion until you're on them toes.
So I know you're on the mother hole.
When you go to the car wash and you want a detail,
that's what it's like. that's what it's like.
Sometimes you got to
detail the car. Sometimes you go
in there for a spit shine.
You're in and out.
Sometimes you want a detail.
You want the works.
Carpet, take the mats out, hang the mats
up, vacuum the mats.
Put the arm... She better have no mats. You know? Put the arm, put the...
She better not have no mats.
She better have arms and floors.
I'm just giving an example.
That was a good one.
That was a good one.
That was a good one.
Okay.
That was a good one.
You need help, Ocho.
I'm good.
I'm good.
I'm good.
I'm good.
I'm good.
Somebody help Ocho.
Before the game, Keon Coleman
revealed the chores he hates more
than anything. You ever scrubbed the baseboards?
They're talking like janitors.
I ain't washing. Ish. I'm putting it
in the dishwasher.
Nah, I ain't washing no dishes, Ocho.
I ain't washing no dishes.
I said, well,. Listen, I... I said...
Well, Unc, I'm...
You know, I'm...
I'm very cheap.
You know, I don't wash no dishes
because I use paper plates.
I use recyclable.
I buy...
It's recycled when I buy it.
But I ain't recycling it again.
Okay.
Okay, okay. I see what you mean.
I try to keep my water bill down low
so I don't want to use my dishwasher.
I try to keep my water bill down low.
I don't want to use
washed dishes.
That's an unnecessary
expense, so I try to keep it under
$30 a month.
I've done well doing it.
Nah, bro.
That's unnecessary, Unc.
Come on.
Listen, you're overdoing it.
You're overdoing it. You're overreacting.
Now you're going to scrub your goddamn skin off.
There's no need to get in the shower
three full times a day.
I know,
you get,
you get,
get,
wake up in the morning,
you shower.
I shower.
Some activities,
you run your errands,
you hit the gym.
Yeah.
Come home by 12,
two o'clock,
you shower.
Now there's no need
to take another shower
again.
Maybe before you go to bed,
hold on,
maybe before you go to bed
so you don't,
you don't get in bed dirty.
Yep.
You know, but come on.
Check this out.
You being a little excessive.
Let's just say for the sake of argument, on a Monday, and I got nightcap.
So I get up.
Obviously, I got first take.
So I take a shower about 6.15.
Get dressed, come downstairs, ask them to call Shelly.
Shelly done let Ash and Jordan in.
So when I come down, they in here.
They done got everything fired up.
We done did the check. I'm going to come in, I'm going to
sit down probably about 6.50, do a
mic check at about 6.53, 6.54.
We good to go.
All right, I'm going to go up, I'm going to eat,
eat breakfast,
chill for a little bit, then I'm
going to go to the gym.
I come home, I'm going to take a shower.
Now,
I'm going to take it, if I'm tired, like, man, gang will come on late.
Let me go and get me a nap.
I'm going to take me a nap.
And then I got to get up and take a shower.
I got to wake up, Ocho.
I got to wake up.
Okay.
Then, guess what, Ocho?
I got to go do cardio.
Then I got to come back in.
I got to take another shower because I'm all sweaty.
Oh, man.
Come on, man.
I got to take another shower because I'm sweaty.
That's too much.
Oh, so you want me to come on nightcap smelling like Get Back?
Oh, you can smell me.
We ain't going to know because
we looking at you.
We look.
We can't.
That's I mean, that's just too much.
I know you want to be crazy.
You want to be a guy.
You got to be crazy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Only six times a day.
Only six times.
Think how many times. Think how many times,
think how much water
you wasting
brushing your teeth
six times a day.
Think how much water
you wasting
showering three
and four times a day.
Like,
that's a lot of water.
That's a lot of usage, man.
I said,
Lord,
now if you do,
I done prayed to you
many nights.
I done fell on my knees
many a night.
And I know my granny done prayed many a night.
Right.
You ever give me some indoor?
You ever give me some running water inside my house?
And I ain't got to take no tub bath no more?
You can use it.
No foot tub, no tent tub.
I ain't got to take.
Right.
Man, please.
I ain't got what?
You ain't got to heat the water the water you gotta heat the water you had
to heat it up or like when i was working in the fields oh joe we'll fill the foot the wash tub
we call them 10 some people call them 10 tubs some people call them wash tubs number two number
three wash tub 10 tub whatever you want to call it so we said we feel you know put it half three
quarters away full and leave it in the sun got Got that warm water. See, I get that thing right there on choke.
See, back then, they had no ivory soap.
Yeah.
That's all we ever had.
It floats.
See, ivory soap be floating.
Yeah, I know about ivory.
I used to use ivory, too.
I said, Lord, if you ever, if you ever give me an opportunity,
put me in a situation, and I can take a bath whenever I want to as many times I want to
man I wish I would
take one shower a day I've never taken
one shower a day that ain't gonna happen
I don't care if I don't do nothing if I don't leave my house
the first thing I do I'm gonna take a shower when I get up
in the morning I'm gonna do that every morning
and I'm gonna take another one before I go to bed
for one
real
if I'm in the shower, don't
get in the shower with me because you goddamn
had a hot water too motherfucking hot.
Number one.
Number one. If you do,
the one time when we first met,
can I get some water?
Yes.
I'm in the back of the shower cold.
You hogging the water.
Never again. It's been five years. you'll never ever step foot in the shower
ever again
the water be boiling
the water be boiling hot
what you doing
women do have that water a little bit
too hot now
I don't understand
how they do that
so I don't sweat how they do that I take a cold shower Ocho so I don't sweat
there ain't nothing worse
than taking a shower
and you sweat
so a lot of times
I take a cold shower
so I feel good, you open up the pores
especially in the morning
now in the morning Ocho, I take a cold shower
before I go in the air, open up the pores
refresh me I get some cold shower before I go in the air. Over the point, refresh me.
You know, I get some
cold pack, get some ice pack. Right, right, right.
Put on my eyes so, you know, get that puff in the
side, get the swelling out. So, I'm coming
out of them bright eyes like, oh, yeah,
you're feeling good now.
Oh, yeah. Yeah, I don't know about that
cold shower. I can't do that one.
I'm taking a hot shower.
The AC is on in the house.
Wherever I'm going, I'm sure the AC is on.
Cold shower?
Oh, yeah.
But see, I'm a sweater, Ocho.
I can get in the cold tub.
I'm a sweater.
No, Ocho, I'm a sweater, Ocho.
Okay, okay, okay.
So that's understandable.
Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.
Hey, you think old girl a fighter?
Because I'd be enough if she be dabbing my face with one of these.
You know what I'm saying?
You know what I'm saying?
I'm a fighter.
That didn't stop O'Shea, though.
Right.
Yeah. Oh, yeah, for sure. Oh, yeah. Got to have the AC on Shado. Right. Yeah.
Oh, yeah, for sure.
Oh, yeah.
Got to have the AC on, man.
And it's time for, I know one of you guys' favorite segment, Spello Cinco.
Hell nah.
So, check this out.
We couldn't do it the regular way.
Huh?
Oh, man, he ain't got the hat.
I need my hat.
I left my hat in Miami.
I can't find that bitch, man.
Damn.
Oh, man.
Hold on, but I got y'all tonight,
because I ain't going to embarrass myself in front of people, man.
I ain't, no, I got this shit tonight.
I ain't bullshit.
But.
I know. It ain't bullshitting. I know.
It ain't been looking good for the home team.
Nah.
Tonight ain't looking much better, is it?
I promise you.
I promise you.
Listen, anytime I'm in front of a crowd and the camera's rolling, you know, like when I was on the field, I always show up.
I show up when the lights is on.
You show up?
Yeah, I show up when the lights is on, man.
And I ain't finna have any people laughing at me.
Oh, they bright, too.
They bright.
Yeah, they real bright. Yeah, and the crowd right here, so you don't get one wrong. I ain't finna have any people laughing at me. Oh, they bright, too. They bright. Yeah, they real bright.
And the crowd right here,
so you don't get one wrong.
I ain't gonna get shit wrong tonight.
Okay, check this out.
This can't be a regular Spello Cinco.
We're gonna have someone to compete against Ocho Cinco.
Hey!
Yeah, yeah.
Now I went to Harvard now.
You know they finna lose.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And what we now went to Harvard now, you know, yeah
and What we're gonna do we're gonna have two people we have
One somebody's gonna spell a word
This person's gonna spell a word and if Ocho misses and that person gets it they get a wristband and you get a signed bottle
Of Laporte a that you get to pick up at the end of the night
So y'all cheating, man.
How you been cheating?
Y'all cheating.
Well, when I get my word right, what I get?
Huh?
When I get my word right, what I get?
You get a pat on the back.
Congratulations.
Man.
You finally got a word right.
So, Ash, how we...
Oh, we just pick anybody out of the audience.
Oh, okay.
Okay, okay, okay, okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Okay, okay.
Come on, come on.
You in the black hat.
You, you.
Oh, him?
Come on, come on, come on.
We got one.
We got to get a lady.
We got to do it.
Come on.
Yeah, come on.
Nah, bring somebody.
Somebody from up there jump down.
Come on, man.
Okay.
Come on.
You in the hat.
You in the hat.
Come on.
Stay with me.
Yeah, yeah, Ocho.
Hold on. Let me
stretch.
Man,
the liquor stores might be out
of La Portia because I don't think Ocho going to beat
nobody tonight.
Hey,
I'm finna watch this nigga, man.
Hold on, where you from? You from Atlanta?
Columbus. Columbus,
85 South.
Where you went to college?
Columbus State.
Hey, you going to bro, hit your mic.
Don't they be asking all them questions? He tried to bro, hit your mic. How you going? Don't they be asking
all them questions?
I'm just saying.
He's trying to talk you
off your game.
And you drink that liquor?
That man about to beat you
with a cup of liquor.
Now you got it.
That's a portier.
That's two.
Look at that.
I can tell.
That's a portier.
All right, Ocho.
He's from the Lou.
Let him go first.
Let him go first.
No, no, no.
You got to go first.
You go first.
No, I'm just saying.
Hold on.
Give him the first word. No, I don't want him. No, no. You got to go first. You go first. No, I'm just saying. Hold on. Give him the first word, though.
No, I don't want him.
No, no.
You got to go first.
All right, Ocho.
Let's do it.
Ocho is up first.
Your first word, Ocho.
Surveillance.
What?
Surveillance.
The police were surveilling you and your homeboy.
Surveillance.
Hey, speaking of, hey, you know what?
Real quick, real quick.
It's all about Ocho.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Hey, hold on, listen to me real quick.
Listen to me real quick, now.
Now, speaking of surveillance, right?
So a quick story.
Me and my dog Waymo, right?
Yeah.
We went to jail because of surveillance.
Yeah.
The camera was rolling.
Yeah, got you.
Yeah.
So I'm going to spell that bitch.
Okay, spell it.
Surveillance.
S-U-R.
Yep.
V-E.
Uh-huh.
I.
Uh-huh.
L-A-N-C.
E.
L-A-N-C-E. L-A-N-C-E.
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.
That's wrong?
You were close.
Ocho, you were close.
S-U-R-V-E-I-L-L-A-N-C-E.
That's what I said.
What'd you say, ma?
Okay, okay, okay.
What's your name, my man?
Vic.
Hold on, whoa, whoa, whoa.
I said surveillance.
I spelled it right, right?
No, you didn't.
Okay, Ocho.
Ocho, hold on.
Oh, no, the other L's silent.
Yeah, no, no, no, no, no.
Y'all niggas be cheating, man.
No, it might be silent, but you got to say it.
All right, Ocho.
Okay, here's your word.
Sofa.
What?
Come on, man.
That's male.
Ocho, stall it, my man.
Hey.
It's my diso.
Diso.
Diso right here.
S-O-F-A. It's my this old this old this old right iso FA
In the night pick your bottle of final report here back to print
Damn hey you come.
Oh, he done drunk that.
He good.
Hey.
All right.
All right, Ocho.
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.
Let me regroup.
Okay.
Take your time.
Where you from?
North Carolina.
For real?
Woo!
Where you went to college?
Winston-Salem State.
Woo!
Okay.
The Rams.
HBCU.
Okay, okay, okay.
You ready, Ocho?
Hold on.
I don't want the enemy on my side.
You got to go on over there.
Yeah.
You know, ladies first now, huh?
Okay, okay.
All right, Ocho.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Ladies first.
We got to be respectful.
Okay, okay. The word that you have to Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Ladies first. We got to be respectful. Okay, okay.
The word that you have to spell, ma'am.
Water.
Uh, let me think.
Um, W-A-T-E-R?
That is correct.
That is correct.
Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
You know what, Ochoa?
The way we're going to make it fair,
she has to spell three words to your one.
Okay, okay.
She got the person right, okay?
Word number two.
Carpet.
Carpet.
Let me see.
C?
Yep.
A?
Okay.
R?
P?
E?
T?
Correct.
Y'all know she's from North Carolina.
Y'all heard her say it.
R?
R. All right. Last word say it. R. R.
All right.
Last word, Ocho.
Last word.
House.
That's a hard one.
H-O-U-S-E.
That is correct, ma'am.
Ocho.
Yeah, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.
Let me get it right.
Okay, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready.
Give me that thing, give me that thing.
Okay.
You ready?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm locked in, I'm locked in.
The word you must spell, Ocho,
if you do not get this word correct...
I ain't finna lose in front of all these people.
Come on.
Okay.
The word you must spell,
soliloquy.
You got it.
Guys, we got to make him use that one semester Harvard education.
Soliloquy.
Soliloquy.
Soliloquy.
Would you like to phone a friend?
Okay, I'm ready.
Okay.
Y'all think, I got this, I got this.
He got it, he got it.
Leave it alone.
Before you go, I got this. He got it, he got it. Leave it alone. Let him think.
Before you go, before you go.
Soliloquy.
Yeah.
Sound it out.
Right.
Sound it.
Soliloquy.
Soliloquy.
Yes.
Soliloquy.
S-Y.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Start over.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Come on.
Now, he's nervous.
He's nervous.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
I mean, he's really never spelled in front of a live audience.
So, come on.
Now, give him a little grace.
Hold on, hold on.
You know what?
Use it in a sentence for me.
Use it in a sentence.
You know what it is, though, Joey?
It's like when people, they go on and on saying, yeah, I appreciate that soliloquy.
Now, what are you going to do?
Oh, soliloquy.
Soliloquy.
That's it.
Okay.
S-A-L.
Go ahead.
Go ahead.
Keep going.
Go ahead.
Double L-Q-U-E, soliloquy.
That's right.
Did you sound it out?
Soliloquy.
I mean, from the sound of it,
it sounds like you can't spell that word.
I ain't never heard that before.
Okay, it's S-O-L.
That's what I, I say S?
Yeah, S-O-L-I-L-O-Q-U-Y.
How am I supposed to spell that shit?
Be honest.
Who in here know how to spell that without looking at their phone?
Be honest.
Don't lie to me.
Don't lie to me.
Y'all know how to spell that?
Okay.
Okay.
Give me another word, man.
I'm going to give you an easy one.
I'm going to give you an easy one.
Give me an easy one, man.
You're embarrassing me in front of the company, man.
Okay.
How about this, Ocho?
Ac-U-S. I'm going to give you an easy one. I'm going to give you an easy one. Give me an easy one, man. You're embarrassing me in front of the company, man. Okay, how about this, Ocho? Accused.
I did not want to, but I had to accused.
Accused.
Hey, hey, put it on your phone and show it to me.
Oh, you trying to be Slumdog Millionaire.
You wanted to write it on the mirror, huh?
No, I'm just, put it up there.
I don't know how to spell that.
Act, U-S, act.
I know how to spell act, A-C-T.
Q-S, so it might be Q-U-O-E-S-T.
Act, U-S.
No.
A-C-Q-U-I-E-S-C-E.
I will close.
I will close.
Who back there spelling like they do that shit?
Thank you so much for playing.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you. Yeah. Okay, you know what? I'm going to give you a word. Okay, how about this one? Spirit. I know I can spell spirit.
How about this here?
I can spell cheat.
How about this here?
Umbrella.
Who?
Umbrella.
Umbrella?
Yes.
U-M-B-R-E-L-L-A.
Come on, man.
Stop playing.
Stop playing, man.
Stop playing.
This is what I do.
Give me another one.
Give me another one. I'm I do. Give me another one.
Give me another one.
I'm on fire.
Give me another one.
Okay.
Indict.
Huh?
Indict.
Indict?
Yeah, you got indicted for a charge.
You and your homeboy committed that crime.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Nigga, we still on papers for that shit.
Hey, I-N-D-I-C-T.
Come on, now.
Stop playing with me, nigga, man.
What?
What?
Let's go.
Let me get another one.
Give me another one, man.
Give me another one.
I'm feeling good right now, too.
All of us will be going to Magic City after this on me.
Listen, sound it out.
Sound it out.
And it's spelled just like it sounds.
Okay.
Precarious.
Precarious.
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Precarious. Precarious. Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Precarious.
I used to date this chick back in 83
and she was precarious.
Yeah.
P-R-E.
C-A-R.
I-O-U-S.
Now stop playing with me, man.
What y'all talking about, man.
Give me another.
Give me another.
I'm on fire, bro.
I'm on fire.
Hey, I'm on NBA jam fire.
Okay, you okay?
Okay, how about this here?
Connecticut.
The state of Connecticut.
Who?
Connecticut.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Connecticut.
C.
Yep.
O double N.
Uh-huh.
E.
Yeah.
Double T.
It ain't no double T?
No.
Okay, one T.
One T.
But there's a letter in front of that T.
Connecticut.
I ain't never been there.
I don't know how to spell that.
I don't know how to spell that. C-O-N-N-E-C-T-I-C-U-T.
That's too much shit.
That's too much shit.
Thank you, everyone, for participating.
Thank you very much.
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All right, we got one right here, Ocho.
Black hat.
Black hat, okay.
So I'm going to speak for the ladies and the men, okay?
Okay.
All right.
So, y'all, is that like a coat red or I can't speak too provocative?
You ain't never seen our show?
Yeah, we grown up in here.
We grown up in here.
Okay, okay.
Provocative.
So if you a lady, right?
Yeah.
And you like anal, please raise your hand.
Woo!
Lord!
Oh, they shy.
They shy.
They shy.
They shy. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, they shy! They shy! They shy! They shy!
My hair!
What are you doing?
Oh!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
I told you!
Yeah!
Kaboom! Kaboom! I told you! Yeah! That's what I'm talking about!
Come on!
Come on!
I see no, but I see no ladies!
Yeah!
Go ahead!
I'm listening!
But I see no hands!
I see no hands!
I'm so upset again.
If you're a lady and you like anal, raise your hand.
Nobody?
You invite yourself, you invite yourself.
I know you invite yourself, but go ahead.
Okay, okay, okay.
You ever threw up in the game, Ocho?
You ever threw up?
Hell nah, I don't throw up.
But I get my, you know, I eat my McDonald's.
That sit on my stomach real right, you know, proper nutrients.
That's my fuel.
I ain't got time to throw up now.
No, I'm eating by the time we hit the field.
I don't eat.
See, I'm eating, Ocho.
I'm probably eating about 8 o'clock.
8?
8 o'clock in the morning, yeah.
I eat at 10 at the same time, every time. I'm just gonna get what you call them you know get pancakes i will eat french toast
just with bananas uh egg whites right oatmeal glass of orange juice glass of water. I'm good. Yeah. Well, all jokes
aside, my pregame meal,
whether we were playing home or away,
at home, it was
either McDonald's, hotcakes with sausage,
sausage, egg McMuffin, large OJ,
or I go to First Watch, which is on
Walnut right downtown. I go
there at 10 o'clock and I get the trifecta.
Trifecta, it was simple.
It was just French toast, the millionaire bacon, two eggs, scramble, a fruit bowl and a large cranberry juice.
And that was it.
But then I was very superstitious.
I had a situation where I think the first game I ever had a hundred yards.
I had a blueberry Dunkin Donut donut and you kept eating that same goddamn blueberry
dunkin donut huh ever since from 1992 until i retired every game in my locker right three
it was uh i don't know if dunkin donut still does this but they used to do a blueberry cake donut
and they used to do a chocolate chip cake donut.
So I would have them, they would get, if they didn't have the chocolate chip, they would get blueberry.
So I got three blueberry donuts.
I got three packs, a big red
five, your five sticks in a pack
in a pack. Those
and I would have
six Advil
sitting in my locker.
They would give me lineman socks you know lineman socks
six four to six eight i would take those back and get running back socks we had the exchange
had to be like this every game home or away right and mike's gonna come out there and check
84 you don't answer there you go up everything right. Because he was superstitious too.
So, oh yeah.
Once I got to 100 yards,
just like clockwork.
And in Baltimore, they didn't do it. So
when we played the Broncos
in the playoff game,
the equipment managers
brought me the donuts.
Oh, that's live.
Guess what happened? Caught the tip. Oh, that's live. And guess what happened?
Caught the tip, went 58 yards down the sideline.
That's live.
Yeah.
So, yeah, that was – oh, see, there you go.
They know what I'm talking about.
No, it wasn't – when I played,
I don't think Denver didn't have no Krispy Kreme.
So, Dunkin' Donuts was it.
And so, I need y'all Dunkin' Donuts.
If y'all listening, bring those chocolate chip cake donuts back.
I would greatly appreciate it.
I've only been to, I've been to the, you know, Honolulu and I've been to Kona.
Now, what did I go to Kona?
I went, I went marlin fishing.
Marlin?
Yeah.
You caught them big-ass marlins?
I sure did.
I ain't got the patience to reel them shits in for an hour.
Nah.
You can have that.
Sure did.
Oh, now you want to talk about somebody that ain't got no patience. You talk about Unc, you ain't got no patience. you want to talk about somebody that ain't got no patience.
You talk about Unc, you ain't got no patience.
You quick to talk about Unc that ain't got no patience.
Well, I mean, listen, I think out there fishing,
you have no choice but to have patience because you can't go no way
because you're in the middle of the goddamn water.
Yeah, but I'm going out there.
I'm going to catch something.
Yeah, I mean, I just can't do it.
I can't sit there.
Once you get past them damn aggravating ass dolphins
that keep nibbling your, yeah.
I'm like, bro, go away.
Yeah.
Because they, you know, they smart now.
They highly intelligent.
They eat all, they eat, lead ahead.
They eat all around.
Oh, no. There's something
in there.
You drive back in. All you got is a head
on there. Yeah.
Man, stop playing.
Oh, yeah. I would like to go again. I'd like
to catch one by 500 pounds.
No, I want to go wicked tuna. I want to catch me a big old tuna.
Yeah. I mean, the one I caught
only weighed like 150, 175.
Oh, that's it? Oh, that's low.
I bet I know one thing you can't. I bet you don't want to catch a Goliath grouper.
Oh, yeah, but you got to let those things go.
I mean, they can get to be about 700, 800 pounds.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
But I would like to catch one of them old tunas,
probably about 400, 500 pounds. I'll let him go, but I just want to catch one of them old tunas, probably about 400, 500 pounds.
I'll let him go, but I just want to fight him.
I want to fight him for an hour and a half.
Hour and a half?
Maybe two hours?
You mean two hours?
Yeah.
You know, I'm good at fighting for it.
I'm good at fighting a long period of time.
I'm good at fighting a long period of time.
Stay with me now.
Stay with me now. You know what I'm good at fighting a long period of time. Stay with me now. Stay with me now.
You know what I'm saying?
Hell no.
Man, you don't like to fish?
Fuck no.
My bad.
Sorry.
Hell no.
And listen, I've been in Miami all my life.
I don't even go on the water.
I don't understand why people love being on yachts and boats and jet skis
and going fishing.
Hell no.
I don't want to fish.
I just want to fish.
I mean, you know what?
When they get some time off, I'm going to go to time.
I'm going to go to time part and beat him.
That's all I want to do right here.
Hell no.
That's it.
If it ain't got nothing to do with this, don't call me to go out.
Don't call me to do nothing Don't call me to do nothing
You hit me
Send me a DM
Send me your gamer tag
And now
It's time for you guys
One of you guys' favorite segment
The Rail Report
Come on out here Rail
Rail, Rail
Look at Rail
Hey, Rail need a mic, right?
Where's Rel mic?
Get my mic up.
Hey, Rel.
Hey, y'all.
How you doing, Rel?
I'm doing amazing.
You just flew into town today.
You know, Rel sprung in town today. We ain'm doing amazing. You just flew into town today. You know, Rhea sprung in town today.
We ain't doing amazing.
We fucking beefing.
She's like, I'm coming.
I want to see my man.
I've been away from him for a minute, so I'm coming.
I came to support.
Yeah, she came.
Even when we beefing, I still support.
See, that's what you need, don't you?
I mean, listen.
Tamara, let me take my glass off.
Like, we beefing for real.
Like, no bullshit.
I ain't talk to real in six, seven days.
How many days it been?
I've been busy.
Fuck this shit.
I just want y'all to know we beefing for real.
He lying.
You still love us, though?
That's what couples do hold on hold on hold
on let me finish because i'm mad what they used to say scratch your ass and get glass yes
all right right now you're upset i'm mad no bullshit animals get mad humans get upset
so right now you're upset you have a little disagreement you
know rail said it was rainy outside you said it's 70 and sunny and y'all you have a little
disagreement that's what happens couple disagree sometimes oh damn you think it's gonna be great
all the time any couples out there all go yeah they i don't know are you are you going through
it too okay okay hey holler at me after the show.
Oh.
Your lady taking a picture too.
Oh, I like the pictures.
Okay.
Look at that ring.
I see me.
Yeah, look at that.
She all right.
She all right.
Ocho, you got to step on Ocho.
She all right.
You better hold on.
You better hold on. She aight.
You better hold on.
Who?
Women like Rail, they don't come easy.
Make they own money, got they own money.
She can stay.
Rail is a stand alone.
There is not a whole lot of women that can stand alone.
Right.
Rail can carry her own.
Right.
And I know sometimes, look, I'm a lot older than you Ocho
And I can
I'm speaking from experience
I'm speaking
I'm speaking from experience
And it's easy
Like when you get upset
With your partner
And the first thing you go
Shit
Let me see
Let her know what she effing up with
I'm the dude
Yeah
Yeah
Yeah
I'm Ocho now. I'm the dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm Ocho, man.
And I'm motherfucking real.
So, with that being said,
look, this ain't nothing that we can't overcome.
We family.
How about we have, how about this here?
Like, when I go on vacation next year,
you and Ray will host Nightcap.
I believe.
You said you want a...
I want to be on first take.
You going to be on first take?
I want to be on first take.
Bro, when I'm going on first take,
when I take my two months off,
you would take my two days and
your day. No, no, no. I want to come on there
with you and Stephen A. like right now.
I ain't no, I'm on Mondays and Tuesdays.
Okay, I'm going to come on Mondays and Tuesdays.
No, you take the weekend. You take
Thursday and Friday. Ain't nobody watching on
Thursday and Friday. Yeah, they do. That's
leading into the game.
Nah.
Nah.
But first of all, I don leading into the game. Nah. Nah.
But first of all, I don't run first take.
Right.
That's something you gotta take up with Steve today.
All right, don't worry about it.
We good, we good, we good.
And just so y'all know, this ain't no script.
This ain't really, the Real Report is part of the show,
but on God, we really beefing.
Well you gotta keep it reiterated.
Just so they don't think this ain't serious,
this shit serious.
Oh yeah, we beefing for real.
And I'm mad.
I gotta use the bathroom.
Boy, you got kidneys like an old person.
I got a pee-pee.
Go ahead.
Alright.
I'm sorry.
Lord have mercy.
You see this, see what I go through go through this He ain't got no mic on
You good
You good
I'm filling in
For my homie Chad
Okay that's what's up
What's up everybody
What's up Houston
What's good
Did you fly in for this
Or are you here now
I'm here.
I'm local.
My daughter's at Prairie View.
Okay.
She's going to tour.
Pee-Vee.
You know.
What's been circulating lately is that Tyreek racing Noah Lyles.
Tyreek, I don't know what much more attention that he needs.
I mean, he already has enough attention as it is.
But he's not beating Noah Lyles.
I don't care what it is.
What it is.
We made a bet probably three years ago.
He said he would give me like 10 steps.
It was like nine yards, and we raced 100.
100 yards.
He barely made up a yard.
If I get a good start, I can tyreek and that's not that's no cap that's just me being realistic and understanding who i
am and what my my ability you believe you can you you believe you got a great start if i get
if i work if i were if you got a speed coach and says okay ocho we're gonna work with you for three
months and at the end of the show no he ain't doing nothing but at the end of for three months. And at the end of... Ocho? No, he ain't doing nothing.
At the end of those three months,
and he says,
okay, you race Tyreek.
What you want to race him in?
A 40, a 60, a 100?
What you want to race?
He has no chance in the 100 because I'm one of those back...
You want you to unwind.
Yeah, I pick up at the end.
50, 60, that's very competitive.
But if I get a good start,
he going to have a problem. he's going to have a problem.
He's going to have a problem.
But he's not beating Noah Lyles.
That's not, no.
Why do you think he keeps challenging Noah Lyles?
I don't know what much more attention that he needs.
I don't know.
But it's not possible.
He's not about to beat an Olympic gold medalist in nothing.
Ocho thinks he can beat him in a 50.
Ocho ain't beating me in a 50.
No, Ocho thinks Tyreek can beat Noah.
No, he's not beating him in a 50.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
It's about a mindset.
There's, as football players, like I said,
Tyreek is good football speed.
Right.
Hands down, he's one of the fastest in the NFL.
And there are some guys
that will probably challenge him on that.
He didn't race DK Metcalf.
Why?
If you're that fast,
race DK Metcalf. There's Marquise Goodwin,
who was a track guy, Olympic guy.
Why aren't you racing these guys?
Xavier Worthy, who just ran the fastest 40.
Man, you're biting off a little bit more than you can chew
when you're messing with Noah Lyles. What is it you're trying little bit more than you can chew when you messing with Noah Lyles.
Like, what is it? What is it you're trying to get out of this?
But you're not beating Noah Lyles.
You think he's beating Noah Lyles?
I said in the 50 or 60, it'd be close.
He's not. Because he get out so fast.
We've been going at this for years.
You're not even faster than me.
I would admit, you're quicker
than me, but you're not
even a better receiver, B.
Stop playing with me, boy.
I'm Ocho, boy.
It's me, boy.
I'm going to go sit on this couch with that.
This is the yellow jacket couch over here.
You know what I mean?
Hey, homeboy.
Hey, this is the yellow jacket couch over here.
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.
You by yourself. You know I got love for you.
I got a jacket, too.
I made my own.
So, look.
Hey, it's 300.
Listen, hold on, hold on.
I had my own, too, before I got my real one.
Nah, hold on.
It's 300 of y'all.
That's only one of me, nigga.
That's all good.
That's good.
Nah.
Like you said.
And I look better than you.
Nah.
Not happening. Not Nah. Not happening.
Not happening.
Not happening.
Your favorite.
Oh, hell nah.
It's on.
Let me see if I can find my hat, man.
Because last time I had my hat and that was the problem.
My hat right here.
It's got to be in here somewhere.
Let's go.
Damn, man.
I lost my hat, man. Hey, like for real. Come on, Ocho. You got to find the hat, man.
Hey, like for real.
Come on, Ocho. You got to find the hat, Ocho.
I don't know where my hat went, man.
I think Man Rare probably moved my hat, man.
All right, Ocho, you ready?
Ocho, we're going to start y'all.
Okay.
Have we had this?
Chat, I got you on chat.
Right here, here. Okay. Have we had this graphic right here? Chat.
Okay.
Okay.
Oh,
Joe,
we're going to start y'all with an easy one.
Perfunctory.
Her perfunctory.
Perfunctory.
Funkfunctory.
Perfunctory.
Yes. Perfunctory. Perfunctory. Yes, perfunctory.
Perfunctory.
Can you use it in a sentence, please?
Yes.
Let me see.
I'm going to give you the origins also.
Okay.
Okay.
He gave a very perfunctory nod.
Perfunctory.
Okay, a nod of confidence.
Perfunctory.
Okay, you ready?
Perfunctory.
Perfunctory.
Perfunctory.
P-E-R.
P-E-R.
Mm-hmm. Funk. P-E-R Funk F-U-N-C
T-E-R-Y
or Funk 3
What?
You said T-E-R-Y.
No.
P-E-R-F-U-N-C-T-O-R-Y.
Oh, so I was so close on the word.
I never heard of that before.
I never heard it used before in a sentence either.
That was my first time.
I want to.
Yeah, let's go, boy.
And I used it for you. I used it for you to send us to.
You were close, though, Joe.
Hold on. I got this.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow. What happened?
Oh, hell.
Man.
What was wrong with those?
No, we got to get some more words.
Nah, I'm going to get them.
Man, what you talking about?
It's me.
I'm going to yell.
I got to give you a chance to get these.
I'm at the Harvard.
That's this.
Now, all you're doing is yelling.
Okay.
Seiko.
Seiko font.
Seiko font.
Seiko font. Sequel font. Sequel font.
Sequel font.
Sequel.
Oh, cycle.
Cycle font.
Ash says it's cycle font.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Cycle font.
I'm ready.
Cycle.
Cycle font or font?
Cycle font.
Okay. Okay.
P-S-Y-C-O-F-A-N-T.
S-Y-C-O-P-H-A-N-T.
What happened?
I got it right?
God damn, man!
No, you weren't even close.
I sounded the shit out.
It's S-Y.
I'm going to give you this easy one right here, Ocho.
Hold on. Hold on before you give it.
Let me process something real quick.
Okay, you know what?
I don't know.
I'm ready.
It don't matter how difficult it is.
I'm ready.
I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready.
I'm ready. I got to sound it out.
And I got to do like my grandma used to tell me.
Boom, I got to make sure I ask you, use it in a sentence.
And when you use it in a sentence, I have to process everything based on the definition and the meaning of the word and then spell it.
I'm ready.
I'm ready.
I promise you.
Hey, Chad, I got this right here.
I promise you, Chad, on Jesus' sandals, I'm not getting this wrong.
On everything I believe in, everything I stand for, this is for y'all.
You on the phone?
Who you calling?
Yeah.
I'm calling somebody that can help you spell these words.
Hold on, hold on.
I can't even pronounce it.
That's why I'm spelling this shit wrong, because it's hotter than the motherfucking hair. God damn.
I got this right here, though.
I promise you. I promise you, Chad.
I promise you, Chad. I promise you. I'm telling, Chad. I promise you, Chad. I promise you.
I'm telling you.
I'm telling you.
I work too hard.
I work too hard for this shit, man.
Nah.
Anybody want to help Ocho?
I got it.
I promise you.
What?
Oh, Kiara Skiro.
Kiara?
Kiara Skiro. Kiara? Kiara Skiro.
I used to
date a Kiara Skiro
in high school.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know, right now we're playing
Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?
You need to phone a friend.
Hold on, Kiara.
That's somebody's name.
That ain't the word.
What's the word you want me to speak of?
That's the word.
Kiara Skiro.
Hey, why would you give me
an Italian word and I'm black?
They got black Italians.
You eat spaghetti, right?
That count.
Hold on.
Kiara.
Kiara.
Okay.
Okay.
Boy, it's hot. Hey, boy, it's hot.
Shit. okay boy it's hot shit I'm sweating like a pig in a slaughterhouse
man
Chiara
yeah baby
I mean listen the only thing
only Italian I know how to spell is
Balotelli
Mario Balotelli
yeah but this ain't it Balotelli. Mario Balotelli.
Yeah.
But this ain't it.
You got his number.
You better call him.
Maybe he can help you spell the word.
The Italian language,
they spell a little different than the English
language.
So Chiara, I know it starts
with a K.
Because the Italian language,
Ki, Ki.
Right?
I.
Because Italians don't use the E that much.
Everything's with a goddamn I.
Everything's with a goddamn I for some reason.
So, K-I.
A.
Yeah.
Yeah. So, K-I-A-R-A.
C-H-I-A-R-O-S-C-U-R-O. Come on, man.
See?
See?
I wasn't
you come on
you got me at a disadvantage
now
listen
I went to Oregon State
went to Harvard and Yale
for two semesters
nothing
in that curriculum
yeah
was Italian
nothing
nothing
we didn't do anything Italian
so they give me an Italian word
to spell here on nightcap in front of the world.
Like, come on.
That's unfair.
You can't handicap me like that.
I promise you I got the next one.
But nothing Italian.
Give me something from the English language.
Okay.
Give me something from the English language.
Give him a word Ash
nah
you should have gave me like Volatelli or something
how about this here
man stop playing with your boy
man
stop playing
refrigerator
R-E-F
hold on refrigerator R-E-F Hold on.
Refrigerator. R-E-F
R-I-D-G-E
R-A-T-O-R
Refrigerator. That's what I
always sneak in. Yes, it is.
No.
R-E-F-I
G-E-R-A-T-O-R.
There's no D in refrigerator.
I spelled it right.
What you talking about?
No.
It's silent.
You had a D in front of the G.
No.
It ain't in there.
Ain't no D there?
You sure?
What? Hey, hold on. No. Hey, spell fridge. Ain't no D there? You sure? What? Hey, hold on.
Hey, spell bridge.
Yeah. You should have just said refrigerator.
How do you spell bridge?
Okay.
Spell fridge.
B-R-I-D-G-E.
Nah, man.
Y'all butchering the English language
I know what I'm doing
bridge and fridge is spelled the same way
once you add the R and the E
the D is there
that's what I'm talking about about the English language
they don't know what the fuck they doing
they didn't know when they made the shit
huh
you said you wanted a word from the English language
but I got it right
you said you wanted a word from the English language. Yeah, but I got it right. You said you wanted a word.
It's going to...
No, you...
It is.
You had a deal.
It depends what book you look at.
You look in the New Testament or the Old Testament.
Yeah.
Refrigerator ain't in neither one of them.
They have no refrigerator.
They have no refrigerator in neither one of them.
I'm talking about the Bible.
I'm talking about the dictionary.
In the old testament.
No, listen. I'm telling you, dictionary. The Old Testament for a refrigerator. In the dictionary. In the Old Testament. In the Old Testament.
No, listen.
I'm telling you, man.
My grandma.
My grandma wrote, man, in her dictionary.
In her Old Testament, refrigerator was spelled with a D.
In the New Testament, with the new kids, the D is out there.
Wow.
Yeah.
It's called.
You mean new edition?
You mean the new edition?
I just not called the Old Testament and the New Testament.
The first edition? You mean a new edition? The Old Testament and the New Testament. The first edition?
Nah, okay.
Refrigerator.
You say refrigerator.
Okay, Ocho didn't do too well tonight, y'all.
Y'all have to understand Ocho hasn't had his hat.
Ocho hadn't had his hat in a while.
So hopefully he brings his hat on the live tour.
So we get some of these words right.
Like I said, I've played a lot of international games.
I've been to Japan twice.
I've been to Barcelona.
I've been to Berlin.
We played in Australia.
We played in Australia. We played in Mexico.
I mean, we're in Japan.
It was just hot as hell.
Everybody love American money.
They bargain with you. You got American money.
You got American money?
Yeah, I got American money.
We make deal.
Alright. Let's make a deal. Let's make a deal. I'm money. We make deal. Alright.
Let's make a deal. Let's make a deal.
Let's make a deal. I'm here to make a deal.
Man, I got a whole bunch of...
Man, I bought that stuff back.
Man, that stuff don't work, man.
I mean, they had that... You know, Japan,
like, in the 90s, they had, like, the...
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hell yeah.
You know, the Waltmans and stuff like that.
Like, yeah, yeah. Just playing the CD to this. It stopped
working? Man, I got that thing back over here,
man.
I think it started working
on the plane. I think this is...
It might have started working as soon as I got it out of that damn
store. I don't know why you booing, Jack.
And I think, you know what?
I just remember, I think,
I remember going to McDonald's
and I think like a Big Mac, a's and I think, I think like a
Big Mac, a large fry and a Coke was like 15, like 15 bucks.
It was a brand, very expensive.
It was like almost basically triple the price of what you, yeah, what you would play in
the States.
But, uh, yeah, I mean, but, but you already know, it's not that the food is bad.
It's just that you're not used to eating the food.
So you're not used to eating the food. So you're not used to eating, yeah, things that you're not used to eating.
But pizza, pizza, Ash will be right at home.
We've never gone any place that Ash can't find something that she likes.
Oh, you don't like it?
Hell no!
Ash got a palate for everything.
Man, look here.
Whatever. Yeah, see, I'm not a picky eater. you don't like Italian
you like Indian food
you don't eat
is there anything that you don't eat
she think for a second
no not really
pickles oh yeah pickles whatever
something else you should be
pickles olives
salt and vinegar so that's it salt and vinegar chips Pickles. Oh yeah. Pickles, whatever. Something else you told me. Olives. Pickles. Olives.
Salt and vinegar.
So that's it. Salt and vinegar chips.
Pickles and olives.
Everything else is a buffet. I am one that will try anything one time. And there are three things
I will never eat. I will never eat
because I don't like the texture.
Okras, zucchini,
and squash.
Okras, zucchinis, and squash?
Oh, no. I don't like it either. Absolutely.
Not a chance in hell.
Mm-mm.
Nah.
No. Nah.
Nah, okay. I don't like none of that
either with you. I don't like none of that either.
There's a lot. I'm really,
I'm really, really picky. I mean, I've
always been picky. I've always been picky.
I've always been picky, but
I'm not the... I'm picky
when it comes to vegetables. I'll try a different type of...
I'll try meat. So if you say,
okay, Shannon, okay, this is a possum
or this is squirrel, this is armadillo,
this is... I'll try that.
Well, you talk about some
okra and Brussels sprouts and all
that, I'm good.
Man, I'm telling you Ocho
you get you a nice medium sized raccoon
cut bell pepper
cut some bell peppers up
some onion
put that aluminum foil
cut him up Ocho
and put his ass in that oven by 325
watch him fall off the bone
come on man watch him fall off the bone.
Come on, man. Ain't nobody eating a raccoon. Watch him fall off the bone, Ocho.
I guarantee you. I let my sister
cook that thing for you, Ocho.
I guarantee you people think somebody's slapping their fingers
the way your lips be popping.
I ain't eating no raccoon.
That ain't happening.
Huh?
But you eat booty. I don't actually eat it. But you eat booty I don't actually eat it
no I'm not
I'm not actually
you what they call
the Gen Z
Gen Z car you a eater
like you actually eating a raccoon
no you don't actually
you actually eating booty
like
they tongue up in there You actually eating booty. Like, just right there.
Tongue up in there.
Ugh.
Bruh!
You don't eat it, man.
You just right around the rim.
Like, you know when you shoot the basketball
and the basketball goes around the rim
before it go in,
that's it.
You just...
Yeah, yeah.
And guess what?
They go right into the hoop.
You're supposed to go in the hoop,
but it's better than eating raccoon.
Raccoons eat
everything out there. They scavengers.
They scavengers.
So do chickens. Nah,gers. So do chickens.
Nah, man.
So do pigs.
Hold on.
Chick, a pig eat its own.
There's nothing a pig will not eat.
You're talking about a guy that grew up on a farm.
Anybody that grew up on the farm in the south,
a pig and a chicken are the nastiest animal
you will ever meet.
The nastiest.
No, it's not. No no it's not no it's not
no sir
nah
listen
it is
it's nothing wrong
it's nothing wrong
with detailing your women
it's nothing wrong with detailing your women.
It's nothing wrong with detailing your woman.
Now, you stuck in the 80s and you haven't evolved when it comes to foreplay in that area.
Listen, no, no, no, no.
Because you refuse to suck on toes and you won't lick no ass.
You stuck in the 80s.
You have to evolve with the times.
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The podcast where I sit down with the boldest innovators
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In this episode, I'm joined by Anjali Sood,
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We dive into the competitive world of streaming, how she's turning so-called niche into mainstream gold, connecting audiences with stories that truly make them feel seen.
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In the fall of 1986, Ronald Reagan found himself at the center of a massive scandal that looked like it might bring down his presidency.
Did you make a mistake in sending arms to Tehran, sir?
No.
It became known as the Iran-Contra affair.
And I'm not taking any more questions in just a second. I'm going to ask Attorney General.
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In my podcast, Fiasco, Iran Contra,
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To hear the whole story, listen to Fiasco, Iran Contra on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee, your hands can't hit what your eyes can't see.
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The Bills, they do it right.
Yeah.
I played in Buffalo once.
Y'all played in Buffalo?
Eric Moles was there.
Eric Moles and Peerless Price was there.
And the second time I played there...
You okay?
I forgot who...
I think it might have been Stevie Johnson.
Stevie Johnson might have been there,
if I'm not mistaken.
And that play...
Did y'all go to Buffalo? Did y'all go to Toronto?
Did y'all go to Toronto?
I ain't going nowhere.
When I went on the road,
I grabbed my food.
I do my little dinner.
And I'm right back at the hotel
ready for team meeting.
Yeah, I ain't never do that.
I ain't going nowhere.
Me too.
That's when you learn like nah
I can't do this
it's nice
now hold on I play
remember I played with the Alouettes now one year in
Montreal I went to Toronto
and I
went to Toronto
and still
I know no I did the same thing well you should know what's up in there went to the hotel huh? We went to play Toronto. That's another side. And still, I know, no, I did the same thing.
Well, you should know what's up in here.
Went to the hotel, got me some McDonald's, went right back in.
They ain't do nothing.
Now, I hear stuff about Toronto.
I mean, you know better than me.
I see the look you gave me, so I'm assuming.
So is Toronto like Houston?
Is that what you're trying to tell me?
No, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on.
Don't do that now. You're saying something
very near to the bar.
I gotta pray, Lord.
I'm asking for forgiveness.
I'm just saying.
I saw the look you gave me.
You tilted down your glasses to let me know
like I write.
Toronto, Toronto, Toronto. So are we talking about coming to Houston? me know like I write Toronto
Toronto
Houston
that's what I'm trying to say
okay okay I'm just checking
no
no
no
hey but I tell you what
hey
back in the early 90s
Prince used to have a couple of clubs.
Glam, Slam, and I think First Avenue.
Prince, Prince. And he was in there.
And they were in there.
They were in there.
OJ was in there.
You bought it, bought it. I'm buying it.
Huh?
You know what I'm saying, Ocho?
Right, right.
I had to reprint.
I couldn't imagine
partying with Prince.
I know that's a time now, boy.
Yeah.
I wasn't partying with him,
but he was in there.
And you know, hey,
Ocho, there been some time.
I had hit that Jimmy Swagger.
Father, I've sinned.
You know what I'm saying? I had to ask
him for forgiveness.
Oh, Minnesota. Minnesota kept
one of the great
secrets. Minnesota?
Don't sleep on it.
Like that? Right.
Like you said, Ocho, I'm a Chinese man.
But boy, they had
six foot
come on now
like Jessica Rabbit
you know I was here on my foot
I was hot on the trail
you know what I'm saying
that wascally whabby
hold on
we got to lock back in lock back in hey hold on we got to lock back in
we got to lock back in
lock back in
lock back in
hey
hold on
they got the emoji
they got the feet emoji
that's feet?
yeah you see the thing
the feet
yeah they got the feet together
what
why they look red like that?
that's the soles of people's feet
your feet black
I mean what you been stepping on charcoal?
I mean, that's red, though.
Like, that looks completely red unless something's wrong with my screen.
I mean, see, your feet, you know, your feet, you got some ugly feet, though, Ojo, so.
Oh, no.
Listen, I get me a manicure pedicure Every Friday man ain't nothing wrong with these feet
I got pretty feet
Says who? Everybody
Says you
Yeah shoot my feet cool too
Hey don't put them feet in this camera man
Don't do that
Don't do that hey come on man
Come on man
Come on man come on come on man come on man why you trip you you tripping man
you good you good you good you see the toes on show no i ain't trying to see your toes man
i stopped right there i stepped on i jumped in the back of a pickup truck and jumped on the nail so
that's why i got that cut there
that's why i got that cut. That's why I got that cut
in the bottom of my foot.
I jumped in the back of a truck
and a piece of wood was sticking up
and had a nail in it.
And I was like,
Hey,
man,
you shot,
you shot at.
So you know what?
I'm going to get somebody
to get on my toe,
kiss my,
eat my,
suck my toes.
Yeah. I my feet. Suck my toes. Yeah.
I like that.
Yeah.
Look at that, Ocho.
Ocho, I ain't joining your club.
You a member of one.
No, no, listen.
It's a whole community of us.
It ain't no community, y'all.
You made that up.
Oh, it's a whole community of us. You community, y'all. You made that up. Oh, it's a whole community
of us. You know how I said the community
used to raise kids?
That community ain't raising me.
I'm boycotting.
You know what?
No child left behind.
You were the child we left behind.
Yeah, that's okay.
I ain't mad. I am not mad.
There's always time to catch up, though good I take your word for it Ocho
as you can see guys you know what
I prayed
that God give me patience
and
and he's trying he's
he's testing
me
the guy that's just getting it to your screen he's your favorite Tested me.
The guy that's just getting it to your screen,
he's your favorite number 85, the route runner extraordinaire, the bingo ring of fame honoree, the legendary, the pro bowler,
the all pro, Liberty City's own, that's Chad Ocho Seco Johnson.
Thank you for joining us.
We really greatly, greatly appreciate that.
Appreciate that. Appreciate that. Listen, I'm late.
I'm late again, but this time, this time I had to do number two.
I had to do number two. So I'm not sure.
I'm just trying to figure out, help me out with this.
For being a little late.
So right, like right before you had to come on, you know what?
I'm on. You didn't have to do it
10 minutes ago, 15 minutes ago,
even five minutes ago.
As soon as I get ready to hit this, they're counting us
down. You're like, hold on.
It wasn't me.
You said it wasn't me. Listen,
I understand the importance of the show.
I know where we're going. I know where we're headed.
We're going to be like the Temptations. And I know where we're going I know where we're headed we finna be like the temptations
and I know sometimes act like Eddie
but by a heartbeat
but you have to understand
when I sat down I had a little turtle head
yeah so
when you have a little turtle head
you know you can't
play with God's creation so I had to go
I had to get that out so I ain't do it all the way
I just went halfway so So I still got something.
I mean,
the people knew you was probably full of caca.
So they not surprised.
They,
they not surprised.
You only pinched half of it off.
Yeah.
My grandma.
Hey,
my grandma.
They not surprised you pinched half a loaf off.
You ain't get the whole loaf out.
Ocho.
Hell nah.
There's a girl that underwent plastic surgery
to make her
a virgin again
she wants to restart her body count
no
it don't work like that though
it don't work like that
yeah
so if I got a car right
and I got a car and I drive that thing
and put 20,000 miles on it right it like that. So if I got a car, right? And I got a car and I drive that thing and
put 20,000 miles on
it, right? And I go
to the tire shop and change
the motherfucking rims. Yeah.
Them miles still on there.
Regardless of the tune
up, regardless of the oil change,
regardless of the new set of tires, regardless
of what I do. Even I get a
tune up, the miles is still on there.
Now, I don't even know why she did that.
You know me.
I like my women seasoned.
I don't want you.
I want you with a little work done to you.
You hear me?
She done been raked across the coast.
Huh?
You got that?
Uh-uh.
What she tried to do
Ocho
people in the chat y'all know what I'm talking about
what she tried to do is that you put a bunch of miles
on your car and you turn the speedometer back
the odometer
bro even though you turn it back
you don't put 200,000 miles
that thing got more miles on a 70 pickup
you don't try to roll it back
that car still got two
I don't care if you roll it back to zero.
You got 200,000 miles
on your ass.
Yeah.
People need to stop.
Yeah.
Listen,
you do it.
Sometimes you make it big.
You got to lie in it.
There will always be someone that is willing.
There will always be a man that is willing.
Do we got a little grip too or no, Joe?
Because you're...
I mean, I can't put a
buy-in or sausage in a hoagie roll.
If I could work with it.
Yeah.
You probably couldn't. I'm assuming
she probably heard it from multiple people at that point where she can't even feel anything at that point.
So she felt the surgery.
Well, look here.
I'll tell you what, Ocho.
If I can put my hands in there and clap, she good.
I'll take her.
You know what I'm saying, Ocho?
I'll take her.
I'm just saying, Ocho.
I'll take her.
I'll take her.
That's good enough for me.
That's good.
That's enough grip for your boy.
That's it.
You're about to put my hand in.
Hold on.
Hold on.
You say if you could put your hand.
Like, think about that.
Chat.
If you could put your hands in there and clap.
You're going to tell me.
What am I supposed to do with this right here?
What am I supposed to do with this?
Hello, hello, hello.
Anybody home?
Hey, man, you reaching there?
You pulling that bracelet?
Somebody got a 1986 class ring in there?
Oh, no, I can't do nothing with that, don't you?
I can't do nothing with that, don't you? I can't do nothing with that, don't you?
No, no, no, I'm good.
No, baby, you good, you good.
1986.
Hold on, what year was the class ring?
Man, you find all kinds of things up in there, man.
Come on, now.
Nah, man, uh-uh. Uh-uh, dude, dude. Nah, man.
Uh-uh.
Uh-uh.
No, no.
Nah, she wanted to go.
I mean, you run into one like that a couple times, Ocho.
Yeah, no, no.
Let me get the ball. Let me get the ball.
Let me get the ball.
Let me get the ball.
Listen, I'm talking about.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm talking about way back.
I'm talking about way back.
I'm talking about way back.
I don't want to give myself trouble now, but I'm talking about way back. I'm talking about way back. I'm talking about way back. I don't want to get myself in trouble now, but I'm just saying way back.
No, Ocho.
I really shouldn't be talking about my past.
It wasn't wild.
You were running the one.
I'm coming.
You got to put this on you so you don't fall in.
You know what I'm saying?
Because if you fall after, you got to hold this right here, Ocho.
I ain't lying to you, Ocho.
I swear.
I ran into one like that right there, Ocho.
Had to put a board on me.
Yeah, Ocho.
Yeah. I ain't lying. Yeah, that right there, Ocho. Had to put a board on me. Yeah, Ocho, yeah.
Yeah, man.
Man, they wild out there,
now.
Oh, shoot.
Man.
But, hey.
All you got to do,
one of those sparks,
the red pill. Don't choose the of those sparks, the red pill.
Don't choose the blue one.
Choose the red one.
Yeah.
You right.
Damn, man.
Damn, that was good.
Damn.
Man, you.
I'm out of breath. A lot of times, we'll give up
on a woman
that has 80, 85%,
90% of what we want
only to be with somebody that has
10 to 20% of what we want.
You ever notice that, Ocho?
I'm done.
No, it ain't the time.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Hold on, Ocho, it ain't time.
Ocho, it ain't time.
Ocho, it ain't time. Come on. It ain't time. Ocho, it ain't time.
Come on.
It ain't time, Ocho.
It ain't time.
Do me a favor.
Do me a favor.
Listen, listen.
I don't ask you for much.
I don't ask you for much, but I need you to bring that back one more time.
I need you to bring that back one more time because I've...
Boy, I felt that, boy.
You don't see me teeing up?
Boy, that ain't funny, man.
Do me a favor.
I promise I ain't gonna cry.
I promise I ain't gonna cry, but bring that back one more time.
A lot of times,
men will leave a woman
that has 80 to
90% of what we want
only to go be with somebody
that has 10 to 20%.
You see that?
We'll get mad at the woman. She got
80 to 90% of what we want.
We get mad.
Here come
the 10 to 20. I need that.
I promise you ain't
crying. These are tears of joy.
I need to hear that, boy.
Hey.
Oh, shit.
Boy, that was a good one, boy.
It happened.
I've done it.
A lot of times, y'all, I don't tell you things that somebody told me.
I'm telling you what I know.
Because a man will get mad.
And I don't know if women do it. I can't speak because I
don't know. I don't know how you guys think.
But I'm just telling you how a man will think.
How I thought.
Man.
Hey, boy, that was a good one, boy.
It ain't even Sunday, but you're preaching, though.
Shit.
Got me crying.
Shit. Fuck. Wrong with me.
Okay, let me tighten up. Let's go.
Back to the show.
Yeah, the coochie cocktail.
Oh, you know who that is?
Who?
From Atlanta.
Coochie cocktail.
Hey.
Hey, coochie cocktail.
Hey, boo.
How are you?
Girl, I follow you.
I follow you too.
I was like, oh, this is nice.
I like this.
Bad coochie cocktail came on with it.
Come on, coochie cocktail.
I did.
Come on with it.
Take notes.
Take notes.
I flew.
I flew two hours because I was, I don't know, I'm a little nervous tonight.
Y'all, I never been to Dallas before, so I'm a little nervous.
I ain't going to lie to y'all.
But y'all, y'all flew kind of good, so I ain't mad.
I'll come back.
Okay, so my, I guess my sex turn next is, so she said a comment.
She was like, you know, daddy put me in my place.
So I'm not going to lie.
Giving head is an apology in my household.
Wow.
Wait, it's an apology?
Because I have to apologize a lot because I got a real bad mouth.
Oh, I like that.
I talk a lot of shit.
I got to apologize a lot. Wait, Gucci real bad mouth. Oh, I like that. I talk a lot of shit. I gotta apologize a lot.
Wait, Gucci Cocktail, wait, wait, wait.
I talk a lot of shit too, but I receive
the head.
See? I like that.
Damn, Ocho!
See?
So,
so because I have to suck dick a lot, because I do talk a lot of shit, I had to become creative with my dick sucking skills.
Wow.
So, I don't know if you guys know about sensory deprivation.
No.
So, it's basically, I only use this trick if I'm really in trouble.
Okay.
So I get them in the morning time because y'all know how the new morning time be.
Yeah.
Yeah, that ain't nothing like that morning wood.
Come on.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Time out, time out, time out, time out.
Exactly.
I'm a visual learner.
Is your partner here with you?
He is.
But it's not the morning time.
Oh, okay.
You're right.
You're right.
Go ahead.
Okay.
So what you do? So what you do? Okay, come on. He is, but it's not the morning time. Oh, okay. You're right. You're right. Go ahead. Okay.
So what you do?
So what you do?
Okay, come on. So I wake him up, and I don't know if I use some AirPods or something, and I type in wet mouth sounds.
Okay.
And then I cover his eyes.
Okay.
You know, so he can't hear, he can't see.
And while I'm giving him head, all he hear is the wet mouth sounds
while I'm going down on him.
And I do give a tantrum massage,
so sometimes I don't even have to put it in my mouth.
I can just massage the tip.
Oh, hold on.
I've been short-changed for a lot of years then.
How the hell...
Talk to me.
I'm 56, and all this stuff that I'm hearing for the first time.
I think, you know what?
Like technology, the women have evolved.
They done have.
That's what it is.
Because none of this is going on when I was a school.
I ain't never heard of them.
I ain't never heard no 69 and B's.
I'm still on that one.
I'm just trying.
I mean, I can just imagine.
I'm asleep and all I hear is.
Exactly.
That's crazy.
So I'm thinking, am I dreaming?
Right.
Is that me?
Right.
Because you can't hear it, so all you hear is just the...
Right.
And then, if you really want him to come, just massage the tip like this.
And then it's a wham, bam, thank you, ma'am, and now I'm forgiven.
I mean, she's not even.
Are you taking notes?
Sex.
Coach Cartel, if you don't mind me asking, how old are you?
I'm 27.
I need to find me a 27-year-old.
I'm shopping in the wrong aisle.
So thank you, thank you.
Thank you.
Yeah, coochie cocktails.
I like that.
I like that.
Thank you, thank you.
I know I ain't the only one.
I know I ain't been that sheltered.
Now, come on.
Ocho, you know about all this?
I ain't never heard none of this.
I'm still stuck on 69 with the Beads,
so I'm trying to figure out where the Beads go.
What you mean where the Beads go?
Yeah, where the Beads go.
In the book.
Not mine.
No, yours.
Oh, in hers.
Yes.
OK, OK.
OK.
OK, OK.
OK.
I like it.
This is amazing. The Volume. You will never be able to change or grow through the thing that you refuse to identify. The thing that you refuse to say, hey, this is my mountain.
This is the struggle.
I'm Michael Kassin, founder and CEO of 3C Ventures and your guide on good company.
The podcast where I sit down with the boldest innovators shaping what's next.
In this episode, I'm joined by Anjali Sood, CEO of 2B. The podcast where I sit down with the boldest innovators shaping what's next.
In this episode, I'm joined by Anjali Sood, CEO of Tubi.
We dive into the competitive world of streaming.
What others dismiss as niche, we embrace as core.
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And if you can find a way to curate and help the right person discover the right content,
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In the fall of 1986, Ronald Reagan found himself at the center of a massive scandal that looked
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It became known as the Iran-Contra affair.
The things that happened were so bizarre and insane, I can't begin to tell you.
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