On Purpose with Jay Shetty - 5 Stages of Coping With Change You Can’t Rush & Creating Opportunity In Adversity

Episode Date: May 8, 2020

Change is constant, so why is it we’re never taught how to navigate it? Jay Shetty shares that our ability to adapt is the key to handling change well. We crave certainty so much that we’d rather accept the familiar pain we’re going through than the unfamiliar pain of change. Today you'll learn Jay Shetty’s 5 stages of managing change so you can adapt and find opportunity through adversity. Change can cause us grief, but now you'll have the tools to manage it. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Therapy for Black Girls podcast is your space to explore mental health, personal development, and all of the small decisions we can make to become the best possible versions of ourselves. I'm your host, Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, a licensed psychologist in Atlanta, Georgia, and I can't wait for you to join the conversation every Wednesday. Listen to the Therapy for Black Girls podcast on the iHort Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Take good care.

Conquer your New Year's resolution to be more productive with the Before Breakfast Podcast. In each bite-sized daily episode, time management and productivity expert Laura Vandercam teaches you how to make the most of your time, both at work and at home. These are the practical suggestions you need to get more done with your day. Just as lifting weights keeps our bodies strong as we age, learning new skills is the mental equivalent of pumping iron. Listen to before breakfast on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. The world of chocolate has been turned upside down.

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Listen to the obsessions, wild chocolate. On the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. It's not possible to never feel anxiety. It is possible to feel anxiety less. It is not possible to never have an anxious thought, wanting something to be eternally absent from our life, for it to never happen, it won't happen. It's not possible. And at the same time, we do the opposite.

We want something to be eternally present. We say, I always want to be happy. You can be happy every day, but you won't be happy every moment of every day. That's also not possible. Hey, everyone. Welcome back to on purpose. The number one health podcast in the world, thanks to each and every single one of you. I want to say that I am so deeply grateful for the strength of this incredible community,

all the hard work that you're putting in, all the changes you're making in your life, I am amazed that you're staying committed to listening to this podcast and it means the world to me because it's so important to constantly refuel our minds, to inspire ourselves, to connect with life-changing thought. Because guess what, when we change our thoughts, we start to change how we feel. And so I'm so grateful that you're here again. And today's episode is another solo episode, where I'm going to give you some power tips on the five stages of managing change that you can't avoid and finding opportunity in adversity. I thought it was really important that we talk about how to manage change right now,

because change is something we all experience, change is something we're all going through right now and we don't realize that we've never been exposed to the skills or the talents on how to deal with it. Now Benjamin Franklin said it best. Change is the only constant in life. One's ability to adapt to those changes will determine your success in life. That statement literally, and encapsulates everything we need to know. Change is always going to be there. And sometimes it's more extreme like it is right now than at other times.

But listen to what he says carefully. One's ability to adapt to those changes will determine your success in life. Adapting is everything for us. And it's crazy because learning to deal with change and adapting is probably the most useful skill in the world, considering it that it's so constant. Changes are unavoidable.

Everyone has to experience it that it's so constant, change is unavoidable. Everyone has to experience it, and it's consistently experienced. But we're never trained in school or college or at work, how to deal with it. No one ever teaches you how to deal with change. And that's what I wanna share with you today, because you'll find when I start going through these tips and these ideas, there's a lot in there

that may actually surprise you on how to deal with change. Often we're told, like, just be positive, right? Like just think good things, just look for the good in everything. And, you know, that's not necessarily the best advice. And often it can actually be misleading, it can create more challenges than it creates solutions. And we actually end up feeling emptier because of it. So none of what I'm going to share with you today are just easy answers.

This is really doing the deep work, which I know all of you are ready for. Now, here's the thing. Change can often feel like pain. It can feel like grief and loss. Change can feel like pain. Change can feel like a lot more than change. Because it often feels like things are changing for the worse, right? We want things to change for the better. But when it feels like things are changing for the worse, that's when we feel pain. Now, Ticknot Han explained his best.

He said that we have this attachment to familiar pain. We keep going back to the same pain and we want the same pain because it gives certainty in our life. How crazy is that? That we crave certainty so much that we push ourselves towards familiar pain. We'd rather go through pain we're sure of than new pains, which he calls unfamiliar pains. It's crazy that we crave certainty so much

that we would rather accept familiar pain than the unfamiliar pain of change. So change feels like unfamiliar pain. It feels like you don't know what to expect. You don't know what's gonna happen. And you're like, well, I don't want that. I just rather have the pain of sitting in this same place every day and feeling the pain that I'm used to feeling.

And it's fascinating, right? When you think about it, you're like, you're like, what is wrong with me? Like, why would I do that to myself? But that's how badly we want certainty. That's how badly we want things to stay the same. So I was looking at this when I was reflecting on this and thinking about this podcast,

and I've been doing so many interviews recently on the today show and CNN, and we've done a ton of interviews right now to try and support and help with CNBC, with the Wii movement. It's been a really powerful time to try and get this message out there. When I was thinking about this podcast, I was looking at something called the Kubla Ross model, which talks about the five stages of grief. So here are the five stages of grief,

and I'm reading from a graphic that I found on Pinterest. And it says that these are the five stages of grief and what they really mean. So the first stage of grief is according to the Kubla Ross model is denial. Denial is a normal reaction to rationalize overwhelming emotions. It is a defense mechanism that buffers the immediate shock of loss. Now the reason why I'm talking about the grief model is because I feel like to some degree we're all going through some sort of grief or loss at the moment, right? We've all lost something. We may have lost time. We may have lost

money. We may have lost someone. And if you've lost someone or you're going to a really tough time Potentially about to lose someone. I just want to send you and them all my love and prayers and best wishes But others have lost different things. Maybe you lost or missed your graduation Maybe you missed a prom. Maybe you missed a promotion. Maybe you missed a vacation Maybe your weddings had to be postponed, maybe you lost a job, maybe you broke up with someone because of the challenge at this time. So it's interesting that we're all going through some sort of grief. And the five stages of grief as the Kubla Ross model talks about denial as the first step,

often we deny the loss and we act like, oh no, I haven't lost anything. I'm fine. Like I'm good, right? Don't worry about me. And we don't seek out help because we feel safer in the denial. Again, the familiar pain is Tick-N-Han says, the second stage of the Kubla Ross model is anger. And it's described here as the numbing effects of the denial stage of grief begins to wear off. The pain of loss starts to firmly take hold as we search for blame, feel intense guilt and lash out. So this is where we you know, start trying to find someone else who's responsible for the pain we reflect or deflect our pain onto someone else. Now the third stage of the Kubla Ross model is bargaining.

Now, the third stage of the Kubla Ross model is bargaining. Bargaining is the what if stage of grief and it serves an important purpose. It provides temporary escape from pain, provides hope, and gives a person time to adjust to the reality of the situation. That's that bargaining, what if this, what if that, and it gives us a temporary relief. Again, we're looking constantly for that numbing. It's fascinating that we've so not been trained to sit with our pain that we constantly try to numb everything, right?

And when people are trying to numb stuff, we turn to alcohol, we turn to addiction, we turn to overeating, we turn to video games. We numb ourselves in so many different ways from feeling pain because it feels easier. And so that's why we develop all these bad habits. And hey, if you've fallen into a bad habit right now or you're struggling with a bad habit right now, you've got to give yourself a break because it's natural when we're feeling pain that we try and numb ourselves from that pain. So that's bargaining. The fourth is depression in the Kruble Ross model. This type of depression

is not a sign of mental illness. It is the appropriate response to a great loss. You might experience intense sadness, decreased sleep, reduced appetite and loss of motivation or common. And the fifth and final stage is acceptance. Acceptance refers to accepting the reality of a loss. And the fact that nothing can change that reality. This does not mean that the person is okay with the loss. I've studied and read about the Kubla Ross model before and I was thinking a lot about it because I was thinking about the phases I was going through

during this time, you know, we've all been in lockdown for like six to eight weeks now. And I was thinking a lot about it because I was thinking about the phases I was going through during this time. We've all been in lockdown for like six to eight weeks now. I was thinking that so many people are going through phases and you can tell by the memes people post what phase they're in right now. It started off as complete panic and confusion and anxiety. Then it got to a point of onboard in the house and I'm in the house board. Then it got to a point of trying to help and and I'm in the house bored. And then it got to a point of trying to help and serve and make a difference.

So it's really interesting. So the reason I want to share this with you is, I think we're all getting a real powerful opportunity right now to build our muscle of dealing with change, right? Dealing with change is like a muscle in the body. The more you lift a weight of that muscle, the more likely it strengthens.

And so for so many of us, this is the first time that dealing with changes like hitting us in the face and we can't avoid it. We can't skip it. We can't pretend like it's not there. We can't just say, oh, okay, like I can just go out with my friends and I wouldn't have to worry about this anymore, right? How many of us have used busyness, used being productive, used being,

you know, just having a lot on as excuses for not really addressing what we're going through. And for the first time, it's hard to turn to any of those things. it's hard to turn to any of those things. Hi, I'm David Eagleman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on I Heart. I'm a neuroscientist and an author at Stanford University, and I've spent my career exploring the three-pound universe in our heads. On my new podcast, I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions,

so we can better understand our lives and our realities, like does time really run in slow motion when you're in a car accident? Or can we create new senses for humans? Or what does dreaming have to do with the rotation of the planet? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to Intercosmos with David Eagleman,

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, it's Debbie Brown, and my podcast deeply well is a soft place to land on your wellness journey. I hold conscious conversations with leaders and radical healers and wellness and mental health around topics that are meant to expand and support you on your journey. From guided meditations to deep conversations with some of the world's most gifted experts in self-care, trauma, psychology, spirituality, astrology, and even intimacy. Here's where you'll pick up the tools to live as your highest self. Make better choices,

heal, and have more joy. My work is rooted in advanced meditation, metaphysics, spiritual psychology, energy healing, and trauma-informed practices. I believe that the more we heal and grow within ourselves, the more we are able to bring our creativity to life. And live our purpose, which leads to community impact and higher consciousness for all beings. Deeply well with Debbie Brown is your soft place to land,

to work on yourself without judgment, to heal, to learn, to grow, to become who you deserve to be. Deeply well is available now on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Big love, namaste. Conquer your New Year's resolution

to be more productive with the Before Breakfast Podcast in each bite-sized daily episode. Time management and productivity expert, Laura Vandercam teaches you how to make the most of your time, both at work and at home. These are the practical suggestions you need to get more done with your day. Just as lifting weights keeps our bodies strong as we age, learning new skills is the mental equivalent of pumping iron. Listen to Before Breakfast on the I Heart Radio app or wherever you get your podcasts. You know, one of the biggest challenges that we're all experiencing right now is that

we feel bad for what we feel sad about, right? How many of you are going through that right now where you feel sad because you've lost something or there's something missing in your life. And then you feel bad because you're feeling sad for something that doesn't feel worthy of losing because someone else has lost so much more. And this is something that we all go through in life. So the example, let me just make it really simple

is that if someone's losing a family member and you've lost a vacation, you think you can't feel bad for losing that vacation. Or if someone's lost their family member and you may have lost your job, but you're like, oh, at least I'm still alive, at least my family still loves, so you feel bad for feeling bad, right?

You feel bad about the feeling sad about whatever you've lost. Now, the truth is that this is actually one of the biggest mistakes we make and change is that we belittle our pain, we shrink it, we make it feel insignificant. So sometimes that's a useful thing, but it's not useful when you just shove your feelings under the carpet, you hide them, the analogy I was giving to someone the other day is, you know, when someone's coming over to your home, you've got guests coming over, you've got friends coming over, and because you don't want to tidy up properly, you shove all your clothes,

all your snacks, whatever it is, you shove them into a wardrobe, hoping that no one's going to find it, and they won't see it, and they come over and they're like, oh, your place is so beautiful, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then, you know, in a few months time, you somehow open that shelf up again by mistake and everything falls on top of you. Our problems are kind of like that. We try and close away our problems into the closet of hiding things from ourselves

or brushing it under the carpet. And then one day, all of our problems cascade and fall onto us when we reopen that closet. So, you know, how many times are we going to keep doing this in our life? And I feel like right now, and it's not about the best time. It's a time when we don't really have a choice where we have to really address what's going on. So, I want to talk about these five stages of change that I was inspired by the Kublai

Ross model and the five stages of grief, but I saw these as being the personal development, personal growth way of dealing with chains that I want to share with you today. And these are the five stages that I'm sure you're going through. And as you're listening to me, I want you to pinpoint where you think you are. And remember, none of them is a good place to be or a bad place or a easy place or a hard place. I just want you to be honest with yourself about where you think you currently are. And none of them makes you better or worse, right?

Like I want you to recognize that. Like none of them makes you better or worse for where you are. It's just important if you know, we all know this, that when you figure out where you are, then you know where you wanna go and where you wanna be. So these are the five stages, and like I said, I don't want you to judge yourself for feel guilty. I want you to find yourself on the map,

and the reason I'm sharing this with you today is I'm giving you the map of change, because if you don't know where you are, how you gonna get to where you wanna get to, and that's really the issue, that when you're stuck in a zone, if you don't know where you are, how you gonna get to where you wanna get to. And that's really the issue that when you're stuck in a zone, like a lot of us are right now, when you feel stuck, when you feel lost, when you feel confused, it gets really, really tough,

like really tough to know where you're going next. And you kind of feel like there is no next. How many times have you ever felt that you're like, I've hit a wall, I'm at a dead end, it's blocked, it's not going anywhere, I don't know what I'm going to do, right? So this is what I'm giving you this. So the first stage, and this is, imagine the first time you heard about COVID and you realize that there might be a lockdown and you might not be able to see anyone. The first thing that we experience is anxiety, Right, how many of you hold your hand up right now,

not a way, how many of you felt anxiety, confusion, fear, and feeling stuck. I'm sure a lot of you felt that, I know I felt that. You just full mask confusion, like pandemic. I remember a lot of people saying the word pandemic, it's like, wow, this sounds crazy. I can't believe there's a pandemic. And then you go, wow, it's like, wow, this sounds crazy. I can't believe there's a pandemic. And then you go, wow, it's affecting the whole world

for the first time. And you're just getting anxious. You're getting tons of alerts, you're getting tons of news, you're getting tons of chats and conversations and all the rest of it. And all of a sudden, you're just completely anxious. So anxiety is a very common thing to feel at the beginning of change. Now one of the

biggest things that we do with anxieties, we almost feel surprised by it. We're like, oh no, why am I feeling so anxious? Why am I feeling so nervous? Why am I confused? It's like, well, wait a minute. If someone just told you news that you weren't expecting, it's natural to feel anxious. I want you to realize this. We get surprised by anxiety and we start getting worried that we're anxious. But actually what's happened is that anxiety is something that we should expect because any time something new happens, you're naturally going to feel anxious. And anxiety is a natural and normal feeling. It's when we demonize it. We get scared of it. And this was one of the most beautiful teachings

I learned as a monk, that monks never demonize or glorify anything. We neutralize it. So when you hear about anxiety, if you demonize anxiety, it's like, oh no, anxiety is the worst thing that could happen to me. It's gonna happen to you again at some point, when it happens to you, like, oh my God,

this is the worst thing that's happening to me, right? gonna happen to you again at some point when it happens to you, like, oh my God, this is the worst thing that's happening to me, right? You associate that demonized version of it. Now, obviously, we know glorified anxiety, but a glorified version is like, oh my God, anxiety's the best thing in the world. It's amazing. That's also not true, right?

We don't want anxiety all the time. We don't want to feel constantly anxious. So neutralizing it means I expect it to happen, and I'm learning to develop the tools and the practices that help me manage it and navigate it rather than expect it never to happen. We want to lighten our life to be eternally present or eternally absent.

So what I mean by that is often we say like, I never want to feel anxious again. News update, not possible. Just not possible. It's not possible to never feel anxiety. It is possible to feel anxiety less. It is possible to feel anxiety for less time. It is not possible to never have an anxious thought, right?

So wanting something to be eternally absent from our life, for it to never happen, it won't happen. It's not possible. And at the same time, we do the opposite. We want something to be eternally absent from our life for it to never happen. It won't happen. It's not possible. And at the same time, we do the opposite. We want something to be eternally present. We say, I always want to be happy. I want to be happy every single day. You can be happy every day, but you won't be happy every moment of every day.

That's also not possible. And so these false expectations in our minds and our lives, create anxiety. And so I really want you to think about what's creating your anxiety and how the more we learn to accept it and normalize it and neutralize it, the easier it begins to deal with. Now the second thing that we all experience, which I think most of us experience in different ways, is anger. Now, anger doesn't mean you're shouting and screaming and being loud, it can mean that.

But anger also means like an internal feeling of like bitterness and just feeling upset and angry at the world and angry at yourself and angry at what's going on and not being productive. So anger can also be inward. It doesn't always have to be outward. And I think a lot of us experience inward anger more than we experience outward anger. And again, this is the frustration,

the pain, the disappointment with ourselves are the situation where angry at governments, where angry at the world, where angry at the news, we're just angry. And again, this is something that we have to experience. It's something we have to feel. It's not abnormal. What we have to try and do with our emotions is to feel them for less time and give them less energy, but it doesn't mean we don't have to feel them. And so maybe many of you went through anger. Again, figure out where you are on the

journey. Now, the third statement or the third place is acceptance. Right, so you can see some of these are there in the Kubla Ross model, although I mean different things. For me, it's also accepting in the same way, is that you accept what's going on. You're like, okay, I get it. The quarantine's a real thing, lockdown's a real thing, COVID's a real thing, this is all real,

it's not going away, but that has been, I'm happy about it. It just means that I accept that it's there, it all real, it's not going away. But that has been I'm happy about it. It just means that I accept that it's there, it's real and I have to deal with the fact that it's now happening, right? It's getting to grips. Now, getting to acceptance as quick as you can is a beautiful thing when it's real. Like you want to get to acceptance very beautifully and naturally and get to a point where you just are able to say, yes, I've found it. Yes, I'm here. Yes, I'm there. But it needs to be real. And sometimes we rush the process of getting to acceptance because we think we have to be

there. And I don't want you to be at acceptance because you feel you have to be there. I want you to be at acceptance because you really are there. Right? When you feel you have to be there, I want you to be at acceptance because you really are there. Right? When you feel you have to be somewhere, you're not really there. You know what I mean? Like, even when someone says you have to be at a party, you're not really there. That's kind of like getting to acceptance. It's like, I want you to be there because you want to be there. I don't want you to be there because you think you have to be there. You really think about that with acceptance. Really think about that with acceptance. And acceptance again is not a permanent state. So you may get to acceptance in a day and then you may feel in anxiety again the next day. That's fine, but acceptance is a growing state.

Again, it's not permanent. Anything when we're looking for permanent, there's nothing that has that permanent fixture for us when it comes to our emotions. And that should them worry us, it should save us from the false expectation. I'm Dr. Romani and I am back with season two of my podcast Navigating Narcissism. Narcissists are everywhere and their toxic behavior in words can cause serious harm to your mental health. In our first season, we heard from Eileen Charlotte, who was love bomb by the Tinder swindler. The worst part is that he can only be guilty for stealing

the money from me, but he cannot be guilty for the mental part he did. And that's even way worse than the money he took. But I am here to help. As a licensed psychologist and survivor of narcissistic abuse myself, I know how to identify the narcissists in your life. Each week, you will hear stories from survivors who have navigated through toxic relationships, gaslighting, love bombing,

and the process of their healing from these relationships. Listen to navigating narcissism on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Eva Longoria. I'm Maite Gomez-Rajón. We're so excited to introduce you to our new podcast. Hungry for history. On every episode, we're exploring some of our favorite dishes,

ingredients, beverages from our Mexican culture. We'll share personal memories and family stories, decode culinary customs, and even provide a recipe or two for you to try at home. Corner flower. Both. Oh, you can't decide. I can't decide. I love both. You know, I'm a flower tortilla flower.

Your team flower? I'm team flower. I need a shirt. flower. Your team flower? I'm team flower. I need a shirt. Team flower, team core. Join us as we explore surprising and lesser known corners of Latinx culinary history and traditions. I mean, these are these legends, right?

Apparently, this guy Juan Mendes, he was making these tacos wrapped in these huge tortilla to keep it warm. And he was transporting them in a burro hence the name The Burritos. Listen to Hungary for history with Ivalangoria and Maite Gomez-Réjon as part of the Micoltura Podcast Network available on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. A good way to learn about a place is to talk to the people that live there.

There's just this sexy vibe and Montreal, this pulse, this energy. Boizman is seen as a very snotty city. People call it Bozangilus. New Orleans is a town that never forgets its pay. A great way to get to know a place is to get invited to a dinner party. Hi, I'm Brendan Francis Newdum and not lost as my new travel podcast where a friend and I go places, see the sights, and try to finagle our way into a dinner party. We're kinda trying to get invited to a dinner party. It doesn't always work out.

I would love that, but I have like a Cholala who is aggressive towards strangers. I love the dogs. We learn about the places we're visiting, yes. But we also learn about ourselves. I don't spend as much time thinking about how I'm gonna die alone when I'm traveling. But I get to travel with someone I love. Oh, see, I love you too. And also, we get to eat as much time thinking about how I'm gonna die alone when I'm traveling. But I get to travel with someone I love.

Oh, see, I love you too. And also, we get to eat as much... I'm very sincere. I love you too. My life's a lot of therapy goes behind that. You're so white, I love it. Listen to Not Lost on the iHeart Radio app or wherever you get your podcasts. The fourth stage is adjusting and adapting.

Now, this is where you should be spending most of your time and where you want to be, where you're experimenting with morning routines, you're experimenting with trying out new workouts, you're experimenting with trying to find your feet, and adjusting and adapting is something we find unnerving, but actually we can find very exciting, because you're constantly trying to find out

how to make this work and how it fits. And so I feel like anxiety was with me for about three days. For me, when I first heard about all of this, I was anxious about how we would affect things and trying to figure it out. Anger, I've worked on feeling less and less in life, but definitely can go inwards to be aware of it. Acceptance, I've trained myself through this process to get there quicker. Adjusting and adapting took the longest period for me. So I feel like I was adjusting and adapting for a good three weeks. For three weeks, I didn't know what kind of routine I wanted, how I wanted to focus. And I found that having a morning routine, having that certainty in your day is what creates

adjusting and adapting easy. So when you're doing the adjusting and adapting mode, what you want to do to get there is you want to create a stake in the ground. One landmark thing that you do every day, one landmark thing you do in the morning and in the evening, one flagship thing. And that really allows that to become easier. So in the anxiety phase, what you want to do is you want to seek facts. When we're anxious, you want to research and seek facts. You want to focus away from fiction, focus away from opinion, you want to focus on facts. And that's what we don't do in anxiety and anxiety.

It's very natural to go with opinions. It's very natural to get lost in ideas, but actually in anxiety, what you want is facts. That's how you solve anxiety and change. You move towards facts. Now, when you're feeling anger, what do you do in anger? In anger, you journal, you allow yourself to feel that pain, but you try and direct it towards what's actually stopping you, which will come back to yourself.

You want to not direct anger towards yourself, but you want to direct that reflection. So anger requires reflection and introspection. Inacceptance to get there, what you wanna do is you want to start creating a real viewpoint now of where you think they're heading and adjusting and adapting. You wanna spend experimenting and exploring. And the fifth and final step I call is action. This is when you finally get into a groove and you create a plan and you start

moving and making a difference in your life and the lives of others. So the five stages of managing any change are anxiety, anger, acceptance, adjusting and adapting and action. And guess what's it's a cycle. You are going to go through all of the multiple times, do not expect to get to action and then not fall back into anxiety later that week. And that shouldn't discourage you. It should make you feel like you have a real plan. If you know that it's going to happen, it's like you have to work out every day. You know that you don't get to a particular type of body or mind and then it just stays the same, right? It doesn't work like that. And what I've been blown away by right now is the best of humanity, like, you know, the people that have not stopped living because of the virus.

And that's really the key to managing change is that you find a new way to live and you find a new way to fall in love with your life. And when I've seen people, I've seen people like getting married on Zoom. I've seen a person who was disinfecting all of their FedEx packages when they delivered them. I've seen someone who was in a church just with their partner and they put pictures of all of their family members around them and got married. I mean, I've seen incredible things and it fills me with so much joy and hope that people find ways to manage change. And therefore, one of the best ways to manage change is affection, giving affection to others.

It lets you feel like you have a role. When you feel you're part of the solution, it makes you feel like the problem is getting smaller and smaller. When you're not a part of the solution, the problem feels like it's getting bigger and bigger and bigger. So I really hope that you applied this to right now. I hope you applied to any change in your life. Share this with your friends.

Put this on your Instagram stories on Twitter, on Facebook, on YouTube. Tell me what's resonating with you. Tell me what's connected with you. I can't wait to see what you see. It's always, always fascinating for me to come across what stands out to you and what makes a difference to you. Now, I want to read some of your incredible reviews that you've left on the podcast. And this was for the Kunal Naya podcast from Jen in Boston, I believe. I've listened

in many episodes, however, I think this is by far my favorite episode. I fell in love with Kunal's wisdom and insight. Okay, this is great. I'm reading another one from Jesse 0305. Hands down the most genuine person in content. I've come across and I listen to all the greats. He is such a profound experience and he has a way of broaching challenging topics with no judgment and sound advice tangible knowledge and beautiful soul. You will not regret listening to a single episode. Thank you so much for this beautiful reviews. It means so much to me if you go to the podcast app and leave a review and share them on your stories. Tag me in and I will try and repost some of them as well. Thank you so much for listening today. Share this episode. Appreciate you so

much. Take care and see you next week. The one you feed explores how to build a fulfilling life admits the challenges we face. We share manageable steps to living with more joy and less fear through guidance on emotional resilience, transformational habits, and personal growth. I'm your host, Eric Zimmer, and I speak with experts ranging from psychologists to spiritual teachers, offering powerful lessons to apply daily. Create the life you want now. Listen to the one you feed on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Getting better with money is a great goal for 2023, but how are you going to make it happen? Ordering a book that lingers on your nightstand isn't going to do the trick. Instead, check out our podcast, How To Money. That's right,

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