On Purpose with Jay Shetty - 5 Strategies For Calming Anxiety & How To End The Stigma Around Mental Health
Episode Date: November 27, 2020Sid Malhotra learned from a young age not to share his feelings. Growing up in New Delhi, he watched as people in his family and community bottled up their emotions and figured he should do the same. ...In this episode of On Purpose, well-known Indian Actor Sid Malhotra and Jay Shetty talk about how to end the stigma around mental health that is so apparent in many cultures, specifically the South Asian culture Sid grew up in. They break down five strategies for learning to talk about your mental health challenges openly and in turn manage the anxiety that comes with them.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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                                         I am Dr. Romani and I am back with season two of my podcast, Navigating Narcissism.
                                         
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                                         Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose, the number one health and wellness podcast in the world thanks to each and every one of you.
                                         
                                         Today's episode is from a conversation between me and Sid Malotra.
                                         
                                         Sid is an accomplished Indian actor if you haven't seen his work, make sure you check it
                                         
                                         out.
                                         
                                         Today our conversation is about the cultural bias that is resistant to talking about mental
                                         
                                         health openly, specifically in the
                                         
    
                                         South Asian community, but in many across the world, maybe you can relay. For many
                                         
                                         communities, supportive frameworks for mental health is deeply stigmatized. My
                                         
                                         conversation with Sid will lay bare some strategies that he has employed with his
                                         
                                         loved ones that will inspire those of you who may be struggling with cultural
                                         
                                         stigma around mental health.
                                         
                                         Sid and I had this conversation over Instagram live a few weeks back during my mental health day series.
                                         
                                         And I'm really excited to share this conversation with you today on On Purpose.
                                         
                                         Share what you learn from it or any questions that come up for you and tag Sid and I on Instagram.
                                         
    
                                         Sid, how's it going?
                                         
                                         It's so good to see you man. Thank you so much for doing this. And I said how are you doing today? Sid and I on Instagram. Sid, how's it going?
                                         
                                         It's so good to see you, man.
                                         
                                         Thank you so much for doing this.
                                         
                                         And I said how are you doing today?
                                         
                                         I'm good, man.
                                         
                                         I'm really excited to be here, to use our platform for something which is positive and happy.
                                         
                                         It's what I'm happy to be part of.
                                         
    
                                         And learn something, say something, and let's hopefully people see some sense of positivity
                                         
                                         and happiness
                                         
                                         in their day. Absolutely. I want to take a moment to credit Sid because we connected recently
                                         
                                         on Instagram and then we were talking on WhatsApp and he just when he reached out, he's just saying,
                                         
                                         Jay, you know what? I just want to do something good with my platform. I want to help people.
                                         
                                         And I really acknowledge you for that Sid. It's It's truly special. I mean, your man in need is no introduction.
                                         
                                         Your incredible actor, fashion guru as well.
                                         
                                         But you know, to want to do good in the world,
                                         
    
                                         which is what your heart really is in the conversations we had.
                                         
                                         And I think that's really special, man.
                                         
                                         So I appreciate you deeply.
                                         
                                         No, I'm a great admirer of all the words
                                         
                                         that you say on social media to help people.
                                         
                                         And that's how I was thinking
                                         
                                         all throughout this lockdown in India
                                         
                                         that it's great we have this platform.
                                         
    
                                         Even you have a great massive voice today.
                                         
                                         I have it all thanks to the work over the years.
                                         
                                         So I feel it's somewhat our duty to kind of,
                                         
                                         at least have an attempt to give
                                         
                                         something positive.
                                         
                                         Especially in today's day and age, my today and today hate is selling so much and no one's
                                         
                                         spared.
                                         
                                         I remember you and I talking about it, like even you get stuff, which is the, I mean,
                                         
    
                                         actors for sure.
                                         
                                         I think we have far more easy target and being criticized is a part of our job at times.
                                         
                                         Like of course, some people like some things and people don't.
                                         
                                         But when they get personal or when it's become a trend to say use your anonymity on being
                                         
                                         anonymous on social media, I just say anything on the comment section.
                                         
                                         It's just, it's sad. I think here's my attempt with
                                         
                                         so much of yours to give something out positive on this universe of social media.
                                         
                                         Yeah, I love that man. Everything you've just shared so far has already been so insightful.
                                         
    
                                         Tell us about, I know there's one topic we really wanted to dive in together and I think it's
                                         
                                         really important that we dive into it together. You know, you're born and raised in India, you work in India primarily.
                                         
                                         I'm born and raised in London.
                                         
                                         You know, for both of us, being in the South Asian community,
                                         
                                         we were talking a lot about how the South Asian community struggles
                                         
                                         sometimes we're talking about mental health.
                                         
                                         And I hear that too, whether it's in comments or people who message me on, you know, DM or whatever it may be.
                                         
                                         And it's tough in the South Asian community to talk about mental health, because often we expect ourselves in each other to have it all together and kind of have a perfect life.
                                         
    
                                         Tell us about some of the things you've noticed or observed in that area.
                                         
                                         And you think would be useful to people listening today. life. Tell us about some of the things you've noticed or observed in that area and that
                                         
                                         you think would be useful to people listening today.
                                         
                                         Well, I grew up in middle class Punjabi household in New Delhi, which is the northern part
                                         
                                         of India. And there I feel we, anyway, struggle with communicating, especially men, I would say, especially with our fathers.
                                         
                                         As I grew up, there is a kind of stigma to not talk about if they're not feeling well or they're
                                         
                                         stressed about something. They feel it's a sign of weakness to talk about it. And I think
                                         
                                         to talk about it and I think it festers from us just putting so much pressure on our kids in our lives. We feel like oh my god, as soon as the child is born, we need to do something which is useful.
                                         
    
                                         Everything has to go to a direction of either making a lot of money or getting married, whether
                                         
                                         you're a man or a woman. And you have no other space to be weak, you have no space to be, to be,
                                         
                                         you know, saying that I'm not feeling up and about today, why I come on, go to school
                                         
                                         or go to your college. So I grew up in a house or just like that would be me and my brother.
                                         
                                         And it took me, I think in my mid 20s when I did come to Bombay when I was 21-22,
                                         
                                         I think in my mid 20s when I did come to Bombay when I was 21-22 to actually tell my dad, like, you know, we kept having conversation for the first six, eight months. And we
                                         
                                         always ended up just a simple buy, very, very courteous, but and after a year I started really
                                         
                                         missing family and, you know, you're by yourself. And I told my dad, I said, okay, okay, I'd love you, bye.
                                         
    
                                         And it was just silence and he just kept the phone down.
                                         
                                         He was just off.
                                         
                                         And I said, come on, I said, it's normal
                                         
                                         than I had to go to Delhi next time
                                         
                                         and make him sit down on that sofa
                                         
                                         and have a chat with him about, why do we not say,
                                         
                                         I love you to each other in the end, you know,
                                         
                                         whether it's you and mom I mean you
                                         
    
                                         and I realized that it's just culturally well lacking a sense of training or like we don't nobody start us when you were growing up nobody start us to to talk about our issues
                                         
                                         because it's considered weak and which is completely wrong because as soon as I got out, I realized what real life really hits you like, you know, I didn't know anybody in Bombay, you know, I was lucky enough to meet friends who let me stay at their houses.
                                         
                                         You know, we were barely making enough even feel it should happen in schools then.
                                         
                                         But I mean, that's a separate together, but it's it's it has to break ideas. I think conversations like these or people now talking about it far more openly in today's
                                         
                                         day is changing. I don't have anybody while growing up, we don't have social media. I mean,
                                         
                                         you are almost the same generation. And I wish I had books or I had knowledge or I had
                                         
                                         YouTube at that time to say here your talks. I feel today, I'm more at ease talking about anxiety,
                                         
                                         which we are the most volatile profession in the world,
                                         
    
                                         being an actor in any field on stage or in movies
                                         
                                         or on television is never constant.
                                         
                                         It's there's always so many ups and downs.
                                         
                                         And sometimes people think that we have it all
                                         
                                         and we have it easy.
                                         
                                         But I've lived most of my life not being an actor,
                                         
                                         at least for the first 26, 27 years.
                                         
                                         And now I've lived for the past few years.
                                         
    
                                         It's only today, it's been eight years almost
                                         
                                         by tomorrow that I became an actor.
                                         
                                         So congratulations, man.
                                         
                                         This is the latest.
                                         
                                         So, it's only been eight years.
                                         
                                         And I feel that's what I feel.
                                         
                                         I think there is so much to talk about in terms of handling anxiety.
                                         
                                         I think we need to know that it happens to everyone.
                                         
    
                                         I think anyone's who's saying he's never felt anxious or felt low.
                                         
                                         They're just blind to themselves and to others and they're just pretending and it's sad because they feel they can't talk to other people.
                                         
                                         I think one needs to change that.
                                         
                                         But I felt especially like one of your, I think chats, which was talking about like if you're wearing
                                         
                                         somebody else's clothes, if you're living somebody else's life, it's difficult. It's
                                         
                                         claustrophobic. And I think that's what I see my friends and family sometimes going through
                                         
                                         in other parts of society, or even say us, but say actors, we have to put up a persona at times
                                         
                                         and it can get exhausting.
                                         
    
                                         And it kind of took me this many years to realize
                                         
                                         to it's okay to not be in a great mood all the time.
                                         
                                         I'm not saying we outright rude,
                                         
                                         but I need to take that half-an-hour
                                         
                                         and contemplate before I go and meet people, or it's when I'm shooting, or it's when I have to deal
                                         
                                         with something that's not gone my way. So I feel, especially being an actor, it's about, you know,
                                         
                                         dealing with failures, it's still working after, you know, seeing failures, it's about dealing with failures. It's still working after seeing failures.
                                         
                                         It's a lot to do with failures.
                                         
    
                                         It's not hardly in any actor's lifetime
                                         
                                         that they would say that they've always had it
                                         
                                         their way, everybody has faces.
                                         
                                         So I think that's where my expertise would come in today.
                                         
                                         It's just to tell people that it's not alone,
                                         
                                         and everyone has their days.
                                         
                                         And failure doesn't, it's never the end of the world.
                                         
                                         I don't think anyone's very few unlucky ones
                                         
    
                                         really have to go through those situations
                                         
                                         that one act or that one particular day
                                         
                                         would define the rest of their lives.
                                         
                                         I think we put too much pressure on ourselves.
                                         
                                         And we need to start taking our kids to deal with emotions
                                         
                                         and talk about things as opposed to always telling them
                                         
                                         that don't talk about it, it's weak.
                                         
                                         You just have to concentrate.
                                         
    
                                         That's amazing, man.
                                         
                                         What an amazing message everyone is listening
                                         
                                         and watching.
                                         
                                         I hope you're
                                         
                                         allowing these incredible insights and just quite frankly just the vulnerability that's sit sharing with. Just allowing it in because I think the overall message that I'm hearing from
                                         
                                         Sid is that there's no one in the world who doesn't experience anxiety, who doesn't experience a low-day, no matter how much money you have or fame you have or follow as you have or whatever any of that stuff we all to that next stage, when I get that award,
                                         
                                         when I get that job, when I get that promotion, then somehow this will all disappear.
                                         
                                         But that's not true. Everyone at all stages in their career and their relationships will experience
                                         
    
                                         this. And therefore, we have to get more comfortable with talking about it, with experiencing it,
                                         
                                         because it's not going to just disappear
                                         
                                         or not going to go away.
                                         
                                         And what Sid said very beautifully is that it's okay, it's okay that not every day you're
                                         
                                         having the best day of your life.
                                         
                                         I actually felt more anxious after becoming an actor.
                                         
                                         I think maybe because I had no reference point of reference as to what a struggling actor
                                         
                                         needs to do or doesn't need to do then I got into assistant direction. So even even a small little job or an act film or a shoot
                                         
    
                                         used to used to give me that high for the rest of the month. I rent and I've made salary
                                         
                                         over I'm assisting on a film now where I get to learn so much.
                                         
                                         Oddly after when I became an actor is all these things that are stemming in because I wasn't trained for it
                                         
                                         I don't come from a family where anyone's been this in limelight and a known face
                                         
                                         so when people say oh my god he's successful and
                                         
                                         You know so everything must be sorted what do you have you have money you have fame and you know you're working every day that
                                         
                                         have, you have money, you have fame, and you know, you're working every day, those are just, I mean, those are something they have nothing to do with, say, mental health.
                                         
                                         We have a different, everybody has their levels of, you know, judging certain situations.
                                         
    
                                         In the 1680s, a feisty opera singer burned down a nunnery and stole away with her secret lover.
                                         
                                         a feisty oppressing or burned down an unnery and stole away with her secret lover. In 1810, a pirate queen negotiated her cruiseway to total freedom, with all their loot.
                                         
                                         During World War II, a flirtatious gambling double agent helped keep D-Day a secret from the Germans.
                                         
                                         What do these stories have in common?
                                         
                                         They're all about real women who were left out of your history books.
                                         
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                                         We learn about the places we're visiting, yes,
                                         
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                                         but I get to travel with someone I love.
                                         
                                         Oh, see, I love you too.
                                         
                                         And also, we get to eat as much...
                                         
                                         Every sincere I love you too.
                                         
    
                                         My life's a lot of therapy goes behind that.
                                         
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                                         I'm Mungaisha Tikular, and to be honest,
                                         
                                         I don't believe in astrology,
                                         
                                         but from the moment I was born, it's been a part of my life.
                                         
                                         In India it's like smoking you might not smoke but you're gonna get secondhand astrology.
                                         
    
                                         And lately I've been wondering if the universe has been trying to tell me to stop running and pay attention
                                         
                                         because maybe there is magic in the stars if you're willing to look for it.
                                         
                                         So I rounded up some friends and we dove in and let me tell you,
                                         
                                         it got weird fast. Tantric curses, majorly baseball teens, cancelled marriages, K-pop,
                                         
                                         but just when I thought I had a handle on this sweet and curious show about astrology,
                                         
                                         my whole world came crashing down. Situation doesn't look good. There is risk to father.
                                         
                                         Am I whole view on astrology?
                                         
                                         It changed.
                                         
    
                                         Whether you're a skeptic or a believer,
                                         
                                         I think your ideas are going to change too.
                                         
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                                         If you had to give a younger me advice, for example,
                                         
                                         if I came to you like, say 10 years ago, I was like,
                                         
                                         Jay, I'm a struggling actor.
                                         
                                         I am in my mid 20s.
                                         
    
                                         And I don't know when my future lies.
                                         
                                         My family can't provide me all the financial security. Do I need to have a deadline that I spend
                                         
                                         to achieve my passion or is it something I can do to just be more at present and not live in
                                         
                                         this nature? What would you say to kids like me who want to be actors or in any greater field?
                                         
                                         to kids like me who want to be actors or in any creative field.
                                         
                                         Yeah, absolutely. That's a great question. I think the first thing I'd say is that
                                         
                                         the understanding of living your purpose has as three elements to it. So passion is one of the three. It's passion, strengths and passion. So if you really want to live a effective purpose for life, you
                                         
                                         have to find something that has the synergy between these three. So if you take someone
                                         
    
                                         like you, you're passionate about acting, you've worked on developing the strengths and
                                         
                                         the skills to actually be a good actor. And you do it because you want to make other people
                                         
                                         happy. You have, you talked to me about that previously where you have a desire that work has a positive impact on people. So when people are chasing their passion,
                                         
                                         the question I often ask people is, are you also interested in chasing your skills and strengths
                                         
                                         that are needed to make that passion a reality? Because if you're not willing to do that work and
                                         
                                         that sacrifice, then it's probably a better idea that you choose something else.
                                         
                                         And so having that very real honest look at yourself and saying, am I really so passionate about this, that I'm willing to work and train and develop and go through those tough times with no money and less support and less stability. And you have to be okay with that in your mind first
                                         
                                         before you experience it.
                                         
    
                                         At the same time, what I would suggest
                                         
                                         to a lot of young people is that now's the time
                                         
                                         to invest in your mental health.
                                         
                                         Don't wait till something goes wrong
                                         
                                         or something bad happens in your family or in your life
                                         
                                         before you start to switch to it.
                                         
                                         So ask yourself right now,
                                         
                                         are you taking care of your mental health? are you taking care of your mental health?
                                         
    
                                         Are you taking care of your physical health?
                                         
                                         Are you really allowing yourself to be in a position that flourishing boom?
                                         
                                         Or actually, are you putting yourself in a very vulnerable position where your mental
                                         
                                         health can be affected?
                                         
                                         So I would say that chasing your passion and taking care of your mental health can go
                                         
                                         hand in hand.
                                         
                                         And if they do go hand in hand, you're more likely to last the test of time.
                                         
                                         What would you have liked to hear? I want to hear that. What was the advice that you would have liked to
                                         
    
                                         have here at that time? No, firstly, absolutely. I think to spend a number of hours in working on
                                         
                                         the craft, on the skill, whether you want to be an athlete, whether you want to be an actor, a singer,
                                         
                                         if you're willing to spend that many hours working on the craft, I think that's
                                         
                                         that is more important than waiting for that one break, because I remember I went into
                                         
                                         say a system direction behind the camera because I had no clue what a film set was like,
                                         
                                         and I was lucky enough to be
                                         
                                         you know on a massive film called My Name Is Khan with the best people in the business
                                         
                                         and just be giving clap and working and that took about a year and a half of my life and I
                                         
    
                                         actually loved the process so it kind of also connects you with your passion.
                                         
                                         So as I said, only at that time, I was on a high.
                                         
                                         I was on a set where Shah Rukh Khan and Karjol are performing.
                                         
                                         And I get to be an AD.
                                         
                                         It's only when one gets that responsibility
                                         
                                         of being an actor themselves and trying
                                         
                                         to entertain people is where you battled with, okay, how
                                         
                                         do I handle the situation? Because you can't please everyone. And not that you should not
                                         
    
                                         attempt to as a performer, but to know that it will never be 100% response or review when
                                         
                                         people see or stop or anything, you know, singing, dancing or being an athlete.
                                         
                                         So I felt if a younger me would have gotten just, I don't know, it's tough to articulate
                                         
                                         what, it would just be somebody from that feel or somebody from just telling you that this the next day that
                                         
                                         you feel is your is like the end of everything or this audition is the be all and end all.
                                         
                                         It's not life, life will give you not a second chance but I think you can't. It's doing
                                         
                                         no good to put all that focus or thing that oh, oh my God, it's work.
                                         
                                         Because you get into a negative zone,
                                         
    
                                         I used to get into a very anxious, you know, negative zone,
                                         
                                         like, oh my God, if this doesn't work out,
                                         
                                         and I would start thinking about that, we can,
                                         
                                         you know, 10 days before, and I missed out my 10 days,
                                         
                                         I could have done something else,
                                         
                                         I could have done something more productive
                                         
                                         with those 10 days, but the anxiety of building it up, you know, before the 10 days, oh my God, it's on the 10th. Okay,
                                         
                                         I'm on the 1st of the week, 1st of the month. Oh my God. But it wasn't productive. I wish somebody
                                         
    
                                         would have told me a product to use those those 10 days free to any big event of their life.
                                         
                                         those those 10 days pre to any big event of your life.
                                         
                                         You know, start as never help anyone. And I used to be sweating in a bunch of like
                                         
                                         nervous and we still are all actors. I think all actors to date when our movies release, there's an immense amount of anxiety that come in whether you I've spoken to senior actors,
                                         
                                         you know, whether you're working for 10 years,
                                         
                                         or 20 years, or 25 years.
                                         
                                         So I think you can't change that situation,
                                         
                                         but one can only change themselves.
                                         
    
                                         And yeah, I would be looking for that practical advice
                                         
                                         for those candidates before my exam match performance
                                         
                                         or whatever you want. You know, I think, I think it's really important before my exam match for Paul Mueh.
                                         
                                         Yeah, I think it's really important you said that
                                         
                                         because one of the things that I've done
                                         
                                         is I've realized that every time I do something new
                                         
                                         or I have a new launch or a new interview
                                         
                                         or a new meeting or like I was nervous
                                         
    
                                         before I spoke to you the first time.
                                         
                                         You know, and that's a good thing.
                                         
                                         Like I liked that, and I've trained my mind to recognize
                                         
                                         that that's actually excitement.
                                         
                                         That there is a sense of excitement in that nervousness.
                                         
                                         And that if you start to look for that excitement,
                                         
                                         then actually you start to realize,
                                         
                                         oh wait a minute, I am nervous and anxious,
                                         
    
                                         but there's a part of me that's also very excited and like,
                                         
                                         I'm gonna discover something new.
                                         
                                         But one thing that's really helped me
                                         
                                         with anxiety is breath work.
                                         
                                         So breathing and meditation has helped me so much.
                                         
                                         And obviously, in Indian culture, meditation and prayer
                                         
                                         is a huge part of your life, young.
                                         
                                         But to really use breath work to slow down your heart rate and to bring down your
                                         
    
                                         pace of breath and to deepen your breath.
                                         
                                         It biologically changes how you feel.
                                         
                                         And I think that's what's so powerful about breathing is that whenever I feel nervous,
                                         
                                         if I'm about to go on stage in front of 10,000, 30,000 people, or if I'm about to go on
                                         
                                         TV for an interview, or if I'm about to go on TV for an interview,
                                         
                                         or if I'm just walking into a new meeting where I don't know the person, I focus on breathing
                                         
                                         in for a count of four, one, two, three, four, and you breathe out for more than four.
                                         
                                         So you breathe out for more than four.
                                         
    
                                         And when you breathe in and out in that way, you just start to slow down your whole body and mind
                                         
                                         and you just get out of your head.
                                         
                                         And my favorite technique, which I was trained in as a monk,
                                         
                                         but is also used by therapists and psychologists today,
                                         
                                         is often when you get lost in your head,
                                         
                                         that's where anxiety is, right?
                                         
                                         You feel it in your head like your mind's just going crazy.
                                         
                                         This technique is known as a grounding technique.
                                         
    
                                         It's fantastic. And it's called the 5, 4 technique is known as a grounding technique. It's fantastic.
                                         
                                         And it's called the five, four, three, two, one method.
                                         
                                         So when you're too stuck in your head
                                         
                                         and you're feeling anxious, you ask yourself,
                                         
                                         what are the five things I can see in this room right now?
                                         
                                         So I can see the ceiling, I can see the floor,
                                         
                                         I can see the wall, I can see that painting behind you,
                                         
                                         I can see my bed.
                                         
    
                                         And you say, what are the four things I can touch?
                                         
                                         So I can touch my shirt, I can touch my trousers,
                                         
                                         I can touch my, the chair,
                                         
                                         and I'm feeling the coolness of the table.
                                         
                                         I have a marble table in front of me, it's cool,
                                         
                                         but this chair is slightly warmer.
                                         
                                         And then what are the three things I can hear?
                                         
                                         So you just be silent for a second,
                                         
    
                                         go, what are the three things I can hear?
                                         
                                         So I hear my wife upstairs, I hear some birds outside and then I hear the sound from my phone
                                         
                                         and my laptop. What are the two things that I can smell? So you just breathe in.
                                         
                                         What are the sense and what's the one thing I can taste? And so when you do this five four three two
                                         
                                         one technique, you get out of your head and you get into the present moment, which allows you to take a breath and get away
                                         
                                         from your anxiety. So those are two things that I've definitely used that have been really
                                         
                                         powerful for me, especially in those before something big days.
                                         
                                         Oh wow. So that's pretty much your covering all your senses. That would be interesting,
                                         
    
                                         because most of us they acting workshop workshops
                                         
                                         That's what we do like a lot of breath work and and manipulating emotions
                                         
                                         It's got got to do a lot to do with with say your breath. It would be you would exhale and you know when you're crying
                                         
                                         You would inhale more differently. It's it's kind of a rhythm
                                         
                                         But those are interesting techniques now. I'm going to use it for my next event.
                                         
                                         To me as well, I think yoga has been a great, great help in recent times, recent months. I've
                                         
                                         done more extensive yoga because of the time that I get. And it's again about breadth and it's
                                         
                                         different. Like when they talk about Prana and Yoga,
                                         
    
                                         the squat I do in the gym is different
                                         
                                         when I'm squatting if I would do yoga in it,
                                         
                                         because it's different kind of breath,
                                         
                                         it's a different kind of strength that you need.
                                         
                                         Yes.
                                         
                                         And for me, that has technically helped me to just,
                                         
                                         go more inwards and really observe and I was lucky
                                         
                                         enough to have a good teacher as well. So I think the addictive now, yes I do, at least twice,
                                         
    
                                         twice a week, I have to, you know, go on to the mat and sweat it out. I feel sweat as well
                                         
                                         biologically, like when you run things out, like I use cardio recently now for the last year or so.
                                         
                                         As something to just get all on it's not it is fitness. Yes everybody should be fit and
                                         
                                         workout. I use it and works out for me. But I feel once people realize that you know
                                         
                                         your body, if you can't control your mind, I can control my body. And if my mind will
                                         
                                         hopefully follow. So I'm all for like, you know, hitting anything, running, cycling,
                                         
                                         and just consistently sweating. And it kind of leaves all the anxiety. I tend to
                                         
                                         have a lot of anger that I hold on to different situations or my dealings.
                                         
    
                                         And I feel that kind of calms me down.
                                         
                                         I'm addicted to sweating every day.
                                         
                                         Because otherwise I would break.
                                         
                                         You know, otherwise I would go on set and I'd be
                                         
                                         in a different mood.
                                         
                                         I need to be a little different.
                                         
                                         So I feel it is important to go through your body as well.
                                         
                                         It is connected.
                                         
    
                                         I feel it's very difficult for me to only to control my mind.
                                         
                                         So I kind of use my physical body aspect to relax.
                                         
                                         Whether it's your spine, whether it's your muscles,
                                         
                                         whether it's your body.
                                         
                                         It is the most difficult thing to say that yes,
                                         
                                         you should work out and be fit, but it is like,
                                         
                                         it's not going to be true.
                                         
                                         Can't deny that.
                                         
    
                                         So people need to know that it's more to do with just fitness.
                                         
                                         Actually, if you do it long enough,
                                         
                                         I think you'll see the magic that happens if your body is holding
                                         
                                         lesser amount of weight or water or if you just look good and you see yourself in the
                                         
                                         mirror and you'll feel happy there and there.
                                         
                                         So, I think I'm breathing and I would say breathing and fitness is something that I use as
                                         
                                         well, put in different methods,
                                         
                                         but I really like your methods.
                                         
    
                                         I'm going to steal that and try it in my next event.
                                         
                                         I agree with you.
                                         
                                         I agree with you with exercise.
                                         
                                         I think that's such an important message because we think that exercise, you do it because
                                         
                                         it's how you care how you look, but actually it's not.
                                         
                                         What you're saying is so true, that exercise is about how you care how you look. But actually it's not what you're saying is so true that
                                         
                                         exercise is about how you feel and we all feel better when we exercise. It's not about looking
                                         
                                         a certain way or having a certain body or having a, it's not about that. It's about really feeling
                                         
    
                                         different and exercise boosts your mood. And the four habits that I recommend everyone does every day
                                         
                                         And the four habits that I recommend everyone does every day come in the form of the acronym T-I-M-E
                                         
                                         and I'm mentioning this because Sid has mentioned two of them.
                                         
                                         So the T is thankfulness.
                                         
                                         So first is gratitude.
                                         
                                         If you have gratitude in your life,
                                         
                                         which is a mental activity, you feel amazing.
                                         
                                         If you thank people, if you acknowledge people,
                                         
    
                                         if you recognize people, I is for inspiration.
                                         
                                         We have to feed ourselves with inspiration
                                         
                                         every day. It can be a book, a podcast, a conversation, a prayer, a quote, a paragraph from a book
                                         
                                         you love. It can be anything. M is for meditation and E is for exercise. So I'm so glad you mentioned
                                         
                                         exercise because exercise is chemically shown to boost your mood. And so, again, please don't think of exercise anyone who's watching listening
                                         
                                         as a pursuit for a different type of body.
                                         
                                         That's not the only reason the reason for exercises to feel different.
                                         
                                         This is what it sounds like inside the box card.
                                         
    
                                         I'm journalist in Al Morton in my podcast, City of the Rails.
                                         
                                         I plunge into the dark world of America's railroads,
                                         
                                         searching for my daughter Ruby, who ran off to hop train.
                                         
                                         I'm just like stuck on this train,
                                         
                                         not where I'm gonna end up, and I jump.
                                         
                                         Following my daughter, I found a secret city
                                         
                                         of unforgettable characters, living outside society,
                                         
                                         off the grid and on the edge.
                                         
    
                                         I was in love with a lifestyle and the freedom
                                         
                                         of this community.
                                         
                                         No one understands who we truly are.
                                         
                                         The Rails made me question everything I knew
                                         
                                         about motherhood, history, and the thing we call the American Dream.
                                         
                                         It's the last vestige of American freedom.
                                         
                                         Everything about it is extreme.
                                         
                                         You're either going to die or you
                                         
    
                                         can have this incredible rebirth and really understand who you are.
                                         
                                         Come with me to find out what waits for us and the city of the rails. Listen to
                                         
                                         City of the Rails on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your
                                         
                                         podcasts. Or cityoftherails.com.
                                         
                                         I'm Jay Shetty and on my podcast on purpose, I've had the honor to sit down with some of
                                         
                                         the most incredible hearts and minds on the planet.
                                         
                                         Oprah, everything that has happened to you can also be a strength builder for you if
                                         
                                         you allow it.
                                         
    
                                         Kobe Bryant.
                                         
                                         The results don't really matter.
                                         
                                         It's the figuring out that matters.
                                         
                                         Kevin Haw.
                                         
                                         It's not about us as a generation at this point.
                                         
                                         It's about us trying our best to create change.
                                         
                                         Lumin's Hamilton.
                                         
                                         That's for me being taking that moment for yourself each day,
                                         
    
                                         being kind to yourself, because I think for a long time,
                                         
                                         I wasn't kind to myself.
                                         
                                         And many, many more.
                                         
                                         If you're attached to knowing, you don't have a capacity to learn.
                                         
                                         On this podcast, you get to hear the raw, real-life stories behind their journeys and the tools
                                         
                                         they used, the books they read, and the people that made a difference in their lives so that
                                         
                                         they can make a difference in hours.
                                         
                                         Listen to on-purpose with Jay Shetty on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever
                                         
    
                                         you get your podcasts.
                                         
                                         Join the journey soon.
                                         
                                         I'm Danny Shapiro, host of Family Secrets.
                                         
                                         It's hard to believe we're entering our eighth season, and yet we're constantly discovering
                                         
                                         new secrets.
                                         
                                         The depths of them, the variety of them, continues to be astonishing.
                                         
                                         I can't wait to share ten incredible stories with you, stories of tenacity, resilience,
                                         
                                         and the profoundly necessary excavation of long-held family
                                         
    
                                         secrets.
                                         
                                         When I realized this is not just happening to me, this is who and what I am.
                                         
                                         I needed her to help me.
                                         
                                         Something was annoying at me that I couldn't put my finger on, that I just felt somehow
                                         
                                         that there was a piece missing.
                                         
                                         Why not restart? Look at all the things that were going wrong.
                                         
                                         I hope you'll join me and my extraordinary guests
                                         
                                         for this new season of Family Secrets.
                                         
    
                                         Listen to season 8 of Family Secrets
                                         
                                         on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
                                         
                                         Again, when I saw this ball, I'd take it a go when I did
                                         
                                         somewhere through a friend of mine to just have a gratitude
                                         
                                         journal, you know, the pinpoint things that you're
                                         
                                         grateful for. And that worked really well for me in my
                                         
                                         early years of being an actor. Even today, I do it
                                         
                                         I do it less, less or now, I would say I have to go back,
                                         
    
                                         but I would say, I would thank for the simplest and the smallest thing, like,
                                         
                                         you know, thank you for a great workout today, thank you for this amazing meeting,
                                         
                                         you know, I'm really thankful, like today would be, I'm really happy that I'm speaking to you on
                                         
                                         on this platform. So, and I feel, and I used to do it before sleeping, so right, the time and that, that used to
                                         
                                         really, you know, ground me before I go into sleep and I kind of take all that positivity
                                         
                                         of the day and have better sleep, which again I feel is of people when you're anxious,
                                         
                                         people, I've heard of people who find it very difficult to sleep long hours
                                         
                                         and I've experienced it myself when I'm extremely anxious about one particular event or
                                         
    
                                         or a day. I would have broke the peak and I think that's something that is detrimental to
                                         
                                         your next day. It doesn't let you mentally, physically,
                                         
                                         be ready for what you really want to be, it's actually adversely affecting your efficiency
                                         
                                         the next day, if you're next week or whatever you're looking forward to.
                                         
                                         So yeah, actually I would say this gratitude or writing down or painting it down as to
                                         
                                         the things you're thankful for would really
                                         
                                         help you feel happy before sleeping and feel more relaxed. I love this man. Everyone, I'm so grateful
                                         
                                         and thankful on that note to Sid for staying out late even though he says it's not late. Sleeping
                                         
    
                                         early is also very good for mental health so that's definitely in the quarter one.
                                         
                                         also very good for mental health. So that's definitely in the quarter one.
                                         
                                         Yeah, but I want to thank you, Sid, for doing this, for taking part in this festival, for using your platform to spread a powerful and important message, hearing it from you. So many people will
                                         
                                         feel inspired and empowered to make a change in their life. The journey you've been on, the
                                         
                                         incredible success that you've had, but your honesty and openness, you stay so grounded. And I said this to you when we're on the phone
                                         
                                         the other day, you're super humble and an approachable guy. And I think that that's what is your
                                         
                                         unique quality. And I can't wait to hang out with you when I get to Mumbai, man. So I'm looking
                                         
                                         to go to it. You're the first person that I've met in this lockdown virtually. And I haven't met
                                         
    
                                         you in person. So I'm on look over to that.
                                         
                                         And again, thank you so much and you keep inspiring us with your words.
                                         
                                         And you are using social media for the positivity that it's supposed to be.
                                         
                                         I remember I sent you that text of this simple window that got help in New Delhi,
                                         
                                         which became which started trending, you know,
                                         
                                         a small jl dhava.
                                         
                                         And it was amazing to see how you can use social media
                                         
                                         to in a positive state.
                                         
    
                                         And help somebody make an honest living, you know,
                                         
                                         when that gentleman, one particular man put this old couple
                                         
                                         so off one particular location in Delhi and he's like, you know, no one's
                                         
                                         buying my food, I have a small stall and he was crying, he was in tears and
                                         
                                         that kind of trended. And after my family in Delhi, who I was sent as well.
                                         
                                         And they were like hundreds of people, hundreds of people outside trying to buy food and he had so much work and the best thing I liked about that guys is when somebody
                                         
                                         tried to give him extra money, he said, no, what do you want to eat? I'm just going to charge you for whatever you take, I know some are not going to take money. So I think that is a country like India. And I would say, and a thought came up,
                                         
                                         which I would want to tell everyone that, you know, if we could, as a society in India,
                                         
    
                                         in any city, help one such vendor to earn an honest living by just making that trend,
                                         
                                         it would really do so much good in everyone's life. Like one person like that per week would be amazing
                                         
                                         because you know, I mean, you've been in India,
                                         
                                         you know, made so much help.
                                         
                                         So yeah, I hope that I think people talk about something
                                         
                                         try to help somebody in the real world,
                                         
                                         yeah, come on, so hopefully we can make difference.
                                         
                                         I love it.
                                         
    
                                         Thank you Sid, Matt, you're amazing.
                                         
                                         I love that message and everyone should go and check out that video. It's
                                         
                                         It's incredible to see the impact of social media and Sid, we're going to do a lot more of this. So I'm excited, man. I'm really, really
                                         
                                         Excited. Thank you so much for lovely words and feelings. Thank you so much. Thank you, man. I appreciate that you've given.
                                         
                                         Hey everyone, thank you so much for listening to this conversation with Sid today. I really hope it gave you some ideas about how to take little moments to prioritize your
                                         
                                         mental health despite the weight of cultural stigma.
                                         
                                         Make sure you tag me and sit on Instagram with your thoughts about his strategies for
                                         
                                         building a personal mental health practice.
                                         
    
                                         I thank you so much for being part of the on-purpose community.
                                         
                                         Thank you so much. have a wonderful weekend,
                                         
                                         and don't forget to look out for episodes next Monday
                                         
                                         and next Friday. I'm Jay Shetty and on my podcast on purpose, I've had the honor to sit down with some of
                                         
                                         the most incredible hearts and minds on the planet.
                                         
                                         Oprah, Kobe Bryant, Kevin Hart, Lewis Hamilton, and many, many more.
                                         
                                         On this podcast, you get to hear the raw, real-life stories behind their journeys and the tools
                                         
                                         they used, the books they read, and the people that made a difference in their lives so that
                                         
    
                                         they can make a difference in hours.
                                         
                                         Listen to on purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast or wherever
                                         
                                         you get your podcast.
                                         
                                         Join the journey soon.
                                         
                                         Our 20s are often seen as this golden decade.
                                         
                                         Our time to be carefree, make mistakes and figure out our lives. But what can psychology
                                         
                                         teach us about this time? I'm Gemma Speg, the host of the Psychology of Your 20s.
                                         
                                         Each week, we take a deep dive into a unique aspect of our 20s, from career anxiety,
                                         
    
                                         mental health, heartbreak, money, and much more to explore the science behind our experiences.
                                         
                                         The Psychology of Your 20s hosted by me, Gemma Speg.
                                         
                                         Listen now on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast,
                                         
                                         or wherever you get your podcasts.
                                         
                                         When my daughter ran off to hop trains,
                                         
                                         I was terrified I'd never see her again.
                                         
                                         So I followed her into the train yard.
                                         
                                         This is what it sounds like inside the box-top.
                                         
    
                                         And into the city of the rails,
                                         
                                         there I found a surprising world, so brutal and beautiful,
                                         
                                         that it changed me, but the rails do that to everyone.
                                         
                                         There is another world out there, and if you want to play with the devil,
                                         
                                         you're gonna find them down in the rail yard.
                                         
                                         Undenail Morton, come with me to find out what waits for us and the city of the rails.
                                         
                                         Listen to City of the Rails on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your
                                         
                                         podcasts.
                                         
    
                                         Or, cityoftherails.com.
                                         
