On Purpose with Jay Shetty - CARDI B: Overcoming Depression, Blocking Out the Hate & Owning Your Power

Episode Date: October 6, 2025

What’s the hardest part about letting go? What helped you start healing after that? Today, Jay sits down with Grammy Award–winning artist Cardi B for a rare and intimate conversation that reveals the woman behind the spotlight. From an early age, Cardi carried big dreams and an unshakable belief that she was meant for more. She opens up about the quiet moments she spent planning her future, the determination that pushed her beyond the challenges of her upbringing, and the resilience that continues to drive her today. Cardi reflects on how those experiences not only fueled her success but also shaped her greatest mission, creating a better life for her children. Together, Jay and Cardi dive into the complex balance between success and struggle, from the weight of constant scrutiny to her most vulnerable battles with depression and the pain of being misunderstood. Cardi opens up about the loneliness she’s faced, the toll of public criticism, and how she found the strength to rise again when life felt overwhelming. Cardi reflects on the challenges of balancing motherhood and career, the values she’s determined to instill in her children, and why building independence has been the key to protecting everything she’s worked so hard for. Cardi also shares how her unwavering faith and deep connection with God have been the foundation of her resilience. She reminds us that real strength isn’t found in perfection, but in the decision to rise after every setback, to hold onto hope when the world doubts you, and to keep working relentlessly toward the life you envision. In this interview, you'll learn: How to Stay Strong Through Criticism How to Keep Your Mental Health in Check How to Balance Motherhood and Career How to Find Your True Calling How to Break Free From Your Environment How to Use Faith to Overcome Struggles How to Keep Working When Life Gets Hard Every setback is an invitation to grow, every criticism a chance to reaffirm your worth, and every season of struggle is a reminder that brighter days are possible. Trust the path you’re on, lean into your resilience, and protect the vision you hold for your life, because it is always worth fighting for. With Love and Gratitude, Jay Shetty What We Discuss: 00:00 Intro 01:21 An Early Passion for Reading 02:29 What Would You Do With One Day of Anonymity? 03:32 Dreaming, Planning, and Envisioning 07:03 Discovering Your True Calling 09:22 Where Do You Get Your Personality From? 10:29 Embracing Your Quiet Side 12:12 How Environment Shapes Growth 19:34 Defining Success On Your Own Terms  22:30 Protecting Your Peace from Negativity 27:33 When Your Heart Isn’t Ready to Let Go 31:44 Overcoming Heartbreak and Loss 34:29 Time Heals All Wounds 36:48 Proving Your Hard Work Is Worth It  42:05 Keep Believing in Yourself 45:40 Feeling Misunderstood 50:34 Balancing Work and Motherhood 52:40 Teaching Children Not to Be Lazy 57:14 Raising Disciplined and Strong Adults 01:00:08 The Little Things That Make You Happy 01:02:20 Redefining Love  01:05:42 Am I the Drama? 01:09:02 Speaking Your Mind Without Fear 01:12:07 Age Brings Wisdom 01:14:33 Does Life Ever Get Easier? 01:17:36 The Power of Daily Prayer 01:20:18 Cardi on Final Five Episode Resources: Cardi B | Website Cardi B | YouTube Cardi B | Instagram Cardi B | X Cardi B | TikTokSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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so you can work, create, and boost productivity all on one device. Hey guys, it's AZFUD. You may know me as a gold medalist. You may know me as an NCAA national champion. You may even know me as the People's Princess. Every week on my new podcast, Fud around and find out. I'll be talking to some special guests about pop culture, basketball, and what it's like to be a professional athlete on and off the court.

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day. I felt in the deepest depression that I had ever had. The number one health and wellness podcast. Jay Shetty. Jay Shetty. He won. The only. Cardi B, welcome to On Purpose. Hi. Oh, my gosh. I have to tell you something, and I mean this, you can go back six years when I launched the podcast. People would always ask me, they'd say, who do you want on the show?

Yeah. Like, who would be your dream guest? And I'd always say, Cardi B, and I'll tell you why, I'll tell you why, because no one would ever put us in the same room together. We're just so different externally, but I believe there's a. there's a spiritual connection that we'll find out today. You know, it's so funny, I saw a video of you, and I definitely won't, I was like, I want to send it to my boyfriend, but it's about, like, asking difficult questions. And it's like when you, when you ask difficult questions and you get through, you get over the difficult question and you discuss the difficult questions, it really do make you stronger.

It really do make the relationship stronger. It's like, oh my gosh, he really is like, is he a psychic? Did you send it to him? Did you send it to your boyfriend? What did he say? He was like, yeah, exactly. And it was like, yeah, exactly. Did it change any behavior?

We'll see. Okay, okay. On the next question. I love it. I love it. I wanted to ask you, first of all, I heard that you have a hidden talent that you can name the 46 presidents in order.

Is that real? I can't. It comes and go. It comes and go. It comes and go. I just know a lot of weird. different facts about presidents. Okay.

And people would be like, but why? That is so random. Like when I was younger, I didn't really have like Nintendo's and I didn't. Sometimes I had cable and sometimes I didn't. So I just really had no choice but to read. And like I like to read like factual stuff. So I would just read like a whole bunch of history things. Like me, I would literally, when I'm bored, like you know how they give you the history

books in your school? I would literally read the whole history book in a week from front to back. Just because I'm bored. Wow. That's impressive, though. Do you still get bored now? Do you even have time to be bored? I don't be bored, but that's like what I really just like to watch and everything.

So, like I watch it, like, I watch YouTube's on, like, factual things. Like, I just get into certain topics and I always go down a rabbit hole. And then I'd be obsessed with it for a week. And then it's just like whatever. Yeah. I feel like you can't go anywhere without being recognized. I mean, you have such an iconic look. Even today, I was admiring it when you walked in.

I was like, what inspires this? But if you could be anonymous for 24 hours, what would you do? If no one could recognize you, no one could see you, what would you do? Well, you know what's so funny? Like, I really do, like, I don't always look like this. So I usually go outside, probably with glasses or probably not, but I always go outside with like an oversized hoodie. And then I'm not even going to lie due to COVID for like a long time.

It really did help using the mask. but I do a lot of things by myself and no security just because I'm a person that if I want to if I want to go and buy a steak to cook I will go downstairs to Whole Foods and buy it and I don't care and no one will know and no one will see you they might or they might not but I feel like I already maneuver how to like oh it's Cardi B and I just walk fast and maneuver my way around

that's impressive yeah you know this show is all about getting to know the person behind the music, behind the stardom, behind the fame, getting to know the human behind it. Yeah. And I feel like your journey, even though you've talked about it, I'd love to dive into some parts that I find fascinating. Yeah. And I wanted to ask you, what's a childhood memory that you have that you think defines

who you are today? Oh, it's a lot. Well, it's not really like a childhood memory, but me and my sister, we used to go to the same school, right, even though like she's three years younger than me. And she always be telling me this thing, right? She always be telling me this. She always tells me like, oh, I used to see you in the cafeteria in the morning by yourself with your head down. And I used to feel so bad for you. And it's like, why? And she's like, I don't know, because you just looked so lonely. And I used to tell her, Like, it's like, I was not lonely.

I just always need time to think and be by myself. Like, I'm a person that I have friends, but I don't really like to be around people that much sometimes. I just, I'm always in my thoughts. Like, there's like 100 people, and I feel like it's been like that since I was five years old. They're talking my head and plan things out, plan my future, plan my life. It's like I'm playing dollhouse in my head. You know, like, when you play with your doors and you make. make a scenario, not a scenario, or like you, you build your home and this and you're that.

Yeah, like a little universe or world. Like a little universe. I'm always planning a universe in my head. And it's just sometimes people say that I have like an interesting look. Like if I'm spaced out, I'm not spaced out. I'm deep in my universe and planning five years ahead. Wow. So you're dreaming, planning, visioning.

You do these different workers, different use in your head have different names or personalities or no it's just no it's not really no different personalities it's just straight planning tomorrow straight planning for five years straight straight imagining what i what i want wow and it's crazy because it's like everything that i planned for since i was five and dreamed of i really gotten it wow even when i was like younger you know when i was like younger you know when i was like younger, I used to look at my mom and I used to be like, I want to be so pretty and beautiful like her. And I grew up to be the pretty beautiful woman that she is. But I also wanted, like, to be very successful, very, I'm not going to say rich, but like very successful. I really

hated being poor and i used to say like is that i refuse to have kids and raise them in the hood i have to find a way to never do that but i always wanted kids and i figured it out and i not only did i figure it out but it's like i always have plan b c's and d but i don't i didn't have to settle for plan B, C, and D, I had, I settle for my dream. Like, this is my dream job, and I have it. It's a little bit more difficult than what I saw in my dreams. But I'm living it. Yeah.

It's what I always wanted. Yeah, that's incredible. As that little girl who was sitting alone that your sister said, she would see you and she'd feel sorry for you, but inside your head you were dreaming. Mm-hmm. Was it dreaming about music? Was it dreaming about getting out of the hood? What were those dreams?

What did they look like to that little girl back then? I always felt like I was going to be a superstar. And it's so weird because my grandma, she has like a lot of grandkids, but she always used to tell me that. And it's like, why you always used to tell, like, I don't understand why she used to tell me that all the time. Like, I used to be like a little black sheep. I used to like nag a lot. I have like cousins that they're very pretty. They have beautiful, beautiful eyes.

They just stand out so much. And it's not that I don't stand out. It's just like, everybody in my grandma used to be like, you're going to be a superstar. You need to practice how to sing because you're going to be a superstar. And I just knew I was meant to be something. Like, for some reason, me and my sister, we have, like, really strong personalities. And I feel like the things that they used to tell me that would tell her the same thing, too. like all my teachers

all my friends they're going to be like you're going to be somebody you're going to be somebody someday but I always just wonder like it's like what is my calling because I used to like

acting in school but I'm not a good actress I used to like singing but I'm not a good I'm not the greatest singer like from the pack from the school I'm not the greatest singer

like if I will audition for a play they will pick somebody else because they sing better than me or they will pick somebody else because they act better than me So, and then it's like, oh, people used to say, like, I'm so funny, but it's like, I'm not a comedian standout show. Like, it's like, I am, I'm naturally funny, but I can't see it as my job. Just, just my mouth.

This is just me being me. So it's like, what is my calling? And I always wonder, what is my calling that everybody say that it's like, I'm going to be somebody, but what am I going to be? I don't know. And God gave it to me. God show it to me. And God really did give it to me. and here I am

and I just can't believe that millions of people know me Yeah, congratulations when I hear you say that and you always exude this confidence you're outspoken, you're bold was it always like that since you were a young girl or did that develop over time?

What did, where did that come from? I was like born like this. I was always, I always been like this. Like I got my real quiet side and I always got like into my self-side because like I said, I'd be in my own universe, quiet, planning and planning. But I feel like when I open my mouth or when I am who I am,

it's just, this is just how I am. But if I kind of think about it, I mean, like my family are very, like, funny. They're very loud. My parents are a little different from each other, but they're very loud. They have very strong personalities, both of them. So I feel like it just all. Came into you. Came into me.

Yeah. So it's like, you know how people, I don't know, maybe, you know how people, parents give their kids their looks? Yeah. I think my parents gave me a mix of, they both personality. I'm a little bit of both of them. Cardi B. even still today finds time for her quiet side. I'm naturally quiet, though. I mean, like, tell me about that.

I want to know about that. I'm like, I don't think people know that. Yeah, like I'm naturally in my room, just deep in my thoughts and just deep, deep, deep, deep. deep, deep. I might just talk to you the whole day as a friend on the phone, but I don't really want to see you, which is so weird. Like, I could talk to my friends all day long, but I like to be by myself all the time.

Are people surprised when they figure that out with you? Yeah. And my friends don't feel a certain type of way about that because they know me. They know I'm not the friend that want to go out to dinner. They know that I'm not that. They know I'm not the friend that, oh, I'm just. going to go to your house and chill and blah, blah, blah. But we will be on the phone, like, forever.

So what about, like, parties, events, all of that kind of stuff? That's like, is it work? Is it networking? I do like to party, but sometimes I haven't even really had the time for it lately. I haven't really have the time for it. And to be honest with you, even before I was, like, famous and everything, I wasn't really a club girl. I was already a dancer.

So I work in the club. So it's like, I didn't really care to like, oh, I'm going to the club today for what? I work in it. Like, it's just like I always been like a person that just work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, focus on the bigger picture. Just focus on the biggest thing. I always wanted kids. So the goal is to be comfortable before the kids get here. Yeah, yeah.

That was always my goal. My goal was always to be a mother but having your own. I had my own before I became a mother. Yeah, I mean, you said just a few months. moments ago that you didn't want to raise kids in the hood. Talk to me about what we don't know about that. Like, how hard was it? What was it that was so bad that you were like, I could never raise my kids in the place I grew up in? It's just a lot of things. Like, sometimes when kids are, like, bad or they get into trouble, people automatically blame the parents. And you can have

the best parents. Like, my parents, they are not criminals. They have never even committed a crime. My grandma used to tell my mom a lot, like, it's like, you're pretty for no reason. And I feel like they used to tell her that because it's like she's so pretty. So it's like, you know, Caribbean folks is like when you're pretty and you're this and that, it's like they always expect you to be with a man that got a lot of money. And my mom, she was never even that type of person. She was a very modest and honest, hardworking woman. So at my dad, he's a good man.

He's a party animal, but he's a good man. He's a good person. He's a good dad. However, you will end up going in the wrong path or going in the wrong direction because the influence around you, because certain peer pressure or because you almost have no choice, especially if you're a boy. You never know if you're going to have a boy or girl, especially if you're a boy. And when you are a girl, it is a little bit difficult.

It is a little bit tougher. I feel like people just grow a little bit faster in the hood. like when I was 11 years old there was girls in my class in the 6th grade 11 years old I have nieces that are 11 years old they all they want to do is play Roblox nowadays but when I was 11 years old

there was girls that were already at 11 in 6th grade so it's like you go certain paths path or your environments like boys too in the hood they're a little faster. So, you know, you will be walking down the block

and the typical little bad boy, he'll slap your ass out of nowhere. He'll slap your ass out of nowhere. You start arguing on him. He'll smack to the shot out your face. That's how boys, a lot of boys in the Bronx are. They're very, like, aggressive. They're aggressive of girls. They're aggressive.

They grouped out. They grope you. You just never know. Like, one of the reasons also why I'm so witty with my mouth, people were like, why are you so witty? Why are you so thinking? Like, going to school, it was like, it's almost like, like, I think that's why I'm always so tough. Like, boys or girls, mostly boys.

They used to, like, kind of like make fun of certain things, but not only just me to everybody. Like, look at your shoes, they're leaning, look at your hair, your hair is never not done. So I used to go home. And I used to go in the mirror and practice my jokes. And the next day, I will be like, all right, I can't wait till he flamed me. I got a joke or two for him. That's why I'm so witty too as well. So it's like, I don't want to raise my kids in that type of environment.

I don't want to. And then on top of that, it is like, it is fun. I had a lot of fun in the hood. But it's like, it's not fun. Like, for me, right? It's not fun living in a, apartment, right? And contrary to what I say, I don't cook, I don't clean. I grew up with a mom that will make me brush the corners, the corners of the apartment, like brush it by hand.

That's how clean my home had to be, my crib had to be. Every day I was doing dishes. Every day I was mopping floors. Every day I was making sure that I go outside to the parking lot and take out the garbage. And even though, no matter how clean your apartment is, there will still be roaches, there will still be mice because your neighbor probably a hoarder. The person downstairs is dirty. Y'all all live in the same building. You cannot avoid certain rotants and stuff. And it's like, I don't want to put my kids through that. And it's like, I have to find another way. And then another thing that always, like, gets me in my head. It's like this one time, My mom, she was working very hard, but we still need to help.

So she went to welfare to get like benefit, like a benefit card and stuff like that. And the lady, like my mom, she's the type of person. Like it's like, if you're rude to her, she's going to be like, oh, I don't got to take this. And she would just storm out. Like, I don't got to take. Nobody got going to talk to me like that. She got a very strong character. And this lady was talking so rude and so nasty to my mom.

And she was taking it because we needed the help. I don't want nobody to feel like they have to talk to me a certain type of way because I need the help. And it's like, this could never, ever be me. I would never want to, like, be in a situation where I have to go get welfare. And the social worker is talking to me like I'm a dog. Like, I need you.

And I just felt so bad for my mom because she just felt. So I could tell on her face that she was just, like, looking for the papers that she needed. Like, it just, that. vision is always in my head and it's like, if you're getting me mad, I hope that lady, I want punching her face to this day. And I don't want that. I didn't want it that. Yeah. And as a woman, even if you get with a man with money, you should have your own.

Because one thing you learn from young, one thing I learned from having aunts, you can have a man with money, you can have a kid with money. If you stop doing what that man asks you to do, or if that man decides to leave, or if you deal with a man from the streets and you go to jail, that's your child. That's you. That's your responsibility.

That's your hustle. You got to grind for that child. It's always two parents, but sometimes not really two parents. And that could be alive right there and then. That's where you always got to have your own. It's not even about, oh, I don't need a man. I don't need the father.

I don't need the thing. But sometimes they get to the point that it's like they're going to make you feel that way. That's why you need it. I had cousins and I had aunts and I have it that is like the men have a little bit of money, have a little bit of land, have a little bit of this. And one of those men's are done and threw with you and put you off the ringer, it's like, yeah, I'm not dealing with that kid no more.

Or like, you get these $200 every three, four months when I want you to. I'm not dealing with that shit. That's why I was like, but I always wanted to have kids. So it's like, I have to have my own shit before I become a mom. And that's exactly what happened. And I only do it. And I only have one kid. I have three kids.

And that's exactly, not exactly the number that I want, but I always wanted a big family. Like, I love family. I love family. And there's a higher possibility that I won't be in a living assistant home with all the kids. How many kids do you want? I want like six. Okay. So three more.

Mm-hmm. I want like three more kids Three more kids I love that for you I mean hearing you say that I mean as I was listening to you I could tell there's like a There's almost like a

You can almost vision what that life was like Yeah And there's a part of you that's like So happy you got out at the same time There's there's such a part of it That's there inside of you That you've been fighting against You've been breaking out of right

Like for all of these years When was the moment you felt like, I'm out, like I broke out. Like, when was that moment where you really felt like I did it, I'm out, I made it, you know, I'm safe now. It's crazy because every single time I feel like I felt like I was safe, I really wasn't. Oh, interesting. Yeah.

When I got on TV, when I first got on TV, I was like, did I make it? I didn't feel like I made it because I used to see girls going reality TV shows and then they would end up right back in the strip club where I was at. So I never felt like it's like, oh, on TV, I made it. It's like I'm almost there, but I didn't make it. Then when I got signed to a label, it's like I'm almost near making it because I'm signed, but I'm not where I want to be. Where I really felt like I made it was when Borac Yellow came out, the million that I made,

the first real million that I made, I had to share nobody. I had to share with managers because they signed me to something. it's mine, it's mine, but I never felt comfortable. I still, to this day, don't feel comfortable, especially with how everybody just trying to take it from you all the time. It's like I fight every day to keep this level of success because people want to take it from you so bad and people just feel like they could tell you

when you deserve to have this success because it just looks so easy. But it's not. It really is not. It's a challenge to stay here. It's a challenge to stay relevant. It's a challenge to keep your mental health, right? It's a challenge to getting up.

Every day is a challenge. It's a job. Everybody has a job. You can't complain about getting up and doing a job. The only thing I could complain about is millions of people that love you. And then millions of people getting in your head and telling you that you don't deserve your job that you work hard for.

That's what it is. We all have jobs. That's what it is about being, oh, don't complain to them. Everybody won't complain, I work so hard, I work so hard, I work so hard. You have to work hard to pay your bills. But when you work hard and people tell you that you don't deserve the success that you have and you don't deserve to do what you do

after you put in so much work, that's what f***ed with you, for real. What makes you feel like that every day? What are the things that make you feel like there's people constantly coming at you? What does that look like in your life? I tell you something that I've been going on for like a hot minute, right?

Like a lot of people think that I put out music, that I don't be putting out of this and that. Because, I don't know, they always say that, like, I'm always getting pregnant all the time. But I don't think people follow timelines. When it comes to having kids, I'm very seasoned by now. I'm very seasoned right now. When I had my child at the beginning, I canceled going on a tour with Bruno Mars

because it was my first time having a kid. I did not know anything. I didn't have no nanny, no night nurse. I was figuring out all by myself. I was figuring out postpartum. I was figuring out everything, right? But even when I had a child, it didn't stop me. Three months after I gave birth, I was doing shows, four or five shows a week into COVID.

Then, COVID happened. And I put out this big record, WAP, and I put up up. Then I got pregnant. and people thought that I didn't put out an album because I got pregnant but the reason why I didn't put out an album is because I didn't have a body of work I just didn't have a body of work

so I couldn't put out no music because I didn't have a body of work then last year I was planning to have an album I was planning to put out an album but I couldn't focus I felt in the deepest depression that I had ever had

And with that depression, I couldn't function. I couldn't function at nothing. And when I talk about function, it's not even like, oh, just working. I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't do nothing. So that just halted everything that I had. So it's not really because of having a baby.

Sometimes too, I don't be wanting to put music because I love being in the studio and I love creating music and I love perfecting my. craft. And that's like baking a cake. You bake a cake, you practice baking a cake, you practice baking a cake. And then when you put out the songs, sometimes it be good. And sometimes, like, people would just be like, we hate it and she shouldn't be doing this. And that's like you're baking a cake. You bake a cake, you bake a cake. And people eat the cake. And then people be like, this is the worst cake ever. And they splatter it. Have you ever seen The Simpson? Yeah. Yeah. It's pretty sure when they splat the cake. That's how I'd be feeling.

And it's like, that is the worst feeling ever. That's like a guy who, and you think you have the best pussy in the world, and they tell you your pussy's trash. You should never get nobody no more. That's just how I feel. Like, you work, you work, you work. You try it on your best to perfect your craft. And somebody just told you, like, you shouldn't be doing this.

You should never do this ever in your life. It brings you down so much and it's, with your mental so much that it's like, This is why I kind of avoid it, just for a peace of mind, just for a piece of mind. I have been okay for almost a year. Like after I gave birth to my daughter, I was a little happy. I was going outside. I started dating. I started feeling really good.

Sometimes I have bad days. Sometimes I have good days because I feel like I'm resetting in life. last week when I put out a song and it's not really the criticism in the song the way that people ate me up, tore me up, chew me up just because of one song I felt like I didn't deserve that especially for a song that I put so much work in

that I just was like this is why I don't really put music out like this because I remember how this used to feel this is a very terrible feeling to have. this is a very terrible feeling to have and you tell yourself like it's like a lot of these people that are telling you these type of things don't have no jobs don't have no titles don't have no this but when it's millions and millions and hundreds of thousands of people like it's like not only are they criticizing the song they criticizing you as a whole it's just be like this is why

I don't really put things up too much because it's just like the mental health the peace of mind is so much you just got to ask yourself sometimes is it even worth it is it even worth it because I haven't felt down like last week for a very long time for almost like a year

almost like a year Wow Oh ancient. Still using yesterday's tech, upgrade to the thinkpad X1 carbon, ultra-light, ultra-powerful, and built for serious productivity with Intel core ultra-processors,

blazing speed, and AI power performance. It keeps up with your business, not the other way around. Whoa, this thing moves. Stop hitting snooze on new tech. Win the tech search at Lenovo.com. Unlock AI experiences with the ThinkPad X1 Carbon powered by Intel Core Ultra processors

so you can work, create, and boost Productivity, all on one device. When news broke earlier this year that baby KJ, a newborn in Philadelphia, had successfully received the world's first personalized gene editing treatment, it represented a milestone for both researchers and patients. But there's a gripping tale of discovery behind this accomplishment and its creators. I'm Evan Ratliff, and together with biographer Walter Isaacson, we're delving into the story of Nobel Prize winner Jennifer Dowdna, the woman who's helped change the trajectory of humanity.

Listen to Aunt CRISPR, the story of Jennifer. Dr. Daoudna with Walter Isaacson on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to the U versus you podcast. I'm Lex Barrero, and every week we sit down with some of the biggest names in entertainment to talk about the real stuff, the struggles, the doubts, and the breakthroughs that made them who they are. We go deep, exploring childhood trauma, family, overcoming loss, and the moments that shape

their journey. These honest conversations are meant to take the cape off our heroes, with the hope that their Humanity inspires you to become a better you and therefore set you free to live the life of your dreams. Here's a sneak peek. I'm trained to go compete. I'm trained to be, like, go harder. But sometimes that mentality stops you from stopping

and smelling the flowers in your own garden. Is it wrong to want more? We migrated. Our family migrated here. I'm like second generation. Who will have a trauma coming from a country, extranhero, and you get to States, and you knowles to English?

Listen to you versus you as part of Michael Tutta podcast. Network, available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Talk to me about that depression. For you as confident as you are, as bold as you are, to be so vulnerable. And I'm so sorry you went through that. But to be so honest and open about the fact that a year ago you were in this dark, depression, and it seems like the worst it had ever been. Yeah. What got you there?

Why were you feeling so low? It was just a lot of pressure from my career. And I also felt like my marriage, like I felt the love dying. From my end, from my end, from his end, I was very lonely because I chose to be lonely, choose to be lonely. I was saying like, you know what, I can go through this anymore. I have to put a stop to it.

But when I said I was going to put a stop to it, because you could say you're going to put a stop to it, and you could, you could go a month without being around somebody, it's not, it's not until you, it's not when you say so. It's when your heart say so. I kept telling myself, I will not contact this person for a month. I will not give in I will not forgive this easy

I will not go back I will not go to the patterns I will not go through it but I was crying every day I was hurt every day I was out here in LA in a mansion by myself I was thinking about it every single day

and when your heart is not done your heart is not done then I told myself I'm pregnant I'm going to accept the, I'm going to accept my flaws, the flaws that I bring in this marriage. I'm going to apologize for it, and I'm going to work on it. And when I take accountability and you take advantage of me taking accountability,

and you take that as a, see, I know she'd be back instead of me taking accountability, and you're taking advantage of that. It really just killed everything. And while it was dying, I had a human growing in me. And I just kept thinking, like, it's like, was life going to be without this person? What life going to be without raising my last child without this person? was life going to be with that person not being my friend anymore without nothing when you have those type of thoughts it would make you sad it will get you depressed it will have you lost

but i overcame that and i am the strongest that like i have ever been like i almost feel like when was i ever my strongest my the i felt my strongest my the i felt my strongest i felt my strongest when I was 22, 23, 24. That's when I felt like my strongest and I was like living in a power. And that's how I feel right now. Like I feel like I live in a power. And it took months for the heart to say

you're done instead of my mouth and my brain. My heart had to be like, you're done. Because you could say it and you could take actions. But even if you take actions, if you're not done, you're not done. Like I kept asking, like around that time, I was working with Shakira, and I was like, how the fuck did you overcame this? Like, how did you overcame this?

And it's like, it's going to happen. And it's like, it would never happen. And it happened. It took some crying. It took some thoughts, scary thoughts. But I'm here, honey. Yeah. I'm here, and I'm the strong as I've been.

And I'm just. I love hearing that. But it was hard. I can tell, I could tell, I could see it as I'm speaking to you. It's not easy. And I think those moments in all of our lives are the most difficult moments. What did you do for your mental health at that time? What did you do?

What actions did you take? What did you have to do to keep yourself together and come back the strongest you are right now? I think there are so many people who are listening who have probably been through similar things, who feel broken, feel hurt, feel lost and confused. What worked for you that helped you come back the strongest you've ever been? I don't know if it was just time because I kind of did a little bit of everything. Like, I did do therapy. I did saw a therapist.

She's really good, by the way. It was like on Zoom. And it was like, I was telling myself like, it's like, I can't believe I'm telling a whole stranger my feelings, my thoughts, my personal business for three, an hour straight. I was just like, what the what am I doing? That just feels so weird. I was in there.

I did therapy for, I did a couple of sessions. They didn't get me no nothing. I was all spring, all summer, recording. It just wasn't like enough. I just felt like I just had to let it die

on its own. Let things die on its own. And the bad thing about it is that it's like, not only am I dealing with that, that's my personal life. I was also dealing with fans putting pressure on me because they want, you know, they want an album, they want products for me.

I had people that don't like me talking down on me, and then I had peers trying to start problems with me. And all of that, while I was going through a mental, fucking breakdown at home. So it was just a lot. It was like, I'm trying to work it. I'm trying to sleep it.

After I gave birth to my daughter, my baby girl, I was just like, take a break from work. And I was just going out every weekend with my friends. It was scary talking to somebody else and giving them a little. little piece of me. Not just my heart, just a little piece of me. And, but I overcame that.

And I just, that's why I feel like I just became a little bit more better, like just resetting. Yeah, it's a good reminder that time is the ultimate reset. Mm-hmm. And time does have a healing power that we, you know,

the cliche of time heals, or wounds. But it's the truth. Yeah, it's a cliche because there's truth in it. Yeah. There's some reality in it, that time and distance and being patient enough. I was working with a client recently who was going through a breakup and when we would speak in the first month, she would tell me every single day that she couldn't stop thinking

about the guy she was breaking up with. That broke up with her. And then the second month, she'd tell me. every other day. And then the third month, you tell me once a week. Yeah. And then the fourth month, you was just telling me once a month. And I was like, you don't see it, but I see that it's affecting you less and less and less

as time goes on. But when it's you, you feel like you're just still stuck there. And so it's such a great reminder that time is the ultimate reset and time does heal. And just because time heal, like in the meantime, don't think that, like, you shouldn't, like, try to get help because it's like. like, therapy didn't really help me like that. It didn't work for you. Not as much.

Well, maybe because I didn't get to the part of where you get the help. Mm-hmm. I mean, I did do it like six sessions. I don't know if I don't know how fucking on. Like, sometimes when I give advice to girls, I be like, bitch, boss up. Boss up, go to work, get pretty. But even when I was doing that, I had, like, a pain in my heart. And sometimes when I was going out with my friends and I was having a good time,

it will always be like around 4.30 a.m. when it's time to go home and I'm drunk and I'm thinking to myself, I am alone. I don't have nobody to talk to. And it feels really weird and it feels very lonely, especially when you're used to that. However, don't avoid that. Don't avoid that, but it will be time that will heal it. It will be time. Time just heals everything. When you said again last week, you were saying when you put new music out, it was kind of the lowest you'd felt in another year.

What's the hardest part for you to take that criticism? Because like you said, you're quick with it. You've got responses. You've lived in a place where you had people coming at you. Why is it so hard to put out something you love? It seems like you've really put your heart. into your work. Yeah.

And so when you put that out, is that why the criticism hurts the most? Because you put so much heart and soul into your work? Yes, because I put like a lot. I always, I don't like what, like I'm not a lazy person. And I do understand my flaws. Well, it's not really my flaws because a lot of people will say something about my accent, right?

But it's funny because my accent to some people might be my flaw, but it's also my superpower and what makes me, Some people say that I have a Spanish accent, but I really don't really have a Spanish accent. I have a very unique accent. I talk very unique. When you try your best to perfect your accent, perfect your flows, perfect everything. I always try to perfect everything that I'm doing at the time. I was trying to perfect it. Like even when I was a stripper, like it's like, okay, I'm a stripper, but I'm going to be the best pole dancer in here. and I'm going to fucking bust my ass, bust my knees,

practice every day and to like to be the best at it. That's the same with music. I'm going to perfect it. That's the same with my marketing. I'm going to perfect it. That's the same with my business. I'm going to perfect it. I like to perfect things.

And if I'm not the best things, if I'm not the best at it, I could say that I tried to be and I work my ass off to be. And I didn't make it easy. for myself. So when people just throw it in your face and then make other narratives on top of it with that, it's like, that is so mean. And it's also like different narratives of you. Like it's like, wow, you don't even know me. You don't even know me. And you're making all these stories, scenarios, all this this, this over one song. Like, for example, when I did this song and people didn't like this song. So many people was like, they just, Cardi was,

Cardi never deserved to be a rapper. They just made it so easy for her. And it's funny because it's like, this shit was not given to me. I worked my ass off for me and I planned it. Just like you see, when I was a little girl used to plan everything. I plan every step, every single step. And I might even be inspirational to other artists coming up because for a long time, since I have such a big personality, people just felt like she's funny, she's funny, she's funny. So it was really hard for labels to take me serious. And some labels were trying to fucking give me scraps to do a slavering record deal. And even when I was on TV, and I thought that was going to be my big break for, like, people to recognize me as an artist. It wasn't. I was doing good

numbers on my mix tape. It wasn't enough. So the money that I was getting for partying and hostings, I took that money. I made my own concerts. And the best thing about it is that everything is documenting. I did my own concerts. For 500 to 400 people in New York, 800 people came out singing my songs, and I went to a label, and I was like, this is why you need to sign me. It's not just fucking Instagram. It is real life. And the $15,000 that I used to get for hosting parties, I used it to rent cars, rent buses, rent venues, to perform my songs, to show these labels like, it's like, I'm the one. This shit ain't fake

This shit ain't a personality thing This ain't a love and hip hop thing This is what my music is doing This is the people singing it And doing all of that And now being this far After you plan everything And people will tell you that

You don't deserve it And you got it because of this, this and that That pisses me the fuck off Because everything Everything that I did is documented this shit wasn't given to me I didn't open my legs for it neither

so that's the type of shit that would be getting me angry like it's like don't tell me that I didn't put the fucking work in when I put the work in there's days that I miss I miss birthdays I miss birthdays I miss family events

this shit has gotten in the way of like my personal relationships marriage and everything just for somebody to tell me somebody that never did shit in their motherfuck And I don't deserve it, put the fuck out of here. Absolutely. I mean, you know what, though?

I also find that Instagram and TikTok or whatever platform it is, the comments that are negative are just loud. Because you can literally go to someone's comment section and see negativity or whatever. But then, like you said, you go to an arena and everyone in the arena screaming their name and singing their songs. And so it is this really weird thing that happens for the mind where you're watching your page

or you're watching yourself and someone else's page and there's criticism but then actually there's all these other people that love you. The negativity and the hate is just so loud and people say stuff. Whereas the people that love you

they just press the heart, right? So it's always like that weird thing where I'm like, the mind just overvalues negative feedback and undervalues the positive feedback because the negative feedback is just so critical and loud and heavy. When you reflect on it

and after you think about it for a week do you think I want to prove them wrong or do you go actually who cares about them where do you end up after a week of reflecting on it like last week right I was in tears and I was telling myself I was telling myself like it's like not only myself I told this to my friend actually I told it to my friend I was like sometimes people say don't let the devil win but what happens if you let the devil win. Maybe I need to let the devil win so I can have a peace of mind. And then I'm like, thinking to myself, like, why the fuck would I ever say let the devil

win? Imagine praying to God on your feet knees every single night asking God, God, please bless me with this. God, please give me that. God, please give me this. Please give me that. Please bless me with this. Please bless me with that.

just so you could like everything that God gave you tell the devil here you can have it because he's sending sometimes the devil sends evil in human forms and human mouths and humans tongue just so you could tell the devil to have it like imagine how God feels imagine God be like all right baby all right girl

here you here here have this you wanted this here, here's what you get. And then like, it's like, it's like, he's giving you something. And then you go to school and they be like, that's ugly. And that's something that you've been asking for a long time. And now you don't like it because somebody told you that it's ugly. Yeah, well said. And it's like, how almost that the devil win?

And I was telling myself that. I was telling myself that. And like I said, I was telling it. But sometimes you got to believe it from the heart because your mind could tell you it. your mouth could say it, but you gotta believe it from the heart. This week, though, I feel so much better and I feel so much confident

and I was like, I'm not gonna let the devil win. I'm not gonna be like, you know what? I was telling my team like, I was like, you know what? I just need some days off. And it's like, how the fuck are you gonna take some days off when your team been planning all of these, all of these things

that you had to do for your album rollout because of these people that are spewing things that the devil wants you to think of yourself. I almost let this motherfucker win. Don't let the devil win. Because how do you think God feel? How do you think God feel, Cardi?

Gave you all this shit you weren't asking for forever. Just so you could say that. That really pissed me off about myself because I can't believe I said that. Well, no, I think it's human. I mean, even as I'm listening to you, I'm thinking everyone will be relieved because, you know, when someone is confident and as bold as you are and as out. spoken as you are, which are all amazing qualities. The truth is, though, that we all have these human moments. Yeah. And it's not a weakness. It's natural for all of us to feel pain, to

experience sadness, to experience. And it humanizes you in a good way. It makes me feel like, oh, wow, if Cardi feels that, then, hey, I can feel that too, you know. If she goes through those days and she gets out of them and a week later, she's feeling better. And a year ago, she was in a real mess and she's feeling better, then maybe I can take something from that as well. I'm not a perfect person. I'm not a perfect person. And sometimes I'm a little bit misunderstood. How do you think you're misunderstood?

I don't even want to bring this up again, but it's like, I could tell you how I'm misunderstood. I actually got dragged for weeks because of this. So I made, this, I think I'm just a little misunderstood. Sometimes I could be, I don't have a, I'm not a dark, I'm not a dark, humor person. I'm not a dark humor person. But sometimes, like, my humor could be a little rough. And I feel like my humor could be a little rough because, like, you know, like I said, like boys in the Bronx, they will make really tough jokes on you. And then on top of that,

like it's like a family like mine, we're always cracking jokes on each other. Like, it's like like being Caribbean, Caribbean people, like if you're too skinny, they'll be like, girl, you shape like candle, like you shape like a fucking candle, just small like a fucking candle, like a white candle. Or like the Americans, like, when you shape like big from the top and small in the round, they're like, what is that mean? It's a certain type of yam. Okay, okay. And it's like, it's like, it's rude, but it's like, it's just something that is like people just joke around that it's just so naturally. So sometimes my jokes might be a little bit. Not for everybody. And when I make certain jokes, like, I made a joke the other day with my fans because they literally started the joke.

And then I continue the joke and because of the joke and I refuse to apologize for it, people was just saying that I'm just such a mean person, that I was trying to bully people, that I'm hurtful to people. But it's like I wasn't even trying to hurt nobody. My intent wasn't to hurt nobody. It's just like everybody naturally jokes with their friends. Everybody naturally jokes with their peers. Everybody just might say not the most nicest jokes or stuff like that. However, like, I'm not trying to hurt nobody. I don't want to hurt nobody.

And so many people criticize me because of that or, like, judge my character because of that. But it's like, I'm not this evil, mean person that people think that I am. I'm very actually compassionate. I'm too compassionate. That's why I cry for, there's something that might be going on in the other side of the world. I'm crying for it. And it's like, why am I crying for this? Like, this is crazy.

I'm very compassionate and I'm very understanding. And I'm a Libra, so I see always two sides of the scale. I always have sympathy just a little. I even have sympathy for bitches. I have sympathy for bitches that my man and they have taken a family loss. I'm like, damn, I feel bad for her. That's how sympathetic I am. Why do you feel sympathy for them?

Like, where does that come from? or what do you feel? I don't know, it's just how you're made. That's just how I made or stuff like. That's just how I am. However, people just have this thought of me

and that's because my mouth is so rough. Like, I'm a little rough and I curse like a sailor. And I give advice very strong. But everybody in my family give advice very strong. And I don't have yes men's neither. so my friends will give me advice in the most rudest way

that it's like damn bitch do you like me but it's the truth and that's just how I am that's how I'm going to talk to you and that's just how I am because it's the truth and you're like that with everyone it doesn't change for anyone and I'm like that with everyone how about the kids oh I'm like that I'm like that with my kids too like oh god damn it I'm tired

But you can tell me I'm a bad mom. I'm a great mom. If I'm good at something as being a mom. But sometimes I'd be like, get the, you little, get the fuck. God damn, I'm sick of you. But that's just how I talk. Yeah, yeah. Does that make me a bad mom?

I don't think I'm a bad mom. Shit, I give them too much to be a bad mom. It's funny you say that. I was talking to a parenting expert on the podcast a few weeks ago. and she was saying that parenting is the most inconvenient thing. She goes, you love them, but they're inconvenient. Like, it's hard, like, if you're honest about it. Oh, yeah.

There's a real feeling about how tough being a mom is. How do you balance being a superstar and being a mom? Like, how do you make it? You said it yourself, you want to be the best to everything. When you do something, you want to be the best of it. So I assume that applies to being a mom too. Yeah. And so it's like, how do you do that?

What is it to you? What makes you a great mom? What are the parts that you focus on? And how do you balance those two crazy worlds? I think that what makes me, I think that what makes me like a good mom, I don't give my kids, it's not that I give my kids everything, but they just think I'm so funny. Like, even when I curse at them, they just think I'm so funny.

And it's like, I'm being serious with y'all, but they just love me. I don't know why they, I mean, of course I know why they love me, but it's like, why y'all love me so much? I guess I have a good mom because they love me so much they just think I'm so entertaining they think I'm so fun even when we're just laying in bed

they just want to lay in bed with me ain't no target we ain't going on the goddamn target we ain't going to fucking target to ask me for no goddamn Roblox that's exactly how don't come in here

asking me for no goddamn Roblox you ask me one more time for a fucking iPad for one of your cousins we're gonna have a problem this is exactly how I talk to my kids

and they still love me they just love me I don't know They love me for who I am. They love me. I don't even know how to explain it. I do give them everything, though. But not giving them everything doesn't always make you the greatest mom because it's like you've seen cases where like the parents work so hard.

They give their kids, everything and it's not enough. Like them two brothers, what's they call again? Oh, yeah, the Menendez brother. Yeah, you could give them everything, but if they don't love you, they just don't love you. And I don't know, they just love me. I just always remind them that I love them. But I will curse them out, though. and AI power performance.

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I just think the process and the journey is so delicious. That's where all the good stuff is. You just can't live and die by the end result. It's scary putting yourself out there, especially when it's something you really care about and something that you hope is your passion in life and you want people to like it. Let's get delicious and put ourselves out there.

I'm Simone Boyce, host of the Bright Side, and those were my recent guests, comedian Phoebe Robinson and writer Aaron Foster. On this show, I'm talking to the brightest minds in entertainment, health, wellness, and pop culture. And every week, we're going places in our communities, our careers, and ourselves. It's not about being perfect.

It's about going on a journey and discovering the bright side of becoming. Few people know that better than soccer legend Ashlyn Harris. It's the journey. It's the people. It's the failures. It's the heartache. It's the little moment. These are our moments to laugh, learn, and exhale. So join me every Monday. And let's find the bright side together. Listen to the bright side on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

The risks they took would be unthinkable to any doctor today. But odds are, someone you know is alive because of them. Welcome to the Wild West of American Medicine. I'm Chris Pine, and this is Cardiac Cowboys, a podcast that tells the gripping true story behind the birth of open heart surgery and the maverick surgeons who made it happen. It changed the way we live. It changed the life expectancy of people throughout the world.

world. I should be dead. The repair that he did when I was six years old saved me. A rag-tag group of surgeons united by a common mission. Some appeared on the cover of Time magazine, operated on Kings and advised presidents. Others ended up disgraced, penniless, convicted of felonies. Together, they ignited a revolution in medicine. It's as if a man landed on the moon and nobody even told the story, except this is more important. Listen to the cardiac cowboys. Boys podcast starting February 6th on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. please don't be lazy. Some people are some people have the look, the intelligent, the talent. Some people really have that. But they don't go nowhere because you're lazy. Don't be lazy.

Don't just be all your parents are this and that. No, be your own person. Be your own human. Be something. Be something that you could be proud of. my mom she was not she was she was a lunch lady practically but i am very proud of my mom because she used to work her ass off she could have went to my grandma like i i'm going through a tough time right now can you raise my kids for a year or two she never did that my my grandmothers as well one of them got 10 kids the other one got 13 kids they work every day my grandma from my dad's she gave birth on her kids in her wooden house

and then a couple of days later she working back in the farm and she brought all her kids to America one by one different time same with my grandma for my mom's side she had 13 kids she used to cook, cook, cook, cook

sell food, sell food, sell food she brought all her 13 kids over here like there's no excuse but I could say that because they did that and you're going to be able to say that about me like it's like my mom worked every day I seen my mom work every day. Be that.

Be that. One day you're going to have kids one day and you want your kids to say that about you. That you worked hard every day. Everything you got, you deserved it, that you made it. Nobody gave it to you. You don't want to be like, oh, you're just successful because you're a whole man.

Like I have son. I have a son. You don't want nobody said that you fly and you fire because you're somebody's son. No, I'm fly because you're somebody's son. No, I'm fly because. I'm my own man. I made myself a man.

I work my ass off. You won't have a bitch one day. You don't want your bitch to be like, oh, he a mama boy, he a daddy's good. No. I'm a hardworking man, baby, girl. You can't fucking. Same with my daughters.

You know, they're going to roll you over because you got your own shit. You're more than just a pretty face. Be a boss. Be something. Please, I don't give a fuck. What they do, whatever the f***. Just do not have that lazy bone on you.

Ain't no way that I'm busting my ass for you, motherfuckers, just so you could end up not being shit. I'm giving y'all everything, even when they're 18 and stuff like that and it's time to leave, if you want an apartment, if you want a car, I'll give it to you. But please, please become something. Please don't be nothing. That would be the worst disappointment they could have a deal.

Don't disappoint me like that. Whatever fuck I do, just don't be a nothing. If you give it to them, though, don't you think they'll be lazy then? Because if you give them an apartment and you give them a card, then they'll feel like, well, I don't need to work because mom's got me. No, because it's like, all right, for example, I went to college, right? But I had to drop out of college because I had to work to just feed myself. If you got a crib and if you could maneuver to,

to college or you probably want to open up a business or something. If you can maneuver and you don't got to worry about a bill, then it becomes easier for you. But don't make me give you an apartment or a fucking car and you're just out here not doing shit. I better every single time I FaceTime you, you better be my fucking doing something. If you're in bed at fucking 12 p.m., yeah.

Ain't that car under my name? Oh, it's coming with me. You need the real world And don't go to your daddy You know Let me go into your fucking daddy I would take the shit away I don't play that

You ain't gonna be nothing Yeah you're clear about that You got two feet You got two hands You got a brain You better do some shit Yeah for sure I found like I started working when I was 14

I used to deliver newspapers at the time And then I started working at grocery store. I used to work at the back and stack the shelves, pick up all the palettes, bring all the goods in, work back of house. And then I worked and sold jeans at some jeans shop. It's like, I found working since I was 14 is what made me realize the value of work. And I've been working hard ever since. And it's, if I didn't start working hard at 14, I feel like, my parents didn't have anything to give me either. Yeah. But I feel like that work ethic has to start early. It do have to start early. And that's why, like, it's like, like, sometimes when,

my parents, here comes my parents sometimes. My parents, they be getting in my nerves sometimes. Like, they be getting on my fucking nerve sometimes. Because, like, my kids, they have school to 3 p.m., right? And after school, I don't care, and I don't want you at home talking about, like, I'm a little tough and shit. I don't give a fuck. This is what I work hard for.

After school, my kids, four times a week, they have tutoring, reading, math, whatever. They have tutoring mandatory in my house. Then, coach you have piano, or she got you. gym class. Wave, he got sports class, and he still got to do the tutoring. And I don't I'm, but I'm sleepy. I don't want to hear that shit. I don't want to hear

that shit. It's discipline, it got to be in you, and you have to be better than me. I want you to be better than me. There's things that I cannot do that I want my kids to do. I don't know how to swim. I would love to swim. But

the one time I went to a pool in Highbridge, There was a crazy fight that broke out. People was getting cut left to right. So I couldn't go swimming because I had no pool. If I have a pool, you're going to learn how to swim. You're going to take your swimming classes. I'm not really good with my feet.

So you're going to take dance classes because if you want to, if you ever want to be a superstar, that shit is going to be in you, that you are the answer. I want you to be smarter than me. Like, I could read down, but my grandma's not that great. I want you to be not perfect because you cannot make your kids perfect and you don't want you to put pressure on your kids perfect

but I want you to be a hundred times better version than me and I'm going to install that in you and you're going to be mad and you're going to be crying but you're going to appreciate that one day because I wish the things that I'll put on my kids that somebody put in me when I was younger but they couldn't put that in me when I was younger because they couldn't afford it

And they couldn't really have time to be like, Buckleys, Buckleys, Buckleys, Hennessy, Hennessy, Hennessy, because they had to work. I have to work, but I'm going to give you classes for it. Yeah. Grab me something, boy. Brought me something, girl. I'm playing with y'all.

I love it. I love it. Success is so much of who you are, it's who you breathe, it's what you do. What makes Cardi be happy? It's like little, little elements. Like, my kids make me very happy. They're just so cute and funny. Like, it's just, and they say stupid stuff.

Like, it's like... What do they say? Just things that is like, girl, what? It's funny. And it's funny seeing your kids grow and develop a little character. And I'm like, where my baby, she'd be hitting her brother, her sister. It'd be so funny to me because it's like a baby and she's... And they're just there taking it.

So to me, little things like that is funny. and makes me happy, romance, you know what I'm saying, when I'm, when I'm, when I'm in love and when we're having a good, you know, we're having a good week when you're showing that you care. That makes me happy. You know, actually, when I this saw a piece of an interview with Selena Gomez and you, when she said, I might have a 14-hour day and just one phone call, and when somebody's there for you, it's a good feeling. That's a good feeling as well. What else is a good feeling for me?

When I'm with my cousins, when I'm with my family, and we were just cracking jokes, and it just feels like, it feels like childhood. It makes me happy. Music make me very happy. I love music. When me and my team, we plan something, we put in so much work.

and it goes good, that makes me happy, that makes me happy, the team happy, and it motivates me and it motivates me and it motivates my team. And it's just like, we did it. So stuff like that, stuff like that makes me happy. Seeing all the work that you do and the time that you put, the process, the progress that you put, and it's like, it hits, it's successful, that makes you really happy. Like it's like, oh, thank God, thank you, Jesus. It makes you want to keep going.

Just like. That's a good list. Yeah. That's a good list. I like it. It's all connection. It's all real. It's human.

It's love. It's family. It's friends. It's intimacy. It's all the, it is all the most beautiful things that we're all looking for. Yeah. How do you see love now? Like, how do you define love?

Effort. It's not going to always be perfect. Effort is like a lot to me. It means a lot to me. Like calling me, studying me, personality as well. love me a joke. I love me a he-he-he. You know what I'm saying? Like, if you, if I come to you and I'm in tears, when was it last week? I saw, I saw my little boyfriend. I saw my boyfriend. And I was in tears. I was like, it's so much pressure on me. Like, it's so much pressure on me.

And just one little joke. Like, I'm in tears. I kind of forgot the joke, but it was so funny. That's good, that. And, like, it's not coming out. out of my nose and it's like it made me laugh. It just made me feel good and it's just like, you know what? Things are going to be okay. Yeah. Stuff like that. Someone you can, someone who can make you laugh, cry and someone who can be there for you

when you're crying real hard tears. Yeah. I like that. And I like effort. I like what you said, study you. Yeah. That was really interesting. Now, I've never heard that before, but I like it.

The idea that if someone loves you, they study you. What does that mean to you? Tell me about that. I like that one a lot. Certain things are just the obvious. You know what I'm saying? Like, certain things is like, are you. you're really studying me or it's just the obvious.

Like, for example, if you get me a purse, if you get me a Birkin or a Kelly, right? It makes me happy, of course. Like, who don't, who, which woman don't, or a bag make them happy? But you know that that's what I like. So it's not like you study it. It's like you see it on my page.

But like when you do things that you don't normally do, but you're doing it because you heard me talk about this. Like, like when you rent a cat, And I know you don't want to be in this old-ass castle that you literally got to go up and down the stairs just so you could pee and it's hot and there's no air conditioner. When you rent a castle out just so you could, just because you keep saying like, I can't wait, I can't wait to have a day off in Paris so I could go to Versailles. I'm obsessed with castles. I'm obsessed with kings. I'm obsessed with queens.

and it's like you listen to that and you like do your best to make it happen it's like little things like that yeah so you always leaving clues it's not even like leaving clues it's just like me talking about my this just be just you talking it's like it means stuff to me and stuff like that when you get to know my personality too and get to study me it's like okay because i'm i'm i'm a i think i'm a hard person figure out. Some people just see me and think certain things until you really get to figure me out and crack me. Because I might give you what I want to give you. You haven't cracked me yet. Will anyone ever crack you? Is it possible? Yeah. Little by little I open up and I show

more of myself. A real self. Yeah. It's been seven years. since you released new music and you've talked to me about releasing it the hard work that went into it the journey that got you there why you waited what finally made you feel confident that you had the right piece of work what did you put into it how did you know that now was the right time and the work was ready because it feels good it feels good like it's like this I feel like people are missing this it feels good I feel good I feel confident about it. I feel very confident about it, to be honest with you.

So that's where I'm like, it's time. Yeah. Where did the name, Am I the drama? What inspired that? What's the subtext? What's the hidden meanings behind it? I don't want to keep saying when I was a little girl. But it's funny.

Like it's like, say it. I love knowing that you manifested this. It's beautiful. No, because it's like ever since I was a little girl, I always get in trouble. And it don't really be me. Like, it's like, if we're having a sleepover, me and my cousins,

I would be the one that the aunt is pulling their ears. Because it's like, yeah, I know this was your idea. But it even was, it wasn't even my idea. Sometimes when I used to go to school and I used to fight, my mom used to be like, then I tell you to avoid the fight. And it's like, Mom, I swear to God, it's not me. It's these girls. They keep trying me.

That's why I keep getting into fights. And when I was in school, too, like, it's like, when I do get in trouble just because I'm being mischievous, it's like, like my friend's moms used to be like, it's because of her, it's because of Belcalis. I know it's her. And it's like, it don't really be me. It really don't be me. And that's just how it is with my life. Like, it's like, yo, I'm always in a scandal. I'm always in some bullshit.

I'm always in some beef. And it's like, no matter how much I avoid it, it comes to me. Am I the fucking drama? Isn't me, Jesus? Isn't me? No matter how much I avoid it, no matter how much I think I'm in a bubble and it's like, nope, that bubble is always going to pop.

Something's always going to find you, girl. But that's why I like, am I the drama? Why am I always in some shit? Whether it's good or bad, why am I always in some shit? What's the answer? Am I? That's the

The answer is still the question. Am I? Am I? Only one person can answer that. And that's Jesus. Because God, why the fuck am I always in some shit? When is the fucking boat going to start smooth sailing? Why are we always in the ocean, in the middle of the ocean?

And the roughest, we're in the, We're in the Pacific Ocean all the time. I love that. It's a great question. It's a great question. It lines up for a great album. It's such a great name. It's such a great energy.

Even just hearing you talk about it is such a great vibe. What's the, I mean, how does it feel when that drama gets televised? And then it's all over TikTok. How does that feel? Nope. Sometimes it's good. Sometimes it's bad. You always show up looking fabulous, but I'm like,

How does that feel when like, you know? Well, I try to come in here having eyes like you, but one of the contacts wasn't cooperating. So I'm like, I'm not taking this other contact off. So that's why we have the... Yeah, that's why we got three blue eyes on set instead of it. I love it. I love it.

So... How does it feel when your drama is televised? Like when that is televised? How does that feel? It just feels, sometimes it feels okay because there's going to be people that's going to cheer for you and sometimes it's going to be very overwhelming and very stressful, very annoying.

And then it's like, unlike other celebrities, you know, a lot of people would be wanting me to be like certain celebrities and stuff like that. Oh, really? Like who? Like they just want me to be like the type of person that just don't respond, that don't tell my feelings. and they be thinking that some of these celebrities, like, they're perfect, which they are

amazing, but don't think they're not going through what I'm going through. Don't think they don't feel like what the pressure that I go through. Don't think they're not saying, yeah, I hate you, motherfucker, because what if you think you think you are to tell me that I'm this, this, this, who do you think you this and that? I'm just a person that tells it. So it's a blessing and a curse because sometimes I feel like I speak for them. And that's why when a lot of celebrities see me, they'd be like, yo, you be saying what I want to say. That's cool.

But then sometimes it's like a curse because sometimes people be like, it's like, oh, you're the only one that do that. You're the only one that do that. And it's like, well, I'll be the one that do that. Yeah. I can't do it all the time, though, because then people are going to think I'm just crazy. But I'll be the one to do that Y'all need to leave fucking people alone Y'all think because that's a celebrity

We make a little money And we make a little this Like it's like bitch I have feelings too ho I ain't no chopped liver So Maybe that's why I'm sometimes Like the punching bags

And sometimes people be like You need to stop doing that You need to stop being this You need to be more like them And it's like they feel the same way I feel too They want to tell these people Fuck ya

you and your mom and your dad and your whole bloodline how the fuck you're talking on me fuck you trust me they want to say that they want to say that

I think everyone does but I'll be the one to say it but that's because sometimes it do feel good to say it fuck you bitch fuck you I'll be the one Yeah.

Not all the time, but I'll be the one. Yeah. Yeah, I could see that from all the clips that I've seen. Like, you're always yourself. Like, you're never not yourself, wherever you are. The glam, the looks, the fashion, the wigs, the everything that comes out of your mouth. It's like you're never filtering yourself, no matter the environment you're in. I'll trust me.

I filter myself a lot. Oh, you do? Sometimes I feel like, who the fuck am I? Who the fuck have I become? Because I used to have no filters. Now it's just like, I'm like, all right. But still fuck you, though. Where do you feel to yourself, if you ever do?

Where do you feel to yourself? This mouth, I could be a piranha. What are we today? A shark? No, today's... No, today I'm a goldfish. Okay, today you're a goldfish. I said nothing bad today.

Today I'm a goldfish. No, no, no. I'd be really nice today. You have been wonderful. But it's like sometimes I'd be seeing people and I'd be like, I could get really nasty. Just all facts, I could get really nasty. But you hold back sometimes.

But I hold back so much. I hold back so much, so much, so much, so much, so much. I really, you know what? I really did change a lot. I don't know what changed me. Maybe the age. Maybe the kids. Maybe life.

You softened out. bit? I always been soft, but I could really give it to you. And I won't stop, but I stop. Just for, hmm. Is it the age? Is the kids? Which one is it? All of them? All of the above. It's a combination. Age really whizzing you. Wising you and make you afraid. Yeah. Got more to lose. I think that plays a big part. When you're young, and you're dreaming and you want all these things, no one ever tells you the cost that it comes at. Yeah. And how much it tests you and brings all sorts of other challenges into your life. Yeah. Yeah. You've talked about how money doesn't fix everything and success doesn't

solve everything. And it almost feels like when you don't have those things, you think it will. Yeah. And then when you get it, you realize, oh, wait, there's all this other stuff that we haven't figured out yet. Oh, come on. Why is this taking so long? This thing is ancient. Still using yesterday's tech, upgrade to the ThinkPad X1 Carbon, ultra-light, ultra-powerful, and built for serious productivity.

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so you can work, create, and boost productivity all on one device. It may look different, but native culture is very alive. My name is Nicole Garcia, and on Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we aim to explore that culture. It was a huge honor to become a television writer because it does feel oddly, like, very traditional. It feels like Bob Dylan going electric, that this is something we've been doing for the hundreds of years.

You carry with you a sense of purpose and confidence. That's Sierra Taylor Ornelis, who with Rutherford Falls became the first native showrunner in television history. On the podcast, Burn Sage, Burn Bridges, we explore her story, along with other native stories, such as the creation of the first Native Comic-Con or the importance of reservation basketball. Every day, native people are striving to keep traditions alive while navigating the modern world,

influencing and bringing our culture into the mainstream. Listen to Burn Sageburn Bridges on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Kurt Brown-Oller. And I am Scotty Landis, and we host Bananas, the Weird News Podcasts with wonderful guests like Whitney Cummings. And tackle the truly tough questions. Why is cool mom an insult, but mom is fine? No. I always say, Kurt, it's a fun dad.

Fun dad and cool mom. That's cool for me. We also dig into important life stuff. Like, why our last names would make the worst hyphen ever. My last name is Cummings. I have sympathy for nobody. Yeah, mine's brown-oller, but with an H. So it looks like brown-holer.

Okay, that's, okay, yours might be worse. We can never get married. Yeah. Listen to this episode with Whitney Cummings. and check out new episodes of bananas every Tuesday on the exactly right network. Listen to bananas on the IHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What is something that you are still trying to figure out, learn, solve in your own life? What's the part of your life?

You're like working on dreaming, envisioning, imagining, imagining to be better and different. I mean, life in general. All of it. All of it, to be honest with you. Life just doesn't get... I wonder what life is going to start getting easier. Because life is just hard. No matter if you have money or not.

You got problems when you poor. You got problems where you're rich. You're always just trying to figure it. Every single day, I feel. people are just trying to figure it out, trying to figure themselves out, trying to figure life out, and it just will never stop. It will never stop, I think. When you're through, it would stop when you're 60, but even when you're 60, you're going

to start having other problems, like back problems. And it's like another thing, another problem that you've got to figure out. You know what I'm saying? Like it's like, it's just, it would never stop. Yeah. The older you get, the more people you lose, more kids you have, the more things you have to worry about. The more money you have, the more.

You have to learn about managing. You have a partner or where you don't have a partner. You've got to figure out how you want to deal with being alone. When you have a partner, it's like how you've got to figure out how to be their peace and everything. And I really don't want people thinking either that it's like just because you have money. Like it's like you live the easy life. Everybody that they have money that are successful, that are good, how will they do, If you notice a pattern, they work their asses off.

The thing that Beyonce got a fucking boat in a mansion and this and that because she's just, Beyonce? No, she worked her ass off. She's one of the most hardest people ever. Why people cannot go to her level? Why people can't this and that? Because she just have an insane work ethic, insane time. And my partner, he works up every day at 5.30, 6 a.m.

and leave work at 7 p.m. And then you got people that hate on him and it's like, well, why he's so good? Because he works hard. Why am I here after seven years? Because I'm every day, every day, working every day, what we're doing next? Hello, what's y'all doing?

Wake up. I got a certain plan. I just thought of something. I just had a dream or something. We got to make it happen. And working hard, you could say working hard and it sounds like working hard, but it's like it's hours and hours, it's time, it's body, his brain.

I mean, I'm exhausted. I'm really exhausted right now. Back hurt, butt hurt. I'm sleepy as shit. I got a headache on the right side of my head when I'm working. After this, I got to do a promo shoot, and then I'm going to the studio, and then tomorrow I got to do something else. Every single day, every single day, every single day.

If you want it, you got to do it. You're no complaining, no crying, shit. in this conversation you've talked about Jesus you talked about the devil do you talk to God a lot do you pray every day every day I feel like I have a very deep spiritual connection with God and it's not even like about praying it's like talking like even when I talk to God I talk to him just like I'm talking to you I be cursing I love that crying because people are like oh cursing is bad but it's like, God knows who I am. God knows who I am. God knows how I be.

Like, it's like it's almost like I'm talking to a friend. And I really do believe in my weird mind, in my weird universe that I made, like I have angels. I really do believe that God gave me angels. And I believe in them. I feel like God is here, and I feel like you got your angels here, then you got your other religions here. I believe in God so much.

It's not even funny. And, you know, some people might not believe in God, but it's like, don't try. Like, it's like, I'm not going to convince nobody to believe in what I believe in. But if it, how you expect me not to believe on the person that I've been praying to my whole life and gave me what I wanted? So that little girl was talking to God in that dreams? Always, all the time. it's like the imaginary friend the voice in your head do you think is your friend do you think is your your your voice

that's just that was just you talking to God the whole time that's just you talking to God the whole time I love him I believe in him I always tell this to somebody like it's like the most the most the most I could give you the most powerful thing that I could give you is me praying on you if I pray on you for you it's because I love you it's the most powerful as thing.

And I do feel like when you pray together, miracles happen. I love him. I love you so much. Why do you love me so much? Why do you love you so much? Say everybody. I'm like one of your favorite kids. Tell them.

Jesus, Lord told these people. I'm one of your favorites. I'm a lot of them. That's beautiful. Cardi, you've been so generous with your time. energy, your heart. I really felt, you know, this surpassed every one of my expectations that I had of meeting you and getting to interview you. I knew there was so much spirit. I knew there was so much soul. I knew there was just this energy inside that I'm really grateful you let share today

and people get to know you a bit more deeply. We end every episode with a final five. These questions have to be answered in one word to one sentence maximum. So Cardi B, these are your final five. You know I talk a lot. I know. You can. You think I'll get to answer with one word. I'm giving you permission.

You can. Yeah, okay. All right. So question number one, we ask these to every guest who's been on the show. What is the best advice you've ever heard or received? Well, I'm going to go with one advice that I heard today. No, I didn't heard it today. I heard it yesterday.

Ask the difficult questions. The difficult questions. make the relationship stronger it could break it it could make it but you still have a understanding if you become that understanding then yeah might become stronger

you said it better you said it better whoever said it you said it better question number two what is the worst advice you've ever heard or received I think you've heard a lot sometimes when somebody told me to wear a certain outfit

or is when somebody told me to drop a certain songs, you never know. You could go from here to that. Question number three, finish the sentence. One thing I'll never apologize for is. My mouth, I mean, maim, and maim, my mouth. Well, sometimes I'm going to apologize for my mouth. Sometimes I might, maybe I'm a little too hard. I don't know.

I apologize for my mouth sometimes, but not all the time. Question number four, what's something that you used to? to value that you don't value anymore? I happen to have like the streets. I value it a lot and I don't. I value it because it made me and they gave me a certain mentality. But I wouldn't want to advise that to people that I love,

people that I care, or to young kids, to young boys, to young girls. Because it don't always lead you to where you think is going to lead. you. It's very grimy. Don't love you back. Ever. And fifth and final question, we ask this to every guest who's been on the show. If you could create one law that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be? If I was Kim Jong-Nu-Li, what law? I'm not sure. I got to come back to that. Yeah, think about it.

Matter of fact, if you hurt children, you got to get, what's that thing when they clip you? cash size, whatever it's called. You just got to be clipped. And if you're a woman, they need to burn it. Oh, wow. If you hurt kids. Wow. Yeah, that should be a mandatory thing all over the world.

Wow. Because kids are so precious. They're so precious. They're so innocent. Well, some of them are kind of evil. They're born with the devil inside. You see documentary. Some of them are saying, you was born to die.

You was born to be a devil. Jesus. Jesus upon you, child. Cardi B, everyone. The album is called Am I the Drama. I'm so excited for everyone to hear it. Love your energy, love your spirit. So grateful to have spent this time together.

Thank you. And all the best. God bless. And I hope that you continue to succeed and win at life and keep being the energy and force that you are. So thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you.

If you love this episode, you'll really enjoy my episode with Selena Gomez on befriending your inner critic and how to speak to yourself with more compassion. My fears are only going to continue to show me what I'm capable of. The more that I face my fears, the more that I feel I'm gaining strength,

I'm gaining wisdom, and I just want to keep doing that. In the heat of battle, your squad relies on you. Don't let them down. Unlock elite gaming tech at Lenovo.com. Dominate every match with next level speed, seamless streaming, and performance that won't quit.

So you can push your gameplay beyond performance with Intel Core Ultra processors. For the next era of gaming, upgrade to smooth high-quality streaming with Intel Wi-Fi 6E and maximize game performance with enhanced overclocking. Win the tech search. Power up at Lenovo.com. Welcome to the U versus U podcast. Barrero, inviting you to go beyond the titles and the accolades of the world's most successful entertainers. Each week, we take off the Cape and get real about the inner battles, childhood stories, and the moments that shaped our guests. Get inspired to become the best version of

you. Listen to You vs. You podcast on the Iheart radio app or wherever you get your podcast. The Super Secret Festi Club podcast season four is here. And we're locked in. That means more juicy chisement. Terrible love advice. Evil spells to cast on your ex. No, no, no, we're not doing that this season. Oh, well, this season we're leveling up. Each episode will feature a special Bestie, and you're not going to want to miss it. My name is Curley.

And I'm Maya. Get in here! Listen to the Super Secret Bestie Club on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. This is an IHeart podcast.