On Purpose with Jay Shetty - Daniella Monet: ON Body Image, Eating Disorders and Self Love

Episode Date: March 11, 2019

Daniella’s candor in this episode is amazing.She opens up about her personal struggles with family, body image, finding purpose, learning to love herself, and shows us how she’s been able to use t...he negative experiences in her life to inspire people around the world.We discuss why it’s the day to day grind, and work put into personal relationships that sets us up for success, rather than the social media milestones.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Regardless of the progress you've made in life, I believe we could all benefit from wisdom on handling common problems. Making life seem more manageable, now more than ever. I'm Eric Zimmer, host of the One You Feed Podcast, where I interview thought-provoking guests who offer practical wisdom that you can use to create the life you want. 25 years ago, I was homeless and addicted to heroin. I've made my way through addiction recovery, learned to navigate my clinical depression, and figured out how to build a fulfilling life. The one you feed has over 30 million downloads and was named one of the best podcasts by Apple Podcast.
Starting point is 00:00:33 Oprah Magazine named this is one of 22 podcasts to help you live your best life. You always have the chance to begin again and feed the best of yourself. The trap is the person often thinks they'll act once they feel better. It's actually the other way around. I have had over 500 conversations with world-renowned experts and yet I'm still striving to be better.
Starting point is 00:00:56 Join me on this journey. Listen to the one you feed on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Brendan Francis Nuneum. I'm a journalist, a wanderer, and a bit of a bon vivant, but mostly a human just trying to figure out what it's all about. And not lost is my new podcast about all those things.
Starting point is 00:01:15 It's a travel show where each week I go with a friend to a new place and to really understand it, I try to get invited to a local's house for dinner where kind of trying to get invited to a dinner party, it doesn't always work out. Ooh, I'll have to get back to you. Listen to Not Lost on the iHeart radio app or wherever you get your podcasts. The world of chocolate has been turned upside down. A very unusual situation.
Starting point is 00:01:39 You saw the stacks of cash in our office. Chocolate comes from the cacao tree, and recently, variety of cacao fought to have been lost centuries ago. We're rediscovered in the Amazon. There is no chocolate on Earth like this. Now some chocolate makers are racing deep into the jungle to find the next game-changing chocolate. And I'm coming along. Okay, that was a very large crack it up.
Starting point is 00:02:00 Listen to the obsessions of wild chocolate on the i On the iHeart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Create before you consume. I think that that's a really good tool to go about because creating something that can have its own trickle effect makes you feel like you're part of a bigger purpose, consuming social media,
Starting point is 00:02:23 unless you're using it purposefully, can really weigh on you. Make sure you've subscribed, rated and reviewed. It means so, so much to me. The podcast has been getting huge, huge support and I'm so grateful to each and every one of you. Now, the way I met today's guest is really, really interesting.
Starting point is 00:02:45 I turned up to a food tasting at a vegan bacon company in LA, right? Like, that's something you'll only ever hear in LA. But it's a vegan bacon company. It's made out of mushrooms. It's absolutely incredible. It's called outstanding foods. And I happen to be invited for a tasting
Starting point is 00:03:02 with one of their incredible investors, and incredible ambassadors. Her name is Daniella Monet. She's an actress, she's an activist and on top of all of that she's an incredible human. Daniella speaks openly and vulnerably about her personal challenges. Her journey with her family talks about her activism with so much passion. She's so kind, she's so giving, she's so loving,
Starting point is 00:03:27 has so much talent, but an even bigger heart. I'm so grateful to call her a meaningful friend. This one is going to blow your mind. Welcome, Daniela Mono. I just want to get to the heart of how you're able to do it, because I think for a lot of people listening, they want to be more comfortable being alone. They want to be able to create their own version of success,
Starting point is 00:03:56 not be dictated by the one that's been brought about by their parents or society or their industry. How did you do that? Oh my goodness. I think it stems from the initial feeling of being uncomfortable and knowing that you just don't want to be in that space for very long, so you start to look for resources
Starting point is 00:04:15 to help you get out of being uncomfortable. I'd say from a young age, I was very independent. I had a great family and I had a great upbringing as a whole, but there was a lot of unstable elements. My parents were not a good ideal marriage. I guess scenario growing up, I didn't see what marriage and what like a compatible relationship really looked like. And I learned to, at that point, sort of take control of my own life and taking care of my brother, make sure that I always made money.
Starting point is 00:04:52 I was a little kid hustler. It was really weird if I think back to the things that I was doing, like making clothes, selling clothes, rhinestone, anything that was popular at the time, I learned to do it very quickly. People wanted braids, people wanted their ears pierced. I was like all over the place. Okay, when I think about it, I'm like,
Starting point is 00:05:10 just to make school lunch, you know, like money for lunch or when I was vegan, I had to buy my own groceries, so I learned like, okay, I'm having a garage sale this weekend because I wanna get follow your heart mail. This, you know what I mean? Like, everything was like one for one, and I learned that it wasn't going to happen on its own. So regardless of my upbringing and sort of the chaos
Starting point is 00:05:32 that was going on at home, which at the time I thought was normal, and which is even more weird. I knew it was weird, and I knew it was uncomfortable, and I knew that they weren't a good fit for one another, but I accepted it, and I sort of became my own adult at a young age. Meanwhile, I'm acting.
Starting point is 00:05:51 I'm in an adult world. I didn't go to high school. I really wasn't even in middle school for very often. I was on a series at the time. I was the only kid on the show. So I went to school in a trailer, a tiny trailer, just me, and this incredibly political teacher that wanted to push every election on this like 14, 15-year-old kid,
Starting point is 00:06:11 so learn a little about that and whatnot to do. And I think one of the things I learned very quickly was, like I said, I had control over certain things. So I started to control what I ate to a point where it was unhealthy, did go through an eating disorder while being on a show. I've never really admitted that, but yeah, I dropped down significantly. I mean, I must have been at one point my lowest 15, 16 years old, 70, something pounds.
Starting point is 00:06:42 I was on a CBS series, so the network was not happy. And in order to piece them, they did so much to try and help. They made sure that I had tons of vegan food and smoothies. They made sure I was going to meetings in the morning. I was so confused. I didn't think I had a problem. I wasn't being honest with myself. I was trying to sort of cope with being very quickly emerged into an adult world while knowing that I had a brother who was sort of still in the home scenario that wasn't healthy and wanted to help him
Starting point is 00:07:19 and wanted to help my family and realize that like I need to be making a lot of money because money is going to help all of this and so the drive was on another level. And having control over the things that I could, which was food and working out and staying as busy as I could and being as motivated as I could really drove me to skin and bones. But I saw the light pretty quickly and I'm going to be so honest about that. I'm so grateful that I have this consciousness in me where I don't need to go down a rabbit hole very long to learn that the bottom is up. And I learned that I had no choice
Starting point is 00:08:00 but to be healthy. And that's where I started to talk more about health. And that's when I really started to lean on what I was and what gave me purpose and what made me happy. And speaking up for animals and taking jobs that I knew were positive and fun and interesting and not dark and deep and too far stretch from the imagination was what I wanted to do. I became very selective and what I worked on.
Starting point is 00:08:27 I then ended up on Nickelodeon, therefore, because I knew that that's family-friendly, that's happy, that's colorful, that makes me feel good. Like, I'm getting in the lives of children, which, like, for me, that's a game-changer. I love children, I think they're obviously the future, and I want to have a significant role in their lives. I took being on Nickelodeon so seriously that I knew being a role model
Starting point is 00:08:54 meant everything to me. I'm a big sister, I'm the oldest of my cousins and being on a show where I knew kids were watching meant that I had a position in their lives, that I was someone that they could look up to, and so that's been really powerful. And to this day, I still have young kids, teens, adults, that group watching me on the last 12 years of being on Nickelodeon come up to me and have nice things to say.
Starting point is 00:09:23 And I just wanna keep that trajectory going. That's really up to me and and have nice things to say and I just want to keep that trajectory going. That's really important to me. That's amazing that you see it as a responsibility almost because you know that people are watching you, people are seeing you as a role model. As I said earlier, this show for me is really to talk to real models, people who can express their reality and people who I think are real models for the world to follow. You're definitely one of them in so many areas of your life. But I think it's really special that you took it as a responsibility because I think it's so easy at that age to be on a chlodeon, to have fame, to have success, and to just enjoy it.
Starting point is 00:10:01 Like it's like, why do you even need to care about anyone else because you've worked hard to get there? But it seems like you've always just had this responsibility in your life. Yeah. Yeah, it's weird because sometimes I wish that I had a little bit more of that because I find myself wanting to help so much along the way and wanting to get to a certain place so that I could help more people that I don't celebrate the small victories in the timeline. You know, like I just kind of know that there's so many people and so many animals and so many resources and the planet. I mean, you could go down forever, right? Like you can think about.
Starting point is 00:10:38 And I think for me, one of the things that is always in the back of my head is my family and the people that sort of suffer with things in my family. My brother who feels like he's almost like my own child, he suffers with addiction and has been homeless for probably on and off for about a year or two. Sorry. I've never actually like spoke about it. So that for me to see that in my own four walls and like the closest thing to me, the kid who I mean he slept in my room, the majority of my life. He had his own bedroom, but he slept in my room on a trendle bed because I feel like I was like his safety net.
Starting point is 00:11:28 So I've learned that I want to be that, because I know that I have that capability, and I want to be that for more people. I could be that for him, and I could do as much as I possibly can, but I want to help people before they get to a place where it's harder to make a change. So I've really tried to make that a big goal of mine. Yeah, and in a big way. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:53 I think, thank you for sharing that, my man. Our 20s are seen as this golden decade. Our time to be carefree, full in love, make mistakes, and decide what we want from our life. But what can psychology really teach us about this decade? I'm Gemma Speg, the host of the Psychology of Your 20s. Each week we take a deep dive into a unique aspect of our 20s, from career anxiety, mental health, heartbreak, money, friendships, and much more, to explore the science and the psychology behind our experiences, incredible guests, fascinating topics, important science, and a bit of my own personal experience.
Starting point is 00:12:38 Audrey, I honestly have no idea what's going on with my life. Join me as we explore what our 20s are really all about, from the good, the bad, and the ugly, and listen along as we uncover how everything is psychology, including our 20s. The psychology of your 20s hosted by me, Gemma Speg. Now streaming on the iHotRadio app, Apple podcasts, or whatever, you get your podcasts. I'm Eva Longoria. I'm Maite Gomes-Rachon. We're so excited to introduce you to our new podcast, Hungry for History. On every episode, we're exploring some of our favorite dishes, ingredients, beverages from our Mexican culture.
Starting point is 00:13:18 We'll share personal memories and family stories, decode, culinary customs, and even provide a recipe or two for you to try at home. Corner flower. Both. Oh, you can't decide. I can't decide. I love both. You know, I'm a flower tortilla flower.
Starting point is 00:13:31 Your team flower? I'm team flower. I need a shirt. Team flower, team core. Join us as we explore surprising and lesser known corners of Latinx culinary history and traditions. I mean, these are these legends, right? Apparently, this guy Juan Mendes, he was making these tacos
Starting point is 00:13:46 wrapped in these huge thirdillas to keep it warm, and he was transporting them in a burro hence the name the burritos. Listen to Hungary for history with Ivalongoria and Maite Gomez Rejón as part of the Michael Tura podcast network available on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. A good way to learn about a place is to talk to the people that live there. There's just this sexy vibe and Montreal, this pulse, this energy.
Starting point is 00:14:13 What was meant is seen as a very snotty city. People call it Bosedangeless. New Orleans is a town that never forgets its pay. A great way to get to know a place is to get invited to a dinner party. Hi, I'm Brendan Friends' newton, and not lost as my new travel podcast, where a friend and I go places, see the sights, and try to finagle our way into a dinner party. We're kind of trying to get invited to a dinner party. It doesn't always work out.
Starting point is 00:14:38 I would love that, but I have like a Cholala who is aggressive towards strangers. I love the dogs. We learn about the places we're visiting, yes, but we also learn about ourselves. I don't spend as much time thinking about how I'm going to die alone when I'm traveling, but I get to travel with someone I love. Oh, see, I love you too. And also, we get to eat as much...
Starting point is 00:14:56 I love you too. My life's a lot of therapy goes behind that. You're so white, I love it. Listen to not lost on the iHeart radio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Yeah, thank you for being so open and vulnerable and just just sharing so so genuinely here because I don't think that you're someone that ever hides anything. I never feel that way. Like when I'm following you on Instagram or I see any of the content you're making, it's
Starting point is 00:15:23 just from the heart. It feels that way to me anyway. And when I'm hearing you today, I'm actually loving learning about you even more because it's only making me appreciate everything else you do. Thank you. And it's crazy because I align with so much of what you're saying in my own life. So my sister's nickname that I've given her as kid. It's actually her as my kid like my child. So it's so funny that you said that way, your brother. And similarly, now, parents, I felt I mediated my parents' marriage growing up. So I can definitely resonate with that.
Starting point is 00:15:55 And then I resonate with something else. I'm listening to you and I'm just saying, wow, there's so much in common. And I know you were saying it earlier when you were outside. But it was the same as the not celebrating little wins. Yeah. I rarely do that because I see how much work that needs to be done in the world. So I'm constantly focusing on what's next to solve or not what's next to heal, what's
Starting point is 00:16:16 next to have an impact on. Totally. Where do you kind of see that going or how do you want that to grow? Because I mean, we haven't even started talking about all the great activism work you're doing, which I think is important for people listening to know. But how do you see yourself transforming those elements we've just spoken about now, moving forward? How do you want them to change? Sure. I've been in a lot of ways I've earned,
Starting point is 00:16:41 but I've also been given this platform just from really being on TV and being in people's lives and feeling like they're connected to me. So I want to utilize that. I want to grow that and I want to utilize that for the good. I think that yes, I'm invested in these companies and I like to call them conscious companies because they're not purely just for the monetary investment. They're there because I see a bigger picture. So, companies like outstanding foods, I know that they have a direct effect in the lives of animals,
Starting point is 00:17:13 not to mention the health and the other trickle effects that come along with it, but companies like Sugar Taco, I believe in making vegan food, healthy organic vegan food that tastes delicious, accessible at a good price point because that's an argument of people's, you know, they have this idea that veganism is too expensive. It's not attainable.
Starting point is 00:17:35 It's not realistic for a normal person's lifestyle. That is what I want to scratch right off the bat. That is so far from the truth. And I feel like just not to go down another rabbit hole, but spending money on what you put into your body, much like spending the time and whatever investment you make to work out or health, wellness, whatever that means, meditating, whatever that investment you're making has such a huge impact in the big picture of your life. A lot of people spend all this money on healthcare, on pills, on things to make this instant
Starting point is 00:18:10 fix in their lives. When if you just do a little bit of the work along the way and you're really being mindful of how you create you as a whole and what you do to help yourself thrive, that is a non-factor. I don't know, knock on wood, but I don't know the last time I've seen a doctor, spent money at a pharmacist, all of the above. Never, I don't even take an abil, a Tylenol, nothing. But I really do believe that a lot of that is because I make conscious efforts to drink water, to work out,
Starting point is 00:18:40 to love myself, to meditate, to do something that makes me feel whole and balanced. So that goes along without saying, right, with these conscious companies, like if you can make these baby steps along the way and they become easy to implement into your lifestyle, then hopefully the bigger picture is that someone will gravitate towards either eating plant-based or taking better care of themselves and so on and so forth. So that's sort of the companies that I've invested in thus far. I have a couple that are on the ground level startups. I'm sure you know where it's you know. And I'm excited.
Starting point is 00:19:14 Right. As a consumer. As a future customer. I appreciate that. I'm also excited. But I love the way you do it because if you don't follow Daniela on Instagram, you should go and follow her because you make it fun. No, I think so. Like it's not preachy. Thank you. It's never condescending. You never sound like you're better than anyone or you've got it right or you've got
Starting point is 00:19:36 it figured out. It always comes from that space of just, you make it look fun. I saw you on your recent video, you went on the streets out with the big pig mascot. Yeah. And you're out with pig out bacon. And I just, I loved it. I was just like this energy is so fun. And it's, and even the fact that when we were speaking about it earlier, and you mentioned it now about how you've focused on making vegan food accessible and affordable, I just think the way you're thinking is so far ahead. You're so far ahead of how others are thinking about helping people. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:20:09 And yeah, and I love that. Thank you. I just think that there's so many people that are underserved. And there's these stereotypes that go along with that, right? You don't make a lot. You have to eat a certain way. They pump these saturated cities that are lower income with the McDonald's, with the Jack in the Box, with the elements that these people
Starting point is 00:20:30 can afford, right? They're not serving these companies, these communities in the right way. That's setting people up for the opposite of success. So to create awareness via social media and using your voice of the platform that you have to implement these different lifestyle changes along the way, I think that person tells their friend, tells their mom, tells that that's the way that I think. So the more honest I can be with people about how I live and really it's just how I live, it's not like perfect in any means, but it's just for me, it's worked. And when something works, like I just want people to know.
Starting point is 00:21:09 And I think it's like, it's our right to share with people and help people along the way. Because why wouldn't you? If you're thriving in your own right, then why wouldn't you share whatever tips or tricks that you have? And so I've sort of started a little pet project just on Instagram called Danielle's Digest. And it kind of goes in different terms of the word, right? So it's like, yes, what we put into our body and we digest it and all those kind of things. But also in general, like I just want to break down different articles and different facts and share inspiring messages.
Starting point is 00:21:45 And eventually I see myself interviewing people in this space, the health and wellness space, but also just always reminding ourselves to keep it light and fun. Yes. Because that's how I got into these people's lives. I'll never forget that. I do sitcom, I do comedy, that's my forte. And that's the approach I have in life.
Starting point is 00:22:03 If we can't laugh at it, even if it is deep and dark and scary, we have to find the light or else there's no optimism. There's no potential for change or innovation. You have to constantly be kind of seeking out the light, even in the darkest of times. And that's what I want this platform to sort of be. And I want that to resonate with people if they're feeling like
Starting point is 00:22:25 they're not motivated today or they need a nudge. Like that's what I want to be there to do. And I yeah, that's excited about it. Yeah, go find out on Instagram, Daniela's digest right? Yeah, I had it down on the notes. That's awesome. Yeah, I love that you're doing that. And I can agree with you more. My whole reasoning behind doing video at a time when most people in the health and wellness space were doing courses or they were writing books and they were speaking. And I was just like, we need to get this out to everyone. And my whole goal when I first started making videos was to make content that was at the
Starting point is 00:23:02 pace of entertainment. So I wanted it to feel like a short movie. I wanted it to feel like a song. I wanted it to feel like entertainment as opposed to education. But for it to have insightful messages within it. Now I'm not funny. So I had to be meaningful, meaningful videos that are not comedic, but I love it when comedy or any of this is viewed with the point of getting people towards the light. I couldn't agree with you more. I'm so glad you're doing that.
Starting point is 00:23:29 We need that more and more. Oh, thank you. Yeah, we genuinely need that more and more. Thank you. And I think the more of us that use our platforms and our skills and the talents that we have in whatever way it is to make things accessible, easy, relevant to everyone in the world. The more likely we're going to see it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:48 100%. I mean, they exist for a reason and you could use them however you choose. And I choose to think I'm not here for a long time. I'm here for a good time and I'm going to try to make some good out of it. I want to do that for people. You are. Thank you. So, I mean, please, you're preaching to the choir.
Starting point is 00:24:04 Okay. You are. Thank you. So I mean, please, you're preaching to the choir. Okay, so it's been so awesome to be able to see the content that you're creating. And honestly, it never stops at that. Like there's so, I just, I love the word trickle effects. I feel like that is the perfect word to explain what is happening in our generation and in the generation of social media. You just never know. And I think the unknown in that regard is optimism. And that's what I'm sort of striving for is more of that. Yeah, I wanted to pick that out because I think so many people in our generation also have a negative view of social media.
Starting point is 00:24:36 And I find that's because we're so consumed by it, rather than using it purposefully. And so we find that people actually feel their wasting. I know I saw a study that said people are wasting about six hours a day on social media, doing something meaningless or insignificant. How where do you get your optimism for social media and the trickle effect?
Starting point is 00:24:55 I know I get it, but how did you get to that point where you were like, actually, social media is helping, it can work. I think it started with realizing, you know, it's no different than taking that few minutes for yourself in the beginning of the day to drink your coffee or read a magazine or whatever it may be, watch the news. You're getting some sort of information to sort of and that really does trigger what's your day is going to be like, what's going to sort of ignite that spirit in you. And so I think people can use social media to do just that.
Starting point is 00:25:26 They just have to curate the right social media that they're sort of funneling into themselves. And that's why I feel like accounts like yours are so, I mean, that is the proof in the pudding right there. Starting your day off, and I know that you're strategic about when you post, because when I turn my phone on, and it's the first video I see, I'm grateful,
Starting point is 00:25:43 because I know that that's what my brain needs to absorb. If I'm going to choose to use social media, I'm going to choose to sort of put these positive images and these positive messages into me rather than saying, I hate to say it because no discount to them, they're a hustler in their own right and I'm sure they have their own purpose in mind, but I don't need to see a hundred different beauty bloggers and OOTDs to make myself feel like, you know, good enough. It doesn't do that for me personally. And some people do resonate with that, but personally, my goals are so different than that.
Starting point is 00:26:14 And so I think for someone out there who looks at social media in a negative way, be sure that you're using social media to benefit you and you're not just a consumer. And maybe take the approach of trying to create before you consume. I think that that's a really good tool to go about because creating something that can have its own trickle effect makes you feel like you're part of a bigger purpose, consuming social media unless you're using it purposefully can really weigh on you. So well said. Oh, unless you're using it purposefully, can really weigh on you.
Starting point is 00:26:46 So well said. Oh, thank you. So well said. Create before you consume my totally agree. When you're part of something, when you're part of creating something, it doesn't take you away from anything, right? When you're part of creating whatever
Starting point is 00:27:00 and else you're seeing. And I have to say that I get motivated by Daniela's extreme workout regime. Look, I'm just like, wow, I need to, yesterday you were pushing a truck. I was just like, what? I was like, oh my god, you've pushed it and then you were chasing it.
Starting point is 00:27:15 And then you ran around it. Oh goodness. And I was just like, wow, this is so epic. I was so impressed by it. I was like, thank you. Yeah, it's great, but that discipline you have, and I feel the same way about yours. You post so many, and you do make it funny too. I remember there was a time when you were eating avotos every day.
Starting point is 00:27:32 Yeah, oh yeah. And I'm a huge avotos fan. Yeah. It was just, I couldn't agree with you more. I think when you're also able to connect, I find the thing I love about social media is that you really attract the energy you create. You really attract the energy you put out. So if you're always putting out positive, meaningful messages, whether they're comedic or whether they're from my side more inspirational or positive,
Starting point is 00:27:56 whatever they may be, you start attracting people and that's how we connected. Yeah. Like we met once, but then I was following you on social media. I was like, oh wow, we align so much. And then we had a relationship built up out of social media. And we've not met often. This is in fact the second time we're going together, but I feel like I know you so well. And that's what I've loved about it. That when I've accelerated a relationship, and I say this to everyone, if you build up a good connection with someone online, go offline as soon as you can.
Starting point is 00:28:25 Like try and meet with that person for coffee or have lunch together or whatever it is. Obviously verifying that they're real and all the rest of it. But go and do that because you are going to build an amazing relationship with that person. You know, don't let it just be online. If you can go and meet that person, do it. I love that piece of advice. I think that's so great. And especially in this time, where so many people
Starting point is 00:28:47 can go years or longer with just having these, not fictional, they're real relationships, but without putting a face to the name and having that physical connection, I think there's so much more that can come of that. Yeah, so I totally agree with that. It's powerful. I want to go back to when you were talking a bit
Starting point is 00:29:04 about your parents Mm-hmm and growing up and now obviously you're engaged. Yeah, I'm going to give last December you were sharing Thank you, and I was I was lucky enough to meet your fiance as well, which is awesome when we first met and You guys just so cute together Thank you. We work at it. Yeah, you know, it's the biggest part of it, right? You want something so bad, you work at it. We just connected. We work well together for the most part, and I think we support one another's endeavors, and we respect each other's independence, but we're very much a unit. I know we were talking earlier, because a lot of people ask me about the wedding, and
Starting point is 00:29:41 there's so much of that on social media. You know, these big moments, these big chapters in your life are celebrated to the nines. I mean, the likes, the comments, the excitement around the buildup of an engagement or a proposal or a wedding or whatever. It almost makes you feel like everything in the middle is insignificant, which I think is such a misconception because it's the day to day that feels like the real success in a relationship. Wow. We can all have these moments where we celebrate one another. And everyone around us is celebrating our love and there's so much just anticipation around that.
Starting point is 00:30:13 But really, it's the day to day grind. It's no different than building a company. It's that day to day grind that inevitably sets you up for a successful business or relationship. And I feel like we're doing that. And the wedding is not on the forefront of my mind. I'm really more focused on being the right fit
Starting point is 00:30:32 and the right partnership. And on that note. Yeah. So yeah, I think that that's like my main focus is just being the right fit and having the right partnership together. What do you guys do to do that? What's your approach? What have you learned? How long have you been together?
Starting point is 00:30:49 We've been together almost eight years. Amazing. So you've been together for eight years. So anyone who's listening, that's real experience. Yeah. That's not, you know, that's not just, oh, we've been together for a year. So you've been together for eight years. What have you learned? What has worked for you? What can help other people?
Starting point is 00:31:03 He was my first relationship. So when I say I've learned, I have learned, okay, in terms of the moving in together and having this co-life style was easy. That was easy, peasy. I love it, which is interesting, right? Most people are like moving in as a very, you know, it could go one of two ways. And for us, it was like, I love to nurture and I love to nest. And anyone who's around me, it comes over.
Starting point is 00:31:26 I just, I crave that taking care of element, like that's something that feeds my soul. So easy, that fit right in. I think for me, I have an independence element that I've established since a young age. And so being in a relationship sometimes that that can be a little bit of a tricky element. But he's also an entrepreneur in his own right. So we sort of balance each other out. So being in a relationship sometimes that that can be a little bit of a tricky element,
Starting point is 00:31:45 but he's also an entrepreneur in his own right, so we sort of balance each other out. Like I found that person who can respect that quality in me and lifts that quality up rather than saying, oh yeah, it's another dreamer, it's another dream or whatever, you know. So we work at it and we've been figuring out how to communicate along the years and that changes as you evolve as humans. It's been fun and I think that to me is what keeps us interesting is that it's not monotonous. I mean, it's monotonous in a way that we're one for each other and that's it. It's not monotonous in our daily, weekly, monthly grind.
Starting point is 00:32:24 We love adventures and we love trying new things and we talk about not falling into the conventional relationship or what that may be for some people. Yeah. I love that we both talking about our, what's the right word? Our status quo, like... Yeah, our, not discusses. It's almost like we're not trying to follow the rules or something. Yeah, yeah, I don't know who invented the rules.
Starting point is 00:32:54 Who invented that? Who invented them? I don't agree with any of them. Yes. And why do they have to be tied to a saying age, a saying demographic, or a saying stage of life? And I've never, I've just never thought like that. I've never felt that life is a set of stages that you have to live in order.
Starting point is 00:33:13 And I feel like the more you do that, you push away from what you were saying, which is falling in love with the process. And then it becomes about the destination, it becomes about the next milestone. And I was saying that to someone, someone was asking me the question the other day, they said, Jay, how do you stay detached from the result? Like, how do you stay detached from an expectation of how something should go? And I said that it's when you get to the degree that you're getting all of what you need from the process, to that degree, you don't need it from a milestone or an end. But if you're not getting any juice from the process, then you're going to wait for that award.
Starting point is 00:33:48 You're going to wait for the milestone. You're going to wait for the big, the big day because you're not getting any happiness or joy. But if you're getting happiness and joy from the process, then you're not looking for it anywhere else. Dead on, dead on. And that's where rules and norms and I see that happens so much in our generation.
Starting point is 00:34:12 And I maybe it's because I'm at this age and I'm obviously in that, that age where everyone is sort of celebrating those big milestones, but there's not enough of celebrating the things that I feel like take more in our strength, which are owning a company or working for someone or striving to do something in the activist community or speaking about real problems or issues in their family, whatever it may be, like all these different little things along the way that make you up to be this whole person and this happy individual, it's not always about the wedding
Starting point is 00:34:43 or the baby shower, the big birthday bash or whatever it may be that kind of creates this identity of who you are for that moment because then you set yourself up for failure. You get to that peak. It's where do you go from there? And that's why you hear about these girl, like I have friends all the time. I'm like, I'm going through the blues, the wedding, the post wedding blues, and they're going through the depression of like, what was my life for a whole year? And now I have to reinvent the wheel. And that must feel so tricky. Definitely.
Starting point is 00:35:10 And the interesting thing about that is that can happen with starting a company, that can happen with, it can have that feeling can happen with anything. Yes, yes. And therefore, I believe being new, trying to say, what we're getting to is almost like, it shouldn't be around any of those. No. It's a personal choice. It's that personal exploration, that curiosity. Yeah. Because there are I know people who've built successful companies and 10 years on and
Starting point is 00:35:33 now re-trying to find their identity because identity was so close linked to that company. That's how I feel about acting. Right. I feel like for so long, my identity was, and I was just telling a friend of mine. It's like in my family and my identity was, and I was just telling a friend of mine, it's like in my family and my group of friends, like there's the actress, that's the girl who, you know, was on TV or whatever. And I'm so different than that identity. Like there's so many different layers to all of us. I just, I want to be the person who expresses the layers in between. And I think that's what I want other people to feel acceptable doing as well because there's so much that makes us great. Yeah, I love that. Expressing the layers in between.
Starting point is 00:36:10 Yeah. Yeah, it's so true. We can be seen as so one dimensional, even if you're not. I would, I would job titles, make us one dimensional. It's like that becomes your imprint. And that's why I'm getting, that's why I get excited by every time I get asked to send my biography for an event, I'm speaking out or whatever it is. I literally struggle. You're like what to write. I didn't even know how to describe what I do. And then my mom will be like, I want to tell you my friends what you do. And I'm like, yeah, I'm not sure mom, like how you can explain it. Because if I told you a title, they wouldn't understand.
Starting point is 00:36:40 It's beautiful that we are struggling to define ourselves in one sense. Yes. Because we are multilayered and multifaceted, and we have so many more dimensions and elements, as opposed to saying, I am this, and defining ourselves by a word or a job. Absolutely. Because then you, by nature, somehow and still all this happiness and that identity, and what if at some point that identity dissipates?
Starting point is 00:37:07 Yes. Or you decide to pivot. And then all of a sudden you have to teach the people around you that, no, that's okay. Like, I don't resonate as that. And that's not all of who I am. I'm going to pivot into this. And this is also a part of who I am.
Starting point is 00:37:20 And this also feeds me. And this also makes me feel empowered. It's a tricky thing to sort of navigate sometimes. It sounds like you had to do that with your friends and family. Yeah, and I think little by little, I mean, everyone always thinks that I'm just gonna fall into another show and I probably will at some point, but I'm taking this time to do what I think I'm supposed to do right now
Starting point is 00:37:39 and I think there's a bigger purpose behind all of it. How have you connected that with your family and friends, like how have they been able to see that rise of you? Because I guess I've only known that side of you. Right, right. So I've only known you as an activist more than anything, really. And I see you as an incredible activist. You're doing amazing work.
Starting point is 00:37:58 So how have the people who've had to evolve with you? How have you helped them see the different side of you or has it just happened? You know, it's been really nice that social media is so prevalent because people see what I'm doing very quickly and they kind of get on board pretty quickly, but no matter what I do,
Starting point is 00:38:14 I don't know that I'll ever be able to shake the actress identity and I'm okay with it, but I just hope that they know that there's so much more than that, you know? And that's, you know, that's all. And I think you've leveraged it, which is what we were saying earlier. And that's the best bit, I think, that you've leveraged that identity to be able to be everything else you want to be.
Starting point is 00:38:37 And people like you said, take you seriously, they follow you because of this particular identity, but you're showing. So I actually think it works hand in hand. Yeah, so do I. If it works hand in hand. So I'm not trying to shake it too much, but I also want people to know, there's those layers. They're there. I know, exactly.
Starting point is 00:38:51 Yeah, keep it. Good bullet points underneath. Yeah, keep it. We need it because I think anyone I speak to that wants to be an advocate for change, an ambassador, an activist, I feel like when you are known for something, when you are influential in a particular way, everything you do becomes more amplified.
Starting point is 00:39:09 It's just a world we live in. I know. And I'm aware of that. Yeah. No, I know you. I know. I know. When I hear that, it's almost like I need to reinstall
Starting point is 00:39:18 that way of thinking as well, because I know that there is a reason why I've been given so many amazing opportunities to be on a platform or reach more people. And I sometimes forget how important that piece is and be so grateful for all of that. And with your intention, it's perfect. Thank you. Like, that's why I think I feel very confident saying that to you because I know what your
Starting point is 00:39:42 intention is and it's so much deeper. So when you have that beautiful intention and then you give influence to that intention, that amplification is beautiful. Whereas if the intention is just greed, enjoyment, negativity, fame, power, etc. And then you give that amplification, that never leads to any good. And I feel like I think you'll also inspire not only people who watch you or know you for what you've done, but also peers in this space to find more meaning in their life too, because I find that I was speaking to someone who's a successful singer the other day. And he
Starting point is 00:40:20 was showing the same thing with me that he struggles with the industry and the kind of messages that are put out. And I was like, yeah, but you can change that. Like people listen to your opinion. So you're not turning up to interviews and award shows and actually sharing the right message is actually a disservice. Like it's actually a disservice because you're not turning up, it makes says nothing. You're turning up and sharing something says everything. And that's, I think you'll not only inspire the people that are watching and following and part of the community but inspire peers, which I'm excited to see. Oh, thank you. When I'm listening to you, what I'm hearing so much is I hear passion, I hear meaning,
Starting point is 00:40:59 I hear fulfillment. And I'm not saying any of that's perfect. And we both know that. And same with my life. But I'm hearing all of that, and in my opinion, that comes because you're a person of service, because you're an activist, and that identity of yours, that layer of yours is what's fueling all of this, right? Yeah, no, I just had this conversation. I was telling someone the other day,
Starting point is 00:41:21 they were struggling to find out what their identity was, what their purpose is, like, they just struggling to find out what their identity was, what their purpose is. They just feel like they live a more mundane lifestyle and they just feel like they're constantly on that wheel of just what is the life, what is this? And I said, are you serving? And they looked at me and they just didn't know what that meant. I said, are you serving? Like it could be on the smallest way, but are you doing anything for anyone, whether it
Starting point is 00:41:42 be a friend, family member, community, animal, whatever? That feels like power. That is something we all can do. That doesn't, there's no definition that describes someone who serves other than, it's all of us. We all can do that. And the feeling of doing something that can make an impact on someone else's life or
Starting point is 00:42:03 in a bigger impact than you even could have imagined yourself makes you feel like there's a purpose. And who knows what can transpire from that. So thank you for even saying that because there's something really special about finding that service element in your life because I just, there's so much good, there's just so much good that can come up bad. I am Yomla and on my podcast, The R-Spot, we're having inspirational, educational, and sometimes difficult and challenging conversations about relationships.
Starting point is 00:42:38 They may not have the capacity to give you what you need. And insisting means that you are abusing yourself now. You human. That means that you're crazy as hell. Just like the rest of us. When a relationship breaks down, I take copious notes and I want to share them with you. Anybody with two eyes and a brain knows that too much Alfredo sauce is just no good for you. But if you're gonna eat it, they're not gonna stop you. Yup.
Starting point is 00:43:11 So he's gonna continue to give you the Alfredo sauce and put it even on your grits if you don't stop him. Listen to the R-Spot on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to podcasts. In the 1680s, a feisty opera singer burned down a nunnery and stole away with her secret lover. In 1810, a pirate queen negotiated her cruiseway to total freedom, with all their loot. During World War II, a flirtatious gambling double agent helped keep D-Day a secret from the Germans.
Starting point is 00:43:50 What do these stories have in common? They're all about real women who were left out of your history books. If you're tired of missing out, check out the Womanica podcast, a daily women's history podcast highlighting women you may not have heard of but definitely should know about. I'm your host Jenny Kaplan and for me, diving into these stories is the best part of my day. I learned something new about women from around the world and leave feeling amazed, inspired and sometimes shocked.
Starting point is 00:44:18 Listen on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Jay Shetty, and on my podcast on purpose, I've had the honor to sit down with some of the most incredible hot some minds on the planet. Oprah, everything that has happened to you can also be a strength builder for you if you allow it. Kobe Bryant, the results don't really matter. It's the figuring out that matters. Kevin Haw. It's not about us as a generation at this point. It's about us trying our best to create change. Lumin's Hamilton. That's for me been taking that moment for yourself each day, being kind to yourself because I think for a long time I wasn't kind to myself. And many, many more. If
Starting point is 00:45:01 you're attached to knowing, you don't have a capacity to learn. On this podcast, you get to hear the raw real-life stories behind their journeys and the tools they used, the books they read, and the people that made a difference in their lives so that they can make a difference in hours. Listen to on purpose with Jay Shetty on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Join the journey soon. Yeah, definitely. I remember getting so into understanding service after I lived as a monk for three years.
Starting point is 00:45:31 Yeah. And service was a total part of our life. Like, that was, that is the foundational principle of everything. Wow. And then when I came back to the real world, I was like, okay, I need to understand how true this is scientifically, too. And I saw this incredible study that I did at Cambridge okay, I need to understand how true this is scientifically, too. And I saw this incredible study that it at Cambridge University,
Starting point is 00:45:48 where this guy called Michael Norton, he tested how people feel when they were given five to $20 to spend on themselves or spend on other people. And they measured their happiness before and after, without telling them it was a happiness experiment. And they found that everyone who used five or $20 on themselves were no happier than they were before. So your happiness didn't go down, but it didn't go up. And everyone who spent the money on other people, whether it was $5 or $20,
Starting point is 00:46:15 their happiness went up by at least 10 to 20%. And so it was just scientifically from a data point of view, forget how we feel and forget what we know, just from that point of view. And the funny thing is that the most common things people bought each other were like, bought themselves with Starbucks and makeup. Oh my goodness. And the most common thing people bought others with Starbucks and makeup. So it wasn't even about what it was. It was that feeling of giving. And the whole study kind of concluded by saying, money can buy happiness if you spend it on other people. And it wasn't all about money,
Starting point is 00:46:45 it was in terms of time and energy as well. So investment of any sort. Right, even if you don't have money, it's that investment of time and energy. Oh, that's so powerful. Oh my goodness, I just hope people take that away. You know, like I hope that really lands because it doesn't cost anything. I mean, it is a measure of money in that regard, but it doesn't cost anything to serve. And it could be so simple.
Starting point is 00:47:06 I mean, people say, call your grandparents, you know? And you don't want to call your grandparents. You get off the phone with your grandparents, and you feel like a hundred bucks. You're like, wow, I just made her day. And maybe she didn't really know who I was. Like, she was really, who was that? It didn't matter.
Starting point is 00:47:20 That is the piece that makes you feel like you did something that's bigger than you. and you step outside of being a selfish person. Like we all tend to be because it feels like survival of life sometimes. But yeah, it's awesome. Power of service for sure. I love it.
Starting point is 00:47:37 Yeah, I often say as we're wired for generosity, but we've been educated for greed. And it's, you know, as kids, what you said, what you started with this whole conversation, I'm going back to that, you started by saying that as kids, we're almost, you know, our best selves. And that's why when you had that incredible decision at five years old, we're able to kind of tap into how we really feel. And I genuinely believe that kids are wired for generosity, and kids were wired for generosity. And then education of all types comes in. I don't just mean
Starting point is 00:48:10 the educational system. And it kind of rewires us to become me, me, me. So it's beautiful. And I think everyone who's listening for those of you don't know, and we've gone so deep with Daniela today. But you know, you work with a nonprofit called Bridget. Yeah, meet Bridget. Yeah, that uses video creation to equip underserved teen girls to envision themselves in careers outside their media environments. Tell us a bit about that because I want the audience to hear about these things because that's why it's so good having this conversation with you because you're living it.
Starting point is 00:48:40 You're not saying it. You're not preaching it. You're not just posting on Instagram about it. Like you're behind. You're an activist by so many it, you're not just posting on Instagram about it. You're behind, you're an activist by so many great ventures. Tell us a bit about that one. Oh my goodness, one of the most amazing females crossed my path through yoga, ironically, I mean, not really so ironically, there's some amazing people in yoga.
Starting point is 00:48:58 Her name is Aasha and she used to work in the field of yoga and she was going to school and she saw this need in the female community and these younger generalities of girls, these younger demos that are underserved and she created Bridgett, which is a community of girls that need a little bit of like a big sister element and also someone who can help guide them in their career path and give them that extra tool or hope or skill or just assist along the ways. I mean, some of these girls are young moms or just kind of were dealt a unique set of cards and need some more hope. And so we've teamed up with Microsoft, we're doing an event at USC and we're talking about the Me Too movement and we're just speaking about the tougher things but also giving a lot of hope and skills to this group of girls. And if you don't know about it, I recommend just doing a little bit of homework and following
Starting point is 00:49:57 us or whatever and coming to one of our events and we're all just real people at the end of the day and we're just trying to do our part to instill whatever we can in these young girls. Yeah, that's beautiful. Yeah, thanks to all it's yeah, it's great to speak to a real changemaker. Like someone who's like your grassroots, your, but you're also an entrepreneur in the activism space. Yeah, and that's empowering, I think, for a lot of people to see that you can do good. Yes. And make money. Yes. And be successful at the same time. And you don't have to say no.
Starting point is 00:50:28 And I think for a long time, I felt, and especially when I was growing up, maybe it's in London or I always believed that you couldn't do good and be successful. Like there were two opposite things. Like if you were successful, you were successful, well, maybe you're a bit greedy. But you've got to be successful. You have to be greedy. And then at the other end, I used to think, oh, yeah, do good in people don't make money. And I always had, I don't know where that came from. And I'm still trying to explore that, but I always have that viewpoint.
Starting point is 00:50:51 And it's nice to see now in our generation, people bring that together to show that actually you can do more when you have more resources. Oh, yes. I feel like that's happening all over the place. These bigger companies are realizing that people want to put their money and these consumers care about where their money is going. And as soon as people, it's supplying demand, right? So as soon as people start to supply for something more than just consumer goods or more than just getting their needs met and they want a bigger picture involved in this, like these companies will all start to follow suit because they'll realize like, oh, people are becoming a little more woke over here. It's time to step up our game.
Starting point is 00:51:28 Yeah. And that's what I want to be a part of. I want to be a part of those companies that are realizing that from the beginning. Yeah. And being the game changers, right? I love it. I love it. I've got my five big questions for you.
Starting point is 00:51:39 Oh, okay. As we come to a close. Okay. So these are usually quick, but they've been a bit longer recently when I've been doing them because I have awesome guests than everyone has awesome business here. So, I stopped doing them as quick questions because I was like, if it gets deep, it's deep.
Starting point is 00:51:54 Okay. And you can make them as funny as you like to. Okay, okay. So, I genuinely feel like this, and again, I'm saying this to everyone, and I know Daniela would say this about ourselves. It's not about being perfect, but you do seem really happy and content and That energy comes out very naturally through you. What what makes you happy? I start my day with a cup of coffee Nice again, and I I evaluate what I'm doing
Starting point is 00:52:16 I always am checking in with myself and I know when I'm feeling alone I either pop a B vitamin or I get to the gym and usually I get to the gym before I do anything because I know that there are certain things that make me who I am. And if I'm not the happiest person that I can be, then I can't serve in the way that I can do best, right? Absolutely. So I know the things that work for me. And it's working out, it's being conscious of what I'm putting in my body. It's drinking coffee. I hate to say it, but it is. It gives me energy. I'm not an addict by any means,
Starting point is 00:52:48 but I do know that there are certain things that make me who I am. And that's part of it. Amazing. Awesome. Second question. Number one question, you'd ask a monk. Have you ever met a monk? No, just you.
Starting point is 00:52:59 Interesting. It's just me. Okay. What would you ask a monk if you ever met one? Oh my goodness. What is your skin routine? Ha! Would you actually ask you ask a monk if you ever met one? Oh my goodness, what does a Monday look like? That's what I'm asking you. Oh, you are, it's an interesting thing. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:27 What did a Monday used to look like? So I'm not a monk anymore, but I used to be, your morning start off the same. And that's the morning routine thing is such a, I mean, it's really propelled into mainstream society now to have a good morning routine, et cetera. But all of our days would start at 4 a.m. You'd wake up at 4 a.m.
Starting point is 00:53:44 You'd start meditating collectively at 4.30. And then by about 5.15 you'd have independent meditation or personal private meditation. And half the day basically is spent in silence and self-awareness. It's your growth. It's about taking care of yourself, your needs, your learning, your development. And then the other half is spent in service. So the other half is spent being out there, whether it's helping build sustainable villages or building food distribution programs or teaching young kids or sharing the message or teaching meditation, whatever it may be.
Starting point is 00:54:18 So that construct is something that I've tried to take through in my life. That half of my life should be spent learning growing. Even this exchange, like from today, I'm just learning, I'm just listening to you without trying to charge, without trying to teach, without trying to share. And then the rest of my day is spent serving by teaching, et cetera. And so that's kind of what a Monday looks like. That's what every day looks like. Yeah, I love it.
Starting point is 00:54:43 But yeah, okay. Question number three. The best advice you've ever received. Oh, that's a, I feel like I was, you know, a couple from you today, to be honest. Gosh, the best advice. Wow, it's scary when you start to draw blinks on that. Okay. And because I almost feel like some of the advice that I've gotten along the way has all been self-taught
Starting point is 00:55:09 or self-learned. But then again, I would say that following leaders like you, I really do feel that way. There are people out there in my network or in my circle that I learned from on a daily basis. And I think there's just too many to even choose. I don't even know where I would start. Nice.
Starting point is 00:55:28 That's cool. Yeah. That's fine. And then the question I was best mentor you've ever had, or some of the best mentors. Oh, best mentor. Oh my gosh. Wow.
Starting point is 00:55:37 I'm finding a lot now, for sure. I think growing up, I didn't even know I had mentors. My aunt was a significant role play in my life. There was a time where I didn't even know I had mentors. My aunt was a significant role play in my life. There was a time where I didn't know where I was living. I had my clothes in the back of my car. I was kind of just sleeping where I could sleep until I figured it out. And my aunt gave me her couch for a while.
Starting point is 00:55:57 And I learned a lot. I got a lot done in that amount of time. I went to Community College. I got my personal training certification. I went to community college, I got my personal training certification, I went to school for real estate, got my license, like there was this time where I was trying to figure it out, all amongst acting, which is crazy. I always felt like there was more than acting, always. And that couch and being in my aunt's life, still to this day, she's someone I lean on immensely. She's full of knowledge, full of wisdom, and she
Starting point is 00:56:25 did a lot of work on herself and still does. And those are the people that I aspire to be like. Yeah. I'm going to I'm going to segue before I ask you the little question because you just made me think of a few things there. What are your thoughts on so young men and women today who want to be actors, who want to be social media influences, who want to be anything that gives you that platform, what would you advise them. Well, I think we live in a time where you can do it. That's the first thing I would tell someone is it's not a joke. Like you have more resources than like someone who lives in the heart of LA or Hollywood or whatever you imagine, who's going to auditions every day. You know? Maybe decide what your true goal is in terms of what kind of entertainment you want to put out and then target that.
Starting point is 00:57:16 So find the network around that, find the demo and start creating content on your own because at the end of the day, even people who are actors are still content creators. And I think there's so much more power and so much more self-worth in creating something of your own, but not to say that using acting as a platform isn't the right tool as well, because I do that as well. But I think a little bit of everything, working alongside, collaborating with people, creating your own, that is all equipment to become someone in the public eye or someone who has a voice or an actor.
Starting point is 00:57:49 Those are all things you could be doing. And I always tell kids too, get involved in school plays, get your feet wet, stand in front of a large audience with the lights burning in your face. Okay, just try it on. Try it on a few times. Were you shy the first time? Or were you always like...
Starting point is 00:58:04 Gosh, I don't remember ever being shy. In fact, I feel like I was really annoying most of my childhood is what I think. And I think about me as a kid, I'm like, gosh, she must have been so annoying. But I don't know, I just, I always felt like I, I didn't have a fear of speaking up. Yeah. I'm so glad you're using that fearlessness of speaking out for the right thing. Thank you. Yeah, thank you. And my last question before I ask you, whatever else you wanted to share that I didn't cover
Starting point is 00:58:31 today's, the worst advice you've ever been given. Oh, the worst advice. Oh, my gosh. You're going to hear it. But the one that comes to mind. After I had lost significant weight and I got my head back in the game and I started to get healthy. I put on quite a bit of weight.
Starting point is 00:58:49 I thought it was like the right thing to do at the time. I felt generally happy, but I just knew where I was, wasn't where I should have been, so I'm going to do something else. My manager at the time advised against it and was very honest about me putting weight on and she told me that Nothing tastes good as good as skinny feels and Yeah, and I'd say that's the first thing that came to mind. Yeah, it's pretty bad advice Because let me tell you a lot of things taste good. Yeah bad advice, because let me tell you, a lot of things taste good. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:24 Absolutely. My idea is really important message. And that's why I was asked people the worst advice they've ever been given, because I feel more people in their life will hear bad advice than good advice. Yeah. And so to be able to know which one's which helps a lot, because good advice is actually more rare. So when people are hearing this,
Starting point is 00:59:45 and they're hearing you share your worst advice, and other guests who are showing their worst advice, I want people to kind of get an arsenal of the worst advice so that they know never to buy into that. So smart. So that makes sense. That's that is good advice. Is there anything we've not covered today that you're like,
Starting point is 01:00:03 Oh my goodness. I don't want to share this story, I didn't get to share this message or anything. I always like bringing that up because, yeah. I just want to tap in one really quick thing. Please, it doesn't have to be. Yeah, so I've been in this industry for a long time. I've come across a lot of very headstrong personalities.
Starting point is 01:00:21 And I was in some uncomfortable positions with males and I learned a lot from it. And I'm going to eventually tell a little bit of this story, but I also feel like the one thing I want people to take away from just the Me Too movement in itself because I've never really spoken out about it is, and this might be a controversial angle. But whatever it may be that you've struggled from as someone in a position of vulnerability or feeling taken advantage of,
Starting point is 01:00:55 there is such a strength that comes from that low. And I am a firm believer of utilizing that low. And I am a firm believer of utilizing that and harnessing that strength to create something that is instrumental in your lives and in the lives of other people. So I just feel like if anyone's listening and feels like something was done wrong to them, whether male, female, whatever it may be, instead of taking and I get that everyone needs their time to sort of comfort themselves and maybe even soak in that moment because believe me, a good cry is a recipe for a lot of answers.
Starting point is 01:01:33 But after you're done, take that time and say, I am so ready to be the biggest boss. That's what I just wanted to make sure I said because I don't know, it applies to a lot of things and I just really believe in like with every element of weakness or devastation or anything that anyone's encountered that felt wrong. There's so much strength that can come of that. So I just hope that people can like hear that and feel stronger. Thank you for sharing that. Yeah. Yeah, thank you.
Starting point is 01:02:05 Thank you so much, Benyala, for being here. I'm so grateful. That was amazing. We talked about so many amazing things. And I learned so much. Oh, good. And the time just flew by. I think we were talking for like one and a half hours.
Starting point is 01:02:16 But I just, I didn't even feel it. Oh my god. I didn't even feel it. It feels like we just got to go. Oh my gosh, we'll do dinner sometime. Yes, we have to. We have to. But thank you so much for coming on. Everyone who's listening, please, please, please go check out
Starting point is 01:02:27 Daniela on Instagram. Is there anywhere else they should try and find you? No, I mean, I'm on it all. Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, just in Yalamone. Yeah, absolutely. Thank you so much again for coming and sharing so openly. Honestly, it was really a lot of good learning from me. It's not good. It's not good. Good, I'm glad. Thank you. Thanks guys. Thanks. Thank you so much for listening through to the end of that episode. I hope you're going to share this all across social media. Let people know that you're subscribed to on purpose. Let me know, post it. Tell me what a difference it's making in your life. I would love to see your thoughts. I can't wait for this incredibly conscious community
Starting point is 01:03:11 we're creating of purposeful people. You're now a part of the tribe, a part of the squad. Thank you for being here. I can't wait to share the next episode with you. Hi, I'm David Eagleman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on I Heart. I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences by tackling unusual questions. Like, can we create new senses for humans? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to intercosmos with David Eagleman on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcasts or
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