On Purpose with Jay Shetty - Do THIS 2 Minute Trick To Stop a Negative Spiral INSTANTLY (Overthinkers You Need to Hear This Episode!)

Episode Date: May 2, 2025

Have you ever caught yourself stuck in a spiral of negative thoughts? Do you have a go-to way to reset when you’re feeling overwhelmed? Today, Jay dives into one of the most common modern struggles: overthinking. Whether it's an unanswered text, a mistake at work, or uncertainty about your next step, our minds often trap us in loops of doubt, fear, and frustration. But what if the path to peace starts with a few spiritual truths? In this episode, Jay shares timeless wisdom from the Bhagavad Gita and Buddhist teachings to help you finally stop spiraling and start releasing. He walks you through five powerful shifts—from learning how to emotionally declutter your space and mind, to embracing the truth that pain is part of life, but suffering is a choice. Jay also introduces practical rituals—like writing and discarding thoughts—that are scientifically proven to help you regulate difficult emotions. With heartfelt insight, Jay explores how we can become friends with our own minds and stop rehearsing conversations and conflicts that never happen. He urges us to face the things we’re avoiding, take action instead of postponing, and learn the art of letting go with intention. In this episode, you’ll learn: How to Stop Thought Spirals Before They Take Over. Why Writing Down Your Emotions Can Help You Let Go. The Difference Between Pain and Suffering—and How to Reduce Both. How Your Environment Impacts Your Mental State. Why Speaking the Truth Sets You Free from Overthinking. This episode is your invitation to choose presence over perfection and peace over pressure. Whether you're caught in a loop of overthinking or simply craving clarity, this conversation will bring you back to stillness. With Love and Gratitude, Jay Shetty Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here. Join Jay for his first ever, On Purpose Live Tour! Tickets are on sale now. Hope to see you there! What We Discussed: 00:00 Introduction 00:43 How to Let Go Gracefully 04:58 #1: How Writing Down Your Thoughts Calm Your Mind 09:00 #2: How to Start Decluttering Your Mind 15:23 #3: How Acceptance Lessens the Pain 20:11 #4: How to Have Difficult Conversations Real Time 21:30 #5: Don't Delay What Can Be Done TodaySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Are your money skills total trash? Well, you are not alone. Personal finance ignorance is as American as apple pie. But don't fret. The How to Money podcast is here to help you improve. Think, Matt, if your emergency fund was invested, especially given the volatility we're experiencing right now. Ouchie. Investing, it is ultimately a necessity, but you got to keep that emergency fund accessible. It needs to be cash parked in your savings. It's time to increase your money knowledge.

And the How to Money podcast is here to bring the wisdom. Open your free iHeartRadio app, search How to Money, and start listening today. Prohibition is synonymous with speakeasies, jazz, flappers, and of course, failure. I'm Ed Helms, and on season three of my podcast, Snafu, there's a story I couldn't wait to tell you. It's about an unlikely duo in the 1920s who tried to warn the public that Prohibition was going to backfire so badly, it just might leave thousands dead from poison. Listen and subscribe to Snafu on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Calling all 990ers, now streaming. It's the More Better podcast with two episodes of Brooklyn 9-9 fun.

Host Stephanie Beatriz and Melissa Fumero welcome former castmates Chelsea Ferretti and Joe Lattrullio for one episode each to laugh and swap stories. Like Andre would always be like, trying something and they're like, do less. Do less. Yeah, we do less all the time. But then some of the biggest things were the biggest hits, like Vindication, remember? Listen to more better with Stephanie and Melissa on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey everyone, it's Jay Shetty, and I'm thrilled to announce my podcast tour. For the first time ever, you can experience on purpose, in person. Join me in a city near you for meaningful meaningful insightful conversations with surprise guests. It could be a celebrity, top wellness expert or a CEO

or business leader. We'll dive into experiences designed to experience growth, spark learning and build real connections. I can't wait to meet you. There are a limited number of VIP experiences for a private Q&A, intimate meditation and a meet-and-greet with photos. Tickets are on sale now. Head to jsheddy.me forward slash tour and get yours today. When we can shift that story to instead of why is this happening to me all the way through to well what can I do about it? What skill is this asking me to develop? What is this reminding me that I've forgotten? What wisdom is inside of this that I need to learn?

As soon as you shift to a solution, proactive approach, you don't have the suffering. You will always have the pain. You don't have to suffer from it. The number one health and wellness podcast. Jay Shetty. Jay Shetty. The one, the only, Jay Shetty.

Are you still thinking about something that happened last week at work and you're kind of embarrassed about it? Or maybe you're waiting for someone to text you and you're wondering why they haven't replied for 24 hours. Or maybe you've been on a dating app recently and someone ghosted you and you're wondering why they haven't replied for 24 hours. Or maybe you've been on a dating app recently and someone ghosted you and you're totally overthinking it. Overthinking, spiralling, crashing out are things we do every single day. It almost feels like our minds are overflowing with the same negative thought patterns all the time. What do we do?

If you've experienced any of those things before, this episode is for you. I want to share with you spiritual truths that help us understand how to stop overthinking and actually learn to let go. The first is everything is impermanent. It's important that we learn to let go gracefully. The Bhagavad Gita has a beautiful verse, 2.14, that says

The non-permanent appearance of happiness and distress and their disappearance in due course are like the appearance and disappearance of the winter and summer seasons. They arise from sense perception and one must learn to tolerate them without being disturbed. I love this verse from the Bhagavad Gita and it's something that I really want you to take in. When you wake up in the morning and it's raining, if you let that define your mood, if you overthink it, it will totally ruin your day.

If you wake up and you only feel happy when it's sunny, it sets you up for failure on a day when it's dark and it's not sunny. How do we learn to tolerate this as the Bhagavad Gita is saying? How do we get to a point where we don't overthink everything that happens around us and let it affect what's happening inside of us? I want to talk to you about the skill of recognizing impermanence. There's a beautiful story of the farmer and his son. It's a Zen story that I love to share. While the son is wandering the land, he comes across a horse. He's able to ride this horse back and they have a great sense of compatibility and he brings the horse back home. All the villagers gather around and they say to the father, this is amazing, what great news, your son has this horse.

And the father replies, good thing, bad thing, who knows. The next day when the son is riding the horse, the horse has a slight trip and an accident and knocks the son off and the son breaks his leg. The villagers gather around and say, oh no, this is the worst thing that could have happened. This is so terrible. You should have never let the horse come back.

The farmer says, good thing, bad thing, who knows? A few months later, while the boy is still healing, every single man in this village is recruited to join the army. Apart from the son, because of his broken leg. The villagers gather and say, you're so lucky, you're so fortunate. This is the best thing that could have happened. The father replies, good thing, bad thing, who knows.

And of course the story goes on. What this story teaches us is not that we want bad things to happen to us, or it's not that we want negative things to happen to anyone, but that we realize that all of these things are impermanent. They're not going to last forever. They're ephemeral. A sunny day doesn't last forever, and a rainy day doesn't last forever. These things come and go like the seasons. This is what we have to learn. We learn to let go when we're prepared for the season. If you know it's gonna rain but you've got your

rain boots and you've got your umbrella, it doesn't matter. You're prepared. If you know it's gonna be really hot out and you've got your flip-flops and your sunscreen, you're prepared. Letting go isn't about doing nothing. It's about focusing on what you can prepare. Letting go is not the act of not being worried or not worrying about the consequences or not thinking about what's going to happen.

Letting go is being proactive and preparing in the way that you can. Whatever season is going to come your way, do you have the appropriate clothing in your closet? Whatever season is going to come your way, is your mind prepared to deal with it? Let us remember that both good and bad experiences are both impermanent. Now let's say that you feel the same thoughts spiral in your mind every single day.

The same things trigger you, block you and slow you down. What do you do about it? The first piece of wisdom is getting the thought out of your head and onto a page. It's really hard to filter thoughts while they're spiraling and circling around your mind. When you actually write down how you're feeling, you're extracting that emotion from within yourself and taking it into a place that you can get tactile with it. If a thought's outside of your head,

you can now actually do something with it. One of the things that's recommended is either ripping it up and discarding of it, potentially even burning it to really let go of it, or allowing yourself to throw it into the trash. Now you may think these are woo-woo ideas, but actually the Nagoya University study in 2024 found that participants who wrote down their angry thoughts

and then shredded or discarded the paper experienced a significant reduction in anger. In contrast, those who kept the paper saw only a minor decrease in anger levels. The act of physically disposing of the paper played a crucial role in alleviating negative emotions. Think about that for a second. The act of writing something down and discarding of that paper, ripping it up, throwing it in the trash, burning it,

actually starts to free you from that emotional experience. It's mind-blowing to even think about it. And did you notice what I said there in the study? If you hold on to it, like a journal or even keep it around, it actually doesn't have the same impact. Another example is the Ohio State University research from 2012. A study published in Psychological Science demonstrated that individuals who wrote down their negative thoughts and then threw the paper away were more likely to mentally discard those thoughts. Conversely, those who kept the paper were more likely to dwell on the negative content.

So it's not just about writing it down, it also is about releasing it. Studies show that burning photographs of an ex-partner can serve as a powerful symbolic act to facilitate emotional release and closure after a breakup. This is from a study that I read in PMC. How many of you have held on to things that your ex gave you? How many of you have kept in a shoebox letters, mementos, gifts from an ex partner

because there's a part of you that still is connected to them? Burn it. Let it go. Discard it. If you truly want to release someone from your life, release items, memories and things like that physically. Actually let it go in order to mentally let it go.

Another study from ResearchGate that analysed personal grief rituals found that symbolic actions, including the disposal of objects through elements like fire, support emotional healing by providing a tangible method to express and release complex feelings. I remember when I interviewed Nessa Barrett on my podcast On Purpose and she had this song called Burn Box. This idea of really being able to release something. So next time you find a thought appearing in your mind every single day, I want you to write it down on a piece of paper.

I want you to rip it up. I want you to shred it. I want you to put it in the fire, burn it and let it go. And see how you feel lighter and liberated from that weight. you to shred it, I want you to put it in the fire, burn it and let it go and see how you feel lighter and liberated from that weight. Spiritual truth number two. We all have heard that your inner world shapes your outer reality but there's an even more hidden truth here. Your outer reality shapes your inner world. If you feel like you're overthinking, clean that closet, tidy that cupboard, reorganize your desk. The

practical act of cleaning, tidying or reorganizing literally cleans and orders your mind. Waking up to zero clutter frees you from the stress you feel when you see unwashed dishes or that messy desk or that piece of art on your wall that is slightly off-center. It's fascinating to me how many of us are hoping to have a peaceful mind in a chaotic living room. A peaceful mind in a messy kitchen. A peaceful mind in a disorganized bedroom. And it's actually the act of decluttering. It's not just

walking into a clean space. When you start cleaning, when you start organizing, it's almost like you're filing away files in your mind. Have you ever felt like you have too many tabs open on your laptop? Imagine how many tabs are open in your mind. When you start to clean up the tabs on your laptop, the tabs on your screen, all of a sudden you start to mentally declutter.

Now let's look at the research on this. Clutter affects your mind. The first way is cognitive overload. Clutter competes for your attention, leading to cognitive overload. This constant visual distraction can impair your ability to focus and process information. A study using fMRI scans found that individuals in organized environments were better able to concentrate and process information compared to those in cluttered spaces. Clear your space to clear your mind.

Clean that closet, clean the table, wash the dishes, put away your clothes, and see how your mind starts to feel more creative, more productive, boost your energy. It may feel like a chore and a task but it's something that will actually heal you. I couldn't be more excited to share something truly special with all you tea lovers out there and even if you don't love tea, if you love refreshing, rejuvenating, refueling sodas that are good for you, listen to this. Radhi and I poured our hearts into creating Juni Sparkling Tea with adaptogens for you because we believe in nurturing your body and with every sip you'll experience calmness of mind, a refreshing vitality and a burst of brightness to your day.

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The second way that clutter affects us is that it actually elevates our stress hormones. Research indicates that individuals, particularly women, who perceive their homes as cluttered have higher levels of cortisol, the stress hormone. If you want to start reducing your daily stress, start by organizing your home. Start by putting things in their place. One of the things I like to think about is how my home can be like a home hotel. What I mean by that is, I want my home

to have the warmth of a home, the comfort of a home. But I want it to have the organization of a hotel. Have you ever noticed when you go into a hotel, the hairdryer is in one of the drawers, the ironing board is in the same place, the steamer whatever it may be everything has a place. Start by figuring out what deserves a place in your home and what that place is. One of my favorite exercises from Marie Kondo was this idea of items that spark joy. What's the first thing you see in the morning?

Is it a messy desk? Or is it a picture of your family that makes you feel happy? What's the first thing in the morning? Is it the dishes that haven't been done from last night? Or is it a piece of art that inspires you? What's the first thing you see when you get back from work? Is it a disorganized cupboard or is it a closet that has everything in the right place? When you change what you see first thing in the morning, first thing when you come back from work and last thing before you go to bed,

you transform your day. And the third reason why this is so important is a cluttered bedroom can negatively impact sleep quality. Studies have shown that people sleeping in cluttered rooms are more likely to experience sleep disturbances, including difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep. So if you're one of those people that's just been struggling to fall asleep, to get a good night's sleep, to get into REM sleep, and you're wondering why is it? I'm eating early, trying to work out, I am tired. It could be the clutter in your bedroom.

Let it go. And one thing that we often overlook is clutter is connected to emotional wellbeing. Clutter is associated with negative emotions such as confusion, tension and irritability. And conversely, an organized home can promote feelings of calmness and a sense of wellbeing. Here's what I want you to do.

I don't want you to feel guilty if your home is messy. Mine is too. I don't want you to feel guilty if your home is messy. Mine is too. I don't want you to feel shame if your cupboards are not organized. Mine need work too. Here are the practical steps. Number one, start small. Tackle one area at a time. You don't need to fix your whole home this week.

Pick one area, one drawer, one corner of a room to focus on this week. It literally could be one drawer. It could be the kitchen cupboard you open up every day. Could be a refrigerator that you open up every morning. Just start with one place. Second step is set a timer. Dedicate 30 minutes of your week to clean that space. You've got 30 minutes to do it.

Make it a task, make it an experiment, make it almost a challenge. Can I get this done in 30 minutes? Can I get this done in 60 minutes? Setting a timer gives you a sense of not only making it more manageable, but you can be competitive with it. Can almost turn it into a game.

And the third step is when you do that, create spaces for each of the items. A place where the milk goes, a place where the bread goes, a place where everything else goes. Be really clear so that you can actually stick to it. Spiritual truth number three that will stop you from overthinking is one of my favorite Buddhist teachings is pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. Pain is a reality, suffering is the story we create around it. In Buddhism there's a powerful story called the two arrows. Imagine you're struck by an arrow. This arrow represents pain and it's unavoidable.

Throughout our days, throughout our weeks, we'll have so many arrows thrown at us. But if you react by lamenting, blaming or agonizing over why you were struck, it's like shooting yourself with a second arrow. This second arrow symbolizes your suffering. It's entirely optional, created by your reaction. This story shows us that we can't avoid pain in life. There's always going to be sorrow, stress and pressure. But the story we create around it and how we react to it turns it into progress or suffering. A lot of our overthinking is all about why did this happen to me?

Who did this to me? Why would they do that to me? And while those are important questions and I'm not saying to shun them away or hide from them, but we've got to move forward from them because otherwise that arrow stays inside of us and that second arrow penetrates even deeper. When we can shift that story to instead of why is this happening to me all the way through to well what can I do about it? What skill is this asking me to develop? What is this reminding me that I've forgotten? What wisdom is inside of this that I need to learn? As soon as you shift to a solution proactive approach you don't have the

suffering. You will always have the pain. You don't have to suffer from it. This is an advertisement from BetterHelp. We've made real progress in how we talk about mental health. But there's still a stigma that holds people back. So many avoid therapy because they're afraid of being judged. But when we don't get the help we need, it doesn't just affect us. It impacts our relationships, our work and our communities. This Mental Health Awareness Month, let's remind each other that asking for support isn't a weakness, it's a strength. BetterHelp has been connecting people to licensed therapists for over 10 years, with a network of credentialed professionals across a wide range of specialties. It's fully online, serving over 5 million people worldwide,

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jays top three. Calling all nine niners now streaming. It's the More Better podcast with two episodes of Brooklyn Nine-Nine Fun. Host Stephanie Beatriz and Melissa Fumero welcome two friends and former castmates. Don't miss Gina Linetti herself, the talented Chelsea Peretti, as she sits down to laugh and swap stories. Like Andre would always be like,

try something, they're like, do less. Do less. Yeah, we do less all the time. But then some of the biggest episode as the more better amigas sit down with Joe Lattrullio, aka Detective Charles Boyle. There'll be more laughs, more conversation, more stories from the set, and more, more better. Both episodes are now available. You felt safe enough to fill out a bad idea, right?

I mean, that is the key because you're definitely not throwing out good ideas all the time. I mean, that's just not how it works. Listen to More Better with Stephanie and Melissa on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You are cordially invited to the hottest party in professional sports. I'm Tisha Olin, former golf professional and the host of Welcome to the Party, your newest obsession about the wonderful world that is women's golf. Featuring interviews with top players on tour like LPGA superstar Angel Yin.

I really just sat myself down at the end of 2022 and I was like, look, either we make it or we quit. Expert tips to help improve your swing and the craziest stories to come out of your friendly neighborhood country club. The drinks were flowing. They were like, torquing all over the place, vaping, they're shotgunning, they're pissing in the middle of the course. Women's golf is a wild ride, full of big personalities, remarkable athleticism, fierce competition, and a generation of women hell bent on shanking that glass ceiling. Welcome to the Party with Tisha Allen is an iHeart Women's Sports Production

in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. Listen to Welcome to the Party. That's P-A-R-T-E-E on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. I want to share with you insights from a study on acceptance and emotional pain. Research published in the Clinical Psychology Review in 2016 shows acceptance strategies significantly reduced emotional suffering. Participants who learned acceptance and mindfulness techniques reported a nearly 50% reduction in emotional distress and a stronger ability to cope effectively compared to those resisting

or trying to avoid that pain. Just think about for a second when you're trying to avoid pain you actually accumulate more of it. When you learn to accept pain you can actually release yourself from it. It's almost counterintuitive if you think about it. When you're trying to avoid pain you actually think more about the pain. When you accept the pain, you actually have the ability to move forward and move on. I want to give you a two-step method to help you do that. Step one is stop and interrupt the story. When you feel overwhelmed by negative emotions, visualize a bold mental red stop sign.

And you can even say it out loud, stop. What is the psychological benefit of this? It activates the prefrontal cortex, interrupting automatic emotional reactions and giving you mental space. Usually we have no space between what we experience and how we react. When you visualize a stop sign, when you even say out loud to your mind, stop, you actually create space for you to react. Step two is shift. Shift your mind immediately into a solution oriented state by asking powerful reframing questions. For example, what's one helpful thing I can do right now? How can I see this as an opportunity or learning experience? And my personal favourite, if I wasn't feeling upset, how would I

respond differently? I love that third one because when we're upset we often always respond poorly to a situation. How many times have you said something you didn't want to say because you were upset and later regretted it? How many times have you done something you didn't want to do because you're upset, only to realize later that you wish you held back? You can create that space in the moment when you stop and shift. The next spiritual principle that can stop you from overthinking is another one from the Bhagavad Gita,

where it says the mind can be your best friend or your worst enemy. Have you ever felt that a lot of your time is spent fighting people in your head, in your mind? You're literally running play-by-play every conversation you might have with someone. You want to raise an argument, you want to solve a discussion, you want to confront someone and often we do none of that in reality. We do it all in our mind. When you realize that having difficult conversations in reality

actually solves the overthinking you do in your mind, you're free from it. If there's someone that has been annoying you, frustrating you, frustrating you, causing you concern and you feel constantly triggered by them, it's great to write down your thoughts, organize them and then have that conversation in real. It will save you weeks of complaining, comparing, criticizing, venting,

which we can do again and again and again about the same person. Let it go and move on. The final spiritual truth I wanted to share with you is don't delay what can be done today. How many of you put off replying to that message because you're scared of confrontation or a disagreement, but then forget to reply at all How many of you keep saying next week will be the week that I start to take on that new habit

We're constantly postponing and delaying what can be done today You can change your life by one decision one choice and one moment if you simply do today what doesn't need to be delayed. One of the biggest things I see is when we don't want to let someone down. Someone invites you to something and you put off the RSVP to the last minute. You know you didn't want to go but you waited till the night before or the moment before now that person's upset. Right?

The truth is true kindness lies in clarity of intention, not silence out of fear. When you're tempted not to respond for fear of disappointing someone, remember that compassion isn't about avoiding discomfort. It's about expressing your truth with grace. If you don't message someone back because you don't want to let them down, you just let them down by not messaging them back. Chances are you messaging them last minute is going to let them down even more than if you explained how you felt weeks before when you received the message.

Don't let the fear of letting someone down block you from communicating your truth. Communicate your reasons honestly, yet gently. This works because your clarity transforms misunderstanding into deeper connection. clarity transforms misunderstanding into deeper connection. It shifts the focus from rejection to mutual respect and authenticity. I hope that these spiritual truths make a difference in your life and help you stop overthinking. I hope that you will listen to this again, make notes, try out some of the exercises and watch how your life changes. I'm Jay Shetty. Thank you for listening to On Purpose. And remember, I'm forever in your corner and I'm always rooting for you.

If you love this episode, you'll really enjoy my episode with Selena Gomez on befriending your inner critic and how to speak to yourself with more compassion. My fears are only going to continue to show me what I'm capable of. The more that I face my fears, the more that I feel I'm gaining strength, I'm gaining wisdom, and I just wanna keep doing that. This podcast is supported by BetterHelp,

offering licensed therapists you can connect with via video, phone, or chat. Here's BetterHelp Head of Clinical Operations, Heshew Jo, discussing who can benefit from therapy. I think a lot of people think that you're supposed to be going to therapy once you're like having panic attacks every day, but before you get to that point, I think once you start even noticing that you feel

a little bit off and you can't maintain this harmony that you once had in relationships, that could be a sign that maybe you want to go talk to somebody. There's always a benefit in talking to someone because we can all benefit from improved insight about ourselves and who we are and how we behave with other people. So if you're human, that's like a good indicator that you could benefit from talking to somebody. Find out if therapy is right for you. Visit betterhelp.com today. That's betterHELP.com.

Welcome to My Legacy. I'm Martin Luther King III. And together with my wife, Andrea Waters King, and our dear friends, Mark and Craig Kilburger, we explore the personal journeys that shape extraordinary lives. Join us for heartfelt conversations with remarkable guests like David Oyelowo, Mel Robbins, Martin Sheen, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, and Billy Porter. Listen to My Legacy on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is My Legacy.

I'm Emi Olaya, host of the podcast, Crumbs. For years, I had to rely on other people to tell me my story. And what I heard wasn't good. You really f***ed up last night. It felt like I lived most of my life in a blackout. I was trapped in addiction. I had to grab the lamp and smashed it against the walls. And then I decided I wanted to tell my own story. Listen to Krumz on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.