On Purpose with Jay Shetty - Sean Callagy: The #1 Skill That Controls Your Income (Use THIS 90/10 Rule to Build Trust and Create More Opportunities)
Episode Date: April 22, 2026Sometimes it’s not your situation holding you back, it’s the story you’ve been telling yourself about it. Jay sits down with entrepreneur and speaker Sean Callagy to explore what it ...truly means to live with freedom, purpose, and influence. They reflect on how many of us are shaped, often unconsciously, by limiting beliefs formed through family, society, and early experiences, and how those narratives can quietly define what we believe is possible. Sean offers a powerful reframe of success, not as external achievement, but as becoming “unblinded,” learning to see our own potential clearly and make decisions that are no longer driven by fear. Through deeply personal stories, including his journey of gradually losing his vision, he shares how adversity can become a catalyst for urgency, clarity, and growth, rather than a limitation. Jay and Sean examine the invisible barriers that hold people back, especially the conflicting messages we carry about money, identity, and self-worth. Sean explains that many people struggle not because they lack ability, but because they’ve been conditioned to believe success requires suffering or that wealth compromises integrity. He reframes influence as the most powerful human skill, the ability to create meaningful “yeses” with others through trust, empathy, and genuine value. Throughout the conversation, they share practical ways to begin shifting these patterns, from developing deeper listening skills to building more authentic connections, highlighting that real influence isn’t about manipulation, but about making people feel truly seen, heard, and understood. In this episode you'll learn: How to Break Free from Limiting Beliefs How to Influence Others with Integrity How to Take the Next Best Step in Life How to Reframe Fear into Opportunity How to Create Value That Attracts People How to Master the Art of Meaningful Conversations How to Turn Adversity into Purpose How to Build a Life of Freedom and Fulfillment You are more capable than you think, and your path doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. When you choose to learn, to listen deeply, and to show up with intention, you begin to create opportunities, not just for yourself, but for others too. Welcome to the world’s first AI-driven business enablement system built on the Unblinded Formula, ACTi, where artificial intelligence meets human actualization. To learn more, visit https://acti.ai/ With Love and Gratitude, Jay Shetty JAY’S DAILY WISDOM DELIVERED STRAIGHT TO YOUR INBOX Join 900,000+ readers discovering how small daily shifts create big life change with my free newsletter. Subscribe here: https://news.jayshetty.me/subscribe Check out our Apple subscription to unlock bonus content of On Purpose! https://lnk.to/JayShettyPodcast What We Discuss: 00:00 Intro 00:57 What Does Success Really Mean? 02:15 Breaking Free from Limiting Beliefs 04:38 What’s Actually Holding You Back? 07:57 The Beliefs You Didn’t Choose (But Still Control You) 11:53 Losing His Vision And What It Changed Forever 14:32 When the Dream You Built No Longer Fits 17:32 What to Do When You Don’t Know What’s Next 20:40 Rebuilding When Life Doesn’t Go to Plan 22:45 Feeling Stuck? Start Here 25:45 The Mindset Shift That Changes Everything 29:59 The #1 Skill That Makes People Say “Yes” 34:47 Starting Over Without Losing Yourself 35:51 The Moment You Choose Courage Over Comfort 39:04 Your First Real Move in Business 40:36 Why Failure Is the Fastest Way Forward 44:42 When Money Stops Feeling So Hard 48:30 If You Don’t Believe It, No One Else Will 51:35 Creating Value People Actually Care About 58:01 Turning Effort Into Real Results 01:02:18 Growing Beyond Yourself (Scaling What Works) 01:04:26 What It Really Takes to Lead People 01:07:15 Becoming Someone People Can’t Ignore 01:11:36 AI, Work, and What’s Coming Next 01:13:06 The Identity Shift That Changes Your Life 01:17:09 Designing the Next Version of You 01:20:36 Becoming Proof That Change Is Possible 01:24:52 Sean on Final Five Episode Resources: Website | https://unblindedmastery.com/ Website | https://callagylaw.com/ YouTube | https://www.youtube.com/@SeanCallagy Facebook | https://www.facebook.com/seanrcallagy/ Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/seanrcallagy/ LinkedIn | https://www.linkedin.com/in/seancallagy Unblinded with Sean CallagySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose, the place you come to become the happier, healthier, and more healed.
Today I am joined by Sean Callagy, entrepreneur, speaker and the founder of Unblinded,
a company that has helped thousands of entrepreneurs, leaders and professionals transform the way
they communicate, influence and connect with others.
Today we're breaking down how to read people, build trust faster and develop the kind of
presence that can change your career, your relationships and your life.
Please welcome to On Purpose, Sean Callagy.
Sean, it is so great to have you here in this studio. Thank you for being here.
Well, Jay, you're too kind. It's an honor and privilege to be in your space, everything you've created.
Thank you for having me here today.
Sean, I feel like my audience and I have so much to learn from you.
And I feel there are so many areas we could begin.
And when I was preparing for this interview, I was thinking I could go in a million different ways.
But where I want to start is simple, but I believe it's poignant.
How do you define success?
I define success from a place of freedom, unblindness, with a lack of human constraint.
So simply put, when people understand the truth, the relevant truth for their life journey,
they make conscious free decisions not polluted by the limiting beliefs and fears of all the people
who've been around them since birth, and they decide to pursue that and dynamically recreate it
as life shifts and changes, and they live as close to what they've been.
decide to live as possible, that is how I define success. And your mission, you use the word there,
your mission is to help the world become unblinded. What does that mean? To see what people don't
see about the exponential acceleration of the more they desire, people would like more abundance,
more abundance in their finances, more abundance in their time and scaling and leverage with
integrity, and of course more leverage in their magic. And I use magic for everything besides money
in time. Purpose, fulfillment, gratitude, contribution, all the things that are higher vibrational
ways that people can feel better about themselves and support others in doing the same.
Do you really believe that the reason why people are not successful, happy, abundant, joyful,
fill in the blank, is because they have limiting beliefs about what they can achieve?
I do. People have enormous limiting beliefs, and they're often hidden.
I think people don't know how to.
What is that how to?
How to is always relevant to the outcome people desire,
making that conscious, unbonded choice towards it.
But if we're in a capitalist structure,
like the United States of America,
I know you have listeners from all around the world,
but if people in a place of capitalism
where money has some degree of relevance, right,
we create purchasing power for food, for shelter,
for the beautiful home you enjoy here
and so many of your listeners
either have or desire to have, money has relevance, right? So what I tell people all the time is,
I believe that there's a hierarchy of how we pursue the more we desire, and people get incredibly
confused about that hierarchy. So I often talk to people about this first limiting belief,
which is that money requires stress, friction, and suffering on an enduring basis.
My discovery of all of this was because I was going to go blind and be broke, and I didn't know
how to not be blind and broke, like all the people in my family with this hereditary eye disease.
75% of people like me are unemployed, blind people.
To put into a simple headline, I believe that people first have to discover this truth.
That to create their greatest degree of freedom is because you have lived this truth.
You have achieved the only human attainable superpower, and it's the ability to, with integrity,
influence other human beings to say yes.
And yes is in a sale, it's not marketing,
it's not just management or leadership.
Everything is on the other side
for human beings of yeses,
but yeses that should happen,
not yeses that we manipulate and pressure.
And once human beings realize
that this is the freedom of opportunity of creation
from every spiritual leader to political leader,
to business leader, to sports coach,
and every happy family,
is because yeses happen together.
And once people realize
that the creation of yes,
and its mastery is at the center of all that will help us live in our greatest purpose and why,
then we begin the journey.
I want to talk about your journey, Sean, in a moment,
because I can't even begin to tell you how moved I am, learning about it, understanding it,
me and you today.
But what do you think is holding most people back from the life that you're talking about?
What's restricting them?
What are they getting wrong?
It's first because we are provided so many conflicting messages from,
birth. I grew up in a household that didn't have resources. My parents were divorced when I was
one year old. My mom pushed a hot dog cart in Jersey City, New Jersey for a while to make a living.
And I was told by my beautiful grandparents, including my blind grandfather with my same eye
condition, that someday I'd be a doctor. That was their placeholder for being successful, right?
They didn't understand what success was, but doctors were successful because they had some money
and resources, so I was told I would be a doctor someday. But at the same time, I was told by my grandparents,
to have money, had to be a bad person. So I, like most people, were given conflicting messages
continuously. I went to Catholic grammar school. And I was told children are seen, not heard,
who were told to shut up and sit down. And we were told so many things that would limit us over time
that couldn't help but play out into our future. Then, as a high school, after,
I was blessed and privileged with great leadership, and these were great leaders that taught us how to win and be a team.
But what we weren't taught is how to translate those principles into our adult life of freedom, abundance, joy, and happiness.
So why I believe, to answer your question directly, that so many people struggle, Jay, is because they're provided massive amounts of conflicting messages that are imprecise, generalized, and often false, that doesn't help them understand.
kind of a beautiful, abundant, happy, integrist life in a capitalist structure.
It's fascinating how people from different walks of life can have very similar messages,
even though those messages are very gayed. So I like you, I often joke that I had three options
growing up, either to be a doctor, a lawyer, or a failure. That's what my parents and family
had put before me. I chose the third option. I did not become a doctor or a lawyer. So you did better
than me on that from my parents' perspective, building what you've built. And then also on the other
side of it, I was also told that people who have money are bad. And when we'd see someone who
had money, whether it was a family friend or someone's home that we visited, it would always be that
they did something dodgy to get that or that there was something, you know, on toward about how
they processed money in their lives. And that planted some really deep seeds in me. And I think all of us
have a relationship with money, success, value, purpose, mission expectation that comes from that,
how did you begin to unravel and picket those early definitions of success, wealth, value for yourself?
And then how do you teach others to do that?
Thank you for this question because it brought tears to my eyes because I easily couldn't have
found that truth because it was 1997, 27 years old.
I didn't become an attorney to be rich.
I became an attorney to not go blind and be broke.
So I applaud your courage in resisting what your parents shared.
I didn't have any type of leadership like that or thought or some incredible speaker like you discovered who brought you down a different pathway.
I just had, okay, doctor or a lawyer because they don't want to be broke.
So I became an attorney and I won the game of law school because I discovered how to win it.
I was very good at figuring out from my sports background,
how is this game structured and how do you play it?
How do you win it with integrity?
So I got a big job at a big law firm,
and I realized this was not going to create financial abundance
in the first few months that I became incredibly depressed.
I was unbelievably scared,
and I discovered that it was those attorneys that marketed
and generated business that had freedom.
And I had such a deep negative association
to anything marketing and selling.
So I was going to quit.
I was going to become a high school baseball coach and football coach.
Do something my heart and soul knew could be good
because I couldn't see how marketing and selling could be good.
I had a miracle happen.
I went to my chiropractor, was a mentor of mine,
told him I was going to quit.
He said, before you do, read Anthony Robbins' book,
Awaken the Giant Within.
I said, I don't know who that is.
He said, go get this book.
and what Tony's work did for me
is it permitted me to reframe meaning.
It asked me the question like, is that true?
Is that always true?
He taught me that question.
And I start saying, is it really true
that marketing is bad and evil?
And I came to the conclusion,
that's not true at all.
Because, Jay, what I had done in law school
is I had began to develop my influence skill sets.
And I'd also begin to think about injustice
and inequity and the incredible complications
with our legal system and real challenges.
And what I began to think is I'm being suppressed in this law firm of hundreds of attorneys
built on a financial model that's non-integrous because they are not permitting me to create
the value for clients I can create.
They're using me to put me in a library.
You know, they're not bad people, but this is what the structure was.
I said, and quite frankly, I'm better at influence than virtually anybody in this building.
I was a two-time national moot court champion in law school.
and I'm like, there's not anybody here
that I'm finding
that can be more persuasive
and influential than I can.
So I quit my job,
I had no money,
I was petrified,
I knew nothing about business.
So I began to look everywhere I possibly could
and I couldn't find answers and solutions,
but I started on my credit card,
my own law firm at 27 years old.
They offered me psychological counseling at my job.
My family was losing their mind,
but I was committed to find out
if there's a way to win the game,
of freedom with integrity and heart and love in a capitalist structure. And I found that there was.
Talk to me about when you first discovered your condition and learned about it and how it slowly
started to affect your life in such a deep way. Yeah, 17 years old, I'm going to get my license.
All I care about is getting my driver's license. My mom knows I'm going blind since I'm five.
She tells me it's 17, so she kept this a secret for 12 years.
And I was, again, a peak performance athlete in high school and baseball, football, wrestling.
I had no idea.
And truth, she didn't want me to get my driver's license.
So she couldn't have gifted me with a better time to tell me, because I wasn't devastated.
All I wanted was my license.
So I wasn't focused on the fact that I'm going to eventually go blind.
I was focused on how do I convince my mother and prove to her that I'm safe enough to get my license.
I did, so I got my license at 17, and it wasn't anything that serious yet.
And as I went through the next decade of my life, it took my baseball career from me,
it didn't allow me go on to play professionally, and it slowly eroded, but it was a slow thief.
They say retinas pigmentosa is this thief that almost apologizes for what it's taking of your vision.
I had the ability to read pretty finely until my mid-30s.
I stopped driving around 40.
I stopped on the read around 42.
I'm 56 now.
So I was really functionally blind,
unable to watch television by 43, 45.
But each of these were just slowly being taken over time.
So it gave me this unbelievable privilege of adjusting at each stage
and also gave me the gift of massive urgency
to get ahead of this
so I could be sitting somewhere
like I am right now with you
using my voice and my influence
my communication skillsets
and having built a team
so I wouldn't be dependent upon things
I could no longer do.
When I hear you,
I hear so much gratitude and positivity
and optimism when I see you on stage
if anyone's not seen Sean on stage
go on YouTube right now
and literally type in Sean Gallagher
watching you on stage is incredible
like the energy that you command
and the interaction you have with the audience
and the engagement you have,
like it's unbelievable.
I just feel like the natural inkling,
if I was told that at 17,
would be to go inward and feel more depressed
and lost and confused and stuck.
And I think a lot of our listeners
would agree that their natural gut reaction
would be to decompose
as opposed to go in the direction you did.
Were there moments of despair
and stress and pain where you just said,
I wish this wasn't happening to me.
I hate what's happening to me.
Like, if you could kindly go there,
I know it's vulnerable and it's personal,
but I want to hear about what was going through your head
when you first were told about the condition
that obviously you said was in your family.
So when I was first told it wasn't a challenge,
but when it really was brutal,
was during my college baseball career.
I was runner-up for Ivy League rookie of the year.
I was a starting player as a freshman.
I had an incredible career.
I knew.
I didn't think I knew I was going to go on to play professional baseball.
I didn't know I'd make the major leagues, but I knew I'd get drafted.
And college baseball became this incredible dichotomy of immense success, batting, and greater and greater fear building in the field.
So my first experience with the reality of my eye condition was when I started to struggle seeing fly balls in the outfield and couldn't get the jump I got.
So I would be out there as this immense leader, and I'm very humbly.
I'm uniquely athletic.
I worked very hard.
I was blessed with great speed, professional speed.
I had major league baseball speed and athletic ability.
And I'd be sitting there, Jay, praying the ball wouldn't be hit to me.
And it was this horrible, horrible feeling.
And several times, including as a unanimous senior captain, you know, returning one allegedly,
one of the best players in America coming into my senior year,
certainly in the East Coast,
and I'm out there praying the ball doesn't get hit to me.
We're playing at West Point, Army,
so is the Ivy League plus Army and Navy,
fly ball gets hit to me.
I don't see it.
Three-run score, we lose the game,
and I'm the captain, on the leader.
Jay, in my life, I had never felt more selfish.
I said, you're selfish.
You don't belong on this field.
You're not capable of doing this anymore.
You could be a designated hitter,
not in the outfield,
and I walked into my coach crying and said,
I'm a horrible leader.
I have failed you.
I failed this team.
Do not ever put me in the outfield again.
I can't do this anymore.
I don't deserve to be here.
And I would say that and a little while later,
the Major League Baseball draft occurs.
I don't get drafted.
I knew by that point I wasn't going to be.
I still had this like, you know, miracle hope for it.
And those three days, I'd say with the only three days in my life,
I felt sorry for myself and gave myself that permission,
almost mourning the dream that was, and it was brutal.
And it was painful because I had no desire to be a business person.
I want to play sports.
That's all I want to do.
I want to teach sports.
I wanted to play sports.
I want to coach sports.
And it was taken.
And I had to let that dream die at 22 years old and then begin to recreate my life.
How do you let your dream die when you can't see what's next?
It was 1992 was the worst year of my life.
I've never had a problem of drinking.
I've had alcohols in my family.
So I've really been blessed by, I don't drink coffee.
I'm not a drinker.
I've never done a drug in my life.
And I don't judge it at all.
I have great empathy for people, you know, in those spaces.
But in 1992, I worked for one year after not getting drafted before figuring out I would go to law school.
And I went out after work every day.
And I go to Happy Hour.
And, you know, I was in New York City.
And I was working in a bank on Park Avenue.
I was making no money, but I looked like I was doing something meaningful.
I wear a suit to work every day and carry a briefcase and my family was proud of me.
And I was so lost.
I was so scared.
I was so unfulfilled.
And I could easily see how people could begin to drink and could begin to womanize and could begin to do drugs.
And I didn't do drugs.
I didn't womanize.
But I drank more than I would like.
And I just began to see how lower vibrational activity could suck us in.
if you don't find your purpose
and live your life on purpose.
So I began to recreate what that purpose was
and I didn't know what I would ultimately do.
I definitely did not want to be a lawyer.
Like I knew that.
But I saw a law school as a way
to hopefully be able to support a future family
and at least the next right step.
So for anybody struggling out there,
I would say I don't think it's knowing,
you know, we live a world
where a high school teachers
or college professors
or graduate school professors
are always telling us about our future and our life.
I always said, just take the next step.
So for me, law school was just the next step.
I was in the beginning of recreation.
I didn't know what it would ultimately be.
I knew what was dead, but I also had heroes like Batman and James Bond
and the miracle on ice as a child.
And I, in Rocky, and Muhammad Ali,
and I knew that people who believed found a way.
So I believed I would find a way.
and I saw law school as the next best step.
I wasn't certain it was, but I didn't have a better choice.
So I always, you know, share with people, make an aggressive decision, make a commitment,
take the next step, do it as successfully as you can as things dynamically unfold for the next door.
I love the idea of the next best step.
I couldn't agree with you more.
I think in my life, all I've ever tried to do is take the next best step.
And I think the mistake is we don't take enough next best steps and we forget.
get that it's a staircase and we start treating it like our home. So that step becomes your home and
then eventually becomes your prison and then you live on that step. And if you saw someone standing
on a staircase and they were just stuck on the same step, you'd be like, hey, why don't you take the
next step? And so talk to me about that idea. Actually, there's so many things I want to unpack
with you here. You're just truly just sitting here with you gets me so inspired and excited for
the potential for people to listen to this episode. When you're learning,
about your condition, you're feeling the effects of it. It's taking away your baseball career.
You know, the blindness is getting worse. This is hereditary. It's in your family. Are you able to
take inspiration from how they've dealt with it? Does that help? Do they have insight? Is it valuable?
Or are you really having to search for it externally? Most people in my family who had my eye
condition were blind, relatively broke and alcoholic. Except my grandfather, my mother's father,
my mother's father, but he did not achieve meaningful financial abundance, but they made incredibly
strategic decisions my grandmother and my grandfather with his condition. So I didn't learn about business
from my grandparents. I learned a lot about family, incredible things about love, caring, empathy,
was driven into my soul. And my grandfather was powerful. He was strong. When you think of blind people,
you think weak, timid, incapable.
My grandfather would yell at drug dealers
and pimps in Jersey City
that as their neighborhood decayed
to stop taking advantage of people,
to stop hurting people.
He was a fearless, Zeus energy,
powerful human being
that stood for women, underdogs,
the oppressed, the challenge.
And my grandfather taught me,
respectfully to take S from no one and to love everyone, right?
He was a protector.
People said to my grandfather,
he would love you to death and sometimes scare you to death.
And this became a framework that I learned from him
and my high school athletic coaches
to be a stand for people, to be a protector,
to be a guardian and a guide.
So, yes, my grandfather taught me a lot about that,
which sent me searching for the truth,
of how to make business finances work for me,
and then if I could, then to teach others the same.
If someone's listening right now and they feel stuck
because their dream just ended,
or maybe they don't even know what their dream is,
what can they do in the next 24 hours to get unstuck?
Most important thing I would share with people,
and this feels so trite to say,
but I will, and I'll give two inches, that's okay, Jay.
Yeah, please.
Is to put endorphins in your body 12 times a day.
the greatest drug people can take,
and I just finished reading Charlie Sheen's book,
I had the privilege of interviewing Charlie,
and I understand that in the book he talked about crack
and the feeling I've never done drugs and cocaine and testosterone and steroids
and all sorts of stimulants that can do things in your body,
I believe the greatest super drug that provides love, a feeling of love,
gratitude, abundance, power, strength, aspirational vision, or endorphins.
And I also believe that people understand this at some level
for people who get a runner's high or go out and lift.
But what I've never heard anyone talk about until recently,
and I've been talking about this for years now,
is microdosing endorphins all day.
So if somebody is stuck 12 times today for 60 seconds or less,
put endorphins in your body.
Do push-ups, bodyweight squats, crunches,
not walking, not jumping jacks,
it doesn't get you there in 60 seconds.
but put endorphins in your body.
And if you're in, you're disabled, you're a quadriplegic,
blink your eyes, make muscles with your face,
do anything that will release endorphins for 60 seconds.
If you don't have that challenge, get on the ground and do this.
It's going to create a completely different reality.
Our biochemistry is a filter for a reality.
So I always tell people, start with your biochemistry.
But then second, realize that you're a mastery of the influence and yes causing,
that I'm right on the cusp,
but being an introvert and extrovert.
So I wasn't a person, Jay and everybody out there
who was charismatic growing up.
In fact, I was very shy.
I wasn't the guy asking girls out.
I wasn't the person who was the cool guy.
I ran for class president in seventh grade.
I got two votes.
True story of my 115 person class
because my speech was so God awful
because it wasn't my words.
It was so inauthentic, right?
So what I tell people is put endorphins in your body 12 times today
and begin to study influence.
Not how you pitch, hook or close, horrible words,
lose those words, not how you funnel,
not how you objectify anyone or anything,
but how you cause other human beings
to be seen and heard and understood.
It's what Oprah Winfrey said
is why she held a microphone for 30,000 people,
and it's not a soft skill,
it's the skill set.
Begin to learn it and master it today
with absolute love and integrity,
and everything will become unstuck.
The release of endorphins and the physical movement is such a huge one, I feel, for like you're saying, everyone who possibly can can make a shift in their lives.
Hi, this is Joe Winterstein, host of the Spirit Daughter podcast, where we talk about astrology, natal charts, and how to step into your most vibrant life.
And I just sat down with a mini driver.
The Irish traveler said when I was 16, you're going to have a terrible time with men.
actor, storyteller, and unapologetic Aquarian visionary. Aquarius is all about freedom-loving and different perspectives, and I find a lot of people with strong placements in Aquarius are misunderstood.
A son and Venus and Aquarius in her seventh house spark her unconventional approach to partnership.
He really has taught me to embrace people sleeping in different rooms, on different houses and different places, but just an embracing of the isness of it all.
If you're navigating your own transformation or just want a chart-side view into how a leading artist
integrates astrology, creativity, and real life, this episode is a must listen.
Listen to the Spirit Daughter podcast starting on February 24th on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your podcast.
Hey, I'm Nora Jones, and I love playing music with people so much that my podcast called Playing Along
is back.
I sit down with musicians from all musical styles to play songs together in an intimate.
setting. Every episode's a little different, but it all involves music and conversation with some of
my favorite musicians. Over the past two seasons, I've had special guests like Dave Grohl,
Lave, Mavis Staples, Remy Wolf, Jeff Tweedy, really too many to name. And this season, I've sat down
with Alessia Cara, Sarah McLaughlin, John Legend, and more. Check out my new episode with Josh Grobin.
You related to the Phantom at that point. Yeah, I was definitely the Phantom in that.
That's so funny.
Share each day with me each night, each morning.
Say you love me.
You know I...
So come hang out with us in the studio
and listen to Playing Along on the IHeart Radio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Ready for a different take on Formula One?
Look no further than no grip,
a new podcast tackling the culture of motor racing's most coveted series.
Join me, Lily Herman,
we dive into the under-explored pockets of F-1, including the astrology of the current grid.
Lewis Hamilton, Capricorn Sun, Cancer Moon.
Wouldn't you know it?
Michael Schumacher is also a Capricorn Sun, Cancer Moon.
The story of the sports most consequential driver strike.
We have one man who, upon hearing that he was going to be fired, freaked out,
and apparently climbed out the window of the bathroom.
And was Daniel Ricardo's illustrious F-1 career, a success story, a cautionary tale,
or some combination of both?
He started getting all this attention, and he maybe started to think, I'm bigger than this, I'm better, and plenty of other mishap scandals and sagas that have made Formula One a delightful, decadent, dumpster fire for more than 75 years.
Listen to No Grip on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
When you're talking about quitting your job, quitting law, realizing that it wasn't what you were going to do, I think there are so many of our listeners today who would say they're in a job right now.
that they've potentially thought about quitting at least more than once.
And maybe they've even got close, but then they've caved.
If someone's in that position right now of thinking about quitting their job
or doesn't like their job or isn't enjoying their job, isn't engaged,
we know that nearly 50% of US workers are disengaged in the workplace,
people are not feeling a sense of meaning and purpose.
What's the first thing that person should do before making that decision?
Before making that decision, again, I reemphasize 12 times,
a day, endorphins, do for 30 days.
Don't quit your job yet, right?
And second, begin to master influence
and accept this reality
that if you're unwilling
to face the greatest fear of people
have, which is that of rejection,
people say people fear death more than public
speaking, but people also fear
the rejection of others. There's a way
in a mechanism that doesn't feel
aggressive, harmful,
pushy, salesy
to cause integrous
yeses with human beings. This is the path
of freedom. If you refuse to accept that reality, then what I would tell people is begin to find,
make peace with the job you have, the life you have, and gain your purpose and fulfillment
outside of those working hours. I often tell people, become a police officer, become a teacher,
do something that doesn't require you to face that fear. But for the greatest degree of freedom,
what I would share people, Jay, is to find your way forward to facing that fear. It will be,
12 of the most challenging,
grueling months. It will be
like Daniel and the karate kid
with Mr. Miyagi. It will be like
Luke with Yoda. There'll be
so many moments of, or
Mike Arruzioni with Herb Brooks and the Miracle
and Ice team, so many
moments of doubt, of fear
because you're recreating your nervous
system and how it primarily
shares rejection as death.
And you can begin to reframe
your reality that rejection
doesn't exist. And we're the
with people that can ever possibly reject ourselves, right? Don't people who can reject us as us.
The reality, very simply, is 30 days of beginning to recreate this reality, but realizing that it's
on the outside of what is currently comfortable for us today that will find that freedom.
And Jay, when I quit my job in that law firm, it was the most grueling, brutal, scary,
horrifying 12 months of my life. I didn't have a single person.
around me who told me I should be doing this. And I had to find it in books and places like
people would find their work with you, Jay, and that piece, find it with Jay. Listen to him every day
as you recreate this reality, put endorphins in your body, and realize there's a path to freedom
like somebody like Jay has created and humbly somebody like myself has created. And that's what I would
tell people do today. And if you could find your way to this absolute commitment and realizing that
the causing of yes, leadership yeses, management, marketing or selling, recruitment yeses.
On the other side of yes is a higher compensation level.
Is a greater degree of economic freedom?
If you can make peace with this and you could pursue the how-to of mastering that,
then and only then would you be in a position where you should quit your job.
Until then, find your way to a decision of either making peace with being an employee
or making peace with yes-causing, which will be.
hold no judgment, but it will create the absolute freedom that somebody like Jay Shetty has.
If you want that, like him, you have to master the causing of yes with humans.
Yeah, you took me back to the first 12 months after I quit my job too, and I've done it a few times.
And so I can totally relate to that.
I fully agree.
And I appreciate that you don't make it sound easy or fantasy or aspirational.
It's tough and it's hard work.
You talked about mastering influence as being the core piece there.
If someone wants to start their journey of mastering influence in the next 30 days,
what should they do for the first seven, the second seven, the third and the fourth
for the next four weeks?
What do they do?
So what would you do in the first week is in every conversation you're in, 90% of the conversation
be doing the listening.
The 10% in which you're speaking would only be you asking,
open-ended questions, not closed-ended to people.
Who, what, when, where, why, how, not is, or, was, were.
None of that.
Wow.
How, when, why.
Then pause and say this.
What I'm hearing you say, Jay, is you love people.
You do this from your home when you don't have to do it anymore because you want people to be free.
You want their hearts to be fulfilled, that you want them to live the life.
that you've discovered, which is a purpose-filled life.
And even if people will false frame you
or criticize you as they have every incredible leader
from the dawn of time, from Christ to Buddha,
from everyone, you will do this
because you love people enough,
not to remove yourself from the world,
but continue to expand in this world.
Jay, am I hearing you correctly?
Yes, very accurate.
Yeah.
So do that, folks, for next week.
and master the depth of hearing people
by listening to what they're saying,
what they're not saying,
and don't ever do this.
Don't do this for seven days.
Hey, Jay, I heard you like the Lakers.
I like the Knicks.
That's called Level 1 listening
where you turn it back to yourself.
Don't talk about yourself for seven days
and watch how people begin to relate to you
and become drawn to you.
Second week is begin to transition
after you've reduced from 90%
to two-thirds listening.
Listen to people if you have 30 minutes
of somebody listen for 20.
In the end, say something like,
hey, so what I'm hearing you say is,
dot, dot, dot, am I hearing you correctly?
Don't reflect the surface,
reflect the heart and the soul.
And say, it would be okay
if I share a couple of things
that may or may not resonate with you.
Then, in that final third,
10 minutes, if it's a 30-minute meeting,
if it's an hour of the final 20 minutes,
begin to share some things
that are about who you are.
But after you spent the first week
practicing that the,
depth of listening. And now watch how you're received with people after you've created or create
this reciprocity with them from the listening. Those final two weeks for a month, then begin to
propose to people how you might do some things ongoingly. Maybe you're going to spend some time
speaking together. Maybe you're going to go to some programs. And, you know, and in no way am I trying
to be self-serving. This is what I do for a living. So if it's interesting, it resonates. We have
plenty of things to support you with. But that's what I would do in that first month. Week one, 90%
listening week two, two-thirds listening, where you're in deep reflection and acknowledgement.
And that final two weeks, you begin to propose doing some things and co-creating value people.
But there, and I say this, you know, Jay, and this could be easily misinterpreted.
This may be the most controversial thing I say all day.
I believe all people are created equal under God.
They're equally worthy of love.
They're equally worthy of respect.
Everyone, I love homeless people.
I love people who've stolen $2 million from me and someone has and I got my money back.
I love everyone unconditionally with boundaries, right? I do. And I'm clear that not all humans are currently
able to create equal value and all actions are not created equally. So in those final two weeks,
begin to think about who you want to add value to, who you want to be, the mouse that takes
the thorn out of the lion's foot. And Jay, I joined Tony Robbins Platinum partnership because I thought
someday I'd speak on this stage, and I immediately got there,
realized everybody thought that.
And in one night, my dreams died,
and the next morning they were reborn,
because I remembered what I teach,
that every human being has pain,
every human being,
the most influential humans in the world.
I do, J does, everyone does.
Everyone does.
And if we could learn that final two weeks,
how do we begin to become the mouse
that removes the thorn from the lion's foot,
that's what put me on Tony Robbins stage,
the very first day I got there,
and I believe it was a miracle from God a blessing,
and kept me there 19 more times
because I figured out how to create value,
not the value I thought they needed,
the value they believed they needed.
And when you do that in those final two weeks with people,
watch how your life changes
when you are the mouse, not the lion,
finding the lion with a thorn in their foot.
From a business perspective,
if you had to start from scratch again today,
How would you stop?
Only take advice from people
who are living the type of life you want to.
I'm divorced twice.
I have no horrors in my divorces.
There was no legal battles.
I have a fine relationship in both situations,
including an outstanding relationship
with my first wife,
this mother of my three oldest children.
We spend every Christmas morning together, et cetera.
However, you would not want to learn from me
how to stay married,
because I'm not married.
You would want to learn how to get divorced, have no controversy, and have an incredible relationship when you have children.
That I'm masterful at, right?
So only learn from the people who have that which you want to have and do not listen to anyone else.
That was the most foundationally critically important piece because everybody wanted to give me advice when I was fearful in my law firm job.
So if I went back in time, I would live that edict,
and then I would learn from the people
who had the type of life I wanted,
but not just the money.
You know, I wouldn't be studying God rest his soul,
Ozzy Osbourne, for how he became wealthy and successful.
I would find people at financial abundance
who were respected, who loved their life,
who lived the type of life that I wanted to live
that didn't require work to be continuous,
that went from an arduous place
to an abundant place in financial abundance, time abundance,
were massively contributing value to other people
in money, in wisdom, in love, and possibility.
And P.S., it doesn't always have to be money.
My grandparents were very successful people.
They gave massively an abundance of love and safety and family,
and they never had any financial resources.
So I would study people in every area, health, surfing,
that have the things you want to,
and then begin to reconcile those things.
That's what I did, and that's what I would do over again.
And what was the piece of advice you received at that time
from someone who'd already done what you wanted to do?
That was such a game changer.
The game changer for me, Jay,
was loving or respecting my grandmother, Nani,
and going to a garage sale with her,
having already begun to study Tony Robbins' work
and Jay Abraham's work,
but I was still missing pieces and I was still not understanding.
And this is one of the things I would always say about Tony.
I love him.
I honor him.
I respect him.
I can never repay him in a thousand lifetimes for all he's brought.
But I would say to Tony is, teach what you do, like truly in business, right?
And he didn't, right?
And he doesn't.
But a miracle happened for me honoring and loving my grandmother is we went to a garage sale.
I don't like garage sales.
But my grandmother did.
So I was being a good grandson.
I'm 28 years old.
I'm petrified trying to figure it out.
I've quit my job.
I've started my own business, my own law firm.
And there was a row of books.
And one of the books, the roll of dollar,
was how to make a fortune from public speaking.
My grandmother told me don't buy the book
unless I'll give it to you for a quarter.
I said, Nani, I don't think so.
I think I'll pay the dollar.
And the book, How to Make a Fortune of Public Speaking,
was life-altering.
Because it helped crystallize for me
this concept that influences the only attainable superpower,
and it taught me what you live
the power of the stage and the microphone.
And once I realized the power,
the stage in the microphone,
it didn't have to be like you have,
Jay, millions and millions and millions.
That's incredible.
But you can also have a stage in a microphone
with 15 of the right potential clients,
15 of the right potential partners.
It could be in a small restaurant
in the middle of Tuscaloosa, right?
But the power of the stage in the microphone
and gaining not only individual influence,
but group influence.
And once I saw that book and consumed it,
it then contextualized Tony Robbins for me.
It contextualized Oak Winfrey for me.
It contextualized George Washington,
founding fathers, Walt Disney, the NFL.
It gave me an understanding of a reality
that nothing ever had before.
So I would say to master influence individually
and in group dynamics
and to let go of all fear
and turn your attention to that.
What did you do with that?
What was the first step you took in business?
The first step I took, once I learned this,
was booking my first speaking engagement.
It was a free speaking engagement
at a university hospital in New Jersey
for 30 inner city children in Newark, New Jersey.
I spent three days preparing a 15-minute talk,
and at best, I was okay.
I had quotes from Greek philosophers
and these things for 15-minute talk.
And when I was done, I got in my car and I cried.
I said, I can't do this.
I'm not good at this.
Those kids needed somebody better
and something better.
That was my lower self speaking
and my selfish lower self
that wanted to protect me
and my higher self said that's a lie
that's just like baseball.
Just like when you were 10 years old
and you didn't start in a Little League all-star team
just like every moment, it's a journey.
And I recommitted and I began to find my way.
And so for people, what I would say to folks
is do what I just said for these 30 days
and try to book a speaking engagement
and be horrible.
Go speak to people in old age home.
Go see if they'll let you come in
and talk to eight people who you can shine up their memories and get in front of them and listen
to them and talk to them and try to facilitate something in front of them and be horrible.
Come into your car and cry when you're done and they go back and see if they'll have you back
and do it again. That's what I tell people to do.
I love that story, but I also love the way you worded it as your selfish lower self that was
telling you you weren't the right person, you didn't do a great job.
Talk to me how that's a selfish thought for anyone who's wondering how to you.
Does that make sense?
Yeah.
So I know this to be true.
Our survival brain wants to keep us safe.
It wants to give us certainty.
It wants to give us some level of significance.
It wants to destroy any concept of a growth mindset or higher self work that Dr. Dweck would talk about at Stanford and the growth mindset.
So the most selfish thing I believe we could do is to be engaged in false modesty.
I believe in humility.
I am not better.
we're all equal under our higher power called the universe
call it God, call whatever you like,
I know that to be true.
But we're not able to create equal value.
Tom Brady is not the same as the center
in the New England Patriots
who is not the same as the center
on a high school football team.
So when we have the capacity to do more
and we become unblinded to that reality
and we hide from it
and we pretend, oh, shucks,
I'm just Jay Shetty
and, you know, I'm nothing different
special and valuable, like that's just not true.
You have millions of people
that you, because of your influence,
have been able to cultivate as an audience.
You have power in this world
that is unique and valuable,
and you earned it.
And you had blessings,
and you had doors that opened,
but you earned it through your skill sets,
your mastery, right?
If you were to have said all these times,
I'm not worthy of interviewing Michelle Obama,
or I'm not interview, you know,
capable of interviewing Oprah.
Aw, shucks,
I am nobody to do that, you would have deprived the world of all the value and power you've created.
So for everybody out there, don't do that.
And the greatest moment that I learned about this was in my senior high school football, and we were playing the championship game.
And I knew that our best chance to win that game, an impossible situation, fourth and goal from the 20-yard line, in a tie game, I knew our best chance was to throw a pass to me.
I also knew that the great likelihood was that it wasn't going to work.
So I knew our best chance was for that to happen,
and I knew it probably wasn't going to work.
So what every part of my being told me is to do what I'd done for four years of high school athletics,
we're told to do, to shut my mouth, to say nothing,
and let the coach call to play.
But I knew that I had a great chance to beat this guy,
and I knew what had happened during the game.
I didn't know if the coaches knew.
So we called a timeout.
I jogged over to the sideline with our quarterback, which nobody ever does.
I said, coach, I swear to God on everything on my reputation that our best chance to throw this pass to me.
I swear to God, if you call this play, I will catch it and we will win the championship.
And I knew I was telling the truth and lying because I knew the coach may not run that play, but it was our best chance.
We ran the play. I caught the ball.
That was a blessing. It was good fortune, right?
But if I didn't do that, Jay, I would have been selfish to protect myself from being the goat forever, ever and ever to be told us, oh, this guy walked his sideline, he said he called for the ball, what an ego-driven, a-hole, that person was. That would have been my legacy. But my teammates, my coaches, my high school, everything had given me, they deserved me to do that. And that's the same thing I did in the Tony Robbins world when I first took the stage. I told them, I will cause more people to join a platinum partnership than anybody ever ever.
has, I will break every sales record imaginable, except the truth was I knew I would in that
situation. And it was scary. And I knew people would judge me for it. So what I would
encourage people to do is to engage in absolute humility, because none of those things make
me anything except the person I produced that result and don't make me better than anybody
else in the world. Except they make me uniquely capable of doing certain things that I'm more
capable of doing than others. So I don't engage in false modesty.
and I encourage others to do the same.
You've made multi-generational wealth in your life,
abundance, value.
What do you wish people knew about making money that they don't?
How easy it is, how hard it is for the first year,
and how easy it becomes from there,
because of how afraid people are
and how the value hierarchy of money is created.
Value and money are all about replacement cost, period.
So, and the hardest skill set to develop for people,
is the ability to cause yes in group dynamics of people.
It's why you're Jay.
It's why Oprah's Oprah, like run down the line of names we've said.
It's why presidents are presidents, right?
It's the hardest value to create in group influence.
The next hardest values individual influence to cause yes.
Once you realize that and you realize this,
to be an NBA player, MLB player, the things I dreamt of,
things many people dream of,
that is a very fixed, limited game.
where very few human beings are ever going to be Mike Tyson or, you know, a home run champion or the Los Angeles Laker.
But in business, so many people can become multimillionaires. So many people. So many more people.
And what I would offer to people is to realize it's easy if you will spend the one year, heck, you spent 12 years of under, you know, of secondary education and graduate education.
20 years in your education,
one year of building that influence
and realizing that then people want to work with you and for you
if you could teach them that pathway.
And Jay, this is the craziest thing.
I tell everyone the truth.
Nobody told me the truth when I came out of law school.
Nobody in that law firm told people
and I tell the people that work from me
and all of my businesses.
I tell people how this hierarchy works.
I tell people you can work here forever
and not be a yes causer.
As long as you're loyal to the same,
state admission, don't ever be loyal to me. If you ever see me breach integrity, tell the world,
but be loyal to the things we agree to. You do your job. You're going to be here forever and ever and ever.
But if you really want to make unique amounts of money and be financially free generationally,
then here's what you need to become masterful at. And I tell people that. And still with them
watching it, them watching people accelerate, still most people with everything right in front of
their face, they still don't make that choice. And I don't judge it. But I am telling people
the truth right now. And I'm telling people to make an informed decision and to realize how powerful
your fear is, how powerful that fear is, and that you can be free enough to overcome it. But if you're,
if you feel any resistance right now, listeners out there to what I'm sharing, it's because your
fear is telling you that you're hoping what I'm saying isn't true. And I'm leaning in, uh,
this directly because I love you. And maybe some of you won't like me for sharing, you know,
from my heart the truth, but if nobody told me this truth, I'd be blind and broke, and maybe
just maybe an alcoholic. And not only that, but I wouldn't have had the privilege of giving
away 120,000 toys for kids this Christmas, not from things I raised, from what I was able to give
directly. And the ability to cause that for people is something I would have stolen from kids
who would not have had Christmas this year. And I wouldn't feel the way I want to feel about
myself if I didn't do that. And that isn't manipulation. That's not reverse psychology. It's the
truth. You will someday face your deathbed. Who will you be on it is different from who you were
before this moment in this conversation where you could intentionally try to forget this truth.
But I encourage people to live in your greatest degree of love and freedom for people and never
feel ashamed, guilty, pressured, but to be free and free from the fear.
that other people have installed in you.
You've talked about this idea of cultivating a group yes and an individual yes,
and that being the quarter business, sales, this mastering of influence.
Talk to us about how we can learn to do that.
If someone's listening right now, they've started a new business,
maybe they're selling something on Amazon,
maybe they have a new AI business that they're launching.
Ultimately, they have to convince businesses or individuals, consumers,
to say yes to purchasing their product.
Maybe they're a public speaker.
They want people to come to their events.
Maybe they're a musician.
They want people to listen to their songs.
How do we learn to be someone who creates a yes in groups and individuals?
First two things I would say is make sure your business has a margin and a residual that's
going to work for your life, right?
A margin or residual.
I'll leave that there.
Study what that means.
Do that.
Second, to make sure you believe in what you're selling.
I can't sell anything I don't believe in.
and it crushes my heart and my soul
to see people running around the world
selling things they don't believe in
just to make money
and that destroys human beings.
So make sure you truly believe
in what you're selling, right?
The first two things.
Once that's true,
you have the margin and residual
and you believe in what your offer is
into the world,
where you're sharing with the world,
the value you're creating and giving, right?
Then from that place,
there's only four steps,
12 indispensable elements
and four energies of influence.
I certainly will deep dive into them all
but the first is you have to build emotional rapport with people.
You have to open the listening
because if you don't, then you're Charlie Brown's teacher saying
wah, want, wah, wah, wah.
And the most powerful disruptive way to do that
is to lean into truth with people.
So for example, right?
So let's say, Jay, you said,
hey, do that right now with the folks that are here.
I would say every single person listening,
and this is called Level 5 listening,
we spoke about it earlier, right?
This is the discernment of patterns of humans.
you're all listening to this because you want more.
Maybe you want more money, maybe you want more time freedom.
Maybe you want to be happier today, more hopeful, more proud, more confident, more worthy.
But you desire, feel pull inside you for something more,
and you believe Jay Shetty can provide that for you.
And you're right, by the way.
So congratulations.
And what I'm here now to offer you is that solution.
That would be called a disruptive opening in truth,
where you're acknowledging the audience wants more,
and you're speaking,
I always say into three different things, Jay,
the most at least,
maybe you want money,
maybe you just want more joy and happiness,
maybe you want both or something in between.
That would be called speaking into all listening, right?
Some people it's money, some people it's happiness,
or something in between.
Now you've spoken into all listening
from a frame of truth,
they all want more,
and I said it with a great degree of congruence and certainty.
What that causes is the building of report
with the audience. I call it the opening of listening. It's only for a very short period of time,
listening can close very quickly, but now you've opened the listening of the people in the audience.
And that would be your beginning.
Hey, I'm Nora Jones, and I love playing music with people so much that my podcast called Playing Along is back.
I sit down with musicians from all musical styles to play songs together in an intimate setting.
Every episode's a little different, but it all involves music and conversation with some of my
favorite musicians. Over the past two seasons, I've had special
guests like Dave Grohl, Leveh, Mavis Staples, Remy Wolf, Jeff Tweedy, really too many to name.
And this season, I've sat down with Alessia Cara, Sarah McLaughlin, John Legend, and more.
Check out my new episode with Josh Grobin.
You related to the Phantom at that point.
Yeah, I was definitely the Phantom in that.
That's so funny.
Share each day with me each night, each morning.
Say you love me.
You know I...
So come hang out with us in the studio
and listen to Playing Along
on the IHeart Radio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I'm Bailey Taylor, and this is It Girl.
You may know me from my It Girl series
I've done on the streets of New York over the years.
Well, I've got good news.
I am bringing those interviews and many more to this podcast.
Yes, we will talk about the style and the success,
but we are also talking about the pressure,
the expectations,
work with the women's shaping culture right now.
As a woman in the industry, you're always underestimated.
So you have to work extra hard and you have to push the narrative in a way that doesn't
compromise who you are in your integrity.
You know, I like to say I was kind of like a silent ninja.
Each week, I have unfiltered conversations with female founders, creatives, and leaders to talk about
ambition, visibility, and what it really takes to build something meaningful in the public
eye.
Because being a it girl isn't about the spotlight, it's about owning it.
I think the negatives need to be discussed and they need to be told to people who maybe don't do this every day just so they know what's really going on.
I feel like pulling the curtain back is important.
Listen to It Girl with Bailey Taylor on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
I'm Iris Palmer and my new podcast is called Against All Od, and that's exactly what the show is about doing whatever it takes to be thoughts.
Get ready to hear from some of your favorite entrepreneurs and entertainers as they share stories about defying expectations, overcoming,
barriers and breaking generational patterns.
I'm talking to people like award-winning actress, producer, and director, Eva Langoria.
I think I had like $200 in my savings account and my mom goes, what are you going to do?
And I was like, I'll figure it out.
We got a one-bedroom apartment for like $400 a month and we all could not afford.
Like, I was like, how am I going to make $100 a month?
I'm opening up like I've never before.
For those of you who think you know me from what you've seen on social media, get ready to see a whole new side of me.
Listen to Against All Odds with Iris Palmer as part of the My Cultura podcast network,
available on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.
Sean, what you're talking to me about is integrity-based human influence, right?
It's this idea that we can do things with integrity, ethically, appropriately,
and still make an impact and influence on people.
And I think that's what most of us want to do in life.
If we want to create value for people and we want to create value for ourselves, talk to me about how people can be better at selling and marketing by having this value proposition.
We have specific definitions of integrity, like to start. Really simple, three parts. First, it's being transparent to the relevant truth. So if, for example, I was here and I had not created unique financial success and I've been.
I'm saying all these things, right?
So that would be a relevant truth that I am,
or if I lost all my money yesterday, right?
That would be relevant truth to be sharing with you here today.
So be transparent to the relevant truth.
What color my underwear is is not particularly relevant unless I was an underwear salesperson,
right?
So transparent to the relevant truth.
Second, that our desire is to add more value than we're going to receive.
My desire is to add more value for your listeners for you than anything I'm going to receive
that is always my absolute express intention.
It is not just expressed, it's implicit,
it's conditioned inside of me,
that I want to create more value
for everything I do for others
than I'm going to receive myself.
Second, third, that the thing that we say does something,
does the thing we say it does.
So if we say, hey, this pen writes well,
and it will last one year.
If the pen writes well lasts a year,
then you and the pen are in integrity, right?
Three parts.
Relevant truth, more value.
you, it does what we say. So from that place, I think we begin this journey into integrity-based
human influence and this concept I was mentioning a moment ago about rapport and leaning into truth.
And where this goes haywire is when people realize, Jay, that they can make a lot of money
doing something. So for example, right, I have lots of colleagues that are in the space and it's a
wonderful industry and it's also like every industry. It's full of all kinds of problems for people
that are heavily in real estate investing, right?
And people tell people to start flipping houses
and they sell programs online about this.
And this is a really wonderful potential way to make a living.
And it's also a very long, arduous, complex journey
that takes an incredible amount of time
and is more about longer-term financial stability
than it would be in a shorter run of financial abundance.
If people are selling that and they're not disclosing it,
then they're really harming people, right?
So what I would share with people is think about what you're sharing, what's relevant,
how do you create more value, and if it does what we say, if for a lot of those people selling
those programs, they should be selling them to people who are not 25 years old and looking
by the time of 27 to be having financial abundance.
Instead, they should be selling those programs to people who are 40, have some money,
and want to build a diversified portfolio, right?
So my point is with anything we're sharing, if it's integris, make sure you're selling it to the right audience for those people before you even decide how to begin to set these offers and constructs, right?
So the next thing I would share for those that are out there is to make sure you're creating structures in integrity that are going to create an exponential increase in the amount of potential sales meetings.
going to have in a sales meeting is where somebody can purchase your services. So if you're selling
solar, if you're selling real estate, if you're selling accounting, if you're selling pens,
if you're selling whatever you're selling, then I talk about this concept of ecosystem merging
where you're speaking to audiences of your potential ideal grouping of people and then you're
creating value for those audiences. What did I do? I went out and started speaking to chiroprackers in
1997 late about being underpaid by insurance companies. I wasn't going one at a time. I wasn't
randomly networking and I do J-teach against random networking. I teach about intentionality and transparency.
So I went to this incredible group of people and what was the value I was going to create for
the Northern New Jersey Chiropractic Society almost 30 years ago. It was to inspire them.
They felt defeated by the insurance companies. So I wasn't there to do information on my services.
I was there to tell them you're at war
and you don't even know it.
I blew the roof off the building with these people
about taking back their power
and how understandable it was
if they had given up,
if they were letting the insurance companies steal their money,
but it was a mindset shift.
And the footnote wasn't,
hey, by the way,
I might be able to help you with this
if you want to talk to me more.
But the value I gave them was inspiration.
The value I gave them
was if they work with me or not,
they were able to take away massive value going forward in their practice.
That's what I believe in group influence and individual influence is Integris.
How can you make an offering of your services when you're complete with an individual or
a grouping of people and whether or not they use your services, they have left with value?
And I'll pause there.
So I said, and I feel like it's such a great reminder because it really makes, I think sometimes
you can even build a product with the best of intentions.
But if you took it through your filtering system,
you'd be much clearer about what the offering is and who it serves,
even if it was already built as something to help other people.
And the intention that drives, I mean, I think about this all the time.
Whenever we're talking about a partnership or working with someone else,
it's like, I always ask my team, I'm like,
how does this become a win-win?
Like, how does this truly serve the other person?
And I loved what you said about, you know,
wanting to over deliver almost so that you're giving more than you could ever possibly receive.
And it's like it's such an important part. My whole team knows that we're always functioning from
that place. We're never trying to take advantage of anyone. And at the same time, we never want to be
taken advantage of either. Right. It's important to have self-respect as much as it is to have respect for
everyone else that we're working for. When you do this, and I think there'll be a lot of people listening
saying, I'm a good person, I'm doing good work, I'm creating good work. I just don't know how to scale a
business. What's the difference between someone who creates something that solves a problem for a
couple of people, but then can solve a problem for a lot of people? So first, my grandfather was a
wonderful person and never made any money. My grandma rose, I would never be here without her.
This is my father's mother. And she gave me so much presence and so much love as a child in her
railroad apartment where you walked into the bedroom when you walked into the apartment. When you walked into
the apartment. A bullet hole was there one morning when I went there dropped off by my mom
as she was going off to work and my grandma rose never made any money in her life. So being nice
and making money have nothing to do with each other. I wish the world was different. I wish the
world was different in a million different ways. But I relate to the world as it is as I look to
help shape the world into what I hope it will become. So that's like part of my thing, right?
So from that said, when people think, hey, I work really hard, I do a great job.
I go, oh, so you're a terrible marketer.
And I'll laugh and I'll smile and I'll break their pattern.
I'll go, well, I go, okay, how many salesmenage you have a lot?
Well, a lot.
How many?
Well, uh, right?
And you'll find, like, they have virtually no sales meetings.
I go, listen, this is okay.
You do an incredible job.
People need your accounting services.
They need your real estate services.
You seem like a wonderful, wonderful, masterful person at delivering these
services, you just don't realize that marketing is foundational. So to build a scale business,
it's one sentence, exponentially grow the quantity and quality of your sales meetings, period.
There's no comma. Because once you do that, then you can easily duplicate yourself with other
service providers. It is very easy to find people to do the service of what you do, lawyer, accountant,
financial service provider, chiropractor, medical doctor. It is easy.
easy to find people, much easier to find people masterful at service delivery than it is in
marketing mastery, marketing and sales mastery. So to be the scaled business owner, you must become,
and this is what I wanted to resist like crazy. Why I almost quit the law and became a person who
was not in financial abundance at all and went into high school athletic coaching 30 years ago.
What I had to reframe was my reality that I'm going to become not only in,
masterful attorney, which I was, but I'm going to become the most masterful marketer the world
has ever seen. And that decision is what permitted me to go from having no employees to 40 employees
in two years. And I've never heard a person, Jay, to this day, you know, I didn't build Google,
I didn't build Facebook. I don't have, you know, the size of following you do, congratulations,
amazing, right? But I did something I've never heard of anybody else doing. Well, first, I'm on the
verge of becoming the first blind, self-funded unicorn.
billion-dollar corporate value founder in the history of planet Earth,
never a blind self-funded unicorn creator ever before.
But one before I was that, 30 years ago, I did something to this day.
I've never heard of anybody doing.
Two years out of law school, it built a 40-person law firm.
I had 40 employees, onshore, employed, not contractors.
I've never heard of anybody doing that.
People, how'd you do that?
I just told you.
I became a marketer that created enough quantity of quality sales meetings
through mastering influence going in front of people like the chiropractors in Northern New Jersey
than the entire state chiropractic society that allowed me to have 40 employees working for me.
And if I wanted, I would have been able to do it with 100 people,
which I soon did in the second building my law firm,
because I created the highest quantity of quality sales meetings
through the superpower of integrous group influence
with messaging that resonated in value with the audience
that made everybody want to have a conversation,
not everybody, but made lots of people
want to have conversations for us to provide services,
integrative services to them.
What's the hardest thing about building a company
with multiple people, multiple leaders, leading teams?
Talk to me about the leadership aspect
of someone who's scaling from a company of two
to a company of 10 to a company of 20.
Yeah.
The most challenging thing for people to realize
is the triangle that I say is essential for that.
Three things.
One, we need people who are loyal
to the stated mission.
I mentioned that before.
Second, we need people who are masterfully competent
at whatever job function it is.
The hardest masterful competence to find
is marketers and salespeople,
by far not close.
Third, we need to be an aligned in aligned empowerment,
which means we're going to run the play.
We say that we're going to run.
So if the idea is we're going to book X number of speaking engagements
in front of Y number of organizations
with Z value to be created, that's what we're going to do.
And if I go out and do that and you're aligned empowerment
is you're going to be a service provider,
then you're going to make sure that you call clients back
within six hours, if that's a standard.
we set, like you're going to do the things we say we're going to do. And the hardest thing to do
with people, Jay, is to not permit them to recreate their job. And if you permit people to recreate
their job because you like them, you think you're being nice, then you will destroy your
company. You will cause those people to eventually resent you, dislike you. And if you ever
think you could take them back to the original job that you both agree to and this concept of
loyalty to state admission. As soon as you let them change their job, you've had them become
disloyal, you've endorsed it, you've permitted everybody else in your organization to do the same,
and you've permitted them to destroy aligned the empowerment. So do not let any human being
recreate their job in the three things, loyalty to state admission, set it, create it, and live it.
Second, massively competent, third, align the empowerment. Do not let anybody recreate their job.
Sean, we had some of our audience write in some of their scenarios for this that I want to read out to you.
Oh, wow.
So you can tell them what would be a good thing to think about.
It could be mindset advice, practical tips, things to reflect on.
I want you to feel as open as you can.
This is fun.
And so I'm reading our scenarios of where they are.
Sound good?
I love it.
Awesome.
Okay.
So our first person is a 24-year-old recent grad working her first corporate job.
She feels underpaid, overwhelmed, and already questioning if she chose the wrong path.
Where should she start?
Start by doing what we spoke about earlier is beginning to master influence because you may be
underpaid, but you may be overpaid.
I wouldn't think of how many hours you're working in this beginning of your journey.
I begin to think about how much value you can create for this organization and whether or not
they will appropriately recognize it.
and I would say to this kind and wonderful soul,
it's a critically important that you don't decide what value is,
that in being a loyal to a state admission with this organization,
you come into an integrous agreement about what that is and looks like, right?
Number one, number two, I would begin to master influence.
I'd be on the side doing what we said over the next 30 days,
first week, top 10% of the time, then, you know, one-third of the time,
and be creating value with people because the most valuable thing you could do
is to master this ability to become magnetic with humans
and you become magnetic with humans
when they believe you see them, hear them,
and authentically care about them,
and you know how to help them grow,
one personally, two professionally, three financially.
If you want to have people glued to you forever,
then authentically become that.
The second one is a 40-year-old woman
who has worked in marketing for 15 years
and has done very well for herself.
She wants to branch off and start her own marketing firm, but feels too late and is afraid of starting over.
Yeah, definitely not too late. I don't know your personal circumstances. So make sure you've anchored and taken care of your responsibilities financially, you know, to whomever you love and care about.
And if there's nobody that close to your response for taking care of financially, then quit and start today.
Quit and start today. Because if it's only you, then you could deal with it all. It's not too late and to realize this.
if you're in marketing, master AI and become the greatest master possible because that is about to
eviscerate the entire world of marketing at an extinction level event that as a marketer,
if you could master the leverage of AI and the duplication and scaling of it, you will be
riding that tsunami wave that's about to create extinction from many who are not.
Let's talk about marketing and eye for a moment.
what are you seeing that we might not even have comprehended yet?
Like who's doing it well?
What are the tools that are being used?
What's been created already that you're fascinated by?
Yes.
So again, not to be self-serving.
I believe we were sitting in my company Acti
at the literal cutting edge of everything
in the space of marketing acceleration, right?
And so what have I seen that isn't happening
that I stepped into the void?
It's to realize that when we're,
when people say,
oh,
AI is not here to replace humans,
like that just isn't true.
And it isn't that I,
again,
I didn't do this.
I didn't create AI.
I didn't build this.
But I don't think
that my grandmother
who worked at the American can factory
in Jersey City,
those jobs went away too.
I love Bruce Springsteen.
I am nostalgic.
I am loving.
I miss the way things were
and I embrace the way things are
and I even look more forward
to the things,
way things will be.
AI is going to eliminate massive amounts of jobs at everything in white collar, and that includes
marketing. And to think differently is absolutely fundamentally incorrect. We've created agents and
beings that can cause yes with human beings better than 99.9% of salespeople right now.
Shocking, mind-blowing, disruptive for what we build. And it's the same thing in marketing.
and think about this for second jay and everybody the human constraint factor we've all heard the term in marketing
split testing so you hire a digital marketing firm and i've hired many in my life i've spent
j i can't even imagine what you've spent right um i'm sure we've all spent millions and millions of dollars
in marketing in our lives and we hire a marketing agency and what they're there to do is quote split test
okay how many split tests how often how many humans that's constrained by human beings
split testing costs money.
It requires human beings to make decisions,
and what you typically get
is a very suboptimal work.
It's the same thing in accounting and law,
especially in litigation cases.
There's this fundamental friction point
where we can no longer afford
to create the true value that's possible.
That's the human constraint.
AI completely eviscerates that human constraint,
and to share with you what's possible,
I created it in 48 hours,
27,000 act-eye beings
that are competing within Coliseums
like we would have in the days of gladiators
where they're competing against each other
to become more and more and more masterful.
And in 48 hours,
I would put their work against any digital marketing agency
I've ever hired, and that's in two days.
We're three weeks in at this point.
I'm going to create a million act-eye beings,
a million beings that are doing things
that human beings would normally do,
the causing of yes,
to working with people, the outreach is cold,
the digital marketing split testing,
we have a goal of creating this year
in one day, a thousand webinars running simultaneously,
all created through act-eye beings,
all of which is now fully possible.
So to answer your question like hyper directly, Jay,
is the seismic exponential scale
of what's possible through AI?
And the fact that people often think
that AI can't be as emotionally intelligent as people,
I think AI is now more,
what we've created, what we're dealing with
is more emotionally intelligent
than 99.99% of people I know.
And so for people to realize
that this is here
and that we can masterfully step into it,
powerfully step into it,
but if we think this isn't real,
I mean, that's what the farmer's thought.
That's what the factory workers thought.
It is here,
and it's going to move at an exponentially faster rate
than anything has ever happened.
Lawyers, buckle up.
because 90% of associate legal jobs
will not exist, I believe,
in 36 months to 60 months.
So it's that level of change,
which for somebody who's growth-driven
could be the most exciting time
in human history.
For somebody who wants it to stay the same,
I didn't do it.
Please don't kill the messenger,
but it's not going to stay the same
and it's changing at rates
that are only going to increase
at faster and faster levels.
What should we be focusing on
knowing what we know now from hearing from you and what we're hearing across the world.
Yes.
Scale your marketing.
Leverage it through AI.
Do not take anybody who claims to be an AI expert who is going to train you, look to surpass their mastery as rapidly as humanly possible.
You cannot delegate AI to an outside person or being.
Master for yourself, implement it into your marketing.
into your yes-causing, and remember that integrity, mastery, ethics, emotional intelligence
are fully achievable through AI right now, not tomorrow, and I stake my reputation on it,
and I live it every day, and Jay, I spend six hours preparing with my AI for you.
I asked my AI, where do we conflict, where we're aligned, where the greatest synergies,
what might Jay's audience misunderstand if I say it, not say it.
I role play it, I prepared, I know about your family, I know about your wife, I know about your
parents. All of this, I couldn't have done with a team of 10. And I did it at such an unbelievable
level of preparation. And then we role played it out where my AI was you and I was me. And then I reversed
all of this happening over the course the last couple of days. I love that. I need to take a look at
that interview. Yes. I'd be happy to share it. I'd love to see that. I'd love to see that.
No filter
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Spoken without fear
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Join me
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reach the pinnacle
stung by the sneaker,
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What should someone do if they're the person now afraid of losing their job, whether it's in marketing, whether it's in law, whether it's in accounting, wherever it may be?
What should they be focusing on when that feels uncomfortable when they've been doing this thing?
They've graduated in it.
They've spent years learning it.
Here's what I would propose.
One of the things that I share from my heart is there are seven things that can destroy or liberate our self-mastery.
We talked about how we relate to chemicals in our body and endorph.
offense, certainly purpose and why, you know, foundation of your incredible work in the world,
Jay. The next one, the third one, is our identities. We will live, we will die for our identities.
It's why people run into gunfire as police officers or soldiers or people went into the twin
towers as first responders because their identity was that. They weren't thinking about their
child. They weren't thinking about their way. I mean, they were, I'm sure, at some level.
but not at a level that would stop them
because their identity said,
I will be a coward if I don't run
at this burning building
and try to save these people.
I couldn't look at my daughter, my son,
my wife, my husband, the same
unless I do this, the power of identity.
So what I offer to people
is to become present
to the power of your own choice of identity.
And 30 years ago,
I learned to re-chose my identity.
I thought becoming a marketer or a salesperson
was evil, horrible, and awful.
I realized that wasn't true.
And since then, I've been able to set and reset,
create and recreate my identity very rapidly.
I would develop the skill set.
And the skill set that I would develop for anyone right now
is to lose any sense that you're a lawyer,
you're a doctor, you're a realtor,
you're a coach, a trainer, a speaker.
Now, what you are is whatever you choose to be,
and I would offer you this,
you're a person who adds values other human beings
that loves people unconditionally
and masters what,
every you must master within the balance of love, law, and integrity to deliver the value
you're going to deliver. And right now, there's nothing like AI. So I would commit this very
second to reset your identity to mastering AI in the space of marketing and selling. That will be
your pathway to be the most masterful person anywhere you are. What I'm teaching this to is
everyone in my programs to my children. I am teaching this to every,
single person who works for me. I'm telling them your job is to master replacing yourself with
AI, to trust my integrity that I'll never replace you. And my goal, Jay, for one of my companies right
now that we're saying is valued over a billion dollars is we'll never hire another human.
I'll hire humans do other things. But my goal is to exit this company in the next 36 months for
multiple billions and to never hire another human and have this be the core for exit multiple,
which I'm also going to share with the people
who help to produce it inside of my companies,
including people who worked for me for 25 years
that could not think of themselves
of being less technologically driven
and we're opening this pathway to everyone
because you don't have to be a computer expert,
a data programmer, a computer scientist,
to master AI.
You just have to be a growth-minded person.
I really love the idea of an identity reset,
especially at this time.
I feel like titles have always been so little,
limiting for people. And when we introduce ourselves as our job title, it's nowhere near as abundant
as who we are as individuals. And I always struggle when people are like, what's your title?
I'm like, I don't have one. Like titles feel so, you know, I am an author. I do have a podcast.
I do. But those are things I do. They're all vehicles. And I think helping people recognize that
they have so much more value than their title is an absolutely huge, huge accomplishment.
All right, a few more of these scenarios that we have
because we've got a few more different ones
that were sent through.
Let's do this one.
A 45-year-old newly empty nester
whose kids are older
and who realizes they don't know
who they are outside of being a parent.
My first would be this identity question.
Who do you want to be?
And you could be as small or as impactful
as you desire to be.
And I would really think about
if there was no limits, because we've never lived in a time of less limits in human history,
nothing even close. Three years ago, the freedom we had as people was an aunt to the Godzilla
of the freedom we experienced today to the power of AI, right? So I'd say, who do you want to be
if there were no limits? Do you want to be Wonder Woman? Do you want to be Batman? Do you be Oprah Winfrey?
Do you want to be Tony Robbins? Do you want to be Barack Obama or Donald Trump? Who and what do you
want to be in the world if there were no limits. And I would begin there. I wouldn't think of how to.
I wouldn't think of what would that mean to my children and maybe my grandchildren. I wouldn't
think of any of that yet. I would first think about who do you want to be and why in this world.
And for most people, you're going to come back with is, yeah, I want to be a person like an
Oprah Winfrey or a Tony Robbins or a Jay Shetty. I want to be a person that's creating
massive, valuable, positive impact. I want to end sex trafficking. I want to bring clean water.
you're going to think of very large things you want to do,
because I believe that's the heart and soul of people.
I would start there.
And then I would begin to think about,
well, in the end, would I be far away from my grandkids,
like how much I want to travel or not?
Then I start to create some reasonableness
into what you'd see your future being over the next five years,
10 years, 20 years of your life.
And then finally, I decide how do I want to begin this journey?
And I think, well, do you want to create more financial abundance?
Do you want to create more philanthropic outcome?
and always comes back to mastering influence.
And I would begin to do it just like we said earlier.
But first decide who you will be in the end
if there was no limits, no constraints.
And own the fact that it's entirely possible
because if a blind guy like me who is born defective
and Jay and this person, incredible person with this scenario,
when my children are going to be born,
they asked me if I wanted genetic counseling.
And my son, Tyler, my first child,
I was like, what do you mean,
I can't. What's that? Like, well, I don't see if they had the same eye condition. Well, I'm like, there's no cure. I mean, I don't really care at this point. So, well, but maybe you'd want to make a different decision. Oh, you mean a defective person like me wouldn't want to have a defective child because they might be like me? So if a defective person that doctors were counseling to make an informed decision to terminate my potential child, if I could be living this life blind, what can you do? And the answer is anything you're
to but it begins with that choice of identity and I get to having fun with it be inspired by it
feel the magic of it and don't talk to anybody else about it because they'll bring all their own
stuff to it that's what I would do I love that I was I mean just literally listening to you just
gave me chills there I was like you know it's such a it's so wonderful to see you living such an
abundant I know you went surfing this morning you told me when you went when you got here and I'm thinking
like, wait, you went surfing, your friend just told us, sorry, that you taught his family how to ski.
Yeah.
And I'm like, talk to me about, like, how were you able to, like, talk to me.
Did you learn how to surf before you became blind?
Like, talk to me about how that's even possible?
I can't, I can't do those things properly even when I can see fully.
Like, how does that work?
I learned to surf after I became blind, you know.
Wow.
And to put it in appropriate context, I was always a water person.
You know, I want to, I'm always very transatlantic.
parent. I am very athletic. I have great body spatial awareness and I've trained as an athlete. I was a great
body surfer before I went blind. So I understood the water. I understood waves. I understood the feel of the
ocean at an incredibly high level. But I had never surfed on a surfboard. And so I began that journey
after I became blind. And skiing, I skied before I was losing my vision. I was not an effective
with mogul skier. I'm now a really masterful mogul skier. So you answer your question,
yes, I develop double black diamond skiing mastery and surfing in really extreme conditions
in big waves after going blind. And what I would offer to people is you wouldn't believe
what's possible what you're truly capable of because I'm not that special. I'm just not,
but what I learned to do in how specifically is by feel. So I ski double black diamonds,
100% by feel.
I'm 56 years old.
I'm able to relax my body, relax my core,
and I'm able to go over the mountains,
feeling, just literally feeling the mountain
and having enough flex in my knees, my hips,
my core, which I hope to maintain,
Jay, for a long time.
We'll see what genetics tells me, you know, in aging.
But that's how I'm able to do it.
And I am a much better skier than when I had sight.
I tried to see the moguls
and think through the mobiles.
And I've done a lot of repetition.
And the same thing with surfing.
I could feel the pull of the wave.
And in full disclosure,
I have a teeny bit of peripheral vision, right?
And so, like, I'm able to use this,
you know, I probably have 10% of what people
have in peripheral vision.
I have no central vision whatsoever.
Zero.
I can't see anything whatsoever in front of me at all.
I could see a number one right here,
you know, next to my eye right now.
So if the lighting's right,
I could see a little bit of contrast
in the wave of the background,
coming and I'll start paddling and then I'll feel the wave taking off right and I'll know when
it pop it's all by feel but I think the point of the story is we can do so much more than we ever
believe we're capable of and part of my personal development journey you know I learned long ago
about being an example of possibility like I heard that term I'm like I want to be that I want to be
that for my kids first and it keeps expanding like I just want to be an example of possibility
Thank you, Jay.
And it's so fun.
I just love life.
I love teaching.
And listen, I'm intense, right?
And I love people and I'm intense, you know.
And I definitely am disruptive and the lightning bolt of unblinded is there for a reason.
I believe in lightning bolt and creating disruption for sure.
But it comes from this beautiful place of love.
And when I went skiing with Mike, you know, my friend's children was talking about it,
I've taught more than 100 people to surf on 100 people to ski that couldn't before.
I love it.
I love freeing people.
And I'd encourage people to decide to be that.
Like, Jay, you are that.
And so many people who are listening
are that in certain ways
and to realize you could be it in so many more ways
and how fun it is to live that way.
I just got over being sick.
I don't feel 100%.
It's like, there's no way I'm coming at L.A.
and not going surfing this morning.
We were like super late we got in
and I'm like, maybe I should sleep more.
I'm like, no, I'm going to show up better for Jay
in this audience.
If I go surfing this morning, I'll feel more like myself, I'll feel more in my body, asleep four hours, there's no way I'm not doing this.
And so what if we just chose to love people enough, love ourselves enough, to do these things to be an example of possibility?
Sean, it has been such a joy talking to you today.
And I feel like I've been personally getting a motivational session from you, which I feel so lucky to have.
and my audience has questions
and you've been incredible for the community.
Here are the final five.
These questions have to be answered
in one sentence maximum.
I will probably break my own rule
because you're fascinating,
but we'll try and stick to the rules.
So Sean Callagher, these are your final five.
Question number one,
what is the best advice you've ever heard or received?
That influences the only human attainable superpower.
Question number two,
what is the worst advice you've ever heard or received?
You should listen to anyone who,
hasn't produced the results you want.
Question number three, what is the hardest thing
you believe you've accomplished?
To build a scaled business
that permitted me to only miss nine
of the 1,000 plus sporting events
that my children played in.
That made you emotional.
It is the thing I'm most proud of
that I've ever accomplished in my life.
Because people say, Jay,
that you have to trade money for time
and I believe that lie.
And it almost caused me to not pursue building and scaling business and creating financial freedom.
And I lived with nobody knowing I had money.
I had no social media.
And I would take my son to go ice climbing in Switzerland for the weekend.
And, you know, my daughters do whatever they wanted to do.
And we lived in a middle class environment where nobody knew the secret life we had.
And I was there present for all their games and all their sporting events and all their things.
And it is something that I'm much more proud of that
than anything I've ever done in my life, by far not close.
Talk to me about how you managed to do that.
Because I think people talk a lot about work-life balance.
I'm not sure that's the direction you're going to go in.
So how did you manage to shop for your kids, be so present?
Sounds like you have a great relationship with them.
Yes.
How was that possible while also building this incredible empire that you've built?
No, thank you.
Well, my son just finished law school.
He works with us.
Congratulations.
Yeah, my daughter's boyfriend, who's amazing, works for my AI company.
And my other daughter is pursuing her acting career and do incredibly.
And yes, thank you.
We have incredible relationships.
And I have a four and a half-year-old daughter that was the hardest thing in coming out here,
was just not being with her for a single day.
And my theme song of leaving it coming out here, Jay, was listening to Let It Go from Frozen,
which is her favorite song.
So that's what I left to.
But the how to do that is to make a decision to become a business owner.
not a business operator.
And again, it comes back to what we shared
by creating enough of a quantity of quality sales meetings
and having people who don't want to do that,
but do want to service those clients masterfully.
And once we realize that's possible
and we set on in a course to re-identify
or create a new identity for ourselves
and deal with our fears,
we can become a business owner, not operator,
and we can be completely time-free.
I built a business that permitted me to my company that is a billion dollar company.
I could work at that company for two hours a month right now.
Me being here is not working for that company.
Me being here is to expand this mission to the world.
But you can build a scaled business and be an owner and not an operator.
It's entirely possible.
And then do all the things you want to do in the world.
I mean, yeah, it's so interesting, isn't it?
Because it's like you're thinking like, oh, there's a client in the early days who's calling
you and saying, I need you there on a Saturday, I need you there on a Sunday, or I need you to fix this.
And you're like, no, I'm at the game.
You know, and at that time, now I understand it because you've achieved something.
But it's like you've did it in those days where it would have been easier to be like,
all right, kids, I'm not going to come to this game.
How did you decide the nine that you missed?
Incredible question.
Five of them were late in the game.
Five of them were my son's sophomore year in high school when he achieved something that was
far outside his genetic capability
and became a start-arm varsity.
It was so hard. But I made a commitment
five years before that to save somebody's life
in a legal case that it did not take for money.
I took for justice.
And my children were very enrolled in that case
and they were old enough to understand it
and it was the trial.
And it became Arizona's top jury verdict
for about an eight-year period.
It was this unwinnable case
that we had in a business context
for somebody whose business was stolen from them.
And my children were very much involved
That was five of them.
The others were, you know, sort of random events where they were okay.
It was a regular game.
It was a big speaking engagement.
You know, a couple of my daughters, and that's what it was.
But I trained and developed leaders in my businesses that could provide services that I believed were at an higher level of mastery than any competitive mind could provide.
It would be non-integrous to say that these people had my skill set, you know,
I'm at some things I do.
I believe I'm one of one in the world.
A couple things I do.
But I was very much in integrity because I had people hire our firm and said,
you're not going to get me.
You're going to get the systems and processes and things I've created, right?
And that's what I would tell people when I was at doing speak engagements and like.
So I was fully in integrity with my life and my children.
And when I built what I built, my desire was to show up as that type of father.
And in certain ways, Jay, it was selfish because I think my kids didn't even need me there that much.
But it was my favorite job in the entire world to do, the greatest thing I ever did.
And tomorrow, my daughter, Selena, as I'm rushing back and there's a lot of beautiful people to see out here in California that I know,
but I'll be with her with Coach Roberto and her private soccer training that she loves at 4.30 p.m. tomorrow because these are choices that I've made in my life.
I love that. I'm so glad you told me about the nine, and I'm glad to ask that question.
I love also the meaning made for the trial that you had to attend and your kids being a part of that journey.
I think that's such a beautiful thing that we miss out on is that they actually get to be a part of that story.
I told them that I'm going to prove to our legal system works in this case.
I was already, I'll go with post-economic.
I didn't practice law anymore in 2011 when I took on this case.
I didn't want to.
It was in Arizona.
I knew he was going to create a ton.
But this person was suicidal.
His entire business stolen from him.
And I wanted to be a savior.
and I wanted to prove to him
the world looked different than he thought it did.
He's a very lost person
and I wanted to prove to my kids that are just the system worked
and I told them that from the start.
So thank you.
So powerful.
Question number four.
What's something that you used to value
that you don't value anymore?
I overvalued the approval of people
and the greatest pains of my life, Jay,
have been from making really horrible choices.
This is my second marriage, and this is a wonderful person.
I got married for the second time because I wanted to prove that when I said, yeah, I get married again.
And I was being questioned, well, you told me you get married again.
And well, I'm like, I don't know this is working.
I made a pleasing decision and my children were opposed to it.
Again, I honor my second wife.
She's a wonderful human being.
She got an incredible story of her own.
But it just didn't make sense.
And that decision, many others, I made to please people.
So if you say, hey, Sean, what's the worst things you've ever done in your life?
It will be to make decisions to please people.
So what I don't value any more in the same way is the opinions and judgments of others,
which I often know are very self-serving and contrived.
So I really look for, I receive feedback, but I don't value the opinions and judgment of others,
particularly when it's not masterful and misinformed.
And fifth and final question we ask this to every guest who's ever been on the show.
if you could create one law that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be?
To never claim to be a realist when you're actually a cynic.
I would make that illegal.
Why is that so important to you?
Because it destroys the hearts and souls of humans.
And I believe that so many people who believe they're doing right are actually cynical people
who have been hurt and traumatized and have such empathy for them.
but they're giving horrific life and business advice to people
that are destroying those people.
And we punish people, as we should,
for committing crimes of physical violence against people,
but people are free to destroy hearts and souls generationally,
and we have no laws to protect that.
Sean Gallagher, thank you so much for your time, your energy, your presence.
Everyone who's been listening or watching,
I hope that you will go and subscribe to Sean's Instagram, YouTube,
across all of his social media,
so you can really connect more deeply with his thoughts, his ideas,
his principles, and his work and events.
I highly recommend you go and do that right now.
And Sean, I hope you'll be back very soon with more insight for all of us.
Thank you so much for showing up today.
Thank you for sharing your story so vulnerably and so truthfully.
And I am deeply, deeply grateful that our paths crossed
and I'm very thankful that I got to spend this time with you.
So thank you, thank you so much.
My honor, my gratitude.
I hope this is the beginning, Jay.
Thank you.
And to everybody out there, God bless.
Thank you.
Thank you.
If you love this episode, you love my conversation with Simon Sinek,
where we dive into the real key to create meaningful connection
and influence beyond numbers or followers.
Disney, all of the characters are trained that when a little kid hugs you,
you may not let go until the kid lets go first.
You hug the kid as long as long as.
long as the kid wants to hug you.
I'm Lori Siegel, a long-time tech
journalist, and consider my new podcast
mostly human, your bridge
to the future. Anyone can now be an entrepreneur,
anyone can build an app, and it's
very empowering. Each week, I'll
speak to the people building that future,
and we're going to break down what all of this
innovation actually means for you.
What I come to realize
is that when people think that they're dating these
AI companion, they're actually dating
the companies that create this.
We're experiencing one of the great
Greatest tech accelerations in human history.
And let's be honest, that can be messy.
There's no playbook for what to do when an AI model hallucinates a story about you.
But it's my belief that we should all benefit from this moment.
Mostly human will show you how.
My goal is to give you the playbook, so you can benefit.
The reason I say agency is because if we can give power back to people,
then I think that's probably the best thing we can do for your mental health.
Listen to mostly human on the IHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
No gloss, no filter.
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Spoken without fear.
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The world will be at peace only when it is ruled by poets and philosophers.
Listen to my weekly podcast, the Pooja Abhawad show, on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Come for the honesty. Stay for the fire.
Hi, it's Joe Winterstein, host of the Spirit Daughter podcast, where we talk about astrology,
natal charts, and how to step into your most vibrant life. And today I'm talking with my dear friend,
Krista Williams. It can change you in the best way possible. Dance with the change. Dance with the
breakdowns. The embodiment of Pisces intuition with Capricorn power moves. So I'm like,
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Listen to the Spirit Daughter podcast starting on February 24th on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
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