Oversharing - Can I Demand Family Members Not Post My Kids Online?

Episode Date: May 13, 2025

The ups and downs of puppy ownership continue for Jordana while Dr. Naomi is working to embrace that which she can not control when it comes to gardening. The Overshare of the week dives into the often divisive issue of whether or not to post images of children on social media when one Betch expresses her concerns with AI porn and online imagery. Continuing down the lines of “immoral acts,” a listener asks about the ethics of one couple’s choice to crowdfund a house downpayment in exchange for a wedding invitation and Dr. Naomi and Jordana have thoughts... Later, both hosts offer up some salient advice after a write-in asks for ways to get around a lack of self confidence when it comes to creative pursuits. The Triggered of the episode comes from a childless listener who was told she and her hubby are “not a family” and a new segment sponsored by American Home Shield, “Planting Roots,” discusses all the reasons house hunting alone is hard but a commendable achievement. Subscribe to Oversharing on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@EverythingsFineBetches  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A quick note before we get into the episode, Oversharing is a podcast for entertainment purposes only. It is not a medical podcast and does not constitute medical or psychological advice. Always seek the advice of your physician or a mental health professional. Hello and welcome back to Oversharing. I'm Jordana Abraham. And I am Dr. Naomi Bernstein. So good to be back with you.

I'm recording from New York where it's going to be raining for quite a few days, embracing myself for that. How are you? Pretty good. Yeah, definitely different vibes over here. We did some planting over the weekend. Oh, that's fun. I like the idea of planting and gardening. But everything dies that I, because I don't, I don't have time to water it. So I'm like, okay, I have these in-ground sprinklers. I'll let them do their thing. But no, you have to like tenderly care for these pretty little plants. And I don't really have it in me. I mean, I agree. Like most things, I think it's more fun when you're good at it. It's hard to find something really fun that you're, that you don't, doesn't like come super

naturally, I think. Totally. Yes. It is true. I think I envision in my older age when I have not much else. Yeah. To do. I'll be like, I'm just going to wake up and water my plants.

Right. But yeah. So they're in the ground. I'll let you know what's going on once it starts to. turn 102 and everything withers up and dies. But right now it looks pretty. I love it. We had our first training session with Ronnie. The trainer came. Oh, okay. How'd that go? It was good. They're training you. Yeah. They're not training him. I get that. And yeah, I guess, no, I mean, I guess they're training us to train him. And it seemed like the theme of my week was like,

and I think we kind of discussed this before. It's like, and I think it relates to a lot of the emails that we get in, especially from people who are like people pleasers. And I don't necessarily think of myself as a people pleaser. But I think that that feeling comes from the same area as like the issues that I'm having with the dog, which is basically like, and again, I think they just maybe they call that type B parenting or whatever, but it's kind of like the urge to just give them whatever they want, you know, and how that's kind of like antithetical to doing what's best for them. you know what I mean? Right.

Like I was watching, I happened to be watching Big Daddy. Remember that movie with Adam Sandler? Yes. Okay. Where he gets the kid, he's like kind of like a fuck up. And then he gets the kid. And then he's like, I'm not going to be like my dad. I'm going to like parent a different way.

Let you do whatever you want. And so he's like do whatever you want. Like wear whatever you want. Eat whatever you want. And just like all the ways that that doesn't work out. But it is, it's funny like doing that just like people pleasing is almost more of a way. It's almost like a. selfish thing because you're just trying to not have to deal with someone else's feelings of

like being unhappy with you. Yes. And expressing it like loudly and often and yes. Right. And feeling like they're in in distress because of you does feel. I mean, I don't know. Some people I guess are better at being, I don't know, is it like conf, is it like if you're not a people, it's almost like if you're not a people pleaser or if you're not, don't have that urge. Are you just, you just don't care what other people think or you just know that you're more confident that what you're doing is correct for the person or for yourself? I think it's probably a combination. I think you really believe in it, you know, that it's going to work. And then I think the other part is that some people are like, I've been uncomfortable and I'm okay.

Like I've, I've been where you are. Right. I didn't like it. Like I think a lot of times if your parents raised you that way, you were kind of like, I've been on the other side of this. And like, one, I see that it works. And two, I see that it's not really as bad as you're making it seem because I've lived it almost. Like if you had parents that were more. Yes. Boundary and rule setting, you'd be like, okay. Like, I was told no and I was okay. Yeah. I didn't die from that. And maybe that's why Mike's better at it because that's what he's kind of used to. Like, just not being given. And I think for me, I was a pretty like self-sufficient kid, I think.

And so I didn't have any rules, but I still like really wanted to do whatever like the proper thing was. Yes. I think you're perfect. It makes sense why it's not working for you because you're kind of like I didn't have rules and I figured it out. And I like, you know, made friends. Yeah, that worked out. Okay. didn't become a drug addict and got into college and it worked out.

Right. Yeah. And you don't, you have experience in the other side of it, which is like, I had rules. I had boundaries and that also worked out. Right. And probably more likely to work out with the rules and boundaries. Totally. I could see why it's hard.

I'm similar in my parenting style. So, but yeah, I think you just have to. But you're also blessed also with like kids who, I guess it's kind of like with, I mean, with your kids, I feel like they're. I don't know if it's an inherent thing. Is that weird to say? It feels like they're like they have their own sense. Not pushing the boundaries too much.

They're not like risk taking. Like I do think there's certain kids probably and animals that like need more disciplining than others. Like could have used more. And that's true of our siblings too. Like some of our siblings could have used more boundaries and rules than others. Maybe. Yes.

And I have two dogs and they're the example of that. Like Penny, I don't know if you could see them for those listening on YouTube. I can't see them. They're back there. So we're both on the couch. I wish I could show you guys. But Penny is, she was our first one and she's just like, if you give her the slightest

correction, she's like, I got it, won't do it again. Like I'm. And lucky you have to like, you could like take her whole body and drag her to the place where you want her to go. And she just runs right back. Right. To where she started. So it is.

She has more rules, right? I guess. Yes. Yes. Well, she's the one that's the one that's. is created when we leave the house. Right. Because she's just not trustworthy.

And Penny gets to like roam around and do whatever she wants. So yeah, different rules for different dogs. So I guess you'll have to figure out what Ronnie needs. But I do think for you, there will be a moment. And I remember having this moment with Brooks where it was like he was screaming and he wanted whatever he wanted. He wanted the chicken nugget that didn't have a crack in it or whatever the thing was that he wanted. And I was just like, I'm creating a monster. I'm not giving him a different chicken

nugget. He's going to have this one. And I'm, and he was screaming and throwing everything off of his high chair and like going bananas. And I was just breathing. And like I knew if I gave him the other nugget, I was going to be creating a monster. And then finally he stopped. And he was like, okay, I'll eat it. And the feeling of that was like, joyous. beyond belief. I was like, I broke the wild horse. Right. You had to work for it. And he ate the chicken nugget with the crack in it. And it was over. Yeah. And it felt like a million bucks. Because you like, I joke with Jeff. I'm like, I broke him. Like it's such a good. It's like, it's sad to say, but it's like a good feeling. Yeah. You can like break their spirit a little.

Yeah, they get them to do the thing, you know? Yeah. No, that sounds. Awesome. I'm going to try that with creating the dog when he doesn't want to be, which is like, yeah. The trainer is basically like if your kid was in a car and they didn't want to wear their seatbelt, and they were like crying, you would like deal with the, it's better for it. It's like you're doing something that's good for them at their own expense, but it's not really at their own expense. But yeah, yeah, it's definitely.

The other side of it, I will just say is I get things from like, I think it's the ASPCA, like the animal protection thing. and they're like, when you're walking your dog, you should just let them go wherever they want and sniff all the flowers. Like the animal protection people are kind of like, don't break their spirit. Like they should be free to roam and sniff. And if they want to smell, I mean, I'm not saying they're not advocating. You should let them like crap on people's lawns.

But I think people are like, nope, we're walking in a straight line. We're not going to deter. We're determined. We're walking. And they're like, well, if they want to sniff, let them sniff if they want to. that's a good, that's a good point that you're making also just about like the thing in question, right? Because it's not like a child is like has, is like a human baby. Like it's like a societal thing. But then I do think sometimes I'm like he is an animal. Like, is it our collective societal fault that we're causing like kind of trying to make, right, make these animals.

That's not in his nature. Like when he brought, when he was playing with the dead bird, I was. like, this is actually like what you're kind of supposed to be doing. Like, yes. Kind of anti, like everything your genes are telling you to do would be to let go of this bird. Like you shouldn't really let go of it. Yeah, that was like the win of his life, you know, in a time. Right.

That was like the best day of the week. Totally. Best day of his whole four month life. Yeah. Yeah. But it is interesting. the middle probably, but keep us posted because I think just breathing through it, it's going to be good for you in general, just breathing through that discomfort of like someone else's, you know,

this, he's not happy right now, but it's for the, it's for his, in his best interest. Right. And it's almost like, again, it's like training myself. Like, it's like, okay, I'll put him in the crate for five minutes and he's barking and like, okay. And that that feels, and then I'll let him out because I can't take it anymore. And it's like, okay, then the next time maybe I'll put him in for 10 minutes. Yes. Yes. I'm just training me for when you. For like the discomfort of hearing him bark and cry until I, you know, and not go,

not going to him. Totally. I remember having a sleep training app. And it was like train. It was basically like when you want to let them cry for a certain period of time. And it would tell you, okay, like two minutes and you hit the timer. And then it like counts down the two minutes and it lets you know like when you're allowed to go in and get him. So it was like someone else being like, okay, now you can go.

Right. And it like was played like soothing music in the intermediary while you're waiting for your two minutes or five minutes. It was supposed to like gradually get longer and longer. Smart. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to get some noise cancelling helped headphones. There you go.

That's going to help. Okay. Let's get into our show. If you guys have a voicemail that you want to leave us, you can call us at 646363-6-294. Or you can email us. at oversharing at betches.com. And if you guys want to subscribe, there should be a subscriber bonus episode already out for the month.

And you get two of those a month. You get all the episodes ad free and a day early. It's so fun to see our subscription episodes growing. It's really flattering that you guys really love this content and want to be part of this community. I'm preparing myself to talk about my triggered in our next subscription episodes. So I'm thinking about, I'm like kind of half over it, but I definitely want to. to share it with you. So yeah, you're going to get that too. Yeah, you're going to get Naomi at her,

you know, getting her own unqualified therapy session for me. Yeah, we'll do it. Yes. And again, all the episodes ad free and one day early. And if you want to get even more involved in, I would say, the ethos of oversharing, you can join one of Dr. Naomi's therapy groups. How do they do that? Yes. Come find me, Naomi Bernstein.com. You'll see all the info on groups. me a message, fill out a forum, we'll match you up with the group. And I really love meeting our listeners. And literally every single person that's entered our group from this show is awesome. It's a really fun space. So come join us. You can meet some like-minded oversharing listener-type people who are the best people as we've proudly proclaimed.

All right. Let's get into our emails. I'll read the first one. Hi, N&J. I've been a loyal listener from the beginning and subscriber from day one and have an overshare I'd like your advice on this week. I'll jump right in. I'm currently about 20 weeks pregnant with my and my husband's first child, and I'm wondering how to go about not posting my baby on social media when the time arrives. More and more, I've been learning more about the dangers of posting pictures of babies and children on social media. Not to get too in depth, but basically these days, they're making the majority of child sexual abuse images, aka child porn, using AI from screenshot, of people's kids on social media.

I sadly know how prevalent this is in our society as both my godfather and my sister's godfather were both found with hundreds, if not thousands of these images and went to jail. Wow. And these were two men that you would have never, ever suspected as being pedophiles, and it still haunts me to this day. But I am basically the last of my sisters-in-law's cousins and friends to have a baby. They have all extensively shared pictures and videos, some of them even daily to Instagram and Facebook. I'm afraid that with my heart stance on not posting, it'll come off as if I am

judging them for posting their kids online. And of course, I can just say, oh, who cares what they think? It's my baby. But I do care what they think because I don't want them to think that I'm thinking that they're a bad mom for posting pictures of their kids. I know the topic will be brought up at some point, and I just don't know how to tell everyone that I'm uncomfortable with putting my kids' face online without sounding like the judgiest, most self-righteous parent in the world. please help me navigate this conversation with my friends. Also, tips on how to politely tell older family to not repost pictures on their Facebooks, even though they've already posted hundreds of pictures of their other grandchildren online.

Thanks. An undersharing, Batch. P.S. And I am not planning on doing that dumb thing of posting a picture with an emoji over the baby's face. That's so stupid because, like, just don't post the picture. Yeah, I agree with that last part. Yeah, I get this. it's this whole thing is so scary and it's real and I could see why she's like,

no, I don't want my kid to have any risk of being part of that. Right. You think there's a lot of different like elements to this. There's like to me there's one like the and I think this is obviously like a newer, more hot button issue, the idea of like sharing pictures of children who can consent to having their pictures online online when there's like potential. potentially predators out there. It's the predator thing.

And now that I think the new thing is that they just take your kids face and they create like AI porn out of it. Right. Like that's, but can't they do that with your face with a regular porn? Like yeah. Like I just like to me it's like, again, I'm not, I'm not at all diminishing how like horrific it would be or the idea of like having your child's face put onto AI porn.

But to me there is a sense of, and again, maybe part of this is not having kids of my own. and not feeling that like it's like even more horrific than I already think it is. Right. But part of me is like there could be so many people with so many images with so many people you know and yourself. And like there's just absolutely no way to control it. Yeah. That I'm a little bit of the mindset of like there's just like it's like an open box.

It's like you don't mean. Someone could be taking my face. Like there's no way for me to not know that someone is taking my face and making it into like real porn that other people are watching. Like there's just. There's no way for me to control that. Yeah, they could take the class picture if you're, you know, from the school. Yeah, from a real yearbook or.

Right. And like turn it into, yeah. So I get your point is this almost feels like the Pandora's box is open and there's nothing you can do about it. Yeah. And I get not posting pictures of your children like in the bath or right without a diaper or whatever, you know, that I totally get. But I do feel like, one, it's.

seems like a little bit of an impossible task of keeping their face out of the no pictures of their face publicly anywhere at all. Right. That could be seen by anyone ever. I mean, even if you take a picture of it on your phone, it's like in the cloud, someone could get their hands on it somehow. Right. They're hacked.

I don't know. Like to me, it seems like a tough endeavor. You're trying to shove the genie back in the bottle. Right. And it's a fruitless effort to me. But I understand the, again, and maybe I'm. I'd feel differently when I have kids. Yeah.

I hear your point. I think it just probably makes her feel better and maybe helps her like sleep at night that she's minimizing that risk in whatever way that she can. And there's like, like you said, there's different layers. There's one like AI porn, which I think is particularly freaking her out because she had these people that were close to her that were engaged in that exact behavior. Right. So that feels like, whoa, this could be anything. This could be like the next door neighbor.

This could be my kid's teacher. Like this could be anyone. And I also realized she didn't ask us like what we think of this. So I'm just, she didn't ask. I'm just putting in my unsolicited thoughts on the matter. I realized she was like, that's not what I'm asking. She's determined that she doesn't want to do it. So let's help her with her actual question.

I think, you know, it's just in the way that you deliver it. And I think it will help if you can allow people maybe if you can share. directly with the people that you love and not have it be like online. Like I'm sure I don't know what they are either just through a text message or in a particular app where you can share with like selected close family members. You want to share photos that way. But I do think the conversation I think is in the delivery. And if you like, the best way to just ease all your fears is if you let people know what

you've been through personally on this. Right. And then it's kind of like, I'm not. judging you. This is personally a very triggering issue because of this thing that I went through. And I think there's no way that anyone's going to think that you're calling them a bad parent because you had a personal experience with someone very close to you with child porn. And you've chosen not to do that. I totally agree. I think it's all in the delivery. If the delivery is like, oh, I would never let my child put their face on like, that's crazy. There's so many things that could happen to them.

Like that sounds judgy. But like I had this horrible experience. it's given me a lot of anxiety. It's made me really anxious. Would you be open to download in this app so I can share pictures and maybe I'll just share directly or that's why I'm going to choose to do it X way, whatever way you decide to share? Or if you literally don't want to share, you could say that's why we've decided not to share. I don't see how they would think that that's you judging them. And I think if you're also very clear about I totally understand all the benefits of sharing,

it brings closeness for families and making. makes everyone feel more connected when we're far away. Like I think if you say it in a way that's like, I get why you do it. Yeah. You know, there's a part of me even that's torn if that's how you feel because I do want to have that connection. But the part of me that's fearful of this is just so strong that this is the way that I've decided to do it.

Yeah. I agree. I think putting everything in like I, me, my experience, my fear terms are doing that. And then here's the other thing. Like you do judge these people a little bit for. doing it. It's not a big deal. I think like the idea like I'm not judging them at all. Like we do things because we judge the way other things are done when they're done differently. Right. And so like I think people are so worried about coming off as judging when we're judging all

the time. Like I think we should just accept that we're always judging. It doesn't mean because I judge you, you shouldn't do it. It just means this is my judgment is that I think it's better to be done this way. Otherwise you wouldn't do it. Yeah. So I think it would be good. for you to own that. I don't think you need to say that. I don't think you need to come out with that. But I do think you're probably kind of like there might be a part of you. It's like I wish I could tell you. Maybe that's where she's struggling because it does seem in some ways like the answer's obvious. Just say it in a very kindhearted way where you're open to both sides. I think what she's really struggling with is this idea of like what she probably does really want to say is warn everyone.

It's really dangerous. Yeah. Like are, you know, I wish you would look into this. Like, look, you know, here's the facts. This happened to me. Like, it's really pretty scary. I wouldn't do it if I were you. And that's fine that you have the urge to do that. People do that with everything. Right. From politics to parenting to work, to work, to work, how you show up and what you wear to work or don't wear, whether you, you know, like you said, every time you make a decision on what you're going to do, you're judging somebody in some way. Right. who's doing it a little bit differently. You're deciding I like prefer this way to that way. Yeah. And what's the worst that could happen? They think they judge you for judging them or they judge you for being so strict. Yeah. They could say behind your back, oh, she's really crazy about this social media thing.

Like, seems like we could say exactly what I just said into in the beginning of this conversation, which was she didn't ask for, which is like she's climbing and she's an uphill battle. Like it's not nothing's going to, this isn't going to work. fine. Yes. But I will say just to, I'm like joking. I'm like joking. Like, you know what I mean. Yeah. I get it. I get it. But I, because I just want her to know that I think if you can minimize it and it makes you feel better to minimize it, minimize it. I do think like you said, eventually you're pissing into the wind because, you know, when she's out with her friends, I don't know, when your child

grows up and they go to a birthday party and someone takes a picture of them and post it online, there's not much you could do about it at that point. But for now, if it makes her feel better to have that control, take it and just say it nicely. But yeah, it's a good point. We all, you know, are judging and we can't escape it. And she's judging the people who put the pictures up with the, with the smiley face on it.

And I judge that too. I also think that's stupid. So validate it on that. But I'm just saying she's like, I would hate for people to think that I'm judging. But I'm also not going to do that dumb thing where you put. But it's like you're judging. It's fine.

Like, again, don't be afraid to be judgmental. That's why you make any decision. And again, I think it, the anecdote about the godfather definitely, like, if someone told me that they were, that they have like six alarm systems and the security guard. And for like, and that was all the information that I had, I would be like, they seem really like intensely paranoid. Totally. But if they were like, I was robbed and they took. all these things, I would be like, okay, that makes sense.

You're like on. Yes. Guard. Totally. And I have a lot of my kids, friends that are not allowed to do sleepovers, like at all. And I'm kind of like, I know, you don't have to tell me. I know where that comes from. Like something happened to you or someone that you know.

And now you don't allow sleepovers. And I'm like, I get it, you know? Like, even that, I don't even have to know that probably something. happen to somebody for you to just have like a no sleepover ever rule. So people, you have to do what your life experiences creates your fears. So it makes sense that, you know, she's feeling this way. And I think if you just explain it like that, I think they'll judge you less. Yeah. And again, if someone said, I think in this world, that's an uncommon belief. If someone said to me, I don't really want any pictures of them on social media, I would just

not do it because like I wouldn't care that much. Agreed. Okay. Let's do a betchesist. Do you want to read this one? I will read this. Hi, Jordana and Dr. Naomi. My boyfriend recently showed me a Facebook post from someone he went to high school with and I'd love to hear your thoughts on it. The post was a go-fund me created by a girl and her fiance asking for $25,000 in donations from friends and family to help them buy a house. They both have full-time jobs, no kids, and don't seem to be struggling financially. In the description they wrote about their dream of owning land, raising animals, getting married in their future backyard, and starting a family. As a thank you, donors would be invited to the wedding. Wow. Love it.

Lucky me. This bothered me since I've always thought of crowdfunding as a way to support people through medical emergencies, natural disasters, etc. So here's my question. Is it ethical to crowdfund a down payment for a house from friends and family on social media? I can't wait to hear your thoughts. sincerely, go fund me or go fund my dream life. This was a funny one. Yeah. I think that this is not unethical. They are stating very clearly what they're looking for money for.

They're not pretending they're, you know, they have an illness or they're raising money for a charity. Like they're being very, very clear. Is it tacky? Yeah. I think it's like, I think there's a difference between ethical and tacky. I think it's kind of tacky and like a little embarrassing. But I don't think.

It's unethical. Like there's nothing that these people have misled the public about. Yes. I would love to see the screenshots of how many donations they have. Like as of now, it's probably been, I'm just curious. So I agree with you. I don't think it's unethical. No one has to donate to this.

Right. Like it's totally optional. I wouldn't. Sounds like she wouldn't. I don't think you would. There's enough people that are. really suffering that if you're going to donate to a cause, it's not going to be this. It's going to be people who are like really down and out.

Right. Don't know where they're going to live. Don't have medical treatment, food, something like that. Is it unethical that they're asking? No. But I guess I am secretly hoping that they don't get a lot of donations because I would love to see that money going elsewhere. Yeah.

I definitely agree. I think it's tacky, which is why I'm really curious to see. I mean, I guess the other flip side is maybe what they're doing is they're calling it crowdfunding, but maybe it's like a registry for a house. Right. Almost like instead of a wedding registry, especially if you get invited to the wedding. Right. It's like a pre. They want to make their wedding here so they need to get pre wedding gifts. So they're just trying to get their wedding gifts ahead of time and then have the wedding. It's funny. They're like, they're basically like instead of making a registry, like, like,

planning a wedding and making a registry like a normal couple, exactly like you said. They're creating what is essentially a registry with just a cash fund instead of like items on the registry, which there's people who do that. I've seen people who just have cash funds. Since score to the same thing, it just looks a lot tackier. I'm surprised they like wanted to go this route. Yeah. And you're doing it before the way.

But I guess if I'm playing devil's advocate, you're kind of like, okay, we could spend $25,000 on a wedding. And then we basically like get the money back in some respects because people come and they give us the gifts. So they're just reversing the order. Right. They're kind of like, instead of spending $25,000 on a wedding, we'd like to buy this house, hold the wedding there. And we'd like you to give us the gifts in advance. It's kind of what they're saying. So that we can buy the house in question. Right. And if you really love us and care about our future, you will support this, you know, kind of out-of-the-box wedding plan that we have, which is you pay for our wedding and then you get to come to the wedding for free.

Right. It kind of assumes that people really want to go to your wedding, I guess, or help you build your dream. I mean, again, I think they're being very upfront. There's no deception. I don't think it's morally wrong, but it feels a little icky. I could see that. It does feel icky, although now the more I think about it, maybe they're just trying to, like,

turn the whole wedding industry on its head. Like we're going to, instead of like spending all this money on these big weddings, like let's help the couple buy a house and then they can like throw a little party in their house. A housewarming party. Yeah. And maybe it's better for everybody. It's better for the couple, obviously.

It's like more of an investment in them and their future than like paying a wedding hall where you don't see any of that money back. So almost feels like the woman who sent. out the text for her own meal train. Yes. Like there are some communities, I guess, where like everyone, it's almost like, and if we were living in more of a communist cabots type society, right? Maybe everyone would be paying towards this house just like inherently.

And then their house would be paid for it. But that's not really the society we live in, which is why this feels a little gross. Yeah, I agree. But I'm all about like flipping the wedding industry kind of on its head. This is a cool way to do it. I agree with you. It's tacky. I hope they don't get a ton of donations for it.

But I get the concept is like, you respect it, but you also. I respect the effort. I respect the effort and the like outside of the box thinking and how to like avoid these couples that are just have in order to start their life, they have to throw away $50,000 on a wedding. Well, they don't have to. Yeah. But sometimes it feels like. that, right? Right. But like if you're the kind of person who feels like they must have a wedding because

everyone else does, I would imagine you wouldn't be doing this. You're not going to. Yeah. Or like you would care too much about what other people thought about you to do this. True. Very true. Very true. So yeah, I agree. I think there's so many better things that you can be giving your money towards. But if the alternative is we give you money towards this after you've booked a wedding at a wedding hall or we give it to you now for this. Yeah. Yeah. I could see it.

I would actually respect it more if they were like instead of a wedding, we're having a big party entry. The entry price to come to the party is $100. So anyone who wants to come to the big party that we're having just pay through this scope on me. That would also probably. I guess you getting another email about that, but not unethical. Not unethical, but yeah, a little unpleasant.

strange. Yes. I'm pleasure. Judge. I mean, I would. Especially, if you scroll through GoFundMe, you can find a lot of things that are probably feel a lot better and worthy causes to give your money towards. Totally.

All right. Let's do some intentions. I will read them. Hi, Jordana and Dr. Naomi. I love you both. I look forward to your podcast every week. I need an intention.

I'm 25 and work as a school counselor. It is my dream forever to be a writer or content creator of sorts. I've always wanted to write a book, be a journal. or have a successful blogger podcasts. However, I feel so pessimistic about this, since I have no professional experience in the creative or journalism world and do not have a master's in the field.

I feel like it's impossible for me to succeed in something like this. I have this mental block where I don't even want to try making my own website or publishing articles and content because we already have so many people in the world who are successful writers, podcasters, bloggers, etc. It feels like people are becoming successful overnight. When I get excited and think about going for it,

my immediate thought is that it's a waste of time and that there is no way my ideas or I could be successful. Dr. Naomi, do you have an intention or advice on how to get over this slump and creative block? Duran, did you ever experience this when you started creating baches? You both inspire me so much, especially Duran's entrepreneurship. You were honestly my biggest inspiration. Sincerely a pessimistic big dreamer betch. Oh, that's nice to hear. Yeah, very sweet. What this makes me think of is something that I talk about actually in my groups a lot. because we talk about allowing and accepting and meditation, which feels very like, I'm doing nothing. I'm not working towards anything. I'm sitting here cross-legged breathing.

Right. Like this feels like a waste of time. Unproductive. And even like, okay, I, I, you know, I'm making what I'm making at my job. I'm just going to breathe into that. I'm going to allow that. I'm just going to live this humble life, like the White Lotus thing where he's like, who can live with nothing? That's who gets to live. To live. So it's almost like we talk a lot about like if you can tolerate living with very little and just accepting what you have, then, you know, and we do, like I did a meditation the other day where I'm like, you are in a tent in the forest on the floor by yourself. Allow that. Accept that. You have. You have. have no partner, you have no children, you have no, you know, boss that's telling you how amazing

you are. So like the idea of just, if you're single, just accepting that you're single, if you don't have kids, accepting that you don't have kids, if you aren't satisfied in your career, accepting that you're not satisfied. And people are like, that sucks. Right. Like, I don't want to do that. Like, I want to be happy. And I think that getting these things is going to make me happy. So the solution or part of what we do is in the allowing and the quieting of the mind around the noise of how do I get this blog started? How do I get to write this book? How do I get to do this next thing? Once you can just like sink into the life that you already have and I think I am getting there coming back to this listener is like allowing yourself to connect and have that

voice and speak whatever it is that you want to speak first. Like just you're a school counselor, I don't know, write something about whatever it is that you're seeing and doing that people can relate to, that people can connect to. So kind of like connecting first without seeking the next step of it. And then if you can really quiet the noise and lean in, the best of what you have to say is going to come out because you're going to be focused and you're going to be present and you're going to be in your life as a counselor with your friends, living your thing, you know, doing what you do,

noticing things that then you can write about when you're mindful and you're present. And then that gift of connection, then you can figure out where you want to go with it. But sometimes like when you're looking 10 steps ahead, you're almost like you're not going to be as good at whatever it is that you want to do. Right. And less successful. I agree.

I think she's very like results driven here. when, I mean, I'll talk about, she said she respects the entrepreneurship of Betches. Like when that started, I was a college senior completely fucking around. Like,

not thinking, like, how am I going to make, how am I going to be the biggest blog, be the most successful person in this thing? Like, we were literally just having fun. Yeah. And doing what felt natural exactly like you're talking about.

Like with not, with the idea that like, if it went nowhere, that would be totally fine. We weren't even thinking about where it would go. And I think the idea of like, I have to be making a full living on this.

I have to be a huge success or like why even bother really almost like stifles all creative energy. And I think there's this idea of like it's embarrassing to try and not have it not work out. And I think that's the ego part of it. Yeah. Like I'm only one to do it if I'm like,

I do it. and everyone thinks it's great. Or I only want to do it if I do it and I can make so much money by doing it. Where, like, if you do it exactly what Naomi was saying, where you kind of get back to, like, what is it you want to say, having absolutely nothing to do with anyone else's opinions, if you're just in a you and a tent in the woods and no one ever saw this. Right. I think just start.

That would be my advice to her would be if she wants to be a writer or a, so. social media person, just create an account, just start posting on it with no expectations, with the expectations of in the scenario where no one even sees this, I have no followers, I'm just posting it. I'm enjoying this. Yes. And that's where I think you'll see more, I think you'll naturally see more success, even though again, I think the pursuit of it is sort of what makes it less likely. Yes. Because you're trying too hard. Like anything else, like when you're, when you have this like desperate energy, it doesn't come off. authentic. It doesn't come off like connecting to people. I think just like do it for you and see what

happens. Maybe some people will like it. Maybe they won't. Either way, you'll do it for you. Yes. That is the beauty of a passion project. It's like it's supposed to be fun along the way. Yeah. So if it doesn't end up going anywhere, it's no harm, no foul because you enjoyed it. You felt like you were in that flow state while you were doing it, which either felt like fun or funny or just engaging and your thoughts were quiet while you were doing it. It's the way the best art, I think is created. So yeah, I know it's a tall order because I think you hit the nail on the head where like the idea of doing it, putting it out there. And like I don't even think it needs to be like, and everybody, I'm starting a blog. Not at all. Just start saying things. Right.

And if people like what you have to say, then, you know, they'll want to hear more. And it will build on itself. Right. And also she, like, I think there's this idea of everyone who starts these things become so successful, everything you see when it's like you don't, you don't actually, you only see the ones that are doing well. There's millions and millions of other things that have failed that you just don't see because they haven't skyrocketed to success. So there's way more of those than you think. And again, the beauty of the world that we live in today where you can create a blog or a podcast and then be an overnight sensation is that there's very little like barrier to entry. Yes.

So and you don't need a master's like she's saying. You don't need a master's. You don't need an investment from someone to just start a blog or open a Instagram account. Like you can just try it with absolutely no downside and see how it feels. Totally. I mean, you're a school counselor. There's so much there for. you to be present in. And I don't know if that's what you want to write about, but I can imagine it's

like the inner workings of like these children that are developing and adolescents and how they're engaging together and how they interact. Like if you're really present, one, you're going to enjoy your job more, your current job that actually pays the bills. And there's probably a lot of good stuff there. Like I love going to like those kind of big school things to just watch. how these kids are interacting and, you know, their little insecurities coming out and how their friendships are forming. Like, there's so much good stuff there that if you're present and you're watching and you're a counselor, so you're in it, I would allow, accept lean in there and then try to connect outside of the world after you've shared your voice or after you found your voice,

I should say. So the intention that I wrote is first find presence, then connection. then seek for the next thing. So clear your mind, be where you're at, then find what your voice, whatever it is that you have to share, and then look for, you know, a bigger following. I love that. And it kind of brings me back to your original thing about gardening.

Maybe that's what you should do with gardening, not be so results driven. Yes. Are you enjoying yourself? Are you at it? Yeah, it's so funny because it's true. went to the we went to we actually went to Walmart to get plants which probably isn't the best start I don't know how good the Walmart plants are but they're cheap.

So maybe it is a good start because you're again low barrier to entry. You're experimenting. Yes. Yes. Exactly. And I went with the kids and I was like first I was like, okay, everybody gets to pick one plant. So of course they're picking these like big beautiful like very fragile, you know, the biggest plants that are yeah, they're like in there.

First of all, they're like probably indoor plants. whatever. They just wanted the prettiest plants. And then I'm like, and I was kind of squashing them because I'm like, why don't we look at the perennials? Because I'm like, let's look at these plants that you plant them once and they come back every year like you're going to get. And they went over to the perennial section and they're kind of like, these aren't pretty. Like they're kind of like shrub looking, you know. So it was like I was doing the thing where I'm like, it's looking so far into the future. Right. You want the successful gorgeous yard with the. Right. work, yeah. Right. Like we're three years from now, all these plants that we build on a random

Sunday that we plant on a random Sunday afternoon are going to still be growing where I'm like, all right, if they want to plant like this, you know, plant that really probably doesn't grow well in a hundred degree heat out in the sun, okay, let's, you know. Let's have some fun. Enjoy the moment of planting it and seeing it in the ground. It'll last at least a couple days. They'll enjoy the feeling of doing it. We all get caught up in this. Taking our own advice. to this listener. Totally. All right. Let's do triggered. Okay. I will read the first triggered. Hi, Dr. Naomi and Dr. Dan, a huge fan of your work. I have a triggered scenario, so I'll jump right into it. As a bit of background, I, 31 female and my husband 32 male are child free by choice and do not have

any future plans to have children and are very content being dog parents. When asked about our future plans, we have been very open with our friends and family about this life choice. so does by no means something we are secretive about. We've always phrased this decision as personal to us while also expressing so much happiness and support for our friends who have chosen to have children. By and large, our friends and family are progressive and wonderful about making us feel included

and accepted for what many would consider an alternative lifestyle. Now to the triggered scenario. My husband and I were recently sent an Evite for a friend's son's first birthday party. In the Evite, the guest list was visible to anyone who received the Evite. while I didn't notice at first, another friend pointed out to me that my husband and I were the only people listed by name. For example, John and Jane Smith, whereas everyone else with children were listed as a family, for example, the Smith family.

At first, I didn't feel very triggered. I assumed that maybe it's just the etiquette for addressing a couple on an invitation, but the more I thought about it, the more it started to niggle at me. The next time I saw the friend who sent the invite to clarify not at the first birthday party, I pointed this difference out and asked out of curiosity for her reasoning for addressing couples differently from couples with children. She responded by saying, well, you don't have children, so you aren't a family. Wow. Yeah. Why would I refer to your situation as having a family? Her response absolutely floored me. I've always thought of my husband, my dog, and myself as a family, and it was kind of devastating to realize that others might not see us as a family.

This also feels like a really outdated definition of family. Do I have the right to feel deeply triggered by my friend's response? Thanks for all you do, a baffled betch. That's crazy that someone would say that to her. Yeah. The intensity. Like, why would I refer to you as a family when she was clearly coming with like an insecurity about that or feeling hurt by that in some way?

If she hadn't spoken to the friend, I would say this would be low on the triggered scale because I do think it's like when there's a couple and then they have two kids, it's like you don't have to write out all of their names on the E-Bite. So it's just easier to say, like, if I were going to send you a card, I would just write the Bernstein family because I'm not going to write out every single person's name in your family. And so, but for two people, it might just be easier to write the two of their names, especially if they share the same last name.

So I didn't think that was triggering. But when addressed to say you're not a family is really crazy. Yeah, really crazy, really hurtful. I'm sure that's part of her insecurity. And I think that is when people choose not to have children. I'm sure that is part of if there is a back and forth, and I totally get respect that choice. I think that's probably an insecurity. Like it feels a little bit less like a family. Even though it is, it doesn't have that the full embodiment of that term that maybe it would if you have kids. And so there's already that insecurity there. I think that was really actually mean. Yeah. Of what the friend said. Like what was. Yeah. What would be like

the purpose? And maybe she was feeling defensive of the way she wrote it. But yeah, I mean, it's, it's interesting because while we were just even talking about this, I googled defined family. Oh, okay. Well, the first thing that comes up is a little offensive. It says a group of one or more parents and their children living together as a unit. Okay. Which seems a little outdated. I mean, some people, some children live with their grandparents. Yes. I would still say they were a family. Some children live with an aunt or an uncle.

Right. And then the second version is all the descendants of a common ancestor, which also doesn't really work for her. Right. But then if you go to the health resources and services administration, the definitions of the family is a family of a group of two or more persons related by birth, marriage, or adoption who live together. Right.

That sounds more. That sounds closer. Yeah. But I will say that Merriam Webster does define a family as two parents wearing their children. But that seems outdated to me. Yeah, I definitely agree. I mean, I would venture to guess. I know this maybe is a little woo-woo, but like family is like feeling, you know,

and your friends should be able to pick up on the feeling of who your family is. Like it's almost like if someone moves here from a foreign country and we had this question on like a wedding situation or maybe it was like a, you know, a holiday situation. Like if you move here by yourself and your family is living thousands of miles away and you have a friend group, like I would say if that's how you identify as like that's who your family is, I think that should be respected as your family. I agree. And especially about your friend who like, that's just like a not nice thing to say.

Yeah. She must have been felt like you were attacking her in some way or just. getting defensive about how she addressed the invitation. Right. So was she saying that she doesn't have a family? What were you looking for in the conversation? I don't know. Maybe you were looking for her to say it was just easier to write, you know,

I just used family so I don't have to, like what you said about writing out the kids' names. Right. Maybe that's the explanation that you were looking for. But maybe she did feel, if I'm seeing the other side, I don't know how that came off when she addressed it. Maybe what she could have said instead was, this is my family. And I felt a little bit, you know, it felt a little bit strange that everyone else's said family and mine said this. And it just kind of, you know, made me feel upset. And I want to let you know that this is, you know, we, I do consider us a family like me and my partner and the dog. Right. So maybe she didn't come at it in a vulnerable way. Maybe she came at it what felt like an

interrogation. I think this friend was really mean. I will say that, but I'm wondering why she was so mean. Maybe she's just mean or maybe she did address it in a way that felt a little bit like accusatory. Yeah, maybe she has her own feelings of her own judgment towards herself for having kids that she needs to judge like, do you know what I mean? Maybe she feels the need to pride herself so much on having children as what gives her a family that she needs to say that you don't to make herself feel better about her own choices. Yeah, I can see that happening. Yeah, when you're like, and, you know, I get being, you know, child free by choice.

You have all the freedoms. You don't have to leave the bar. You don't have to like worry about vacation, all the everything, so many reasons. And I think some people that are living it and that are struggling to manage it and to feel okay, they might have to say, well, at least it allows me to know that I'm part of a family and you're not, which is really, it's sad that we have to do that to feel okay with our own choices. But that might be part of what's happening here. But yeah, triggering for sure, I'm going to give this, this response was pretty brutal.

I'm going to give us an eight. Okay. I was going to say seven, but I'm okay with an eight. Again, if it was just the, it was just the Evite, I would say like three, two, three. But then response when asking about it and good for her for asking about it, if made her uncomfortable would be seven or seven and a half, let's say. Yeah, I mean, because there's two statements here. If this is actually what she said, well, you don't have children so you aren't a family,

first sentence, second sentence, why would I refer to your situation as having a family? Yeah, not nice. So those two, I mean, look, I guess if you look at the dictionary definition, she's right. Right, but she's not like the Census Bureau. She's like, she's her friend. Exactly. So it's like a feeling. You know that she identifies this as her family.

If you're her friend at all, you've got to know that that's, you know, giving her family vibes. So that's why this is so mean. And she's coming to you. Even if she said, like, I didn't want you to think the dog was invited. So I didn't write family. That would have been better. That might be part of it. All right.

Well, validated. That's rude. Agree. All right. Let's move on. Okay. Our next segment is something a little bit different. It's sponsored by American Home Shield.

Being a first time homeowner can be difficult for a lot of reasons. Just finding the right home for you could be tough enough in the first place. And then you have to keep it all running smoothly. How did our parents make it all look so easy? So in this segment, planting roots will be answering your questions around some of the more difficult moments that come with being a homeowner. Leave your stress at the door and we'll help you unpack. All right, I'll read this.

Hydrogen and Dr. Naomi, I have a triggered scenario. I'm a 32-year-old female living in a city. I'm a successful professional and for the most part, I'm pretty self-sufficient. Three years ago, I purchased a home in the city I live in. Buying a house was a big dream of mine. And while it would have been ideal to do it with a partner, I didn't and still to this day, don't have one. But rates were low, my lease was up, I pulled the trigger and bought a house. I went through this process entirely by myself, along with my realtor, mortgage broker,

and inspector. I also had my current roommates come and see the houses with me throughout the process. Buying, then moving into and decorating the house was a huge accomplishment for me that brought me a lot of pride in myself and my independence. However, one thing triggered me throughout this time. And in working with a new therapist, I've realized it's still pretty triggering. During the house hunting and moving process, my parents who live an hour drive away and have a very flexible schedule and are able-bodied and fit people didn't come to see the house or help with any part of the physical process. They didn't take interest in seeing the house before their daughter made a 30-year

investment. They didn't help with the move. They didn't even come see the house for at least three months after I moved in. I will say my dad did generously help me by gifting me money for the down payment so that I would reach the threshold to not pay PMI. I am grateful for the financial support and view that act of generosity as him supporting my decision to buy this house. I can't help but feel that this was a really huge life decision and accomplishment that was overlooked and under-celebrated by my family. As I mentioned, I'm single

so I don't have a partner to rely on or celebrate with. There's a lot of family history and dynamics with financial support and places of emotional support. The fact that I'm still kind of dwelling on this three years later makes me think, how triggered can I be? Thanks, a 30-year investment in myself. When I read this, I was wondering, like, what is going on? Why are they leaning out so much on this? And this might be a jump. I could be off, but I wonder if there is some unspoken resentment about her moving, like setting up roots in that city versus maybe closer to where they live. But they're close, aren't they? Aren't they an hour?

An hour. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know what their dynamic is. Maybe they thought eventually like first off, congrats on buying a house in any city. Yeah. Because that's awesome.

Like being able to buy a house in a city is really cool. But maybe they kind of always thought that she would like move out by them kind of of thing. I mean, I'm just trying to figure out why they would be so like, you know, let me come see it. You know, what do you bought? Whatever, all the things.

I had another thought also. I mean, some that might be an underlying the thing. Because they do, she is an hour away. But I do think that there is a thing among parents where they see the greatest accomplishment for a female daughter as getting married and having a partner. And they think the order of things should be partner, house, child, whatever it is. And I think that for women, it's not as celebrated when they, you know, We reached financial kinds of milestones like this.

And people don't really seem to take it as seriously as if she had a boyfriend or something like that. And so maybe because she's buying this house on her own, maybe there's like an element of them being a little bit disappointed or seeing this as her like giving up on finding a partner or seeing this as her not prioritizing finding a partner, which maybe is more of a priority for them than for her. Yeah, I can totally see that. And I do think there is a thing.

and I've seen this a lot in my practice where if a woman is single and she's like too into her career, their parents think like somehow that's the problem. Yeah. Yes, hindering her. Like you should be less into your career, which is crazy way of thinking. I mean, I've never heard someone say this to their son. Right. Yes.

Right. Like you're, you know, somehow you're not, it doesn't leave you enough time to be dating or you don't care enough about dating. And I've seen this a lot where it's almost like the parents think if they're successful and she's focusing on buying this house and they're doing well in their career that somehow they're not trying at dating. Like they don't care about meeting someone. And maybe she doesn't. She doesn't really talk about that. But like she probably, I'm assuming, is open to that and wanting to find a partner. But I think the parents might think she's focusing on the wrong things. I agree with you. I have seen that happen often. And it's probably one of the things

that I'll often say. And I don't, we're going off on a tangent. We don't know if this is the case. But sometimes it does help to just, I get you don't want to share every date that you go on because it doesn't work out. Then you have to explain it. And some parents ask a million questions and they get all anxious and it doesn't work. But if that's not them, sometimes it does help to just kind of be like, I'm dating. Like just because I'm doing well. my career and buying a house doesn't mean that I'm not trying to find a partner if you are if you're not all power to you but like sometimes that is a dynamic where you're just not sharing and so therefore they think that what you are sharing which probably feels better to share something that you're

successful in that you're doing well so you're sharing all that you're not sharing any of the facts that you've you went out with a guy or a girl or it didn't work out or whatever the thing is that you're doing like you're not sharing that because it probably feels like more emotional and frustrated and like not the most fun thing to talk about, but then they think that you're not even, you're not even looking for that. Totally. And then I think the third thing,

which is the most likely thing, which she wrote right in her email, there's a lot of family history and dynamics with financial support in place of emotional support. This kind of seems maybe the family is not that good at communication, at expressing love, at expressing support.

And they do so by, you know, there's many people like that who feel uncomfortable with emotions, who feel uncomfortable with, like, getting too involved. And so they throw money at things to sort of like make themselves feel like they're involved. And the dad gave her money. So he's probably like, okay, like I showed the support in the way that I know how to show support, which is paying for things.

Right. Yeah. And that's hard. You know, I think even if they didn't do the, you know, quality time, acts of service, whatever you want to call it, piece of like coming out and seeing her new house and like helping her. It's hard. it really is very hard. I'm going to validate how hard it is to make a purchase like this alone.

Like with no one to bounce ideas off of, of like, is this a good idea? Did you talk to the inspector? Do you think it looks good? You know, is it a good price or is it the right area and not have someone, either a partner or parents that are going to kind of be your sounding board? Yeah. Even just to run things by. It's like a lot of pressure. It's a lot. And I'm happy for her that she has a strong friend network that, you know, came to look at houses with her and supported her in that way. But it does suck to not feel like you have anyone to, you know, go through the day-to-day weeds of the mortgage process of all that other stuff with, which is stressful and which is, again, a huge accomplishment. So I can totally see that. I wonder if she invited them and they said no. Like she

doesn't really say. She said they didn't come out. They didn't ask her to look. Like, I don't know what the dynamic is. If she asked, I think this is more triggering if she said, would you come look at these houses with me or what do you think of this house and they're just not really giving her anything back versus. Right. Because maybe if that's kind of like the style of the way things have gone, they're just kind of used to that or they don't think that you want their opinion or they don't think you value their opinion. Like, I think if she asked and they said no or didn't seem interested, I would say this is like a seven or an eight. And if she didn't ask, I think like, maybe say, like, I would have loved for you to have seen it before I bought it or I would have loved for you to come over

earlier. Like, did she invite them earlier? Is she expecting them to want to go? Sometimes these dynamics feel like no one wants to do something different because they don't want to make the other person uncomfortable. Right. I do think there is some responsibility for her. And I wonder if she did, hey, the inspector's coming on Friday. Would you mind coming and like helping me talk to him or be here over the inspection? Like if you're not asking, maybe they don't want to overstep. I'm sure there's more to it. But I do think there's probably a dynamic where everyone's kind of pulled back emotionally. And now here we are with you feeling completely alone and abandoned. I could see why these issues. are coming to the surface now as you're making this big decision all by yourself. Yeah. And they might think, oh, she's so independent. She bought this house. She doesn't even like, she likes to do everything on her own. Yeah. I don't want to like get in her way. Yeah. I think in this next chapter of your life, it might be good to at least try. I don't know if you

have. You didn't say it, but you did say the emotions are not their best thing. But maybe just try in a way where you can, you know, just let them know, like I want to be close to you. And I would love for you to be more involved in my life. Yeah. In an emotional way, not necessarily a financial way. Yeah, or at least showing up, right? Just like, come over. She said they eventually came to see the house.

But if you have decisions to make, like let's say you need a new roof or something down the line, like call them and be like, hey, this is what I was told. I need a new roof. Like, what do you think? Can you help me decide if you think, you know, invite them in a little bit? I do think it happens where people tend to get very private sometimes with their parents because their opinions are different. They don't really value their judgment.

Sometimes parents can get a little overbearing, whatever it is, that your parents' input doesn't make you feel good. It makes you uncomfortable. You have to argue with them or fight with them about it. So then you end up pulling back and becoming really private. Yeah. Then they're like, okay, I guess this is what you want. You want to just, I have to let you do your thing.

So I would just be mindful. And again, we don't have enough information. But I would be mindful of if you are sending out like very private vibes, like my life is mine and I don't really want your input and then being upset when they're not giving you their input. Yeah. So I think again, like if she asked them to be involved and they said no, seven or eight crazy, if she didn't say anything and she just kind of wanted them to be more proactive, I could still see being a little annoyed about that. but I don't think it's as upsetting. I would give that a three or four. I could agree.

Maybe I'd say four or five on the, just because like it's a big deal when your kid buys a house, it's like, you know, second to like having a baby. It's a big commitment. It's like for them not to want to come see it. Yeah, if she had a baby and they didn't come see it for three months, I think that would be like societally seen is a lot crazier. Right. So I, and they only live an hour away.

So, yeah, I could see why this is triggering, but I do think it's good to explore your role in this distant dynamic. Yes. Because they might be viving off of you more than you realize. Yes. Well, good luck. Let us know if you have that conversation. Yeah. Love a good follow up.

Please send those follow ups. We hear you guys. We hear your problems. And then nothing. Yeah, nothing. We think about you all the time. Yeah. How you're doing.

I do. I do. I really sometimes sit and wonder. like how something turned out. So let us know. Yes. All right. So thank you guys for writing in.

And thanks again to American Home Shield for partnering with us for this segment. Taking care of your home could be a hassle. But American Home Shield makes it easier to keep your appliances and home system running smoothly. Don't worry. Be warranty. Visit AHS.com slash oversharing to get 20% off any plan today and to see the promo details. That's aHS.com slash oversharing. See aHS.com slash contracts for coverage details, including.

limit amounts, fees, limitations, and exclusions. All right. Well, we did it. We helped some people today. I'm proud of us. Me too. All right. That's our time. Great work today.