Podcast: The Ride - Disneyland Mobile App with Jessica McKenna

Episode Date: November 15, 2024

If Walt Disney were alive today he would surely say, “To all that come to this happy place, welcome. Make sure your phone is fully charged because our app is going to drain the hell out of your battery.” Jessica McKenna (Off Book Podcast) returns to tap, swipe and get frustrated at Disneyland's clunky ass app. "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea (Tokyo DisneySea Version) with Matt Mazany" episode is up at: Patreon.com/PodcastTheRide  FOLLOW PODCAST: THE RIDE: https://twitter.com/PodcastTheRide https://www.instagram.com/podcasttheride BUY PODCAST: THE RIDE MERCH: https://www.teepublic.com/stores/podcast-the-ride PODCAST THE RIDE IS A FOREVER DOG PODCAST https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/podcasts/podcast-the-ride Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forever. Dog. Warning, the following podcast may contain surprising sheet cakes, eye contact disagreements, evil little laughter, and trivia questions about Walt Disney World drainage situations. All that plus, Jessica McKenna returns to talk about the Disneyland app on today's podcast the ride welcome to podcast the ride a theme park podcast whose lore is as hard to navigate as the Disneyland app.

My name is Mike Carlson. Joining me as always, Jason Sheridan. Hi, yes. Very difficult to navigate both. Yes. We have a lot of unnecessary animations that really slows everything down and heats your phone up. Yeah. I was thinking about, I actually was thinking about this. This joke must have come from the fact that I was listening to Doughboys earlier today and I was like, yeah, they don't throw out as many weird

references that must confuse a new listener. Where like, there's like, yeah, it's a theme park podcast, but they talk about Grandpa Munster a lot. And there's lore about Grandpa Munster that they're talking about. What do they mean? I just want to hear about the ride. I just want to hear like, does it go fast or slow? Tell me if it goes fast or slow and if they like it let me ask you a question is this

integrated marketing for doughboys is this like on the office when they would talk about their new hp computer so you think i'm advertising for doughboys right now covertly yeah yeah but trying to make it seamless yeah yeah uh i wish it i wish it was doing that because they would be paying us right that's how it works That's how integrated marketing works I guess no it's not I'm just giving them a free plug And saying their show is funny Let's bring in our guest from the off book podcast I can barely say it

Because it's so good It's Jess McKenna back on the show It's been ages Jess how are you Oh thank you so much for having me I have a lot of opinions about Doughboys Go ahead please about Doughboys. Oh, go ahead, please. No, I know. Love Doughboy.

It's good. Today, we do have a very important topic. Yeah. And I'm not saying that facetiously. No. This is a topic that, so Scott is gone. This is an episode that we've been calling it Scott Free. Here I am getting off.

Scott is on hiatus. Yes, you're getting off Scott Free. We've been getting off Scott Free for a few few weeks now being little rascals talking about all sorts of off-topic things we've been doing exactly you get it oh yeah i don't even need to explain it no no no we do have a little giggle that happens a fiendish little giggle that happens um but people probably will see the title of this episode and think oh this is mike and jason getting away with something they've wanted to talk about for a long time. And Scott has been stopping it. That is not the case.

Not true. This is a guest suggested topic. Yeah. Disneyland app. I pitched this. You pitched this. Yeah. I think we talked a couple, like two months ago, maybe.

And boy, I was so excited because Scott would be here if he was not on hiatus. He would be doing the episode with us, but that gave us the license to do it. And now people are going to think that we're doing something. This is not like a recess appointment when Congress is gone and we just get to force something through.

This is- Topical reference, Michael. I love talking about recess appointments, even not during the hellish few weeks of politics that we're going through right now. I'm a big recess appointment joke maker. I make this reference a lot. All right.

So I just want to be on the record for liking that joke. So, yeah. So, yeah, you texted and I said, is there anything you want to talk about? And you said Disneyland app. It was like the first thing. And my heart swelled. I was so excited about it because boy have i want to talk about this app forever and we've talked about it in little like pieces but finally we're going to

dedicate three four five hours however long it goes to talking about the disneyland app uh so yeah just tell us why this was your choice okay so i think you know we um we share, I love theme parks and I love Disneyland. Yeah. And I love giving people in my life a positive experience at Disneyland. Yes. I take that role very seriously. I grew up 15 minutes from Disneyland. I can hear the fireworks from my childhood home.

I grew up with an annual pass you know used to go a ton and i've watched like you know if people come here from not growing up here or they only got to go to like disney twice in their whole growing up whether world or land right and they don't have the like dexterity of knowledge that someone who's gone a bunch has right so it falls on you to be the leader because you know you have the ability yes but what i have found is that the app is just like i just end up feeling so like handcuffed to this like completely joyless experience with because you were saying when you get the goods it feels amazing yeah so it's like a double-edged sword because obviously it's created like a certain ease because before

the app i was also the person in the party who'd be like give me all your tickets i'm gonna sprint to big thunder to get us fast passes yeah you're not gonna move through the crowd as well as i will on my own you guys take your time in the trail line. Meet me back at Star Tours. One person getting back through the line is not the end of the world. Go get in line for Star Tours. I'm going to sprint over to get fast passes for Big Thunder.

You know, I would gamify it that way. And that was a little more exciting. Maybe that was also age. Like, maybe I was like 17, showing like cousins from out of town around or something like that. Sure. Felt exciting. Or like 17 showing like cousins from out of town around or something like that felt exciting or like my first summer back from college my college boyfriend came out and i was like you're not gonna believe how well i know my way around here and that you know there's a

certain pride in being able to do that a certain pride and be able to be a good guide for disneyland when people are like oh it's gonna be so crowded it going to be so tough and you're like hey i got you i'm going to minimize the negatives and optimize the positives but i think just like everything else in our society we fall into this like faux trap of maximum optimization yes that is depriving me of the joy not to mention that i'm here with my nephews and niece wanting to make glorious memories and I have to have my face down on the phone literally the entire day. Yes, yes.

That all, that rings a lot, very true to me. I still feel like on some level, I'm the hero of the group. Yes. And I still feel like, I went with family a couple of weeks ago and Rise of the Resistance had been closed and all of a sudden we saw it was open

and like we now have our daughter with us, but can't obviously go on that she's not old enough yet but i just start yelling at the family go go rise of resistance open now i'll stay behind i'll watch her don't worry you haven't done it yet so like i'm still i feel like i get my like hero moments here and there in the park but i've always felt like i wanted to be the ambassador because how many times did you run into somebody go, why do you go that often? Yeah, totally. And you go, go with me. Yes, you haven't gone with me.

Exactly, yeah. Because like, I don't know what it is. My sister didn't get bit by the bug. My mom was a great theme park mom. This was back when the only navigation you had to decide was which way you started the circle. Are you going down Main Street and you starting left or you starting right? That was the big decision.

And then you worked through the park however you wanted. I would choose Chaos back then. Really? Well, I would go to... I would be like, all right, we're going to Tomorrowland and then we're going to cross the hub and go to Adventureland. Yeah, that's totally reasonable. Just trying to hit the big rides. Exactly.

You're like, can we sprint to Space Mountain and try to get it and then start our circle the other way? Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Totally. And my brother and his wife love it. Going once in a February break with my brother, brother his wife and their three kids and my mom they have gone to world a bunch yeah my sister-in-law was that's the only time i've gone where i felt like i had a partner in the app where she like knew how to navigate it too this was also

right coming out of covid where you literally couldn't get food without the app like yeah yeah so that was also a dark time where you'd be like seriously i just want a skewer from bengal barbecue and the next opening is 320 yeah yeah and i can't just like walk up and get a skewer yeah remember this that was a dark time one of the darkest parts of the pandemic yes and i was i just couldn't get a skewer at bengal barbecue and not to mention you couldn't sit anywhere around there. Yes, right. You had to kind of roam. You had to roam.

I used to think the most annoying thing was going up to cast members and go like, hey, I'm a little early. Can I get my skewer? But they were probably more annoyed by me banging on pots and pans when they delivered the skewer

to thank them for being there. They let you bring pots and pans into Disneyland. Yeah. If it's to thank essential workers. Yeah, of course. Yeah. Which I still do every day.

My neighbors hate me. And they're all essential workers. Yeah. They're like, I worked the most insane double shift and you are waking me up. Yes, please stop. Please stop.

Please stop. Yeah, that has gone back down a little bit, which that part's okay. Yeah. The fact that you can maybe pre-order food or I still find the reservation game extremely hard to crack. Like everything's always gone by the time I've bought tickets. Like in terms of if I wanted to reserve like a sit-down restaurant. But then like I'll just walk up and they'll be like, yeah, we can get you into Oga's Cantina.

Like I feel like they can always get me into Oga's Cantina. Right. Youina. Right. You can. Yes. That is something that happens a lot where you look at it and it says you can come back in six hours or you can ask a person. But then what I've noticed lately is that if you sometimes like refresh, you can get different times. If like, since there's a couple of different places in Disneyland where you can just add yourself to the wait list right there in the app. Right.

It's like the Carthay Lounge. Yes, you have to be close. You have to be inside and you have to be close. But if you refresh it, sometimes the time will change because some other people will have their time in their cart, essentially, on their app. So then they'll let it go. And all of a sudden, it was 60 minutes. Now it's 15 minutes.

So then that's another element that I just started picking up on recently. Another element to checking that both satisfies my brain, but also makes me have a worse time. Right. So. Because you're looking at your phone. I mean, I think I always bring up is there was a time at Disney World, and I would guess it's between like 2010 to 2014, and they were really trying to get people off their phones. You know, the iPhones are starting to get like mass adopted,

Android's coming out. The first few Android phones are out. And so they're like, all right, we'll put little games in the queues for people to play. We'll put games or statues with plaques and like an interactive stuff. And by 2014, they're like, no app use phone. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. There's so many. I don't know. I guess they were like people get these animals get so bored in this cage that we need to do something to entertain them. So they tried having like exterior things to have fun with and that didn't seem to work. And then they did the phone thing. And there was that like there was that space mountain game you would play and you could So they tried having exterior things to have fun with, and that didn't seem to work. And then they did the phone thing.

And then there was that Space Mountain game you would play, and you could get to the front of the line if you won. Oh, I don't even remember that. But it was the worst game you've ever played in your life on your phone. And it took up the whole time in line. And meanwhile, most people in line, if they're in a big family group, they're just playing heads up. Yes. Everybody's playing till still...

There was a time when I feel like I saw every other four people, but now it's like still pretty popular. Yeah. But that is more fun than, at least you're engaged with everybody. Yeah. Yeah. But this was some like game where I'm like flying a rocket and I'm trying, I don't even remember what it was.

My favorite was when I was like in second grade and Indiana Jones came out and I would just, you know, wait in a two and a half hour line as like an eight-year-old and that was just the reality of the situation and they gave us these AT&T sponsored decoder cards the decoder cards yeah and that was like pretty fun to be like yeah yeah this message says drink water ha it's above a water fountain that's funny you know like that's the other part is like taking my uh nephews and uh niece if they have to wait for 20 minutes they're like oh this line and i want to just like scream yeah because i'm like i well your parents have spent so much additional money to keep you from having to wait in a line you know and and i'm not their parent but i'm like

close enough to be like hey absolutely no complaining this is a very expensive day and people are working really hard to make sure you have a good time and they'll be like right right right but how much longer like so they'll catch themselves on tone or like right we can't complain but they still don't internalize that disneyland used to be right you had to wait in so many long lines and you were lucky if you got on seven rides. I can now curate a day for them where they get on 15 rides. Right.

Get to repeat eight- You have such knowledge and ability Eight-year rides, yeah. that they don't even realize how good they have it. No, they don't.

My daughter doesn't know this. She's two years old, but she doesn't understand that daddy's giving her a better situation than a lot of these kids with parents that don't know shit right well anything that's the other thing is like the knowledge gap keeps getting bigger and bigger and like there's these cottage industries about like okay you're not good at it i'll make an itinerary for you and like yes right right and just the and then not to mention the financial bummer of like okay so now you're just assuming that everyone has to have a smartphone like yeah and you're rewarding people who have more money who can buy a 20 front of the

line ticket for rise of resistance for party six spend 120 more dollars to get to the front i mean the like bummer capitalism side of it is like pretty tough versus like everyone used to get a fast pass and as long as you could work them correctly you'd get two or three a day yes to help take the edge off the absolute longest lines give you a couple breezes and then you spent all of the time in between that waiting in lines yeah yeah no it's everything of course is being done because the the the like business people are just trying to figure out the right configuration to steal as much money out of everybody and all it's doing it's like it's meant to confuse and steal i guess it's meant to confuse and like vacuum money out of your pocket.

Yes. And it's continuing. There was talk of, oh, maybe the reservations will go away. And Florida, to some degree, they've gone away. Disneyland still has the reservations for just even getting in the park. To attend, yeah. And now, of course, there's a $400 tier of Fast Pass. That just gets you on every ride which honestly in some

ways that is a better in some it's better in some ways because like it's a lot of money it's too much money to spend if you're already spending money but then it's just like you don't have to look at your phone all yes exactly like you're paying for the freedom of of not having to think so hard about this right but like if you buy just regular lightning lane and you're surfing your phone all day which is what i do i feel like i'm in like mission impossible i feel like i'm simon pegg i'm benji in mission impossible i'm on my phone i'm doing it the whole day and i'm i get dopamine hits from it but then everybody else gets to enjoy it so you just i justify my disengaging from the group disney does have the entity working against

you the disney villain from the last movie i know the entity i know we all know the entity the very very understandable villain of mission impossible seven part one it was like part one but now it's gonna be called part one it's gonna be called it's just gonna erase that it's gonna be retroactively good uh yes but the end but disney's entity is shitty too though bottom of the ocean it's a nuclear submarine at the bottom but it's also video art at a weird european party it was a club it is a club as well yeah the entity is a club which i like that part a lot they're the greatest movies on the planet earth they're my favorite movies. Just to address a couple of things that have come up.

Jess, you'll be happy to know that today, Lightning Lane for Rise of Resistance is actually $27. Good, good, good. The other thing is that, first off, I've had this app open for about maybe like 45 minutes, and I think it's already taken my phone from 90% to 74%. Yep. And what was the other thing I was going to say?

Oh, the reservations. So the park reservations. There is a button in the app. It's buried in a spot, and it says park reservations, and when you click on it, it opens a browser window. You can't just build that into the app. Jason, this is one of the things that I am upset with this thing every day. You don't have, it takes you to like GoDisney.com,

which is a thing we've threatened to do an episode about forever, is that Disney bought Go.com like 20 plus years ago and all of its infrastructure is built on go.com some bizarre thing some useless michael was my isn't a purchase right it was an eisner purchases and the other day one of his rare l's i went flawless except for go disney and then mickey's kitchen i went to go.com and it's just a rich text website to links to all the different disney departments yeah and that's amazing and then disney also if you want to use a gift card you have to go to gift like disney gift card.com plug in and then plug that into your app i mean just the way that they don't talk is like like this past summer when I played captain for my sister and her three kids,

she got those tickets through a family friend connection who has a Club 33 membership. Uh-huh. So he gifted us tickets, okay? Mm-hmm. I had to. There was no way for me, a human, to take that reservation and import it to an app oh right right right i had to which meant like if i didn't know any better i would have just shown up that day with these tickets and then not been able to access anything like yeah i think you can do it retcon once you're

in the park but it meant i couldn't make any reservations like yeah you i had to get them to merge like merge this with i don't know i had to talk to a human like a human had to do it for me yeah and they were like can you give me the receipt for this purchase i was like they're club 33 gift tickets and they're like okay let me like backdoor this time one and like you know had to create a fake reservation something for me to even be able to use the app because those things don't talk well to each other. I've had difficulties before where it's like if I bought a ticket, you know, like me and I bought me and my husband's tickets and then my brother bought his family's. But actually, I want to run the app all day. Merging the reservations is not as intuitive as you think like i had to eventually scan their physical tickets to put it all in one app interface so that you can because

you're not just going to get lightning lane for two of you want to get it for the whole party you know what i mean yes yeah and i've had like tons of like running into weird corners there where it ends up taking you to a uh your safari browser it's like not within the app and you're like this should all be in the app if you're making me use the app it should all be in the app yeah yeah i had to update for an annual pass monthly payment i had to update my credit card which you have to do by calling there's not just a way to upload it like or to change it on the internet like it's crazy. If Ethan Hunt was up against the Entity, but the Entity was dumb and bad and shitty, and it would just fuck up once in a while, and it was built on 30-year-old software.

Well, the day that I went this past summer was the day that they switched from Genie Plus to calling it all Light and Light. Oh, yeah, yeah. But it was still like that meant it made some of the reservations in lead-up kind of confusing, because you'd be like, well, my genie's telling me to do this. And they're like, just so you know, genie won't be here tomorrow. Or like genie will still be here. But like, it's not called genie plus anymore. Like, yeah.

But the tip board, I find to be like such a patronizing interface. Like the tip board is so. Oh, yeah. Because they were plugging the idea that, oh, my God, Genie Plus you'll pay for. But Genie Regular will tell you what to do. Yes. He'll give you all kinds of tips, which will be like, have you thought about getting a balloon? Like, it's so stupid.

Or they're like, are you aware of a topia? And you're like, yeah, I'm aware of a topia. Like, if everything else is broken, I'll ride a topia. Yeah. It was acting like the AI would just direct you to things like things with no line and like it would like glide you across your day or but it's like everybody i don't know and maybe they don't but i'm like everybody has this base level of information don't they most people most people do by this point like the genie plus the tip board and then it wouldn't be where your things were you'd have to click on the other you know what i mean like yeah the tip board

versus like your itinerary would not be like they wouldn't be talking to each other so wouldn't be like why don't you recommend for me a snack after big thunder knowing i'm gonna be on big thunder about 2 30 why don't you be like hey you know you can just get fries right here at this walk like you know what i mean like the tip board wasn't actually tipping me anything good no it would be like check out this ride or this or this parade or this show and it's like i already did those things i just didn't tell you i did those right exactly or you could tell me like trivia or you can tell me like interesting things to do in line or you could tell me a lot of things that would enrich my experience but what you don't need to tell me is like have you thought about booking a princess encounter i'm like no i haven't and i don't want to i'm already here the best is when they would direct you to like ready-made

apple music or spotify playlist and it's like i can search that and when i'm home i'm here now exactly exactly or like it didn't ever if you really wanted to like do my tip board you should know that i have a park hopper and you should be telling me hey now's a great time crowd wise to switch parks save things you like to come back later to this park why not make it a sandwich type day you know like yeah yeah stuff stuff like that although i know that was restrict for a while where you had to only switch there's still kind of a thing like at 11 a.m.

is when you're allowed to switch you can't switch you get arrested but you can switch back right yes you can yeah

can I just mention because you said the phrase and you haven't I don't think you've said the phrase and since we did a Country Bear Jamboree you said

you just said I'm here now which was your famous song oh he did say I'm here now when we did the Country Bear Jamboree so if anyone thought

I was not being sincere on the Country Bear on the actual Jamboree yeah and if you and that lore we need to we need to maintain that

yeah we do yes we do that's lore yeah this has been kind of lore free so far as far as the right is concerned that's our version

of the Disneyland app it's like okay so this is lore for an episode of another podcast yes that we made an appearance on. Yes. It was kind of tangentially related to Our Country Bear Jamboree. Pretty good episode. It was very fun.

It was a blast to do. I laugh at that song you did. Every six months I listen to it. Okay, because here's what i bring to the table for musical improv that a lot of people don't bring and that is uh panic oh everybody brings that oh yeah yeah yeah that's the eternal flame it read as a character but you were the most were like i don't know if i can do this and then yours was like the most harried like but that energy was uh very good it was thematically correct yeah for the

country bear i feel like there are just seven prompts to what you're describing with genie plus where they would just like rotate them it was yeah sorry there's probably a dog here on that or something that's all right um but yeah so do you want to go like go i don't want because there's some stuff in the app i'll say i like. Sure. Like, you know. Yeah. I mean, we could go through. Like, if you just go on the app. Listeners, if you have the app, open it up, I suppose.

Because we'll go through it. Because I don't want it to be. Because this could easily descend into just making fun of the app. And like, you know, I want to both sides the app. Oh, I don't have. I need the upgrade. How long do you think that'll take me? I don't know. It's probably on the network, whatever your network is.

But I mean, you can see my phone. It's not like we have to be. But yeah, they give you like, the first thing you see when you open up the app is that they're trying to sell you the lightning lanes. Right. It's either the $36 one, which is the multi-pass or just the premiere which is the 400 upcharge which uh my girlfriend thought yes it's 400 on top she thought it was all included i was like no no that's 400 per person per person not per party yes right so it's 400 per person that

i said that word right you said inconscionable you probably meant unconscionable yeah it's that it's yeah it's so yeah four hundred dollars for today in the next few days uh it's a person yeah yeah that's so horrific so depending on how many people you have it might make more sense to get like a guide which is still i forget how much that is and that's very expensive but it might make more sense i forget um but yeah that's that's if you don that is, and that's very expensive, but it might make more sense, I forget. But yeah, that's if you don't want to work. That's the no effort choice. And it depends, because like, is the effort on a 12-hour Disney day when you're taking a friend from out of town

and you want to give them the best day, how much actual physical labor and effort am I putting in? How much is my time worth? Is it $200? Is it $300? Like, I don't know. It's hard to tell. Yeah, I i mean it really comes down to group size because that if it's just you and your friend that's still eight hundred dollars yes like so that's i mean i'm never gonna do that unless i like win the lottery i don't think i'm ever gonna do that okay so today's plans the icon next to it is still a genie so yeah they really ran the character genie through the mud for this

thing because we talked about this we did an episode a couple of years ago. And we were talking about how like, why are you tying a beloved character to this failed part of your app? Yeah. It's also like, he's free. Right. He's free. And now you're basically putting him back. Back in the lamp.

You're putting him back in the lamp. And that's not right. No, it wasn't right. And now I guess he's free again, or he's dead. I'm not sure. Hey, pretty easy going day right now at the old D-Land. I'm seeing some short lines. Now, that's the thing I like.

I like opening up the app and seeing what the waits are and imagining I'm there enjoying a light line. Yes. Obviously, the map and wait wait time that part's great yes like um that's easy i cannot believe it's four dollars a person that is so nuts um show times okay virtual queue i've not been able to successfully get in a virtual queue really i always was just fast passing or paying for or i guess lightning lane they're not nothing is called a fast pass anymore right there's no fast pass anymore it depends virtual queue right now is easy to get for haunted mansion holiday which you still have to

get a virtual queue you cannot join a regular line because the queue is still under construction and the gift shop is under construction but that's pretty easy to get they i finally got on a tiana preview because i have the magic key but that took four different try four different day tries what do you think uh i haven't said oh uh are we saving uh uh i like it okay i'll say that i say i like it but all the the early tea was not enough drama to the story well i will give a little hint of my feelings is that if I have one complaint is there's not a, there's not, there's no tension. Yeah. In the spot where you go up.

Let's have a, that's, that's what I heard. Yeah. There's not like a, that moment used to be terrible. You know, like bunny is tied up. Like this is very scary. This is like, and you know, those, tied up like this is very scary this is like and you know those those vultures yes and the the tension under the click going up very scary and you know what we're saying it we're not giving our kids enough scares i i said this last week this is a common thing because like snow white scary adventure which i they changed to snow white's enchant whatever enchanted wish i don't know what's called i like the new version

of the ride the dark ride but they did take away a lot of the scare stuff so i do feel like we gotta scare these kids these kids should be scared a little more even though i was afraid of everything as a kid but look at the man i am now yeah what it made me oh i wrote thunder i wrote um uh matterhorn till i was like 12 with my eyes closed because the Yeti scared me. But I still rode it. Right. You know, it didn't keep me off the ride. And I didn't look into his eyes on Indiana Jones till I was like 21.

Mara's eyes? Look into my eyes. It is your destiny. You had a blue moon before you looked into the eyes. I just put my eyes down. I just say, I'm not looking in that guy. Do you still look into Mara's eyes now? No, I do.

Or is there part of you that still is a little weird about it? No, I look into his eyes. Yeah. I know it's just for play. Now I know. But you have to play. But sometimes it's fun to play along. Yeah.

You know what I'm saying? Sometimes it's fun. Jason, do you look into Mara's eyes? Sometimes. But not always? Sometimes I'll just look at the other doors. And then I get to look into the eyes, but not be scared. Big Mara, not the little Maras. It's the Maras above the door.

No, it's the big Mara. That you get in trouble. No, big Mara. No, big Mara already, Indy is already out, isn't he? No, that's after Mara. Okay. Oh my God, Jason. I thought it was over the door you're not

supposed to look no it's inside don't look into mara's eyes inside am i crazy it's right before you go through the doors it's right at the beginning yeah it's the big head yeah yeah he's saying those you know there's three doors yeah and they used to rotate yeah which was cool but it was to say it's the same track obviously but then when you go in and see the giant mara that's why it's hard to not look at Mara yeah I would just look down so you always thought it was the little Mara eyes I thought it was the little Mara eyes because you're seeing the different

you know what we gotta do now? Indiana Jones episode 2 and we gotta do it soon because apparently there's been a miscommunication here about what it is so we have to do a second episode I'm calling it a shot now let me just say Haunted Mansion Holiday no more virtual queues left no more now i'm calling it i'm calling a shot now well let me just say uh haunted mansion holiday

no more virtual queues left no more stand no standby line no lightning lanes available it's what's so it's four o'clock so i guess so but you can comfortably the thing is you virtual queue you have to get up at like 7 a.m and do it in disneyland which is just sucks yeah okay so you can do virtual queue before you get there. Okay. You have to be on property. So right now, again, Scott is getting a piercing headache just from us talking about

it far away. He's like clutching his body. Because he has so many thoughts or he doesn't want to talk about it? Because he doesn't want to talk about it. He doesn't want to talk about it. He gets physically ill when we start going. Because it's too stressful? Yes. He hates any of this he i've seen him get i was working on figuring out a problem with the app i saw he physically got up and walked away he's so like app averse and talking about all this he doesn't like any of it

so i'm just imagining now he knows that what we're doing to his podcast right now is talking about this and he's having a physical reaction we're uh so so virtual queue generally speaking 7 a.m you get up and you get that one if you're not in the park and then there generally will be a noon chance as well right and sometimes even a further three or four i remember this when rise was for like when you could first go back, COVID had to be a California resident. They had the like at 7 a.m. you have a chance and at noon you have a chance to get in a virtual queue for Rise or Web Slinger. Yes. Web Slinger.

Not good. Disappointing. Disappointing. Disappointing. Disappointing. When you want to. Okay. I've said it a hundred times.

If you want to make a ride based on Spider-Man, well, what's the thing you want to do as Spider-Man? Fly. Fly. Oh, fly. Fly. You want to get broken up with on the ride or something. You want to disappoint him.

I want to have the moment where I go, oh, no, my scientific mentor is the villain. Yeah, right. You want a revelation of some kind. But way down the list is shoot your webs like bullets and it's just not good it doesn't work and it's hard it does it's too hard uh yeah the spider-man ride in islands of adventure way better the best jason's favorite right of all time it's really good yeah yeah still really good i hope it lasts because it's gone now in japan so there's

one more left and i don't know we'll see a rise of the resistance type spider-man i mean obviously rise is a massive footprint but like the movement is yeah is like the spider-man islands of adventure ride leveled up where you're in a thing. Now, I don't really like a 3D component, but it works pretty good. And you're moving around. It's almost like a similar movement feel to Rise, right? Well, yeah.

It's just that that ride system, like Spider-Man and Transformers, and the way I put it is that that ride system fucks you up more, which I like. I feel like Rise of Resistance, I have a few complaints about it. And one of them is that it doesn't feel like you're getting jostled enough oh because it's so smooth it is smooth but the drops yeah the drop stuff is cool i just mean like when you're getting shot and drop to give the sensation of of flight and swing i think would be awesome yeah um yeah they man i

think rise is maybe perfect i don't know i i've said it on the show before but there's a couple i have a couple problems we don't need to relitigate it i just yeah in general it's just i wish the ride vehicle like messed you up because my body doesn't feel like it's under attack like it does on indiana jones or transformers i still get it from the stop starts like when you're going in between the cannons stop start stop start that's the best yeah it's my favorite room but those don't work anymore what do you're going in between the cannons, stop starts, stop starts. Well, that's the best. Yeah, it's my favorite one, but those don't work anymore. What do you mean? They're stuck.

The cannons don't work. They're stuck. It doesn't, they're not moving. Because they're so big. I think both coasts, the cannons have stopped working. They're so strong. They're so heavy and they move. They did move with such force.

Apparently they shook the foundation when they were a little off once. I don't that it's never coming back but i've seen people say it's never coming back to working i don't know well hopefully that's wrong but we'll see but those don't work that is my favorite room because that feels like a crazy thing yeah yeah um it was very startling the first time the drop is great at the end you mean when you yeah yeah that's a fun yeah yeah it locks into a different ride system. I just, it's so smooth. That Wi-Fi controlled thing is so smooth. I just like, Indiana Jones, you come out of it and you go like, ah, my neck is messed up.

But I want that. I want my neck to be messed up. See, I don't want my neck to be messed up. No, I love Indy. Indy, I love. But like all of the, there's basically half of Universal I can't ride. Okay. Like it just is too, makes me too sick, you know?

Because so much stuff is 3D. Yes. Yeah. But like, yeah. I had the, talking about Rise of the Resistance, I had the like, go, go, you haven't done it. My dad and brother came out to visit last fall. And we were down in Disney World end of 2021, and any time we tried to do Rise, it was down.

Yes. And I had done it out here right opening day, and I felt so bad for them because it was like, I mean, it was chaotic down there in 2021, so it was like i mean it was chaotic down there in 2021 so it was like uh you know under a little more understandable but i'm like you have to get on this yeah this is amazing you had to get on this for you're out here now yeah it should be working a little better yeah so i i I took two friends around last April, and I really fucked them up at the beginning of the day

in a way that they basically couldn't recover, which was that I was like, we can get into Oga's Cantina. It's the only place you can get alcohol on the Disneyland side. We did this right as we entered the park at 8 a.m. And I was like, let's get a fun,

blue, funky cocktail. Super fun. I love the cantina. I have a great time every time I go there. And then I took them on Smuggler's Run. Oh. And they basically didn't function.

You know, the like combination of two alcoholic drinks on like near empty stomachs early in the morning and a very like herky jerky yeah hard to track visually right ride uh so the day was ruined in some ways in many ways yeah and this goes to the like pressure of being the leader at we still had a great day i like didn't push anybody to go any faster than they needed to I was like I've been here a million times like there's nothing that I need to do if you don't want to go at this pace we can let's go like

walk around and do something different you know mix it up but at the end of the day like one of them made like a completely innocuous comment and I like completely snapped at them because I was like I was like you have no idea the pressure I've been under all day actually I can tell you exactly what i said i said oh man i just feel like at this point you understand why getting a hotel would be fun because i would just love

to get some honk shoes right now oh yeah what do you think i mean when i say that that's some some a little nap a little sleep thank you yeah thank you they were like some honk shoes i was like yeah yeah some z's some sleep that's what it honk shoe it's a cartoon way to describe alluding to yes like they're not imagining sawing wood they're imagining snoozing exactly and then i laughed good naturally i was like oh i guess that's not as you cut as I, and my one friend said, yeah, she's explaining it like, we're the dumb ones. And I was like, the implication there is that I'm dumb, and I have just navigated an entire day for you.

So actually what I did is I went quiet for like 20 minutes, and then the drive, I was like, I have to be honest. That really hurt my feelings. I have to speak truthfully to you, my two college friends in our late 30s right now i didn't appreciate that after a day of navigating your day through the park and part of me blames the freaking app like it blames the like the pressure to navigate and optimize every moment yeah means like even when people are grateful you're gonna feel like i can tell you who had

the least fun today it was me like the mom who doesn't get to eat a hot meal in 20 years you know right that's how i feel at disneyland because of the damn app it the app heightens the like uh right before like happy hour like the 3 p.m to 5 p.m like drag where like everyone's trying to eat or take a rest or like get on a ride and they're trying to push through if they're not resting and it makes me also like i've always been like a land disney land lover because of growing up in california and i haven't ever done like a big proper world trip like my brother and sister-in-law have. And I was like, you know, this also is putting into sharp relief the difference between being people who vacation at Disney versus people who visit Disney in their regular life.

Right. Because if you're vacationing there and you're going to do multiple parks each day, you maybe aren't, you maybe don't need to pedal to the metal each of the parks each day, especially depending on like the age of your kids. Yeah. You could be like, we are gonna go back to the hotel and take a nap.

Yes. We literally can do that and it can be part of our design. If you're visiting as a day tripper, you're like, you have to suck every moment. Yeah. And the more money you spend,

the more you feel like you have to do that yes and it's but like you said when it hits it hits well that's the thing when you pull it off you go thank god the app is here because i could fix this for us while we all stand in line while we were all having a little break to have a churro i can get ahead of this and that's the evil the best part of the day with my nephews and niece was when we saw a bunch of ducklings right well that's always yeah the stuff weird little stuff is usually what's the best that being said though in disney world and i said this i think i'm sure on the podcast when i pulled a frozen fast pass a couple like whenever we were

there a year ago that it goes those go fast so you gotta be checking checking checking checking and it took me an hour i was on it for an hour and i pulled it and i may as well have gotten this pulp fiction adrenaline shot in my heart like oh my like i was so excited and i got it and then i was the hero of the day and that's the evil of the app yeah because you do get addicted a little bit to the the thrill of the chase the artificial scarcity well i mean i guess it's artificial in some ways but yes you do yes there's there's that's the thing that keeps you coming back to the app unfortunately because i wish i could just say no don't worry about like obviously if we're taking a two year old,

we're not doing, we're not going hard. We're not doing, we're waiting to see poo and Tigger. Like that's the thrill. So that's fine. But if a person comes in from out of town, we're doing it.

And I'm both like, oh man, I'm going to be on my phone the whole time. But then I'm like, I'm going to be on my phone the whole time. I'm going to do a little, yeah. Yes.

No, I, I, listen, I agree. And I've been that person for countless groups for years. Right. Do you think, and I'm not, this isn't a challenge. Do how I feel like I would, I could challenge somebody with my abilities. If we had a contest at Disneyland to see who could get the best, optimize the app the most. And you don't have to take me up on this, but we've talked about this before

where I wanted to, when we thought Genie would actually be an AI that told you what to do, I was ready to compete against it. Man versus machine. But it's nothing. So whatever. Well, and I thought when it was first announced,

they were essentially going to give people some access to their crowd monitoring software. Like not the whole thing, but it would be smart enough to tell you like, oh, this land's really bad. Maybe try this land. Sure. And that's not really what it was. But I do wonder like what percentile am I in? This feels like a sport to do that. And that's not really what it was. Yeah. But I do wonder like, what percentile am I in? This feels like a sport to me now.

I feel like you're, well, I mean, there's so many blogs and like things and people who are really good at it. I'm sure you're still in like the top 5%. Thank you for saying that.

God bless you for saying that. Easy. Cause like, I feel like I have, once I'm there, I feel like I can intuit it because I also have, I have some like um internal metronomes

of where i think crowds are going where i think a parade or a lull or the little kids need a break now's the time or right hey this time is going to be hard save a big ride for your last ride of the day if you really didn't get it all that like stuff that's just internal right clock stuff i feel like i do that and then the app adds to it right where it gives me access to you more more lightning lanes where i'm not sprinting around the park anymore um but i don't feel like like i didn't know the virtual queue thing because like when i tried it when it was covid rules i remember being really rigid about it and then like striking out and being able to do the noon one. Like not getting the early one.

Right. Being able to do the noon one. And then we got on Rise and it broke. Right. And then we got tickets to come back to go on Rise later in the day. Right. So I would still put myself only maybe in the top 15%. I'll say this.

Or maybe 10%. I don't often meet somebody who seems to have a very similar feeling to me about it. It's not a common thing where I run into somebody who hates and loves the app as well because they feel so important. Not important, but feel like I have to be in charge. I have to take control of the day.

Could we have a podcast about Invitational where we invite anybody who wants to see if they whoever gets the most rides during the day off of the lightning lane whatever the 32 one wins or something like was there there's got to be a way to structure that and then like have people far and wide across the land anyone who thinks they can uh compete against me i love it challenge me and i'll and i will say i will beat you i will the best thing would be also to go when it's like

terrible yes you have to go on a summer day you have to go during spring break you have to go like you know you christmas day yeah you have to go a really really like intense actually better intense day yeah whatever the worst day of the year is like super bowl sunday is kind of bad usually now because people don't watch super bowl they they go to Disneyland. Because I feel like that's where I appreciate the app is like, you know, that's just the time of year that my sister and her family can come visit is the summer. And I'm like, when we were growing up, we would never go in the summer. You know, that's when the out of town rubes go. We're going on like a Tuesday in March when it's drizzling.

And so that is where I really do appreciate the app because I remember going one like lead up to Christmas time and it was like you couldn't walk and then you're like man it really is hard to have fun like you could try to have a good attitude and keep your expectations managed but like when you really can't even navigate basic spaces because it's so crowded it's very very hard and so to be able to throw a little money at the problem if you're really if you're with family or friends who really it is a scarcity thing they're only going to go once every couple of years then you're like okay i can throw money at this problem and try to like make a better day where whereas i'd be facing a really horrible day otherwise you know like i'd be facing the toughest insurmountable crowds yes yes i mean that makes

yeah so much sense because yeah obviously if somebody's i can only travel on this day so we have to go that day right so we have to do it and that always i again i feel like i would get a little more excited being like oh it's gonna be bad yeah let's see what we can do let's see what we can squeeze out of this tough it felt like because yeah a lot of people are like oh we got to go my mom especially looks like, oh, is it going to be crowded? And I'm like,

it doesn't matter. Like I get, I get really cocky, I guess when we start talking about this, but yeah, cause I, cause it's given me a sense, finally given me a sense of control in my life in a lot of ways,

I guess. Because you know, you can provide at least a certain minimum of a day now. You can get like, hey hey we might not get on everything we might have to wait in a couple long lines a couple of the lunches like might be you know your experience walking around main street at certain times might be a little more crowded than you thought but basically i can give you a good day still which is different did you know you said this earlier did you know you can like drink at a couple different places around new

orleans square now at disneyland no because i didn't realize you can drink a beer where was i would you tell me you weren't with me but i texted you the one right uh the terrace uh is it river bell terrace real terrace i had like a little vegetable thing with some like tomato sauce on and i have big beer and i'm watching the mark twain go around and i went well this is interesting interesting yeah because it for the longest time was only club 33 yes and then ogus cantina yeah yeah i mean which is hilarious because on california adventure you can get alcohol every foot it's so funny well right and you could go everywhere you walk everywhere it's just like here's more alcohol for you right because well that's why it doesn't make any sense i honestly if they were like you

know what it's all dry we don't want to that evil alcohol shouldn't be here i go fine that's your totally sure but i can walk 100 feet yeah and drink as much as i want yeah california adventure is so i i hesitate to i don't want to like uh i am going to disneyland and i am going in a group with a guide for the first time oh yeah i've done've done this once. And I am a little bit like, is this going to break me forever? Now, obviously it won't because I have my own nostalgia, my own love,

my own dedication to the park. But I'm about to experience absolutely no resistance to a day. Like no lines. Everything is like, I won't be in charge, which will be like incredible. But it's only for a few hours, you know? So it's like, I think we get the charge, which will be like incredible, but it's only

for a few hours, you know? So it's like, I think we get the guide for like three or four hours maybe. And then I'm like, literally what happens after that? Will we have tickets? Will we even use the app? Because like we wouldn't have used the app prior. Like, should I start getting lightning lanes for the five or six o'clock hour because we're not gonna have a guide anymore you know what i mean maybe yeah i mean you know like

what's the math on that or i think that the group that i'm with won't care we will have written everything under the sun they might also give you a few complimentary for when the guide's done that's probably what will happen. That would be choice. Because it's also kind of big. It's like eight or nine people, which is like, that's my other question is, has the app made you more or less strict about group size? As far as inviting people along? I mean, obviously you take what you take when it's like your family or friends who want

to go. Yeah. Like I've always been like, oh, four to six is like. four to six is like ideal ideal i mean two is a fucking blast but like two is nice yeah but four to six you're still you're having fun it's reasonable to navigate yeah i mean a big group obviously is a heart is harder uh i've never put any restrictions on it because like again i when we bring the two-year-old or two-year-old it's not like we do this so it's not i haven't yet tried to do the whole family optimization day. I haven't done that yet.

Because that's, like, imagine the scarcity then. Like, you really are going to get 10 fast passes, lightning lanes, all at once. You know what I mean? Yeah, where you have to keep checking. And it's harder because, of course, when they run out, you still can get them. But there's a worse chance of getting seven versus two. Right. Yeah.

So that's the difference. I think even numbers are the thing that I'm like, oh, two or four, it's going to be easier than three. We had a group when we were going, when I went in the summer, it was a party of five. But my youngest nephew was at the time four and a half and so there was a couple dining reservations where i just like tried to make them for a party of four and be like you're gonna you're gonna turn us away with this little kid and then they wouldn't because they were like yeah it's just like one more little kid right right yeah it's not like you showed up with four

other adults exactly like oopsie but it's crazy if i went on the reservations before like trying for dining reservations the amount of things that were open for parties of four and not for five dolls exactly like oopsie but it's crazy if i went on the reservations before like trying for dining reservations the amount of things that were open for parties of four and not for five and you're like man that's one more seat that's so great that's a little that's a little sneak i do yeah is that you if you go i can't get a reservation five but i can get one for four and then you just do like a little like can i add a child to this yeah yeah i well for years that was my a thing i loved was like you would just call a phone number and you talk to a human yeah and they'd be like okay well it's a little full for lunch

you mind eating at like uh late lunch three or four and like no that's no problem yeah okay great and now it's just in the like it's near impossible to get, like, a Blue Bayou reservation. Right. Mm-hmm. But you can still go and ask. Yes. Like, Mitch went and asked once. Scott and the Doughboys. Yes.

Yeah, Mitch Magic. The Mitch Magic. He showed up and just asked politely. Mitch just showed up and asked politely. And it worked for Mitch. I've just been to Specsavers and upgraded my lenses to extra thin and light with 50% off. Now, what else can I upgrade? My cat?

Wow. My scooter? Oh, yeah. Get 50% off lens upgrades in the Specsavers Spring Sale. Hey, I can upgrade my kids. You chill, Mom. I'll load the dishwasher. Awesome. Exclusions apply. See Specsavers.ca for details.

Offer ends soon. The ultimate hack that I used to be able to pull back in my day. I'm excited about this. So when I was in middle school, I had an annual pass. But you would also, you could, this is back when fast passes were done by barcode on your physical ticket. Yeah. And so you could, when you were just checking into the park you could be like oh can i have a physical ticket because i like it right they would give you a

physical ticket and i did this a couple times with just a one other friend so we're a party of two and that meant we had double fast pass abilities because we each had noise that jason just made two barcodes yeah so we could be like use our annual pass barcode for space mountain right it gives you the window when your next one's available use your other ticket and no one cared about two 13 year old girls pulling this did you feel were you scared doing it or were you just like elated because i would be both elated and scared i think i think i was scared one time we tried to like really overreach and be like i bet we could also additionally go up to lines and be like i have a fast pass but she dropped hers yes you can yeah yeah and that felt a little more like bald face lying in a way that felt a little

worse so we only tried that once because the guy was like okay but that's something that they can avoid now with everything being on an app you know you used to really be able to be like yeah you wanted me to keep track all these little papers oh it's one of these little papers i'm sorry and they'd be like you're right like it's kind of a lot to keep track of all these little papers right yeah and if you're 13 and you just make it look like you're about to burst into tears no No cast member wants to deal with that. Because what's it matter? One more person in the Fast Pass? Whatever.

It doesn't matter. They created the name Fast... I mean, I assume Michael Eisner. It came to him in a dream, like everything else, everything good that he made. And then they got rid of this IP. That's their IP and they're not using it. We all just want to call it Fast pass let's pitch a tv show called fast pass i would love there's there's so much disney parks ip they haven't pitched i think did zach and i tell you this that we tried in just

like a general meeting with disney to be like we love disneyland anything that yes and they won't tell you what's in development they're like if you can guess it we can confirm or deny we're like can we have a list of um rides that aren't currently being developed and they were like no and we were like okay big thunder mountain and they're like already being developed we were like tiki room they're like already being developed we're like matterhorn they're like already being developed and we're like we but it can't go the other way you can't tell us what's right open they're like no well if if memory serves me correct I was a week away from going on a zoom with you and Zach about Country Bears and they canceled it yes for like they were like never mind wait never mind

like they discovered someone working at it in a closet somewhere probably yes yeah yeah it was like oh yeah never mind this just happened where I, yes. Yeah. And it was like, oh yeah, never mind. This just happened where I asked about rights for a movie. I was like, who has these rights? It's a 20th century Fox movie that is now also Disney, because they published or whatever. And it was funny. People we know have the rights.

Which is always like a funny situation. I'd be like, I wonder if they still care about this. And like, should I just email them and be wonder if they still care about this and like should i just email them and be like you still care about this yeah which i might but yeah it's worth a shot amount of stuff though that they were i've said this i've said this recently too the amount of stuff where it's like oh this is in development and you never hear about it is like how much money have they spent on every single property to not make it so much so much money so also i think that they i don't know that there is

matterhorn anymore but expedition everest which might be oh really is is in development and that might be wow really too similar you know like you think it would be yeah so it might be like that that one out hey this just remind me i have not yet been on the Mickey train. Runaway Railway? Yeah. And I hear great things. I'm a big fan. It's great. I'm excited.

I'm a big fan of it. It's rare that I have something new at the park. Yes. And the queue is amazing too. There's artifacts from cartoons that are now in real life, of course. And there's one from Lonesome Ghosts, which is my favorite. It's a great one. I saw this thing. I don't know if I my favorite. And then I saw this thing.

I don't know if I'm spoiling it. Like I saw this thing from the cartoon and I was like, I got so excited. I have basically not even ventured into that section since Toontown. Do you guys remember when Toontown, well, I don't know.

I didn't go when it first, I never went to Toontown until I was in my early 20s. Okay. Same. We're Disney World boys. Right, well, I don't know. I didn't go when I was, I never went to Disney until I was in my early 20s. Okay. Same. Okay. We're Disney World boys. Right, right, right, right, right.

So when Toontown first opened and you could wait in like a mammoth line to go through Mickey's house and it was like crazy. And Goofy's house was just a bounce house, which was pretty fun. Yeah, yeah. And then they had this thing i absolutely loved which was just like a topiary garden but the topiaries were bouncy oh that's cool and they

got rid of it but that was like one of the only things it would be like oh if you have a bunch of little kids toontown is fun and there were like a couple good restaurants and there would be like hey go have lunch and your little kids can run around things that are actually more like a playground that'll give them a break from like being cooped up waiting in lines yeah yeah um there is less and i guess there's still some stuff like that there's one in california adventure that's like well grizzly challenge trail yeah yes and i these are two oh we are big fans of the challenge trail just before i had a child but now especially having a two-year-old wants to run around yeah i'm in toontown a lot now.

Yeah. I mean, it's good. We need these, we need these third spaces. We need. It's not just about work and more third spaces.

In Disney. At Disney. The back of Toontown now with fake grass and fake rocks is where we usually go and let my daughter run around

and pick up leaves and run them to grandpa. Great. And then as soon as like Pete shows up or Daisy, I pick her up, we go over there, and we meet the characters. Because that's a really easy spot to,

there's not a long line, because they just kind of pop in and out. It's a dead end. Yeah. People aren't venturing back there that much. Goofy just came out, and we walked up on his porch. And Goofy's like, come on, up here. And we were first in line.

That's great. And we hit four characters within 10 minutes. That's great. It was great. And I would say even Toontown, though, with the new changes they've made to it, it's more, obviously, there's a big ride you want to go on now. But I feel like there's enough for parents and children now.

Whereas if I didn't have a kid, I would be going back there a lot more. Because before that, Roger Rabbit once in a while. But that's not your prime hanging out. No, no, no. And i'm really not it's it's also the dead endness of it like i'm basically not even venturing to that section of the park unless i'm going on holiday small world yeah like i'm not even going past matterhorn yes on that depth of plane right you know i'm cutting it off like right there that used to be me you know 35 minute wait for runaway we're all away it's not too bad it's not that bad yes and they play little music versions of like um eye to eye from goofy movie oh baby there's a lot of good parody posters

in the queue yeah it's easily one of the best rides i'm excited i'm excited it's you don't you don't get a new one that often yeah yes not often yes um so yeah go back especially with a kid um but can we sorry no i just had a quick memory of going this summer where we my littlest nephew who is now five but was like you know not five yet but he's very tall for his age and he so he can go on almost everything but he's scared because he's a little guy but we were like let's just take him anyway and maybe it'll be okay because you never know that's how i got treated because i was the youngest of not only like my immediate family but also like the cousins we would go with they would just kind of be like you have to go because like no one wants to wait with you and yeah like that's the way of it as soon as you're tall enough you have to go on it you have i never got to like

sit out for being scared ever and so it's very much like i don't know maybe you'll like it once you're on it maybe you like it once you're on it and they would not um they made us take him off because he was sobbing oh no where on which ride again on guardians which maybe he would have been too scared but yeah but he was okay before it started yes yes yes yes yes no no no he was okay in the queue and his brother was like i'm gonna be so proud of you buddy and he was like okay and he thought rocket was cute so we're like he might be okay he had done a lot better on rides than when he'd got like a year before he was scared of yeah just at universal he was scared of life of pets but he had done so much better it wasn't like first ride of the day i was like i don't know it's kind of a toss-up because like also guardians it's shocking but

it's funny and it's not that long scary but they wouldn't let us uh keep them on they won't let you um make make kids go i've seen parents make kids go on it though i've seen parents make kids go on it, though. I've seen it a couple times. But the cast members were like, he can't go on it. I wonder if it's because it's been too many times. Yeah, maybe so. We were just sort of like, I think he'll be,

there's at least a fight, knowing him and his personality, there's a fighting chance that he loves this. Sure. This is like a coin toss for how he's behaved on the rides so far today. Where he gets scared in the queue and then he's like, that was really fun. Right. And he's five? Now he's behaved on the rides so far today where he's like get scared in the queue and then he's like that was really fun right and he's five now he's five yeah i have a kind of two

year old who is three inches away from being able to go on space mountain big thunder she's in like 95 95th percentile of height it's really it's wild it's really tricky because you're like i don't know you can go go. She can go. Like last year, a year and a half ago, I took him on, we put him on Smuggler's Run and he was like horrified and I was like,

I'm sorry. I forget that he's like littler because he's so tall for his age that I'm like, I don't know if you can go on it. You can go on it. That one's confusing too because it's kind of a video game.

Yeah. And kids like video games. Yeah, but he didn't like, you're in an isolated seat oh yeah because no one's next to you I think that's the scariest part

because like I remember being scared but my mom would hold on to me and I was like okay my fear is not deep right it is like

it's right in the fun zone of like it's a thrill ride you know it would get me a little flashlight I could point at my feet if I got scared of the dark that's nice

yeah that's very sweet I didn't know that oh i swear you probably did i i do you shine that at mara huh do you shine it at mara do you still have it oh no i well first off i was three years i was 1988 you don't keep that i do still have it somewhere at my mom's um but yeah i was terrified uh they took me on Pirates of the Caribbean. I screamed my head off purely because of the dark. And when we're in the gift shop, they're like, well, just get him a little key chain flashlight. And then they got me that.

We went on again. If I got scared, I would just shine at my feet and I was fine. That's brilliant. Yeah, that is smart. Forever. And for years, when I was fine. That's brilliant. Yeah, that is smart. Forever. And for years, like when I was like an adolescent, I would just ride Alien Encounter Florida over and over again. And that was a terrifying ride.

Did you use the flashlight on Alien Encounter? No, I just knew all the beats. I just knew everything that was coming. I like the idea of somebody ruining the experience by shining a flashlight in Alien Encounter. Because it would be so i yeah yeah i well now it's just ruined the ruining the experience when you go uh to sit down restaurants at disney and boomers are just shining their giant android phone to read the menu yeah yeah and it's like what do your parents do surely they figured it out you know yeah i don't know my daughter's just getting

scared of stuff she was not scared the first time we took her now she's starting to get scared of stuff so i don't think we're gonna force a two and a half year old on space mountain that would probably be too much no no guardians well i think she i think maybe she has to be like five inches away from guardian she loves, okay. She loves like getting thrown around though. She likes Mater's Junkyard Jamboree. Yeah. So like she likes that, but I think dark and loud is a problem.

Yeah. And you never know. Well, because I, you know, you can only like treat people how you were, how you'd like to be treated. Sure. And I have only positive memories of being forced on rides.

Uh-huh. Like my mom and my aunt and my cousins and my siblings were always right like the ride ended and i was like i'm so glad i did that that was so fun i never walked away from a ride being like i can't believe you made me go on that that was terrifying ever so i i've it's been i've had a couple tricky moments where i'm like oh i get to do the same thing i get to be like don't worry buddy be brave it's all fine you're gonna be safe mama and I are gonna hold you like I can do all the same things and they might not have the same experience because not everyone's the same kid and I've had

uh my other nephew Des freaked out on the radiator springs ride when I and I was like you're gonna love it man when this ride's over you're gonna love it he did not and I was like I don't know I don't know what to do about that I guess i violated your trust yeah you scarred them for life um when my girlfriend and i first started dating in 2019 um the jurassic world redo of jurassic park ride opened at universal yeah and we had gone to a press event for it and i was like oh we should go because she was working at universal at the time so i went to go see her she was doing the frog chorus in harry potter uh and we were just walking around the park and doing some stuff and i was like oh we should go to jurassic world it's awesome and she was still like we'd only been

dating a couple months and so she was trying to like doing the play it cool thing you do when you're friends and had not fully explained to me that she's terrified of things hanging above her and she's terrified of uh i believe it's robots in it's called submechanophobia and it's like animatronics and water submerged in water and that ride has both and so she was like freaking out the whole ride i'm like okay it's good it's not that good yeah what's going on and she's like no i was legitimately scared i was like oh okay yeah it's it's it's tricky with little kids when you want to get them to like try something new and be a little bit brave yeah when you're like trying to read between the lines you know

you're just like that's why we had warmed them up on lots of safer rides you're trying to gauge like yeah especially when you're not going that often you're like who knows the growth that's happening in a year and a half in your like ability to handle these rides. Even trigger with 29 year olds where you're like, are you fucking with me? What's going on? Yeah, I will. I guess I'm going to have to err on the side of caution going forward, sadly.

You know what? That's great. It's just like you always want to give like that tiny bit of push of like, are you nervous or are you scared? I mean, she can't say a full like complete sentence so i guess i should give her a little bit more time yes yes yes definitely don't be don't be like me and don't forget that height does not equal maturity i was shocked though because i was like oh looking at disneyland website you're like oh she can go on almost everything there's like seven

or eight things she can't go on oh and she can go on those and like when she's two and a half or three like that's wild yeah i was like oh she'll be like nine right when she can go on guardians yeah no not the case yeah dj can go on everything except for in credit coaster but that doesn't mean he should but that's like tough to remember because like i'm just going by like as soon as i was tall enough i went on everything right and i was a little tall for my age but not i guess i just forget he's really tall for his age you're just like completely swayed by sure you're like yeah it's confusing it's confusing doesn't make sense on the app there is something that says are you a disney parks trivia whiz oh which i was like oh that might be interesting to play so i said let

me just click playing i don't want to spoil the questions yet, but I hit play, and then it takes you to a different app. It doesn't have the trivia. It takes you to the play app. It takes you to the Disney play app, and that's where you then play. Guys. It says at home fun, and then you hit play in one player,

and then you select a category, random Walt Disney World characters, Disneyland film, TV history. I mean, we could pick Disneyland just for the hell of it, and then say start playing. We can play as a group. In what year did the original Disneyland Park in California

retire ticket books from use? Oh. An interesting question, Woody. Do we know the answer to this? I'm going to guess like. Well, there's choices. Okay. 1982, 1959, 1976.

I was going to guess the 70s. I'm going to guess. I think it's either 76 or 82. That would be my guess. I think it's 82. Let's see. It is 1982, yes. Good job. So that's fun, but again, it's another where you're like, why isn't that just not in the app?

Yeah. And that's how it works if you want to do all that Galaxy's Edge stuff that I don't find fun at all. Yes. Where you just have to go around and click things and stuff. And it's like i understand the idea is maybe fun but in actual execution it's not so fun well the one thing have you messed around with play app at all no how much how much doing the play app are you using on a daily basis i do like and i think it was avery monson who cued us in on this, but like Esmeralda, the fortune teller on the Main Street Penny Arcade.

So it's normally 50 cents to get a fortune told, but if you use the app at it, you can do it for free. That is a pretty good hack. That's a pretty good hack. And you get a little car. You get a little souvenir. Right. So there you go.

That is in there. And it gives you a fortune on one side and then like a chapter based story on the other. I don't like that. So I think I'm up to chapter three or four. I don't hate some of the stuff in here or anything. It's just how confusing it is to get to it. But like there's the gifts of Mara. There's like so many different like little games

and stuff you can play, which is like cool, but I don't know. There's something about it that isn't the best. I don't know. They should just within the app, they should just have heads up with disney categories yeah i'm surprised they didn't like buy heads up do we know who owns heads

up can we pitch on a heads up show or a movie like uh ellen degeneres maybe did she did she come up with it i think there was like some sort of ellen tie-in maybe i don't know but you should just have games for yeah games for lines right like i remember trying to do like the qr like the code stuff in galaxy's edge when i first went it was just nothing it is ellen you're right yeah she played it on her show yeah wow i didn't know that ellen owns heads up yeah wow okay so she's the one who's going to pitch the movie, I guess. Yeah, probably. The Heads Up movie. Yeah. It's big IP.

Heads Up, the game. I mean, that is what they think. That is what companies think. I know. You're such dummies. I clicked on the trivia thing and I selected the random trivia option. And just even if you're not a big walt disney world person you might get this one true or false while it's fun to splash about epcot in the rain

you can always take shelter beneath spaceship earth if you don't want to get wet true or false why is that yeah i i mean yeah because there's like an overhang so i would say true yeah what did you write these questions i don't that that one was so odd because it's like you look at a picture of space where there's clearly room underneath it yeah fun fact is did you know despite the seemingly round shape of spaceship earth the water that runs down the structure during a rainstorm gets drained by a specially designed system okay well these are facts that you would learn about this is the type of dry fact you learn on podcast the ride yeah are there more drainage based oh this is about the dapper

dams uh um well i want to know about drainage keep reading see if there's more drainage stuff i want to point out something on the app so there's different like there's a pull-down menu you can go on the map and see attractions you can see like character stuff and the character stuff is pretty helpful to know where you can meet a character because some like if you have kids and you want to you want to do that dining blah blah blah but you go to guest services and then there's a list of different things you can like where's an atm excuse me where's an atm where's a baby care center and all of it looks pretty standard and then i get to the one thing on there that says cakes at Disneyland

resort. And I go, wait, what cakes? Then it says cakes at Disneyland resort, celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, a honeymoon,

or even the, even the every day with a specialty cake find on the map. And there's only one location at the Disneyland hotel in the goofy's kitchen. And I guess you could just go and get a cake. Jason, did you know about this? I knew there was, no, was no i knew there's like uh if it's a birthday you can get stuff sent to the room well sure yeah there's room service and things like that you could get but on the app

it's just cake orders so you can just get a full like sheet cake at the disneyland hotel and i guess eat it out in the pool that's pool i also your sam's i like the filter for spa and recreation yes yes and there's which is just about pools it's mostly about pools there's obviously a spa gray in california but yes there's there's that um most everything else yeah is like is is basically you know like there's a thing called track this is travel insurance and there's no locations to get that so i guess you can you used to's a thing called travel insurance and there's no locations to get that. So I guess you used to be able to buy travel insurance for your vacation. I'm not seeing that.

You don't see travel insurance? In category? Oh, it's in guest services. Yeah, yeah. So you can get strolled. Like it says you were stroller, like service animals. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Picture spots.

Bottle filling stations. There we go. And they have a bunch of new bottle filling stations. There's new bottle filling, which I'm happy about. And they are themed. Yeah. They are nice. Like Pooh Bear, it I'm happy about. And they are themed. Yeah. They are nice. Like Pooh Bear, it kind of looks like it's a honey pot or something.

I like that. And we're good. That's pretty good. Hand sanitizer locations. In-room celebrations. Locker rentals. Okay. Yeah.

Mobile dining. But I was just, and then the designated smoking areas, those are gone, but it's still on the app. So they haven't updated the app to tell you you can't smoke anywhere anymore because it used to be uh used to be a couple places at least you could do it so that stuff is interesting because i never really looked at that before i mean there's the rest you can find all the restrooms on the app unlock your room door with the disneyland app yes i have not tried that i haven't stayed there since they uh added that feature but that's pretty standard

with most hotels i feel like these days um but i also like how they name some of the restrooms too like you know tomorrowland station restrooms but then they'll this one i like wetzel's pretzels restrooms so it's wetzel's pretzels obviously it's i don't know actually what that restroom is but that must be in downtown it is yes um but which can i say i hate that that if you look for just dining reservations they'll include downtown disney downtown disney in your options yeah you should have to like select like i'm just saying i'm imagining that as a trap for someone who doesn't know better who's like oh right right oh oh amazing we can eat at this jazz kitchen that must be in new orleans square ralph brennan must be a character a disney

movie character we've never heard of no that's a downtown disney that's a mile and a half away yeah just walk out of the park like ralph brennan is one of the rescuers right yeah that was one of the mouses that was a mouse name ralph brennan that's what that's what bums me out is like yeah is like trying to imagine like a well-intentioned family who doesn't know a thousand things about this already trying to navigate this extremely expensive day with high expectations from their children and getting trapped eating at ralph brennan's jazz kitchen well we had a lovely meal at Ralph Brennan's. I will say that in 2019. It's delicious.

I used to eat there before or after seeing a show at the House of Blues that used to be this. Oh, wow, yeah. When I was a teen. Which concerts did you see at House of Blues? Flogging Molly, one of my first concerts when I was 15. Wow. Yeah, I saw them there twice, actually.

Wow. How many concerts do you think you've seen there? Four. Yeah, I saw them there twice, actually. Wow. How many concerts do you think you've seen there? Four. It was also where we had our choir banquet there, I believe my freshman year. At the House of Blues? Mm-hmm. Nice.

Wow. And the House of Blues moved. Yeah. It's still kind of in Anaheim, but it's over by that other thing called The Grove. The Garden Walk. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Which I was just spent a lot of time in the other day. And it's weird. Yeah. Why were you there? Because I was trying a new parking trick. I was trying a different parking hack. And then I, which works by the way. I mentioned this on our Patreon that if you park at that Garden Walk and you go get something from Starbucks or the restaurant Huckleberry's, if you have like a garden walk and you go get something from Starbucks

or the restaurant Huckleberry's, if you have like a pancake at Huckleberry's, there's a mysterious phone number that you text your receipt and the validation, whatever, parking ticket you got when you came into the parking garage. If you text both of those to a mysterious number, they will just text back validated

and then it's only $18 for the day. And I tested it out and it worked. Pretty good hack. It's a pretty good hack, but it's only 18 for the day and i tested it out and it worked but it's a pretty good hack but there's a it's a strange mall it's very very weird there's a magician i've never heard of his club there and he's got like a whole lounge going on i promised this on the patreon but i'll promise to this on the main feed there's going to be content coming about this anaheim garden walk there just content coming yeah prepare for contenteim garden walk there just is content coming yeah prepare for content because it's coming and it's about a mall near disneyland as a disneyland person i don't mind us learning lessons from disney world like our magic band's gonna really

take off you know like will there be things that we really love but it's just sort of me to me like it there's they're different you know so everything like builds up around Anaheim that feels like it's chasing or it's just like that's a wildly different massive compound with a totally different infrastructure size, like amount and scale of hotels. Yeah. And I kind of want Anaheim to just like chill out sometimes. Yeah. Well, it's a different culture there. It's a whole different, everything is different. They they have you can get a magic band now at disneyland and i will say i liked magic band a lot when we do in florida and i still like it but i don't have a desire to get

it here i don't know why that is i think it's because it's not multiple it's not multiple date like the like the idea that you're gonna do four parks over four days it's a big trip it just feels different than like it was complimentary well that was a nice thing yes i didn't buy one charge but at least if you're like doing a big trip you're like okay yeah my old one does work still in orlando for now oh okay or i have two actually i have a purple one i have like a standard purple one and then a gray one but yeah i don't have any desire to do it out here i don't know i didn't think that would be me i thought man as soon as they come to disneyland i'm gonna be a guy with a thing and like a little charm on it has apple pay to anyone you're making me use the app

my phone's out all the time and now i'm sure we all do this when we go you have to have some sort of charging cube well yes and we've talked about this there was a whole the fuel the rocket fuel rods and the lawsuit that ensued when they tried to change the terms of the deal. And then they'd go back on that. But I don't even know if they have those in the park anymore after the lawsuit. I bought one last year. But now that I'm thinking about it, I don't know if I saw it. But yes, you have to have that.

My phone died. I said this on the second gate. I said this, my phone died when I was there and I had to text everybody from my computer at Award Wieners. So I just had to tell Lindsay, look, my phone is dead. My computer is still alive

and I'm at Award Wieners right now and I'm eating film strip fries and I'll be home soon. And she said, I love you, baby. I love you so much. She got riled up and she was so excited

to hear all that. Yeah. That's just like, that's a real reality is that it really drains the phone. Yes. Oh, yeah. No, it's pretty done. And the Fuel Rod has not really changed in about 10 years. The Fuel Rod gives you 15% charge. The phones have just gotten bigger.

The Fuel Rod is a big scam. The batteries have gotten bigger. And they're really bad. And there's better, you have to bring your own little brick or something. Or just, I guess, keep turning your phone on and off. But that's not that practical thing. When my family was visiting, I kept, like, if we split up, I kept texting my dad. Like, we're here.

Just look at the map in the app. And he's like, I hate this app. Like, app like anytime would explain mobile ordering the app or stuff like I would just see the blood like yeah and he has been going to Disney World since the 70s I know that's how I had that moment with my mom where she was like she was the amazing captain for

years yeah and now her knowledge is almost obsolete like it's so sad to be like oh yeah my mom has a good attitude she's like oh great love it but you know there used to be a time where she would at least be like well i think we should go you know blah she's like i don't know you you gotta take it because like the learning curve is way too steep to expect her to understand and they train people like fast for like 20 plus years and like they train people like oh Pass for like 20 plus years. And like they train people like, oh, do this, eat it this time of day, go this time of day.

And so much of that is defunct. And I bought the Lightning Lane multi-pass for four of us when my family was visiting. And they were only here for a few days. And they're like, oh, thank God you did that the day we were at disneyland park and i was like yeah but the trade-off was 120 dollars oh yeah yeah yeah so far thank you yes like oh yeah that's what i want after one of these days my like sister like the one time that i took a strategy you know she like bought me a hat they paid for my yeah like they're paying for if any of those up charges that i'm doing to help navigate the day for their children they're paying for it and i'm like hey just so you know i'm i'm

spending this money on this thing and they're like yeah whatever thank you they were paying for a lot but this we ran into a thing where he like oh i got park coppers for everyone i was like well i think by magic he might still be active but i was the one who made all the park reservations. So if I delete it, the one ticket, everyone's reservations would go, and I'm like, I guess I'm just using the park hopper. This doesn't make any sense. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about where merging reservations is not intuitive.

You maybe could have called someone to have them do it for you, but maybe not. Yeah. But you're just on the phone for five or ten minutes just going representative, representative. When Apple buys Disney in the next few years, they'll probably fix all of this, I'm assuming. I would assume. Maybe they won't. Maybe it'll be worse.

But it doesn't feel like Disney has any incentive to change. It's going to be still kind of pieced together. It's funny. This changes every few years because years and years ago it was Disney will buy Apple and now it's flocked to Apple buying Disney.

Well, there's going to be two companies going forward and it's going to be helped by the political situation. Exxon Chipotle. Just as Parks and Rec. Comcast Apple. Let's brainstorm real quick

on our way out here. What do we want from the app? What would we like? I mean, obviously, we're not getting what we want in the sense that, like, at this point, Lightning Lane going away would be awesome. Just let's playing field. Let's level it. Let's even it out.

Yeah. I would accept that. Like, fine. Great. We all have the same shot. But they're not going to do that. So what do you want from the app what do you want to streamline everything basically 36 a person to me is not a

crazy upcharge yeah what i would like to be included in that payment would be that i can pre-book more things yeah the fact that like you're you've paid for this money, but it is still relying on your on-day effort is the downside for me. So even if it was piecemeal where it's like, okay, you've paid for it, pre-book four. And then day of, you're going to get whatever more you can g can yeah you know you can garner whatever but like it would be great to know those like certain times of day we're like okay i'm gonna get like two really big rides in the beginning of the day give us a great start and then let me get us two during the three to five like dreariness to like give us another like boost of energy or something we'll take a nice long lunch i think if i could do if that money got me a little bit more the time ahead, I would like that.

And I want the app to have way, I don't want the tip, the two toggles I don't like. Oh, as far as going back and forth from the like whatever portal. We should say they'll say like enter the queue, and then there'll be like a port, like there's different words for like clicking on buttons, and sometimes it'll be like, enter the magic key portal, and then some things will just be a virtual queue. So there's different names for just clicking to get to another page. Like, okay, so this is my welcome, but it's not the home. Yeah. Which doesn't make any sense. And then like today's plans, the tip board versus my day. Right.

I don't like that. Oh, I see what you're saying. Like this toggle is a bummer to me. So I just want it to be my day, which is my itinerary. Right. That has tips, like maybe a genie icon on that page I could click on. Right. That's like, hey, we noticed you have a gap here and you're going to be in this part of the park.

Here's the two or three things that are nearest. Here's the best snack to get over there. Yeah. Yeah. You know, like going back and forth. I've watched cast members have to explain this to people. Right. Because then you go back to the tip board, and that's where it shows you current wait times.

It's just not good. It's not simple. It should be a little simple. Yeah, a little more intuitiveness. Yeah. Yeah. I want, yes. Because in Disney World, you can pre-book,

or at least you could at some point, book three ahead of time and then do it yourself. So it would be nice if you could do like six because then I would feel okay. Because it is a thing where you pay $32 and you could end up like doing three in one day if you're not on top of it or you could do 15. Yes, yes. So that's the problem. And it's like in some ways you were like, okay, there could be an extra tier that's $50 where I get six, but it's like, we can't do that. I don't want to do that.

And, but it's, but it's fighting my instincts. Or, or like if you've, if you book, maybe you get rewarded for like having a reservation further out or whatever. Like, Hey, if you start, if you book lightning lane two weeks before your visit, you get five, I don't know, because that's probably going to benefit the planners anyway. get five i don't know because that's probably gonna benefit the planners anyway yeah i don't know just give us a few that we get to pre-book because then that takes the like that takes the anxiety down a little bit where you're like okay i have some footholds i know they're gonna get on space. Thank the Lord. I don't have to reinvent the wheel.

Yeah. I guess this is the silliest thing. Three per park, maybe? Okay. So you're getting rewarded for purchasing a park hopper. Yeah. So you pay for Lightning Lane. You get three pre-books per park that you have a ticket to.

Yeah. Sure. Okay. And this was a big part of the vacation experience in Florida. Like, oh, you got like 60 days out or 45 days out. You can pre-book some FastPasses. Yes. And then when you use them, then you can get more.

Yes. And then COVID, they used COVID. They're like, all right, we're getting rid of that. At least for the free level. I forget whether it's back a little bit yeah um i've got a couple things sure go ahead uh one the thing that i find very stressful with virtual queues is it kind of doesn't account for your location despite you have to have location services on so it's like son if you book at 7 a.m.,

you could end up being like your virtual queues at 8.30 or not. It's like, oh, we live in Los Angeles. It could take 90 minutes or two hours to get down there and park. That's impossible. So like if there was something in there where it's like, okay, you got a virtual queues button. When you get within like a mile mile we'll assign you a time that would be great the other thing is that a thing we kind of learned in florida uh because we had different ticket types and we were trying to get

everyone in everyone else's phone so you could try for the virtual queue for the guardians galaxy roller coaster um we learned this and someone eventually described it to us as like that is a fail safe but there is a qr code in the app and if everyone scans everyone else's app or everyone else's digital ticket then you're all on everyone's phones and i would like more things like more fail safes yeah more fail safes more idiot proof thing right you know okay because it took us a while of trying to get all our tickets together yes that was before we stumbled on these qr codes he was upset with too much too much app top which right now he's probably like in a hospital right now the doctor's like what's wrong with this man his head is swollen we can't tell he's just screaming out in pain he's like these people are being naughty on my podcast being a little naughty yeah

he sent a picture a little while ago and i can't talk about what it i'll talk about yes i saw the photo as well and the photo will show it to you really really really really good. Well, it'll be brought up eventually. Here's the thing. I was like, I got to count some of my suggestions, but I'm like, Disney's going the way of every other business where they're just trying to suck as much money out of me and nothing is ever going to get better. And here's a solution, I think, to the problem we're having.

And it's not a great solution, but it is a solution. I believe there should be a group of checkers. I'm a checker but it is a solution i believe there should be a group of checkers i believe i'm a checker this is a self-described checker and there's a lot of people out there that checkers you're a checker as well i think there should be a pool of checkers and we sign up for slots to help other checkers on their disneyland day so basically say someone say you're going uh thursday and i'll say okay and I'll say I'm going Wednesday. You will check for me on Wednesday from home, and then I will check from home for you on the Thursday. So I will get to enjoy a full, great day, but there's a person like Mission Impossible, like Benji.

There's a man in the chair. There's a man in the van, a man in the chair, like Benji. There's a man in the chair. There's a man in the van. Yes. A man in the chair searching for you. Now, that's going to take up a day, but it's not, you can still get some work done in between. Sure. But that is going to take care of the problem looking at your phone. Yes. So if you exchange days, I'm serious, if you want to do this, I'll do this. Yes.

As long as I don't have, if I have like somewhat of a free day. We could exchange checking. This is like people who vote swap. This is like people who vote swap this is like people who vote swap and it's yes it's called man in the van is good i like that that's that's a clean title for it but if all the checkers band together we could only have to pay 32 don't have to do the 400 yes and then from remote because you can do it from home if you gave me your login i can log in and still check it doesn't matter but the the virtual queue, I'd still have to be like, hey, Mike, get in the virtual queue.

It's open because it's based on location, right? You know what? If you gave me your login for your app and you were in the park, I bet I could still pull it at noon. At 7 a.m., it could be anybody could do it. Right. Well, a thing I haven't tried is like setting up a VPN and picking like an Anaheim, tricking it. Oh, that's interesting. And just thinking you're in an Anaheim, signing on from Anaheim, but isn't smart enough. I wonder if it would have to be in the grounds or if it just thinks Anaheim in general.

Right. Because I ran into this even trying to like show up for an Oga's Cantina where they're like, we can tell you're not close enough. Like we know. You know, the dining stuff, even the dining stuff, they're like, you're not close enough to check in. Like I'm like, I got us a reservation. It took us longer to get from parking.

And I'm like, oh no, no, no. And it's like, hey, go ahead and check in for your dining reservation. And they're like, you can't check in yet. You're not close enough. And I was like in downtown Disney. You. And I was like, in downtown Disney. I was like, very, very close. McDonald's tried to do this to me when I ordered a nice coffee and I wanted it waiting for me at the counter when I got there.

But they said, you're not close. And then there was an extra prompt on McDonald's app where you can say, yes, I am close. OK. But it's not like that at Disney, I don't think. Yeah. I mean, again, it was fine. I don't know why every single time I can get into Oga's Cantina. Does no one want to go there anymore? it's not like that at disney i don't think yeah i mean again it was fine i don't

know why every single time i can get into oga's canteen does no one want to go there it's not a big well it's always crowded when i've been in there but i don't know it's not as it's not as it's really fun do you ever do the fuzzy tauntaun which one's that that's the one that numbs your mouth oh because it has szechuan in it yeah i think that's what it is it's in the foam and i got one a couple weeks ago and i took like I kind of was like Being so funny I was being like funny And I took Like a bite of

Kind of the foam And there was so much Szechuan or whatever In there That I just coughed I just had a hacking Cough immediately I just like sprayed

I was like so embarrassed Oh man Because it's so close Quarters in there Yeah I was with my friend And it was fine But I didn't get it

On anybody But like I was like He was being so funny I was being funny Because I was taking a big bite of the foam this is huge you can get a beer at the yes and a couple other places as well you can get it at uh uh carnation on main street i believe as well you can get like a cocktail at carnation now this is huge for me this is a big deal that's a big deal for me. It's a limited menu. Because I enjoy drinking at California Adventure. There are some great places to get drinks over there.

Well, yes. We are big Carthay Manhattan guys. Yes, of course. This is what's converted many a person that we probably all have in common. Where people are like, I don't know. I go, well, come down. We'll do the day. And my general thing is midday, you go to the Carthay Lounge, you have a Manhattan.

Yeah. In my younger years, you might have two. Yeah. But at least you have one. And then you come out of there and you're like, Disneyland's wonderful. I did that with my two friends who got motion sick. Oh, wow. I was like, let's go take a long break at Carthay.

It was great. Yes. That's a real re-energizer. Yeah. So anyway, I mean, yeah, look look there's good things about the app but it's complicated and they're trying it feels like they're trying to actively make everything feel bad they're trying to make us feel bad yeah and it would be nice if they could at least just simplify some of the stupid stuff in the app if it was easier you would have an easier time making

an argument to your group being like hey someone else want to take the next turn? But I couldn't imagine asking my sister to do that. No. You know, we'd lose valuable time. Well, I was going to say, don't trust her. I don't trust her. I wouldn't trust my sister to do it. No offense to her. She wouldn't know because she doesn't go enough.

Like that was the one time my sister-in-law, and it was an issue where our reservations, it was hard to merge. We had to go get someone to help us to do it. I think we ended up scanning something, but it was still weird and not had to go get someone help us to do it i think we ended up scanning something but it was still weird and not as easy as it should be right but we were trying before when we were like well we just have to find some sort of band-aid for this solution we were simul booking you know yeah yeah yeah yeah so anyway i have a partner in the fight but

it's still solidary only yeah but two i mean two, two alphas can't exist in a group as well. So you have to understand, I think. No, and then she's bringing her like, you know, in Orlando, it's like this. And I'm like, listen, I appreciate that. It's great. But like, you're in land now. Right.

Put some respect on its name. You're the top dog in lands. Yeah. You're an alpha. You're an alpha checker like I am. Yeah. And there's, I don't know. It would be interesting.

Let's poll the audience. Who out there are alpha checker like I am. Yeah. And there's, I don't know. It would be interesting. Let's poll the audience. Who out there are alpha checkers of the group? And what do we think the percentage of those type of people are? And beta checkers, what do you think you're bringing to the table? And how can I support you more? Jason's a beta checker, I think. Oh, for sure. Yeah.

He knows how to do it. I like to wander around and look at the landscaping. But you know how to do it. I know how to do it. If I went down on in disneyland day and i said i can and i'm gonna be at the like first date or whatever jason needed you to take care like take care of it you would be able to do it i think you were trained up stuff you were trained to do it have your ticket but you will say you will let me be an alpha checker on

a day yo absolutely yeah take the lead yeah yeah yeah but scott we wouldn't he doesn't want any part of it he would kind of reluctantly do it but like yeah you're beta checker and then he's whatever give me another letter in a greek yeah yeah delta though he's a delta checker that's pretty far down that's uh uh so yeah anyway uh we'll let us know we'll post a poll on whatever social media i don't know what social media to use also. This is a big debate going on. It's a whole thing of like, do we stay on the thing with the guy? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Do we stay on the thing with the guy? I don't know. I left the thing before the guy. I've been off the thing with the guy for like, I think like five years. Wow, really? Yeah. So, other guy is also. I heard the other guy isn't good either. Wow, really? Yeah. So I'm, other guy is also, I heard the other guy isn't good either.

He's not good either, but right now he's a little less bad. And also the actual like discourse is a little less bad. Yeah, for now. For now. Because everything gets bad too. How do you spend much of your day mad about things out of your control?

Well, then I fell into like, I did get on threads a little bit. Oh, threads. Which is still pretty bad. But it's very echo chamber in a different way, you know, which is, you know, different. But no, I had gotten sort of post 2016 and then maybe a couple more years after that, I had whittled it back down to just Instagram to try to be like, it's impossible to be a comedian right now and not have a social media.

Right. But I can limit how many I have so that I'm not spending that much time on them. Sure. I like looking at the pretty picture. Yes. So in my like good moments i'm i'm only on instagram and i try to put a timer on it okay well we'll talk we'll figure it out see i'm just not against i'm against being on my phone in general which is why

yeah like good for you i'm trying and they're making it hard yeah anytime i go to anything that wants me to have an like every single unique airline I have to have their app. Oh, right, right, right. I just reject that they all need to be apps, you know, like. Yeah. But they really do make it easier. It sucks. Yeah.

If there was just like a magic band for all airlines. Yeah. With a little plane on it or something. I just want to be able to log in, get my ticket on a browser window and then upload it to my Apple wallet. Yeah, that's good wallet which you mostly can do but a lot of times they're like but don't you want the American Airlines proprietary app

she's like no I don't need this shit I tried because you can technically get your airline ticket on the Apple watch and I tried it and like they saw me going to do it and I swear I heard a like they're me going to do it. And I swear I heard a, like they're like, it's not kind of okay.

On the fifth try, it worked. I think in the next 10 years, like it will, there will be some like, I don't know if it'll be like the guy, the guy invented the thing in the, in your neural link or whatever. I don't know if it'll be that, but there'll be like something like it's a chip in your like wrist and everything's just in the chip wrist not for me yeah but you're gonna it's mandatory damn it okay i guess for me that's gonna be yeah the chip app is gonna be intolerable i i don't think i knew this about myself like as a young person but i'm like i i have no uh tech design. I'm not an early adopter.

I'm basically a Luddite. I will do what I have to do, but I'm like, no, I don't want that. I don't want any of that. Well, it will be a law. It'll be a law. It'll be a law in the next four years. In the next four years, they're going to get to chip law?

There'll be a chip law. What about the Chips Act? Unrelated. Different. All right. Well, the Chips Act? Unrelated. Different. All right. Well, thank you, Jess McKenna. You've survived Podcast the Ride. Woo!

App talk. Boy, it feels good to be naughty, doesn't it? Talking about apps like this. Please exit through the gift shop. Plug away. What do you got going on? You know, you can still always listen to off book podcast even though we don't do um weekly studio apps we got some new live apps that are up

and we're touring so um you can check those dates out um there's a link in my bio at at jess jess mckenna on instagram the one i'm on or um off book on any socials. Yeah, come see Off Book Live. It's fun. Yeah, it's great. So yeah, go, yeah, Instagram. Jess, Jess McKenna. And threads, yeah, okay. And is there an Off Book as well, Instagram?

There is, yeah. Okay. At Off Book Pod. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, so go check that out. As for us, we're on the stuff with the guy at Podcast to Ride, and we're on Instagram at Podcast to Ride.

But Patreon.com slash podcast the ride there's more app talk this month as well different things jason and i are really spreading our wings out here yeah uh and getting uh rowdy with it crazy app yeah i was just agreeing and it sounded like a judgment uh and honestly in the last few weeks there's been app talk as far as uh phone apps and appet app talk as far as phone apps and appetizer talk as jason started talking about chili's appetizer and cheese planks and how there's something's going viral where people do a cheese pull you know about the cheese the viewer she's not on social media as much but jason was informing me because he's the one who

checks in the most that the teens are going what teens or just people in general are going wild they're doing a cheese pull. So it's like a phenomenon going on where they do a cheese pull with like a cheese plank and a Chili's. What's a cheese plank? Cheese pull is kind of agnostic to anywhere. Jason was using the term cheese plank to describe a mozzarella stick. Because I kept hearing it on

TikTok because Chili's mozzarella sticks are kind of like rectangles. Uh-huh. As opposed to like round. Cylindrical. Yeah. And so it's just how good of a pull you can get. Yeah.

You gotta ask this guy. But you get a good pull, but I never thought those were that good. So I guess I have to revisit. You have to revisit and we have to get you to go viral. Yep. Guess how. Yeah. We must.

We're going to Chili's. Forever Dog. This has been a Forever Dog production. Executive produced by Mike Carlson, Jason Sheridan, Scott Gairdner, Brett Boehm, Joe Cilio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts, please visit foreverdogpodcasts.com and subscribe to our shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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