Podcast: The Ride - Dogpatch, U.S.A. With Christopher Cantwell

Episode Date: August 23, 2019

Dogpatch, U.S.A. was a park based on the staggeringly popular Li'l Abner comic strip. Christopher Cantwell (co-creator, Halt And Catch Fire) tells all about the only theme park where you could catch and eat a trout. These details barely scratch the surface. Prepare yourselves. Listen to Podcast: The Ride Ad-Free on Forever Dog Plus: http://foreverdogpodcasts.com/plus New Second Gate episode next week: patreon.com/podcasttheride Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forever Dog They tried to sell it on eBay twice. It's Dogpatch USA on Podcast The Ride. Welcome to Podcast The Ride, a show about theme parks that somehow went 109 episodes before talking about a ride called Earthquake Magoon's Brain Rattler. I'm Scott Gairdner, joined by Mike Carlson. Shocking. This is Mike. Yeah, when you said that, I think that's one of your first pitches for doing this episode was have you ever heard of earthquake magoon's brain rattler it jumps off the page my god yeah we should really just be doing it about that ride specifically but we're gonna do a whole thing you can go on it in the world it's still in wisconsin but we'll get to that later jason sheridan is here yeah this is a real quirker this is like this it's a brain rattler thing is a brain rattler this is like hard rock park level but i had a limited time to prepare

for it i was just like reading stuff like i'm not gonna be ready it was every effort to not just let let it consume my life it had to stop at some point and we had to do the episode and the topic comes to us courtesy of a guest who i'm so excited is here he's the co-creator of amc's halt and catch fire he's a comic book writer behind the upcoming editions of the mask and dr doom and the director of the feature film the parts you lose with aaron paul christopher cantwell is here hey what's happening thank you so much for having me now it, and thank you for supplying this topic. Dark patch? Yeah, because we talked a while back about you talking about what Six Flags Over Texas,

which is what you... Yeah, that was the theme park I grew up going to because I grew up in Dallas. Sure, sure. So I went to Six Flags Over Texas a lot. Uh-huh, uh-huh. And that's where we were heading, I think. Yeah, I mean, because I spent a lot of time there. I was actually just back in Texas last week and was driving by in arlington and was

seeing sure like the rides i used to go on are dwarfed by new giant roller coaster like the i where it's i was afraid of the one roller coaster like i used to be afraid of roller coasters when i was a kid and then got over it at six flags but there was one that was so big that i like i don't care what i go on now but like i'll go on the rides at the la county fair like no matter what they are but like that that roller coaster from a distance was like even just looking at it yeah it was insane which one is that do you recall i don't know which one it is it's because i'm not i'm not up on you're not you don't know which one it is. It's because I'm not, I'm not up on. You don't know the name of the newsletter? You don't know the manufacturers? Yeah, yeah.

Probably, if I had to guess, it's the new Texas Giant. I bet you it's the new Texas Giant. Because the old one used to be the tallest roller coaster in the world. But there's no way. I think they tore that down. And now it's whatever that is. So whatever's going on there now, it just makes it like. It's just like giant. Yeah. Everything's lame that you were so afraid to conquer yeah like you can see

judge roy scream which is the original roller coaster there wow you can still see that from the highway but it just looks like a stack of matches sorry judge roy scream yes so that's that's the roller coaster it's i think that's my favorite roller coaster because that that's the one where i still remember it clicking and being like i'm not afraid of roller coasters anymore because i was like well wait a minute this is fine sure but it's a wooden roller coaster very basic named after the hanging judge judge roy bean famous for a lot of executions in the old west oh okay oh that's an old that's not a uh that's an 1800s texas it's like a real person i guess yeah i guess it's a texas person probably has he been like turned into a character

in the way like jack the ripper has been turned like you know what i mean like he was a horrible man but now we sort of have probably fiction i'm sure like he was known as the hanging judge yeah which is like cool man but i mean back in the 80s of course everyone in texas was like this is awesome i'm sure they still are like that in Texas. They might be. Yes. Certain pockets of it. But this is Judge Roy Scream.

Totally unrelated. So it's worse. It would be like call. Like, I mean, I guess he was a judge. So it was a legal killing. But it would be like having a son of Sam ride or something like a guy who murdered people. Who's the most corrupt law enforcement official we can name? I guess.

Yeah, it would be like Arpaio. That's thank you. Oh, yeah. people yeah who's the most corrupt law enforcement official we can name this right after uh yeah it would be like uh arpaio arpaio that's thank you oh yeah jesus christ yeah wow it's like a gravitron but it's sheriff joe's fright fest is a lot scarier okay sure there is a thing coming up where the the theme park does dovetail with a real life political figure who is very super problematic well we'll come up to that later there's a little teaser uh but that's what so we were i think we could have gotten a great episode out of six flags over texas but then you said well there's also this other thing that i might want to talk about i'll talk about you and say oh right what's that and i'm like on i'm sort of metering like well i don't want to go too obscure

i mean what's the deal with that mostly talking about six flags that's what i thought okay and then i and then you described a little more i just got reacquainted to the fact that it is a hillbilly theme park devoted to the comic strip lil abner and i just i think i said maybe only that to you guys and maybe earthquake magoons brain rattler and you were both like whoa whoa whoa whoa hold your horses i specifically remember sending the first two paragraphs of the wikipedia page and going uh yeah what it's crazy yeah um and i think i i think we also both we what i thought right away is lil abner okay so that's an old comic strip thing it's got Lil in it that

sounds like the kind of thing that Jason would really enjoy that'd be way into in Jason's wheelhouse because Jason likes old timey things yeah Jason likes old comics Nancy and Sluggo

like there's a lot of Lil characters in the history of comic a lot of Lil Dots Lil Audrey there's a lot of Lil characters a little history of comic a lot of little dots little audrey there's a lot of little characters a little lord fauntleroy also not maybe not a little rascals little rascals yeah it's not a little yeah it's not little is the domain of the rapper but at a certain time it was like uh kids up to no good it was either a very fancy boy or a very poor boy that was the comic strip

the scrappy no shoes kid in the depression era yeah making it work yeah just little lil whoever and in an ironic twist rappers some of the most famous people in america just as lil abner was in his time yeah that was a big deal right yeah when little abner and his betrothed daisy may got married finally they appeared on the cover of life magazine wow what yes this is like the luke and laura of their day yeah it would any fictional wedding get that today i don't think there's enough like cultural force i feel like you get the real wedding but you wouldn't get the like yeah yeah we're not celebrating

I mean you know because you're a comic book guy they did Batman and Catwoman but then she spoiler alert did it not work out it was a big yeah it was a big deal it was a big deal but they're still like you know once or twice a year there's like a big comics event that gets the ending gets

leaked to the press. Yes. The day before it comes out so they can write articles about it. Yeah. Yeah. That was one of those. Yeah. They've put like I feel like when Lois and Clark left him at the altar. We'll just say it. Yeah. Then like the one guy in his car going fuck.

Can I get the gift back or he probably just did it to colossus too is that right like less than a year ago oh really well all the heroes were there which is the most humiliating part getting cuckolded in front of all your strongest friends sorry bud yeah it didn't have the dignity of the shotgun wedding yeah that little abner was under but little abner what i was saying with all that was like so he's oh so it's like one of those yeah it's like a little rascal it's like must be some little kid that runs around jason could relate to

not really yeah look abner's like uh it's an ironic name yeah okay he's big dumb dude right lives in the holler. Lives in Dogpatch. Right. Lives in Dogpatch. With his family. Dogpatch existed as the town within this strip, and it was famous enough from that to devote a theme park to. Were you aware?

Would you have been aware of Low Labner without going to this place? No. So I had no idea until I was an adult what the theme of the theme park was. Because I think I stopped going to the theme park when i was six okay we would go the only reason i would go out there is we would drive from texas to arkansas where my grandfather had retired and so my grandmother and my grandfather were out in arkansas so on the way we would stop and do like like a whole several hours at dog patch usa so i just knew it as Dogpatch.

I was just like, oh, Dogpatch. And it's possible by that point because we're talking that's somewhere in 80s, I guess. Yeah. So this would have been like through the early 80s, stopping at around 88, I guess. Because at some point in time, they decreased the lil abner theme so it may have not even really been present by the time 1991 1991 was when they were like we are spending too much money yeah they let the rights go because i let the right people i looked it up you know doing one of those like nostalgia googles right and i was like dog patch this was years ago and i was

like oh wow it's like not only was it little admiratheme but it's been abandoned for 20 something years it hasn't been like regularly well maintained since the the mid 90s which isn't to say they haven't they they've tried they've certainly tried pieces of there's pockets of it right yeah and i think it splinters off like just the hotel has new ownership or they've or just the caves have been taken back by somebody wants to own just the caves and everything else everything else has been taken back by the wilderness yeah because when i googled it i it was completely abandoned and it was like all the urbanex photos of it right that were terrifying yeah yeah which we uh sort of make fun of those folks who go into just semi-abandoned,

how unsafe is it really, but act like they're spelunking in very dangerous places. This place I could see there being some pretty crazy animals. You guys read the full Wikipedia article, right? Yes, yes. So it was very dangerous. Yes, yeah, yeah. Something happened.

I don't even know if I want to say it. Do we do it in the order of the... It's your podcast, guys. It's so good. Should we start with some... Should we start going all the way back? Should we talk about Al Cap? I would love to talk about Al Cap.

Let's talk about Al Cap. I only know him from this park and Andy Cap's hot fries. Is that him? It's not him. Oh, shit. That's another hot fries i thought that too you can still buy those certain places yes you can yeah well who's andy capp andy capp is a drunk drunk comic strip character that also confuses it you think of labner is something else andy capp and al capp are so similar right and andy capp still is the mascot for hot fries which

i believe is his only appearance in any media, is on a candy box. No, it's not candy. It's hot fries. It's chips. Oh, it's like chips. It's like chips. It's like chips. It's fries.

They're hot fries. Oh, right. And they are incredibly cheap. They're like shitty Cheetos. Yes. They're very cheap. Like, instantly, you're sick. Are they like Takis?

They're kind of like Takis, kind of like potato sticks. Basically, they just put the potato through the thing to make fries and then fried them and then covered them in that powder and suck out any resemblance of water. They're so dry. Like they could eat them on the space shuttle.

It would survive for a hundred years, really. Got it. So, okay so well i mean so little abner is his little is is al cap's creation of a little hillbilly town uh it sounds a little charming from the outside but i've also seen it referred to as like hick face it's like the black face of right southern poor making fun of hillbilly like yeah of the holler which he is from you know he's from the south but it comes from his point of view of uh resenting and is that i'm gonna sound completely insensitive asking this but is that its sensitivity among like

the deep south or like because it's arkansas but that also feels like it would be like apple apple appalachia yeah and this is ozarks uh ozark mountains yeah which has kind of a classification of more action there's like a sensitivity there but i don't they don't seem to care about dog patch well but they like arkansas cares about dog patch which i understand sure yeah i mean it seems to me like they then they embraced it by like devoting a whole area to this they're like they weren't like a money maker i guess yeah yeah i suppose and was for i have a true story about arkansas this was i i had not been to arkansas since my grandparents lived there okay and i was driving a friend across the u.s to he was going to

go to uh business school at unc in chapel hill. And we stopped for lunch in Arkansas and we were just talking at the table and it was like a small diner place. And the waitress came up to me and said, are you all from England? Because we sounded so different from everybody else in there just talking normally. Like she literally thought we were from great Britain. Jeez.

Jeez. It was amazing. And you left out the part of the story where she had to like re-say it 10 times because you didn't understand it was an intense accent from england it was it was pretty wild well the in the comic strips and the little abner comic strips it is an accent that doesn't it doesn't seem of this earth to me it does seem like a connecticut guy yeah trying to verbalize it so the average person would read it phonetically oh yeah lots of bizarre spellings which puts it in that like racially offensive zone where like yeah like exaggerating it so much to where it sounds so stupid and weird and like another language it's uncomfortable certainly it's an it's a weird time because also at this time like when dog patch was doing well green acres petticoat junction and the beverly hillbillies

were all on tv and then they were all like canceled for that once almost this was in the wikipedia article this was called the great the southern purge or something like that the rural purge of like culture similar to we're not doing this anymore yeah yeah it all happened to one they even attribute like lassie going away to being part of this too that's so weird i had no idea about that. Yeah. And again, the liberal progressive in me is like, I'm so sorry. I didn't know about that. I had no idea. I had no sensitivity to how much the rural purge. God, I was enjoying this theme park when I was a child.

My parents, you know. I'm sorry. I assume there was no rural purge. I love the character, but you know. Then the other piece of context to me that was shocking was just how famous Al Cap was. Was like one of the most famous people in the country had a regular spot on the tonight show through three through jack parr steve allen and johnny carson that's amazing the first thing the thing i'm sure we all have

our own favorite al cap moments my favorite one is of course him confronting John and Yoko at their sitting. Yeah. Whoa, wait a minute. What? Yep. So, Alcat, despite being kind of a gadfly in later in life, made the turn that Scott Adams is currently doing into conservative maniac. Or who was the other one you said? PJ O'Rourke? PJ O'Rourke, I think, started to lose it towards the end, too.

Okay. It's a common syndrome. But he confronted them in their... Was this the one where they were in their bedroom? In Montreal. In Montreal, yeah. Basically, yeah. They were protesting Vietnam and war and everything.

But it was really just come hang out and talk to us. Yeah. So, the press came and they talked to them and... But people thought it was like, this is an orgy. Yes. Like more conservative folks, but it wasn't. It was just them sitting around. Right.

And Al... It's weird because there's a 10-minute video of it. oh my god well preserved uh and he has the photo of them like naked and and he's like you say you're uh shy huh you two are shy and he holds up the photo of them naked and he's like oh shy people taking photos like this and they're like yeah we're shy honestly the dialogue is a popular belief like little abner was not small right we have duality in this world it's like he thought he was going to come there and like really prove him wrong and then it's not particularly interesting none of them have anything interesting to say to montreal to do this presumably yeah their invite showed oh

they asked him to come because by this point okay so vocal yeah yeah okay little abner was about i guess like he was like you know anti-mccarthy uh when when that was happening but then like took the turn into becoming a notable hippie hater he was showing up at schools to like yell at peaceful events at peaceful events so they so John himself thought well maybe he can kind of represent yeah yeah let's talk to Al yeah it's so

bizarre and fascinating and uninteresting all at once because like I feel like they don't they probably just don't care they just like let him like wind himself out yeah John let him wind himself out. Yeah, John let him stay. He's the one that looks stupid. They kind of start yelling.

And then Al is yelling. Oh, I'm one of them. Yeah, there's yelling that happens. I mean, not like crazy yelling, but kind of just loud voice yelling. But he's trying to... Al Cap is just mad that students are protesting. Yes. This is the thing you keep finding.

This is the thing that turned him to conservatism is that he didn't like these spoiled college kids uh protesting things they didn't know about and that's really all he's in there to say and then he's kent stater shut up everything's fine yeah and then he's mad about class he's mad about the lyrics in the ballad of john and yoko where john says uh the way things are going they're going to crucify me he's like are they going to crucify what are they going to do They're going to crucify me He's like are they going to crucify What are they going to do They're going to crucify you you say And then John's just being kind of obtuse as well

And being like I meant all of us I meant we're all going to be And he's like what do you mean not me You don't speak for me And then they're just like talking at each other for two minutes And nothing gets done I don't know it's bizarre It's truly bizarre

When did he die Alcat 70 yeah he retired from the comic trip in 77 i was thinking he was 70 when he died um 77 yeah yeah okay so he didn't see john lennon killed no no statement on that i don't know why i want to hold him to account and be like, look. Look what you did, sir. Look what you did now. He was an early guy complaining about safe spaces on college campuses. Yes, that's what's crazy about him. He was like a New York Times editorial style crank complaining about these college students. He doesn't seem like he has any sort of deep held conservative beliefs.

It felt like he just like his brain. It felt like he saw a glimpse of like deep held conservative beliefs it felt like he just like his brain it felt like you like saw a glimpse of fox news from the future it broke his brain and he's just like these college kids god damn it what are they doing they don't know what they're talking about isn't that what a lot of it boils down to ultimately is like but you wouldn't have any ideas you're young i'm old so i have all the ideas why what do you know about yeah it's uh i've lived on the earth look at purely at age yeah exactly you know more than a 29 my age is a bigger number my age is bigger you don't understand i have unlimited money i'm authority figure i can leverage my celebrity so much of the political problems whether it's probably like racially or just from age are just i don't want to be replaced yeah people have this terrifying feeling of being replaced i love how

we're just going down this road too but i have a pet theory which is that conservatism is they're both rooted in a fear of death so conservatism is a fear of being replaced fear of change will like change will lead to death right right and then there's also if we don't change we will be we will be eradicated by that change because change is happening whether we want to or not yes so we would be destroyed by not changing right yeah i hear that wow that's an eloquent way to put it yeah you're welcome guys change is the only constant as my meditations tell me so yeah al cap presages a lot of nasty stuff i should say as a result of that encounter paul mccartney ended up calling al cap a wicked old git. That's amazing.

Get him, Paul. Drag him, Paul. Like, he didn't do a lot of dragging necessarily either. No, he would drag John in a song or two. Sure. But then he would just show up at his apartment at the Dakotas. Yeah, they get a shot next week. Watch SNL.

I read that John asked him not to come by unannounced anymore when they had their baby he was like hey man you can't just stop by and then paul got really pissed like like a like fuck you you know what i mean like okay but then a few months later it was fine he just had to call ahead but security concerns were probably smart yeah isn't that weird he's just like walking I mean I guess in New York I guess you're just like yeah we could go yeah we could go down that road

yeah it's a dark one it's a dark one so there's multiple books about Al Cap one of which is called which is called the enigma of Al Cap which is a good title because he was pro gaygay rights and pro-civil rights. But he also had over half a dozen cases of indecent exposure and sexual harassment.

What? Yes. To the likes of Goldie Hawn. What? And Grace Kelly. Again, one of the most. Yeah. This is a theme park I went to when I was five.

And now I'm like, Al Cap showed himself to Goldie, which is like, what? Look what it leads to. The innocent things of your childhood. These things are now encroaching on the last little bit of memory I have of this nice time.

We brought you here to ruin your memories. Even this sucks. You going on Earthqu magoon's brain rattler was problematic yeah your blood's on your hands as much as anybody yeah and then richard nixon shows up richard nixon and spiro agnew uh trying to convince him to uh al cap to run for senator of in massachusetts against ted kennedy and then uh suppose seymour hirsch uh new yorker uh journalist seymour hirsch reported that um there are tapes of nixon talking about al cap in the oval office and one of the sexual harassment cases like it's going to be bad if we're associated

with him because he was friendly with the white house oh my god oh geez the time when that was true yeah you had to disavow sexual harassment you had to disavow uh we can't touch that guy there was also an event where he uh was it goes and goes and facts number horrible fact number 89 about did you know this about al cap it's like it's gonna be like like the uh what was it goes and goes and facts number horrible fact number 89 about did you know this about al cap it's like it's gonna be like like the uh was it the poet the poetry almanac on npr where it's just there's just two minutes of this every every evening on npr we're gonna have to make this a regular feature in four episodes from now a new al cap fact did you know did you know uh that at least four college students uh accused him of

harassment and uh there was pretty like you know incontrovertible proof of this and so he was backed into a corner and unlike a lot of people he was punished for what he did he was he had to pay a fine of five hundred dollars justice was brought wait this was when he was already famous yeah yeah yeah this is like a year before hansie lennon yeah yeah when he was already famous. Yeah. This was like a year before the Lenin. Yeah, yeah. Okay. He was like, don't protest, but come over here. Right. And then, yeah, like that's super duplicitous.

Maybe if you relaxed a little more. You wouldn't have all that angry energy. I was just sexually harassing college students, but it's like, don't go outside and hold a sign. Because you don't know anything about Vietnam. It also feels like today like the weird double like yeah it's like i hate this cartoon but i hit my kids until they bleed right and it's like oh and that's good and it's like okay and then like oh you then you go to a priest

because you're concerned about this and he's like i think i'd agree that that's good yeah listens need to be learned. He was interviewed or something, and somebody asked him about the harassment of colleges, and he goes, you know those college dames or something? Oh my God. He wasn't even really... So the college dames and the protesters. But he also, he was infuriated by the colleges, but then he went to all the colleges to speak.

Well, he, it's like the people now, the like... Milo's. Yeah, Milo Bench. Exactly. This is, again, it's exactly like now. I'll take their money, those idiots. I'll grab them inappropriately. He was just going to be a pain in the ass.

Just go and be a pain in the ass. And then in his comic strips, he would do things like parody Senator Ted Kennedy with the character Senator O'Noble McJester Wow That's funny I mean that's funny right there. This is a good point to say that this comic strip seems to be incomprehensible

Incomprehensible. Nobody's reading this for fun today I don't think Was this a daily or like a weekly? Seven days a week Black and white and color Sunday Yeah this for fun today i don't think was this a daily or like a weekly like seven days a week seven days a week black and white and color sunday on sunday yeah yeah um also by the end was checked out had a lot of assistance including uh the painter frank franzetta the guy my god yes the sign yes the man crazy he he became famous for painting uh book covers of like conan and tarzan and

incredible fantasy art yes set the standard for what we covers of Conan and Tarzan. It's incredible fantasy art. Yeah, set the standard for what we think of the visual language of fantasy. Like proto, like Schwarzenegger was able to step into that kind of painting style. Oh, that set the vision of this is what the film needs to be. Yeah, yeah. Wow. Like the tooth necklace, you know what I mean? Came out of his invention?

I mean, all that stuff. Whoa. Very male oriented where it's like the Star Wars poster. you know what i mean came out of his i mean all that invention yeah very and like very very male oriented where like it's the like the star wars poster where luke has the lights it's very reminiscent of that kind of pose which doesn't feel like the movie exactly no it's kind of a different slam this is also fantasy you're kind of fantasy al cap type fantasy i just saw a star wars poster where like the whatever whatever luke and leo were unrecognizable like there's like big fucking scandinavians like who are these characters i've never seen these characters a lot of that art and even like ralph mccorry art originally like

it's like makes it look like a much sexier movie i have this is i mean i'll admit this i have in my office i have the the statue of his like original stormtrooper where it had a shield and a lightsaber every stormtrooper was gonna like that was a conception that every stormtrooper would have a lightsaber and it does look like very sophisticated like robert heinlein type yeah that's yeah that book is all the art yes that's c-3po that's a that's C 3 PO that's yeah that's Macquarie Oh gotcha huh huh so born in holler really all of this stuff I also do all right just could just quick rundown of things he was hit by a trolley at age nine and lost his leg.

So if he's bitter. Yeah. Yeah. All this like sexually harassing people with the one leg. One legged sexual harasser conservative who confronted John Lennon. We need to rewrite his like main bio on his Wikipedia. So basically Dogpatch is the least interesting fact about him. Yes. It's like way down on the list.

Dogpatch list very interesting but his relationship to dog patch is like that's a blip in his well vivid life so much so that it did not even make it into his obituary when he died it wasn't even mentioned that's how much dog patch was not even like that had fallen in cultural relevance right uh that he was yeah that you would think you would mention like you know he has a theme park like that had fallen in cultural relevance right uh that he was yeah that you would think you would mention like you know he has a theme park like that'll probably be in dolly parton's obituary that she has a dolly would but she's been there more than

once which i'm not sure outcap did if outcap was like at the opening of all the rides and stuff yeah we have to we have to see if he went did he go he went to the groundbreaking and then the grand opening i don't know how many times after that and his son was the like a pr guy for at least a little while early on and he there's you get my boy a job that's what that sounds like

can you get him a job at the place loser something to do just throw him at the park you'll figure it out call dog patch don't look him up i'm a little bastard um i there's footage of him i found a piece of in that documentary it is but i think it's called life and times of dog patch there's you can watch him it's like okay so shot zooms out of a woman chasing a man out of a bar or something right like screaming at him which who knows what that was did they get into a tussle what was it but like just screaming hillbillies come tearing out of a bar and then alka and it reveals al cap who says oh boy it looks like another typical terrifying day in dog patch even worse than it is in my comic wow the pleasant world of dog patch do you want the harrowing version of dog

patch where it's like we're gonna do an update of dog patch but it's gonna be dark no it's gonna be like dark okay like the cw's dog perch watch this honestly dog patch we're gonna make it scary it's yeah yeah that's a viable enough uh um okay well we're i i mean we could list uh outcap things all day but i think it's also good to say he well okay so he invented the phrases hogwash whoa and and double whammy what he thought of these were like little turns of phrase okay uh uh which those are a little that speaks to his interesting writing that he coined these terms. And he also invented the idea of Sadie Hawkins day when, this podcast is going to be me being surprised. Every time you talk to her,

I'm like, are you kidding me? Like I'm the guy in the car. Like I might as well just be listening to this going, whoa. And then I tell it to my wife later, like, man,

it's Sadie Hawkins. Sadie Hawkins was a character. Was a character in the comic strip yeah and you know now sadie hawkins my wife's a high school teacher very problem oh yeah very problematic yes right right because it was that sadie hawkins dances when the girl asks the boy which is not how it's usually done the boy usually asks the girl yes and they don't call him that anymore and i think they'd be like getting away from the kind of gendered practice. Yeah. We had a turnabout in my high school. Ours was called Snowball.

Interesting. Because it was in December for some reason. We didn't have it. It was like a Christmas dance. We didn't do that. They're like, no dances. It was the only one that I went to because I wasn't brave enough to ask girls. I did get asked.

But then you were immediately asked. I mean, that's got to be great validation. I was asked, but it was like a weird, she was trying to get somebody else off of her tail. So like, she was like actually trying to like chase another guy away. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I bought, I didn't know how this stuff worked because I didn't go to, this is the only dance I went to in high school.

So I bought her the hugest just wrist consuming corsage that's the wrist corsage because you didn't want to go near her body no that's extremely I did the same thing I was like wrist wrist all the way felt safe to you sure sure but then it's but then it was like hideous I don't think she even I think I gave

her the option like you don't have to wear it and she's like you just put it in the seat yeah it just sat at the just tables back there where and we'd barely hung out during the night oh she just take off uh yeah yeah yeah no we barely she was with her friends and i was with mine and it was all it was i was a political pawn i hate vice versa day abolish it wrist corsages are prom only yeah for the others uh flowers from the gas station will suffice. Well, now I know. For the next high school dance, I go to. For underclassmen formals, that was my go-to.

I was 14, 15. That was the money I had. Gas station flowers? Yeah, a gas station has flowers. What in the hell can you walk into and be like, I'll take the flowers over there. I mean, in Dogpatch, maybe. What dogpatch situation were you in? Can you walk into it and be like, I'll take the flowers over there. I mean, in dog patch, maybe. It's now, what dog patch?

Can I have some of those? Backwoods dog patch situation. Where are you in? I got flowers for a formal at a gas station. What? U.S. oil and florist. It was just a little gas station. We got fresh roses and hot fries.

Gas station flowers. Hot fries. We got hot fries. Flower hot fries. We got hot fries. We got carnations. What do you want? We got coffee, but it's like four days old. We got unfil We got carnations What do you want We got coffee but it's like four days old

We got unfiltered And a weird drink Wait wait wait So like they were big full like roses It was just like a ten dollar thing of roses Where would the girl put them while the dance was happening Put it on the bleachers At the end of the night

Do you have the dinner at the prom Put it on the bleachers. Yeah, at the end of the night. You sleep at your dinner table, right? Like, do you have the dinner at the prom? No, it was just a... No, it was just in the gym. I'll just go right to the dance. It was just the gym. You just drop them. I think I always just drop them in the parking lot on the way in.

Yeah, it was... Here's what I think of these. I probably was like, oh, I think this is what you're supposed to do because I've seen it on television. So you were... I feel like my mom just took over in that instance. I don't think I was actually...

She was just like, I'm going to Jewel and getting you the thing. I feel like that happened. Yeah, exactly. It was a grocery store. Yeah. You go get it out of the, yes. But you were entrusted to go and find flowers. I think I just called the, I was like, oh, let's just stop. I'll

get some flowers. You were calling the shots. I think, yeah, I was usually calling shots. Mom, stop here. And you weren't driving. Because a gas station for flowers makes sense if you're like, on the way, gas up i'll grab the flowers i'm gonna go back in the back seat i didn't get like mom no no mom i gotta go i gotta go buy my old lady they're wilted from the unleaded like the fumes yeah these are beautiful they only where'd you get these they got a good 15 minutes in them when they get delivered and then yeah i don't know that that many people were bringing

but this is for like freshman sophomore formal i don't know that that may be well i think like me thinking ahead was above and beyond i don't know that that many people even brought flowers because it's such just a rinky dink We just dressed a little nicer You didn't have to do it I didn't have to do it but I was like I guess this is what you do So you should be applauded For the gas station flowers Were you wearing a shirt and tie for the dances?

And a coat yeah whatever suit I owned At the time That's a lot nicer than what you were in high school But still just in the gym No I know that. I'm just saying. You just said like we didn't wear that. We didn't get that fancy dress.

Oh, it was nicer than what I wore. Yeah, I was wondering if you all thought it was like polo shirts. In a holler. Whatever, yeah, whatever department store. Well, look, we got to go back to 30 more Al Cap facts real quick. If you got gas station flowers, tweet at us. My mind is already tweeted about al cap jason's trying to steal the focus from al cap with uh things from his life uh uh just to just to run through

it really fast sadie hawkins day was a problem at the time because in the real story in the comic sadie was quote the homeliest gal in all the hills that's why they changed the name okay okay sure oh okay so that's known the people don't want to remember like that's vaguely it's like the name doesn't it's the yeah kind of connotes like a wallflower if you look at the sadie hawkins from the comic she's basically a female alfred e newman oh my god very grotesque and her father is basically like bribing men to ask her out because he's worried yes that she's going to suffer the worst humiliation a woman could ever experience being an old maid because she is 35. 35. This happens in It's a Wonderful Life, too.

That was the bad thing that happens to Mary is that Donna Reed is that George never existed. So, Mary becomes an old maid and she's walking out of the library dressed in black with heavy wind. Yeah. And she's holding her coat closed and you're like wow i think like that's one of the things where he's like oh my god mary you know like that's a big thing yeah clarence is like she's at the library look at her she's learning instead of fucking there's the i said there's this this song from the little Abner stage musical that was made into a movie called I'm Past My Prime. And the joke is this 18-year-old girl is past her prime and she's a very attractive woman.

No. I think it's still sort of a joke, played for a joke. But still, it seems to be a common, obviously it was a thing in the culture at the time. Did we all need a cigarette break or something? Stressful episode. What a legacy. He kicked it right in 77. He didn't feel any of this.

We're carrying none of the backlash. We all are carrying his burden with us. Where we live in the world. He left a lot of damage in his wake. The hole he dug. Get out of that Al Cap hole. Everyone's talking about too many franchises

remaking the same thing. I looked at IMDB, there are four different Lul Abner projects listed over the span of, no, not now. Fox has got one, Paramount,

co-financed with Universal. Torn between Disney and Sony. Well, Disney just said Sony couldn't use Lul Abner. Lul Abner can't be in the Avengers anymore. He's out of the MCU. There's a 67,

there's a 71, there's a 1940, and there's a 60... 59. Oh my god. Various media. Every era. And a Broadway show. And a Broadway show. Ran for three years, I believe. And then M show. Ran for three years, I believe.

And then MGM Musical. Like the golden age of MGM Musical. It's the Lil Abner. Is that the highest production value one? Yeah, that's the one. Hold on. Lil Abner comes alive, 1959. Okay.

So like way before Franklin. As that stuff's dying out. Where it's like, look! Technicolor. Yes. And Martin Scorsese is like fuck this we're getting gritty there's yeah no more 90 dancers on an obvious soundstage i'm gonna do something shoot on location i'm gonna shoot in a real house you're out of your fucking mind get

out of here i'm gonna wear a gun shoot in a dangerous new york do that. If you in 71, it looks like there was like a hee haw type show with the characters. Oh, I think that was the TV pilot that they aired as a TV special. Right. I saw that. Yeah, that didn't. Yes.

And that, well, didn't they make a TV pilot? Dog patch was like, Oh, there's going to be a TV show. And then the pilot didn't go. There was going to be a restaurant.

There was a TV pilot. Yeah. And then both didn't happen and dog patch suffered the consequences right yeah there was an unsold little abner pilot in 67 oh that was 60 they were trying they were throwing everything every every room every week we want to do something little abner we not been down this road which one is that little Little Abner, you know. He's a big guy.

It's not a cute little child. No, no, it's a big guy. Big strapping guy. That's funny. Yeah, Sadie Hawkins. Hilarious. Ugly as shit. An ugly girl.

That would be hilarious. As an 18-year-old, nobody would be interested in. Movie of the week? Broadway play. What do you want to do? Theme park. Radio jingle? After this podcast comes

out that is the conversation we'll all be hearing in rooms across the town i know it's just we'll all be taking this will kickstart me yeah we'll be competing yeah right comics are on little abner next week scott's going in the week after it's after labor day though so i think i have it comic strips are like little comic books. Some might even call them quick bites of comic books. And I think there's a new it's called Quibi, folks. Is it Quibi?

I thought it was Quibi. It's not Kibby. No, I don't think so. I don't mean to make fun of we're probably all working for a Quibi. We'll all be working there. I was in the building. It's like, you think this is a Quibi thing? And I'm like, I don't know

what that is. I was there. I don't know. I'm sorry. They're going to bring us out and set a general and be like, we heard your podcast. That was funny. We're doing a little admin show. You guys are out.

I did just take it it I was at a general At Quibi yesterday And the guy asked me No questions Oh no 100% Just like So yeah

Here's the thing Here's what Quibi's looking for And here's kind of You know That's kind of the Quibi ethos And anyway Look I gotta run I gotta meet up with

Wayne Brady Yeah pretty much His office is gonna be closed In six months There's gonna be a phone On the floor You gotta get out of here You gotta get some

We're gonna rip through this thing Now they're really Not gonna take me Well now i already had my general what else is gonna happen but if you go in and say these blinds aren't even ours you can work in the phrase kickapoo joy juice yes that's the moonshine from the caves that's right yeah and i guess you could have this at the park i think uh yeah so in the one important thing to know is that in the world of dog patch you could drink kickapoo joy juice a liquor of stupefying potency uh uh the recipe for kickapoo joy juice is so you know it's a bunch of uh you know it's i mean it's

liquors and stuff and gasoline and whatever but then weird grizzly you gotta soak a grizzly bear in it or a panther or a horseshoe or an anvil a lot of backwoodsy shit what is it was it alcoholic in the park i don't know right right not sure couldn't have been back then it's like the blue milk and galaxy's edge or butterbeer and what's better blue or milk kick i'm sorry blue or milk kickapoo or kickapoo milk that sounds bad um it all sounds bad. They had a... I don't think... I mean, I don't... That might have been why my dad was like, let's go to Dogpatch.

He was getting nothing on 3-Eleven. Just like, we can swing by Dogpatch, do a couple hours. Just 15 minutes of Dogpatch. I'm seeing my father in a couple of minutes. I might as well. I'm going to need a lot of Kinkaboo Joy Juice. I'm going to be a Kinkaboo Joy Juice. Why don't you take him over to the trout pond?

Yeah, go do paddle boats. Hang on. Just a couple more joy juices. I'm going to finish this. Let me finish this off. Then we'll get back in the car and drive another hour. I was fishing for a trout and then I reeled it in and it was my dad. My dad is face down in the paddle boat.

I do remember fishing at the trout pond catching it taking it to the place where they clean it fry it and i ate it wow that was crazy that was like my lunch that you caught that was at dog patch wow yeah which seems like that's a thing i think there was this was a trout farm initially this property so that was like a thing yeah i mean you could have fished for trout but it wouldn't have been as like codified and as much of a process but i did catch a trout right and eat it um this is like if you could catch a like a trout in like a little mermaid ride or something or you could get like a flounder and eat it or that would be too morose but i mean like you know what i'm saying like you could live in the universe from that big fish bucket the fish net at california

adventure right if you photo op if you got to kill the ronto you ate at the ronto roaster at galaxy's edge yes before you ate it and then oh yeah baby although i guess it's not real so this is actually you would kill something and eat it i did yeah i was too young to realize like this is disturbing but it was like now we'll eat the fish and i was like oh yeah sure fish would you fish now would you like take your take your boys to fish catch and release uh sure yeah yeah that's the one catch and release i'm sure they'll be bored out of their minds but i have i've thought about it you know because we live i live outside la so it's like there's some fishing areas lake arrowhead oh yeah yeah i'll be bored but you want to do that dad thing be like i want to live that beer commercial yeah like the outdoors stuff yeah they're gonna get their

hands dirty brow commercial all right son you know like that i don't know i think it could be cool probably do it once yeah just get a photo out of it and then everyone will lose the memory of them like throwing temper tantrums and trying to jump out. Speaking of different times, I saw a commercial on TV. Well, it was on YouTube, but I was watching 80s commercials, early 80s commercials. There was a national spot for a fishing rod, like the reel. Wow. for a fishing rod like the reel wow and it was it was uh uh uh oh god there's a name of a fishing reel company it's probably still around but they had enough money to do a national that that could

play everywhere the slogan for the company was the folks you fish with whoa the folks you fish with that is very good yeah you might on like super syndicated like the you know for grandma antenna tv but serious cash might have been like a big regional spot but still sure but like yeah like on a less like a more obscure cable network you'll see commercials like that it's like clearly a non-union commercial and it's like it's there's like mattress companies that that sell and it's like you can just tell there's like a you can tell this may be a cheaper spot and then you'll still see like sometimes standard

deaf commercials on certain stations yeah like okay we filmed our ad in 2002 our work is done right and it's probably honestly like just working fine I have it on my phone I have a ringtone on my phone really

it's a ringtone that I have not selected. And it would say what if you selected it? Do you want me to turn it on? Yeah, sure. Yeah, let's hear it. I gotta make sure I get the right one because they're all labeled CBS commercials. This podcast, we're doing a whole... Zipco. Oh. Zipco Mega 33XPL

Smooth, powerful, ball-bearing drive. Ultra-sensitive drag. And an interchangeable handle for right or left hand retrieve the Zepco Omega 33 XBL just one of the Zepco Omegas made in America by Zepco

the folks you fish with the folks you fucking fish with so much weird dead air in there whoa isn't that great the Omega 3 the Omega 33 wow the Zepco Omega 33 The folks you fucking fish with. Wow. So much weird dead air in there. Whoa. Isn't that great? The Omega 3. The Omega 33.

Wow. Omega 33. For right hand or left hand retrieve. Wow. Okay. Enough people in Boston are going to buy a fishing pole. I think I fish twice in my life. As a young child. I did a little bit and i'd go to a place it was probably like just the trout farm version of what your uh of your dog patch

experience it was called trout dale it's still there in uh like agura hills and it's similar to this like a pond with so many trout as many as possible there's a trout pond up on mount baldy you're where we live oh yeah like there's a and i fished a lot i had my own rod and reel i had a i had a tackle box is that what it's called yeah yeah tackle box i have my own tackle box two of the places that i used to fish though have been kind of destroyed where one is dog patch and then i went fishing with a buddy of mine we went camping and then that place subsequently like all of it burned down in a wildfire wow it's a little freaky oh and all of it talk about

wishes it was burnt down would have been on the liquor driving by and it's like find a match i can't do this anymore get Get some gasoline. Some flowers. Jason is a child. I know this. I mentioned it before. Has a story that sounds like something out of Dogpatch. When he would fish, he would fish for pond eels. Pond eels.

So in the little resort kind of trailer park where my family's had a trailer for years like a little in ground uh trailer down at the jersey shore there's a small lake that is connected to a pond by marsh and we would go back to this pond and fish with either like chunks of cheese or like cut up hot dogs okay yeah yeah you catch these little guppies you catch these little goldfish and then one year for whatever reason we just started catching eels with sharp cheddar these eels love this cheese and we're like what is that and so how big were the eels maybe like um a little under a foot i would say that's not that's sizable man no that's a sizable eel friendly looking creatures oh they look evil yeah did earthquake magoon give you this idea scrambled brain uh uh that's the kind of thing that my dad thinks modern restaurants are like

i get eel and cheddar you got out you out there in california eating your eel even though he's from here that's what he's from yes yeah he's your eel. Even though he's from here. That's what he's from. Yeah, he's from Sherman Oaks. That's right. Anything that's not meatloaf, he's suspicious of. What is that? What are you eating over there? He recently bragged to me, I've been trying new things.

I tried flatbread. Flatbread? Yeah. Wow. Yeah, he gave flatbread. I'm like, that's pizza. My dad will not. Yeah, my dad is the same way.

My dad retired out here, but he won't eat anything. That makes a little more sense. Yeah, and he's from Chicago, but that's all meat. It's just he grew up where the cow stopped and he moved to where they started. You know what I mean? I got a great picture of my dad and I at Dogpatch.

I should have brought it. Oh, yeah. He's in the mid-80s, early 80s, right? So, I'm a little kid and he's holding my hand and we're both looking back at something and my mom just happened to be behind us and snapped a picture. We're walking through like the food area, I guess where that stuff was. But he's turned around, he's got the great like Serengeti sunglasses, mustache, sleeveless shirt, short shorts and for some reason his ass is soaking wet

in the photo we probably were just on the paddle boats yeah it's also the arkansas heat but it's soaking wet shorts sounds like a nice idyllic photo besides those details photo you know he's like holding my hand he didn't get like, his butt wasn't on fire and he jumped into a barrel of water. Is that possible? That's an experience they offer. Another crazy day at Dogpatch. Worse than my comic. This guy's ass caught on fire.

Your dad's chasing some woman. Vietnam was right. Wow. Well, so, I mean, we should start moving to the the park at last we're only 15 minutes into the more about lil abner there was a comprehensive reprinting of them going on by uh idw their line the library of american comics there's nine volumes so far idw's put out nine volumes nine volumes little abner ran for 43 years oh my god so did it start uh 34 i think yeah so uh it'll be a little while they banged out nancy in three or four volumes they put out nine volumes so they must be selling well i guess yeah like those big

books sell well for the yeah comic book imprints they're great i hope i don't even little amra i guess if i bought this for my dad and he's like oh good the way things used to be oh no my dad like sherman oaks yeah i can't imagine but i would if i bought it for my dad i'd probably like try to do the really like thoughtful son gift of like like the theme like the theme park we used to go to like dog patch. He'd be like, was that what it's called? Was it dog patch?

Is that on the way up to Illinois? No, that was in Arkansas. Oh, don't remember. Cool. Thank you, buddy.

Just get him some short shorts and get them wet. And here's some wet shorts for you to put on. You put them on. Happy Father's Day. Put them on. I need to do the photo Hold my hand Hold my hand, take the photo His ass isn't wet enough

Wet him down So All of that insanity About this one-legged sexual harasser To say That a group of people There was a trout farm owner who wanted to do something different with the property and see if he could turn it into more of a tourist attraction

especially considering considering that there were several caves worthy of exploring uh how can we get people off the highway this isn't near an interstate you got to go out of your way to go there what can we do what if we built a little village they talked about properties they might be able to turn it into and they talked about turning it into dog patch from the Labner. And they assure I just like after all that reading the quote that like they assured Al Cap that the park would be quiet and dignified and would not include roller coasters or thrill rides that would conflict with the rest of the Labner. Yeah, we don't want those rides working everywhere else. But ours is going to be different it's just not dignified not like disneyland so this guy was super buttoned up

but also an entrepreneur like a true american pull yourself up by your bootstraps i have a trap farm i'm gonna dream bigger yeah i mean it's pretty impressive that he thought to i mean i i of there's i have not great things to say about many of the other owners of this property. But that guy probably did well. Yeah, I think so. That's a legacy. Albert Rainey is the name, and his real estate agent, O.J. Snow. O.J. Snow.

O.J. Snow. Sounds like a character in Little Abner. From out of town. And a smart selection for, it was estimated that every day, lil abner reached 60 million americans 900 american newspapers and 100 uh foreign papers wow 60 million people or 60 million readers excuse me so therefore we could set our we could get to our goal easily of 10 000 people a day this is what they wanted as the years went on it was a very rare they said in a very special day they could maybe get 7 000 like it always fell way short of a place man you're like i didn't know that as a kid it was like you're driving

through arkansas for a while back then and it's very green i don't know if you guys have been to arkansas never not okay it's very green like because it's just a lot of moisture i guess like and and so you're just driving but it's like uh there are a lot of tall very green trees like so it's almost like virginia you know what i mean but like very leafy right and you're just going down that highway forever and it's not pretty but like it's nondescript like you get but like very leafy right and you're just going down that highway forever and it's not off the main like it's nondescript like you get but like you enjoy a scenic drive for 15 minutes but it starts to get like i don't remember being yes scenic because there's nothing to really look out on you know what i mean and then just i remember i remember looking out the window and you're just looking at trees trees trees and i'm looking at it for an hour or whatever it is waiting for the

dog patch sign to pop out out of nowhere like oh you know what i mean like there it is and there's not even a side saying dog patch coming up just like oh there probably was but i was like you know i couldn't i just knew the big i knew the guy you're right he had i knew little abner he had the oh there's a big little abner on the sign or yes so i'd be like that wow so there's like it's like an oasis to you and sort of a boring long road right like seven hours away from dallas or something it was a while you know what i mean it was it wasn't great i'm trying to my my grandfather retired in is it bentonville bensonville bentonville or bensonville okay it's where sam walton's from okay oh

sure that sam walt so like he lived there from the waltons not a character but the walton family is from this town in arkansas their headquarters is there oh gotcha so but it was a small town and did you like visiting wherever that the main place where your grandparents were i liked my grandparents house because it was when they had a house they actually did not were not able to keep the house which was sad and then they moved to southern illinois okay but uh yeah my grandfather had a garden and there were all these like stories of sam walton and how he he would go to church and he would sit in the front pew and then he would fall asleep and snore very loudly but no one wanted to wake him up because

he gave so much money to the community and to the church. So he would just snore through the homily or the you know. That's just old Sam. Old Sam over there. Yeah. Well, you know, I mean maybe that maybe they, I guess they had a lot of affection for him or were they just scared of him?

I think both. Probably both. Don't take the money away. Write down the name of the man who told me not to snore. He will kill this town. I'm going to burn this church down. Build a Walmart. I don't care about Arkansas. You're all bonds to me.

Did you have affection for the little Abner character at all? I think I remember vaguely that sign. I think visually, on a cerebral cortex level, when I look at the cast of characters, the sheer number, that one hits a button in my cerebral cortex. It's like, boom. And I'm like, oh, it's an exciting... I like that character. I like the way it looks.

If you go fun, you maybe don't know anything else about it. Fine, we're going to have fun now. We're not in the car. Sure. It reminds you of getting out of a car. Yeah, exactly. I'm going to get probably a toy or a prize or both or a trout. we're not in the car sure yeah that's fine getting out of a car yeah yeah exactly i'm like i'm gonna get like probably a toy or a prize or both or a trout trout's coming yeah let's eat some delicious

trout again trout good i'm gonna kill my own food i don't know i haven't had trout in a long time yeah the trout isn't a thing you have fish it's like usually on the specials we have a trout like a diner yeah i guess a diner trout scott i kind of want to go to this trout land place yeah can we do an episode about trout yeah yeah my old fishing hole the one will they scale it for you uh i think so oh at trout dale i have no idea dog patch you would give that the fish to them and they would take it into the cabin and i do the deed that was like one of their big trademark things i read they would also it into the cabin and do the deed that was like a big one of their trademark things i read they would also put it on ice for you if you want to take

it home oh okay that makes sense so like they'll do whatever grandpa trout um look i did this i killed him i killed him grandpa this for you give this to sam walton leaving a dead fish on Sam Walton's doorstep you or is an offering in America my ass please give me a job I brought you a job now do you have any fondness for the character who is the centerpiece of the town of

dog patch there is an oversized statue of the hero all of the townsfolk worship. He is a Confederate general, and his name is Jubilation T. Cornpone. I gotta look at a picture of him. Please look up

Jubilation T. Cornpone. If I look at a picture of him, I'll probably remember, but I have no recollection of this. I think it was sort of the centerpiece. Julius T. Cornpone? Cornpone. Jubilation T. Cornpone? Cornpone. Jubilation T. Cornpone? Jubilation, sorry. Can I?

It'd be Jubilation. Real quick, while you're looking it up, I forgot to play this. This is a list of all the characters that are listed in the trailer. Did you watch this? No. A little Abbey original trailer. This will help us get acquainted with who we're going to meet. Yeah, exactly. Okay, thank you.

Here we go. Glossary. Oh! Earthquake Magoo. Moonbeam McSwine. Them low and evil scrag. Evil Eye Pleagle. Glossary. Oh! Earthquake Magoo. Moonbeam McSwine. Them low and evil scrag. Evil Eye Flegal. Available Joan.

And get a load of gorgeous Julie Newmar as stupefying Julie. Julie Newmar? What? What does it do? Sensational Stella Stevens as a passionato von Climax. General Bull Moose's sexy secretary. Yeah, buddy. Does that mean you get bed and board?

Extremely. But you ain't seen nothing till you see the wildest Sadie Hawkins day of all. Oh, no. See the laughter and the fear-crazed bachelors flee from Daisy Mae and those beautiful love-starved babes. This is a real glimpse. All the carrying on in Paramount's biggest musical hit. This is a real glimpse.

Say it. Come on. Say it. No, it's on the screen. Announcer doesn't say the title. He doesn't say the title. He said everything else. He said so many words.

That's right. It was a Paramount musical. There we go. it's not a phrase you hear often yeah paramount music oh yeah not known for those paramount available jones i like these names uh uh really quick i don't want to sidetrack but um the last when i flew back from my first visit to orlando into disney world and I wept and wept harder than I've ever cried about anything else in my life. I was so sad to leave Disney World.

And the only thing that cheered me up and got me to stop crying for a second was that my parents pointed out that Julie Newmar was getting on the plane. Oh, wow. Really? Specific memory. Yeah, that's Catwoman.

Catwoman's on the flight. Now, please stop crying for five fucking seconds. And that did work. It did work, but I never stopped thinking about that trip for the rest of my life, and here I am now. So really, the tears never stopped. Julie Newmar was powerless.

In the face of Disney World, no. I don't really remember the statue, but I do remember some I remember the beard. Because I pictured something with like a coonskin cap. But I remember the beard but i do remember some some i i remember the beard okay because i pictured something with a like a coonskin cap uh-huh but i but i remember the beard he's more of uh he's yeah he's in the hat and the the yeah he is a this is a confederate statue is what we're talking about yes however however i think it actually moved to branson or something oh like silver dollar city which i've also been to oh really, really? We've never gotten into Silver Dollar City, which seems like a better version of this.

Right, but with less rides. Oh, really? Huh, huh. I didn't like it as much. Oh, huh. Interesting. Well, America felt otherwise. Because it did well.

I was a dog patch guy. And also an hour away, yeah, Branson, Missouri, the rising fortunes of Branson. Hey, Branson's very popular. Yeah. Branson, Missouri, the rising fortunes of Branson. Hey, Branson's very popular. Which, I mean, like, it's... What I didn't know is that Branson wasn't really, like, hitting stride until the 90s. And that contributed to the, you know, the final nail in the coffin of Dogpatch USA.

Yeah, it was like a better attraction down the road. Jubilation T. Cornpone, though this is a Confederate statue, it is sort of, it was kind of satire. It was like all the townsfolk sung about this guy who was clearly a drunk and an idiot and lost all of these battles. And I watched a song, the song from the movie about Jubilation T. Cornpone, and it's sung by Stubby K, old character actor Stubby K. And why did I get into any of this? Well, so somebody there was an article that the deepest, like weird, worst right wing thing ever that tried to do a gotcha of Bill Maher via jubilation to corn pone. Because there is not even a like overtime, the extra of real time. People are several guests are talking about, weird actors they're related to.

And he says, Vilmar says, Stubby K is my second cousin. Oh, interesting. And then this article says, well, did you hear that? Well, you know, he goes off about the Confederate statues and how he thinks they should be pulled down. But his cousin did a whole song about him. Okay. Yeah. A lot of context there.

Yeah. There's a ton to learn. A lot of context. yeah there's a ton of context do you imagine being that petty and sad desperate to bring down you're just like i'm gonna go for this obscure little abner character not even little abner i'm gonna go for jubilation t the never seen and that's who i'm gonna get a civil war who is a racist who if you watch the video it is a whole song about how confederate generals were idiots so it's a gotcha of himself but

I don't and also to go to take all the time to go after Bill Maher who is unassailable and perfect in every way you're talking about a guy that's bulletproof yeah yeah shouldn't have tried so but I really like that name all of these names what was the name available jones available jones yeah so good i thought it was

available jones that seems like it went in stride with the rest of the trailer though because it was just like women chase the men yes in this colorful male fantasy Boy crazy and the men are running for their lives in this dance sequence. Two ugly women are begging for some friendship. But we're not going to give it to them. We're just going to make fun of them. Julie Newmar was his like stupefying Jones. Stupefying Jones. She comes out of like a rocket looking thing.

Yeah, she comes out of a rocket and she's wearing a bathing suit. Oh my God. Whoa. I think we're going to a rocket looking. Yeah. She comes out of a rocket and she's wearing a bathing suit. Oh my God. Whoa. I think we can watch this movie. Honestly, I was like, I should probably watch this. The Jubilation Tea Corn Pud song is good. It is funny. There are jokes.

It's a lot of fun. I've heard that and I don't know why I've heard that before. And I'm trying to remember what context it is that I've heard it in. I don't know. I don't know. It's like sampled in a girl talk song or something. Maybe. That's Stubby K right there.

It's a mix of like MGMT and Stubby K. So let me say something about, something I learned from the documentary about Dogpatch. Dogpatch, upon opening was 1700 acres uh we were just talking about acreage because uh universal studios is opening a a new the third gate in florida uh and uh it's gonna be massive clearly and it is it's 750 acres that's pretty big animal kingdom the biggest park in disney world 580 acres so dog pet usa was three animal kingdoms in one that's insane it's really insane an animal kingdom had a room for like a it's a full zoo there's that so there's a place

for yeah but then you get savannah for elephants to run around why does dog patch have it's really insane um it's just wild land you know that's just go off it's not just like you're just in the ozarks you could just live there probably for 30 days before you're dead there's a guy out in the trees well you would get them you could bring them here you could get an annual pass if you just camped in the yard camped in the probably around february yeah i mean there was a lot of some of the cabins they like deconstructed somewhere else and rebuilt that's crazy to be the characters cabins real real 19th century cabins wow geez and and reassembled them. God, this is a genuinely historic site. But so what could you do there?

Here, when I throw it to you, like, what do you remember doing? You remember getting a toy. Yeah, were there games? Because I feel like probably. But the strongest memory I have is that I really wanted, there were two kind of dog toys, like plush dogs. And one was like pink and red and one was two shades of blue and I could not decide between them when I won this game and I was like freaking out like I could not decide between which dog I wanted because they were both so great

mm-hmm and I think my mom or dad like played the game again and like spent more money and won again. So then I got to have both. Wow. That's cool. You have nice memories here. Yeah, it's very nice. And there's a picture of my mom with both dogs.

Oh my God. We're coming out of a little like food cabin or whatever. Wow. Wow. And I was like, but it taught me that I could have everything i ever want you entitled hippie yeah exactly i'll capture this mixture around yeah i feel like that is a running theme in halton catch fire from what i've watched you can get everything you want all

you can have it all it's up to you when you stop dog patch the biggest influence on the series i think it's good big influence. A little Latin early pace. I mean, that would be a pretty good casting. He could be a live action. Oh, wow. Beef him up, put a little CrossFit on him. Give him the two by four. You gotta get those upper arms really just busting out.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have we determined who owns the characters now? Do we know? It has to be like some company in Mexico. You know what I mean? Yes. As a write down-down as like a tax like a super fun site you know what i mean like yeah like where it's toxic land and they just a massive media company buys it and writes it off yeah they're never gonna clean it up it's very yes it's because the characters are not public domain yet no but

that when it hits that hundred year mark this will be one of the first to go because nobody's being careful we just had to switch right it was what was the the year because we just the the sunny bono law just lapsed or it's over now so things are now entering public domain from oh 1924 on what's the sunny bono what was he he extended that he passed legislation the day it was like copyright at the behest of Disney because of Mickey Mouse. Yeah, right, right. He fought for Disney to hold back. That's his big piece

of legislation. And then he was mayor of Palm Springs. Yeah. And then it was like, because it extended in only like, what, I don't know,

10 years, 15 years, 20, because it was 100 years, I think. It gave like a good chunk of time to, but like, it's like, there was a moratorium

on stuff like after 24 or something and now every year there will be stuff entering the public domain which is the first time that's happened in a while i think i could be shocked i wonder what disney's i wonder what disney's plan is they have to be figuring something out i'm sure there's yeah i think under the original before all the extensions we had just passed either spider-man or mickey man like some big one like it was it was it was steamboat willie or something it was like yeah it was they were screwed spider-man's much later 62 oh 100 yeah okay yeah yeah yeah like superman and batman will get there much quicker oh man uh boy then you'll just have constant batmans and

spider-man can you imagine a world like? Where there's like a new one every week? It'll never happen. Multiple competing Jokers. Whoa. God, Trippie. My movie opens opposite the Joker, so no one's going to see it. It's the same week, really? Yes.

They were like, October 4th. Is there anything coming out? Oh, yes. That Joker film. Who's that? Joker? What's that about? It's my birthday.

I'll go see it. Okay, good. Just do the double feature. The movie see it okay good i'll just do a feature october 4th is both the release of the joker and the first uh wwe on fox and i'm like this is a weird birthday oh no yeah from la i'll drag you scott yeah i'll be there yes i'll see a matinee and then i'll go to the staples center i'm sure there'll be like one theater in stockton you know what i mean like the indie do you know yet have they told you no they're still putting together the theatrical but i got the whole vod thing which was pretty crazy oh interesting huh uh and you use the cabins from dog patch usa and the it's that's where it's all set it's set in dog patch it's if you're so great it's set in the holler there's a wounded criminal played by aaron paul he crawls into the holler and it's a deaf boy catches a trout he's playing his father is

available jones yes exactly and uh it gets real dark from there you had to cart a bunch of fake snow into arkansas it was crazy oh yeah we shot it there i like that no we shot it in winnipeg for dog patch we were yes there's snow on the. No, we shot it in Winnipeg for Dogpatch, Scott. We were, yes. There's snow on the mountains in the Ozarks. They had a ski lodge. Oh, that's right. Oh wait, that came up.

But it was difficult because they couldn't get snow regularly enough. Oh really? Because it was too hot? Yeah. They're like, let's do a ski lodge. Yeah, yeah. That'll turn it around. Well, okay.

So what else do we have there? I can name some names of things there were live shows at a place called the cornvention center uh there was a place called barney barn smells skunk works which was a bunch of rube goldberg machines that make soap yeah i remember a shooting game oh wait i think. I think I have that. Yeah. That might have been where I won the dogs. Oh, it could have been. Oh, that is like the film. This is one aspect of a Labnerverse.

I really like all the names. And this one's one of the best. Rotten Ralphies Ricochet Rifle Range. Oh, wow. Great. That's where you got your beloved. And like what? Yes.

I think that's what it was. Mm-hmm. Wow. Are you looking at the Wikipediaikipedia or is there a different lil abner wiki my own okay you found this is just on the wiki and they have uh trash eaters trash eaters it's amazing do you remember the thing about i don't remember this but i read about it where they suck the trash out of your hand they suck the trash they're all animals that eat your trash yep that is good yeah yeah suction machines uh innovators yeah the uh i'm

looking at the oh oh that's the one i'm really intrigued by and there's no i couldn't find a video of it well abner space rocket the ride was had in 1978 it was a simulated trip into outer space which means it was like a movie i guess i don't remember this at all yeah yeah maybe it was gone by the time i don't know who knows but why why is he going to space that's unclear yeah like it's really out of the but julie in the movie was in a rocket oh yeah so maybe there was more of a rocket the president like an alien presence in these books i think available jones might have been an inventor or scientist because he looks like a dweeb. Oh, right. He was a dweeb. You see all sorts of architect

archetypes show up. Right. There's a strip where like the managers of the best boxer and the best wrestler in New York are very nervous because Lil Abner has beaten up like a dozen men and a new TV camera happened to be

there. And they're like, what are we going to do? They're going to find out our clients aren't that strong. There's nothing compared to this guy. There's nothing compared to this corn pone man. Who's never, he's never been trained to fight. Yeah. He could kill him. Full of hillbilly rage.

He drinks enough of that kickapoo juice. Joy juice. To kill everybody in Madison Square Garden. Blind, drunk, and rage. How much would you give me if he killed not only the opposing boxer, but everyone in the stands? Here's what you're going to do. You're going to get wasted. Get him in three rounds.

And then you're going to start killing people in the front row. Punch everybody else. Work your way to the tent, to the mezzanine. And he was very happy-go-lucky, though, wasn't he? Happner? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

So it's funny that he also just like is extraordinarily violent yeah i'm a nice guy he's naive he's a wholesome he was an innocent that's the name of the word i kept coming across um an innocent an innocent unlike right of sexual harassment but 43 years of a comic strip they're going to space at some point. What's left? Space. Season seven of Halt, you would have gone to space. Yeah, we would have, yes. And then they all become astronauts.

Space is the next. Where else do you go? Oh, Mission Impossible 7 and 8 better do space. Oh, man. Please, Tom, do the training. Oh, it's really there. They've teased it. But I don't know if they got to do it.

They've teased space? Yes. I love that. I have not seen the last two oh they're great oh they're yeah um but yeah tom of course will have to go to space for real that's what they're saying like if we were to space they're not gonna fake it tom has to go to nasa and get trained that's what they're saying i don't know if that's what they're planning but feels like they should then he's got to climb out of the real center of the earth

yes dig his way up from the core. Like the core. The movie. Oh, yeah. It's a reverse core. Reverse core. He's buried in there. He's got to make his way up.

Stuck in the core. Reverse core. Mission Impossible 9, reverse core. Reverse core. Reverse core. The inertia kicks him into space when he emerges. And that's where, oh, yeah. So much force.

Oh, maybe he comes back from space. Yeah, space. He burrows into the, there we go. The key is getting back from space. It's not getting out of the core. It's getting back from space. He burrows into the... The key is getting back from space. It's not getting out of the core. It's getting back from space after the inertia of the explosion. Because he just free falls. He's not in a ship.

He's just without a helmet. He's got a minute to land on her. Sounds like this franchise. Yeah, he can do that. You would tell him that and he'd go, got it. Can do. I'm training. I and he'd go Got it I've already been training I actually was just Working on that already

Working with NASA as we speak I'll be there in four hours Working with Dubai's NASA Dubai's NASA NASD What else we got uh west polk chop special spelled west p o apostrophe k chop s p e s h u l miniature train with passenger cars carry guests on a circular track around the park. And it's of course using that bad dialect.

Mammy Yoakum, Lil Abner's mother, was always making poke chops for everyone. I see. Okay. So that was her train? She also had a train. Is the dog also called... But she retired. She liked to be at home.

Focus on pokeop, Megan. Well, because Pappy was a layabout. Like, Pappy, all the men were like good-for-nothing layabouts, it seemed like. So, was it weird? Like, was he saying all the men were lazy? Was that sort of what his... I think that's a common hillbilly trope is that... The women are the workers?

The women folk have to do... Yeah, they do everything and the men are like... It's like Wonder Woman a little bit. I guess there's no men on the island, but. But the women are also chasing the men around. Yeah. So the women are actually sort of sexually. When they're not sex crazed.

They're making food for everyone. And are the women like empowered in the story? Do we know? What do you think? I don't know about that. What you learned about Sadie Hawkins Day. They're empowered if they have a billionaire father. okay they're not good no there there was a strip where abner goes to meet uh something a person named the ultimate and he is a man who got rich by selling

ice he sold ice to all the rich people that's smart so 43 years you going to meet a rich ice guy at some point. It's like a Eugene O'Neill reference. This guy's amazing. They all talk him up and he shows up. He's just super depressive and an ice man. Just an old ice man. Oh, Pappy Yoakum has a ride. Pappy Yoakum's positively petrifying pup mobiles.

Okay. Those are go-karts. Then we got, okay, so this last name is spelled very strange and I looked, apparently you have to, it is a,

it's a raspberry to say it. So it's sort of a farty sound. So I guess you would say Joe Pfff's impending disaster machine is the name of the ride.

I'm going to put my kid on that you want to do joe what's the joe one that's it's 98 degrees 100 humidity every ride just scorching hot metal as soon as you get on it i think i vaguely remember the go-karts, but they blend together with go-karts. I would ride a lot in Dallas. Nah. Sure. Yeah.

Which itself, the track itself was abandoned for like 25 years. The Dallas go-kart? Yeah. You just had to find it off the freeway, but you could. Oh, weird. You take it back. And also all the track was overgrown with grass and stuff. So if you brought your own go-kart or got an old rusty one going again.

Yes, you could. Yeah, you could just get out there. Third curtain. And then we get to Earthquake Magoon's brain rattler, which seems very dangerous. It seems like it was probably a 48-incher, right? I couldn't have written on that one. Yeah, I'm sure I wasn't allowed on that one maybe for the best because it looks dangerous it's like a rusty red cage that you go up in a big spiral and then

there's some like very steep drops and hills it looks really unpleasant and it is now a lot of these rides got sold to a place called little America with a K jammed in there. And sort of a creepy Spike Lee fashion. Where is the Little America? Marshall, Wisconsin. Gosh, they really traveled. Yeah. These places, the cabins came from.

That whole road trip. Yeah. That's a movie. This is putting the Harry Nilsson into it. Everybody is talking about me they load up the brain rattler on a

flathead truck brain rattler's seen a lot of good years it's time to say goodbye I think the the I think

Woody's from Toy Story is making his way around to these rides now yeah next stop how can the

toys get lost it's a new way what is the ride in the pit in the video is that the brain rather that has like big giant cars on this twirling that's the brain rather right yeah where you're in the front the windshield is a cage yeah it looks like i'm surprised it hasn't didn't fall off very regularly it's's so oversized. It doesn't, it's bizarre looking. But we can ride it. We can ride it now. We could go on a renamed Earthquake Magoons.

That's amazing. Next time you're in Marshall, Wisconsin. That's amazing that you can just like, those rides last that long. Right. Yeah. It's like planes where you don't realize. We should go on a trip and ride all the rides

From Dogpatch The incredible This is where this podcast gets This is how we die Self-financed The four hour drive from Milwaukee Or Madison Oh wait I'm flying into milwaukee next week

wisconsin to visit my friend yeah no i'm not joking oh how far is a little look at that i don't know how fans oh man you go on earthquake mike uses chase points to go on the dog that would be awesome i gotta go visit earthquake magoon just immediately killed i think your weight would be too much to like you're far too tall for this right you'd have to punch your way out of the screen it's a good point what's it called how do you spell little usa i don't just put a k in there a little america c and k or just k c and k yes okay that's why it's like the russian yeah more like that i shouldn't like imply racism well it could be it could yeah i don't want to

the park is just an indictment of the united states this place is weird it's all little parody scenes of uh god you think this country's trying this it's like a whole park that's an editorial cartoon all the trash cans are labeled trash can trash can yeah everything is labeled senate the senate the clowns in congress or is it from the other is it like abortion clinic it's oh god every corner it's an indictment of liberal america oh maybe yeah that's interesting you were thinking it's a period oh no yeah i was like you know it's uh but yeah indictment of liberal america would also be great that's another little theme that's a little theme park you could do well that's maybe what heritage usa almost turned into which we will come around to in a little bit oh my god where there's so much

to talk about we haven't even gotten so much to talk you i'm assuming you have the full ownership history i do oh that's right it starts getting fun so i'll here i'll start blasting through some other stuff uh okay so So they opened this park. It immediately does not do as well as they think it's going to do. In the documentary, they talk to Al Cap's son, who says, the day it opened, I called my brother and I said, this is a mistake. There's no easy way to get here. It's not on the interstate.

It's got to compete with Silver Dollar. They opened it before I was ready. This thing's headed for a fall. All of those things were right. All of it was correct went for a while though but it did yeah as if we've covered years we've covered things on the show that were open for eight months yeah this thing made it a long time yeah it's still high enough in the 80s where you had a nice time there and it was i i remember the dancing i remember like vaguely like character people, but I don't know what they were. Sure, sure, sure. But like they were, it was just people with like augmented features.

You know what I mean? Like heavily augmented. I don't remember that. I don't remember that. But I remember like the wigs. Okay. You know, and like the big bright blue jeans and like the checkered, the gingham. Oh, yeah.

You know? Okay, okay. Like that. Would they talk to you or put on shows? I remember there were like dancing shows and stuff, and they would come out and do the whole theme park performance thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Abner!

You know, whatever it was. I'm filling it in, but I just remember like the noise sensation. The most playing out. You better get in! You know, like that kind of stuff. Stop hand-pegging me! We should just write the stage show. Just for fun, yeah. We can do it in 15

minutes. Is the CW one just called Abner? No, it's called Dog Patch. It's called Dog Patch. The Patch. The Patch is good, too. Yeah. So, it's doing poorly. from the beginning as soon as it opens barely surviving for 35 years is awesome like that's torture that's yeah i know it should have been put out of its misery i want to meet the one employee who was there from the beginning

and made it all the way through we find that in theme parks all the time people make entire runs and yeah like i remember the head of disney disneyland marketing started as a churro salesman in 1971 well that was one of those situations he was the head of marketing for disney very nice guy you could really go he went all the way up man do you okay really quick did you because you worked for do you work for disney marketing as did we both for a little while that's it's all other thing don't have time gotta get to kick a poo uh but did you ever did you ever go into imagineering and see some secret that is now a thing they have open i went to the imagineering

archives ah so that's in glendale and it's in like a very nondescript building that looks like a library like one story library yeah you could drive right up to it yeah but they had all the they had all the old stuff like it just in storage wow like the painting behind walt disney that they would have on the disneyland show geez and and how that when you when you turned a different light on it it would be the park at night and that was painted in like 54 which is like i don't know how they even did that and it was painted on wood art that could work as a night it would it would become the park at night yeah when you hit different light with it those old painters

were no joke because we've talked about those guys were serious the guys who did the backgrounds in the movies then just if you'd like i did the backgrounds in house in wonderland the movie then i did the ride i did the same thing 12 feet bigger than yeah i think when i when we walked away from disney like we had our problems, but, like, I had such an incredible respect for Disneyland and Disney World. It was... Sure. Like, just... I even get kind

of offended when people are like, oh, Disneyland. I would take my kid there. I want to take him. I'm like, it's an actual incredible experience. I mean... Sure, yes. Blood was shed for this park. Right? As good as it is yeah well look what can happen to a theme park look how it can decay in the nature this feels more like a mercenary venture this is a guy with a trout pond being like i want more what is it i don't know

little abner well but so i think what happened was the guy who opened it and this guy oj snow was smart he said we did okay this first summer. I think we should take the money we earned and put it back into the park. And then the other investors were like, no, give it to us, please. So they were depleting funds right away. One summer, that's all we were in for. Summer of 68. That's plenty.

People need theme parks. They probably did that summer. That was a bad year. That was a very bad summer. Well, speaking of bad stuff at the time, if we weren't depressing enough as it is uh they brought in a guy to be the president of dogpatch to take it into its second year they who did they bring in but former arkansas governor orville faubus he's less fun than jubilation t corn pone because he's the governor who refused to comply with Brown versus Board of Education and stopped nine African-American students from entering Little Rock High School.

They were called the Little Rock Nine. He is the governor who said, send the guards, make sure they don't get into the high school. And they had to be ushered in. So this is 1969. Probably the summer after, right? I don't know. I remember when this event happened. But in 69.

No, 69 when he was made president. He's made president of Dogpatch. So this is very fresh. Yeah, really recent. In people's minds. Yes. Like I would say if it was. There's the Norman Rockwell painting.

I mean, like this is, it's reached the heartland. Yeah. Story. And they're like, this guy. Yes. Yeah, yeah. He's untainted. And people got a good enough feeling about Orville Faubus.

Like, if there was a park called Funtime Good World USA, we'd meet your president, Stephen Miller. Yeah, like, that's so... What's that guy Stephen Miller doing? You know what he should do? He should be in charge of Tomorrowland. That'd be fun. He's the new mayor of Main Street. Mayor of Main Street. In four years. I don't think that's that impossible no well spicers on goddamn yeah

was on it before he became secretary of energy right oh my god so it's like okay let's just pick them whatever you want man kelly ann see kelly ann was like a character she was like an snl person she's not a real person who's contributing to the rise of fascism. She'll be the one that's mayor of Main Street. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Actually, yeah. She seems harmless enough. She's like, I'm just about having fun now.

I'm excited to join the Disney family. I'm having a great time. It's going to be nice. The cookie smell. My goodness. Stop asking. Everything's fine on Main Street. You didn't see that explosion.

God. The horses are doing great. That's how they've always walked. Horses walk limp. Horses cry all the time. So but this guy only was the president for he left within the year to unsuccessfully run for governor again, which he did. Well, he was given a platform by dog patch yeah to be fair he was like this is my moment yeah yeah yeah you gotta seize it let's become governor again like i could be a real politician again he tried two more times to become governor

and failed both times the last time he was defeated but in 1986 by one bill clinton so he dovetails right so i mean and then i don't want to assume anything but like clinton must have just had that nailed if that's the guy he was running against well i think it was like a you know like 69 to 30 right so it's just like with that but i mean like you could have put up i don't want to give arkansas too much credit but you could have put up anybody at that you could have put up abner you could have put up like he's not could have put up little Abner. He's not only like a political loser, but also infamous as far as American politicians go. A villain. All you have to do is say Little Rock Nine.

He's a little bit charismatic, this guy. I wonder if people came up to him at Dogpatch and were like, Little Rock Nine. Little Rock Nine, I remember. Yeah, they would have disliked him by then. Just throwing the Kickapoo juice on him. Hey, fuck you. Is that piss?. Just throwing the Kickapoo juice on him. Hey, fuck you. Is that piss? No, it's Kickapoo joint juice.

This guy threw piss on me. It's worse. That's our juice. I wish it had been piss. I wish it had been piss. I dreamed of piss. Kickapoo juice. You'd wish it had been piss.

This doesn't burn through your clothes like Kickapoo joint juice does. It's pure alcohol yeah it evaporates in the air i don't end up with holes you can't look directly at it why is the bottle shaking i didn't say by the way the kick a boo joy juice is only available in singapore malaysia brunei cambodia and bangladesh wait today what yes'm sorry, and you can buy it at specialty stores, like fun little soda shops. Oh, so it's still bottled and made? Can you get it at Rocket Fizz? I thought about getting it at Rocket Fizz, but

there's too much to talk about. I thought about doing a Kickapoo Georgia. They still make it. Okay, so there's one product that's still out there. Yeah, yeah, Kickapoo still. I don't know that it was ever super affiliated with the park. I've seen this can before. Really? You've run into Kickapoo Georgia? Yeah't know that it was ever super affiliated with the park. Yeah, I've seen this can before. Really? You've run into Kickapoo Jar Juice? Yeah, at least on the racks at the old soda shops.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, here it is. It is at Rocket Fizz. Did you check? Yeah, we could get it down the street. Yeah, I thought about doing it on the way, but... Kickapoo Jar Juice. There's so much coming.

You just stay tuned, everybody, because holy shit. I'm going to keep trying to pick up the pace here. But it's the most popular in Bangladesh. Interesting. It's like the Faygo of Bangladesh for ICP fans. I'm going to try it. So things are going badly. Orville left.

The energy crisis begins. Oh, that's right. And so people are struggling to have the gas to make it to uh all the way off the interstate you gotta go off the freeway to highway 11 oh wow geez uh is that what is highway 11 i think that's what it is could be yeah that sounds right um so and then al cap dies they stop making the comic strips so the property is no longer relevant the rural purge happens we don't care about paco junction 1980, the worst heat wave in Arkansas history. So many events are putting nails in this coffin.

How do we turn it around? Let's get Uncle Jesse from the Dukes of Hazzard. That's right. I read about this. That they got Uncle Jesse. That's his plan. Even in the Wikipedia article, they're like, popular country artists. I'm like, really?

Really? Maybe. Did he sing the song i mean that's like gotta be like no that's no that's waylon jennings that's okay that's like legit oh yeah outlaw country uh i mean that's what was going on around that time though but it's like so like really the dukes of hazard guy yeah yeah when there's this whole other wave happening and we're doing this like there's still willie nelson prime yeah yeah sure there's like a much cooler way to do country now and i see i see okay uh so the culture is not lining

up with this place branson's taking off uh it's so many reasons people are leaving and they in 1991 they don't want to keep paying the cap estate and the place closes permanently in 1993 uh then what because it's still there goes fallow for like just just untouched yeah that must be the end of interesting funny weird horrible things right you survived podcast the ride wait a minute hang on uh so uh i'm not really sure what happens until 2002 i'm not really i'm not quite clear on who owns it. But pre-internet though, so it's great, right? So it can just sit there and no one knows what it is.

Yeah. So no one's going, hey, whatever happened to Dogpatch? Unless they're on like a Usenet group. Yeah. So it's like this is... Alt.land.dogpatch.edu. Yeah, like people aren't, there's no one talking about this anymore. It just went away

yeah yeah probably that yeah and now you've got your facebook group no one remembers that falbus was once president of it like yeah no it's just it's just gone long and i remember the entrance it's literally recessed from the road so it's just the sign in that like insane leafy green canopy off a random highway so like no one gives a shit and so when maybe with this if they took the sign down ever then there's no way to know what the hell and i think they're they did i don't think they did or maybe the one to the road they did but the like the big entrance sign was still there maybe that always like they but so no one which is creepy do you remember taking it seems like at one point you had to park above the park and take a funicular

down to it whoa i don't remember that i came across it like angels or diagonal trains yeah the diagonal train that's incredible no i don't remember that wild um well and yet the internet a lot of hot landscape like that's what i what I remember. It was like... I believe that. Like, hot lake. I like the details. Hot dirt paths. The shops, like, artisan crafts. Hot cabins. Honey, fudge.

Like, how quickly did the fudge just dissolve in your hand? I remember the food. Like, the food and the shows. I don't know why that... And the paddle boats. You think the food was good? I mean, your trout was probably excellent. I think it was just, like, trashy, like, kiddie food. Yeah, sure. You know what I mean? Like, the fudge. But food was was the food good i mean what your trout was probably excellent i think it was just like trashy like pretty food yeah you know what i mean like

the six-year-old this sounds great yeah i mean like i was like probably from the age of trying to remember my parent my grandparents moved down there but it's probably from like the age of three to six so i went there enough it's a lot so a lot of your that's a lot of times in a church yeah but it's also in that like last stage of of infantile amnesia so like i just like it's just weird vast pockets are gone yeah yeah yeah but not dog well like like dog patch itself i guess vast pockets are it's all slowly dissolving uh so in 2002 the owners are fed up we got to get rid of this place they tried to sell the land on eBay for a flat million dollars. 2002 eBay.

Early eBay. Yeah. That's incredible. That's audacious. That's audacious is having a trout farm and being like, I'm going to turn this into an empire. This will be a theme park way off the highway. So, a million dollars on eBay. Not a single bidder.

That's where we're at. But maybe the platform wasn't adopted people weren't adopting like yeah how would you know to yes search theme park highest price do you think it'd be snatched up like within 24 hours today on ebay well it depends what's around that what's around crazy stuff has gone off ebay right yeah for sure but like is the land around there maybe valuable do we know what's is anything sprung up around dog patch i don't think so because they've had so much trouble selling this place yeah that's true so if they like still today so yeah i don't think any like it's not like a target is near it now let me just look there's a lot of new money and dark money out there i'm

gonna look up i'm just gonna look up bland on ebay we got a target oh yeah can you buy just property highest price land now any any part of los angeles for a million dollars goes in three seconds okay so i'm just getting here it's funny that mike has not gotten into land speculation yet you have to be but there's something really interesting about land speculation so you know obviously like i get into like doomsday spirals as we all do oh yeah i'm looking into buying land this was also like you know we start putting money away for my kids college and then there's just five to nine loans and i'm like is this like the best use and it's very constricted uh-huh um i was like what if i just bought a piece of land for my kids and that'll appreciate this land may be very crucial but they will they will you will get

screwed on on land all the time by like you go say you want to buy like 100 acres you have to go out there and survey it because there may be no access to the land it might be a hundred acres just like in the middle of yeah like the woods and if you don't have right-of-way pash it's already guaranteed through other people's land you cannot put any road to it right oh you have to ask permission to drive across the road yeah or you can get a hundred acres but it's it's it's in like a line like it's literally like in a line it's like 100 acres 600 000 you know like right in the middle of upstate new york and it's like in a line which is super weird the longest driveway because of like hundreds of years of land deals it's like this this family had this and this company had this and then well right in

the middle there there's like a hundred acres in a straight line i was looking at like plots i was looking at i was like would it be cheaper to build a house in los angeles i was like what's this mad i can't imagine either but i was looking like i'm like i wonder how much they're selling plots of land so i'm looking through like silver lake and there's plots but then there'd be like a plot that's just in the middle of a bunch of houses and i'm like i bet you can't build a house on that land i'm sure the permits are insane yeah there was a story a few years ago in l.a someone moved a house which used to be very common back in the day they picked up a house over more towards like hollywood west hollywood and moved it to los feliz and you just put it on a truck.

You just put the house on a flatbed truck and drive it at three in the morning, four in the morning when there's no cars on the road. And then you just put it down. Sounds easy enough. That like for now in 2019, that's like an oddly enough, like,

what do they do with like the foundation or something? Like, how do you get it up? I think you get it off the foundation. You lay a new one. Yeah. You lay with a new one you it's an easy thing like we'll get it yeah there's a ton of land on ebay really oh 500 results for arkansas all right specifically you're gonna get it you're gonna get dog patch dog patch might be on there maybe yeah what if it just went up like an hour ago zillow listing the twist ending we bought dog patch during the dog we've had it this entire time building okay a building lot in arkansas cherokee village

open to trade it says but it's listed at eighteen thousand nine hundred ninety nine dollars uh but they will accept the best offer uh can we use a coin from the world of zolom from the alita battle angel is that a good trade uh i will make that request i will something we won in a game let's see what the cheapest arkansas land we could buy i was like what yeah it's a movie we can just bid on 0.163 acres in arkansas and the bid is at a dollar 30 right now 0.163 acres in Arkansas, and the bid is at $1.30 right now. 0.163 acres. Yeah.

So that's probably, I'm trying to think of how many square feet. I don't know, yeah. Wow, secluded 0.23 acre lot. Just do the math. It's five times bigger than any home any of us will own. Mm-hmm. 0.15 acres in Little Rock is $37 up to right now. There's, wow. Golf course lot for sale in Fairfield Bay up to $200.

Wow. Why are we bothering with a podcast when the real money is in Arkansas land speculation? Arkansas real estate. This is how an episode of Justify starts and then Ray Lynn has to avenge us. 7,100 square feet. Wow.

That's a very, very, very, very, very large house. That's a ton, yeah. Yeah, really. And that's a very big house. That's probably like an eight bedroom home. Should I buy it for $13? You're gonna buy... I think you should not during the episode you're gonna need to read some land access you gotta have road access feels like a scheme pappy yokum uh we'd get into that layabout these la these la idiots they're off they're doing podcasts

all the time they won't even read the fine print they'll just buy the land yeah they won't give it to you um With a catch. You dig like an inch in and it's nothing but snakes. Pure limestone. You fly down to see it, you're immediately arrested because they think podcast is a type of bond. Unbuildable. Unbuildable land. $37. I don't know.

You guys are going to be really embarrassed when I'm a land baron in arkansas i'm just saying don't do it while we're recording there might be one thing you need to read i just bought three three three lots do a quantity yeah it's somehow a sinkhole but also combustible like it's all that also explodes full of dangerous gas But why go to all that trouble when there's a much easier way to get a bunch of land in Arkansas? And I think we all know upon this story. So I think you did too, Chris. So in 2005, 17-year-old Pruitt Nance was driving an ATV through the former Dogpatch property. Nance said he had permission from the owners to tour the property.

So he's driving his ATV around, and then he collides neck first with a length of tight wire strung between two trees, and he is nearly decapitated. How the hell? And he lived. He lived. He lived. How the hell do you live through near decapitation?

It's wild. That was the thing that I was like, i was scrolling like he's a lot is he alive like but then it was like medical damages and i was like that sounds like he's alive i know like they just put ronda rousey almost lost her finger shooting foxes 9-1-1 and like it was like severed so the idea that like your head is half and like that's what i'm like how do, how do we even put it off from that? How much, how much neck can you lose? That's my question. It's like,

cause it's going through, like, is it stopping at the, at the spine? Yeah, right. Probably right. I guess so.

Or is windpipe, did the windpipe block it? Or did it like bounce him back a little bit? I feel like you can't call it near decapitation if it stops at the windpipe. Yeah. That's the legal definition of decapitation. Sorry,

quit, not to derail this quick question what is going on on the set of fox's 911 that their stunt casting choice almost gets her fingers sliced off the biggest guest star coup is almost she caught her hand in like a door of a boat do you know that's how neil armstrong a finger? He caught his pinky ring in the tailgate of a truck as he was jumping out the back and it ripped it off. Oh, my. Was that moon landing or post?

I think post. Yes, definitely post. And Jimmy Fallon caught his ring finger on the corner of his counter and almost lost his finger. He almost ripped the finger off completely. And then almost the same thing happened like a month later. But anyway, he's fine and his rule as Tonight Show host is like a month later but anyway he's fine and his rule is tonight's show host is everything's fine everything's fine everything's normal folks

we're all having a regular one so so everybody be careful with your fingers and your necks this man lived anyway so nance so nance old nance i don't know how it played out, and I don't think I want to see any pictures or know further information. But here's what we do know. I would look it up. This case, I strung the wire up. I want to see. I saw comments essentially saying like, oh, this place can pretend that's not what they were trying to do. But like, I'm from Arkansas.

I know if you don't want people messing with your property, you put up a bunch of wires. Right. So I think they were trying to do but like i'm from arkansas i know if you don't want people messing with your property you put up a bunch of wires right so i think they were intended to try to yeah i was also thinking that near decapitation could have been language in the lawsuit yeah yeah like he was nearly decapitated right which means like probably he could have been decapitated it probably had a severing of an artery or something bad it could have like broken through the front of it it hit him he's bleeding real bad like an examiner being like if he had been traveling five more miles an hour right right yeah his head would have been a medical legal classification like a lot of indiana jones mine car kind of stuff like if he hadn't ducked right then right it was nearly he could right he could sue the temple indiana jones versus the temple of doom it's just legal proceedings

temple henry jones jr v v temple pan all the way up to the arkansas supreme court uh he is awarded 650 000 and damages uh and because the owners can't pay this in full instead they give him the land they just give him the deed, right? He gets the deed. You almost get decapitated on Dogpatch and then now you own Dogpatch. It's that easy, folks. So that's what you do. Go try to set up a decapitation scheme. Then you don't have to pay for it.

Try to wire yourself, but don't get your prints on it. You don't have to pay the $37. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, please, save the $37. Just go to court. Just go to the Arkansasansas supreme court that's what i'll do instead i'm doing the supreme court rig up yeah wire a length of wire like and it's a level from the game hitman it's a mission in hitman where you have to rig up give me his name again

what's the kid's name the kid's name is pruitt nance that is a p-r-u-e-t-t they were supposed to get hundreds of thousands of dollars that was just never paid to them instead they just so he owns the land now no not anymore not anymore for a while and i missed the last one i find no there's no information i could find about what happened when the 17 year old owned the land did it turn into it was it a blank check-esque romp i don't know was it as fun as bart owning the factory on the simpsons so he was 17 in what year that was 2005 2005 yeah yeah there's a picture of him he's fine he just has like a wicked kind of cool scar and he's actually like a handsome looking kid look at it hey he just has like kind of a cool it Oh. And he's actually like a handsome looking kid. Really? Hey, yeah. He just has like

kind of a cool, it almost looks like a tattoo. But it did hit the neck. Definitely hit the neck. Yeah, he's got like a kind of badass scar. It's kind of cool. You're right.

Yeah, it almost looks like a birthmark. And he's wearing sunglasses. Like he's like kind of a hip dude. I think he's on Twitter. Pruitt rules. Pruitt Nance,

the fancy prance. He's on Twitter, guys. What? Yeah, he's on Twitter. Where he describes himself as the fancy prance. At the fancy prance. Oh my God. All right, Twitter, guys. What? That's his name? Where he describes himself as the fancy prants. At the fancy prants. Oh, my God.

All right. Follow him up. Okay, here it is. Don't spend your life looking for a place called home. Make your skeleton the only structure you need. That's his bio. Bio. Oh, my God.

Pruitt Nance fucking rules. He only has 130 followers. Everybody follow Pruitt Nance. You will notice when everyone affiliated with a podcast and the creator of a television I'll follow him he's gonna hear this and be like please you guys were incredibly disrespectful of my injury no no I mean like I'm glad he's alive and he looks I mean from social media and the internet he looks very happy and like kind of a cool kid guy he has a cool hairstyle I like this I like this dude I'm a fan of Pruitt he's got like a jokey kind of twitter that

seems kind of fun yeah i know i like his hand nothing offensive so far hell yeah well i hope he had some fun yeah 215 17 be grateful it's a tweet he had hey he's putting nice things out into the world on twitter yeah he's not getting into the poisonous atmosphere. He's on Instagram as well. I know another company who's trying to put some nice things into the world. I don't know which one. Heritage USA? The first thing that came up when I searched him was car LLC v. Prance. The lawsuit. Oh, right.

Okay, I see. Okay. Okay, so then we end up with the caves are owned by somebody named Steve Rush. He tries to sell just the caves on eBay and fails. So, multiple eBay sales. Caves are cool, though, I will say. I just went to a cave last week. Can you find a cave?

I went to Interspace Cavern in Austin or in Georgetown, and it was awesome. Whoa. Yeah, I bet. We went deep down in there, and then they turned the lights off. They're like, and now we're going to turn the lights off, and you was awesome. Whoa. Yeah, I bet. We went deep down in there and then they turned the lights off and they're like, and now we're going to turn the lights off and you can't. And then the tour guide, for some reason, even though we had kids in the tour said, do you know those boys that were trapped in that cave for so long? This is what they saw for 16 days. And I was like, okay, thank you for telling my six-year-old son that Oh my god

He's just here to see the stalagmites and the stalactites But thanks Good to know They saw this pure darkness for 16 days Oh my god That's so cool How about we go get lunch at Panera now There's a gift store on the way out

Any caves for sale? No, there's like a man cave you can out and he gave us all the license plates uh no there's like a man cave you can buy oh i'm on board for that man cave for sale it's one man cave you can buy like they call it mobile office tiny home sheet like man cave or she shed oh the she shed yeah yeah i've never worn she shed uh it looks like the thing that the She Shed. Yeah. Have you heard of She Shed? Well, it's in a commercial. Yeah. I learned that from a commercial. I've never worn. This is She Shed. It looks like the thing that the last season of Better Call Saul, they have the guys building the meth lab.

Oh, yeah. That little indoor hang zone. Yeah. Yeah. Uh-huh. But no, like, fun theme park caves. Yeah. I could see having a little fun at that place.

Yeah. Maybe not months and months no uh okay so uh got to sell on ebay uh then in in 2014 the park was sold again uh this time to a guy named bud pelzor who invented the buddy bowl a spill proof dog bowl um and there are videos on youtube where he teaches you how to make make ice cream treats out of his dog dishes wait what like like he mixes up like ice cream floats in in the dog dish because it doesn't spill it should yeah he should just does he have a whole line of spill-proof bowls or is it only it's only the dog stuff yeah how the hell is that possible he's got the technology think big like the trout guy yeah yeah yeah spread it out this is other lines yeah spillable this is why shark tank would not invest because um it's a very niche market so he's like if you

don't have a dog buy this bowl and you can make ice cream in it. Your own dog. I'm buying one. This is a product for everyone, not just dog owners. You can be a single, childless, petless person and still enjoy the buddy bowl. Dual income, no kids. Unspillable dog bowl. Ice cream. Sounds like a good date night. It's going to brighten up your, yeah, your honey. Can you still buy a bowl? Let's share an ice cream sundae break a good date night it's gonna brighten up your yeah your honey can

you still share an ice cream sundae from your wife the dog bowl and then being like and being like no but this is for ice cream it's for us don't get upset no yeah no this is for us no it's not it's not it's not let dog bowl for your birthday it's hard difficult to navigate so it's a really thoughtful gift um you're gonna love it should i describe your name on it would that make you like it more you use it once and then it goes in the the top shelf of the cabinet and is thrown away when you die yeah next to the like the the extra nutribullet oh yeah the second the wedding one that you got from the yeah i told you to take that back it's still in the box you can get land on ebay put a neutral bullet on it there's a a dog on the front of the bowl who's like

like showcasing the logo with his paw here that's pretty good check it out look dogs can't point yeah that's not correct okay so now to get to this. I'll try to keep this quick because we've been going for a while. But now let me ask a bigger question. Who was the most problematic person never to run Dog Pets USA? Was it the racist governor? Was it the man who eats dessert out of dog bowls? Was it the multiple people who tried

and failed to sell it on ebay was it the nearly decapitated 17 year old it was not right it wasn't he probably should have had he should just he should have kept it yeah i know i think it'd be a cooler place although i'm i get selling it yeah yeah what am i gonna do with this 1700 yeah i was nearly decapitated where people keep me cash people keep breaking in and stealing like little like shards of glass from it yeah exactly that's right spray painted probably with horrible things and just like thanks so much yeah yeah yeah he doesn't that's a real dickheaded thing to do actually to think about it where it's like we almost killed this kid and we're gonna give him that we're gonna offload this awful albatross of a stagnant property terrible land in the ozarks now you can have that place where you almost died forever thanks you guys should get you should actually get him you guys should

get him on the podcast yeah i'm sure maybe he would do it. Charlie, it's yours. This whole is yours, Charlie. I feel like we really called him out. We love you and we're glad you're alive. I know. Thank you. Yeah, he's awesome. Clearly, yeah.

But here, yeah, do you want 20 rusted out sheds? No, I'm sure he was like, give me the cash. So after all that, the answer to who was the worst owner is none of the above because really well technically the land was leased by an entity called heritage usa uh heritage usa makes us owe john binkowski the owner of hard rock park many many rounds of apology uh heritage usa so in 2017 they leased the land and they take it over now if that land if that name sounds familiar to you heritage usa if you if you know weird theme park bullshit, you might be thinking, wait a minute. You mean Jim Baker's weird religious theme park that was open in the 80s where he did live like TV and broadcast from?

No, no, no. Different company. Unrelated. Seemingly just took the name without permission. Just like wanted to make that association uh and why don't i let a video describe what uh heritage usa is all about wait do i have the right one here we go uh let's let heritage usa explain itself heritage usa is a dynamic family entertainment multimedia resorts and property development

company whose focus is on celebrating america our mission is truth the truth of american exceptionalism and the truth that has enabled us to face our challenges and rise above adversity this is over some of the worst graphics you've ever seen one of the worst graphics you've ever seen, one of the worst fonts you've ever seen, then just random footage of jets. It has nothing to do with what they've done. And also, I think the guy's voice sounds pitch shifted even lower. It's like if you took Sam Elliott and cranked it down.

Put $500,000 in a duffel bag. Leave it in the vestibule of the chase bag. Your daughter is fine. Your daughter is fine. Your daughter is fine. You'll see her soon. She's the most shit of the best. She's an American. No cops.

She's an American. She's resilient. She's exceptional. The way to ingratiate yourself to a community and this beloved land that people are fond of is to sound as much like a kidnapper as possible. And now we've learned that this entity that this entity that's taking over old dog patch is about American exceptionalism. There's a bio that goes on and on and on.

They, uh, uh, so concerned about the desecration of American historical sites and the rise of anti-American sentiment within America's entertainment culture. That's where all the Hollywood guys in in this room a team of hundreds of writers directors producers musicians animators imagineers they just took the another term do that yeah that's known that's yeah they uncapitalized it that doesn't make it not a copyright and business professionals with over 40 years experience altogether 40 years hundreds of people have 40 years you totaled up hundreds of people, it'd be like 2,000 years. Unless none of them

have that much experience. They'll have six months experience. Over 40 years too. We started in 1979. 40 years is not that long ago. 100 acres and a line, baby. The last Gen Xers. Still religious.

The only religious Gen Xers. We came. The only religious Gen Xers. We came together to establish Heritage USA to celebrate American exceptionalism. They say hundreds, but I think that it is all just one man. And this man is named David Hare. Uh-oh. David, where do I begin with David Hare? So David Hare seemed to have another company before this. His previous company was called the Las Vegas Broadcasting Company.

They have a website that does not work. And their last post on their Facebook is from over a year ago. And it's apologizing for their Roku channel not working. He moved his operations from Las Vegas Broadcasting Company to Heritage USA. And after, so I found that video that I just showed you, the mission statement of Heritage USA. And there was a lot on this YouTube channel. It was a pretty robust Heritage USA YouTube channel.

And I didn't know what to click on, where to begin. Why don't I just dive right into the middle of the story with a video called Do It Talk 3 Moving Forward Period the Challenge. do it talk three moving forward period the challenge um now one thing to note is there is no do it talk one or two we jump straight to three those have been removed for terms of service violations very possibly yes um so i just want you guys to meet david hair the way that i met david hair and i think do it talk three gives you the best view of like this of this man and what I just want you guys to meet David Hare the way that I met David Hare. And I think Do It Talk 3 gives you the best view of this man and what he's about and his level of organization. I should note that this guy, he makes a lot of videos.

And there's a lot of differences between the videos. They're all very lengthy. No one is joining him. He's just talking at a microphone for a very long time. Sometimes, uh, he's in front of a painting of WC fields. Sometimes he's in a digital green screen environment with just like fireworks going off in the background.

Um, but always the commonality, always a diet Coke in front of them. Um, but here now to talk about moving forward, do a talk three, Do It Talk 3, David Hare. Well, this is Do It Talk number three.

And this is the fourth time that we've done Do It Talk number three. We've had some technical difficulties. So rather than keep contending with that, we decided to go one camera for this talk because it's a rather important one. You could cut this. Cut it.

I have a letter here from our attorney. Take a look. Not the attorney that you originally met, but a law firm that represents the corporation that I would love to read to you, and I could probably basically

wrap this up if I could kind of use this letter i can't and i've been told not to so i won't but i am going to read you one half sentence from it what what's the half sentence is it like i don't it's nothing it's nothing interesting uh uh what i elsewhere okay so that video and he says at the beginning i I want to be brief. I want to get right to it. But then he talks for 16 more minutes and it has things in it like, is it doomsday? No. No, it's not. And anybody saying that on the Facebook, I resent that.

It is not. Every video. And then that one's a short one. He has hour long videos of him just going on and on. Pinning down like, what is, what is he what is What is he doing? What is the company? What is he? What's his like belief System? Scatter shot insane

Okay I think this is a guy who has He's been trying to be like a media Professional since the 80s I found a Like in various ways he's been like a host of things On the Heritage USA on the YouTube Channel for this theme park that's coming out In 2020 supposedly there's

A footage of him performing in A musical that he seems to have written called Christmas is here oh my god 1990 I don't have a clip Of that it's like if Alex Jones had a theme Park and was a little it's very Alex Jonesy and that he seems to be like switching Careers right he is a guy who just Rambles on and out can just unprompted at a theme park and was in a musical. It's very Alex Jones-y in that he seems to be like switching careers.

He is a guy who just rambles on and on, can just unprompted, and who's getting into fights with nobody in these videos. I found a pilot that he made in 1989. There's someone that I will not mention that this really reminds me of that you also know. I'm sorry to do that on the podcast, but it's somebody we

filmed some of their content for them. Oh, oh, oh, oh, yes. I also put my fist we filmed some of their content for them oh oh oh i also put put my fist through the wall of their stage something that made you so mad that one day we walked i walked into work and there was a flat oh no i put a c-stand through yes there was a c-stand sized hole c-stand through the through the stage oh you mean like a you're saying a sort of scammy guy who just tricks company after company. He doesn't have a good sketchy meter. Self-inflated.

I know. I see what you were talking about. He kind of reminds me of Alki David. Oh, the billionaire. There's this weird guy we ran into who owns the Hologram Theater on Hollywood Boulevard. And he's been sued and lost a sexual harassment lawsuit like a year ago. Or no, this year very recently and makes some of the scariest instagram stories you've ever seen that's all where he just like calls his wife a bitch and like it's like jeez one of the grimmest things

you've ever yeah but yeah weird where you look into it and when you look into somebody's history and like huh i wonder if this person has owned 12 weird companies over the years not a good sign uh uh so yeah okay and then he made a pilot for a show in the dallas fort worth area i don't know if growing up you caught the seemingly single episode of family jubilee nope um no there was a special appearance from impressionist Fred Travolina. Oh, my gosh. They got Travolina? They got Travolina. We got Travolina. He probably did Reagan. Mr. Travolina.

Mr. Travolina. But Jason, as you were saying, he, since the 80s, has been peddling around a character named Hubble Hair. Hubble Hair is in the logo of Heritage USA. And this footage from a long time ago of like a guy of a Hubble hair suit. And you can only assume he's the one in the Hubble. So he's been carting. He also seems to have come from Orange County. So this guy has just been doing weird media enterprise after weird media enterprise trying to make his character thing. He seems to have a real Walt complex.

Like there's a video where he says because we're doing it like the original did it walter i'm gonna say four shots in walter i think orange county california has some of the weirdest darkest energy in the country i i i buy that yeah well being that we obviously we love anaheim and we're very excited for our show the anaheim hotel which is still to come as we put this episode out we're thrilled but there are also we're like it's like kkk stuff in anaheim yes i i that's what i was still yes we were texting about like alcohol in in disney and i i i didn't want to get into this because i was uh you know with my family about to go

to the beach but i sort of alluded to like the some of the residents of orange but orange county just seems like a powder keg to me because it's like a hotbed of uh classes like the highest of highs in terms of money and the lowest of lows and there was a huge white nationalist presence and then there is a massive entertainment complexes in the middle of it and it always just makes me very nervous sometimes not in the Disney bubble that's fine but like

I posted an Instagram one time of just saying how much I like Orange County and what I mean is like the resorty I like it I like the route that the Disneyland Resort I like Newport Beach like top shelf yeah route at the disneyland resort i like newport beach like top shelf yeah that's the side of things i just went and wandered around like a the hyatt regency in huntington beach and had a great time uh stuff like that so i just posted instagram like i love orange

camp man another great orange county weekend and a friend of mine texted me and said uh are you talking about the same county where my uh my family my children and i were recently hassled on the beach for being jewish like there is weird yeah yeah and i so i don't know i don't think we're casting aspersions on all of orange county but i know you said there is weird there are weird pockets weird pockets totally plenty of normal people plenty of weird pockets do you think this guy is is is like a huckster who's just kind of changed things over the years and now he's kind of, is he saying American exceptionalism because he knows that's kind of a thing right now? It's an angle and it's where like scrappy, shady media is. I can be a conservative media person and I'll probably be readily embraced.

I think so. Or is he like a hardcore Orange County like pub? I'm not sure. It doesn't seem to because there's nothing I will say there's nothing in any of this stuff alluding to to hate or anything. Well, it's just the like fighter jets and stuff. It's like it seems like that's appealing to a certain. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not extreme. And also what I think is that he's a guy who got pushed.

He didn't like fit into the entertainment industry like the mid the mainstream. Right. So he's blaming it on. Well, I guess they don't respect my values. And that's what happened. Because in this thing where he's supposed to be saying what we're doing, the video should be, I'm going to fix the merry-go-round next week. And instead, it's like, we're going to build a studio and we're going to start making animations. And he goes on and on and on, wearing blazers that go like up to half of his arm. It's the strangest style.

I feel crazy describing this. He describes how he's working on a show that's a little bit of an adult animated show, kind of like The Simpsons or American Dad, where we're going to talk about those people in Hollywood and remind them of the way they used to do it and remind them of how their point of view isn't everyone's point of view. And he proceeds to play... How they used to do it. See, that's what bothers me. That's leaning into like, that's like code for

when it was musicals with whites. You know, it's like... When all minorities were suppressed and made invisible as labor that was non-unionized, or we would destroy their lives. And it was a little easier to beat your wife. Right. Exactly. When Al Cap could show up on any set.

When things were like the way Al Cap ran them. Eddie Mannix would show up at your house and break your windows if you didn't get to set on time so then he shows a video and the video is called Hollowood and in the video he voices Carol Channing Carol Channing for some reason he's really going contemporary he's just really reaching for the edge

yeah yeah yeah and he even says kids google Carol Channing she's a you know her she's a she used to talk like this and does a terrible carol channing impression and she sings a song called you were wrong uh uh no counterpoint you were wrong and it is a song about how like hollywood people telling you your opinions you know it's this really like you got it wrong yeah yeah yeah don't tell me what to think again this i put i thought i was putting on a video about like and then the train track will cross

through the new meadow that when we're putting in nice new grass um isn't it funny that the criticism is always like the content is lascivious violent over sexualized disgusting amoral and then also preachy progressive opinionated holier than thou elitist too academic where it's like wait it's almost like what do you at what gives you describe what would you make yeah yeah well and what they often answer is like dean kane firefighter movies that's what which is that's fine they're fine i'll take it that is good yeah at least really the firefighter movie people put their money where their mouth but i also feel like 99 of stuff that hollywood generates is also dean cain firefighter movies yes it's higher quality people are more experienced but the dean cain ones are the ones that moralize for they like

take specific times tomorrow so it's like don't moralize. Get your politics out of my comics or my movies. Unless I agree with you. Don't moralize this stuff. And then it's also like, this is disgusting, prurient content. Trash. But then so much of that trash is like, well, you know the US Army paid for half that movie. She had to get those tanks and jets from somewhere. Yeah. I'm never sure what they're talking about especially

when it's like dancing with the star yeah get this vile like the navy the navy enlistment rates going up after uh top gun right same thing yeah oh yeah where it's like what are we supposed to stand for make me whatever you want to make me charles manson quote all right i'm gonna go It's a pretty Confused It's a narrow window Other quotes from this guy You know because I'm not sure It's widely understood

Within certain parts Of the entertainment industry That the American flag Is a good thing So we're gonna celebrate it We're gonna do it with fun Do it with fun he says Literally the movie

Skyscraper Ends with the American flag being furled and taking up most of the... Wait, Spider-Man 1. Spider-Man 1. He's on the Washington Monument in the new one.

He's talking about those Hollywood elites like Colin Kaepernick. I'm sick of Colin Kaepernick and his movies telling me where to put my flag kaepernick movie well he should be an action star yeah he's not gonna get drafted no i'm in a movie he'd probably be awesome sure yeah yeah i'll show up i'll show him and him and dave grohl we're with the riffraffs who we want to put they used to get see they have charisma even though they're not actors properly yeah sure yeah older now he

bangs on uh bad guys heads like it would be awesome like their drums got a lot of documentaries to appear in okay so he's saying that we don't respect the american flag we don't respect the american flag the educational system is being overrun with an anti-american agenda uh christian values are under attack all of this stuff and why So you're going to build a little place with a train? Why is all of this important? This is Decker. This is just Tim Heidecker's Decker. You got it.

It is so Decker-esque in that it's like really that he just rambles on and on and on. A lot of like heavy breathing. You know, look, if Dogpatch USA was up, if the name Heritage USA Ozarks Resort at Historic Dogpatch, if that's what the full title is going to be. If that was open and thriving today, I wouldn't be questioning anything. But it is not. And so here's what seems to have happened. So he plants on the land.

Allegedly. He plants on the land. He's making a lot of videos talking about all the cartoons that we're going to make. We're going to make a Hubble hair animated film. He's like angry at no one. Because animation takes a long time. Okay? So give it a minute.

We'll be done with the logo in three months. I love giving you a human target. That's always my favorite, Scott. You've seen that side. Let's put somebody squarely in Scott's crosshairs. It'll be good. Yeah, yeah it does does light me up uh uh okay i'm here i'll be careful though i i don't know it's like we all read the wikipedia i think when you're a public figure you open yourself when you're a high profile you have a youtube channel that's speaking has He has a YouTube channel. You are the Andy Cap of YouTube.

He's got a forum. He's Andy Cap or Al Cap. Using each other's forums. You are making hot fries on YouTube. No such thing as bad press. Alright, now here I'm just gonna, okay, so he's making a lot of videos. He's talking about how we're gonna make animated films. There's a lot of plans. What he doesn't seem to be doing is like fixing up the park.

I'm watching these videos i'm watching hour-long videos i'm i'm wanting to i'm wanting to turn them off like all right it's getting a little dull maybe any and then 38 minutes into a video he will say okay look somebody buried the pool at the hotel all right it is covered in sand and we've been meaning to get it fixed and it is on our list it is on our list. It is on our list. But in the meantime, we know the kids need somewhere to play. We have a moon bounce. We got Havalares moon bounce.

So if you're going to stay at the hotel, go to the moon bounce. The pool was buried in sand? What? I mean, I guess. How did that happen? Some people don't hurt themselves by falling into an empty pool, although that clearly they weren't looking out for people's safety. There's a lot of safety issues all around. hotel is open um this is important to note i read fleetingly like and i may have gotten this wrong but like that people were booking rooms and

they there wasn't a place to go that's that's absolutely fire festy and i will credit him and that he uh he wanted to not open the hotel until the rooms had all been remodeled. There's other financiers saying, we got to get this place open. So they do open the hotel, but it builds to a point, yes, where there is nowhere for them to go. The guests, right? Yeah, guests at the hotel. If you come, there's nowhere to go. Possibly because he's putting a lot of time

into making various videos. Let me play this quick one. Imagine in this video, for anybody who doesn't have eyes on it, there's sort of a sub-Sherry Lewis puppet who is driving a Mr. Toad-esque vehicle in a green screenscape. And there's a song called Down in Dogpatch.

Down in Dogpatch All the critters play Down in Dogpatch Folk would come from miles away Down in Dogpatch That gives you the idea. Can I have a little more? I want to see if there's like a chorus or something. Make that your ringtone, Scott.

We got a heck of a day. Can do. Closer to the mic. Yeah. Riding on that train. I'll be honest. I like it. It kind of makes me a little nostalgic.

I was thinking it might sort of recall like what maybe the little bit of the childhood magic. Yeah, like I got a little bit there. But then you watch another video where he shows you a taste of that. And then he says, here's the problem. The video is not done because we haven't done the color correction. And color correction takes a while. And you have to film it at different times of the day. And the sun moves.

So how many views does the video have on average? Like 500. Okay, but are there comments where people are like, this looks like shit. Is he yelling at anyone? I think there was a Facebook page facebook page i mean no one physically in the videos is yelling at but he seems to be responding to vague criticisms like bad sentiment in the facebook group like criticisms he says at one point uh let me find it uh look i'm not god i'm not a deity i don't know all things i appreciate the well wishes of most of you so he's clearly getting some negative criticism anytime he's ever said something like that one person said it yes like when we got one three-star review and it drove us crazy and i think it's still if we

really thought about it we got yeah look we're working on it we don't have mic stands yet yeah we're a new podcast we didn't know um the sand in the pool thing reminds me of a story and just like you guys get your first anonymous I'll keep everyone anonymous in the story but someone went into a meeting once with someone and the person

they were going to meet with was late and they came in they're like so sorry I got held up at the mechanic a rat crawled in my engine they're like all right yeah the engine of my car is a rat in there you gotta tell us yeah i will if listeners want to dm any of you to get the names yeah we can yeah yeah including if we believe in the name of who we're talking about it's a higher patreon tier maybe yeah yeah yeah the slander tier the slander tier gets you uh um so anyway uh yeah a lot of video yelling at no one i can't stop reading them we are renting atvs the answer to the question can we bring our own well no it's not a free-for-all you gotta ram from us

it makes okay given the history yeah yeah you're right but later in the same in the same stint uh look i'm not putting down canoes but you know we have to ask we have to get involved and ask questions. Don't you think? Well, I don't know if that's gone radio silence. If you're inviting that into your life. I don't know if. I think we already have.

I think, oh, yeah, I think we could be hearing about this in a negative way. He's like, well, I don't like your shows or your podcasts. These Hollywood. One star. Ponies are. Yeah, he's going to leave us a review. One star Amazon review. Well, if you know how to get to the podcast

the right guys, give us a three star review and we'll be infuriated forever. Catch fuck you. Catch fuck you. I like this song though. I like this song that this guy made with a puppet. I like the puppet song. The farts you lose.

The farts you lose. No one's going to see that. That farts you lose. These color corrections, but the farts you lose. I gotcha. No one's going to see that. That's what you're saying to yourself already. That's me. Yeah, I already said that earlier on the podcast. Way ahead of you, David. Your own negative commenter.

Okay, so he's making these dog patch videos, which, by the way, and you should watch the whole thing. It's a lot of fun. It's about, that guy's name is Foxworthyworthy and he watches a news report and he gets mad that uh hobble hair hubble hair is moving to his town and he's like i'm gonna get him so then he watches like a dossier from like sort of a you know what the charlie and charlie's angels type dog who gives him the mission here's how you gotta go stop and that video is called down in dog patch episode one part one again there are no further of these um and even within this thing my god puppet dog takes the time on out of nowhere he takes the time to say hey have you seen the fbi director's

new book it's a real work of fiction like mary poppins like he's criticizing comey within this so this sounds like he's like a personal thing like he's it'sy within this video about a fox so this sounds like a personal thing it's bleeding into his normal universal content well you know his endeavor to reach a mass audience but it's in there so he's gotta get it out through the puppet's mouth

yeah yeah yeah and fuck Comey by the way Charlie Horse on Lamb Chop started complaining about Dan Quayle. You know who's an idiot. Learn how to spell. Chris, this is

you've opened up Aaron Aaron is going to be calling you and go like why did you plant this seat? Oh God, I know. The apartment's covered

in red strings. Sorry man. He's going to come after Aaron on Twitter. Oh no. Me. Well, he won't find me. Everyone's in trouble.

We open a real can of worms. Go watch the movie and enjoy it. It was a quiet, beautiful thriller. Yes, yeah. I saw it early. Cut of it. It's wonderful. Is it playing Dogpatch?

Is the road show? Yes, we're going to do the Dogpatch. We're going to do it. You're using one of the rooms as the Dogpatch movie house. Put a big sheet up from the unopened hotel from the bedroom. Might be bit bugs in that sheet so there's definitely sand yeah there's some sand and we're gonna go swimming in the sandy the sandy holler pool yeah and enjoy a after party at the sand pool uh so all of this stuff is happening what

doesn't seem to be happening is the improvement of the land and the part in in okay so I'm gonna take you now this is all starting in 2017 in June years of this now we're in Trump's America in June happy he's found a voice in the White House I should also say that in some of these videos he's he's saying all of this stuff with it in front of a table. And the table has four identical bald eagles that are like on top of rocks with the American flag. So this is real for him, I think.

Yeah. There's a lot he's been stewing on and thinking about. He's angry about a lot of stuff. Yeah. He's got a place to chat. And he bought acres of land where he can preach his truth. Sure. Those four totems will summon the elder gods.

The ghost of Falbus has emerged from the sand pool. Earthquake McGillicuddy. Falbus' ghost is loose, okay? What do you want me to do about it? God. These Facebook commenters, you tell me how to get a governor's ghost out of the same pool. I'm not saying he was right to keep those

kids out. I'm just saying we don't know what was going on with him. And that takes a tremendous amount of sacrifice. He had responsibility to his voters. You try to carry the weight of knowing the one true name of God, okay? Sipping right over into craziness.

This guy. All right. It's June 2018. The videos are starting to trickle down. Less rants. In June, he posts a video that's all home

movies of himself scored to a song that he himself sings called Follow Your Heart. Do you have it? I don't have it. He's turned in. Follow your heart.

Everything's scored by songs that he himself is singing, including the Carol Channing song. There is a theory about alien civilizations where civilizations will become so advanced that that's why we don't hear from them because they will turn inward and become self-obsessed. So maybe David Hare has reached that point of his media journey where he's just,

he's not interested in anymore. In the puppets. Yeah, yeah. In the bullshit the bullshit he's surrounding he's like building a little universe of mirrors we don't get it so he's like this is for me he thought i have a content now people are gonna get it yeah but but two facebook commenters revolted i can't find solace anywhere another thing that starts happening around this time is that he stops paying rent on the property entirely. It's May 2018. He stops paying rent. He's specifically leasing the hotel from whoever was owning the hotel.

He turned it into a motorcycle-themed hotel called The Hub for a little while. And he stops paying rent. And this is also a problem because he's also living at the hotel. Oh, my God. He lives at the because he's also living at the hotel. Oh my god, he lives at the hotel. He's living at the hotel. And also he's also selling like come stay here. He's like booking

the rooms. I think it's great. It's working for me. I've been living here for several months. It's awesome. Would I live in it if it sucked? They stopped taking my room service plates away. It's like his equivalent of Belushi at the Chateau Marmont. Oh, God. The final years.

The documentary shows footage at the very end of motorcycle Mad Max looking people, and it doesn't explain why. Oh, and it's presented in a way of like, but things, maybe things could work out for Dogpatch after all. Cut to a bunch of scary people riding motorcycles around here. Fine for us. Down in Dogpatch. As long as we enforce the laws. We're going to sharpen our knives on leather.

Fire shots from yards away. I drink out Abner's skull. I drink my Kickner's skull. I drink my Kickapoo Joy Juice. I'll show you Kickapoo Juice. It was a Mountain Dew competitor, but I think it's better. Those motorcycle people just tore apart David Hare and ate him. That's what happened to him.

That's why we have an orange room. Well, maybe. Wait a minute, guys. Do you want to hear about Hubble Hare? Is that what happens happens he's quartered by motorcycles uh okay in august 2018 he gets an eviction notice he has 10 days to vacate the premises or to like start paying rent or something uh and he does the noble thing he leaves in the middle of the night he just bail bail bail all gone he. Bail. All gone. He just walks away. And he was not.

But then he. So they're like, oh, god damn it. And it's still owned by. He's just leasing. Everything's still owned by the dog bowl guy. Right. The dog bowl guy who was like, I believe in this maverick. He's going to turn it around.

He's going to make it Heritage USA. He says to the news who interviewed him about this, like he came in with a good business plan. He's like, I know good business plans, OK? Have you you seen my balls i'm the inventor of the buddy he showed me uh various puppets he had these puppets they were incredible he had a very dense mythology he said he was going to color correct the videos i trust it sounds like a complicated process i don't know about video he's working on it i mean look you've seen his videos he also by the way i tried talking to him he yelled at me i'm busy i'm doing the videos that's who he's yelling yes sir okay fuck your balls okay

you walk around here with your judging eyes walking he's walking around abandoned dog patch with one of the dog bowls eating ice cream out of it wonder how damn wonder how it's dripping into the hair. You done with the hair drawing yet? No! Nobody gets me! Get off my back! Three months, you'll see it! He also constantly concludes points with, and we're doing this as we speak. This is

happening as we speak. Also, I missed a quote where he said, about the hotel pricing, how they're pricing the rooms, even though they haven't been remodeled. Look, we aren't doing anything abnormal. There's no't doing anything abnormal there's no bait and switch there's no bait and switch which is a great thing to yell so someone convinces me there is if you're yelling did he ever like start talking to the puppet in the like the back of the room ever like did he start having a conversation with foxworthy what do i do fuck Foxworthy? You understand. Follow your heart.

Of course I will. You think we should leave? Right now? It's four in the morning. There's only one way out. Take me. If you say so, Foxworthy. We're a family.

I'm your son and you need to save me. He's got a pile of puppets in the passenger seat of the old Civic. Go! Take us to a place where we can all marry each other and be free so has this guy been heard from since or is he uh he came back the next day to try to get his car but it wasn't the car had been locked up and taken into the convention center of the hotel so and since then or no this is a different this is the hub convention center okay uh since then i'm not sure about lately but at least for a few months, he was not heard from.

Just disappeared, went off there and everybody just started suing him. And this leads to a point that I think is what you ran into where, okay, a mother and a daughter on a vacate. They're like, we're going to do a mother daughter trip. You know where I used to go is this place Dogpatch and I hear it's open again and the hotel's open and i booked the room and we're gonna go they even they took my money already so everything must be fine and it's and they get lost because as you said it's hard to find the area uh uh it's way off country roads like the old highway at this point i don't know but like i would imagine it's like it was like a two lane that's what i remember is little abner still on the sign? Do we know? They put up a

Heritage USA sign with Hubble hair. Hubble hair is on the sign now. But it says historic dog patch. I would go to historic dog patch if it was meticulously restored. Sure. Which hopefully they will do. I'm looking for this property

but it's been a rough road. I would go if there was a sandy pool. I don't care. I'd like to see a bunch of sand. That kind of sounds fun. Now we also have to now do the old Heritage USA, the Jim Baker Heritage USA. Oh, yeah. Featuring the water slide that Jerry Falwell in a full suit went down. Oh, my God.

Wow. Wait, really? Is that true? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. wow wait really is that true oh my god oh my god before a few years before Jerry Falwell

described Jim Baker as like the most vile man coming from Jerry Falwell I'll go down your slide but you're still a piece of shit

let's just roll this episode into the Jim Baker one yeah you want to start doing it no research I know

we are now I knew this was going to dance on Hard Rock Park when you stumble upon a world of multiple owners of scandals of lawsuits Start doing it. No research. I know. I knew this was going to dance on hard rock part. When you stumble upon a world of multiple owners, of scandals, of lawsuits, of American exceptionalism, of kickapoo joy juice. Oh my gosh. There is so much stuff.

If I could say a happy ending, the nice thing is that the dog bowl guy still owns it. And what happened to this mother and daughter is like, so they're calling. It's late. They get so lost. They don't arrive until 11 PM. They're trying to call the place. Like, how do we get there?

No one picks up. They arrive in the dark and then some, they flagged down a, they flagged down a passing vehicle. And the driver says, Oh, heritage USA. They were evicted earlier this week.

They weren't paying the water. There's no water. There's no electricity. This mother and daughter on a trip are no, are stranded. Essentially. This is very fire festival a trip are stranded, essentially. This is a very fire festival. But then, they somehow, like,

the dog bowl guy finds out about it and says, you know what? I will take you on a tour of the property, and I'll show you all those places you had these nice memories. And he canceled a vacation in order to take the time to show the mother. And how restored was the place at this point? Like, was he just like, oh, nothing. These are where squatters used to take a time to show the mother. How restored was the place at this point?

Was he just like, these are where squatters used to take a dump. You know? We had a man living here for several months. There was a colt. This was their base of operations for some time. He ate all the trout out of the pond. That was 97.

Just trout with their bare hands. They swallowed them without cooking them. You imagine coming out here and seeing people eat trout with their bare hands. They swallowed them without cooking them. You imagine coming out here seeing people eat trout with their bare hands? It happened last week. Just a reminder, folks. Most banks, credit card companies, PayPal, you could just reverse a charge in our modern world. You can just say, cancel that charge, please. Yeah, because it's kind of like our guy here, right?

They're like, well, sorry, here's the park. And this is the ice cream guy being like, I'm going to take you on a tour of this derelict property. Yeah. That is probably like a, although that is kind of sweet, though. Because you can't go on vacation. I'm trying to, yeah. Well, but there's nobody to give the money back. That makes him a very poignant kind of noble character in the story.

I like the dog bowl guy and I like the atv 17 year old um the other person i just like the you know give them their money bet like i think and there's facebook pages now are flooded now he's good now there's a mess now people are saying i so i just eat that money i guess so he's just out there we don't know where he is i don't know so i don't know how much of what we just said you heard due to editing but colorful tales were told i had no i i truly can't believe how much uh fell out of this pinata you guys it was smashed open i feel like i've received a gift um fantastic because i never knew as you said a bunch of this a nice like nice surprises of information. It was nice to teach you all of this. But to hear your nice memories and about your dual toys. Hey, look, what I'm trying to say is, Chris Campbell, you survived podcast.

Rudd, thank you so much for being here. Thank you for doing this. One of my favorite topics. Thank you, guys. Even if it's the topic that kills us. No, I think i put fear into your head you're fine really yes i think it's the producers that they talk about on how do this get made or like anything like anybody's shitting on anybody that's a lot of

we're just having fun i think these people are like this these are genuinely tragic figures that are very vivid very vivid the local news had some pretty harsh words. Like when I was looking it up, the local had some pretty harsh words. Heritage like failed. Yeah. Crooked. And he left town. Just hearing that laid out in a,

and hearing the guy say like, he didn't fix anything. It's worse than it was before. That's so sad. It's really crazy. He's out there right now. But he gave us these YouTube videos that are, and i really do recommend people just load watch all of the heritage usa i will yeah i'm gonna put that one

down in dog patch song on my iphone it's a full size of three minutes on i know i wanted to hear all of it uh i want i would like a foxworthy puppet yeah if i could get that we could maybe get let's reinvigorate this guy's career. Maybe we'll juice him up. I don't know. I enjoyed Christmas is Here, the musical from 1990. Really? Yes.

No, you said earlier there was no video of it. So I'm like, how did you? No, there's a video. Oh, there is a video of it? There's a video of Christmas is Here, the musical. Oh, no. Yeah. And I watched as much as he put up on his Vimeo of Country Jubilee.

Fun Time Jubilee? I don't remember. Fun Time Jubilee is the... Look, there's all of... Let me just slip this real quick in is that we did a Patreon episode about McGruff's music career. Yeah. But I found the guy who wrote all the songs.

And I'm still trying to get in touch with him. But I found his song about 9-11. Oh, my God. So, everybody has different types of stuff. I think I played it for Jason. So you're saying this to show that... I'm just saying everyone has a variety of things they do with their career.

And we're just criticizing. I think even he could agree that his theme park owning career was not the most successful. We are being so nice to him right now. Very nice. We are handling him with kid gloves, guys. Because I'm scared because I'm a good boy. This guy is a guy that's probably in a Motel 6 somewhere.

He's peeking out the blinds. He's waiting. He's waiting for the sirens. Looking for the next opportunity. Yeah, he's like, he's on the phone. He's got a Wi-Fi access at a coffee shop. And he's like, what can I do? Well, yeah, he's hiding in a safe house

in a plot reminiscent of your film coming out but he was shot and he's on an icy river dragged to safety by a deaf child but where is foxworthy yes he's with a deaf child somewhere it's like he's hiding in a family barn yes so if you want to know what happens what else would you like to alert people to you got a lot going on yeah uh boy i got a comic book coming out on september 4th called everything which is about a uh a very shady weird maybe evil department store in 1980 oh great um you are uh living the dream and writing Dr. Doom coming up Dr. Doom comes out on October 9th yes

I've gotten a lot of fans of Dr. Doom have opinions about would you like to record some hour long videos where you address all of these issues look I didn't create him okay to Dr. Do. Would you like to record some hour-long videos where you address all of these issues? Look.

You're working on it. I didn't create him, okay? There's a lot of mythology out there. I inherited some of the problems from the previous owners. Created in the 60s, for Christ's sake. I'm doing what I can. Every issue he's appeared in? I am working on it. This is being worked on as we speak. He's never

had the Infinity Gauntlet, okay? I know that. That comes out October 9th. I'm'm excited about that they're letting me get away with stuff so far uh the mask i'm bringing the mask back yeah very excited then wait and wait the title of it i i pledge allegiance to the mask oh my god so he's ready for president see the mask like there's a lot of clickbaity headlines about how it's political and it's more just like anarchical and nihilistic sure which is part me part kind of the character yeah uh so that comes out october 16th and uh geez that's it and the movie october 4th oh man so it'll be a good october yeah yeah this is a nice october well you have such a good comic con so much to announce yeah that was fun

and everything will be going on for at least a little while and hog catch fire where you watch hog catch fire now you can buy it you can buy it it's still netflix yeah you watch it for free on netflix oh it's not for free everyone thinks netflix is free i think so yeah just forget it's not on netflix right it's like well you pay 15 a month it's on netflix it's on amazon i think it's still on On Demand. I know it's on AMC Premiere, which is their streaming thing. Yeah, it's been in so many lists lately. People still talk about it, which is nice.

Yeah, it'll keep happening for sure. The fact that people are still talking about it is really nice because it was the dog patch USA of TV shows when it first premiered. No one knew about it. It was very difficult. You had to go off the interstate onto a two-lane highway and wait until you hit mile mark or whatever. It's not the... Turn on at 10 p.m.

Walking Dead is the Magic Kingdom and you're off the beaten path. But people... Yeah, exactly. Such fond memory. We were a thousand acres. Down it, halt and catch. Spy. Down it.

And if people went too far They ended up at Turn Washington Spies That's right Turn Washington Spies Yeah That would Joe McMillan If we had done a fifth season He should have invested in Dogpatch Because it would have been right as it closed

Right as it closed It would have been 95-96 I'm selling that to everybody else this is a steal possibilities beyond which if you start pitching the story of dog patch please at least give us some vanity titles

give us some associates but I think you gotta do like the weird Charlie Kaufman version where like Lil Abner shows up at abandoned dog patch and it's like really good yeah where like little admirers shows up at abandoned dog patch and it's like really yeah yeah yeah yeah he's hunting david hair david hair is being hunted by little admirer that's what he believes probably was going on in his head yes by the legacy and uh if i may jason sheridan could play

available jones hey hey yeah i just do the spin-off of that right away okay yeah you know Jason Sheridan could play Available Jones. Hey! Hey! Yeah! Available Jones. Why don't you just do the spin-off of that right away? Okay, yeah. People think this is an original project. It's actually a spin-off of Little Abner. A comic that ran for 40 years. Oh, good. As long as it's IP. Wonderful. Original IP? Great.

Yeah, 60 million. Yeah, Little Abner? Great. Here you go. Have fun. Today's Stubby K, Jason Scherz. I'll take it. He's a real Stubby K, that Jason. I'll take it. Okay, well, that was a lot of fun. Hey, we don't have to plug all this stuff.

You know what's up. I like that people might be listening to this and then showing up at our live show. We're like halfway through this. Oh, my gosh. I hadn't even thought about it. What a thing for people to... All right, if we see you at the live show in Anaheim... Tomorrow.

We're excited. Wait, you guys are doing a live show in Anaheim tomorrow? We're doing a live show in anaheim tomorrow we're excited live show in anaheim as we record yes yeah if you're listening to this on the day it comes out yeah yeah yeah down by the d23 expo uh where i tomorrow i was once sent uh by when we worked at disney together by stalwart panels very grounded company yes yes yeah yeah uh that's awesome uh yeah yeah yeah we're so excited we're gonna have a lot of fun and uh yeah yeah we'll uh we'll see you but more ask us any dog patch questions i think you might have a few and uh yeah what else say go to the patreon uh go to the second gate lots of fun coming up there as always follow us on twitter follow or i don't know maybe don't follow the the atv guy don't bother him but

like just bother the atv don't buy don't do that yeah yeah seems like a good guy twitter and just positive in a world of darkness like leave him alone yeah or you know like let him let him make the first move let him decide when he's ready to be in the public never learned yeah uh sorry sorry we're also just shitting on the al cap estate too like his son's alive that's the guy that got the pr job and we were like i'm sure that was just a handout yeah right just crying silently in his car my dad was a genius there is so much this is the most uh the litigian ever that's not a word is it podcast right lawyer go through it before it comes out yes yeah yeah you should all of your all of the patreon money we've got like 95 of it goes to the lawyer yeah you wouldn't believe the shit we say in most

episodes no that's true yeah it's crazy we'll tell you all of it and we see you at the anaheim show uh hey thanks for listening. Holy shit, that was something. Okay, bye. Double whammy, double whammy. Have a heck of a day. A hogwash. Forever Dog. This has been a Forever Dog production.

Executive produced by Mike Carlson, Jason Sheridan, Scott Gairdner, Brett Boehm, Joe Cilio, and Alex Ramsey. Engineered and mastered by Alex Arche. For more original podcasts, please visit foreverdogpodcast.com and subscribe to our shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Keep up with the latest Forever Dog news by following us on Twitter and Instagram at Forever Dog Team and liking our page on Facebook.