Podcast: The Ride - Downtown Disney Ordeal 4-1

Episode Date: November 20, 2019

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FOREVER! DOG! Darkness falls out on the street, evil rears its head Get your crazy shake to go and your fried donut bread The villains threaten this sacred place, this downtown shopping mall We must defend the Lego store and the Splitsville bowling balls The Downtown Disney or do you? We must protect our AP discount meals

The Downtown Disney or do you? What secrets does the Earl of Sandwich conceal? Boys, boys, my cousin has been taken by evil forces that have inhabited Downtown Disney In order to find them them you will need to thoroughly discuss every aspect of the mall stores restaurants both of the starbucks we have 18 daily very necessary episodes in which to do so i will be there to guide you and keep your conversations from getting too off topic or boring the downtown disney ordeal why do we do this to ourselves uh welcome to podcast the ride the downtown disney ordeal level four stage one my name is

mike carlson joining me as always scott gerner hi and jason sheridan we got stuff to address but something just happened yeah something just happened here that's i i rushed to hit record on now jason's sign we were wondering we're waiting to record and jason's sort of over by the trash walk to the kitchen water happened when you have this new hand soap in your kitchen that smells amazing and i was trying to like make a note of what it was uh okay we've been recording all day and you're taking soap smell time. The madness he's setting in. But the most important thing that just happened is that you said I was getting a glass for my sucker. Yeah, I got a little lolly.

Getting a sucker cup. So he has a glass from the cupboard and he's just, he's rested his sucker, which is covered in caramel and it's a green, it's a green apple. It's a green apple caramel one. A good sucker. Nothing knocking against the sucker. It's a good sucker, but it takes a green it's a green apple caramel one a good sucker nothing knocking against the sucker but it takes a while to get through and i didn't want to be here like like on the show like a whole thing i did it now obviously i make that noise all right so there is just to set the stage for you jason's taking like a especially long time what's happening

i'm getting my sucker cup it's almost as good as if he was just like i'm baking six donuts like what the oven would be on that would be inefficient you want to make them in large batches so like and obviously i'm eating three of those so i don't want you guys to just have one each like that's fair um okay but that that immediately had to be said But the big headline is We're back We're back We made it We made it out of the underworld

We're back in the main feed The free feed We made it back We're on solid free ground again If you have not If you didn't Accompany us If you weren't selfless enough

To accompany us On our journey to the underworld And to help us through it And you haven't heardless enough To accompany us On our journey To the underworld And to help us through it And you haven't heard from us In three days All I can say is It's been a hell of a three days

Yeah we defeated A comedy icon Of a boss I don't even really want to say To reveal Cause you should go back And you should subscribe To our Patreon

To find out Who we're talking about But he's a businessman He's an entrepreneur He's a businessman uh he's a entrepreneur sunglass icon sunglass icon uh let's just yeah that's it's it was it was something that's all we'll say and uh and we met and we hey we met a lot of friends down there you know you can poke around you can look hey you can find out what we did and maybe even check out what we did if you go to patreon.com slash podcast the ride. And the good thing about the Patreon is we also have a ton of episodes not about this mall.

Yeah. Going backwards. So, yeah, if you're tired ofist, you can also go listen to the episodes about rides or robots or people in anthropomorphic animal suits. Which the main feed will have again someday. We promise. Yeah. I'll make sure of it. We promise.

After this. So, we have now made it out. It is, how many are we now? What we were initially thinking was going to be 15 episodes. That is now 18. So we're not as far through as we thought. We got six more to go. Six to go.

There were three extras. That was a surprise. We thought there'd be three sprung up like funguses. Yes. So we have failed at our attempt to be much shorter than City Walk to go easier on ourselves. And now we are adding up to just one less. Merciful one short. Merciful for you, the listener.

Cruel for us, the podcasters. But on our journey back to the above place, we are, thank God, joined by our spirit guide, the Sector Keeper. Boys, boys! You give me strength! You're back! We're back! You were there, too! Yes, we're all back! Of course, yes, yes, we're back

where we should be. Free! It is a tough term. And I don't know that free is accurate, either. Accurate? What do you mean? sure it is a tough and i don't know that free is accurate either uh accurate what do you mean what do you mean well we're in this mall where we've got to finish the mall before we can be truly oh yeah i see what you're saying no no one is free and especially not your cousin to recap what is happening the level keeper is still missing and the level

wouldn't you know it? The level keeper also not in the underworld. Yes, we just keep missing the level keeper. Just keep missing, but you're close. I promise you. You're close. I bet we're not one level close. Probably two. Maybe more.

More? Are you going to spring on us that we have to do the harbor businesses? God, don't give him an idea, Mike. Don't give him an idea you want to spring on us that we have to do the harbor Businesses God don't give him an idea Don't give him an idea you want to happen I want to do it The harbor hoedown I would like to combine it with the downtown Disney ordeal

Is separate This is in a future year When you've found a third coast Who is more amenable to this kind of thing Get that guy anthony geo maybe he'll be down for this when you take a six month uh leave of absence to do snl bahrain to do the digital shorts um sounds good oh my god i wish i could only dream of jobs of that yeah nature fingers crossed yeah um but no here we are back in we didn't wait and we aren't even like we haven't

even like crossed the bridge yet like to the like you know if you're going west in downtown disney we aren't even like to the part that goes over the street we're still pretty far back right like we paused pretty like mid uh mid mall where where are we going now today you're going to level four stage one okay boys would you like to know where you're visiting uh yeah yeah you must discuss and review to ideally free the level keeper all right we know we got it okay yeah we know okay it doesn't end today i don't think no i don doesn't end today, I don't think, by the way. No, I don't think so either. I don't think it will.

Black Tap Window Service Spot, Splitsville Luxury Lanes, Tortilla Joe's, and other fountains. Boys, no. Sorry, we have to. We have to. You're there.

It's part of the mission you gave us. So, sorry. We already did. Be careful and keep your mouths closed. We will. No staff for us. We already did whatever the fuck is it called? Crazy shake black tap?

Yes. What's the sit down? Black tap. It was so long ago now. Craft burgers and shakes. Right. But this is a different This is the service window

This is the window behind it You just get shakes to go Either standard shakes Or crazy shakes This fell into a different Yes Level This is a

Yeah cause it's Look it's You know it's in a different spot So that's why there's a different Zoning Cause all this is basically Sort of zoning I think Edwin is smelling

My sucker In the air My lolly This is why you need a sucker cup To protect As a moat zoning because all this is basically sort of zoning i think edwin is smelling my sucker in the air my law you need a sucker cup jason as a moat from jason is so worried about the dog i'm worried jason might uh just like shove him over to get him away from his sucker they start growling at each other every episode you and me become very similar we're both childlike in our wonder yes yeah that's true uh so yeah that's a different so yeah we're going to discuss the service window versus the actual sit-down restaurant it's just the service window now it's interesting they they have figured out a way to do the create they give you a plastic cup with like a shelf on top if you're getting a crazy shake to go. But I think it's a limited selection of crazy shakes.

I don't think it's the full ones. Right. And it's also it's a dollar more or so for the shake at the window. Because you got to account for the margins on those extra special cups. Right. Because you get to keep those cups because you get to keep those cups keep those cups so yeah this is a forced buy of a souvenir cup essentially into the park with you yes because because if you think about it obviously you're going to walk around with your crazy shake

when you're inside it's just a glass you know that they take back and they wash yeah but obviously like you're not going to have to bring back a glass to the service window like that would be absurd it's a plastic it's a whole other skid they need to order but these custom glasses right so but this you could take and it's like a plastic glass yes so you could take a crazy shake into the park with you which i did not do i should have now that i'm thinking about it uh and try to take it on a ride perhaps yeah i mean it sounds like a blast those shakes are like the crazy ones are like 14 bucks there's still a few places in disney world or disneyland where you can get a meal for the the price of one milkshake the earl and shuddered robert

oh no oh no oh we don't i don't think we even know what's ahead the level keepers warned me of him okay oh boy um the standard shakes are nine dollars and i always laugh thinking about pulp fiction and uh vincent vega being so blown away of like $5 milkshake. This better be a good, pretty good milkshake. And doesn't that seem quaint now when we're charging $9? Quentin should do a special edition where he changes the amount so it matches today's times for inflation. And maybe he says like $9, what are we at the black tab when he put when he dies like whoever buys his film rights that is something that will probably happen oh god he'll start to put advertisements in classic movies that's the way we're headed i

think well i think we're i think we're headed to one of the shittiest movies ever filmed pulp fiction 2 oh my god you're right whatever nightmare isn't there another travolta like there was like a singer guy named like joey travolta or something the joey travolta will be in it yeah oh man i didn't even think about that samuel m jackson the brother the the first i in um fiction will be a Roman numeral two. Quentin Tarantino's dad and Al Pacino's dad, Sal Pacino, teamed up for a movie. So on the directed DVD, I forget what

the name of it is, the directed DVD case, it says Tarantino and Pacino. Come on. So there's already stuff like that going on. I just saw the trailer for the jesus movie the john taturo directed big lebowski spinoff directed by john taturo what what john taturo is taking it upon himself to make a spinoff of the big lebowski and we're not talking to a tara reed already did this with those laughmeisters at funny or die big lebowski too this that's not what we're talking about it's not what we're not talking to a terror read already did this with those laughmeisters at funny or die

big lebowski too this that's not what we're talking about it's not what we're talking about sure all the listeners remember of course all the listeners remember so i honestly you're right about pulp fiction too as soon as quentin terniota dies oh god they're all getting i wonder just cranked through i wonder if he can put something in like i wonder if there's like a click he can like maybe 50 years after he dies he can keep it protected or something we'll see maybe not everything's gonna erode they'll make it when he's alive maybe um miramax harvey weinst who owns it i don't know company bill cosby they bought the miramax library is that right i don't

know if it's in the light who is the production that we're gonna for sure oh man if disney what disney rules disney's disney's small family company it's co it's i don't even think that was true when you were live um pulp fiction 2 a stitch in time before it goes into the disney plus vault forever and stitches in it sure you know what honestly that's fun yeah sure that yeah yeah yeah yeah he free yeah he's he's like scrambling or he like bites the uh the gimp butt. Yeah, that's cute. Yeah. He gets the it gets Tim Roth to reach in the bag. His wallet is the one that says

right? That's how Stitch talks. Jason animal sounds. Yeah, it's been a runner. So black tap. Does this cover us us we talked about these shakes already yes so yeah basically the gist is there's a service window and you just go up there you pay an extra

dollar and you get a glass to take home essentially uh and it's the same shake as you get inside for the most part they're a limited menu yeah but uh yeah it's that's the gist of it i don't know really what else just shakes shakes to go moving on we cool i guess we could move on hang on oh my god what we get to move on to uh you know what i really quick i'd like to say that this is you know these like weird classifications of areas that they don't use anymore that i've been bringing up uh they this area i bet y'all didn't even know i'll keep my tea hidden from the dog who got interested in it immediately as i pull out my old trusty disney magazine from spring 2001 what's on back of

magazine uh oh yeah you noticed this when i pulled it out before, Center Keeper. It's a little distracting that the side that you're looking at from your chair has a full-page back-of-magazine ad that is for the 2001 Toyota Sienna. You're distracted by it because it is a black and white photo of a naked baby sleeping on the arm of a kind of a buff man. And this is an ad for the Toyota Sienna. I know I'm just ghost of child, but this is weird. It's definitely weird. It's a little and gettys ish. We talked a little and get Geddes down in the underworld.

So, hey, get ahead of the Patreon for that. It's very strange. It's not a good way to hold a baby remotely, just with its head down and it's in your palm. Yeah. It's a creepy baby, too. I don't know. It's the back of a family magazine. Yes, yeah, yeah.

And obviously baby nudity you judge differently because babies are nude more often. But it is still, it can be very creepy, especially when it's this very hazy, glossy black and white photo. And then the bizarre tagline, give them love, compassion, sheet metal, and steel. What? I don't know. We'll tweet a picture of that that's uh strange get it out there that's the 2001 toyota sienna give it to your baby the babies who the naked babies who grew up in toyota siennas are now adults this baby we're looking at can vote today. Yeah. So vote.

The most important election of your lifetime, baby, is coming up. So, yeah. Vote or die, baby. That's coming back. Give the world love, compassion, and cheat metal and steel. Curl, surf, or die. Or what was it? No, it was no, no. snooker die i'm sorry we've been doing this too long it's yeah we should we should say by the way i've never have we recorded more than two podcasts threads in a row we've been recording all day

because we're trying to get these done faster and and it's hitting me. I want to do it every recording now. I mean, yeah, there's a loopiness that's setting in, but it's truly making me wonder, after I finish every sentence, did the previous sentence make sense? Just tell me if it didn't. I think we would jump all over you if it didn't. Probably.

So I think you're doing fine. Sometimes I find myself staring off, and then brought back suddenly. From commutes that become learning sessions to dishwashing filled with laughs, podcasts can help you make the most out of your everyday. And when it comes to everyday spending, you can count on the PC Insider's World Elite MasterCard to help you earn the most PC Optimum points everywhere you shop.

The PC Insider's World Elite MasterCard, the card for living unlimited. Conditions apply to all benefits. Visit PCFinancial.ca for details. You're just like the listener. Nonsense. Everyone's fascinated by every word of this. Every description of a naked baby advertising a Toyota Sienna. What I was heading for is that this area is...

We don't even know the name of it anymore. It's called Paradise Plaza. It's the heart of downtown's high energy live music area. It is? I guess when we passed by it the other night, there was like an Andrews Sisters kind of group. Yeah. But the concerts have happened

elsewhere for a long time. They also strangely say the colorful fountain in the center is shaped like a California poppy, the state's official flower. But that's not where the poppy fountain is. No. Maybe this is a good time to talk about one of our topics, other fountains. Yeah.

You can't go out of order. No, no. Because of the fountain. Oh, because you. Okay, okay. But you have to. For my cousin, the level keeper. Yeah, you're drifting too.

There is a fountain in here. It's just like a shark fin. It's like a triangle. It's a fine fountain. And this is also where the deconstructed Donald sculpture is right now. They have all these deconstructed sculptures that when you look at them at the correct

angle, they form. You can see the character. But from the side, it just looks like pieces. It's like horrifying disembodied pieces on posts. I think they're cool. The sector keeper didn't really like them. I couldn't figure it out. Like a magic eye?

Like a magic eye. I didn't have the angle. I'm too little. You weren't tall in it and we needed to lift you up um you're still very short i acknowledge that when you look at those uh-oh i dropped something i acknowledge when you look at those from the wrong angle it's kind of horrifying there's a there's a grant morrison writer he's a comic book writer uh an issue of multiversity where who's who's uh the original dr manhattan not the analog oh um captain adam captain adam yeah he takes he's

trying to understand humanity and what life is and he like takes a dog apart and understands like because he's trying to figure out what makes it and why is it uh why is it a thing and yeah so it's all the component it's all the component pieces of it and so he's trying to figure out what makes it and why is it a thing. Yeah, so it's all the component pieces. It's all the component pieces of it. Does he put it back together? He does put it back together because he's all powerful. But it's as if someone was like, why is Donald fun? I must rip this duck apart and look at its pieces to understand it completely. And then you're looking at the pieces of Donald and you're like, no.

Because that's what happens to people when they see this character rip a dog apart. There is a beak. I do not understand why it is funny. Right. His bottom. Yeah, right. Yeah, for sure. Well, the seat.

His thick seat. Oh, yeah, we switched our terminology. Yeah, we call it a seat now to make it more friendly. Yeah. That's our word for, well, I can't, I don't even want to say the words anymore. For your rear. So we wanted to keep it, because I said a dirty word referring to it. What did you say?

ASS. So. Thanks for deconstructing the word. Yeah, I wanted to break it. I don't want to offend people. It feels good to be back. Feel free. Do you want to say a swear right now? Yeah, do you want to go for it you can

say it out more than we are yeah go for it okay i want to say shit oh wow okay that feels good oh he's dragging his jewel oh big hit What flavor is that? Oh, yeah. That's the stuff. Okay. He's not even listening to you. He's so cool. He's just ignoring you. Fall asleep?

Okay. That flavor was pumpkin spice. It's just the season. Well, it's a little past it, honestly. Is it? No, it's November. All right. You're right.

We're still. Yeah. Pumpkin spice mint right it's all everything has mint in it thanksgiving and christmas yeah so uh we now so paradise plaza the heart of the mall we're finally at the heart as we deconstruct it into parts to try to understand we're trying we're doing that without that we're trying to understand it by pulling it apart and seeing all the different pieces of it. So there's its wine district and there's its Paradise Plaza.

Okay. But also we're learning it doesn't make sense when you take pieces away. We are learning the same thing that Captain Adam learned. Yeah, the weight of years pulling this park down. Parts of the 90s, parts of the 2000s, parts of the 2010s. Right, it doesn't add up. We're learning the great lesson of life. Why is it fun there?

We still don't know. We still don't know and maybe we'll never know. Maybe the heart will help though because we, I think, did one of the best things that we have done in either the saga or the ordeal.

We went to Splitsville. Yeah. Splitsville. Splitsville. And this was a big milestone for us it was the very first time we got something free on disney property yeah yeah well it was yes a press opportunity we said you know we're a podcast and we'd love to come in and review we'd love to check everything out i don't know if i said review but check everything out you know we're journal we're theme park journalists and they said sure yeah we're great yeah right and them being sort of a separate organization i guess like disney is never their own disney is so cold

to us in general and of course they're wrong to be because we are they need us in a lot of ways they don't realize it yet but as we establish cold also to jenny nicholson to our friend the new way yeah of uh alt theme park media they are pretending doesn't exist yes yeah and i mean like you're there's other places like we're am i jealous of fresh baked disney the youtube channel that gets into the stuff of course i am very yeah but does he have ghost child saying shit in his content? I will say that for sure all the other theme park media, there is yet to be

a ghost child on any of this stuff. Jim and Len have not had a ghost child. A dusty sage mice chat, no ghost child hasn't happened. So we are innovating.

Disney doesn't understand it. Bumper car boys. Bumper car boys. Fuck the bumper. Excuse me. Screw the bumper car boys. I the f word i'm so sorry sometimes it feels good sometimes i'll be honest sometimes it feels good to be bad so i just saw a tweet though i think they are prepping a series that involves a zombie child those fuckers those

bumper car boys ripping us off left and right. They're covering. Is he doing freaking zombies? I think, I don't know. The bumper car boys are doing. No, no, no. Bumper car boys are. Because they're doing a 25 part series about everything in Hershey, Pennsylvania. Oh, well. They better not get to the Harbor Hootenanny before us. Yeah, if we don't get to it within. Hoedown.

Within the next two weeks. Bumper car boys are going to steal it. Those fucking bumper. Excuse me. Those freaking bumper car boys. gonna steal it those fucking bumper excuse me those freaking bumper car boys yeah i like to knock them on their seat yeah kick them right in the seat i say so splitsville the bowling splitsville but i'm happy to say despite the uh free stuff we had a great time it's a great time and we are not lying no we haven't been bought i already would have said nice things about splitsville because i had not done the bowling component of it i had not done like

the you know the main thing you go there for but i'd done it just as a as a restaurant because there's an outdoor patio and a nice bar and uh uh it just being one of the newer restaurants on property and it's immediately such a big boon to the downtown district disney district uh and i think my wife would agree like with suddenly it's like oh my god you can actually get uh their meals outside of our beloved trio of flatbreads at uh at the uva bar i think food was a little more slim pickings and with black tap and ballast point like it's all been improving so if you don't even do the bowling part just like you can get good beer good drinks good food at this place bowling alley like a cool mid-century art directed yes like

aesthetically this first appearance of aesthetics yes it might be the first aesthetics i like anywhere in downtown disney it's got this mod 60s vibe um my oh yeah sure yeah yeah um but i think it's open before so it was like it was so rare to see like you could take a picture of something and in downtown disney and you like the way the picture looks i first went there just solo actually and sat in the outside area where they have little concerts and stuff keeping the promise of paradise plaza alive yes they'll have like an acoustic guitar out there uh a guy who's fine um and the the wall that the musicians perform in front of is this like super jetson's e like the little like 60s slivers it actually reminds me of like uh like the way

old like churches from the 60s look it's like cool church architecture oh yeah i see that i get and you pass by that or you see the monorail going by it's like it feels like a little it feels like a little slice of 60s tomorrowland we were sitting by that giant window inside and the monorail would go right by it and it was great so neat yeah you got to see the money yeah it is it does feel like is it the most stylish exterior in downtown disney i think it might be probably yeah and recently redone because it was the house of blues r.i.p you can hear our thoughts in the underworld um so it was they moved into this massive facility house of blues which i will say i was never a fan of the aesthetics of at any location that's a bit of a mess uh but this place looks so cool like they they took it over and pretty quickly uh gave it this cool mod vibe it's's a good retro, but that feels current too.

Good stuff. Before you even walk in the door. Yes. We walked in the door and were fitted for bowling shoes and taken to a lane, which the 60s vibe continues. I really love that big, is there a big orange or am I thinking of just a big bowling ball? It's an orange that has bowling ball holes in it for your fingers.

That is sort of a hidden Mickey a little bit too. Oh yeah, yeah. I think. A bit of a Mickey. Oh, that's even in the description I just pulled from the website. Dynamic hand-painted murals stretching along entire walls contain subtle hidden Mickeys. This place, also by the way, while I'm looking at their stats, 600 seats, two craft cocktail bars, two open kitchens, 25 flat screen TVs, and live music 365 days a year. Wow.

Has your family parted ways with you for Christmas? They said never again. Don't even try coming here. Go to Splitsville and see a concert. Once my mom heard me say the F word twice in this episode, she might say that to me. You are not welcome. I do have a brief bit of bad news that i think is easily fixed when i tried to pull up the menu on the disneyland website it appears that stitch has eaten it oh isn't that

go disney.com's fault maybe it is that's often what happens if you can't find things but now what would that have sounded like? Okay, good to know. Just for study purposes. If you reach for his sucker in the cup, that's what you'll hear. If you're a dog who reaches for his sucker. There's a very small crack in this cup too and the sticker stick,

the sucker stick rests perfectly in it. If you chose, that's why you needed the time should we sell perfect should we sell a ringtone of jason doing that biting me from my pocket yeah and it'll be a picture of jason perfect stitch what i was doing at the other this doesn't sound like that at all no yeah it doesn't sound like him at all but he kind of talks does he yeah family someone hire me for voice acting please do i have to pay like 300 bucks to take a voice acting class where they're like oh the characters you would best try out for is like dumb piece of shit like right that's what those classes that is

what happens they'll be like oh you would be the nag like they'll say that you would be fat idiot i don't know if they say that but maybe some but fat sounding voice yeah oh and then Jason will go there and like, Stitch, you would be good for Stitch. Hey! Cool. I remember when Stitch, as we covered Bay, a non-Downtown Disney related topic in the Patreon a little bit ago, the castle cake. And we also talked about when Stitch teepeed Cinderella Castle and the teepee said, do you remember? Stitch is king.

Oh. Stitch is king! It just gets worse and worse. Stitch is king! Wait, you know what you sound like is the Rob Schneider in the water bowl. You can do it! Stitch is king!

You can do it yeah you can do it i'm sorry snl treated you that way so so yes we were given a lane uh and yeah that retro vibes i think we were on uh we were in like six seven eight and there's a little like this little spark you know what it looks like actually is like the opening sequence of the big lebowski oh yeah i'm predating john turturro's jesus yes um yeah cool cool little uh light and fixtures monorail's going by, as we said. Big narrow tables. And we went hog wild.

Appetizers. Yeah. Main dinners. Yeah. Drinks and dessert. And then the appetizer portion is where we found, and I don't even want to, it's not even my place to announce it. Jason, I will let you. I call the, you're talking about the fig and pig flatbread?

I am talking about the fig and pig flatbread. Which I very quickly went, this might be the best thing on property. Like this might be the best tasting thing. It was so good. Yes, you're nodding your head. Yeah. Boys, boys, it was delicious. yes you're not mad yeah it boys boys it was delicious it was a plus it was crazy prosciutto fig spread goat cheese fresh mozzarella uh maraschino onions dried figs

topped with dressed arugula delicious the bread was delicious the meat the cheese the fake all of it was so good i think it's a recent addition too i think it hasn't been on the menu for that long so keep it going and i usually don't like that fancy pizza oh yeah i'm more of a traditional like classic cheese just like kevin mcallister just like kevin but this really hit the spot it was really good they also have a full pizza menu too um which i regret it not getting one of the because this flatbread the crust was really good they also have a full pizza menu too um which i regret it not getting one of the because this flatbread the crust was so good on this i should mention or we should mention i came with yeah have we not said that officially yes we need a fourth for the bowling

yes and thank you for bringing me thank you for taking me. Thank you for taking me. We were there alone. Especially when everyone was staring. Oh, yeah. Sorry. Oh, you mean when there was a ghost around. Yeah. And everybody was, is that what you're referring to? Yeah. But what, that's, I'd say, what a testament to the service at Splitsville.

Right. They didn't discriminate. Yeah, nicely. Everyone, it was a big problem. You were trying to pick up the ball and your hand was just going right through it. Yeah. And that was a whole kind of embarrassing thing. Right. They handle it. Discriminate. Yeah, nicely. Everyone, it was a big problem. You were trying to pick up the ball and your hand was just going right through it. Yeah. And that was a whole kind of embarrassing thing. Yeah. That you'd stick your hand above the little fan

and just get shot up into the ceiling. We'd lose you for like half an hour. Yeah. Or when I had sangria. Oh. We didn't want to talk about that. We were invited back at this point that we came in here. They were nice enough to treat us.

And then we gave alcohol to a minor. A ghost minor. Sorry, Splitsville. The real issue, though, is that you drank it and went right through you. And it was on the seat. Right onto the seat. It went right onto the seat. They didn't really drink it.

Did you get any vibes from it anyway, even though it was mostly passing right through you? Yeah, it tastes like juice. Which is kind of what you're at. We were talking about how you love Capri Sun and stuff. And I've already had the flavor sangria before. Okay.

Jeez. You have so many. I don't think one is repeated. I think you've had three different jewels. Yeah. Rambo belt. Look at my belt. Oh, shit. Whoa.

It's like Rambo, but with jewels. It's like a Rambo belt with jewel cartridges. You have a whole, you have like a. One across my chest. Yeah, across your chest, too. Oh, yeah. You opened your hoodie. Oh, man.

Wow. Jeez. You're stacked. I mean, you opened your hoodie. Oh, man. Wow. Geez. You're stacked. I mean, you look really cool. Whoa. Lined up all the way up your legs. Attached like a holster attached to your Scottie Pippen socks. Yeah.

Geez. So, this is heavy. Yeah. Yeah. But they're like the chains of Marley. Oh, yeah, because you're you're addicted the the scenes you were in you in a because we did free you but then you're a ghost again so it's your addiction from going to hell that's what oh you're still ago it's just

we kept you out of the i was always in trouble clarifying what was occurring in and out of the temporal worlds what you walk between worlds. Yes, very much. Because you were very gung-ho about the job when we left you at the end of the City Walk saga. But then you kind of regressed. Yeah, it's kind of like

the genie at the end of Aladdin when he frees him, but then he's sort of just the genie the rest of the time. Yeah, and Return of Jafar, he comes back, still got all his powers and stuff. Yeah, he should free the genie

and he should have just become a dude. Yeah, that would have been nice. That would have made sense. So like kind of became a dude but now you're back to being ghost so really it's a lot like aladdin uh spoiler alert that is what happened in the live action one you have just forgotten uh i do know oh well i was thinking about the cartoon i i would bet a little money that in the sequel to aladdin he'll be a genie again oh yeah live action oh yeah we were talking about reboots the lion the lion king is back aladdin is back beauty and the beast all your favorite movies as a kid are are back but but filmed with uh human actors why uh yeah i mean you were asking a question about bringing things back um oh you said money i think yeah probably money is it's a conservative move really if you think about it i

mean it's good it's good you'd like it because they just do all of the same things that the previous movie did except for like one token nod to feminism. But otherwise, it's just exactly the same. So it's the movie you remember watching. Oh, I'll go see it. You don't have to do any new work and like learn, see anything new in a new movie. Keeps my brain from working hard. Yeah. Also, technically, if you were a child in the 90s you you would be well of age by now so

splitsville don't worry we didn't actually serve you didn't serve a minor don't worry you're in the clear oh yeah and also he's a ghost he didn't he's a ghost uh oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah but it was fun yeah it was fun it was very fun to to bowl with it. Maybe the only complaint that you might have about this place is that, and it's hardly a complaint because you were eating, as we said, very delicious food. But then you were also bowling. But this leaves you in a germ quandary. Yes.

Because one of the germiest things you can do is bowl. Yeah, I went to the bathroom, I think, five to seven times during the meet. Because it was close to us, luckily, but not all the lanes are. I think there needs to be. do is bowl yeah i went to the bathroom i think five to seven times during the meet because it was close to us luckily very close yes i think there needs i'm just trying to figure out a solution to this problem maybe all food that you have to eat with a fork yeah because then that's okay but if it's like that would get rid of our flatbread but okay maybe it's like maybe smaller pieces of flatbread that you could poke with a fork there's little like toothpicks yeah because i had a chicken sandwich which was good but i had

to i was like okay maybe one hand i was i think it was affecting my bowling honestly is thinking about my hands i picked up one ball and it was greasy i was trying to keep a different hand so i don't know who greased up that ball. How heavy were you going? The green one, 13 pounds. I don't think I did 13. I think 12 is as heavy as I went. Oh, I went nine. Yeah, I go lighter.

Yeah. Ooh, I'm strong. Yeah, clearly. We should reveal scores though i mean i don't have them all written down but you did not you were you did not defeat us then with your strength no no you gave me strength we gave we gave you strength by playing so well right um in the only round that we completed in full the winner was mike yes the the unattainable earth shattering score of 105 if you beat us handily with 105 very embarrassing for all of us we are not the jesus no i forget i think i got my strike that round

i think i got one strike and then we didn't finish another game yeah we didn't quite get there we ran out of time so it does feel like it would be nice maybe to eat if we it makes sense if you're going like appetizers and drinks that's almost perfect yeah that's a meal i think is what slowed you down maybe bowl around and then eat or vice versa yes you go into the front part and that's the only thing it's like if you're if you're having your precious bowling time and you're getting a big meal and i want it i feel like i want to enjoy the meal a little more even too because then i felt like well we got to get another round and then we did not get another round we didn't we didn't quite get there um but i mean part of that being that yeah when you were torn between food and the bowling game that

needs to proceed which i think was especially a problem for jason well to tear you away uh spoiler alert this is what uh i this is where i eat it too much and got a tummy ache uh and it wasn't lack of quality everything very good very high quality yeah but when it's on the house it's a little hard to stop um and i don't really often eat in this fashion of like appetizer and entree and dessert and a beer yeah like i do like two of those like i'll have an entree and a drink or an appetizer and this like i this was a lot of even split we share the appetizers and just for uh completion's sake the other appetizer we had the grilled avocado with ahi tuna uh very interesting like a full avocado topped with tuna and sticky rice

on the bottom wonton chips i had a bacon cheeseburger mike you had the blackjack chicken sandwich right i did yes um scott you had a you had a sushi roll that was great fantasy roll So a place that has like all kinds of stuff and sushi, that sushi might not be so good, but it was, it was so good. Sector Keeper, what did you have? Uh, I had the. Did you have the Power Bowl? Power Bowl, chicken Power Bowl. You insisted on getting, you were feeling a little low-key from extra juuling that day.

Yeah, yeah. I had a, my head, my head was killing me. But Power Bowl was good. Yeah, Powerball was really good yeah yeah yeah did it give you strength i guess you could say it gave me strength yeah it gave you power i guess you could say it gave me power i think a good choice because uh you eat it with a fork. Yeah, you guys got that. And then we split the super sundae and the Ghirardelli brownie. Yes. Very good.

I have a picture of you alone at the table, spoon in hand, looking like you want to die, going in for the dessert, which I think you felt compelled to at that point. It was really good. It was good. I just think you would stuff yourself. I you would brownie with ice cream and this it was warm it was soft sometimes it's very easy to get a stale brownie at like a restaurant when you get to they dump a stale brownie or they just reheated an old one but this one was really good um it was a real to do this dessert order there was a real war room vibe and I think

you were maybe off to bowl or starting to bowl or something when the server said, do you guys want to pick your desserts?

And like, Jason, desserts are, okay, let's, and I like roll up the sleeves. Yeah.

Let's get down to brass tacks. You kept bringing up the cake, whatever cake was around. It says a generous portion of the chef's featured cake. You were like, we've got to find.

Giant cake. I want to know a cake. We've got to find out what the chef's cake. When we learned it was carrot cake, your heart broke. I always did like that bowler who was like, I did that mad bowler. Oh, yeah. Who do you think you are? I am.

Yeah. But not in celebration. It was more like well, the game has gotten complicated. What do we do now? I was hoping they were going to say like a Boston cream. I'm fine with carrot cake. I'm sure it was a delicious carrot cake and probably

a little less intense than what we got. Than a giant friend. A giant Sunday. You want to do both of them. You're trying and you're trying to but we're trying to do physical activity yeah and jump into these things the bacon cheeseburger was good i'd say that the top bacon cheeseburgers at the resort or top cheeseburgers period at the resort now black craft pretty solid uh black tap craft black craft burgers and beers excuse me okay black tap solid uh this also very solid clubhouse 55 uh very good as well so those are the tops they're a little

pricier but you're paying for quality jason's cheaper that's my cheeseburger if you want a cheeseburger at the disney resort i mean it's not my number one place to get a cheeseburger by any means what is your number one uh probably just go to in and out burger i'm an out burger man huh hmm um that's interesting question i do like that steakhouse 55 one though uh yeah i yes i made a joke when we were bowling that you were going to start just when your turn came up because when we got the food, you just start rolling gutter balls to get back to the food really quickly. Yeah. But the opposite happened.

You started bowling really well when the food came. I got two strikes in a row. You got two strikes in a row as soon as the food came. So your brain was like, the fastest way back to the food is rolling strikes. Because then I don't have to wait for the second frame. Sure. So you bowled better in that moment when the food first came than you did the whole game. And could not replicate.

I said with bowling and pool, I'm like an idiot or a savant. And there's no in between. I'm either very good or just atrocious. I have a similar feeling about some of those games as well. But I was like like you did the opposite with the same result same results yeah like it was amazing honestly i did roll some gutter balls though yeah but that was later when you were low then you were low when the food came you were hitting the flow yeah you would have been yeah you could i think any sport in the moment when food was about to

come you would have been perfect at it for those five to ten minutes i i fucked up though i should have gotten another i should have gotten like a pizza and had a slice or two and i would have been right level of full and then had a hearty lunch for the next day i was off my game because i was distracted by an actual game you could have done off my bullshit but i think you were at the height of your any of any power i think i think you're you're right about what you're saying but i think that you would you were the reason you bowled so well is because you didn't do that is what i'm trying to say maybe potentially i think you could have beaten sammy duvall at a water skiing contest in that moment oh yeah maybe it was to get back to a

sunday yes if there was a sunday sitting on the beach at the pollination all right folks i don't got all day let's do this slapping sammy in the water punching a gator like not today not today friend you're not getting me. Flips over, lands on the beach Sunday. Oh, and our drinks. I had a mango, a Golden Road mango cart. Delicious. Oh, yeah. Whatever was the rotating draft, and I don't know what it was.

You had an IPA. But I think I've gotten the rotating draft more than once there, and it's been good every time. Oh, I had some sort of berry drink, and I can't remember the name of it. It was lavender? Was it lavender? You had the berry lavender? Berry mint?

Berry, no, not mint. That's your thing, not mine. You got a berry mint on there somewhere. I think I had a berry lavender thing of some kind. It was just good juice. Yeah, my Sanrio was really good. Yeah, it was just juice, which is now a bad connotation which

we know from the jamba episode juice is like a juice is what they call uh vape vape juice so you got like uh bandolero is it bandoleros of juice yeah the woman next to us asked me if i was having sangria oh yeah she wanted to know and she didn't want to know if it was good and then you were like, yeah, it is good and then I think you were like quietly like I don't know if it's good or not. She wanted, she seemed like she had her mind made up. I couldn't tell if she trusted me.

Yeah, she, I wonder if she noticed that you were a ghost. She was very polite though so she didn't. Yes. I got up to everyone at at splitsville that nobody said a ghost and jumped in the arms of whoever they were with the the guy bowling next to us was jacked yeah and when i got a strike he was very he made me feel real good he was like yeah and he gave me that big high five and i was like what a story we're all in this together i'm just saying you made me feel

like they're having a good time at splitsville yeah it is it was good yeah vibes are good i think there's yeah there seem to be some some bigger parties going on ours was just a party of four right but it was a rager it was i they yeah it's a huge menu it seems like everything is done well so if you have like picky eaters or like people can't agree on stuff yeah uh yeah don't be biased that it is a bowling alley because it's fun yeah and you only have you can half commit to the bowling and not super get so it's for late people just eat there yeah yeah as i've done several times it's a great patio i don't know this this thing that this was all taken up by a club that I'd probably never want to go to, and

now it is just a relaxing open-air bar. Good stuff. This is one of those improvements of downtown Disney. I think the downtown Disney ordeal three years ago would have been a much more sordid affair, but we have a lot more nice things to say about pretty decent restaurants thanks to what they've done lately That's true, yeah, I agree Does that make it more fun? I don't know

It's better if it's worse It's no CityWalk CityWalk, bigger ups and downs Actually, no, just bigger downs Yeah I think we can say Nothing at either of these two things Has been as fun as Splitsville

Hasn't't been the highlight of our daily series that's a good question uh specifically city walk or i mean indoor skydiving was interest that was a trick yeah but it's not it's fun no do it again for sure wasn't no i would go back to splitsville tonight yeah i would do indoor skydiving again, but I wouldn't expect... I'll say this. I would... I guess I... I would spend my own money happily at Splitsville.

At indoor skydiving, I spend it begrudgingly. Uh-huh. I hear that. No, that's... You're probably right. I'm just trying to think. I'm trying to think of even the promise.

Maybe Wizards at CityWalk is the only other thing I would rather maybe do. But didn't get to do only that was a nostalgia for a place we never were yeah right rock park no i know yeah but so even menchies like did you menchies you can sort of do whenever hey that's one by like was it men my hair cut Who was your enemy Sparky? Sparky Not Menchie Menchie was a good He took my place in heaven

That's right I'm so sorry yeah It's okay Okay Do you have any feelings offhand about Tortilla Joe? Do you? I do I'm just curious You know that is a character

I don't know if he's real or... Tortilla Joe. Yes, Tortilla Joe is a friend of my cousin's. Oh, okay. Yes. So would it be a problem if I said that I didn't particularly care for Tortilla Joe? Oh. Nothing against him.

I don't even know what he looks like. Well, it doesn't help that it is part of the patina restaurant group. Who have given us so much grief. Given us so many headaches. Oh, it's another patina. There you go. Patina. Patina.

It did not have my beloved little pepperoni cups that Naples does. Nipples? Naples. The pizza restaurant. They have the little pepperoni. they're from a while yeah yeah um no uh i i look i'm probably giving the short end of the stick of to tortilla joe am i the only one who's been uh in full disclosure yes i have not eaten a meal there uh i know people who really like it though yeah i think i've talked to other people um i went uh i think pre-ordeal i think aaron and i went and it was fine going down

uh but we okay we were like a tad pricey maybe and then we felt terrible all oh really it was a stomach issue yep oh um which doesn't befall me as much as both of you who i was just saying i feel like there's like 20 episodes where you guys have had stomach issues well again jason's number one stomach issue for sure i overindulged um i had no stomach i was i was recovering from a stomach thing last week but i wasn't uh on death's door like jason was after that meal well it's kind of like skydiving it's kind of like bowling or pool i either have an iron stomach or it's a fucking mess uh so if you have three beers it just ruins the next three days of your life yeah i don't drink a lot yeah i ticked

down to three not long ago that's my cap now a beer when we started this thing i could have downed four beer i don't 17 beer is beer is too heavy i get i can drink i can drink hard liquor what you have to look forward to growing up sector keeper yeah i can't wait to drink and feel bad for days split so splitsville and tortilla joe's both fall in that very narrow category of they'll validate your parking for five hours right that's what many do now well not so again i uh the the divide is uh you can if you spend twenty dollars at any establishment in downtown disney um you get that sorry this is uh disneyland.co.com is not oh that's not right yeah it is disney they have a.co.go.go yes oh there's a co oh no uh no disney we should talk about that at some point when disney bought go.com and still has the

backbone of all their internet on it that's right yeah that's why it's all go and they're still hanging on so i think i said this on an earlier episode you get three hours of parking if you spend a 20 minimum purchase at any quick service restaurant or merchandise locations or kiosks they will validate to get five hours it's table service but black tap and ballast point are not considered table service splitsville and tortilla joes are considered but you can go to naples and if you order at the bar and i did this once they validated with just drinks so if you get the right bartender. That's a good tip. You can get maybe not having to spend on a full meal. That's a good tip.

And if you buy two pizzas, you can get those three hours. Of course. We learned that a long time ago. We figured out the two pizzas story. The two pizzas story. And that happened. Two pizzas? Well, they're little. He saved one for later.

Is that right? Yes. Yeah, I saved one for later. In order to get free parking He got two pizzas one to go I tell you what every episode You and I man You live in the dream Oh what do you have?

Oh he's blowing rings It's Boston cream It was the cake I was hoping Splits well had Yeah it's gotta have mint It's gotta have mint to pass the law now Boston cream. It was the cake I was hoping Splitswell had. With mint? Yeah, it's got to have mint. It's got to have mint to pass the law now. I'm losing the sector keeper.

Uncle Jason's becoming his favorite. I got to do something good for you. You'll know. We might be blood brother. We might be brother. Two brothers? Two different brothers. Brothers. Even though you're already the brother of bugsy we determined who no

longer exists because he's are you also hugsy's brother hey man there's family you're born with and family fine you know ohana means family as stitch learned what did stitch say when he learned that family closer i guess it's closer i think that was a little better. You got to break in. I need to tell Jason about a pizza deal in the neighborhood. California Pizza Kitchen. Go in there, eat an entree. They'll let you take any pizza home for $5, and it's cookable pizza. Sector Keeper, this is out of bounds, clearly.

Objection. Wait, when you say cookable, you mean like par-baked? Like partially baked? Boys, boys, boys. Okay, sorry. All right, sorry, sorry. say, you mean like par-baked? Like partially baked? Boys, boys, boys! Sorry! The metal detectors are one boundary. The Honda Odyssey with the Star Wars

Galaxy Edge logo is the other. There's no CPK on Downtown Disney. The CPK is over at the Garden Walk. I gotta say, I prefer that Odyssey to the Sienna. I'll tell you what that picture is smut i can't believe they still sell it sienna i looked it up i thought be gone banished by the picture siennas were canceled yes before canceling was a thing in 2002

apparently before taste was a thing jeepers creepers um if anyone has some look we'll amend later if anyone has fond tortilla joe's thoughts i don't mean to i feel bad that i'm the sole voice here and that i had a bad experience um but i did and i have to speak my truth yeah that's okay i mean that's understandable yeah so shitty we like i've never regretted i don't think a disney meal as much as our whatever we... And we had separate things, too. So, there's something in the stock. There was something in the beans and the rice.

Oh, there's so much wonderful Mexican food for so cheap in Southern California. And that's kind of my thing. And I find a lot of sit-down places I go to. A lot of it's bad. A lot of it's bad. And places where it's platters, they fill the plate with rice and beans. Some places, that's great. If they're really making their own rice and beans, like homemade, it can be wonderful.

But not everywhere. When we do Downtown Disney Ordeal Revisited, which is yet another one of our newest. Like an after show. Yeah. No, no, not an after show. When we do this whole thing again. Oh, like an after show yeah no no not an after show when we do this whole thing again oh like an after show six months later yeah but if the after show is the exact same topics and maybe more like there's more of the show oh so like a live action remake it's like a disney

live action remake and we'll add in uh just a couple extra characters and maybe one new song that was half written when we did the original kind of about hillary or something and it's kind of about yeah a topic uh something topical uh then the main thing all these movies uh all the villains are now like trump that's the only thing that's changed i'd like to say this this has never happened in the history of recording podcasts right we've been recording so long today uh my ears are ringing from wearing the headphones oh my god you're getting ear cancer not a crazy ring but like that like you know you fear that one like maybe even in a loud space too long i know that ring that's the ring of purgatory oh no jesus are you transitioning are you dying right now Oh I'm seeing like a Is that Joe Biden

Oh god Maybe I am Oh no No no Don't talk to him Alright yeah I don't want to Put his arm around you

He's clasping my Oh he's smelling my hair Oh no No no Come towards the fog Come towards the vape fog I'm back I'm back

Can we Well can we end this Aren't we there We could I think so Anything else about Tortilla Joes? I don't know. It made me sick.

And Mike's dying. And I know what Aaron's making me for dinner at home. And as soon as I leave, I get to have it. Oh. Is it reheated Tortilla Joes? Why, it's enchiladas. And I swear enchiladas with the green sauce are better than what we had at Tortilla Joes. I'll tell you that much. Enchilada Aaron is her nickname from now on. Enchiladas With the green sauce Are better than Better than what we added Through Dio Joe's Let's say that much

Enchilada Aaron Is her nickname Enchilada Aaron Man you gotta make those In bulk What do you guys Got rude We're feeding you now

I brought you iced tea Already You did bring me iced tea Thank you Jason makes all of his Friends his Surrogate family Because Why I Say it Say it Jason makes all of his friends his surrogate family. Because, why?

Say it, say it. I don't mean family. If this isn't heading towards the end of the episode, I don't know what is. I would like to say that we survived this level on stage but do we get anything? boys boys you give me strength you also give the level keeper strength who's my cousin he texted you

yes he or she texted me from their cricket wireless prepaid phone they said that they're doing well and that they want to add something to your inventory to help you along in your journey. Great. We're going to need it.

From Splitsville. It's a pitcher of sangria. Oh, wow. Oh, refreshing. Yes. That's great. There's an orange there and a strawberry. But while you drink it, or you can only drink it while you bowl a full game.

Oh, man. Wait, what? So it can only drink it while you bowl a full game. Oh, man. Wait, what? So it can only be used in tandem? Yes. Can we throw it at someone's head? Like, say, Robert Earl's head? I don't know. I shouldn't assume anyone's the boss.

Yeah. Okay. Well, I don't know. We'll figure out a way To make that work We'll have to MacGyver that Into something But there's potentially Useful items within that

Sure Like we could take An orange slice And make somebody Slip with it Yeah Break the pitcher Or

And when all's said and done If we just get rid of the sangria Keep the pitcher Future place for Jason's suckers to sit Oh my god Jason How many suckers

Could you store in that pitcher Oh gosh Probably a whole bag A whole dum-dum bag I like you jason's suckers to sit oh my god jason how many suckers could you store in that picture gosh probably a whole bag a whole dum-dum bag i like you when you're talking to wave a sucker around like like go jack like sloppy yeah like sloppy telly himself uh ohana means family baby ohana means family baby that was a little cleaner you're better at code deck tell your voiceover coach um okay so we we have some sangria now which we can take uh into uh tomorrow's sector uh level four dash two not sector so fuck this is what i when you've been recording all day okay so you survived pog has the ride the downtown disney ordeal level four stage one we

made it and if you want to survive more stuff keep following us on twitter instagram and facebook hashtag dddo hashtag save the level keeper hashtag sector keeper cricket wireless severance Hashtag Sector Keeper Cricket Wireless Severance. This has become an exit interview for me every episode. What's the children's song where it keeps growing every time? The song that doesn't end? Yeah, maybe. No, that doesn't grow. That stays the same. It gets longer, and then it's like, and that's the way it goes.

Well, the 12 Days of Christmas does that. Yeah, it's sort of like that. Yeah, yeah. Or it's like the Andy Kaufman sang a song about like, the cow goes moo and the pig goes on. Right. Anyway, to wrap it up, as you hopefully know by now, from coming from the underworld,

three bonus episodes every month at patreon.com slash podcast, The Ride. And next month, it'll be something different tomorrow a lot of fun in store different kind of beverages in store uh come back checking out this has been a forever dog production executive produced by mike carlson jason sheridan scott gardner brett boehm joe Cilio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts, please visit foreverdogpodcasts.com and subscribe to our shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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