Podcast: The Ride - Guardians of the Galaxy — Mission: Breakout! LIVE

Episode Date: March 25, 2022

It's the first P:TR live show in over two years! And we're talking about the punctuation heavy Guardians of the Galaxy — Mission: Breakout! Recorded live at Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles, 3/22 Disney's Fairy Tale Weddings episode up at The Second Gate: Patreon.com/PodcastTheRide Listen to Podcast: The Ride Ad-Free on Forever Dog Plus: http://foreverdogpodcasts.com/plus FOLLOW PODCAST: THE RIDE: https://twitter.com/PodcastTheRide https://www.instagram.com/podcasttheride BUY PODCAST: THE RIDE MERCH: https://www.teepublic.com/stores/podcast-the-ride PODCAST THE RIDE IS A FOREVER DOG PODCAST https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/podcasts/podcast-the-ride Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forever! Dog! Greetings! It is I, Joe Rohde. I'm sorry I couldn't be there in person. I'm in deepest Bora Bora, gathering artifacts for my

collection. As you know, I'm quite the collector. And soon, the Rohde collection will unveil its most prized acquisition. The Good Boys of the Galaxy.

You see, two and a half years ago, Mike, Scott, and Jason put on a little live show where they made fun of my precious ear thing. So in March of 2020, I locked them down in total isolation where they could never do a live show again. That's right, girl.

They can't make fun of you now. In a few minutes, you will be taken to encounter the good boys on the Dynasty Typewriter Gantry. But first, you'll see my private office, full of pieces from all around the galaxy. And soon, you'll be able to travel the galaxy on Richard Branson's Virgin Galactica. Virgin Galactica, Virgin Galactica. We've got a fun billionaire. You know, when Dickie Branson first called me, he's joking. They're never going to let you build that second island.

All right, hang on. Let's mute this guy. All right. No way. I like that guy better when his sound wasn't working. Yeah. Keep him muted, I say. What's going on, everybody?

It's us, Three Rockets. Yeah. what's going on everybody it's us, Three Rockets yeah it's so good to see you guys but under not so great of circumstances let me tell you what's happening that crazy Joe Rohde he has captured the good boys in the Dynasty Typewriter gantry lift.

We got to do something. We got to bust them out of there. Yeah, he could have at least sent them to Alani Resort. Somewhere nice that he has access to. The Alani prison. Yeah. But they're just up there rotten. They've been up there since March of 2020.

That's why they couldn't do a live show. It had nothing to do with the other thing. Yeah, don't think about the other thing. Don't give one thought to the other thing. Don't think about the other thing. I'm sure it won't get referenced tonight at all ever again.

Not on anybody's mind. But we gotta do something, right? What are we going to do? We got a plan. We're going to take the Dynasty Typewriter gantry lift up to the Dynasty Typewriter generator in this historic, beautiful building.

Yeah. Blow the generator, which will unleash all of the cages that they have in this old comedy theater and free the good boys. Yeah, that's right. That's right. Hopefully,

it won't free any other podcasters, too. Just those three guys we like. It'd get very confusing otherwise. More than three voices. Ben Shapiro ain't locked up in here, hopefully. We never know what monsters we could unleash. Oh, monsters after dark.

Ah. Scary. Okay. So that's the plan. That's what we're going to do. And let's go do the... Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

I forgot one thing. We better address the elephant in the room, the hitch in the plan. Yeah, that hitch, it's incredibly complicated. Let's pay attention to what we're going to say to you now. Take some notes, perhaps.

How do we put this? It involves certain appendages, certain parts of the body. It's embarrassing to talk about, really. Let's go back a little. Let's go back a little. Okay.

You guys know arms. Okay. The thing at the end of arms. Now, hold on. Hold on. I know it's a thing. It's shoulders. Nope.

Wrong way. Wrong way. That's up. You want to go down. You want to go down the arm. Not wrists. Not wrists. You want to go down. You want to go down the arm. Not wrists. Not wrists. Keep going.

Wrists are great. Our flexibility is fine. We love wrists, but we ain't talking about wrists. It's really what's attached to those wrists. Let's just, I guess, out with it. Here's the issue. Our hands don't scan.

Oh, wow. It's like you guys were ahead of us. You somehow knew the issue. But, well, here's really where it becomes a trivia challenge because do you know the second part? It involves you. Hint. Okay, let's see. Our hands don't scan. Yours do.

Yours do, yeah. Okay, great. They're way ahead of us on this. So smart. They're so smart. Should we say it one more time just to reiterate? I really want to make sure everybody's got it. Yeah, let's say it.

Let's make a meal out of it. Okay, let's all raise our voices and make sure we understand the situation. Okay, all together now. Our hands don't scan. You do.

Wow, wow. Give yourselves a round of applause. With your hands that scan, ours do not. I shouldn't keep reiterating. I think they get it. I think they understand.

So we can move on with the rest of the plan, and here's what it is. When we give you the signal, you are going to raise your hands, and that way you get the clearance, and the chaos can begin. Yeah. Yeah. The chaos of three men in their 30s calmly talking about a theme park attraction. Yeah. The chaos of three men in the 30s calmly talking about a theme park attraction.

Chaos. And you know, it's been a while. They might want to amend that. They're pretty firmly late 30s. We got older, folks. We all did. We all lived a lifetime in these last two years. Oh, there I am bringing up the thing again. Okay, let's cut that off and let's get on with the folks. We all did. Sorry. We all lived a lifetime in these last two years. Oh, there I am

bringing up the thing again. Okay, let's cut that off and let's get on with the show. We understand the plan, right? We all understand the plan. Yeah, we know. Then here we go.

Let's get this show on the road. Here we go. Okay. This is the, this is the part. This is where it all happens. We're going to plug in this Zoom recorder,

a podcaster's best friend. Now, just ignore the scotch tape on the back holding the battery compartment on. It's for professional fidelity. Don't worry about it. Okay, so when we plug this thing, when Rockets plug you in, Podcast to Write does its first live show

in over two years. Are you ready? I love it. Okay. Oh, yeah. It's the moment. Let's... Okay.

It's... All right, hold. I never get this. Hold on. Which way? There's the center page. Which way does that go? I know it's always the center.

Yeah, okay. You know what? This may be more of a one person thing. So why don't you take that? Let's see it in one sec. You know what? I say close enough. Okay, let's do this. Yeah.

All right, let's see those hands, people. You got clearance. It's Podcast the Right Line! Hi! Hello! Whoa! Hi! Hello! Oh, I still have a tail. I forgot about the tail. One tail. We're us. We've been trapped for years. And we're out! We're finally out! And you're out too! You're out in a real place!

Welcome to Podcast the Ride, a theme park about podcasts that's coming to you live from a room of 200 people who are not on Zoom. This is not on Zoom. I think you said a theme park about podcasts. Oh, geez, I'm just so excited. I'm getting mixed up.

We're rusty doing a live show, folks. So yeah, we're going to say things tonight that are going to be weird. Yes. Brain farts aplenty. Hopefully just brain farts. No real farts. No. We can promise.

We'll try to promise that. That's not our humor. It's a bit bawdy. It's a bit bawdy. That would be a bit body yeah well speaking of getting mixed up we forgot the part where we say our names my name is Scott Gairdner hi everybody and your names I'm Jason Sheridan, I'm Michael Carlson. Mike Carlson, whatever.

I say Mike on the show. Why did I say Michael? You're giving your official SAG registered name to the audience. Well, no, I didn't even do that. My SAG name is Michael R. Carlson. Yeah. Because there is already a Michael Carlson, or is there a Mike Carlson? I forget. I hate him.

Get out of the business. Boo. Boo. Leave room for our Michael Carlson. Just to take things down for a sec. This is incredible. I'm so happy you guys are here. We've waited so long to do this.

I thought so much through those. I probably like pathetically practiced to a wall like, hey, if I guess right, it's live. We're back for the first time in four months. And then it kept getting longer and longer and longer. But now we're here. We're doing it in a Dynasty typewriter, which we love. We're so happy.

Thank you. This feels great. Yeah, I'm glad people are still here. There's nothing you're like, two years is a long time. You're like, yeah, there's a new theme park podcast we like now. You know, that's possible.

There's a bunch of people that do a theme park podcast that's not just about Aerosmith. Like, they don't talk about it. You know what I like about this theme park podcast? No Aerosmith. Like they don't talk about it. You know what I like about this theme park podcast? No Aerosmith talk. I could see that being refreshing. It's possible.

Yes. I wouldn't hold it against you guys. A podcast about theme parks that talks about rides more often. Could have its appeal. Aren't there enough of those? He's right. Jason's right. Jason's right.

We're doing it perfectly. So, but thank you for coming. He's right. Jason's right. Jason's right. We're doing it perfectly. So, but thank you for coming. Oh my God. If we're getting cheap reactions from everybody, there's one thing that I've dreamed about in all of this time. I've really been waiting for this and I hope you guys can help me out with it.

Okay, here we go. If I need to make a telephone call... Please do! Okay! You asked for it! That's the new one! Asshole Mickey in the house! Asshole Mickey's here. I don't in the house asshole Mickey's here

I don't think I can do Mickey after rocket that's not a good voice cocktail no yeah that's too hard rocketified

can I say real quick as far as we're gonna get some cheap reactions yeah yes that's all it's gonna be as I was driving here and I didn't realize this

because obviously it wasn't on my radar maybe the last time I was driving through Echo Park there is a street called clifford drive like five minutes from here and i thought that was a good sign i thought that that was a sign the show was gonna go well yeah absolutely and i got out and i kissed the sign i got back in the car and i drove here we've never we haven't had the chance to... The Cliffords thing is new.

By round of applause... Somebody made a noise that they're sick. They got sick because of something. Which we can do first. Any reaction's a good reaction, right? By round of applause, do you like being called Cliffords? That's pretty good.

Yeah. I'm worried, though. Pretty good. By round of applause applause do you not like being called clifford's a substantial showing for the latter i think honestly i think there was there was less people but stronger claps that's my reading of it. They've been storing it up for a long time. Yeah, yeah. It's been a long time.

It feels really great. The last time that we were in front of an audience of any kind, it was a pop-up performance art show in an about-to-close electronics store in Anaheim that's right i got to be in a video for fries electronics for precisely two days before the show the store shut down forever that's probably the reason it got to happen in general was anyone here at that

also oh great oh thank you. Well, you got to see the like home theater screening room, which seemed like it was about to collapse on us when we were sitting in there. Yeah, the wrecking ball might have come through

right then and there. Yeah, knocking the asbestos right out of the walls. Just a bunch of dorks in there. Who cares? Yeah. But so that's the last time we were in front of you there is a

I'm so glad you guys are back there was one special guest at that occasion which was my son and oh geez you knew what you were doing. I wasn't sure.

At that point in time, he was negative six weeks old. And he was still in the womb. Now, so much time has passed, he is almost two years old. And my wonderful wife, Erin, and I just had the great occasion of taking him to Disneyland for the first time. We have a photo. Look at that!

Pretty cute, huh? Had to get some cheap applause for that. There he is, eyeing his next victim. Oh, pretty young, huh? Too late for you. Another one of your dad's, kinda. Your dad's making money off my back I hear

I hear all the little jokes they make And I'm keeping score There's a reason we vet Who comes to Galactic Star Closer Nonetheless comes to Galactic Starcloser! Nonetheless, yeah, wonderful moment, and you know, we did a lot of fun stuff with him

that day. One thing that we did not take him on, I can't imagine how this could have been possible, but he was not allowed on the ride that is the topic for tonight's episode, which if you hadn't guessed already, it is related to what

we started doing earlier tonight. But what if it wasn't? Hey, it's the teacups! Surprise! We did tie these things together. Tonight we are talking about Guardians of the Galaxy Mission Breakout. Yes.

I'm excited. You know, it was a big night, and I think we had to do a big one and a fun one. I've been thinking about, I've been a little self-conscious about so far in 2022, it's been a lot of weird, unpleasant

shit, right? Wait, that we've done or just in general? No, no. I mean, but you know, because it's been all these failed restaurateurs and Armageddon.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not so much talking about the possibility and Armageddon. Not so much talking about the possibility of Armageddon, but the ride. The ride itself. Armageddon is good. The movie's good. The ride is bad. Right. Jay Bigga, we've had to sit through. That's not the worst thing.

And ladies and gentlemen, joining us tonight. Joining us tonight to beat the shit out of us he hates being called a Clifford too no but this I think I'm so excited to do for a celebration which this is tonight, to do a ride that is a celebration,

that's a lot of fun, and that I think we're all extremely fond of. I think so. I think so. And with that, let's step two steps backwards into our chairs. Oh, wonderful. It's getting rough.

A podcaster's natural position. All the way back. Leaning back. Scratching. Really making a meal out of it. Yeah, so we're doing Guardians of the Galaxy mission breakout, which is different.

The last time we were at Dynasty, we did Superstar Limo, which is not as, I mean, popular for all of you, but not for like a normal person. And I mean that in the best way. But... This is one people go on.

A lot of people. People go on it. They get excited to go on it um yeah where to start uh uh well you know what's what's one thing maybe is i i do we're leading it by saying that we all like this attraction a lot the three of us but what is what are we yes i keep turning to the audience i guess

i'm curious excited to have one um i'm gonna turn this into a mori or something let's go to the audience. I guess I'm so excited to have one. I'm going to turn this into Maury or something. Let's go to the audience. What's the question? I guess like... Tower of Terror is a ride everyone loves,

but in hindsight now, I think let's get the same applause-o-meter that we did for the Clifford's question, and let's ask, are you happy now that this was same applause-o-meter that we did for the Clifford's question and let's ask do you are you happy now that this was changed to Guardians or are you still mad and you want our back so let's do the first question yeah are you happy they change this to Guardians of the Galaxy pretty good pretty sustained are Pretty good. Pretty sustained.

Okay, now, are you upset? This is the same thing, though. Less people, stronger claps. I know it. I can hear it. Those are sweaty claps. Yeah. That's like somebody's going to throw their shoulder out doing it, like trying to get the volume up.

You're stinging now. Hard claps for the abbreviated Tower of Terror. That's like somebody's gonna throw their shoulder out doing it like trying to get the volume up. You're stinging now. Hard claps for the abbreviated Tower of Terror. The abbreviated like quick fix for California Adventure. It's like the

Chili's to go of Tower of Terror. Yeah. Do we think there's anything about that Tower of Terror as opposed to the other ones? That it's not this new story like Japan had?

Yeah. It's not like markedly worse and boring like Paris? That's probably the same as what we had. I don't know what I'm saying. But was there anything like only that tower had it? No, right? Is there anything anyone could shout out? Is there something special about it?

Yeah. No. Yeah, no. The answer is no. You're answering for the mob justice. Yeah. It was nice to have the Tower of Terror here. I will say that.

I wasn't mad at it. I like the Tower of Terror a lot. Avoid some plane trips lot avoid some plane trips avoid some plane trips what was that? no Chris Pratt got him got him

that wasn't picked up you know he's gonna be in like a Tower of Terror movie in the next 10 years and they would have added him to it it was bound to happen there was

you know people were a little bit mad when this change out was announced. I think summer of 2016, the rumors started flying about this. And it seemed like a weird rumor. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I remember where I was. I'm not kidding. We were at Comic-Con, I believe, when the rumor popped up.

And then it was announced at Comic-Con, too, wasn't it? Yeah. I think so. It was all those people flooded out of the room, screaming and flailing. I mean, that's a pretty warm audience to announce it, I feel like. It was a... Jim Hill mentioned it a few weeks before i think it was announced um it was like a jim hill was like a trial balloon to see how people would react um and but yeah it was a crazy rumor it did it felt like it was not there's no way that's true

it seemed very odd and then when it was officially announced and then the turnaround time like it's announced in summer 2016 uh tower terror closes january 2017 guardians opens uh may 27th 2017 same day as pandora world of avatar on the other coast big weekend for roadie big weekend for joe roadie yeah yeah that, I mean, that's fast for any theme park company. That is lightning fast for Disney. Yeah, that's part of what seemed weird about it, I would think. Yeah, no, incredible. That was him. That was like

Phil Collins getting to be at both Live Aids. They're taking the Concord. My favorite semi-relevant reference of people. It's like that Foo Fighters Taking the Concord. My favorite semi-relevant reference. No people. It's like that Foo Fighters releasing the acoustic album and the electric album the same day.

You know? Everyone's thinking about it. Look, I'm in a good mood because we're in front of people and I'm happy to be back so I will throw this your way do you think that a reasonable analog is like Guardians of the Galaxy is like a perfect Green Day album as opposed to one that is slightly less than perfect the answer is yes the answer is it's perfect like American Idiot or Dookie or...

Honestly, I like Nimrod a lot. There might be a couple tracks you could cut, but honestly, why would you? I'm not in that good of a mood. Fair enough. I would love to see some Green Day on the ride, but... But... I would love to see some Green Day on the ride, but... But, yeah. When they go 90s, when it's the 90s refresh. Let me say something about when this announcement was made and people who were not terribly happy about it.

I wouldn't have known about this article except they flashed through it really quickly in the Imagineering story when they're explaining all this. There's an article in Slate, and the headline of the article is, Disneyland's Tower of Terror is closing. This is a national tragedy. And I got curious what the rest of it was.

An important context for the little bit I'm going to read is that this is from October 12, 2016. Just place yourself in what was happening then. I'm bringing up an even worse time. Chilled the room. So, okay.

I have clicked on what I think is an article about a ride closing and getting replaced by another ride. It'll probably be okay. And then it starts, this past Sunday as I watched one of our country's presidential nominees threaten to put his opponent in prison, I was reminded of my favorite quote by Friedrich Nietzsche.

Where are we? Look, I guess I can't blame this person. This is probably what any of us would have written about any topic. What do you think about gumballs? Well, I'm not American simulacrum. What do you think about hot dogs? Well, Baudrillard once said...

No, it's a crazy... And then further in, and yet shortly before, please, sweet, merciful Christ on a pony, someone who is not Donald Trump takes the oath of office this coming January of 2017. Oops. The California Tower of Terror will take its final drop.

So, neither issue worked out the way this slate person wanted it to go. On the brighter side, both Avatar and Guardians of the Galaxy feature

Zoe Saldana. So there's that. Yeah. That's a little brighter, huh? Right? She's kind of the connection between the movie

and I think soon they could introduce the Seed Bearer's big seed into both of these attractions. The Seed Bearer, one of the hypothetical titles of I think it's the third Avatar.

The Way of Water is second, okay? So you put the Seed Bearer in the queue for Guardians and then you put the big seed, no, you put the seed bearer in the queue for guardians and then you you put the big seed no you put the big seed wait wait wait and then hold on hold on meet and greets at panthura hold on hold on yeah sorry i'm just blue skying i just got a little caught up in it i'm just saying i'm just interested do you think there's a very large seed in that movie okay i think because I think

if it's called the seed bearer, it's one of two things. There's either one real big seed or there's a person with a lot of little seeds. And I think they're just going to cheap out. I think it's going to be too cheap

to just do a lot of little seeds in the Guardians. The seed bearer would seem to indicate there's one entity that is the bearer. So this entity would have to be very large to carry a large seed. Yeah, he's an avatar.

Or whatever they're called. Okay, wait. I don't want to get this completely off the rails here. But when you say large seed, do you mean like a foot? Because that's a large seed. Yeah, I think like a big thing. Or it could be even bigger. I mean, not to jump too far ahead,

like the Adam Warlock cocoon that's in the Guardian's queue. They could just swap out the sign. But even like... Big seed. The seed bearer's big seed. But a seed is normally this big. So even a five-inch seed is a big seed. But a seed is normally this big. So even a five inch seed is a big seed. Well, but it's not.

But on the world of Pandora, in the Hallelujah Mountains, that's not going to grow much. A little seed's not going to grow much. Not going to grow much? I think a five inch seed would grow a substantial. No, I think it would grow. Yeah. No, it'll grow something. But you want...

I mean, if it's big trees with those big mountains... What do you think the seed looked like when there were, like, forests up in Northern California? They were little. At some point. That's my point. Maybe. I don't...

I'm surprised that I'm leaning Jason's way, and I'll scoot this way to prove that I... But I think, okay, yeah, you're right. The Northern California trees are big but that big tree in Avatar, that's one of the hugest trees I've ever seen. The one that burns down and they need a new one of those. They can't

like wait around for a little seed to grow. They gotta start big to get big. Oh, so you think, okay, again, not to get off the rails here, but you think when the seed is bigger the actual thing it's growing starts bigger. I think only in this universe, in the imagination of James Cameron, the answer is yes. So it's almost like if it's a big seed, you put it in the ground,

and something grows that's like pony size within like a week. That's just a root. So in the grand scheme of the tree. That's just a little root. Well, I guess we'll have to wait 11 years to find out. Guardians. Guardians of the Galaxy. What's the...

Where this began. Okay, the movie... I like these movies. I think, yeah, I think that's right. I think the box office reflects that. I think a lot of people like these movies, Michael. They're fun movies. I mean, look, it's not Citizen Kane. Do you typically judge things on that scale?

I'm a film aficionado who only compares things to Citizen Kane. So when you're watching one of your favorite films, such as the Paul Lynde Halloween special. That's true. Is this a Citizen Kane? Will they make a ride based on the Paul and Halloween special so so I was like reasonably hat like I definitely was like when I heard that I was like this seems it seems like a bad idea I did think that even though I was like oh the movies are a fun little fun little Yeah. If we unpack that, yeah, why did we think, I guess maybe the rush job nature of it, and

maybe it seemed a little gross, like let's just jam a currently popular thing in as fast as possible. That could have mixed results. And it did seem like, I guess I was thinking Tower of Terror seemed untouchable. I think that's like, as much as we like to make fun of like when people pick it when a ride is going away, there are still a bunch of things that like, I go, well, I never, and I get very upset. Like that Polynesian weird hotel thing, like the expansion. I was like, I am so, like, I'm embarrassed that I'm like so upset about this.

But it definitely felt, yeah, like when they announced the change, I was like, well, I'm embarrassed that I'm, like, so upset about this. But it definitely felt, yeah, like, when they announced the change, I was like, well, that's not gonna, how would that work? Show me how that would work. And at that time, in 2016, 17, you're like, this is the angriest an announcement from the Disney company

will ever make me. Nothing could be worse. Actually, to tie things together, I think that the reason that this happened is it is, it's 2016 or so, and Disney's owned Marvel for like five years, and

they're looking around and saying, we've not done anything big and permanent with Marvel. Why are we we not and I think the person leading this charge was the then chairman of perks and resorts whose name is Bob Chapin I thought everybody could use that one's coming sure yeah feels pretty good. Yeah, you heard us. Was this his last win?

Because it's just been L after L since then. It's a stunning record at this point. It's really, yeah. Of like basic corporate confidence, or competence, I should say. Yeah, so he was there. He was there at the... Yeah, so I think he was feeling it. This gets presented to Joe Rohde,

who is refreshingly not towing the party line. I feel like in every interview that I found Joe Rohde doing about this attraction, that he admits that his initial thought was, that sounds stupid. So if your first reaction was that, Mike, and that was the reaction of the person who made the thing. Right, so Joe and I, same page. As far as our feelings, yeah.

That's why we wandered into his collection to try to connect on this point. Right, yeah. And we were stuck for two years. So anyway, he fights through that. That's what he said. That's impossible. That's a dumb idea.

But then you have to work your way through that. I don't think they knew it was Guardians of the Galaxy initially. Apparently they considered something with Spider-Man. They considered something with Doctor Strange. I don't know what those could have been. But Guardians of the Galaxy was extremely popular at that moment. And then the second one on the way, they're filming it as they're having this idea,

which means everybody's in one place and they can actually film stuff with the cast, which they did. All our favorites are back. Most of the audience's favorites are back. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's interesting to think, like, because Spider-Man makes some sense, I feel like.

You know, you're going up and down Maybe it's a skyscraper of some kind Doctor Strange, his Sanctum Sanctorum Is a very famous building that we all know and love It's a creepy building full of, you know, portals And, I don't know, other dimensional beings I'm sitting here thinking Do we talk about the Sanctum Sanctorum on the show a lot,

or do Mike and I just talk about Sanctum Sanctorum a lot in our personal life to each other? How many people, should we ask the audience again? Yeah. Does anybody remember us saying the word Sanctum Sanctorum? Yeah. Not enough, apparently. Not enough.

So we're going to up that. Don't worry. It's going to be on every other episode now uh uh so yeah that makes sense that you would have like a weird elevator journey with dr strange i don't know i don't know that there's an elevator famous elevator i don't know if stanley and steve dicko had a famous elevator but you could have retconned that in i think um but it does make sense it all makes sense it like make it for something that's like a uh uh just a retool of an old ride like it does make a lot of it's really smartly done yeah he really did it yeah joe joe uh he did you're right that there is a there's like an odd and maybe some of what he bumped on, is that it is an elevator, ultimately

that is your vehicle. And it was an elevator that was meant to be an elevator in this hotel. But now almost anything else you do with it, probably it needs to not be an elevator. And now we're in the world of science fiction and comic books and fantasy

so we can turn this into anything that we can dream up. And where we land is gantry lift. Yeah. We are in a gantry lift. Has anyone heard this phrase before in your life? Well, Jason mentions this on the

show that his dad dunked on him when he brought it up. Yeah, I got my ass roasted by my dad who grew up during the space age and he's my dad, who grew up during the space age. And he's like, anyone who grew up watching multiple rocket launches, all they did was talk about the astronauts are boarding the gantry lift, like again and again. So yeah, the boomers did something right.

Gantry lifts. Congrats, Ken. Gantry lifts. Congrats, Ken. Gantry lift. I mean, it is good. Like, you have to give it up for this ride because there's so many different things that, like, just are burrowed now in our brains in the same way that any, like, ride

that's been there for 50 years. Like, gantry lift is a phrase I'll never forget. I'll be in a retirement home, and I'll be like, gantry lift. Gantry lift. I'll be like, gantry lift. Gantry lift. I'll be like, oh, Mr. Carlson's talking about a gantry lift again. Sanctum Centauri.

Nimrod. Perfect track listing. Green Day. Mighty Akron. Something only I said. I did that. I said. You did that.

If Mighty Akron has a phrase in one of the Avatar movies, it's because of me. It's true. They don't say it in the movie. It's me.

That Mighty Akron is choking on that giant seed if that happens in the movie i'm gonna be like both thrilled and upset at the same time entitled to royalties yes yeah um so we we got a gantry lift uh what else in terms of like thinking out this thing well another step of it i think with roadie is like when it's a hotel what else do you turn this thing into then he takes a walk he looks at and he thinks well as long as you take the signage off there's not a lot here

that necessarily says hotel which is kind of fourth dimensional on his part because i see hotel i don't think anybody could have imagined what it would become. What it is, which is the collector's fortress, is not like an immediate... It is weird and crazy. I remember you saying that pre-podcast. We weren't doing it. We were just doing it to ourselves. And you were...

Yeah. To our significant others. Talking to yourself. But I remember you being, Mikey, being an early adopter of like, as soon as that art was out, I think you're like, this thing's weird.

And maybe weird is good. Yes. I felt like a Jack Kirby or Steve Ditko or some like old, bizarre, like monstrosity. Like colors don't really match. It ended up looking a little different, I feel like, than the concept art, but it definitely was

right up my alley as far as being a bizarre base. As a child, I was obsessed with the base of a villain or the heroes. I've said this before. I was obsessed where people slept. I loved knowing where the Ghostb Like, I loved knowing

where the Ghostbusters, where their beds were. And as a kid, I... You know what I'm talking about. You were really hoping to see the collector's, like, cot

behind the desk at the office. I would... Yeah, do you think he sleeps in a cot? Like, when he shows that he wants to work long hours

like on the Theranos show where it's like here's my sleeping bag I'm a total psycho I sleep in the office sometimes yeah I would look I would like to see

his sleeping bag I would like to see his cot I would like to see all that stuff so when I saw it it felt like a crazy weird comic book thing,

which is like now with Avengers Campus is like such a – and I will say this. I don't know if we talk about it a lot. I think we've come around a little even more to Avengers Campus lately in general. But I will say the thing that's like a nonsense thing, a comic book thing is still the Guardians Tower. It still looks like a crazy thing that I would scribble on a notebook when I was in third grade, which I think is good. And it's been annexed.

It's now an Avengers Campus. Yes, it is technically an Avengers Campus, and they added the blue goo, which I don't know. Am I getting my head on myself by talking about the blue goo already? You're going to talk about the blue goo whenever your heart desires. Which is the Kirby Crackle. Yeah, it's supposed to goo whenever your heart desires. Which is the Kirby Crackle. Yeah, it's supposed to be like energy. I hear applause for the Kirby Crackle. Kirby Crackle.

We love to see it. Which is like how Jack Kirby would draw energy or whatever. It definitely looks more like goo. It looks a lot like goo. I like it. So yeah, because the initial story of the ride was that, I guess there was a Tower of Terror was there, and then all of a sudden the Guardians Tower thing just, like, planted.

It appeared. Yes. It appeared. Yeah, this is what Joe Rohde said. This is a story just like, you know, one day a big lock with the Avengers logo showed up. Wait, remember the big lock? We should do an episode on the big lock.

Wait, when you say lock, do you mean the like thing in the ground? The big latch like thing in the ground that they put. That was more like a manhole cover or something.

Yeah, I don't know. Not really a lock. Well, look, this is an hour. We're going to have to figure out what to call it and that's a second gate and that's how the magic gets made. Yeah.

Got one. Plucked it. A seed. Perfect. No, you're right. In the story of the ride it is that like this just appeared one day yeah so i guess the campus was there and then the collector's building just appeared out of nowhere as if it was transported there and that's as far as we know that's all we know okay yes which is pretty I guess, and that leaves us a lot to figure out. Yes. So this

ride is based around, the collector is the character Tantalier Tavon. Tantalier Tavon. Not Tantalier. No, not Tantalier. I like Chanticleer. Chanticleer? No. I like Tantalier.

Tantalier's a little more coy. I'm Tantalier Tavon. You should consider putting extra T in there. No, I'll just leave it to you to say. I'll just say Tavon from this point. Sure. But he's from Guardians of the Movie, but it's not a big part.

So it's a little weird that there's but it's not a big part. So it's a little weird that there's a whole ride with a lot of him. Benicio Del Toro being the actor who plays him. Yes, it is. He has like one scene in the first Guardians. Does he have a scene in the second one? He's in Infinity War as well. But again, another one scene.

Yeah. And they took him and then they made... This is like the most benicio content that exists is in the theme park ride it's like he does he he has like one no you know excuse me he has a post-credit scene in a different marvel movie as well and i can't remember what it was thor i a lot of thor the Dark World fans out here. Often considered the worst Marvel movie. All of the Thor the Dark World fans are here. I like the end of Thor. I think the last 30 minutes of Thor the Dark World are good. I think those are good minutes.

That's how we're wrapping up the show. We're just going to play those. Just going to show the, yeah. So, yeah. So he's, what was that what a cartoon which I have not seen well people upset am I not a big enough nerd for you I got other thing I have first of, I have to get to Yellowstone. I'm going to get to it. He's saying, yes. I'm going to watch Yellowstone. Finally, more pressure on you.

Yellowstone before what if. So in the same way that like Hondo and Naka, it's like the, I like, it's a kind of a Disney tradition. I feel like to take a character that's not the main character and make it. Flesh it out a little. Yeah, make that the kind of focal point of the ride, or of the pre-show, I should say.

Maybe as close as we're getting in a way, because we don't get a lot of original IP. The most original you can get is somebody we haven't really met for a little. He's kind of a background guy. Exactly. Take what we can get. Benicio's great. Obviously, he's a very interesting actor.

And I get... People thought I meant that sincerely. If we're talking Benicio, should we pull up a clip here? Yes. This odd... I don't know if people here saw

the opening ceremony of this attraction. That was a weird hush. I don't know what that means. It is a fun opening ceremony. I'll say that. Because they have some executives giving very dry, we're so excited for this new innovation.

And then they've got some cele you know, celebs there. And they do like. Michael Rooker. Rooker's there. You know. Yondu. Yondu. That's right.

It's his character. Also. A lot of applause for Yondu. Yeah, I like Yondu. He's got the arrow. He shoots an arrow. I have no idea what he is. He's blue.

I'm experiencing him by applause. You are more of like a Rooker and Mallrats guy. Yeah, remember he eats the thing with the poop on his hands? With the pretzel. Chocolate covered pretzel. Why watch other movies where you can just watch

the View Askew universe over and over and over again? Exactly. This video, this opening ceremony, wait, were you saying something else about your video? Oh, no, no. I was just setting up the clip. Like, this is kind of the end of the opening ceremony

and we get a little surprise. Well, it's a bunch of celebrities are introduced as themselves. They come out and do nothing, and then they smile, and then there's a big sudden interruption. By the way, original character, I think, Afida, might be saying it wrong, who knows,

but I think it's the pink girl who holds her hands, which I think is original to this attraction. Yeah, she's in the movie. No, all right, all right the movie. I read that somewhere. So the site was wrong. Not me. Right? That's how it works. Say the site.

What is it? Magicmouse.com? Bumpercar boys rumors and news. Boo. Let me astray again Sons of bitches We'll get him son Alright here we go Opening ceremony

Oh my He's here Everyone prepare yourselves Terrence It is time to introduce James kind of saying hello to someone during this. ...to come to your planet and humbly grace you with his grace.

He's like, doesn't seem too worried. ...to you. Shapex having a giggle. Shadowy figure approaching. Who is it? Oh my gosh. Can't see, too much mist. Benicio!

Benicio! You're Benicio Del Toro Ah, hello You can't be here The collector would not be pleased A Terran cannot stand in his place Oh, I don't think you'll mind I'm here to the opening of the Tyvon

collection Ladies and gentlemen of Terra the Tyvon collection is officially open Ladies and gentlemen of Terra, the Tyrone Collection is officially open. How about that? I like that. That's fireworks and stuff.

Great. Beautiful. Those are maybe, those are like the two most mismatched actors I've ever seen. Giant theme park energy, whatever shall we do?

I don't know. He does seem amused to be there. He also, if I can remind everyone at the time, Benicio Del Toro was the spokesman for Heineken, and it seems like he just came from the wrap party. I like to think he had

like three Carthay Manhattans and then came over there. He knew what he was doing he would have. Yeah. So that's great and that the opening of the attraction kind of marks the immediate turn where everybody's upset and there's change. And the opening of the attraction kind of marks the immediate turn

where everybody's upset and there's change.org petitions and stuff. Again, it's 2016. People have anger-free time on their hands. They don't know how busy they're going to be with petitions soon enough. But pretty quickly upon the opening

of the situation, it turns so fast. As soon as anybody goes on it, this is great and really fun and inventive and well done. Can I ask the audience, was anyone there on opening day? Oh, wow.

That got no response. Okay. I will tell you who was at opening day. Mike and I. We were there and I believe correct me if I'm wrong

we waited We waited like four and a half hours. Were we there opening day? I swore it was opening day. Maybe it was a day later. I thought it was opening day because we waited

four and a half hours. It might have been opening day but we definitely waited four and a half hours. It might have been opening day, but we definitely waited four and a half hours with a bunch of like... We were backstage. We were in weird places. We were waiting in weird places. That's how big the line was. And then we shared a Hulk donut. Yes, filled with apple pie filling, the Hulk's favorite it's those little details in the parks

you know those little Marvel detail true believers I want to tell you something about the Hulk. He loves apple pie filling. Excelsior. We remember the Stan soapbox where he said it. We had something else, too. Didn't we split something else?

I think you got something at Schmoozy's and then went this is disgusting and I finished it. Yeah. A perfect pair. What'd you do without each other? Jason, as I've said many times, he's eating soup after me. Well, not in the last two and a half years.

I mean, not. It was at Disneyland. And it was actually a bit... Disneyland soup? No, no, it was a bisque. It was the bisque at the... Oh, fancy. I'd like to think that was all sarcastic.

I don't think it was. I was being made fun of. I'd be impressed. I was being made fun of by the audience. Well, so, well, the four and a half hours gave you plenty of time to admire well first some random dumpsters and uh yeah delivery roads but once you got into the building itself the collector's fortress itself uh many treasures yeah yeah the queue itself is great the loop is like got a lot of weird like pitch down noises and it's like uh the collector is not just a collector of things he's a collector

of sounds yeah he loves sounds uh uh there and foliage too there's a lot of uh plants in the line and i read something that the imagineers called it the gardens of the galaxy. And I think that's real cute. It is. It is cute. You get this video where you meet the collector

and he kind of gives you the gist of things and you see the guardians trapped in their cages. A lot is explained to you there. A big info dump video, but a fun info dump video. Yeah. And they're in no mere cages.

They are in cages that are perfectly in the center of a big hollow building. It's attached to a lot of power. He's a collector of power, too. Yes. Of sound and power and spikes and big spiky gears which are way below great guardians so they if you think them just stepping out of the cage will be enough think again yes it's it's full like with all this look i have not seen this new batman okay

but guardians don't first yellowstone first what if then the patents in batman uh um but it's full of nonsense the guardians of the galaxy is full of nonsense this is what i love as a kid the crazy contraptions that could never be built it's not like grounding like the collector like you go and see him buy the cages from like uh home depot which is how you would do it in like the batman the newer batmans where it's like so grounded in reality is like you see him construct the cages and the cages have to be a certain height and his base you have to watch him like sign the rental agreement for it it's like grounded in reality we need to see how this happened.

We don't need to see the cages being constructed in his tower. I figured out your clue, Riddler. I listened to your podcast. Does the Riddler have a podcast in the new movie? No. Kind of.

Kind of. Kind of. I feel like I have heard that and then I was worried I made it up. He has a Twitch channel. Okay, so he's hitting all the social media. Got it, got it. Okay.

So this will age as well as the maze of flip phone feeds in Dark Knight. Yeah. So many flip phones. It's going to triangulate 400 flip phones. We have to tap into the signal of all the flip phones. We have to flip them open and then track them. Verbatim dialogue

from The Dark Knight. Let me see. Sorry. Let me see your Motorola Razr so I can reverse engineer your Motorola Razr. I probably will like this, Batman.

I'm just saying, it's all full of nonsense that I, as a kid, I liked. Like, why I liked all this stuff is, like, crazy bases and stupid stuff that is impossible to build. Well, speaking of, like, crazy little kid stuff in this, very quickly in this video, you get the Stan Lee cameo. Yes.

Who has just one line. There's, like, a bunch of items are trapped and he is the first thing that lets you know that living beings are trapped in this facility as well and he says hey do you guys validate and it's like as silly cornball as anything

Stan Lee does and now listen I'm no Marvel person I've proven that time and time again but I love these. I love the Stan Lee cameos. Really? I bet.

I do, especially in this, because it just reminded me how much I like that, like, at least there is, there'll be one part of any of these things that feels like a 70s variety special. That's true. That, like, or, you know, when we had, I think we're losing,

I think we've lost this now a little bit because certain Marvel things are, to me... Be careful. Endless death slogs that are very boring and confusing. I don't know what anything is. Sir. Now, hold on. That endless death slog is going to pay off in the fifth Spider-Man.

Okay. Problem is you aren't watching enough endless death slogs. It's planning stuff. It's like when Arrested Velming would do like a call forwards. Yeah. Yeah. But if there was, you know, some of these that have been kind of a trudge recently, if there was just that one little thing puncturing, like a guy who is as good at acting

as Ralph Nader hosting SNL in his 70s. Doesn't know where to look. He's done so many of them, and still it's just as bad. I really like that. He was in his 90s. This is one of the last appearances, I'd have to think.

It could be one of the or it could be like the 10th to last. I to have to think um it could be one of them or it could be like the tenth to last i'm trying to think he was in uh was he in one of the infinity wars he's in both of them okay what's the second one he's uh in the 70s he drives by and he says he's in the car and that's the last one right yeah perfect well a perfect way to go out is in that is the end of the first whatever fate or color me impressed sir thank you for your help um yeah it's it's yeah it's he's i'm trying to think about my feelings about stan he uh what i think i liked about marvel and i love dc what i liked about marvel was like his weird like his weird nonsense like his

jokey tone that they kept literally in the movies with him like he was literally in there where it was often times not completely like deathly serious like DC not that there's obviously like 60s Batman's nonsense nonsensical but in a good way

maybe he did one what if he did he pre-filmed a post-credits for the last Marvel movie. Whenever that is. Several centuries from now. When did the scientists say? How long do they say we have? 50 years

or something? Or is that just 50 years until it's like we have to stay inside again? I'm sorry. Hopefully by then you'll be watching yellow stone right i hope i hope let's talk about some of the stuff yeah that you see because so much like uh yeah the stuff in the fortress is extremely cool and great for theme park nerds because there's so many fun Easter egg-y

things. We have pictures of a couple of them. Feel free to call it anything. First, because there's Marvel stuff too. The big one, I think, is the big one in the universe is Cosmo. I want to see that robot dog almost as good as the ride itself

as this robot dog that's in one of the things you feel bad because he's like caught in a cage but he's very cute I think we can all agree that Cosmo is cute very cute

the other animatronics the is it Vilus the little guys that kind of like look around that they added

at some point those are cute yeah like the technology where like I think it can see your eyes like it knows like if you're

like motion tracking yeah which obviously is some sort of crazy war technology but being used for cute aliens yeah

but those are great you've got a Nova Corps outfit I believe believe, in the corner. I mentioned the big Adam Warlock egg, which really gives me a lot of joy as a comic book fan, because when I was a kid, Warlock comics and a lot of the Infinity War stuff was quarter bin fodder. It may as well have been garbage, or you're buying it to line your bird's birdcage and now it is

the biggest thing in the world. Yeah. Did you read were you a big Adam Warlock fan? That's not a character that's not appeared yet.

I believe in the next one is appearing. I think so. Yeah. They're setting it up. Yes. I'm hearing yes. But did you like

did you were you imagining like living inside his egg? I really couldn't make heads nor tails of it and it all looked very like stuffy and old-fashioned compared to Jim Lee and Mark Silvestri and stuff drawing giant guys with big pouches

and giant guns and sexy ladies. This is where I crack a beer. Yeah. Proceed, gentlemen. Watch what? There's little runs on the podcast. It happened earlier when they were talking about Green Day albums where we just retreat into our mind palaces.

And we're just, you know. What do you think I'm doing? Yeah. Jason, who's the sassiest of the ladies on the X-Men? The sassiest? You just said a sassy lady. Well, I said sexy ladies. Oh, you said sexy ladies but oh you said sexy well yeah jason this is podcast the ride body body you know it's a cabaret it's an alt comedy theater you got

to be a little blue um this is a burlesque show i don don't know. Look at these lights. Who knows what was here a hundred years ago? Now let's wave those pasties around on our bare chest. Well, wait a minute. Wait, hold on. Let me cut you off right there. Who's the sexiest of the X-Women? Well, we don't have enough time. We don't have enough time.

Scott just revealed that he liked Gadget from Inspector Gadget or Inspector Gadget from the Rescue Rangers. Yeah, why not? You have the other one. I like Inspector Gadget too. Yeah. I mean, look,

imagine the possibilities. The possibilities are endless. So many tools and toys. That's like your Darling Nikki situation. My what? Your darling Nikki situation. Prince's darling Nikki,

a song about, a bawdy song by an artist named Prince who had devices. She had a lot of devices. I don't want to. Michael, the short answer

to your question in terms of sassiness would be the Southern Belle Rogue. Am I right, people? It's the first time Rogue's gotten a Pop-It Dynasty typewriter, I think. Let's talk about the

theme park stuff that you see. The characters, our loved ones who they've trapped. Yes. And who we get to sort of see again. So, yeah. I mean, the big one, our old friend, Figment.

Figment. Through very foggy glass. The foggiest glass. And we asked Tony Baxter, Figment's daddy, we asked him... That was on his W2 for a long time. We asked him when we interviewed him a few years ago,

we said, what do you feel about that? And he said, I like it, but I wish you could see him. Yeah. Oh. Yeah. Does he ever put his hands against the glass like a prison visit? Or like the end of Armageddon?

Yeah, he brings... against the glass like a prison visit. Or like the end of Armageddon. Don't wanna miss a thing. So yeah, it would be nice if they could get that glass a little cleaner. Unless it's the new figment, in which case, stay there and rock. Who else? Oh yeah, the original

Yeti. Pretty good. That new Yeti. Pretty good. That new Yeti is awesome, I will say, though. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. All right. So he can stay there. That's fine.

I think maybe everybody's well-placed. This octopus from Country Bears. Dolores. Dolores the octopus from the Country Bear Vacation. Two different worlds. Oh, yeah. That's fun. So I've said this before on the show.

It is interesting to me that, and now it is canon, that the collector, Tanaleer Tavan, is a big Disney Parks fan. He loves Disney Parks. I assume he has Park Stars, the vinyl toys that I do. And he's probably got a collection that rivals Richard Craft's. Yeah. He will have his own collection. Well, now he does.

Craft's sold a bunch of that stuff. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, now he's number one. Right,s. Yeah. He will have his own. Well, now he does. Crafts sold a bunch of that stuff. Yeah, that's true. Now he's number one. Right, right. But it does keep going and going, and those are the ones that you know about and that have been published and put in lists of Easter eggs,

but there's one, you really got to have an eagle eye to see some of the other ones that you might not know about. So other deep Disney lore that is deep in the collector's fortress. If you look close, really near the Yeti, you can see the never-installed Hillary robot.

They were almost done, just had one hand to go. Pretty sure about it. Yeah. These are kind of, you can see these kind of all over the place in the queue. There's a bunch of crates of unsold Lassiter wine. Terribly wanted today. There's even stuff on the desk, on the collector's desk. Like, for instance, you can actually see the shredded plans for the Avengers e-ticket.

Yeah. Don't need that anymore. And elsewhere, if you look close, this is kind of a recent addition. They actually kept the secret memo for billionaires only where Robert Iger got the early tip that COVID was coming. Here Mr. Iger quit

now from the secret billionaires society. Nice letterhead. It lets you know what it is. And a lot of this is more recent stuff, but they nod to the past too because we love the classic stuff and that's why they kept Walt's strike settling gun.

Break the glass. it's happening again So keep an eye out for those The next time you go Look close You know, you get through all of this stuff and you get closer and closer to the office. And this is where I should reiterate that until recently, this ride has scared the hell out of me.

I was not doing it for a long time. And finally, with some courage and alcohol as well, I began doing it alcohol is a coping mechanism that's a good thing right yeah yeah yeah healthy but I should

say I still this is like as far as I go in terms of thrills and I'm still really unnerved throughout that like that like engine room I'm so edgy during. You guys have been with me in that. Aaron, my wife, has a bunch of times. I'm different.

I'm a little cagey. Don't talk to me. Let me process this. And then I hear the ding, and I'm not excited about the ding. I'm going to do it. I will do it. And I'll be happy that I have done it. But as of right now, I don't feel great. But'm going to do it. I will do it. And I'll be happy that I have done it.

But as of right now, I don't feel great. But it hasn't gotten easier. A little bit easier because I do know that it's fun. I have now, I've started to accept

that it is really fun. And in a way, maybe more fun. Splash Mountain, which I overcame with the help of Figment's daddy himself, coming back here. That's still, I think the Ernest special still looms too large.

The special where Ernest was, if Ernest was scared on the Guardians ride, I don't know if I'd ever get over it. Yeah. I'm not fighting that. Well, I've said this before. I went on it, I guess a couple years ago with my friend, and we went on it five times in a row. And I think that if there's a way to get

over it, that's the way maybe you should do it. Although I guess with the new lightning lane stuff, it's impossible. Because we were doing fast pass whatever the hell it used to be called. And it was like grabbing it in line. Oh my God. Do you remember those days?

It's hard to so long ago. This is your glory days. You can just check. I'm going soon with a person from out of town and I am lost. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to do it.

It's so confusing what to do and what to buy and what to go. I used to be Batman and now I'm not Batman. You're just some idiot watching the Riddler's Twitch stream. You're a lurker.

Yeah. Thanks for the bits. I mean, have we missed anything pre-Ride? I mean, I think we sort of covered the... I don't know if you know this, but this whole thing where the hands don't scan yeah uh which which we like do his hands not scan because he because he's a raccoon and they only that is why as opposed to that they like put him on a list like if your credit card bounced well I yeah I thought it thought it was that the guests had been bioscan, like put in the system. Like when you

go to an art museum, they give you that little metal thing you clip on your shirt. I wouldn't know anything about art museums. Sorry. My pinkies were up for that one. Someone's wearing a blazer on stage.

I am. But with a Popeye and a vintage, yeah, I haggled down on Depop for this Islands of Adventure Popeye shirt. Jason and I wearing our favorite IPs. Ninja Turtles,

Popeye. I kind of empty them in a Hawaiian shirt. My IP is Mike Love. Universally beloved. Yeah, yeah. The best. Mike Love. Yeah.

So, well, let's... Oh, the rocket animatronic. Oh, yeah. It's great. The greatest. Yeah, isn't that something? It's really good. Undeniable.

He hits his little head on the pipe. He hits his little head. You see he hits his little head you see his little tail move around and uh if he's not working for some reason there's a little video i don't mind i mean the video's okay you know they got a plan the video's okay but it's so disappointing when the video plays yeah because like you want to see him fall because he falls out of a vent he doesn't really but they make it look like that and he like he's well it's possible they dropped the robot out of a man why are you ruining this i'm sorry i didn't know if you knew that these parts have illusions uh his little his little paws maybe that's why his hands don't

scan because they're really more like paws they are paws um they they little paws grabs the walkman on the way out too, setting up the start of the ride. It's so good. It's maybe as good as the ride itself, that pre-show. I would just go to see that and him grab the thing and... Excuse me, coming through, trying to get out. Pardon.

I saw the Walkman grab and I'm out of here. I saw the Walkman grab. That's enough for me. There's different, because there's two rooms. There's two loading rooms or two pre-show rooms. There's different stuff in each room as well. There's different artifacts. And Colson's gun is in one of the rooms.

Agent Colson, Clark Gregg, married to what? Jennifer? Thank you. Jennifer Gregg. Thank you. Married. Clark Gregg's character has a big gun in the Avengers. married to what Jennifer Gray I was going to say Jennifer Beals Jennifer Gray thank you married Clark Gregg's character

has a big gun in the Avengers and the big gun Scott is in one of the rooms and I get excited when I get the big gun room there's also

like stationary with a little memo on it from XSTech the fake company from Alien Encounter. Yes, very good. Again, he's a big parks collector. He loves Alien Encounter.

We should fast forward. Also, the painting of Goldblum and Benicio is really good. I don't think I know about that. What? It's outside when you walk by it. It's in between. Jason, can you bring that up on the phone? In between.

In between the... Bring that up on your phone. Okay. You have to have seen this. No, I have not. What? Well, man... It's the Grandmaster from Thor Ragnarok.

I was mentally skipping this cue. No, no. And then there's all these helmets, these very Kirby-style helmet stuff or face, whatever you call it. Celestials. Celestials. Thank No, no. And then there's all these helmets, these very Kirby style like helmet stuff or face, whatever you call it. Celestials. Celestials. Thank you, Jason. And I love Why is Jason pulling it up and not you? Because I have control

of this iPad and it's very delicate. Folks, the whole show could fall apart if I go surf the web. All right. These fine people came out. They don't want to see a professional show. They came out to see a guy hold his phone up to another guy and the other guy to go, oh.

I was at least talking. They're on the edge of their seats. Thanks for your tickets. But I love being in the room i am very at this point i've seen the show so many times uh that i really try to get out of the way of people because it's a very tight squeeze and i feel that oftentimes like if i'm not paying attention i am blocking a child and i try my best to get in the back but also that strategically is you people know that's you got to get out first so you get on the back, but also that strategically is, you people know, you got to get out first

so you get on the ride quicker. Yeah. See, you still, because those are the things you can teach your friend who's like, that haunted mansion dash. Like, no, no, no,

don't enjoy it or look at anything. Go right to the door that is, you know, open first. Well, if it's a... That's what being a theme park fan is.

Here's the thing, though. It's like his first time at Disneyland, so I want him to appreciate the cues. Right. Nice. That gets an ooh. It's a reference. Scott, here's the painting.

They're playing some sort of cosmic board game. Goblins being a bad sport and knocking it off. Have you seen that? No. And show it to me one more time. Oh. That legitimately blows my mind. I've seen it. I missed that. Wow, interesting. You must be in such panic.

Yes, yeah, yeah. You can't talk about it. Looking at the ground, thinking about my life, taking it all in in case things don't work out. and then there's me next to you like the Buddha under the Bodhi tree at total peace

we do have to talk about this right we are losing valuable minutes yeah that's true yes so to talk about I mean where to start I mean a big thing

that we have to talk about is songs and that is a very fun facet of this attraction. Why don't I just, like, I'm curious if there's a favorite. So I'm going to say them really quick. And if you know your favorite, I'll just wait for it.

Hopefully you have it locked and loaded already. Okay. Favorites, in terms of, and it could be song, but it could also be like, oh, this is just a fun match with the attraction and a good amount of drops and chaos. It's something about the chemistry. All right. We got Steppenwolf Born to be Wild.

Really? Wow. It's a pretty good one. Nothing. No, they're right. They're right. It's not the best. I was rolling my eyes at Steppenwolf.

I was like, is there anything interesting about Steppenwolf? And I found out the writer of that song, his name, man, is Mars Bonfire. Wow, really? Yes, the writer of the song and Steppenwolf. Real name, Dennis Edmonton. That's about right. Okay, what about Jackson 5, I Want You Back?

Solid candidate. Elvis Presley, Burning Love. Not really. Okay, I'm going to agree with that one. Edgar Winter Group, Free Ride. Yeah. That one's mine, I'm going to say. Parliament, Give Up the Funk.

I think that's up there. And Pat Benatar, hit me with your best shot. Was it between Ben and Morgan? It's a big split, yeah. And I want you back, potentially? Edgar Winner did good, too. Edgar Winner did do well. Congrats.

He always did, with everything. Looking cool. I thought Elvis didn't get it. I think Burning Love is more fun than the audience gave him credit for. That surprises me because I forget it's there. Yeah. It seems like... This doesn't match with some of the others in a way.

Yeah. I mean, I know this is not about the overlay, but just out of curiosity, who thinks Monsters After Dark is the best one? Yeah, it is. This is... Okay. Well, Monsters After Dark is the best one. Yeah, it is. This is, okay, well Monsters After Dark, really quick, this came up on the show for a second. That was the last step for me, because I knew

it was, at least I thought it was like a more intense drop pattern, I'm not totally sure if it is, but I was like really edgy that day. Griffin Newman was with us, XNL PTR legend Griffin Newman. There you go. Try that, Griffin.

And he brought up later, you were pretty edgy. And I think the reason I was edgy is because of the way that the experience and the song were built up by you, Mike. Because I feel like you had described it. And maybe I was projecting projecting and I'm scared anyway but I was imagining the most intense black metal math music Double bass drum

Yeah, exactly. All the gear I thought the song was going to be so terrifying and make it just kind of an agonizing The scariest song ever I feel like there was something that you said that made me think that and I guess this is my fault to be so terrifying and make it just kind of an agonizing experience. The scariest song ever. That's somehow, I feel like there was something that you said

that made me think that. And I guess this is my fault for how I processed it. But then getting on it and then hearing monsters after dark, monsters after dark. Well, hold on now.

Hold on. It is very loud. I'll say that. Yeah, yeah. That might be what you were referring to. Were you just terrified at the concept of like,

this ride takes place chronologically after the normal version of this ride? Boggled by the timeline. With Monsters After Dark, I really like that the cast members wear like fucked up versions of their normal uniform. There's like burn marks and like holes. And some people really

get into it and like i saw a video online where like the guy at the end like bursts in screaming to unload you and i and the whole car like jumped and i was like ah yeah you gotta i mean that seems really fun it's it's looked at yeah all that stuff is really great, and it's going to be in its own episode. Yeah! Probably for the best. Yeah, we've got to move here. This theater's going to shut down. So we should talk about, well, I don't know.

Mike, you take it. Yeah, well, I mean, the only thing I would say is on the Rip Ride Rocket at Universal, they have like songs and they have secret songs, which is really exciting to me. I forget how you do it. You have to punch in something on the screen to get different secret songs. Is that how it works, Jason? Yeah.

And if you punch in a really secret code, it'll just stop on that lift hill for hours at a time. If you spill soda on it or something. Yeah. All right, let me scoot. So people don't know there's also a secret menu of songs for this ride too. And I'm going to zoom through

some slides of Mr. Tom Morrow. We don't have time. More Tom Morrow content coming soon. So yeah, so here's some of the secret Pretty good, yeah Here you go I like So yeah, there's a lot of them actually Pretty good, yeah. Here you go. I like them. Five little friends.

So yeah, there's a lot of them actually. We're doing six of them. Rocket Unplugged, you and Star Games Rocks! Oppan Gangnam Style! Gangnam Style! Oppan Gangnam Style! Gangnam Style! yeah you do like a remember jason can you do it no i don't want to do it just a little though One of them. He does this, like, horse thing. Do they have to ride this? What's that? What are you doing? He does, like, a horse thing. That's a horse thing?

He does, like, after the one horse thing, he, like, kicks the side. That was something from the 20s. I'm going to blame that. I'm going to blame that on my bum leg. Yeah. My dear friends, this is also called monsters. That's your card.

Uh, here we go. How excited would you be if that played? No one would scream or anything. No, they wouldn't cry. I didn't wait too long. Rocket Unplugged, shoot! And start things right! I hurt myself today To see if I still feel I focus on the pain

Just a solemn ride The only thing That's real It usually makes you laugh That one makes you cry Yeah The needle tears a hole That old familiar sting

People might not know this one So you have to listen closely The rocket unlocks. Here it is. And start. The game's rock. Fast is slow. Low is high.

Stop is go. And that is why. Every second Wednesday is a hurdle. Oh, I know this. From eight to nine, all is well. Then I roll over on my shell and all. Because the world is turning turtle. Turtle.

Yeah. Day is night. Dog is cat. It's our favorite character top three from Mary Poppins Returns. This is saying something. This is saying something. Might be my least favorite runner. Might be number one.

Well, wait, Scott. How about this runner? Oh, no. I asked for it. My dear friends, this is the moment you have been waiting for. The rocket unclenched, huge, and stunning things rock! I think if you could become fully aware of what existed in the cigar store next door to this restaurant, I think it would just blow your brains out.

Have a real relationship with a person that goes on for years, well, that's completely unpredictable. That's why I think people have affairs. Andre Gregory Wallace-Shawn, folks. Okay. A great film. When I was younger,

I used to care about art and music, and now I'm 36, and I only care about hand scanning. That's a smart joke, boy. Topical. It's a meme going around, folks. You said it. You said it.

Well, geez. I mean, we've been blasting through this, and our time is winding down already, in typical fashion, where the ride has barely been discussed. Anything else we want to throw out? You know, I like everything that happens on it. All the little tableaus are a lot of fun, very confusing. They're like little TikToks. It's a tower of fun very confusing a lot just a bunch of they're like you know they're like

little tiktoks it's a tower of tiktoks uh yes there's there's funny batista stuff like two of the ride profiles he like jumps out of the monster's mouth and punches it in the face and goes you're welcome yeah uh and then at the every version at the end when you're going back into because you have to like go back backwards into the elevator shaft and then when you're resetting at the very end he goes like why are you thanking them they didn't do anything yes it's really quiet it's kind of quiet not really quiet but kind of quiet and you can easily miss it but it is funny and he is very funny in those movies uh all the yeah all the all the video things are pretty fun uh at the end you get to see cosmo has been freed which is so

so satisfying as a dog lover of myself you see the dog has been freed and they're getting in the ship ladies and gentlemen edwin i wish if that was possible it's an animal he like he humps the shit out of my leg everyone starts going wild pony pony plays as you're as you're walking out and i've never caught this but as you're walking out, and I've never caught this, but as you're walking out, you can hear the collector yelling, and apparently sometimes you can listen and you can hear Howard the Duck making fun of him, which I think is great. They used to sell stuffed Howard the Duck and stuffed Cosmo

in the exit. And so, I mean, they should bring that back, and we need more Howard the Duck-based content, you know? He's on What If, and it's Seth Green. Is that all correct? Yeah. All right. So those websites were correct.

And then the last thing I'll say, I've said it before, I think, on the show, is that at this point now I'm spoiled from the actual ride itself on Guardians that when I go on Tower in Orlando, the ride itself feels empty. I feel it's not as fun because it's just dark up and down and there's no soundtrack. There's nothing happening. Yeah, boo me all you want. The Hannibal Buress gif.

Boo me. You know I'm right. But they should now, with all the Towers, they should now with all the towers they should do it doesn't have to be fun but they should have music it doesn't have to be fun they should have music and effects as you go up

and down they should be opening the door and you see like Rod Serling or Burgess Meredith and he's his glasses are broken Shatner Shatner on the his glasses are broken Shatner Shatner on the plane opens it up Shatner's pointing at you

he's like I see them they're there on the outside of this yeah so do deep fake Burgess Meredith or young Shatner

oh you're speaking my language now all the all the famous episodes you know it is weird I think that now this type of attraction, the Tower of Terror, at any point

was just one drop and that's the end of it. The multiple drops and the up and down and the back and forth is so clearly so much of the experience. And this thing is just so chaotic. You don't know what's going to happen when a door opens.

You don't know where you're going to be. It's a blast. They did a great job with it. They overcame everything Slate thought and everything we all thought. I think it's just such a great, fun experience. It's maybe my favorite ride at Disneyland. That's an applause I was going to ask for.

And I know it was mixed on do we like that they did or not, but are there people here who would say favorite ride? Wow. Yeah. All right. I'm sorry. I wish I had a classier choice. What's class? Great moments with Mr. Lincoln. Yeah.

Something where you learn. Oh, and you know we also haven't mentioned is that disneyland that's great see that's what i was thinking like rocket so rocket has knowledge of theme parks on earth yeah but is he more of a casual fan and the collector is the big fan it's still funny to think about Rocket going like, I'm sick of universal screen rides. Seems like JPEG stepped in it again. He has opinions, we know. Yeah.

So. But that's sort of bringing us to the end of our time, except for one thing And I would call this a plus up We talked about alternate music that they could do And it's classic rock, right? There's a lot of classic rock But you know what else is a classic already

After just five years is this attraction It's Guardians of the Galaxy Mission Breakout. It's true. Every bit of it, the lore, the info dumps, the pre-shows, the complicated backstory.

It's already classic and I think that in the future they could acknowledge it and own it and make their own mythology part of the experience and part of the music.

And that is why we prepared a little something. Disney, if you're listening, first of all, sorry about all this stuff up until now. But besides that, you might want to consider

throwing this little ditty into the mix. Alright, here we go. Oh yeah I'll tell you something My hands they do not scan So I've got a new plan They gotta scan your hands They gotta scan your hands They gotta scan your hands They gotta scan your hands

To see the collection Of Tantalir Tiffan You need special clearance They gotta scan your hands They gotta scan your hands They gotta scan your hands And when they scan you in the gantry It's fine

You'll get the clearance Cause your hands they ain't mine they ain't mine they ain't mine okay everybody oh yeah i'll tell you something my hands they do not scan so i got a new plan They gotta scan your hands They gotta scan your hands They gotta scan your hands They gotta scan your hands You survived Fuck gets the red light

Thank you Thank you all so much for coming out Thanks to Dynasty Typewriter Thanks to Eileen in the booth. Thanks to Aaron Gardner for helping on the logo and for ironing my shirt. And thanks to all of you

so much for coming out. We've missed you so much. Thanks for not forgetting about us in two years. Thank you. Thank you. Produced by Mike Carlson, Jason Sheridan, Scott Gairdner, Brett Boehm, Joe Cilio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts, please visit foreverdogpodcasts.com and subscribe to our shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Keep up with the latest Forever Dog news by following us on Twitter and Instagram

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