Podcast: The Ride - Rock 'n' Roller Coaster Starring Aerosmith

Episode Date: April 20, 2018

You're not going to wannna miss a thing when the good boys of Podcast: the Ride talk about the bad boys from Boston and their rockin' ride. Listen to Podcast: The Ride Ad-Free on Forever Dog Plus: https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/podcasts/ FOLLOW PODCAST: THE RIDE: https://twitter.com/PodcastTheRide https://www.instagram.com/podcasttheride BUY PODCAST: THE RIDE MERCH: https://www.teepublic.com/stores/podcast-the-ride PODCAST THE RIDE IS A FOREVER DOG PODCAST https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/podcasts/podcast-the-ride Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Warning, today's podcast may include Hollywood vampires, guns that shoot CDs, a Californication revelation, and an in-depth look at the ride featuring the bad boys from Boston, Rock and Roller Coaster, starring Aerosmith. Yes, we're the ones that jaded you. It's Podcast The Ride, the show hosted by three men who at best could be described as late bloomers, but even that's a reach. I'm Jason Sheridan, joined as always by Scott Gairdner. Hi, Jason. Hi. And Mike Carlson. Yeah, hi, Jason. Thank you for that.

I was a late bloomer. I guess I'm still blooming, if you really think about it. Hey, we all are. Yeah, I guess we are. Who's to say what a not magical world it would be if the blooming process was ever totally complete that's a good that's a good point we should all aspire to keep blooming even into our golden years well we're all always students of life aren't we yeah i guess we are right you have a real professorial vibe to you today yeah this is kind of like this this

wistfulness uh this wistful intimacy I feel like we have right now without a guest. It's just the three of us. No one to introduce. I don't know. I think it allows us to be in this sensitive headspace, whatever it is, which pairs great with the rock music themed ride we'll

be talking about. I mean, look, once we get into this talk, we're going to transform from three thoughtful professorial types to three dirty dogs. And I'm not talking about Edwin, the official show dog who's lying on the couch, already starting to fall asleep at the sound of these three men talking.

I will take a photo of the official show dog right now during the show, and I will post it. Oh, yes. Well, now that photo of the official show dog right now during the show and i will post it oh yes well now that we've oh yeah people love that picture exposed our show dog to the to the twitter edwin the podcast the ride show dog yeah part of the mythology uh um you know i uh before we get going too far uh there's a little bit of theme park information that just came across my desk, as it were. And just to get you guys into it, I want to do a little bit of word association, because this is a word that I was not previously aware of, and I want to see if you guys are. So I'm going to say a word. Okay.

And tell me if the word has any significance to you. Okay. Okay. The word is helix. Helix. Can you spell that? I sure can. It is spelled H-A-L-Y-X.

YX, helix. No, I don't. Am I supposed to word associate? Like, is it for a psychologist's office or no? Does it just mean do I know anything about it? Well, does it make you? Not necessarily. Helix sounds like helix.

I think of helix, which is I think of a roller coaster. Sure. Yeah, yeah. That makes sense. Well, look, I mean, it's a funky spelling. It's a pretty wild spelling, which I think indicates... Three consonants. Yeah, all in a row.

All in a row. It makes me think of like a K'nex set. Like one of those cool, like not, you know what I'm talking about? Like it was like yeah oh yeah i had a y and x of a roller coaster oh yeah well there you go was it a helix set is that what you're getting at i well i am not well here's here's what helix is i'm so excited to get to i'm so excited you guys don't previously know about helix it's a it's a proprietary thing? Like a very specific thing? This is a Disney property.

Perhaps the least utilized great Disney property. And here's what Halix is. Halix was a band that was invented specifically for Disneyland that played at the Tomorrowland stage in the early 80s that was meant to combine the appeal of the band Kiss with the Star Wars franchise. No way. What?

And I'm now going to show you a photograph of Halux. Whoa, what? Look at this. This is wild. Check the Twitter. Look up Google Halux if you're listening to this. If you're driving, get off the road or keep driving and immediately check out Halux, worth the potential collision. Oh, wow.

If you want to help me describe what I'm looking at, this is a... I'm looking at it too now. Posse of musical Ravskallions. You've got sort of a Rick Springfield dude in a puffy 80s jacket. You've got...

It's very Battlestar Galactica in look. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Even costuming. uh you've got uh what is you know sort of a battle star galactica and look yeah yeah even costuming uh-huh uh-huh very very yeah 80s 70s 80s space for sure you've got kind of a solid gold dancer dude sort of a jufro vibe a couple more solid gold dancers in the back and then kind of a big an abominable snowman and he looks he looks like the guy that Luke cuts open. Or Luke kills in the cave in Empire. Ah, right, right. I don't know what that is called.

I know the Tauntaun is the beast that Luke rides on. I don't know what this guy is called. Nothing that big in the band. Look, it's an armada of humans and creatures who unite with their common interest in the power of rock. So I found out about this because, as I told you guys off the air, I met a gentleman who worked for Disney in the early 80s. And we were sort of doing our little, like, Disney nerd off. As you do, you just start dropping references and see how far you can go. And I said, oh, you know, we just did an episode about Videopolis.

And he was like, oh, I was at the opening of Videopolis. Damn, I'm losing. And then he threw out, well, you know about Halix, right? I do not know about Halix. You know, it was Disney's Kiss. What the, oh, what are you talking about? So I immediately looked up everything about Halix. I had to really suppress not telling you guys.

I wanted to tell you here in the moment. So, yeah, they played at the Tomorrowland stage, which is where the Captain EO Theater is now, although what is currently Star Wars previews into Oblivion. I don't think we're getting rid of that Path of the Jedi thing. No, that'll be there until 2030 at least. Way past when many trilogies have come out. We'll still be looking at it.

Like the younglings who become Padawans, the path of the Jedi never ends. For even when you become master, there's still a lot more to learn. And even when one trilogy is over, seven more start, apparently. Seven more. Hey, everyone gets a trilogy now.

Y'all get them. Hey, depending on how meetings go this week, we might end up with a trilogy. Yeah, hopefully. Oh, wow. There's Star Wars how meetings go this week, we might end up with a trilogy. Yeah, hopefully. There's a Star Wars meeting this week that we're already plugging on a podcast. We're as primed as anybody. Anyway, so this is a band that performed basically under Space Mountain, the greatest venue in the world. I would have to think for a band.

And okay, so yeah,ney wanted to have some summer entertainment they wanted to bring rock into the uh into the disney fold and there i don't think had been you know we're talking about aerosmiths rock and roller coaster today i think this might be the first attempt to get rock music into disneyland um so this was put together a guy named jim magon uh helped supervise it a guy who later wrote for Darkwing Duck, Tailspin, Goof Troop, A Goofy Movie. A guy who in the 90s was one of their primary writers. And he has a personal website where he, sadly, as far as I could tell, there's like a part one and part two of the Halix story. And part three was never done.

It was like six years ago. So, hey, Jim, spelled J-Y-M-N, a similarly odd spelling as Halix. Similarly very unique. Get to your part three. I want to know the full Halix tale. So, yeah, Disney wanted to put together a rock band. They enlisted the help of a guy named Mike Post.

Does Mike Post mean anything to you? No. This is the guy who did like all of the 80s, 90s, 70s theme songs, primarily known probably for Greatest American Hero. Right. Believe it or not, I'm walking. Which was the first dance at my wedding. Sure. He also did, I didn't realize,

and utterly unsurprising news, he also, this guy did, wait, the full list, Magnum P.I., Blossom, My Opinionation. This guy's a titan. Yeah, Doogie Howser, Hill Street Blues, Quantum Leap, NYPD Blue, the full list magnum pi blossom my opinionation this guy's a titan um yeah doogie hauser hill street blues quantum leap nypd blue and then like don't don't law and order is him he did don't don't but before he was quite the industry titan that he is today he put together the songs for a star wars themed rock band an open cast and call was done and they put together this odd little posse.

Probably the most notable thing if you're looking at art of this is that there is a robot who has like kind of a full cart apparatus around him. And so this guy had to play keyboards in a full like droid costume and inside a vehicle, I'll show you guys this uh they like took an industrial

golf cart and put space dude ads all over it and then built a profit five synthesizer into the vehicle so andy is wearing like robot gloves so this dude is driving a cart around the stage because they didn't want the keyboard player to be stationary. This is a space band. We need to revolutionize. You gotta move around. Space is about movement. Certainly. I was sleepy before this and it feels like you shot the

Pulp Fiction needle into my heart with adrenaline hearing that there was a space band with aliens at Disneyland in the 80s. This is insane. Robots, aliens, and then just regular cool people. Just guys who look like they'd be on, they look straight out of the movie Semi-Pro. Yeah, they're phenomenal.

It's hard to just describe this. We'll post pictures, see what we're looking at. But also, it's one of those things, you know how we love to romanticize and talk about the Chuck E. Cheese band, the Rockafire explosion, and how all these things have this deep mythology and names that people keep track of and only people like us care about. This band, not the case.

They didn't bother to name anybody. There's nothing you can look up. No names. Yeah, kind of disappointing. And everyone involved in this project universally just calls the big guy a Wookiee. Even though he's clearly not a Wookiee. He is white. He is an abominable snowman.

But they're like, ah, you know, and then the Wookiee base. They were using it like, when you say Kleenex, when you mean like tissue. They were just like a big hairy guy at that point was just a Wookiee, even though it was not a brand. It was not an on-brand Wookiee. It's a type. Yeah, yeah. Whether it's the bottom shelf of the cereal aisle or also all those costumes very clearly like half trying to look like

star wars and the other half working very hard to skirt the line so they don't get sued for copyright infringement or like the keyboard player is basically a stormtrooper but then there's just kind of like sun raw space Egyptians and tight gold pants. I don't know. The whole thing, there's a real aesthetic happening here. Just to say the whole history of it. Also, they went through different names and styles. I'm looking at concept art of the original name of the band Starfire, one word.

They also thought about calling it Strike. And they thought about calling it Squad and they thought about calling it squad skwad before finally landing on helix they all agree they didn't know what the word helix meant but let's call it that it's cool so not only a keyboard player driving a golf cart around but also a wookiee bass player and who has to play bass in a mask and gloves and he's really doing it there is no pre-recorded anything going on he's covered in yak fur that's what the suit was made from and then the percussionist of the band not particularly themed but he is doing somersaults and backflips with a rope when he is not being called on to hit mallets and wind chimes. This seems

to me like the finest band. This is the best band, I think. This is my favorite band, I think. Without having heard anything, you just know from pictures. I know that this is my favorite band. I googled this as soon as you were telling me about it, and I found out there's a YouTube

video that says, Halix performs Jailbait. Yes, I've heard the song Jbait uh if i could approximate original songs they are original songs written by the guy who wrote don't don't uh uh and and blossoms my opinionation he his uh the pedigree is very high and uh uh well so there's yeah there, there's Jailbait, which if I could approximate the chorus, it's a female singer. Well, I want you, but you're Jailbait. Who approved that at Disneyland? Yeah, this is a song being played only at Disneyland. There's no other venue for this.

And they're doing a song about Jailbait. And the common scenario of a woman who is lusting after an underage boy. Was she also a space high school teacher? Is that a part of the canon? Oh, they didn't have a canon. So I'm going to add that to the legend of this. Yeah, that might help justify their lyrics. I'm going to add that every lyric is justified at the end by going,

and we're in space. Laws are different here. Don't forget, we're in space. We're talking space. Laws are different here. Don't forget, we're in space. We're talking space years. But although, no matter what the years are, if you are jailbait... That concept is universal, regardless of... Right, if they're using that term, unless it totally means something different in space... Unless jail isn't as much of a problem.

Jail is good in space. I guess in the space of Helix, yes. It's not so bad. It turned out that Han Solo and Luke Skywalker. No, I fucked that up. Han Solo and Princess Leia turned out to almost be jailbait for Luke Skywalker in Empire Strikes Back. Oh, yes, sure. We really walked around with that one.

Literal, I know, I walked and tripped down the stairs along the way. A different reason you would go to jail for a space relationship. I don't have the song, I don't have that song pulled, but I do have a song called Lightning. So,

here now, ladies and gentlemen, a little brief taste of Halix. This is my favorite band. Ladies and gentlemen, a little brief taste of Halix. This is my favorite band. Ladies and gentlemen, Halix. I mean, that's kind of the vibe you need. But if that's where you're starting, you know it's only getting better from there. That's crazy. Not a lot of views on these videos.

I feel like a lot of people do not know about Halix. Wow. I want to get the word out. The sound there is sort of a foreigner meets Toto, meets Bon Jovi's Runaway. Like a vocoder at the start that sounds sort of like Main Street Electrical Parade a little bit. They got that vibe with the Main Street Electrical Parade still in action at the time. I mean, I feel like if I'd been, if I was going to Disneyland in this era,

that would have been one of the three things I talked about. I'm not sure I'd be excited about Pirates of the Caribbean as much as this band with the Wookiee and the guy driving his keyboard around. Well, let's real quick. What would you give up to have Halix be in the park today? In the same version, doing the same songs. Is this some sort of monkey's park?

Oh, no. You have a simpler idea. I thought you were trying to get us to give up our souls or like loved ones. Yeah, that helps. I want Halix in the park now and I'm wondering what I would give up for it. You mean like an attraction. Something's got to go. Yeah, it's a big attraction.

Something's got to go, but Halix can come back. It's a trade with the devil. The devil is at your door. Autopia. He says, that's easy, though. But it's a launch bay. Well, hang on. What if they're in the Autopia track?

What if you're driving around them? They have to play all day in the sun around the Autopia track. They sure do're driving around them? They have to play all day in the sun around the Autopia track. They sure do to make up for their many years of absence. Helix has got to sweat it out in the sun and we'll be better off for it. And they take all the Autopia cars and they put keyboards in them

so you can play along just like the unnamed robot man. Toontown? Kids, we're getting rid of Toontown. I'll get rid of the Matterhorn. about that hey for helix um kidding me yeah well again what if they transform that the much hallowed um uh basketball court they take they turn that into like a private helix club oh man see a secret show at disneyland you kidding me? You got to line up outside the Matterhorn and get in. Unannounced concerts.

I'm sure this would take. It is your reward for actually climbing the mountain. You have to. You have to climb to get in to see Helix. Yes, yeah, yeah. There's a danger element. You got to show how much you want it. But then that mountain sort of becomes a space mountain also,

so it's sort of a second space mountain because they have to be playing in space. Yeah well look it's overlooking uh tomorrowland i think yeah i think you can it's fine with that it's kind of on the border but that's sort of pulling it over um helix wow this reminds me the concept of uh disney making a band reminds me of a thing that i have to occasionally look up and remind myself to make sure I didn't hallucinate it is Devo 2.0.

Have we talked about Devo 2.0? Not in this setting. We haven't. I know about Devo 2.0. Yeah, Devo 2.0. According to Wikipedia, a quintet created for Walt Disney Records of child actors who sing and dance

and in the music videos and photo shoots mine playing instruments along the songs re-recorded by some of the original members of Devo and this album I guess there was an album and a DVD came out in 2006 and I

in the spring of 2006 I would have been at Disney World in the summer of 2006, I would have been at Disney World in the summer of 2006. I just remember signs everywhere for Devo 2.0. And I kind of knew about Devo. I wasn't the biggest Devo. I'm still, I like Devo, but I'm not. There's some people who are like, Devo, man.

Like, Devo fans. That's one of their guys. I think of that era. Yeah, they've attracted a particular which i've gone in and out of i i know them a little deeper than uh other people yeah but it didn't make me any happier to hear about devo 2.0 i'll tell you no and and i i guess my equivalent band would have been the pixies like in college i got really into the pixies and read a lot about them and went to one of the reunion shows and that sort of thing and then for some people that was the devo reunion but yeah devo

2.0 is just all these signs with kids and and like i feel like on the bus they were playing like the songs they're like check out devo 2.0 and i'm like i don't get that and then some people have tried to explain it's like well in the mythology of, it makes sense because it's all about consumerism. And then there's all this backstory about Devo that I get little bits and pieces of sometimes. And I don't quite understand it. But look, I'm into backstory stuff. So I'm sure I would enjoy it if I went a little deeper. I like the idea that a band is commenting on the de-evolution of society and culture.

There's some truth to that. However, that justifies you putting out a cash grab kids record and having the song Whip It be turned into Swiff It in Swiffer commercials. I feel like they have taken a little too much license in saying, oh, no, no, no, but we are being subversive. I've heard about Mother like, Mothersbaugh doing, like, backwards messages in Devo songs.

Like, he's doing a song for a commercial, but then it's actually a backwards voice saying, corporations control your mind, and nobody even knew it was in there. But you're still, like, getting a check from the vacuum company. I don't know. I think I've always had an issue not saying i wouldn't do it not saying uh oh yeah well that's the thing yeah just sell out all the

way yeah sure everyone has um yeah maybe his mind is more focused on his uh two decades of movie soundtrack his wonderful movie soundtracks there's a lot of good ones. Oh, look, I'm a Mark Mothersbaugh fan. It's this particular line of logic that I have an issue with. I can't believe Devo 2.0 was given concert space at Disney World. I wonder if they drew a crowd. Oh, I didn't see that. I just saw posters for by the album. Oh, gotcha. I think they were playing it in part,

or certainly probably blasting it in downtown Disney or whatever at the time. And then kids without knowing it are suddenly on the drive home asking their parents, are corporations actually controlling us, dad? Fun fact, one of the members of Devo 2.0 was the actress Jacqueline Emerson, who went on to be in the Hunger Games. How about that? Oh, wow.

So, good for Miss Emerson. Spreading the subversive vibes still to this day. Well, if you're going to compare... Well, hey, actually, that ties it in because whereas now Disney has the full record label and they have a mechanism on which to put out great rock music like Devo 2.0, they were not comfortable with putting out... So also, they cut a Helix record. There was an album produced by this legit producer of... It was...

Disney was not comfortable putting it out on their label because Walt Disney Records was like Cinderella storybooks and that kind of thing. Oh boy. And we're looking at a hell of a poster here. Is that uh real or i don't know do you think uh i think i think that might be official i think it looks real to me it looks so cool it looks so of its time it's perfect yeah yeah it's very much it's not just the star wars vibe but a little flash gordon too it's kind of all the craziest 70s 80s uh uh laser excess and so yeah they similar to that disney didn't want to put out adult films uh on their own label so they

did touchstone and other things right uh they put they were going to put the helix record out on electra records miss still major record label and then it got bought by something else and the new head of the as often happens the new head of the label was not it was some inhuman monster who didn't want a space band getting released but like oh there's got to be bootleg there's got is there a leak is there a bootleg you would have to find it right now i couldn't i couldn't find it i dug a little bit uh interrupt all proceedings if you find it but i'll just put out generally into the world that if there is a helix record out there if anybody has it please cede it to us our dms are open yeah dms are open and and maybe maybe do some advance so if anyone out there is on the dark web

uh turn your turn your bitcoin mining uh setups into searching. Find us, Halix. Find us with the most powerful dark web search engines that you're like hackers flying through the world wide web. Find us, Halix. Do something that matters. Help three nerds hear an album where a robot sings about a woman wanting to have sex with a minor.

Oh, that's all I want. We finally have a goal. We have something to look forward to in our lives. I have the song Jailbait, right? You heard that? And there's also a song His Heart. These are all live recordings. They're all excellent. I enjoy

all of it. We'll see these out there. But here's a bigger proposition I have, which is we're about to get, you talk about bringing Halix back, we're about to get a great new venue put into the park, the cantina, the Star Wars Galaxy's Edge. Pulling the thoughts right out of my brain. Uh-huh, uh-huh.

We have DJ Rex coming, which is very exciting for you star tours fans we're of rex the original captain of the of the star speeder scott you love you're a big rex fan i'm pretty excited i don't know if there's something that seems a little cheesy about this use of him and also how is this bumbling pilot suddenly a confident, cool DJ? Well, I don't think he is a confident, cool DJ. Maybe he's not. I think he's a bumbling DJ. Maybe he's knocking records over.

I'm pretty sure that's going to be the angle. Spilling glasses. How do we know that piloting Star Tours vessels was not his 9-to-5 day job and DJing was his true passion? If he introduced himself to a person on the street, he would say, I'm a DJ. But on the side, I'm perhaps. Well, like current Uber and Lyft drivers,

he considers his primary function a DJ. Pretty ahead of its time, actually. But I'm excited to see him come back. And I'm glad he's going to be manning the stage. But I'm saying, I don't know what's going on there in terms of it being an actual venue, but this seems to me like a place for Halix to retake their mantle. And not only that, but there is kind of, there's a little

history of robotic or futuristic bands in the Disney and or Star Wars universe. You have the Max Rebo band from Return of the Jedi. You have, I can only imagine, Max Rebo is an elephant, and he must be friends with or a relative of Hooter,

who ends up playing music with Captain EO in the climactic final musical battle. I think you could get Hooter and the gang banging on their metallic trash cans or whatever's going on there. Yeah, let's get all these bands. Oh, and also, with the news about Chuck E. Cheese and Chuck E. Cheese's band disappearing, Munch's Make Believe band, there's going to be a lot of out-of-work Chuck E. Cheese animatronics. Why don't we get them into the canteen as well? That's great, too.

It's an animatronic surplus, right? It's like Americaica sings all over again i'll take i'll take your idea i'll see it one better the three of us uh will be in helix yes we'll play in the band we will take off from whatever we have to do next summer whenever this opens uh we'll put jason in that thing that writing thing he plays keyboard he doesn't have to play it's just a track or whatever. I play a little. Scott plays a little. I think we should be helix. I will take

some classes. I'll learn gymnastics. I'll take up the role of the somersaulting percussionist. This might also be the only way we get into Star Wars land. If Armageddon they seem to be preparing for an end of the world sort of scenario.

Yeah, the crowds. I don't know that the performers will even get to go on the rides for months. They might just put a black bag over your head and rush you into the cantina and that'll be it. Yeah, I think from what we're talking about that there's going to be, we've learned that there's potentially a lot of restrictions on annual pass holders, and can they get into Star Wars for the first summer or not?

Like, different levels will be. It sounds like you might get punished for being an annual pass holder. Yes. I think you're going to be outside of Galaxy's Edge, and there's going to be big people cages. It's going to be like a Children of Men scenario where people are caught in the hinterlands between borders

and dark dogs are barking at them and pushing them into the corner. I don't know. I'm a little worried about border chaos at Galaxy's Edge. It's going to be a nightmare. Unless we're Halix. Unless we can soothe the beast

with our musical tunes and our hyper-futuristic golf cart. Hey, guys, put your differences aside and check this out. Space boy, you're my space boy. Wow, he's right. Let's hug it out. Let's hug it out. We've launched a lot of different campaigns lately, but I do think, let me see,

hashtag podcast the ride boys for Halix. Is that a hashtag? Or how about just, let's tie it all together, Halix 2.0. Hashtag Halix 2.0. Halix 2.0. Halix 2.0, yeah. If they start feeling the street team power that is building about Halix 2.0. Halix 2.0, yeah. If they start feeling the street team power

that is building about Halix 2.0, they'll be sure to, if they know it's gonna get, I think we virally could get equal attention to Star Wars Galaxy's Edge. Just so we're on the same page, that's Halix 2, the number two,

the word point, and the number zero. Because if you put a period in 2.0, it will break the hashtag. Oh, that's a good point. No punctuation. Okay. So a helix, the number two, the word point, and zero. We'll show you online.

Should we also, in keeping with the bizarre spelling, should there be an extra y in there or maybe the i in point is a one or an exclamation point um you know i'm just saying while we're having fun with this and complicating it we might need to uh get a whiteboard out and workshop this a little so uh check out the twitter after this episode goes live we will keep uh noodling with this and we will determine what the hashtag is and hopefully it'll be ready by the time you're checking out the Twitter.

Thanks again for, I know we give you a lot of assignments. There's a lot of supplemental reading and homework on this podcast. That's what I love about theme parks, homework. After you've listened to three guys talk for an hour and a half perhaps more perhaps many

more uh then go read further essays um and uh do do voting and street team work uh why if we had our druthers people would have to read all about these parks to even be allowed in to understand you would have to pass a written exam to get into Star Wars land. Why should you come to Galaxy's Edge? You don't know what was here before. You don't know it was the Hunchback of Notre Dame Festival of Fools and also backstage storage area stables. Prove your worth before you enter Galaxy's Edge.

Yes. All right. Well, we're tossing a lot out there but mainly uh above all else check out helix so you can truly appreciate helix 2.0 um so uh from the beginnings of rock in the disney parks to the uh some grand total the uh highest helix they ever reached worldwide status yeah uh uh let's uh let's start talking about the rock and rock in roller coaster starring aerosmith or as it as it is known in paris rock and roller coaster avec aerosmith right um uh whichever you french player um i think we should start by um what is each of our personal relationship with aerosmith that's exactly what i wanted yeah right talk about

i think it's important to calibrate this uh i'll go first uh i did got into like listening to like popular music a little late my mom force fed me herman Herman's Hermits and the Beatles, but mostly just the pop stuff, not the psychedelic stuff. And like 60s pop music. So when I was like 13 or 14, then I started getting into the cool stuff. We're talking the Cardigans, Love Fool. We're talking anything that was on the radio. That, by the way, is a great song. Paula Cole.

Paula Cole, sure. All that cool stuff. And then at that point, my parents were like, oh, he's getting into rock and roll music. So then they started buying me Best of Led Zeppelin and Best of this and then Best of Aerosmith. And man, I loved Aerosmith. I'll tell you what. All right. I loved Aerosmith.

I thought they were great. I liked the Don't Want to Miss a Thing. I liked Armageddon. I liked that song. I was very basic at the time, I guess you would say, with music. And boy, there was no song I loved more by Aerosmith than 1999's Jaded. I was going to say, I think that is still my current favorite. A pretty good song that I still kind of like to this day.

It would have been the right age, got a lot of play on the radio, probably got some play at school dances, right? Does that sound right? Yeah, a little bit. I remember I was at a school dance, and I was dancing. It was like a slow dance, and it was I Don't Want to Miss a Thing. And I remember the girl who went with me at the time, they started playing, and she went, oh.

And I was like, what? I went i went what you pushed her to the ground but she had a cool she liked weezer and like the like cool stuff that i didn't even like that other platinum selling the cooler i wasn't cool enough to be like 17 i got in weez when I was 18. Maybe around that same time, but I wasn't way in yet. I am, as Jason said, a late bloomer. So, yeah, I really like Daryl Smith. There was a song called Girls of Summer on a Greatest Hits. Oh, that's good!

I like that one. Some girls... You know what? I think we tend to like these sort of generic pretty good pop songs. I think any band that had bought those songs would have gotten something out of them. I don't know actually who wrote those songs, but in the 80s,

they've kind of famously started writing with five different songwriters at once, and all their hit they had. I don't want to miss a thing. Diane Warren, the most balladeer. That was the very end of the insane selling albums era. I feel like. Insane CD selling. I don't want to miss a thing.

A couple years left after 1999. Two years, but yeah. They were compilations and stuff. What a weird take that we have on it. Because you like Jaded and you like this Girls of Summer song. And I specifically bought a single of the song Pink. Oh, yeah.

I continue to like Pink, okay. Pink is not a bad song. We'll get into that. It's a dirty song. Oh, yeah. But it's a very catchy. Joe Perry, I think, famously was a little upset that of all these like pop songs he wanted to rock a little harder but mr stephen tyler likes having hits yeah didn't joe perry end up in some

say triani sort of uh like noodley indulgent jammy band he's in a chicken foot no he's not a chicken foot uh this is this sort of tips my bit at the end But he's in the Hollywood Vampires Oh that's what The J. Lee Depp Alice Cooper band And I'm sure he's He's in his own He's had some solo albums as well But he's very much like a rock and roll guy

And I think he was fighting With Steven about like having all these pop songs But Steven wanted hits Steven didn't care I think Steven probably likes you know pop music more than this show does similar to the tension between brian wilson and mike love the beach boys and probably at various times mick and keith and john and paul except there is no genius anywhere in this scenario there less of, like there's a few, few, I'm about 25%

I feel like through my Aerosmith feelings. I feel, I'm going to come back in an hour because this scene's right in your guys' wheelhouse.

Yes, it is. Yeah, now I'm having 500 thoughts at once. I will say like the riff in Sweet Emotion is still awesome.

That is a very good riff and it's cool, and I will listen to that any time. Richard Linklater would agree with you. Yes, Richard Linklater and I. Do I like 70s Aerosmith? I don't know. Walk This Way doesn't hold up so much for me.

No, I find that sort of corny, and I have a real, I get embarrassment goosebumps very easily if I think something is like corny and hokey. I sort of, the hairs stand on my arm and I find- Like a spider sense you would say? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

My cheesy sense is tingling, which happens during theme park shows a lot. Yeah, sure. Yeah, you're gonna get a lot of corniness there. But I think the super bowl halftime show that they did with in sync where then they are joined by nelly and britney spears and they all do and they're all like walking back and forth and in syncs doing like pop locks it's happening my hand my hairs are standing standing. I get such sheer embarrassment for a big cornball musical number

that I have a literal bodily reaction to it. I believe if we go back and watch that, Joe Perry's having the same reaction. I'm sure he was rolling his eyes when they pitched him all that stuff. The hair on the top of his head. But Stephen was like, yeah, wow, that's great. All of those people in one halftime show. How much money? How much money would that have cost? I mean, I guess that's an amazing marketing at the time.

All deals, there's all deals happening. Also, there was like a filmed segment before everybody came out with like Ben Stiller and Chris Rock, because it was an MTV produced halftime show. So not only that, they had to pay Stiller and Rock to do like improvised cameos for this thing. Ben Stiller used to be great at those little pre-show sketch sort of things. That was his wheel.

And TV awards with him and Tom Cruise. Zoolander, born from the VH1 fashion awards. Oh, yeah. Yeah, a rare film made out of award show sketches, which they tried to do with, oh no, Les Grossman, the Tom Cruise character, is from Tropic Thunder, but then he did like a big dance at the MTV Movie Awards, which they were, it seemed to be them,

that was like their fundraising effort to make the Les Grossman movie, which sadly did not occur. Did not happen. Anyway, we're off the track. Wait, Jason, what's your feeling? Yeah, sure. I think I said this before when Led Zeppelin came up,

but I knew them as a huge band, and I would hear the singles on the radio or they played it in the mall or at theme parks and stuff. I don't think I've ever owned an Aerosmith record. I don't think I've ever heard an Aerosmith record start to finish. But I knew the hits. I think I probably knew all the hits. I bet there are people who have Aerosmith tattoos

who have not heard an album all the way through. Yes, that's true. I guess I probably knew a lot of what would be on the greatest hits. I mean, when I would have been in middle school and we started going to dances and all high school, I mean, Don't Want to Miss a Thing and Jaded were huge hits. So they were certainly being played there. So I probably knew them best.

The fact that there's potentially people more in Aerosmith's era and who like them more who are possibly screaming about the fact that all we... Oh, yeah, I like them. I like Jaded. I don't want to miss a thing. We are not referring remotely to 70s, 80s, to the Alicia Silverstone era. I praised the Sweet Emotion riff. You did.

That's a cool riff. What did. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, that's great. That's a cool riff. What else do I like? Dream On. I think I like Dream On. It's okay, right? Yeah. Dream On is okay.

It's not- We're classic rock fans. I don't know that we really need to think about Dream On for too long. I like, I'm looking at just the greatest hits right now. Mama Kin. Do we know that song? I don't. That's kind of a fun song.

I'm not going to sing it, but that's fun. Oh, don't that's kind of a fun song i'm not gonna sing it oh i guess that's that's probably a big place i knew there there is uh i grew up with 1029 mgk in philadelphia classic rock okay and they they i think would play there would be some aris smith in there for sure back in the saddle don't know it i'm back in the saddle again it's a very obnoxious they're pretty uh they're pretty bluesy which i think eliminates me from a lot of musical runnings the more bluesy it is and they did an entire album yes i have that album yeah what's what's it called uh it's called honking on bobo why oh this is another thing with aero smith it's all just like, just the lamest, bawdy, dirty crap.

Cheeky. It's like there's like one of their albums is like one car humping another car. It's just some lame. How did I forget about Honkin' on Bobo? That's what I wanted to call my Seth MacFarlane crooner-esque album where I sang American Songbook standards, and then Aerosmith sued me. You know, it's weird that I forgot about that. It's a chapter.

I try to not bring it up around you, but since it's out there. Even I've buried it. You'd think I would have brought it up very first thing when asked, what is my relationship with Aerosmith? The lawsuit. Yes. The lawsuit. Big Ones, which of course is dicks.

They famously covered Big Ten Inch inch which is an old blues song it's an innuendo for a giant dick is the fact that they covered the beatles come together were they thinking oh boy maybe even even their covers are sexualized uh i'm gonna say that is right uh here's a big thing i remember knowing about aerosmith was it was like when did did this come out in the 90s that Steven Tyler was Liv Tyler's father? Mm-hmm. And I remember that being news

and just a fact I learned. I think I just knew it as like, oh, oddly enough, Steven Tyler is Liv Tyler's father. Not like, Steven Tyler was Liv Tyler's father and he didn't claim paternity for years. Like, I didn't know the second part.

Yeah, and that she grew up thinking one of my favorite musicians todd rungren was her father oh that's crazy i don't think i realized that from one to another very strangely because who's the mom uh yeah yeah yeah yeah um and then well which then once they got back together once uh father and daughter are friendly again, what do you do but put her in a highly sexualized, lesbian-themed music video? If Trump were a rock star, that's what Trump would have done. Trump would have put Ivanka in all of these, like, sexy videos and, like... Really get the hair blowing.

Yeah, get her, like, on set just directing her, yeah. Get that long sweater she's wearing flapping in the breeze uh were you guys into the alicia silverstone i liked them at the time i like them less now i liked crying okay uh amazing i feel like is the worst of the three oh it is but then my favorite because it's got like digital tunnels and and uh yes virtual shit i probably should i haven't listened to it in a long time. Crying, what's crazy? Crazy is okay.

Crying, I feel like, was my favorite at the time. The best song probably of the trilogy? Probably the best song is Crying. The videos, I guess, the videos are good of their time. They're very of their time. I haven't watched them in a while. Yeah. Well, I mean, the point is, I don't think this is an uncommon level of fandom for Aerosmith.

Like, am I, I don't know. Are there people who are, if you're like really into music, or if you're a music critic, do you like Aerosmith? I don't think so. But at the same time, I don't think it produces like animosity, like Big Lebowski, I hate the fucking Eagles level animosity. Yeah, I think you're right. And even I don't dislike Aerosmith. I've had some good times with Aerosmith songs playing. But you know what?

What I'm saying is they would not be my first choice of what to put on. And in fact, when Disney in the 90s decided to do a rock-themed roller coaster, Aerosmith was not their first choice. Was not their first choice, which I just learned about. And it's crazy. Yeah. Can you guess?

Does anybody know? As you might guess, the Rolling Stones were the first band approached. And I believe they actually were approached. This is some Jim Hill info. I believe they wanted uh seven to ten million dollars a year in licensing that's a year in licensing disney every year that corporation would have to pay the rolling stones 10 million dollars out of pocket that's wild is that where and i think i don't think it is worth i don't think people are going i don't think anybody's

going to the park because there's a Rolling Stones ride. Well, also then that means that Aerosmith came in at a much lower rate, a much more reasonable rate. Yeah. 10% is what Hill claims. 10% of that amount? Of one million split. How many of them? Five?

Six? Four? Depends on who's a... Oh, wait. Of Aerosmith? Of Aerosmith. There are five. There's five Aerosmith members.

Can anybody name them? I can name all of them, I believe. Do we want me to do it? Sure. Steven Tyler, Joe Perry, Brad Whit all of them, I believe. Do we want me to do it? Sure. Steven Tyler, Joe Perry, Brad Whitford. Not Bradley Whitford. Brad Whitford. Joey Kramer and Tom Hamilton.

How about it? Wow. And I didn't even look that up before. I didn't look that up before. I just knew that. That is weird that it has not been nobody's changed out. There's a lot of personnel changes in bands of this level. But they're all there

they want those checks uh they don't want the checks going to some guy who looks like them that is impressive though and and i what i think i also think it's funny that these these names that are sort of obscure to some people tom hamilton or whatever these the amount of acting and performing these people have had to do and have to do in the ride this is a ride that uh thousands and thousands of people experience every day in which you watch tom hamilton recite dialogue it's kind of fun 20 years um so rolling stones say no are they disney's not willing to pay that amount of money aerosmith says yes this is a question i had for you guys um if aerosmith says no what do you think what do you think Disney's list was? Well, they're obviously going for baby boomers.

They're obviously going for dad. And Timelessness, a band that might keep going for another decade or so. It's lasted a while. Yeah, you got to have something. Yeah, Jason? Well, I wish, you know, one fact about this ride that I feel like is often thrown about, and God knows how far this even was along the pipeline in terms of actually happening, was that there was going to be a West Coast version for DCA.

Really? With No Doubt as the band. I've never heard that. The Rockin' Roller Coaster. Yes, I've already read that. But that was a few years later, too. A few years later too a few years later but

I don't think they would have gone no doubt in 1997 no I don't think they would yeah but I think that would have been that would have been

something else that's kind of a nice way to tribute yeah the band clearly Disneyland fans yeah in Orange County

being Dredge of Kingdom Gwen Stefani went to Studio K as we learned at Knott's Berry Farm but the Disneyland fans. Yeah, in Orange County. Being Dredge of Kingdom. Gwen Stefani went to Studio K, as we learned at Knott's Berry Farm. I think Aerosmith says no. I don't know who says yes. It's hard to think about a band that has been around that long and has some

staying power. And yeah, in the 90s had a bunch more hits. It's pretty rare. you gotta give it to them yeah we're uh we're being snarky about it but yeah no the longevity is uh pretty impressive i yeah there's no one i mean who else was in the who had a hit who it's in the like hits in the 70s and then had hits in the 90s well tom petty yes that's true and tom petty will not he would not have done this. Yeah, maybe not.

But he'll do... You see him on The Simpsons or something. Yeah, but he thinks that's cool. He's a comedy guy. He likes Gary Shamblin. Gary Shamblin. He was on those shows. It could have been like...

What is... The Diddy song, Come With Me? Jimmy Page. Yeah, Jimmy. Oh, man. If it had been a Jimmy Page and Puff Daddy, Come With Me ride. Oh, okay. That's something.

Oh, man. That would have been wild. That timing just about works out, I feel like. 90s? Late 90s? Avoiding 98 specific Godzilla. Right. Yeah, no Godzilla.

Just like, hey, we're here. We're just recording another new version of Come With Me. Or just another yeah it's it's it's become with me too and it's a different led zeppelin song with uh rapping over i do like to circle back to petty i do like the idea of call it like running down a dream sure where you're in the car and you're you do a quick launch to that yeah that i mean yeah that's probably the only appropriate so american girl probably it ends with but yeah we're getting sued now that's uh me just

doing that approximation now i'm on the sam smith list i did the sweet emotion earlier i i and whatever record company that doesn't know that they own helix uh if they find out oh yeah yeah we're fucked yep i guess who, who would have been a bad, because you can't go like to, another question you would have to consider is who would play ball with Disney? Mm-hmm. Like who would?

Aerosmith was all about playing ball in the 90s. All about playing. They loved playing ball. It worked out very well for them. But like the bare naked ladies would have been a little too silly. They were too fresh, though. They were too fresh.

Pretty fresh. They hadn't been around a long time but the chickity china the chinese chicken walk around in the character in the in the parks that would have been great that would have aged wonderfully uh pearl jam smashing pumpkins early 90s bands that sort of seemed like they might have been around a while another another issue you have with with picking a band is uh you know edginess although you're right aerosmith has very edgy yeah and in fact really uh really bit them in the butt yes many years later yes the the choice of aerosmith i don't know i i think it it obviously had to be it had to be aerosmith aerosmith um so. So, I mean, what else do we know about this?

Should we talk about the plot of the ride? Yeah. The star. I mean, the other two famous actors in it. Sure. Yeah, you go into a recording studio, essentially, or a record headquarters, but it's got a recording studio in it. It's called, do you have it written down with the recording studio? G-Force. It's called G-Force. And then it's called Tour de studio in it. It's called, do you have it written down with the recording studio? G-Force Records.

And then it's called Tour de Force in France, I believe. But then there's also, that said, once you get inside the building, there are posters for Hollywood Records bands. Yes. I remember that because I remember going like, oh, Hollywood Records, that's a good fake name for a record label to have in this

movie themed park nope that's this is actual record label hollywood records sort of was one of them um yeah they have in france they have like john and yoko up in different like pieces of memorabilia so it's not all in france they have uh vanessa paradis oh french singer with basically uh no awareness in America. So it's a totally Euro-ified experience at Tour de Force Records. They still, look, they have some American, but it's not total. It's not totally just specific to the land. So you go to a recording studio.

Because Aerosmith is, are you there to see them finish a record? It's unclear. So this is always a thing that even confused me in 1998 you go in and they're recording walk this way it doesn't make any sense they've already recorded two versions famously of walk this way and they're hissed in their life the run dmc version and the original but they had probably had to do it again within sync they might i guess that's a good point maybe they are constantly re-recording probably for swiffer commercials and stuff just like devo swift this way swift this uh yeah so you go in there they're in the middle of recording uh ken marino from the state and many other things is the

engineer he has no lines yes this is a i imagine something that uh nobody took note of when it was uh yeah they're recording a song he's manning a mixing board um and probably nobody noticed it or thought about at the time that's just an engineer but years down the line he's much more famous and popular from a lot of shows and stuff and it's a strange distracting fact that he is uh that it's Ken Marino, and you think, was he there to add a comedic value or punchline? No, he says nothing. He sits there silently. This is being,

there's a technology being deployed similar to hologram technology, similar to what you see today at, oh, I don't know, the Hologram USA Theater on Hollywood Boulevard. Oh, there it is. You're in a recording studio and there's the glass that separates the booth from where the recording takes place. And Aerosmith and Ken Marino and their manager, Ileana Douglas, are on the other side of the glass.

But it's done in this projected way where it sort of looks like they're there. It's a little bit of a photo reel kind of shooting. Yeah. And to do this, they had to shoot with unbelievably bright lights. The exposure had to be crazy high. And I found Ken Marina talking about it on the Nerdist podcast, and he apparently had to wear special contact lenses. Wow.

So that he would not go blind during the all-day shooting staring it uh i can only assume the other people it was the same deal unless you know steven tyler's brains already too fried just toss that in there man we'll do that to you my man uh that uh that effect is used i believe it's similar in gringa in the the queue line at Gringotts where you go into one of the banker's offices. You go into one of the many Weasley Brothers' offices. It's kind of hologram-y. It's kind of on the other ride, too, on Forbidden Journey, too, when you see the kids and the cloak of invisibility. It's sort of a similar thing.

It kind of looks like they're there. Now the film looks a little old. It looks a little old. Yeah, it still looks pretty good. I was there six months ago. Holds up, cool. So you're there to see a recording session, but then Ileana Douglas, their manager,

comes in and says, you gotta leave right now. You got a concert to get to. And they initially accede to this demand. They leave and go back into a very CG limo in the back of the room out the door of the recording studio, which leads straight out to the street, obviously. They start getting in the limo.

And then pretty late, after lot of like after 10 seconds of just milling around and joe perry asking for his blacklist paul yo chris can i get my blacklist paul then uh it occurs to steven tyler wait a minute what about these people we're just gonna leave them here they're not gonna come to the concert with us yeah and he because he says he's they love their fans you know how we feel about our fans how we feel about our famously love their fans um and yeah so they also kind of lightly harass iliana douglas it's like kind of a like they're all sort of you get the set like if cameras weren't rolling like they'd hit her on the butt or something or they probably did during the taping of this and they just couldn't put it digitally edited that digitally edited out uh

yeah they say like they're really all she does is come in and very gently ask like hey you guys gotta go maintain the schedule that i set up for you and they're like oh yeah fuck you oh yeah she's always like this yeah they do say that she's always like this you all know how eliana douglas can be she's incredibly apologetic she's very nice helps all the fans. Immediately, yeah, come on. What are we going to do? We got to give them, like, we should give these people backstage passes.

She does. Yeah. Immediately. She's a very kind character. Gets a super stretch limo. Gets a super fast car. Yeah. Super stretch limo. For everybody in that waiting room.

For everyone in the waiting room. Here's an issue I have with this. Concerts typically don't start until the band is there and uh bands of this caliber kind of don't give a shit if they're running late right well you know that you know it depends it depends jason what venue we're talking because there are curfews at certain places and you do get a large oh i guess you're right. If you're playing past, say, 11 o'clock at the Hollywood Bowl or 1030 maybe on a weeknight. So if you're close enough to residential areas.

Right. So, you know, Mr. Steven Tyler, even though he doesn't want to play by the rules, still doesn't want to pay a large fine at some sort of an outdoor venue, depending on where we are actually in the narrative of this ride, which I don't think they explain. There's rules, and then there's city ordinances that are in place for the good of our communities and fellow citizens, and we need to be good neighbors. Right, and no one appreciates city ordinances more than Jason Sheridan. Oh, I love it.

I love those ordinances. You go to the Burbank Town Center to just discuss the ordinances with the different council members every weekend. Yeah, which is a mall, so I bother them at the mall. The town square. just discuss the ordinances with the different council members uh every weekend yeah the which is a mall so i i bother them at the mall the town square and time with their families uh well as an aspiring mayor yourself that's true hashtag it's true what was it jason for dlr of course yes i believe keep using it in addition to the many others that we've thrown your way. The thing with our hashtag is they're great because they're cumbersome. Yes, that is what is great about them.

Well, we know no one has used them before, so that's a good thing. That's true, yeah. Yeah, we're still flying blind on if these have been used at all. We do know where the concert takes place. It is at the Forum. They name-checked the Forum. Oh, right, right, right, right. Which is a great venue in Los Angeles that has now been converted

to only be for concerts. It used to be sort of a shared space with sports, but there's no teams there now. So we know where they're playing. We know where they're going. And you know what? It takes a lot of freeway driving to get there. Those wild LA freeways. And that's what you have to navigate on this ride.

Well, wait. Where was the... Man. Now do I want to know. I don't think I realized they were going to the forum. But now I want to know where the recording studio was. Across town. Santa Monica.

Yeah. I don't know. Sound City in the Valley. It's Sound City. It's the girl's Sound City. That makes the most sense to take freeway. I guess if you hop on the 10... Well, they go on the five.

I think there's a five sign on the ride. All right. Oh, maybe they were recording right here in Burbank. That's possible. One of those quiet, one of those little unmarked recordings. Sure. There's tons of little studios and sound stages purposefully nondescript in the valley so that people don't come hunting around for stars and celebs trying to get uh limo passes and what have you yeah trying to get limo passes or in some case like

accidentally stumbling onto porto sets like that's probably another that's a different kind of unmarked for a reason the uh so there's an alternate story in France. Yeah. Yeah. Scott, you told me not to read about the France squad because you wanted to share some of the France stuff. Look, I didn't want to be strict about this, but because it was a surprise to me when I found out about it, when I went to Walt Disney Studios Paris, the worst Disney theme park by leaps and bounds, I did not go on this ride and continuing with my if you're surprised you've never been on the rock i have not been on oh my

goodness yeah yeah yeah but hey look we aren't talking about g's and inversions and whatever we're talking about the plot and i can consume the plot via YouTube videos just as well as anybody. Anyway, I waited while my wife did it. And, you know, I probably went to some other nonsense to the show where, you know, Martin Short takes you through the history of silent film and deals with a wizard played by Alan Cumming. And I was doing some other nonsense. If I may ask, though, because the difference between this and Space Mountain is probably just it goes faster. Is that why you don't want to go on it?

It's the quick launch. I have a problem with these quick launches. I should get over this. This would open up to me if I were willing to do these things. Well, I mean, the logistics of this... Well, sorry, sorry. What is the plot in France?

I want to know from either of you uh okay so because aaron went on it i asked her how it was she was like fine uh and i i said uh yeah was it that weird thing where you're like we're late for the concert we got to get you there and ken marino's there and uh can we get backstage passes for everybody and she was like no i said no what do you mean were you just not uh was the right was the show down no no no it's in a it's it's still them they're there there's a recording guy there um but instead they tell you that you okay you're you're in you're still it's a different record company. It's not G-Force Records. It's Tour de Force Records.

And you're there in a recording studio, mind you, to experience a new music and ride experience that Aerosmith has crafted for you. And it's still Ken Marino, still a recording booth, but they have like a model of a roller coaster. Steve Tyler's designing it. Well, at first, it's all of the members besides Steven Tyler. And they're kind of murmuring about, where's Steven?

Oh, he's on a ride. And then Steven comes in all hot and bothered, excited because of how many Gs he was experiencing. Because he can't do heroin anymore, and this is the only way he can get Gs. This is the only high he was experiencing. There's a part. Because he can't do heroin anymore. And this is the only way he can get G's. This is the only high he has available. He's describing very eloquently the specific feelings. I was feeling two G's, three G's, four G's.

And then, you know, suddenly it felt like I was. And he cues the sound going down from Love in an Elevator. Sacre bleu. works great with the french he says going down and then ken marino is like ah i see and writes that down as a note i don't know what he was meant to take from that so ken marino gets to do more he gets more business to do in the french version he he writes a note on a clipboard if that counts as more business but otherwise still no dialogue still doesn't talk on the nerdist he said he had lines that they recorded for the european one and he didn't know if they were they were there

but they they he did not they didn't make a shot on the same day presumably because it's the same super bright lighting everybody's in the same clothes so for some reason they felt and the other one the paris one didn't open till like five years later right but they thought ahead the plot needs to be different and the plot needs to be instead of uh you're late for a concert the plot is aerosmith aerosmith built a new ride for you are you ready to go on it and which is so that's as far as you know when you're watching watching the video, that's what the plot is. But then I've seen other things saying that the plot of the ride is that you're in an Aerosmith music video. And that's when you're going through loops and concert lighting. And that's you being in a music video.

And still another source I saw said that the point of the France one is that you, your car is a note. You're a musical note. Oh, and you're going through all of the vibrations and twists and turns that a Joe Perry guitar note goes through when traveling through the acoustics of an amphitheater. So the point is nobody knows what the plot of this ride is. That is the sort of whimsy I would expect from a country where Jerry Lewis is a national hero.

Yes. The kind of creativity. In fact, there's like, let me just read from the Disney Paris website. Get ready to rock out in an Aerosmith music video. The bad boys from Boston are working with engineers on a revolutionary new sound, and they want you to be center,

spelled the European way, stage. So jump into a sound tracker with onboard speakers and turn the amp to the max. Every electrifying riff is met with more G-force than an astronaut experience. Not pluralized.

Maybe proofread your site, Disney Paris. Blasting you through lightning rigs. What? What's a lightning rig? Lightning rigs. It's everything you a lightning rig? Lightning rigs. It's everything you'd expect from the amped up neon lit smoke filled excess of a rock and roll lifestyle. Wow.

Famously. Should that be lighting rigs? I think so. It's a play on that. It's like they have a new version of a lighting rig called lightning rig. Okay. I've given them a lot of unless it is. It's possible it's just an error.

Possibly just a misspelling. So, and that's another thing that in the Paris, I'm sorry, in the Orlando one, I've given him a lot of credit. It's possible it's just an error. Possibly just a misspelling. That's another thing that in the Orlando one, you get in a limousine. In the Paris one, you get on a sound tracker, which looks like a limousine, except the front of the car has a CD embedded in it. Oh, boy.

There's also a giant CD outside, right? There's a giant CD outside. That's another thing I'd like to say, comparing the two versions, that Courtyard in Orlando is kind of nice. Big classic guitar with a roller coaster track coming out of the neck. It looks like it was always supposed to be. It fits right in with the better end of the architecture of Disney MGM Studios.

Such a nice area that a Britney Spears concert for the Disney Channel was held there. I have very fond feelings about this giant guitar courtyard. However, the Paris one is like the worst graphic design you've ever seen. I consider this an international crime. Just to bring it up i saw you guys really doubling down on the cds there's cds everywhere um these are never going away yeah yeah yeah this will be the tech now well how would you what would you do now would it be songs are invisible now they're on a cloud just ones and two ones and. There's no way to represent. So, and then, like, it's a font.

Like, this logo. It's very busy. It's the busiest thing. It's a leopard print guitar. There's roller coaster tracks exploding out of it. The font is on fire. It's a truly hideous. It's green, but there's so many colors,

and they kind of go together, but they kind of don't. It's very strange. There are like 25 colors all fighting each other. It's also not covering the soundstage that it's in. Like you can see the corner of the soundstage in this picture. Yes, and this is the thing with Disney Studios Paris is it's all just cheap metal buildings and there's this corner of the park that is, it really is just Aerosmith Alley and they should call

it that. I wish they called it that. Aerosmith Alley. Getting yourself into. This is where Steven Tyler's parents were gunned down in front of him after That's the origin of Aerosmith. That's the origin of Aerosmith. I must fight back with Rock. I must fight my feelings.

We were leaving a Robert Johnson concert. With the strains still echoing. Bullets were added to the soundtrack. So the Rock and Roller Coaster is next in a very cheap building. It's next to another very cheap building with this unpleasant Armageddon experience. Which really is perfect. Because Armageddon, don't want't want to miss it i don't want to miss a thing and the song is playing outside of that wow so aerosmith just owns a couple acres in france that's crazy outside of paris um but this you just you you get a headache from every component of this area of disney studios paris like the the the songs i will say i think are

unpleasant the graphics are unpleasant it's all like the the the buildings are nothing to look at you're lucky if they slapped a poster up there this is a i want them to fire bomb this zone this is a this is an atrocious area of a disney park. That's too bad. I'll say this about the France version. They play Jaded on the ride. And not here? And not in Florida. Jaded is nowhere to be found in Florida. Maybe outside.

It might be played outside in that area, but on the actual ride or inside the ride, Jaded is not played, which, of course, we've both determined is the best aerosmith song best aerosmith song let there be no debate although maybe i think you got to give some points to the customized version of love in an elevator yes love in a roller coaster right great living it up while i'm going down pretty cool maybe that's later is like get i if my parents are listening which they are to stop listening it's just some like having like bone in an elevator like and so i guess but that's

crazy that they just changed it to roller coaster because that's sort of what still the same thing still the same thing yes it's like getting it on in a roller coaster and just more dangerous the fun of sex that has to be over in 15 seconds yeah the ride is like a minute 15 the ride is so short yeah like sex late sex always is for three podcasts i i have to say i this this ride uh this ride uh uh i do have like i have more associations with this ride and aerosmith than i do with Aerosmith alone. Because I remember going on this ride, probably, it probably would have been that opening summer.

I was probably there. I remember seeing it on the information channel and seeing it on the map and like going into the courtyard and liking the courtyard. And I, my very specific memory of it is asking multiple cast members does this ride go upside down because i didn't like i hadn't really done looping coasters besides maybe one at like a little seaside park in new jersey and for whatever reason i could not get a cast member to give me a straight answer and so we're like i guess we'll just try it and there's a very unpleasant outside

queue that's just like a few tv screens yes it is not not dressed up at all are they not really dressed up playing music videos what's on the screen they're playing music videos and you hear the aerosmith songs there's some songs i and then when you get inside and then you you go through the little pre-show area and then you come out of that and I kind of like the cue out of that that looks like the alleyway behind the recording studio with the chain link fences and stuff. But then as soon as you come out of it, you see people sitting in the cars

and the cars fucking launch. And I was like, not only will no one tell me if this goes upside down, I've never seen a roller coaster do that before. Because this would have been the same summer Islands of Adventure opened. So before this and the Hulk, I didn't even know about the concept of launch casters. And then my dad and I got in.

And yeah, that launch is like still to this day. And I've ridden a number of them. Still a very unnerving feeling. Sure. And I'm not willing to pass. I love it. I love the launch. I don't know it gets i've said this before it gets the whole thing over with my whole thing with roller coasters is i don't like

that slow up i don't like the dangling i don't like feeling like you're gonna fall i like momentum on it so this is similar to to what you're saying i was very scared when i went for the first time and i remember my mom asked the question you're asking to a lot of employees of like does it go upside down is it she was like I mean I think she was like late 30s yeah 40 at that point and she was like worried and they're like you'll be fine don't worry yeah and now I feel like if you ask a cast member that immediately they'll tell you yes yes it does yeah yeah once or twice I think they said yeah and it's but it's twice I don't know I hadn't been upside down because the only thing I'd ever been on that was anything close to being a roller coaster was Space Mountain.

And Space Mountain is still pretty tame. I mean, it was the one in Florida. I had not been to the one out here. There's no strong element to it. There's not one thing in it that's more scary than just generally it being a roller coaster. Yeah, I find Space Mountain in Florida now a little scary because of how rickety it is. Yeah, they got to fix that track. Yeah, yeah.

But yeah, so I went, I think it's probably opening summer and I hadn't been yet. So Tower of Terror is there. And so I went on Tower of Terror and Rock and Roller Coaster for the first time on this one trip on this one day. And if you were to have stopped me at the end of the park, at the end of the day and say, how do you feel about Rock and Roll coaster i would and tower of terror i would have said

they are both the same level of great i was so happy with both these i may have even said rock and roller coaster was better at the time wow which in hindsight is crazy it was and it is cool that like launch because the launch kind of varies. I mean, reading about the ride each, I don't know. We don't have to say all of the, there are five cars and a six in rotation that can play any of them. And each car plays a different song or set of songs. And the launch is different for each one too. Sometimes it counts down to five, four, three, two, and then launches you.

And Steven Tyler is counting sometimes and then he leaves one out yeah and sometimes he says one though his rock and roll mischievous uh tomfoolery i see yeah but it is fun like i do like i know what you mean the first time i wrote it i thought it was great and i still like it i mean it's gone in the last few years and it's like yeah this is this is great i am not saying I still feel that it's the same goodness as Tower of Terror. But at the time. No. And also, like, it is something where I felt, like, alive. Oh, absolutely.

I was like, oh, I'll survive on a roller coaster. I'll be okay. This is very fun. It's a landmark day for you. A day I haven't had. Yes, I know. We would be honored to be with you on your first launch. Well, look.

Scott, you have one of those famous grapefruit-flavored drinks at the Brown Derby and a slice of their famous grapefruit cake. And then we'll take you down to... The Incredicoaster might be the place to start. I would do the Incredicoaster. Oh, the Incredicoaster. Yeah, you got to see that. Dynamo animatronic yes uh but see of the with the temptation of uh of a big yeah of a of a big

doll or whatever is in there i'll brave it to see that big doll uh i gotta say uh yeah so as a kid i i was uh uh this this end of the park i was like wow two two big attractions down there and now now looking at the current state of hollywood studios this end of the park is doing some heavy lifting this end of the park is carrying this park is so much is closed so much is under construction only end of the park basically i mean i keep forgetting the great movie ride is closed i'm like well yeah there's nothing there if the great movie ride was still open i would say that this would probably still be one of my family's favorite like parks to hit even though there's three rides i guess there's the indiana jones stunt

show and phantasmic show star tours uh phantmic, which I like because it's insane, and The Great Movie Ride, and then this and Tower of Terror. And then my family also really likes Mama Melrose. There's a wood-fired pizza Italian restaurant. I feel like most people are like, oh, we like the sci-fi diet in it, or we like the moms, the 50s. The gimmick places. The gimmick places. The gimmick places.

But then there's an actual decent restaurant in there too. I remember that being okay. And oddly enough, I've never eaten at the Brown Derby. Oh, we ate once. That's pretty good. I did as a kid. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not bad.

So there's still a lot I like in this park. But you know what? We will get tweets or requests for general disney world travel advice and i'd have to say for the next six months or so the advice would be skip hollywood studio do well do a four out do get rock and roller coaster hit tower at the very least yeah tower but people who are if you're trying to save a couple bucks let's be conscious of well but you gotta get the park hopper option you know i say you you do those you do a lunch at mama melrose hit up star tours and then another lunch at mama melrose yeah then another lunch at mama melrose and i mean i love that indiana jones stunt show too um i'm wrong well i don't know my advice no your advice is pretty similar

I think we just like this park a lot I think Tower of all I'm saying is Tower of Terror is worth it especially now that we don't have any

version of it I mean we have a version of it but not a version of Twilight Zone version this is certainly true but I'm

presenting the world in which people do not go to Disney World for nine days that's true you aren't doing the indulgence I don't understand

that there are those people I don't understand that. There are those people. I don't know why they're listening to this, but there are those people. You can take a boat from Hollywood Studios to Epcot. It's a quick thing. So say you're doing a full Epcot day. You go at 8 o'clock in the morning or 9 o'clock in the morning. You do an hour. You do

Rock and Roller Coaster Tower. You take the boat to Epcot. That's not much of out of the day. I don't want to nitpick, but I don't know that you're right. Is that a boat? Well, there's a much of out of the day. I don't want to nitpick, but I don't know that you're right. Is that a boat? I don't. Well, there's a boat, but I think you have to go to one of the hotels and then go to Epcot. You can walk from here to Epcot.

This is the bigger thing. I don't know that there's a direct friendship boat from Hollywood Studios to Epcot, Michael. I'm looking this up now. No, I'm really upset. Will our relationships ever met? You know what I'm looking this up now. Now I'm really upset. Will our relationships ever met? You know what I say? Skip this park. Just put on your headphones. Download the song Jaded. Get in

a revolving chair and spin around. And then that's like you were on the ride. The end. And I don't know. Ask the hotel you're in to cut the elevator cord or an emergency level. Well, I'll tell you this. I think this park's gonna look pretty neat when you take the skyliner into this i think this park's gonna look pretty neat when you take the skyliner into it oh there's gonna be a big one for now if you're listening to this in

2019 post galaxy's edge now we've it's a crown jewel of a park i would have to hope i could care less about galaxy says i'm just excited for a new mode of transit to get around disney world which is this is a sort of a gondola thingola thing. You have to stop at one of the hotels and then you go to Hollywood Studios. That's that crazy from the thing that I said. No, but great hotel. That boat, you can go to the boardwalk, Beecher Yacht Club,

Swan or Dolphin, a lot of fun stuff. Again, also you can walk between this park and Epcot, which is a little bit of a hike, but it's a beautiful walk. That is the thing. My genuine advice is, like, at some point in your Disney World travels, like, take a day to just wander around hotel lobbies and stuff.

Oh, I mean, yeah, if you're into it for the theming, the hotels are a treat. Yeah, if you go for that fast roller coaster bullshit, then fine. But if you want themes, if you want accurate Cape Cod architecture, then do it Scott's way. If you want to see what carpeting

would have been put into a hotel in 1997, go and see all of the Disney World hotels. A strike against this, according to some people, I don't know that I completely agree, but the Rock and Roller Coaster is what they call an off-the-shelf coaster. It is not a Disney-specific design by Imagineering. They just basically look at a roller coaster catalog, and they pointed and said, I want this. They designed everything that's around it. In the case of Orlando, they put up the five freeway sign,

and you probably go through like a Hollywood sign O or something, I'd imagine. Yes, you sure do. You absolutely do. Okay, great. Good guess. But that's, of course, to simulate some sort of out-of-control drunk drive that Steven Tyler had while he drove a car through the Hollywood sign down the hill. It's a real story for him.

We shouldn't be enjoying it. I've got to get to the Bob's Big Boy in Burbank. I'mbank i'm going over the hill he went the other way you're saying he's going up he's driving up the hill and then he went the other he went reverse and he's like well i'm gonna go home time to go back the way i came and in the at the end of the ride you crash into bb buell's house yeah i'm here to see my daughter and elvis costello is there with another gentleman caller um can i oh can i point out also the uh you said that it's different experiences based on which limo you get in uh or sound caster in paris but you you know you can uh you know which song it's going to be off of the license plate numbers which in rock and roll style have attitude the license plate

numbers include you go babe buh-bye h8 hates traffic and too fast for you which is correct in my case it is too fast for me thanks for letting me know ride yeah um but so that's a fun that's a fun little easter egg i also hear there's a lot of uh hidden mickeys on this ride but i don't yeah i think i care do i was gonna i think we haven't talked about this yet do you guys care about hidden mickeys we've done a lot of episodes and not talked about them i think like if i can if i spot one i'm like oh that's fun uh that's about my my extent yeah i feel like a lot of them are lame i feel like sometimes they they're like cool like sometimes there's one i think there's supposedly one in the queue for the little mermaid ride in florida where it's only when the sun it's in the rock work in the queue

and when the sun hits a certain point in the sky in the day, it casts a shadow of a hidden Mickey. Yeah, that's cool. I like that. And the MGM Studios has a giant, you're in a giant hidden Mickey with the mouth being the courtyard

of the MGM, of the Great Movie ride and then like the eyes are the lake and something else or the courtyard of the MGM, of the Great Movie Ride. And then the eyes are the lake and something else or the ears of the lake. You ever seen this? If you go to Google Maps and look down on Hollywood Studios, it's the biggest Hidden Mickey. My favorite part of the Hidden Mickey, the map. All right, okay, calm down.

No, it's a joke because it's just traditionally three circles. You don't really see about that. Okay, sure. No, it's a joke because it's just traditionally three circles. You don't really see about that. Okay. No, you have some kind of giant fetish and you want to get swallowed by Mickey. Oh, I do want to get swallowed by Mickey. You wanted to get eaten on Alien Encounter. You want to roll around in Mickey Mouse's mouth. Yeah.

He can spit you out. It's up to him what happens. But I also, I'd like to say, I think a pretty good pull quote if we needed like a catchphrase that explains this podcast to people who haven't heard it i think sometimes hidden mickeys are cool is pretty because that conveys both that we think that but sometimes we're a little picky about our mickeys sometimes it's lame uh so yeah let that be a defining quote forever um two two videos i watched this ride one uh like space mountain there is footage of this ride with the lights on

and it is uh like space mountain terrifying maybe even more so because of the like metal work on this is so like intense uh the track is just very gruesome looking just very like industrial steel and then it's also just built in an unthemed downstage so there's just girders everywhere it feels like you're like you've been uh space mountain with lights on or rock and roller coaster with lights on it feels like you're in like an industrial like a kill floor or something like it's a place you've been brought in to be slaughtered and cut into bits you are you are like charlie chaplin falling into the machines in modern times uh scariest movie i've ever seen scariest movie uh there was a one night star wars overlay of this attraction yes where you were i mean they didn't take any of the blacklight signs down, but you were racing to get to the premiere of Star Wars The Force Awakens.

That's how they justified it? That's the way I figured it, the way it said premiere at the end. You're like, well, we got you here in the premiere. And I'm like, oh, okay, I guess you're racing. Yeah, that would start without you. You know, talking uh overlays and musical overlays that were briefly around um the success of having a roller coaster sets to rock music kicked open the door to the uh the uh rockin space mountain and rockin california screaming

that were open for a summer at disneyland in which the two primary roller coasters at the Disneyland Resort were taken over by those Rapscallions, the Red Hot Chili Peppers. And I got to experience both of these. This is my first summer at Disney. Really? At Disneyland, the first time I had ever been to these parks. And I got to experience California Screamin' and Space Mountain in the best possible

way soundtracked by the red hot chili peppers a band i mean how do we all feel about the red chili peppers i think it's similar it's one of those it's fine they're spotty they can be around they don't bother me flea is a fantastic never had an album back to the future too i have had i have a few of their albums uh i do think that aerosmith and red hot chili peppers are very similar in a lot of ways in the way you're saying that but they have a very like rap rocky they're very bawdy there's like a lot of dirty stuff in it i was very into californication when it came out the song i like the music video having sex in california what The song you said.

No, isn't the album... You said, I'm very into Californication. The song. Well, isn't the album also... Yeah, it's... I meant the song. I didn't have the album. But I like the song. I like the music video.

I miss the joke, whatever joke you were going for. He was saying you're open to uh to the act of californication yeah having uh doing uh sexual things in california i'm just i'm not gonna lie uh i didn't know about the i didn't pick up on that word play until just now really we taught you just thought it was like a like a process like being in a california machine i yeah i honestly did think it's just like yeah these fuckers love california uh i also too mostly think of that music video where it becomes a video game for a little bit that he's like hopping through is that right uh is it is that california occasion is that the video i can't remember there's a lot of there's a lot of uh hits on that album there's other side there's scar tissue there's around the world california on that no

jason please i don't know california is on stadia stadium arcadium oh i mean we do our research no more three stars uh but i just but you had not done your research about i had not done fornication was oh man dirty stuff it's all dirty stuff i'm glad i uh punched up and reused that uh late bloomer joke for this episode. Because we really... We really illustrated it. I was so shocked that you were like, what are you talking about? And then it all comes out. We taught you a classic pun today.

Oh, that classic pun. Californication. It's a pun is what it is. It is, yes. Californication. It's like up there with the Mark Twain Zingers from the American Adventure Anthony Kiedis and Mark Twain America's greatest wordsmiths

That's what they're going to update it to Oh shaking hands Like at the end of American Adventure Oh I'm fine with that Throw Benjamin Franklin off the torch It's Kiedis baby Well You know talking about the body nature of rock bands,

which is what we're doing, we should say, you know, this ride was just having a pleasant, it was just chugging along. The train kept a rolling, as Steven Tyler would say, without incident. But I guess after many years of murmuring, people noticed that Steven Tyler in this pre-show with Ileana Douglas and Ken Marino, uh, at one point peers out into the audience as if to see us,

the guests and, and refer to us and say, but I love my fans. They have to come with me. Uh, and he makes a hand gesture in doing so known as the shocker. He holds, which is he's holding up,

not even, hey, somebody's gonna have to explain to me how to make it. It's two fingers and then one is down and then one is up. There's a,

I will not, I will not say the thing that the kids in high school when they taught me this would say about it. You can look it up. It's a dirty thing. Yes.

It's an equation. You know the recipe for a shocker. It's cool and funny to do. It's cool and funny, but I... It still holds up. It ages well.

Even though we have an explicit podcast, I won't be that explicit. We're not yet. You haven't bloomed that far yet. No. What's odd is that

they left in Joe Perry doing that thing where you put your hand under your chin and you drag it. Sort of like the Godfather. Fuck you. Like the Italian fuck you. Joe Perry does that like the entire time he's on screen. Yeah, they're fine with that. But yeah, they digitally took it out.

In 2016, very recently, some Disney graphic designer, somebody was sent this footage, and they had to digitally add a finger to Steven Tyler's hand to make it a regular palm up and not a lewd gesture. So now it's just, hello. Yeah. Open hand on a forehead. See us.

In practicality, when filming it, it was probably blocking his the very bright lights from his eyes um while doing a lewd gesture but yeah steve so do you did you see what steven tyler wrote on facebook after this went down no steven tyler on his facebook uh in all caps wrote way to give me the finger now w Disney World dot dot dot 17 years later and then he just wrote the greatest ride at Disney so is that footage of him getting off like walking exiting the ride like years later and and him go and I feel like at one point he says like just checking in on my ride like and then everyone went pictures taking pictures high-fiving people

he i think that he was real psyched about i think he's psyched about it because he went on i think it was like a 68th birthday he was down there he went on it i think he's happy to be on a ride i don't think he thinks it's lame i swear to god if i am 68 and i don't have a ride to check in on uh just pulled me off uh whatever support yeah yeah i will i'll do something i'll purposefully fall down the stairs and then please i'll tell you guys my co-hosts i'm giving you permission to pull me off the dialysis machine if i don't have a ride yet what another name i have to write down giving me the end of life another person I had to pull the plug on. Will you be okay if we're just still performing in Halix at Star Wars Galaxy's Edge?

Oh, that counts. That's fine. Great. The opening ceremony, Aerosmith showed up. I believe they played. Yeah, and contest winners got to go and enjoy a buffet meal and drinks with them. That's true. I was going to mention the buffet

if you were not going to mention it yourself. I'm glad you took note of it. But then you got to ride with one of, you got a chance to ride with one of the members of the band in your car, which is a foolhardy thing to do after enjoying a buffet. I ate a bunch of macaroni pasta

that looked like guitars. And then me and Brad Whitford, not the actor, the Aerosmith Brad Whitford, got to ride in H8 traffic to the tune of Jaded. It was the greatest day of my life. It was France. Oh, if it was Orlando. Okay, okay, yes.

They also, at the opening ceremony, they were joined by Denny Dent, the speed painter. Oh, yeah. Who speed painted. No need to say his credit. all know denny dent speed painted uh the big pick all five aerosmith members what really yeah he's like he's one of those guys just throws paint at a camera or was he has passed away apparently and then those uh canvases hang throughout like uh employee offices in walt disney world apparently yeah that is weird like why didn't they just put them on the ride? Oh, good question.

Is that you? Is that your father? No, it's Tom Hamilton. Who did it? Denny Dent. They were all fighting for Steven Tyler or Joe Perry. Well, you know that's in Iger's office. You know the big dog got that one.

Oh, yeah. They do famously call Bob Iger the big dog. Yeah, yeah. That's Disney lore you should know. He's like WWE star Roman Reigns. Bob Iger. Yeah, explosions go off when he enters that building with the dwarfs on it. It's similar to how Pitbull is named Mr. Worldwide.

That's his nickname. And I am also nicknamed Mr. Worldwide. That's true. Not Mr. Californication, though. We know that. No, clearly not. Interesting actual fact about this ride. It is apparently the second fastest ride

in Walt Disney World. Test track supposedly goes faster. Really? Oh, interesting. And I can do that, but their launch doesn't go uphill. I guess that's where... I don't want to leave my heart and lungs

at the bottom of the ride and then shoot up that ramp. You don't want to go 0 to 57 in 2.8 seconds. I guess I don't. I guess I don't want to live the rock and roll lifestyle. That's what it's like at all times when you're a rock star. That's true.

Well, I should do it. Hey, next time I'm there, I don't know. I mean, who knows how long it'll be there. Let's be honest. Yeah, the Paris one is being turned into a Marvel attraction. Iron Man. Oh, right. That's why we're talking about it.

To farewell. How do you say goodbye in French? There's been a au revoir. I didn't know that. You didn't know Californication. I didn't know that you didn't know californication I didn't know au revoir

even though I was in France I took two years of French that's about all you remember I bet yep Iron Man will tell you

to get in the what are they called in France not sound snappers what are they sound casters

yeah sound cast quick get in the sound caster the Avengers need your help I'm building a ride the Avengers are building a ride and you have to go on it and test it out Soundcasters. Yeah, Soundcast. Quick, get into Soundcaster. The Avengers need your help. I'm building a ride. The Avengers are building a ride, and you have to go on it and test it out.

Okay, the Gs are almost complete, okay? We're here at Stark Industry Studios. We're in Studio B. I'm cutting my new record, and we're finishing a roller coaster demo. If the narrative is that Tony Stark is cutting a demo, that's great. It's not. Tie it all together with producer Steven Tyler. He's sitting back there.

He now has taken the Ken Marino seat. That's, yeah. Sounds good, Tony. I would love it if there was a gag in one of the Marvel movies where one of them released like a novelty single, like Disco Duck or the Super Bowl Shuffle. Sure, yeah. I guess you would need to introduce Wonder Man for that. Like his character, he was an actor. He was like a famous actor and a superhero and a musician.

In Thor Ragnarok, there's a pretty good runner that Jeff Goldblum's character plays weird synth and like makes up songs. So maybe he's that. Maybe he's, what is his character's name? It's not the collector. The collector is Benicio. Oh, God, what is his name? Which, by the way, okay, in Los Angeles,

you likely know that Jeff Goldblum does jazz piano shows. Yes. And so he's more than willing to... He'll always take a concert venue. Let's get him down in the cantina as well. Oh, great. I'll give... In character, in Thor character,

it can't just be the jazz piano. It's got to be a synth component. You got to bring it into the future, but... I think he'd love to do that. I don't think that would be hard to book. I really don't. No, I don't think so. I think Jeff Goldblum would be thrilled

to perform at Disneyland every once in a while with a... Does he have, like, I don't know I think Jeff Goldblum would be thrilled to perform at Disneyland every once in a while. Does he have space hair? Does he have a blue goatee or some shit? And a big robe, a fun robe. Great. I guessed the wardrobe, so let's get him in character performing in that canteen. That's great. But mainly Halix. Only between Halix sets.

The Grandmaster. The Grandmaster, of course. He's the Grandmaster. He's great in that movie. That is a side note. That's like totally him. Like, I almost think that's the best use of just like him, his essence, like letting him just improvise. And it's odd and off-timed and they keep takes in it that are like no other movie would keep that taken of him just making a weird noise. Anyway, that's a side note. What do you think is the best use of Steven Tyler in a movie?

In a movie. Is it, let's take the ride out of the running, although he's great in it, because I don't know if you're aware of the full filmography, but he is in the film Be Cool, the sequel to Get Shorty. He is in Polar Express. He does a big musical number. He's like an elf.

He's an elf that is mocap uh amended to the features of steven tyler and he's also i swear to god i can't remember the name of this movie but it was on in a hotel room once and it's an animated movie where he's a big fat worm or something and you the only way you don't know who it is because his speaking voice is very generic he's just kind of a uh just kind of a raspy voice dude, and he acts very stiffly, but he's a mystical worm, and his name is Nim Galoo.

And there's this video I love where he says, I always dreamed of being in an animated film, and now my wish came true. I'm Nim Galoo. So I'm very fond of Nim Gal but i of the film i can't remember the name epic the movie is called oh wow yeah i never would have got there why why is him big worm movie he's a caterpillar oh okay and it is yeah oh god that movie i think i saw a little of that who made it was it ice age is a dreamworks no movie. Who made it? Was it Ice Age? Was it DreamWorks? No one knows who made it.

I already forgot the name. It's Nimgaloo the movie. It's called I Am Nimgaloo. I have not seen any of those things you've mentioned. I've never seen Be Cool. I've never seen Epic. Your head is better for it. If I'm giving the non-funny answer, I guess it's Wayne's World 2.

Oh, right. Of course. He is good in a film. He is good in Wayne's World 2. They're great in Wayne's World 2. And of course he is good in a film he is good in wayne's world 2 they're great in wayne's world and that's a good song too the song they play um uh yeah what shut up and dance yeah yeah that's fun uh yeah so so and american idol he was good he sure was he now he didn't factor into the american idol experience the very unpleasant disney world attraction did he no i don't think so so there wasn wasn't an Aerosmith Alley in Florida.

Joe Perry also very upset at Steven Tyler that he did American Idol to sell out like that. Oh, really? Pitbull is also in Epic. What? Yeah, how about that? Mr. Worldwide. There we go. There's also a great video of Pitbull playing beer pong with Jimmy Fallon outside of the

Simpsons ride while all the characters cheer him on Simpsons and Sideshow Bob included they put their uh famous rivalry aside to cheer Pitbull and Fallon look that's great um in intra company marketing that's great um synergy for NBC Universal that's great inter-network marketing between Fox and NBC. And it's just good fun for all of us fans. For everybody who loves beer pong. And Florida. There's rumors of what might replace this ride.

Is it going to be replaced in Orlando? Yes. There's been many different rumors over the years of different bands. There's also i think most recently uh rumor that they're gonna just put doors on it and it'll become a monster zinc coaster monster zinc i think has been like the most rumored to have new rides that never pan out there's gonna be a whole monster zinc door coaster that was gonna replace the monster zinc right out here in california, but that never happened. But it's got to be much tame. This is way too crazy.

I don't think it does. I don't think it does. This is way too intense to make it a Monsters, Inc. because then little kids want to go on it, and you do have to be of a certain height to ride this intense of a coaster. You've got to be a Twizzler. You've got to be a Twizzler.

You've got to be a Twizzler. Look, these kids have got to learn sometime. It's 48 inches to ride, so they're going to be, look, you're going to have to wait. 48 inches to ride another Aerosmith album. Jesus. They're always sneaking stuff in. They could do, yeah, the big 10 inch and they could say like the big 48 inch. They could change that song around.

And then there was also, and this is published on Screamscape, and a lot of people were goofing on it because it's probably not real, but supposedly one night they tested out the Powerline song. Oh. Eye to eye on the ride.

Supposedly. For the public. The public was, oh yeah, I remember they. This was a rumor people have said this is not true this was just somebody lying to screamscape a screamscape but as we know screamscape kind of a rag uh and they'll publish anything they don't give a shit no we love it uh no i i'm gonna stick hard to the mice name um uh so that would be my i i guess we're getting ahead of ourselves Of what we would do to it

But I like that idea That doesn't make any sense The song from Yeah why exactly I mean it's sort of a concert vibe And you're talking about the song from a goofy movie Which culminates in this new Jack Swing concert With this particularly good song

Which we've Yeah we've said is like the best Disney song of all time maybe Well so we thought Until Halix's Lightning, which I just played you. And you can see how Jailbait and the other one factor in. So, Powerline's moving down the charts. But yeah, it's up there. Still up there.

Top five. And then obviously Hakuna Matata. Yeah, number three. I'm going to mess with the classic. Number three with a bullet. Does I Don't Want to Miss a Thing count as a Disney song? No. Okay.

But wait, didn't I determine it's Mickey's favorite song? But Mickey can like songs that aren't in the Disney family, right? He can, but he chooses not to. Okay, fair enough. So it is a Disney song. So you want to put, you want to get that power line jammed. I like that. I have other ideas too.

But I mean, do we have anything else before we sort of tie everything up? Yes, I think they will redo it to a Mary Poppins coaster and Lin-Manuel Miranda will rap along to new songs about Mary Poppins. That sounds hellish um i think i just i want to keep what's there but you know let's capitalize on the talent involved now that we now that people are familiar with ken marino let's give him some lines let's make it a right what if there's a little more of a story and you're chasing this bumbling audio engineer uh around the freeways of los angeles yeah uh you're trying he well maybe he uh messed up the like uh he mixed joe perry's guitar over steven tyler's vocals

right which is verboten in an aerosmith record and now you're trying to track him down and punish him and ram him with your soundcaster. You don't. He makes it out alive. I like Ken Marino. I don't want to hurt the guy. But he's got like a cartoon like bandage and like a sling after the ride. Yeah, yeah.

He gets only as abused as Goofy would. But through the streets of Los Angeles, he like tumbles out the hole of the Randy's Donuts or, yeah, lots of L.A. themed injuries. I will say this. I think the France version might be better. I think the narrative is a little more interesting. Steven Tyler creating a ride is crazy and more fun than them just going to a concert. That is fun. And I'll also say, and this is free of irony or free of joking, is that I think the ride itself looks better.

I think that just the sort of generic lighting rigs on the France one with the lighting kind of looks cool. It looks like a concert. It looks how like concert lighting is. And it doesn't look, to be quite honest, as cheap as the one in Orlando because the one in Orlando sort of looks cheap. Once you're inside. Yes, once you you're inside the signs all look kind of cheap and like it looks like kind of like that kiss uh the kiss golf mini golf course in las vegas have you ever been there i love that i wish it were that quality yeah very similar to some of

the mummy uh blacklight paintings in florida, there's some cool effects in the mummy ride. This would have opened right around that time, too. But, yeah, some of the actual signs on that ride, a little just kind of blacklight paint. Erin went on it, though, and she said exactly this. She said it was like blacklight. She said it was like a youth group haunted house. Well, the video in Orlando, she went on the France one. No, she thought she found it video the video which in orlando

she went on the france one no she thought france was a little credit well from i'm all i can go off of is just a video so i think that the video i watched made it look a little less cheap i'm sure it's cheap because the same coaster they didn't do a ton of work on it uh but i like the narrative better i think though you like the narrative that you're either a note or you're in a video or steven tyler designed a ride for you i like that steven tyler designed a ride for you i think like you were saying we should update the the video aerosmith should still be involved but i think it should uh show like you know what's been happening more it shouldn't be 20 years old uh It should reference Steven Tyler's new solo album, Red, White, and You.

The country album he put out about a year ago. It should also, like, somebody should say, hey, Joe, how are the Hollywood vampires going? And he should talk about them for a minute or two. He should say what's happening. Maybe a cameo from Captain Jack Sparrow himself, Johnny Depp. He's the guy. Hey, Joe, we need you in the limo. Yeah, see, that's great.

That's what I'm talking about. The vampires. We got a gig. We have to go play our cover of Paint It Black for an audience of record executives who paid $600 a pop. Are you now in this new version trying to make it to a co-headliner Hollywood Vampires Aerosmith concert?

That's great, but Stephen probably would put in that he gets then to do also a solo set of just the country songs as well. Then you're getting your money's worth. It's a star-studded event. But you don't see this concert. You're on the way to this concert that doesn't exist. Hold on. I have a plus up as well.

Tell me more. Yes. I also think that they build the whole thing up that you're going to see a concert, and then that doesn't pay off. So that's a bummer, too, because there's video screens when you get off the ride in the gift shop that's showing the concert, and that sucks. I think you gut the gift shop that's showing the concert and that sucks i think you gut the gift shop you build the stage take some of the pirates off of pirates of the caribbean they already look like the members of aerosmith in a lot of ways their age their skin is is rough and and oily and uh their hair long and stringy and scary one of the mules is stephen tyler that's fine i don't think anyone

would notice just put a microphone with a scarf tied to it in front i think you you put those guys there at the stage much like that minions room where you get to dance with the minions after the minions ride oh yeah this is a better version of it you get a robot concert going for you it cycles through if you want to stay stay there forever and see their whole greatest hits, all the dirtiest songs, you sit there, you watch this robot concert. It's like the Chuck E. Cheese Band. I think that's a great idea. That's truly a fun ending to the Aerosmith ride.

Wayne and Garth appear at some point, say they aren't worthy, ask them to play at Wayne Stock. They resist but ultimately have a change of heart of course um then they leave then the robots all have to leave at the end because the limo pulls up to take them to wayne stock so you're tying together all of the things aero smith ever had to go to yeah that's perfect um or you could really tie it all together and at the end they are kidnapped by an evil group called the New Order Nation and their horrible leader Helga who are trying to enslave

all of the world's youth population by suppressing all forms of entertainment which is the plot of the video game Revolution X of course so if they get to perform for three hours then Ileana Douglas pulls up you bring. So if they get to perform for three hours, then Ileana Douglas pulls up, you bring her

back, we gotta get to Wayne Stock. Of course, you know how I feel about my fans, Wayne and Garth. Of course. And then they're walking, the animatronics have to do all this and play accurate chords. Then they're on their way to the limo and then the evil Helga from the video game Revolution X swoops

in with, I don't know, ninjas, spies, whatever. She has it at her disposal. She is General Goons. Hey, I have some great memories of playing Revolution X. Switching between Area 51 and Revolution X at the game room at Disney's Key West Resort, which is crazy to think about how graphic both those games kind of are.

Oh, yeah. Very violent. You're just firing shots into a concert. Just firing shots, yeah. And I believe tying other stuff together, you are like, I think the secret weapon that you unlock at the end of the game is a big CD rifle. So Aerosmith, again, going all in on CDs.

Oh, yeah, you're definitely shooting CDs at some point. I think the CDs function like grenades in other games where you can clear the screen with CDs. Well, I think we've come to the end here now that we're discussing all of the multimedia that Aerosmith has been a part of. The primary one and the greatest one being Rock and Roller Coaster.

It seems like this thing's good. think we dig the rock and roller coaster maybe less so paris although you hey it takes all kinds sure and i haven't been on it so when i make it out well i will never probably see it unless i go maybe replaced by that will be well then you know we we wish you a fond adieu, a fond au revoir. And I'd also just here as we, to play us out, here's a little thing. I didn't realize that Aerosmith, in addition to the film appearances, in addition to the video game Revolution X, they did two other video games. Did you guys know that?

The Guitar Hero, there was an aerosmith guitar hero and then yes yes i played that okay uh how was it well actually i mean another version is of of what i was saying earlier not another version um uh sort of to continue what i was saying earlier is i played that with an ex-girlfriend in 2008, and she was like, Aerosmith sucks, and we played it, and I was like, well, maybe they aren't so good. So yes, I played that game. No, you were just under her spell, like the villainous Helga of the Revolution.

She was a lot like Helga. That's true, now that I think about it. But you un-kidnapped yourself. But they were part of another, a third video game that I only heard about today, a CD--rom actually called quest for fame oh there it is okay and it was kind of you heard of it before no i just remember like a string of like cd-rom games with a celebrity there were a a friend and listener

of the show tyler burton is there's a lot of crazy like rock oriented c-ROMs, which, I don't know, we'll justify talking about them on the show somehow. We'll bend the topic. They were sold in theme parks or something. Who fucking cares? So this was kind of a proto-Guitar Hero, where the vibrations of your V-Pick let you play along with your favorite band, Aerosmith. You didn't need a full guitar like Guitar Hero requires. All you need is your pick that's attached via USB cord, I assume, and you can play it along a tennis racket or just your leg.

It's just strumming against anything you want. And so just to play us out, I'm going to play a little bit of the gameplay of quest for fame this is what it sounds like when you add your tennis racket guitar to dude looks like a lady uh but with that with that being said before i play us out here uh you've survived podcast the ride uh check us out at podcast the ride on twitter uh on instagram uh we'll try to post some uh some helix there and uh hashtag helix 2.0 point spelled out we'll figure it out we'll make it available for you by the time you head there um hey uh thanks so much for listening

everybody and here now is you playing with Aerosmith