Podcast: The Ride - Six Flags Great America with Colt Cabana

Episode Date: March 6, 2026

Colt Cabana (AEW) joins Mike and Jason for a lively discussion about Gurnee, Illinois’s number-one amusement park, Six Flags Great America! 🎢 Will there be any talk of the nearby Gurnee Mills? I think there’s a pretty good chance! "Alf's Music Career" episode is up at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon.com/PodcastTheRide⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠FOLLOW PODCAST: THE RIDE:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/PodcastTheRide⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/podcasttheride⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠BUY PODCAST: THE RIDE MERCH:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.teepublic.com/stores/podcast-the-ride⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠PODCAST THE RIDE IS A FOREVER DOG PODCAST⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/podcasts/podcast-the-ride⁠ See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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All this plus, AEW's Colt Cabana joins us to talk Gurney, Illinois's Six Flags Great America on today's podcast, The Ride. Welcome to Podcast The Ride, a theme park podcast hosted by guys who only drinks soda if it contains a $5 coupon for a Six Flags Park. My name is Mike Carlson,

joining me as always, Jason Sheridan. Hi, yeah, did you ever use that? I think we did, actually. By the way, that's one of the most lie-y, jokes I've ever done at the start of a show because you know you and I are soda hounds. I just want to make sure people know because they're going to find that so disingenuous, that joke. It doesn't make any sense when they know the characters of Mike and Jason on podcast the ride who love soda.

But we did. Yeah, we did use those soda can deals because, you know, you would have like a soda fridge stocked in the Midwest. My grandma had like a same size as the kitchen fridge just full of soda. Maybe there was some like beef in the freezer. But, the soda fridge was full. So you would just have like, if you could add all the cans up, it was probably like a year's worth of six flag tickets in that fridge. We had a little mini fridge in the back of the living room with soda. Okay.

So it's not quite what my grandma had going on. No. No. But I think it's like 40 years old and still kicking in the garage. The fridge, you mean? Yeah. Oh, wow. And is it still soda based?

It's still filled with soda Wow Everyone switched to diet and zero now You think in the back There might be a few cans from your childhood Oh boy Yeah is there crystal Pepsi back there Do I think deep through it?

There'd be a crystal Pepsi or there's like a surge One surge cola Just in the very back Yeah That would be pretty awesome Well look I want to ask our guests I'm going to bring him in now Because I want to ask him about soda fridges

We might just throw the topic out today and talk about soda the rest of the time. But from AEW wrestling and from the world of podcasting, he's a comedian. He does it all. He's a jack of all trades. It's Colt Cabana. Welcome to podcast The Ride. Hello. I thought I was doing a different podcast.

Same size of the kitchen. Which is what. Same size. What did I say? How did I describe it? You said, she had a refrigerator. Same size of the kitchen. I think I meant same size as the kitchen fridge.

No. It was same size of the kitchen. I am in for that. It's crazy the timing about it. First of all, I wrote down some notes for my agenda today. And one of them was $5, $5 off on a Coca-Cola can. Right.

And so I don't know if this is a joke you're making every podcast. Of course, you know I listen to every single episode, but I forgot if you make that joke every episode or not. I know you know, but we don't. We don't make that joke every episode. We may have made a version of it. It was specifically for this. for this. It's a new, we try to write something new. Sometimes it's like lazy and sometimes it's

pretty good. I think this one was like a B minus, honestly, as far as funniness. But it clicked with me retroactively, so I get it. That's good. Were you growing up, because we're going to talk about six flags, Great America today from our home state. No, no, no, no. Or wait, yes, no, it is Great America. Did you think it was the one in Santa Clara? No, no, no, no. I can't. I It kept trying to auto-complete when I was looking stuff up to Great Adventure, which was my six flags. In case you don't know, he's pretending to type to just show us what it's like when he types. And now they're all making fun of me by also typing. I guess I shouldn't make fun of a man I've never met, but it's so.

Which is fair. No, I know. We met minutes ago and just hopped right into it. That's good podcasting, though, as far as I'm concerned, making fun of strangers. And their visual cues as opposed to their audio cues. Yeah, yeah. Right. Yeah.

So, yeah, Six Flags Great. America, Gurney, Illinois. So we're talking about soda cans because in case people out there don't know, this was a big deal, especially in the 90s, because you get $5 off your admission. If you brought in Coke, I think sometimes it would be on Sprite, too. I think I found something that was a Sprite can thing as well. So did you do that growing up? Yeah. Yeah.

Well, first of all, we drank. We drank. Well, we drank caffeine-free diet Coke in my household. We had a lot of that as well, yes. The weird bronze can, right? Yeah, I guess it was bronze, like golden-y bronze. I found it last week and somebody goes, they still make this? And I go, yes, I found it in like somebody's fridge.

The good news is also I hear on Soda Talk is I have recently found, not recently, but it's a caffeine-free Coke Zero, which I've been diving into. What color is that can? It's got like, it's your classic Coke Zero can with a tint of the beige, bronze, gold that they were working with.

So they remind you that, hey, you remember this from the 80s? Like, we're going to make it cool again. And, you know, yeah. Yeah, I'm, I needed to switch over because I don't drink coffee. I don't drink tea. I don't do cocaine.

So I, you know, I want. like I don't want that much caffeine, but I love a Coke. I love Coke Zero. I love, you know, cherry Coke Zero. And I'm just, if I'm drinking a couple cans a day, that's a lot of caffeine. I don't need. So if we can get some caffeine-free stuff, perfect.

I love this discussion because this is where I'm at too. Like, I don't need more caffeine because it makes me anxious. So like if you get to like eight o'clock and you've had two cans and where I'm having like an anxious day, I'm like toast. I can't to get to bed that easily. anymore. People are calling you Sam. People are calling me Sam. Tukans Sam. Yep. Wild. Go on.

People are just looking at me sideways. So yeah, I'm looking for this cherry Coke. Did you say was cherry Coke zero? Just regular Coke. Caffeine free Coke zero. Okay. But there's no. So then I have to buy like a cherry syrup perhaps to add and make that at home. I would never. I would never, but feel free. Okay. Because that's what like a cool like soda fountain place would do is they would have a separate like thing of cherry. and then they would do the cherry themselves. But that cherry has to be full of sugar, right? Yeah, but I can, I don't have to promote a sugar-free cola.

Yeah, that's true. But there's probably some, like, gnarly chemical that's sugar-free cherry, like maraschino cherry flavor. But I don't want to know, I know what I'm getting into, but I don't want to know, I don't want them to directly tell me, hey, this is a chemical cherry. In my head, just let me think it's just the aspartame, and then we're drinking away here.

It's not going to be called a chemical cherry on the bottle. Well, if it was called my chemical cherry, I would be into it. Because it resembles the name of a band. Yeah, because I'd be like, oh, this is cool. It reminds me of going to a concert. Yeah. Well, if the logo looks cool, if they got a good graphic designer for it. A heart somewhere in there.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Zigzag broken. It's like bleeding, but the blood is cherry juice. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd be into it. Yeah. Well, somebody take the idea.

The black cherry parade. Oh, very good. Right? Very good. Yes. I think Colt doesn't seem to like it, but I like it. I don't want to, I just don't want to bring race into it. I don't feel it's appropriate.

No, no. Like the black parade. That's a kind of cherry. Yes, of course. I stepped in it again. We know. Oh, Jason, no, you'll be all right. You'll recover.

When we get talking about the rides, you'll recover. But yes. we were talking a couple weeks ago called about topics. This is the first thing you mentioned. And you said something very exciting to me, an important event that you themed to Six Flags. Yeah, I, for those who don't know,

I am now like a 28 year professional wrestling veteran. I was obsessed with professional wrestling my whole life. I got into professional wrestling at 18 years old. While I was going through college, I would travel to the smallest, weirdest towns in America, being a professional wrestler, and then going back to my university city, western Michigan, Kalamazoo, Michigan, to then be in college and then go back to like a barn in Kentucky.

That's how much I loved wrestling. I've made a living at it for so many years. And as a Jewish boy from the suburbs of Chicago, when it was time to have my bar mitzvah at 13 years old, and as if you don't know what a bar mitzvah is, it's becoming a man. and then you have this big party where everybody, every parent tries to outdo every other parent and have the biggest, grandest party of all time. And these parties have a theme. And of course, as someone who was obsessed with professional wrestling, had all the magazines,

had all the dolls, had everything. What was my theme? Six Flags Great America. Wow. That is wild. That's how much you were into Six Flags at the time. That's how embarrassing trying to be a cool dude at school was who loved pro wrestling is. So was the choice made because you felt a little embarrassed about the pro wrestling stuff or because you just six flags?

100%. Okay. Six, sorry. I'm sorry to disappoint you. Let it be known. Number two on the list of my things that I enjoyed in life was Six Flags Great America. Number two is pretty good. Number two is not bad.

There's no way. getting a first kiss on a dance on my bar mitzvah if if the girl that I'm interested is at the King Kong Bundy table you know so really I didn't think about that yeah yeah they just like look at this nerd you know so I had I'd be like oh people like Great America that's a normal thing I go there all the time maybe I can get a hug and a kiss so it felt like cool because all the kids thought it was cool. And it was a correct calculation? It felt cooler than wrestling. I'll say that. And yes, anything would be a correct calculation. Yeah, okay. So when you say like there was a theme table, did you have tables theme to the actual rides? Each table was a ride. There was a

centerpiece that we made that was just like an overall roller coaster. And I can't really remember. it definitely said like, you know, my, my fake name is Scott. It said like Scott's, you know, great, great bar mitzvah America or something like that. And then each ride, each one was a ride. And then I, you know, I called my mom yesterday just because I'm a great son. And in that conversation, I was like, hey, I'm doing this podcast about Six Flags. Do you have any memories of me? And the first question I asked was like, do you have any memories of me like getting in a fight or getting in trouble at Six Flags?

And she was like, no, which was sad. Because I know there was some Tom Foolery or shenanigans that went down. But she did say, you know, it was your bar mitzvah. And she goes, I remember that we tried to get in for free so we could take pictures of each roller coaster and explain that it was for my centerpieces. And we could just, we'll be in, we'll take pictures and then we'll leave. Which is weird because I definitely had the season pass. Right. So I think it was my mom trying to get in.

And I don't know what happened. I don't know if she did eventually pay or she was just like, you go in, grab some pictures and then come out because you have the past. So you did get the photos and you have, I mean, you don't have to access them now, but you have pictures of like whatever, like the Batman, the ride in one of the tables basically in the center. Yeah, laminated, two-sided, laminated, I would assume. Wow.

Was there a Looney Tunes table? I don't think there was, but my brother, who is an animator by trade, his centerpiece to his bar mitzvah was Looney Tunes. And he drew all of the cartoons himself. And he still has some. Yeah. That's cool. That's a nice brag too. Like, look what I did.

Right. If we could tie it in. And I remember being like my, I felt some. shame as a not as talented person being like he was able to bring this and and kind of like brag or show off to, you know, the ladies that he's trying to get a hug and kiss from on that first dance. And all I had was like, oh, there's my roller coasters that I like to ride. Yeah, that is more of a like showing off thing versus just like I'm a roller coaster enthusiast. Which isn't quite as attractive perhaps to ladies. Now, a certain ladies, yes. Ladies in our audience, perhaps.

but maybe not in the world at large. Now, can I ask, did you get a hug in a kiss at your bar mitzvah? I got a first dance, which I guess the hug would be you wrap your arms around the woman. And then she puts them straight on your shoulders. That was to the extent of it. I think it was 10 years later, I would eventually get my first kiss. It's about the same time when Jason and I were on. So I think we can relate to that.

as well. Did you, was there any, like, did you get, I guess I was going to say like Six Flags music, but I guess that really wasn't available on YouTube to get like the commercial from Six Flags and have you enter to it. We did get, we did pay an old man to run in and do a song and dance, but he didn't show up. Years before Mr. Six on TV, but you got him early. Oh, was he after 93? I believe, yeah, it was a few years after that before they had.

Of course, we've done an episode on Just Mr. Six, the icon, an old man that danced to the Vanga Boys. Du, do, do, do, do, do, yeah. Yours was just one of your uncles cutting a rug. Yeah, yeah. To Abba. Yeah, I don't know. The Vanga Boys, I don't even know if the Vanga Boys had formed by then in 93. They were just still working in the garage on the sound.

Just loving Barbie dolls, right? Were they Barbie girls? No, that was Aqua. No, no, that's Aqua, yeah. Yeah. damn it. Yeah, it's all right. It's okay.

There's no doubt that there were like dance parties where they played all this music at Six Flags. This is all perfect Six Flags music. So you were there like for, do you remember like what years were your prime like maybe weekly six flags? Well, 1993 was my Bar Mitzvah. So I would say 1990. I was 10 to 95 were probably my prime years.

Now something that I would have brought up that my mom also brought up. And I should have just had her on the podcast. Jesus. I keep talking about Marsha here. They would, and I don't, you tell me your experience is they, we got a season pass, me and my friends. My mom would drop us off in the morning. And then at night, the other mom would pick us up at 10 o'clock at night.

And she was just blown away. And I guess I don't know how it works anymore. But like, she said, could you imagine just letting kids free, like, Roman? around like that's not a thing i don't know if that's a thing anymore yeah it depends i mean we didn't go that frequently so i would be like once a year with the whole family i never really got to like like hang out as a teen there in the way you're describing which i'm very jealous of because i would have liked it but yeah we would just go as a family but like i'm trying to even think of like the version of like when i was allowed to do that and where maybe a disney world when i was

like 15 or 16 that's around the time junior junior high school for me yeah it would be the equivalent of the mall right like but they it was just you can do whatever you want 90s 93 93 94 95 and yeah we would just we would go there for hours upon hours and then of course it's like they're only giving you at that time probably 10 bucks for food so you have to like ration it out and of course nachos were probably 850 yeah yeah so especially especially Especially me, you know, especially, you know, we, like my family is just like, they weren't like, here's a hundred bucks. Get a six flags, uh, souvenir cup and sunglasses. It was, here's, here's 10 bucks if you could make this stretch.

Like you said, Jason. God, I should look into like with a menu, like the prices by looking at old menus to see what you could do for 10 bucks. Because now $10 isn't even a meal. Yeah, I wouldn't even know what you could get for 10 bucks. I think like, I think I ate at Six Flags Magic Mountain. three years ago at the Johnny Rockets, and it was like $27. It was just,

it was out of control, which is like a arena price. I would say they didn't even have restaurants at that time. Hmm. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, maybe it was more like the quick, like those quick service places,

right? There might have been one, I mean, there was, I would, I think we can for sure say there were no good restaurants there. Well,

I hear Cardona talking about Disney and just how it's like, like it's like sit-down restaurants are such a part of experience now, right? I think he likes those more than he likes the rides in a lot of ways. He likes to go to Epcot and go to the restaurants. I mean, we do at least equally like the restaurants with the rides. So we're not, it's not totally dissimilar. But yeah, that's a big deal.

That's for a person who goes so much that the rides aren't even a, they're going to that like they're going to their local like common section we would have called it growing up I don't know like the local neighborhood I guess or downtown district you're just going to Disney just to hang out because you have passes for the year so it's not that big of a deal right? That's what yeah and that's what that's us too

like we will do that and it's really like you just want to be near the rides but you don't even need to go on them and I call it like sniffing the magic because you go down to Anna. you go to the hotels. You don't even have to have like a nice dinner, but you could have like a snack, sit in the hotel, do your work and then leave. I've done it. I will do it again.

I highly recommend it if you, if you're able to do it. But it is that. That kind of reminds me of like when I go, like we wrestled AEW at a show at the Hammerstein Ballroom and I left a little early and I'm out the back door and there's all these like, there's fans out there who are waiting for autographs. and there's still another hour and a half of the show.

And I'm just like, if you're that big of a fan, aren't you in the show watching the wrestling? And it's like, no, they just want to be around it. Right. Yeah. Also getting the autographs is their number, they're running a business clearly, but. Yeah, if they have like the stack, that's the business.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's, those are always the airport person like accosting William Shatner with like 50 pictures. and he's like in a wheelchair or something. You're like, leave him alone. What are you doing? Right, but in this instinct, it would be like,

Shatner is like putting on his one man play and they're not inside it. They're just outside, but they like William Shatner that much, but it's, I don't know. It's the same for you. You're just as weird. Don't think you're not.

I know, I don't, don't worry. I don't have any misconception. Yeah, I think it depends because some people are fans of things and then some people end up becoming just more fans of the human being that does the thing. Like Mr. Six. I'm not, yes.

Some people like Mr. Six, but don't like the theme parks. They just like how he moves and entertains. Well, he just moves and grew, yeah. Yeah. And didn't they try to, do we, we've, I've already forgot the episode that we did, but like, what, didn't they try to bring him back and make him like, sexier?

Am I, am I crazy? Or no, was it, you know what it was? We found out who the real Mr. Six was, and it's like a hunky, sexy dancer guy. And it was like, I mean, we knew it wasn't an old man, but it was almost like I felt like I had been tricked. They definitely brought him back a couple years ago. I remember this.

But I think it didn't work. And Six Flags isn't such a mess, I feel like that it just doesn't. I did find the 1995 map here. If I can pull it up, if we can see if there's any visible restaurant. Oh, wow. This brings back memories.

This is very nice. nostalgic right here. Yes. These maps are really... Jason has a lot of, like, maps. That's a thing he collects. As a 13 year old or is it? Like my, my job was to, you know, like, was to get from

ride to ride to ride. Yeah, of course. Yeah. So these, it's kind of like, you know, like, just get some food in me so I'm not hungry. I'm not looking for the best possible food. Now, of course I want nachos every time, but I'm just saying, Just get the food in me, so now I can go. I have the energy and the carbohydrates to move it to the next ride so I can get on.

And the goal is is to get on the major four, major five or whatever it is. Right, right. Would you ever have a two nacho day, do you think? I don't think the $10 would have stretched me to two nachos. Oh, yeah. That might have been too much. I love nachos so much. When I was in college, I would work to shoot the bowl downtown.

And I worked as a nacho vendor. And every time you would have the nachos and I would put an, I would call it the secret nacho. I would put one nacho in the cheese cup and then I would put the cheese, the cheese was over at all because one of my favorite things is when you get down to the end of the cheese and you feel that like mystery hidden soggy nacho. I feel it's the best nacho that's just been swimming in nacho cheese all day. And I feel that just got there by mistake most times, but I would give it to everyone because

I'm a giver. Wow, really? So you would give them what you consider the best nacho. Mm-hmm. And hopefully they'd be like, that's the best nacho guy here in Grand Park. I think I feel, I'm trying to think how I feel about that last nacho. I think I don't like it. I think I feel the op.

I feel like it's too texture-wise, I'm looking for the crunch. So when it's like tastes like too soggy, I think I don't like it much. But you're going to get 40 crunchers, all right? This is dessert. This is dessert. Yeah, I'm with call. hold on this one. You like that soggy one?

Yeah, I like the soggy one, yeah. Would you guys, would you guys want like an oops all soggy nachos where it's all the soggy ones? I mean, don't tempt me with a good time. Yeah, at least once. I was telling someone the other day, like I'm such a sucker for a gimmick pizza.

Like every gimmick pizza as a kid, it didn't matter. I was buying it. So, you know, when Stuffcrest came out, good Lord, it was, And so I think like, yeah, like I'll try it at least once, the gimmick nachos. Okay. I wonder if anybody does that.

That is a pretty good idea to do just all soggy nachos. Have them like soaking all day or have it be like a whiskey and it's like we soak them for two weeks or two months prior to you eating them. A timestamp 27 minutes, 34 seconds, Colquibana LLC. Okay. Just saying that for legal reasons. Go on. That could be lucrative in the future. All right, let me, let me do a little history of the parks

and we'll, of course, still talk about our growing up experiences. Because, like, I am jealous what you're saying. We would go once in a while and I was a coward. I should say that. So when I was a teenager, if I was hanging out, I would like try to get out of going on anything big and scary. Really? Yeah.

So I would be like in Looney Tunes land primarily. I will say this. This is breaking gender norms when I would go with my parents. And we did actually, we went to, we enjoyed theme parks, a good amount that we once took a trip to Ohio Sandusky. What's that one called Cedar Point? My dad was too scared to go on the rides with us and my mom would go on the rides with us. I don't know if that's a theme that you've found on this podcast. I feel like it really varied.

Like everyone is different. I don't feel like I felt like it's one way or the other. It does seem like you would think, oh, the dad is the one who's like, he just wants a little adventure in his life so he's willing to get on the ride. But I feel like he hates it. He hates these fucking kids so much. Yeah. Well, that is the, that's like the marketing for anyone who was male and had kids up until

maybe like 10 years ago was like, come on, dad. I know you hate this and you're mad the whole time you're here. Here's some shirts that's got grumpy on it. and it says like always grumpy, you wear that shirt, go to the park with your family and suck it up. But like, I do think that's probably dying off because now it's a generation of like child adults who all like this stuff or at least more people like this stuff than the old days. Right. I thought you're going to say a t-shirts are expensive now, so. Well.

Well, they certainly are that. They certainly are. There was a- The generation of child adults might like some of these parks more. more than their kids. Kids just want to get back to their, to, I don't know, Roblox on their phone. Can you do that?

Yeah. Yeah. That's possible. We'll see. I have a little kid and we'll see what happens. But she so far loves Disneyland and thrills. So, I mean, she can't go on like Batman the ride yet, but she probably would. But let's do a little history, Great America.

In 1973, Marriott, the hotel company, decided they wanted to get in the theme park game. And they were going to open three separate parks, and they ended up opening two. They opened up Great America in 1976. It took them eight years to go, never mind, we want out. This business isn't working. Let's sell us to six flags. Marriott's Great America. Yeah.

Two Marriott's Great. One in California, Northern California. the point. Yes. So there was like they were like sister parks. I think they called them in all the language. Which would be. Yeah. Do you think their plan is like let's get them staying in our hotels and then they'll go to the thing? I think they saw the money Disney was making and we're like, well, we do hotels already. Like Disney was theme parks. Then they got into hotels for their properties. So they probably were like, we do hotels. We may as well just add a park next to the hotel and here we go. But I think they found this a hard business to make money.

they identified underserved like areas that could probably handle a big amusement park and it was northern California, uh, outside of Chicago, six, five, his great America, which we're talking about.

And then they, they were going to try to build in Maryland, Virginia area, but there was too much, uh, local resistance to it. Which also happened with Disney's great America, or no, sorry, Disney's America.

Yes. The unbuilt, like, America theme park. There was just too much resistance and historical battlefields and stuff that they didn't want to build too close to. They didn't want to destroy a bunch of history for a new Marriott, Great America Park. It also sounds like the Terminator, like the resistance wouldn't let us build a theme park. It sounds cool. Yeah, it sounds cooler like Star Wars. But it's really, when you say resistance, we mean like some angry people.

A guy's backyard. Like a guy's house. I like to think it's 2045 and it's the resistance. Yeah, no. It's like an old man at a town council meeting going, we don't want to lose something. Was he dancing with a cane and big glasses to the mega boys? He was so upset he didn't dance. That's how that's when he was.

You know they're mad, yeah. That's right. So they got out in 1984, and I feel like when you look at like commercials from the old days, there was a little more like charm in it. I'm not saying there wasn't the like fun 90s of it all when we grew up, but like the early stuff, there was a different charm. And I have a video here. Me, you ask me what's up, Doc?

Okay, I'll show you what's up. Look up for fun. Look up everyone. It's Marriott's Great America. The shoes are up the car. So that is Mel Blank, the actual original voice of Bugs Bunny, singing an original Great America song to bring people to that park. And, yeah, I mean, obviously, marketing would change because it's, like, a lot more like

Americana homespun kind of vibe versus 90s, which is more like extreme. Like, that was the whole thing. but it definitely felt like they were going for more of like that Disney vibe back then, for sure. Like gentler, softer. Seemed like fun. I like the thing that was kind of standard for a couple decades at a lot of parks where it's like, and we've got roller coasters, we've got a super toll observation tower, and for some reason we have like three dolphins.

Every park had three dolphins. Every park had like three jumping dolphins regardless of the climate of the area. Did it have a sea aspect to it? No. Well, in the commercial. I think there would just be an arena. Yeah, there would just be an arena with a pool, you know? There's so much stuff that's like even lost.

Like it's hard. There were probably full like attractions or shows they did that aren't even archived very well online. Like I had to go to a, not that this was a, nobody had to twist my arm, but I found a Six Flags Enthusious Facebook group. And that's where I found so much of the information about stuff because just like rides are just not, you can't really find very much. So I don't know. I mean, we should Google dolphins and six flags.

I'm trying to think back. So like when I would go, first of all, I vividly, now that you say this, I remember going to see a hypnotist at Six Flags. a hypnotist show. But I remember we would only go to shows if it was too hot and we needed to be in air conditioning. Yeah, sure.

Yeah. As a kid, I was not interested in these shows. Mm-hmm. But I do remember going to because we needed some AC and we needed to get out of the sun for a bit. And, you know, it was 12-hour days, you know, we were putting in time. Sure.

Would you do like Batman stunt show, though? Which was cool and a draw for me, I feel like as a kid. Yeah. Yes. I would go to the stunt shows, but I wasn't like, it was just kind of like a time wasteer or, hey, we just did like four rides in a row. Like maybe we should space this out a little bit.

It wasn't driving me. Number one was getting on those fucking roller coasters, you know? You were like, yeah, very single focused when it came to that. But yeah, like, Batman's stunt show was just like cool, like, because I love Batman. I think it was my mom coming and being like, and I had to live, like, this is some therapy stuff here, just being like, what did you go on? And I had to be like, I went on a shockwave and this and that and Iron Eagle and Giant.

You know, like I had to give her a big list. So it justified, you know, me having a yearly pass. Yeah, yeah. Now, did Cardona tell you that we, he must have, that we wrestled at Six Flags? That was my question. Did you ever wrestle? I don't know if he has told me that.

We wrestled at the Louisville ones when we lived in Louisville for OVW. Oh, yeah, that's familiar, yeah. But later on, they did have wrestling at Sixth or Great America in my wrestling career. I would say like mid-2000s, but I wasn't like friends with the promoter and they were just using their local person. So I never got to wrestle there, which I wanted to. Right. But they did have some wrestling in the 2000. Wow, yeah, wow, that's interesting.

I saw, I don't remember what the company was. I saw a wrestling show at our Schaumburg Medieval Times. Nice. in like 2000 and it was weird like to Tonka main evented yeah it's probably windy city pro wrestling now I've seen a few windy city shows and I can't remember if it was because a guy I knew from high school trained a little bit a guy who had a better backyard fed than us in the sense that he had more decorations and he was comfortable telling all the parents about it so they would come and watch and then they invited us over and we discovered that we were better

and again, this is relative. I'm not telling you we were good, but we were better at it than they were so much so that one of the guys was like, he told one of our guys, I'm dropping the belt to you tonight. My friend was like, we're not coming back here.

We're not doing another show here. I'll see you at medieval times. So the one guy who organized it though trained for like a year, I think, and he had like one or two shows that we went to see. And then he claimed that, he made up the styles clash to me.

AJ Stiles finish finishing move. And I remember at the time because I was very much like lordsofpain.net guy Like I knew there was a guy named AJ Stiles who made that up because like Crash Holly started using it too and I was like, I don't think that's right. I don't think you did make that up.

But he said, no, no, no, no. I made it up. And I was like, oh, okay. And then I think I saw him like lose in a six-man match. and he kind of got dumped on his head and then that's the last time I ever saw him. I haven't talked to him since.

And that man's name is Rocky Maya Villa. Oh yeah, you know what? You're right. That was his name. Rock Johnson. Wow. I don't even know. It's only the biggest TV star in the world.

Dwayne Johnson? Dwayne Johnson. Yeah. Dwayne Johnson. Rocky Viya is the father? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. But I couldn't think his real name.

I'm pathetic. Well, it's Rocky. Yeah, anyway, so we know. We can look it up. So, yeah, six, I feel like if you were just like in charge of entertainment at Six Flags, the doors are open for anything that's like just PG rated entertainment. You probably have like a blank, somewhat blank check within reason to just hire entertainment for various events, wrestling, music, hypnotist. It should be a live podcast, quite frankly. Podcasts, the ride should do a show at Six Flags. There was a time in my, in my career, what I would, I would have, and I kind of, so, oh, God, oh, you know what I should, we should have done for this show is Butler. Where? Butler's. Have you ever heard of the Butlands camps? It's in England. I wrestled there.

Why didn't we do that? Oh, that would have been, I mean, it sounds good because you're excited about it. I literally wrestled there for three straight months in different towns. Really? Oh, my God. This is the, this would have been really good. I, f. Can you?

explain it a little? Yeah, so there was three different, but, so essentially, uh, in like the, when there was like the war of like Britain versus France, you weren't allowed to leave the country, but the rich people wanted to go on vacation. So they set up these places called butlin's camps where they would set up rides and all this fun stuff and there, and you would go there, and it would be like a vacation. Now eventually the floodgates open and people started going to Spain and then Butland's camps were still alive and so they were for like the lower economical people. It was kind of for like poor people.

You would go to Butlins to go on vacation. And so they had all kinds of, they had all kinds of stuff. You know, you could see all kinds of stuff. But it was all low rent. And they had wrestling. And so as a wrestler, I would go to, so I would travel on Monday to Bogness, Bogner Regis, Tuesday to Skegnes, Wednesday was a day off,

and then Thursday was to Minehead, and then you would do it all over again, and you would do it like then Friday, Saturday, Sunday, the same loop. And they had three different ones and you would just go in a triangle. And I did that for three straight months, and you would just go to each one and you would live in like where the, where people, it was called like a chalet. And we were part of the entertainment was the wrestling.

But that's where as a wrestler, you become such like a great wrestler because you're wrestling six days a week. It's for fans that it's like, you know, these fans, they're just here for local. You like learn how to do wrestling. You learn how to like manipulate just normal people, what works, what doesn't work. You know, Brian Danielson, like he was there doing it with me too and Chris Hero. There's a lot of like great Americans that went over. Not to be confused with Great America, the place.

And so that was, yeah, that was like the, I think it was like the Kittyland, equivalent maybe of of England. Man, I screwed up guys. Wow, I really fucked up. I fucked up. Yeah. Right in America? It was just my bar mitzvah. This was my livelihood. You lived. You lived

this. Wow. Shit. That's, I mean, look, the episode is ruined. Sorry. For sure. But, I mean, I think we can, we'll push on, but it's going to be, we're all going to be imagining the better version of the episode. Oh, my God. But it would just be like, they wouldn't

even I would introduce like I just did I introduced you to a whole new world of rides and entertainment and places well you can come back I mean you can come back I don't know if you want to but you come back and we could do that no thank you

it's like my friend saying to the other guy we're not coming back we're not don't drop the belt to me it's the same basic thing uh well that I mean did you go on rides did you like go on the rides I mean they assume they were carnival rides like a Ferris wheel and maybe a Yeah, I don't think I ever did.

It was a lot of stuff just for kids. Oh, okay. So maybe they were even smaller. Yeah. Because like the local carnivals would be like, Tilta Whirl, Gravitron, Ferris wheel, that type of thing. Yeah, you get a crick in your neck,

a crick in your neck from a match, and you go on Gravitron, and it gets it out, you know? Right, not make it worse. It would get it out. Not make it worse. No. Rides heal everything.

Yeah. I always, those local rides, you don't go on those. I used to. Oh. Yeah. That's a no-brainer. I used to go on a tilt-a-wirl. I used to, I would love a tilt-war or a gravitron.

Now, you're right. I mean, those are set up overnight by some carnies. Not that the carnies didn't know what they were doing, but the actual equipment, I'm sure, was not top of the line. And they had been touring it for God knows how long. Right. That's from the Marriott days. They probably had old

1976 stuff from Six Flags. Now, you said the Gravichon. I don't mean to lead this podcast as a podcast host myself of 10 years. Of course. So my favorite ride at Great America was the one where you go against the wall and the floor drops out. Is that the Gravichon? Yeah, well, I think it had a different name and I should look at up what they called it.

But yeah, that's the same ride. But the one I would go on at the local car. Carnival was like a Gravitron, but they had it. I think there was an accident on the one at Six Flags Great America. There was. And I believe that's not the reason they took it down because we would go on it, little thrill seeker boys being like, there's a chance we could lose our leg here. And we're still willing to go on this thing.

That's, yeah, that is a different mindset from when I was 13. It was definitely like, we better, we better contact the authorities and see if the authorities can step in and close the ride down. Wow. Maybe by the time I was like 17 and 18, I was a little less like that. But 13. So I had to overcome a lot as far as fear getting older and going on rides. And part of it is this podcast has made me braver.

Oh, it's just recently. I mean, the last seven years. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. But still, it's too late. It's, we're talking mid to late 30s when the growth starts happening. so it's not so like, oh wow, look what he's done. It's still sad and pathetic.

I always say, listen, I've traveled two million miles on United Airlines. I'm just saying, like, odds are I'm not going to die on this plane. And I say the same thing with these rides. Like, yeah, people are dying, but odds are, it's not going to be me. I mean, that's good. That's how you should have, you have to live life like that. Rolling back a little bit, I just want to shout out a guy who designed the Six Flags Park. because this unlocked something that I've been befuddled by for a long time.

And it's specifically it's Six Flags Magic Mountain, Six Flags Great America, and then the Six Flags Park in Northern California, is that the layout of the park, to me, always feels odd and confusing. And I think you would call, like, Disneyland like a spoke design where there's a hub and everything kind of branches out that way. there's still like you can get to the lands via other little roads, but there's sort of a central hub. As I recall, it was just a Six Flags Great America was just kind of a big circle, but go on. Yes.

I didn't know that it had a name and I didn't know there was like a philosophy behind it. That's what I'm getting at. There's a guy named Randall, D-U-E-L-L, who was the lead designer of the park, and he came up with something called the dual loop, which was his version of how a theme park should flow. But it is. It's basically just like a big confusing loop. And I'll say this, I don't think I like it. Oh. I, especially at Magic Mountain, I get so confused where things are.

And I mean, there's a lot of elevation there, which I don't know if I get like tired. But like, it's a confusing way to set a park up, I think, because unless you really know it very well, which I'm sure you did when you were a teenager, I feel like you can't figure. So he came up with the dual loop, but he also came up with like, um, the music inside of it, too. In the loop? Yeah, we, I think he called the dual leper. Oh, man. I really, I swear I thought of dual lepa. It just the abstract.

So it almost felt like you pulled that and then put it into a joke. That was me. It felt surreal. No, I, that was all him. I agree. Don't try to steal valor. Mike. No, I'm not, I'm not trying to say I stole the joke. I just dual, the dual. That was, I know, that was UCB 202 classes and that's all me, okay? I would have gotten,

I won't take it from you. I'll edit out the part where I even say that. But this guy, Duel, Randall Duel, he worked on like the Wizard of Oz and other movies. He was like a big deal who would design stuff. And then he started designing places. He designed in a place called Freedom Land USA and a place in Massachusetts called Pleasure Island. Years before Michael Isner. Years before Michael Eisner would open Pleasure Island in Orlando. But yeah, so this guy is responsible for the confusing layout of Six Flags parks and other parks around the world.

I love like Marriott's just like, we need the best. Who do we call? It's like, you got to call Duel. You got to call Duel. He's the only one that'll know. Get Dool on the job. Get him on the horn. He's retired.

He's on a boat somewhere. It's like, I'm not doing it. I said I would never do this again. I would never create another loop. These kids, fine, I'll do it. But you got to give me a bottle of whiskey every day. I was insane. I want a million Marriott points.

That's a better deal. I came across that I hadn't really seen before. In terms of like people working on stuff, And in this case, parks enabling other parks, which is the Marriott parks had the Looney Tunes first. When Six Flakes bought Great America, that let them do the Looney Tunes at all the parks. Yeah, they inherited the rights to use the Looney Tunes from the Marriott deal. That's a good here. Let me show you this, because we've talked on the show about something, I believe it's called

the Bugs Bunny Review, which was something they did. early. I think it was gone by the time we were kids and teens. But it presented an odd scenario where Bugs Bunny was like basically like doing this weird chant where he would say, I want all the people in the audience to say, what's up

back? And we found this bizarre Scott found this bizarre clip. But it was it was slower, which was the weird thing about it. So it almost felt like you were being hypnotized. and they had some version of Bugs Bunny review and I found a picture of it. I didn't find like a video specifically about it

but here's the picture I found and tell me if this is a little disturbing. Whoa. We're looking at it or my 13 year old weiner would have been on fire. There are four human women in leotards or you know, pink bathing suits with wrestling games.

Unitards And they have Singlets They have Bugs Bunny heads On their heads Which is sort of What we had found

Months ago But again Just the oddness Of this Really strikes me Because they weren't like The bugs Bunny heads looked a little

Rough They look a little fucked up They don't look Like Pugs They look And this predates

Lola Bunny By a good While Yeah That's right Jason Yes And this

picture kind of looks like they all have like a giant gray mustaches or white mustaches. Yeah. It's, it might just be that the heads were dirty. There's a chance that the Bugs Bunny is were just filthy and they hadn't cleaned them. But yeah, this is just, I don't know the extent of this show and maybe that's something we have to later on down the line get into, but I just wanted to highlight one of this. And I do. As someone, right, I'm 45, so I was born in 80.

So like I do wonder like because we went to Six Flags probably my whole life up until whenever, you know, like even when I was young, I'm sure they started taking us there. So there's a chance that, you know, a six year old Colt was in 1986, you know, watching something like this. I can see it happening. I guess, yeah, there might have been something. Yeah, I'm not sure exactly when this went away, but there was probably some version of it. I mean, I don't know. Like when you're that young, I mean, this could have shaped your whole sexuality potentially. Correct.

I'm not saying it did. I'm just saying it's possible. And you see an image as striking as this. Human women legs with a Bugs Bunny head, it could mess you up for life. Mess you up or put you in a great position. Or unlock your potential for life. Thank you. Yeah, made you one of the strongest power players on Wall Street.

How many power players on Wall Street are asking a dominatrix to put this outfit on? Tonight. Put on this, put on this stinky, dirty buzzhead. I thought you were going to ask how many bunny women I could have sex with in one night. Bugs. Oh, I mean,

I would just assume it would be a lot. I'm just assuming. So, a la lorgy? Well, like, lo la lorgy. Is that what you're getting at?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean, okay. I hear it. We'll work on it. We'll work on it.

Right at time. Yeah. Did you want to copyright that, too? No, that's for workshop purposes. Oh, Just I don't want to forget about it. Just put it on the whiteboard.

Okay, yeah, sorry. What were your favorite rides? What was like, are your number one? Well, I'm kind of looking through, like, I think Shockwave was the big one. Yeah. Like when I was a kid and that was it, shockwave. And then, you know, I was going there long enough where they're like,

hey, we have Iron Wolf. Is that right? Yes. And then Iron Wolf became the, big one and then even then i was going then batman became the new one wait what iron wolf is the one where you dangle your legs right yes okay uh but i'm looking through this and like you know eagle was always uh a classic because it was the wooden roller coaster and you did think there was a possibility of dying on the eagle and then years later i would go back where they started running the eagle backwards

you remember that yes yeah and And so I kind of, like, I think Eagle Backwards was like a real treat. And I think it was like, you know, like a chase before they had a chase, you know, like a Chase figure or something. So like, oh, yeah. You know, like you only got two weeks to ride the Eagle backwards. Right. And so that really sticks with me as like trying to get that, like thinking you're really

special if you can do the Eagle backward. Yeah, that is, that stuff now for sure. Like, they do a thing in Disney World where during Christmas time they'll run Space Mountain and just play like loud Mannheim steamroller Christmas music and flash red and green lights and we just talk about this all the time

like we gotta get down there for Christmas to just do the ride we've done a million times but with different music playing and like a very disorienting way it doesn't even look pleasant it just looks like it and like we can then say we did it and it was an odd experience

like they did when 2007 or 8 I forget or maybe earlier two rides at Disneyland featured music from the Red Hot Chili Peppers. And I am so happy I got to experience that. I will brag about that forever. It was Space Mountain and California Screaming. I feel it might have.

I might have participated in that. I would believe, yeah, it was a big, they, like, marketed it heavily, too. I do remember that. What else do we have? The Viper was kind of like a path? What was the one for, like, Oh, the whizzer.

That was your starter. Yes. Or like that was there for like if you were just getting into coasters. If you were, yeah, that was your first one. It was kind of basic, but it was a roller coaster. And so that was your first one. So there's some nostalgia to that. Right.

I was on the Facebook, this Facebook fans of, and everyone was talking about how Shockwave gave them brain damage. Oh. But I had, even I knew. And that, that does recall. something is that you you stick your head to the side and you push it there the whole time. Was that a thing? Well, you just started doing roller closures last year or something, right?

So you don't know this. A little longer. Yeah. Last week. That was a technique. Was to make sure you stick your head to the side because you knew it would Bing, Bang, Boom. That's what people were saying is that they would be pinball, their head would get pinballed.

Yes, 100% on it. And then, yeah, you would have to do something like that. I mean, there's still coasters, like the incredible Hulk that'll do that to you at Islands of Adventure. And like, I'll still kind of gray out on that thing. You just really got a plant in like an uncomfortable, I mean more comfortable than getting a concussion, but like plant in that way.

Would you, I'm trying to think, would you go on it? When you were 13, would anybody ever suggest going on one of the kid rides? Or was that like no way? Yeah, I think it was no way. Yeah. But also it's to the point where like if these lines are huge, it's like we're looking for anything. Right. So if all the lines are huge and we're looking and we're like, all right, this, like, I don't know what you would consider a kid ride, but like just like the pathetic one where you just kind of like go like this.

Right. I know that's horrible for audio, but just up and down like in a circle. Yeah. We would rather, we would rather, I think, like I. I know, like, I'm kind of transitioning, but like, I do remember bringing home some basketballs. So we would play the, the carnival games. And I had, apparently I would, I would win. I don't know how, like, I assume they were all rigged, but.

You probably got so good at them because you were there a lot. I wasn't, I did go to Doug Collins basketball camp for five years. So probably shooting, you know, I could make, even though the rims were probably rigged, right, it's not a full circle. It's like a oval. I probably did drain some. It's a star or something. Yeah. Well, that is pretty impressive because I've never won any of those.

I won something maybe like once at a universal park, but like six flags, forget about it. Let me ask you this. Did you ever go on something, this unlocked a memory when I was looking into this, something called Space Shuttle America. Do you remember this? No, I don't. 1994 is when it opened and I am sure I did this it was a space shuttle like this you can see like a pretty decent looking size space shuttle that you would go in and it was a like simulator ride which was very like I think I do remember this yeah so I do remember something like this and I remember not for me because it wasn't giving you any legitimate thrill Yeah, I didn't like the ones where you just sat there and there was a screen in front of you and like it moved a little. Like I wanted to be, I wanted the wind through my hair, my little Jewish fro, you know, I wanted, I wanted the thrill of my hat maybe flying off.

So I put it in my crotch and that like caused anxiety the whole time like will my hat fly off. I can't even enjoy this ride. You know, my glasses like do I wear my glasses? Do I not wear my glasses? Because these things could fly off too. I wanted that. And these like Captain EO things, they don't give it to you. Yeah, no, they don't.

But for scared little boys or teens, you're like, oh, this is pretty cool. I'm soaring above earth. Or tweens or 29-year-olds. Hey, look, simulator rides like that, you know, you might not lose your Velcro wallet, so you don't have to worry about it. That's a very good point. Pluses and minuses everything. But they did, I was impressed because I'm reading about the ride and it's like they made up things.

Storyline of the ride was that riders have to have boarded a new space shuttle called America, which is capable of transporting passengers to the fictional Armstrong City using the LRVM, the Lunar Run Velocity Management Warp. Armstrong City is located at a short distance from Tranquility Base, the site of the first crude moon landing. So this was like a fantastical ride in addition to being a simulated. They had like lore, at least a little lore with six flags. I was a kid who was never into Star Wars or Star Trek. You know, like that stuff, it just doesn't.

Yeah. It never really did it for me. So like there's people, I understand there's people who are a world, like people really love that mythology or whatever. Right. But like, I'm just such a dumb sports kid. I was just like, uh, up down. That's what I want.

I mean, it makes sense. We all like up down. Up down is a very basic thing. Up down. Bugs Bunny, I know who that is. Like, that's what I want. Nachos with dip cheese. They use this place, this simulator for other movies, which I need to look into. One is called Escape from Dino Island in 3D.

One is called Stargate, SG 3000, which I'm assuming has something to do with the show and movie Stargate. And then something called Superstition, which was like a horror theme, a horror themed thing at Fright Fest. So they like, they use this theater for other stuff. and then they demolished the whole thing a couple years ago. But then I also was looking at this. They had an IMAX theater at Six Flags as well. And they would show like original IMAX stuff,

but then they would also show movies there. And I don't remember that at all. And I remember, again, that being a big deal, like we got to go see the IMAX and then sing it and be like, okay, I can never do this again. Get me on a ride. For sure. The Pictorium Theater is what it was called.

and yeah, I was like, we've done some IMAX talk on the show, and all those IMAX movies are, some of them, I should say, are lost to time as well. So I would love to know, because this was built pretty early in the theme park, the theme park. If you can watch those on YouTube or whatever. Yeah, and I can find the one that they referenced here for six flags, but they're all sitting somewhere in a vault, I assume.

You asked me if I would, go on a kids ride. Yeah. And you know what I would do is if I need to fill some time, I would go to a warpy mirror and look at myself hilariously. So yeah, like a phone, whatever the fun house was. I would go to the old western town and find those mirrors, yes. Right.

Sure. So that was so. Bumper cars? Bumper cars. You had to like bumper cars. Like to run into each other. Yeah. I would also do a bumper car, of course.

That's like a whiplashy thing. That's fun. There was a thing. Mike, I just sent you a shockwave ad. Yeah. Will you pull that up? Sure, yes. I just because I went down to rabbit hole of like looking at the old roller coaster TV ads.

And all the late 80s ones, it seemed like they, it seems like it's the same style. and possibly the same, like, production company. I only bring this up because you mentioned Shockway specifically, Cole. So, but it, it, these have, like, there was a certain thing about them. That just makes me laugh.

You are the ride of your life. First we'll drop you 16 stories. Then curly wind a colossal 360-degree loops. You'll ride along on the highest and fastest roller coaster in the world. New Shockwave, once you ride it, you may never be the same. Shockwave, the ultimate thrill only at Great America. Wow. It's great nostalgia.

I remember that 100%. There's a guy, yeah. It's like a businessman in like a yellow dress shirt and a tie, and he's going. and they're beating the shit out of this guy. He is so scared and by the end he looks like an old man that's been electrocuted. He looks like Doc from Back to the Future. He looks like Doc from Back to the Future. And that is the way they used to market stuff.

I feel like they don't do that as much anymore where it's like, come and do this and we will destroy you. That was all right. And that worked. And I feel like maybe I look, I'm not going to get all Bill Maher here, but the kids are too sensitive these days. You can't mark it to them and say that a roller coaster is going to make them look like Doc from Back to the Future

with electrocuted hair. You know, maybe we're missing a little of that in these times. But there's ads for like Z-Force and I forget what the other one was. So many of these rides have been moved to other six flags. or just there's an ad for power dive and they are all like so similar like similar interrupting your daily life

that kind of narrator talking like this it just makes me laugh looking back yes let me switch do you remember a tradition that they would do for Fright Fest where they would put a giant spider on, I believe American Eagle. Yes.

A tiny, the spider, a 40 foot spider that would be climbing the roller coaster. Let it be know that this is, as someone who lives in the city now and drives to Milwaukee a lot, this is right off of I-94, the highway. So you see, you always see it.

And so even though like I went there X amount of times as a kid, someone who travels for work and drives a lot. Like whenever you pass by Great America, you always see it and it's always nostalgic. So even if I only went to a handful of frightfist as a kid, even if that many, you always drive by and see the giant spiders. So as you show them in the picture, of course, I remember this. The giant, this is awesome. I wish there would be more giant spiders around Halloween because this was cool.

And I think they did it for many years. And then apparently the giant spider was stolen one year. year. Oh no, I heard it went south for the winter. That might have been another year, but I'll say this, I was on the Facebook group and a guy, I won't say his name, somebody wrote on the Facebook group, went to high school with the crew that borrowed her. Yes. Hearing they got her all the way home was pretty epic. And then a different guy goes, same. So these guys knew whatever crew high schoolers got up on the coaster and stole a 40 foot inflatable spider. And I'm very impressed by it.

The picture you showed us, like, it even looks big there. So like, like, just from this picture, it's like, Jesus, that's huge. So imagine how big it is. Like, you need a hundred 17 year olds grabbing that underneath. And it's still not comfortable to like walk that all the way back to Walkiegan or whatever. I know. Like, I wonder what, how long the statute of living. limitations is on this. Like, could the guys who perpetrated the crime confess and explain now just for

our entertainment? Yeah, I'd love to have a, I'd love to watch like a 14 minute vice documentary on that. I know, because it feels like it's like more complicated than Ocean's 11 to get this thing. Like, there'd have to be, yes, so many people in coordination and wouldn't one security guard have noticed? No, dude, like tank would always just climb whatever. We fed him a couple beers and he just climb up the eagle and grab. He did not care. Do you think there's, it's still rotting, there's like rotting folded up, rubber sitting in a garage in Gurney somewhere? Yes.

Like they never got it back. Yeah, of course, probably. Because like, Six Flags probably was just like, oh, Tiny's gone. Ah, shit. All right, well, what are we going to do? I don't know. Let's just open the park and hopefully somebody will bring it back. Like, I just don't see them like going on a manhole.

hunt for this thing. I don't see, I don't remember like some nationwide search for Tiny the spider. I'd like to see. Mike, are you, what's it? Are you saying they stole it off the coaster, not just when it was in storage or something? It's a little unclear, but it sounds like they stole it off the coaster. I hope that's what I envision. That's what I envision. That's much fun here. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. Tank would climb anything. He'll go up there and grab it. Yeah. I love the idea. though you probably it's probably like oh yeah it says some ocean's 11 thing but it is what you're describing like hey tank you want to fucking climb the coaster and steal a spider man yeah okay they like crush a six pack of beers and goes and pulls it down yeah like we could jump

off of it like the blob thing into the lake it'd be great yeah it's probably like three guys who were six beers each six beers in deep each and they just did it one night and it took like 10 minutes they were shocked at how fast it was And I know that area pretty well, like that checks out. Yeah. So that's a little bit of lore. Speaking of American Eagle, okay, this is something, this isn't, I mean, it's, I found it because there was a picture from the ride, but this is something I did not know

existed. This is an animal I did not know existed. And what I'm talking about is, so I'm looking through these photos and I see this picture, I believe it's of American Eagle. and there's a man riding in the front car with a dog. And it says, this was, again, this is in the, I should name the group, although maybe they'll be mad. Six Flags Great America Junkies is the name of the Facebook group. But this says, Zonker, with his owner Bonka, are riding American Eagle in 1981.

Zonker, the dog, had ridden over 100 roller coasters. and I was obviously fascinated by this because we have not come across. I don't think Zonker the dog who was a roller coaster fan and I did a little extra digging and I found a video of Zonker and his owner

talking about this and you tell me if you're delighted or horrified by what's going on here. Hi, Joe. How are you today? Hey, Stretch. Oh, Zonker.

How are you today? You all ready to go? Huh? He's all resting. He's rare to go. Well, the Wildcats ready for him. I'll see you up there. All right.

Hey, Junker, want to go for a ride? So Zonker, yeah, they're going on Zonker's 100th ride. And they have a sign to celebrate this occasion. And this guy with a headband is leading a dog to the coaster. and Zonker gets in the front seat. He wouldn't get out until we went again. Ladies and gentlemen, what a hack to get that front seat, by the way.

Yeah, I know. You just got to bring her dog to get right to the front of the line. Today, by doing this, Zonker will achieve his canine fantasy of riding 100 times on a roller coaster with his friend Joe Biron. So they say that Zonker is about to achieve his friend Joe Biden? Joe Bonka, I believe. But they say he's about to achieve his canine fantasy of. riding a roller coaster a hundred times. Is can...

I mean, I don't know that that's his canine fantasy. I guess it's possible, but... I want to lick, lick, lick you from your head to your toe. Move to the bed. What's your canine fantasy? Uh-huh. There should be like a McGruff parody song where he uses those lyrics.

So Zonger's about to go on his hundredth ride. Confetti's thrown on them. No, forget that. They're soaked in confetti. And Zonker... There's no way to latch this dog down by the way. No. This man is gripping his dog for dear life so the dog doesn't fly out of the coaster.

He has a lap bar, because he has a lap. Of course. This is crazy. Zonker. No lap. Zonker is a large dog. There's another dog. They cut to another dog looking horrified in this piece.

I don't know if that's on purpose. You say horrified, I would say jealous. Oh, he's done 100. And he gets the front seat every time. That's my canine fantasy. Zonker has more coaster credits than I do. Zonkers in the American coaster enthusiasts, and my owner won't even buy me a membership.

I mean, Zonker was braver than I was up until I was 30 years old. So Zonker is, I appreciate that. So then this guy goes on a talk show with Zonker to talk about the phenomenon. So the man looks like young Frank Oz a little bit. And he's sitting there with his dog on the talk show here. Are you trying to say that's a puppet dog? We should investigate. I don't want to say for sure.

Oh, my goodness. Now, how old is he? He's nine and a half. Uh-huh. Well, he's just gorgeous. Now, how in the world did you get started in this? I mean, how did you get him to do all this? Well, I'm a roller coaster historian. He said, I really want to go on the big dog rides. She asks him how we got started and he goes, well, I'm a roller coaster historian. That's his first thing, which is some, I mean, both Jason and I are married, but that is something we would say on a first date if we had to go. And when he was a little puppy, we went up to Santa Cruz, California, and the roller coaster came down the hill.

And he ran in utter panic, stayed under a car for 15 minutes before I could get him out. Oh, my goodness. Then he spent four years traveling with me and finally got used to roller coasters. And one day he hopped in. So. Oh, you pressured this dog? It only took him four years of forcing the dog on a roller coaster before it didn't completely panic. And then

they just changed the narrative into the dog likes it. And that's what the dog has always wanted. So this man was abusing this dog for years. And then he still was abusing the dog. It's just the dog maybe became more like docile or something. I don't know. I'm not sure what this guy was going for.

And this is another like, oh, we got to like deep. Maybe we don't want a deep dive into this guy. But I'm going to after this episode like investigate a little bit more did he ever try to push other animals to ride roller coasters? I think he's worthy of an episode by himself. It's very, I mean, it's very possible that this roller coaster historian. You showed the picture in the Facebook post and you're like, this is a dog zonker and his owner Bonka.

And I was like, okay, got it. It just like moved on. But I did have a moment where I was like, wait, is Bonka the dog or the, what's one? he does have a dog name for sure. Yes. All I know for sure is that Zonker single, like with no S, is the name of the dog. That's all I can tell you. I mean, I can also tell you he was abused, but other than that, that's all I can tell you.

And you're saying he wrote the eagle, right? That's, yeah, that was the photo I found was him on the American Eagle with his owner clutching him for dear life so the dog didn't fly out of the car. So I guess my question is Because Eagle historically was not a loop-de-loop one So I wonder if Zonker went on loops Or did not go in loops I mean that's crazy Zonker could not have gone on a loop-to-loop

Did this maniac With the ride restraint Coming down over his head You couldn't do it I could picture you go in the loop Zonker falls down And then as you come down He like drops back into the card

The dog falls. And yeah, it's really got to be timed well, but I guess it could happen. So I don't know, yeah, maybe full Zonker episode of Podcast the Ride coming soon. But I was, I was blown away by that. That feels like when they would make a horse jump off of a diving board into a little pool of water. That feels like really old school in its animal abuse. Wait, that unlocked a memory. I think I saw the giant sky dive or diving from the very like 300 feet up at six flags.

Really? Would I have seen that there? Maybe. A horse? I've seen. No, not a horse. Just a human. Like the platform that's like a box,

but it's like 300 feet in the air and they do a crazy dive. I would believe it. I mean, there's weird stuff. Yeah, that was a common park entertainment. because you can just pack up the ladder. You can pack up the ladder and board it and you pack up the pool pretty easy. Yeah.

They would, I mean, there's all that, like, we found a couple years ago that there was a thing at Disneyland for a year or two where a guy would get shot out of a cannon down Main Street and land in a big net. So like,

I'm sure Six Flags was doing like high jumps and weird stuff like that. But that's what, I mean, that's what's kind of fun about Six Flags is it's, it's really like you're like an archaeologist digging through Facebook groups and you go, oh shit, they had a guy jumping off of a 300 foot diving board. And that's the only record of it. That's the only place you can find it.

And then it unlocks a memory. But yeah, Zonker. I don't know if anyone in the audience, I guess they would have to be an older listener, but saw Zonker ride a coaster. That would be a pretty big celebrity sighting. Look, you know, those speaker dogs, they like to play pretty rough. So a wooden coaster is not out of the realm of possibility. I like the wordplay of Rough there, too.

Oh, yeah, yeah, accident. I of course did that on purpose. Yes, you're right. Yep. Well, Colt, what do you got? What else are any other memories to share? Any other things? Yeah, a couple things.

First of all, this was my very first fanny pack. Oh. was coming to Six Flags Great America. Now I never wore the fanny pack afterwards, and I never liked wearing the fanny pack. I've always been against the fanny pack. My friend, you know, in the wrestling world, it became like a real big thing because you're traveling,

but I just, I've never been for it, but I understood the importance. And like Jason was talking about, like losing your Velcro wallet. There's just so much stuff that would fly out doing some loop-de-loops, you know, including your dog possibly, that I knew the importance,

of getting a fanny pack. So that's a core memory. And then also something we didn't talk about. And I don't know if this was at other places was the Twicket. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah. The rain, the rain check basically,

you could come back. You come back the next day for a dollar. Right. Which I always remember being like, oh, okay. You're like, fuck, I have a season past. Like I can't get the value of, like it's only a dollar.

That'd be such a great value if I, you know, if, but I, oh, man, I have a season pass so I can come whenever. But I wanted that value because they would always be pushing the twicket. Right. And it wasn't just rain. It would just be like at the end of the day, they would get you back. Yeah. Just to spend money on hot dogs basically. Like they just wanted bodies in the park because they would spend some money on concessions.

But yeah, we never, I mean, we never, again, we were like once a year if that. So we would never, we would never do. that. Like, I've talked many times on the show, like, I'm upset with my parents for feeling like these things had to be, like, once in a while things. Because, like, now for me, it's, why not every day? My experience was they gave us Twickets because it was, like, a summer, like, torrential rain, like, most of the day. Like, most of the rides, like, only opened for, like, an hour or two. So they're, like, here's some twilight. Quickets come back.

And then when I had to write like 10 years old, write how, what's an interesting thing you did on your summer vacation? And I said, well, I went to six flags and it got rain. So we got Twickets. And then my teacher tried to dock points from the essay because she thought I misspelled ticket. And I'm like, no, you don't understand. I said, no, I spelled a correct.

We got, you know, they call them Twickets. for Tweety Bird. And she's like, oh, okay. And I got a Twikki. So that was my Twiket experience. Yeah, it was correct. Did you get it corrected? It was correct.

Did you have to bring in like proof that that's what they were calling it or did she took your word for it? I think she took my word for it because then I explained Tweety. She's like, oh, okay. She took his, like, God damn, this weird little 10 year old. Fine. Shut up. kid.

She took his twirred for it. And then he started writing that way for everything. Like he was Tweety Bird in school. I do have, I just, I'm running just into like older memories too, which I know this isn't. Just I do remember we went here at the end of,

first of all, I always recognize that we were a lot closer than everyone else. Like everyone else that were at, you know, we were a 20 minute ride, if they had 25, 20, you know, 15. So like people were coming from all over. and I was always grateful how close we were.

I do remember at the end of high school, like senior year we got to go there. And so that brought me to like days when no one was in the park. Oh. And so, and I'll tie that in with like my friend worked for the board of trade. And there was like board of trade night

where only people, families of the board and trade can also get in. This was towards the end of the year, like October or November maybe when, you know, once the season was finished. So I remember in high school, with my friends and then also like board of trade night where you could just run around and you could

literally knock it out in like two hours if you wanted to and that's that's the dream I think right yes anything yeah anything like private event I mean I don't I'm trying to think the closest we can get like sometimes all like ticketed events where they have like a lot less like a lot less capacity basically or there's not as many people in the park and you can get on everything really fast like I did there was like a 90s Disneyland night, and everybody was really focused on getting, like, pictures with Mickey and his, like,

track suit from the mouser's size. They didn't care about getting on Space Mountain, so you could get on Space Mountain in two minutes or whatever. But, yeah, the dream is just no waiting line and feeling like you have the run of the place. Yeah, that was... And I'm saying that, I don't know if they have... They must have fast track stuff now, right?

Like... You mean, like, fast stuff? Yeah. Front of a line. It just wasn't a thing when I was a kid. Yeah. You just lied and said you were handicapped. Uh-huh.

Disney started it in the 90s, and then every other park has a version of skipping lines now. Do they have, they must have that, right? Yeah, I forget what they call it. Flash pass. They call it Flash Pass. Yes. Flash pass. Because they have the DC characters.

Oh, it's based on the Flash. Yes. Yes, the flash. They have a Justice League Battle for Metropolis. And they're all like... Which are all little different kind of... They're all bad in their own way.

They're all bad in different ways, which is nice. But yeah, it's... It's been too long since I've been. So next time I'm in town... Because I have a few family members, but my parents moved out here, so I'm not back there as much as I used to be. But I got to go next time to really see how it is.

Pull my leg. Fine, I'll go with you. Okay. I wasn't going to ask. But how long was the last time you were there? I was just going to hope you asked is what I was saying. 20 years? I don't know.

It's been so long. Yeah. Yeah. So that's got to happen next time I'm around because it's been too long. But, yes. Mike, this was like an hour from where you grew up. Yeah. Champ, F, four.

40 something, 50 minutes or so. But you still call that you used, you would call this Carlson Country. The Gurney, Gurney, Illinois? Gurney, Schoenberg, the whole area. Schaumburg, yes, I would call Carlson Country, yes, because I was bold. But not Gurney.

I mean, we'd go to Gurney Mills, the planet Hollywood and Gurney, of course. Did you ever do that cold? I mean, I was a staple at Gurney Mills, of course. Of course. Gurney Mill is very exciting because they had like, it's the first time I ever saw popcorn that was dyed different colors. And I was like one of the kiosks.

And I was like purple popcorn? This might just be for me and you. But I was like, it was after the LJNs were done. And like they were on to the Hasbro's and I went to a KB Toys. And they had on card, Adrian Adonis and ravishing Rick Rood, LJN.

And I was like, oh my God. They hadn't been sold in years. For some reason they had them. I bought the LJN on card Rick Rood. I was like, I'm never opening this. I was probably 14 or 15 years old. Literally within two hours, I went and opened it.

And I was like, I'm playing with wrestlers again. And I played with the Rick Rood. And then maybe for an hour and then I never did again. That on card Rick Rood right now is like $10,000 or something. Wow. You know, like, and I said to myself, I'm holding on to it. I won't open it up. And just my dumb wrestler, I was like, I got to play with this Rick Rood.

I never had it. and that cost me 10 grand. It costs you 10 grand, but the memories and the fun in the moment, you know? An hour's worth of fun, I guess. One hour you had fun and now you're out 10 grand. That's too bad. But it is, I mean, look, KB Toys,

but you would find old stuff at KB Toys, I feel like more than Toys R Us. KB would have stock in the back they forgot to put out. And you would find like an X-Men figure that was four years old. And you'd be like, how is this here? Like it was just a much more disorganized company, it felt, felt like, at least.

Great, great clearance action. Yes, they would find a really weird, like one season cartoon figures. Yes. There were one time, I know, I guess that was Toys R Us. We bought like Flintstone kids toys and they were heavily, like they were 80% off or something. And just thrilling. Thrilling to get that many toys at once when you were little. and now I'm swimming in toys over here

so I'm trying to relive the glory days but nothing will beat finding a toy at KB Toys that you thought was long gone because it was one of the biggest thrills of your life but anyway if we're out of things I will say this is what we say at the end I know you know because you listen to every episode

Cole Cabana you have survived podcast The Ride thank you for doing the show now we will exit through the gift shop, which means you get to plug away. Anything you got going on? Well, you can buy my picture from being on this podcast

for overpriced and we'll put in a cardboard frame for you. Where can they wait for you outside? Which venue? The best is now you can take a picture. Do they stop you from taking a picture of the picture? They must, right? It depends.

There's some like, technology that prevents that in some parks. And then sometimes it's just kind of a shitty low, like it's not a bright image. So you take it and it kind of looks bad. Oh my God. I thought of another thing. Go ahead. Yeah.

What was it? Thrill? It was like in Dallas, Texas, it was only seven things and they were all like thrill things. And it was like, it was the most rinky-dink thing I'd ever been in. And it was the first place I ever bungee jive. And there was a free fall. It was like a I think it was like the thrill zone in Dallas.

I'll text you after words, but it's gone now because I wanted to take all the wrestlers there. And I remember just like it was the craziest day of my life. And I went to this thing. It was ran by like straight up like four hillbillies. The one guy was like, the one guy was just like, yeah, you can go.

I don't, you know, like, pay for three. I'll give you five, you know. But it was also like stuff where you could have easily died. It was, it was wild. Okay. Wow.

But I remember taking a video of the video they showed us. They're like, you can't do that. And I was like, well, I did. They're like, oh, damn it. Because they were trying to make money. They were so car. Right, right. It was so funny. Okay. Me, uh, plugs. Listen, I used to do so much stuff. Now I just don't care about anything. So, um, all my stuff is at Cole Cabana. I don't really do much. I am a producer and, a coach at AEW, all elite wrestling. So we have shows on Wednesday nights on TBS and Saturday nights on TNT. And we have pay-per-views. Oh, and we're on HBO.

So go to HBO Max and find AEW and you could watch a thing that I'm not on, but I'm helping make, I guess. But no one cares about that. Like they, we don't get any credit, you know? We're just in the back. Like talk show writers or something. I guess they get credits, but still. Just know that I'm eating so much food and stealing all the food to take home for the

week also. And that's great. You're also recently, you did our friend Griffin's show. or the George Lucas talk show. Yeah, I'm very comedy adjacent. I love doing comedy stuff. And I think it was easier when I was, when I had a podcast, The Art of Wrestling,

which went for so long that like, I could like mix into those worlds, but, um, I don't as much. But yeah, I love doing kind of all the comedy podcasts and that kind of stuff. And I think I, I can mix in well.

I could hold my chops. I do, we do comedy shows at the Lincoln Lodge in Chicago, myself in RJ City before AEW shows in Chicago. So, and, you know, like I did the Edinburgh fringe wrestle for 10 years. So like I like being on stage and performing and making jokes and being in the moment.

So, but I don't know if there's anything to plug wise. I mean, there's a lot. Yeah, all that stuff is like people can check out. It all lives. It all lives around. It's the internet. Search my name if you liked me. If you didn't,

my name is Mike Mitchell. I'll edit that into the star too. I'll call you Mike Mitchell. People will just be directed. But you're going to assume people will hate me right away? Oh yeah, you're right. We could do Weiger right away. I'll call you Nick Weiger.

I'll edit that in. Thanks. Yeah, as for us, patreon.com slash podcast the ride. We do bonus episodes there. There's all sorts of fun. We just put on an episode about Alf's singing career, the music of Alf, including his very successful German music career.

That is not a joke. He was much more successful in Germany music-wise than he was in America. And the song I found, which was really excited about, was called Elf will be our federal chancellor. So go to the Patreon. Patreon.com slash podcast the ride. If that sounds intriguing to you and check us out.

But other than that, I really am going to investigate this dog that loved roller coaster. I say loved with quotation marks, loved roller coasters because I don't know. I mean, I think I think, I think I'm prepared to find some dark shit is what I'm saying. So I'm getting in the headspace of that. As long as you can profit from it, it's okay.

Well, as long as it's content. The American way. We're all good. This has been a Forever Dog production. Executive produced by Mike Carlson, Jason Sheridan, Scott Gerdner, Brett Boehm, Joe Silio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts, please. visit foreverdog podcasts.com and subscribe to our shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Keep up with the latest Forever Dog news by following us on Twitter

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