Podcast: The Ride - The CityWalk Orlando Saga: Malltiverse of Madness 5 - 2A

Episode Date: March 21, 2024

Two episodes released at the same moment, reviewing the same restaurant but different versions of the same restaurant located on opposite coasts of the country?????? DID WE JUST BLOW YOUR MIND???? Sector 5-2A contains: Jimmy Buffett’s Margaritaville (Alpha) To level up your Saga experience with bonus and ad-free episodes, subscribe to Podcast: The Ride’s Club 3 at  patreon.com/podcasttheride.  FOLLOW PODCAST: THE RIDE: https://twitter.com/PodcastTheRide https://www.instagram.com/podcasttheride BUY PODCAST: THE RIDE MERCH: https://www.teepublic.com/stores/podcast-the-ride PODCAST THE RIDE IS A FOREVER DOG PODCAST https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/podcasts/podcast-the-ride Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

FOREVER! DOG! When your town has made you frown When your square has made you swear When life gives you one more punch You need a donut soaked in Captain Grunge You need a place, a place to stroll With alcohol

A place that features part of the Berlin Wall Where steampunk robots sell chocolate snacks A place where you can tattoo your lower back So let's go take a walk Let's all go to CityWalk Orlando tonight.

Podcast to Ride presents the CityWalk Orlando Saga. Multiverse of madness. A daily, extremely necessary series exploring the shops, restaurants, and cosmic wonder that make up Universal CityWalk Orlando. Welcome to Podcast the Ride, the CityWalk Orlando saga multiverse of madness.

If you're a Second Gate subscriber, this is one of two episodes that has appeared in your feed today. But this, we don't want to suggest an order, but this is probably the first one that you'll listen to, or the only one if you're not on the second gate. Let's get into it. I'm Scott Gardner. This is Mike Carlson. I'm Mike Carlson, and welcome to the Margaritaverse of madness as well, I think, as far as today is concerned. I don't know. Maybe we'll talk to one of the guys here and see if he disagrees with what I just said.

But just prepare for that, I think. Sure. Absolutely. Jason Sheridan. Yeah. I mean, I think the madness is starting to creep in both on the recording of these and also, fittingly, for today's excursion. Yeah.

Madness hit pretty quickly. An operative word, I would say. A key word in all of this. But before we fully explain what's happening here, let's see if we can summon him. Wait, is there a special margarita? I don't know. All right, everybody.

Fins up. Let's see if we can get him. Is he here? Boys, boys. Fins up. All right. Fins up, sector keeper.. Hey. Fins up. All right. Fins up, Sector Keeper. Welcome back.

Fins up also looks like you're praying. Yes, that's right. Like you're putting a little prayer on the top of your head. That's if you go to the youth ministry mass, you do fins up. A little God is an awesome God. Yeah, that's right. Oh, wow. Yeah.

You know, that one always got to me, I have to say. You know, I didn't take everything away from my church-going years, but God is an awesome God. It had a real power to it. And the choreography. Woo! Indeed, yes. I'll put pep in everybody's steps.

So we are here, as you dictated yesterday. Yesterday kind of, yesterday, you know began uh the buffett discussion um and but now today we focus on the heart of it uh the the the core part of the brand margaritaville although we i should let you uh issue the assignment yes yes of course yes today phase Phase five, Age of Buffett, Sector 2A. Yes, which takes us to where exactly? Jimmy Buffett's Margaritaville Alpha, which of course is in Orlando. Orlando, right.

Because it was opened first. You got it, of course. Okay, okay, yes, we're following. As opposed to being the Omega. Omega, which of course- Which is in Los Angeles. And Omega is in, I don't know my Greek letters or whatever, but Omega means second, right?

That's what it means. It must. No, no. I guess Alpha is one and Omega is two. That's not right. But I don't know if this even, I hope this makes sense. It's too late to change the rule. Yeah, you're right.

It's what it's going to be. It's what it's going to be. It's what we got to stick to. All I remember is there was an X-Men comic called Alpha and an X-Men comic called X-Men Omega. And those were the start and the finish. That's all I remember. Jason, you know what I'm talking about?

I do know that's how you would differentiate between the start of an event or the end of an event. So beginning and end. That's what it is. That's what Alpha and Omega is. It's perfect. It's very clean.

I think that comes from maybe. But today, Alpha, if you do subscribe to the second gate, and we encourage you to at patreon.com slash podcast the ride, at the exact same time, if it all worked out, then Omega should have dropped. Omega, which will take us to CityWalk Hollywood. And the idea here is we are having the exact same meal on two coasts, per your request yesterday.

In other cases, we could kind of do different things in the Alpha and Omega, but this one has to be exact to the T. Yes, that's right. Okay, that's fine. We're ready of do different things in the Alpha and Omega, but this one has to be exact to the T. Yes, that's right. Okay, that's fine. We're ready to do it. So I'm just catching up on the rules and the formalities. One of which being, I'm going to clear 20 comments out of our feed really quick because we are covering Margaritaville. We don't know Eddie Burback, the YouTuber who went to every margaritaville in the country

he also went to every rainforest cafe which provoked a lot of comments asking why is it not this guy and the answer is we've never met this man we have no shared friends with this man i actually did a while back try to reach out to his agents who were specifically very unhelpful so that is the reason. I'll save you all the commenting. We would love to have him on the show. I like those videos. They're good.

This journey he's on, is he also trying to escape hell? Or get to it. Yeah, yeah. No, it's a similar self-inflicted punishment to what we do. So a kindred spirit, for sure. We'd love to have him on. If any listeners have a way, a connection to this person, or if somehow he's hearing it by now, Eddie, come on the show, please. But he's not here now.

So you can save the comments for the next thing that makes you upset about this. I want to thank the listeners for thinking that we are more powerful and are more all-encompassing as far as people knowing about us. I want to thank them for thinking that about us. They know everyone. That we could just snap our fingers. They're the talk of the town. They're wheelers and dealers. But anyway, now that that is out of the way, we are here to focus on Margaritaville.

So many phrases to keep straight. Jimmy Buffett's Margaritaville City Walk Orlando. We went and had a meal there. What's the elbow? Sorry. I keep missing them. Okay. So this has always been, I feel like, a cornerstone of CityWalk Orlando.

There from the beginning. And it's this location. Obviously, we've talked much about Margaritaville over the years and various Buffett things. Of course. Yesterday included. But the Orlando one has always been kind of looming large in my head, I think, because some of the first that we ever talked about any of this stuff. Mike, you've always said, well, that's kind of the you didn't say alpha, but kind of you implied it's like the alpha location. Yeah, because it's on the water.

It's relaxing. It like maybe summons those island vibes better than some of the other Margaritaville locations. Oh, yeah. Like ship. Yeah, there you go. That's a good word. The Navy Pier location, the Margaritaville location,

which is near the water, is one of the most unpleasant restaurants I've ever gone to. That's Chicago? Yes, Chicago. Sorry, yeah, Chicago. And it's obviously right by Lake Michigan, but it's cramped and you're sitting outside and you're not like right by the water. There's like multiple like different streets and pavement and people on bikes.

But then it's just it's unpleasant and it's terrible. And the food there was maybe not the greatest. Yeah, so a couple of the ones I've gone to, I've been a little disappointed in the ambiance. And then, of course, you go back to Orlando and you go, well, this is how it should be. This is where you're living the life here. Yeah, absolutely. Really?

Well, and I think there was maybe kind of a disappointment. We're going to talk about Hollywood as its own thing. Right now. We're talking about it right now. You can listen to both episodes at once. Back and forth. Ping pong back and forth. As much as you want.

As we get into our meals, let's try to do it in the same order so that you could. Oh, yeah. All right. Scott's meal, alpha. Scott's meal, omega. Mike's meal, alpha.

Mike's meal, omega. Yeah. It's an interactive experience for you if you want it to be. But Hollywood... They all sync up to God is an awesome God if you hit play at the very beginning

of the episode. Just get on a different computer or speaker system. Sync it all up. If you're a Club 3 member, you can get a free download of God is an awesome God. We made a deal with, I want to say Michael Smith, who's the maker of...

Did I get... Yeah, I did. I did guess... Wow, I am going to heaven. Michael Smith, maker of Our God is an Awesome God. We don't know Michael Smith. Stop asking to have him on the show. Yeah, I know. Look, we know a lot of funny people out there, a lot of good people out there, but we don't know religious singer Michael W. Smith.

We don't know him. We'd love the open invite, Michael W. Smith. Anytime he wants. Anyway, Hollywood opens. Hollywood completely landlocked, you know? Yes. You're not even close to any. They wish they had the Navy Pier situation.

Yes, for sure. You're barely close to a path. Yeah, no, I know. It's so back in the corner. Yeah, it's really tucked away. It's really tucked away there. So, yeah, this one, this Margaritaville in Orlando has always been my favorite that i've

gone to at least and yeah and there's i assume there's other i'd have to check the eddie burback video where he went to all of them yeah but there are some that are along i mean i feel like a lot are on the beach or on a pier or in locations like that but of the ones we've gone to, has anybody been to one that I don't? Because my count is Orlando, Hollywood. I just walked through Navy Pier. Vegas, which Vegas started me off with this brand. We didn't have Hollywood yet. So Vegas set the bar for me, and I loved it.

I was kind of in the throes of discovering the whole Buffett verse. It was new to me. We'd all just been to this concert together. Sector Keeper to fill you in. We all went to see Jimmy Buffett with Nick Weiger and Anthony Gio. You might have been there and still with us. Yeah, I was floating above. It was before we even met you.

Isn't it crazy to think that we maybe met at certain times it is yeah yeah like maybe we were yeah jimmy buffett together crossing yeah crossing over in ways we never even imagined we could have been seeing the same comedy death ray on a tuesday night at ucb oh yeah that's yeah very we also just in a tiny little club like getting to see louis like there's not even that many people he goes on to do madison's for garden but it's just Yeah. That's, yeah, very possible. We also, just in a tiny little club, like, getting to see Louie. Like, there's not even that many people.

He goes on to do Madison Square Garden, but it's just us and Louie. And you and me. I'm just a comedian's comedian. Amen. That's what he was. That's what he is. Is. But anyway, I love, Vegas just, like, hit me so hard hard because they got the whole thing there.

They got the volcano. They got the show that goes to the song Volcano. Right. Despite not being on the water, it's on the strip and that's exciting. I genuinely liked the dish. I think you would, Mike had just been on Doughboys and talked about it. And I think you guys were all pretty buzzing about Lava Lava Shrimp, which I got. And it did not disappoint.

I was like, wait a minute. So Margaritaville is a good restaurant? That is a surprise to me. Because how often are chain restaurants not? That's what I thought in 2016. And then I hear it's coming here to Hollywood. We're going to have it? I'm going to be up there every week.

I'm never going to stop being there. Yes, very exciting. I had been to the Vegas one. Do we go to it? We went to the Vegas one when we went to a bachelor party. We got off the bus behind it. Oh, we went there first. We took a mega bus, which lets you off at the Link,

which is like an outdoor promenade. Yes, and we went to Guy Fieri's at last. That was the last thing we did. Yeah, we had a very defeated meal at Guy Fieri's. Yes, but we had- Ordered the wrong things. Well, I mean, that's up for opinion. We did Guy's Cheesecake Challenge at the end.

What? A whole party? No, three of us. Okay. What is that? It's just a big piece of cheesecake. Big piece of still frozen cheesecake. Yeah. Wow. With chips and pretzels crushed upon it. That's a way

to go to a bachelor party and get your stomach pumped, I guess. Well, you know, you do the cheesecake challenge and you get back on the mega bus back to L.A. That's it. There and back. That's the best of the party.

Yeah. So I do like Vegas a lot, too. I will say that. Or at least the time we had there. I don't know what it's been. I haven't been to that place in a while. But with how highly I was regarding the Vegas location, how my Margaritaville journey started with, it's actually a good restaurant. Yeah.

That just always left me, then what is this Orlando one that Mike has been talking, like if, you know, listeners can't see this, but if Vegas is here, then Orlando is here. It's up above the roof. What is higher? What kingdom is higher than heaven? What kind of, like, how could it be better? Only the sector keeper could answer that. Is there a better higher than heaven? What kind of, like, how could it be better? Only the

sector keeper could answer that question. Is there a better heaven than heaven? Yeah, there's like a heaven plus. Oh, okay. Oh, cool. They name it, like thousands of years ago, they named it the way they name streaming services now. That's right, yeah. There's ad-free heaven. Oh, just like

no billboards and stuff? Yeah, no billboards. They're also in heaven. You do have to see ads all the time. Yeah, just like no billboards and stuff? Yeah, no billboards. They're also in heaven. You do have to see ads all the time. Yeah, you have to see ads still, you know, for communion, blood of Christ. Oh, right, right. Yeah, I think it's got to do there. There is a commercial, though, for the body of Christ right now that's very good. Is it like sexy or something?

Or is it like irreverent? Yeah, it's funny it's oh i bet it's random it's random man the people that are in oh man because you get dead comedian well like rodney dangerfield's up there with you feels there and then you're looking around and he's lincoln rodney and lincoln are in a commercial together in heaven for body of christ oh wow okay you can't get any respect just for going to get the little pieces of bread they didn't answer that wow the one thing that's messed up right now is that i'm in i i'm technically subscribed to heaven plus um they had a black friday deal oh yeah a, yeah. They had a Black Friday deal. Was it Black Friday or Good Friday?

You're right. It was a Good Friday deal. That's what they call it there. We should time portal to change that. Oh, it's okay. I think we can leave it. We can leave it. Yes, they're a question. There was a Good Friday deal.

But, you know, it's weird. When you wake up in the morning you still have to watch 30 seconds of a commercial and when you go to bed at night you still have to watch 30 segments of commercials so you're paying premium but you're still sneaking ads in right right wow wow well heaven's got to make

money somehow that's true that's true yeah it's a lot to keep up an entire like supporting old cloud world I guess I'm going off the regular Christian idea, of course. Right, right. Golden gates, those cost a lot of money. Upkeep. You don't just build them, you polish them.

Yeah, polish them. It's golden gates and clouds, right? Yeah, more or less. Golden gates. There's a Margaritaville. Oh, no way. Yeah. Oh, shit.

Let me edit my notes, because I said 23 locations. Sorry, 24 if we count. But you got to be dead to know about that one. It's Epsilon. That's Epsilon. Epsilon. Epsilon is heaven. Okay. Is that a good one?

Does that have the... That must have the volcano. Oh, it's got it all, man. It's got it all. It's good. Two volcanoes. I think that having one, I think one of the big things that notches a Margaritaville up, high ceilings. High ceilings in Vegas and Orlando.

In heaven, there's no ceiling, I would imagine. And no ceilings, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Even one I've been to, I'm sure no one else has, Atlantic City. Oh, right. I was asking who's been, okay, I've never been to, no, no, no, I don't know Atlantic City. It's part of the Resorts Casino. When it opened, they were like, check out the Margaritaville Casino attached.

And I was like, oh. And I went, and it's like two rows of tropical slot machines. It's not quite a full casino. That's Vegas, too. You just get their carpet pattern next to some slot machines. Right, yeah. Vegas is too. You just get their carpet pattern next to some slot machines. Right. Yeah. So Atlantic City, you can enter from the casino hotel or you can enter from the boardwalk. And then on the other side of the boardwalk and the beach dunes, there is a pier, a little bit of a pier with a Landshark bar and grill.

Oh, they have a separate, like the Lone Palm. Okay. Have you eaten there? I have not eaten there at that location. I believe it's just open in the summers, maybe. Oh, really? Oh, you mean the Landshark? The Landshark. Specifically.

But you have eaten at the Margaritaville? I've eaten at the Margaritaville. Okay. Is Landshark Margaritaville owned? Yes. The beer? The Landshark lager is, yes. It's a beer brand, and I guess bars.

Yeah, I guess there are separate Landshark bars sometimes. And the Landshark beer factors into some of the food. Yeah, and there are also still, I think, but maybe certainly at some point, Cheeseburger in Paradise locations also that are not branded Margaritaville. But they're owned by Margaritaville. But are owned by. Gotcha. Gotcha. Mm-hmm.

Then there's like resorts that have been abandoned by the company. We've talked a little bit about that. The Margaritavillage? Yeah. There's iconography. It's a little unclear. I mean, the Orlando Margaritavillage, where we named a street, is still there. I think it's maybe seen better.

Has it seen better days? Maybe it never saw good days. It's possible it's never seen good days. Probably would have been a good place to hide out during COVID because there was no one around. There was no one around. You want a whole resort to yourself. But there was also a fair amount of loose electrical wiring.

They were still building it. They were still building it. They were still building it. Although also, can you imagine that you go to the cigar bar in May 2020 and it is just packed to the gills? Yeah, of course. Don't go to the resort. Go to the empty housing. Go to the big, short, empty housing neighborhood.

The weird, narrow houses that look like the Cat in the Hat movie that aren't selling. Navy Pier, Atlantic City, what other? Tao, Row. Whoa. Those are all the ones I've been to.

I've only seen Niagara Falls from a distance. I wasn't into the brand yet. I'm glad I am now. Much fun has come from it. I went to one in the Detroit airport once. Oh, wow. Yeah. Our flight was going to New Jersey.

I should just say I was flying to New Jersey. I don't need a stinking plane. And, yeah, got delayed in the Wayne County Airport in Detroit. Completely empty terminal. The only thing open was the Margaritaville. Oh, wow. Emptiness, barrenness is, I guess, associated with this brand. Did you have a meal? Well, I did not.

And it didn't seem like many people that deplaned, even though there were literally no options, people walked the entire terminal and just walked right past. Oh, no. So it didn't peak there. Maybe it wasn't lunch or dinner. Maybe it was an in-between time when you don't need to eat. Yeah, yeah, maybe you're right.

Three, four. But it was vibrant. Okay. Yeah, yeah, ambiance must have. Maybe, four. But it was vibrant. Okay. Yeah, yeah, ambiance must have, maybe that's the top ambiance. I don't know. I'd have to look it up. Yeah.

I'd set the bar high for Detroit Airport. Oh, another one. Put an asterisk next to this one. Times Square? Oh, wait, we've been, yes, we did an entire episode about it. I stayed there for days. Yeah, that's right.

I think of that as its own thing, though. It is. But there is a Margaritaville restaurant technically that is. Is that technically Margaritaville? That is technically a Margaritaville, and it's technically Times Square, I guess. It's a number blocks away. It's in Times Square? Well, it's technically approaching the fashion district at that point, I think.

But yeah, it's near the, you pass the Hard Rock that used to be the WWE restaurant. That's right, yeah. Wow. And Jason and Jane stayed there, and every hour they would call and ask for new towels. I remember that's part of the story. Mike, exaggerating as usual. They were also calling down for the complimentary island water bottles. Yes, the big thing was that the water.

I don't remember the name, but let's say Sally is who you're calling for. You knew the name of the desk person. We need towels, Sally. That was what you were saying. We need more island water. They had been chummy with the desk person because they were calling down so often. Here's the thing. New York hotels, when they only have two elevators,

you're waiting in those elevators for a while. Oh, I know. It was awful. So we weren't going down for it sometimes when we could get an elevator. Or you just go to the gym where they have a whole fridge of waters and towels. Margaritaville Times Square Resort hack.

Go to the gym. Go to the gym. And if you visit every location, you can turn in your stamped card for a little shot glass. Yes, right. I remember this. And then hack number three, if none of that works. Sally! Sally! Sally.

Sally. And you're not going to get this from Benny Bernstack. What was his name? Eddie Burback. Eddie Burback. That's right. He didn't go into the gym. Yeah.

You could be teaching him about that if he was here. Free tropical water. But we're talking alpha, boys. Yes, you're right. Let's talk alpha. So it's been built up in my head a lot. And it's something I was really looking forward to, I would say, during this. The point of this trip is to just plant roots at City Walk.

Then we can have a nice leisurely meal there. And so when it came to pass, I was happy. And going into it, and this was kind of like the full group. This was the three of us and Jane as well. And the level keeper, in fact. Yes. He was there as well. Yes.

So we got to spend a little more time with him. Wait, and Universal employee... Adam. Adam, yes. Yes. Yeah, Adam LaPrade, correct? Yes. Yes, so Adam there as well.

And this was also... Adam had helped us out and taken us to see some exclusive behind-the-scenes stuff. Yes. As he did the last time we were there. So it was like, let us repay you. Let us thank you with a meal at one of the finest establishments that there is. So we got a group going. We get in there.

And the... Okay, things about it, about this specific location, just before we go further. You got the volcano thing. You got the blender thing. I watched the video. I forgot there's a i watched the video i forgot there's a burp that happens yes the burp yes that's part of the sequence right uh the volcano burps and then a big yeah big blender is filled up um but i do you know the volcano

sequence is one of the dumbest coolest things in any giant chain restaurant yeah i think i think it's a triumph and you got to give this one i don't know if we're competing the two against each other but maybe vaguely you certainly got a notch this above omega because they have the volcano yeah of course i mean this thing this should be the i mean you know we've recently talked rainforest cafe this is kind of the draw as far as like next level theming like as far as the rainforestforest Cafe has a little thunderstorm or something. But this is the big thing. It's a real volcano. It's not a real volcano.

It's a real working facsimile of a volcano. Fiber glass volcano. Yeah. Is it better than... I don't know if it's better than Rainforest Cafe. Oh, I don't know if it's better. I'm just saying that's their trademark. And this should be Margaritaville's trademark.

And this should be in all of the restaurants. I'm saying it should be its big feature. They shouldn't allow them to be built without it. Yes. And it's his song, Volcano, one of his 10 songs that people know. That number keeps climbing. People do not know 10 of these songs. Scott believes there are like four songs.

Well, let's show. Okay, Sector Keeper. The Sector Keeper was at the concert. Do people say the big six or something? That's for Disney. That's a Disney character. No, no, no. But there's a set of Jimmy's songs and sometimes the last one or two.

Is it the big eight? The Sector Keeper is more aware of Buffett than the common person, I would say. How many of the big ten? Ten songs people know, can you name? Right. And like Disney, they do locks him in the vault once in a while. Yeah, do vaulted

ones count? I don't know. Some come in and out. Okay, so Margaritaville. Yeah, we got one. Cheeseburger in Paradise. Yeah, we got two. Volcano. Three. Yeah, there you go. We got one. We got one. Cheeseburger in Paradise. Yeah, we got two. Volcano. Three.

Pirate Looks at 40. Four. Okay, four. That's one of the sad ones. Volcano. You said Volcano third. I already said it. That was third?

That was third, yes. You literally just said it. I'm in Volcano Omega. You mean the live version. The live version. The live version. Well, we have to, version. Which date, though? It is like the Grateful Dead.

You gotta have the dates. There's bootlegs. Bootlegs. So far, we're at four. The number I said. Math sucks. Math sucks is not one people know about. That's one that Mike talks about.

How would he know about it then? He's a ghost. I don't really hang out with him that much. Yeah, I've been staying with Jason mostly. Yeah, he's still with Jason. So what am I at? You're at five. Five.

I think one of those is a bit of a cheat, but generously five. We talked about one earlier. Oh, that's going to help. Finn's up. Yeah, about one earlier. That's going to help. Finn's up. Not the name. Give it to him. With hints. With a lot of help, we have

round to have crested the way. We're heading to the almighty easy to get ten. There's a big sad one. Sad one that involves some travel. This is too many hints. I'm cutting off hints. The more we hint. Oh, goodness.

Oh, shoot. Just start making them up. I bet you'll hit it. Okay. I bet you'll get pretty close. Don't you dare whisper any to him. Sorry, sorry. No, I'm just trying to encourage him.

Suntan slips. Shit, yeah, there you go. Yeah, as far as I know, suntan slips. Suntan slips, blunk, blunk. Of course, I've heard that at the show. Oh, goodness. Well, you can take your time. He doesn't have to do it in a time crunch

We'll call him out as we go And we'll prove the 10 commonly known And then of course something that Mike has asserted That not only do common people know But of course listeners to our show know Please now name Jimmy Buffet's guitarist Oh yeah You know this

Yeah he knows this Of course because he's a person in America He knows it. And a supporter of Podcast of the Ride. Not a one person subscribing. Doesn't know the name of Jimmy Buffett's guitarist. Yeah, because when Jimmy played the bull, Jimmy left stage for a while to have wine.

That's right. It might have been fake wine, though. Yeah, it might have been. And this guy did a mini set. Yeah, yeah. And his name is well it'll come to me it'll come yeah yeah okay don't get under pressure here i don't want to put him under that kind of stress all right so we'll let you we'll let you do a take-home test

mac yeah his name's mac wow all right okay all right all right i'm impressed by that okay we got to mac he knows everybody's Everybody knows. They're screaming. They all obviously know. Mac McAnally. Are we allowed to say that you wanted to put Mac's name in the theme song of this series? I did, yeah. I tried. And I vetoed it?

Scott vetoed it. I don't think one of the primary facets of this Orlando City Walk is Mac the guitar player. Here are the songs known as the Big Eight. Just to confirm. The Big Eight. The one with Alan Jackson, right? Well, Alan Jackson wrote it. That actually...

But it's a well-known... It was the only hit, maybe, of all this stuff. That is his only number one hit, I think. Yeah, he's on it. He appears on it, of course. Okay, Margaritaville. Let's go faster, faster. We heard these.

Oh, whoa. Like this Yahoo article says, these will make you feel like you're on island time. I already feel it. We start this episode. Remember, this can be a quick one. Remember, this can be a quick one. This can be a quick one. Cut to Jason.

Margaritaville. Finn, Margaritaville. Number three. Come Monday. Come Monday. Finn's Volcano. A Pirate Looks at 40. That's right.

Cheeseburger in Paradise. Why Don't We Get Drunk. I've never heard of that in my life. I've been with you motherfuckers for seven years. I have never heard of Why Don't We Get Drunk. That is not a big eight. The last one. Not an eight. I didn't say it was an eight.

I didn't say it was an eight. Changes in latitude, changes in attitude. That's fine. That one's in, sure. Great. The lyric in that song is, why don't we get drunk and screw? And screw.

Yeah. Thank God they left it out. Oh, the sector keeper knows. I knew. I did know that one. There is... That's like... If I don't know it,

after hours and hours of buffing content... I didn't say it was the big A. That's whatever article Jason's reading about the big A. Well, I'm reading Wikipedia, and there's a Yahoo article that also lists the same songs. I think that article seems like it has a lot of ads, because you're really scrolling through.

That is how the older a website is, the longer the ads go through. There are a lot of ads, and there's embedded videos for each song. Why don't we get drunk on today? Chances are Jason's getting distracted and clicking on the ads as well. Like, oh, the Sears. I've got to help out Yahoo. $3 off at Rubio's. Jason just downloaded and is playing Royal Match.

I've got to save the king. Please help me. Save the king. Save the king. Speaking of songs I've also never heard of, here's something that even though I was in the restaurant, I didn't know. Maybe this isn't something they do anymore.

Inside, okay. In tribute to the song 12 Volt Man, the back of the bar was covered in car batteries hooked up to blenders that served boat drinks. And then something about the volcano. That we know. 12 Volt...

Do they do that? And what's 12 Volt Man? Not in the Big 8. You're like Boat Trance, the more iconic song. A 12-volt... Do they do that? And what's 12-volt man? Not in the Big 8. You're like Boatrace, the more iconic song. It's a song. I don't know that one by heart. I've heard of it, though. I can't remember how it goes. I did not see if they did something special for the 12-volt batteries, though.

I don't know if that's something that... There's a lyric to this one. Seldom found the trick to arithmetic. So it's kind of a cousin of math sucks. That's like the third thing that he writes about is math being bad. Don't forget there is a third thing.

The big three. Boats, alcohol, and math being bad. Math sucks. So anyway, I'm getting excited because like okay we're gonna have this ocean view we're gonna see the volcano we're gonna see the 12 volts the batteries all of this and then we get seated in kind of a perfunctory lobby we're like right at the front first of all yes like it's a room we got seated in the worst spot i think you could possibly sit in this place. It was pretty bad.

It was pretty bad. No ambiance. It was like being in a waiting room. But close to the bathrooms, which would prove valuable. So there's almost like three sections to this place, I would say. This kind of lobby area, and then there's more tables as you go on the left side of the restaurant by the bathroom then there's sort of the main show floor which that's where you're getting your close like close-up view of the volcano that's where the uh plane is overhead of course not the real

hemisphere dancer yesterday yes the other plane the facsimile of it but it's still like move it's still pretty impressive yeah it's still pretty impressive. Yeah, it's still pretty impressive. And the bar is right there, and that's where the action is. I think we should have requested that. Or one of my favorite places is the porch. The porch outside is where I – that's the first place I ever ate at this Margaritaville. Oh, okay. I ate at sunset. Sometimes they got a guy out there.

He's doing covers. He's playing all your favorite songs, some by Jimmy Buffett, some by Stephen Jenkins, all the hits you could possibly want. And you know what? It points to this Margaritaville. In keeping with generally the Orlando situation, you're much more likely to find performers at this establishment than the Hollywood location, which I think always just has a sign on it to stop people from coming on the stage. There is a stage. And I feel like the first few weeks we went, yes, there would be performers.

Long ago. Long ago. They stopped programming new music there. But yes, this Orlando porch, which I think is the best place to see and eat. You got the view of Jason's beloved Islands of Adventure there. Yeah. You can see the water there. That's kind of maybe my perfect spot. I wasn't even thinking, but they seated us literally like what felt like two feet

from the open door where you walk in. Yeah. Just not quite the place you need. And very near the bathroom, but which is not the best for ambience. We were at least under like a bunch of sharks, like hammerheads and whales. Yes, there were still things to see. There's not nothing. It's not nothing.

Yeah, yeah. But, you know, so first, so we, you know, we're settling into like not the best environment, I would say. This is also the day where most of Universal Studios Florida was down. Yes. Yes. Important to note a like historic park wide. Most rides are shut down. Yeah.

Like six are left. Thus, they are telling people, don't come in. Go to Islands of Adventure instead. Turn around. Thus, that park was like especially stressful, right? And it was kind of surprisingly hot for being November. Don't come in.

There were people at the, because there weren't any, like clearly there was so much stress on the only rides that were open in there. They were like, if you're gay, if you got tickets to both, you might want to consider going to Islands of Adventure instead. They were trying to get people to not come.

I wouldn't stop Six Flags. Six Flags would have a situation where something's broken with the water system and it can't cool any of the rides, any of the breaks, and they'd be like, nah. Or they have like one teen spraying like a little hose or like a little spray bottle on the rides as it comes in. Or putting like ice,

just dropping a piece of ice on one of the wheels. And now there's no ice for the beverages. Yeah, right, right, right. Sorry, no. The drink ice is now ride ice. It's a chain reaction. They need that hose to clean up leaves. beverages. Yeah, right, right, right. Sorry, no, the drink ice is now ride ice. It's a chain reaction. They need that hose to clean up leaves. Grab the broom five feet away. They need that hose.

So your experience, boys, you think it was more crowded because of this? I think so. I found it to be a pretty stressful morning in the parks. There was a layer of stress in the emirate of ill too was oh no empty dead empty well it also i would say all of the morning's events kind of made it admittedly to where it's like two three in the afternoon so we're there

kind of a weird time also yeah so let's start getting into what we ate because the drink order definitely already had something to it for me. I ordered the perfect margarita, which I think I had another margarita. I don't think I need to say what's in it except that it's four margarita aficionados. We don't have

to say them out loud, but everybody, if you took pictures of the menu or you look at the Orlando menu, we should note price. Because if we're having the exact same thing, I am curious, are those prices the same? This is $14.25. If you ever notice when we do the Hollywood one that's radically different, this might be an interesting compare-contrast. But anyway, perfect margarita. It shows up.

Well, first of all, these drinks took a long time. These took a very long time. They took a long time. I will say, waitress is great. She was so nice. A lot of fun. A lot of fun. But it felt like she would forget about us for 30 minutes at a time.

Yeah. Maybe she was just busy, though. Yeah. And also, sometimes you got to blame the broader situation yes of course somebody into that it's the management's fault that's probably in some way another thing that might be i don't know if it's the manager's fault or whoever i feel like maybe she was making the drinks also i don't know it's possible she was doing everything very possibly it felt like things were when there would be things that needed to be fixed they felt like they were

fixed in a haphazard way let's just tease it like that yeah yeah yeah i agree yes making the drinks cooking the food setting off the volcano all right go pour the green goo get it loaded up um the drink shows up and it tastes nice but it has that thing and this isn't the first time i've had this at a restaurant that serves margaritas where sometimes you i like the big wide margarita glasses but sometimes you feel like well i sure did get four sips of that in between the ice yeah like it's the ice spreads and fills out that glass so much i i really felt like this was not a single or a double this was like a this was a quarter i got a quarter margarita and a lot of ice. Do you think maybe, though, it was like a John Taffer-approved amount of alcohol

as far as the restaurant still making money? Because he's very often worried about overpouring. Ice it up! Pour ice! You can do it off ice! Don't sell blended because then you can't water it down with ice! That's why your wife left you. Taffer coming coming to main fee i don't know if everybody heard it you had to be on club three to hear but griffin free so coming soon taffer one coming to main feed i don't know if that's

the words gotten out there uh yes again we're furious about this but yeah i don't want to do it either but yeah unfortunately that's what has to happen. Drinks, fellas? Yeah, I had the Landshark lager. Pretty solid. I do like the beer. It's a good beer. And I wanted to get a very traditional meal. I'll just say that, too.

I won't say what I'm eating yet, but I just wanted to... Because everybody's going to get different stuff, because we really want to make sure we're all getting a wide variety. Yeah, try to not repeat. Yeah, yeah. And I'm certainly... I felt like I wanted to be traditional on this sure so turkey mashed potatoes gravy well that was in his song one of his songs i would have ordered it uh so yeah thanksgiving meal in paradise dofers i get the wish bone

if he had lived a little longer, that song would have happened. He would have. Burned out of ideas. Got to do it. Or when the AI takes over the deceased songwriters and bands catalogs, they will generate new songs. It'll sub out French fried potato for mashed potato pretty quickly. That's right.

That's a very easy switch. You've got to have it already. So yeah, no. And that comes in a bottle. It's hard to screw that up. Okay. You did the bottled beer though as opposed to they did let me just check the photo because now that you're saying that maybe someone else was drinking a draft hmm maybe it was me maybe i'm misremembering because i've had so many landshark lagers over the years that's how you start the day say i don't buy i like the brand uh jason

i think well i was going back and forth i wasn't sure if i was gonna get a drink and then i after they all came i went you know what i will get a drink which was a mistake and that took like another 20 minutes for me um i think i had the passion fruit guava cocktail, which I hadn't had a drink in a while, and it immediately made me lightheaded. Okay. Not in a good, not in a fun, not in a college drunk way. No. Like, oh, maybe I shouldn't be mixing these daily steroids with alcohol. Like, maybe I shouldn't.

Although they, I think, eventually were my savior, the steroids. Well, Jason, Ric Flair used to do it all the time. You're telling me you can't do it? Come on. Move up to Flair's standards. I did have a bottle. They gave me a bottle. Yeah, did you want that?

Or is that just so it happened? I like having the bottle. I like the bottle because it's got the brand on it. I don't want it at a restaurant because I want that. I don't want beer at all if it's not. I actually don't drink beer at all. I don't disagree in most places other than this place. That's an interesting little quirk.

Do you want to see your Landshark? You also get the consistency in the bottle. If you get a bottle at a restaurant, you know what you're getting. You love a frosty glass. I'm not worried about, though. Yeah, the frosty glass. I'm not worried about, though. Yeah, the frosty glass. I'm not worried about they're going to pour it weird, though, a beer. No, no, but if it's the end of a keg, if it's the end of it, I've had some shitty beer.

Sometimes, yeah. But yeah, I do. The big glass is satisfying, especially if the glass is cold. Yeah. There's something about it that is more satisfying, usually, than a glass bottle. That's how we see it. Well, I hope you liked it, because more satisfying usually than a glass bottle. I hope you liked it because you've got to do it again. Well, I do.

I did and I will. Or just throw it out with no or just request to not say anything and see what happens. Good point. You've got to flash back to however you did it before. Does that bottle have a decoration on it? Well, it has the logo. On the top, though?

What do you mean? It's got like a lime in there with a little... A lime. Yeah. Okay. You might just want to throw it out, say the words, and see how it comes out. It comes out, you get a lime. That's part of the variable of repeating the meal. Right, of course.

Meals. Do we have an order? Who thinks they liked theirs the most? okay let's go in opposite order then so again i'm really i go you know what i have to be the traditionalist here i have to be the one to really sample what like the chef would recommend which i think is the cheeseburger in paradise and i said chef at margaritaville yeah the chef recommended also the server also the host written in the largest font like largest point size she did mention the bartender a couple times which is now making me think that was um a fake out it's like it's like trump's receptionist who didn't exist yes so so So I ordered, and I said, look, if I'm going to do the cheeseburger in paradise,

I want the most possible cheeseburger in paradise. So I ordered a double cheeseburger in paradise. A couple times a year, I treat myself with a double cheeseburger. As a child, I think I mentioned this before, I thought as I kept getting older, I would just keep adding patties to the hamburger. Because I remember being like, McDonald's having a triple cheeseburger on the menu at one point, and I was like 14 or 15, and I was like,

well, I think that's just what's going to happen. I keep getting more patties as I get older. Oh, finally, 38. Yeah, yeah. My mouth is like this big open your mouth like homer and the donuts scene in hell uh uh so uh so i go you know what i'm doing and i'm doing the double cheeseburger paradise and i ordered it and it came and there was one patty there was only one patty on the hamburger on on the cheeseburger paradise. I mean, they do think math sucks.

Very true. So normally I think I would have just eaten it. It doesn't bother me. I am not. I very rarely ever send food back. But this was for a purpose. This was for a reason. So I said, oh, I'm not, I very rarely ever send food back, but this was for a purpose. This is for a reason. So I said, I think, so I said, Oh, I'm so sorry.

You know, like this was an, I don't, maybe she didn't hear double cheeseburger or whatever. She was very nice. And she said, Oh, I'll take it back or whatever. And I do think pretty quickly she came back out and it was very clear. They had quickly like cooked a burger and thrown a piece of cheese on it and just sort of haphazardly laid it on top of the existing cheese. Not that they needed to make a new one, but the presentation, really, there was no time taken to make it sort of look like an organic. Yeah, those cheeses are not relating to anything around.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they're hanging off the side or whatever. And I was like, that's funny. But yeah, they clearly were just like, ah, shit, what? I didn't hear him say it. All right, well, throw it on there. I don't care. Just pick it up, throw it on there, and send it back out.

This is also a bold choice, because chain restaurant patties aren't usually super flavorful, but are usually very thick. Well, they would prove to be very thick as well. But I noticed you didn't jump on the flavorful. Well, here's what I'll say. Here's what I'll say is that as I was eating it, I was like, this tastes good to fine. It was not the best cheeseburger I've ever had, but it's pretty good or whatever.

But the amount of meat is so much. Yeah. I cannot finish. Like, I will feel my heart shut down if I eat all of this. But they did offer the double. That wasn't out of nowhere. They do say make it a double. Yeah, no, I didn't order off menu.

You didn't pull that out of nowhere. Okay, okay. I know the secret menu here. Throw another patty on there. And I don't think the photo does a good job to convey that one of the patties especially was like this thick. What's an inch? Yeah, close. Nearly an inch, yeah.

Probably a little under. But yeah, and then there was like a more normal-sized patty. They were mismatched. Like a lazy dad at a barbecue. Yes, yes. So like, yeah, dad was in the kitchen, and he's like, ah, whatever. And they're like, there's consistency, who cares? And he wouldn't have had to worry because usually you're not stacking them together.

Right. So no one would know that there was a difference. They're on top of each other, you can tell. But I'm eating this and I'm just like, the thing has fallen apart. And now I'm just left with these huge hunks of beef. And I've eaten all the bun i've eaten the vegetables so like whatever lettuce and tomato and it's just there's so much meat that has a little cheese left in it and i'm just like i cannot finish this listen it's gonna go wild for these

photos by the way oh yeah we got oh some of the best ancillary content you're ever gonna see all month long so i just remember going okay even though this i have to stop now i have to not completely finish this because it feels impossible to finish it i don't want to spoil anything about everyone else's but this was what six people i don't think i've ever seen so much food left collectively on a table yes it was shocking waste maybe two to three meals were had among the six does that kind of do it yes so so i will say like okay it was fine i should not have pressed my luck and sent back for the extra patty that was not a good idea i think perhaps if i hadn't done that it would have been a much more pleasurable

finishing experience right right yes a pleasurable finishing experience again in the annals of great mike great things that i said let the record show that fine to good has been the highest praise of food this entire saga we'll see we'll see if we ever get above it and also i asked mike i said who do you think like there's the best and that was the review yeah and that's by the for sure by the way i am the one who liked the meal the best i think i think adam liked his we did not hurt adam that's true but the rest of us that i mean this was the wall like this is the wall we all this is holding his cheeks like he's seen a ghost with a tunnel with a tunnel painted on it and we all just wily coyote did

absolutely yes yeah do you i let's let's stare each other down who do you think i don't really have like a story about mine well that's the question if we're going in ascending horror i think jane and i both ran into the same thing which was um she got like a pasta dish and got no chicken made a vegetarian and she asked like how spicy is that and they're like oh we can put the chili oil on the side and it won't be spicy and we got it and she took a bite and she's like it's really spicy even with the oil on the side and i took a bite i'm like yeah that is pretty spicy so she didn't get very far. Maybe it was read somehow as extra oil. I guess.

But then I ran into a problem. So I ordered jambalaya because I was going to get fish and chips because I didn't really have much of an appetite. And I'm like, oh, that's safe. And then I'm like, oh, that's so much oil. That's so much fried food. And I was like, okay, I'll get jambalaya. What's that? Just rice, chicken, and andouille sausage.

I got it with no shrimp uh because i don't eat shrimp i my family was convinced at a very young age i was allergic to shrimp and i think it was just we went to some shitty restaurants but i've never braved it i've never i've never but i've had every other kind of shellfish. So I'm like, I can probably eat shrimp. But I just still have never. Are you allergic to the Bubba Gump shrimp character? His name I already forget. Scampi? Oh, there you go.

I was going to say, we've talked about it days ago, and I already forget. Jason, if you licked Scampi, would you be OK? Well, there's a lot of grime on Scampi. So I don't know if I would be okay. There's a lot of... Might have nothing to do with the allergies. Yeah, yeah.

Scampi's grime might protect you. Huh? Because you're not touching him. He's so grimy, you know. It might strengthen your tongue. Jason, if you were in a sort of a coital situation with Scampi, would it be okay? An episode what? A coital.

Oh, coital oh yeah if you were in a coital situation with scampi the bubble gump mascot i believe it's a phrase well coital unless there's coital yeah okay yeah Okay. Yeah, I don't know. Would I start having an anaphylactic situation if I was nailing scampi? I don't know. I don't know. Sector keeper has floated away from his chair. He's gotten up from the microphone. He's floated away.

His spirit fulfilled. He's losing strength. Scott, this line of conversation was as unpleasant as my meal turned out to be. So I didn't get the fish and chips. Instead, I got the jambalaya. Is this a y'all question? So, okay. Sorry.

Go on. Sorry. Sorry. I'm back. I'm back. Okay. Okay. I don't want to derail.

Sorry. Go ahead. I got the jambalaya. I took a couple bites and i'm like this is the spiciest goddamn thing i've ever eaten and i have a tolerance for spice jane doesn't like spice i'm a little i like spice my stomach doesn't so i i try to go pretty easy on it. And I've had a fair amount of Cajun Creole food. So I, but I was not prepared for this.

So my mouth is suddenly on fire and now I'm feeling more lightheaded. Oh, right. Oh yes. The light. So, uh, my mouth is on fire.

I'm starting to have heartburn. I'm feeling lightheaded. I believe I'm like having a tough time and i'm like extra vigilant about my health at the time like i am trying to rest and i'm like i don't think i can eat any but like i like eat all maybe like a third of it before i tapped out wow wow yeah you know like not to underline this situation over but this maybe important to note that you were like about a week out from being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis yeah so i know you are hitting your one meal is killing you it's killing me now again i had a few days of

iv steroids i was on the pill steroids so probably giving me a little bit of a cushion on the fall. So I don't think I was in as bad shape. So if you're gonna go to Margaritaville, just take steroids before. Just have a couple pill steroids before. Just get one of those boxes where it's like six the first day

then five, then four, then get MS if you feel like you need to. Prophyl then three. Yeah, get MS if you feel like you need to. Prophylactic steroids. Yeah, so, and make sure to use prophylactic if you are having intimacy with any chain restaurant. You don't know. Any chain restaurant shellfish. Chain restaurant mascots.

Yeah, if any shrimp coitus. Of course, yes, yes. Was the shrimp spicier than Scampi's kiss? I don't know, Sector Keeper. I didn't get the shrimp spicier than Scampi's kiss? I don't know, Sector Keeper. I didn't get the shrimp, but everything was spicy. Did you know he called, he said, I didn't get the shrimp. That's when he's talking about Scampi that way. It's so mean.

No, I didn't get the shrimp in the dish, I'm saying. Right, right. No, he's talking about the dish. The jambalaya was as spicy as I am. And I'm not saying like, oh, it's so spicy. It was like, this is like a dull, unpleasant. It's like when you get a really spicy one at Buffalo

Wild Wings. You eat one and you're like, oh, it's a weird, dull heat. There's no flavor. It's just unpleasant. It's just the burning and not the fun taste. And again, I thought I was being responsible not getting a plate of deep fried food. Yes, but the spice wouldn't have been the issue there. Wow.

So both of you avoiding spice ended up with a lot of spice. Jason, do you think that the ambiance helped or hurt? Do you think it would have been better if you were in a less fun place? It was a little surreal Okay Like the Jimmy Hits Playing As I'm like my head in my hand

Like pounding ice water Cause I'm just like I just want And I had also eaten We had gotten like some appetizers Oh yes We missed those entirely yeah wait we got and i don't have much to say about them you know what in an episode with a lot of negativity i will say

i do not have a lot of complaints about uh the uh lava lava shrimp i stand by it i think that whatever sauce they use chili lime aioli whatever's happening in there yes i like it i look forward to having it again. I agree. The word is spelled conch. How do you actually say this word? Conch? Conch? Yeah, you know what?

That's funny. I would have probably said it the first way, but now that I'm self-conscious about it. I just realized it's one of those that's said different for no fucking reason. This was one of my requests because it's like, oh, you can only get these at some... This is mostly a thing you can get in Florida. Did you like it? I did like it. All right. A lot of carrots in those fritters for some reason.

We got pretzel sticks. You're not a carrot guy? What's that? You're not a carrot guy, Jason? No, I just was confused why there were so many. Oh, just too many carrots. We'll have to see if that's, and I don't even know if they have it. We'll have to see if they have it in Hollywood, if it's a Florida thing.

I did like that. I like pretzel sticks with mustard sauce and house made queso and I liked the chips and guac so actually I forgot the step at appetizer point we're feeling okay then the icy drinks come out and we start having problems and then the main meal we're having a lot of problems

is appetizer point what they call it that's just not a random combo it's one of Jimmy's songs. That's what I was going to say. Sailing to appetizer point. I climbed Mount, I climbed to appetizer point. I stepped in a bottle of artichoke dip.

I'm Mount hungry. I sailed the queso sea. So, all right. So Jason's not looking great. I almost didn't realize where you were at because I do have a video I took going around the table. And I did note that when I got to you, you just put your face in front of, you put your hand in front of your face and said, I don't want to be filmed as in a paparazzi scenario.

Well, I think I was covered in sweat by that point, which was a mix of probably the food and like the last remnants of the heat it was really hot we were stuck in heat for a while um okay i look i don't have a lot to say about my i got fish tacos which i don't really go wrong with most places where i've had good experiences yeah at in margaritaville i think it's usually what i i get there i don't think i've usually paid 21.95 for them but i don't know look we've i started going in 2016 and a lot has happened a lot of inflation and um so anyway it hasn't done me wrong before but they show up and it is just bathing in what is it what's crema crema it is it is taken such a thick luxurious yeah crema bath

it's a lot a lot of white it is yes the picture you're seeing it from afar there's some more white in this photo you can't see fish can you it's like an extra white uh coleslaw you want to strip there's a place in LA called Best Fish Tacos in Ensenada and they give you the cooked tortilla and the fish and you go over and you dress it how you want.

Traditionally, it's one strip of crema, one strip of red sauce, or pineapple salsa. Does that come out of one of those icing tubes? There's a pump, I think, in some places. Pineapple salsa. Does that come out of one of those icing tubes? Do you know what I'm talking about? There's a pump, I think, in some places. But if they make it for you, yeah, usually there's a strip of white sauce,

kind of acts similar to tartar sauce to add a creaminess. Right. I'm also looking at this. The bit of fish that I see towards the end, I don't think it was fried. I don't think they gave me fried. Do you think they were grilled? Because I don't think I would have ordered grilled. Was it blackened or grilled?

The menu only gives you the option, seemingly, for fried. And yet, I think what's poking out, the little bit you can see amidst the sea of white. I think that is a very light beer batter. I don't know. That's extremely light. That looks more to me like blackened from a grill or something. Again, I'm not totally sure. Do you think that he put all... I'm just assuming

there's a man cooking all this stuff that fucked up and was just like, I don't know, throw the white stuff on it and they won't be able to see that it's not fried. Just blind them with white. Yeah. They won't know what hit them.

No, it looks like the blood that comes out of the androids and aliens. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It looks like an android died in the kitchen. Milky blood. And his head fell right next to my plate. And I left a lot. There's so much left on this plate, an entire tortilla because

it's just soggy. That was the after picture? Yes. Entire tortilla I never touched. You're looking at a full plate. It looks better than the one before too. It looks more presentable. Yeah, you understand

what you're looking at. I think Jane and I, at some point in Islands, were like, yeah, kind of fading. Do you want to go back to hotel? Well, let's, I had a little energy.

We need to eat anyway. We'll go to Mark. We almost dodged this bullet. Wow. We almost were like, oh, we're going to eat at the hotel. We may as well eat at Margaritaville, you know?

Well, we also, though, you were a little bit, probably probably cajoled into it because the premise of, let's like, you know, we discussed the possibility that you, Sector Keeper, would assign us having to have the exact meal at two places. And when it was passed down that it would be Margaritaville, it's just that kind of like, of all of the meals for this to happen with. Now this is, and by the way, we're recording this before we know what meal two is like.

We now are going to have to go do this again. What we have just described. And I had totally forgotten. I was like, well, this margarita's never steered me wrong. And then when I was thinking back on trips with my family, I remembered one trip where the first day I met my dad and brother down there, and my dad had basically a tooth dying. Oh, my God. He had a toothache.

Not because of the restaurant. Not because of the restaurant, but he— He made out with Scampi. And he managed. He has an allergic reaction. He got into an emergency dentist appointment the next day, and I think they just gave me antibiotics and painkillers. And they're like, when you get back to New Jersey, you need to go to your regular dentist. So he went to a dentist in Orlando?

Huh? He went to an Orlando or a CityWalk dentist? Yeah, here's the thing. If you were in... Not a CityWalk dentist. Hang on. I know. They're having their first date. I don't think they have a dentist. Islands of Adventure dentist? At the top of the tower.

Menji DDS? Especially in a town like Orlando, there's a whole string of like you go to the front desk or you go to the concierge and go like, I needed a doctor. I needed Dennis. And they're like, all right, call this number and they will put you in touch with someone

who can see you quickly. So he had a miserable meal at Margaritaville. And then another time we were down there, we got caught in the pouring rain and went into margaritaville to eat and he slipped on the water and like fell on his seat and we were all kind of everyone was kind of slipping and like but so i was like oh we had no it was hard rock that had never steered us wrong before we never had a bad meal at hard rock i confused. We didn't go to Hard Rock. We didn't go. You have like a Kaiser Sose moment with Margaritaville. With Margaritaville. It just had never

been me. I had never gotten it before, but I got hit. You're dead. You know, it was fine every time, but I just remember I'm miserable in the Margaritaville. Well, boys boys you're going back yeah great time to find that we have to do this exact thing again and you know what

it's not just us here because as mentioned uh well I believe Jane will be joining us again I'm not making her you're not okay all right never mind all right Jane's out uh all right smart move Jane uh but uh another friend and for some of us, family, will be joining us as we go this very evening as we record this. In fact, we will be joined by the level keeper. But first, we need to get the level keeper's thoughts about his alpha experience. Let's see if we can bring him in now.

Whoa! I know that noise. Boys, boys. He's back. The level keeper is back. The sector keeper disappeared, and the level keeper, I guess you guys can't be in the same space.

No, he's scared away whenever he hears my trademark cowbell. Your thing, we know. Your thing. My thing. I wasn't sure if it really was, but you've proven here that it is. You always have it. It is canon.

It's unavoidable now. Boys, boys, I'm here to haunt you. Much like our Margaritaville meal from months ago still haunts me. Well, yeah, we've been talking about what we had for a while, but we were trying to recall your specific experience level keeper what can you tell us about that that fabled margaritaville one lunch uh well i of course got a grilled chicken sandwich seems like something you can't screw up trying to order the plainest thing i could basically yeah basically the same chain of logic grilled chicken breast

monterey jack cheese applewood smoked bacon, lettuce, sliced tomato, Dijon aioli. Feels like a safe order, right? You would think so, yeah. It sucked! Oh, no. Oh, that will keep you from kidding. Poor physical composition, hard to handle and or bite.

But applewood smoked, that's one of those phrases that means something, isn't it? It's not just some run-of-the-mill bacon. They took applewood. They took wood that was rubbed in apple. Rubbed it with apples and wood. And smoked. And then smoked it.

They didn't just place it on applewood. They smoked it like a cigar. Yeah. My sandwich from memory was both very dry and soaking wet. A conundrum. Which is hard to do. Yeah. That's wild.

How'd your beverage go for you? Well, my beverage got me drunk, which took away some of the pain of the sandwich, which means not bad. You were saying it's like passion fruit. I believe I got the passion fruit guava let me get this right but you so you were between two drinks somehow it didn't leave enough of an impression to remember forever fruit guava cocktail 500 calories which was margarita paradise passion fruit and silver tequilas, Guava Puree, and Homemade Sweet and Sour.

It also came with seemingly 27 maraschino cherries. And those are big, wide-brimmed glasses, so it's like a little cherry jacuzzi. No, it was just in a straight-up cup. God, it wasn't even a fun- No, nothing fun. It was a glass, right? But it did definitely dull the pain of the meal well that's good okay maybe that's the idea is like well look margaritas in the name yeah that's

the point of it and they won't even notice what they're eating my memory is that i felt so defeated after the meal that i went back to my hotel and did not even attempt to enter the theme parks again for the rest of the day that's right we did not see you at any point after that that was the end of our contact with you so that means that you were but then you were stranded and you couldn't like by not coming back you didn't get to come back and enjoy the greatest spot for dining city walk you must have been helpless without it yeah well i decided let me see if i can make the Margaritaville meal feel better in retrospect by putting it up against an unworthy competitor. So I went to the quote unquote tiki bar at the Hilton Garden Inn, Orlando International Drive, which is a hut. That's pretty good, though.

Near the pool. Yeah. Theming. Where I was regaled with such theming as a drunk guy yelling the n-word oh god and everyone else sitting around the bar casually talking about how much they like trump no way you kept this secret from us until now level keeper and i ate a 20 chicken quesadilla that seemingly was prepared in a microwave, and it was unquestionably better than my chicken sandwich at Margaritaville. It really hit the spot. Oh, wow.

Wow. Oh, damning. What a review. You've damned it with the cowbell of shame. The ambiance does sound worse for the quesadilla, though. All I'm saying is that everything was stacked against the quesadilla. I see what you're saying. Yeah, environment.

Yes, that horrible, horrible thing is happening as opposed to a fun volcano demonstration. Correct. Right. And yet, if you're judging purely food and you didn't end up feeling sicker, you were improved by the end of the day as opposed to- I gained new life. Well, that's good to hear. Well, and we're just glad that we could like get you in here find out about

that experience and then i because you will also be joining us as we repeat the meal margaritaville for margaritaville omega you didn't know what you had had gotten yourself into um double or nothing from margaritaville los angeles. The pressure is truly on. And I also don't mean to corner you here, but I feel like a little bit of business has come up. We've talked about you before. Sector Keeper said good things about you. Okay.

And as you know, people in your family are kind of... We haven't gotten a good sense of... The Keepers don't seem like a good bunch. But he said you're like... He likes you. He, he likes you. He gets along with you. Pretty rude thing to say. Could you imagine if I said the Gairdners don't seem like a good bunch?

It's just from stories I've heard. Weird thing to say to someone's ghost face. I can point out the ends of the family that I don't feel the best about. It's just like they've taken advantage of him and his lottery winnings, and it doesn't seem like you have. But also, something's up though mike do you know what i'm talking about i do but i think i think of where you're headed is there's a resolution that has already happened off mike with me oh yeah yeah i found i found the shirt if is that what you're talking about yeah yeah i've i've been yeah are you going where has that

all been going oh i was gonna i found i thought you had my City Walk shirt, Level Keeper, that you wore during the live show. You thought I had stolen it? Well, I didn't know if it was stolen or taken accidentally. This is okay, because when the sector keeper was saying the Level Keeper's a good guy, I like him, Mike said, I don't know, I'm not so sure. And you're...

Wait, so we're finding out now... I have the shirt. I'm not so sure. And just wait. So we're finding out now. I have the shirt. You did. Jesus Christ. Was it just in another suitcase pocket? It was actually in a drawer. It was in a drawer. Okay.

I'm like tarred and feathered on a bunch of episodes that are already. Not a bunch. Two, I think. No, not a bunch. Two too many, if you ask me. Not a bunch. One. And it was a brief comment.

Mike deserves the bell of shame. Give him the a brief comment. Mike deserves the bell of shame. Give him the bell of shame. Give him the bell of shame. Oh, Mike. How dare you judge him? We were told explicitly he's one of the good keepers. I know. I'm sorry to say that about your family.

I wasn't definite about his stealing of the shirt. I said it's possible. Also, I want to say a little backhanded, a little loaded to say one of the good ones. I don't love your line. I know, I feel like some of the people you were at the bar with. I'm just saying, some of these keepers they've been taking advantage of our friend.

Has he been taking advantage of us in turn by crashing at our homes? Possibly. A little bit, yes. I don't know. I'm confused about the entire... You've got a complicated family. That's all I'm saying. Yeah, I ask you to judge me as my own ghost boy. All right, well, I'll try to.

You're right, because I had a good time seeing the movie with you. Thank you. I had a good time at Margaritaville 1, even though it didn't give us a good time. I have my highest hopes for round two. I think it's going to be better? The best meal ever!

Yay! All right, bye, Level Keeper. we'll see you on the omega sector all right well okay and he's gone i guess can you guys it's weird that he popped in and then you just you disappeared that's right yeah yeah yeah you guys can't be is it just maybe too much like time cop rules yeah what do you remember wait what like time cop rules. Do you remember? Wait, what are time cop rules? Not to put you on the spot. No, no. It's just like if Van Damme touches himself I think both Van Dammes die. Oh, they can't touch

each other. Wow. Yeah, yeah. So it's just easier that way. It makes sense. They couldn't kiss. No, no. Two scampis can't kiss either. Oh, wow. Scampis have time cop rules. Yeah, Scampis do. But of course, any of us could and should kiss Scampi. Yeah, right.

Unless you got an allergy. Yeah. And if you do, remember, you kiss one Scampi, that's Scampi Alpha, and then you have to kiss another Scampi, which is Scampi Omega. Because there's multiple Scampis. That's one of those leveling things out in the multiverse, keeping things even keeled. So not a great experience for the level keeper either. Let me add a couple dimensions to that.

Yeah, no. I know you had to teleport out, but no, of course. Yeah, what do you think? It wasn't good. And also, wait, so that means you didn't hear that this whole time. You know, Mike's been accusing your cousin of stealing his shirt. And then we found out when we talked to him. Mike had this shirt the whole time.

What, the airbrush shirt? Yeah, I found it. Where was it? It was like deep in a drawer. I actually had put it away. Your shirt was with your other shirts? You don't say. Deep in a drawer.

Described like a gun. Fish way in there. Way in there where my secrets i have really deep drawers just like you wouldn't even like you can picture it but you're actually not picturing it less deep deep yeah that's what people like i like listening to the show i've never met mike is he a nice guy he yeah but he's got some deep drawers got some deep drawers um so anyway uh your cousin's being disparaged. A lot's happening here. Let me just add a little bit of aftermath.

Because the meal, I leave the meal not feeling great. Also, this is really where it's becoming clear my voice is just ravaged. Some of your guys are, too. And I don't even know why. We're just all, you know, the day before had been a very exhaustive. That's our Epcot food and wine day. So everybody's like and and the park is closed that whole thing is happening so we're just like it was a breaking point it was the wall

as as jason said yeah um i especially at the what like let me just take a bathroom break and maybe just kind of like splash a little water on my face coa and then at that exact moment because non-stop jimmy buffett music is playing i hear some familiar notes and i hear uh his cover of my very favorite beach boys song sail on sailor i didn't know that he did sail on sailor oh okay let's hear out his version i'm sorry i know he passed away this is dog shit he fucking like drenched everything that i like out of the song. The live version is more about being there, okay? It's not necessarily that he's hitting the notes.

I would have liked that the singing was way worse and the instrumentation was more simple. He had a tendency to yell things instead of singing them when it was live, but that's for the crowd that's there. He might have been legally mandated to record it because it had the word sale in it. Not once, but twice. The Beach Boys fell into that too. They started to be like because it had the word sale in it not once but

twice the beach boys fell into that too they started to be like if it's got summer in it we have to do it that's the only way we continue so that adds to the nausea for me um uh you know the jammed parks it's crazy and then some then i then i take the the water taxi home and And I'm worn down. I know that I'm just going straight up to the bedroom. And I get up there. I just black out curtains. I'm in the dark. I just need to be in the dark for a while here on a day where we have theme park tickets and it's 4 p.m. But I start feeling a little lonely in this moment

because I did this trip solo. I'm in the hotel room solo. There was some thought given to, you know, my son's still young. He's three. I don't think we were going to bring him necessarily. But we did think like, you know, we're going to go have a lot of fun in Orlando.

Maybe Erin, my wife, should join. Maybe she'd want to join. And there was some consideration given to that and we talked about like and she was like you know what i'd like to do is come for your guys live show uh and and just do universal she didn't even want to set foot at disney just do like a mini trip just do a couple uh um and then once she heard once i started laying out just how much city walk was going to be part of this she baileded out. Never mind. I will stay at home. And at that point, when she decided not to, I'm like, boy, well, I'm going to go have this big fun vacation without her.

And she's just going to be, I feel so bad. She's going to be just stuck doing all the parenting while I'm off across the country having the theme park time of my life. Cut to the day that would have been her universal day where the only thing she really wanted to do was our beloved et adventure she would not have been able to do it until maybe the very very end of the day because it was shut down due to some water pipe breaking so that would have been fucked made all the so glad she didn't come then i'm again the premise being uh i'm gonna be having all the theme park fun and she's stuck parenting.

Instead, she's like, I'm going to go have the best time that I can have. I'll take them to Knott's. We'll see how that goes. Knott's had just instituted an incredibly generous, very cost-effective annual pass. The cheapest annual pass you're going to find anywhere in theme parkdom. So she activates that, goes and uses it. So basically, I'm alone in the hotel room and I'm like, I got chicken with a family.

I'm missing the family right now. Maybe, you know, she, she'll probably tell me like, Oh, you know, he wasn't sleeping and I'm exhausted.

That'll make me feel like, all right. Instead, she says, we're at knots. We're having a glorious day. It could not be going better. The chicken dinner restaurant was a huge hit.

He ate all the fries. He's got a big smile on his face. Now we're going to go hit some rides. And she sends me photos where he's beaming. For the first time ever, he's doing rides by himself. There's little rides that an adult can't go on. And he wasn't brave enough last time I went to Knott's. Now he's in the little Red Baron plane, the biggest smile I've ever seen.

Just a glow. Then he's on a little truck ride. He's in the little red Baron plane, the biggest smile I've ever seen. Just a glow. Then he's on a little truck ride. He's in the truck by himself. He's so excited, honking the horn. This ride is now gone. They've taken it away. Whatever the little truck ride was has been removed since this happened. I can never have this experience watching him in a little truck again because I am across the country in a darkened room,

having eaten one of the worst meals of my life, which was also one of the most expensive meals of my life. All the theme park fun is across the country. And at this point, once the text exchange has happened, I try to take a little nap, and I realize that I cannot do this. What I need to do is get up, go to the bathroom, and throw up. And I throw up

a little bit of this food. It's not an explosive throw up. Again, it was a very watery drink. I cannot blame this on drinking. I'm not a person who throws up very often. I don't do it from drinking. It's been many years. I don't do it from just food ever. And it happened.

This was not necessarily food poisoning. It was just a scenario of my body doesn't want this to be in me anymore. So here I am throwing up in the dark while my family is having the time of their lives across the nation. What you're describing is

a very casual vomiting. Which I feel is interesting. It's honestly and I haven't done this in a long time, it's akin to a puke and Yeah. Which I feel is interesting. Just a bit. It's honestly, and I haven't done this in a long time, it's akin to a puking rally. Because I did rally. We went and had more fun.

We did go on E.T. Adventure. You and I had a little bit more fun that evening. It's a laid back barf. Yeah, yeah. Buffet style. Just like, yeah, I'm puking.

Quick little puke. Mike, am I remembering correctly, did you eat this meal and then go on the velocicoaster yeah oh my god well that proves you had the best experience food wise remotely able to do that i because i was even i was going through my my phone here just like after i took the photos from margaritaville and i was like oh yeah what did I do? I mean, I'm in Port Aventry. I'm just, like, taking photos in Atun Lagoon. I'm just loving, like, seeing Gasoline Alley and taking the gasoline smell in my nose. God.

So, like, yeah, it was a little bit of a heavy meal. But I was on, like, cloud nine compared to everyone else. You came back to life. We blacked out for a couple hours. And we also were in a hotel room with two queens. So we were each, each like stretched out in our own bed like do not touch me and they knew the name of the person who worked at the desk there at the at the hotel as well he knew um oh my god i'm now i'm blanking on her name no who worked at

the um the restaurant oh okay so she was you always learn the name of somebody at a hotel. And shout them out on the podcast like they're listening. This one was... Sally, love ya. Thanks for the towel, Sally. She would always say hi to us. She was always offering us water and drinks, and she's like, oh,

the boat to Sapphire Falls is busy. Take the boat to Royal Pacific and just take the footpath next to it and it's about the same amount of time and if you hit the Margaritaville you've gone too far Margaritaville next to one of the side entrances to

City Walk there is a security gate right there how can anyone how can you even be thinking of any of this now how are your spirits high enough to talk about and it's a hop skip and a jump away from i'm fucking i'm at my lowest i'm at my lowest of low i don't have some nice lady at the hotel taking care of me give me water my loves are across the country i am in the dark i'm in the i'm in the dark as i recall this having little pukes having little pukes and they aren't as easygoing

as Jimmy makes them out to be with his famous song Easygoing Puke. The Duke of Puke, they called Jimmy Buffett. I wish I was as chill as the Duke of Puke. I should have brought

the Tums and Pepto I travel with. Next time I'll be prepared. Sector Keeper, will you allow me to ask a question about Toon Lagoon real quick? Yes, of course, of course.

I feel like your food sacrifices have given you a little bit of wiggle room. Okay, great. What is this? There's like a little kiosk that sells beer and snacks, but it says at the top, Ale to the Chief. Do we know what this is? Was there a comic strip called Ale to the Chief? No, is that like a Hagar called ale to the chief no is that

like a hagar the horrible nod might that's what i'm wondering that's why i'm asking the question does it have a viking helmet on there this is something you think the sector keeper might know no i'm just i i don't want to get in trouble for going out of the bounds of city walk that's why i'm asking it right so ale to the chief but it just it's like a little hand that looks like beetle bailey's hand or something holding a big beer mug. And then it says down here, slurp and snack or ale to the chief. And I'm realizing now, what is that from? What is ale to the chief?

I think it just kind of sounds like a little gentle play on words. Flush. Sounds like one. Yeah, you know. Jason is determining that it is nothing. It is not from anything. It says Jay Ward on the website. Somehow it has something to do with Rocky and Bullwinkle.

Maybe it was like one of those fables or something. One of those other side characters. Okay. Well, we'll do a whole episode on it, but I just wanted to know if anyone knew the answer off the bat. Does it look presidential like that? Well, I mean, obviously that's the reference, but it just has a picture of a guy holding a hand.

But the building doesn't look... Looks like a shack. Yeah, a shack. This to me, this illustrates, here I am beaten down, and then Jason's saying, and it's right by the side entrance, and here Mike's saying, and then to the chief, what's that about? I don't know how you guys are able to maintain...

Well, he was feeling like shit, but he rebounded quickly to being like, this illustrates how it goes. I get down. I stay down. You guys bounce back up higher than before. You're going to be back at this Margaritaville. There's no way you guys don't go back to it. We went at a wrong time.

This is what happened. It's not an institutional thing. We just had opened. Obviously, the B squad was working. You guys ordered wrong at a Margaritaville. happened it's not an institutional we just had opened obviously the b squad was working and you guys the last great meal you had in a margarita how great is the food in hollywood the hollywood food is okay i've never had a bad meal sector keeper hear that he said okay in fact yesterday was the anniversary of us going to the hollywood one i got a facebook memory the anniversary of it

when which one the first time we went? I believe so. As a group. Jason and I went before because we went to the opening in Sajami Play there, which we'll talk about on the other episode. But yes, I'll find the picture real quick. Haven't you already talked about that? You have to talk about that again?

There's no way that wasn't talked about before. I don't have to talk about it. There's no way that wasn't talked about eight times or more. Maybe it's 2017. And the fan club from san diego yes see you know it was i guarantee this has been discussed once if not twice if not eight times i didn't say it hadn't been discussed a little bit i'm just saying like for the true episode about the one in hollywood look certainly an important piece of knowledge piece of information okay so to get the full context crucial um all right well look we have to do that we still have to do that and tonight after having heard now you've heard what meals we've had yeah listeners now we have to go have

these again the same meals the same meals correct this is what we have backed ourselves into of all the place sector keeper i know it's an interesting experiment. Could this not have been Vivo Italian Kitchen? Could this not have been Antojitos? I'm sorry, boys. If those had alphas and omegas, but potentially. Wait, Antojitos made me sick too. What am I talking about?

All of these places are not good. So, you know, even if they did, even if they did. No, you have to. I sorry it's just something about the all right though what the state there's time jumps and there's there's flash points yeah yeah you know it's yeah it'll all make sense alpha is the omega omega is the alpha and we're just for beta well that's true oh yeah no that that is correct okay well so i guess now listeners can get in their own flash point and all they have to do is go to the second gate patreon.com slash podcast the ride where right now they can hear about this exact same meal

occurring at the Hollywood location. Should we get this? We should probably. Oh, yeah, yeah. Wait, do you see it, Sector Keeper? Do you see the Sector Stone? Is it coming? Oh, my gosh.

Look at it. The Sector Stone's forming. It's a third patty with cheese. Oh, wow. Wow. Wow. My cheese is still in the wrapper. Yes, wow. Wow. Mike's cheese is still in the wrapper. Yes, look at that.

It's not even just thrown on it. It's still in its plastic wrapper. Wow. You can ask for it paper style. It's a little Jimmy special. So make sure you have that on the secret menu. Yeah. Hey, well, that's, you know, know look by the time people are hearing this you have

turned up this pirate is looking at 40 you have looked at 40 and it makes sense you as you age you get more and more patties maybe your 40s are the time to start having that third patty third well i tried third pat i think it's four time for four sure there were a couple years when i was 14 i had three oh you've already done three. You would do three? Well, McDonald's used to have a triple cheeseburger on the menu. Wow. And I did it a couple of times because I assumed, you know, you have to eat more.

I believe they're bringing back the, well, what's called the Grand Mac for a little while, but like an XL Big Mac. I think it's already back. Ugh. What was that noise? I just, I don't like a ton of meat on it. Don't have thin patties, though. Everyone's doing the Smash Burgers.

Now place their stack in the Smash Burgers, so you end up with a giant thing of meat. They are? What do you mean? I keep seeing that. Now they're stacking the Smash Burgers. I see double Smash Burgers on the menu. But Big Mac already has two patties on it already.

Yeah, I like that one. I don't like the quarter pounder patty. That's ridiculous. Cut to Jason having this burger he's complaining about tomorrow. Mike having it three times this week. It making you sick every time. Next week you both go back and do it again. This is guaranteed.

I know we can still shape what's happening in the multiverse, but certain things we know. Certain things can't be diverted from. Well, the infinite symbol. The infinite symbol that Jason and I ride on. You're riding a Mobius strip of shitty food. Well, we got to go ride it tonight, so let's get out of here.

We have to go do it, but listeners, you can go hear it right now. Go to the Patreon. Besides that, you survived this sector. Thanks to Aaron Gardner for the art our own mike carlson and zacharino for the theme music uh and now please head to the second gate to check out the matching meal at city walk margaritaville jimmy buffett's margaritaville city walk hollywood aka omega yes a.k.a. Omega. Yes. Forever Dog. This has been a Forever Dog production.

Executive produced by Mike Carlson, Jason Sheridan, Scott Gairdner, Brett Boehm, Joe Cilio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts,

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