Podcast: The Ride - Unlocked: TODAY Cafe

Episode Date: May 31, 2024

Enjoy this sample of P:TR - The Second Gate. Find even more Second Gate episodes at Patreon.com/PodcastTheRide We take a look at Universal Orlando's TODAY Show themed restaurant. That is all that happens. This is a normal episode. FOLLOW PODCAST: THE RIDE: https://twitter.com/PodcastTheRide https://www.instagram.com/podcasttheride BUY PODCAST: THE RIDE MERCH: https://www.teepublic.com/stores/podcast-the-ride PODCAST THE RIDE IS A FOREVER DOG PODCAST https://foreverdogpodcasts.com/podcasts/podcast-the-ride Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forever! Dog! 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 Welcome to Podcast The Ride, the second gate, thankfully avoiding a third full humiliating month of neglecting to cover Al Roker's butternut squash tart. I'm Scott Gairdner, Mike Carlson grimacing at the thought that a single day would have passed longer where we don't discuss this tart. I was just thinking about how I deserve to be punished more I mean we I guess all three of us but I just like I want to Take it out of myself too I want to take this

You think you deserve to be punished more Yeah more huh more For what per se does anything Come to mind for not getting to it oh just for Oh I thought like maybe for things in general Well I have Things that yeah I have certainly just have just general Guilt but no I'm sorry.

I mean, specifically for this, for the neglect. This is, well, I don't know. I don't wish the same thing. I hope there's no more punishments coming your way anytime soon. Don't do that to yourself. Jason Sheridan, hi. Hi, yeah.

I mean, I was ready to discuss it the last time we were down, but then I didn't end up eating anything there, so it's probably for the best we didn't. But the menu has changed. It changes all the time. Avocado toast is gone.

It's long gone. Overnight oats left behind in 2019. Is that right? I thought they had it still. Is there not overnight oats? I feel like i didn't see it i definitely didn't see al's uh avocado toast no well that shifted as i was saying to al's butternut squash tart which is the new thing from a couple months ago and again if that had gone any longer i think the listeners would have started to notice and started to to complain

and revolt but we're here we're doing now. We're talking about the Today Cafe, which is the Today Show themed restaurant in Universal Orlando. And look, we've just, you know, we're back from Orlando and we're filled with like a, it's a December here. It's a Santa's bag full of goodies

of the rides and attractions and experiences, really keyword experience that now we can talk about that we haven't been able to for for a long time and folks it's here the one you've been begging for the one you've been asking for we're finally doing uh the uh the today's cafe and i'm sorry the overnight oats are still there but the acai bowl appears to be missing in action oh Oh, gee. Possibly replaced with tropical chia pudding. Okay, okay.

Oh, wow. Well, this gives you, I think, a flavor of the kind of things they have. You know, these earthy, balanced, good-for-you recipes that certainly are real and well-crafted by the artisans who work in this theme park. Doesn't it make you feel like overnight oats especially

feels like the fakest like what you picture it is versus the container that it is taken out of and put in the microwave yeah it's they it's a everything sounds classy everything sounds curated and handcrafted yeah but But there's very few quick service places in any theme park where things are truly handcrafted. Like handcrafted in front of you. I suppose pastries and certain things are made in. Right, right. But I saw the chef without Roker

touring the facility at opening. Well, you know, again, all restaurants have that stretch of time where people are watching and paying attention. So they have to be decent impressions of restaurants. And then time passes and things kind of fade, which I imagine is a theme that we will be exploring in the CityWalk Orlando Saga Multiverse of Madness. No spoilers! No spoilers!

When were these restaurants good you might want to chart that opening and then look like a month out and how long ago in the past was that yeah we will see you know speaking of that it is okay so you know we're going to be covering that nbc sports grill of course uh which is at city walk orlando there and then you've got uh of course the so there's an nbc property and restaurant you know the the spirit of the sports uh casters and sports enterprise and then you got jimmy fallon up the road and obviously the the recreation of 30 rock that's the biggest scale nod to the corporate overlords and then you've got this so in this in kind of a same little loop if you want to like really

keep that nbc spirit alive in the most in the vaguest way all three probably places where you can get things that say nbc or you can get like a i bet all these places have something just called like nbc pie does that reflect is it like is it based on to anybody who works there come up with the pie recipe i don't know um but if you know if you're loyal to a brand then uh universal's got the way for you to celebrate that yeah no it's it's really i mean maybe this is for the end but like what like what else what else would you want from nbc like the nbc property what other if you're a fan of the network i mean is there famous nbc stuff do you want like brandon tartikoff walk around characters like what like this is i guess probably the optimum way right now that an average tourist would experience

the ip of nbc i said yeah well that's obviously what i want i want if you know like like a cigarette uh you know machine or whatever but then you actually get to it and there's kind of like a no no no and it's brandon tardikoff with the cast to say by the bell all saying think twice before you do that yeah the greatest thing they ever aired yeah i think uh enough has been enough i think it's time to bring cigarette machines even if they're fake out cigarette machines yeah they're fake out even if you pull on it and it tells you it's just like your favorite embassy mbc property telling you right right yes no no the cast of manifest is here to tell you about the dangers of smoking which i, right. I'm saying that has shifted to Netflix.

That's one of those shows that's secretly a massive hit for Netflix, I think. Sure, sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God! What? What's happening? What? You absolute fool!

He found you! Mikey, how did he find us in a different location? It's the Minotaur! There's no way for him to know the Minotaur found us oh well thank you so much yes

hello I guess I should help you with the mic you know what I didn't plan for I didn't know you were coming Minotaur oh my god the Minotaur who recently visited us at Dynasty Typewriter is back has rudely interrupted the Today Cafe. But ultimately, I put this on mic, I would say. You have to know you're the reason this is coming.

I assume so, but let's hear him out. We'll hear later, Gary. You know what I'll do? Maybe, Vinitar, why don't you take my microphone and I'll go grab that one on a stand that's set up in the corner. Here, here, here. Come switch to mine. Okay. All right, one second.

Let me get settled in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. Well, yeah, I don't want you to podcast uncomfortably oh it's gonna get it's gonna get uncomfortable oh my god what have i done okay okay minotaur levels i have to audio engineer my own yelling at my My scolding. Oh, God. Can we do it while we're going live? I might have to restart and restart. Oh, my

God. I think you're a bad son, but you're a fine engineer. You'll figure this out. I know what this is about. Some of us actually had food we liked at the Tag Cafe, and we have to talk about it, but we have to address this. This is important. We have to address our son's death. This is important, but... Ultimately, you have to blame Mike it, but we have to address this. We have to address our sudden guess.

This is important, but... Ultimately, you have to blame Mike for what's happening. Well, I do for most things. Minotaur, do you want a bottle of water while you're getting settled? That is really polite. I would love a bottle of water. Thank you. Hold on, I gotta restart.

Hold on, it's telling me to stop. Minotaur's really settled in here. Okay, yeah, you got a water, you're all good to go. I got to restart. Hold on. It's telling me to stop. Minotaur's really settled in here. Okay, yeah. You got to water. You're all good to go. It's not aggressive. Less aggressive posture. You got to stay hydrated so you don't pop the peas, you know?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're not always. And being a Minotaur is a very thirsty job. Generally, you got to bellow. It's a bellowing job. I can only imagine. Yeah. Is he at right bellowing distance from the microphone?

I think it's okay. I can serve you. From over here, how does that sound? Oh, it sounds fine now, yeah. Bellow right in your face. How would that sound? That's a little too hot. I guess I'll lower in case you want to have that room.

I mean, that's probably what you should be doing, because I think I have a feeling why you're here, Benatar, why you've showed up by surprise. Does this have anything to do with what happened the last time we saw you at our live show? Yeah, I thought I came to your show, I had a great time,

a lovely time at the Dynasty Typewriter, a beautiful venue, by the way. Thank you. We agree, yeah. No, no, no, yeah, yeah, really comfortable,

good snacks. Did you get some of those at some of that popcorn back today? I got some sour gummy worms, that's a really good snack, some like peanut butter M&Ms is great.

You mix them together. Unorthodox topic. It's kind of, you know, kind of like nice fun treats like they would have at the today cafe but i know but i guess we have to put that aside for the time being um okay so um i think i know what's happening um and to catch the listener up on what's been going on uh a little while back mike uh would would not face the minotaur in an escape room experience you had to tap out of this thing yes and that led to the Minotaur in an escape room experience.

You had to tap out of this thing. Yes. And that led to the Minotaur appearing in one of our recent live shows where he put you to the test. He made you face one of your biggest fears, which is the fear of missing out on great deals. Yes. Or something that's a limited time release that might go away. I looked really open to interpretation i let you yes pick what would work for you yes and yet and yet once a specific was offered yeah

once you were given and look this all played out on stage as it did and you were a champion that night public record yeah you were told to delete one of the many many many home screen notifications that are on your phone that's true at all times and you picked one you had one in the chamber ready to go you volunteer and sacrificed something called deal vibes yes at deal vibes yes a name that's kept you up at night ever since minotaur yes well i want to read a little i want to read an x that came across my bow i don't even have x i quit x okay you had to go back on it because of all this crap people people were dming me on instagram and i had to get on x because i was gonna go full threads and all that's aside somebody told me go on x and i read this from michael carlson at fat carlspin spelled

ph replying to pockets right deal vibes you guys plug your show and all this stuff yeah and he's he writes i refollowed to spit in the face of the minotaur i will not be bullied i will defeat it in person oh ho ho and then you refollowed deal vibes yeah and now we're in person that's true my face right here. What up, dog? Okay, well, look, when I said I would defeat in person, I assumed it would lead to another episode where I went to the Minotaur 2 escape room, which I learned is real.

Oh, he's living in the past. He's thinking about your escape room. That's just not about the escape room anymore. Now you're in an escape room. First of all, let me just say this. I realized weeks, days days i don't even really remember i realized what i was doing i deal vibes is so important to my phone ecosystem yes that i said there's no fucking way i can unfollow this i'm following this again well

this is my question wait a little bit more context really quick the uh you unfollow you you you volunteered unfollowing you all we said was home screen notifications. You took that off, and then as an extra brave boy bonus, you said, and I will unfollow it as well. You got a big round of applause. Minotaur called you the bravest boy he's ever known. Yes, he did, yes. It was a victorious moment.

I gave you paternal approval, an intimate moment of paternal approval. That's right, yes. And I appreciated that. His biggest desire. I appreciated that, but then I was thinking about it, and I was like, who is this Minotaur?

I don't even, I'm just a man on a stage trying to do a little show and make the people laugh, make the nice people laugh. I just, because I had an anxiety attack, I didn't face the Minotaur once,

and I said, you know what, who is he to tell me who and what to do? And I said, because I had an anxiety attack, I didn't face the Minotaur once. And I said, you know what? Who is he to tell me who and what to do? And I said, I can't. And then I refollowed Deal Vibes. And yeah, I almost immediately was clued in that the new expansion pack for Disney's Lorkana was now available for like five minutes. I got a booster box because I refollowed and it justified all of my decisions.

You got an Lorkana box? Lorkana Floodborne booster box. That refollowed and it justified all of my decisions now i have that arcana box lorcona floodborne booster box that's actually pretty amazing 24 packs this is hard to get folks you're tipping him a little bit i have a question we can how soon did you refog because there were two weeks between us recording the live show yeah and then we put out the episode and I want to shout out listener Ethan Dickinson. Thanks for getting on the crime tip line. Well, he's now banned from listening to the show. Stop unless you're out.

If you're on the Patreon, you're going to be blocked. If you're on X, you'll be blocked from our accounts, personal accounts. You're calling out Ethan. Ethan, you get one free trip to the labyrinth. If you ever want to come to my labyrinth, you can come and check out the labyrinth. It's really cool. It's got a lot of phases.

It's got a lot of like justice based puzzles. Okay. It's going to be great. Are you going to like eat them or kill them at the end? Yes. If I do catch you, I will eat you or kill you. That's kind of my job there. I guard the treasure, but there is treasure there's Ethan.

So you could, you could be treasure if you're a brave boy. Yeah. Look, Ethan, I mean, you're much more loyal to the Minotaur than me. So I think this is where. I guess he picked a side, didn't he? Yeah, he picked a side. I get it. I understand.

Something that I want to know from what Ethan found out. There were exactly two weeks to the day between when we recorded it and when he discovered that you were still following D.O. Vibes. Yeah. How soon after the show did you spit in the minotaur's face i actually don't i think it was like four or five days i think i made it four or five days and then i think it pops up a little better i wondered if you eddie even like like the night

of we're in the venue and decided eh fuck it let's do it you know what happened while i was sitting backstage eating peanut butter and bonanza you would do that secretly on your phone during the show you know what happened is i think that x then started showing me deal vibes as well because what happens is it doesn't always go to just who you're following oftentimes it clicks over to the for you tab which then shows you an algorithm of what you actually might want to see so i think i was getting deal vibes and i was just i was i got theOMO. I got the deal vibes FOMO. But that's what you were trying to do. That's what you had to overcome.

No, I understand that. I went back on my word. But really, who's a minotaur to tell me what to do? Well, okay. Well, first of all, who are you to sit there and back out on a deal that you made and you hugged on? I mean, if Jason would have made a deal like that, he wouldn't have reneged on it at all. He would have stayed in full tilt.

I would have never done something like that. I would have never reneged. It would have kept me up at night if I re-followed. Just like the person who mentioned me and some other accounts in a post, an ex, and they were like, hey, there's a deal on five pounds of Hershey's syrup. Oh, yeah, that's right. I was trying to find that. We were just tagged on a deal vibes,

which could be a good way to suss out how much of a real problem we're dealing with, because you're right. Jason, did you get the chocolate, by the way? The syrup? Syrup, the syrup, by the way? The syrup? Syrup. The syrup, yeah. No, no.

I don't think I had the room for five to ten pounds of Hershey's syrup. It's over seven pounds. Over seven pounds. Hershey's chocolate syrup for under ten dollars. It was too low and ten was too high. Are you a Hershey's on the Sunday guy? Do you like it even at home for a home ice cream? Do you do it Sunday?

I usually have something for a home ice cream. I love to do a Hershey's syrup, but then you just stir it really fast. Yeah, yeah. I don't mind if it melts a little. It's getting ice cream soup pretty quickly. You know? I love that. You don't just feast on the bones of those who betrayed you.

You like it just a good treat like any of us. No, but you should try bone ice cream. If you've never made bone, you can home make it. It just takes milk and ice and everything into the bones of your enemies. Oh, sure. So it's like a bone broth, honestly. It's almost like when you're making bone broth at home,

which is very popular these days, and it takes a while, but instead of using it to make some sort of a broth, it's a... I feel like Salt and Straw would have a bone broth ice cream. I think you could probably get one seasonally. I'm betting. Jason, what do you think? I almost would bet five real dollars i bet it would be good

i bet it'd be good yeah yeah but it was jason's an honorable man is what i'm saying well okay let me i hate to bring out contract law into this conversation but let me just read a little mighty minotaur let's just read let's just read I deal with riddles all the time as well. Occasionally and elaborate, there'll be a riddle. So I'll listen to this contract riddle he has. Oh, this sovereign citizen Carlson going off again. Listen, this is corporatefinanceinstitute.com, a website we all know very well.

And it says, in contract law, duresses uses a form of defense to a crime where the defendant uses threats to force the plaintiff to commit a crime that is against their wishes a party who is forced into an act or contract under duress can rescind the contract rendering it null and void well can i counter with that all right were you under duress just because i'm a minotaur no because this is how i talk and this is how i look and all of a sudden if i'm asking to do something it's duress well i would say that the way you were intimidating me on stage by charging the stage we didn't

we have to approve everyone i charge everywhere i go i charge to the movies i charge to the grocery store i charge that's how i do you so you I do. So you're incapable of not charging. How did I come in here? You charged in. But it's very intimidating. And we heard a little charge. What was that? And he showed up.

After we took a little break because some nice people were walking through town in the alleyway. Yes. You almost really messed up that intro. Using a residential computer intro there was an energy there was an energy going on here that i couldn't put my finger on it was weird and then the dogs walked by and then

i was like wait a minute that's and then i said no no no start recording again yeah there was a weird weird energy not that i thought it was a minotaur approaching necessarily i just something was off scott say something was recording again i was like i never yelled at me. Why was this dog's on the duress?

For some reason. See, that's what I'm saying. I was not doing anything. I was just nonchalantly hiding behind a fence outside of the recording studio, and these people just stopped. They were under duress just by me being there. A minotaur with horns and large sound, and I charged up to the fence. I believe

that you could not charge. I believe you have the ability to the fence. I believe that you could not charge. I believe you have the ability not to charge. I believe that you could be slower in your gate to not charge. There's also, I think that, you know, there's like a range of, of intonation and how something sounds in your head versus how it comes off in reality.

How you presented yourself to us during the show, what ended up being duress might have been very calm right on your scale similar to how there's a story i'm trying to remember one of us i can't remember it was uh use this phrase in a text message counterpoint you were wrong yeah yeah also sounded like a very like kind of an angry especially angry sharp threat but once uh pestered to say it out loud it was said more like the at her point you were wrong I thought it was very clear communication that sounds like some of that clear text counterpoint to comedy it was her comma there I was a call as a colon yeah looks like the title of the show yeah

so that's like that's like something you would text and you would you'd be shocked if anybody took that as like that seemed like it was like. Exactly. I'm just being a minotaur. I'm just doing minotaur things. I don't know what your big deal is. No one's blaming you for just doing minotaur things. It's just tests and feats and riddles. It's just how I deal. It's how I deal, man. And intimidation and loud

voices and getting in a person's face. I have been whispering the whole time in my mind. Well, there you go i come off now whispering because that's i'm trying not to wake up the neighborhood your whisper is a little loud it's a little loud yeah i'm not but i'm not hey over here i'm not mad at you about that the other chairs might be i don't know they might say they're under duress right now i'm a bit yes i do feel like i'm a bit under duress right now. All right. Well, let me bring it down. I'm going to give you a paternal feeling, intimate paternal disappointment.

Okay. Michael Carlson, you are a bad little boy. You followed deal vibes when you said you would keep off of it. And for that, I am sad. You are not brave. Looks like a knife. It cuts like a knife, but it's like, unfortunately, it's a Minotaur. Not Optimus Prime.

But you did stand up to a Minotaur. One of the scariest beasts there is. And you told him that you would defeat him. And you would spit in his face and as a minotaur i respect that wow you charged onto twitter and you charged right up to me and for that you are a brave little boy oh my god whoa all the way back around wow geez yes you're breaking even to me which i would count as a victory, honestly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think

maybe we landed at like a spot of peace. I guess the question though is, how do we feel about Mike continuing to follow deal vibes? At this point, is this his own business? You've got kind of a respect for him given how he's behaved lately. Well, I told

him he'd face his greatest fear, which would be to miss out, and he didn't face that fear. I feel like that's a fear for him to conquer in the future. However, he did conquer the fear of a Minotaur, which is pretty good. You know, I think that, I don't know, I can't believe you got Arcana cards for real.

Those are impossible to find. And they're the new expansion. It's called Floodborn. That's the new title for the little Arcana. Do do you collect arcana do you actually play it i haven't played it yet but i do collect it it's it's a game to play right that's right yeah and you haven't played it never hmm this is convexing you now now you don't know what to do but it's a collectible card game yes i yeah i know but it's like we don't collect magic cards and not play magic some people do that's foolish that's yeah that's baloney some people do no way that's true toys he doesn't take out of the box you're trying to play with yeah i get that like there was more in the box but it's a card game it's not clay it's not baseball cards

i would like to play it hopefully Hopefully I will play it soon. Would you ever play your old man? Wait, are you calling me yourself my old man? I mean, I'm kind of everybody's old man. I'm an ageless creature of myth. All of our lineage ultimately goes back to this Minotaur. You've been around thousands of years. We're related to you.

Somehow. I'm guessing. I'll have to curate like I'll have to create a deck because you don't have'll have to curate like i'll have to create a deck because you don't have any more connor card i would have to create a deck for you i've been wanting to play well yeah you're not following deal labs now that he's on x he's jumping the air now come on well and you're gonna want to you know because i started thinking about what am i missing out on not following deal vibes myself? And, you know, this is the kind of thing that's on the table for Mike, and it could be for you as well, Minotaur.

You could get deals on Lightning McQueen Crocs. You can get a deal on Grimace from McDonald's Crocs. You could get a deal on Will Ferrell Elf Crocs. Yeah, a lot of crocs on there what's the deal like on those Grimace crocs those are new I don't think there's a deal I don't think there's a deal on those I think those are just sort of like telling you

it's a limited edition I think so I actually can't tell you that one elf crocs and again this is in the past listeners as you're hearing it $59.99 with code save 15. But I think the links to I'm not going to say the link out loud. You kind of got to follow deal vibes to get it.

We're getting closer. I mean, I'm not specifically against deal vibes necessarily. No, no. Just that you said you had quit it. You did that. That was the real issue. We should say also, I think we're kind of getting to be a little bit friendly with deal vibes as a result of all this because they got tagged in all everything that was going on

and they you know they were tagged in mike issuing a a grave threat about spitting in the face of the minotaur yeah so they're seeing all this whoever deal vibes is and they posted this may be my first even good publicity is bad publicity moment and then a picture of thor that says i have no idea what's going on and i tried to explain well we're a podcast about theme parks and a minotaur made one of our hosts mike delete one of his many home screen notifications and he chose you deal vibes but immediately we followed you to get more deals on meatballs and now the minotaur is mad um but i guess that's not up to date anymore it seems like now what's happened is so deal vibes if you're listening if you are on like a fair trade oh yeah we fight if we all follow deal vibes together he should be paying for our patreon i agree yeah

we're helping spread his deals i have gotten texts and messages from people in the wake of all this saying i started following deal vibes and i got some good stuff do you know do you know what anybody called out as something that they got from deal vibes oh i should i should look uh somebody there was something like really maybe a cheap couch on target that somebody tweeted at me they got like a brutally cheap maybe like was a glitch like it wouldn't last for like one move but it's you know you can sit on it no i think it was just like somebody made an error writing the price into the target website and they bought it for like 50 bucks or something come on i think i mean i saw a deal for 100 feet of perforated

bubble wrap for only 13 which is a 49 value seems good that's pretty good you never have bubble wrap when you need it you just moved you know yeah you could use this and then it's it lingers around and then i throw it out and then the next day or two of course i need it that'd be fun to charge on imagine charging on a hundred feet of bubble wrap my my hooves just hitting it just so satisfying if they feel that good on fingers i can only imagine on hooves oh you could uh in front of the show i Ian Riccoboni, texted me Saturday, November 4th. Not for nothing, I got a fucking steal on the new Mario via QVC due to deal vibes, by the way. Mario, I wonder how much was it for?

I think it was $30. $30, that's pretty good. Oh, pretty good. Pretty good deal, sure. Here, let me also just add a little more. Please. Context for what's going on here. In my mind, I said, let me follow follow deal vibes unfollow when the show comes out and then follow it a week later

and forgot wow you knew you were gonna get caught well i thought i didn't know i was gonna get caught but i thought to myself well i could follow deal vibes surely for a few days then unfollow when the show comes out if anyone wants to search and snitch on me. And look, things get in the way. You forget sometimes. So somewhere in the run of being a parent to a very young child, doing three separate gates worth of theme park podcast content, and again, having 200 home screen notifications flooding into your phone at all times,

you forgot to do an unfollow. I forgot to unfollow again as well to avoid this nasty business from even happening. Look where we are. I feel like I can put this to bed. I think we just have one game of Arcana to the death. All right, fine. But you did hear that last part, right? To the death?

Yes. I mean, I generally deal things to the death. If you've got my labyrinth, I'll either kill you or you get the treasure. And the treasure does... If you do get the treasure, I end up dying. I perish. Will you make bone broth ice cream out of me if I lose? Oh, absolutely.

You have great bones. Ah, do you think so? You've got tall bones. You think tall bones... You can make a meatier ice cream. Flavorful? You think tall means flavorful? Well, it's like when you make noodles,

you really got to knead the bread and spread it out. Same thing with bones. Short little bones, they're compact and they're still filled with a lot of marrow. Your long bones have stretched out, and so the marrow is kind of kneaded in. Do you think that sort of how

things that I do that keep me kind of youthful in spirit also help keep my bones fresh like like when i'm listening to young person's music and stuff like which i do often what's the young person's music do you like steely dan or no no no no no like olivia rodrigo's guts which he listens to for a long time but now he has heard the full album i've heard the full album since she's like 20 she's a young person and I'm listening to music as if I'm just sort of a peer of hers. So would you think that's sort of spirit? Just a friend hanging out with Olivia at a party?

Yeah, it's just a kind of a cool friend who looks like a tiny bit older, but barely. Barely. You wouldn't even know. We all tread the boards. We're all but performers on a stage. That's right. Who's this character that entered the show? I just love the theater. It's this character that entered the show? I just love the theater.

It's just me. You're saying that because Mike is a fellow performer with Olivia Rodrigo. There's some kinship. There's camaraderie. So you're saying that anyone who does anything on a stage should be able to get along. Like I should be best friends with Jim Brewer. Well, that's that's true you have all the same values yeah you have the same beliefs because we think all

the same things so sure yeah by the way i don't i don't like jim brewer not for his current stuff current stuff's kind of interesting but for his old stuff when he plays goat boy that's kind of oh yeah it's kind of not cool to like play a hoove creature when you're not hoved it's kind of like problematic it's a little weird it's just like not hooved. It's kind of like... Problematic for you. It's a little weird. It's just like, I don't know. It's like, we're not jokes. We exist.

And I... Yeah. We get it. It's the 90s. I get it. I know, but don't cut him a break just for that. He should be... And he is where he is.

Now he's in right-wing country. If you see any or hear any like minotaur comedy on a podcast you should pounce and make sure it never happens again i'll charge right in it's not happening in my book don't ever participate in it you guys first was like i i heard like oh there's like a minotaur thing that happened on the podcast and i go back and listen and i you know i when i go back into the backlog i only you know i admit I only listen to like the Big Right episodes but like a lot of people do that yeah

a lot of people do that well I'm not I'm not gonna go in and like watch listen to like you know like David Copperfield although I did listen

to that particular one but that's like the one I normally wouldn't listen to well that's the whole reason then we lure you in to kind of the more niche topics

which you know to that end and I don't mean to cut any of this off but we do look we you picked a hell of a one to walk into

we've been looking forward to doing the today cafe a lot and at some point we're gonna have to get back to the business of covering the it's a restaurant based on the the today show oh that sounds great where's that exit that's it that's in it's in universal florida like the original one they don't have it here they don't have it in hollywood oh you'd have to go to florida for that but but you were saying you kind of only like big rides and stuff. I mean, does today's cafe feel too niche to you or something? I mean, it's like the biggest television show in the history of television. Like, really, if you think about it.

It's long running, yeah. It's been on for quite a while, and the building is notable as it used to host the Beverly Hills Boulangerie, which was there since opening day. Oh, wow, Jason got a fact in this. 29 years. 20, 30, something like 29 years it was an opening day but the first restaurant when you walk into any park it is pretty common it's kind of generic they're gonna get people hungry for breakfast sure but this is kind of a step up because it's

a it's now that's kind of some cool nbc synergy in effect i guess my question is do you want to like we owe the listener getting back to the today cafe they've all been begging and pleading yeah probably tweeting at us uh angrily that we aren't really i really did plan to like come in here like gore mike with my horns and leave i wasn't gonna take up all your time i really swear to god i was like really planning on just a quick murder and gone but oh wow but now that you've decided like you know be proud of him for a second i thought maybe we were gonna like fight a little bit he's still good i was originally gonna do like a punch challenge where we take turns punching each other okay that doesn't seem as fun honestly well how about this when i let's talk a little about the today cafe sure minutes are feel free

to hang out and participate yeah absolutely yeah you're a guest on the show at this point i feel friendly enough with you hang out talk about today cafe we got a lot of great al roker stuff to talk about yeah yeah and then if you guys want to fight it out a little bit while i do like the plugs at the end maybe uh then that's up to you guys by the way is one of the few people that got through my labyrinth he made that's how he got the job that was his treasure. That was what he, that was the test that he had to pass to be like a guy who's on television forever.

They killed so many local weathermen trying to figure out who, you know, could take over the Today Show. And Al Roker just went right through. He's smart. You don't think about a labyrinth. You just see the end

and you go around and get lost, right? And then Minotaur comes, kills you. He went right up and over the walls. So resilient. Oh, he just scaled it, which is probably, you're probably like waiting for, right? And then Minotaur comes and kills you. He went right up and over the walls. So resilient. Oh, he just scaled it, which is probably, you're probably like waiting for, why don't more people do that? That's the smart way to do it.

Yeah, I think it's cheating, but like cheating is like part of how you get out of a labyrinth. That's smart. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Deal vibes just, I got an alert. 12 pack of Monster Energy Java Nitro Cold Brew, only $6 after sub and save coupon on page at Amazon. So Jason, what do you think of that? Monster Energy Java. I don't uh patronize the monster brand i'm not a big energy drink guy but what

if you added the coffee to it yeah i'm interested in the coffee wait is that the kind of thing you would drink no then why do you need to know that or see that well just because they're gonna they're gonna really like cast the net very wide when it comes to deals so i'm just i'm bound to like something the fact that you also sorry to cut you off minotaur uh but the fact that you you not only refollowed you also turned the home screen notifications back the entire premise of the thing went away in four days i forgot what the specific premise was it was refer to his only home screen notification no i know now i remember now but you that's two steps you had to remember to go back and turn on a little green dial on your phone well that's the thing you're not going to get the deals unless you

do it this is the trick this is what people don't know and i shouldn't even reveal it because then i'm going to lose out on in the next expansion pack for lorcona because they're not getting the alerts directly sent to their home screen and you might miss it they might be sold out of uh limited edition marvel and uh lucky charms collab loki charms imagine if you had to go through life not having a box of loki charms yeah which are mischievously delicious that's exclusive exclusive to Walmart.com, I think. You knew that? Yeah, I knew about Lucky Shards. Oh my god. You pulled that out that that's a

Walmart exclusive. I haven't even opened my box of Carmella Creeper yet. I finished the Monster Mash. You have a Carmella Creeper button open? I have a Carmella Creeper at home. That's going to be like a collector's edition, I think. Yeah, oh, maybe. Collector's item. Oh, we're not going to get into collecting cereal boxes. Is that a hobby now?

People do it. I don't do it. People do it. Somewhere, must have. We'll see. Well, I'm sure people are going to start some collections of Today Show mugs, because that's one of the things they have at the Today. Oh, yeah.

They have the very kind of mug that the hosts of the show drink and the whole thing uh we weren't even into the premise whatsoever it's kind of a recreation of uh studio one a where the show comes from so if you ever wanted to visit where they at where the magic happens where savannah and hoda and al uh entertain and wake up america each morn that's what you get to do right towards the entrance of the park at universal orlando so what but today's show is like what's the iconic thing is the big glass window wall right that's the is that the thing of the state is that recreated in this cafe it's not giant i'll tell you that and i know you'd be looking for giant especially but i'll pull i'll throw it to. And I know you'd be looking for giant especially, but I'll pull,

I'll throw it to what Jason said. You brought up the, what it was originally Beverly Hills boulangerie. And I saw pictures of that establishment and I thought it was very closed off and a little like not as warm as it could be, not as vibrant as it can. And they, and I would say that the today show cap,

the today cafe, not the today show cafe. I know. I keep wanting to say that. I know. the today cafe not the today show cafe i know i keep wanting to say that i know i know well here mana you raise a hoof uh to make sure next time we do it to make sure don't let us say the wrong thing you gotta respect the cafe today cafe well let's respect the rhyme is really what it is look there's very few the beverly hills boulangerie just open with the rest of the park today cafe open with a taping of al roker was down there

during a remote he went down the receiving line of all your favorite universal friends oh i've been trying to find the video of jimmy fallon doing this i know we talked about that on the patreon oh yeah he does a big high five line because i'm pretty sure he must have high-fived the bunny from hop who's voiced by rus Brand. It's something everybody wants to be seen doing. Wait, what year was this open? What year is that line in there? This is 2019. 2019?

Because this is, Today Cafe is new. Yeah, yeah. It's very new, yeah. I guess we could have gone there last time we were there, but we only did it, we were just in Orlando. Oh, I did. That's when you were there, yeah. I was there first, and I was just kind of waiting, eating my Clif Bar I brought from elsewhere.

All right. So your Today Cafe tip is eat somewhere else and use their chairs. Well, I mean, I'm saying that's what I did. But this time I made up for it. I bought, as you do, a 1030 AM cannoli and wolfed that down. We've been having more meals together recently i think with traveling and prepping for the travel i think i've seen you get dessert at every single one of them i don't think i've seen you well cup reporter has to do the legwork and he's on vacation yeah

no but i'm thinking of no waffle restaurant but watching you eat just like a fruit compote waffle as your lunch not long ago. Oh, really? It was a place with waffle in the name. Yes, that's the try the waffle. It was like, oh, fresh strawberries. That would be nice. Can I ask you about your morning cannoli?

Did you get a coffee with it? Did you dip the cannoli in the coffee? I didn't. I had already had coffee that day. Oh, see, that's the fact. I would do a morning cannoli and I would dip it in the coffee, and some of the cream inside the cannoli would get in the coffee. That sounds good.

That sounds like a nice. Well, and imagine having that with the penguins from Madagascar, Al Rooker, and Ian Fulaminians. Oh, that would be lovely. Wow, wow. Wow. All our favorites. Yeah.

I did somewhat of a high-five line. I was in Universal Studios Osaka every once in a while I get to travel. Oh, yeah, yeah. Nice. And I have my travel bag, because I was going to be in Osaka for a little bit. I have my travel bag in the lockers. They have lockers at the front, out at Universal CityWalk, kind of like right when you go to the entrance.

And I found one in the back, back corner, because I had everything in there I was very nervous about losing in. And I was leaving the park, because I had to catch a train and i pulled my bag out and i and i hear this music and it's like celebrate good times come on and a blind i'm not joking 30 minions walked around the corner 30 like in costume and they were and they were very much walking like they were like not on shift they were walking not like minions and then because they thought they were alone at this point of the park then they saw me and they had to start acting like minions and i was just into it so i started high-fiving them and they just didn't stop coming and i high-fived every minion wow it was an incredible experience what a dream magic i'll

never forget yeah that is awesome that's so cool wow and and the loopiness of that you're on the other side of the way i mean i assume your base is kind of more i don't know where you live exactly kind of the california the labyrinth right yeah there's probably this labyrinthian parts that can take you like burrow under the world sure yeah you can get from place to place many different places in the labyrinth yeah that's nice that makes travel pretty easy it takes a while but it's so convenient if you know know where you're going but not everybody does Sure sure Just get a real fast Charge going That means that you Have been to Or at least maybe

Just you must have Might have had to Charge right through it But CityWalk Osaka Yes I did go to CityWalk Osaka You're a rare person Rare or rare

Being I guess We've had on the show Who's been to CityWalk Osaka I don't want to Skip ahead Because we still Have to deal with

Orlando We've got our work Cut out for us Orlando wise Anything interesting Notable you noticed in city walk who's been at uh city walk osaka city walk osaka no never no one here has so there is a store at the very beginning of of it and i don't know what's around i went in 2019 uh there's a store that's like like america cowboy store like i think it's like called called Western America or something like that. And you walk in and it's all American kitschy stuff

and cowboy things and American flags. And it's like a cowboy store. And they have an arcade shoot-em-up game. You draw a pilgrim game. And it was really amazing. But then what's almost more surreal besides that is just seeing a Bubba Gump shrimp in Osaka seems wrong. So if we ever were to do the City Walk Japan Saga, we would have to once again be back.

Yes, if. When. When. When. We gotta go. We will once again have to handle Bubba Gump. There's a Bubba? The third time, maybe more, depending on, I don't know where else we're going to go.

I believe there's also a TGI Fridays. I believe so. I mean, I think there's a conventional, everything, there's a few conventional restaurants. Yeah. A TGI Friday is a Bubba Gump and a, gosh. Tokyo Dome City is a Bubba Gump and a TGI. Does it really? I thought so.

Maybe, I'm not sure. I got to go back and look at Look at my photos And see but Yeah You know what I think that Universal Japan Still has This restaurant

Beverly Hills Boulangerie I think because It was just one of their Like They probably recreated The kind of generic Hollywood Beverly Hills Like opening area

Yeah So I think they And probably the Today Show Means nothing to them So they don't have Today Cafe But you might have Passed right by

That Beverly Hills Boulangerie The thing we've been Talking about How about that? Wow That would be incredible I just didn't even know Like two ships in the night

Something we didn't know About or care about Until Cultural exchanges Clammy club sandwiches On the other side Of the world To our Japanese Brothers and sisters um well what's

some other stuff about this place uh well all right so you had you had a canola how did you how'd you feel about that canola uh i thought it was good yeah i thought it was pretty solid jane really liked the uh breakfast sandwich on everything croissant uh egg now oh go ahead sorry egg cheese smashed avocado divinia tomatoes which divinia tomato i looked it up it's just roasted tomatoes on everything bagel seasoning croissant served with side of fruit uh she did that without the sausage but she had high marks for that i'm gonna confuse you a little here because do you remember what that was called by any by any chance was it just like uh oh that was just breakfast sandwich everything croissant here's a weird thing that they do uh at at this place and maybe this this almost in a way mirrors the kind of bizarre politics and infighting that we know about uh from the today show over the

years you started saying that uh sandwich recipe i'm like that sounds familiar because i looked that up because i watched a segment from a couple years ago where that was called savannah's dream croissant sandwich and now it's just called breakfast sandwich every yeah what happened why was savannah guthrie stripped of her sandwich title what's very odd because she's kind of i would would say, the rock of the Today Show. Like, I used to catch 20, 30 minutes of the Today Show when I was getting ready for my old job. And I was like, oh, I like Savannah Guthrie. She's, like, personable and normal and has weathered all the storms of the Today Show.

Her and Al Roker and later in the day, Hoda and Kathy Lee. Kathy Lee, I believe, is retired at this point. I don't think she's there. She's not there anymore. She's not there. I know that. And Jenna Bush. Jenna Bush is there. Jenna Bush Hager. George W. Bush's daughter. The party girl. Yeah, the party

girl. She's not partying anymore. I know. She's all grown up now. She's all grown up. And she's got some things anymore I know she's all grown up she's all grown up and she's got some things to say about international events unfortunately no no no does she?

yeah why doesn't she get away with more that she just went by Jenna Hager why does she have to like you still carry the book I mean I get it it's how she got the job

but it's also like you don't have to you know like day to day I've seen is so great anymore yeah yeah yeah although as time goes by we all forget we start forgiving the bushes everyone pretends being happy with their performances on the third hour of the today show um i like i'm sort of endeared though weirdly to jenna bush from her pre-hager uh when because she is in

there's all these have i ever talked in the show before about the the videos that they made uh for the white house dog barney the bush dog barney oh maybe they made every year they this is the kind of thing that's like this is fucking toast and trump era no i'm not making little oh yeah dog videos but every year they made a different thing where george w bush had to like act with his dog and like you got big responsibility barnett we got to clear out all we got to get this tree going i get that tinsel up and she jenna was the worst actor in the entire thing by leaps and bounds like yes barney oh you are excited for another

classic holiday around the white house and she's looking every which way. She does not know how to be on camera, just screaming. I can't believe that she is a daily television personality from her beginning. I mean, she has come a long way. Although I wish she was still as funny and cruddy as she was in the Barney holiday video. Well, they do. First off, today's show is like what four hours four hours yeah that's so like occasionally like we learned recently uh about

you know copperfield based events and it's like oh carson daly pops in and does hosting on the today show that's true you seemed very shocked by that i feel like you had never heard that carson daly was a host i Today Show. I knew they kept him on contract, but it didn't dawn on me. I had seen him host other NBC stuff after his show ended, but it didn't dawn on me.

He's on New Year's right now. Is he permanent New Year's, right? I'm not sure of the status of the permanence of his hosting duties. I'm not sure of any. Well, but Seacrest, there's Andy Cohen, I'm not sure the status of the permanence of his hosting duties. I'm not sure of any. Is anyone? Well, but I mean, there's Seacrest. There's Andy Cohen.

There's I don't know who's permanent and who's not. I don't know. I think he's been on New Year's. I'm not sure. We haven't seen the contracts. I can't speak to how permanent it is. It's not Carson Daly's rockin' New Year's Eve. No, it's still Dick Clark's rockin'.

Dick Clark has it in his ironclad contract that it's still called Dick Clark's Rockin' New Year's Eve. Wow. For some stupid reason. A minotaur level of seeing these things through, following the letter of the law. You feel like Dick Clark would charge back up here if he ever saw that name come off the thing. If Dick Clark is in Hades right now, talk to my dad, Zeus. He will get you back on the show. He can get you back. Dick Clark will. You might have a bullhead,us he will get you back on the show he can get you back dick clark

will have a bullhead but he could get you back there will be his hand goes right through hollywood forever cemetery lawn as soon as they get rid of that name he's coming fucking back oh that'd be the baby the biggest ratings you've ever seen we'd finally be excited about new year's again zombie dick clark introducing uh megan trainer olivia rodriguez rodrigo he knows that he mike has finished you didn't you didn't stop at the first half of her last name by the way did you know that did you know that young people are back on in sync in sync is now popular among young people again well they reunited and they have a song about the trolls the trolls movie

yeah they did hot ones they were on hot ones I was I saw a group of kids all like 15, 16, 17 and they were they had windows down

they were blasting an NSYNC song wow and they were just like they were like this is great like a classic one yeah like one of the

Tearing Up My Heart okay one of those like ones I think it would have been much stranger if they were blasting the new one. The Trolls? Yeah.

Maybe they're Trolls soundtrack fans. Well, it's like us when we were young, cool high schoolers and we had the windows down with a CD of Sha Na Na playing.

The big Sha Na Na revival of the 90s. Yeah, big Sha Na Na revival was part of the revivals in the 90s, 2000s. Did you eat or drink anything at the Today Cafe? I had a coffee.

How was it? Fine. Exclusive roast of coffee at the Today Cafe. How was the roast? Was it a dark, light? It felt like it was a medium roast. Medium roast. It didn't feel like it was too...

Pretty solid. Middle of the road, yeah. But, I mean, they put a lot of creamer in there, so it's kind of of just you know we got a pre-made so you don't you don't take your coffee black no i do i do of course you don't is that a insult against my man and my manhood caramel drops or whatever the hell you pointed at oh karma i don't have caramel drops but i do yeah i could i could drink it black though oh okay okay i could do it we don't all drink our coffee have our our baked goods with like a squeeze of ocular jelly oh i just i just i just chew the beans and yeah like grease the ocular jelly right on an eye and spit in there you know whatever you want but you know that's how i have it um now sure there's the there's the food which is all kind of like um the sandwiches are all

like new york seems like the idea here the carnegie platter and the big apple cheese platter the bulls and the bears platter is that because of the sketch? Why? Or is it because of a bull market? I was going to say, I bet that thing is a market. I believe it's a market thing. And I know I go to the Today Show for all my financial suggestions. And Kramer's off, you know. Because he's pretty sharp.

Jim Kramer. Does Jim Kramer host a New Year's Eve event? Do we know? Oh, just yelling? Yeah, the CNBC New Year's. Well, I think he was one of those people hiding in the Bernie Sanders talking in the primaries. I think Jim Cramer, and he was one of the guys scared.

He was about to get his head lopped off. That's right. Yeah, that's right. I'm glad he's okay. Yeah. Yeah. This is so embarrassing because of who I am, but I actually could never tell the difference between a bull and a bear market.

Which one's good? Which one's bad? I don't think we're the people to ask. I don't know. I know the answer. I think if you know how to play them, they're both advantageous. Well, that's true. That's right.

He's right about that. But bull is good. Bull is when everything's going up. On the rise. Bear is when everything's going down. It's bearing down that makes sense yeah yeah i like that i think that's cool well because you're sort of bull like you're there i'm half bull not like bullish bull i'm bullish which is what they say about the market it's bullish or bearish it's right yeah um and i'm you know i've been bullish on the episode i think since you i mean

as much i like i'm glad i i thought it was going to be a packed one but now that i've heard you know like that we're kind of talking about like the coffee was fine the cannoli was fine it's almost like maybe this kind of was one where there was some room to to chat with a minotaur for a little bit i'm sure but i know people want to hear about the today show cafe so start at night 2019 yes yeah you're right let's make sure we get our facts say yay it would open in may uh I'm sure, but I know people want to hear about the Today Show Cafe. It's a start at night, 2019. Yes, yeah, you're right. Well, let's make sure we get our facts. Yeah, it would open in May.

The opening ceremony with Al Roker. I mean, like, the thing that we got to give a little love to before we wind it down, unless anybody had big, did you guys have like special guests that are going to come into the garage? Well. We're crowded out now by what's happened. Randy Runyon's great-grandson happens to be around the corner and I'm waiting for him to

show up because he's going to put on his great-grandfather's choco outfit and run in here, but I guess, I don't know, maybe we're a little too packed. We don't have time for it. Young Sheldon was hanging out in his car and I texted him. I was like, hey man, it's getting too packed, this one. Got a bum in Sheldon.

If you want to just meet me at In-N-Out Burger, I'll be there soon. I just got canceled, though. He must be so bummed. Young Sheldon got canceled? Yeah, yeah. For the show. The show, not him. The show.

Oh, okay. I don't know. He's great. He's a great guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Young Sheldon is fine. The show is canceled. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The old kind of canceled. Yeah, no. He's great. Young Sheldon's up some. He should have been. Great guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Young Sheldon is fine. The show is canceled. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The old kind of canceled. Yeah, yeah. But let's talk for a second about the thing I mentioned at the beginning, which is, so a couple months ago, Minotaur, they introduced, as I was saying, they kind of shift these hosts around. They like, all right,

Savannah has an everything croissant one day, and then her name's not on it the next day it's like they're trying to keep these hosts on their toes when she in this very segment brought up to al don't you have an avocado toast he said uh kind of rushing through it like oh i think they took that off one or two years ago and so like what is this why are they uh hiring and retiring hosts in terms of sandwich ownership? Good question. Because Al has a different item, but she doesn't.

Yeah. Yeah, she wasn't given the opportunity, no. It was originally opened with, like, the marketing of, like, and a lot of these are Al Roker's recipes. Because he's written a lot of cookbooks over the years. Okay. More healthy. He did keto for a while right lost a bunch of weight doing that uh so i think there are some healthier things on the menu it is funny they lay with that marketing of like it's al ret as recipes and it's healthy uh there are a lot of sweets on the menu. Yeah, it's so much. There's a lot of junk. Confetti cake.

Yeah, but there's confetti cake. It's a cafe. You do want some sweets with your coffee. You're at a theme park. You're having fun. I believe they used to. I almost got it. I think last time I was there,

they had like, oh, chicken biscuit sliders. I was like, oh, that sounds good. And then it said grilled chicken. Oh, grilled? Oh, grilled. And I was like, like oh grill the chicken at the bar it's usually pretty gross very can i say something about grilled chicken though in general because i feel like health wise if we could have just gotten away from chicken nuggets and gotten more towards pieces of grilled chicken i feel like maybe we like i don't always want a fried thing is really what

i'm saying you go to a state fair you go to any almost any fast food restaurant you're not often even given the option to not have like a fried piece of chicken if we just had grilled chicken on the menu you could even have like little tenders and you could dip the grilled chicken in some sauce and you get your flavor that way but i just feel like it's usually under seasoned or dried out but that's incorrect i also think your premise is strange i was at a restaurant last night where there was the full gamut of options it's rare to see fast food restaurant it was not a fat oh you're talking about that's what i'm talking about yeah food isn't gonna why are you going to fast food for grilled chicken because i once in a while if you need to eat something late or or or quick you know you don't necessarily want

the worst thing you could possibly eat but don't you think you'd be immediately complaining about how crappy the grill would be bad but the sauce would make it taste better because the sauces are always very good that's true i was the sauce counteract the the healthiness of the to some degree it does but at least the fried at least you're not getting the fried stuff okay but i think the fried stuff easier to make in big portions and usually more consistent. I tried the blackened chicken sandwich at Popeye's and it was nasty. Your point is, think about a fried thing. It's frozen.

It's easier to do. I understand. It's juicy. Even if it's on a heat lamp. Well, it's easier to do, but also because it's easier to do and it also tastes better when it's bad a heat lamp well it's easier to do but also because it's easy well it's easier to do and it also tastes better when it's bad yeah yeah that's also an issue with it i'm just saying once in a while if i'm like trying to get something quick it would be nice at a mcdonald's they don't mcdonald's even have like an option for a grilled chicken sandwich you can't even get that it would

suck grilled chicken there you go but it all is bad all of the fast food is well i would eat the whole thing but i know for you guys you wouldn't want to eat it with even a little bit of pink in there and then you'd have a teenager making it be bad well you like it with yeah no your way of chicken preparation is like feathered beaked alive feathered beaked alive stuck to the neck of one of my victims that i bite that guy's head off with the chicken inside of it and then the chicken it. And then the chicken is in your stomach alive for at least an hour. Making sounds. Oh, yeah.

Very large screaming and agony. The juices, yeah. Before you can listen to hear the juices destroying it, your stomach acid destroying the chicken. That's right. And I assume you get some sort of arousal from hearing the chicken dying. All right. No, hold on. Don't talk about my sexual dispersion.

Well, you're an evil creature. Obviously, like, you're getting off. You're getting off on me. You're a minotaur. Oh, my God. You're getting on Mike, everyone. You're getting your rocks off. Maybe we won't be trimming anything out conveniently.

You're getting your fucking rocks off hearing a chicken scream. You won't even recognize us as sexual creatures but you're king well hang on i'm okay with certain boundaries but uh yeah well do jason eats chicken mcnuggets he gets his rocks off too it's the same fucking thing do not on mic bring up that jason gets aroused when eating chicken mcnuggets that actually is the time the dipping sauce is still a lot of the heavy left. He made a special homemade dipping sauce.

They come in a little tube. Yeah, there's Mambo and Sweet and Spicy Jam right now. They will charge you extra for that. What do you think about that? What do you think about Mambo and Sweet and Spicy? Mambo's very good. I didn't try the Sweet and Spicy Jam because I heard it's just jam. But I like the Sweet and Spicy Jam more than the Mambo.

I do. I don't think it spicy jam more than the Mambo. I do. I don't think it's a great execution of Mambo. It's the regional D.C. sauce on a lot of stuff. Is that right? I'm not familiar with it. I don't know anything that's like an analog to it. But let me tell you about sweet and spicy jam. You get a sausage, egg, and cheese McGriddle.

You take that sweet and spicy jam. You put it on top of there. A little bit sweet with the spice that sausage patty it is a good good breakfast. That sounds good. It sounds good.

Yeah. Or even just a sweet and spicy jam on a plain hash brown that crunch and the sweet and spicy jam I highly recommend it. Yeah. I hear that.

You're running this down my mouth. I know you're a big fast food guy. Are you the only member for the one time a year I go to McDonald's? And then I regret it immediately. You love the YouTube channels where it's someone eating the new fast food items in their cars.

Oh, God. Luke, are you watching? It doesn't sound sad. Are you watching my new guy, Luke Foods? I know. I watch. This is a new guy, Luke Foods, and he just tried Indian food for the first time a couple weeks ago and it was going viral. You saw Luke Foods, okay.

Oh, I saw the Indian food, the guy in the shirt and tie. He was really sweet. He was in Nintendo Land the other day, yesterday. Oh, wow. He's really making a thing of it. What did he think of that food? I haven't watched it, actually. I just saw he was there. If I go to Nintendo Land first time,

what's the number one thing I should eat besides toad uh some food from home before you get there i like the little cake that looks like the uh green like hills you yeah that's pretty cute a little tears yeah it's cute and there's a little flag that goes in i'd say do dessert but then you would be shocked by the level of rigmarole of what it takes to get a cute little dessert. Yeah, you have to have a reservation. A toadstool cafe. Unless that's not the case anymore. I don't know.

It was when I was there in November. It's still insane there? All these months later? There's still the ad hoc website set up with reservations i thought that was a mistake it was the shadiest website that a theme park has sent me to and that includes go.com i live in a labyrinth and i'm scared to go to nintendo land i'm like worried i'm gonna be stuck in a line and i'm gonna be like oh this room is too much a home you know what i mean yeah i hear you yeah even yeah yeah you, you live in a labyrinth, and yet I think that the Genie Plus Lightning Lane situation

might confound you as much as me. Not to mention, brand new ride. They could have engineered it any way they wanted to. Apparently, it doesn't fit Minotaur-sized people. Ah, yes. On a video game where Donkey Kong and Bowser can be in a cart, it's unbelievable that a Minotaur couldn't fit there. And unlock incredible powers with their size and heft.

You can get going so fast if you're one of them. You do the quick turn. A lot of acceleration. Yeah, but they wouldn't even be allowed. Wario would be turned away. Listen, I can understand the Harry Potter ride being not Minotaur-sized people, but life of pets? Come on.

What are you doing? That's a flippant dark ride you can't fit on that they could have made that any way they want to it's like they could have done it yeah one mile an hour you know feels like they just have it against minotaurs and people the size of minotaurs to be honest like they literally could do it any way they want to that's how they chose sorry i'm out of my hobby horse no i understand what you mean yeah this is your yeah our guests get to express any theme park opinions they have and i'm glad you're you're here and then you have a bunch that you've been to osaka one thing that i think you'd be but that ride was wouldn't really do it for you because part of the novelty is like you see yourself on a screen

and it's like you're a little animal you're a little puppy but you're already half right i don't want to get anything wrong oh yeah half an ass so just filling in that extra half wouldn't be that fun for you i'd be okay because i would be one third bull one third human one third puppy i think that's kind of cute i think that'd be kind of fun and then you get adopted at the end oh really oh yeah that's what happened thanks for selling me out a ride i can't go sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm trying to tell you keep stepping in it my god um let me go back to what i was saying a little while ago which is that um they they they trade these hosts in and out in a very cruel fashion but sometimes they throw them a bone

and al an al roker gets to rise back to the top and have a new item now i don't know if anybody in our group tried al roker's butternut squash tart so i can't really speak to that um i'm going on a little bit of a tangent here um because i'm going to show a video from when he debuted al's butternut squash tart um they sent al down to orlando to talk about um not just the tart i guess they thought the tart wouldn't fill an entire segment. So they decided that maybe he should talk about some other stuff like the Minion attractions that are pretty new down there, the whole Minion Land and the Minion Cafe.

And he talks a little bit about the Minion Cafe. And I found Al Rooker's thoughts on this a little bit more interesting than his tart. Al, tell us about Minion Land. I want to hear about your favorite part of Minionland. I got to tell you, it's so much fun because the minions are there. There's all this stuff there. I mean, besides, you know, this great Minionland itself, which is on the main drag, you've

got the Minion Cafe, which was awfully tasty. And in fact, I got to eat something that looks, it's the soup that looks like Minion Brains when they bring it out. It looks, yeah, it looks grim, but it tastes fantastic. There's a lot of yellow. Okay, it is the, Al had the soup that looks like Minion Brains.

And now I heard that and thought, well, maybe that's something that they have but then i looked up the actual name of the item this is just called otto's noodle bowl yeah this is not called minion brain i actually remember seeing it yeah you saw this okay um just it's just a bowl that looks like a minion right it's just a regular soup yes this is important visual uh clarity you're correct that like it comes in yeah a clear bowl and the yellow is provided not by the bowl itself but by the noodles which are bright yellow and then you kind of like turn it and dump it onto your plate and mix it with the other ingredients but i don't think the intention here was for it to be minion brain soup,

which makes it all the more strange when the host kind of grimace. And then he says, sounds grim, but tastes great. That was because I had a difference. I had the green tomato soup, which I think is just tomato soup, but it doesn't look like a brain or a liver.

No, there was pork belly in it. It's minion puke. It's a little some red wait pork belly in a tomato soup it was surprisingly good and then it came with a little pimento cheese grilled cheese it was delicious yeah great that sounds like well you know i you know just like we're gonna end up like pining for the other restaurant instead of the one we're supposed to be talking about yeah as al did i thought i thought al was more fascinating talking about minion cafe we haven't even gotten into these tots i'm excited to hear about the tots by the way i also like in that clip how he was actively trying to ferment a fight between butternut squash and pumpkin spice oh yes at the

very top of that yeah there's a constraint because his thing is butternut squash and he says like well unlike you know all that pumpkin spice. Who likes pumpkin spice? And kind of gets nothing either way. He doesn't get like a boo. Yeah. I'm kind of like, I don't know. I don't think anyone knows what they're doing exactly with the hatred of pumpkin spice.

Oh, yeah. What is it? It's just one of those things people have started doing. And do they mean it? Is it just like a fun game for everybody to participate in i did is i like the people in that restaurant and confused by it and have no opinion either way hmm i it feels like it's just maybe it's so uh everywhere now then that people are annoyed by it i think the ubiquity but is it also just is it like does it have something to do with like

uh like you're so you with your soft as well? Is it like one of those minotaur slams? I don't know. I'm not sure. I think it feels very like, I'm not sure what people can identify what's going on here. Exactly. Other than like, I see it too much. Listen, I would pumpkin spice the neck of my enemy and then eat him.

Sure. Get your rocks off that way actually i had a pumpkin uh filled ravioli the other day with some red sauce it was great it's like a little sweetness oh yeah and it's a sweetness that's not too overpowering it doesn't feel like you're having dessert so you can mix it with something savory i think it's fine yeah i've been drinking i've been eating the Duncan branded Goldfish pumpkin Spice goldfish Wow really

Hold on I've been really Into the Sweet goldfish lately I got the elf one I got the 20th anniversary Maple spice You're leaving me in the dust here

The official goldfish cracker. Goldfish crackers. They have a cookie line. They have a sweet line. Oh, they have a cookie line. Yeah. Is the consistency of the Goldfish the same like crispy, like a cheesy one? It is still.

No, it's like a thinner, crispy butter cookie almost. But the same size as like a Goldfish. Same size as a Goldfish. Wow. Fascinating. You know what I had that was kind of an interesting combo recently was that Campbell's is doing a chunky ghost pepper chicken noodle, which sounds like kind of a weird. Wait, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean. Did I say that I had that? I didn't. That was just something that I saw on Deal Vibes. Yeah. That's an exclusive deal. It looks good. I actually missed that one.

The heads up on ghost pepper soup. So here's also what's happening. Progresso or whatever, that's an exclusive deal. It looks good. I actually missed that one. The heads up one. So here's also what's happening. Progresso or whatever, the soup cans, those ones, they are making spicy soups, and they are so spicy. Wow, really? Really? For real spicy, like a chicken tortilla soup and like a spicy chicken noodle. So I guess Campbell's is getting the games too.

Interesting. I was like, okay, spice whatever. They're going to sell spicy stuff at the grocery store. Spicy. I got it in it. It killed me. Wow. It killed me me wow oh my god and this is you we're talking about yeah you were like you were like down on your back for a little bit yeah i'm somewhat of a heat seeker myself so i don't want to start any more rivalries if you start stealing people's catchphrases uh catchphrases from what this is other podcast this is this is the first podcast I've ever listened to because I got tagged in this. Not only did we bring you to X,

you've never listened to a podcast at all. Wow, wow. This is like the radio, but it's like you download it or it's on an app. It's weird. Yeah, you got it. It is like the radio.

Check it out a lot. It is a little confusing. Just be a little careful about the kinds of things like if you're passionate about like a hot salad right above the podcast forum i think that area is kind of covered by this other guy okay okay i won't i won't touch you guys i mean i don't have many food opinions uh you know i i like i go to those restaurants i'm like you know the mcdonald's like i said i'll tell you what the spicy jam i'd give it like, if I was bringing like one to five

I don't know, forks. It's like four forks two times. At least make it like pitch forks or something. It's not exactly hell that you're in, but that conception the devil hell. I'll bring it four and a half battle axes. Yeah, so eight

blades and nine blades total on my battle axe. That's not bad. That's not bad bad you could also yeah you could make it out of like six six six that might kind of like get you away from the you're thinking of like a demon thing i'm more from like the greek thing not not like the william blake oh right judeo-christian right background i'm more of like a greek zeus's son i think uh that sounds right it was a long time ago yeah it seems right like he yeah made love to a ball you haven't done you don't know your own and you haven't done like an ancestry on yourself so you don't know exactly what you i don't know i don't know

is there a christian minotaur i'm looking it up i'm sure we've been like appropriated by certain religions i agree it says what religion is the minotaur and it's greek it is greek mythology yeah that makes sense no my favorite religion greek greek is the religion what's your mount rushmore of religions greek roman persian american yeah american number one well then let me let me let me tie it all together uh with food opinions do you haven't done this yourself and they aren't, you know, you just high five minions while they went by. If you had to take a guess

and follow Al's error and crack open a minion skull and eat the innards inside, would you have a good, do you think that would taste good? Any thoughts? Honest, my first thought,

maybe just because we were talking about, I honestly think the brains would be a little pumpkin spice flavored, a little like cinnamon. Somebody broke down what pumpkin spice actually is. It's not anything to do with pumpkin have you heard this no i forget somebody broke it down it's like it's like it's like cinnamon cardamom nutmeg nutmeg and it's a specific mix what you put into the pie yes yeah exactly so the pumpkin itself is not necessarily like part that's what it is. So the pumpkin itself is not necessarily like part. That's why it's pumpkin spice, not pumpkin. It's the spice of a pumpkin.

The spice of a pumpkin pie. Yeah. Wow. Like it's the brains of a minion. It should be pumpkin pie spice then. I have had some pumpkin pie lattes I've been seeing on coffee shop menus. It's a little sweeter. But I'm saying if it's called pumpkin spice and it's really just the spice you put in a pumpkin pie,

the pie part really should really be in the title. You're correct, but I think that does make me, now I start leaning that that's... Too sweet. Yeah, maybe I'm avoiding that kind of thing. Because I think a pumpkin ravioli or a pumpkin bread, you would get similar spice profiles. There's room for savoriness in the general pumpkin description.

Wouldn't a minion taste like a banana because they eat so many bananas? I just think they have good bones. They make good bone ice cream. Okay. Probably with, I bet at some point, there's so much banana that some of that banana is going to filter down to the bone. And then you've got a natural flavor that, like, say the bones of a Mike might not inherently have.

Those long bones. Long, youthful feeling. He's licking his forked tongue. Oh, he's licking his tongue. He's licking with his tongue. He's licking his fork. He actually can lick his tongue.

Oh, that's cool. That's a dream. Has he ever wanted to lick tongue, bro? Somebody else's? No, no, no. Your own. That's right. So I got to ask this with one of my biggest regrets.

Talk about Universal Socket. I don't want to keep bringing it up. I'm not doing it to brag. It just happens to be a lot of Minion stuff over there. I regret not getting there. It was a a minion burger that was a perfectly yellow bun oh yeah with a little eyeball in the center of it and i'm sure the hamburger was just kind of normal i'm sure the bread wasn't flavored but it looked beautiful like it's so cool like i i really like that like i had the i had some mochi ice cream at the tokyo disney sea that looked like the little clobbery guys. Oh, yes.

That was great. That was also really good. That was top notch. And, you know, for some reason, maybe I trust that kind of thing to be done better in the Japanese parks. Because there's stuff like that in Mario, I feel like, that's like. I don't want any color on my burger bun. That's what I'm. Have you guys had a good iteration of that?

No. Only if it's like seared. Like if they sear like an image or something. Oh, that's fine. Yeah, yeah. That's fine. But I don't want to eat the black bun at Burger King. Oh, that's right.

They've done that there. Yeah. Wow, wow. And it's that dye that probably turns your poop neon blue. Right. You hear what I'm saying, buddy? Absolutely. Yeah.

It's happened because I had the black Slurpee like 20 years ago. Yep. And I shit neon blue. Oh. Yeah. Let's just say there's a few blue poops laying around the labyrinth right now. Okay. All right.

I hear you. King Bun. I hear you. Oh, no. Well, any closing thoughts on today, Cafe? I know you haven't been, Minotaur, but does this all make you excited to go? I would definitely go. I mean, it seems like, let me ask you this.

If today's show is stuff taken away, is it a serviceable good cafe for like a coffee and a breakfast? Serviceable, yeah. It was fine. It's a lot of variety. It was fine. As I said, it's a more pleasant environment, I think, than the previous establishment was.

It's right at the front of the park, so it's convenient. I feel like theme park habits-wise, I feel like I'm really trying to get a coffee before I get into the park wherever I am because I think it's going to be more of a hassle. And, you know, like in Orlando, I'm in a hotel where I know that's going to be a quick starbucks there um i i don't i i'd like my coffee to kick in before i am in the park but are you guys that way are you willing to uh have your your morning jolts in the park itself i'm willing but i do think it's nice to do it on the way i mean the best is if you can if you're going to

disneyland for instance your mobile order as you're going to Disneyland, for instance, your mobile order is you're like walking down downtown Disney for that Starbucks there. Sure. And you grab it. That is a nice thing to walk in with a little cup. Or if you get like a deal on like a 12-pack of Java Monster Energy. Well, yeah. You can drink that on the drive down or the train ride over. You can drink all 12 on the way down.

That's right. And then you're ready. I'm sure coffee's not bad or else you're going to be hoofing it that uh parking garage restaurant that's right i've always huffing it everywhere i go you know it started tense but i feel like things worked out and now i'm so happy to say minotaur you survived podcast the ride the second gate i'm so glad you could join us wow that's amazing it's like this labyrinth of a podcast that you talk about was actually a lot more fun than mine i didn't feel like i was gonna die at all once it's great a little easier than the one you preside over i'd say and you know what let's

let's give you the opportunity to to exit through the gift shop uh is there anything that you minotaur would like to plug sure yeah yeah of course of course come to my labyrinth uh there's great treasure and reward at the end of it if you can solve my riddles and puzzles and survive me trying to kill you, sure. Also, gosh, I just saw this Indiegogo. There's a great filmmaker named Matt Mazzani who has an Indiegogo.

He's trying to raise some money for a short film starring Mike Mitchell from some other podcast called The Doughboys. That's the, Minotaur, that's so minute. It's hard. That's so crazy. You bring that up. That's what I was alluding to with the fork scores and everything. That's the podcast that, that,

that guy is on Mike Mitchell. I just read it on his Wikipedia. I didn't even know what it was. I was just being polite, but that's this whole other podcast. It's good. I mean, we're way more popular.

Don't tell him guys. We're pockets. All right. It's insanely more popular than dough boys, but still a good one. A good podcast. Yeah. Theme parks are much more universal than Doughboys But still a good one, a good podcast Because yeah, theme parks are much more universal than food Yeah, yeah, yeah, no

That's right, sure I'll take it But Indiegogo for a short called Big Brothers Matt Mazzani, look it up if you can Donate if you can He's trying to raise some money for this film So check that out Wow, wow

Hey, and you know Matt Mazzani It's funny you just happened to catch that And a good man and i think he's going to make a good film and he's going to be good to the crew on that this is a guy who's good to the crews i know you're gonna expect you're you're a you're a minotaur of the people sure you treat you treat people right before uh you start cracking their necks open and chopping their heads off um would there be some sort of uh news like what sauce would matt mazzani lay out for the crew like crafty section do you think there's gonna be a lot of sweet and spicy that's what i'm asking okay well there'll be spicy jam got it the mango mambo sauce yeah yeah what is this dc we're not in dc no you know what

i have a few packs of mambo sauce For my East Coast brothers And sisters Alright Sure I appreciate it We're fine with Mambo How do you guys Do you want to like Rassle a little bit It's really up to you It's an audio podcast

This is a problem We don't really have Three cameras Shoot I mean we can This is going to sound like Foley Which we've all learned Oh the mentor

Is getting up Mick Foley He's hearing up To hear the scrapes Listeners Mick Foley Oh boy He's charging Oh scrapes, listeners. Oh, boy. He's charging. Oh, no, no, no.

Thanks for subscribing to the second game. If you want to dig even deeper, join us on our VIP venture at Club 3, where you get one bonus episode every month on our regular episodes, and free. Please. I thought you guys ended up in a good place. Spare our co-host, Mike. Oh, he's getting his rocks off

while he's doing it. I can tell. Oh, he's clearly his rocks off while he's doing it. I can tell. Oh, he's clearly aroused. Mike was right. Forever Dog. This has been a Forever Dog production. Executive produced by Mike Carlson, Jason Sheridan, Scott Gairdner, Brett Boehm, Joe Cilio, and Alex Ramsey.

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