Sleep Deprived Podcast - Drake's Snake - SDP #146

Episode Date: February 12, 2024

the fellas talk about airplanes for 29 minutes. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey everybody, welcome back to Sleep Deprived Podcast, episode 146. This is a big one. This is a big one. Oh, this one's huge. This is sort of like an unveiling of the new member of our podcast. Big member.

We have a new member joining the podcast today, but we can't say what it is for the first 45 seconds because then the video gets demonetized so we're going to continually shift around the topic but it is girthy is what i will say yeah i'm scared of the six it's bigger than six let's just say they're calling it seven god now we're going to 10 god okay so we're talking of course about drake's dick which was leaked on the internet drake's snake drake's snake we can say helicopter trunk so here i wasn't very impressed when i saw the image but then i saw the video and i realized that he's not fully erect in this video.

There is an amount of flop happening here, which means he's not even at peak length. So imagine that dick peak erect. That thing would be fucking huge. Mika, can you play an elephant sound effect? I'm like, yeah, I sure I can do that. Yeah, he's not even hard. He's not even hard. He's not even hard. He's probably semi-hard.

He's semi-hard, but he's not fully erect. And the fact that it's flopping around like that at that erection level, I mean, that is just... I mean, it's just wow is all I can say. I'm scared of the six. I have to say I am very impressed.

Something is wrong with it, though. Like, how so? If you look at the first frame of the video, it sort of looks like E.T.'s finger. Like, the top of his dick is fully white. Like... I think this is probably just like, you know a warm-up type of scenario yeah i think so yeah it seemed i mean he just kind of seemed like he was you know in bed and

i mean let's delve into the facts if he did it afterwards let me come flying around everywhere so it has to be before but but maybe what's the white stuff is that pre-come then i didn't see white stuff look at the video again and play it there's a lot of shine going on in the in the early parts of the video there's a big white shine on the tip of the dick does he have flash on i don't have flash is illuminating off the dick the pre-cum to create this luminescence. You see what I mean? I just want to say, I think he was playing with that at the start, and then he actually starts

jerking it. I'm furthering meat inspection. I think that he is playing it, I agree, and then he does jerk it. He jerks it halfway through. There's no question he's jerking it there. That's jerking. What do you think he's looking at on his phone though because he has his phone in his other hand honestly i think he's jerking off to himself well i got the impression he was it was like

pointed at a mirror you know like i don't think this is a separate person taking a video i think it's just that's even funnier it's like someone like across across the tower from him in a city they're just recording that's what i thought i thought it's someone else recording but it is a mirror yeah it's a mirror he's jacking off to himself no i i don't think he's doing that i think he well i guess technically yeah but my impression is that that was like for someone else you know i mean you don't know that though yeah it's for the internet well i guess okay i may i think there are some conspiracy theories to be had here if you may and if i may and if i may be indulged if you can indulge all

eight inches then go ahead i could indulge all nine inches. I don't think nine yet. I think it's a soon to be nine. Yeah. Well, so he was referenced on Megan, the Stallions distract or not distract, just rap track called pissed. And there was a line there that a lot of people thought was about a BBL.

It turns out it was just about a tummy tuck. So I think a lot of people right now are searching up Drake's tummy tuck slash BBL. It's just rumors. But I think he leaked his own Wang in order to distract from that in the same way that like, I feel like Taylor Swift would write a song called problematic so that when people Google Taylor Swift problematic, the song would come so that when people Google Taylor Swift problematic, the song would come up instead of, instead of like,

yeah. I mean, all I want to say is Drake is putting a new meaning to Megan. The stallion is, did he name it Megan? No, I'm just saying that as a stallion like that. Oh yeah.

Yeah. It's like a third, it's like a third leg, you know,. Yeah, it's like a third leg. You know R2-D2 is like a third leg? That's like his third leg. Yeah, I mean, we're not joking. It is, by all accounts, like, he's gifted. I think we can just all admit that, right?

Rizzy glizzy. Honestly, I need to see it fully erect. Right now... Right now, I don to see it fully erect right now. Right now. I don't think it's, uh, it's quite gifted yet. Do you hear what I'm fucking around with? Yeah.

What is that? That's a measuring tape. Wait, I just realized we could actually measure how big, how big Drix Drix dicks is. Oh, based on the phone. Yeah. Based on on the phone let's assume it's a pixel six let's look up uh maybe well no he do have a new one what's the newest pixel model well you don't know when this video was recorded oh this is recent this is hot off the press drake could not hold on to that legendary video for very long i think he put that out the day it was released so I'm gonna look at the pixel 8 pro

look at the length here it's 6.7 inches and it looks his dick looks bigger than the phone there well you also have to take into account the perspective like how far forward is the phone the hands

also Drake might be digging into his skin to make it look bigger, you know? Like, he's going all the way down to the bone, so he tries to make it look as big as possible. That might be his strut right now. Okay, so if you compare the hand, his hand that is holding the phone

seems to be about two-thirds of the size of the phone. And then if you look at the hand holding the dick, I mean, that's not two thirds of the phone. So I think Drake is at least packing 10 inches here based on that measurement of the pixel eight pro, which is 6.7 inches long. That's wild.

For the type of person Drake is like, he's so like, like he's ego egotistical sometimes, but he never mentions his Goliath, his dragon... His stallion. His stallion, his Lincoln Log.

I just don't understand why he never brought it up. Which is why I think maybe it's fake. Think about it. In this video, he's holding it at the base practically the whole time, so maybe it's one of those fake dicks. Have you ever seen that one video of a guy holding his dick and like a toilet and then he drops his dick into the toilet dick gate it's a fake dick it might be a fake dick i think we should start that because i'm tired of of drake having everything he wants and so you know what that's a fake dick yeah it is kind of like absurd isn't it he has he has money he has fame wealth alter egos alter

egos women like and this well he's just getting away with everything i'm proud it's chosen i guess you could say it was god's plan. Yeah, but his dick is like one third of mine, so I mean, it's not that impressive, but for a normal person, it's impressive. Yeah, that's a really tiny wiener. What? Oh, Drake's. Yeah, Drake's is... Drake's has a really tiny wiener.

I think you just told on yourself a little bit. No. I put Drake to shame. It's like... It's like a big log. No. I put Drake to shame and it's like it's like a big log of poo. I don't know how big. I don't know what the comparison is. A big log of poo? It's like a water bottle. That's the least

sexy thing you could tell somebody. My dick is like a big log of poo. Hey, you want to see my log of poo? Ladies love the log. I love playing with a measuring tape. Is there any reason you brought it out while this is the topic

we've been discussing? Just curious. No, I'm just playing with it. Oh, yeah. It's funny, I actually don't have measuring tape near me. That's interesting. Yeah.

So you have it in the bathroom i actually i don't know where it is to be honest since i moved mika i was in your room and i looked at your ruler the ruler you have and i see at the 10 inches mark there's a giant pencil mark i was actually noticing i there was a a mark uh like a sharpie mark more permanent by the one or two inch area I like to keep it I was just thinking maybe like the sharpie was sort of where you're currently at and then the pencil is maybe the goal after a lot or maybe it's the growing and then what or maybe it's the showing and then the growing. I don't think so though.

Because the sharpie mark was really. Harshly drawn in. At the two inch mark. And there was even a frowny face next to it. Drawn to it. To signify an extreme emotional moment. Yeah. It's funny you bring that up.

Because I actually. You mailed me that ruler. And I was like. Why funny you bring that up because i actually um you mailed me that ruler and i was like why did you do that well like why did you mail me a ruler with sharpie marker on it i don't know i thought i thought that was weird but yeah but i don't have a red sharpie i use a black one and so the red mark there was just that's specifically you that drew that and then we brought out a yardstick and at the end of it was my sharpie line yeah yeah you had basically flipped the yardstick around right you were measuring from the other side accidentally no no no no no no yeah it's weird i actually don't own any sharpies it's it's with the ruler came a red sharpie and i don't know why you sent me that too yeah yeah well yeah drake small dick yeah the chode all right

not as big as dicks that i've seen yep the dicks i've seen did you guys um speaking since we, since we're talking about music industry and stuff, did you see the Grammy winners and stuff? Who won? Oh, I heard Miley Cyrus won. Yeah, Miley Cyrus, the song that blew up the I Can Buy Myself Flowers song. I actually haven't heard that. It won record of the year.

Let me give it a listen which makes no sense to me you think it sucks um i just feel like it's definitely not her strongest and what's your strongest i'm not sure honestly but i just think that that song is not particularly powerful like strong in my opinion I like won my Cyrus song Let me figure it out It's um Is it Wrecking Ball No I mean that one's not that bad

Though but I like Wrecking Ball Um I don't fuck it It was the one with like Mark Ronson or something Oh I don't know that one yeah well she has a song called Hoedown

Throwdown from 2009 you ever listen to that no I haven't I haven't I'm sorry to bring it back to Drake but Drake should just make an OnlyFans at this point like everyone's seen it he could make a shit ton of money you should just do that now I saw a lot of people thirsting

over it oh yeah that big luscious um sorry i don't know what that was i'm trying to currently get this measuring stick up into the vent on the ceiling among us ah i gotta it's i gotta retract it it happens yeah i saw this um i saw that there's this guy who tracks flights of celebrities just because taylor swift won album of the year um anyways there's this guy who will like track celebrity private jets and he was like tracking all of taylor swift's private jets so that people could track her carbon emissions and her team sent him a cease and desist that's awesome yeah it's like i i want to understand the the taylor swift hype but i don't know uh-oh what dude you're gonna

you're getting into some hot water i'm definitely these oh yeah dude the swifties will fuck you i i want to give the new album a try because i want to be able to appreciate taylor swift uh did you hear the name of the album she announced is it called poop sock no but that's called drink stick no can you imagine that'd be insane holy shit while she's dating travis kelsey oh my god what drama it's called Tortured Poets Department. That is an album title. I'm sure she is very tortured. What a tortured soul. Man, I wish I had a private jet.

I want a private jet. There's a song called Fortnite featuring Post Malone on this album. Are you serious? And Down Bad. There's a song called Down Bad. There's a song called But Daddy, I Love Him. Are you serious? Yeah.

Wait, no, wait. Where are you seeing this? There's a song called L-O-M-L. There's a song called Poop Sock. I think you're trolling me right now. There's a song called Possibly Drake's Penis. No, it's just called Drake's Penis. Oh, okay. I see it. I see it i see it uh fortnight feet post malone the tortured poets department my boy only breaks his favorite toys down bad so long london but

daddy i love him fresh out the slammer florida guilty as sin oh also florida feet florence in the machine. What's afraid of little old me? I can fix him. Excuse me. Who's afraid of little old me? Sorry. No, it says what's afraid of little old me?

Not on my end. Well, and then the next song is I can fix him. And then in brackets, no, really, I can. And then L-O-M-L. Is that like laughing on my limp dick right i can do it with a broken heart the smallest man who ever lived the alchemy clara bow the manuscript bonus track yeah no that says who's afraid a little old man i don't believe you that it says what's it show me screenshot it okay well i just saw it on a tweet so you're you're right actually yeah

wow you're really going at it with the measuring tape huh you know drake's not really a stroker though like it's only like micro stroking he's only using the tips of his fingers like I don't know yeah I'm starting to think he's kind of washed yeah he needs to wash his dick well it's dirty at the beginning it looks like foam

his dick is foaming I mean really though can your dick foam? Yeah, I bet. Can dicks foam? Dick foam. The aftermath of your...

Jack off a lot, you start foaming. Dude, maybe he is just jacking off himself. I think he's just jacking off and, like, foaming up. His dick is really reflective. that's what i'm saying like it's he yeah you know that's probably it yeah because how could a dick be that reflective yeah it looks like et's finger dude maybe that's the port maybe that's the truth it's a fake dick like i'm yeah yeah i'm telling you uh mika can you put this video up on the screen there's this guy and then he has to take out and then eventually the dick falls into the toilet and he's like oh my god his dick fell off but it was just a big dick

i think that's what it is i can't i'm sorry i can't put that on the screen can i put it on the screen um probably I put it on the screen? Probably not. No, we would get our channel deleted instantly. Yeah. I saw Drake put a story on his Instagram that he deleted shortly after. At least this is what I saw. I can't verify if this actually happened. But allegedly he wrote, I wasn't hiding.

I wasn't hiding it from the world i was hiding the world from it no did you really do that i i maybe that's what i saw but i can't verify awesome so he leaked out a fake dick i'm actually for this story i think dick gay i think he leaked out a fake dick i think there's for this story. I think dick gay. I think he leaked out a fake dick. I think there's definitely something afoot. Just think about it. Like Drake knows how big he is. He knows that people will be searching for that dick. So if I was him, I would be recording in front of a mirror, just wagging it around like a dog's tail.

Honestly, I swear celebrities will, they will like quote unquote leak something to the internet to distract from some other thing that's happening in their life. So I wouldn't be surprised. Sometimes, like honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if this means that like something bad happened that he's trying to like not bring attention to. All right. Now, Kanye also had his dick leaked at one point point you don't see a lot of people talk about it so i need to see who's got the bigger dick oh yeah can you send that one of course can we put that on the screen oh yeah for sure okay cool mika do you want to see Kanye's dick too? I'm not entirely sold on it. Can you just describe it?

His dick is kind of... I don't know. His dick's kind of mid. I like Drake's more. So you want me to describe it? Kanye's dick. Like in a way where it's like we won't get age restricted. How do you do that when talking about a penis?

Maybe, perhaps you could use metaphors or something. Okay. Imagine rivers on a globe, right? Like you're looking at a state, right? A US state on a globe and there's rivers. Okay. Now imagine that those rivers were indented as if they were veins. That is like really a huge prominent part of Kanye's member is that it is there.

It is. It looks like there are a bunch of rivers on it. You get what I mean? I do. Yeah. It's a really veiny member. I see. And not as long as Drake's. Well, we can't see how long it is. I see. And not as long as Drake's.

Well, we can't see how long it is. I mean, you think it goes longer there? Maybe. I think it's pathetic not to show the head. I'm going to say it. I think it's pathetic not to show the head because you're trying to get people to think, oh, maybe it's longer. But you don't know. This is the head.

Okay, you have the head? Yeah. Okay. Can we put that on the screen oh totally yeah no that one actually could could go on the screen if you pixelated somehow to be on a spoiler tag i don't know if i want to open it it's it's it's it's not what you love it you actually just dm'd me this and what do you think i don't know if i want to click the spoiler tag it's not a picture of his g i like your cut g yeah it's sort of a hair it's a haircut yeah it's kind of like a hat, I guess. Like he's wearing a beanie. Please delete this.

Please delete this. You want me to post it again uncensored? Please delete this from our DM. Please. Please. Okay, Ken. Wow. Amazing. Thank you so much.

Wow. Today has been a wild day huh the internet has been set ablaze the world has been set ablaze what else have you guys been up to uh do you really want to know Okay, so I bought this water bottle. Okay? Now Gene. Now Gene Brand. Now Gene Brand. Okay? Oh, yeah.

So I've been filling this up with water. So I fucking, I go to the fridge, Mika. Yeah. And I fill it all the way. 1,000 milliliters and I drink it. I drink it! That's actually pretty dope. How about you? What have you been up to?

I was just, you know, working. I found out that my water bottle has a lot of, like, black mold. And I've been drinking from it for a very long time. Yeah. It's pretty hilarious.

So are you gonna die? i don't know can you please click the image that big poo sent you i did yeah oh you saw the head i did yeah see it's because he's a head in life your head in the game if you were to take open open you know pull down someone's trousers and a big dick flopped out and the head actually looked like that like it was kanye's face what would you do what would you do um would you talk to it or like i would definitely talk to it i mean that'd be that'd be kind like is this kanye is this like a clone of kanye or is this someone that like acts like kanye i think you have to get to know him to figure that out. I'd feel bad jerking off.

You would just be hurting him all the time. Yeah, I feel like I'd be scared to suck it off. Because maybe he would bite you. He'd bite you. He'd bite the inside of your lip. And be like, eh. Or he'd sniff. Maybe that would be kind of nice.

For the audio listeners it's basically kanye's head like his normal head white background but it doesn't have his hair where his hair is there's just a giant head of a dick like the front face of a dick where it like makes like the heart shape so my water bottle mika is uh it has a fish car on it oh did you get it from item label i did yeah it's my favorite thing ever i i actually love this thing it might be my most prized personal possession now i was uh i was looking at that while we were prepping for your charity stream and i was about to buy it but then i was like thinking about microplastics and i'm trying to do research about if like what is it bad that i bought this mika well i don't know i i don't if it's your favorite thing in the world you shouldn't isn't it much better than using water bottles

yeah well i i don't use water bottles like disposable ones you use your hands? No, I use a water bottle, but I just found out it is covered. Like the sucker part has is like covered in black mold underneath the plastic. It's clear. You need to buy a new one. Yeah, but you're guilting yourself because you think it's going to hurt the planet. I'm going to, no,

no, no, no, no, no, I'm not. No, I'm,

I'm wondering if it's healthy to drink from like plastic water bottles because of like like i i need to do more research about if it will like see microplastics into my bloodstream from i already got already got microplastics in most of the shit i'm eating got shit in it man i got rat poop in it it got it got got fucking Johnny's plastic from the factory. It's got a sharp beer in it. Definitely tons of plastic. Yeah, it's got some pubes in it. It's got Drake's pubes in it, probably.

I probably have eaten one of Drake's pubes. There's probably been a Drake pube that went down the toilet, into the sewer, and went into a plastic water bottle, and then someone picked it up, and then they brought it to the factory, and they melted it down, and they reused it, and now there's a pube in my item label water bottle and I'm drinking Drake's little pube.

Liquid pube. We are truly like all connected. Yeah, I have the head of a Siberian tiger just right in front of my door. I have an entire grizzly bear in my room. It's a stuffed grizzly bear.

Just kick it around or I don't know Yeah I beat it up and I pretend I'm really masculine Yeah I have a sniper and I just Start laughing I've got a couple Sanrio Build-A-Bears That's cute Yeah

Dude there should be I'm sorry No go ahead Panda No you go That's cute. Yeah. Dude, there should be... I'm sorry. No, go ahead, Panda. Go ahead. No, you go. You go ahead. No, you go ahead.

No, you go ahead. No, you go ahead. No, you go ahead. I was just saying there should be... No, Panda, you go ahead. Like, there's a Build-A-Bear. There should be a Destroy-A-Bear. That'd be pretty fun. Dude, have you... Maybe you can just bring a Build-A-Bear, there should be a Destroy-A-Bear. That'd be pretty fun. Dude, have you...

Maybe you can just bring a Build-A-Bear to a Rage Room. Do you know about Rage Rooms? I have actually seen that, yeah. What is that? It's where you just break everything, right? Really? That's fucking sick! Yeah, you can rent a room and then it'll be stocked

with TVs and furniture. And they give you protective gear and a baseball bat and plates a room and then it'll be stocked with like TVs and like furniture and they give you protective gear and a baseball bat and like plates and you get to just like go to town wait no joke for episode 200 can we go to a rage room and just break

everything I'm down and then I walk out with a cigarette I really needed this this is awesome. This is sick. Yeah. I saw like, you can also play your own music in the rage room.

Some people choose to play like really emotional music. And like some people after breaking everything, they just start crying. Sorry. That's not funny. I shouldn't laugh. That's hilarious. No, no, it seems really therapeutic to just like let it out you know oh man i don't i yeah would love this i think i would try it once i'm kind of curious to try it

i think i would have fun i want a flamethrower that'd be sick can you bring guns is it just a hammer like i want to do you can't you can't bring guns you can probably bring like a baseball bat or like uh that's what i would do baseball bat maybe a sledgehammer what flamethrower probably not probably not considering there's like a lot of wood dude this is actually the best idea like this is the best money maker because think about it who wouldn't want to do this and also there's probably tons of broken tvs and shit like that nobody's going to use anyways or that they won't work ever so this is their purpose this is the purpose of a tire that sucks or a tv that doesn't work i think the future of junk yards is to have like integrated rage rooms so that you can like find junk that you want

and then destroy it and like maybe you're maybe you're doing the environment a favor because now we're not using like garbage compactors that emit like co2 we're just like destroying things with baseball bats isn't that such a weird reality though we have so much waste that now we're finding ways to commodify the waste by like just breaking it damn actually that is pretty funky yeah but if you know what you know what else is funky what our patreon yeah follow us over to the patreon section the pod extends itself for $5 a month you get a discord server extended episodes uncensored videos

sometimes you get bonus shows for if you pay more money go over to the patreon section of the podcast bye you need to say bye you can't do that bye

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