Sleep Deprived Podcast - M&M's are CANCELED. - SDP #94

Episode Date: January 31, 2023

the boys talk about airplanes for 45 minutes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What's up guys, it's the Gooch. Today we're gonna be doing something a little bit different. As you guys all know, or should know, we have a Patreon where for $5 every month, the podcast doubles in length. You see, on this Patreon extended cut of the podcast, there's the Collins, where you guys talk to us on the podcast forever cementing yourself on an episode

for the low, low price of $15 a month where you also get access to other things, but honestly, really, it's just embarrassing if you can't afford it. But for this episode, I decided, hey, why not show people what the Collins are like so people know what they could be getting so uh yeah i hope this entices you yo path welcome to this uh the sleep deprived podcast what's up hello gamers a question for you uh and this is really like fucked up oh but um it's really not say are you a meat eater i'm not really no hey based what's up telepathic okay well if say i came over there with a gun and i was like and i was like you have to go to the steakhouse

and get steak and order it and eat it kind of a weird thing that so you you go there and you're talking to the waiter and he's like okay we'll get you the steak how would you like that cooked what do you say this is difficult to answer because i don't i don't like steak so you had to i'm i'm at the table sitting with you and I'm pointing the gun at you from under the table. You have to answer. Okay, if you're here with me, what kind of steak do you like? I would say I'll take the filet mignon,

medium rare, please. Okay, then I'll get that. Can you eat it? Yeah, I could definitely eat it. What if you got rare, though like would you get rare if i was going to order yeah would you get rare mika's at the table as well where it's me mika everyone's at oh yeah and mika says i'll take the filet mignon but i want it rare and and i'm at the table and i just order a quinoa salad i am am too. There's that as well. And I have a bomb attached to my chest and I say, I'm going to blow up the entire building. Don't pick a rare.

That's really not, no, that's not going to happen. Oh, well, this changes things a little bit. Yeah, none of the bombs in the situation. Yeah, I think, you know, a rare steak, red and cool cool center this is what google is telling me right now that's kind of terrifying to me honestly thank you also never had the same exact way yeah you've never eaten wait time out i've had steak when i was like really young like maybe yeah okay before i you know but rare steak totally grosses you out though, right? That's like a thing for killers.

Absolutely. Terribly adjusted people. Yeah, but that makes sense in this situation. Me and Mika are the most normal, good people here. Is that not the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard? Oh, wow. The Sleep the Pride podcast is such a funny comedy podcast. No, I am a very normal person.

Me too. That is exactly what a normal podcast. No, I am a very normal person. Me too. That is exactly what a normal person would say. I want rare steak. Okay, well, what are you going to order? Oh, I thought I already answered within the first part of the question. No? Medium rare, right? Medium rare?

Yeah. Nice. Yeah, it's based. It's based. It's based. Thanks, Telepathic. Well, thank you. No problem.

Thanks, Pat. Appreciate it. We're not going to win. Everyone's going to pick medium rare. thanks telepathic thanks Pat appreciate it everyone's gonna pick medium rare you are not gonna win you're not going to win the fact that you have any confidence in a single point even a single fucking point

before this even started I was like we're not gonna win no like I'm not expecting to win and like it's okay i'm i'm okay with that i how about this mika i will give you the victory if you could get one person to genuinely say with no outside at with no outside fucking swaying that they would order a steak rare I'll give you the fucking W if someone says with no sway

yes okay well I think first of all we just need to bring Ben in here can we all agree talking Ben yes yes yeah get Ben in here Ben hey Ben you're just gonna be chilling hey Ben you doing good man love this guy yeah here. Ben! Hey, Ben. What's up? Ben!

Hey, Ben. You doing good, man? Love this guy. Love this guy. Hey, Ben. Yes? You like your steak bloody and rare? Yes. Yes!

He's a dog. He's a dog. Shut that dog in a room. What is up, Horror Date? Welcome to date welcome to the sleep deprived podcast how are you we got we got a really important question for you man uh what do you prefer do you would you order your steak rare or medium rare oh uh medium rare thank you yep makes sense yeah why though if it's too rare it's just like messy and kind of of gross, right? Yeah. But flavorful, right? It's pretty flavorful. It has a lot of flavor.

Well, I mean, if you consider like blood juice flavor, yeah. It's not blood, though. It's myoglobin. Why does everybody get this wrong? It's myoglobin. What about your globin? Dude, don't bring my globin into this. Don't be egging this guy on. Don't bring my globin into this don't be egging this guy on don't bring my globin into this i'm talking myoglobin that's globin i'm not globin no

i'm not globin no one man this is this is bullshit rick and morty but not globule i'm standing firmly on medium rare thank you you made the right choice all right well that was easy really thinking about buying land genuinely yo what's up man welcome to the sleep deprived podcast hello hello i'm in the middle of an overwatch match when i got the app for collins it's all good man you gotta win but also you gotta answer this question can you do that i can't do that i can't do that all right we're at a steakhouse together. It's going on my card. Don't worry.

You can get whatever steak you want. But the waiter asks, how do you want that cooked? What do you say? Ooh, medium well, without a doubt. Medium well? That's crazy. That's crazy. That's crazy.

We used to be a well-done guy until I figured out i could actually eat it different way besides eating a tire so yeah dude are you serious why like why i'm sounding like mika choose the wrong option yeah he did dude mika can you can you get this for a second and i'm not joking when i'm telling you that mika and panda both think that rare is the best option you just want an ice cube that tastes like meat that's what you're asking for yeah yes i like hearing it move it's warm and cooked and like soft yeah whatever you gotta say chewy and brus and stringy and it's warm and cooked and like the soft yeah whatever you gotta say stringy and it's not stringy come on it's not in your teeth no it's caught in your teeth yeah it's gross well i mean you didn't make the worst choice dark gen so i mean there's that you didn't pick rare okay yeah fair enough, fair enough. Which I think is the worst.

Can we all agree that well is worse than rare? No. What? Dude, come on. Eating fucking rock. What's the best choice then? Rare. Medium rare, obviously.

Rare. To be fair, the best is not uh buying into this whole meat packing industry that astros has denied his whole life this dude has never eaten a fucking bite of steak in his life soy steak right guys tofu tofu mushroom steak vegan steak mushroom steak i love eating you racers. I love tofu. Hell no. Well, thanks for coming on, Dark Jen. Go clutch that matchup. We are fucking losing, but I'm going to try to win the second half.

Thank you. Thank you. Good luck. You got this. Take it easy, man. Good luck. You too. Did he just wish me good luck on my Overwatch game? God, that was so awkward for him.

Pretty awesome. Yeah. GG Tyler, what's up, man? How you man how you doing oh what did you actually bring me on yeah you said you haven't been on before is that true is that yeah like you're not lying i've never been on before no what are you talking about but like genuinely have you been on before i've totally never been on. Absolutely. The last time I was on here was not when I had COVID. I mean, I've never been here before. I don't know what you mean. Is that why I'm a little sniffly today? Maybe.

Well, hey, Tyler, we got a very important question. All right. We're taking you out to a nice steak dinner. Don't worry. It's all paid for. It's going on my car. It's a business expense. Don't worry about it's all paid for. It's going on my card. It's a business expense. Don't worry about it.

You get the porterhouse. You get the filet mignon, whatever you want. The waiter asks, what are you going to do about this cooking situation? How would you like it cooked? What do you say?

Medium rare, I guess. Thank you. Thank you. See you. Okay, bye. Wow. Marble Jams, what's up? How you doing?

Welcome to the Sleep Deprived Podcast. Oh, hi. Hi, Astrid. What's up? Hey. Hi, Miki. Hey. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We got a really important question for you, okay? Okay. Steak. How cook? Let me see. I guess medium rare. Thank you. you no wait hold on would you would you ever be swayed to do rare um okay what is astro's opinion and what is your opinion amika because you two are pretty based i need to know i'm not based Sounds like me and you aren't base, dude. What do you mean?

Me and Panda are the basest people here. Yeah! Panda is, yeah, Astro and Mika, I love you too, so much. Okay, so I don't, thank you, I don't eat steak.

However, if I had to choose, just based on the scenario, just a hypothetical, medium rare. I would choose rare. Me too. If I could, honestly. Yeah, but Mika is currently not himself. That's not true.

This is the most clear I have ever been about any decision. I'm usually a very indecisive person. I have never felt so clear about a choice mika is absolutely lucid right now in his in his viewpoint i i think mika's hot right now i am so with this thanks man yeah it's getting a little weird ben ben might be with it too pretty based for liking rare as well but um but yeah personally i think it's vile and disgusting um but i don't think you seem to care what i think or say so well yeah i'm gonna stick with medium rare i'm really sorry that i didn't match with you mika i'm sorry it's okay marvel don't worry about it. It's all good. Okay. Before you go, why do you...

Why medium rare? I need to understand. That's just how my grandpa makes them, and my grandpa is a pretty good chef, so... Nice. That's fair. That's understandable. That's based. Shout out to your grandpa, you know? Thank you. Thanks for coming on.

No problem. You guys have a good night. Wow, Mikaika you're getting owned I like how Mika's the only one that's being like flamed on right now well I'm gonna bring on one thin boy come on someone's got it hey one thin boy

what's up um welcome to the sleep deprived podcast man hi how's it going good man we got a really important question for you man what's the question listen i want you to really think about it before you answer it because it's just it's not been my night so let me pause golden eye so i can so i can figure out this question what the hell did this guy tell him in 1998 don't worry it doesn't

require too much thought to make the right answer here. Okay. All right. Listen, you're at a delicious steakhouse. We take you out with the company card. We order you a nice steak, however you want it done. The chef comes out and he's like, listen, we got a few options for you. We got rare, medium, rare, medium, well done.

Which one are you choosing? I like medium well. The one you didn't say. Why? Yeah, why do you like medium well? I mean, I don't like it fully cooked through. It's like a little pink, but not too much where it's like, you know, bleeding. Right.

It's not blood, though. It's myoglobin. Yeah. You know that, right? You know it's not blood? If you don't think it's blood, then are you really a steak eater? It's what? It's not bleeding.

It's not bleeding. It's not blood. Oh, Matt Fraud. It's not blood. I don't think you're a real steak eater slut it's what are you talking about only a true steak eater would know what it is it's fucking mild globin a1 sauce on expensive steak i don't want to hear oh my god oh my god oh my god you've how does a steak eater say he likes medium well? That's preposterous. How does a steak eater not know it's not blood?

Fuck you, man. Fuck you. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Holy shit. Fuck you. He pays for our livelihood. I pay for this whole fucking podcast. That may be true, but you think it's Mayo something, not blood.

Oh my god, I hope your N64 dies. I hope it stops working. You're emulating it. Go fuck yourself. Oh wow. One thin boy, more like one fat boy.

You gonna take that? That is rough. Jay Slap, more like Jay Ugly. Oh! You gonna take that? That is rough. Jay slap more like Jay ugly. Oh! Get him the fuck outta here! Oh my god. Get him the fuck outta here! I have never seen something like this. Get him out! Get him outta here!

This is gone. Oh my god. Thanks for coming on, man. Can we bring on one last person? Or just speed through them until we find someone? How do you like your steak? Just one last person. There's no one. Listen, I'm going to bring in Caveman. They haven't been on before.

I feel like if there's anyone. A caveman would eat it fucking rare. If there's anyone, it's going to be caveman. Dude, please. Caveman. What's up, caveman? We're really counting on you here. We got a really important question for you.

How are you, by the way? What's important? Oh, no. oh no very good yes okay okay caveman we have like a really really important question for you i i just i really need you to think about this one okay i i believe in you man okay we're we're heading out all of us all of us everyone in this call we got Craig, who's recording, we got Astro, we got me, we got Panda, Schlatt, Talking Ben, and you, we all go to a nice steakhouse, right, we got the company card, we're gonna get you a nice steak, a nice delicious steak,

talking primo grade, right, waiter comes up,'s like hey man how can i how can i do your steak for you we got rare medium rare uh well done medium well done medium whatever you want we got it how are you getting your steak first grug just go out and kill cow himself and eat meat yes yes yes shut up talking ben you think you just because you beat me once and rock paper scissor you think you're better than me you think you're better than rug yeah oh my god oh wow oh shit well how are you getting okay so you you you get the cow yourself caveman you you kill him yes You're going to cook him at all or you just bite into him?

Sometimes Grug eat it raw, but sometimes Grug cook it medium rare. And which would Grug prefer? If Grug had nice lady Grug, had to impress lady Grug for a night out, is grug doing it no no no you're eating it for yourself this is your personal preference you're not trying to impress anyone this is

your personal preference i'll have 27 lady grug so but for himself grug just lived so long in cave he just needed raw yes yes hold on hold on that's just one fine dining he cook at medium rare that right right but but if you just it's for yourself like personal preference than raw right which one is taste better well medium rare tastes better it's not which one tastes better it's which one are you gonna know which one do you like more

which one do you prefer this way grog you make groug brain hard grug go get big club you make grug mad yeah that's okay you know what grug we're gonna send you

in the other direction grug go pillage entire city now okay grug be careful thanks grug be safe Grug go pillage entire city now Okay Grug Be careful out there Thanks Grug be safe Grug I fucking love Grug

I love Grug So far Ben and Grug are my favorites That's fucking awesome We need more Grug Ben thanks for being in here I love you Ben Thanks Ben Bye Ben Well, Ben, thanks for being in here, man. I love you, Ben. Thanks, Ben. Thanks, Ben.

Bye, Ben. Ben? Holy shit! Oh, my God! Ben! I'm sorry, but his pussies sent me to kill you. Oh, my... Ben? Ben? Ben? um ben

ben no for the audio listeners talking ben just changed his discord name to talking ben dead i love them so much what the fuck was that?

How's it going, boys? Oh, I was ready this time. Episode 94 of the podcast is going, and we just started, and it's me, Shalette, and I'm here with a panda. Wubba lubba dub dub! Wubba lubba dub dub! Is that your audition for the new show?

It sure is. I got one. Ready? I really need to stop. Morty. Morty. I thought you were doing an Ethan Klein. Dude, I used to post on my Instagram story back when that show was on and season one was on. I used to advertise it to my friends

on my story I was like hey you got to watch this show it's genius unlike season one episode three was premiering oh man yeah did you did you talk about how intelligent the writing was and how I did I did I was like this is the most this is the show for smart people and and I'm smart. So I felt good promoting it. Did you watch Big Bang Theory? No, but I watched Big Mouth. Oh. That's somehow worse. Love Big Mouth.

Love Big Mouth. Shout out to the animators, because I respect the animators, but I haven't heard very good things about that show. Animators? What do they do? The animators? I don't know. Listen, I was on a plane this one

time i was traveling somewhere and then this woman beside me was like watching big mouth the whole time wow that sucks does she have her headphones in uh no and it was like a five hour oh god and she was just watching you just had to listen you had to listen to big mouth for like five hours yeah if it was five hours and she plugged in her like ipad into the charger so it wouldn't run out so i mean it was really just i mean how many episodes is that like 10 i don't know i don't i really don't know she like you probably know the plot better than all of us no i don't remember it because this was a couple years ago like she really just went for it that's it that's all i wanted to say and then and then she gave you her earbud and said let's watch this together and then she put her hand on your hand

yeah then you showed her your big mouth what is up with my nose today you okay man oh my god sounds like a plunger yeah i'm not doing too well i don't know i don't know what's up let's talk about it man what's what's going on you eat something weird maybe you got like food poisoning no but i did just wait a fucking hour for the worst pizza ever it's like they put it on a sheet of fucking loose leaf like it's not even dough it's just worst pizza ever it's like they put it on a sheet of fucking loose leaf like it's not even dough it's just it's just it's like paper it's it was wet it was gross

paper was a delicacy in like fourth grade the crust didn't even rise it was it it there's like two inches of dough around the outside like i don't know who the fuck made this pizza but it's like they it's like they they saw a medieval interpretation of a pizza from an artist who had never seen one and was just trying to make a fucking pizza oh god i just saw the second photo of it that looks even worse at that yeah it's disgusting look at the photos of this fucking dude that crust is like awful i don't think i've ever seen crust that bad. It was absolutely disgusting. I picked up the second slice, and my hand became moist.

It was just like water or something on it. It's fucking gross. No, the second picture, there's more crust than pizza. You see that? There is. Should we throw that up on the screen? Yeah, put it up on the fucking screen. For our audio listeners, I just want you to imagine

like a soggy, wet, like paper-esque... Yeah, it looks like blood with like very little cheese and it looks like wet paper towel that you like hold up. That's kind of what it looks like.

It's on a tortilla. It does look like a raw tortilla. Did you just say tortilla? Tortilla. What did you say? What did he say? Tortilla, I think. He said tortilla. Tortilla.

That's really embarrassing. That's how you say it. No. It's not. Pretty embarrassing. It's not really. What the hell? All right, guys.

Pick on me as you do. I'm fine with it. Dude, we're just... Okay. You're picking on our intelligence. You said it funny. You'm fine with it. Dude, we're just... Okay. You're picking on our intelligence. You said it funny. You just said it funny, that's all. You just said it funny. I reckon there is

no wrong way to say something. No, I don't know about that. No, I don't think there's a wrong way to say something. It's just different ways of saying things. If I said Mika Suckus, would that be the normal way to say something it's just different ways of saying so like if i said mika suckas would that be like the normal way to say it i would probably like correct you and be i would say you know i don't really like that and that's not really how i pronounce it oh you don't like that but i thought like yeah you said it no i i remember mika said her whole mika suckas yeah well you know words and language evolve and change over time so yeah it's just a matter of time before people

start saying tortilla perhaps i don't know we can't predict the language just hypothetically yeah like hypothetically like mika suckas just that could happen hypothetically yeah it could i suppose she was she was slapping on my meat with that mika suckas put that flat in my astro now we got something we can work on this how do we rub your name into it a pen i get yeah i don't so speaking of giving up, if anyone needed another reason to give up, apparently M&M's is getting rid of the mascots. It's messed up, man. Yeah, they're getting rid of the mascots. There were so many sexy. I mean, they were all sexy, I think.

The green one, the new purple one. Schlatt loves the yellow one. Even Schlatt's favorite yellow one. Schlatt, how do you feel about that? I love the yellow M&M. It sucks to see him gone so soon. What do you like so much about him? I relate.

What about him do you relate with? His size. Oh, wow. Yeah. He is a big guy. I feel like the yellow m&m sometimes when i look in the mirror i think that's very fair so you're saying you're you're tall we for sure like we know that yeah are you shaped like him or yes like an egg. I'm shaped like an egg.

I mean, he's dumb, right? What? Like he's a little clumsy. What? What? Yeah. Like he's like the dumbass. What did you say?

Of the M&Ms. He's like the idiot. He's the dumbass? Did you just say? What do you mean he's the dumbass? Is he like the dumb one? What do you mean the dumb one? He even has the dumb voice.

He has like the Patrick Star voice. He is not dumb! He's misunderstood! I don't think he can be dumb. He's voiced by JK Simmons, isn't he? What? No, he's not.

Isn't he voiced by JK Simmons? The whiplash drum teacher? Yeah. No. Oh my fucking God. He is, right? JK Simmons talks,

letting his voice to yellow. Oh my God. What? I feel like not enough people know this like well he just got laid off so oh my fucking god jk simmons is the goddamn yellow m&m yeah you can't say he's dumb like that's so funny honestly let's find out the other

one is right it's like chris pratt yeah dude imagine chris pratt just voices all the m&ms charlie day dude what if charlie day was like the red m&m i could see him being the red m&m he's voiced by billy west that guy was like everything. Okay. Eminem's got some big names they're pulling for the voice actors. Yeah, so the Eminems are gone. So just thought we would let all the sorry guys. Sorry

everybody. Fucking sucks. Hey, but we still got Marshall Mathers. What? Eminem. We still do have Slim Shady. We unfortunately still have him do do do do you know what i think i think it's like first two albums were good but then after that he just fell off it's like a coldest take

i'm not my kids you're right You're right It's a great take Two good albums I like the Marshall Mathers LP too But that's just because I listened to it when I was like four What's the one that has Rap God on it? I'm beginning to feel like a Rap God Rap God

I'm beginning to feel like a Fap God Rap god. I'm beginning to feel like a fap god. Fap god. He has another song about fapping. Oh, Fack? Are you talking about Fack? Yeah, Fack. Dude, Fack is the craziest song I've ever heard. That is the most...

He sounds like Eric Cartman throughout the whole song. He does. What are the lyrics? There's a line in it where he says, yeah. He's like, I shoved a gerbil up into my ass. What? Yeah, he says that, man.

Damn that bitch can't twist. She's been like a damn contortionist. Come on, my dick. Of course she is. We found the gerbil line. He goes, I like boobs, boobs, boobs. Now see that gerbil grab that tube,

shove it up my butt, let that little rascal nibble on my asshole yeah right there right there ah i'm coming oh yeah okay pull it out now oh fuck yeah wait he's not out he's still crawling around up there ow fuck i think it's stuck ow i'm gonna fucking come you see she like you know all the lyrics to Black Eyed Peas? I know all the lyrics to Fat. Yeah, we're a concert. It's the worst song ever made.

What possessed him to write this? I can't believe that's real. What are some of the worst lyrics you've ever heard just in your life? Those. Those right there. I mean, those kind of make me want to like rip my ears off for sure i wear a mask with a smile for hours and hours at a time ceiling while i hold back what's on my mind they ask me how i'm doing i say i'm just fine i'm just fine a panda yeah. Like on the topic list, you wrote down Happy by Pharrell.

And this song is very old. Sunshine, she's here. Let him take a break. Yeah, why did you write that? Can you explain that? I have a loon and a float of space. So you're just going to sing a... I'm going to waste your time.

Here's why. Because I'm happy. So you're not going gonna talk about it. Why did you put that? I mean, Shly, do you see that? He wrote it down. Because I'm happy. Clap along if you wish.

I'm on Zillow. I don't give a shit. Because I'm happy. Clap along if you wish. Mika, do you know what he's talking about? I really don't. I don't know why he did this I think I'm just gonna join in

Happy, happy, happy Happy, happy, happy Happy, happy, happy Happy, happy, happy Happy, happy, happy Sad, sad, sad Fouchy, fouchy, fouchy sad sad sad fauci fauci fauci fauci fauci

fauci fauci fauci ouchie fauci ouchie i can't believe people said fauci ouchie hey asher you get your fauci ouchie no yeah i did actually today dude imagine if you punched the shit out of someone you just got that fauci ouchie fauci took my actually today dude imagine if you punched the shit out of someone

you just got that Fauci dude if Fauci was like a rapper he could make a song called Fauci Ouchie about how he kills his ops with his fists Fauci Ouchie Ouchie

is that how it would go? I don't know because Pharrell would probably like drone strike and we did that i think i finally remembered one of the worst lyrics i've ever heard okay okay uh i don't i don't give a bread what's that even mean derp i don't know that sounds like a fred lyric or like there's this one fred song that gets stuck in my head all the time i can't remember right now I don't know. That sounds like a Fred lyric or like annoying. There's this one Fred song that gets stuck in my head all the time. I can't remember right now.

It's like the Fred Christmas song. You got it? Sorry, I'm really... Really? No one's going to be with me on this bit, but... It's called Christmas is Creepy. By Fred? Yeah, that one really... I used to listen to that one as a wee lad hey it's me like you used to enjoy it no like i think i hated it but it's like kind of catchy i mean when i was a kid i enjoyed some pretty terrible songs if the

snowman came to life, that would be creepy. Then he goes, creepy. I mean, I don't think it would be creepy. I think it would be kind of like miraculous. What about if Santa Claus snuck in the house? Would that be creepy? If it was really Santa, it would be kind of miraculous. You know? Yeah, but like, what if he like came down your chimney at night?

I mean, if it was really Santa, it would be like pretty miraculous, you know? Whatever, dude. You don down your chimney at night um i mean if it was really santa it would be like pretty miraculous you know whatever dude you don't get it yeah you don't get fred's lyricism it's fine do you guys remember uh narwhals narwhals swimming in the ocean causing a commotion because they are so awesome what what what about this one no badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger mushroom What about this one? No. This is how we do it. I'm gonna rock and tell on market day. Everybody will say that I've got another little crown. This is how we do it.

This is how we do it. This is how we do it. I would take the M&M, the yellow M&M and I would rip his fucking legs off. Me too, dude. Like a spider. Yeah, just one by one watching spiders scream. Dude, imagine they're rolling on the ground

like a nugget. Imagine there's a commercial where you actually do rip off his legs one by one and then J.K. Simmons has to go into the recording studio and he's just like, Ah! Oh, like Peter Griffin? Like that one Petereter griffin bit yeah exactly imagine jk

simmons in the studio being like ah i would take him and i would put him on the sidewalk on a sunny day and i would get out a magnifying glass and i'm just i pee on him oh yeah so um i i forgot to say basically since they don't have a mascot they got a spokesperson who is their new spokesperson is maya rudolph do you know maya rudolph yeah from snl fame do you think she's funny astro no so i'm not too familiar with maya rudolph but if i'm not mistaken i don't know like i saw her in a show where she was like a judge for a little bit on the show i don't know if this is like a hallucination good place yeah and um i don't know like i didn't really click with her sense of humor you know she's sort of like a lol xd millennial random so they make like a funny face

at the camera i fucking hate people like that yeah and then the snl audience goes crazy i hate modern s the snl has been bad for like 30 years is it because it's just run by a bunch of millennials now yeah man it's all bad they're like doing jokes that are 10 years old kidding right but the elon one was hilarious i don't understand what you mean elon one that shit was so awkward man he was so out of his doctor a bit he seems so uncomfortable the whole time so um did you guys have a good day i think we should kill all millennials wow just like have a gap in the human lineage that would suck there would be that would cause issues down the road, I imagine. Oh, come on. No, but it would. I mean, let's be real.

It would. That would cause issues down the road with things. I don't know why. Okay. I don't know why. They're not going to be able to pay into the social security systems. It's going to be put on us. It already is.

No, no, no. But what I mean is like rather than us sharing the load with the millennials, since the millennials are going to be gone, it's going to be like Gen Z is going to have to support the entirety of like Gen X and the boomers. You know what I mean? We already do. No, but millennials pay into the system too. I don't.

You know what I mean yeah i guess but like we're just giving it all to the boomers yeah so so so now imagine the millennials are gone right yeah based okay now we're starting somewhere the millennials are probably listening to this with like their double chin sticking out their tongue dude what or or they're doing that i fucking hate millennials dude or that or that millennial zoom in like or uh before they record a video there's like a pause oh the millennial pause yeah i know what you mean yeah it's so true though like um once someone pointed it out to me like i can't unsee unsee it. Just staring at the camera, dead eye for a second. It's kind of depressing.

Well, I mean, it's going to happen to us someday, too. You know, we're going to be the new millennials. Oh, yeah. I'm always going to be fresh. You are, man. You absolutely are. There's absolutely no way around it. Eventually, you're just going to be an old person.

No, no, man. Yep. We're going to be cool. We're going to be cool. We're not. And we're gonna be cool we're not and we're already not because if you ask kids like oh what's the hand sign for a phone they do like it's like they're like imagine you hold a smartphone like you make a square with your hand instead of like the telephone sign yep that's because you're holding money to your head yeah or it's like uh you ask

like a kid to take a picture and then instead of you know the little camera click thing we do they just like pretend they're holding a smartphone and like click with their thumb and like press their thumb so they're gonna be so many things that just single you out as being old and out of touch and there's nothing you can do about it or they just stick up the middle finger and say no f you they'll probably have some sort of new middle finger man man, that we don't even understand. Yeah. Yeah, man.

Maybe they'll do gang signs. What's after Gen Z? Is it just Gen A? It's Gen Alpha. Gen Alpha. And then Beta. Imagine being in the Beta generation. Yeah, that couldn't be me.

We could kill Gen Beta. Wow. Those are Betas. No one's got... They're not even born yet. I mean, that couldn't be me. We could kill Gen Beta. Wow. They're not even born yet. I mean, you can't get upset at that. You know what that voice crack reminded me of? It reminded me of Andrew Tate's voice crack. That's actually a good segue. I hate that.

There's this one video of him. Because he's's in jail right now he's in prison right he's he's with the cockroaches and bed bugs and worms and oh yeah oh poor guy and uh and he finally got out of jail for a bit and he has like a full-on beard he doesn't even look like his old self he looks like a completely different person. He hasn't shaved or anything. And he had this voice crack. And it's the funniest fucking thing. It made me laugh. Can you reenact it? I don't know.

It was freaking epic, dude. You should voice Morty. Oh my god, yeah. You guys think Rick and Morty's gonna fall off even more now? Or do you think it might get even better now that Justin Soylent is gone? Dude. Can you stop calling him Justin Soylent? Like, I get it, but

I get the joke, but like... It has been like six episodes. Every episode you say Justin Soylent. It comes so naturally. I legitimately don't think of what comes out of my mouth. I can tell. Yeah, I can tell.

And the first word that comes to your head, go. Wiener. Really, dude? Astro, first word that comes to your head, go. Burger. Slap, first word that comes to your head, go. Bitch. Dr. Pepper.

You can't say three words. Mika, first word that comes to your head, go. Bitch. Dr. Pepper. Mika, first word. Wow. You can't say three words. Sorry. Mika, first word that comes to your head. Blue. Okay. I think you should admit yourself to a doctor.

What? Blue. That's all you got? You said first word, man, not singular. What? That was singular. Come on, man. That's it? Blue? That's all you're thinking about?'re thinking about after your first sentence that comes to your head right now i'm riding a giraffe in the sunset but you're so dude you're such a millennial dude that's so xd

random that's zoomer of me that's so i saw it on a TikTok. That's so XD random of you. The kids these days, they're also random now. They just be saying random shit. Like the fucking TikTok humor. It's just a bunch of random words and sentences just compiled together. Yeah. It's true. He's right, you know.

Can we pull that meme up on the screen, Moist? Yeah. Moist, can you pitch up my voice for the rest of the podcast that'd be actually awesome if you could moist can you lower mine yeah moist can you um can you like auto-tune me for the rest of you can you pan schlatt to the left that might be really distracting and your left i'm in your left ear um schlatt how has uh browsing on zillow been great i'm looking at land really like just to build a house on or no just to own like i like the idea of having land you know being able to say i own this the dirt here you know if you uh if you really like that

i i heard there's like this cool thing you can do where in Scotland you can buy a square foot of land and then become a lord. You'll become a lord. I did hear about that. I heard about that, actually. A couple of YouTubers told me. Yeah, they did. I shell it. Are you going to become a lord in Scotland?

Buy a star in the sky, too. Yeah. I heard it comes from a Scottish tradition where landowners are referred to as a lord or laird or lady. Lady? You can also buy the Patreon too. Yeah.

You could do that. There is a Patreon. We do have. For $5 a month you can become a lord. It would fund us. Let's be transparent about where the earnings are going. Okay. All the money we make on the Patreon has been going into a slush fund where we're saving up to buy as much land as possible in the Austin area.

Well, yeah, I don't know about that. And we're going to build cheap housing there. Affordable housing. Yeah, and rent it out to people. Well, I don't know. You don't have to rent it out. We can just give them the opportunity to buy. We can rent it out to people well i don't know the opportunity to buy we can just give it to people well i give it to people what is that how does that make sense you know just like people that need it how does that make sense i mean you know it wouldn't make a lot

of money but i mean actually the right thing to do hearing about this it'd make no money what's the point they should work for it. It's for them. Okay, how about this? We don't have to charge them every week, but maybe once a month. That's how it normally is. What do you mean? Do you get charged once a week?

Yeah, and I tip him, too. How much are you paying once a week? Yeah, and I tip him, too. How much are you paying once a week? Is it like a quarter of what you're paying once a month? Oh, my God. Wow. But then he comes with the iPad, and I feel pressured to put in the 25%. Okay. It's weird.

The no tip option is grayed out. Does he let you play games on the iPad? No, he doesn't let me keep it. You can't play games on it? Like Angry Birds? There's no games. Okay. So this actually raises an excellent question.

Would you rather have um games unlimited games or bacon but no games follow us over to the patreon uh uh do the five dollars a month and the episode extends to a double on the Patreon. We also have exclusive Patreon shows and viewer Collins, that's right.

This is how we do it. You could be a guest on this podcast. This is how we do it. and we also have a discord we have a discord server bubba booey bubba booey